Bad Friends - Barbie & Ken Breakup

Episode Date: October 23, 2023

Tour Tickets: https://badfriendspod.com Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Morgan&Morgan, ButcherBox, Shopify & Vroom • Morgan & Morg...an: If you’re ever injured, you can check out Morgan & Morgan. Their fee is free unless they win. For more information go to https://ForThePeople.com/badfriends or dial Pound LAW (Pound 529) from your cell phone. This is a paid advertisement. • Sign up today using code BADFRIENDS to receive free turkey + 20 dollars off your first order at https://butcherbox.com/BADFRIENDS • Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month tiral period at https://www.shopify.com/badfriends • You can buy a car from Vroom entirely online. So, next time you need to buy a car, just grab your phone, go to https://Vroom.com, and check out thousands of cars. YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Barbie & Ken's Evil Spirits 7:44 Carlos Misbehaves at Santino's Party 13:10 A Barbie Girl in a Barbie World 19:20 Bobby's Spiritual Awakening 26:06 Does Everything Happen for a Reason? 33:15 Bobby Lee is a Dodo 39:13 Carlos Wants to a Taxidermy Bobby 46:33 Santino's Advice for Trick-Or-Treaters   59:49 A Fancy Jigsaw Shocks Bobby More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbyleelive.com More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger:  https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino  Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Juicy Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/?hl=en More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@SOSVHS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/   Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod   Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom  Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.net/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This episode contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, we are in trouble. We have what this is our last leg. This is it, baby for 2023. Important leg. Important leg. It's your favorite leg. Denver, Colorado. This weekend, we're in Denver at the Bell Co. Theater. Denver come out and see us. Then we go to Milwaukee. Milwaukee. Then we go to my hometown Chicago, Illinois. That many apples and we're to get them. I'm a lesson. Then we end in Madison, Wisconsin. Guys, what you guys are with the best dates left. That's it. That's all we've got.
Starting point is 00:00:25 Check it out. Check it out. Denver, Milwaukee, Chicago, Minneapolis, and Madison. Go to bedfriendspod.com. Badfriendspod.com. Come on Barbie. Let's go party. Uh, uh, uh, uh, I've never seen.
Starting point is 00:00:37 You've seen Barbie. I've never seen Barbie. I don't even know how they talk. They're telling this. Well, I'm Ken and that's my girl Barbie. Hi, and I'm Barbie. That's not how she talks. How do you talk?
Starting point is 00:00:49 I'm Barbie. No, that's not how she talks. That's how she talks. Yeah, all right. Trans Barbie. What did you just say? Stop. Stop.
Starting point is 00:00:59 They're all trans. I've seen the dolls. That's right, they are, they are. Okay, guys, we have a weird thing happening on the TV Well, first of all, can we wish everybody a happy? Hello, what's going on right are you go right into bits happy? Hello, hello, and we have a shot over These two idiots
Starting point is 00:01:21 You two are disgusting Something bad friends I'm Agedin. You two are disgusting. Are you two or something? We're bad friends. Tt-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t Come on Barbie, let's go party. It hurts. Does that how it sounds? So anyway, welcome to Halloween. Halloween Halloween. Halloween.
Starting point is 00:01:59 And be careful because you can indirectly summon evil spirits during the holidays. Halloween and you know, you're inviting the demon to come into your lives to be careful. I agree. I agree. I agree to that. I'll ghost this morning in my house and I'm actually not. Tell me about your ghost.
Starting point is 00:02:18 I'm not joking. Describe it to me, the ghost. So I was looking up, we were cooking breakfast this morning and I looked up in the hallway. There's a little hallway that goes into my living room and then into another hallway. And my dog will often sit and stare at that hallway. And she sits and stares at it all the way.
Starting point is 00:02:31 By the way, your dog. Yeah. The best black dog I've ever seen. Yeah, I know. We got rid of the white one. Wasn't good enough. Yeah, I mean, that dog was doing slam dunks. Yep.
Starting point is 00:02:42 Did you hear her rap? It was like jiggling. Yeah. Have you hear the rap. It was like jiggling. Yeah. Have you met the dog? It was like, if you put down it like cardboard box, flat, it starts break, it's the best. It's the best black dog. Yeah, anyway, go ahead.
Starting point is 00:02:55 No, but my dog will sit there, right? And she'll stare at the hallway, creeped out. All the time. All the time, so that's- And then this morning, I looked up from eggs and looked back down and a vision went by. And let me describe it to you. Please, please, let me close my eyes.
Starting point is 00:03:11 All, Lanky, long, shitty, wispy hair. It sounds like okay. Okay. And it's awkward and it kind of hunches when it walks. So it has a very forward hunch. Almost like... It was Arish of here. Oh yeah, it was there. Yeah, he was like, he just slept over. Oh, I see.
Starting point is 00:03:31 Yeah, he was just going to get there. Cause the hunch, and the way you, okay. Exactly, he slept over. No, but no demon, go back to the demon. Good demon, demon. Long, like one of the tree people. You know the tree people that have long, like daddy long legs, like?
Starting point is 00:03:42 Lord of the Rings, tree people. Yeah, the tree people. Long. I have no idea what those people look like. Oh, you never tree people. Yeah, the tree people. Long. Honestly. I have no idea what those people look like. Oh, you never saw it. I know, I don't know. Fuck it.
Starting point is 00:03:49 I don't care. So anyways, long. What is the Slenderman? Slenderman. Yeah, Slenderman. No, Slenderman is a Jewish demon. Yeah, Slenderman. The Jewish demon.
Starting point is 00:03:58 Slenderman. Slenderman. Those two different. Slenderman. And Slenderman is my accountant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's your business man. So my accountant was at your, yeah, he was there. Oh, I see. And he kept walking to the house and he goes, you have to do your text. Oh. So he's always
Starting point is 00:04:12 at my house doing that shit. Yeah. Yeah. So I saw the, I saw a vision of the body going through the hallway and I got goose. Do you call him goose pimples or goose bumps? You say bumps, bumps. What do you say? Um, what, I don't, I've never gotten them. You've never gotten goose bumps before? Never. Our, our skin doesn't do it. Asian skin doesn't, goose bumps. No, we don't do shark, we don't do.
Starting point is 00:04:33 You duck, you guys duck bump. We don't have awakenings. You guys duck bump. We goose bump, you duck bump. Yeah, no, I, I do, I get fucking goose bumps as big as coconut balls. What is a coconut balls? You mean a coconut? I just woke up so, you know, when I just woke up, I don't know what I'm saying. Coconut balls. What is coconut balls? You mean a coconut?
Starting point is 00:04:46 I just woke up so you know, when I just woke up, I don't know what I'm saying. Yeah, I get goosebumps because coconut, coconut. Coconut. Pfft. No, but I get them. I mean, what's the lesson about a goose bump? What's the last time you got a goose bump?
Starting point is 00:04:59 People cheer. Yeah, dude, I'm getting it right now. Yeah, that worked. Coconut balls. Whoa, yeah, or when I'm getting it right now. Yeah, that worked. Coconut balls. Whoa, yeah. Or when I have a spiritual awakening. Give me one. Did you have one recently? I went on a spiritual awakening in many, many years,
Starting point is 00:05:15 but you know, I had one when I was the bigger, well, let's talk about later, but I never really shared it, but I had the craziest where I went. This is where I went. There is no coincidences at all. And this is the Lord's work. This is the Lord's work.
Starting point is 00:05:31 And I can share it, but anyway, can you tell me to go back to the thing? I'd rather you share it. You're deep in the middle of the world. You're talking about a demon, you're fucking house. Let's go there. Okay. All right, so more slenderman was in the house.
Starting point is 00:05:43 More slenderman walking through the house. Yeah. Filthy flowerman was in the house. More slenderman walking through the house. Yeah. Filt the flow as he hated the house. It was dirty, it was, we didn't clean. But I immediately got this feeling in the pit of my stomach that someone had died in the house. So I texted my real estate agent and I said, did anybody ever pass away in this home?
Starting point is 00:06:00 He blocked my number. Whoa. So what that means to me is he killed someone in the house while he was selling it. What I think was, this is my, my brain. He was showing the house, someone was criticizing it. You know when you go through a house, you're like, I don't like the fixtures.
