Back Side - W2S’s Crazy Birthday Celebrations! We Solve A Murder Mystery & The Owl God...

Episode Date: December 5, 2024

Theo and Reev return for a crazy time at W2S's crazy birthday golf day, Tom challenges the lads to solve a murder mystery and Lewis reveals the true story of how the greatest empire in human history fell...If you'd like to work with us, email the studio on [e-mail] by The Fellas Studios: https://fellasstudios.com/podcastsTheo:https://youtube.com/c/HiMalfoyhttps://youtube.com/c/TheoBakerVlogsOllie:https://youtube.com/c/reevhttps://youtube.com/c/OllieFletcherTom Garratt:https://www.youtube.com/@TomGarratt10Lewis:Worm. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to a new episode of Backside with me, Reeve, Theo Baker, Tom Garrett and Lewis Bowden. If you haven't already hit follow, why not tap it right now for new episodes every week. And if you want to see more Backside, catch us on YouTube, TikTok and Instagram, where all you have to do is search Backside. Let's get into it. Well, I used to steal, allegedly, mozzarella dippers and eat them at the bin at McDonald's. You've already told us this.

Allegedly. And then the manager found out we were giving away large fries and he went ape. Why would he care? I know, yeah. Such a jobs worth, isn't he? That's what I said. I've had some nice training spectators lately like that

where they've been like... Because sometimes it's so annoying. Say you miss a train or a train gets cancelled or there might be a train or a train gets cancelled or there might be a train a half hour after and instead of being super off peak

it's just off peak off and like some of the tickets just can be lenient though yeah that's what I mean the last few times

the guy's been like look I shouldn't really let you but I don't really care and I was like thank you I was like yeah you're really going to make me pay like 8 quid did they let you off because you're in first class no I don't go in first And I was like, thank you. I was like, yeah, you really gonna make me pay like eight quid?

Did they let you off because you're in first class? No, don't go first class, I'm going to stand in premium. Oh, you upgrade with 20 quid or something, is it? Yeah, it's like 10 or 15 quid. I went back to Lesley the other day and I overheard someone having to fork out a 96 pound train bill

because they ended up on the wrong train. I was like, oh my God. Yeah, do you know sometimes, he said that the other day, but she said I could either get off or just pay the extra train. I was like, oh my God. Yeah, do you know, sometimes, I did that the other day, but she said, I could either, I could either get off or just pay the extra ticket.

Oh. And I said, I'll pay it, like, because I'm fucking, oh, because you got paid. Why don't you just get off?

I was trained to Newcastle. It was like, it was literally like 80 quid I got on the early one by accident, which was a bit annoying. You should have got off and just walked to the other carriage.

No, I had to wait like 15 minutes or 20 minutes for the next train. Or just wait for the British Transport Police. Oh, fuck. Oh, I see what you mean. Then you 20 minutes for the next train. Or just wait for the British Transport Police. Oh, that fucks up. Oh, I see what you mean.

Then you can hook around back around. Then you can put a fake number down, allegedly. It always just says you can pretty much get every train.

No, it's not. That's not true. Off-peak will be like after half nine. Yeah. I'd argue this is worse chat than high rock. Super off-peak

will be like ten till two. You know, what's this going to be? You know, off-peak train time. Mate, Doggy that's gone in. You know what? What's this going to? You know, is that- Off peak train time. People love this shit, man.

Off peak, it's an interesting fucking conversation. You would be such a jobs worth right now saying this is not good enough content right now. Fuck off. I had an experience on the train earlier. Oh, I don't want to hear it. You're going to make another lie. I swear to God.

I only went to go for a piss, and there was a guy in there, asleep, asleep, taking a shit. Was it Chip? How do you know he was asleep? Yeah, he did do that in Miami. Because he was sat down,

taking a shit with his fucking pants on. But his eyes were closed. Wait, Tom, this must have been like late at night or something. Hang on. An hour ago. An hour ago? Yeah. So he's like this.

Yeah. And then he's going. No, okay, no. He wasn't actively shitting when I walked in. Sure. Then I walked back to my seat, turned around, and there was another guy doing this we actually believed you at the start yeah i had the table he was opposite me

before i was like talking to you i was like you're right man and i come back after seeing that guy and i was like i went to tap him to be like mate you never oh and he was doing it he was had his trousers down his sleeve like that you can always maybe there's just a guy going round and finding people who was asleep and kegging them. Yeah, Lenny Henry again.

Yeah, Lenny Henry. Or maybe it's like, maybe it's like an outbreak, you know, when like, in the zombie films. A zombie outbreak where it's just everyone kegging themselves.

Yeah, yeah, but that's like, that's the symptom. Yeah, the disease is they just pull their trousers down. Do you call it kegging? At school we used to call it pantsed. Yeah, kegging we do.

Pants is fucking... I also say knock down ginger. They're weird down here. Nicky knocking nine doors. Well, I'm a bit sad. That doesn't happen to me. I'm a bit sad that, you know, the other office we have,

where we have the coffee, I'm a bit sad that I haven't got to that. Like, she knows I'm getting a cappuccino. Youse just did another High Rocks. Oh, we're not talking about that. I felt like we have to. They don't want to listen to that. They ran and they pushed some shit for an hour. I don't know. Did we? Did we do a High Rocks, Ree, we're not talking about that. I felt like we have to. They don't want to listen to that. They ran and they ran

and they pushed some shit for an hour. I don't know. Did we? Did we do a High Rocks, Reeve? We did. Again. Just casually. But why did you keep doing them?

Because they're fucking weird. He gave me like two weeks notice and I said, yeah. I was doing it for Black Friday for my pro team because obviously Black Friday is recording this on. Yeah.

What's wrong with that? That's a normal phrase. You're going to narrow down a Friday to one race. What the fuck are you talking about, brother? Well, it's a white phrase. You're going to narrow down a Friday to one race. What the fuck are you talking about, brother? Wait, so white Christmas? Oh. It's going to be a white Christmas for you, am I right?

What's up, man? And they say never eat yellow smoke. Because you're weird, innit? That can't go in. He's excited for Christmas. I love Christmas. So that's it, that's it. You did high rocks.

Yeah, moving on. You started Christmas. No, that's fine. You're just doing the same. You're just running round in circles all the time. Well, we're forgetting, actually. No, we need to address Reeve's antics recently. He's been a wild child.

A naughty boy. So, obviously, he knew we had High Rocks on Friday, right? What did you do on Tuesday, Reeve? Oh, I said yes to drinking. I said, I will quote him. This is the drunkest I've ever been. Only drunk. And nothing else. I suddenly turned into Sean Bean as well. Weren't you there with him? this is the drunkest I've ever been. Only drunk.

And nothing else. I suddenly turned into Sean Bean as well. Weren't you there with him? Yeah, he bottled it, mate. You didn't drink? Yeah, he bottled it. I'm so glad I didn't drink as well. Because he drank three days prior in a row. You know when you just feel like a fat little piggy?

I literally did high rocks the day after. No, no, no. I didn't drink because of high rocks. I drank because I felt like a fat little... I John Jones'd it, mate. Yeah. I just went... No, not that level. I didn't drink because of high-rises. I drank because I felt like a fat little... I John Jones-ed it, mate. Yeah. I just went... No, not that level.

