Back Side - 3: Theo's HUGE Announcement! The Sticky Door Dilemma & "I got ****** in a Dream!”

Episode Date: May 2, 2024

This week Theo is moved over achieving his dream. Lewis talks about his weird German experiences and Reev reveals the GREATEST feeling in the world...If you'd like to work with us, email the studio on [e-mail] by The Fellas Studios: https://fellasstudios.com/podcastsTheo:https://youtube.com/c/HiMalfoyhttps://youtube.com/c/TheoBakerVlogsOllie:https://youtube.com/c/reevhttps://youtube.com/c/OllieFletcherTom Garratt:https://www.youtube.com/@TomGarratt10 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to a new episode of Backside with me, Reeve, Theo Baker, Tom Garrett and Lewis Bowden. If you haven't already hit follow, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week. And if you want to see more Backside, catch us on YouTube, TikTok and Instagram, where all you have to do is search Backside. Let's get into it. 1-1-1. Everyone say 1-2 in the mic. 1-2, 1-2.

Un, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, siete. 1-2, 1-2. 1-1-1 one two they're all flying they're all good got in the car back it was fucking disgraceful you started though as well because i'm happy to have a truce of no farts but he he's not willing no no i i do not believe that for one second because both of you individually came to me and went do you know what what? The car later is going to stink. So I know that you were both planning to out-fart each other. This is the thing though.

I never used to be like this. In Liverpool, I used to hold them in out of politeness. You're saying that Theo brings the best out of you? Well, he brings the fart out of me. This is the weirdest thing. He said, I, man, have developed a tick-like.

So his tick-like. Yeah, we know what it is. Every time he farts, he has to say safety otherwise he's going to get beat up oh no that's not a tick that's what you did in school yeah no but now it's ingrained

in my brain oh I see no your tick is going ooh it was like 1am after every sentence Lester and you just go

safety that's how you know if I fart because if there's a smell and you haven't heard me say safety you know it's definitely not me that's not true that's not that is not true

because you were you were shitting your pants constantly when we were playing yeah sometimes I wish for safety one of the activities yesterday yeah but if it don't be weird

I start going and then Jai in the back he was doing it as well because I turned to him and I was like oh did you fart and he went no and then I asked you to

and then back to him and he was like oh okay he ate the most do you know what you know what the you know what the Matt he didn't have a three course meal

at the game he had a burger and a hot dog what they're at he didn't have a three course meal at the gate he had a burger and a hot dog beforehand did you actually I didn't even want I didn't even want the hot dog but I was like

fuck it also shall we address the elephant in the room because we haven't really done it yet what is that this is the first time the podcast is called backside

and purple light and purple light because every 10k subs on the channel something additional will be added to the set because you've been absolutely slight in the saying how shit the setting yeah correct fair play which we know so we've gone from it being all white to slightly purple also can i

just say lads number one podcast in the uk actually for two days two days straight which is hard it would have been a week straight one comedy charts sorry fellas pull your finger out and start treating the number one podcast under the studio and get us a set we're not even the number one podcast in the studio

we're number one podcast I don't even think we don't even need to address the fellas anymore we address Joe Rogan yeah that's the point he needs to hold that

yeah he sat looking at the charts today going it was backside Stephen Bartlett needs to hold that what because he'd be beating him as well

are you crying because that's what they do on Diary of the Year alright he needs to hold that shall we get into some stuff that

obviously seems to be a recurring theme in this podcast go on dreams yeah

because do you know what for the first I actually had one last time correct for the first time in my life i wrote down a dream i had the other day that was so vivid because i was like fuck i gotta save this for the pod i won't tell anyone so i'll tell you that's what i'm doing that's what don't cut me off i also had a vivid dream last night which i remember every single day it's a short one i've got a short one. Do you know why

you remember this? I've written it down as a paragraph by the way because it was so vibrant. When you're like extra tired and like a bit hallucinating

from driving until 2am you have these weird dreams that you'll remember. Yeah, probably right. Yeah, probably right. Ignore the context because it's a dream. Nothing makes sense.

No, but we know. No, no, no. We dissected this. No, of course. We need to get a dream expert on or that should be a pod we should do that we should do that oh yeah well i already know i already know what's going to happen at the end of this uh someone's gonna infer that i'm about to

get bummed but um right so basically it's me versus novak djokovic but we're playing on a court that's made of water oh so it're playing on a court that's made of water so it's a tennis court but it's made of water however in a dream we're using jet boots or some for some weird ability

you're standing on top of the water yeah yeah we can fly like it's not a normal it's still a bit plodgy yeah yeah so the ball bounces but if there's a wave

it like yeah when you stand on it diverts off the water and he's barring me right you're fully stood up on the water correct or you're submerged. Jesus. Jesus style.

We're just walking on water. Yeah, exactly that. Anyway, I've beaten him. I've beaten him with an underarm serve to win the entire... Underarm?

Yeah. Underarm serve to win the entire championship and then suddenly I'm flying about with a picture of Djokovic in my hand saying, have you seen this man? And then for some weird reason,

over the stereo in my mind, the song is playing. I get knocked down, but I get up again. You never gonna keep me down. But it's so weird, right? That I woke up and you know, like when you can't

get a song out of your head yeah i started singing the song i've woken up and i started singing i can't knock down but i can't is that the end of the dream that's the end of the dream i have a few questions for you yeah go ahead you know what that infers by the way i've had people who've had similar dreams to that and oh yeah you want to be bummed by a Glockovich dream Glockovich on a water bed my one was really short and brief but just weird

it made no sense I wonder where this is going no no no one bummed me that I can remember um it was I had a text

weird weird weird actually you told me you had a dream like that I did no that was another dream I had I'll tell that

but yesterday and I don't know what. I can't do it, you need to tell that. I'll tell that. But yesterday, and I don't know why because I don't think we spoke about him. I had a text from Randolph who I've met like once. Yeah. You had a text from him?

No, no. I've got his number. This is the dream, Theo. He didn't actually play Novak Djokovic. Yeah,

on a court full of water where we could float. I had a dream from Randolph saying, hi mate, no, it's really random, but I don't suppose you want to grab a Nando's on the 15th or 16th? Because I'll be up near Birmingham.

And then I remember in the dream checking my diary and going, oh, I'm actually filming the 15th, 16th down in London, but I'm free the 24th, 25th. And he went, oh, no, can do. And you woke up? That was it. Oh my god, that is weird.

What the fuck am I having dreams about Randall? Maybe that happened. Maybe that did happen. I don't have his number. We don't follow each other on anything.

