Back Side - Angry Ginge WINS I'm a Celeb, Beavo Calls Out Lewis & Theo RAGES Again!

Episode Date: December 11, 2025

If you'd like to work with us, email the studio on [e-mail] by The Fellas Studios: https://fellasstudios.com/podcastsTheo:https://youtube.com/c/HiMalfoyhttps://youtube.com/c/TheoBakerVlogsOllie:https://youtube.com/c/reevhttps://youtube.com/c/OllieFletcherTom Garratt:https://www.youtube.com/@TomGarratt10Lewis:https://www.youtube.com/@lewisbowden1If you'd like to work with us, email the studio on [e-mail] by The Fellas Studios: https://fellasstudios.com/podcastsTheo:https://youtube.com/c/HiMalfoyhttps://youtube.com/c/TheoBakerVlogsOllie:https://youtube.com/c/reevhttps://youtube.com/c/OllieFletcherTom Garratt:https://www.youtube.com/@TomGarratt10Lewis Bowden:https://www.youtube.com/@lewisbowden1 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to a new episode of Backside with me, Reeve, Theo Baker, Tom Garrett and Lewis Bowden. If you haven't already hit follow, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week? And if you want to see more backside, catch us on YouTube, TikTok and Instagram where all you have to do is search backside. Let's get into it. Well, I don't think he'll fight me. I think he's a little, I think he's a bit of a loser, like and a bit sad. Jake Paul? Was he? Was it Johnny every fight?

Why? It's in case you either wee or spunk yourself during the fight. The fastest time to eat three minutes points. Yes! Do it! He's got mint fire tip for me! Get that fucking down you, son! Get it in your cup, you're gonna fucking do it! Hey, you're gonna do it!

You're gonna do it! Gaslighting again, oh my! Gaslighting again! And now all you do is just gaslight and have a go at me for nothing. You're gaslighting me. A lot of you might get your wish of me leaving the shows because I can't work with someone who keeps doing this to me. Welcome back!

Welcome back. Wait, I know, wait, I've not from the... You said it'll take you three minutes. We've got another 50 minutes. We've got to do a prediction show. I know, but don't worry about it, me. You should arrive late today. Yeah.

We weren't. And you should have arrived prepped. Yeah. Why'd you only ever do the quiz prep as you sit in? Because Will actually told me they need a quiz this week. We do it every week. Yeah. He doesn't use his brain.

And that's the reason you left. Uh-huh. I don't know how he does it, though. That's the reason you left. Yeah. Is this your Guinness Book of World Records Challenge? No, do you go emulate the dog down? That's not yet.

No, I know. We do have to kick off the show, apparently, by addressing what Danny and Tennessee have said on punch it. What did they say, Reeve? Who's that? Well, you'll find out in a second, Lou. They have challenged us to hit 10K reviews on Spotify before they do. Interesting. We're in a race to 10K review.

Well, challenge rejected. How about that? How about all that? And apparently who ever hit this? Oh, whoa, whoa, what the fuck? Let me check the other one. Oh, that as well. Do you do it as well?

Yeah, but do you not want to see them do a forfeit? I mean, we could easily get to take it. I don't watch that shit. New, Reid. What forfeit do you want to see them to do? Don't know, we can think about it. How about the forfeit is that they just stop recording the podcast. It was all the paper.

Why do people like comparing us to other shows? We're in our own fucking lane boy. What lanes that? The fucking shit, like, really? Sorry, I don't know. It's not really unnecessary. Are you high? I've hit so much Greg.

No, he's been blazing again, mate. You had Gregs for lunch? All right. I had a pepperoni pizza, a whole baguette, and a festival beer, and a whole split of... Oh, oh, just now? Aye. Are you serious?

I hope this Guinness World Record isn't eaten, because I'm going to be sick. Oh. I did my diet again. I, you're in a diet. But you have two days, by the way. No, today, it's like today. Is diet eating a fuck a ton of chocolate?

No, no, the diet is make better choices, eat less shit, and try and go a little bit keto. What? That cannot be true. You're not on keto, mate. You had toast this morning and you had a fucking tortilla wrap. How's that keto? What the four?

Less carbs. And also, I'm trying to make better choices. I'm trying to eat more fruit. Yeah, that's fine. That's understandable. But don't say you're going keto when you've had carbs with every minute. Well, I need a little bit of carb. He's had two meals and both have had calves in.

Now, I'm trying. Oh. You're not though? Are we like... That's actually the opposite. Are you really not? I have three of fear for you. I had three eggs scrambled eggs on a small sourdough slide.

Yeah, but that isn't keto. You miss... Yeah, I know. Not that kid. Just reducing the amount of carbs I'm having... And fatty chocolate. Yeah, but that's not hard. Would you eat in a fuck ton, is it? I'm just trying to make better choices, man, if I'm being honest. I realised when I hit 88 on the scales, I was like, damn, Dan.

You really let yourself go. What do you usually weigh? Like, fighting weights about 84. Fine. Yeah, but also I've not gained any muscle. So if I'm not gained muscle, then I've gained fat. I see. Can I be honest?

Go on, bro. I think you best just go enough to like sign up for another Iron Man to force your exercise. Because the diet's not going to come down. Reeve, Lewis, I can't lie. You actually hit some straight facts there, by the way. Yeah, the diet's not going down. Luckily half the Iron Man, I was fine because I had the marathon. But now because I got niche.

And you're just still eating the same that you always did. It's impossible for you to eat less because because you're a little piggy deep down. My tummy's grown. So like, obviously. That's what happens. Yeah. But it eats impressive amounts of chocolate.

How do you know? Your tummy grows. So that's why bigger people can eat more food because the tummy's getting better. But it does shrink the less you eat, though. Yeah, but it's expected. Unless, you see, I've been eating the same. Yeah.

Oh, I had such an image. By the way, you had three eggs on one small slice. That's a lot of egg to bread. I don't believe you had one. Yeah, I did. I think the small slice was trying to exaggerate out here. And I said to myself, seeing what type of bread it is doesn't help your argument.

Yeah, you just sound like a twat. No, because three eggs, three eggs scrambles is enough to, every bite is enough eggs. Oh, three scrambled eggs. Oh, that's nothing to be fair. Yeah. It's a good ratio. Yeah.

Do you know what I mean? I'll ratio you in a minute. So watch this space, guys, in one month's time. How about the fourth of them for Danny and Tennessee is? They have to do, like, do you know, like, super fat versus super skinny? They have to, like, live on feels die for a week. Oh, that's a good. Oh no. Hey, in other news, congratulations to Angu G.

Yeah. Winner, winner, chicken dinner, winner, winner, chicken dinner. I'm annoyed I didn't put money on it. I said he would. Yeah, he was just like the reach, you can't compete with it if you're from East Enders and that. Yeah. But I don't know, well, yeah. Yeah, but I think you're underestimating the power of like society.

I didn't think he'd win. I thought, I thought, you get big votes from the people who know him and the people who are older who don't know him. who don't know and will take a lichen to him and before for him. See, I thought, I thought maybe they'd find him annoying, but he came across really well, didn't it? Do you know, I'm really glad that Tom guy got into the final, I thought he was class. He came across so well, he was so kind. Is that the guy who talks, Paul? Yeah.

With the voice, with the words and stuff. Yes, darling. Yeah, literally exactly that, but have you seen him when he does, like, other accents? What accents? Oh, is it, isn't it? Oh, bitch! He's like, all right, girl. And it's so weird, but it's amazing.

Oh, girl. Have you not watch it? We could be on for a YouTube back-to-back dub it. By the way, how the fuck is dancing with the stars still going on? Should you come dancing? No, I don't think George, my mom's telling me George isn't going to win. No, I think... Lewis is out now.

Lewis got... Favorite one out. And he was by far and away the best dancer of the... Is that me George in the final now? I think semi-final. Bloody hell. But like, Amber... Going on for seven months?

No, it hasn't. Yeah, it goes on for so long, man. Too too much. You're dragging it out like, like. It's because it's once a week, whereas I'm a step is like six days a week, right? No, no fair. When he's eating chocolate kick. What I'm like, well, he saw him that day.

You were saying he needs, like, he can't, he can't wait to be back in YouTube videos because he feels like he's being held back in terms of like, he's being able to express. He didn't really do, he didn't really do much in the recording video. Like, you know, because it's TV, they always cut down loads and they always like try and dumb you down a little, but he wouldn't be, like, funny again. Oh, fuck, kill myself. Yeah. Well, and also, I know what you mean.

