Back Side - 17: I Secretly STALKED My Favourite Youtuber! Lewis is Friends With Kai Cenat? & More

Episode Date: August 8, 2024

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Welcome to a new episode of Backside with me, Reeve, Theo Baker, Tom Garrett and Lewis Bowden. If you haven't already hit follow, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week. And if you want to see more Backside, catch us on YouTube, TikTok and Instagram, where all you have to do is search Backside. Let's get into it. All right, guys, guys, guys, when Reeve gets here, we're all going to show our best shit. I don't have one. I have one. This wasn't actually me. We're all going to show our best shit. I don't have one. I have one.

This wasn't actually me. We're all going to show our best shit. He has to... If I search poo into the search bar, will it show it? He has to... What do you call it? He has to debate, which is better. Lewis, Lewis, have you got a photo of that poo-poo?

I've got a photo of my poo-poo. Here he is. You have to vote on something. Let's get you set up and you can vote. Cut. You have to vote on something Let's get you set up And you can vote Cut Lewis it's time for you To get your monster shit up And show Reeve I'm trying to find

A picture of me poo I've got mine And I think I know Who wins this competition My poo If I find it It's definitely Beating all your shit

Lewis Oh is that what I'm voting on Who's turd is lewis uh rave you know i know the backstory of this year and i've seen that so i i have an idea of how big one of them is hell let's see that tom that's a eel oh that's pretty big to be fair that's not big it's like venom's finger the thing is that that misses out on girth oh i didn't see the second half that misses out That's like Venom's finger. The thing is, that misses out on girth points. Oh! I didn't see the second half of it. That misses out. That's like an eel coming out of the thing. It misses out on girth points, though, that.

Okay, well, that's the winner. That's insane. That's like a... Is that a... Fucking hell. It's not even touching the water. Yeah, it's outrageous. It's in an Austrian toilet.

You missed the water. It's an Austrian toilet, so it's flat. Why? I like the little bit they squeezed out afterwards. I just... It's in an Austrian toilet. You missed the water. It's an Austrian toilet, so it's flat. Why? I like the little bit they squeezed out afterwards. I just turned so fat. It's just mental, right? When you... Are we committing murder?

When you have, like, a big poo and you feel it coming out, it's mental. You're like, whoa, bloody hell, what are you doing? Yeah, and you kind of have to, like, you kind of have to check it out, don't you? Otherwise it'll rip your asshole. So we're going to start this episode by, we all get to give you a slap around the neck. No, flick on the ear. We give you a flick on the ear.

Why? Properly throw it in there. Look at his fucking neck, it's so rude. This is abuse. What's going on? I'll tell you why. You know exactly why. Oh, can I get one as well?

We'll explain. You prick! Oh, I heard that. that was a punch so we have taken all the the fellow studios and all the fellas podcast fellas loaded do you know what we're doing so this is fellas loaded set but obviously no one's ever seen this before because no one's

ever paid for fellas loaded so we decided to use it ourselves yeah well they stole our set and they keep knocking

it down and taking bits of it at what point do we need to fight back and say come on lads show your one of your biggest podcasts

their respect huge enterprise at this point give us a set they're trying to kill us because we're killing their pod I think I know what kind of set I want

go on then I want a dirty garage a dirty garage a dirty garage and play some garage music and a scruffy man cave yeah that's fine

like a man cave would be cool no no no not a man cave but not like a good one a garage no I want a garage I don't want a man cave I want a garage

with some ladders in it and like a saw or like a 150,000 pound home gym Nice I couldn't give a shit I think we just stay here man We just take their shit now

No I don't like using these mate I want a garage This is crap Yeah I don't like these Mike I do like how you can go like Oh The good thing about a garage right Is that you would never have to clean the set

Because it just adds Yeah Adds to it doesn't it yeah the dust you can leave it sorry well no

it would actually be a garage nobody cleans the sets anyway who's the set cleaners yeah the company me no but what's getting dirty here

I mean none of the background's actually getting dirty well yeah fuck this set it's theirs we just sort of smash it up when we flip the switch and play some dirty garage

in the garage. Yeah, man. I say, if we don't get a set by next week, we just take the actual fellas' podcast set. No. Stop.

Why are you so obsessed with them? Nah, come on, man. Well, they're the one who's taking away our stuff. Think outside the box, bro. We used to be somewhere. Why don't we just film outside? The box?

Yeah, exactly. In a bin. We'll put you in a bin. Yeah. That's alright. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Our set could actually be like a... A bin. Like a bin. We'll put you in a bin. That's alright. Oh my god. Oh my god. We could,

our set could actually be like a, a bin. Like a bin area. That's what I suggested, yeah. When? So we're outside. Why don't,

when did you, we make our set a giant water park. Yeah. That sounds fun. Yeah. I like that. Or like a little,

every time someone wants to say something, they have to slide to the bottom of the slide and then they get the microphone and go, whoa. We could, we could. Or like a little... Every time someone wants to say something, they have to slide to the bottom of the slide and then they get the microphone and go, whoa. We could make it a Jimmy Clappin. And we put a little light text.

And I'm just there. Yeah. Yeah. And we get to whip you. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, no. Don't worry.

What? Were you going to say something boring? Yeah, and then every time you want to speak, we take one more anal beat up. Okay. Careful of that wire. That can be a bit delicate. You're fucking...

I have a question for every... I have a question for everyone. That first bit's going in. No, I'm trying to... Can I just mention one thing? Before we really get going into this. Reeve, what have you been doing? I'm filming.

Pitchside... I'm going to ask my question then. Pitchside released a clip today. This week, sorry. I heard about that. And Reeve had a bit of a terrible take where he was saying, I know we shouldn't talk about football, but it was a terrible take saying Crystal Palace are better than England.

And then I scroll over into the comments. Go on. And see Reeve responding once again to people trying to respond. No, I didn't respond. I put a comment in on it. That's no different to him doing a comment on every post. You commented on it as well. Look how triggered he is.

No, I'm not triggered. You are. He's like, please, guys. I know what I'm talking about. Please. This is what I meant. This is what I meant. I deserve that.

Go on, carry on. And this is where you get your nickname from. What nickname? Commenter Reeve, you comment on everything. Commenter Reeve? Yeah, you reply to everyone in the comments. Hey guys, what I went to go on to say was this. I said this.

Projecting, projecting. No, I'm not actually here. In recent times, I've seen Theo comment on quite a few replies. On what, where? On Pixar videos. When? When people say come with you no what i love about your comment this time rave is because you did it on the instagram and then

you went over to the youtube clip and commented the same thing i see these things i mean actually i only saw the tick tock but you're covering your bases on all the audiences i thought you know i i think you don't care about like no it was only tiktok i saw it it's on tiktok instagram and youtube video youtube video that's it it's not it's on the youtube i'm trying to find your i don't see your comment though where is it on the latest one lewis has been caught out yeah it's definitely on the youtube video. No, I didn't comment on a YouTube video, mate. So it was just Instagram and TikTok? Yeah.

