Back Side - Tom Garratt's Most Disgusting Story Yet, We EXPOSE Lewis’ Secret Diary & Reev Opens up on Hate...

Episode Date: April 24, 2025

Tom opens up on pooping his pants, Reev opens up on hate comments as Lewis reveals he has a secret journal! And can the lads guess which is the fake headline in Gaz Gobbles.If you'd like to work with us, email the studio on [e-mail] by The Fellas Studios: https://fellasstudios.com/podcastsTheo:https://youtube.com/c/HiMalfoyhttps://youtube.com/c/TheoBakerVlogsOllie:https://youtube.com/c/reevhttps://youtube.com/c/OllieFletcherTom Garratt:https://www.youtube.com/@TomGarratt10Lewis:https://www.youtube.com/@lewisbowden1 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to a new episode of Backside with me, Reeve, Theo Baker, Tom Garrett and Lewis Bowden. If you haven't already hit follow, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week. And if you want to see more Backside, catch us on YouTube, TikTok and Instagram, where all you have to do is search Backside. Let's get into it. ACAS powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Ever heard a story so wild you just had to know if it was true?

I'm Alexa Steele from Degrassi, and on Steele My Story, we put celebrity guests to the test. Join me and comedian Ian Fisher as we play a hilarious game of true or stolen story. Our guests share two stories, one from their own life and one they, shall we say, borrowed? Can you guess which one really happened to them? Subscribe to Steal My Story on the Sonar Network or wherever you get your podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com I did one thought and I thought, oh, I'm close now.

As I pushed my legs off the floor, all just came out. Oh, this is so grim. It's all up my legs. Put the boxes in the sink and I'm just... Oh, it's a wave! 5 put the boxes in the sink and i'm just saying five and a half kg of yeah in the dog in the dog yeah it hadn't been poo for 50 days how do they know that though i don't know yeah that must be an estimation of maybe a week it would normally poo it just had a big weekkg a day what do you mean kg a day who do you reckon shifts the most poo

out of us me I think he eats most yeah is that how it defines it does some people's bodies like use less of the nutrients

and maybe passes more of the poo no but I think just statistically if you eat more you poo more I don't know if I eat the most here

wouldn't I be the fattest here no because you burn it all off you do endurance exercise don't you that's why you do iron men yeah that is all off you do endurance exercise don't you? that's why you do Ironman so you can

yeah that is true actually you probably are that what do you weigh? 83.5 I'm 85 so we were on about just who shits the most I actually shit myself the other day

fuck off again? That's definitely the highest age then. I haven't shit myself since I was about 10. 29. Before we go in. It's a weekly occurrence. Officially the oldest age of the group

of last time he's food and stuff. That's 29. That's not the round of love. And what, were you drunk? No. So, I know. That's the best part it's so degrading

we had football last Thursday out and about or like no worst thing is it was shit on a limb

if you let me get through the story you'll figure it out no but I'm just so I'm just so interested to see if so went to football and then literally had one beer

after football because we were all a bit knackered and driving because we football's funny because we started with four men six or so

tell me you still won yeah we still won with the league it's in our hands but but that was a struggle having two less men is that the game

you jetted home for huh is that the game you jetted home for wait you still won with two less players? No, no, we just had to sit, like, we didn't, it was nil-nil until the rest, then one turned up and it was 6v5, and then we didn't score until it was 6v6.

Oh, still impressive. Yeah, we did well. Anyway, then weirdly, we only conceded when it was 6v6. Always the case, so hard to score in football, that. So, finished football football had one beer and on the way home I was like I really fancy a Chinese

like really and there's one right by my flat and I've never tried it so I thought while I wait because I know I went in I was like

I had my order and I was like how long she's like half hour I was like brilliant there's a pub literally adjacent to it go and have a beer

had two felt great on your own looking yeah I love it mate there's nothing better than a solo point uh no one nagging you're fucking brilliant uh or boring you oh i did this at work i don't care i don't give a fuck about your day at work about a bicycle they they know not to bring work up to me uh don't talk about your life yeah i want to talk

about if i get to the problem i want to talk about if I go to the pub with my mates I want to talk about shit not work on this occasion little shit so then I get home I ate a lot of Chinese a lot

what's the Chinese order so this one I went for a quarter duck and I also had a king prawn satay chow mein oh yeah with fries

I didn't really eat much of the fries and then obviously prawn crackers but like I ate it all. I usually leave a bit like Chinese you tend to order loads and you don't eat it all but I'll scram the lot of it.

Really hard in football didn't you? Well yeah but I just I was just half awake at work. Yeah I was just really fancy

anyway scrammed it sat down and then the farts start and I'm like I'm like do I need a shit shit i'm like nah it's just they're like wind like a little bit wet like the silent but really smelly fart yeah yeah yeah when you know one's brewing i bet you love smelling them as well i know yeah

this actually is quite grim like you've just had a chai and eat now you're just mixing that smell with actual so then and then I did one fart and I thought oh I'm close now and so I was like I now need to stand up and go for a poo as I pushed my legs

off the floor to stand up it all just came out on my arse it just emptied into my boxers wait I did wait so you had

shut yourself prior and then it fell out or you your arse fell out so me me going the push of my legs made me shit Wait, so you had shut yourself prior and then it fell out? No. Hang on, Tom. Your arse fell out. I thought it would be a little bit. Me going, the push of my legs made me shit. Right.

So you've, as you've driven your legs up. It must have been sore claws on the brim for that. Wait, Tom, I thought you were going to say like, oh, a little bit like a fart. No, no, no. Like. No, it's actually like diarrhea. Puss in the fart. You diarrhea'd into your pants.

No, it weren't diarrhea, but it was. It must have been a bit sloppy it must have been curled up turd in there no it was like for it to come out like that

the only thing I can describe it is as like a cow pat a full cow pat that's pretty much diarrhoea that's diarrhoea that wasn't diarrhoea

it's a bit diarrhoea and I had white Calvin Klein's on did tell you bend them obviously not wearing them today

what did you do how was it getting to the toilet oh How was it getting to the toilet? Oh. How was it getting to the toilet? What's the scenario there? Yeah, I had to get in the shower. Does it run down your leg?

No, because then obviously, so then, it's so grim. So then I'm like, oh my God, I need to get the rest of it out. So I sit down to shit

and then it's all up my legs. It's, and I'm hairy boy, as you know. You are very hairy. And I'm like, oh my God, I just have to strip off. Then I just throw, I, as you know. And I'm like, oh my God, I just have to strip off.

Then I just throw, I take the boxes in the shower with me. And honestly, mate, what were you thinking? No, sorry, no, sorry. I put the boxes in the sink and I'm just like,

oh, that's where you brush your teeth. Wait, Tom, how did you get from sofa to toilet? Waddled. But the toilet,

you know when you sit down Are you holding your arse at that time yeah but you know when you sit you know when you pull your pants down I need to know about this

you sit you're going to sit down in the toilet I would just get straight in the shower at this point strip off shower because I still

had shit in me if you take your pants off it could just like go on the floor no but you I carefully took them off and then threw them in the sink

yeah go for more you need to clear it out if you shut himself but I still had shit all on me. So I needed... I was shitting. I'll bet you felt so grim. And Tom's the most relatable

one in the group. It wasn't... I didn't feel grim. I felt degraded. Yeah, what did you say to yourself in your head? When you walked into the toilet, like, what's your voice?

And you're like, my voice is going... This is a great anecdote for my side. You're nearly 30 years old and you just shit yourself. That is exactly what my voice says at that point do you bother wipe on or do you just go straight to the shower

I shit no no I finish my shit off went to wipe and then when I went to wipe I saw it was like all in my legs so I was like I've got to get in the shower well you don't normally wipe anyways you'll just get in the shower did you bleach the sink?

yeah nah I just rinsed it the sink was a bad decision no it wasn't it was it's better than the shower because my shower plug then it'll all get clogged up

with shit I was standing in the sink did you take the bins out straight away? the next morning next morning no because I fully

washed the boxes and put them in my bin and then next morning took them down. And then I ate them a bit. Yeah, they were clean. But... Oh, that is degrading, you know. Did you tell anyone?

Yeah, I've told all my mates. I haven't told Liv. She's probably fine now. I live. That is actually just a bit like what do you do in the scenario though? You're just like, what can you do?

You just feel like, oh... Well, no. You've just got to accept it. I just felt like you, your life is shit did you did you say to yourself i'll never have a beer and a chinese again i wasn't no but next day do you know what if i can't get prone if i was like pissed out my head or like i'd do the thing yeah you'd be like okay

i was like i'd have three beer and i wasn't it wasn't it wasn't i was getting started i wasn't even i wasn't even tipsy I can't even blame alcohol that's why it's so degrading it would make me feel like shit though

it didn't make me feel shit well originally I thought I could just tell no one you have to three beers

not get your digestive system a little bit icky anyway or not no I don't think no

I would say it's probably more the Chinese in the bit. It's probably the Chinese sitting down and snoozing and playing F1 probably. Is that what, you had it in?