I've met him once. That's a sign. Twice? No. That's a sign you need to go and nandle him. You need to go and nandle him three times.

I've met him like three times. Make your dreams reality. Something's going to happen. And I do really like him, but... Can you tell me the one that you randomly told me the other day? Okay, this one is strange. I can't remember it. Oh, right.

I didn't remember I got bombed by my father. No, no, basically, I had a vivid dream of me getting like... You can't set this up like this. Not in talking. No, no had a vivid dream of me getting like, not. You can't set this up like this. No, no, no. I remember, I don't remember the actual, this is so weird to explain. I don't remember it actually, I don't remember it happening. No, I don't, but like the dream. Yeah, the dream, I wasn't there.

I wasn't there getting bummed. I remember the dream was was I knew I'd just been like bummed and then I remember sitting there in my bed and my arse was

throbbing Jesus Christ it is true it wasn't enjoyable I promise you when you woke up I really didn't like it I didn't like it

when you woke up were you like oh a bit uncomfortable no no I woke up it's my first wet dream. Yeah, oh yeah. Do you remember the last episode

I said I had a wet dream? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Things have changed. I remember waking up and just being like, oh, what a day to wake up. And then I was like, what the hell?

And then I went and told my roommate, Willie, you met my roommate. I went and told him that and he was like, that wasn't a dream, Tommy. But yeah, so I basically had I can't remember exactly you told me you woke up

next to your roommate and then you had to change the story a bit here that's like almost as close to what happened with you in Bahrain right

no no but you're having sex dreams though so this is actually going back to episode one what am I doing by the way actually telling like thousands of people that I've got fucking...

It's vulnerability, man. I've got bummed in a dream. People appreciate being relatable. Well, people already think I'm dreaming that way. No, that's what I'm saying. People already presume you're dreaming about this anyways. That's true, actually. That is actually very true.

All dreams are hypothetical. Are they? Because now I'm questioning myself am I? well who cares that's fine though who cares bro is this thyroid the CEO right now

yeah this is get a couple more tears therapy side actually yeah I was gonna shall I have I got to create something for him

yeah well I wanted to say yeah yeah so I want to say off the back of the episode I thought your dreams are really weird so I asked Theo to start keeping back of the episode I thought your dreams are really weird so I asked Theo

to start keeping a dream journal daily yeah they're not actually that weird so who knows man Theo's got a dream and we're gonna hear it

ding shouldn't it be like shouldn't it be like Theo had a dream and he's gonna hear it that's what he said no no no you know the football

chant dreams can come true like Vichai had a dream I had a dream oh right yeah but I just thought I'd make a different one so you said it's original

that can't be copyrighted Theo had a dream ding and he dreamed three times monkey news oh tickles tickles through each ear

Theo had a dream so if I don't monkey news if I don't write it down then i don't remember it i found okay i'll be like wait for it to come in your head i'll be writing it down like like half asleep so i've got four of them so you like wake up in the middle and i go must write this for back side pretty much so you you have a dream every night pretty much no what I've realised is

no I don't I asked well Saturday um I dreamt that I had a Labrador but it was win

right that was it that's all I remember fucking hell yeah Sunday I dreamt this is a bit sad I can't lie but

you dreamed right you're right uh Sunday no Sunday I dreamt that Salah scored two against Everton

and I broke 100 points Monday was kind of cute and a bit embarrassed to say this actually in front of you is it about me yeah

oh but also it's a bit it's almost like a bit presumptuous that you're gonna even ask me Monday I was planning

Reeves best man speech oh that's nice that is sad yeah oh I know what that means as well I want to be one planning Reeves' best man speech. Oh, that's nice. That is sad. Yeah. Oh, I know what that means as well. I want to be one by Reeves. Yeah. Hey.

And then Tuesday, so this morning, we were in a car and we were getting a tour of Middlesbrough, like in the countryside, but Middlesbrough was the Seven Sisters Road. That makes a lot of sense though, because we were filming a hometown video yesterday. Oh, fuck yeah. But it was Seven Sisters, but in Middlesbrough was the seven sisters road um that makes a lot of sense though because we were filming a hometown video yesterday oh fuck yeah but it was seven sisters but in middlesbrough yeah and we were with you guys and you were the lead tour guide yeah so it's my hometown but it's merged all of our hometown yeah and then you know what that means we went through

like a rural village called tarring why is tarring i don't know but i and we all were going like in the car we're like tarring i find that i find that interesting that you dream about stuff that's recently happened whereas i dream about i tend to dream about stuff that just doesn't exist he's dreaming about the day he's just happy that means you're more you're more um you have more of an imagination And he's a bit dense You were just dreaming About the deer That you Yeah It's just

Recapping everything That happened Next week it'll be Fucking I had a dream That we filmed a live stream And then we filmed A podcast

It makes no sense Because I don't really Have a lot going up there It just hits my head Don't say that No but it's true It does hit I find it a struggle

To like I don't understand What you mean When you say this It's so weird When we do the quiz It's just emptiness It doesn't make sense what are you thinking right now i can't doubt how so you're so you you're honestly telling me that when you're answering a quiz question

you're cycling through answers yeah it's like like the other day when he said chel when he said bristol rovers as soon as he said bristol rovers i'm thinking of players i know who've played for bristol rovers yeah and then when he says the next team, you're piecing it together. It's not that hard. Oh man, I just... I don't believe that. That can't be true.

I was saying this to him because I can talk to a use now and in my head I'm thinking he's a bastard or like he's a knobhead. Why would you do that? I'm just saying, I can't say it.

You know, sometimes it's better to keep those intrusive thoughts to yourself, Luke. So do you not have intrusive thoughts? Oh no. If I say to you F1 drivers you immediately go in Leclerc

Hamilton Vettel Norris Jesus Christ everyone's different man so you legitimately can't say things out loud now

as I'm doing this I'm thinking of something completely different in my head that's fucking crazy can you imagine anything can you picture something like an elephant in roller skates I've got a house going on right there As I'm doing this, I'm thinking of something completely different in my head. That's fucking crazy. Can you imagine anything? Can you picture something?

Like an elephant in roller skates. I've got a house going on right there. No, I didn't ask for that. Can you create an elephant in your head now? Can you picture an elephant in roller skates now? I can. Go on, comfortably. Yeah.

There you go. Why does he look so good? Although, what I do do sometimes is, and usually when it's important, if someone's talking to me and telling me something important or explaining something, I will stare at them, stare at them, listen to the words, but I'm just looking at them and nothing's going in. And I'm saying nothing.

