Bad Friends - Good Times Energy w/ Jack Black
Episode Date: August 5, 2024Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Hexclad, ZocDoc, Displate, Morgan & Morgan & Shopify • Hexclad: Get 10% off at https://hexclad.com.../badfriends • ZocDoc: Find and book top rated doctors at https://www.zocdoc.com/badfriends • Displate: Go to https://DISPLATE.COM/BADFRIENDS and use code BADFRIENDS at the checkout to get up to 33% off. Displate, collect your passions! • Morgan & Morgan: If you’re ever injured, you can check out Morgan & Morgan. Their fee is free unless they win. For more information go to https://ForThePeople.com/badfriends or dial Pound LAW (Pound 529) from your cell phone. This is a paid advertisement. • Shopify: Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://www.shopify.com/badfriends YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Jack Black Can't Ollie 6:00 Jack Black Helps Bobby With Women 9:00 Dead Man Walking 13:45 Starstruck 24:45 Jack Black Brings Good Times Energy 38:00 Bombing On Stage 46:00 Channeling 53:00 Borderlands Movie 1:08:00 Minecraft More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Juicy Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/?hl=en More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@SOSVHS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This episode contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ads Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
You two are bad friends.
Who are these two idiots?
Woo-hoo!
White dude and Asian dude.
Woo-hoo!
You two are disgusting.
Woo-hoo!
Oh, you two are something.
We're bad friends.
Is it uncomfortable?
It's not uncomfortable.
You know what we should do?
We should get the nicest chairs we can find, like really high end, but only one of them.
So then if you have two guests,
one of the best guests gets it.
I don't even know where you buy chairs.
Where do you buy chairs?
Where would you buy chairs?
I do some Amazon purchasing of,
no, I haven't bought any chairs on Amazon.
No, but I have bought like camping chairs on Amazon.
Yeah.
And if you go high end camping chair, you can go like Zero Grav. I've gotten a Zero Gra camping chairs on Amazon. And if you go high end camping chair,
you can go like zero grav.
I've gotten a zero grav chair on Amazon.
What's a zero grav?
It makes you feel like it's zero gravity
where you feel like you're floating.
But really it's just the angle of that Barca lounge.
Whoa, I think I need one
because I play Stardew Valley so much
that like my back is being to hurt.
Probably a symptom of playing too much video games.
I think I like hunch over like this and I also kind of dip.
Whoa, look at that Zero Gravity gaming chair.
Whoa, that's what I want.
The scorpion?
Yeah, does it come with the girl or no?
Yeah.
Not that I would, you know, she would like clean and stuff, you know.
That's why you game in Zero Gravity?
Yeah.
That's great.
I just bought off the internet, I bought those little like really low to the ground chairs
so when we go to,
cause it's summertime dude
and it's gonna be movies in the cemetery.
Have you been?
I have been to that place.
Is that Hollywood is Forever?
Yeah, Forever Cemetery.
Great spot.
We love going, every year we go watch a cool movie.
We've done like, they did Kill Bill one and two,
we've done Beetlejuice.
It's, have you ever done the movie theater in the cemetery?
Sinespia?
No.
Alright man. Welcome our guest Jack Black. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, dude. Yes, I've been. Well, thanks for adding to the conversation.
I mean, it's crazy right now, dude. It's too early for me.
Everybody welcome Jack Black to the show.
Jack Black, everybody!
I want to say this about you, Jack Black.
Oh, yeah. I have so many things to say.
Maybe one of the most...
Bingo.
...lovable, funny, beautiful people we have on Earth right now.
Who? Me? Bobby. Bobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. funny, beautiful people we have on earth right now.
Who? Me?
Bobby.
Bobby, for sure.
Yeah, I just wanted to say,
I wanted you to recognize what I was saying.
Yeah, you know, may I say stuff?
Yeah, please.
I think you're one of the most beautiful, funny,
fun-loving.
You can't do the same thing.
You have to mix it up.
My own thing?
Yeah, do your own thing.
Dynamic.
Yep.
Versatile.
Oh yeah. Yeah, creative.
Do you say that already?
No, but it's all kind of wrapped in.
Oddly nimble.
You are, you are.