I do know what he mean. We got, um, we got robbed from our SS who does. wins spot as well fucking livid oh cole's on on it s who dares wins which is class have you not have you not seen this what col's on he's odd s s who dares wins over you it was like it's been on it as well isn't he literally i don't know who's the man you need to get yourself a better agent they are yeah literally yeah said come on man fix up what the fuck's your agent dude yeah so much and also a lot for you as well is he yeah oh you try for us for us for us for you stand it a little bit yeah i thought he's just your mate no no no he's good stuff

I thought Darrell was your agent. They worked together. Yeah. They're the same company. See what he does that phase sometimes. When he deems that you've said something stupid, he'll do this. Wait, how often is this? Who?

Can everyone do the confers right now? Is it once a year? Is it once a year? How is it once a year? Probably. I'd like to be on it next year, please. Can I go on it, please? I know I'm not thinking of it.

I'll do good stuff like. I'll do anything. Lou, what about your poor little thing? What if they actually, what if SS who dares win? asked the villain. I'd have to be in character the entire time. Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa! What?

What? What? What? The fuck? Oh my God, mate. What the hell? I'd sneak on as the villain. He's in Australia at the moment. No, I'd sneak on as the villain. He's been spotted in Italy. Yeah, shut up. Fuck off.

With Mussolini. What are you on about, mate? What are you doing here? Why is you with a fucking... You're like the guy that goes, oh yeah, Santa's not real. Shut up. Shut up. Fucking up.

It's funny, isn't it? He's still alive, technically. I think Miscelline is to live, isn't he? Are you... What? Well, he must be if he's been seen with the villain. Oh, right, yeah. No, the villain...

No, the villain can time travel, is what the word. Oh, my God, get him... You should get him in, like, an old suit. We should, like, Photoshop him into, like, the original pitch-tize shore with Simple Simon. You know, like, the old photos back the day about... You did a podcast with Simple Simon. Who? He was a good guy, actually.

You know how simple Simon is, like, called on OnlyFans now. He's not only fans now. Hi, dicker. Should we talk about... Should we talk about Mr. Beaver? Mr. Beaver. Oh, yeah. International Celebrity Bevo called me.

Have you seen he's put his mom on? Are there? I don't believe... I don't think it's his mom. I think it's probably... Is he step-mom? I imagine... I just presumed it's like an older lass

who he's promoting as his mom. Like a porn step-mom or an actual. Well, he's a fucking freak. We know that. Proper freak. Or can stop laughing at... What's your latest... Hi, Mom, get your fucking mensge out.

Well, Bevo, I just want to make clear. Yeah, Bevo doesn't know who I am. He doesn't know who he is, but he knows who he supports, what colour hat he wears, he's got glasses, he's 5'11, he's an exact weight, but I don't know who he is. He doesn't know who I am, guys, I promise. Did he say you wear a blue P4.5? No, what it is, it was like he was streaming to his five friends

or whatever he does, and he gets them to clip it and post it, and he just keeps calling random people out. He called out Max Kedar. Yeah, yeah, come. I don't know what he's doing, but then he called me out again. But, like, the thing is, like you're best with the villain

it's not a game yeah also really simply you are a bigger draw than him this is what this is what I said and he's like

well that's what he said there was another clip where it's like apparently Lewis said he's too big for you and he's like

yeah tell him fuck off Newcastle fan like oh burn he's realistically he's actually like

such a fucking like weirdo sounds like he's living rent free in your head though yeah he's got me he's an international

celebrity I would no I would love to fight but he's trying to get like a little tap in fight

against someone who's not boxed before. Is that even going to still continue all the boxing and all that? And he, yeah, yeah. I've got, I'm going to chat with mams this week, so I'm just started training again. And I'm hoping to fight by the end of next year.

Jake's next week, right? Yeah. That comes up fast, man. Hey, check out for the time, guys. Oh, I thought you done. He wasn't good. Where you interrupted him first? Go ahead, Terry. Just ignoring. By the way, that we quickly gaslighted him.

No, no. He did. I thought he was in the conversation. It's relevant to what we were talking about. He just chimed in with, oh, Jake's next week. And then you are, anyway, guys. No, I was about to actually additionalize what he said. Additional. Wow. Well, you're talking about what you ate there or something.

Go ahead. Carry on the thing and then he can carry on. I can't remember what I'll save. Oh, no. No, no. Yeah, so. You want to fight the end of next year? I, in Newcastle.

B-ball would be a funny one. But, like, genuinely, the problem is he thinks he's, he thinks he's way bigger than he is. And it's quite sad. Like, I see clips of them come up where it's like, he's like, he's, like I see Ed Matthews and HHS streamed to 10K and I'll be there next year and it's like does that not make you want to put him in his place a little more though? Does that make you want to put him in his place a little more? I'm not no because like he will use the fact that I'm too small for him as an excuse not to find me but I think if you're calling

out Max Kedar I mean and Abevo has boxing experience like he's boxed as a kid it's like he's trying to get like a tap in win so in what I'm saying is it's a good folks I think he can he looked all right on the past no this one he he he's better than me. Like, he's boxed as a kid. But, like, I'll have two legs now. But I don't think he'll fight me. I think he's a little pus. I think he's a bit of a loser, like, and a bit sad. But it is just a bit sad because he's, he's went all in so hard into chasing this sort of thing. Like, you're going to have to get another job. Yeah. Yeah. It's not going to work out for you. I must admit, yeah, I, I have the same feelings. I don't, I actually

I pity him a bit. Yeah. Not even in, like, a demeaning way. I, I feel like he's probably a really nice lad but just his wife for doing things just like yeah it's like he's so desperate just to be famous and like still retive the wrong thing man like literally like i could stop doing this in five years but i'll i'll just go back to my normal job and i don't know what he was doing beforehand like but like fucking hell he's just but also like on that note he is just like a prick as well easy though is it an act i feel like yeah no no but if you if you act like a prick you're still a semi-prick because you're like when he's like you are still a semi-prick as you're like when he's like you are still a bit of a prick.

You know what I mean? If you're acting like a caricature, then it's different though, isn't it? Yeah, but if you're acting rude and being knobbed and giving it the big thing online to loads of people like that.

He's seen on that same video you mentioned someone else's name, not who it was, and he's like, if I see him, it's on sight. Imagine being on sight with Bevo. That's quite funny, though. No, but he takes himself so serious. No, but he's been serious, that's the problem.

He takes himself really serious. I think it's fucking horny, and he's like, oh, do you want to fight him and then just snog him? Aye. In the ring? Only fans collab. What would people actually do?

What would people actually do if you just started snogging in the ring? I think he tries to snogging. Would the refs break that up? Can't. Is it? Is it illegal? I don't know, is it? I don't think it's illegal. Is it?

No, it's an illegal move. It's an illegal move. Illegal move? What is it both ways, though? Yeah, for some mutual. What's the ref involved as well? Yeah, all three of them. Wanking in the corner.

Jay, forward age, I just started getting off. What? Is that what your interjection was for earlier? No, I was going to say, speaking of Jake Paul and AJ obviously it's next week we can do predictions but also everyone should buy the Times this week

are you in the story if I make the cut what does that mean what do you mean if you make the cut what's it about I had a need to interview with the Times this week about the AJ Jake Paul fight anyone oh we started all

did you know do you remember what you said I said it would have you written it down to try the double deck of this pizza every single time of like any interview that I've known a person to actually do They just change it to whatever is... I recorded like five minutes of it just in case he did like try and put word...

That's what I'm saying. So we can see visible evidence of them just like changing... Yeah, and I'll read it, be like, I didn't say that. Yeah. Oh, we could start a beef at the time. Yeah. Oh, let's do it.

I told you to go on and tell the Lord's alive. All I said was... Like, what you got to lose? If I'd be in Joe, this probably wouldn't have happened, which is true. JJ's probably got a lot more to thank than me. And Jake Paul, where's my $20 million quid? Oh, modest.

So we know we can cross reference now, whether or not any of those questions. And you're just such a, you're just... I reckon three of his quarters I used all about food. But he was, apparently, it was such a... He all sat there with cookie crumbs on his feet. I did actually mention a little bit about food, but he did...

How? How could you, I was joking. How could you possibly fit that into the conversation? I said we had like 10, 15 minute breaks in between each round because I've been on all day eating a lot of food. He'd been interviewing, like, Jake Poole's manager and AJ's manager and shit, so it should be quite big... AJ? You're on AJ too? James, I am.

AJ, it's AJ, isn't it? Yeah. Big A. You should have said those lies, man. You should have put so much misinformation out there. Like, what have you got to lose on getting on bad terms with the time? I thought it was weird that he didn't, like, this bloke didn't really know who I am. No, he didn't know how it all began.