Starting point is 00:06:15 His door seems a little, he couldn't do it anymore. Well, I was at your house last night. Do you remember? It jerking off. He was jerking off. Yeah, he was jerking the guy off. He goes, by this house. Oh no. Yeah, we had a little miniking off. He was jerking the guy off. He goes, buy this house. Oh no.
Starting point is 00:06:26 Yeah, we had a little mini get together. It was a great get together. I ran into people that I hadn't seen the long time decrease. The Christ, yeah. And then dude. And this is, I'm kind of mad at you. Why?
Starting point is 00:06:36 In fact, I'm furious. What did I do? Because you know that kid Matt. Yeah. He did Fairfax. Yeah. You know him, right? Yeah, he did Fairfax. Yeah. You know him, right? Yes, yeah, he's a good friend.
Starting point is 00:06:46 So check it out, dude. Last time I was like, he goes, yeah, and I offered you that thing. He did, yeah. On Fairfax. He offered you a role in an animated Fairfax. And I go, wait, it's you, yeah, Matt. Cause I know of known Matt,
Starting point is 00:06:59 but when you called me and said, do Fairfax, you never said it was him. I'm sure I did. No, you didn't. You just gave me what the money was and I was like, no. Well, that's rightfax, you never said it was him. I'm sure I did. No, you didn't. You just gave me what the money was and I was like, no. Well, that's right. Yeah, you said no to the money. I don't know if he reached out though, I would have done it.
Starting point is 00:07:13 Here's what it sounded like, boy. It sounded like this. Hey, my buddy Matt is making this show called Fairfax. That's actually a cool show on Amazon. It's an animated show and it's offering you X amount of dollars. That's what I said. What you heard was, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah through. So you're a great party. Another thing I saw was, oh you had some... What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:07:48 You walk in, you go, okay this is Andrew Santino's private mini party. Elite only. No. Elite only, right? In my mind. Yeah, it should have been. I was driving up to your house, I was like, oh fuck, who's gonna be there?
Starting point is 00:08:01 Chris Pratt. Right, yeah. You know what I mean? It's some other guy. He was cleaning the pool. I was, yeah. Anyway, I walk You know what I mean? It's some other guy. He was cleaning the pool. I was, yeah. Anyway, I walk in and I'm like, oh, that's pretty good.
Starting point is 00:08:09 That's pretty good. That's pretty good. You know, some producers there. Yeah, some, yeah. Yeah, it's some high tech, right? But then you had mixed in with it borderline homeless. Yeah. Well, when you refer to that,
Starting point is 00:08:22 you're talking about, I'm like, oh, it's not fancy. Well, here about, yeah. Oh, it's not fancy. Well, here's the deal. Yeah, it's not elite. We needed someone to get ice, and I said, Oh, he goes, Dan, do you mind if I stop by? And I said, you can be there for 15 minutes.
Starting point is 00:08:35 Yeah. I said, drop off the ice 15 minutes, then you gotta go. But the worst person that showed up, by far, let me guess. Go ahead, one, two, three, Carlos, obviously. And here's what cars, Why, why what car why why and I'm gonna tell you I know you think I'm kidding around he tried to hook up with my wife twice hit on her two times drunk as fuck
Starting point is 00:08:50 Drop the multiple shit on the ground. I picked it up. I picked it up barely barely dude, and here's the funniest part late at night I'm not making anything up. I Got there's a bag of Tostitos chips Right yeah, I hear from the fucking other room. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Yeah, and hailum like a pig and he's spilling all over the floor. Yeah, and I go dude one at a time. Yeah, one at a time And he goes as a hyena pa. Yeah, right? So it's like the crunching Look at like this with your hand. Yeah So he's digging in there and he's crunching them and it was little and I was like buddy one chip at a time That's not go they're not going anywhere. Yeah, they're your chips and those chips say
Starting point is 00:09:44 What did you say? What was your response? I don't remember. I just was trying to get them all in at once. That's what you said. That's what I said. What are you doing? Also, if the chips were closer to the mouth,
Starting point is 00:09:55 they start whittling away because of his breath. Oh my God. They jump off. The chips are like, yeah, you know what I mean? They just, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm saying. Yeah, dude, it was, he was struggling. I'm sorry, yeah, you know what I mean? They just, no! No! You're insane. Yeah, dude. He was, he was showing.
Starting point is 00:10:08 I'm sorry. No, and then I'm, but you're a good guy, but you're a breath. Come on. And then on top of that. On top of that, so little patio, we have a nice little patio. Beautiful patio. Everyone's hanging out. I put out in the case that there might be bugs.
Starting point is 00:10:19 It's just little spindles with little thing you light it and it's for bug, you know, bug off, like little off-candle. And draw this way, this way. Time out, you shut your mouth. This fucking guy uses it as an ash tray. Dude, Bobby. Bobby. I, I, I, I, I,
Starting point is 00:10:37 I, you might as well just ask it in that baby's head. It was a baby there. Oh, no, no, it gets worse, hold on, hold on, let me get to that part. Now, only to use the off-candle thing as an asterisk, he's smoking, sharing cigarettes. Yeah, dude. Next to my buddy's pregnant wife. Yeah, dude. Lunatic. Lunatic. You're a lunatic. It was a joint. Yeah. Yeah. No, you smoke a cigarette. Then you guys smoke joints. Then you smoke more cigarettes. Next time, if you're gonna bring Mexicans, bring the darker skin one. That's right.
Starting point is 00:11:04 Because these lighter skin ones, they're arrogant. Well, you know, what do they think they're above it? And he didn't even help to clean up, which, you know, a darker skin, they would have done it. Yeah, they would have also built a gazebo and helped with the sense. Dude, rip in butts next to my buddy's pregnant wife.
Starting point is 00:11:18 And I mean, huffing down cigarettes, they took no breaks. It was chain smoking weed in cigarettes. How long, honestly, though, cause I left, I was there for an hour, maybe you're there for an hour and a half. How long and be honest was Carlos there for all night. One of the last ones to leave to midnight. Yeah midnight, third. Yeah. One of the last ones to leave. When did McCone leave? In my mind, he was never there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but his physical presence. Yeah, he was around
Starting point is 00:11:42 the same time. They left together because you know, These two are up to no good together all the time. Did most of the people stay a lot of people kick a lot of the people had to kick it And also, you know, those nice people that wanted to stay late to talk to the old lady was nice and what did we do by the way You want to talk about a dual Halloween birthday party? We served ramen for you That's true that I was wondering why there's so much ramen here for you. We had homemade ramen You get some homemade ramen. That was good. there's so much ramen here. For you, we had homemade ramen. Wow. Did you get some homemade ramen? That was good. It's really good.
Starting point is 00:12:07 You made home? We make the broth from scratch and then we get the fresh noodles from the market. Wow. Is it good? I mean, it was so good. You didn't have any? He already ate. No, no. And you know what he ate before that?
Starting point is 00:12:19 Ramen. I wanted to get it when he brought it. Well, if I knew that you were going to have ramen, I would have got the ramen. I just assumed you said I'm probably gonna go to dinner and I thought, well fine, here's an idea. Why was it friends? Anyway, my point is, okay, so back to the, oh, and then you said something,
Starting point is 00:12:30 and then you get you to the state, and then what else? You look good, Barbie. Okay, thank you. Honestly, when I see you, I realize why I'm in love with you. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, party. Do you know that song that I'm singing? No, but I don't want to know. But I don't want to know. Look it up.
Starting point is 00:12:47 Who do you who wrote who sung that? You don't know this song. I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world. Life is plastic. It's fantastic. Vote for Trump 2020. For to get him back. Is that the lyrics?
Starting point is 00:13:01 Yes. We should vote for Trump. And who sings it? Barbie. Aqua. Zoom into the lyrics? Yes. We should vote for a jump. And who sings it? Barbie. Aqua. Zoom into the lyrics and let me see if I can get this. Hiya, Barbie. Oh, is that the part of the lyrics?
