Bad Dates with Jameela Jamil - Listen Now: Even the Royals

Episode Date: September 26, 2023

How many times have you thought about what it would be like to be a king or queen? What if we told you... that there’s a darker side to royalty. From the creators of Even the Rich comes a new Wondery+ exclusive podcast called EVEN THE ROYALS, where hosts Brooke and Aricia pull back the curtain on royal families, past and present from all over the world. Royal status might be bright and shiny, but it comes at the expense of everything else, like your freedom, your privacy, and sometimes, your head. This is just a preview of Even the Royals. Follow Even the Royals on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Even the Royals exclusively and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Be honest, how many times have you dreamed of being a king or queen? Who doesn't want to live a pampered life full of fancy dinners and a team of butlers to meet your every need? But what if we told you there's a darker side to royalty, and that more often than not, life as a prince or princess is anything but a fairytale. From the creators of Even the Rich comes a new podcast Even the Royals, where hosts, Brooke and Eresha pull back the curtain on royal families, past and present from all over the world. Even the royals covers everything from the stories you thought you knew like Mary Antoinette, who was actually a victim of viral propaganda campaigns, and what followed was a series of impossible-to-believe events

that led to her eventual beheading. Or Catherine de Medici. History branded her as a cold and power-obsessed manipulator and assumed that she was responsible for one of the most devastating massacres in French history. But as an orphan, she spent her life as a powerless hostage, and her determination to rise to power and preserve her dynasty led her to some dark places and desperate measures. The people wearing the crowns might laugh and cry and fall in love just like us, but their jealousies and secret affairs have the power to change the cause of history. You're about to hear a preview of Even the Royals, and while you're listening, follow Even the Royals on the Wondery app.

A quick note about our show. While some scenes are dramatized, we promise we did our homework and everything is based on facts. And a royal heads up. Today's episode contains swearing that would have the royal court calling for our heads. Please be advised. So Brooke, you and I have been friends for a long time. Yeah, and you know what, honestly, not long enough. I want to have you a long time ago. You know, I don't disagree at all. Good times. Yeah. We've kind of been through it all, you know? We have, yeah, parking cars for celebrities. Yes. Living together. Yes. Having arguments about how to put the toilet paper in the role correctly or who turned magnets upside down. Yeah. Real serious

stuff. Yeah. Yeah. We get into the nitty-gritty. And here's something else I think our listeners should know about us. We live in breathe rom-coms. Literally, I feel like that's one of the times where I'm being completely serious. Yep. And we also love the dole-eyed cousin of the rom-com,

the Princess movie. But these stories always end after the Princess Mary's, the Prince, and allegedly lives happily ever after. Like, we never see the part where they get into a screaming match about whose turn it is to clean the moat, you know? Yeah, and honestly, I need to see that. That's how you can really tell where the love is is when you see two people fight, yeah?

But all jokes aside, Royal Life is hard. I mean, sure, you get to wear a tiara, but you can also get exiled. Or beheaded. Right, and we're not talking Disney movies. Like, the real life, uncensored version is usually more like Game of Thrones meets Vanderpump rules. Ugh, what a great mashup. And that brings us to why we're here.

Brooke and I have so much fun pulling back the curtain on the world's biggest celebrities and family dynasties over on Even the Rich, that we wanted to do the same on a show all about Royals. So in this new series, we'll be sharing stories about some Royals you may have heard of, and some you like we have not. So Brooke, speaking of someone everyone knows of, but who most people don't actually really know, when I say Marie Antoinette, where does your mind go? Listen, I know what most people would say, but here's the thing, when we auditioned for even the rich, they

asked us who our favorite royals were, and you said Marie Antoinette, and you were like, she didn't actually say let them eat cake, and I've never forgotten it. Oh my God, this is really hitting me in the fields. And you know, while she was a wig wearing fashion icon of her time who ended up getting beheaded, the truth of Marie's story and why she was killed is way more complicated than cake.

Like, what if I told you all of this was because of really bad PR, that she was basically the victim of a total bogus propaganda campaign with pornographic cartoons? Okay, well, I know nothing and I'm now on board. Yeah, this story truly wild and that's just the beginning. I mean, if you think a bunch of nude pictures is bad. Grab those pearls to clutch for when you hear what she's ultimately accused of. Honestly, it's almost too shocking to believe.

Okay. So this is the story that shows how rumors can get you killed. You're ready, Brooke? Oh, I am so ready. It's October 1793 in Paris. Queen Marie Antoinette of France is riding in the back of an open wagon. Her hands are bound and her once fabulous hair has been hacked off. She's weak and she's half starved, but she still manages to sit up straight.

She chose her outfit carefully today. A pristine morning dress, pedicote, and bonnet. All white. She's determined to carry herself like a queen, not like a criminal. Now pulling on context clues, I'm sure you've guessed she's on her way to be executed for high crimes against France. I did have a feeling maybe that was happening, yes. Yeah. So a huge crowd gathers in the plastula revolution to hurl insults at Marie.

Now most of these insults are about how she's a traitor and a sexual deviant. Marie wants to yell back at them, but the people didn't listen to Marie during her trial, so why would they now? And part of her is like, fuck them. But then she thinks of her kids. And a pit forms in her stomach when she wonders if her children will remember her as a villain too.

Marie finally arrives at the center of the square. Her eyes shoot up to a platform where the executioner and the guillotine await. It's only a few steps at the top, but for Marie, it might as well be a thousand. She shrugs off the soldier who's leading her to the stairway. She doesn't need or want his help. She's doing this alone,

but with each step, her pulse speeds up. She reaches the top of the platform and stairs defiantly into the executioner's eyes. He pushes her forward and forces her head onto the chopping block. She catches one last glimpse of the blade dangling overhead. She can't believe it's come to this. When she first came from Austria and was introduced as a future queen of France, people cheered her in the streets.

They saw her as a force of change. What did she do to make them turn against her so dramatically? How could they swing so violently from love to hate? She still can't fully understand it. When in collars closed around her neck and her thoughts swirl, was there something she could have done differently? Could she have listened more,

fought harder? Maybe people would have loved her if she'd acted like someone else. Someone less foreign, less independent, less Marie Antoinette-like. Or maybe not. Maybe because she was a strong woman in a world run by men, she was always doomed to a faith like this.