Bad Dates with Jameela Jamil - The Sarah Paulson Corner (w/ Ali Kolbert, Brooks Wheelan, and Jared Goldstein)

Episode Date: December 16, 2024

On a new episode of Bad Dates, host Joel Kim Booster welcomes comedians Ali Kolbert, Brooks Wheelan, and Jared Goldstein to discuss their most iconic dating fiascos. Ali is well aware that this is unhinged behavior, but she just had to be sure, Brooks can overlook the scabies, but can the scabies overlook Brooks, and Jared is at the wrong party looking for the wrong kind of good time.If you’ve had a bad date you’d like to tell us about, our number is 984-265-3283, and our email is [e-mail], we can’t wait to hear all about it! Subscribe to our YouTube Channel for video clips.Joel Kim Booster: Psychosexual, Fire Island, Loot Season 2Ali Kolbert: @alikolbert on socials, AliKolbert.com for tour datesBrooks Wheelan: New special Alive In Alaska on YouTubeJared Goldstein: @heyjaredhey on socials, Sorry, What? podcast Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Bad Dates ad-free. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Men and women, which one's North Korea, which one's Russia? That's hard. I would probably say that Russia's men because it's sort of this like... Horses. Ego, big dick thing, whereas... Shirtless on a horse. North Korea is sort of just like a quiet evil. Ooh.

Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to another episode of Bad Dates. I am Joel Kimbooster, your host as always. You don't know this, but I haven't recorded an episode. episode of this podcast in a few weeks now because I've been working on something else. And I'm back, finally. You guys won't know that at all, but you might notice an emotional spiritual change in me. But other than that, it's all the same. It's all the same. The podcast is the same. It's still a podcast about bad dates. Your bad dates and my funny friend bad dates and some new friends, bad dates. You know, we have a good mix on the pod today. I'm excited about it. But before we get to

them. I want to read, um, some listener mail. We always start with a story and or piece of advice. This is, there's a little bit of both to this. And, uh, let's just get into it. This is from Eleanor. Bad Dates. Hi, Bad Dates. I was on a first date with a woman who all called, uh, Tea. Love that. Um, that is like such a classic lesbian name, too, I, I find. Um, we met for brunch with a few of her friends. I was excited about her and didn't mind the group thing. I knew that was a situation. Everyone was nice enough and I was having a good time, but definitely picked up some vibes between Teia and her friend, L.B. I was seated next to Teia and L.B. And L.B. was on her other side.

There was just enough leaning on each other and lingering glances. I don't know why it bothered me so much, but they made a super big deal about tasting each other's food. They were like feeding each other and making what I found to be over-the-top moaning noises. Sure, it was a good place, but it felt like a red flag to me or maybe just yellow. Anyway, rest of the brunch was uneventful, fun even, and Taya and I got to break off and spend the rest of the afternoon together. Long story short, we hook up and I discovered a Liz Beth tattoo right below Taya's left hip bone. It's pretty cute, but I'm assuming L.B. is Liz Beth. And the vibes now start to make sense.

I'm going to see where things go with Taya and try not to get in my head about LB, like going to assume she was talking about me when she called out L in bed. I don't want to fuck this up. What are the other red flags I should look out for? Well, Eleanor, I got to tell you. This is like some gothic lesbian drama that you have just involved yourself in. And I would run for the hills, quite frankly, because the last thing you want to involve yourself in is the psychosexual relationship that this woman has with L.B. Because that's what it is. I don't know what the past is, if they officially dated, if they're just friends who are in love but refuse to accept it.

what has happened but if they have not fucked they are supplicating fucking by feeding each other at brunch and moaning that's what's going on there and it's going on in front of your eyes they have so little respect for you

you were a pawn in their game and get out of it yeah I think that's not a yellow flag I think that's a big old red flag and again I tell you like do you want to be the third lesbian and Carol do you want to be Sarah Paulson I mean like sure