Starting point is 00:13:13 I'm saying it to you, it's the beginning of the song. Hiya, Barbie. Oh, let's do this as a dialogue. Well, we're trying right now. Right, so you're trying to. All right, all right, so okay. Hiya, Barbie. Hi, Kim.
Starting point is 00:13:23 You wanna go for a ride? Sure, Kim. Jump in. I'm a to. All right, all right, all right, okay. Hiya, Barbie. Hi Kim. You wanna go for a ride? Sure Kim. Jump in. I'm a Barbie girl. Okay, listen to the beat. Oh, that houses to the dialogue still. No, that's the song. Uh, uh. Uh in plastic, if fantastic,
Starting point is 00:13:45 you can brush my hair, undress me anywhere, imagination, life is your creation. Very good, dude. That's very, very good. Okay. Come on, Barbie. Let's go party.
Starting point is 00:13:57 And then you have to go like this. Oh, oh, oh, yeah. Ready? Come on, Barbie. Let's go party. Whoa. Whoa. What? Whoa, whoa, whoa. What was that? That was a real orgasm, dude. Ready come on Barbie. Let's go party
Starting point is 00:14:09 What what what what was that that was a real orgasm, dude? Did you really just pop one? That's a real orgasm, dude when I do fucking orgasm singing dude. It's real it does see do it again Come on Barbie. Let's go party Is that what you sound like when you shoot? Yeah, dude, you don't like it? I do not. I do not, but I'm not the girl so it doesn't matter. What I do is I give them the little um, plug ear plugs. Oh, so they can't hear you. I put them in right when I'm about to come. Oh, I put them in. Do you know what Carlos said to me last night? No joke. Hey man, this area, this area that you live in has a ton of good prostitution spots. Oh my god. Did you say that? Are am I making that up or not? No, I did say it's the suburbs. What the fuck are you doing?
Starting point is 00:14:49 Oh, it's the yeah, it's the valley. Yeah, but but he literally goes this is a hotbed of prostitution spots Did you say that I did I did I did say that okay? So don't make it sound like you didn't know I was embarrassed of my words That's why you said it to the entire party. Well, I was just trying to tell you in some Everybody heard you were outside talking out like you literally go this is a hotbed a prostitution spots and i got to tell you i woke up and i'll know you don't remember what happened last no i remember a little bit and i was like oh no i'm calling you right now let me see how you react bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb Bob. Bob. I haven't picked up yet. I know I just like to talk. Oh. Bob. Hello. Bob. Carlos. Wait, what? Who is this? You don't have call already. It's me. No, Andrew. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:15:44 Carlos have my house last night. Trump. He sucked your house. What. Okay, Carlos left my house last night. Trump. He sucked your house? What? You said Carlos sucked your house last night? I gotta go. I know. Is that your cousin's girlfriend?
Starting point is 00:15:56 He doesn't have a girlfriend. Who is that girl though? Then she's a single girl. There's just girls that were there. There's people that were there. Yeah. She's pretty cute. Are you interested? No, but who is she?
Starting point is 00:16:06 You're interested who is she though? Well, I'm not telling you on air. Okay, but I mean are you interested? There was something about her eyes. I like the eyes too. What eyes were I like when women's eyes are close together. Yes This is interesting. I always get girls with cross eyes and close together. What do you mean? She doesn't have cross eyes They're like you know what she told me. Well, you mean? She doesn't have cross-eyes. You know what she told me? She's never been in a relationship in her whole life. God bless. She really? I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I- I'm like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like,
Starting point is 00:16:45 I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like,
Starting point is 00:16:53 I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like,
Starting point is 00:17:01 I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, Let me tell you guys, if you're ever in a car accident, who are you gonna call Morgan and Morgan? That's right, Morgan and Morgan, incredible. These guys, the largest, America's largest injury law firm, I got an accident in my own neighborhood. I got bummed out, didn't know who to call
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Starting point is 00:19:59 Subscribe today at publicmobile.ca. Different is calling. So a long time ago, when I was 17 years old, I got sober. Yeah. Well, that's it. What do you guys think? I'm coming. No, so I got sober and I was very active
Starting point is 00:20:15 in, you know, local San Diego recovery scene, right? I had a sponsor and, you know, and all that stuff, right? And so then after about five years, I fucking quit going to meetings, right? And I started doing stand up, because it filled my heart. Right? And then I just, it got to the point
Starting point is 00:20:33 where years went by and I didn't know anybody from the thing anymore. From what thing? Oh, from the recovery or anything. I didn't have a single number. I didn't know, but I hadn't been to a meeting many, many years. And then when I was 30,
Starting point is 00:20:44 when I had almost 13 years of sobriety, when did I relapse when I was on that TV? Yeah, that was the first time you relapsed. That was the first time, right? So, but that was an opiates run. That's bad. I had a vikin' addiction. Pills are so bad.
Starting point is 00:21:02 So bad. It was fucking bad, dude. At one point, how many Vicodin pills were you taking a day? Do you remember? Probably anywhere 40 to 60. In a day? Yeah, they said Brett Farve takes that. I do Brett Farve's numbers. I hung out with him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I could throw football. He's like, come on, man, take one. You're like Farve, chill out, dude. I was taking a lot and there was 40 is insane. And there was this sketch guy, I can't see his name. No, don't.
Starting point is 00:21:29 But he's like a 500 pound Mexican dude. Who's a fluffy? No, who else does sketch comedy? Gabriel Iglesias. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Sandborn, I remember saying right now would look at the window and he would just roll down the hill You know me it's a roll down and you that fucking bags of hills. Joey DS. It's somebody like that. Yeah, right anyway I almost died right and then what happened was I Went through a withdrawal that you wouldn't believe and I went to a hospital in San Diego and I was desperate I was dying and and what they did was they Abby my manager she booked me at a place called the optimum
Starting point is 00:22:10 optimum Health Institute It wasn't a fucking rehab. It was a it was a weak grass farm Oh my god, so I show up. I'm detoxing up a vikin and I'm in a room Abby has a room next to me Did she really into weak grass? No, she's like, I wanna lose weight. So you can detox here, but I could also lose weight. She was shoe-horning her weight loss.
Starting point is 00:22:34 You're a fucking rehab. So check it out, I'm at the optimum health. I wake up, I'm shaking, I'm going through with the, they don't have pills or nothing. And then they're drinking, you get weak rest for lunch. Is that dangerous? Can't you die? I could have died. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:48 And also, I need recovery. I need to go to a meeting. And I was desperate, dude. I was a board. No, I said an inch. Stop doing the board it. I'm sorry, I don't like the board it. I'm sorry, is this boring?
Starting point is 00:22:59 No, not at all. Here's a spiritual lake, any part. It's fun for me. Yeah, here's a spiritual lake. So one night I go, I swear, I fucking God. I's spiritual league any part. It's fun for me. Yeah. Here's a spiritual league of it. So one night I go, I swear to the fucking god, I need to go to meet you. This is not a recovery play.
Starting point is 00:23:10 I go, why am I here? And so I go, I go, give me money. She goes, why? I need money, give me money. She's giving me like 40 bucks. She goes, why I go, I'm gonna leave this place tonight at 11.30. I'm gonna hop out of the fence. I'm gonna round, it was in San Diego. I was gonna run tonight at 11.30. I'm gonna hop out of the fence.
Starting point is 00:23:25 I'm gonna round, it was in San Diego. I was gonna run down this hill. It was probably like a quarter of a mile, let's hill, right? And I know that there's an in and out, some from San Diego, around there. There is one down there. So I run down the salt, right? And I go to the in and out, and it was like,
Starting point is 00:23:41 all they had was weed crest. No, I ate, you know, hamburger, and then I went, there was a vans next door And also what yeah, I'm gonna go to the vans. There's always a vans next year Yeah, and there's 24 hours yeah always and and I was also like crying Desperate that I was desperate. I was praying to God when I was running running like I need help. Yeah, I feel lost and So this is gonna so cheesy. No, I feel lost. And so this is going to so cheesy. No, I like it. Barbie, come on. Okay, hi back. So here, so I met the vlogs and I go, you know what, I'm
Starting point is 00:24:12 with an apple. Oh, no, what guess? And Adam came out and you were Eve, and you started. No. I thought that was, what? I thought, and nothing to do with a pipe, those who was something to bubble go. Oh cool, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't think so at all. So, all right, so here, this is the cheesy part. What kind of apple?