And then after two minutes, I'm sat there going, I don't have a clue what's just been said there even though I'm going yeah yeah that might be a focus issue though you know what

I do it with Chip all the time you talk to Chip and it would be like that's because he's thinking of something completely different how are you not hearing it I physically don't understand

but that's like he's not concentrating that's like a society technology overrun dopamine issue well sing us out of Theo's dream journal I've got sing us out of Theo's dream journal. I've got a...

Oh, that was Theo's dream. I've got a bit of an announcement, actually. I probably should have said it at the start of the video. Yeah, go on. Got a bit of an announcement, lads. You having a kid? Almost. Yeah.

You valued this on this... Just before you tell them, you valued this on this just before you tell them you valued this on the same level as having a child well yeah I cried okay fair enough I didn't cry

you cried oh I'm so ready for this to be something you shouldn't cry hang on before he says it as a person that knows do you want to have

a few guesses yeah so something he cried over right this is what Jodie gave him the last donut of a pound the same as of a pack.

The same as I finished mine. No, no, I reckon it's like a returning food item at McDonald's. They're bringing back the salsa chicken legend. That would make me cry. That is actually really... I like how you've gone for food as well. It's not going to be something that... And bad pie's doing another video with you. That is happening tomorrow, yeah, but that's not what I cried about. Oh.'s doing another video with you that is happening tomorrow

yeah but that's not what I cried about oh what would he cry over I'm so weird you said that it might be something big but for Theo like you're going to

cry over it's what's important to Theo is your hip something with his hip so he can play football again you've been cleared to kick a football

you've been cleared to play football no oh there we go then your boy is playing it's soccer age

oh yeah oh that's yeah are you really yeah that's actually your life is built up

explain explain why the reason why I cried when it happened because you're a woman so I didn't get asked I was in a I just said I'm doing it I'm... Because you're a winner. So I didn't get asked. I was in a competition. I just said I'm doing it.

I'm just turning up. I'm just turning up. I know the address. And I'm just going to say it. So am I. Yeah, we're all playing. I was part of a competition with 10 other YouTuber influencers. Right.

And the winner of the competition played in Soccer Aid. How'd you win? So there were six challenges. And within each challenge, one person would get two points. two people get one point so it's like loads different football challenge oh football challenge oh there's a video of it videos coming out soon and uh long story short the two people who made it out of the group had to do a penalty shootout and whoever won the penalty shootout played in soccer ages oh my god i've never been so this was the most nerve-wracking day of my life so people you know

that were there Thogden Leah Lewis Danny Aarons who was in the final with me me and Danny are we able to keep this in

by the way yeah yeah yeah because we get gassed out on Friday awesome so we had like so it was like

closing goal oh he's unreal was he he's unreal were you probably like trying to sweat Um, so we had like, so it was like, losing goal. Oh, he's unreal. Was it? He was unreal. Were you probably like trying to sweaty that really try hard? Well,

the challenges were really fucking hard to be honest. Some of them, like one of them was like closest to the flag on like the edge of the pitch. I got within a foot. Where, how far from? From about 60 meters. Oh, nice.

With my weak foot. I did the entire thing left footed did you yeah that's embarrassing for the others anyway so you beat everyone left footed to that's really embarrassing for everyone else you're all but the reason that you think that they weren't as good as they probably usually are the pressure yeah yeah the think about this moment everyone is playing to play in soccer aid right and for everyone that it means the world so the pressure and some people

were physically like shaking with nerves I could feel it the reason why I felt less pressure even though I wanted just as much was because of my left foot

I was like I'm not expected to win so I think that actually helps me in the challenges Danny was in the final with one challenge to go you got enough points I needed

the others I points but Danny feels like a guy that probably doesn't feel nerd have you seen him kick a football the reason why he got in the final

was on one of the challenges he hit crossbar and it bounced back so he got three points as a bonus point

no one else did that and he was the only person to get it in the top bins I saw that one and it was unreal so when he needed to he nailed it and that's why I'm in the top bins. I saw that one. And it was unreal.

So when he needed to, he nailed it. And that's got him in the final. Same with me. I hit crossbar and fucking nailed it. Last kick, yet to push it in the little goal to the left and the right. First one, it comes at me like knuckleballs on the ball launcher. It hits my knees. I'm like, oh my God.

I've left it down to my last kick to get me in the final. I've never felt nerves like it. Are you... Outside of the boot. Do they pay you? No, no, no. Which charity are you in? Are you in the final I've never felt nerves like it are you outside of the boot do they pay you no no no which charity are you in the

you're in the England team then rest of the world that's the world are you allowed to say who's in your team or is yeah that's the lineup coming out Friday

the people have been announced already okay why are you on the rest of the world because it's rest of the world because the other YouTuber playing is on England Philly no

Simon Mini Minta is it is he in Soccer Aid yeah why England Philly no Simon Mini Menta is it is he in soccer age yeah why is Philly not playing this year I don't know don't think so

there's usually more than one YouTuber isn't there yeah there's two now yeah there's two Simon on England me on West of the World so me and Simon

make the penalty shootout oh my god so me and Dan are in the final when I tell you I've never like you know when you think like oh Champions the final. When I tell you this, I've never, like, you know when you think like, oh,

Champions League final penalty, the pressure. I know it's not a Champions League final or World Cup final. But it's our Champions League final. But it's our Champions League final. Our World Cup final. And oh my God.

First penalty Danny takes, it's going top corner. I'm talking, he's rife with this. The keeper, I've never seen a saviour in my life. He's touched it onto the bar and we're just sitting there like,

what? Yeah, yeah. How many pens did you get? Five? Five. Five pens, yeah. How many did you score? So Danny misses first

and I think when that happened, I thought, he probably thinks, mate, how? Wait, so it's what, Danny, you, Danny, you, like, okay, yeah, yeah. In my head, I was like,

he must have thought, hey, I've just done like the best penalty I've ever taken in my life and I've never seen a save that good in my life. You'll see it and you hey I've just done like the best penalty I've ever taken in my life and he's I've never seen a save that good in my life you'll see it and you'll be like

oh my god second penalty he saves my penalty and I'm like it's two out of two oh no Danny missed his second sorry I score

so I go 1-0 up Danny then scores so it's 1-0 and then I score 2-1 Danny then misses over the bar again and I think if I've worked I might have missed it but basically it came down and then I score 2-1 Danny then misses over the bar again

and I think if I've worked I might have missed it but basically it came down to if I score this penalty I play in soccer aid bottom corner

goal and I'm like did you cry there? I felt very emotional yeah but I actually didn't the only time I cried

was when I I turned around I scored Danny I felt so bad was he good? he was so hard I turned around I saw Danny I felt so bad was he gutted he was so hurt I felt awful

I felt really awful someone's got to lose don't they take pleasure in it no because I'm not losing to his left foot no mercy man

you should have laughed at him if it wasn't me to win I wanted Danny to win right so and I knew how much he wanted it as well as me

so I felt really don't let's not play that game not one to win, I wanted Danny to win, right? So, and I knew how much he wanted it as well as me. So I felt really... Don't, let's not play that game. Not one single shred of you wanted Danny to win. If I didn't win. But did you want to lose at all? No.

