Bad Dates with Jameela Jamil - Grindr Lies (w/ Bob the Drag Queen, Meatball & Rheeqrheeq Chainey)

Episode Date: September 28, 2026

Joel Kim Booster assembles three of the world's most famous liars — Bob the Drag Queen, Meatball, and Rheeqrheeq Chainey — to settle what's fair game to fib about in sex and dating. Then Bob hands over her phone, and the panel puts her Grindr profile on trial: photo by photo, verdict by verdict — is Bob catfishing America? Plus: the smoothest bad-date escapes), the official wiggle room for height and weight, and why Bob only filters for 6'6" and up.Subscribe to SmartLess Media on YouTube for full episodes, and follow @intimacycoordinatorshow on Instagram and TikTok for clips.Joel Kim Booster: @ihatejoelkim · Loot Season 3 (Apple TV+) · Fire Island (Hulu) · Psychosexual (Netflix)Bob the Drag Queen: Now Clap! Tour on sale nowMeatball: Sloppy Seconds with Big Dipper & Meatball · Fat Slut, every third Friday at Precinct DTLARheeqrheeq Chainey: The Sex Lives of College Girls (HBO Max)Produced by Brian Baldinger and Anne Harris. Associate Producers are Maddie McCann and Katherine Calligori. Editor is Jacob Vaus. Executive Producers are Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, Robert Cohen, Richard Korson and Bernie Kaminski. Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Intimacy Coordinator ad-free. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Welcome to another episode of Intimacy Coordinator. I'm your host, Joel Kim Booster, and boy, oh boy, do we have a barn burner for you today. Today's episode is loosely about lying. What is okay to lie about in the context of sex dating and hooking up? Are there stats that are okay to fudge? Are there things that you should never lie about? We have it all in this episode. We even check out one of our guests' grinder photos to see if he's catfishing a

America. Spoiler alert, he is. First off, Rupal's Drag Race Season 8 winner. Oh, really? HBOs were here. Trader's Season 3, host of sibling rivalry with Monet Exchange, and only child with Bob the drag queen. It's Bob the Drag Queen. It's Bob the Drag Queen. Thank you. And joining us in Drag, wow, thank you.

What an idea? What an idea? A drag queen and drag. Well, you know, there's always all these comments about queens showing up out of drag. I know. I just thought maybe I would try something. Fucking Ruthless. I did have to get ready in my car on the way here.

Which is crazy. If I was at your level, I would also be showing up in drag. Okay. But you're here with me, though. Boole brothers. So what level are you at? You're here. I'm not with me and I'm in the same room, Bob.

I came to the lobby. I see the psycho killer clown. Can I get an intro before you start talking shit about me Bob? Literally, we haven't even introduced the entire panel. I've already lost control. It's going to be crazy. The beautiful drag queen across from me today is you might have seen her on the Boulay Brothers Dragulae.

Season 1, co-host of the Sloppy Seconds podcast. an unbearable podcast. It's Meatball, everyone. The one, the only, the legend. Thank you so much. Receiver of the only nice wig I have ever been gifted in my entire life. You've been in some tough ones.

You've been in some tough shape. Locked down, I said, who wants to come over and get this wig? And Meeples said... And I showed up, and I snuck up to your front door, and then out of nowhere, you just popped up in the window and you were like, take it.

Take the wig. Take the wig. Take the Wigs and Grace. It was beautiful. What did you get rid of it? Because I don't do... It was too nice to do the shitty out of it. It was nice.

It was sent to me. It was sent to me. But then you end up in these non-shook, non-gone wigs and look at crazy. But that's where I should. That's where I belong. The woman calling me crazy to my right. Don't call a woman crazy. Writer and producer of sex lives of college girls killing it.

Emmy Award winner for the Babysitters Club. A dear, dear friend of mine, Rie Cheney, everybody. Hi, guys. I just noticed that you called out her word, but you didn't mention any of your mind. Which ones? My peabody? Oh, right.

Your peabody. I'm not in the water sports, but I got a peabody. It's not peat. Like, I'm so sorry. So, until. If it was peegot, I'm only, I'm only four letters of four.

You're only four word. There's a comfort and only being three away. Well, you're more away from a peigot. Oh. Oh, okay. I have nothing. And I have nothing by Whitney Houston. Yeah, babe.

You guys, today's episode is loosely, and it's going to be a loose theme because I can tell you right now I'm not going to be able to steer it into this direction. But we're talking, we're doing lying today. We're talking lies. I've got three of the world's most famous liars sitting around me today. Oh, did you not know? Did you not know that's why we've got a theme. but I didn't know I was one of the three most famous liars. I got the email. I'm a fable teller.

This brings me. This brings me to the icebreaker for today. Bob, such a great liar for three episodes on The Trader, season three. I was there for four episodes. I dare you. On the season.

So everybody, what's the smoothest lie you ever told to get out of an awkward dating situation? Smoothest. So I was talking about this today with my friends. I was trying to figure out because I don't really tell lies is in fact I tell truth to the point

where it's uncomfortable. Like I will tell a truth that it will be very, very uncomfortable with everyone around me. Because if I don't want to be there, I'll just say, I'm going to go. I'm going to be like, I don't want to be here. I'm like, all right, guys, I'm going to go ahead and leave.

Yeah. I will get. You announce it? Yeah. You need that attention? I'm not going to Irish goodbye. I'm not going to Irish goodbye. So you have never, you have never in a hookup situation.

They've arrived. You're not into it. You do not, you've never, you will straight up be like, this is not. I'll say no thank you. You will. Yeah, I'll say no thank you.

Or you'll get in a huge fight with it. Say again? Or you'll get in a huge fight with him. I've argued with one hookup one time. Well, let's hear about it. But we didn't even get the hook up though. I was in, I want to say like, Holland or so.

I can't remember where I was. Oh. And this guy came to my room and on Grindr, it was already kind of contentious. Because I think my profile said something like, I'm probably who you think I am. Hmm. actually obsessed

And he was like, who are you? And I was like, if you don't know, it's honestly not a big deal. Yeah. If you don't know what that big deal. I prefer it. But if you know who I am, I probably am who you think I am.