Starting point is 00:24:37 For me, I like Laksins superb. I would imagine Fiji for you, but go ahead. I like Fiji, yeah. Yeah, yeah, red lips is good. Oh, so good ahead. I like Fiji. Yeah, Fiji. Red delish is good. Oh, so good. Golden delish is so good. Very good.
Starting point is 00:24:49 Anyway, let's give me a move on. Washington, there's so many. So I pick up an apple. Right? And I hear Bobby. The apple is talking to you? No. Oh.
Starting point is 00:25:00 What? Yeah. No. And it turned around. And there's a dude right behind me and he seems familiar. You know him but you don't remember? Yeah, it's been a while. Like I, it was he a teacher of my older man. Older man, right?
Starting point is 00:25:16 Older man. Yeah, that used to fuck this guy. I don't, you know. I mean, 50-50-50-50. Yeah, 50-50-50-50-50-50-50, right? And he goes, it's me. Will. Smith. No. Okay, 50, 50, yeah, right. And he goes, it's me, Will Smith. No, okay, sorry.
Starting point is 00:25:27 Some random guy named Will. Okay. Some random guy. And I go, dude, you were my first sponsor. You know what I mean? When I was 16, you know, I mean, whoa. And he goes, yeah, dude, he goes, what are you doing here? I go, you know, I relapse and then I, you know,
Starting point is 00:25:46 if I get it and then, oh, I ran down the cell, I told him the whole story, right? And I go, I go, what are you doing here? He goes, I was speaking at an A meeting in Arizona and I was driving back. Wow. And I'm on the freeway and I'm like, somebody told me to come here.
Starting point is 00:26:02 I just sort of got, I sort of got, he says this. Whoa. And he goes, and he goes, and I walk in, and there you are. And I go, how you like them apples? You didn't say that. It's not, no. Sorry. He could have though. And then he goes, I have all your,
Starting point is 00:26:18 like you want to call, I have everyone's number. From all the numbers, I lost the cast. From, right. So I got, you know, Dan, old man, Dan, old man, Dan, right? And I got all these guys numbers. And then that week, everyone picked me up at the optimum health institute to get you back,
Starting point is 00:26:33 to take me to meetings. It was a very essential, we, I mean, part of that. And I stayed sober for 17 years after that. That worked. But to me, that felt like a spiritual awakening. That is very deep. That is an actual spirit. It's probably coincidence.
Starting point is 00:26:50 No, I don't believe so. I've never asked you this. Do you believe the things happen for a reason? Like it's sort of like pre-planned destiny? Destiny, or do you think it's just random chaos? You know what I mean? It's tough. What do you think?
Starting point is 00:27:09 It's tough for me. What do you mean? Because my answer is gonna sound annoying. I wanna know for real. Well, it's gonna like be annoying. I'm okay with you, because I was really bothering me. No, you look so pretty.
Starting point is 00:27:20 I know my kids can't do it. Well the hat, but please leave the hair. No, please, if bothers are gonna be my, I'll leave the hair out there. You look so pretty with the hair. I actually looked at you a few times and I thought you fucking can't do it. Well the hat, but please leave the hair. No, please, if bothers are getting my eye, I'll leave the hair out there. You look so pretty with the hair. I actually looked at you a few times and I thought, you fucking sexy little Korean shit. That'd be great.
Starting point is 00:27:30 What's your name? Dutuy-ne. Oh, Dutuy and I, where are you from? Oook Island. Oook Island? Oook. Oook, like oak trees? No.
Starting point is 00:27:42 What, what no? Oook, my back. Oook, my back? Oook, my back island. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, No. What? No? Oh, come on back. Oh, oh, come on back. Oh, oh, come on back. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, so what do you believe? I believe that there is a part, there is things that are out of our control that I'm not saying it's supposed, it was supposed to happen. But I do think you do things in life that lead you to where you're definitely supposed to go. We were supposed to do this show and it was kind of unbeknownst to us. Like, you do believe that.
Starting point is 00:28:12 A little bit. That when we met that day at the store and became friendly with each other years and years ago, the universe was like, these energies will meet again. And I do kind of believe that. I don't know why. I don't, I, I'm not saying like, we're destined to have a huge podcast and, and, and go and tour the, no, I'm just saying, I believe that the universe wanted us to continue to come back together. And just like partially, if I'm going to be honest, I think the universe wanted me to be there for you and you to be there for me for my reasons, for your reasons, me kind of helping you get sober again or this show kind of reinvigorated a part of you
Starting point is 00:28:51 as a comedian and as a person and I don't know. And then you for me get more balanced. I understand that, but then how do you explain the kids that die in like, I'm not gonna say, I like, in Darfur, they're born with HIV. It's a war, war, war, war, in D'Arfur, they're born with HIV, it's a war torn country, they die as babies, I mean, what is their destiny?
Starting point is 00:29:10 What do you mean, they met with... I mean, did they have a destiny? I know, but that was their destiny. Yeah. To be born with HIV, did die in a war? No, of course not. No, I think that, I think that, like I said, no one's life is perfectly mapped out, but I think that when things happen in your life sometimes, it's out of your control.
Starting point is 00:29:32 Life is a mystery. Life is a mystery. But no, why do kids get that's why I don't believe in one omnipotent being. Why would you give children cancer? That's why I don't believe in one omnipotent being. I would, why would you give children cancer? That's insane. Yeah, I believe when I die, I'm gonna open my eyes and I'm gonna be in some sort of machine, right? And it's gonna, it's gonna open up, right?
Starting point is 00:29:54 And I'm gonna have a bunch of people, I kind of vaguely know they're gonna go, that was fun, right? Oh, that's cool. And I'm gonna go up and I go, whoa. And I was, I'm gonna be at some sort of arcade in the future. The dude, whoa. And I was, I'm gonna be at some sort of arcade in the future. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:06 But dude, that was only three fucking spectics. So they played you. It's their time, their money. Spectics. Spectic. I go, spectic, that's our money, right? Yeah, dude. Yeah, you wanted to, you, because you did the,
Starting point is 00:30:20 a factory and a comedy one. Yeah. You're gonna check out this other one. It's so much fun. That one that's successful. You could be home hardy. Oh, there's a timer. Yeah, but that's 40 seconds. That's spectacular.
Starting point is 00:30:31 So hard to get 40 spectics. Yeah, I don't have 40 spectics. And I'm gonna like realize, holy shit, it's all gonna come into me. I go, oh my god. And I'm gonna look at my body. I'm gonna be like nine foot nine. That's how tall I am.
Starting point is 00:30:42 Doubt it. Yeah, I'm seven foot three, but everyone else is nine. Nine right? Right, right, right, right. And I'm not even, you know, I'm speaking a different language. I'm like, ah, you know what I mean? And I'm gonna go to my fucking, and I'm gonna realize, oh shit, I washed dishes
Starting point is 00:30:57 at this truck stop in space. Right, and I just, I'm gonna realize the three spectacles that I spent right was my month worth of month month of life that was your lifetime life my life's the savings back to the day my mom's like why did I pick the fat Korean ride imagine you're a beautiful handsome like male model in that other world yeah you picked this body and this thing could you thought it'd be funny to be a comedian then you go back to watching dishes and you realize the whole time, you'd rather
Starting point is 00:31:27 be a hot guy that watches dishes and stuff. Right. Then pays three spectics to be a Bobby lady. Yeah, but it'll be interesting. I think that's what's going to happen. I'm kidding. I would pay so many spectics to be you. You're worth all the spectics. If everyone's life is a ride, like let's see how much spectics it would be. Yeah. Like Carlos' ride. You know the ones at... We're future people, we're aliens or whatever. We're at an arcade that has this thing. You know that you know the rides at six flags that do like just like 80 loops in a row and then it also goes backwards. That's his fucking shit. Mine's scared straight. Like if you're in trouble, you're a teenager in space. They make you be me on earth. If you were a roller coaster. They're gonna wake up, they're gonna die,
Starting point is 00:32:06 they're gonna go in and they're like, oh wow, glory holes are bad. You're right. They'll learn something. Not bad. But if they did your ride at the arcade. Oh, okay, okay, yeah. I just, are we on the right?