Oh, that would be why. That would have accelerated I think. Or was that night where you put the picture in actually? Was it that night where you put you

playing F1 in the chat? Maybe. Straight after. Who little do we know straight off his chest himself. You should have seen the poo on his controller in front of her.

Yeah, it wasn't, it wasn't my proudest moment. I did like, I told you when I pissed the bed, like not long ago. And then I thought that day more and after I thought I died, so I phoned the hospital or like 111. What do you mean you thought you died? That doesn't make any sense.

I thought, I thought. If you thought you were dead, why are you ringing the hospital? No, I didn't thought I was dead, but I thought for me to be doing that at this age, there must be some serious health issue wait you pissed

the bed yeah he did tell us I think I did yeah were you drunk the night before no

it was the same as him so I'd rather actually no I'd rather yours because yours is just like dodgy food whatever

mine's like you can't hold your piss I don't even think it was dodgy food it was really nice

it was tasty it was fresh I don't think it was dodgy food I It was really nice. It was tasty. It was fresh. I don't think it was dodgy food. Why did you use that? I think it was just literally, I just waited far too long to actually go for the shit because I'm trying to beat

Verstappen in the World Championships and he's too fast. He's got too much pace for me. Pause it. Huh? Obviously, I paused it. I didn't care. What?

You could pause it earlier and go, Luke. Maybe pause it before. The race is still going on. I was too... Sorry, Max. Hang on. I need to maybe pause it before I was too sorry Max hang on I need to clean this up sorry guys overtakes on I've just shit myself mate sorry

box box there's a shit in my box I tell you that for free no yeah so and sometimes I just like stewing in my own fart but obviously I just left it it was I remember it the push up

and I went straight away I was like I've shit myself did you get like to the butterflies where you're like shit no I just thought I've shit myself

I have shit myself in a weird way that might be one of the like the most manly thing you've ever said like you're on your own playing xbox nothing

with beer yeah no i wasn't drinking i wasn't drinking i'd stop drinking that's your definition of masculinity you know how many

you want to see on the be a man i had a glass of water and a snus playing f1 that is probably the least manly thing ever

when you just shit your pants after eating. Yeah. This is what annoys me because you do your vlogs. This is what we need on the vlogs. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you should have

logged that. No, no, no, you have to vlog it. Osmo 3 covered in poo. Yeah, that was it. That was it. While I was trying to keep my shitty boxes off my arse,

I thought, let me go and get my camera. Nah, you should have had the camera after. Just show yourself, lads. Not mad yourself. Guys, I've just shit myself. Yeah, you should have done that camera after the joke. Just shut myself, lads. Not mad yourself. Guys, I've just shit myself. Yeah, you should have done that.

You really need to vlog your terrible... To be honest, I was that degraded and... I know, but we could have seen the raw emotion of him just being disappointed. I didn't fancy...

To be honest, the last thing on my mind was filming it. Do you know what? I wish you had, like, had it on the tripod just, like, naturally. Imagine you were just, like,

vlogging. You were vlogging. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Paying effort. I'm just going to get up now. You see? Honestly, yeah, it's so bad.

Yeah, my life is shit. Okay. How much money do you reckon you can make in 24 hours if you start from zero? Genuine question. Oh, 24 hours.

What? Doing what? Anything? Yeah, but it has to be free or like you can't are you in your current situation so like

are you just an average person or are you us four you can use whatever I reckon five grand you get straight on cameo and do something as well

no no do betting ads you can't use advice that you've already bought yeah maybe he's right no do ads on TikTok and Insta

I feel like you want to put it as you're just a normal person just working, you know, a standard job. I'd say, do you want anything for lunch?

I'll go get it for you if you give me a quid. Yeah, and then how are you flipping that? No, you've got to pump. I'll fuck this quid for that chair.

Well, no, we don't do that deal. I'm not selling that. Sorry. No, I'm not selling that. And also,

can you get help, please? That face is so irritating. What the fuck is that face you're pulling? Is that a new face? Is that a new face? That face you pulled was like... Yeah, there's a strange bald man

trying to buy a chair for a pound downstairs. Oh, he's the other homeless guy again. Just get rid of him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'd be the funniest. Well, funny, you reached peak masculinity, obviously, over the weekend, but so did Lewiswis oh just skipping over my entire question now i suppose uh i'll be honest to answer your question um i'll keep fire from the hip it's fine i'll bring a few more

wait so i'm not allowed i'm not in my current state i think you just start from scratch you're just like in a town center somewhere You've got no phone on you and you just have to Can I just shoot myself? No gun either. What about have I not got

money in my bank account? No you have to just like use your human resources. Go to Trafalgar Square, sit on the floor with a hat

and I bet in an hour you can make a couple of quid. Then you've got Oh it looks horrendous. You give him money. Brilliant. Luke so what do you got over the weekend oh yeah um well use like medals on this show so you know we've had marathon medals i didn't even bring mine we've got half iron man medals you got a medal

fuck off they gave you that that looks like this we're gonna clap it's backwards that's what the playoff final medal, that is. Is it gold? Real gold? Real gold, yeah. I don't know if that's impressive or embarrassing

that they made a medal. What do you mean? I've done the impossible. We only made five of these, guys, so no more cyclists. I rode 60 kilometres on a bike. I'd say with no training,

that's probably more I'm hearing that's more impressive than Theo's half Ironman. Some people have said that to me. They have said Lewis the fact that you

literally have one leg you know and zero Yeah one leg no training and you rode 60km up the steepest hills

in the UK That's easier than that's definitely easier than training your whole life for a half Ironman and getting beat by going in a wheelchair

yeah yeah yeah I'm sorry that wasn't us saying it though I'm sorry

you here should we read some of the messages loose and over the weekend it was

the it was a difficult treacherous challenge we were one mile in

by the way yeah I actually had I couldn't I couldn't keep it I didn't

even read any of the chat have you got my kit by the way are you going to return it or what have you kept it oh my god I left you I couldn't keep it. I didn't even read any of the chat. Have you got my kit, by the way? Are you going to return it or what? Have you kept it?

Are we talking about next time? Oh my God. I left you a bag and a jacket and you can't even return it. You wanted that back. No, I got the jacket. I came up to WhatsApp. There was like 150 messages in the group chat and you're talking about cycling.

I'm going to read some of these messages from Lewis Bowden, who, by the way, is number one hater of running and cycling. Sitting here in a High Rocks. rock but i'm also champion of both lewis puts in the group chat this is lovely actually bit of countryside you can chat get a coffee and cake i love it definitely defo going to be something i do regularly after surgery did he i really enjoyed it did he actually put that yeah i did but like the thing is uh there was a moment where i love the lycra yeah no but like the thing is there was a moment where it was

I love the lycra yeah no that is not a comment there's a bit where you have to go in and like meet at my cafe so they can check we're not dead or whatever because it's a dangerous challenge

and like I was there and I was like we were chatting I was like look it's so nice you can just ride next to each other you have a chat you see a bit of the countryside have a nice coffee and cake

and then I was like realise what I just said out loud whilst wearing lycra and a fucking helmet. And then you also put in the chat. But I have to be honest to myself. I'm a cyclist. Mate,

how long did it take you to do 60K? Oh, what's the world record? It was a while. It was, Ian was thinking we'd do it in two and a half hours. I think we got halfway

in about two hours. She did 30K? Mate, the hills were the steepest things you'll ever see. I've put it all so you'll see it later on

Tour de France doesn't have hills like that they don't mate I swear to god no I know they don't they have way worse the first hill

I remember me and Elliot were going you can hear him in his stalky accent it's like fucking hell and like he's pulling off no he said fucking hill

fucking hill mate they were brutal they were like this they definitely were. They defied the laws of physics, the fact that I got up them. 30% is quite steep,

but it's not that. No, mate. And do you know what the worst thing is? It's like when you climb a mountain and you get to one peak and there's another peak. How many mountains have you climbed? On that bike ride, like seven.

But it's like you go around the corner and it's like there's another bit. Yeah, they're never ending. Was it 400 metres of elevation you ended up doing? I don't know. Yeah, you were actually net downhill for... Yeah, Tom're never ending. Was it 400 metres of elevation you ended up doing? I don't know. Yeah, you were actually net downhill. Yeah, Tom, that was the funniest thing he did.