Yes. And then he was like, well, I don't know who you are. I said, that's okay. Then I went to his profile and he was following Alaska, Monetic James, Sasha Valor. Thinking of liars. My boyfriend, Jacob Ritz. Wow.

I was like, you're following my boyfriend. And you know he rushed to Instagram to unfollow you. Oh, sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he went in unfollowed me. And then, so then he got in my room and then he was like, you think I'm, you're better than me. And I was like, I do, I just, all I said was, all I said was, I am probably who you think I am. Yeah.

And then the conversation became that. And then I also ended up having two hotel rooms by accident. I'm in Holland. I've got two hotel rooms. I'm famous on grinders. Don't try to be relatable. Something happened with the tour. I was on tour.

And something happened with my hotel room and I ended up with two rooms. I just remember being like Abundance. Manifestration. Like it was like Serena Chacha can't even get one room. Can't even go. Here I am with two.

So I ended up going to my I ended up leaving him in there. I was like you know what? I'm going to leave you here. What? Not lodging in Holland. Because I have somewhere to go. But all your shit was in that room.

No. That was the that was the that was the greeting room. That's like when I get a hotel with two full-sized beds. One is the eating bed and one is the sleeping bed. Oh, for sure. I think I can say the fucking bed.

Yeah. Well, the eating bed though. Keep all the crumbs in the same one. To quote Jay-Z, I got a lot where the rhymes are written. You know what I mean? You just left him in the room and that's it? Well, we argued, I liked to argue, so we argued for almost an hour, if not more. And then after we were done arguing, I just said, you got to go.

And he kept wanting to communicate about what we were arguing about. And I had had my fill. So I just said, you know what? I'm going to go. How does that argument last for an hour? It's very simple. You either know who I am or you don't or you're lying about knowing who I am, done.

Well, I called him out about knowing who I was. And then he was like, well, I think I might have heard of you. And I was like, there comes a point where it's like, no shade. If you know Jacob Ritz, my boyfriend, who is a photographer in L.A., you know who I am. A presence, an occasional presence on your podcast is, you know, like. In terms of public facing, that's about it. That's like someone's following Monet but not me.

Even if you know who I am. If you know who Monet is, you know, and there's a chance. Monet has been on season of Drag Race that I was not on. So if you were someone who literally just watches Drag Race, and you do not follow the girls after, you only watch All-Stars. Only watch All-Stars, which is a type of person. Then, sure, there's a world where you might know Monet and not know me. If you came on Drag Race, like, season nine.

There's a world where they think Monet is you. Yeah, that's awesome. That's the world we live in. That's a different way. an ass structure though. Are all your friends black? My friends?

Because everyone here's black. Everyone in this room is black. Except you. Well, I guess... Even the sound guy is black. He's the videographer. Oh, damn. The videotech is black.

Show some respect. And he is... No, I guess we need to change the theme of the episode. There's one white person hiding in the corner. Producer's right. Come on, guys. I'm dying! There's one of white guy hiding way where he belongs.

In the back. Holding it down. Hardly knows to keep a shuffle. I am with you. My thing about hooking up with strangers is it's like the cops. Like if you know who I am, you're legally obligated to tell me. Oh, yeah. Because, and I've said this before, my least favorite thing is when someone is leaving my house,

being after the hookup going, oh, and by the way, I'm a huge fan of your work. If I knew you knew who I was, I wouldn't have been such a fucking freak back there. You think that's the worst? What about when someone is leaving your room and they say, I hate to ask this? and I immediately know the next question is. Not the selfie. Can I get a son? Not the selfie.

That's never actually happening. I could do you one worse. One time when I was in Boston, I hooked up with a guy, and I stayed the night. I killed him. Crushed him. The next morning, when the sun came up and I could, like, see the decorations in the room, there was a signed picture from me on this. No!

That's so spooky. It was spooky. Wait, what was the shot? Like, what was the photo? It was just like one of my, like, head shots from when, you know, you signed a mail one out. It was nice, but it was just like... Did he submit for it? He had to purchase it on my website.

They got it. He was on shopping. Were you in drag when you guys met up? No, I was like just, it was like one of those weird nights where you just had the night off in a different city. So you just go to the gay bar because you want free alcohol. And he started flying with me, but he didn't give me any indication that he knew who I was. And I was also like me. Is there a chance that he didn't know who you were because you were out of drag?

No. Like, carmically, that was very crazy. Yeah. The weird attitude. When you came and went hot. I was giving him wicked the whole time. There was a guy hooked up with Layla McQueen, who's a fabulous makeup artist.

And then as they were done hucking up, she showed up to this town. And then as they were done hicking up, he was like, all right, I'll pick you up for the gig around 6 o'clock. No. He was her contact. Oh my God. I like being only subtly known.

This is a lot. Well, the thing is about Ree-Reary that you have to understand is that Ree-Reary may not be as public-facing famous. but she's famous in our community because literally the way I was I was rewit gives me a call one day this is the epitome of Riri we're having an after party she calls and says hey can I I met some people can I bring him to the after party and I say go ahead who are the people that she met Baz Lerman and his entourage she's like you met them that night at Akbar she brings Baz Lerman his assistant he was Tahrirman he was Tahr he was Tirling he was Tirling he was Tirling and hearing my notes about Elvis. But the thing about it, the thing about it is that I won't bring,

I'm not bringing just like random Jake's Matt's Simons. I was like, I want, I've hit a point now where I'm doing gagatry of who I bring to Joel's house. Why don't you bring me to something? Girl, we met four months ago. I was so attracted to rerew when we were. Yes, that was true.

I believe I went to you, didn't I? You did. And it was like, I was trying to be very cool, but I was a fan. And I was like, I'm not going to. announce it after we hook up that it's me but no I was we were at the

we were at an after party and we were just the tallest bitches there yeah so I you know I I love going to parties and like just chatting with people and I was just immediately drawn and you were there with a friend I was there with my friend Brendan Rawls who is a wonderful writer yes but we were yeah we were like minding our business in the corner

and it was the I Love Boosters premiere was wonderful the theme is Boosters but we like spotting each other and you came up and I was trying to be chill because I'm not trying to have somebody is, you know, like eight by 10 in my house after, just like, after gargling. But it was, it was like, it was fierce, but that's kind of the fun part about being in. Do they know you were stallion?