How dare he? But he kept doing, yeah, he kept making like, yeah, not really into it myself. But anyway, how's this? And he kept doing, like, I'm from finitional media. I don't know. Yeah, I hate people. I like, okay. Yeah.

And then it was a bit of an awkward one, but it seemed to sound off or whatever. Fuck it, who cares. Was it over Zoom or something? Yeah, she's Zoom. But you left.com. What was your fee? I don't know. Should I charge for that?

Yeah? Yeah? Yeah, you should. I would charge 2,000 pounds. You know, the order of boxing? Yeah. I need to start claiming some money. I can't believe you didn't feed in, like, one little lie for them to run with.

I said every day I wake up, hoping Jake Paul gives me 20 million. No, you should have said, like, I know Jake Paul's, like, secret, lucky charm is, like, fucking. Yeah. Oh, well, that, mate. It wears a Johnny for every fight. Yeah, he wears Johnny. He actually wears Johnny's... Fight God, can you imagine.

It stops him getting borners. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you're not going to believe it. There's a cockpric. It keeps on the ball. He wears a fucking deal, though. Who? Jake Paul.

Is he? Is he? He wears a Johnny every fight. Why? It's in case you either wee or spunk yourself during the fight. Yeah. You don't want to have weed dripping down from his leg. I just think of boxes never had we dripping down on the leg.

Imagine how good that would be as a quote, mate. Fucking open people opening their time. Jake Paul wears a condom every fight. You ruined it? Like, you literally could have, you could have... Oh. How I put it. What's the point of Gordon

giving an honest interview? You're not getting that now though because they're going to know it's come from here you've got to create

a new one. Yeah, all the hundreds of thousands of people that watch this they're going to spread the news. Yeah.

I'm like that. I'm spreading. Wait, what? Joey Barton's been jailed. He's not actually going to jail though,

is he? It's suspended. It's a suspended sentence. Fuck him. It's handed a six months and suspended

for 18 months. So he goes into jail in a year and a year and a half. For post aimed at any I'm pretty sure he doesn't, he isn't going to, he's been charged,

he's been suspended, Google it. Was it for hate speech? What's it for? I don't know, he's just, yeah, I think it's whatever, xenophobia or whatever. Basically, it's like, all the stuff, he kept calling, like, um, uh,

Jeremy Vine and nonce and, uh, he kept putting his face on pictures of Fred and Rose West. Seriously. That's not, wait, this isn't, this isn't one of my bit, well, it's just come full sir. Genuine. Six months in custody, so the end of age...

Pull and vine, a bike nonce. Bike non. He's just imagine getting put in prison for someone to find him a bike nuns. Yeah. Oh, go. Really, seriously, you shouldn't get jail for corned people and nonce, but he is in a knobbed. Why do you people watch his, like, he has like a YouTube show, doesn't he? He's just doing it to try and get publicity and stuff like that.

He's a sad little man. There's past tweets where he was all for the women's game when they're going with his daughter and stuff in, like, past tweets. Just to get He's a Vile. Attention, in it? Yeah.

It's a way done, isn't he? Yeah. Speaking of attention, should we do your... How's he gonna pay the 20 grand in cash?

Oh no. Hasn't he got a lot of money? Probably Spunk, he's a fucking idiot. Okay, right. Yeah, speaking of attention, Lou, should we do your world record attempt?

Yes. Oh, fuck. Is it involved food? Yeah, it does, yeah. Luz had a full lunch as well. And a litre of liquid before we started.

That's what, that's what my standard. Why did you drink so much? Right then. Uh, drum roll bees. He will be attempting. Oh! Oh!

The fastest time to eat three minutes points! Yes! This is a fucking sick one, Lou! That's... What, is it? That's fucking grim. Oh, 52 seconds.

It's so drawn. Yeah, it's only three. Three mince pies are fifty-two seconds, man. Holy shit. Can you not... Have water? No, I don't think you're... Yeah, otherwise it's two op.

My dog ate six minutes like that point. Isn't she, she's a food, like a, um, that's not fair, she's fast forwarded us. Have you seen her before? Yeah, she's, uh, she's, uh, professional viz pie eater. Yeah, she's a, well, no, you're ready, mate. I don't like mince pies. Do you not? I love him in part.

Oh, they look, they look, they're pastry ones as well. They are, shit. They're easier. Will, are you got any custard doughnuts for me to 15 plus me? No, you only have to eat three. You've got to beat 52 seconds. No, you've got, no, you've got to eat four to beat it. Oh, it's fastest time.

Oh, wait, I didn't get my timer up. Tom's already got. Is that easy? What's it? Is it not? Yeah, it's like currants and... You never had a mince pie? I don't like mince pie.

Fucking love mince pie. Are they normally puff pastry? No, they're not, which makes it a little easier, I think. Is that illegal, is that legal, though? How is the time I go? 52 seconds. I imagine it's beef mince. What are you doing?

What's you new? All right, Lewis Bowden, your world record is the fastest time to eat three mints pies. You have 52 seconds and 21 milliseconds. You got a real chance here, mate. To be Leah Shotkeva. Do I? Yeah, I think you do. He's got a what?

He's got a real chance. You're still chewing yours? Yeah, but he's not trying to go for the record. You are. Meh, don't go too big of a bite, I don't know. I don't know it's up to you. You do it. Yeah.

Well, I know a lot about food. Why do you do it? You'll sit there. Oh, my God. This is the best thing I've ever eaten. No, he's on his new diet, ain't he? It's not part of the diet, exactly. All right, Lewis Bowdo, are you ready?

Oh, my God. I'm sore fucking full. Hey Louis, look. Get through two though, get through two. Content, mate. I sure, I sure. If you frog, throw up. All right, shot, I shot.

What are you doing topless? Oh, fuck. Oh, that's a cold little crack. This is to the believers. You look like a believer. Excuse me! Did anyone interrupt Neil Armstrong? No, they didn't.

You carry on, mate. What about Lance? No. No. Lance Corporal Willy-wolly. I'm fucking joking around. Hey, oh, Louis. You're stolen.

Hey, DJ, lock him. Lock him. Did you just go out of that? They might invite you on Locked in. Yo, look at that screen. Louie, you look fucking huge and Reeve you look tiny. Tiny. Yeah, it does actually.

Yeah, I'm actually heads up. Isn't it at the end of Beechmotein from now, is up? Oh, are you going to do it or what? Why do you look American? That we are. He doesn't want to beat him. All right, three, Lock in

Two, one, go. Go on. One thing. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you can do this. Oh, my God, he's actually going to do it. You can actually do this. You can do this. You can do this.

You can do this. Why would you put the whole thing in? That was psychotic, mate. Oh, yeah, go on, lad. Go on, Lou, and the other one. Yeah, here you go. He's doing it. He's doing it.

He's got mint fire tip in, mate. Get that fucking down you, son. Get it in your cob, you're going to fucking do it. Hey, you're going to do it. You're gonna break the world record. You can't get on concrete mouth. Yeah! Go on Lou!

Go on Lou! Yes! He's done it! He's bleeding. Empty mouth. Look, you need everything. No, yeah. He's quite clearly eaten.

Lou, you've got ten seconds. Swallow it! Just swallow it. We can always resuscitate you. Just swallow it. Three. Push it in. Two.

You can't even breathe. Uh, that's the time. Come up. And he's a mouth breather as well. Welcome, mate. I'm so proud of you. Yeah, mate. That's a new world record, mate.

A world record holder. That's definitely the closest you've ever got. What are you on about? He's fucking just broke the record. Yeah, he's broked it, mate. That was amazing. Yeah! Yeah!

Yes! I knew you could do it. That's all we knew! Oh, we do! Yeah. Oh, God. Good. No, that's right, mate.

Sorry to say, boys, but I've got some news, got some news. That was actually, that was puff pastry and it's the records on shortcast. Yeah, I thought that, you know. You know what you had to all set and you will run on. Never done before?

Oh, no, no, no, just, no one's stupid enough to do that, like, so. Get in. That's what we do on this show. You know? Get in. What the fuck's going on? Oh, sorry, wrongsure.

The wrongsure. Oh, God. Unicloid t-shirt. Oh, sexy. Unicloid t-shirt, yeah, very nice. You know, at the end there, as a chronic mouth breather, could you breathe? No, and do know what?

Genuinely, the mist pie, when I was spitting out, I couldn't get it, it was like here. It was like, yeah, I was trying to breathe through my nose, but there was no hole, so it's like... I thought that. Yeah, but you have no gag reflex. No, apparently not. Well done, Lou, anyway.