Starting point is 00:32:18 How many? Frequency? Frequency? Oh my God. He's not, you know why? Cause he's hung over and he's guilty. No, I had a burger. I've been drinking water all day.
Starting point is 00:32:24 What did you do when you left my house? I woke up the next morning. Where did you go? Did you go get food? I went home? I didn't you didn't go through a drive-through no What do you think it's gonna happen when you die? Don't give me heaven. Give me something else. I don't have it I don't fucking when you die what's gonna happen nothing this? No, I think I'm reincarnated I Believe in reincarnation. I think what can do what? I come back. I mean, this time, I kind of know a grasshopper. Holy shit.
Starting point is 00:32:49 I'll tell you why when I was a kid. Wow. Kids were killing grasshoppers in the neighborhood. What kind of fucked up kids were you hanging out with? I went to a terminally mentally challenged school. These kids were killing grasshoppers and I stopped someone from doing it and he was like, why? I was like, I don't know. I don't like it. I didn't like it. And I thought,
Starting point is 00:33:10 that's going to be me someday. And something's going to save me. Wow. And the universe paid itself off that day. Wow. There was a weirdo in our neighborhood. You just reminded me. He go catch fish down by the water and he'd throw them against the wall. What a fucking asshole. Dude the first I remember the first time I saw it and I was like he's gonna kill people when he gets big He'll kill people. He would just throw a fish against the wall. Yeah, and he was so crazy But no one could say anything cuz he would have beat the shit out of us He was huge. He was like a he was like a fat one. I was lower than the other one He was like a fat goon and he would catch fish and be like
Starting point is 00:33:44 In a check it out. Yeah, he was huckin against the wall dude, and was like a fat goon. And he would catch fish and be like, he would check it out. Yeah, he'd huck it against the wall. Dude. And we were also scared to say anything. I imagine if that happened to us, we get dragged into water and a fish throws us against the fucking coral reef. And that's what you'd get.
Starting point is 00:33:55 I'm already drowning. I hope that's what he would get. That's why reincarnation is real. Oh, wow, dude. I think so. I think I'm coming back as a grasshopper. What would you think would happen? Because I indirectly killed a bird. Dude, that's weird. You said that. think would happen because I indirectly killed a bird.
Starting point is 00:34:05 Dude, that's weird, you said that? I thought I think you'd come back as a bird, but a flightless bird. Whoa, like what do you call it? You're a dodo. It's a thing of flamingo. Just a dodo. A dodo, what's a, don't call me that.
Starting point is 00:34:18 You're a dodo. I'm a dodo bird. No, he's a dodo. This is a hundred percent of bobbily. That's not you, that's a hundred percent. I guess that is me. Look at that. That's me dodo. This is 100% of Bobby Lee. That's not you. That's 100% you. That is, I guess that is me. Look at that. That's major.
Starting point is 00:34:27 I just woke up. It's three. Look at that. Yeah. And look at all happy. Oh, you're so happy. That is Bobby Lee. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:34:36 A flightless bird. The only reason they say these things survived so long is because there was no predators. Really? Nobody wanted to eat it. Wow. I think it's a lot of time. They were in Australia, right?
Starting point is 00:34:46 They're still alive. I don't think there's a lot left. They're still going. Are they still around? Extinct. Don't it became sick less than 80 years later because the deforestation, hunting, and destruction there, yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:57 Yeah, so they did die out. We can bring them back. They've got to be able to bring these things back. I imagine all the things, man, that we fucked it, extinct. Well, dinosaurs weren't our fault. back. Imagine all the things, man, that we fucked it, extinct. Well, dinosaurs weren't our fault. I know, but after that, man. What, like, what things do we extinct?
Starting point is 00:35:12 Well, I know there's like two snow leopards left. No, there's more than two. How many snow leopards are out there? There's six, seven thousand, not bad. Four, dude, four species of antelope, four thousand is a lot that good, that's not a good number. Okay, Boston was about that, like 4,000, 5,000 people. That was a lot of snow leopards in that.
Starting point is 00:35:32 The Boston, the arena that, or the theater we played in Boston, you tell me if that was where all snow leopards, you wouldn't be like, that's a fuckload of snow leopards. Oh, let me think. Spread across the world though. Yeah, yeah, that's a lot. Too many. Plenty. Yeah, it's the animal's? Yeah, yeah, that's a lot. That's a lot. Too many. Plenty.
Starting point is 00:35:45 Yeah, it's the animals, humans of K-Buff. All right, the Stellar C-Cow, which is also Carlos' mom. BOOM! You've met my mom. What'd you say? You've met my mom. I know, I love you, mom.
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Starting point is 00:39:05 were pretty unattractive. It's like we killed all the ugly ones and kept the cute ones. But why, like, you know, people get killed for like tusks. It's, it's, if you're an animal with a tusk, you know, right, or horns,
Starting point is 00:39:18 or any of that kind of stuff, you're pretty fucked, huh? No, no, what do you mean? Well, I mean, that's the why people got, that's why people killed them for like, hey, look what I got. Not all of them. People took elephant toss for ivory
Starting point is 00:39:32 because it was a, it was a tradable good. I'm not saying that. What do they use ivory for? No one. What do you use ivory for? Well, it used to be piano keys for one thing, but ivory can be used for a myriad of things. Counter tops, tables, I mean,
Starting point is 00:39:43 wow, that's why they killed them. Jewelary piano keys, yeah. That be used for a myriad of things. Counter tops, tables, I mean, wow. Figured they killed them. Jewelry, piano keys. Wow. Yeah. Chess sets. You ever played chess with ivory chess pieces? Whoop. They're nice.
Starting point is 00:39:53 Whoop. Very nice. So interesting. I've never played chess. A collector's mentality, people have also been known to use bribe government officials because it's rare than money or gold. Right. People go on those hunting expeditions and they get elephant tusks.
Starting point is 00:40:04 They're like, Trump's kids. Yeah. Yeah, they go on those hunting expeditions and they get elephant tusks. They're like trumps kids. Yeah. Yeah, they got to do it, right? They got to do it. Go get me a tusk. Hahaha. Have you ever been to somebody's house
Starting point is 00:40:12 who has like dear antlers on the fucking wall? No. Not you. Never. But it's the same. Yeah, I've never thought of it creeps me out. Yeah, I've never seen a hunter's lodge. Yeah, why would we go?
Starting point is 00:40:22 I know, I want to go to a hunter's lodge. I mean, I've been to, that's not true. Well, I've never been to like a guy's house that hunts, but I've been to a place to hunt. Yeah, it's interesting people do it, and they have the half the body of something, something, on the wall. Yeah, right?
Starting point is 00:40:37 No, it's usually the head. Oh, it's the head. Why do they do humans? Why don't... Steps up, let let's just let's again. The way you asked humans in was something that you been thinking about for so long for so long and you were like and you looked at me like we're I'm about to bond with
Starting point is 00:41:02 Bobby. You go, humans? Fuck yeah, that's what I've been thinking about. Yeah, but if you die, and I had like a Bobby, like your original body, like in my living room that'd be insanely awesome. Like the top Bobby. No, you wanna keep his dead body in your living room? Well, I mean, they make it all nice and stuff.
Starting point is 00:41:22 Like they do for the long life. They make it all nice and stuff. Yeah, they like make they put wax on him. Do you mean they? Who's they? They petrify him. You mean you're talking about like taxidermy? Yeah. Do you want a taxidermy Bobby? That's just the top like sticking out of a wall. Like his bust. Yeah, exactly, but you know, not like standing free. It could come out of the wall like a TV. Oh, cool. Yeah. So when you have people over, you're like, that's my old buddy Bobby.
Starting point is 00:41:48 Yeah. And what expression do I have? Let me guess. Let me. What? What? What? Was your friend taking a shit when he died?