Uh, no. Never. I mean, no one sees me standing unless they see me outside. Like, I am, I'm wearing heels because I don't, I'm not in drag. I did put a nail on because I tried. We're all born naked in the rest of my bag. So I tried. But yeah, I'm like in heels.

I'm five, I'm six, six, six. 6-1, 6-2. So you can spot me. If you've seen a tall black girl on the east side. If you shop with Rui at Best Buy, you won't lose her. No, I am right about the kitchen aids. She's Wilson above the kitchen age. You can just see you right there.

My other favorite is we went and saw Zara Larson play those Globos one time. Early days, Zarr Larson. Riri on her way there is sort of like, oh, who is this girl again? Oh, she sings that. Okay, I think I know who that is. Midway through the performance, we're going, where is Riri? Where is Riri?

Oh, we text her. I'm in the green room with Zara. Obviously. Like, she finds her way in. Well, I think that was a real meeting of ass. You know, like, that was sort of like, if it can go in a circle, you have to pull each other in. But I think, like, I don't, but I don't really lie to get into those. That's really my true personality is someone who wants to be seated next to find shit.

Yeah. And that kind of works out for me. And like, yeah, we met in a lounge. We're now seated. We just met. It's all gorgeous. This is a meeting of minds. But it is like, I do, I like folk the effervesce.

And like, I think that's like the closest, the times I have walked myself, lied myself out of hookup states, whatever. It's like, I'm not, this rislessness is just like not something I can like give 22 minutes. So I have to leave. What's the go to? I mean, no, I'm a bad feminist. So like I use the fact that I bleed out of my body. I pulled up a full body anxiety attack because a man tried to feed me Easy Mac.

And I was like... More detail? Yeah. Okay, no, thank you so much for asking. So we were in college and I let a white man like invite me over to introduce me to Madman on DVD, which already I was not living my truth. And like we really should have looked at where my chemical balance was. I was sitting there.

My chemical balance. My favorite band. But I was sitting there watching him like stir. stir an easing mat cup from me. And I was like, I don't think this is... A cup, not even in the pot. That's the thing. And I'm of... That's what makes it easy. But no, there's something about, like,

God bless, love the sound of some good pussy. But no, that wasn't that. That was powder. That was me in a cup. And I just sat there. I was like, I don't... I'm of Stofer's experience. I really can't do this. And I just felt, I, like, lied. myself into shaking to have any anxiety attack and I went like to get out. But that's what I used

to do like more that like I'm back to doing away games. I used to like I stopped for a while because you can't be in people's homes just like safety wise for me. I could not go to a guy I would never leave my house. It's a really different situation especially like this was Blackberry

times you know like it wasn't even even find my friends. Yeah I couldn't even find nobody could find me. I feel like if you're a woman and you're hooking up with a straight guy you should be allowed to have a friend sit in a living room. And I think the guy should be like, I understand. Yeah. It should be a very big, strong gay man. Yeah. Well, I have a couple that know exactly where I am at all times, including this one. But like, it is. You're like, Joel is sitting in the

living room. And he actually has pins up rage. Joel is just vaping outside. Just viving, waiting. Jam is like kicking it. No, but it is like the safety of it all. It's like that will trigger. Yeah, I feel like the thing is is the privilege of not having to love. to just be able to say, I'm leaving is something that like... Yeah, there's like more mechanations that have to be done. I was in a date. You know rice to riches, the rice pudding company in L.A., in New York City?

I was like, what was that going to be? No, that did sound right. I want to point out that it sounded racist because I looked at it. You heard of rice to riches. But I was see because you are the host to show and I respect you. Yes. So I was at Rice to Rich on a dream on a date with this guy. And it was so going so poorly.

And at one point I looked to him and I said, said, I feel like this is really not going well. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I said, I think this is a bad date. And he was like, well, and I was like, it just feels like you're not super into me, which is making me less into you. So I think right now what we should do, we should go back to the bar where we have a friend in common.

And then we can just part ways. Because Thorgy, because Thorgy was our friend we had in common. Well, there's your first. That's the problem. I met him through Thorgy. And I asked him on a date. And I was like, maybe we'll just go back to the bar. Let's start where we started.

We can both convene to our hinge, who is Dorgy. And then we can just go our separate ways. And we ended up doing that. You talked him through sliding doorsing this. You're like, let's just take a step back to where this started. You're not going to go that other way. The honesty is really, like, that takes a lot of. Notoriously bad at aborting it.

In fact, I have almost always gone through with it to the point where I actually hesitate to tell this story. And in fact, John Michael has instructed me never to tell the story. As he leans closer to the microphone. I literally one time went over to a man's apartment. He was definitely sent me very out-of-date photos. It barely looked the same. It was like, and you always got a clock in the bathroom selfie with the phone. How many cameras are on that iPhone?

Let's carbon date the photo a little bit. I look for a curve in the mirror to see if they've done something to do it. Sometimes you can just tell the filter is like from 2012. Yeah, original Instagram goes. I arrive there and I immediately know that this is not something that I'm going to enjoy, but I don't want, I am so conflict-averse that what I chose to do instead of aborting the hookup was to say to him, hey, do you like roleplay? And he was like, yeah, what's the scenario? And I said, what if I like wasn't into you? This is fucking crazy.

I love it. I love it, babe. And I said, what if I wasn't into you and like I wasn't really attracted to you at all, but like I was here because of blackmail. And like I had to go through with this because you have something on me. And like the whole time I'm not really enjoying it, but like you are and it's like a power fantasy for you. And this man was like, hell yeah. Wow. Yes. And so I dutifully had sex, um, pretending to not enjoy it. Can you tell me what you did what you did with this gentleman?