Like if you looked at his elevation gain, his descent was way more than gain. So he actually spent more time going downhill. The thing is though, do you know what's annoying? I was told there was no hills in Stoke, so I was a bit pissed off. And we were going and then it was just like a big one and then a big one and it was just like a big one and then a big one

and it was just like downhill then a massive one again but like you know that's why I'm such an inspiration when are you joining the tour? when are you going? it's not below my level

it's in July isn't it? I've done the Stoke to Burton 60k I'm not going to do Tour de France now is that a winner's medal or participation? participation participation?

that's a winner medal so you won out of the medal so you won the group no it was a it was a participation on a level though so you cycled 60k you actually had a great time do you think it's something you would take up i actually do because do you know what i think running shit because i know it's running shit because you can't talk you just out of breath cycling so you're just like riding down hills and you can talk and see the country, get a cake,

a coffee, Tom. Cycling is definitely better than running, but they're both fucking hit. It's the outfits that make me cringe the most. No, no, you wore lycra, man.

You're part of the lycra. It was so bad, though. You look like a dick. I think I would rather wear huge jumpers that squail in the wind and make your job harder. Squail in the wind?

Squail in the wind. What noise is that? Go for it. That does sound like a squire. That is a squire. Or you wear a nice thin lycra that makes you go super speedy. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts.

Here's a show that we recommend. Ever heard a story so wild you just had to know if it was true? I'm Alexa Steele from Degrassi, and on Steele My Story, we put celebrity guests to the test. Join me and comedian Ian Fisher as we play a hilarious game of true or stolen story. Our guests share two stories, one from their own life and one they, shall we say, borrowed? Can you guess which one really happened to them? Subscribe to Steal My Story on the Sonar Network or wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com

But actually, after the cycle... Actually. Actually, actually, actually. You're going to like this because I actually had to... How many actually's are you going to say? I actually had to... Oh my God, stop saying that. You love actually.

Acast. Oh God. I actually had oh my god stop saying that you love actually there you go oh god I had to get a train from Tom's train station and I often do

give him a bit a little bit of jib and jive no he doesn't go from Birmingham does he yes I thought you

go from wait how do you get to Birmingham I thought you go from your local area a small train there

I'll get from Stourbridge to Birmingham then Birmingham to London I always give Tom a bit of hassle mcgastle after he's Is it from your local area? A small train there. I'll get from Starbridge to Birmingham and then Birmingham to London. Ah, you're on Jackie. I always give Tom a bit of Hassel Magasel

after he's late. Yeah, because you have no consideration for other people's travel journey. In the Birmingham station, did you go to that cafe which they shout at you?

Oh, Karen's Diner? No. No. People don't go to that. No. We did get stopped by Jobsworth who,

oh my God. So we had the bikes there, right? And we had, we were going to't get to that. No. And we did get stopped by a jobs with who, Oh my God. So we had the bikes there, right? And we had, we were going to get on the train. We had tickets for the train and stuff. And the guy stops us. So he's like,

Oh, have you got a booking for the thing? I'm like, no, mate. Oh, we just got in. Have you got a booking for the bike rack?

I was like, no, he's like, Oh, I've got no bikes booked on. I'm like, okay, can we book on then?

He's like, you have to go up to the kiosk and get a booking. I was like, mate, it's the trains here in seven minutes. And he's like, can we book on then he's like you have to go up to the kiosk and get i was like mate it's the train's here in seven minutes and he's like can we just put it on you said there's no one booked on and he's like oh well if someone books what people book on on the way i'm like yeah the fucking gb olympic biking team i'm gonna get like 15 slots from here to london houston and we're like right we'll just get off at that point then he's like no i can't take that risk i'm like he's such, no, I can't take that risk. I'm like, he's such a dickhead.

Honestly, there was one the other day, similar to that, where one of my trains got cancelled that I'd got the ticket for. So obviously got the next one, got on and I've showed the ticket. They're like, that was, I said, it got cancelled, mate.

I know, but what you should have done is gone upstairs, got your ticket. I said, mate, it's your fault. You said it's your company's fault the train was cancelled. I'm not going to go and change my ticket when I've got a ticket here. I said, that's completely your responsibility as a company. No, but I should really fine you. And I said, mate, if you fine me, I'm not paying it, so it's up to you.

And he went, oh, well, I'll let you off this time, but next time if a train gets cancelled. So, all right, I'm waiting on the platform for my train, it gets cancelled, I've got to go all the way up to the ticket office and get my ticket changed. What the fuck you on about?

How about I just go? How about I just go, yeah, no problem, mate, and walk on, you fucking busy prick. I hope you're watching this, Dave.

And what happened to you, did you do that or did you just say, sorry, go into the kitchen? We were more thinking it. Anyways, someone went up to try and swap over,

we were just having to get onto a different train. Meanwhile, he comes over and tries to make a chat about the bike. After I'm like, that was more annoying because it was like, right, you know you've pissed us off. Okay, you've done your job. You got your way. And now he's trying to crack on about the bike and be made. I just wanted to clear off. We got onto the next train.

We were... Wait, you missed that train? Yeah, we missed it because he was a dickhead. I understand doing your job, right? I understand doing your job right I understand doing your job but how about just thinking common sense common sense

let's just do not everyone's going to book on no one's going to find out let's just do a nice deed clearly you just came back from somewhere also what's he going to do get the British Transport Police

on me just fucking fuck off you boring fuckers when you walk with a bike by the way on trains it's happened twice now because I had to get there and back

as soon as they see you with a bike they come rushing over where are you going they're proper on you it's like fuck off that is your own fault though for getting a

boy on the train now you know what it's like to be a cyclist oh yeah you're so victimised by the world the cars are nasty

it's crazy cars get off me fucking you know each week now he's coming with a new like a car almost killed me

yeah I was getting targeted at a train station I did almost die in the car you've become everything you've

hated I did almost crash into a car I do actually remember when I went on a bike ride with my mate years ago, the clipping ones. Do you remember when I told you when I fell? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You did clipping?

Yeah. It was during the summer, so I was trying to keep my fitness up for when I was playing footy. And I remember after I'd done the old Only Fools and Horses fall, like this other bit, we were cycling down this road, and I was nowhere near the middle of the road i was just in front of this car anyway this car fucking beeps me so i kind of swerve nearly nearly fucking like fall off so we get to the lights i

was like what are you doing mate and he's like this uh older guy he's probably like my dad's age he's like i was just beeping you to let you know you weren't right on the side of the road. I went, what? I said, you made it more dangerous by beeping me. Then I panicked, swerved. And he's like, you don't need to get angry. I said, what are you on about? I said, you gaslighted me. Yeah, literally gaslighted. That's what you do to me.

I was like, do you know? I said, I wasn't angry, but now I am. I'm just happy, man. You know, I've got more cyclist friends to come with me during my training rides. I've got you, I've got Proddy. I'm excited, man. You, maybe.

Yeah, I'm already, yeah. That's come a long time. What a fun group that is. No, but actually on the train itself, right, we were sat down and there was like two tables, right?

The entire carriage fucking empty. This geezer comes on. They smell, yeah? Yeah, they're sure you're coming, mate. This geezer comes on. A slightly like,

bigger than average human. Fat bastard. Anyways, he comes over and he's like i can't fucking comprehend this we're sat here and he chooses out of all the places that sit right next to us he's carrying this big box of fucking chicken wings oh get involved me gets it out i swear to god this guy is smashing down chicken wings right on our table, like, so unnecessarily next to us. The Black Mirror

saw experiment, mate. Fucking stinks. Anyways, finishes his chicken wings, lies back, goes to sleep, starts snoring his fucking ass off.

I'm like, this guy has came onto an empty carriage, chosen to sit right next to us, scuffed about 20 chicken wings, passed out from it and started snoring the entire day he obviously doesn't

give a fuck about what anyone else thinks when I said that happened to me and I said to the bloke what are you doing why don't you go sit over there

why didn't you say that no because he could say nothing and then bitch about it what the hell what would you mind was it actually empty oh no no

it definitely was I don't know if he just wanted a table not one of you went no so the way the seating plan was, there was Elliot and me, and then Ian had this little bit.

So admittedly, we're taking up two tables, but the entire carriage is fucking empty. So unless he just... So there's probably like four of the tables. Do you know what I think it was? It was like he had his ticket because he was looking at it. So his ticket must have said

to be right with us. Oh, yeah. It's like... Yeah, no, but are you going to follow all the rules in your life? Also, he might have actually had like train anxiety, so his ticket must have said to be right with us. Oh yeah. It's like following this. Yeah no but are you going to follow all the rules in your life? Also he might have actually had like train anxiety

where he's too scared to sit on his own and he falls asleep. Oh shut up mate. In case he falls asleep he did fall asleep. Go and fucking eat your wings down there

you fat fucker. I actually kind of read it from the fact that like that guy's living a great life. Did you ask for one? Didn't offer. That's rude isn't it?

At least if you're going to sit with me offer me a chicken wing. Yeah. I can't believe you shit your pants and didn't say anything and then you've come on this podcast to bitch about it.

Yeah. That's a very British thing to do, that. Good stuff. Yeah, but it's just rude to say a bitchy thing to do. Do you want to move, mate? Did you speak to him at any point? Just say, mate.