You just made that one up. Yeah, you just lied again. Okay, well... Instagram and TikTok? Mate, I'm happy to have done that, but you tried to exaggerate it and made me sound even worse. Yeah.

That's... Ooh, you win. So actually, the amount of comments are the same from me and you. Where is this? Where is this? I don't understand where this comment is. I put crying emojis. Like just laughing. Oh here we go, I've got it.

I go on to say that international football is slower than Premier League, but this is not the show to lose your train of thought on. There's nothing wrong with that. Crying face. What's wrong with that? You're defending yourself man, you've just got to accept the L in the moment he's got the rage building inside I'm not a rage person English or Spanish? We did that last time. He lost.

What's happening there? They're doing English or Spanish. What's that mean? It means are they gay? That's not to me. Well, we know Tom's going to lose. Well, this is fantastic. Good content, isn't it?

So if you listen to this, they're just stuck moving. I thought you were going to... Who lost? Who's going? Oh, damn. That's moving I thought I thought you were gonna Oh damn That's a shame I thought you were gonna ask me About my Fruity pub crawl You said

What have you been doing Instead of You need to say that In a different term I think Oh Instead of Instead of you were That was quick

That was quick He did a load of Fruity machines Yeah He went on Fruity machines Yeah He went on Fruity machines Slot machine pub crawl He wasn't going around

Eating men's arses Around pubs Okay A fruity pub crawl Fruity is a term for like Being camp And homosexual isn't it Yeah

Maybe that's what We were doing as well But it wasn't You were sending pictures of Actually you were sending Pictures of fingers up arses I thought they were just women Okay

Okay Yeah Came up Up from the day It's good times I can't believe you won of actually you were sending pictures of fingers up arses i thought they were just women okay um yeah uh came up up from the day it's good times i can't believe you won two grand on a fruit machine that's mental that didn't happen how much did you win they don't even offer that much uh came away with i think 62 pounds that's a lot of money for the end it is it's across multiple ones wasn't that's still a lot of money and you won when you come to my pub you won like 40 and when you went to the the casino the other day yeah is it's across multiple ones wasn't it that's still a lot of money for fruities and when you come to my pub you won like 40 quid and when you went to the

casino the other day I actually don't lose on fruit machines which is crazy I'm blackjack I swear or was it roulette you played roulette yeah you're kind of wild

with that you have great luck there's a guy it's because I think I don't care about the outcome which means that yeah because the fruit machine knows

if you care or not I'm talking about roulette wise oh the roulette table knows if you care or not gambling in general if you don't care you tend to I don't know it is a weird if you care or not. I'm talking about roulette wise. Oh, the roulette table knows if you care or not. Gambling in general, if you don't care, you tend to,

I don't know, it is a weird, if you go there needing money, you never win. If you go there and go, I've got to win, man. Yeah, you never win. Trust me, you never win.

It's a mindset thing, man. Because you bet differently, you'll bet differently and you'll overthink things. It's red or black. Or you'll look at the previous. It's red or black. No, but people overthink things

if they need money. Yeah, so if, let's just say if I go into the casino which obviously i don't you know encourage gambling at all if i go to the casino and i'm like okay i really need to win this one and i look at the board and the board's like red red red red red red red statistically it's got to be black now man if i'm going to try and win it makes no difference like oh it i feel like red today bosh red but actually statistically every spin is completely new and different

yeah I know it makes no odds I know if you go in there needing money you'll overthink it and think well there's been six reds

so it has to be black yeah and then you lose and go fuck sake but you could go but you could go in there with not caring the world and go black and lose

no 100% but you yeah what I'm saying is just from my experience when I've gone in without caring the world I've tended to do better than when I've needed or wanted desperately to win.

You just run off the vibe and the fun of winning rather than actually meaning something to you. I think that's the difference. It does make a difference, trust me. You get that one day, man. I just lose regardless. Yeah, I don't win. I never win.

But that's because you only bet on black, mate. And also, you do silly things. Like, if you have footy bets you'll have like oh my mate does it he'll have he'll have like corners and fouls and cards and all

and I'm like and I just have a bet on like the score or yeah just goal score it's just one thing bang done easy who gives a fuck yeah he said

I'm sitting there going oh I need I need four more corners for 30 quid it's like oh just get a fucking life and have a real bet sorry Tom

anyway you're hard i got a question for everyone with the olympics going on i'm bored if you had four years to train oh sure what olympic sport would you choose yeah we did it and you won't come last yeah we did a pod like two pods ago didn't we we've done this we've never done this we did yeah that's how we came up with the whole like 12 olympic sports to pick. Oh, yeah. That's literally the start of the question. God, not like you two are fucking really good. There goes our TikTok

we decided to do, Lewis. The only reason you're saying archery is because it says online, oh, you should choose a sport. Have you seen how far the fucking target is? What? No, I'm choosing archery

because in four years I think I could get pretty good at it. Yeah. I'm not going to get really fucking good at golf enough to compete at that level. I'm not fit enough to really fucking good at golf enough to compete at that level I'm not fit enough to compete

in the road cycling I'm not fit enough to be a 100 metre sprinter what about like the 1500 metres no way are you fucking joking that's one of the

hardest things to not come last in I'm just asking you a question archery is as simple as I'm looking at a target I'm drawing back

and if I miss it I'm out if I don't that's one of the least skilled. Or pistols, because then you don't even have to draw back. Or the shooting, yeah. Blade pigeon shooting. No, no, no. No, just like the one where the guy's just like,

not got the magnifying glasses on and that. The hitman, you mean, the ex-Turkish hitman. Yeah, the Turkish hitman. Take all those fucking earmuffs off and magnifying glasses. How are they allowed, all that shit? You should just have, it should just be. How are you allowed trainers that make you faster, Lewis? Right, earmuffs, fine, but all this magnifying glass and are they allowed all that shit you should just have it should just be how are you allowed trainers that make you faster Lewis

Emo's fine but all this magnifying glass and the eye blockers no it's not it's not magnifying glasses it's what you just said it's an eye blocker

because you're no the only ones have a magnifying you have an eye blocker on this one and then the other ones like a magnifying glass if they're in the

allowed rules then why not just I think it should be more raw shouldn't it Lewis isn't it just... It's like swimmering. It's just sport technology. Our swimming costumes change over the years.

Our bikes have changed over the years. It's like swimming. You give them flippers. It's like, well, that's not really counting. Well, no, because swimmers once used the tech suit, like one of the tech suits, didn't they? The swimsuit, which Phelps broke all the records in. And then it became illegal

and they can't wear it anymore. See, I was just about to ask you this. When I was watching the swimming the other day, they had the Australian guy on who won it in 2000 in Sydney. Yeah. And they obviously went back to his old clip and he had a full swimsuit on.