So no part of you wanted him to win, so fuck him. No way. He's a lovely guy. Yeah, I love Danny, but wait,

all's fair in fucking, what's it? Yeah, it was, it was a great feeling. All's fair in soccer in soccer aid and more pressure

I've never felt pressure like that on a penalty and I said in the morning I said isn't it mad yeah that

someone might have the opportunity to take a penalty to put them in soccer aid it was me wow you woke up in the morning went to the mirror

and went today someone's going to have the opportunity to take a penalty for soccer aid no but I did say to him right here fucking hell I'll get involved Today, someone's going to have the opportunity to take a penalty for soccer. No, but I did say to come here.

Fucking hell. I'll get involved. Dirty bastard. People that have been announced. Oh, boys, man. Come on. What's your team as a manager? Usain Bolt, Hazard, Roberto Carlos.

That's sick. Yeah. England team, we've got Robbie Williams, Paddy McGuinness, Frank Lampard, David James, Seaman. They couldn't have two on the same team Jermaine Defoe Jack Wilshere Stephen Bartlett Samoa Farah

so can I ask you a question as someone who and this isn't me trying to be cool or whatever I wouldn't I don't know any of those people obviously I know everyone and I know soccer

I don't know but it doesn't interest me at all it's a good it's a good Sunday afternoon to watch it though. I always put it on

in the background. I think I've watched it once about 10 I watch it every year mate. I will love it. What I'm going to ask you is because I

don't really get it. Why are you so happy or so wanting to do it? Why? It's like the pinnacle. I was going to say

is this like your ultimate bucket list The pinnacle of what though? Just living out a football dream. why it's like the pinnacle I was going to say is this like your ultimate like bucket list the pinnacle of what though that's what just like charity just living out a football dream right

like the London Stadium my destiny like to feel like a footballer basically okay got ya and it's not just like you know how like Sidemen charity match right

all these YouTube but surely surely Wembley surely playing at Wembley is bigger than Soccer Aid yeah I can kind of get it no but Soccer Aid

in terms of Soccer Aid is bigger than playing in the Wembley Cup no not the Wembley is bigger than Soccer Aid do you I can kind of get a view through Soccer Aid is bigger than playing in the Wembley Cup no not the Wembley Cup but like the first time playing at Wembley football stadium

it's got a bit more prestige no but globally the coverage of Soccer Aid is just bigger than anything we've ever done before it's a profile thing

basically it's on TV as well so it's a profile thing yeah maybe I could be friends with Usain Bolt so you cried

because you're like I'm going to be so famous I can't wait to be on ITV yeah but it's not because you do like a training thing

like 340 yeah yeah yeah that bit is cool and like you just hang around with all these just get pissed through all the

ex-pros that would be class yeah like ask Usain Bolt sorry do your legs ache yeah how quick are you now

do your legs ache after 100, how quick are you now? Do your legs ache after 100m race? Yeah, tired legs. Do you know what I mean though? Is this your ultimate bucket list thing on your list? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's on one of my lists. He's number one on your list? Surely not. I promise you it was.

Ahead of children. Ahead of kids, marriage. Children don't get on a bucket list. Mate, I went to Socrates. I went to Socrates. What? That's my number one priority. That's not a bucket list thing to do.

Some people can't have them. Yeah, what are you on about? I don't think... I feel like bucket list is like doing activities or... Yeah, like having a child. Having and raising a child. No, but I feel like kids is like a given for everyone. No, bro.

No way. No, in terms of if you're capable to do it... No, some people never want children. Some people just never want children i've never had kids some people just never want children i also start a bucket list is like things that you want to see i just think it's skydiving yeah no like yeah because like for me like obviously yeah if you want kids you want kids a bucket list might be um i want to make a million dollars before i'm 60 or something or having a child is a is a uh standalone event in your life which anything else on a list would be

yeah like you're saying are you saying i want to go skydiving cool that's an event having a child cool that's an event i guess mine's more i guess i'm thinking more things you want to do before you die yeah that which is that's even more that's even more of an argument for what we said i know what one of your bucket list things is or at least it was when you were a kid that's even more of an argument for what we said I don't think you can ever wish you dead Lewis I know what one of your bucket list things is or at least it was

when you were a kid full head of hair he had that becoming a stuntman hell yeah baby he wanted to be a stuntman yeah quite ironic really isn't it

basically we went to a full guy premiere the other day and the first thing that came out was like man this is so weird

because when I was a kid I always wanted to be a stuntman yeah I think how terrible of a stuntman he'd be can you imagine if I pursued it as a kid then I would know

what did you say what did you say it's so interesting right that's another that's another four days holiday he's gone

oh he's out again if I pursued that instead of YouTube then I'd know how to fall properly no you as a stuntman would need a stuntman for when you're

yeah you'd have to get Jamie Vardy into Cut the Oos when we kids we went to Disneyland Paris right and we

you know they have the shows we sure saw Tarzan and I remember the guy who played Tarzan he must have been

on a rope but in my head I thought he wasn't on a rope he obviously just jumped he just flying across Disneyland basically jumped

from like the top of the stairs to like the bottom of the stairs in the entire arena. Shit, how far is that? Yeah, I think he might. Very far. Like 40 metres. Yeah.

I think he might have had a harness, yeah. Yeah, it is pretty cool. It is pretty cool. So when we got a climbing frame, we're lucky enough to get a climbing frame in the garden and me and my brother were just like, sorry. You're not beating the allegations, mate. Yeah, mate, don't try and play.

We were lucky enough to get a climbing frame. Mummy and Daddy scraped all of their pennies together and bought us the giant A7X 500 climbing frame that's 45 metres wide. That is the, you're shameless, mate. On the whole, you just sat there and gone, when we got home, we were lucky enough to get. I think we actually already had it.