I just... You know when you just drink... I'd eaten so much food as well. I felt just so massive. That's what Christmas is about, though. Oh, no! That's what Christmas is about, though. No, because I didn't realise people don't...

Yeah, as soon as it hits December, mate. People didn't... We went to an all you can eat buffet And it was a 10 out of 10 buffet I'm talking every dish 10 out of 10 Genuinely the most embarrassing Thing I've ever seen

What? Him coming back With a new plate of food Every 5 minutes Where did you go? Oh no You are a fat one During here

But bearing in mind I pushed the boat out I had a really big first plate Oh shut up mate one plate no i know but the first plate i had was i had every meat from the entire buffet so that's across like six or seven cuisines big plate of food then second plate of food i had a couple pizza slices because i couldn't really eat too much five plates people on tiktok when they get cut off at the all you can eat. They're like, why me?

No, but obviously you have to try all the cuisines. You don't have to. No, you don't have to. You've got to make your money's worth, haven't you? How much was it? £75 a head.

Fucking hell. What the hell? No, no, no, no. It was at the Grove. But it was, yeah, it was after a long time. What was this for? Harry's birthday party.

Oh, right, yeah. Oh, yeah. There was a lot of drinks as well. A lot of drinky booze. That wasn't included. The £75 I had was for the food. Yeah, we had the drinks on top of that, didn't we? How was his birthday pie?

What did you do? Walk me through a day of Harry's birthday pie. Who won? Our team, even though you guys just never bought us the prize in the end. Oh, yeah, we didn't do that, did we? Well, the leader's three. Spoiler alert. So two teams of four. It. Oh, yeah, we didn't do that, did we? Well, the latest three is spoiler alert. So two teams of four.

It was myself, Harry, Cal and Calyx versus Theo, Arthur TV, Chris and Randall. The most bullshit teams you've ever seen in your life. They're not fair teams. No, no, no. We played like... You won, yeah, but it was handicapped from that. Yeah, yeah.

Can Arthur TV play? No, mate. Let me tell you about Mr. arthur tv i had the best day of my life because i i understand arthur right and everything he does is just he's mental he's mental right yeah and uh he obviously can't play golf so first i would let him do his thing has he never played never played before we started he said he'd played a few times as a kid, but never since then. Can we emphasize that? And he rocked up in like lost property PE as well.

Literally no golf attire whatsoever. Golf is a prestigious course. Tiger Woods has eagled it there many times. Yeah, it's one of the most elite courses in the UK. And Arthur TV rocks up in second hand PE. No golf balls. No golf balls. No golf balls. No balls.

No clubs, nothing. You have no clubs? He rented them and buy balls. And second shot. Do you know what he's done? He's in the rough and he's teed it up. At the end of the round, he's come away and gone, there's too many shit rules for this sport, man.

But first or second hole, apparently, he's wheeled his trolley over the green and people are going, what the fuck is this? He's at the grove. At the grove. Yeah, yeah, yeah. At the grove.

Home of one of the open championships. Also, on the first hole as well, he's finally like, he's, you know the first hole when he goes, if you play that, it's like a pathway. He's basically close to the green, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's close like, he's, you know the first hole when he goes, if you play that, it's like a pathway. He's basically close

to the green, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's close to the green, but he doesn't know that you're meant to use different clubs. So he, we didn't realise

the first hole, he used his driver every shot. No way. Properly. That's just beyond, I don't care if you haven't played golf.

Properly NPC Tiger Woods PGA 2005. But he just hit it with a driver every time. Oh, yeah. And then every shot you take, he's yapping. Yeah. Every shot, just like...

Randy was losing his mind. Do you know the thing with golf, right? I don't mind when people are talking when I'm about to hit. I actually think I prefer it. Then still sign. I agree, but the etiquette is to... No, I get actually think I prefer it than still signing. I agree, but the etiquette is to... No, I get that.

No, it wasn't just talking though because you can sort of fade that out, but it's more like as you set up and you're back and he just starts talking. Yeah, that's like a new sound and you're thinking about that.

I'm like hearing that now, yeah. Oh, it was funny though. Randy was... It doesn't bother me. Randy was... I'm not shitting you. He was hating it. He rattled Chris a lot, right?

Oh yeah, there was one... Because Arthur, I get it, right? But he was he rattled chris a lot right oh yeah there was one right because arthur i get it right but he was like every hole like he was obviously just not counting right and he was like no that wasn't a 10 it was a nine by the way it's the worst when you play with someone it just it's a 10 man come on let's let's and we were like let's just trust me i'm not trying to be generous off we saw you take six to get out of the tree i'm not trying to cheat you're out of your score we put him down on 10 many holes it was a 16 yeah right and he would argue he would argue that it was a nine i was like you're shooting one four five mate it's not he actually shot what he shot one four seven in the end yeah but uh there was this one hole that i think he got under chris

chris i thought they're gonna fight yeah really they were gonna have a fight there is video footage of there is i've got video footage of the fight what were they doing because i thought arthur was still on the wind up and i realized he was actually not on a wind up he was being deadly serious this was one of the occasions where he was arguing that he did shoot a nine not a ten right because he he he took four attempts at hitting this ball and every single attempt moved the ball he said i didn't hit it just even a stroke is a yeah yeah yeah a stroke counts. Yeah, 100%. But Chris wouldn't... Me and Chris knew he was going to try and say this.

We made sure he watched it. And he didn't realise that. I don't think he realised that we watched everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he was like, no, this is not on. Oh, it was hilarious. So why did they nearly fall? I think it was because Arthur was adamantly didn't hit the ball.

So Chris was getting angry. He was like, just let me off. And Chris was like, you did, we watched it. But to be fair, it's still, it's irrelevant if you hit it or not. That is still a stroke. Oh, you're one of them. Well, no, if you're playing in an actual golf day, if you're playing in a golf day, fucking get the ground.

Bearing in mind, this is a guy that shot a 17 on a par three. But I owned up to that 17. That's what I'm saying. So you're a stickler for the rules. If you hair shot it, that's not a shot. Unless you touch the ball. If you're in a golf day, yeah. If it's just casual playing, I don't care. If you're a stickler for the rules. If you hair shot it, that's not a shot. Unless you touch the ball. If you're in a golf day, yeah,

if it's just casual playing, I don't care. If you don't touch the ball, it's not a shot. Stop being a fuck you. I will say that. Playing with Arthur was incredibly funny

because it wasn't riling me, but it was riling Randall. I'll bet it was though. You're saying it's not, but I'll bet it was. We weren't ever in competition. It was just hilarious. It was absolutely hilarious.

How did Chris almost, like, what was Chris doing in return when Arthur was shouting? You said that. hilarious. How did Chris almost, like, what was Chris doing in return when Arthur was shouting? They were just like being very like, you know, but that's not right.

This is the right way. He was going, I've never seen like, I've never seen like Chris annoyed. No, it was hilarious. But Randy was actually getting annoyed.