Torpedo. Yeah. Ian Thorpe. Graham Thorpe. Ian Thorpe, isn't it? Yeah. But he was really young as well, wasn't he, I think.

But why don't they wear those suits anymore? It's illegal. It's more beneficial, is it? It's been banned. Because they're so tight, it makes you so, like, streamlined, I guess. And then they had special material

on the outside of it, which would, like, fly off. It's essentially sharp skin. Yeah, right. Oh, okay, that makes sense. They walk too fast. Yeah.

What would you pick? 100 metres. No, you wouldn't. No, you wouldn't. You wouldn't. After 30, like, it's tough to sprint what would I actually pick

I thought you'd prepare something I think it has to be you raised the question you know what I think I'd go archery the statistics say choose a sport like archery or shooting

because I just thought of that no it's all over the internet I haven't seen that but it seems like the most logical thing to choose you've got four years to just i would also find it quite boring

no way that's so you want the least technical sport see the guy what's the least technical sport in the olympics oh running gotta be running. Oh, yeah running just Not sprinting I'm sort of like long distance running throw throw on that ball when these swivel around that's so technical you joking Are you mental? Yeah Yeah, but compared to the other sports like everything's technical, running is quite technical. No. As a half marathon. You proved it wasn't. You literally proved it wasn't, mate. As a half marathon runner, I can tell you it's a pretty tricky sport. That is not.

That is the stark opposite of what you said. But like compared to other sports in the Olympics. I don't think anything athletics based. Yeah. I think you're right. Anything outside the stadium, you got a better chance at. No, but hurdles is very technical.

No, I'm saying I wouldn't choose anything athletics based. What about javelin? No, but hurdles is very technical. No, I'm saying I wouldn't choose anything athletic-based. What about javelin? No way. That is very technical. No, I know, but four years to like... Long jump. I think people discredit how difficult hammer throw shots are. No, no, no.

I don't discredit. I'm just throwing out sports and see what your reaction would be. No. You don't have the... You don't have the sprint. No, no, no. He's saying the least technical. That's probably not a good jump.

Sprint is so technical. The all technical. The timing to land before the thing that you're not doing. The all technical. The least technical. The least. Ability in the air. Yeah, we agree, but like.

Out of every sport. Yeah. No, running, long distance running is less technical than long jump. Yeah, is it? Of course it is. Long jump, you just sprint and then all you've got to do is time your foot on the paddle. That's quite hard. That's harder to do than running in a straight, in a line.

No, I know, but it's, I don't know, timing, the technique of your running and the timing. To get your bum in front of where your legs land. I think you can teach that in four years, like, usually compared to, like, fucking... All right, Lewis, I'll give you four years. I think long jumps up there is one of the easiest technically wise.

You just run fast and jump. Run fast and jump innit. I think long distance running is definitely the least technical sport at the Olympics though. I heard that if you break the world record

at the Olympics you don't get paid. But if you break it in like for example the Diamond League in sprinting or whatnot you get money for a new world record.

I don't think you get paid in the Olympics at all. You do. For gold medals each federation will pay the athletes certain for a gold federation yeah oh i think team gb is not no no no but the olympics as an organization oh no no they don't pay anything they don't pay any fucking big scam isn't it really yeah they they wouldn't even let sponsors in until like the 70s mental yeah and now it's what a multi-billion pound 7 billion dollars and they don't give

any to the athletes that's a fucking disgrace alright that's badass it's very badass a lot of people say curling but that's

the winter olympics but then someone said actually only one team gets sent from each country in the curling so it's actually

very hard to make the team yeah of course what sport would you add to the olympics I of course. What sport would you add? What sport would you add to the Olympics? I think like competitive fishing. That would be the most boring thing

I've ever seen. It has to be attractive to watch though, doesn't it? This is why, right? This is why. Because all the other sports that's happening all the time, competitive fishing,

it's like the golf. You can just leave it on all day and just watch them nicely fish. No, no. No one wants to watch that. What about competitive eating? No. You've got 10 Big Macs,

first one to finish wins. That'll be exciting. That's a real sport, you know. It's got to be a legitimate sport. The introduction of BMX is dark to be sick. As a spectator game, yeah. BMX is sick to watch. BMX was so classy. You know how they got

the MLS All-Stars thing with the different challenges? Like what about like 10 free kicks, 10 cross, like different football challenges.

Football challenge. What, fucking YouTube? Football challenge Olympics. Oh, ooh! Do you know the one when the dogs go through like the tunnels and that? Like Croft.

Yeah. Like dog show. Yeah, but you can't have a dog representing the country. How would you know if the dog's English or like Team GB or American?

Imagine you have a Team GB dog. That'd be class, man. Your Team GB's dog. Yeah, but it would like... What happens if the dog's from like Spain? No, because he's not allowed. I'd like to know.

Do you know the equestrian? Are all the horses bred in the country they represent or not? Because that would be interesting. I don't know. They take them with them, I know. I think it's a trainer.

In the UK, bred in like Ireland and France. I'll tell you what I take them with them, I know. I think it's a trainer. Especially in the UK, bred in Ireland and France. I'll tell you what I do know, though, which is kind of cute, actually. You know the plane that goes around

picking up all the horses for the Olympics? It's called Air Horse 1. No, it actually is. Where have you seen this? I promise you it is. Google it. I saw it.

You saw it? Yes, it's called Air Horse 1. Are you sure that was the plane That gets all the horses Yeah it's the Olympic It's the Olympic plane horse Called Air Horse 1 So you're telling me

This plane goes country to country Making up horses Well it only goes to a couple It only goes to a couple countries Because all the horses Are in like one location You have definitely Fell for something here

It's called Air Horse 1 Stop saying it So the Swiss horses Are in the same place As the GB horses Might be yeah No they're not. Says who?

You're talking shit. Air Horse 1. Good air horse. Air Horse 1. This class, right. Do you know COD 4, like the tutorial mission where you go through the building? Oh we fucking have a 2v2. You get the best special forces from every country, you send them and they go through

the laid out plan. That would be pretty cool, yeah. And you have cameras in all the rooms and you have to blast down the targets which special forces are the best that's good yeah that's what people do yeah he's just by himself what about like a tough mother in the olympics oh sure that's a real thing like cross country for horses but for humans yeah in mud imagine being a tough mother in the olympics that'd be sick okay well you've i say special ops you say special ops oh a new one um i'd like to see like fighter jet something plane related like that sounds like a crash that like yeah fuck it man

well you like you know you got rings so someone dying is fuck it to you is it no it's like it's like fighter jet dressage and they have to do skills in the air and you go oh that's pretty cool what's air balloon oh i've got one f1 but they all have the same car yeah that would be classic just a go-karting go-karting yeah the olympic go-kart i know feels feels is um tough mudder or time race i'll tell you what the ones yeah but obviously you choose the one um i'll tell you what has been really good that they've introduced the slalom shit do you know when they