To get a 5, a £5,000 climbing frame we were so lucky what actually happened is our next door neighbours Horatio got one of them I'm sorry

you cannot give it I don't have a fucking climbing frame in my house when I was growing up my surname you grew up playing golf

my surname is a merger of both my parents right you've just said we came home and daddy you were daddy erected a climbing frame in two days after watching tarzan at the age of 10 you can't talk anyway so me and my brother would just do like climbing frame and like hanging and shit

and i wanted to be a stuntman and i looked up but you didn't do any of the falling part so would you just climb just jump to the floor well you're actually triggering me right now because I still have a scarf and when I ran into a climbing frame I'm going to have to hold that unfortunately did you not see it

huh did you not see it no I can back up on that I was like four I just ran into it you were sticking out you know like Camp America

Camp America what's it called Team America something like that no Camp America Camp America they have it's when you can go and like be oh sorry I've always referenced in a film they have specific Camp America? Was it called Team America? No, Camp America. Camp America. What? It's when you can go and be... Oh, sorry.

Yeah. I've always referenced it in a film. They have specific stunt training Camp America stuff. And I was going to do that. That's sick. Yeah, that is... I also did that, actually. My mate did it.

He... Yeah. God. Yeah. No, it doesn't matter. What were you in a past life, Lewis, before social media, personally? Are you guys going to come

to the parade absolutely yeah what date is it 9th of June why did you only ask me and him down that's true actually

he didn't even open it up to the third I assumed he was coming see that what date is it Sunday 9th of June the what Sunday 9th of June

and it's where is that during just before the Euros oh Chelsea might be on holiday but if I'm not I'll come yeah if it's where? Is that June just before the Euros? Oh Chelsea Might be a holiday but if I'm not I'll come Yeah if it's Chelsea then no problem

Get tickets now it's all for UNICEF obviously Oh actually we could I could swing those in the box probably At Stamford Bridge Yeah how could that happen? Have you got that connection?

I just know people How would you do that? Interesting I just know people Don't worry You know Oh She can't have a box Huh? She can't have a You know, what did she... Oh, what?

She can't have a box. Huh? She can't have a box at Stamford Bridge. No. Oh, she knows someone who knows someone. We're not talking

about that, are we? No, she goes in it all the time. Who's she? She gets invited by like,

I don't know. I don't, to be honest, I don't really know, but I think we could. Yeah, potentially. That could be good.

Free booze, watch Theo fucking get injured again, that'll be fun. Yeah, first straight outside of the box, you better not.

Can you imagine us at the score? That would be maybe. Yeah, first straight outside the box. You better not. Can you imagine us at the score? That would be... Yeah, maybe. You should really. You're going to be better than most people. Yeah, I mean,

they are like retired, old footballers. Over there, no, over there in the footballers, you're going to be better than pretty much everyone there. You're better than fucking Robbie Williams. I don't know,

he's your hero. You better be. He's my hero. At football, we should say. Not at life. I saw, I went to the great in London Stadium

to see Noahah beck play but also that is weird what do you mean you went to see noah beck play well i went to see robbie williams at halftime but he was there no wait what you chose to go to soccer aid to see noah beck you don't you only get one and out right if you're like a usually a soccer aid is like you do one appearance and then you're no chunks of chunks oh unless they like you right like it's quite i went to see robbie williams at halftime and i saw him perform angels man did you speak to him no i was in the crowd and he was on the pitch singing but you said you went to see him at halftime yeah he performed at halftime so i saw him at halftime he played and then he performed at halftime no no he didn't

play he was like manager or something anyway going back to what I wanted to ask you, in a past life, what happened with you and this story that you were really keen to tell everyone about? Who? Past life. The orgy. Yeah, before you became a social media personality, Lewis,

what were you doing? Oh, yeah. He can't remember. The problem is he can't remember a time before he was disfavored do you want to find out about Lou yeah he's had so many jobs

this is what I mean this is what I mean you can't even just like around the block no no because we mentioned before

people didn't know I was in Bahrain but that wasn't even the good one I was in slow down this is your story time now

I was in Germany and we were talking about in the car but I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about slow down this is your story time now mate I was in Germany and we were talking about it in the car but I don't know if I'm able to talk about some of the stuff but there was like because of what is too explicit or what because I don't know because I signed so many documents when I worked at the station

I used to work at an armed forces station you signed loads of shit I've no idea I've got ministry of defence cards and shit I don't know like you just sign oh yeah it's probably best not to like but you can't talk about stuff outside the bases you've got a red dot on you what the fuck you can't talk about what happened in the base outside the base but hey on a podcast we can talk about it because in germany essentially you have a lot of people coming into this area young strapping lads so you know i i i think you can chat about whatever you want because there are like navy seals that

specifically talk about like taking down mid-lard and that shit so yeah that is true and I doubt they're ongoing things so obviously

like imagine there's just like tons of toms knocking about wanting to like shag about and that so like naturally you have like all these little

pop-up like fucking what's the term we could have brothels yeah I suppose that's a little more PG

natural prozzies and then yeah no oh no mate okay there's so much I'll just say it and we'll cut it out later so like in Germany

across the road from our base there was this like little house that you'd be able to go in and you pay like five euro to go in

and then you go up to this door and like this door it's like all like from the halfway down and there's a little hole in the bottom allegedly by the way I've like this door it's like all like from the halfway down and there's a little hole at the bottom

allegedly by the way I've not been in it's all like hey did you go in it no no no it's all I actually haven't I'm not

so Luke the way you're talking like you're staring out did you remember in this this is what's been told to me are you touching your eye because you're lying but it was the door was apparently

like sticky from halfway down with like just cum and shit oh cum and shit and there was a little peephole and if you look

through the peephole there was this like apparently like this overweight lady just like fucking playing with herself all day

and like people would pop in pay five euro just whine on the door and fucking leave oh why did you tell us that it's so weird no there's so much people pop in, pay five euros, just wham, wham, on the door, and fucking leave. Oh.

Why did you tell us that? It's so weird. No, there's so much stuff that happens. You're finished, yeah? Because like, it's weird,

like, it's like the higher you go up in the, the more you have to pay, and the fit they get, the more mental, like, it's like, do you know how rugby people, lads,

are a bit, like, out there? Yeah, yeah, it's sort of like it's like that so on the top floor

it's people doing shoeies of poo and vomit from other people's ass cracks which is the only thing that's where rugby lads do

how do you know that I've got loads of rugby friends how many jobs have you had then because I've had quite a few jobs he had three

at one time once yeah that was a small window but yeah you had three what were the three? I used to sit up, well, my first job,

I worked at the school and I used to set up goal posts and work on reception. Get you through setting up. Yeah, so it'd be like a rainy day, setting up five nets, I'd be smashing Bon Jovian.