Chris was not really annoyed. Randy was actually getting angry because we'd just go to putt and Arthur would just stand and you're like, but he also, it's quite interesting to see You know, Randall was actually getting angry because we'd just go to putt and Arthur would just stand and you're live. But he also, it's quite interesting to see because I've never met anyone who actually doesn't know any rules of golf.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. In fairness, if it's his first ever time, you shouldn't have let him play golf for the first time at the Grove on a competitive golf day. That is stupid. It was funny though, it was funny. That's like someone who's never played football in their life

and going, fancy a kickabout with the lads and it's the World Cup final. The type of people who are members here, very wealthy, the proper golfers. You know what I mean? And they have fucking ARMA TV ahead of them, holding more rolling trolleys across the green. He destroyed that first tee box as well.

A couple of times he just teed off tee box as well. Oh my God. And then a couple of times he just teed off the junior tees and obviously like we were playing off the golds. He was like,

why wouldn't you just tell me before I take the shot? Because now I, no, then we were like it's three off the team mate,

you used the wrong tee. We actually knew what we were doing. That's funny. He's like, why don't you just tell me before I did it? It was were doing. That's funny. He's like, why didn't you just tell me before I did it? It was very enjoyable.

I agree, mate. It's a nice course. Run by me. It was a good day. Enjoyable day. Harry had a great time. You necked a pint at 9am? Two.

Two pints, mate. You're a lad. Wait, we'll stop. Harry, he actually is just an absolute fish for booze. He was necking so many shots around the court even after we'd like so there were certain holes where we're like all right closest to the

pin gets to pick someone else to have a drink and furthest away has to have a drink and he'd just do his shot as he was furthest away and then you go alright he's whipping out another one I'm like mate how are you doing this what shots gin oh we obviously didn't see them

throughout the day really because they were ahead of us yeah we were a crooked so when we met him for like drinks afterwards I was looking at everyone like oh how do you play and I looked at Harry

I was like look you're you're Hammond yeah he was Hammond none of them were Hammonds but it was his birthday

yeah it should be yeah he played really well he played really well I genuinely think drinking and golf or a golf day like that is more fun than like

a pub golf or a pub crawl it's so fucking good pub golf's a great day out as well let's not no no it is but I just think when you're drinking on the course and then like

oh you have like fun games like that well Cal had a few for his birthday last year wasn't it it was like the weather wasn't great on that day, though. That was a problem. But I just think it's so fucking good. Guess who

got a better score between Chip last year around the Grove and Arthur? Josie Fritzl. I think Arthur would have got a better one. Chip was so bad. So Arthur got 1-4-7. Chip... He couldn't hit. ...scored last year 1-4-7. Wow. Wow. That was a good story, man. chip he couldn't hit scored last year 1 4

7 wow wow that was a good story man also guess who we saw on the course Josie Pritzel no not quite

Lenny Emery one time when you guessed Josie Pritzel it'll be right it's been in a scandal as well Lenny Emery who do you think I thought Angzy Harriot

we should get a Lenny Emery picture on the list when we were like on the 12th and they were teeing up the 18th who was it but it was Geoffrey Schlupp and

oh let me guess Geoffrey Schlupp Mateta no no no no Winks no no

Will Hughes Gary Lineker Adam Wharton Dean Ashton no it was Alan Shearer John Arton do you remember

with Geoffrey Schlupp yeah yeah was it just them two no there was two more with them but Cal and everyone said hi they were obviously like quite close

what did you say coin coin coin coin no we didn't we didn't he marks his ball with the coin coin coin Geoffrey Schluck were they alright

well they were just teeing off and we were like alright cool how does Cal know Jermaine Jenas I think from Madison's golf tip

Cal knows everyone man yeah he does business man yeah business is done on the golf course All right, cool. How does Cal know? Do you mind, Genus? I think from Madison's golf tip. Oh, right. Cal knows everyone, man. Yeah, he does, man. Business is done on the golf course. We had a nice evening, though. Good place to network. That was nice, wasn't it? It was fun. Yeah.

You left early, though. I was driving, wasn't I? I didn't leave that early. I left at 9 p.m. And I got there at fucking 8 a.m. So you were drinking all day and then drove home? No, he didn't drink all day.

No, I had the two pints. I did the shots during the round and then sobered up by the... We still need to do like a pitch side golf test. I'm not sure you'd have passed the breathalyzer.

I would have done. I was under the unit. You drank your beers at 9am and by the time it hit 9pm your blood alcohol would be zero. Yeah, probably.

No way. It would. I know how it works. Oh. My girlfriend runs the course. Dr. Dick. We need to do golf there. It's a unit per hour exclusion first hour. Oh, you're runs the course. Dr. Dick. We need to do golf It's a unit per hour

exclusion first hour. Oh, you're boring, mate. You're really boring. Okay. Yeah, we said this ages ago. We said we should do

a pitch side golf day anyway. We just need him to get a little bit better. He'll be better than me. You've seen me. Actually, no,

in the pot of cup in the final day I was really good. Yeah, you haven't played with me when I was good either. I played with you before. Yeah, you played... Round Waterstead. You haven't played with me when I was good either. I need a practice. I just can't use my driver.

I literally can't hit the ball. Do you know what I mean? I've seen... My hometown. You... We were... Yeah, but like, all I'm saying is

you haven't seen me when I'm playing. I've only ever played shit with you. I played with him in Liverpool, didn't I? Maybe you're just shit. Oh, and the... The Wrexham thing. It was Wrexham.

No, it was Liverpoolrexham no it was Liverpool Liverpool the live show that's so random we just played golf that morning why do we have our clubs on us because you arranged it

I think I rented it oh we rearranged it I think I rented it yeah you were pretty shocking that day yeah he was kicking off yeah he was kicking off

with the because the northerners didn't want to let him in I was like you literally just stole our tea time but the thing is if you hear that voice in Liverpool you're not letting him in front of you and that's what you didn't want to let him in. I was like, you literally just stole our tea time. But the thing is, if you hear that voice in Liverpool,

you're not letting him in front of you. And that's what you didn't understand. And when you were complaining more, I was like, I don't think you realise. You know what's funny, how every time he tells a story, it gets more exaggerated.

I didn't say a fucking word. He did. He was, you were complaining. You weren't complaining to them, but you were complaining out loud around them and they would be able to hear that voice. another lie.

You do do that though. It was true. You are like that. You're like the thing is we were the guy with the worst memory calling out yeah yeah have you got a picture of it he would he would do that though like he is very vocal like not even if he didn't say anything it'll be it yeah well in my defense like when someone's in the wrong, they should know they're in the wrong. I don't think they were. I think we were in the wrong.

We weren't in the wrong. We weren't on the tea time with enough time. And it was very busy. It was fine. Oh, talking to someone like that. This is a genuine story. Not that they're not. You know how I know it's already not because he looks to Lewis

more than everybody else. Not that none of them are. No, this isn't even that bad. It's some fucking old bitch today on the train. Is she asleep in the toilet with her pants down? No, she was fully a rolex i like she's a nice watch um fake she was like swift now she had a big pocket yeah i stole it and here it is uh so i was sat i was like kind of in and out of sleep and when i got on the train it was it was empty like absolutely empty so i sat on a table bit and just put my bag next to me on the seat. Anyway, I'm like awoken by this woman tapping me.