Or literally say, why don't you go and sit down there? Why are you sitting there? Oh, that's weird, mate. If he's not even been through it. Just had his headphones in, yeah. Yeah. Did he touch you? No. it. Just had his headphones in, yeah. Yeah. Did he touch you?

No. Well, I was in Paris over the weekend. City of love. Okay. Go on. Pretty cool. All right. Nice.

What's the marathon? Paris Marathon. Saw Brodie do well. You watched the marathon. That is enthralling, mate. Yeah, my brother ran it. Oh, did he? What was his time?

4.31. 4.31. First his time uh 431 so he beat your pr yeah no yeah is that your pr no why do you always

gotta shut people down for look at you sorry look at you sorry you're swearing i'm sorry

you're angry sorry shitting yourself i'm sorry yeah long hard look at you so maybe go on a bike ride with lewis

well even tom you said earlier he had an angry poo when what you earlier he had an angry poo. When? What? You said he had an angry poo when he came back in. It was angry from the poo,

not an angry poo. He had an angry poo. My memory's getting worse. Why? Because I was trying to think of what I did on the weekend. I just had to look at my calendar. Because you're spending

too much time with me. By the way, can I just say, on the back of... I beg your fucking pardon. Sorry, we'll come back to that. But on the back of last episode, do you know when we made a pinky promise

to go out on the night out? Yeah, yeah, it's true, you know. Oh, yeah, mate. Oh, my recovery is 5%. No, I didn't say that. I genuinely fell asleep. Oh, yeah, bro. What Reeve did was ignore my message all day.

No. When it was too late to go out, really. You sent me a message when I was asleep. Do you know what's funny, Lou? Do you know what's funny? Do you know that?

You're gaslighting me now. I messaged you very early on. Do you know what's funny? I guarantee you, yeah, it said you were online. He sent a text and it said, and he disappeared.

All of a sudden, he just didn't open it. I know the old tricks of the truth. I text you something and it says online and no reply and he goes offline. I have evidence old tricks of the truth. I see it a lot. I text you saying, and it says online, and no reply, and he goes offline.

I have evidence of being asleep at that point. Oh, okay. Show me your evidence. Evidence of being asleep. Oh, shut up, mate. Just admit it. You didn't want to see him, and you just decided to ignore him instead.

It's okay. See, one thing I can take is rejection. I apologize for it. Another thing I can't take is for ignoring him or fake sleeping. It's a broken pinky promise. Deception. That's what that is

maybe he needed maybe he needed that drink with you he needed to talk to you that's like really emotional no we're talking about lying he said he bought a pint for me which was quite clearly

a fine bit for himself I actually did buy him a pint thinking he was going to turn on I believe Lewis I messaged you at two o'clock right

we finished the record probably was at one yeah yeah no no I'm talking about the ones no no 2 o'clock. Right. We finished the record probably at 1. Yeah. Yeah, no, no. I'm talking about the ones... No, no. The few going to local round here after there's a nice beer garden.

Yeah, yeah, that's fine. Like 5. And you didn't reply till 5.56. Wait, can we... Okay, now get your receipts for when you were sleeping. Shall we go to sleep?

Let's see it. Let's see the 2 o'clock nap, shall we? Because I know, I know. No, no, no. Let's see the two o'clock nap, shall we? Because I know, I know. No, no, no. Let's see the two o'clock nap. Because he was shooting

in the afternoon, I know. Weren't you filming? I was asleep. At quarter past four. To six. We said to meet at five. But he messaged you two hours earlier.

You didn't reply to that message. You didn't even read it. Yeah, yeah, that's fine. Well, I didn't see it. Oh, changing the story. I told you I was fine. Well, I didn't see it. Oh! Changing the story! I told you I was asleep. Two hours off.

Your response was, you might be dead. You fell asleep two hours after he messaged you. He needed that pipe, man. That's fucking bad. He actually didn't, though. He went out with everyone

from the fellow studios. You needed that. Yeah, but he wanted to go out with you. He needed your friendship there, your kinship. Well, yeah, well, you think it's friendship. Oh, you know what?

I used to like you. Sorry, anyways. You should have texted me later. I would would have been there you didn't even drink on the fucking app that's not my fault what's wrong with not drinking i still but if he said he was gonna be there he would have been there i would have come for a zero percent beer anywho yeah you went anything else happening out in front some paris were you doing shit any nice meals snails I tried a snail! Yeah, they're nice, aren't they? Oh, they're class. Apparently snails are the most, what do you call it,

like, sustainable food. Because there's more snails than anything in the world. That can't be true. That's apparently. It's one of the most sustainable foods.

What do you mean sustainable foods? Who's grown snails for? There's more snails than anything in the world. I'm sorry, that can't be true. I think they're like,

imagine being, imagine being, imagine being the first person to look at a snail there's more snails than anything in the world I'm sorry that cannot be true but what do you not think though like sure mosquitoes are better to eat imagine being or fucking fish imagine being the first person to like look at a snail on the floor go yeah I'll have that oh that doesn't surprise me at all

I imagine humans look to any I think the cow milk is the weirder one yeah like or like looking at a bison going fuck you know take him down and eat that

there's meat there a snail on the floor it's food it's a living thing it's food anything's food really do you know what? Native Americans

with the bison, they'd eat every single part of it. Like, not one bit would go to waste. Some cultures still do eat every part of every... Yeah, Joe Rogan does.

Like, monkey brains get eaten in, like, fucking China or something. Indiana Jones, yeah. What? Why'd you have to make it weird and just, like, not believable?

What are you talking about? Indiana Jones? So the thing that isn't believable is me saying they eat monkey brains in Indiana Jones. Yeah, because it's not a movie. That's not believable. It's a movie.

I said in different... How's that not believable? I said it... Do you believe that happened It's not a culture, is it? Yeah, but it's a fictional character. Yeah, but it still happened. How's that not believable?

No, I said in certain cultures they eat monkey brains like I think in China and you went, Indiana Jones? Yeah, you didn't. To be I think in China, and you went, Indiana Jones. Yeah, you didn't. To be fair, when you said it, you just said Indiana Jones. You didn't actually specify. It is Shrek eats slugs.

Let me see where it was for you. I'm not denying it. We're not denying it. I was reporting it. Indiana Jones. No, don't act. What country did they eat the monkey brains in? India.

In a fictional place called Pankok Palace. It's worth noting that the scene is highly fictionalized and has been criticized for its cultural insensitivity and inaccurate portrayal of Indian cuisine

and customs. Oh my God. Inaccuracy portrayal of Indian cuisine and customs. It's just not a real thing he's actually just offensive yeah yeah yeah

probably went and got a good time there he actually smashed it to be fair what did he get 323 pretty quick like yeah he was pretty quick

like pretty big he went beast mode he actually went ultra beast mode yeah Jake Dearden pacing him will you ever outgrow that phrase

no I actually just enjoy it and do you know what I think it's got a good message got beast mode I agree with the sentiment I just think it no I actually just enjoy it and I do know I think it's got a good message got beast mode I agree with the sentiment I just

think the words are annoying just say it GBM I'm going to create that as a brand GBM

beast mode oh he's coming for your thing mate what the frick you stole it as well you stole it off

chip you got deep side with Proddy oh yeah and you chatted shit about Lewis I heard you saying this did he chat shit about me He just seen it off chip. You got deep side with Proddy. Oh yeah, and you chatted shit about Lewis. Yeah, I heard you saying this.

Did he chat shit about me? No, no, no. So number one, he didn't go to drinks with me. Then he's chatting shit about me. What did he say? He said,

Lewis cares about what everyone thinks of him and he's very insecure. That's exactly what he said. Do you think I'd actually say that? I don't know what to believe because I never thought he'd go back on a pinky promise. Yeah, yeah.

No, I'll let you off for that one, but look me in the eyes. Do you think I actually said that? Why are you getting so defensive? I think anything he'd go back on a pinky promise. Yeah. No, I'll let you off for that one but look me in the eyes. Do you think I actually said that? Why are you getting so defensive? I think anything's possible. I think you're right. Okay.

You only get defensive when you know what you said is true. Yeah, that is true. He hasn't got defensive to be honest. I said that I care too much and I said that I think you three don't care what people think of you

which is what I'd like to be. I don't think that's true. Oh, no. I think... I probably actually I don't think that's true. Oh, no, I think... I probably actually did say he thinks that Tom... Oh, no, maybe it was you, actually. Maybe that's where you're getting it from.