We had full penetrative sex. I'm asking what you did. Roll out. Oh, we both. Oh, you both flip-flop, girl. Well, because he was, he was, the way it started is he wanted to bottom. But because of the scenario,

I couldn't get bricked up. Stay hard in order for that to happen. This is crazy. This is absolutely crazy. I was in a very similar situation once where the guy was not like his photos at all, but when he opened the door, I was just like immediately struck with meth in.

Like there was just, There is the stuff everywhere. It just looked really messy. He took me to the bedroom and he goes, this is the room. Whatever you do, don't put any wet liquids on this counter. It's very valuable to me. Was I holding any wet liquids? No.

Was I planning on it? No. Were you sweaty? No. Just my hand on it? You bitch? And so he's just kind of going off. He jumps on the bed and starts getting naked and I just look around the room and I go,

uh, uh, uh, and I look and he had water-based lube. And I went, oh, was that water-based lube? Oh, I only like silicone base loop. I have some in my car and I turned around, that's beautiful. Walked out, blocked him on the app, and got on my car. I thought you're going to say you put the water base loop all over the couch.

All over the counter. That's crazy. That did cross my mind. I was like, I could really piss him off, but he was also kind of hiked up. Was he senior than he looked in his photos? Yes. And he looked at 10 years older because meth will do that.

If you see someone who would... Why is every meth head in L.A. have like a 10-inch dick. Why are they all just hung crazy? It's the hard water in the shower. I will say this. If you're a little bit heavier than you are in your grinder photo, it means you've been living well. If you're a little skinnier than you are,

this is not a good sign. I'm so sorry that is untrue. Okay, because I think... Tell me more about your grinder experience. We're not talking about 2013. It's, there, you can like run into something, like a little bit of softness. Yes, maybe.

But then there's like a switch of SSRI situation where I've run into the like talking a big game, really believing in themselves. and then it's like I'm stuck in some sort of Mama Morton-ass, like put it on my tities and let me tell me about your troubles. And there is a correlation between that. And this is someone who is medicated. So you're talking about like Zoloft Wake game. Yeah.

And sometimes mean, so not living well. Not living well. It's like I think, I don't know. And LA is a hard, it's a hardship because everyone is so unwell. Also, it's really interesting that out of the three of us, Joel, you're the one the serial killer's going to get. Oh, sure. Because you're going to go through with it. Because, yeah, like, at least some of, we've been trying to get out of the situation.

I feel like you're a Sierra Kill and I need to leave. Can I have advice on something? Yeah. I fear that my grinder pictures are too out of date. Pull up. And I'm going to pass it around the room and let you all look at it. But I will say, in my defense, I was really at peak fitness when I took these photos. And I planned to get back.

But how old are they? No, how old are they? I would say, okay, first of all, start by telling me how old is too old. I believe anything over like a year and a half Then these are way too old I think you should be updating them Just because they're good pictures Does not mean that's you

The pictures a year and a half old Has anyone did Well so you're catfishing people No I've never come to your hotel room And be like oh you're a little different Never not once Or are they always just like I'm about to fuck Bob I never had anyone be like you don't like your pictures

But I will acknowledge that like I need to be back in the gym So you're looking at like your accountability to the community Yeah I'm trying to figure out what my part is You have to call yourself in I'm asking if I need to change my photos, but I plan to get back. I plan to get back. So you want to bank them. So just bank the photos.

Yeah. And when you circle back, because you'll obviously look exactly the same with age. What a nice reward for you to be able to go back to those photos. But I just want to say, I'm re-evaluating. So that's the way of the light. These photos are way too old. I don't look like this anymore. No, it's a year and a half ago.

Okay, okay. It's basically from last year. So there's five photos. I do forget that my purpose. profiles are up. Are they beautiful? It's just, yeah. Are they of a time?

You have to click it and then swipe left and right. Yeah. I was just rolling. It's rough that really knows how to work grinder better than me. If I would have seen that, I would be like, that's not you. I'm sorry, and I think and look, that's not here. If you're shaving, you can't post a beard photo.

Yeah, I mean, that was the thing. This is a her for you have the beard sometimes. Oh. But that's no. Sometimes I have the beer. Oh, I'm so sorry. No, that's not. You need to take us down.

You think you need to change them down? I think all of them. I think you need to go to the bathroom right now and redo all of them. Yeah, about those aren't you? I have to change all my photos? Not just a. Bob. I think, I think, I think two, two works.

Two works. No. Three and one, no. Four, if you grow the beard back, sure. Give me a week. And five, no. No. If you update the other ones, I think you're allowed to keep five.

as a sort of like this is where we could go together. This is an investment. This is your investment. If we go to the gym together, this is what you could get. If you're willing to hang out long. Money down today,

you get the shoulders tomorrow. I'll adjust that. Thank you all for your feedback. You want to cut me down. Here's a lot. I mean, the dick picks don't change. That's the thing. I don't send dick.

The dick don't change. Oh, really? You don't want to end up on like. some weird website. Well, too late. Oh, you're all there's. I've been on the websites. In fact, I'm pissed because my nude's leaked in 2017,

and when they resurfaced to this day, they're still the ones from 2017. And it's like, baby? We got some new ones out. I'm sending them out with reckless abandon. I'm not even using the album and Grindr. I'm begging someone to leave them. Is that respect of your profile?

Like, is there something people being like, oh. These fucking faggots do not respect the profile. I know they're on a telegram somewhere. Sharing them about, but not sharing them publicly. They're on signal? Have your news leaked? No.

I stopped, but I stopped sitting them like three years ago, three or four years. I am maybe a little too excessive. I mean, I think that there's something exciting about seeing a celebrity's news, though. I came in third at BFD with my big old tities. You have big boobs. And this is a low-tide. This is the thing. She kept the ass.

She kept the boobs. So, like, these are low-tied tities. He's a low-tide. But like, do send a dude, I do it invisible or like, so it's disappeared. Yeah. If you send me an invisible pick, I'm going to come and I'm going to bomb your car. How am I supposed to circle back and remember who the fuck you are? Yeah.

Don't send me no invisible. No, no, it disappearing. No, really. Oh, okay. Well, you know those are also the people who would, like, send a disappearing one. You then not recognize them the next time and be like, oh, you don't remember me? Yeah. Like that, the mental illness on the internet with that of like, I'm trying to be demure, but I need your attention is like, I don't know.