Thank you guys, that's a good record. I'm so, so proud of you. I'm so proud of you. Lou, can I tell you something I've seen? You're gonna love this. All right, a bit of monkey news for you, boys. I've seen this. Monkey news.

Um, sorry. Well, is there any records to do with Skittles at some point? Who wants to eat Skittles? Well, there was smarties with chopsticks, isn't it? That skittles is nice, though. Right, Monkey News is actually a very sad story,

so it's not mean to approach laughter. But the headline, why are you already giggling? The headline read. No, it actually is sad, so I don't want to make a light of what this is. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Why are you laughing, then?

Gere baboon attacks and five men. I don't know he's gay. He's tagging. Five men. So? That's different species, though. It's gay, though. Interspecies.

Yes. No, no, it's gay. Wait, look, why not? If I shug a female monkey, I'm a sick human, but I'm not gay. You might be. No, no. If I bum a monkey with a cock, I'm gay and sick. No, that is true.

You close your eyes and think of a woman. What? No, because if he's having something with a man is a bum hole. Yeah, women have bum holes as well. You didn't know that. Yeah, they're women bumholes. Once more prominent, though. Are they different?

The sphincter. They're not different. Just an ass, mate. Go on then. Right, so it was happening in a little small village, right? And the residents were reporting a lawn baboon. Lawn baboon. Where was it?

He can't believe what he's reading. It was in a small village. No, where? Where was it? Africa. Oh my God, it's a fucking Instagram real. No, no. Oh, boy.

No, it's a true story. It's a verified page. Tell me you just, like, did a little bit of Google on it. Mate, look, it's a fucking monkey. That's him, that's the gay monkey. He's a man. Gay monkey. Including the cameraman.

Monkey. Including the camera. Yeah. That was before being... So then the R word. Before being bummed. Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All right, so basically, like, there was this lone baboon. And essentially, what happens to the monkeys is, like, you get kicking. out your pack if you're a bit dodgy. So say you're the Jeffrey Dahmer of baboons. They're like... Not coming around with us, mate. And they kick them out. Specks on in a wig.

All right. So... So, like, they kick this baboon out. They were like, no, you're not rolling with us, dog. Oh, monkey. Anyway, so, like, he was fucking... Men and women kept walking past this monkey. But, like, whenever there was a man going by,

the monkey would, like, start, like, dominating them. What a breakdown? Like, there was something going on with the monkey. men and one resident I don't know why he named himself because he got bummed. George Tewoon described being confronted by the baboon on the way home.

Chewoon with the baboon? Initially he believed intended to harm him before it was like exhibiting like strange dominance behaviour so it was like getting him to be his little bitch. Oh he's the top. And then the victim actually said he felt like he wanted to kill me but he was after my bum.

True story. True story. Five men have to sort of medical attention Because of the interactions of being Wait, he ripped it off I'm going to go out on the limb and say I don't think this is a real story Mate, real page, real page

Real page Real page Perification thing, mate 128Kth thousand follows Was you 28kth alias Bring new news updates New and stories from across the globe daily Really good

Iso is just essentially this little fucking monkey You're going around and bumming people? A baboon's not a monkey either. Is it a baboon? No, it's not, it's an ape. She did, this, one of the lasses who was, like, touched up by the monkey, emphasized that the animal's focus was on men

in unusual and likely linked to stress, apparently. So maybe the monkey was touched. So maybe the monkey was touched before himself. Stop calling it a monkey. On the note of monkeys, though. Stress bombing people? Yeah. Well, yeah, because he might have been bummed in the past.

I found this class video as well. I want to show you on the back of the have you googled what it is oh look at this I have seen that before does monkey smoke you know he's had look how stressed he is here fucking long day long here the missus has been like getting his here long day or she won't shut the I saw monkey smoking and monkey's bombing is they're used to that that's not a monkey no boys you never gonna believe neither of those stories were about monkeys no but they're all come from the same you never gonna believe it you never gonna believe it they don't

Yeah, they do. Zimbabwean journalists found out using fake news to fund real news. He says, Gay baboon terrorizes villagers. 5 men. It's fake news. No, it's happened. You're an idiot.

He says, a barbway and journal. You didn't check his source. What's your source? Is it the Guardian? The Guardian. Or trusty news. Trusty News, the Guardian. Actually, fear, he had an Instagram page of a 128kk,000 followers.

He had a verified Instagram page. He does one interview with the Times. He thinks he's lost from journalism. He uses fake news to pay for the real news. Journalism is always a passion for me. It's something I've always wanted to do, but I wasn't born with a silver spoon. You're an idiot.

I can't self-fund my talent. Monkeys rape me, bum men. No, they don't. Monkeys do bum men. He earns about $5,000 a month from his fake news cycles. It's not big news. Ask Chat TVT. Do monkeys bun bum men.

One story, they're always a bit, one story about a pastor demanding and then receiving oral sex from his congregation. Did he? Did he? $15,000. Don this. Do Bunky

Monkeys. He just makes up fucking bombing stories. So I got more type of guys. Sounds like Tom. Do Bunkies

bomb men? One of them Yeah, gay baboon terrible. It's going in a lot there, buddy. I'm getting

filtered by the safety stuff. The story details the exploits of a large male baboon in the North West that likes to grope

and bonk human males. You're a complete. One eyesight account. One victim, George Chitune. There you go. Said he was coming

from a local Shabee. and when the baboon attacked him and pinned him down. I thought he wanted to kill me but realized it was after my bomb. It's exactly the same. Yeah, that's a story.

Yeah, he makes it up. There is no such baboon, of course, but that didn't stop more than 120,000 divvy fucking idiot. I'm clicking it. The monkey smoking, the monkey smoking was from the same website. Oh, fuck off, Louie.

That's a chimp. From the same Pee. In Lewis, in your defense, in your defense. Although gay baboons are an exception to this rule, Ernest says it's important that made up story could actually be real at some point.

There you go. So they could get bombed. So you've told us a story that could happen. It probably has happened in history. You're telling me, never in life has a monkey bombed the man. No, they're specifically five people.

George Chachoon or whatever his name was. Which monkey has the biggest cock? Probably, yeah, probably a gorilla. Chimper under the other. Nah, I reckon it's a chured. But a gorilla's not again. They're not monkeys. What do you mean by a monkey?

Oh, yeah. Eight. Which ape species? Yeah. They're monkey. Do you reckon it rang? I think it's got a big one. Oh, I can't it slings it around.

No, I reckon there's a school. You've not seen that photo of you, Rangangutan. Yeah, I've been compared to that quite a lot. Remember the Rangatang we saw at the zoo when he's sat in a box? Yeah, and Peter was like, let's get him out of here. He loved him out. He loved his box. He was fucking wearing eggshells on his head, mate.

He liked the worst person to go to his zoo with. I didn't like it. I didn't like it. I didn't like that zoo. I didn't like that zoo. It was too sad. You could see a monkey having a great time and feels like, oh, it's so sad. He was sat in his box.

Do have a pretty big one, orangutan. The humans aren't that big, fucking hell. Guerrillas got the smallest. It has got a child, like you said. Yeah. But no, bo chimpanzee. Did they all wang? You don't find, when we didn't that, do that?

And he's just, like, staring at it. Do monkeys wank? Yeah, but that's his day-to-day, isn't it, mate? You weren't going to rescue it like Cinderella. Look at that fucking nose on him, by the way. Jesus. What is evolution doing there? Jack Lewis?

Do monkeys wank? Yeah, haven't you seen the clips of them doing it? Uh, no. Do you do the monkeys? Alright, mate. Monkeys wanking. Whanking documentary? I don't want to watch it.

Why would you type in monkey wanking? I want them. Do monkeys wank. Can you search monkeys wanking? I want images. Do monkeys masturbate. I just need a yes or no. Oh, you do it.

Yeah, they'd look. Why is it so red? He's bumming him! Oh, he's eating his own bull sack on the left there. What the fuck he's going on there? You're sucking it. I don't want to look at this. He's pulling his scrot a bit too hard there.

Yeah, get back onto the press. Nature's amazing. Nature's amazing. Yeah. All right, so that's some monkey news, guys. Time for Coulside. Who wants to read it, boys? No, Sala left out of a little.

Oh, tax me, tax me, tax me. You can do it then, Lewis. Case number one. Up the backside, lads. Fuck off. I had a work to do the other week and ended up going back with a girl. Wait, oy.

Lad. She has a boyfriend for 18 months, so fair to say, it's a bit awkward and I've had to keep my head down. Unfortunately, I've drawn her in Secret Santa. What do I do? You get her a picture of you two together. Orger A.