Probably said that he thinks you care, but you pretend that you don't. No, I actually don't. I've said it on here. I don't care if someone, like, says all, like, bad shit about me. It's like when they say, like, the show's not good

or the quality's not been good here, then I... Because that's like... It's if they criticise my work. I don't care if they think i'm a knob fucking yeah but that's yeah caring yeah no i i do but it's not like i'm hiding when they call me annoying or whatever and i'm like hiding that that gets to me like i don't give a shit about that i don't care about insults but everyone has their one thing yeah yeah it's more the it's more intelligence that i get annoyed by people thinking i'm an idiot but you know you do reply to insults though where

on pitch side no i don't it's only if they're questioning if it's only if it's like an intelligence question then oh why do you care though i don't know i've you've listened to the whole thing why you bring it up again i haven't listened to the whole thing i haven't why do you care though why i think you're smart everyone around you but i think i think it's maybe from childhood because i was in a group of people that were definitely way more smarter than i am they're all doctors and lawyers and stuff now so you're trying to prove yourself constantly so i don't think about growing that since childhood to be honest it would explain when you saw the angriest i've ever seen you on the show when it was about the monkey mammoth. Yeah, yeah.

Not a mouse mammoth. Yeah, yeah. I think that's totally... Everyone has one thing that they're totally insecure about. But you are smart. No, but it's the insecurity of wanting to be seen as smart.

I think that's the issue. Why do you care about being seen as smart, though? I shouldn't. That's the whole point I'm bringing up. That's the thing I'm making. I really shouldn't, but it gets to me. He doesn't want to be.

The only thing that really triggers me is when people think I'm less intelligent than I am thing I'm making I really shouldn't but it gets to me he doesn't want to be the only thing that really triggers me is when people think I'm less intelligent than I am I think saying out loud relieves it of the power yeah of course of course people think

I'm genuinely like borderline like you know there's got to be something that triggers you there's got to be something that

triggers you or like if I got really. There's got to be something that triggers you. I got really hurt when people questioned my morals about the leak thing. Well, there you go. I never said I don't not get triggered by it. No, but did I? I'm just admitting to the same thing. You should know that you're smart. Yeah, but you should know you've got good morals.

Yeah, you should know you're a good person. You should know that you're a good person. But I had hundreds of people calling my morals. Same thing. That's the same thing. People know, Reece, but I feel like you only get like no but it's exactly the same when i had this conversation with you at the cube and you were like when i had to reassure you you are a good person a good friend like you should that's the same with him like we're getting a bit too deep here guys everyone knows most people know he's intelligent and he, he, he, he himself knows intelligent, but also what,

what I'd say to you is the re again, I haven't heard the podcast. I only care about, um, what people I know think. Yeah. Yeah. Then I do really care.

I care what my friends think of my family. I, I can honestly say I couldn't give a shit what people on the internet. I said, I don't know why I said that about you. But it's a bit, the reason you shouldn't is because half of them, half of them don't even believe what they're saying, right? They say it for a reaction or they say it just to be seen.

If someone calls you stupid, they don't probably actually mean it. They're just saying it because it's so much, half the time people say the most outlandish things to either be seen or heard. Like they don't, their lives are shit. Like if you know, it's true. If you're going out your way to comment on a post abuse or something about

someone who you don't know or go or DM them abuse, your life is shit because you don't do that. You don't do that. You don't do that. I don't do that because we actually have a life. We have friends. We, we,

we do things. So we're not going around abusing people because we don't just sit at home with no friends thinking oh how can i get some attention off this youtuber i'll call him i'll call him fat i'll call him stupid i'll say that yeah that's what not not our lovely viewers but that's what some that's what a lot of the internet is become and also with the internet like when we were growing up you'd never say half the things these people say say to people's faces because you get your head kicked in yeah and i have had many fucking slaps off people because i'm a cheeky fucker like but they've grown up on the internet

where you're protected behind your little phone so you can say anything you want i had someone dm the other day saying they want to r word my sister and it's like that that could really like bother some people but i'm like you're a saddo mate like you're an absolute saddo yeah that's why we joke about you replying to comments all the time because we shouldn't you should but you i also do love it i love when i get a dm no but you do love you don't you shouldn't need to because that's you're giving them the reaction that they want yeah yeah i mean you're giving i'm aware I'm self-aware of the whole thing you should get to

the point where you read the comments don't you think if I he wouldn't say it yeah but you should try to know why

I think he goes the way I picture it is it's like John Severance where it's like I think there's another Reeve that comes out

when he sees that comment and he blanks out and you forget you've heard it try and read the comments you get I get called

like a seabomb every day oh mate so you should just I'm fine with insults if people just want to if there's not

personally attacked just work on the page man yeah sometimes it is fun to reply to abusive DMs because you see how quickly they

change yeah yeah if I'm bored I'll be like uh hi mate what's I'll be like I don't know might, what's, what, um,

I'll be like, I don't know. I've got, what's one I did the day. And I just replied to it being like, hi mate. Uh, sorry.

You feel like that. Glad, uh, glad you're a fan though. With a thumbs up. He's like, Oh, sorry,

mate. Didn't think you'd see. It was only joking. Haha. Keep the content up. I was like, you just called me. The words you've just called me are like fucking so abusive.

And now suddenly, cause I'm, cause again, all he wants is to be like heard or seen because again I'm no fucking I don't know

I've nearly said Indiana Jones I meant to say I'm not Indiana Jones guys I'm no Brad Pitt but in his head he's thinking

oh my god I've got a reply from Tom Garrett I've got one up on him and it's like you're a saddo you fucking fat loser the feedback from that podcast

has been insane though yeah and I don't know whether or not we should be more honest in what we do or we just continue down the road that

I think we can have the thing is I don't think you can force honest conversation sometimes yeah of course but do you not want to make like a genuine

I know we make a genuine impact on people's lives by entertaining them and you know giving them the stuff that they want to see from what we offer yeah but what do you mean

you can do that but every show has its purpose yeah I know I get it yeah yeah I'm honest all the time yeah this show is more like

for laughs and jokes and whatever but you would do some serious I'm coming on in deep in my life I don't do that in normal life let alone

no I don't want to do more of that be open to do it here if you want we'll discuss it. Do you remember the brand that popped up while you were scrolling your social feed? No, but I bet you remember

who sponsors your favorite podcast. That's because 74% of listeners recall the brands they hear when listening to podcasts. If you want your business to be top of mind, podcast advertising with ACAST is the way to go. Book your campaign today by visiting go.acast.com slash ads. But like, you can do the Friday show.

No, I know. I get there's a time and a place for everything. I just, you know. You're getting getting you're 30 yeah mate I've crossed the bridge also I don't particularly I would never want people

to know what does actually get to me or not no I'm not I'm not even necessarily talking about that I'm just talking about do you know what it's like

when I said on here it was like oh someone says the camera is shit or whatever that gets me and then all the comments on the next one

were like slating it and Charlie actually messaged me saying oh they're really pulling apart this pod I'm like no it's because I said it on the episode it actually just makes

it makes me feel like I don't care about I'm well prepared for what's going to happen off the back of it I think you're different I know but because they're doing it on purpose

I think you're different now I think these comments will not do that in backside because they really care for you but even pitch side they will start increasing maybe what do you think

before Lewis sets over you you want what I can't remember be more like open be more like more. Oh yeah. No, but I feel like if that's not the place that the show is,

you just leave. No, no, no. We just carry on doing what we're doing. I just feel like we have it. I just feel like with the people that we have, we have a little bit of a duty of care and I'd love to like,

do that. Then you can open up if you want. I won't be. I'll open up. Yeah. Open up, open up if you want I won't be I'll open up yeah open up open him up open up no don't

no we tried that we fucking we tried that then it's like right open him up now yeah but we tried that it didn't work no the problem with that is

because like there was nothing to open up there when we had the therapist in it was more jokey it's like I don't care Tom calls me a verb so when you were trying to get me to open up on my emotions on it

I disagree I see again if he gets opened up properly I think there'll be like a catastrophe you did start to get rattled a bit though in that

episode no it's because we kept like it's like you wanted something from me which I would have had to faked it for me to be like oh yeah if you if you

open up it's like Pandora's box I think like everything will come out no but every joke every joke has truth behind it yeah what about me being a worm?

No. You could spend two years in Afghanistan, mate. There's no like, there's a lot going on. No, my thoughts are kind of organised, man. Every single time,

when I'm a whore. There is not a thought in that. No, there's no organisation. No, when I ride home on my bike ride, I'll throw on my playlist, my thinking playlist. What's that?

What does that consist of? My thinking playlist. It has... Music or like... Get my life into pieces! This is my last resort! Your audiobook's all music. No, no, it's like, it's more ambient music,

but it's like, I've listened to it ever since... It's like Dovan. It's what I've listened to, though, ever since I was like 16, 15 or whatever. Like when I was like thinking and like my time is up my time is now wait every time we see you on the line bike you've got me over in your ear man no not me or been but i used to it's weird because i listen to it and then because i've

listened to it throughout my life whenever i'm trying to think what i'm trying to do it like takes me back yeah time to play the game I've done this song no because I used to I used to have in my bedroom I used to have like a big fucking whiteboard on my wall and I'd be like

that's what I'd write ideas on fucking now you can see what you're most people have footballers or like pastry models

you had a whiteboard to write your thoughts on I had a huge whiteboard on my wall has anything come of that like stuff that you wrote down? A lot of them have turned,

some things have turned into features and games that we've used. A game, when we did, all of our work though. Yeah. When we did, the boot,

that was a rip off of an old, You're a productive master, aren't you? You're actually a saddo. He came to a pub the other day and got his laptop out. You're a saddo, look at that.