And I've got my AirPods in. And she doesn't say anything. She's just tapping my bag. Like really, to be fair, the train was pretty full at that point. So I'm like, I was like, oh, sorry. She indicated to sit next to you. She didn't even like say anything. She just pointed and kind of like...

So as I'm moving it, I move my bag and my coat was underneath it. And she picked it up like that. And I was like, all right. I was like, all right. Fucking hell, I'm moving it. You said that? Yeah, I was like, all right. Fucking hell, I'm moving it.

Yanked it off. I put it down. And then she sat down for the whole journey. Just facing away from me like this. And I was like, you fucking stupid bitch. I think people like that, people like that are on par with- Honestly, it's just so rude.

I was like, most people are like, oh, do you mind if I sit there? And I'd be like, yeah, yeah, no, I wasn't putting my bag down because I didn't want people sitting there. People like that are on par, it's like on the tube where it's like really busy and like the doors just open

and it happened the other day. And this guy's like, get off the train guys so I can get off the train guys so i get off and i shut up give no one give them a fucking chance to me but stop being a why don't you say yeah we had an unbelievably rude encounter of that the other day when we were going back to the other office doors open and and rather than just let people get off this this entire family just walked straight into it. It was one guy. No, it wasn't.

It was like a guy, his wife, and then like their daughter or something. And then they all just walked into us. And then Theo went, okay guys,

yeah, no problem. Yeah, really funny. That's what he does. I didn't say it like that. I was speaking to that one guy. What did you say? You said something similar though. Oh no, I'll be honest.

I would say something similar. No, there was this one guy you said something similar though oh no I'll be honest I would say something no there was this one guy who was so just like oh he's jarring kind of character oh just like jarring no but he was like

very like you know shoreditch and he thought he walked around everywhere I don't know what that means all black he's shoreditch

oh he's shoreditch like posh is that what you're saying no just like edgy oh right just like what are you wearing oh oh he had like posh. Is that what you're saying? No, just like edgy. Oh, right. Just like, oh, what are you wearing? Oh.

Oh, he had like flares on and that. Yeah. And I said something and he was like, oh, oh. Oh, you terrified him? I fucking did, yeah. Yeah. Because he put... He's a bit of a bum.

There was no... He is a fucking bum. There was just no... Also, there was plenty of space to choose to go. Do you think the train's going to go? Yeah, yeah. But also, if you're going to try

and get on immediately, pick the fucking side that's empty rather than walk into the people. He had no spatial awareness. Yeah. So I said... Well, both actually.

So I said, right, okay. That's it. Any chance? Right, fine. We're going to get the girls off on the street. Any chance waiting?

That guy really pissed me off. Yeah, I remember being there and I was like, Right, fine. The space, we're just like... And also, it was that fucking... Do you not check your shoulders? Yeah, yeah. Do you not check your shoulders and open up?

A bit of spatial awareness, you fat fucker. Right. I have got for you today a little bit... What do we call it we got crime side but it's true not it's mystery crimes mysterious crime okay i'm glad that we've ironed out the fucking title for it yeah i don't really know what it's called but basically it's gonna be it's brand new it's good it's it's not a true crime um oh that's murder mystery it's a murder mystery but a real but a riddle,

and you're all going to be the characters, and you've got to figure out who the murderer is. Oh, this is like Cluedo. Yes. Right. You've got to play it. It was Lewis with the rolling pig. So, there was a Japanese ship sailing through the open sea.

Gogo, the sailor, me, was found. Hello, Go-Go, was found. You don't even know your character yet. Shut the fuck up, man. Go-Go, the sailor, was found murdered in the shower. You could be a dead corpse at the bottom of the ocean. Wait, wait, Tom, are we essentially playing murder mystery right now?

Yeah. We're going to get our characters. Yeah. And after some analysis, the captain found three crew members who could have done it. This does say five, but I've narrowed it down to three. Oh, nice. There's three here.

The captain called the three suspected crew members and asked each one of them what he was doing for the last 15 minutes. Oh. Right. Gay cook. Yeah. Tao.

We're getting to character. So you've got to say hello to the... You've got to get into character. Gay cook. Yeah. Well, get into character. So you've got to say hello to the character. Say hello. No. Say hello? What do you mean? Hey. What's his name?

Tao. Tao. Tao. Tao. Tao. In his overcoat said... I was in cold... Oh, no, no, no.

You've got to get into character. I was in cold storage getting... That's just your voice. That's your voice. You did a higher version of your voice. Bear in mind, we've given him five opportunities. There I was in the cold storage getting the meat. Okay.

Right. Next up, we have the one-legged pan engineer with a torch in his hand who said, I was repairing the spare generator engine. Yeah, I like that. You're like a game show. And then finally, the blind seaman said, Seaman?

I was on the mast, correcting the flag, which was upside down by mistake. Brilliant, mate. You nailed it. Well done. The captain then caught the thief who had lied,

who was the murderer. I don't understand. Who's the thief? There was a Japanese ship sailing in the open sea and the sailor was found murdered in the shower. The cook said he was in the cold storage

getting the meat. The engineer said I was repairing a spare generator engine and the seaman said he was on top he was on the mast correcting the flag which was upside down where was the body so based off those clues where's your accent uh whoa whoa whoa where's your accent where's your right you are the killer i am not not. And why is the- Because the Japanese flag upside down is the same as- Correctamundo! You didn't let me defend myself!

You turn the flag the right way round, even though it's always right way round. Don't worry, mate, you'll process it in a bit. I was on top of the ship. How can I be in the shower? But you are the killer, sir. I was on top of the ship, how can I be in the shower? Also, you the killer, sir. I was on top of the ship. How can I be in the shower? Also, you are blind.

That's why it was upside down. Also, you are blind. How would you know that the flag is the wrong way around? That's why it was upside down. I can't see the flag. It's not because I killed someone. No, so why would you turn the flag around if you are blind? Because I could give the job.

He's the captain. He taught me what to do. I'm like, yes, sir. You got to breathe at some point. How can a Japanese flag be upside down, Seaman? Yeah, you idiot. So why is that even relevant? Why is that relevant?

That's the clue of the murder mystery. Let's face it, me and you wouldn't know that. But why does that mean I killed him, you prick? Because you're lying. Because you're a liar. You're lying about your whereabouts. You're a liar. You wouldn't be changing the flag

that was upside down by mistake because the flag can't be upside down by mistake. No, no, no, no. The captain ordered me to turn the flag upside down. So the captain is the liar. The captain is the killer. You killed him. You don't get it.

Yeah, you didn't understand, mate. Where's your fucking accent? Let me show you. One thing. Let me show you, Lou. You can't show me. I'm blind. There's a clue within the riddle

that tells you who the murderer is. But how am I supposed to know that you can't turn a Japanese flag upside down if I'm blind? That is the Japanese flag, right? Yes, but I'm blind. I thought I had to turn it upside down, but I didn't know that it couldn't turn upside down. You need a name for that. Tom's

mystery killer. I think it should be Tom's tots. What does that mean? What does that mean? Tits. I think that's got some good legs to it. Yeah, that was good.