Sarah Paulson is pretty great, but I wouldn't want to be Sarah Paulson and Carol. And that's who you're sort of, you're painting yourself into the Sarah Paulson corner. And I don't recommend that for you. But I'm not the only one who's here to give advice. I don't know if we have a lesbian on the panel today, but we have, you know, some people who are adjacent, hopefully to your experience and who might be able to give some better advice than I am. We're going to start with the person that I think I've known the longest on the church. chat today. You know him from SNL. Things of that nature. He's a comedian, actor, writer. I've known him so long. I don't even care to get his credits right. I think you should leave SNL. And he has an

upcoming special Alive in Alaska. It's Brooks. We win everybody. Hi, Brooks. Joel, were you at the Detective Pikachu night? Yes. Was that you? Yes. Okay, that's the last time we really hung out. Me and Nicole Byer had this terrible idea where we would get drunk at a movie every week. It lasted one time. We both blacked out at Detective Pikachu. Rita or a vehicle. Rita or a vehicle, Detective Pikachu. I'm going to go in order of the person that I know now the second longest, which is my good friend.

He's a comedian and actor from shows like SNL and Modern Family. Wait, Jared, you were on SNL? I was in a sketch when I was a kid. but I guess that counts. That's probably as much as I was in it. That counts. Yeah. We were in pretty equal amounts of Saturday now.

Yeah. It's Jared Goldstein, everybody. Welcome. Hello. My newest friend on the screen in front of me right now. Oh, my God. I'm getting news right now in my ear. She is a lesbian.

Oh, my God. She's a comedian and a writer who has appeared on The Tonight Show. I'm so glad. that I chose this letter and that we have her here to weigh in. The expert, Ali Colbert, everybody. Hi. Thank you for having me.

We need your opinion, your POV on the situation. Yeah, I actually like read that as like so like girls that do that and then say they're not gay is like so straight to me. Like straight girls are always like pushing the boundaries of like what would be a normal platonic relationship. They're like, we cuddle. We sleep like that together. We just like hook up, but it's like we're friends and our boyfriends are friends.

And I'm just like, that is how I experience straight women all the time. But wait, I think they're both. Like having a tattoo of your friend's name on your like lower back and then being like. Well, we don't know for sure if LB. Lizabeth is a lesbian or a straight girl. We, we know for sure that Taya and the writer are, but we don't know if Lizabeth is. I assume that Lisbeth was also a lesbian, but maybe I was wrong. I mean, yeah, I'm hominolative, so I did assume that she was a lesbian.

I mean, it just sounds kind of straight to me. Like, but I guess there's a lot of- Maybe L-B stands for lesbian. Yeah, it could be. Bad dates. Dates. Allie, we're going to start with you and your date. I actually don't know the details of her story.

So it might be, I don't know the gender of the person that she, her bad date story is about. But we're about to find out and I can't wait. So, Ali, take it away. So of course my bad date story is with a man. I went to NYU. My friends were dating Jewish guys from Long Island. And I was really like only looking for like a hot guy at first. I was just like I don't really care what he believes in or where he's from or what he does.

I just wanted to be hot. And I was blowing up in my face. Honestly, I was like, okay, let me find a, this is such a weird Freudian story. But I was like, let me find a guy like my dad. I was like, I just want to meet a six-foot-tall Jewish guy who, like, has a job in finance, like, that he is, like, the only guy that, like, I know that, like, I respect. Wow. I guess I could. You should date my dad.

The description, the description you just gave, I could smell the sparries. You know that sparries smell. Yeah, it's like that, like, wet rubber. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I could, just the description, that's what the sense memory brought up. But. So I was 17. and I matched with this guy on an app.