Sad act, absolute sad act. So, any more questions? By the way, on the note of opening up, I've just been called a saddo look at that sad act absolute sad act so um any more questions by the way on the note of opening up I've just been called

a saddo I was ready to listen go ahead go ahead do your thing no I know because this shows escapism for people

isn't it we don't need to yeah I can really relate to him talking about the music though yeah go on I used to

during my A levels and now actually every time I listen to this album I really-levels, and now actually every time I listen to this album, I really like, I can lock in and like I can really concentrate on something.

Yeah, music gives you moments. No, but it's a really specific album. What are we doing here? I listen to it on repeat on my A-levels. What is this conversation we're having? It's Machine Gun Kelly, Laced Up.

What the fuck? I know like every word to all of these songs. No way. Mine's more like Bon Iver and stuff. Oh, so you cry no no it's weird though because i used to walk my dog and i'd like be walk my dog and think of what the fuck am i doing my life and i was like 17 now listen that same song now i'm like oh

and then i've got like i used to journal a lot when i still do really but i used to journal a lot through that period so i've got like loads of journal entries where I look back and I'm like, fucking hell, this is mental. See, this is the problem. The problem is this is why we can't do it on this show because it's polar opposites of vulnerability.

I think that's a good dynamic. Because it is actually very different. But do you know the difference of me going, oh, I'm really insecure about X, Y, Z. And he goes,

you know what? I totally understand that, mate. This is absolutely like absolutely like it's a term and then you do it wait so i have to like i heard on um i had on my tiktok the other day that come up you know that we are young uh yeah and that took me back to my prom, my after prom, when we went into a field and I fingered a girl. Brilliant.

It's just not the same. Do you know the Taylor Swift Bon Ivo song? Anyways. I don't like that one. Let's talk about it. Open up to the deep side. Oh, no, it's fine.

But you can do that on your main channel. Yeah, I did do that. Yeah, so back off. Yeah. That's what I was saying. It doesn't have to be this platform. People enjoy us for what we are. No, no, no. I don't think it's bad to do it. Yeah, so back off. Yeah. That's what I was saying. It doesn't have to be this platform. People enjoy it for what we are.

No, no, no. I don't think it's bad to do it on here. People enjoy it. I think because people might be going through some of the same stuff that you say and then they'll be like, ah. Ask a question you'd love to ask. About what?

Anything, man. It's your time to shine. Open. Or do you have something to say? Open the crevice. What's the one thing you've learned from going from your darkest point to where you are now that's why you can't ask my darkest point what do you say what's the question what's one thing you've learned from

that point in your life to now um oh the what's it called what's it called when you envy envy is like a killer okay so like beef of joy yeah because like I remember like oh man that's a good one

yeah because you can so easily look at other people in their position and it's like oh but then also that person might have like

like shit their own shit going on full picture and then yeah so it's like envy is really bad as well

because it makes you like such an awful person do you ever have deep conversations with your friends not really yeah

I do if they're struggling but do you think about deep things not really I never have conversations with people but I just

have it with itself does it make you feel uncomfortable or just no I just find it a bit like I find it just

sometimes cringe this is why I quite this is why I quite find it funny doing this around Tom. I just feel like... Because it's such a different perspective. No, mine's just like, if I've got an issue, I'll just deal with it myself. Yeah, you're the same as my brother. I don't really need to bore you all bird.

Because also, I feel like I have the answers to my issues. Right. So, I don't need it. If I needed help, I'd ask for help. Your response is what i realized when i went from my darkest points actually to go back to circle back to your original question there it's hard to do a deep conversation when you're doing therapy for my um my realization from my darkest moments obviously when you asked about that

were um it's actually not that deep yeah it's not what i took away from it i know it sounds very superficial but actually it's quite deep when you think about it it's nothing what I took away from it I know it sounds very superficial but actually it's quite deep when you think about it it's not that deep does that make sense yeah does that make sense

yeah I'm happy talking to my friends about like things they're going through deep and I feel like I'm a good friend

with that and help them with that but you'll never catch me talking to someone about anything yeah that's fine I never talk to anyone about it at all

like not even like Charlie oh so but like I don't know how you just start the conversation like oh Yeah, that's fine. I never talk to anyone about it at all. Like, not even like Charlie. Oh. So, but like, I don't know how you just start the conversation. You know what?

I think you're fine with cycling. Oh, no. No, it's true. It all comes back around, Sonny. Just watching horse racing. You're watching horse racing? Tom,

that is so fucking pure. See, this is why he doesn't have real problems. Get in! That's fucking horse problems. Get in! He has fucking horse problems. He actually just won 80 pounds.

No, more than that. I do a lot of my thinking. That's right, guys. I have the ability to think. I just don't have like a voice. But the difference is, is that I see things as visions. So I do that all on my running and my cycling.

Okay, fair enough. I mean, yeah, I'll just, I'll just, that's why I figure out. Jodie always says to me, she said, it's going to run. Yeah. It's going to run.

Yeah. It's not that I feel, it's not even my feeling comes. Well, I just think, I was only asking. I've used, I've used never like journaled or anything.

I have never. It is. It is the weirdest thing. Cause it is like opening up at like a time capsule because there's so many things that you've that you've done. Sorry. Woke up at 11,

went to the gym for the first time. No, no, that's not what it is. It's got to be deeper than that though. No, it's more about your thoughts.

But stop crying. There's nothing about No, no, it's more about It's analysing how you felt in those moments. Yeah, and then you go back and it's sort of like

it literally does teleport you back to where you were at one point it's really weird I laugh at that again I have no issue I have no issue with people doing that

but I couldn't think of anything worse it's weird because I'm more boring than that in mine I'm like referencing future Lewis yeah so in my journals

I'm like I'm referencing future Lewis reading this so when I read it back it's like it's breaking the fourth wall and then you read it back and and says do your tax it doesn't say that but i was even there's a picture of me like 10 year old where it's like hello future lewis so you sort of write it all on my school books where do you like journal i didn't get that

i've got hidden books in my flat so charlie. You've got to bring them in for the show. We've got to read them. Oh, you'd be like, oh, that is... You can't bring that up for nothing. No, please. No, there's... From like 10 years old. Hey, you've just...

You've turned around to me and said, oh, it's fine to be vulnerable and open on the show when it's so problematic. No, because this is like, no, no, because this wouldn't even be funny.

The user would just like be like, oh, Lewis. No, but that's what we want to see. Yeah, no, I want to laugh. No, no, no. no no no no you just said I won't find it funny I'll guarantee you

I'll do it alright how about this how about this we'll do a page a week one page no no I really

but when you were 10 it's not when I was 10 it's like probably it's like when I'm like I was like 15 16 onwards up until like through radio

and through you remember that age you're going through so much stuff yeah it's probably all a bit bipolar a bit like mental It's like 15, 16 onwards. Even better. Great age. Up until like through radio and through... Please bring me... Remember that age, you're going through so much stuff. Yeah. It's probably all a bit bipolar, a bit like mental going on there. Analyzing the mind of 16-year-old Lev Boden. Great age for journaling. Nah, that is...

I'd have to... I'd need to proofread it. I think I'd read one page and I'd be like, fuck that. There's so much going on. Oh, you've got to let us read that. You've got to. Nah. Come on, Luke.

That's cute. It's the future of the show. We're trying to progress it that's your next segment if you do that then I will I will come with a deep thought everybody I think

yeah I think he's that would be more vulnerable I think he's picturing something like that's going to be like I know it might make you cry right is that what you're doing

nah because like what you're writing there is normally like stuff you'd never tell someone else so ever so then to go on to a podcast can you see I don't think I have anything I wouldn't tell anyone No, because what you're writing there is normally stuff you'd never tell someone else. Yeah, it's passion, which is exactly why I want to read it.

I don't think I have anything I wouldn't tell anyone. So I don't even feel like I'm not vulnerable. I just don't have anything. I just told you a shit myself on my own. Go read it, and you can pick out the first page. If this was the way around, he'd make us bring it in. But I don't get what's bad.

I understand it's your inner feelings. I understand why it's very invasive. Right in a journal. It's very invasive but... Wait, look, I get it's very invasive but at the same time, it's ten years ago. No, it's not ten years.

Oh, shit, my pants. The difference is you didn't write it down. just this is the thing i'm more than happy to talk about stuff that embarrasses myself this is this is what embarrasses you always presume like i have i don't have that side to me because i never at all talk about or show it and then this would be like jumping from that point where people think i'm just a silly goofy guy to then seeing that I'm actually like do you not want people to see how you truly think

is that the issue I don't mind showing it I feel like it's mental do you know what it is it's all written in blood I don't think

people believe it he definitely doesn't believe it he doesn't think there's a thought in my head no I know there's too many

I want to dissect what you thought as an adolescent I think you're a fucking idiot. No, I think there's so much going on in your head that you don't know how to handle it. I think it'd be quite sad. When I read it, I'm like, this is just sad, Lewis.