Starting point is 00:41:58 No, no, he's Asian. Yeah. Oh, he's Asian. He's Asian. If you had the bust of me in your house, what would my expression be? Very stoic and serious. Also look like I'm taking a shit. Oh, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's he said that. Cause you know he's been waiting to be like, don't you guys think slavery's like not that bad? You know what I mean? He says stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:42:28 You know he says stuff like that. Yeah, it's deep inside. No, I'm not pro slavery. Yeah. What about, sounds like there's a butt coming at it. What about formaldehyde? Yeah, if you put me in a tuxedo and a top hat.
Starting point is 00:42:42 Yeah. And I'm just floating in formaldehyde. No, they dip you in it. They don't, you don't float it. They dip you in it. Well, so what's the stuff that they put with the frogs? Cato and a top hat. Yeah. And I'm just floating in formaldehyde. Is that great? No, they dip you in it. You don't float it. They dip you in it. What's the stuff that they put with the frogs? They put in the jar.
Starting point is 00:42:50 Like an independent say. Well, yeah, they put a jar and that liquid. What's that liquid in the jar? That might be formaldehyde. That's what I'm saying. But I don't think you could float in that. I think when they do that, they put it inside of your body. Look up.
Starting point is 00:43:02 I think they put formaldehyde inside of your body. But it probably works to be on a jar. Real like a like a Disney like Walt Disney's head. Yeah. Well, he's crowd genically frozen. Isn't he frozen? I think I put them in jars. There we go, dude. Man, it's just like that we got to go to the head. Well, that's just Halloween. Here's Oh, there I am. That's had a Portuguese university in its well
Starting point is 00:43:23 perspective. See, this is perfect. That's kind of looks like you. Yeah. I know, dude. So doing that, but my whole body, yeah, just a good idea, dude. And this would be all, too. Oh, cute. You wouldn't want that whole body. Imagine how weird your penis looks floating in a jar with you.
Starting point is 00:43:40 Oh, that's right. You know, I think about that all the time, like, you know people say they slip in the shower and they die. You know, that think about that all the time. Like, you know how people say they slip in the shower and they die, you know that happens a lot, like they're slipping the tub. And I think, I would please God don't let me slip in the shower and die because they see you, what are you in?
Starting point is 00:43:54 And you're wet with your little penis is wet. And it's tiny because you're in the shower. Like your little wet penis and your dead. That's why I got rid of my fungus. Because you don't want to die. My left foot, remember I had a fungus on my back. Yeah. It's all gone got rid of my fungus. Because you don't want to die. My left foot, remember I had a fungus on my left. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:07 It's all gone, but the reason that my biggest fear was, if I died and then I had to find my body, my brother would be like, yeah, that's him. Look at the foot. Look at his foot. I gotta get rid of that. You gotta get rid of it. Like my dick.
Starting point is 00:44:20 Why do you care about your dick after your dead? Listen, what I'm saying is, I'll tell you, I used to have a joke about it, but I wanted to die with clothes on because it genuinely scared me, because paramedics are gonna come in the room and they're gonna go, dude. No, they're not!
Starting point is 00:44:34 Yeah, they are. No, they're gonna be, Santino, look. If it was a murder scene, no. But if it was just, I had a heart attack. They're gonna laugh, they're gonna go, dude, that's the bad friend's guy. Look at his little naked wet penis.
Starting point is 00:44:45 Like if I had to identify your body, you know the unzip. Yeah. And they look at your face, right? You're not the unzip. No, no, no. I'm gonna go, can you zip it further down? No, not you.
Starting point is 00:44:55 I wanna go. I'm saying the paramedics walk in, the corner walks in, and they go, don't touch it, you know, we're trying to leave the body alone until you know, paramedics go, and they all get in there and they're looking at me in the shower, and the water's like, you know, we're trying to leave the body alone until, you know, Paramount is going to, and they all get in there and they're looking at me in the shower and the water's running and I'm wet and my penis is tiny resting against my balls
Starting point is 00:45:13 and I'm dead and you know, one of them's gonna go, it's not even that cold in here. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You think those guys don't make jokes sometimes? If it's a murder scene, no. But if it's just a regular death, you don't think those guys make some kind of, how do you deal with it? This is what I would do. This is what I would do.
Starting point is 00:45:32 I'd see your body and I would look at your head and go, oh, fuck, I'm a huge fan. And I would look down and I'd go. See? I'd say, yes. It's a little, you know what I mean? Everybody's penis is gross and water is so. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:45:44 When you get out of the shower, yeah, unless you're like hooking up and you have a hard on, when you just get out of the shower, your penis is so weird and wet and like sad. And like a little, you know what, it looks like one of the extinct animals that we had, one of those little, yeah, it's gross dude.
Starting point is 00:46:00 Huh. You look at your penis after you take a shower, huh? Looking at it the whole time. I'm trying to kiss it. Yeah. I'm doing stretches. That's why I hurt my back. You might take though.
Starting point is 00:46:10 It goes, if I pull it out right now, don't even see it. I'm not going to. But it's in my body. Oh, it goes. It goes all the way in. It's the whole thing just goes in my body. Do you know why you know why it does that?
Starting point is 00:46:20 It wants to stay warm. It gets closer to the warmth. Is that why? Yeah, it squiggles in. That's why your balls go up stairs when you're in cold water. I stalled. You stalled?
Starting point is 00:46:31 I stalled your wife's joke. What? I stole it. What joke? With the white, the little people. Oh my god, yeah, yeah, yeah. I said it on a podcast. That's okay.
Starting point is 00:46:42 And I didn't give her credit. That's okay. I just feel like I was a thief. That's nice. That I didn't give a credit. That's okay. I just feel like I was a thief. That's nice. That joke was so good. Yeah, that was my wife. It got a huge laugh. What pod?
Starting point is 00:46:51 I don't, I'm trying to think about what, but I remember thinking when I said it, I was like, oh my God, what am I missing out? But I was like, but I was like, oh, I have to tell them that I said that. Yeah. They don't want you guys to think that I stole, you know what I mean? That's okay.
Starting point is 00:47:04 But that's nice to say that to the audience. I mean, this will never cross guys to think that I stole, you know what I mean? It's okay. But that's nice to say that to the audience. I mean, this will never cross paths, but it's- Tell people the joke. You tell people the joke. You're the one that told it. Well, you said, you're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- We're- Little people have bad breath. Yeah. And then your right is proposed. It's because their assholes are closer to their mouth.
Starting point is 00:47:29 Their esophagus is so short. And when she said that was like, dude, that's the funniest thing I've ever heard. The very good joke. She knocked that one. That's a whole minute. That was very good. That was fucking so funny. Very good one.
Starting point is 00:47:41 I got to tell you, we have... Nevermind. And I just said, let's just say it. There's little people couple in our neighborhood and they went trick or treating last year. And they went as full size people. They were stills. That's clever.
Starting point is 00:47:59 No, they didn't do that up here. No, I was like, that's genius. No, they didn't do that, I'm kidding. I was like, that's genius. No, they didn't do that. Wow, they didn't do that. But I am excited to feed the little kids candy because I love, I get excited. In fact, anybody who doesn't decorate their house, if you live in a neighborhood where kids come through,
Starting point is 00:48:16 right, well, you're in the hills. No one's gonna come up in the hills. But if you live in the flats, if you live in a neighborhood that's not hard to get to, and you don't decorate the house a little bit and you don't hand out candy, you're a piece of shit person. And I mean, you're a piece of shit. Because I remember what it felt like when I was a kid,
Starting point is 00:48:31 and we would go to houses that were decorated, and it felt like what a fucking cool, weird night where people you never met before open up their home and they give you candy. And it just, and we're all in this together. It's like a mob mentality but for good. And then there's people, I remember houses that never turned, they turned all the lights off
Starting point is 00:48:49 and they never decorated and there was no candy. And I wanted to fucking break all their windows. You're lying. And we'd egg those houses. When I was a teenager, we'd egg the dark houses. If you didn't decorate, you got egged. And I think today, kids should be doing that. I think you should be egg in houses that don't decorate.
Starting point is 00:49:05 You know what I would do? Smoke meth? No, I would address up to right, and when they'd bring my dog out and open it, they'd go, trick or treat. You know what I'd go? I'd be like, I'd have my own basket, I'd go, trick or treat!