I mean, maybe it was an app. I think, like, Hinge was, like, just invented. And I think Hinge, like, when we started using it, maybe I'm misremembering this, but, like, wasn't it, like, wasn't the conceit, like, you have mutual friends on him? Yes, yes, yes. It's, like, people in your network. Yeah, so I matched with this guy, and he was, this is so Freudian,

so you're going to have to forgive it. But he was, like, from my dad's hometown. And I was, like, okay, like, he's probably the one. and I remember we he was like Where should we go on our first date? And I purposefully chose full on fantasy addiction At this point in time. I purposefully chose Colliente Cab Company

because it's where my mom and my dad had their first date. Oh my God. Oh my God. This is a crazy fucking 17 year old Bia. Did you wear a wedding dress to the date? And of course this is psychotic. And I just want to give you another lens

to read this through. And that lens is just, sheer desperation. This is the final, I'm hanging on to my heterosexuality by a fucking thread. And if this doesn't work, I'm gonna have to be a dyke.

And there's really no worse fate imaginable for me at that point. I went to dinner with this guy. He was totally fine. I obviously felt nothing inside. And then, but I was like, eh, keep going. And I was like, go on a few more dates with him. I went on a few more dates with him.

And I got to the point where I was like, I'm gonna need to, have sex with this guy in order to see how I like feel about this, but really probably in order to like keep him around anymore. Like we just passed the point where I thought like he would still like keep seeing me if I didn't sleep with him. Which, um, kind of playing chicken a little bit. Women have all the time. Yeah. And I remember I was in my dorm room. I was living in the dorms at the time. And he texted me at like, I don't know, like 10 o'clock asking what I was doing. And I was like, I think I'm going to go over.

Like I was in my bed, like, you know, pajamas on, teeth brushed, makeup off. I think I had like a retainer in. And I was like, I'm going to get out of bed. I'm going to like get totally ready. Pretend I was just coming from like a bar or something and go to his apartment. And I'm just going to do it. Like we just need to sleep together. And I go to his apartment.

And of course, like, you know, men's apartments, especially at this point in time, are just horrifying. There's just the bathroom. It's like no one has lived there. There's just like, there's no, you know, there's no soap in the bat, whatever, it's disgusting. It's bad, one towel, a million Gatorade bottles. Empty Gatorade bottles, empty shampoo bottles in the shower. You cannot find a paper towel anywhere. What is going on?

I go into his room, we're hooking up. And I'm like, okay, it's happening. Like, we're going to have sex. I remember he takes out his dick. He does enter me. and I realize in that moment that I don't want to have sex with him. And I'm like, hey. It's so often in that moment.

Yeah. You know, I was just like, you know, I actually, I'm like, and I'm thinking to myself, and I think these are mental gymnastics that women have to do a lot. I'm like, do I suffer through? Not to, I don't know about men because I'm only speaking to my experience. But like, do I want to suffer through this like 15 minutes of like awful sex? Or do I want to just stoke? the like awkward 90 seconds of me being like, hey, I actually don't want to do this.

Sorry, I came over and leave. And I'm like, I'm going to do it. I am sure he's going to be really fucking confused. And I was like, you know what? I actually like really don't want to be here right now. And I know I came over and I thought that was what I wanted. But now that I'm here, I don't want the look on this man's face. He literally put his dick in me and I was like, I have to leave.

that honestly, Ali, that's really kind of, like, I don't want to give you the like fucking Purple Heart or anything, but that's really brave, I think, to do, especially at like, what you were, you said you were like 17. Yeah. Like, to have the wherewithal to know that I'm 36 years old and I cannot tell you, like, how many people I have gone all the way to the point of ejaculation with that I truly do not want to be having sex with because I don't want to have that conversation. Isn't that insane?

Yes. No, it is insane though. It is insane. Yeah, and I was like, okay, and he was like, you're kidding me. He was like, you're for real? And I was like, he thought I was joking. And I was like, no, I just like, I really don't want to leave. What a great bit that would be, by the way.

First time having sex being like, I think we, I don't think we do this. Clarious. And I got up and I left and he was really confused. He was so thrown. And that guy is, Joel, he's on the next episode, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll hear his side next. He's like, I went, this girl came over.

I'm so fucking convenient. He sent me as I was leaving. He drew a graph, like of an arrow going down and sent it to me and was like, this is how my night went. Oh. And I still, like, I do think that is a, you know, I'll call it a terrible date, but I also think it's a bit of a badge of honor. Years later, though, my friend started dating this guy and she was really excited to introduce me to him. and she told me his name and it was my guy.