Or just give her a condom. I think that, I think you're making it all, but I don't think you've shugged anyone on me. I think you're trying to show. Oh, here we go. I think he's just hate this, though. Like, what's she doing? Yeah, that's bad. That's poor.

What's he doing as well? He didn't know, though. He didn't know. Yeah, he did. It's worse on her. No, he didn't. He knew. I don't think he knew.

Brocord, my G. He knew, he knew. And there is brocode, but he didn't know. He did know. He just was sling it around. To be fair, there is a point there, because he obviously works with her. So he nor? Yeah, therefore he probably does know that she has a boyfriend.

Good job, jury. But does he know him? Where's your hut and gone, guys? We really, stop putting effort in. Does he know him, though? Does he know? I don't know if he knows him. If you work with someone wrong enough.

Is there a broco still exist if you don't know him? That's morally wrong. Of course. But as Tom would say, it's horny. It's fucking horny as fuck, man. What does he get her in Secret Santa, though? I'd do it. What?

what he should do is get her a Pringle's tube but then he cuts out the bottom of his cock ohly moir's like Olly Murrne Olly Murr? Olly Murr's did that for he put his cock through a pinkle tube yeah I remember the... You're moving like Jermaine Gina said why yeah, you need to chill and then made it was like a prank and his wife and then everyone used a conference going

how sexual assault funny is it yeah it's not funny sexual assault is not funny you just suggested to do that I know not a sexual assault or whatever you want to call it but uh unfortunately what should I do just buy her a normal present why have you why making it with you he should like get something that like day you know what they're on about

why you've had your fun just get on with you know why are you trying to give it the big a nah give her like a fucking I don't know like a like a fucking I don't know he's got a comedian right why don't you just instead of being a bag just play it cool like you you've you've done the deed

I said don't have your fun now just get on with your life she won't know what he gave it Secret Santa yeah I say don't give us shit buy a one of those little boxes of splooge. Did you sack off the whole Secret Santa idea? Don't get her out.

Okay, right. Or give her a book all about regret. Oh, yeah. That's a bit. Is that a bit harsh? Yeah, like emotional blackmail. That's horrible.

All right, then. Yeah, I think, mate, just get on with it and just... She's never going to find out, is she? So you can just get a normal present. Well, he might. Yeah, why are you trying to make an issue? No, I mean, I mean, she might never find out

who her secret center was wrong. Yeah, why you're bragging? You're acting like a bit. Do you ever think about this, right? You know, like, loads of people listen, like hundreds of millions people listen to this podcast, right? Yeah. And there's going to be a lot of boys out there.

If I had a girlfriend for 18 months. Yeah, make the connection. And they're going to be like, yeah. Janet, was that you? Janet. Janet. Oh, yeah, sorry, that's why. Fucking hell, yeah.

Gagnet Gaxon. You know what I mean? Everyone's going to be like, shit. Is that you? They're going to be like, shit. Janet, are you on the fucking pod again? Yeah, and then she'll go No, no, it's not really

And then they'll just move on She won't be lying though How would you ever know, though? Don't know, it plays on your head though Just getting a normal present That doesn't incriminate anything There you go, done Yeah

She's never gonna find out it was from him, was it? Is the Secret Santa? Right, case two At the next Christmas party Yes, boys, it's my first Fuck you make, it's all Christmas works do It's my first work Christmas Do in my new job

And also, as a full-time professional Oh, I was really looking for to it, but it turns out the venue hosting I have been barred from for being violently sick and pissing in the middle of the dance floor. That sounds like a funny night. Sofa Lus Bex's new song sounds shit. I really would like to go and said, I could,

but don't want to tell them the honest reason why I can't go. You can say to him your ban from that place, just don't say why. Yeah, what I do is... Yeah, get them to rearrange the entire Christmas party. They're not going to know. It's private vent. Also, this could be a way back into the place. Yeah.

Getting unbarred. Get your work to speak to them. True. Yeah, you're losing right. It's a private event. We can give in actual advice here. Or go get a really long trench coat and get someone on your shoulders and just be really tall, man. Have you ever been, your dog on your shoulders?

Have you ever been barred from somewhere? Um. No. I have. That's a lad though. Uh, no. I don't think so. I got barred from a local in Sedgefield.

There was this guy who worked there, and he had, like, he was bald everywhere, but you just had Mahiak and he. What's wrong with that? It's kind of cool. It's just what he looked like. He arrived. That's a record in 2001? But like, and then he tried and make me come back to apologize to get me able to get back in.

About what? What did you do wrong, though? I don't, I can't remember. Oh, just you've been drunken disorderly? No, he was a dickhead, though. I probably shouldn't say this because he owns some of the other pubs. He'll bar me from them. But he barred loads of people, and he was like...

You're blacklisting yourself for your home. Yeah, but he was making moose on me me at one point. What? Oh. Can we get this guy number just for research purpose? Let me tell you, I apologize. I've never been... I went to him and I was like, I'm guilty!

That is fabulous! Hey, well, there's a lot of fucking Christmas parties happening at a moment. Yeah, there is. Almost like his Christmas. Yeah, it was out on Saturday. I've never seen Soho that busy my life. It was fucking ram. It's because...

How much like it's December? Yeah. next weekend will be busy as well because it's just before Christmas too the following week you do realize it's Christmas soon a few weeks yeah yeah just just letting you know we have an old Christmas party when we aren't yeah you'll go to the fellow's Christmas party though won't you yeah yeah I'm right there I'm right there I'm right there we go to the dots yeah I'm so jealous are we dressing up oh you're allowed no area on you in a good bit yeah You can wear a shirt, like a funny shirt.

Yeah, you can do a funny shirt. I might wear my Christmas jumper. Oh, that's the extra baby. I'm going to come as Baby Mary. Baby Mary? What is that? Bloody Mary. What does that even mean?

Bloody Mary. We could go with something. Anton Beck. Biles and Matt. Boy, that's bad. You go to Shrek. You got the outfit. Oh, yeah.

No, I don't want to go to Shrek. Wolverine. Got to shoot the next day. I'll be green. We're a helmet. Seen the guy in Benadob who'd paint himself as Shrek would he use real real paint. He couldn't get it off.

No, he had an incredible lalk on it. Oh yeah, the hawk on it. Actual. Actual, like, wall paint. What are you fucking doing? He'd have to put, like, paint, strip on his face, that would probably burn him. No, no, he, um...

Just poured a rushkin of all over him from, fucking beyond the... You don't know about that, of course, right? He never went, did he? Oh, he never went, did he. He got his skiing holidays. Yeah, true. With the farmer lie.

A reclette. Famila. Man, what they give you in like places like maga and stuff. It's just the house vodka and it's... Dramboi. Yeah, it kills your... Dramboi. Then you get a black...

You're on Drambo. Even on a flaming Dramboi? Fraud. Yeah. Flaming Drambeye. No. When are you going skiing? Same time as you.

What day? Two days. I think two days before you. About how long? About how long? I'm only doing four nights. Yeah, weeks long time. Long time.

You're coming, aren't you? No. I got my brother's 30th. my brother's 30th, I'm gonna. Fucking out, there's always a fucking time with you, in there? What? You're a big head, Donovan.

What are you dick, Ed Donovan? Yeah, Donovan. Oh, I have something to bring up. Go on one. So, um, on recent episodes we've been talking about, you know, people inviting people, some people not inviting people to certain events. Yeah.

Um, and there was another incident as well the other day where I invited everyone here for a breakfast on me ahead of a shoot. I said I couldn't make it. Um, Reve said he'd be the, there. I was asleep. I couldn't take them. Such a liar. He said in studio. He would be there. I said I'd try making it. No, no, no. Theo said he'd be there.

No one's going. I never said I was going. No, lads. I saved a table in a fine place for breakfast. He's a weather spoon. Yeah, yeah. And it was like half hour before. No, it wasn't. I said I was there an hour before. I didn't know that face existed. I didn't know there was a lot of space in last an hour. So I was sat there, reserved a big

table and I was left alone to eat breakfast. Good. No, no. You said you had a great time of that. You also said, I'm going to be there if anyone wants to join. Yeah. That's a bit different to inviting people. Guys, I'm just putting it out there so, like, I've been hurt, really.

You really hurt me feelings, especially you because you keep doing it. What do I do? Yeah, you never go out with him socially. Yes, we do. When? All the time. When's the last time you run out with him socially? Not for a shoot.