Starting point is 00:49:19 Oh nice, yeah, yeah, yeah, reverse psychology. And then they would have to give me their candy. Smart. Smart. Has that ever been done? Oh yeah, got a good, yeah, reverse psychology. And then they would have to give me their candy. Smart. Smart. Has that ever been done? Oh, yeah. Got to go. Yeah, yeah, yeah, by a mentally unstable person. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:30 Yeah. Yeah. Imagine what Halloween is like in a mental institution. All right. Everyone's just going around. Yeah. What do you mean? Imagine a mental institution during Halloween.
Starting point is 00:49:40 Yeah. They dress up like normal, wealth, like full functioning adults. Yeah. And they have full conversations like, how was your 401k, Mark? They pretend to be totally normal. Yeah. That's cool, man. How's your wife and your kids?
Starting point is 00:49:57 That'd be cool. Oh, dude, there was an old woman in our neighborhood who used to hand out change. That's good. And this is so mean. Then the kids would, when they would leave, they'd throw it at her house. That's good. And this is so mean, then the kids would, when they would leave, they'd throw it at her house. Cause they would.
Starting point is 00:50:08 Well, it was like panties. She'd give you like more panties. Oh, wow, wow. So kids would walk down the street. They would throw it at her house. Yeah. And it was like mean, but funny, but like also don't give people panties.
Starting point is 00:50:18 What the fuck? Yeah, or don't put razor blades in the apple. No, no, not in an apple. You got to be way more creative nowadays. What do you mean? You gotta put in something that's a little bit tricky. I mean, if you put in a Reese's peanut butter cup, I gotta tell you, it lays per-
Starting point is 00:50:31 Like what would you do? A titsy roll. You could unwrap that. You put a needle in there, yeah. Not a needle, but what's fun to put in? By the way, I think this is- Oh, dude. I think this is lore.
Starting point is 00:50:39 How many times did they really find out? Who's taking the time to do this? And also, you're gonna be able to find the house? Yeah, well, no, you're not, because you're getting to the camp. All right, all right. Wow, let me look at that. Whoa, dude.
Starting point is 00:50:50 See, this is my problem. Who does that? Somebody did that. They put a nail in a fucking kit cap. Yeah, somebody's a piece of shit. What a piece of shit, dude. But you know what's crazy? That's Carlos, yeah, Carlos.
Starting point is 00:51:01 Carlos and I have caramel apples this year. What's insane is they say check your kids candy. Do you think parents go through all of their kids can't they be hard to do? Oh, way. Would you let your kid trick or treat when your kids old enough? I think so,
Starting point is 00:51:14 because I never had Halloween when I was a kid. You guys don't do anything like that? Now, it's universal, but when I was growing up, they had carnival and things like that, but it wasn't as fun as DSTLSWERTUS, right? That's Mexico. Yeah, right. That's the real one. Oh, I love Mexicans. Yeah, this is maybe this the dopest VLODO that's the coolest. Yeah, so cool. So what is it called that's calling that makeup? The Calaberas, the Scalcs, Scalcs. What is this called in Spain?
Starting point is 00:51:46 This is the other of those mortals, but we don't celebrate it like this. Do you say that's what those were our religious day? The day of the dead? Yeah. But you don't celebrate anything like that, huh? No, no, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:51:56 That would have killed so many people for somebody's rights. Right. So you're afraid they'll all come back and it's like in Killa. Yes. This reminds me of Coco. I don't know if you saw Coco,
Starting point is 00:52:04 what am I saying? Yeah, that movie made me cry, too. Of course, what do you mean, bald? If you didn't cry, Coco, you're... That movie made me cry, I didn't love Coco. If you didn't cry at almost every Pixar movie, you're a fucking weirdo. Okay, what's the most you cry at an Pixar movie?
Starting point is 00:52:18 I know right now. Go. Up. The month. The month, the month, huh? Yeah. The beginning, yeah. it'll break your little fun It'll hurt but the rest of the movie you don't cry, but you cry there. Yeah, when his wife dies beautiful montage
Starting point is 00:52:32 I didn't cry at all for inside out that wasn't a cry for me I didn't cry and I didn't cry that I liked it though. It was good. Yeah, I didn't cry there And then what was one with the with the black guy who's a jazz musician? Error Griffin It was good. Yeah, I didn't cry there. And then what was one with the black guy who's a jazz musician? So. Error Griffin. Yeah. So yeah, so do you see that? Yeah, but I didn't even cry either.
Starting point is 00:52:49 I didn't see it. Is it good? It wasn't good. No, it wasn't that good. Is it an Asian one? I think that. Yeah. Mulan.
Starting point is 00:52:57 Mulan. That's not that. Oh, that's not. Yeah, Mulan. I'm not talking about Pixar. I'm talking about Pixar. Yeah, the color of Pixar. The turning red. Turning red is my documentary. It's also not not turning red. Is it about Asians who drink? Yes, I never saw the first person saw that the first Asian lead movie is what it is
Starting point is 00:53:13 The first Asian lead Pixar film. Yeah, it's turning Yeah, is that you Bob? Yeah, and all of the kids got to meet Bobby Lee that day. I did one movie called wish dragon But I don't think anyone saw it show me wish dragon Oh, that's so cute. Is it all Asian? Yeah, are you the dragon? No, I'm like a henchman Cool who plays the dragon a famous Asian guy at Jackie Chan Really I think so he can barely speak English What does that say there you are that you playing the henchman?
Starting point is 00:53:54 Oh constants woo Jimmy. Oh, yeah, that's me. That's me. Oh, there's oh, that's great. Yeah I mean that must have made some good money, huh? I've never heard of this. Is it not out? Maybe it's not out? It's out! It's been out for years! Fuck you, man! You never heard of that! Hey, box office mojo. And they watch everything. It's bad. Box office mojo, that movie.
Starting point is 00:54:16 Dragon, whatever. Whist dragon, box office mojo. Let's check it out. It made 21 million holy shit. That's bad That movie probably costs like 300 million to make Whoa It's bad wait 21 million it was never a United States release right only put it there They also only streamed it will do wish dragon budget. Why why would I I play a handsomere who gives a shit's not your fault? I do nothing. Wow, they lost four million bucks. No, plus all the market. Right. So they lost 50 million bucks. Dude, can you imagine being part of a production company? That's a great rating though.
Starting point is 00:54:55 6870. It's really good. Yeah. Can you imagine me in the production company and they're like, this is going to be it. It's going to be this beautiful animated Asian movie. It's going to crush. Yeah. And then they're like, we lost 50 million. It's funny, you know, you have literally no control of like when you get, no, no control. You get it, you go, me? I hope it works.
Starting point is 00:55:16 You want me? And then you dream. Yeah, you go, you know, you kind of go, oh, this is gonna be it, and then I'm gonna do other things. And this is gonna be my Ted Lashow. It never, it's always like that. And then you're like, oh, I'll is gonna be it. And then I'm gonna do other things. This is gonna be my Ted Lashow. But it never, it's always like that. And then you're like, oh, I'll wait back in line.
Starting point is 00:55:28 Yeah, I'll back, back where I belong. Like a couple of years later, you get something else and then you go back in line. It's really, when people hit a home run, it's in front, no people do though. Yeah, it almost never happens. Yeah, I know. The point is it almost never happens.
Starting point is 00:55:41 But people, yeah. You know who I think is gonna hit a home run soon? Oh, fancy. Oh yeah. I actually think something's coming for him. You know who I think is gonna hit a home run soon? Ooh, fancy. Oh yeah. I actually think something's coming for him. You know why this universal thing? I swear to God, I feel like something's coming. But what I do wanna say that I'm not happy about
Starting point is 00:55:53 is this SOSVHS and how we deserve residuals for it. You know, it's, it's, he started that on the heels of this place. He's utilizing all of that. On my back. On our back. You started it on my back dog. And also, are we gotten paid for that? Do we get paid for that?