And I was like, oh my God, like I have to tell you, you know, I know that guy. And I was like, I went on a few dates with him, but I didn't tell her the whole story. And then she said she went back to him and said, you know,

Ali Culberts, my friend, and his face went white. And like, he was like, you have to ask her what happened. And I'm sure, and then he broke up with her. And I'm sure he was like, I'm sure this experience haunts him

that like some, at some point in his 20s, he like took his dick out. And I felt it and was like, I have to leave your apartment. Yeah, I guess I'm feeling from my perspective, like, that must have been, he must have, you may have given him dick, like, problems, like, relationship, like, to his penis problems for years. Because what you should have said is I don't want to do this because I am a lesbian in that moment. That is, I think. That's true.

But I just, I don't even know that. I'm kidding. That's not true. You don't owe him anything. You don't owe him anything. Bad dates. Now we have to move on into our next story, which is coming from Brooks, Weeland. Brooks.

Now, I know I've known a couple of the ladies in your life. And they've all been nice and seemingly normal. So I'm wondering, where in your life are we for your bad date? Well, I was 25 right after I got out of a seven-year relationship. met this babe, an Echo Park. She had at a liquor store, she had cool pants on and a shaved head. And that was the opposite of my old girlfriend from Iowa, which is where I'm from. And I was like, yo, sick pants.

And then we made out, like, in the parking lot, like right away. It was very cool. Yeah. I was like, this chick's crazy. She's so cool. Turns out she had a shaved head because she had had lice before. Huh. Yeah, it was like, yeah.

Of all the reasons, probably the worst. Do you have to shave your head for lice? Yeah. Yeah, you got to get rid of that. I thought that you know, you 1,000% do not have to shave. 100% you know. She told me she did guys.

That wouldn't be news. She had that's crazy. What year was this? What year was this that the technology was not there? Look, it was just a buzz cut. It was sick. She had super long weird dreads before that. So yeah, there's a good reason to shave her head.

She was getting rid of her dread. Thank God for the lice. Yeah. You're not. I'm painting a particularly clean picture of this girl, by the way. The dreads and the lice together. She was so cool. She didn't have, anyway.

And just the opposite of the girl I'd been dating forever. So this girl's really rad. She was like an heiress to this company. Like she was a trustifarian. I found out what that means, like a trust fund hippie kid. Wait, can you say it and we'll bleep it? What the company is? No.

Amazon. I'll tell you off here. Okay. But it's crazy. It's everywhere. And I see it. And I'm like, that psycho. But like, this is me.

Look, this isn't her fault at all. I was just so enamored with this girl. And like, on like day three, she was like, yeah, our house in Hawaii. She also talked like that. And I was like, you have a house in Hawaii? She's like, let's go. And I was like, okay. And we flew to Hawaii for like date, I don't know, like the fifth day.

And we knew each other. Wait, I'm so sorry. I have to stop you one last time. And I promise we will let. this go. This girl is an heiress and she does not have access to medicine to get rid of her lice. She had to shave her head. I don't get it. She's rich. They have access probably to technology that we, lice technology that we don't have access to. She looked cool. All right. It was a solid. I'll let it go. I'll let it go. I'll let it go. You're on a plane. Keep gone. We go to Hawaii.

We get there. Did you fly private? No. No. She didn't have like, all the money. I mean, I still, I think I paid for our flight or something. Anyway, I don't know.

I don't know what happened. We get there, though. It's the person I'm dealing with like a real... Sounds like you met a homeless woman and she was an heiress. You're like,

she was an heiress and she was in a park with a shaved head and I paid to bring her to Hawaii. And I can't... Yeah. I appreciate it. I was a house person from Echo Park on vacation. Wow. It's solid. Yeah.

We go to Hawaii. We break it. We have to, We do. You know what? You might have your work because we had to break into the house. Wait, don't tell me you broke into the house. Oh my God.