Gay-gay, we try to have sex with you? That I don't mean like a closeted guy. I mean like a gay guy. Yeah, well, yeah, that closet part, definitely. Not, like, actively. I get people really obsessed with me. Can the three of us try to Riz you and we'll see who we feel would succeed? Yeah, no, you could try.

I'm immune. Like, I'm immune to, like, gay men. Another piece of context we should reveal about Rie Rearie, sorry to blow up your spot, but she is queer, she is bi. I am queer. She is dipped in both pawns. But how much of the gay man fucking have you done? No, no. That's not a part of being queer.

It's not. It's not. It's just a really. To be a queer woman, you have to fuck gay men. Tell that to lie to women, Alice. No, I really, like, I have had gay men try to, like, not what's good, my, not, like, Charlie will say, like, this coming up to me. But there have people like, oh, like, but I'm like, no, you're just obsessed with me. Like, I just will immediately go, oh, sweetie, no.

Oh, this isn't. You know, I have. I've made out with quite a few of my friends. This is not, which you don't want this. You want my attention. You want to talk to one of my friends. You want to be like close. You want to be betwixt my tits.

That is a different want. Is that what you guys want from us as well? Is that what we're not realizing they actually don't want with us. I just want to be. Betwixt our tits. And wear our wigs. Like the, yeah, the wig of it all too for the two of you. It's like, well.

And there's something. For the one of you. The one of you. The one of you. Well, it's tough. I quit drag. I heard that. Dying art form.

Dying art form. It really is. Yeah. Can I say something truly chilling to both of you? What? Actually, all three of you. That's worth of you. Is that we are, I think, less than two years away from an actual BFA in drag.

You know there is a liberal arts. There's a liberal arts universe. There's probably a class. It's probably folded into like clownings at some like theater school. Why is clowning? Well, no, you're not wrong. You're not wrong. No, no, it's definitely a unit.

I'm not into the academia of drag, to be honest. And there's always like some professor of sociology. Women, gender, sexuality, study. Who does, like, this, like, annual drag show. And the show is too esoteric. It's too heady. Well, call out Sasha Valour by name. Shake the pedals out of your way.

And they think they're doing too much. And they're trying to make drag. They're trying to like make it academic. The intellectualization of it. Have you ever had like a fan come up to you at a meet and be like, oh, I did my project on? Have I ever? Yes.

And I'm always like, what? You and everything. Here's the thing though, I would much rather take like a slightly more cerebral like intellectualized drag show than like when we think, then like just a competent like soulless sort of like, I learned how to do this by, you know. Paint by numbers. Like all the baby queens now.

Kind of. Because the baby queens used to be ugly and they would throw their bodies around. And now they're pretty. Dragons come quite homogenized. Everyone wants the Raven face or the Naomi face or the Trixie face. Those are the three faces they want. And now we're getting a couple of Crystal Method faces I've seen around town as well. Oh, good for Crystal.

You know what I mean? But I do. There is something like I would, I'm with Joel. Like I'd rather someone in their study decide like, oh, this is what I like and this is what like pushes me creatively. Then like you're just putting it. Some of these bitches are on, you know are on Claude or TragedyBT being like, what do you expect to be the next trend in drag

from these makeup artists from like, can you do an amalgamation of the past couple seasons and like put it together? It's like, fuck that. I mean, speaking of lying, it is like you, the shift post AI in the drag race versus is shocking. Because you watch some of those old verses when those girls were really writing those verses. Or Magami's random?

Today we're Magami and AI or really all the verses. might be experiencing something that's a little different. I think what you're experiencing is there are four of us writing everyone's verses. I've written verses. So it's me, Ocean Kelly, Magami, and then one other person, and we're all battle rapping ourselves. What's the fee?

I do it for free because... Oh, that's kind. Love it again. Love the game. My punch-up fees are higher than that. I mean, I do it for free because they're not going to want to pay me what I would want to charge. You know what I mean? I wrote for Joey J for the rapping. roast of um well congratulations because that was great and but i was battling ocean kelly like we we we you know i've got battle rapped several times what's so funny yeah Kelly has battled herself Kelly has oh yeah oh Kelly has fully battled herself in a ruPaul's drag race

rap battle i wonder if she was like i wonder which of me they like never today like that i feel that i decide which version of myself i like every day what is one thing you would never lie about in the context of sex lover dating? See, it's so hard to think about my line because I hold it so loosely. It's like a rainbow. But I think like probably just my... In terms of dating, I have a...

As you know, I have trouble being wrong. I probably would have like... I have to have like my communication style. Like you have to kind of like know that when I need to be inside, I need to be inside. When I need to be outside, I need to be outside. I need to be outside. I can't.

lie about like this version of myself of like who my people are like what I'm interested in because like that has always been I've been in situations longer than I needed to be because I was like oh maybe they like accept like the fact that I'm always out with the boys and like I'm this musical theater bitch and like this is when my family looks like and all that stuff and like didn't know they didn't they didn't they would go to fuck about it I yeah similarly I don't think I could lie about like my impatience because I had a situation where I had an ex who was always like, he just wanted me to do stuff with him.

And we'd go to a concert, we'd get there before the show started, and then wait the whole night for the show to go. And I would just be sitting there having, like, anxiety about the whole thing. And I was like, I'm pretending to be like, oh, I'm having fun for you. But I wasn't. And I think that really ruined it. What is statistic, in terms of your stats on a dating profile, which, what is like, you must, must be 100 p.

honest about it. And what is is there one that's got wiggle? Oh, I mean, it's just the politics of it all. It's like, I can't because like a lot of like women, when you're swapping with women, it's not an issue but for men, they now they don't realize we realize that moderate

means they're conservative. So it's like, and then also now if it's just not there. Like that's now been the new move. What's worse is not political. Yeah. Well, not political. And I'm like, kill yourself. I'm like, that's crazy. We got a libertarian in the house.