Starting point is 00:56:08 You guys get anything you want. Really? Okay. Okay. Give me a white kid. No, no. The numbers are okay. No. You know, they're good. They're good. They're good. They're it's good for a guy who literally never did podcasting. So he came to us. Right. It's you know, some people you you give them a little Give them an inch and they take a mile, but you they take the whole empanada. I've seen you on stage before. Yeah Do I have you see them at the live shows? Yeah, you know, do I watch him when we're doing? No And when he walks out I could see the crowd sharing. Yeah, then I can see his ego and everything
Starting point is 00:56:43 He just gets out like it's a drug. Yeah, not right. Gink to it. Why do you then why do the. You're projecting your project. In. Whoa. I'm not tired of fight. Dude, I'm not projecting. Dude, you better leave Barbie alone. You saw me going to stay. I'm I'm shaking. He is a little excitement. Yeah. Yeah. You know what? George hasn't. Yeah, George's sick. George has it. He loves the fame. What about you, Carlos? You know he loves the fame.
Starting point is 00:57:09 He's fucking eating it up. Yeah, it's nice. What is your Instagram following growing? Yeah. Are you getting a lot of DMs? Because I saw you at I'm Boston. Remember what I whisper to you. Yeah, it was so weird.
Starting point is 00:57:21 What I was pretty, what do you say? What I whisper to you on stage. Do you feel like you're a big deal? No, she said that to me when I grabbed him out of the elevator at the hotel Do you feel like you're a big deal? No, and then I yelled you're projecting on to no you are a big deal act like you're a big deal So not true bro if your actions Coral it with how you feel, but I don't act like I mean his head is big is getting bigger for sure Yeah, yeah, you have like when you pick us up at that hotel stuff to go to the venue
Starting point is 00:57:50 Yeah, you have this when you're walking this way guys and you're like almost like get out of the way Yeah, I'm trying to do my job well important people are coming through and when I look at you I go just calm down dude. You're not that big of a deal. It's because you were probably power hungry. A little bit, dude, be honest. Like, yeah. Are you a little power hungry? It's just a tiny bit. Okay.
Starting point is 00:58:11 That's okay. At least you're not just ready. I admit it. Yeah, projection, see, you like it too. You think I, dude, I'm like, not me, dude. You think me, you think me? Yes. I think you.
Starting point is 00:58:21 Bobby, are you giving me an example why I'm power hungry? No, I think you like power. You like fame. No, I know, when I'm at the venue, I don't, I think you Bobby. Oh, well, you can even example why I'm power hungry. No, I think you like power You like fame like no, I know you when I'm at the venues. I know I don't I I'm scared that's so not true Who asked more of a star him or me? I Think you you You hide in the green room. That's what shite stars are to. That's the stars do. Oh, they do. Andrew says hide in like the stage hands. Where we hide? I go say hi to everybody. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I want to talk to them. Yeah They're probably for every time I meet a stage and I go are you related to me? They're probably family members of mine. Yeah
Starting point is 00:58:57 Is many laborers I have what do you what is this video? Oh, gosh? It's actually the big foot and also what we what we do? What can we do this? What is this? Oh, yeah. Well, let's see this real fast. What is this? A new big foot video. It's pretty crazy. Dude, I saw this. Tell me if you think this is bullshit. I've never seen it. So this couple from a Colorado train says they captured this. Huh. And it's a video of a big foot. Okay. Now loop it again. Go backwards. You can see. Look at that. Oh, wow. It's a big foot. Shut up, fancy. Oh, wow. God, damn it. What do you think? I like how they, fancy. Oh wow. God damn it. What do you think? I like how they're highlighted, like you didn't see it.
Starting point is 00:59:29 Wow. What do you think? Any head down, I just, I gotta say this. If this was coordinated, pretty good timing on a moving train going on a Colorado, because this is far away. Yeah. Wow.
Starting point is 00:59:44 That's not no big put, dude. But if Bigfoot, who is that? What is that? It's like a Duncan Trussell. You think that's DT? No, but it's that type of dude. You know those guys are like, I'm gonna live in the wild.
Starting point is 00:59:55 I'm gonna do something fucked up. Yeah, yeah. Or a Shafir, yeah. Like Harry out there, I wanna be detached from society. I just don't get it. That's a hairy thing. It's weird. You can't really tell, but I can't tell, dude't get it. That's a hairy thing. It's weird.
Starting point is 01:00:05 You can't really tell, but I can't tell, dude. But it's in the middle of nowhere. They did say it's in the middle of nowhere. Also, of all the places that I thought Bigfoot would be, not in Colorado. Yeah, also. I thought it'd be way up north in Canada, like. And he decides in open sun, sit in the middle.
Starting point is 01:00:24 You, he would sit behind a tree or under why would he do this? Well, he's going to get food or somewhere. He's pulling take a shit. Yeah, oh yeah, that is weird. He does blend in really well. Yeah What do we think do we think this is real? I gotta see a body then I gotta see we gotta kill it. Well, we gotta kill it. Yeah, I gotta kill one and see. What if that's, what if that, what if when Jesus came back, he came back as Bigfoot? Wow. That's how he hit it.
Starting point is 01:00:52 All these years, he's just super-faceted. He's just having fun with us. What is this thing? What is this? Yeah, what is this? Let's do it. Oh, no. Hey, Andrew.
Starting point is 01:01:03 Hey, Bobby. You've been really really by friends. And now you have to prove that you care about the ones who look so hard for you. We have been to glory holes and milk and tables for you. At least one of us has. All you want. Anyway, in front of each of you, there's a color. Please put it on. It's won't work unless you put it on. So please put it on. I'll wait. Yeah. I get it all. I don't want to be shocked. Does it hurt? Yeah Yeah, it's for sure it hurts
Starting point is 01:01:45 It's not on let me see set it off. It's not on it's not on it It's my con got it wrong theme. So this is a barking thing. It doesn't work. It's just out now Do we believe these fucking guys? No for real but come got the wrong one so I can't I don't do the remote control So how does it work you have to bark? Really put it on in bark. Oh, you put it on bark. Root, Root, Root. Wait, put it on. Get your arm. That's big. It's your throat. No, it doesn't know if it's a throat. Nothing. This is them fucking with us just making us bark at these
Starting point is 01:02:21 collars. That's so funny. I'll be fucking ass on it. That was good. That is very fucking, dude, that's very good. Fuck you! No, that's good, you got us. That was a very thing, dude. If you fucking do something, Carlos, I'll fucking eat this shit out of you. I'm dead, so I'll fuck you up.
Starting point is 01:02:43 Fucking dick. I want to say something Carlos. Yeah, what's up? I will give you a thousand dollars in cash if you There's no remote I promise you I'll give you ten grand the fucking Okay, we're obeying the orders. Okay, so obviously Spanish. I mean, dude, it's so funny when you hear me, he's like, dude, people have done so much for you. Of all the people that speak clear, coherent English at the studio, I found it to be a lot more menacing.
Starting point is 01:03:15 Yeah, with the Spanish actor, it's a little bit more menacing. All right, let's see the rest of the video. Is it, is there something that's gonna? You have to answer two or three questions correctly. For everyone answer, you get a shock and surprise. Ha ha ha ha. Answer wisely. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 01:03:34 What did bad friends start? What do you want to know? What year? Yeah. Oh fuck. No, this is good. start what do you want to know what year? Yeah. Oh fuck. No this is good. Now I wish we did have the shockers.
Starting point is 01:03:50 2020. That's right. What is what This is just for them to have yeah go what is it do it this is the solve way at this point this has nothing to do with us Get it out Oh my god Oh my god you can't get you can't get through it What is college's birthday? The month of the birthday month April
Starting point is 01:04:51 I can't hear what he's saying No surprise. Yeah, no shocked. I'll thank yeah We'll part of Spain is fancy from We'll part of Spain is fancy from Southern that's that's not true The fucking hard dude what the fuck dude I fucking that's not fucking funny. I fucking told you not to do it dude Dude I'm not putting the fuck fuck you dude Got it wrong baby. You lost
Starting point is 01:05:43 It's not fucking funny dude. You just said that it wasn't fucking, he the fuck. Happy Halloween! And thank you for being a bad friend! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!
Starting point is 01:06:12 Woo!

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