Oh my God. She's homeless. Cops come. She talks and down. It was her family. She had to like get her fucking grandpa on the phone. But then we rented a moped. We ran mopads.

We drove them all around Maui. It's a fucking big island. I had no idea how big that island was. But then on the ride, she had this fanny pack. And she opened it and she had Coke, weed, and Molly. And she was like, what do you want to? what do you want to do? I go, you flew with that?

Like, I hadn't, and I didn't know, like, babes just fly with that. Like, I had no idea. I'm, like, 25 at the time. And it was just, I was, you know, still, like, new from Iowa. And I was like, oh, my gosh. And then we did, you know, all of those and, like, snorkeled. And I was like, I love this chick. I love her.

Also, she had scabies this whole time. Oh, my God. I loved, I loved every part of this. Aren't scabies, like, Aren't they mites that go on your skin? Yeah. You have to put an entire cream all over your body, all over your body down to the bottom of your feet.

There's no cure. I just have to peel off my skin. No, it was crazy. I was once wrongly diagnosed with scabies. So I had to do the cream. Yeah, I had carpet beetles. I once thought I was becoming schizophrenic, and it was scabies.

So, you know. Your fingers itch so bad. The webings of your fingers it's so bad. And I know that because when we got, back from Hawaii, which I'm now completely in love with this chick. She told me we have different spirits and we can't see each other anymore. And I was like, what? And then I had scabies, but so I was so itchy and so sad.

And it was like the worst dating experience I ever had. She gave you scabies? Oh, yeah. Because she had scabies, but I'm like, I don't care. I'm still going to cuddle. You can't see him, you know? Oh, you knew she had scabies and you were just like cool. She was doing the creams.

Yeah, she was doing the creams. and then I had to do the creams, but I didn't have anybody to freaking cuddle with. It was terrible. Anyway, shout out to her. She rocks. I have no ill will at all. It was just a psycho situation.

Do you know where she is today? I do, yeah. Yeah, I looked her up not that long ago. How she's doing? Yeah. She got a lot of face tattoos now. Oh, my God. She sells incense in Asheville, North Carolina.

That sounds like an heiress to Verizon if I ever heard of it. Do you fact check the heiressness? Yeah. Her family sues each other a lot and they're in the news a lot over who gets what money. And like, it was what was the what's the Oxycontin family? Oh, I mean, the Kardashians. Not quite. She's a sackler.

Not quite, but like their family didn't make money off of a good thing. She's probably like a Johnson and Johnson heiress. Yeah, maybe a Walton. A Walton? No. Anyway, I will, I just, I'll tell you guys, and it's like not that important. It is, it's just these stores are everywhere, and I'm always just like, that psycho. That's her business.

It's crazy. Anyway, but it was just me. She's the heirs to the Zumi's fortune. Absolutely, yes. The Mathnasium people. No, it was just like, I was just like, Tully fell in love of this girl when I was 25, And then she's like, we can never talk again. I was like, what?

And, you know, shout out to her for, you know, teaching me a solid lesson. And what is that lesson, Brooks? I don't know. What would you say you took away from that experience that you applied to the rest of your dating life? I really think I've been chasing that love that I've felt that week ever since then. Oh, my God. Like, every girl I've dated, I'm like, do you have to be crazy, right? Are you crazy?

What was the lesson again? The lesson is, I don't have a lesson. If she listens, I love you, and I will take you back. Bad dates. Dates. We have Jared Goldstein here last, but certainly, of course, not least. And you have, we're doing something a little special with you, Jared, because you have a little amuse-bush to begin,

and then we'll get into your main longer story. But what is the short story? Okay, the first one, I have twice now accidentally fallen asleep and missed a date entirely. Oh, wow. Fair. That's not crazy. I mean, for me, it feels crazy because I'm not a napper. I almost never do that.

And that's like pretty much like the two times I've napped. It was during when I was supposed to be on a date with somebody. And then you wake up to like the whole like every message, hey, I'm here. Are you close? Are you okay? Should I leave? I think I'm going to leave. It's really bad.