But then it's like nice to look on. Oh, what, because you didn't achieve any of the goals you wrote down? No, I think it's actually more, it's more nice now looking at it because I've sort of went, I didn't do what I was aiming on, but I've sort of went beyond. That would only be like mine.

Then we should read it. We should read it. All my things at school were like, I'm going to be a professional footballer, I'm going to do I sort of went beyond it. That would only be like mine. Then we should read it. We should read it. And how about this? I'm going to be a professional footballer and I'm going to do this. Look at me now. For every page you read,

Oli will read two of his. Sure. Boring, Al. And I'll start journaling. I'll think about it. I'll go in and think about it. None.

Well, if you actually... They might not even want it. They might not even want it. You said you want this show to improve. They obviously want to see that, mate. If you're going to open it to the viewers, they might not even want it they obviously want to see that mate if you're going to open it to the viewers they're going to want it you get very uncomfortable though is everything okay no no i'm just thinking of all the people that are going to see this it's more like me mom and dad will read this and they'll be like don't don't read out anything to do with them

no they don't really they don't your thoughts how they thought you so they thought you were this happy i think charlie only features like once I'm like oh yeah I met a lass and then it just moves back onto my own you met her when you were 16 no I didn't know

all of them for when I'm 16 I think it's up until the journal now I'll come in every like four months it's normally now

nowadays it's talking about present day stuff nowadays it's more like if I need to process my thoughts a bit better I write it down

yeah am I in the journal at any point? Yeah, he's drawing it. Nah. He's drawing it. Other people rarely feature. Can I just actually

ask you a question quickly? You know you say you want to process your thought so then you write it down. What do you mean by that? So say you might feel Give me an example.

It's hard to think of a proper example but you might feel really stressed or something's not happening or something might So would you write down I'm feeling stressed because and it's my best advice that you can give to anyone genuinely if you have like if you've fucking got loads of stress and shit

um just start writing it down and you'll just as you write it down it like unloads it from your head and then like you write down because it helps your brain yes process your thoughts as an example i totally get exactly what you're saying, but I still want to see that book. Wait, as an example, can I, I'm a bit confused. So say I'm stressed about this bowl.

I say I'm, I'm stressed about this bowl. No, it's not like, it's not like linear. You don't just go, I don't like this bowl. It's more like, I might be really angry

about something that's happened. Yeah. And then like, I might start, the entry might start off angry and annoyed, but then as you're writing it, you become,

you can become more rational. What are you writing though? I don't get what you're writing I don't understand exactly what you feel yeah and then he says dear diary today

today I feel really angry I feel angry because Tom keeps insulting me imagine page one Tom's side called me a worm today that actually did help

me to understand that more the way you said that I was joking though no no but now I get it you might start annoyed then you can become more rational then you can start like plotting like this is what I'm going to understand that more the way you said that. I was joking there. No, no, but now I get it. You might start annoyed then you can become more rational then you can start like plotting

like this is what I'm going to aim for in the future. A lot of it is me setting myself goals that if I'm honest fucking a bit harsh on myself and then beating myself up for not reaching those goals. Oh, that's a healthy lifestyle.

And then doing that in a cycle but then but through doing that you get better. Right, are we ready for Gaz Gobble? Oh, fucking hell way to bring down the IQ

yeah sure man we are I think the score is 3-1 to you guys I don't know is it season 2 is it 3 yeah

obviously season 1 I won we'll do an all time score because 100 episodes in we'll get like it'll be 100 to 90

oh yeah that's true yeah we'll figure out I think I beat you 5-0 didn't I last time yeah just add

on first season I think it's way better so I think it's 6-3 to me I think I beat you 5-0, didn't I, last time? Yeah, just add on first season. I think it's way better. So I think it's 6-3 to me. I think. We will check the scores. The callbacking. Are you ready? Yes.

Yes, sir. Here are this week's headlines. Woman lived inside grocery store sign for a year. What the fuck? We're here. Say it again. Lived inside the sign. Woman lived inside grocery store sign for a year. What the fuck? Wait, again? Lived inside the sign. Woman lived,

lived inside grocery store sign for a year. I believe that. The great golden toilet heist. Teach me how to do that. Mansu psychic

for not warning him about lawsuit. Okay, right. Well, that's a self-prophecy. Can we get the third one first,

please? You want the lawsuit first? Yeah, yeah. So a local man has filed a 12,000. Can we get the third one first, please? You want the lawsuit first? Yeah, yeah. So a local man has filed a 12,000, this is in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Of course. A local man has filed a $12,000 lawsuit

against a psychic claiming she failed to predict he would file a lawsuit. He? He? What, the exact one that he's filing? Or just... He...

Wait, so he... She said... Long story short... You won't give me a lawsuit and he's gone and just he wait so he she said long story short give me a lawsuit and he's gone done it no no gregory fenn uh visited the psychic uh paid 85 dollars for a full tarot session uh she told me i'd meet so she told her she told him he'd meet someone this and that and he's claiming she never warned him. He was then going to file a lawsuit. Okay. So now he's suing her. I'll rate it.

I don't... These are hard ones. Do you get it? Yeah, it's going to be hard. What sign? What did he fail... What lawsuit did he fail to... The lawsuit...

Well, it doesn't say... The one that she didn't warn him about which one was that it doesn't actually tell me what which laws what he went he went to file a lawsuit against someone or something but he's he's he's now suing her as well because she didn't that makes sense he's got two open that's why I think it's believable yeah okay do you get what I mean so he's gone to do

a therapy session a week later he's filed a lawsuit on something for someone else then once he's filed that one he's gone hang on

she didn't tell me about this she didn't tell me I was going to do that so he's filed a lawsuit against her I've got it now so he's fucking

batshit crazy but you know the sign she's been living in that's a different one do you want that one yeah what sign how can a sign be that big right so it's America man America That shit crazy. Yeah. But you know the sign she's been living in? That's a different one. Do you want that one? Yeah. What sign? How can a sign be that big?

Right. So. It's America, man. America. Don't say that. Right. You should just run with it. In Midland, Michigan, a 34-year-old woman ingeniously turned the rooftop sign of a family fair grocery store into her home for nearly a year.

She furnished the small space with flooring, a desk, a pantry, and even a house plant. Despite having... Sign plant. Despite having a job and a car,

she chose this unconventional living arrangement, remaining undetected until store employees discovered her setup during routine maintenance. Yeah, that's 100% true. Logically, I don't know.

I don't see that. I think it's there. The golden toilet heist. Do you want to hear about that? We haven't heard that one. Come on, man. What sign? What supermarket?

I just said the Family Fair grocery store. That sounds... Family Fair grocery store. What does that even look like? I don't even understand how you can fit into a sign. How do you even produce a room from a sign? With flooring as well.

It's because you just fit in flooring. So what it could be, you know a lot of Tesco's have that roof, like triangle roof? Illuminati looking roof. You know what I'm talking about?

Yeah. The Tesco's always have the triangle brown roof. Right. It could be like in that and that's like on the sign. But that, no, no, no, no.

We have to bear in mind this is a headline. So if we go too deep into the sign, it might technically not be a headline in fairness. But the floor, fitting the flooring and stuff is a bit stupid.

But the difference between that and what are you saying about the Tesco and stuff is that already would have a bottom. It's obviously like a big hollow sign that's on the top of it, which has obviously got a space inside and she's started to fit it out

as a house. And maybe, like you say, it's flooring, but it might be just a big pranks award. We get cooked every week, but we're not picking the most logical one though. So I mean...

Let's talk about Golden Toilet Heist though. Right. So the Golden, the Great Golden Toilet Heist. In a caper that sounds like fiction, an 18 carat solid gold toilet valued at 5 million pounds was stolen from Blenheim Palace in Oxfordshire.

The lavish loo, titled America, was part of an art exhibition by Italian artist Maurizio Catalan, known for provocative works like the duct tape banana that sold for millions. The theft occurred in under five minutes, with the culprits breaking into the palace and forcibly removing the toilet, causing significant damage. Despite investigations, the toilet remains missing.

This, how could, do you know how heavy that would be? That sounds like a story, not a article. Do you know how heavy a golden toilet would be? Also, it can't be worth 5 million if it's only 18 carats. It's a 24 carat car, isn't it? The main one. Yeah, but it's a whole car. But do you know how heavy that would be?