Sorry, you got paid to put goal posts up? Yeah, and you go, oh, yeah, they're going to play. You just want to put the nets up. Someone gets paid to do that? If they hire the pitch where I was, yeah.

I only had a chair with three legs to like reach the goal. Also, that just obviously wasn't true because it wouldn't stand up. No, it is because it sinks into the ground and you sort of hold onto the goal post. They call those stools, mate. And then I worked at Stainsbury's Café

and then I worked at a fucking golf club cafe and then I worked at fucking golf club doing what picking up the range ball golf club driving show just driving about making tea and that oh as in like you were the buggy guy

you'd come up and go do you want a drink from the bag do you know when you're on the golf range and you're aiming at the guy in the buggy and you think it's all funny

it's not funny you shit yourself it's fucking awful you're there just like chilling just like thinking about what you're going to have tea it's like like it's fucking awful but you got barriers around you mate huh you got barriers yeah but you still still do you know what that barrier stuff's bullshit because yes there's barriers around it but the window's still smashed

at inside so i'm like well at some point it's came through on it how long was the guy working before you there it's like going to a lion enclosure and having like the glass we had to get rid of steve i'm not sure about the safety here yeah what for you or the because usually the lines yeah no but usually the lines the issue mate not the humans so they're trapping you in going oh'll fucking go I'm like I'll fucking go man yeah but it was good you're a well

well travelled man I made a big scientific discovery this week go on big scientific I'm talking mind blowing

I told someone about it I can't remember who I told oh it was one of the actually one of the scientists just spit it out and uh

you know bubble gum right you told the people on soccer right I said yeah not bumblegum who the hell is this weird it's not bumblegum congratulations

EMA oh my god we've got that fucking weirdo that's playing in it it's so bubblegum right you know the flavour

bubblegum yeah you know when you have bubblegum yeah do you know what the flavour is minty banana

what the fuck is if you eat a mint and then eat a banana is that what it is tastes like bubble gum it's actually minty banana yeah no it's called bubble gum and i feel like you banana for you to try what go on then i'll i'll give it a go i don't actually have it oh yeah right but. Right. But I should have bought it. So you didn't. Okay. Jesus Christ. So obviously, I was on the way to the gym once

last week and I had a tic-tac in. Not a tic-tac, a smint. And then I finished the smint. Oh my God, this isn't even a fact. He just happened to eat

banana and mint. No, no, no. But you've got to remember, he prefaced this with the start of I made a scientific discovery this week. This was actually something

And then I had banana after my smint and I was like smint yeah and then I was like whoa tastes like bubblegum

and then you know what's funny the people on soccer were like going like shit you know what that's actually true right what you were telling

these all these yeah when I was doing the photos and that and um everyone's standing around in a circle

putting a smint in and then taking a tube of banana and going... Everyone's grabbing... Oh, yeah, he does. If you're listening to this right now, have a mint

and have a banana and honestly, your mind will get blown. These fucking YouTubers, man. I'm just inspired. Are we seriously letting this guy go on the pitch? No, dude, honestly,

try it today. Please, I beg you, try it. His eyes are still red from crying. Mate, I promise you, try it. His eyes are still red from crying. Mate, I promise you, try it. Yeah, I will, mate. Yeah, I will, mate. So you're basically a scientist now, then?

I do make some weird scientific discoveries. Why don't you come up with... Like, if you eat chocolate, like plain chocolate, and then have, like, Walker's plain crisps, mainly dairy milk and Walker's plain crisps, sensational flavour. Yeah, it's like sweet and salty sensational flavour yeah it's like sweet and salty chocolate's really nice

it's like it's like having sweet and salty popcorn yeah it's like having nuts in chocolate yeah I'm not a fan of that

for me though well it's a very weird thing because you've just said you like that so but yeah honestly bubblegum is minty banana but these aren't

scientific discoveries you just stuck your plate okay sorry do you know what I've figured out? It's a common theme here. All scientific discoveries made by you

are food related. You just stuff your face with everything and then go, ooh, that tastes like that. Okay, well, if you don't think it's fucking science,

if I asked you a question yesterday, I said, what flavour is bubblegum? You'd be like, oh, I don't know, it's bubblegum flavour. And now I've just told you what the taste is.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The flavour is bubblegum. That's what the flavour is. Well, no. The constituent parts of whatever they make it up from. What flavour is vanilla? No, but you know what I mean. No, you know what i mean something

it's like what flavors uh fucking uh i don't know what flavors uh are you trying to sound like it'd be like a caramelized biscuit what i what i don't know yeah but that's an individual that's its own flavor though that's what the flavor Yeah, but some things taste like other things. You can have a surprise. Yeah, that is fair. Yeah. Of course, but bubblegum is the artificial flavour.

That is the flavour. It's minty banana. I don't think they made the taste of bubblegum by putting mints and bananas together, mate. I think that is just the sensation you get

in your mouth after having a mint with the banana mix. It's the same as citrus. Citrus is an individual flavour in itself, but it could be made up of lemon and lime.

Well, multiple different, yeah, exactly. So citrus flavour can be different based on whether or not Orange is a citrus spirit. Yeah, that's true.

Great, great. But yeah, no, seriously, try it. Honestly, I want you to try it. I won't be trying that, mate. Next episode, I'll bring it in and we'll you were about to listen to the number one

UK podcast minty banana is the shittiest podcast ever you know what's crazy as well people will comment down below who have just tried it right now and be like shit he's right

I'm not saying you're wrong I'm saying the flavour can taste similar yeah but that doesn't make it bubblegum it's just

otherwise they'd call it mint banana. Yeah, they would. Who's going to be like, oh, yeah, let me get a mint banana flavour. That sounds crap. But if you call it bubblegum... People have... Okay, yeah.

So what you've figured out is the marketing scheme behind mint banana is actually still... Right, okay. I know why it's called bubblegum, right? Do you know what? Maybe you're right. It's gum you can blow bubbles with.

Yeah, crazy. That's not a flavour, though. Is that another... That's originally why it was called bubblegum right do you know what maybe you're right it's gum you can blow bubbles with yeah crazy that's not a flavour though that's the first that's originally why it was called bubblegum yeah but that's the bubblegum flavoured chewies are not

chewies alright fine you're fucking weird mate anyway I'm taking a big breath I know there's a prep segment here for greatest things

or greatest feelings in the world I actually think I've got the big breath. I know there's a prep segment here for greatest things or greatest feelings in the world. I actually think I've got the best one. I guarantee no one has got mine. Better one than mine. So go on then. Mine's better. Use it all. Ghost poo wipes.