With one new game, we actually have today the return of an old one. You still don't know about this. I believe that this has legs as well. They all take it away. Welcome back to I Had a Dream. Oh, I knew this was coming. You asked him on the stream yeah this is so bad the dream journal's back so there i was what we've got established this is such shit content what we've got established is what have you done in the last seven days because we'll probably work out what you dreamt about we're giving them a

one-time chance you're to tell me about a dream? It's so... No, no, we're giving them one-time chance. It didn't happen. Said dream occurred... I went to sleep and I put Jal Pedro in my SPL. No, that was actually happening in real life. My dream occurred last night.

Oh. Yes. So did you dream about eating pasta? No. You dreamt he was doing a high rocks today? Almost. So there me and Reeve were in my dream. Walking together.

And you said to me, have you got your headband? I went, no, I forgot it. And then you said to me, have you got your like gels? I said, oh, I forgot that. And then we carried on walking and we were stressing out. And then we were stressing out because I was like, I kept forgetting things right so you did dream about High Rocks

no no I waited until the best bit and then I got no bag I was like where's all my stuff I must have forgotten I forgot about it

so I was like I'll go back and get it so I get in the sea and I'm like swimming home I don't know why make it make sense right and I was like

fine yeah and I swim back and I meet you in the water and we're both swimming together. And then we finally get to High Rocks. I go... He mentioned it. And I go, fuck.

I forgot it again. I forgot everything. And you're like, nah. Have you got your banana? And I went, I forgot my banana. And I forgot everything. This is your fault. I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry, everyone. I'm so sorry. You're never doing this again. And I don't know why we're in the water together. That was really weird. You didn your fault. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, everyone. I'm so sorry. You're never doing this again. And I don't know why we're in the water together. That was really weird. You didn't know this didn't happen. Why are we talking about this? And then I woke up, okay?

And then I was so conscious of forgetting things this morning. Why are you entertaining this? I'm not. What? Because I'm looking at it. Yeah, listening. Did you hear what the finale was? No.

He said, I was so conscious I'd forgot everything. I packed two of everything before we went to High Rocks this morning. So you know this morning when I gave Ben a banana? You know this morning when I gave Ben a banana? Yeah. It's because I had a spare one in my bag. Fucking hell, mate. Oh my God, he actually bought it.

And then I had two gels. That's one other one in my bag. That's a good dream. I had a spare jumper and spare trackies in my bag. Great fucking dream. That's amazing mate anyway oh that actually that's actually a really interesting uh segue into my section thanks man because thank you mate it's back this is a genuinely really interesting question and we could dissect this can i have a wee first of course you can you want me sorry but i just want to be able to now but we're in a bit of a flow there because I was going to lead on from what you said.

Go ahead. Are you the same person you went to bed as yesterday? Ooh. And the reason why I ask this is because your cells multiply and decay constantly, right? So even after seven years, on a cellular level, you are completely different to the physically or mentally both here hang on i'm setting up does that not choose prove the

bridge so from that perspective your bodies are completely different after a short while even with just cellular regeneration right but your body isn't the only thing that makes you you right your your experiences your memories your your dreams. Granted, in one minute, won't have much of a change, but over a period of time, let's say, even this conversation,

for example, we are different from when we started. I would agree with that. Yes. In the body is the ship of Theseus. I'm not breaking it down, but it's different to the ship. No. Yeah.

But I mean, there's the argument that you always retain some sort of information that you had a little while ago. But the ship always travelled. No, it didn't. As the ship. Stationary. This isn't a shipothesis argument.

The cellular regeneration thing, that's just like a breakdown to say that we are genuinely different at cellular level. But the person you went to bed yesterday is that who you are now I'd say no why because when me just me

I I usually get to bed listening to something anyway that's so mental I do as well so I'll leave

a podcast on or no it's usually fucking old XFM fucking compilation do you know

people listen to this going to sleep that's mental I was talking to Alex at that's mental I was talking to Alex at the wake up I was talking to Alex at the gala

get the fuck up there's four of them downstairs he was sitting there he puts backside on his sleeve who's Alex you met no Alex

so I would say things I would take in subconsciously from that whether it's something funny or just something to spark my thought process, and as well as the Friday night, I might be really sleepy and tired and moody. Then I might wake up in a better mood.

So I'm in a different mental state as well. I would definitely say you're a different person. Let's go one further. How long into the past are you a different person from when you were? I'm a different person to like two months ago. No, but I'm saying even five minutes ago, us talking about this, we'd have a different train of thought. I'd say post-Australia Theo to pre-Australia Theo

is genuinely a different human being. I don't know why you keep saying this. I'd say month to month. You were very stressed. I definitely have different ways of thinking. You tell when you go back to normal. I like how we're having a genuine one in there. He made a point and he started over-talking him, actually.

He came back from Australia happy. The pre-Australia Theo was grumpy. He was getting the ride every day in the sun. Yeah, man. What do you mean? How could you tell I was stressed beforehand? It was something that would naturally... I feel like when you get stressed

it's not like ah it's like someone's gradually getting more and more so you're not really noticing it day by day but then say you have a big refresh and you go back to where you were all this time you can notice that jump rather than the gradual down i see sign he's giving up now no now he's back to happy again i was losing the world to live before australia i can't lie but it's like say say well you call me hit Hitler damn you Australia so that's probably saved me decline and then I'll have a holiday probably over Christmas

and then I'll come back to actually like because it's getting all dark and gloomy now but as I went to the sunshine I got a nice load of vitamin D yeah

I'll bet you did a little bit of a dick in regards to your question yeah how many sleeps no but not not even like do you know what I mean

because like one sleep one sleep may mean you're the same person but many sleeps may mean you're the same person no but would not even like do you know what I mean because like one sleep one sleep may mean you're the same person but many sleeps may mean you're the same person no but would you say here's a question then obviously I don't

want to keep bringing it back to it but would you say you're the same person now as you were before High Rocks this morning no

exactly yeah you are and isn't it also relative no but that was hard work he's grown as a person yeah yeah yeah

I listened to a podcast two days ago and it changed my thought process. There you go. That's what I mean. But it's also relative. If you hadn't listened to that podcast,

maybe you won't change your thought process for another couple of days. So then it would be four or five days. Because it awfully sounds like to me that you're sort of low-key

talking about the butterfly effect. Oh, shit. It's like the butterfly effect it sounds exactly like it just means that humans are dynamic as a species I feel like you're always

just but you never permanently you like say this hierarchy you might have a period of like motivation whatever now but then you might resort

back to wherever your natural self is it's not instantly permanent so he will always revert back to being that yeah but you're implying that every change should always be positive but that's not it's not instantly permanent so he will always revert back to being yeah yeah but you're implying that every change should always be positive but that's not true either yeah you could be a different person and be more negative afterwards yeah yep than see that's so you're

never the same person yeah how far back into the past do you want to be a different person two years ago i was definitely like a lot more of a positive person. Are you saying working here has grinded you down? I did not say that. I'm saying... We've grinded you down then. The struggles of adult life. London's grinded you down. Yeah, London.