At the pub last week, me and you? No. Why are you lying about that? Where? Where, which one? So, guys, I want you to know. I want you to know this is real. This is real, no, no, I'm not asked you would like to know when's the last social event you had with you?

I don't know, when's the last social event you had with me? I'm trying to go over there. How have you flipped that as the same question? I invited you to, I invited you to a social event. That is true, and you know what else fucking shown? I put it on me. I didn't say I was going. You said you were going and then I tried to go.

We actually do see him socially. So do we. Me and I've got the train home together the other day when we were pretty drunk. Yeah, from what? Finishing work, Tom. Yeah. And then for three hours at the pub, we're having social drinks. No, that's not true.

So I just want you to know A lot of you might get your wish Of me leaving the shows Because I can't work with someone Who keeps doing this to me You are let off Because you have done it in time He was radio silent at the home one

At least I messaged you at 7.30 in the morning I was asleep No you didn't He had 7.30 in the morning Yeah he messaged to apologize Oh Another line Should we read the messages

That's the Lewis I read them to him Oh he's got some fake text That's true. Look at you now. Look at your fucking... Are you backtracking, are you? No, I've seen you've got...

You notice how quickly you can get the text out? You just never text, yeah. Actually, can't. I mean, we text about work all the time. About what? About what? Yeah, yeah. Always work.

Always work. Always work. Always money. So it is... Do you guys want to set up this new golf channel? Should just leave it to me and Lou? Yeah, leave it to you too. Is that right?

There you go. There you go. I don't know what golf channel you're done about? Allegedly. Yeah, allegedly. Alleged. Uh, mate, I can't, we have so many messes. You just took the field.

I think you mean the bogey boys, mate. I don't think an apology is too much to ask for. Oh, we're even texting on the way home together. Look at that. Oh, God. Just go to the morning. No one cares. I don't know, mate, there's so many messages.

Oh, whatever. Yeah. Oh, we'd like to apologize. Oh, here's my message. Oh, thank you for apologize. Oh, your breath. Uh, Louis, I'm very sorry, mate. Oh, very, very sorry, mate.

Got him very late last night, had loads to do. You're going to try and make it there as haven't eaten yet. Did you make it there? I said, please forgive me As an hour before we're meant to me as well Very easy to apologize And Lewis goes Ha ha ha it's fine

I knew you weren't making it this morning However Tom said he'd come Big messages So he actually tried to throw you under the bus I'm not mine though Actually replied to him saying Yeah I was just trying to wind Theo off Oh yeah

Yeah he did it sure remember See so it's all for You lie your shit's in gig I didn't invite you and you didn't come That is true The fuck's I might You're acting like I'm there on you didn't apologize. No, they're not denying it. You're the only one arguing. I'm not denying it.

I invited you to breakfast. You tried to tell me that I didn't message you. I might need to breakfast on me, on me. You didn't arrive. That's a lie. And, and you only message me after I put a picture of me sat at the table inside food. The random woman with the random woman. Yeah. You only I don't like how you brought. Are you to you? Are you scared of these two? Is that what it is? I never said I was going. He's apologised. Also, he actually hangs out with me. You, Mr. Theo every single time. You're an embarrassment, mate. Oh, it might be.

It might be. Just, you're just, you're just, you're just, you're trying to do all for clicks, and you know how much I love for you, and you know how much I fucking mess with you. No, it's not even being the Christmas special yet. Listen, honestly, honestly,

I message you so much love all the time. Oh my God. And you're trying to come at me. Don't actions mean more than words? Do you know what, Tom? I'd say they want. That's why I've already got a Christmas special for any of you. I'm not buying him a Christmas present.

I'm not buying any of you a present. You're not. after you can't do it from the show an hour before the show this time. What do you mean outside of the show? See, sometimes, Theo. All to do it work, but getting Christmas for work, work, work. I do it outside of the work. You're doing it for work.

You said to me this, I've already got yours. Yeah, not for... No, no, no, no. Answer the question, when are you going to give it? When are you going to give it? I was meant to bring it in last time. When are you going to give it? What are you going to give it to me?

The next time I see him? No, during the Christmas... It won't be on the recording then, no. It won't be on the recording. 10 pounds. Okay, you'll have to get me another present then. You'll have to buy me another present for on the show then, Phil. There's literally what I was going to do. He's like, over there, he said he's only got five for the store. This morning. I don't get me. I don't get me. What is it? Are we trying to take a game of trying to one up each other? Why can't

you just be nice? Gaslighting again. Oh my. Gaslighting again. Why can't you say Lewis? Why can you ever just admit that I love you and you love me? Why? Why you always got you always got to argue. You never argue with him or him. You always come at me. No one showed up to their fucking breakfast, mate. You're only coming at me because I'm the only one that I've never said I was going. Yeah, but I... You literally didn't even text him. You fucking give radio silence.

He's too scared of you. I was asleep. He's too scared of you. At least I fucking messaged him that morning. Feel. Don't wink, but that's all some fucking jokes. All right? You're scared of him, admit it.

We actually hang out. Talk about my boyfriend. I'm scared of him leaving me, yes. But I offered you a free breakfast, which is, if anything, I'm bribing you to hang out with me. Prove it. Prove it. Yeah. Prove it.

I don't have to prove it. Prove it. Prove it. No. Because you can't. Okay. Oh, well, you win, mate. Yeah.

Honestly, just, I'm, stop trying now, it's my thing. We just, sometimes, like, sometimes we just like to be not used. You gaslighting me. You don't even like to socially. You're gaslighting me. It's crazy. You gaslighting us. You use me.

Every dear, my life is about gaslighting. Am I getting triple gaslit right now? Every time I was even. You're like a serious. Every time I get a message from Theo, and this is not worse... He's doing it again! He's doing it again! This is not joking.

Every time I'm like, oh, what's he need me for now? Or what's he using me for now? Lewis do this, Lewis do that. That is very funny. How's this gonna make you funny? Do you know what I get a message from you all the time? Have you done this? Have you done that? Have you done this yet?

Have you mentioned this yet? Have you mentioned in the wrong? I think those are your messages. You're looking at the wrong. Let's go and read them, make your head. Oh, we have to move on this show. All you mentioned me about is fucking... It's fucking, have you sucked the golf channel?

Why don't you fucking do, Sam? Why are you trying to gaslight instead of apologise? I apologize that morning! It's all right. We know your real friends are the ones with millions of subscribers. It's fine.

I bet, hey, I guarantee if Kiersai invited him out to breakfast, he would have been there. He would have found some time, yeah? Oh, he did have been there. I think that would have been. I think that would have been. If he was like, hey, Theo,

been a long time. Let's catch up, bro. Yeah. And the Leicester Square Weather Sproof. The best of the Spoon's tomorrow morning. there. He would have been there plenty of time. You made it be, you've appeared of it, paid for it yourself. Yeah. Do you agree with that or where?

You're a gaslighting son of a bitch, you know. You've been made time for a time for a time. You're going to be aggressive. Made interview time for the time. Again, it's... You get enjoyment out of this, just like constantly bringing negative anything. It actually hurts me. It hurts me every time. I mean, I'm just giggling along. I didn't really actually do it.

I remember on this show, yeah. We used to like have banter and, like, have fun and like... I remember that as well. And now all you do is just gaslight and have a go at me for nothing. You're gustlighting me. It's true. I remember when I used to come to the show and have fun. Oh, no. Yeah.

Well, that's the end of backside people. No wonder the fucking views are so much better at the start. People enjoyed hanging around with each other. Now, all I get is just like... Yeah, but we don't hang around with each other. That's the point. I tried to hang around with you. We try.

You still continuing it. You can't never just admit it again. Oh, my God. Do you mean a babie? Right, Christmas songs. All I want for Christmas is officially the most... stream Christmas song of all time and earning Mariah royalties of around two to three million pound each year. As Hugh Grant's character says in about a boy, what the fuck is this?

It's a film. If you can write a great Christmas song, you'll never have to work another day in your life. That's a good point actually. It was first released in 94 and almost three decades later the song was reported to have made more than 75 million. She actually just released her own pajamas. Off the back of it? This year, yeah. Christmas pajamas. Her song does me out. It's funny to see that, you know, the trend graph on, like, YouTube search for Mariah Carey all I want for Christmas is you. In like eight months of the year, it's flatlined and then it just goes. Because it approaches Christmas and they start listening.

Right. My initial thought process. Yeah. Why are you not laughing at my jokes and I'll feel? Right, mate. Thanks, man. Everything's going to be okay. So what are the top three Christmas songs ever written?