That's not a feeling. That's not a feeling. That's not a feeling. Nah, nah, nah. You're not the euphoric feeling. Yeah, the feeling after ghost poo where you just go, fuck. No, no.

That's more emotional. Ghost poos, ghost. No, no. That's more emotional. Ghosties are quality, but... That's like... Yeah, I don't feel this... Like... Is that better than like a last minute winner? No. The best feeling in the world

is when you are so desperate for a wee that you think... That is up there. And then you go for a wee. Yeah, and you sit there. Oh, my... That is definitely up there. That was one of mine.

That's similar though, no? No, because that's the feeling. Oh. Okay. Yours is just, oh, get in. I don't even have to walk. See ya.

It might sound a bit weird, but you know when you wake up in the morning and you need a number one and a number two, you sit in the toilet and it all comes flooding out and it's like this bit, oh, Samuel. Not that one.

I've never, that's not as good as having a piss when you really need one it's fucking just empty and everything what's your one oh right so mine's very

right so do you know when like you know when like it sounds weird so do you know what you're like you're foreskin you might not

have experienced this I probably haven't go on no no no explain this to me because this is actually like news so like sometimes

you might have like like if you've been with a lass or news. So like sometimes you might have like, like if you've been with a lass or your girlfriend or whatever, you might have like one of their long hairs tangled around your foreskin. That is nice. And then you find it, you're like, what's this tiny hair?

Or if you're also... Sometimes you're in your bum crack and you pull it out of your bum crack. But then you pull it and it's like, oh. Yeah, that is... But aren't you not scared it's going to like slice your willy open?

No, it's nice. It's like a nice little piece of hair. It's like, Oh yeah. That is, aren't you not scared? It's going to slice your willy. Oh no, it's nice. It's like a nice little piece of hair. It's like a paper cut in it. Nah, you can't recreate the feeling, but it's just like, you find a little thing. It's like,

Oh, that is very right. That is also very right. Yeah. And it's very, do you know why it's so good? It's rare. You can't recreate it.

It just happens. And it's a nice morning surprise. And sometimes, sometimes, yeah, it's very good. And sometimes you'll wash, you'll shower, you'll change boxes. And it's a nice morning surprise. And sometimes, sometimes, yeah, it's very good. And sometimes you'll wash, you'll shower,

you'll change boxes. And the next day you find one again. Yeah. It's just great. But then does it remind you how much you love her and you miss her? Yeah. Her? She?

Over his head. I think mine's better. Now I'm going to need you all to close your eyes. Close your eyes. I'm going to need you all to close your eyes close your eyes are you just going to do ASMR everyone close your eyes and just imagine this and if you're watching this as well close your eyes and just imagine this

you wake up middle to end of May middle to end of May you wake up about 11 o'clock the sun the sun yeah about 10 can you just

let me tell imagine this I was getting in the Zolder imagine having an audible book and it fucking you're like

I had my eyes closed and it was just like what 11 not 8 for High Rocks what are you doing into an argument

Jesus just picturing his stupid head but it's 11 o'clock argument. I don't like it. Jesus. Just picturing his stupid head butting into my imagination. The sun's not rising at 11 o'clock, does it? I didn't say that. Start again. Start again.

Shut up. How about you just shut up and let someone else be the main character? 8 a.m. Okay. Tick, tick, tick. It's the middle to end of May. You wake up.

The sun is shining and you look out the window and there's not a cloud in the sky and you know full well you've organized a day you three of your pals are heading down to the pub for half 12 because there's an early kickoff game on right but not only that after that game there's three o'clock games. And it's a full fixture. Not only that, there's a 5.30 game. And not only that, there's an eight o'clock game.

Eight o'clock. And not only that, there's racing from 12 till eight. And not only that. And not only that. Every betting app is back on an extra boost. And not only that two more lads have just confirmed now the feeling is

well keep your eyes closed sorry sorry now you get to the pub it's about five past twelve they've set up the telly outside you can watch the game outside with the sun beaming down

you go to the bar you get your pint you sit down that first sip is the best feeling in the world yes and then you look at each other and go then you go should we order one in no uh okay that's it why are you crying how good is that feeling it was nice I still think dick hair is nicer

but do you know what I don't think he's registered any of that I think he's just gone to sleep for about two

and a half minutes I just woke up and I'm like so let us know in the comments what feeling is the best there and I also

oh another good feeling and this you're going to think I'm weird maybe it's not a feeling when oh god

when a man loves a woman and I'm the guy sitting do you know when sometimes you scratch like

what oh god this is going to you want to do it or not yeah do it when you self

Dutch oven yourself that do it when you self Dutch oven yourself that's outrageous when you self that is not a good feeling is that figure you're at no when you fall on your covers and fucking release it

to your own nose I love it so much I don't think that's a great feeling I can't I can't compare that don't you love the smell of your own farts

nah sometimes they're too bad. Don't get too... Oh, do you know what is good, Si? The Gooch smell. No. Okay, never mind. You'll fart in the morning and you'll go...

He's like... Ah, what a wonderful day, boys! Ah, what a wonderful day, boys. Ah. Oh, you're a wonderful... I've got to start. I've got to start. I've got a mate, right, who, if you fart,

it'll say from here to that camera, he'll hear you fart, he'll run over and sweep it up. That is outrageous. That is not... And his name's Joel, so if you're watching this, Joel, I'm calling you out

he's a fire sniffer he's a fire sniffer he'll kill you he was mouth breathing live and direct in the car last night he was asleep in the car and you could just hear it

coming in and out of his mouth I walk up with you're like snoring from your mouth can I say I think I woke up with tongue burn from mouth breathing this morning. Tongue burn. I was like, I think my mouth got so dry,

it actually started to like, slice the tongue open. And it was like, even after I drank, nothing could quench a certain spot of my tongue because it was so fucked up. Wait, is it... Is it quench? Yeah, quench. As in is it quench? Yeah, quench.

As in like quench your thirst. Fucking hell. I always thought it was clench. That's another word. That's another word. That's like that. Yeah, I thought it meant

all the first, like, clench my thirst. You know, another good feeling in the world. Jesus Christ. You know when you wake up in the morning and you're like,

this is really warm and you're really cold and you get that first warm hug. I'm the other way around. I'm always, you are, you're. I tell you tell you what man there's a lot of people that don't wake up next to people that watch this show so how are they gonna now i could have whoa lost single bachelors you say they're all dirty virgins who actually i've just thought of a good one you know when you semi don't have uh any responsibilities in the day and then you just accidentally fall off for a little nap?