But it's an interesting question. It can also be that say something happens to you, like, I don't know. You die. No, let's say, let's say like when I was on the ticket inspectors earlier, let's say all of them did make me pay them that. Then I'd build up a resentment towards them and then I'd treat them

differently in future things like that so there's just there's a it's a pretty deep question when you think about it but at the end of the day you're a fucking idiot

oh we didn't have deep side lights on we don't need what are you oh yeah this is in your bed you could have whacked them on because I thought

that was a pretty good question we're in the fucking garage mate it's not really what do you mean my bed is that where you sleep? Just because your chair is shit. I could sleep like that. Could you?

Yeah. Yo, yo, yo, Lewis has a fact. Yo, yo. Lewis has a fact. Lewis has a fact. Lewis has a fact. And the fact is, the fact of the matter of the fact

is a motherfucking chimp. Okay. One more fact. Are you ready? An elephant's trunk weighs more than a double-decker bus. That's just not true, though, is it? That cannot be real.

That's obviously- It's like, it's because of the density. Lewis, you're wrong. I'm not wrong. I swear to God, because it's dense. An elephant doesn't weigh more than a double-decker bus. No, an elephant's trunk. But anyways-

That's part of the elephant, Lewis. Anyways, that's- If an elephant got on a scale, that includes the trunk. Why are you still on your phones? You're not even- I'm Googling it. I'm cross-referencing the weight of an elephant with the weight of a double-decker bus. It's elephant's trunk. No, but Lewis...

Elephant trunk alone. It does. It's just a little wobble fact, though. Are you sure you're not referring to, like, per centimetre square? No, no. Okay, so explain this, Lewis. Wait, wait, wait. No, no, no, no, no. So, a double-decker bus weighs 26.5 thousand kilograms.

A adult male elephant weighs up to 6,000. Is that with people on the bus though? No. Lewis, an empty bus. The trunk when it soaks up water and it soaks up so much weight, it's heavier than a double-decker bus.

12,000 kilograms, but it's still double. So you're implying that an elephant's trunk up like an elephant's trunk holds like 19 000 liters just really dense and it was just a what the fuck no you know why you're making up shit now that's not that's me this is a fuck the scene we've just proved your that sentence in itself is fucking abomination it must be true anyways um let me tell you about the aztec empire brilliant I don't want to know. This is so good.

Were they ever at war with the Moon Egyptians or not? Let me guess. The fucking aliens. That's why they got exiled. Finger people and then they started ruling the world. So the Aztecs, anyone know who the Aztecs were? Yeah, they were abandoned in the 70s. No.

They're in South America. Yeah, they were abandoned in the 70s. No. They're in South America. Yeah, they basically ruled the world. They actually just banned one of their ancient civilizations. They didn't rule the world. They're pussies. No, they were badass-like. So basically, since the dawn of time to the 1500s, Aztecs were the boss-ass bitches.

Is that what... 1500s all the way up until that point? It definitely wasn't up to the 1500s. You talk some shit. That seems like it's too long. 1500s. An ancient civilization all the way up to that point. It definitely wasn't up to the 1500s. You talk some shit. That seems like it's too long. 1500s. An ancient civilization all the way up to the 15th. And I'm going to tell you how they got wiped out.

That was 600 years ago. I'm going to tell you how they got wiped out. It wasn't the 1500s. That's 600 years ago. That's the time I cannot be bothered. That's like Henry VIII shit. You're an idiot. It's 1500.

You do know you're an idiot. I am so excited for you to get rinsed over this because it was. No, man. Maybe you're right. 1536. It's when the final Aztec died.36 is when the final Aztec died when the final Aztec died

well there was a war for 1500 years so Aztecs were basically bossing it until the 1500s can we call them an ancient

civilization then if they lasted that long or not I don't know yeah like ancient civilizations like 5-10,000 years ago

why is Machu Picchu so like destroyed then because of all the cum it's erosion from rainforest from cum

erosion look at the pyramids yeah it's erosion from cum there's a big rain there though sandstorms Lenny Henry went

there there's lots of civilizations in the rainforest they can see from like scanning from above yeah we know

the Spanish wiped them out yeah the Armada yeah with the flu them out. Yeah, the Armada. Yeah, with the flu, wasn't it? Anyways, well, talking about the Spanish. Armada.

Armada listening to this. Anyways, they were really good. They worshipped an owl god and they were really skillful. What's the owl god's name? Owl god. No, I'm asking.

OVO? I don't know. Owl god. All right, fair enough. What from Lava? They were really skillful artists. OVO, Drake, Octo. It's an owl. Who's the guy from Lava? He's called OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. OVO. Ove, Ove, Drake, Socto. It's an owl.

Who's the guy from Lava? He's called Ove. Ove. Ove Wonka Novi. Right. Anyways, the Spanish started knocking about in the 1500s and they wanted to take out the Aztecs. They were like,

What for? The Spanish were on one at this point. Yeah, they were dirty paella fuckers, they was. I don't think paella existed then, did it? Yeah. Maybe. So the Spanish leader

was called Hernan Cortes and he wanted to... He used to play for Inter? He wanted to conquer the Aztecs as well as the football pitch. What? He gathered armies and heads,

not armies and heads, he... What the... He gathered his army and headed to the capital called... How can you get that mixed up? Tino Chitilan.

Chitilan. Oh, Chichen Itza? Yeah, he's the Georgian left back. No, not what you just said. So he heads to... He's a place in Mexico though, Lou. It's one of the great wonders. So...

No, you're on about... Chichen Itza? Yeah. The big... Chicken schnitzel. No, not chicken schnitzel. Chicharito. No, that's a...

What has this become? It's in Mexico. It's the big Aztec Shouldn't do bullshit facts About what you're talking about. I'm talking about me. I'm a capital city that no longer exists Atlantis. No, where? Anyways anyways, so the Spanish headed there they're like gonna fucking smash these in we're fucking badass but did they know the reason the Aztecs

were bossing it about for so long is this owl god was their like secret weapon oh fucking hell here we go so the Aztecs

had the owl god on their side and it was sort of like a weapon they never liked to use they didn't want to summon him all the time but people feared

this owl god so they would never really try it. Try it on with the owl's text. It sort of became a myth and a legend. If you start seeing a couple owls, you get a bit suspicious. Wait, hang on a sec. It's the owl god.

Oh my god. Not owl god. No, owl god. What would owl god be? He said owl for the whole time. What was the name? Owl god. It's not fucking owl Pacino, is it?

It's the owl god. Owl god. Owl god it's not fucking Owl Pacino is it it's the Owl God Owl God the God of Owls Alan Shearer the God of Owls is the one that saved them no it's a God that is an Owl

yeah not the God of Owls it's a fucking Owl Owl God right now so what I'm all about to tell you I promise you

this is all real it's not though it's so fucking good yeah but if you start giggling when you read the Owl I'm giggling because it is just a funny story. But look, the first fact you told us wasn't even true.

So that was a wonderful fact. And gods, in my opinion, don't exist. So I don't think this is true. It's Hedwig. It's fucking Hedwig. Back then, they believed gods to be real. So they would fear the owl god. Just because they believe it's real doesn't mean this is real.