which the kayaks the canoe the canoe slalom oh my god I get bored of them no bro there's one

and they can bash into it yeah yeah yeah it's like BMX it's like BMX racing as well isn't it they start and then they get dropped in

to the water and someone's like already like two metres ahead that is pretty cool and you think oh you think someone's getting a lead they're like oh they're away and gone no no no because when they come to that turn someone comes oh i'll be mean do you just mad about the bmx is like they're clipped in with like yeah like a bike a mountain bike yeah they're all clipped in that's terrifying

right of the olympics i do love the olympics i must admit i've been all over it there's hardly anything i will not watch over there now the skateboarding that is it's just fun Olympics I do love the Olympics I must admit I've been all over it this year there's hardly anything I will not watch over there now the skateboarding that is shit it's just fun

it's over now I want that gone what it's over now skateboarding isn't it yeah and they're

all like 11 like why it's a new sport how can you be that young in the Olympics I don't get it

well you have to be 12 to win the Olympics oh sorry the fucking diving I love the diving it's unreal

I love it it's one of my favourite sports. Oh my God. There's like a bit of a splash, I'm like, fair shit. Also question, do you reckon you could jump off a 10 meter board? No way.

Actually, I think I could jump off it. It would hurt a lot. Yeah, no, but if you were taught to do a dive, do you reckon you'd do one? No. I'll do that, Rich Cafe, it's like an 11, I think it's a 10 meter jump. Okay, all right, in that case, Tom,

guess what we're doing for the next vlog? I'd happily do that. I'd happily do that. Tuck position do that. You don't like height. Backwards somersault. No, no, I just, it hurt. It hurt my feet. Yeah, you don't like height. You're jumping on a 10-meter, mate.

No, no, no. You will get. No, no, no. I don't like height. You've got to do it that way, though. The thing about height. You've got to break your. You die.

You die. It's the fear. Height is the fear of falling. You know if you fell on that water, it'd feel like concrete. But you, yeah, I wouldn't jump like belly flop No, but you gotta do the forwards on you go into the I'll try that Divers right they have like concussion shit and like they're like eggs when they when they do it I'll go in like the pencil

Here's what we're gonna do then we're gonna're going to organise a vlog and we're going to go try Olympic diving. You know 10-metre diving's that destructive that they only do like three 10-metre dives a week in training? Really? Yeah. I see them practising every time I go swimming at the Aquatic Centre.

It's crazy. Yeah. I would happily give that a go. Well, we were saying with the vlogs, you were saying the other day that we all will plan one. So it's like, goes around so you can do the dive day that we all will plan one so it's like goes around so you can do the dive

I get Tom Daley I see him at the pool quite a lot do you really yeah I've never said hello though what does he do he just dives I know his partner

Noah how as in like the guy that he dove with dove yeah is that the right word get Tom Daley

to teach us how to dive dived dived with dived with Dived with Sure No Dove is right Yeah Dove is right Dove

What the hell are you Anyway Do you mean the one At Stratford Oh nice Get him to Get him to Go on then

I reckon he'd definitely Get involved That'd be scary Ride buckside Go dive Mate Have you seen how they train By the way

So There's these machines Underwater that create all these huge bubbles, and it's a softer landing. Yeah. I've seen them when they do a lot of jumps into, like, the... You have to break the surface tension. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was presuming that's it, because they have water fountain score.

You know in the pool, there's always ripples at the bottom. It's so that the diver can see where the water is, because if the water's flat, you can't tell from the top where the water is, whereas if it's so that the diver can see where the water is because if the water's flat you can't tell from the top where the water is whereas if it's ripples you can see right then they turn on these huge jets that makes it a softer landing interesting right well we'll do that then i'd happily do that i can't i can't wait to play that clip of you saying i'll happily do that i would give it a cut in if you sat on the edge shitting yourself fair play to people that do that. I still remember him starting on Reeve when we were up on top of the stadium.

You've got to remember, that's fear of falling. You touch me one more time, I'm going to hit you. You were locked in. You were clipped into the fucking stadium. I swear now, when we get off here, I'm going to smack you. You literally clipped in. It doesn't... Yeah, but the fear of height, it's not...

It's a fear of falling. Yeah, I know. If you know you're going to jump off, if you know that. No, because you wouldn't do the ascend down where you know you're going to jump off. No, because that's like, if I fall, I'm dead. If I fall off this 10-meter platform, I'm going to jump anyway. If I fall, I'm not dead. It's only water.

It's not that bad. The eight-year-olds going down the top using the stairs. There was an eight-year-old's going down the top using the stairs there was an eight-year-old there was a video of me and harry jumping off a cliff in hawaii and we think that's upwards of 10 meters and that was the most that's like two two three seconds air time you're yeah or did it in jamaica rick's cafe i think it's about 10 meters and it is it's it's scary when you drop and it hurts the bottom of your feet and what are you going i'll talk i've got a video of it oh yeah you know what i found i found like the older i get the more nervous i am

to do things now yeah you just could you really not i think you realize that you're more fragile especially with my injuries as well yeah no genuinely like fuck it like i'm now i'm now i'm a little bit cautious to do weight board in the game because i know if you fall forward you can hurt your hip flexors yeah that's different for you because you've had a history of injuries and you know like

I could backflip on a weight board and now I'm too scared to get on one hmm okay mine was 25 feet

it's 7.6 metres oh so so it wasn't 10 metres well no I didn't say it was definitely 10 metres I would do 10 that's it I haven't got the video okay that's all right

mate still pretty high yeah that's pretty high fair play man fair play man good job man i can't wait to get a 10 meter diving board i realize how high that is so so so with the vlog right is that the one are you gonna are you always you need to plan that one because well it's scary and hot i will do it, though. I would happily do that. We come on the show and we have to do your job for you. I understand how it works. No, but you know Noah.

Yeah, I do, actually. I can ask him. Or at least he could teach us. Is there rules how you jump off? Do you have to dive, like, head first? You can jump off, man. Can I not just dive and jump off? You can definitely practice by jumping off.

You'd get a one out of ten, but yeah, sure. No. Oh, I thought we were just doing it just a one out of ten, but yeah, sure. No. Oh, I thought we were just doing it just to dive off. No, I mean, yeah. But I mean, at the end of the video, he'll try to teach us how to do it. I just had this horrible vision of me backflipping off and just landing on the back of my head and just dying. Yeah, you could do like a backflip and then land with your feet. You'll take us through a lesson, man, and then you have to do it.

If you do a backflip off the 10-meter diving board, I will respect you for the rest of your life. I can't do it. I can do a frontflip. I can't do a backflip. I can't do anything. How do you do these things? You could die doing that. Do you have a trampoline?

Is it good? Nah. Well, we just wrestled on it. You definitely get paralyzed. Could you? We do that as well. Is it high enough to hurt yourself like that? Again.