Pogue, surely, is the food. How was that one, go? You scumbag, you maggie, you cheap, lousy. That's the song? It is the song. No, I know it's a song, but... This thing about the bit is an end of the best girl. Interestingly fit the exact same part of the stuff.

As Paul actually told me, that has an S on the end of it. Yeah. You scumbag, you, maggot, you cheap lousy, f***. Then it's the food. Yeah, they're like the meatball, yeah. That's a great. They're nice, bro. What are the top three questions?

the song's written, I'd go, last Christmas. Yeah, that's my favourite. Stop the cover rate? No, Justin Biba. Buh, Bambi Bap, Bap, Bambi Bha. Justin Bha, get out of here, you fucking loser. That's shit.

Stop the cover of you, the Pogs. I like, I like, I wish it could be Christmas every day, I like that one. Yeah, that's good. No. Wizard. Wizard. What's, are you ready, children?

What about? A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-Boo. What's the best Christmas album's got to be booblers? it, the covers of all of it. I wouldn't know any. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, I'd go.

Mariah's not even in my top three, by the way. I think she'd be in mine. Yeah, she has to be. She's iconic. The song. Oh, one of that song. Sorry. You hear Eminem's disc track on her.

Yeah, three years ago. That went off. That kind of went on. It's clear a discrex season. You see 50 cent. He fucking, he just mogged P. Yeah, he did. Yeah.

He released little. Why did he go and CNN, Lou? To mog him? Because they play it in the prison. It's the only TV radio, TV, news station they're coming in. Is it? So, guys, you don't know, basically he's 50-7 released a documentary on his long-time rival, P-Diddy. They're not even rival.

Oh, they don't like it to them. Wait, wait, you're a nickname basis of P-Diddy, are you? No, I call him P-Dog because he's a fucking dog. You're a nickname basis of him, bro. Oh, you think he's a dog? Yeah. He's got the dog in him? No, no, he's a bad dog.

You don't need the G, really, dude. Bad dog. Like, naughty boy, bad dog. Oh, he'd like that. Yeah. On the freaker. Oh, I basically just mug. him and they made us sure that he was a dickhead and then he like was like what you can do about

50 cent do you ever see that photo then he did he put up a photo of he want a bike and a 50 cent you know there's no seat on that right who 50 cent is so fucking funny by the way he's petty as fuck what do you do soon what does you want me come back from a long day long long day at work you've done five podcasts you're sweating really tough day it's been really oh here he goes Mr. Relatable over here, sorry You've absolutely Get him feel You're absolutely naked

You're sweating The tube was packed You walk out Packs full of pussy You get home You walk into your bedroom Cheryl Oh no

50 cents Downward dog Nade but he's shit himself What are you doing next? I've got to give him toilet paper first I'll be like Yo, Fiddy You Fiddy, man

Fiddy, Fiddy, man No, I'm normally, man Why's in Jamaica? That's what I'm gonna say No, man That's how we taught I'm like, you man, Where are you shit under shit sundown, man?

That is not how we talk You know, Fiddy man, bum, bro It's a madness He doesn't talk like that That sounds like Kaisot. Oh, Pamalab, it's a madness. Kaysai's on the phone. He's like,

No, what does he say? Right, no, he goes, Nah, Pamelaam. It's a madness. I love how an accent of you doing an accent of yourself is just like more Jamaican. I'm trying to do in 50 cents. No.

What? You said yo fiddy. Yeah, I'm talking to him in an American accent. That's his tongue. You're doing Jamaican. Yeah, but why would you not just speak in your normal voice? Because he doesn't understand Jardie. You're not a joke.

So you went to fucking Kingston. I am. But you're fiddy. Spaff on me, bro. What the fuck? So you've done an English accent there anyway. You can't understand me, so just... After a long hard day, you walk in, all you want is 50 cent

to spaff on your face. I'm just saying he's quite funny. Bear in mind, he's just shit himself. Would you lick it too? I'm glad we... Oh, actually, Felice Navida, that was a good one. Oh, yeah. And there's a...

But it's this half English, that one, isn't it? Isn't it? Police namida. And then he goes, I want to wish you a Merry Christmas. Police Namme dad. Police knobidod. Police knobidoo. Oh no.

I haven't even seen it. Raggy? You're gonna put the... Rage. Hey, what would you do if Scooby-Doo is in your bed? Arched. He just shit himself. Oh, it's a dog.

What do you mean? He arched. He's real. That's a... Dog's arched. Big time, bro. But they're already in doggy style. That's how they stretch.

And he's like, Ribi? You've got a TV. Ruh. Rui? Rui. Roo and Rade. If not, you can just send it to.

What is it? Is it the... It's muted in the top right of the... Screen. Oh, yeah. The actual... The actual audio is muted, mate. There you go.

There you go. The Christmas song, Felis Navidad, sounds like a scouser saying, police nabbed me dad. It's crowd. be real. So listen for police, police nab me dad. It does actually. It is scarce action.

Police nab me dad. Please not me dad. That's fucking horny man. That's pretty cool. Get some porn on. You're right over there. What you do with your hand? It's like H.S.'s's hand too. When a guy you fucking... That's that, man. You're not in on the chicken. Are you in the moon? No.

No, I was just staring at that song. What's this next one? What are you doing with your hand? It's just how it sits. Or you don't rest your hand like that? Not really. Some guys' first words after being completely paralysed. What?

I want a beer. Good laugh. Brain implants communicate for the first time in months. The man suffered amoeotrophic lateral sclerosis. Earless challenge. Yeah, leaving him unable to communicate after he lost the ability to move his eyes. However, two square electrodes. a ray implanted into his brain

allowed him to communicate after being left in and locked in state what was the point of doing those old fucking challenges if people still get it first thing you asked for was a beer fucking get it in there should you need such a switch of beers on Christmas songs in death ELS

hey let's play it let's play a game what do you think each of our first words would be in this instance oh um oh definitely something about getting like a burger burger burger

There you go An honest one I'd probably love What's the What's the What's the God Where's my family

Oh Shut up They're fucking They're fucking right with you Because you're frozen You said that Where's my family They're right in front

You probably You probably You probably's asked From the doctor Because you also Practice medicine Yeah Yeah

Yeah I said Don't What's the dying What's the dying No He'll still Have my place

In medicine He's cool He licks He says I'll take it From here Doc I'm paralyzed

Not anymore But, Reeve, chances are your family's with you already, mate Sorry, yeah, that's what, yeah, okay I'd probably ask for the prem table But you can still see Oh, right, Newcastle of 13, then what? Fucking put me back under

Like into a corner I think I'd go It's got a bit of pizza or something God, I'm so happy to be alive I've just shit myself I've shit myself That's what I'm wondering I think I've shit myself

He also sent a message to his son Which said, I love my cool son What? There you go, he asked for his, if you get to listen to his favorite band, he asked for a curry and get a head massage. You missed off of it. Yeah, first thing yes for me.

After the month of being unable to communicate, first he asked him as a beer, and then he also asked if you could listen to his favorite band for a curry. So this whole time he's been able to see? Whoa. I just said that. No, sorry, you read the line before, though.

So this whole time he's been able to see. Yeah, we knew that. I thought he was in a coma. So, right. So this whole time he's been dying for a head massage. But he wasn't able to communicate. He's now one of... But it's from his mummy.

And he was going like... Brain implant. Yeah, it's like, huh? And they keep giving him water and stuff he's like... He actually couldn't do that. His old face was paralyzed as well. And they keep, no, they kept like him, snogging him and like going... Yeah.

You like that, don't you? I think that's from something you're looking straight. That must be so jarring. Oh, if that ever happened to me, can kill me, please. And they go, oh, we could have waited 30 minutes. It's been back. No. With the whole thing come back around.

Like, he just said with the things in his... Yeah, a brain implant. Oh, that's fucking mental. Yeah. We had an apple. They aren't going to start doing that with, like, what Elon's doing with the brain implant. So we're going to stop using our hands and talking. How are we going to blaze?

That's how they say aliens apparently, like, communicate to you. You just know it. You just know it. You just know it. You just know what they're doing. What proof? People who have interacted with them. Yeah, who?

Like the film arrival. Who? Who else? The main in black. People from the army and that. There was that new documentary I told you to watch. It's on Amazon Prime. What's it called?