I've never said that. What have I said that's unbelievable so far? You said the owl. I've said the, they worship the owl god. People feared the owl god. The Spanish wanted to take them over. All of that is fine. You said the owl bummed all the Spanish armada.

Well, I'm getting on to that. Prove armada. So anyways, the Spanish, they were like, fuck this owl god. We're not scared of this shit. We want to fuck him. And they go over and they lay siege to the capital. They lay siege? Lay siege.

And they're starting to smash things down. And the Aztecs were losing and they're starting to like smash things down and the aztecs were like losing and they're like in a bit of trouble i was in anyways the aztec the aztec king was here and he was like fucking hell we're in trouble here we've lasted four and a half thousand years and now we're getting beaten up by some pile and it's and it's they were they're on the brink of losing they're on the brink of losing. They're on the brink of losing. And like the chief commander comes over to him and he's like, boss, we do have that one thing.

And he's like, the owl god. And he's like, yeah. And he slowly does a 180 degree turn as he comes back out. And he's like, we could summon the owl god.

You farted? No. Oh. We could summon him. And he's like, the problem is the owl god was so strong, no oh we could summon him and he's like the problem is the owl god was so strong like he would not only kill all the spanish he would kill all he would kill all they believed him to kill is this like a giant owl so the person they worship is just a relentless murder and it doesn't actually matter whether or not so they say attack them yeah kill all the spanish i need to kill all the aztecs is it now is it human or is it like half

out half human i don't know they just believe this was like it was like their new you're an idiot it was basically it was like their nuke that's what they believe yeah how do you how do you leave that so he basically had the decision where he's like right do we give up the city or do we just

kill us all with the owl god this is a real decision you're fucking unbelievably stupid no this is a real this is a real decision I'm not saying

I believe in the owl god get to the bit of the alien anyway so he's like he's there and he's like fucking hell he turns to his

chief commander Corporal Willy Willy yeah yeah's there and he's like fucking hell. He turns to his chief commander, Corporal Willy Wally. Yeah, yeah, yeah, class. And he just goes... Oh God. Nods his head. Oh right, that doesn't even... And like Corporal Willy Wally looks at him and he's like... Why have we brought up Corporal Willy Wally?

He's the chief commander. I don't know his name, so he's Corporal Willy Wally. I'm imagining the chimps there back there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like, he takes... He's a chimps there and he's like he's a bit fucking nervous it's like you're basically smashing

the fire button aren't you it's like fucking hell once the owl god's free he's there once the owl god's been summoned

there's no putting him back in his bottle he's killing everyone so he goes away and summons the owl god and I swear to god all this is

true you keep you keep prefacing that but it's a fact so you shouldn't have to tell us this is true this is all true so he walks away and he's like the king's waiting for the owl god to be somebody he's like saying goodbye to his kids like kissing on the forehead he's like it's gonna be all over now because he doesn't want to give up the seat to the spanish um so but it turns out The owl god What they did to summon him Is essentially just dressed a soldier

Up in an owl And they like put him on loads of drugs And sent him out into the war What does that mean? What does that mean? Their homage to the god Is like Get some random nutcase high,

stick him in some feathery costume. I swear to God, this is how these, he's got loads of drugs, dressed up as an owl. And they're like, go on. And this actual Spanish reports,

there was genuine Spanish reports. This is completely real. Of a guy who's dressed with feathers on, on top of a roof, like making all these noises, off his face, firing darts at everyone. And they just killed him straight away. They killed him?

He lasted like two minutes. So what happens in the... Where's the god? Where's the owl god? Just die. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. He is not our god.

He's crying. I swear to god. I swear to god. So this guy would have just been dressed up and given a bunch of... Because obviously there is no, no. He is not an Algon. He's crying. I swear to God. I swear to God. Wait, so this guy would have just been dressed up and given a bunch of ayahuasca. Because obviously there is no Algon and he isn't actually the super weapon. So the Aztec king would have seen this mad bastard

on the roof going, and just die straight away. One fucking arrow through his heart. Oh, it's so funny. And he just lost. So that's how they got a snake, right? That's the real, and that's how the Aztecs fell. And they just lost. That's how they got extinct, right? That's the real, and that's how the Aztecs fell.

Yeah, fair enough. They thought they had the- Their myth of being like- Yeah, the Owl God. Undefeatable was like, we are fucked up so badly here. The Owl God isn't real. What are we going to do?

Is it Bob Beathers or the- Has anyone got a last minute plan? Because there is not an omnipotent Al God to save us at this point Lads Who's fucking going to do anything? Kevin You'll do

There's genuine reports that are documented 1500 from the Spanish From the Spanish And I know this is all real Where there's a reporter with a car Dressed as an owl shooting darts at fucking people on the roof and they just killed him.

So imagine the king, the king's like, here he is, the owl god. He enters and he's just like, yeah, now we got him. Dead. Yeah, yeah. That wasn't the real one. Send out the real one. Shit, we didn't have an owl god this whole time.

Oh, I couldn't believe it. Are you fucking serious? We've- This whole time. It's going to, he's going to Willy Wally. He's like, this whole time he said we have this super weapon. I don't know, he's still talking about it. He said we have this super weapon, Willy Wally.

Where's the owl god? He's the local homeless man outside the tavern. I expected some sort of Godzilla to walk as a bloke on LSD. And that's how they fell. That's how the Aztecs fell. Genuinely. I know you don't believe this. I promise you, that's how the Aztecs fell.

It's amazing. That is genuinely true. That is the most ridiculous end of a civilization I've ever heard of. The olden days were so funny, man. It's so funny. Called their bluff and just fucking ended an entire pre-existing ancient empire. It must have been theirs. He's actually not wrong about him falling in 1521.

Mate, I promise you, that is all real. But it's actually due to the plague. Well, no, he said 1536. The Spanish had superior weaponry to the Aztecs. Yeah, they smashed them in. Well, yeah, because they sent out a fucking... They introduced new livestock to disrupt their food chain. And there was a deadly disease epidemic that weakened the Aztecs before they arrived.

Yeah, they were outmatched in the battle. It was bird flu, wasn't it? But they thought they had the owl gun. Do you imagine the other guy, they're like, right, come on, someone's getting you in it. He's like, I'm the back wall. No bird flu, innit? But they thought they had the owl gun. Do you imagine the other guy, they're like, come on, someone getting you in it. He's like, I'm the owl gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He must have believed it was like,

this is gonna give you powers mate, just fucking off his tits. That's one of your better ones that I enjoyed that. Firing dots at no one. But you have like a proper war feel. Tom did not find that funny, did you? No. No, you have to picture the proper war. Yeah Did you? No. You have to pick to the proper war.

And there's boards everywhere. I'll just print this out as a dressed as an owl. Kicking him out the door. Come on, save us, lad. There's a Spanish, just kill him straight away. Go on then, Tom. Bring us in. Bring us out.

Fucking. I enjoyed the owl, bro. I love him, man. You should just Google how each empire fell. And make something up about it. Yeah. I was actually so famous. I couldn't believe that's how they fell. It's not, man. You should just Google how each empire fell. I just... Yeah, that's really good. I couldn't believe that's how they fell. It's not, but...