Oh, a nap. A nap at any time is amazing. The first part of that nap where you decide, I can actually just nap here. Or when you wake up, when you're absolutely knackered, you have the nap and you wake up and you've got dribble everywhere and you wake up and you just go, oh, that's amazing.

I feel amazing. Really? No, you know what I'm feeling after like 10 bicep curls? Nah, nah. How ugly are you in the morning? What? Like, he's done about that,

like, because when I, because like this thing, when I wake up, I look at myself and even I'm like fucking hell. Can you even, it's like Jesus, I'm fucking horrendous.

I'm calling cap on that. There's no way you walk to the mirror and go. Nah, not because I'm, oh, you'm fucking horrendous. I'm calling cap on that. There's no way you walk to the mirror and go... No, not because I've got... Oh, you look fucking... No, I'm just saying, right? Oh, God. Oh, God.

This is what I'm hearing. Jesus. I don't have any eyes. I was like this. And I don't have a chin. I was like... Wait, why is it? Apparently, Marty wakes up and goes...

I've got My lips are dry My breath stinks I've got shit everywhere I've got my Invisalign Look, why is it like I keep rambling And I'm like, my girlfriend's there Like fuck me

Why do you look so weird without your glasses? I look like shit It's because you're just so used to seeing him with them No, I didn't need glasses like proper But I was like, I'm going to wear them it's because his it's because his eyes strained so much

as soon as he takes them off he pulls a little bit one eye doesn't pull is like weird it's like when I wake up in the morning I close this eye so I can read

because this one pulls and holds me back you've got to think glasses are a massive part of his beaches though you'd be lucky if I shaved my beard you'd be like

what the fuck? Oh yeah, that would be weird. So you wake up, and the first thing to do to find your glasses is you go... I don't know where I'm at. I'm firing. I won't wear my glasses for a bit, so I'll just walk around like this.

Add a bit of excitement to the morning. No, because I can't see as well. It's closed one eye. So you see better if you close one eye. Yeah, this one's holding me back. I may as well get as well. It's close one eye. So you see better if you close one eye? Yeah, this one's holding me back. I may as well get it out. It's like fucking nothing. Get it out.

You should get a glass eye for backside. Have you ever seen that thing? We need to get a prostate exam. You've seen Bisping's one. People with one eye, right? People with one eye, yeah? What do they see? What do they see?

Just one half a field of vision. Well, do this. No. Yes. No, because you see black there. You see darkness, right? Yes, but this is the field of vision. do this what no yes no because you see black there you see darkness right yes but this is the field of vision

I'll get it yeah but they don't see anything you don't see anything you don't see black you don't see anything you say you see nothing but what's nothing

no but you said he had one eye so when you close one eye right you can't see like darkness in your left eye you only see this

right yeah but if you close both then you can see darkness yeah because we have optic nerves. Do you? That's mental. No, it's not.

It's because there's other light coming in and it's like, but that's what it is. There's still light coming into your eyes. When you close one eye, you can't see out of the eye. Do you know why? Because all you see,

oh my God, this is mental. When you close two, you can see darkness. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, because your other eye is seeing everything in your field of vision and then your brain assimilates what is

remaining it's not like it's going alright this is working out what you're seeing based off one eye do you know your eyes look up when you close them have you ever tried to go to sleep have you ever had it when you're so tired when you're so tired yeah

I reckon when Lewis finishes his day he's like right you've done the work lads Have you ever tried to go to sleep? Have you ever had it when you're so tired? When you're so tired, yeah, and you are really... I reckon when Lewis finishes his day, he's like, right, you've done the work, lads. He just flicks him to the back of his head. He's a fucking idiot. When you're so tired and you're going to sleep, you can feel your eyes going backwards. What is he on a bat here?

Yeah, but yes, I can. Can you shove like a ball or falling, right? I can do one. Isn't it weird? I don't like doing it. I don't like it, but there's like a hole for the ball.

Right, I think that's it. Right, guys. Anyway, so that's the end of the show. Let us know if you roll your eyes back at night. We didn't even do the best thing on this prep sheet either. What was that?

Which was like death of wife for power of the force. Okay, well, we'll save that we'll save that for next week stay tuned for the greatest chat next week make sure you rate us

really does help us out actually if you've listened to Spotify rate us on Spotify and Apple Podcasts five stars it really does help us out make sure you're subscribing

because every 10k subscribers we are going to improve the shit set that you keep slating 30k subs we're getting a prostate exam together live on the pod what? you agreed to that

I said I'd get a you can't do it live you can't I did it on Idiot Brother you just get the curtain mate you put it in the chat and was like

oh yeah wait so you two are going to you two are going to get fingered that side and we're not even going to oh don't we'll have a hole in the curtain

and we'll like do the pod okay if this how many likes did the last podcast get on YouTube? Have a look. I think we need a lot of... It's got to be 5 or 10k minimum. Yeah, surely.

If we get to have a live prostate... Yeah, that's a lot. That's a lot. ...in this curtain whilst doing our fingers. If we get 10,000 likes on this podcast, because that won't happen on YouTube. And also to find a doctor that's, you know... Willing to do it.

Yeah, willing to put his finger up your arm. No, no, it's because... No, it's not... Why don't we get your doctor from Sainsbury's? No, because it does normalise it. also to find a doctor that's you know willing to do yeah willing to put his finger up your arse no no it's because no it's not it's not why don't we get your doctor from Sainsbury's

no because it does normalise it it normalises everyone should get your prostate yeah I agree obviously we're not of the age

where you should what if he turns out he's got prostate cancer no he's not he's not a fan of him yeah so thanksfully because we got 10k likes guys we've discovered

that Tom has prostate cancer 10k likes it should be 300k views or Tom has prostate cancer. Fucking great. 10K likes. It should be fucking 300K views or something on the pod as well because... Yeah, if we get 200,000 views on the pod

and 10K likes, we will get a live prostate exam. And have our heads peeking through. Yeah, so share it around. 150,000 views. Fucking hell, we will... Share it around.

That's the only way we're going to get it. 200, 200. 200, yeah. 250,000 views and 10,000 likes, we will get a live prostate exam. Well, exactly when I do that, aren't we? Don't look after your health. Right, 200. 200, yeah. 250,000 views and 10,000 likes, we will get a live prostate exam. Well, exactly what I'm doing then, aren't we?

You want to look after your health. Right, okay. See you later. Bye, guys. You made it to the end. Well done, you. If you haven't already hit that follow button, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week.

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