I mean, there are options. You got to have some options. But that one, I can't. I wouldn't, because it's just like, I can't even pretend. What is a stat that's okay? Absolutely not okay to lie about. And what's one that's okay to lie about?

I think that, honestly, I think there is a wiggle room for almost every stat. Except I don't think you should, one, you should not be lying about your status, obviously. But when it comes to, like, physical traits, I think height you get an inch of wiggle room up

and you get two inches of wiggle room down. Because some guys will make themselves shorter because some guys are attracted to shorter people. I think with weight, you have a 20-pound wiggle room in either direction. Wait, what profiles are asking you how much you weigh? The game room. Oh, my God.

It puts height, weight, dick length. It's got everything on there. Oh, my God. Not these biometrics. Not this Nouveau SCAD. I like that when I asked the question, you went straight to like a real, like. Yeah. Yeah, that was crazy.

I was like, oh. I was like, you can lie about your dick size by two inches. I don't really care. Yeah. Well, this is my thing about like, like, lying about your weight, there's wiggle room and weight, obviously, because, like, who knows? Muscle. Like, 160 looks different on a lot of people. In fact, I find putting specific weight on your profile kind of pointless.

It's not very helpful. It doesn't really tell a story. Well, if you put your height and your weight and your body type, it's a lot. Sure. I think body type makes a little bit more sense. But my other thing is, is like, you lie. you fudge the weight a little bit, you show up. No one's really going to be able to clock it unless it's like egregious. Yeah.

It's a tough. Babe, I'm gonna see you. I don't mind to look like how much, like if you tell me, first of all, I, I am attracted to short guys and tall guys. Like if you're really tall or if you're really short, I find being very short or being very tall, very attractive. I will, I will fuck a guy who's ever trying. I'm not against it. But because I am tall, I will know if you're under six two. I immediately know you're under 6-2.

You lied about that. So when I go to town, my first thing I do is I put in 6-6-6-and-over, and then I switch it to 5-4-and-under. That's the first two things I do in every-bye. Five-old. What are you doing? Every town. You can't fit in the same car.

What the fuck are you talking about? Every town, 6-6 and older. 6-6 and over. How many people in every town are 6-6 or hot? No, okay, 6-6-and-old is usually, but the second person is 100 miles away. This is usually the case. but I did get to fuck a six foot 10 guy in Portland one time. So you're just collecting data.

Yeah. This is crazy. You're not out here for love. But also, your short is relative to. Because short for you is still like 5'8. Like that's... Five, four, and below. But that's just mess.

He's trying to look down. That's you bored in the Delta Lounge. But like... I will say, though, like, I understand a little bit more why straight men lie about their height than gay men about their height. Why? Here's why. Here's why.

Because I don't think, obviously there are gay men that discriminate against people sexually based on their height, sure. I do think that it is less common. I do think that gay guys, like, I think a lot of straight women are leaving money on the table with some of these men because I know some straight women, not Riri. Thank you. Who are so cruel and so aggressively mean about short men. It's not necessary.

I think that, like, I would understand. I think it's why a, a. straight man in particular would feel a certain kind of way about like his height because I think that they I think short straight man experience more discrimination it is definitely it's kind of fun to tease toxic straight men about being under six feet tall it is one of those things like honestly it brings it does bring me joy um to tease a straight man who's like annoying me yeah specifically for being under six feet tall I've definitely said to a man and I'm kinder but I have said to a gay man who was shorter I can't hear you up here.

Well, that's fair. That's funny. That's funny. Why are you on my face of Akbar? Leave me alone. But I will say the leaving material on the table, I think that is a function of like the fact that we are catching dick digitally versus in real life. So like that like having those metrics of like, oh, I won't do below this. And now we assume below 511 and I assume you're lying.

So then you just ruin people's lives. If you like, like you came out with some motion and you were five, eight to me, you could get it because nobody has any. But if I'm dealing with the, with fucking rye or whatever, it does, I do clock it. I will say I clock it. But also, I'm a big bitch. So it is like, it's tough. I mean, I had a female friend once tell me, Joel, I deserve to feel small. And that is, that was her reasoning.

And I think that's totally fair. And it was me. Anybody has any right to disqualify anyone for. for any reason that they want. Of course. But I just think that like, I mean, let's be honest. Like, let's be, let's get this out there. Hight has nothing to do with any other antithetical,

like, part of their body. Oh, no. Because like, most of the guys I know who are 5'7 and below are jacked as hell with giant dicks. And it is God's way of balancing the scales. It all- Sometimes God gives with one hand. It always just to the right. It only makes the energy that matters.

But I will say, like the first, Because I have been tall. I've been tall in my class like the entire time. And so my class, I haven't been in school and how long. But like if you have the mental

of having had to be the bottom of the pyramid and gym, like there is something in your body of like wanting to feel small. And the first time I was at a college party

and a man lifted me up and put me up on a speaker. I have never like, are you can't hear the Ariana notes of squealing. I did. I'm like, like out of nowhere.

I didn't know that was something I needed. Yeah. And I did not like that person. But I had never. felt carefree. Are you all ever feel small?

Yeah. Well, yeah, my husband's 6-2 and I'm 5-9, but he's also He's baby girl. He's baby girl. Did he spelt? Yeah. Yeah.

Got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I hook up with like a 6-8 black guy who's like really built. Like consistently? Yeah, he's like a regular hookup. Do you want to share his number or something? Love to climb.

Well, and let me tell you one. He is huge. And he can really get me going to it. He has a special bed. Boom. Yeah, he has like a. a sex dungeon in his house. I don't give me that number anymore.

There's this thing called Tall Tour. Tall Tour. There's a big of... What is Tall Tour? I know the Tall Tour. There's this tall tour, which is like... It started, I think, in North Carolina, and it's these, like, straight boys

who are all, like, six, seven and over. And they've started, like, they're going city to city and inviting, like, tall people from all communities. And, like... Because I was a seven-foot man. It's, like, so insane. They're so big. And I was texting with a girlfriend.

friend being like, are we going to finally do it? Because they were here a couple months ago. I was talking to Mo. And we really tried to decide if we were going to go. And I was like, I don't know because am I going to spend my whole life buying specialty sheets for a specialty bed? Like, the fact that my way. But it also, I think, I know I will spend a lot of time, like, talking life into someone

up. But I kind of want to go. You should do it. You should feel slow. I know. It would be nice. I can wear my high stuff. There comes of height where your voice starts sounding crazy.