What do you mean? It's not how they fell. That story might have happened, but that's not the reason they fell. Imagine just thinking you had this, like, superpower, like, that you just haven't called out. They believed that for a good thousand years. Yeah, it might have been passed down forever.

Before it's ever been questioned. And then finally... someone finally called them. The Spanish are finally like, they're talking shit, by the way. And they're like, I will show them. Shit, that's all we've got. I'm fucking mad.

The king, the king must have been there. Have we got any other weapons? No. That's all we had. Fuck. The king must have been there, like, fair play. I don't know king must have been there Like fair play

I don't know how we made it as far Fucking hell Steve It's not the old God It was fucking good that way That is really funny That's one of your better ones Thank you

Whoever sent that in to me Someone sent that to me Feel free to send in more facts Oh god Fucking good Nearly pissed myself And that was class I love the art.

I thought you might like that. Anyway, today's quiz is a history quiz. You're starting on minus 20. You should win this. You love... It's got Aztecs and Owl Gods in it.

I'm fine. I'm golden. Imagine first question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What battle? Right. Question number one of Buzzer Noises. It was battle. Right. Question number one. Oh, buzzer noises.

Owl God. Two are as tech. Nice. Very good. In what year was Concorde's first flight? Tech. 1973. Okay.

Owl God. Oh, we're doing closest then? Yeah. All right, sure. It was like 1992. Oh, wait, yeah, 73. I thought it would have been... I'll go 84, 1984.

It's a point of fear. 1969. Wow. It's earlier than you think. It's because they retired in what? Late 90s? Minus 19. The year...

No, yeah, you're back on zero now. You do start with minus one for being late. It's not in the 2000. It's because they retired in what? Late 90s? Minus 19. The year... No, yeah, you're back on zero now. You do start with minus one for being late. It's not in the 2000s. I swear they... I think they flew it early 2000s. It was... It ended in the early 2000s because of the crashes, wasn't it?

Yeah. Question number two. What language was spoken in ancient Rome? Tech. Latin. Correct. Oh, shit. 1-0 for you. I was going to say Italian. Rome Tech Latin Correct Shit 1-0 for you I was going to say Italian

I thought it was a trick question Well the precursor for it What? You just went Before Italian it would have been Question number three Who discovered penicillin? Oh god

As As Or Fucking Or I know his name. Five. No, please don't count.

Please let me think. Please let me think. Please let me think. Please let me think. Fleming. Fleming. Yeah, you fucking I don't know if you can allow that.

Yeah, of course you can't. Which one? Which Fleming? Come on. Because one wrote James Bond and the other one discovered penicillin. I think we know

which one I'm on about. Go on then. The Fleming that discovered penicillin. I'm going to give him it. I'm going to give him it. That was good from me. Right. You know, one I'm on about. Go on then. The Fleming that discovered... I'm going to give him it. I'm going to give him it. That was good from me. Right. You know, I discovered it as well.

Yeah, he left his bread out. Well, yeah, mould, wasn't it? Right. Which US state was an independent country from 1777... Oh, God. Washington. Oh. Fuck, what?

They're not all ordered, so it's a bit fucking hard to get the answer. Tech. Right, right. Incorrect. It's one of two. I'm going to go. He didn't even finish the question. Alaska.

Incorrect. What's the rest of the question, please? It was, which US state was an independent country from 1777 to 1791? Only like 20 years really. Just under. That's where you...

No, it's not. It can't because it's more later than that. It's high. As New York Tech

it's not a state yeah it is New York's a state Tech it's both Hawaii there's New York City and New York State

yeah Hawaii no oh god it's obviously Texas I don't know if you lot

will even know this state oh brilliant after the three I'll give you a clue I won't know if you lot will even know this state. Oh, brilliant. After three, I'll give you a clue. Oh, what? No. I'll tell you what it begins with. As... Well, it's obviously not Florida,

but I guessed that because it's waterbed. No, right. It begins with V. Vancouver. Oh, God, Vancouver. That's in Canada. That's in Canada, mate. V. I don't know any states. I'm pretty sure it features in...

Oh, Tech. Vermont. Yes. Well done. I was going to say, I think it features in Dumb and Dumber. Oh, you're losing. That's Alaska, isn't it?

I am, actually, yeah. I think that's Vermont. Unless he's still on minus 18. No, he said he's... No. You're on two now. You're on one. Next question.

In what year did the Berlin Wall fall? Tech. 1999. Correct. Of course, you know that, don't you? Some clutch shit right there. I can't even fist bump that now. That just ruined my mood.

Pardon? Martin Luther King was assassinated in which US state? Oh, God. Mississippi. Tech. No. New York. No.

You've got something on your head. You love America. Do I? All your questions are American. Shock. Two are American. This is what's on the quiz I haven't done this

that's not your job it's a quiz I found online Tennessee yes was it yeah actually yeah

no fucking way two to one shit I'll do two more give me a chance who was the last Tsar of Russia? Oh, God. I don't even know what a fucking Tsar is.

This is hard to be fair. Abramovich. No. What the fuck? I'm just trying to say a Russian name. No. Rasputin. No.

Tech. Franz Ferdinand. No one's going to know this. It was Nicholas II. No one's going to know this. This is a stupid... It was Nicholas II. No one's going to know. I was actually going to say that. In which French city was Joan of Arc burnt at the stake? Algod.

Tech. There's no way you know this. You're just buzzing in early. Nice. No. Of course. Toulouse. No.

This is your crease, Toulouse. City. I've never heard of it, I can't lie. Are we going to get it then? I don't know. I thought if you know the answer... Marseille. No, I'm going to...

No, no, no. Say the beginning letter begins with R two tech rule one yeah it is I was gonna say that

I knew it was R I thought you'd know that so that's three two one I was hoping you'd said R by the way one more question

and it's double points nice which oh yeah I don't even know that points. Nice. Which I don't even know that. Oh I'm safe.

Right. In what year did the French Revolution start? Oh God. He got the first.

Oh you didn't finish it actually. He was first. Well Theo's out anyway because he No but

he was first. 1793. Ooh. 1782. You say start or finish? Start. Start. 1781.

You're all very close. Dick move from him it's no it's logical it's 1789 oh so 3 and 1 that's what I want so loose dancing fuck no I cleaned up you know

you were very good on that quiz well done that was a lot of French history that Theo knew as well. Well, he's got a house in the south of France. He's got skiing and all. Oh, skiing.

Or the Famalera. We're going to the south of France. I've explored a lot of France. I know a lot of my French history. Yeah, anyway, thanks for watching, Oz. Please subscribe. Look out for Lewis's dance.

Yeah, how many more subs until we hit 50? I don't think it's on your watch. 5,000. We are 5,000 away. Obviously, what else is Room 1 famous for? Cheese. No, the dragons that come out of the building.

They have these huge dragons that pop out. Is he just flexing on us after the show's ended? Dragons aren't real. Well, not well. Anyway, fuck off. They aren't real. Yeah, bye. You made it to the end.

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