We used to use boxing gloves and just fight on there, and you'd get knocked down and just smack down and go back off. Okay. I would get in a heebie-jeebies over here and there. I actually think

if I was to do it, I'd just have to go straight up and just do it immediately. I wouldn't jump if I'd slide off, sit on it and just put myself over the edge.

But then your feet are like nine metres away, aren't they? Yeah, exactly. That's the whole point. I'd feel unsure with a ladder. Or get into the pole

or just generally no like getting on top oh like walking up oh yeah I actually think that would be scary I'm like fucking hell I'm not climbing

everything's slipping you don't do that you walk up you're trapped Tom it's not a ladder I actually think imagine the divers

just falling off at the Olympics because they slipped on a wet ladder they walk up it's like stairs I thought there was a ladder there is a ladder on the high jumping competitions though that's crazy that's mental the ladder on the high high jump competition the boingy board from like three meters i'd love that that'd

be sick what is that called um springboard i think you wouldn't be able to you you wouldn't even have to get to the edge of the 10 meter diving board platform okay i think you'd be too scared he's calling you a pussy okay that's what no i do it theo baker the man who faces fears when i could do it i could jump i said i couldn't to be fair at the start of this conversation i don't think i could but i'd give it a go i'll give it a try i'm not saying i dive i'll put a jump i actually think there's more chance of me crying at the top than actually jumping.

I'd do what I did off the cliff. I'd jump with my arms out and just feet straight. I've done a bungee jump. It can't be that difficult. That as well is my worst fear. He's acting like you're being thrown out of a fucking Boeing.

At the end of it, I land in water, man. A bungee jump was like, fucking hell, if this pings, I'm dead. It stings your feet a bit, and that's it. I hate the feeling of adrenaline in your chest. That's crazy.

When you're falling. That's why I don't like roller coasters. I don't like the idea of bungee jumping, skydiving, any of that shit. You're a missionary, man. Roller coasters is fucking awful. The idea of going on there. Or like a roller coaster. I don't want to risk my life to go on a loop-de-loop.

You could say that about driving. That's safe. No, you can't. Do you like driving car? I'm controlling the vehicle, so I have some to risk my life to go on a loop-de-loop. You could say that about driving. That's safe. No, you can't. Do you like driving cars? I'm controlling the vehicle, so I have some control over my life. Yeah, that's probably worse. That isn't true. You don't have control against the thousands of other drivers.

It doesn't matter. I'm hands-on, and I can observe and mitigate any risk of death. A rollercoaster. Well, why more likely to get in a crash or die in a car than you are in a rollercoaster? 100%. Not if I don't take a rollercoaster. Well, yeah, because I don't go on rollercoasters that's why you got there in the end yeah nope i don't statistically that is fuck roller coaster man that feeling of adrenaline in your chest

that's literally what gets people going mate do you not feel any adrenaline life's about like on your half marathon towards the end i felt like the need to die what about generally when like Newcastle that is like that's the sort of shit that gets me going it's the feeling of falling because there's a bit where you like in a roll coaster where you go down and it feels like do you get scared on a swing When you get that weird Stomach feeling I get sick on a swing What the fuck Motion sickness That's a sex swing Motion No now you're talking

What a sad life you lead Yeah Have you moved our shit then Or what Do you know what Fucking Did you see that picture I sent in

No I don't look at anything You send ever So Lewis got caught Fly tipping Illegal Sent to jail Oh that picture

Yeah I did actually I want to know Jobs with man So You broke the law But okay I got a telly unit And I'm like How do I shift this Because like man So You broke the law But okay I got a telly unit And I'm like

How do I shift this Because like at home You just go and put it Like in a skip On London I don't know what you do There's no skips Nothing about

Facebook I don't have Facebook Isn't that also Tipping No you just go to Skip Skip No you don't use anyone

If someone's got a skip Outside their house You can't use it Yeah that's what I'm saying No I mean That's what I'm saying You're just fucking Dumping trash on there You could do that But all you can't use it. That's what I'm saying. No, I mean, no. That's what I'm saying. You're just fucking dumping trash on the air.

You could do that, but also, or you could leave it outside front. Surely that's not allowed. It's not what people do. They go to the dump. If you've got your own skip. The dump. I just hide it out and then you take it to the tip.

You take it to the tip. The dump. You call it the dump? You call it the dump. It's got the tip in it. I go to the dump. It's not the dump. The dump.

No. See for dump. Fucking hell. See for dump. The dump. It's the tip. It's not the dump. The dump. No. It's the tip, isn't it? Seaford dump. Fucking hell. Seaford dump. The dump. It's the tip. It's the tip. It's the tip, yeah.

You made that up and now you're acting like people say it. Oh my God, the dump. Seaford dump. No way. That's American. There's no way.

That's American. That's 100% a southern word then because tip is what I say. I promise you, my dad calls it the dump. We call it the dump. It's not the dump. No.

I promise you, we call it the dump. Anyways, right it the dump. It's not the dump. No, that's... I promise you we call it the dump. Anyways, right? You're really embarrassed now. Come right red. You should be. Right red. Right red.

Right red. So we take it downstairs, and I try and leave it outside where they used to leave free shit, and there's a sign saying, please don't leave stuff here. And I looked up, and there was a camera point at us. I was like, fuck's sake. So you left something there. You got your mug shot there. No, so I was like, Harry, let's just pop it in the bin room.

Like that. Boris doesn't come out blurry. I feel dizzy, though. Is that adrenaline? Yeah. So I was like, let's just take it to the bin room, which is fucking fine

because I should just chuck it in the bin, man. And then... What's he done? Then the geezer at the flat takes a screenshot of the cctv so like the concierge guy what's wait you've not so how long have you been living there yeah and you not made friends with the concierge that's one of the first things you do i know him as morning morning that's because you say because you say good morning to him and he goes morning morning no but you make friends with the concierge because in situations like this they have your back as morning morning because you say good morning to him and he goes morning morning

no but you make friends with the concierge because in situations like this they have your back I just say good morning to him you should try that

in the next one you're talking to someone who hates meeting people how big is this TV stand it's just like why wouldn't you just like sell it though

it's a piece of shit man I can't be arsed stuff like that like if I order some clothes of air sauce or something and it's like shit, man. I can't be arsed stuff like that. Like if I order some clothes off Airsoft or something and it's like they don't fit it I can't be arsed

going back and shopping and returning them for like £10. I'll just give it my mate. I'll just fuck it. Whatever. I've messed up. Like sell it for 15 quid.

It's not worth the asshole. Lewis stalked his boss to try and get himself a pay rise. By that I mean he actually flew after him to Rhodes, where he got stuck in Rhodes. I didn't get stuck in Rhodes. I don't know why you started spreading that.