No change. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. I know that's ablest. I know. I know. It's something to do with the era.

But you reach a high where you're, where you, where you sound. Andre the giant. I'm just so, I'm so fascinated that like they found this like hole in the market. And they're like finding community up there. Sure did. They sure. They're fine. I'm sure they're finding plenty.

Coles in the market. This weekend. Oh, yeah. But it really like watching this tour that this one man got stuck in the middle seat on like a record there because they're on a budget. You know, as someone who, as someone who's in an inner height, relationship currently. I will say one of the best things about it is because he's constantly looking down to talk to me at parties.

We have found so many pieces of contraband on the ground of the party. Oh, yeah. IDs, passports, phones, all because he is looking directly down near the ground to talk to me at the partner. There's nothing better than floor drug. Both of our partners are pretty short. One of them is like five, five. those five four, five, three.

And you put them together, that's almost 11 feet. Come on fast match. You don't have two boyfriends. You have one boyfriend that's two boyfriends stacked up. In a trisco, baby. No rascoles. Go to that bank. They can do it.

All right. As we come to the closing, one last thing I wanted to think about was all of us, to some degree, you're a writer, you write scripted television. I do. I write scripted television. I'm an actor. You guys create. These personas.

I'm a writer. You're a writer as well. I'm a home. I've been on TV. I've been on TV. I wrote a new times by selling books. Predisposes us to create stories that are maybe not true in the dating. I mean, I will say that outside of dating with my friends, I do like to do silly lies.

Yeah. Like I get a real kick out of telling a completely unsurious lie that doesn't really affect anything. even if it's something like if one of my friends, it's a bit I haven't really done it a long time, but I used to, if someone goes to bathroom and peas, I'll go in and after then, I'll be like my God, it really reeks of piss in there. Even though it doesn't.

Something about it tickles me. Or I love to tell a story about someone who's coming, whether or not, or I do like telling those kind of lies. And I think it is part of maybe my creativity trying to express itself in day-to-day lives. I get in a lot of trouble because I will tell what I think

is such a hyperbolic, obvious lie. And then people, we were talking about this this weekend. I, once on Twitter, back in 2019, when Normani's motivation music, I posted a clip of the section of the music video where she booty bumps the basketball after doing a pure way. And I said, she did this in one take. Jet fuel can melt steel beat. And people went, it went, that on its own went a little, like, fairly viral.

And then somebody in the comments, it started to circulate amongst people who did not realize I was lying. And they said, there's no way she did this in one take. And I said, actually, I'm the director of the music video. She, I can tell you for certain that she did it in one take. And then people started to believe that. And then people, a third layer, started saying, well, no, it says that these two men, it says in Wikipedia that these two guys directed it. And I said, that is the names that I use when I direct music videos to separate it from my comedy work. And when I tell you, blogs started to pick it up, that Normani did this in one. one take. I love it. The director of Normani's

music video motivation says that she did this in one take. It spun so wildly out of control because I thought it was so obvious. Did you ever have any communication with Normani or the directors? I was on an NBC show at the time and she was coming on to guest coach the voice and NBC reached out

and they did try to coordinate like a little social media moment synergy but it just didn't. Invite her. Yeah, Brian. Let's get Normani on the top of the camera. You've got to invite yourself. You have an open. Your director misses you. Yes. The director of your famous music video, iconic music video, would like to see you in the studio, please.

But also, when you were recounting that story, you put on your, like, serious voice. Like, no, as, like, you know, the thing about my personalities is this. I do that all the time, which I started when I was a kid because I wanted adults to take me seriously, like, at Cheeseca Factory. And I didn't realize, like, I would be like, I'm in the mix. I also have feelings about Joe Lieberman. I don't know. And so, like, that was it. But I still do that, and I didn't realize that that's, like, me lying.

I just will, like, yeah, I definitely saw in 1917, and we'll talk about, like, a full war sequence with people. Oh, I've done this many times. I will just keep going, and I have no feelings about it. People don't realize the power of context clues to guide your way. Yeah, no, I did think act three was slow, but it's totally fine. I think it worked in the edit. You can just keep going.

I did recently decide a couple, maybe not recent, it was like six years ago. Sure. Because I used to do this thing where, like, just to keep the conversation, because I love conversation, I would lie about a film that I've seen it if I've not seen it. But I decided, like, six years ago, like, no, just say you haven't seen the film. And that's the same thing to do. But the only issue is that it will shut down the conversation because now, like, I tried to call a friend last night to talk about the movie that I call Anne Hathaway's Shoes Down and Stores with a Shotgun. Oh, yeah. That's what I call.

It's called. You're going to see it tonight. We're going to see it tonight. And I had to find someone to talk about it with. but I was excited to know someone and I can see that excitement when someone wants to talk to you about a thing and then you say oh yeah

and I feel like that's one of the lies that people do a lot lying about a thing you saw when you did not see. I had to stop. But lying can be affirming. Like that's the thing. It's like there are detrimental lies

but that is just like the joy in community and sometimes that community means you go to like say I saw Verity already with Ann and Dakota Johnson. I haven't seen it but I could talk about bangs

for about 35 minutes. I just don't think that that hurts anybody. I've learned to just, I can't lie at all anymore because I talk about my life so much, like twice a week on a podcast. So if I say something and then I retell the story and it's like slightly different, then someone's going to call in and be like,

oh, that's a lie. Why would you do that? So I just am like completely honest. Now, what I do feel like my life has gotten into is I put myself in dark situations and I've been called the worst-behaved friend by a lot of my friends because I will do crazy shit

just to have a good story. Like the other day, I got off the Burbank airport, got off the plane at the Burbank airport and threw up on the tarmac. And that's a great story. That's a true story. It's a true story.