I will say, my fiancee is a big napper. the naps all the time. And my, and Mitri Jihari, who I used to host a podcast with and was at the ground floor of us dating, said at our wedding, she's going to play a slideshow of every time I texted her thinking that he was ghosting me or that he was over it and that he was going to break up with me. And then it just turned out that he was napping instead. Because there were a lot of those moments throughout the beginning portions of our dating. Now, Jared, you did reveal to our producers that one of the naps,

quote unquote, was from day drinking, which can you call that a nap or do you call it passed out? Passing out. That actually leads me very well into my entree, which is also in a way related. But, yeah, you know, I had a fun day, okay? Okay, so my little bit longer story, when I was in college and my new favorite drink is alcohol, I went on a date with a guy who was sober, but I didn't know that. He didn't tell me. So I sort of inadvertently spent the whole date, like, trying to make him relapse.

We're, like, at a bar. I'm like, I'm getting a drink. You want one? He's like, oh, no, thanks. We go to dinner. I'm having drinks at dinner. We go to, he brings you to, like, a house party. And I'm like, oh, great, there'll be beer at the very least at this house party.

And I'm in the kitchen I can't find any. I'm in a living room I can't find any. I'm going through every room just trying to find something to drink. And then I bump into him in the living room. And I was like, hey, where is the alcohol? Like, where is anything to drink at this party? And he goes, I'm an alcoholic and everyone here is sober. And I was like, this is on him.

Yeah, that's a communication issue. Like, yeah. We were both young. I think he was newly sober. I think he was like 24. I was like, 20. You got to be like, sober party. But the thing is, I can't just be like, I know.

I know a lot. I'm 36 and so I'm getting into the age where everyone is getting married and getting sober. And I will say that almost every freshly sober person I know, it's the first thing they talk about, like, in a party situation, especially. Like, they are learning to protect themselves. Like, you're so right. Everybody, like, I'm, I'm not drinking right now. And like, because we have to stop. We drink so much for a decade. You have to stop. We got paid in beer for like almost a decade. Yeah. Like you can't. Yeah, you can't keep it up. But yeah, so I just, I didn't know. I didn't know. And I'm just fully like at this house, at this sober house party, just asking everyone where I can find alcohol.

But it wasn't a great date in the first place. It's just normal behavior when you go to a party, though, by the way. Was this a nighttime party or daytime party? It was a nighttime party. Wow. And what was, was it just a stand around and talk party? or was there like games? Was there some sort of...

It was scared out of talk, but there also was like there were colored lights, there was music. Yeah, I guess so sober people deserve to do that too, I guess, but I guess for me,

like, my thing is... Let me know. When I'm, like, when I do sober activities, I, like, I do them frequently. I'm not fucked up all the time. I just, like, it's not,

it needs to be like, I don't know, like, dancing and standing around, like, talking maybe, but like, the music and stuff, like, There needs to be an additive for that to be interesting to me.

You know, otherwise I need like a game night. I need a movie. Yeah. I need some sort of like organized activity if I'm not having something to make it more fun. You know, like I. Yeah. All my sober dates are dinner, walks, riding bikes. Like I can't just fucking sit there.

Yeah. Send me to an escape room. Let's go. Yeah. Oh, yes. Exactly. Play a game, card game. Let's get busy.

Although I did. I did do an escape room recently where a minotar chases you and if it catches you, you are captured. I did not realize that you were supposed to be captured. I was put in jail and I did a bump of ketamine because I was like, well, this is boring. I'm going to just wait until my friends finish the escape room

so I might as well just do some ketamine. And then it was a part of it, though. They came and rescued me and I was so weird when they found me that they were convinced I was a mole of some sort. Like I had been turned and was then helping the Minotaur, which was a really fun layer to add on top of the escape room, I have to say. It's great.