How are they going to rob that in 5 minutes? It's heavy as fuck. It's heavy as fuck. It's a toilet made of gold. There might have been loads of them. Also, Blenheim Palace. I want to hear. Well,

no, no, it just means there's an art exhibition that helped. The only reason. I think he's been rumbled. I swear that I've seen like that duct tape banana. That's the way that was written. Sounds more like a story than an article.'s been actually rumbled it's not possible

we'd have heard of a golden toilet when did it happen it was in England too right yes Ben and Panna it was a lot of shit you know they do triathlons there

no date no date no one's went and stole it find out when it is a golden toilet would that not be on the British news

yes we don't know about it. 5 billion is a big heist. Even if it's in recent years, I'm always over weird headlines in this country. That's all that radio is. It's just fucking weird headlines. 5 billion pound heist on Blenheim Palace will be a lot.

Are we just overlooking the fact that the other two are American? Unless it's like a miniature toilet. Is it like a miniature toilet like this? 28th of February this year. Do you know how big? No way. No way. No way. How big is it? How big is miniature toilet? It's 28th of February this year. Do you know how big? No way. No way. No way.

How big is it? How big is the toilet? It's a toilet size. Is it like a human size toilet? Yes. No. No, it's fucking dwarf size. It could have been like small toilet.

Boys, we have to trust our gut that we would have heard about a five million pound golden toilet being stolen from Blenheim Palace. It sounds so ridiculous. We would have seen that. Okay, it would have been on Twitter. It would have been on TikTok.

Come on. Yeah, also... Dylan Page would have been talking about that. Yeah, Maurizio who? Is that even an art exhibition making a toilet out of gold? Oh, that's believable

to be fair. This is art. Like, you could sell that for 10 million. We're not even in the right month anymore. We still haven't. We haven't been for

a few weeks now oh boys come on man come on man let's get a guess so the headlines sorry the stories again

slash articles were the woman lives in a sign lives in a sign stolen golden toilet stolen golden toilet or and

what was the last one he's just broke the calendar shit what was the last one the last one was um a last one? He's just broke the calendar. Shit, what was the last one? The last one was the lawsuit. See, I feel like it could be believable.

A guy, a guy, are we trying to find a real loss here? Mate, it's the golden toilet. A guy sued his sidekick for not

Guys, no, this is the thing, right? So, can we all agree that can we all agree that he knows that logic prevails has been our mantra?

And also... But it doesn't prevail. Last week we said it wasn't time-bending mist. That was mental. Guys, think about it. It's a fucking golden toilet that got stolen two months ago at five million quid. It would have made the news.

Let's rule. Do any of us follow the news? Yeah. No, you don't. No, you don the news yeah no you don't no you don't you don't lie it doesn't help us get to the right answer you lied

it would have been this week on England on TikTok or something what what this what right so the one I can rule out

in my head is the lawsuit one I agree because I feel like but is that not why no no it's fake no but an angry American

who went to a tarot card reading and got didn't get told he'd have a lawsuit and then had a lawsuit. That's a common thing he brings up though is like American lawsuits and they always end up fake.

The coffee one, remember? No, no. Can you not bring the coffee one? That was fake. I'm so certain on the golden toilet. Living in a sign for a year. You just yawned.

Yeah, why? Living in a sign for a year and not being caught. 365 days. Who's looking in the sign? Exactly. No one's looking to see if someone's living in a sign for a year and not being caught 365 days who's looking in the sign exactly no one's looking to see if someone's living in the sign

but it's on top of a fucking supermarket yeah you're getting in the night mate she's got to save rent what's she doing for the rest of the day getting money on the street so she's walking down

from the top of the supermarket back up and people go what did you say she had in the sign did she have a lamp I don't remember reading a lamp did I changing your Did she have a lamp? I don't remember reading a lamp. Did I?

Changing your words. She made a fucking floor. She furnished a small space with flooring, a desk, a pantry and even a house plant. A pantry had no electricity involved so it could be true.

How's she building a fucking house on a supermarket? But you could get electricity. You could just get a generator or something. I don't think she's going to get a generator. Would she have... Their generator.

Just presuming that she was homeless or she just decided to do it off the back of her own. I think she's homeless. Yeah, I agree. She started living there. How's she getting all those resources? Through the day, she just like goes scavenging.

And also, you know, supermarket. When the supermarket's shut overnight, she just goes down and gets food. Ah, don't think that's up. She'd be on CCTV. But she can use the skips and get stuff from there, like a lamp and a desk. Where are we going with this? I don't think that's up there. She'd be on CCTV. But she can use the skips and get stuff from there

like a lamp and a desk. Where are we going with this? Because I don't think it's the lawsuit. Golden toilet for me. Right, my brain says golden toilet, but my heart says

it's the lawsuit. Let's go with the brain. Fuck. No, I don't think it. Two on one, I don't think it's the lawsuit. Guys, it's the golden toilet. I don't think it's the lawsuit.

I don't think it's the lawsuit. So it's between the other two. I go with golden toilet. I think it's the sign. I feel like a year is just way too long to not be cool. I'm going Golden Toilet, so it's up to you. You are the deciding vote, mate.

America. Fuck yeah. Golden Toilet. Look at me. It's February, mate. It was two months ago, lad. Straight face, please. Golden Toilet.

He's doing it. Next. No, he's... Sign. He's mocking you. Sign. It's the point for aces. It's Golden Toilet. He's doing it. Next. No, he's... Sign. He's mocking you. Sign. It's the point of faces. It's golden toilet.

Come on. Golden toilet. Sign. It's golden toilet. Golden toilet. So what are you going for? I'm looking in a... Air.

No, it's golden toilet. I swear. Oh, okay. Oh, come on, man. It's hard to say B as well. We need an answer. I don't know! You're the deciding vote. You can't put it all on me. We're a team, okay. Oh, come on, man. It's hard to say B as well. We need an answer. I don't know! You're the deciding vote.

You can't put it all on me. We're a team, man. You've gone for A, lads. That's it. B. What? You're changing. Do you think B?

No. Oh, why? Why do you believe in a golden toilet? No, I just feel like we ignore all logic every week and someone living on the fucking inner side. Oh, what? Someone stealing a fucking golden toilet worth five million quid from Blenheim Palace weapon.

Look, he's laughing at that one. Come on, mate. That would be major world news in the UK. I bet the husband would. We don't watch it. We don't watch the news. You'd see about a fucking golden toilet getting nicked on TikTok.

All right, fine. I've been over... Yeah, he makes a good point. Let's go B. What about this side? You also did just say B. Yeah, let's go B. He makes a good point.

We probably would have seen it. Because we need an answer. I don't need you to agree on one. I've said B is wrong. He's trying to push us towards B. I'm really not. I don't care where you go. It's here.

It's here. It's here. I mean, he's just trying to push me towards B. I promise you it's here. He's trying to get us to lock in. Go here. I promise mean, he's just trying to push me for it, B. I promise you it's here. Logic said. He's trying to get us to lock in. Go here.

I promise you. He's just trying to get me locked in quickly. No, it's gone. He was ready. What are we going for? You were right. You were right.

I promise you. No, he was right. He was right. Here. B. Don't make me the decider now. Don't fucking switch yours, bro. Trust your gut.

Don't let him persuade us. Don't let Theo persuade us. He's lying about watching the news. Your gut is here. My gut is here. So choose here. My gut is here. A. He's lying about watching the news. Your gut is A. My gut is A. So choose A. My gut is A. A!

So are you going with A? A! Oh, no! A! My gut says A. What are you going for? A! Okay.

Locked in? Yeah, A. Okay. I don't agree with this. Oh, no! I don't agree with this. We fucked it, man! If I'm wrong, fair enough.

But I also don't agree even if I am wrong. The Great Golden Toilet is a true story. It was all over the news. Even I remember seeing that. I told you, we were so close there. He was trying to get us locked in. How have we not seen that? No idea.

How have we not seen that? That's hilarious. So obviously we're between the lawsuit and the woman who lived in a sign. I just feel like you wouldn't live in a sign for a year. You'd get caught. I think the lawsuit still might be fake, but still. Oh, shut up. No, I'm joking.

I'm not, because she did live in a sign. It's a true story. Oh, you're joking. The lawsuit's made up. Oh, the one we ruled out first. I told you, it's always a lawsuit with him. It's always an American lawsuit. Or the coffee lawsuit.

It's always a fucking lawsuit. I'm so fucking annoyed. Well, thanks for tuning in, guys. Make sure you like, subscribe, rate us five stars if you're listening. And please leave us all a comment. No, no, no, no. A fact about subscribers. Only 75%...

No. Oh, great fact. 75% of them. A typical Lewis fact. 75% no oh great fact 75% of them a typical Lewis fact 75% of them aren't subscribed so click subscribe 75% of you

aren't clicking it bye guys you should do that at the start of the show not the end yeah I forgot oh no ACAST powers

the world's best podcasts here's the show that we recommend. A VP at HBO said no one would ever watch Yellowstone. Stephen King was rejected by 30 publishers. Charles Schultz was told he'd never make a living scribbling. And Missy Elliott was dropped by her label. The stories of famous names, their lesser-known rejections, and the insights those rejections provide.

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