As karma for stalking Chip and his girlfriend. I also got stuck in Rhodes. By the way, this isn't a joke. He literally went to the same holiday destination as Chip. I got a text from Chip saying, hey mate, bit weird, but I'm sat at dinner right now having a steak and I've looked up and Lewis is staring at me. Come on, Chip.

It wasn't having dinner. Do you know how infinitesimal of a probability that actually is like you just rocking up to the same location and the same week of the year as well? It's almost like he asked him where he was going and where he was staying and then just booked it after.

It's like too much of a coincidence there, mate. No, well, do you know what? We do share the birth... Oh, same birthday as well, me and Chip. So maybe we just think the same. We share the birth! We share the birth? Well, if it's his birthday, it's my birthday.

He's not going to care about me being here, so I'll just follow him. What really happened was it genuinely was just like a... Misunderstanding. No, but I think there's a butterfly effect here somewhere where someone's recommended a place to you and you also has discussed it with Chit.

Someone did recommend it to me, but it was someone, because I put a story on when I was trying to book it, saying someone recommend places and a geezer recommended where I stayed. He's a geezer, Chit. Yeah.

But it's, I don't know, have you ever seen someone where you really don't expect Have you ever seen someone Where you like really Like don't expect to see someone It's like so fucking surreal Because I was like I was drinks deep Like

Drinks deep I was a bit gone And just looking across And seeing this geezer with a mullet And Sabina's girlfriend And Sabina's girlfriend Sabina his girlfriend Try listening buddy

I can't I'm deaf Yeah it's just really weird But then we had a few drinks He was just having a quiet night Which was a bit fucking pussy And then No I heard you went on a big night out To Falareki

Is that what it's called What's it called Falareki Falareki Follow Chip Oh Because he did Don't follow Chip

Carry on now It was Chip's idea Well Chip the day after I then messaged him He's like Do you want to go to the strip So we all went on a big night out In like Magaluf that's the thing i'm magaluf you went to falaraki how was falaraki loads of fans um no i wasn't that bad you said you got approached by loads

who kept saying you're the best you said i'm so tired of taking photos now i had to wear a hat on a night out yeah i'm modest though you said you were getting mobbed at the airport when you're going through the security line lewis his queue encounter, and they are awkward. So Lewis was in a queue at the airport. Yeah, and they worked as a slather. And a nice guy was like, pitch sides. I'm like, yeah. And then you walk back around, and then you meet again at the next slather.

And it's just like, back side. I like how you've tried to minimize the conversation by just going, yeah. And then make him turn around and get on with his life and then just like, that should be enough to tell him that I'm not interested I don't know what to say, because it's awkward, I'm an awkward

interactor I'm an awkward interactor I just walk off Yeah, well we've seen the comments saying that you're just blunt as fuck I'm literally some guy yeah well we've seen the comments saying that you're just blunt as fuck we were walking down the road the other day with Liv and literally some guy some guy

we were walking down talking some guy walking never happened and he started holding Liv's hand as well

so he comes down and he literally just goes pulls out his airpod and just goes I'll follow you on Twitter

just walks on and I went yeah that's a that's a normal interaction with a human being isn't it i'll follow you on twitter you didn't say that though did he no but it was like that he was very aggressive yeah okay i had it i went he's definitely pointing at you oh actually you might have been living here i mean he's obviously me i didn't tell you about this i went home the other day After the holiday And like So you did get home Yeah I went home

And Yeah I went home Oh you mean home home Yeah home home Like up north And we went to like Middlesbrough No

Up the Fishburn And went to our local And we were just having a few drinks And then like You love drinking don't you You're a bit of a lad don't you Yeah do you know me And

See Thing is that... Please spit it out. Jesus, this is boring. Spit it out, man. Basically, someone went up to the fucking waiter there, or whatever, like, because it's a restaurant bit, and told him that I was friends with KSI.

Oh. No one I know, just, like, some kids from, like, the school. Is this your attempt to get KSI in the fucking... No, and then the guy came over, and he thought he said Kaisenat. Just... You don't look like Kaisenat. So the guy who was going up to him, he's like,

oh, I know you. And he has a bit of an accent. I have no idea what's going on. It's because they speak Georgian. You're a Macan. No, it's Italian. He was an Italian guy. Do that to him.

Pizzeria. Hi, Kai Sanat. Mamma mia. Hi, Kai Sanat. Hi, Kai Sanat. And then he was on about, then he was like, yeah, yeah, you're friends with the Asian guy. I'm like, what the fuck is this guy?

He's the guy that's was in Christ dreams in the right. Yeah, he's just there for it Yeah, probably is not like I don't know if you saw I was the Asian guy though Wait, they thought you were Ray Kaisysonat's friend? Yes. Really? That's crazy. That's what I was getting from you. I would have said yeah. But I was trying to speak because I don't know if you ever do this.

Back home we all stood like, my mate was just sat there doing like a fake laugh to try and encourage him and then he thought he was like killing it in the conversation so he just kept going

and my mate was like What did his fake laugh sound like? He was going and he probably thought he was laughing. He was doing the most fucking stupid laugh I've ever heard in my life. I would have i'd have just said yeah that's me mate have you ever done that someone else and just went along with it have you and that happened to you

yeah you know it happened to me no it hasn't i think not many people are as good looking as me so it's hard for um hard to get ben stokes everywhere that isn't That isn't a flex though It's ginger Ben Stokes is like Strawberry blonde I was joking by the way No It's not because I'm too good looking

It's because I have done that as well Yeah No The Ben Stokes one I got three drinks Off the old one They were

Going after me Jamie Vardy You got millions of views On TikTok So Yeah it's true They both pay out I suppose

No I've never got confused By anyone Wolverine no not even that Hugh Jackman oh I got confused for Simon Minter before when when we were in Norway when did I ask

brilliant oh yeah I could kind of sit yeah when I was I was with the group and obviously we was Chris Harry Bez so like a few of the Simon were there enough to be like oh

it looks enough like Mini Minter it's got to be Mini Min mentor because he's with them uh i got asked for a photo by these kids and then these other kids went up to him hello from deep side i am deep side you seem to get stressed overly stressed about a lot of things. We're not CEOing me, we're CEOing him. Why is it you get so stressed?

I'm not a CEOing me. Why is it you get so stressed? I'm going to deep side you today. Lewis, why is it that you get so stressed so quickly? That must have auto-corrected because I got a different message. Do you deal with stress poorly and why is that? Have you had a troubled upbringing with stress? What's going on?

Do you have child trauma? Were you touched as a child? Be honest. No, this doesn't have to go in. No? You sure? Why do you deal with stress so badly? You might have blocked it out of your mind.

I think it's because stress kind of spikes adrenaline, and he's already established that he fucking hates adrenaline. So he just gets progressively worse and worse. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just a man. An innocent man. Wow. Right now, what you're doing, you're procrastinating and you're trying to diverge away from the actual problem.