It's called The bullshit Brigade Only dummy dummums watch this No go on Only dummy dummums watch this Shoot the guy who was correct What's it called

I think it's the age of awakening It's called How do you know an alien can just Talk to in your head That's the consistent thing That they do Across all the stories Yeah because that's a cool thing

To create it as a new You're from Hayterite Why do you hate The idea of aliens And this shows just attack me I'm attacking you back I don't want to attack you I've been nice to you all

episode all I did was raise how you hurt my feelings that's communicate You only do it to me after I apologise that morning and said you're scared of this fucking guy We go to the pub

Don't get me starting you Go on you I actually turned him down to go to the pub recently I've never turned him down I've never turned you down I've never turned you down Is

Yeah I don't know I don't explain the irony I don't know why you want to keep Shirkling back to because I think You end up in the worst person.

I actually think we're better than this. I think there's better content out there just to... Okay, how about this? But it's just a joke. How about this? It's not a joke because it happens every episode. All right, then we won't have a laugh at them. I've been going back to medicine for the last four weeks, mate.

Yeah, exactly. Tell us some content, then. We'll talk about it. No, refuse. What's better then? No, there's plenty of better content. If you talk about our fucking whoop scores or something, like. Is that all, what do you think I am?

A whoop score now, is it? Is this better content? Yeah, this is so much. You do in the phone now? You do it. I actually think people quite enjoy us, ripping into each other, just having a bit of a laugh. It's a friendship group, mate. That's what friends do, don't they?

Yeah. Lou was annoyed you didn't go to breakfast, and he brought up, that's what it is. Your mic up there. I love that. I've just heard because I like you so much. What you said to him then? Don't like him as much? Is that what it is?

No, we actually socialise a lot together, outside of work there, that's the point. I don't know why you try and have this conversation, because you look silly. I just miss you. And this is my way of reaching out. Yeah, when you have a mandatory position across from each other. When I can hold you here for conversation. Anything today? This is great content.

Yeah, should we do the quiz, mate? Do your quiz, bud. You've done that. You got your thing to do, your fact. No, he did that. I told you about the monkeys who. Oh, not listening again. Doesn't care about you.

You remember the monkeys were gone. How's monkey news? That's not a fact. No, that was his fact. I got a fact for you as a fact. No, we'll do the quiz. We'd save the fact for next. Do you know, octopuses actually only have one heart?

I thought they had three. I thought they had eight. That's their legs, I'm pretty sure they have three, don't they? No. People, it's just spread of misinformation. Right, then, let's do the quiz. I suppose to your bombing monkeys. Also, I'll save this, though.

What is that? You need help. Hey, why are your same thing? Oh, is it a fucking Walker thing? What are they called? I don't know. No, you did it a couple weeks ago. I think it's a wolf man.

Oh, right. How many questions is it, Theo? Fine. I got this as well. Oh, what is it? Lacking. It's a, it's a, it's caught a goblin. Gobby?

Look at his face, though. That's the, that's Dobby from the prediction show, ain't it? Irishmen poplar believe in goblins. Just the Irish? Right then. We should learn about the history of that. In 2014. Russian man, Igor Borough Zimbistin, was attacked by a bear and faced certain death.

However, when his phone rang with Justin Bieber's baby as a ringtone, the bear fled, saving his life. Dun. Wow. Dun, do, do, oh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. Uh, d'un, uh, Dundin. Before mating, male drafts head but the females in the bladder until they piss, then they taste. What, shut up, man.

Let's do the crazy. Then they tasted to see if it's obvious. learned that's fucking horny actually got five or six questions and a few of them are a part of the theme which is I'm a celebrity oh well I have watched it okay well how many members of Mcfly have won Amma Celeb it's all about you get you get a point for the number you also get a point per name if any I'm fucking I don't know I think I've got that All right question number two

What year did Armist-Leb first air Fucking hell I know that is it? It's all about you, baby Next question What famous football manager won in 2018 So easy It's all about you

Manage Spartak, Moscow. I have a little kelet clue for you, yeah. Is that an honest clue? Yeah. Oh. I don't know. There's two answers to this one, so I'll accept either or.

What are the closest major cities that I'm a celeb? Where it's filmed. Major cities. So easy. Next question. How many hearts does an octopus have?

Oh, I'm just giving you the fucking answer. Okay. And the final question. question in 2022 who sent this text message

I love how X is having fun with the gang mocking X and then celebrating

Man United's goal even though he supports the same club what I don't hear the question

what sent the text text to who okay I'll get rid of the X's and say the names what I love this text was sent in 2002

it's from someone to someone oh 2002 2002 sorry on arm's slept no we're not octopuses aren't part of armistlam um this is a not that was the theme yeah I said the theme yeah I said the theme

pitted off who sent this message 2022 I love how even Reeve is having fun with the gang mocking Theo and then celebrating man United's goal even though he supports the same club who said that who said that

wait what out of us an I'm a celeb? No, nothing to have Armistoleb anymore. Oh. What the fuck is? The question is who sent that text message? Say that. What was the...

Say that again, sorry, I've not processed that properly. I was... I love how Even Reeve is having fun with the gang, mocking Theo and celebrating many nights' goals, even though he also supports the same club. So you were mocking me for not... When the United scored, even though you support Arsenal,

obviously made out of playing Arsenal, weren't they? I was mocking you from Man United to score. You're mocking me. Yeah, so you were celebrating a Man United goal against asking. Who sent that text? Who sent that text? All right, that's it. I'm deaf I've gone six or six here.

I don't know. I don't even think I've got six answers. Yeah? How many got five? There's been six questions, mate. And some of them are multiple. Some are multiple points. Right, how many members of McFly of one?

I'm a celeb. Two. Two. Two. Danny and Tom Danny and Dougie Danny and Dougie Danny and Tom

Danny That's it I just put Danny McBoyle All right you get a point for two Yeah

You get a point for Danny Jones And you get a point For Dougie Pointer So I got two points I got four Tom's misses one in 2020 though

But cool Yeah the podcast I won it And one of them One of them one What do you call it Yeah Harry Yeah Harry

How you want four points Did you get two for saying wait no yeah you get a point saying to yeah oh get a point through her name right I'm on two that four uh what year did it first air 2006 2001 oh fucking out that but they're having the anniversary yeah yeah he's Tony blackburn was the first winner it's about it's about 25 years old it's 2002 oh I had that deleted that as well I just thought they were having an anniversary episode next year was it yes it's a cele special next year yeah we'll speak like they've

15 years or 25 years. 25 years, yeah. What famous football manager won in 2018? Harry Redner. Harry Redner. Fuck off. I actually wrote Harry Redna. Is that correct?

Yeah. Oh, nice. Well, good. Was that a guess? Yeah. No way. Yeah, yeah. I thought you would know that.

All right, point per city. What are the two closest major cities to where it's filmed? Brisbane and Sydney. Hell no. I put Melbourne and Adelaide. Melbourne and Perth. Okay, Brisbane's nowhere near Sydney. But you do get a point for Brisbane.

Oh my God. And the other one is Gold Coast. Yeah. Am I winning? I'm on four. I'm on four. Gold Coast is in place. Yeah.

Oh my God. I might have got this last one as well. There's two left. There's not. There is. Yeah, there's two questions left. Oh, yes. So obviously, I have to lose remarks earlier.

How many hearts does an octopus have? One. Three. Three. Yeah. Well, it depends what breed you're looking at. kind of a harsh list it's three it's three no the one i was looking at the brief not all octopuses it's three another fact another fact that's no no no no it depends on the species the species

of octopus octopus it's free right uh who sent this message in 2022 i love how even reeve is having fun with a gang mocking theo and then celebrating many knight's goal even though he supports the same club I remember Louis's mob Okay, good shout Oh, I thought it might have been like in the FPL group chest

So I put Chip Okay, Chip I did put Cal but I wish I put Arteta because that could be it as well Artetta You guys in Lumber You might be watching the string

But I've got freezing I've got Cal freezing During a game By the way This is during a game Okay, they sent me this directly So it's not Chip

Oh, is it in a group chat Never mind It is in fact Lewis It's Lurin Louis? Just Lewis, yeah. Oh, was that behind the Jesus? Yeah.

That's why I went for Lewis's mom so I felt like you've gone through the messages and seen something. I thought maybe his mom had, that sounds like a mom message, doesn't it? How would my mom have Theo's number? No, I thought you'd have sent a screenshot of, do you know what I mean? Oh, my mom's just text me this kind of thing.

Also, he has been fucking, you know. Yeah, I have been. How many points you'll get? Thanks, 50K. Four? Four. Four? A best number five Yeah, shock Tom wins Okay What?

Nothing, carry on What? What? Let's see a Flanks for 50 K in that one He just said it Thanks for tuning in guys We'll see you next week Hopefully

Theo actually socialises with us this week We'll let you know next week We'll let you know Don't hold your breath Not bad yourself Goodbye Never You made it to the end

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