I've never comboed drugs in escape room. I think that's the only way to do it. I highly recommend. No, it's great. My favorite thing to do is go to escape rooms with a bunch of gay guys, because all of the little preamble setups that they give, you to, for the story, make it so much funnier when it's a group of just gay guys. Like, for this one particularly, like, we were all had blindfolds on. And the tour guide that we were

on a tour with is calling her boss in a panic because us, the tour, got bored of the historical sites that she was showing us and saw a military base off in the distance and decided to go and check out the military base instead. And I was like, that is such gay guy behavior. Literally. Of course we got bored on the historical sites and we wanted to go to the abandoned military base. We're gay. So, highly recommend.

Wow, that sounds like a whole immersive world. Yeah, it really was. It's here in L.A. You can look at up the Minotaur escape room. It's really, really fun. I definitely recommend. But I guess I just spoil that someone will get captured and you can have an opportunity to rescue them.

So don't do drugs. Well, you let everybody know, don't do ketamine when you're in, in the, when you're alone for four minutes, you're like, I got to do ketamine? Yeah. Okay, so Jared, back to you. What is the lesson, the headline you would say that you learn maybe in tandem from both of these dates, if you can call the first one a date or just one from the second one? I guess the first one, just set an alarm.

You know, if you're laying down, if it's five o'clock and you're laying down, just it can't hurt. set an alarm. And then the second one, I didn't learn a damn thing. No one can learn. What I learned was that that guy was sober. Okay. We could have told me an hour and a half ago.

And I would have behaved very differently. When you turn 36 or 37 and you have to get sober because that's what happens if you're a comic. Yeah. When you go on dates, you've got to know like, hey, I'm sober. And that's it. Yeah. And to be fair, he did say on the date early on. I was 20.

He was like 24, I think. He goes, you know, most people are on my level. around their 30s. So it was kind of over at that point. I was like, oh, maybe we're not the right match here. Yeah. Meaning they had been road hard and put away wet at that point. Bad dates.

Brooks, where can people find you? What are you doing these days? I have a special coming out October 30th. You can buy it, but November 11th, that's just for free on YouTube called Alive in Alaska. I went to Alaska for two weeks, shot a special, and it was one of the worst ideas I've ever had. So can't wait, can't wait to see it.

Jared, where can people find you and what are you doing these days? You can find me on social media at Hey, Jared. Hey, I've got a podcast. It's called the Sorry What Podcast. Tune in every Tuesday. Cute. And Allie, where can people find you? And what are you doing these days?

I am at Allie Colbert everywhere. I have tons of road dates up on my website. Check it out. Come on a show. Follow. Amazing. This has been an incredible, an incredible. incredible episode. I had so much fun. This has been bad dates. If you guys like the show,

please rate and review it. Give us five stars. It helps people find the show. Even if you, as someone I checked recently hates me, hates me as the host, thinks I'm really quote unquote dropping the ball, but still gave us five stars. So I appreciate that. Even if you have negative things to say about me or the pod, still give us five stars. That's really helpful. I appreciate that. Thank you. And listen, if you're looking for the perfect gift this holiday season, we have all new types of Bad Dates merch, like hats, stickers, t-shirts, t-shirts, hoodies, and more. You won't want to miss these.

You can find it all at SiriusXMstore.com slash bad dates. It's all really cute stuff, you guys. Until next week, I'm Joel Gimbooster, and this is Bad Dates. Bye-bye. Bad Dates is a production of smartless media, created by Robert Cohen. Executive producers are Robert Cohen and Stuart Bailey,

produced, edited, and engineered by Devon Tori Bryant. Produced by Ann Harris. Edited by Kyle McGrough. Associate producer is Maddie McCann. And social media producer is Tommy Galgana. Executive producers are Sean Hayes, Will Arnett, and Jason Bateman. Executive producers for smartless media are Richard Corson and Bernie Komensky. Music by Cushie and Evan Schleder.

If you've had a bad date or would like our advice on any dating issues, please tell us about it at baddatespod at gmail.com or call us at 984-265-3-283. That's 984-265-3-283. That's all for this week. We will be back for more. Bad Gates.