No, no. If you're not stressed, you're not doing enough. That is not true. That is not true. If I'm not stressed, that means I'm living pretty chill. And that means I'm not doing a stress test. I have such a stress-free life. Yeah, but your talent.

And it's so nice. I imagine, yeah. That's quite nice. You can have a stress-free life and still do a lot, mate. But you won't get there as fast if you don't... Get where?

I don't know. Because the end goal is happiness, right? That's where we want to be. Yeah. Yeah! So you're just forcing... Are about to cry forcing stress in and happiness stress is a byproduct of trying to get where you're going i don't think that's that's a really bad mentality to have guys if you if you organize things well or like what was what did we just say then i'd say yeah how much fucking hell johnny dami wait lewis is that why you overly stress over if you organise things well or, like, what did we just say then?

I'd say, yeah. How much coal, fucking hell, Johnny down me. Wait, Lewis, is that why you overly stress over things? Because if you're stressing in your head, you think you're working hard. I don't overly stress. I work best when I'm slammed because I'll be way more efficient.

Oh, sorry. Pause. I love being slammed. There you go. No, no, no, but if I'm not really busy, I will procrastinate. But if I'm not really busy I will procrastinate but if I'm slammed with work

I'll be extremely efficient so have you ever sat in a sauna on your own for 20 minutes no it's hot I have quite a stress free life

when I do have stresses they do get to me like even just little things like if I've got to just sort something out like paperwork

for something I get so annoyed that's probably because your tolerance is so low now yeah that's what I mean so I think I probably should have more stresses in my life

whereas his is probably so high I don't know how I've developed you only see a very small part of what I actually do you don't actually see

anything of what my job you don't have anything to do anymore what do you think my job is you're supposed to be the guy that comes up with video ideas

and production. And in this podcast here, you've just said, well, that's your idea. That's your idea. No, Lewis does a great job. Let's not take anything away from that. But I want to...

Whoa, whoa, whoa. We're only fucking messing, mate. Don't get deep. No, I want to go deep with Lewis. I want to go deep with Lewis here. So, Lewis... Of course, it's main character. Your stresses.

Where do you think your stress levels come from? Why can you not handle stress? When you chill, what do you think about? It's true. I... Work. You think about work when you're not working? That's weird.

All the time, yeah. You've got to compartmentalise that, man. Switch off when you're not doing it. He's not good at all. See, this is quite sad. Lewis... No, it's not. I think we need to treat you to a spa day. No, work is like work, work.

But I enjoy doing stuff. So when you was on holiday, did you just completely switch off? Because I did. Then I ended up missing it a bit. I don't think he did. He was in the chat room. That's what I mean. I'm not sure.

I was sorting a few bits and bobs. He was prepping Prodigy's sheet at that point, wasn't he? No, there was a few... No, I sent over a few things beforehand. There was... No, there's a few bits you tweak and change, but it's all right because I'm sat in a pool and you have a beard to do it with.

Now, I don't know. I'd get bored if you're doing now. I don't know. Oh, no. I don't know how you... I couldn't do what you do. Nothing. Like, see... like like tomorrow what

you're doing oh well we got the shoe but i'm gonna go to the gym play golf and then play footy on the night which i'll end the season do fucking know you live such an easy life that it's yours to fault i think the more you do this job as well the more you value your privacy yes I am big on that as well that's deep side yeah no it's not that deep

it's right I had this convo with someone the other day about our lives are very like most of our lives are either on the internet or people know about

people know that I've seen the inside of your bum I don't want people to see or know yeah true at all you've seen the inside

of his bum I've seen inside his body, yeah. Yeah, yeah, when I spread my arse cheeks. I don't know when that was. Probably Ireland. Oh yeah,

I've seen the inside of Tom's bum. I've seen a lot of Tom's body. I've seen his guts on the inside. I've seen a lot of his body. But yeah, that is a very good point

about the privacy. I am big on that. That's why I don't want some... Some people don't like... That's me. Some people don't give a shit about that stuff

and just want to live. I've got a mate who just fucked his job off and just went travelling and stuff. I rate that though. That's me Some people like Don't give a shit About that stuff And just want to live Like I've got a mate Who just like Fucked his job off And just went travelling And stuff I rate that though That's what I mean

That's really cool That's living That's the literal Definition of living In the moment Yeah The way I put it down Some people are like

Family driven Other people are like Career driven And you're just like Experience driven One of those is Incorrect or correct It's one that suits you

And that's philosophic Now that's the tea sis now you're getting it there you go do you know what deep side just got pretty deep that was actually

pretty philosophical well done guys now what are we talking about I don't even need my I'm in each other and then also remember two key things in life can we bring it back

to some arses guys hang on but there are two key things to remember in life if them toes aren't white that pussy ain't right that's the first thing and secondly what does that mean two in the. That's the first thing. And secondly,

What does that mean? Two in the pink, one in the stink. And on that note, Wait, what does the toes being white mean to do with anything? If them toes ain't white,

that pussy ain't right. That's just a word. Everyone knows that. What does that mean though? And if them toes are pink, that pussy stinks. What does the toes being white have to do with anything?

If them toes ain't white, that pussy ain't right. I'm missing two toenails from the half mouth. We're not on about you, you fucking idiot. Right, should we do some philosophy? You're the purple, mate.

So, just a little wet the whistle one. Can you sing me in? No. I hate when he does this. Here comes the news. Do, do, do, do. Lewis' news. Do, do, do, do.

Okay, go. He did what as the world burned? Summer of 64 CE. By the way, in the time that you disappeared, we've established that Lewis gets sent facts. Yeah. He doesn't research them himself. No, I do research.

That's not useless. I'm not lying. Some people have sent me facts and I've done research off the back of them. He doesn't even do his own work now. I do. Oi! Say it again.

Did you see they're releasing the Emu War film? Yes. Have you seen the trailer? No. You they're releasing the Emu War film? Yes. Have you seen the trailer? No. You haven't seen the trailer? Is it already out though, no? Is that not out? Do you know what?

I got so much shit off you for the Emu War. I thought it was like 2023. Wait, you haven't seen the trailer for it, mate. I can't believe I got so much shit off you for the Emu War. The trailer is unreal. It wasn't quite what you were saying. It was so real. It was right.

It wasn't quite what you were saying. Why are they making a blockbuster film on it? It's the next blockbuster. Mate, the CGI is unreal. I thought it was already out. That's crazy. Anyway, what's unreal. I thought it was really fun. Anyway, what's he called? Emu War.

He did what as the world burned? And then what was the next bit? Summer of 64. The prequel to Brian Adams. C.E. Nice. C.E. Rome was on fire. A fire broke out.

In what year? 64 C.E. C.E.? What's C.E.? I don't know. C.E. apparently. Isn't it BC or AD? Isn't CE what they have On like things to

Brand it? Do you know what it says CE on things? That's TM No no no It also says CE I know what I'm on about I'm right Lewis what is CE?