Okay. Sort of opening a shut. Absolutely, that's exactly what happened. Well, I had been drinking with Nicole Page Brooks all morning. Oh, that's that story. And then we went to the Delta Lounge and then it turned into like a kind of a competition to see. It was basically that brunch after. And the guy recognized Nicole.

So he just started giving a shot. And then I was like wasted when I got on the plane. So then the whole flight I was pulling back. If you're going to throw up at an airport, Burbank is the one. Burbank is the one. Can I just say flying on a Burbank is such a better experience. Oh, it's trash. No.

No, me, ball. What are you talking about? You need to know. There's no security. They don't even check your back. They're like, I don't put this in a fucking flight. Get it in there. The tarmac is too short in a storm, and you will be diverted till L.A.x when you're coming back in a hurricane

and the earthquake when you head back to Burbank to get your car. Yes, this happened three years ago during the earthquake, and I haven't gone since. Well. Also, they don't have a lounge or anything. They do have a flavor town though. People are getting smashed at that bar, though. That is good people watching. Shout out to Burbank.

Shout to anybody working at Burbank. Bob Hope Airport. Shout out to y'all. Oh, Bob. All right, quick rapid fire before we close out. Bigger lie, worst lie. I'm on my way or I've never done this before. I'm on my way.

On my way. Black people, you can't be trusted. I'm on my way is brutal. When were you a better lie? Are you now or are you at 22? 22. No? Probably now, yeah.

Yeah. Lots more to go. Would you rather be a great liar or unable to tell a lie at all? Great liar. Unable to tell a lie. Unable to tell a liar. I would love that. Shout out to Jim Carrey, liar, liar.

Would you rather someone lie to you about the reason why they are breaking up with you or tell you the truth? The truth. I want the truth. Yeah, probably the truth. It'll be easier to get over it with the truth. I've been told, I had a guy sit down and straight to my face be like, I am no longer in love with you. And that helped me get over it. So much faster.

Well, because then there's no. if stands or butts about it. There's no arguing with that. Because if you're going to start giving caveats, anyone here watch Love Island or am I the only one? Oh, I have a problem, yes. So when, when, sorry y'all will be out of this one, but when Sincere was like, if only I had more time. That's a lie. So now, guess what?

She comes back and you have more time. And he's caught, yeah. So now you got to make a new lie. And it's like, why would I want to hurt your feelings? Well, the consequences is such that now your ass is getting dragged for having curls and being a dumb ass and not be able to pronounce anything. Exactly. You cannot make it about something that could actually happen to then remove the reason for the person.

Because the producers are listening and they will make that happen. The producers of your life are listening. We are in the Truman Show. Well, incredible. It's good. Thanks for having. You guys, this is we were not done quite yet. We don't have one today because we spent too long yapping.

But if you would like to send us a voicemail, if you have a piece of advice that you would like answer by me and my incredible panel of guests, Leave us a voicemail. Please, 60 to 90 seconds, tops. Get to your questions fast. 213, 379, 98-51. That's 213, 379-9-8-5-1.

60 to 90 seconds max, please. You can also email us, Intimacy Coordinator Pod at gmail.com. You can email us voice notes as well. Same rules apply there. We love screenshots. We love context. You send us whatever you'd like,

and we might read it on the podcast. That's intimacy coordinator pod at gmail.com. Now it's time to get to y'all's plugs. This has been such a fun episode. Bob the drag queen, what are you doing these days? What do you want people to know? You can go to see the drag queen.com. I am on tour for the now clap tour

doing a brilliant new hour of stand-up comedy. I pride myself on being very hilarious. And I will tell you, for whatever it's worth, whoopee Goldberg agrees. And so does Jessica Carson. Come on, sister, Maryleland. Do you trust them? And so does.

Jolkin booster. And Meatball. And? I can't wait to see it. Wow. She can lie. We'll not lie. Meatball, what are you doing these days?

What can the people find? Go listen to my podcast Sloppy Seconds with Big Drip Room Meatball on Mom Network. Come to my party, Fat Slut every third Friday precinct. And it's also going on tour. When does this come out? Just go to the website, fatslut.com. Fatslut.com. You got fastslut.com?

That is great. That was very expensive. Did you have to buy it from somebody? I had to buy it from someone. How much he told how much it was? It was like $5,000. Whoa. But worth it.

But it's better than fastletl.A.com. Yeah, you don't want that. No, fastlet. That's, you got to go to global. Fastlet.com is amazing. Yeah, that's pretty incredible. Is that too much?

No. It's gaggy, but I'm happy for me. I think in the long run. I've been like 10 or 20,000 just to get their name. You needed it. No. I think that's going to, it pays for itself. Yeah.

You guys are all talking about it was a bad idea. No, no. No. No. No. I realize that if it was me, I would have been like, girl, I can just have it. And you need it.

You just have. It's something that I would not have been able to will myself to do. I would have done, I would have done like fat slut worldwide or something. Dot WorldWild. Yeah. No, no, no. No, you did it was the best thing. Yeah, keep it simple.

Branding, branding is important. Rearie, my love, would you like the people to know? Where can they find you? What are you doing? Yeah, I'm just at Reesquared, just living my life on the internet, watching couples therapy again. So enjoy that. Check out any of the wonderful shows that she's written on. Sex Lives of College Girls Killing at her babysitters club.

Beautiful work. You guys, I'm Joel Kim Booster. This has been another episode of intimacy coordinator. If you like what you heard, please give us a rating. Five stars only, please, wherever you're listening to this. If you have notes about the podcast, put them in a five-star review, because that's the only way I'll look at them. Don't you want to be honest about the review?

What if they think is it for? But still have, but they have like a note that could actually change the trajectory of this podcast. That I'm going to need them to put it in a five-star review. Yeah, what the hell is wrong with you? It's about lying. The whole show's about honesty. No. But I think give it five stars and then say whatever you have to say.

I'll give it five stars right now. Right now. A four star review really doesn't help anybody. I'm putting it on, I'm going to give me it four stars or five stars this second. Great. Thank you. Thank you. We'll be back next week with more Intimistic Coordinator Pod.

In the meantime, have a great day. Bye-bye. Bye.