I don't know It was just ages ago Is it BC? I don't know what it was It was ages ago Rome was on fire I don't know if it was like Some bread burned or something But it was spreading quick wait what year did you say it was 64 ce

what the fuck is ce so it might be prior to jesus i think potentially bc before christ it doesn't matter because there was a gap in between just back in rome in it yeah but rome exists now. Who cares? It matters. Does it? Yeah. AD is after. Really? The year 64 CC, otherwise known as 64 AD. No, CE, you said, not CC.

CE, yeah. 64 AD. Okay, there you go. After death. Okay. Anyways. Whoa. I'm a domino.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Oh, he just typed in 64 CE and Google has AI now, and it said, on July the 18th, a fire started in the Circus Maximus Stadium in Rome. You're going to ruin my story.

Wait, has it hurt his talking? And burned for six days. Wait, has it hurt his talking? Just spoiler alert, like. Destroying 10 of the city's 14 districts. He was literally just about to tell this story. You're still spoiling it as we go on anyways

now there was a fire I think so anyways as that was going on the emperor the only guy who has true power who is the emperor

stop it Nero people scream scrambling and instead of taking action you know how to slow the fire or maybe escape the city

because he's the emperor you've got to get him safe instead he took a different action he went and had a wank okay that's it that's the story so is people dying and he went for a wank that's the story oh my god you're an idiot no you're being silly they probably knew that a lot of people blamed the fire, but historians say it was due to the weather, but Nero actually blamed the Christians.

You're a fucking idiot. Which is quite stupid. It's saying he took out his fiddle and played. Yeah, a famous instrument. Yeah, like a violin, mate, isn't it? Lewis, how have you got... How have you... Yeah, it was...

Nero, for the fuck... One historian said Nero was playing the fiddle whilst the city went up in flames. You... He didn't go for a wank, mate. You stupid, in flames. You didn't go for a wank, mate. You stupid, stupid boy. He didn't go for a wank. He was playing music.

You stupid boy. All right, so we're doing proper fuck now. Bear in mind, he researches these guys. Mate, how is that the first thing you think of? Right, next one. Have you seen the map of Europe, by the way? He's got producer face on again. Have you seen the map of Europe where different maps show different-

Or Ros lead to Rome Yeah I've seen it It's cool isn't it Very cool But then I went on Google and did Calais to Rome and it doesn't follow that road

He said when you're out this fact he's about to tell has made him do this If you're listening he opened his mouth I opened his mouth in a shocked face

No I swear to God when I read this this is the most this one's actually blown my mind more than anything and it's nothing crazy. Don't worry. Before you ask, there's not aliens or anything like that.

Or wanking emperors. Why would that be crazy? Why would that be crazy? You think that's crazy, but this one... But you don't. Wanking on fires. I know how I'm going to put the fire out with my cum. He did go for a wank.

He went for a wank. He paid his fiddle, mate. He didn't. He went for a wank. Stop. Stop it. Next. He probably shagged his, like, fucking

kid or something. Stop it. It's the 1800s. It's not, mate. It's 2020. And the headline of this is The World's Most Kissed Face. Oh, I've heard this one. He misses. 1800s. And what century is the 1800s? Your great-great-grandma.

Grandma Bowden. 19. Granny Bowden. Great-great-great-great- seven grandma Bowden 19 granny Bowden great-great-great-great granny Bowden so just another day in a French city you know how he knows this

by the way it's because he's been passed down his family generations granny Bowden it's another day in a French city right what city

Paris he's guessed he's guessed he's guessed name another one name another French city. Lorient. Is that a city?

Lorient. I don't think that's a city. What, FC Lorient? Tulsa. Who? What? Tulsa? That's in fucking America.

Fucking America, mate. Oklahoma. A body washes up a shore. In Paris, eh? On the river Seine. In what? In the river Seine. In the river.

I thought that, but you said that river was underneath. In the river. I thought that, but you said that river was underneath the ground. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was the hidden river under the ground. Why don't you say like Nice or Marseille?

It was Paris. So the guy's like, what a beautiful face. And he like, makes a cast of a face. Why are you laughing? What do you mean a cast?

He's looking at her and he's like, she looks peaceful. That's not what you said. You said she looks beautiful. No, I didn't say that. I'm saying that's what he said. You said a dead little girl looks beautiful.

Not little girl. Teenage. She was an adult. Then you changed it to peaceful. Teenage doesn't mean an adult. He does. He thought she looked zen. Not in a weird way.

Zen. She could have been 13, mate. She was dead. Zen and peaceful. And he's like, do you know what? I'm going to make a mould of her face. Normal thing to do for a doctor. So he lays plaster on it and he makes a nice face cast and he keeps it.

Right. Anyways, you know. He's not a medical doctor, surely. He's not a doctor. He's not a doctor. Time goes on. She gets buried away. Life moves on.

Did they find out who she was? No. Always a mystery. Medical science starts to advance and they're starting to educate people on stuff. Just not you. And, like, when they're doing all this sort of education, they're like, oh, we need someone who we can, like, practice on. Fuck off.

What do you mean? Practice what? What do you mean practice on? Like, you know, if I'm doing, like... CPR. CPR. Like, you need someone you can practice on, can't you? Are you going to tell me her face is the dummy face?

So they're like, who are we going to put on the dummy? You're joking. This guy's like, I've got a face. I've got loads of faces at my house. Give it to the company. They started using the mould of the dead teenage girl's face. That's what we breathe into. On the dummies.

And to this day, 300 million humans have kissed the face of a dead teenage girl who has never found where she came from. Well, they're not kissing it, though, are they? They're performing CPR. Each one of us here. I could see that being true. Is that really true? Each one of us here.

And if you listen to this, if you've ever done CPR, you have kissed the dead face of a French teenage girl from the 18th century. I want to see a picture of this. Is this really true? I can believe this. This is one of the most

believable ones you've said. You ready for this? This is the best one you've done. Because it probably is a fact. It's going to be that fish with hair. See, this is better. This is crazy, isn't it?

When I found this, I was like... If you pull up a fucking... Yeah, I swear to God, if this is anything but an actual accurate picture of this woman... It's going to be the alien. It's going to be the squirrel thing. Fucking pull the alien.

Yeah, the weasel. Wow, he's right. Damn. Well, I can't see. Fuck. So, everyone, if you've ever done CPR, look at the face, because that's a lass who drowned in the 18th century. I must admit, I've done CPR with different ones to that, I can't say fuck so everyone if you've ever done CPR look at the face cuz that's a lass who drowned in like the 80s century Yeah, that might they probably have probably got newer ones now, I don't know but some bit fucking scary actually

I do have an alien manuscript that I have we've done enough today I have an alien manuscript that's got like details of like foreign worlds and it's never been translated you know tap our onion

also someone chopped up and someone chopped up Einstein's grave just stop you made it to the end well done you if you haven't already hit that follow button why not tap it right now Just stop.