You're oddly nimble.
You're talking about me?
Yeah, you're dancing.
I remember you do dancing.
I do move around.
Yeah.
I get, yeah, I am oddly nimble.
That's a good description, I think, of my nimbleness.
It's odd.
You built a mini ramp in your backyard, right?
Don't you have a mini?
I did.
That's so cool.
Have you ever seen that?
I've seen mini ramps here,
because I watch X Games and stuff.
Of him skating.
Oh no, no, no.
He'll have, he'll have.
No, you skate?
I do.
I didn't, I'm not a real ramp skater.
I use it more of a mode of transportation.
All through my teen years, I was skating all over the city.
Oh, you mean for real? Yeah. That is no longer there. We took it down
because there were too many, there was a lot of beefing.
Wait, what's going on? Oh, there was just a couple injuries and
I was like, enough of this crazy wacky thing. It's not right. I do enjoy it, but I also
am not good at it.
Let's be honest.
Well, you can drop down.
I think that's the hardest thing, dropping down.
I cannot drop down.
Can you drop up?
Here's what I do.
I start in the middle and I go back and forth
until I fall down.
Can we just say it's dropping in?
You know this, right?
Drop, drop in.
Correct.
Yeah, it's not dropped out.
Excuse me, Nigel Houston.
Well, here's what's funny about you.
You horagomi here, fucking Tommy.
This guy used to claim that he skated.
Remember that?
Remember that whole fucking lie that he perpetuated?
Tony Hawk taught me how to ollie, it's online.
Wait a second, can you ollie?
I can now because Tony taught me it's online.
Yes, I can.
It's online.
That's one step before. And get an inch up. Look at me
Look at my ponytail, but I want to watch this right now. Yeah, please. Yeah. Yeah, let's not watch that right now
Okay, so anyway
But you but you know how to go back and forth like the thing I can go back and forth and I can do a couple
Kind of spinner ooze, but I cannot even ollie dude. We'll get you there. I can't kick flip. I did a whole
video of me yelling at people to do a kick flip and it was a lot of fun to yell at people and
watch them do kick flips but I felt like a hypocrite because I cannot kick flip. I can't even ollie.
You can't kick flip without knowing how to fucking ollie Jack. You gotta walk before you can run.
Exactly dude. So yeah if if afterwards, if you,
do you have a couple decks here?
You didn't bring your board, did you?
No, I don't really have.
I see a board, but it doesn't have any wheels on it.
I got rid of all my boards, yeah.
I used to use them for art, but no longer.
Yeah, that skateboard, that was given us,
what, a fan did that as a gift.
We've got some, if you look around the room,
actually, all of this is fan art.
Everything's been given to us from-
Oh nice, it looks like there's some AI art back there.
Oh that's a real, oh that one?
Yeah, the one-
No, that's my brother who lives in India.
No.
Okay.
Let me just say something, I am very gullible.
I believe everything that is told to me.
I never go fuck you, but yeah, you're right.
AI, you got it. I did that was AI
You got it man. I want I don't know Andrew space prince from India
Yeah, I'd only be offended Jack but may I say something that might be you mean I mean I don't want I want to be myself
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and I want to be real with you. Do you mind if Bobby's real with you go straight at me? I want to go straight at you. Um, I appreciate you
Uh-huh. Yeah, here it comes. No, there's no comment man. Right? Yeah, you said I appreciate
Well, I appreciate you. I mean and I don't want you feel we're a fan big fan throw that out there
But I think you've helped me sexually, I'll tell you why.
Oh, all right.
This is all good so far.
It's great.
I was ready for the butt.
No, no, no, I'm grateful for it.
And?
I get really emotional about it.
But I think that like, you know,
I know I'm littler than you, smaller, right?
But I feel like we're in the same range
of body types almost.
Yes.
Yeah.
Let me finish.
On a spectrum.
On a spectrum, yeah, yeah, yeah.
His is more evolved, I'd say.
I'm rocking about 250 right now.
I've been stuck here for years.
Where are you at, where are you at?
I'm at 180.
One? You're in the one? Yeah. Ah, you're not even are you at? I'm at 180. One?
You're in the one?
Yeah.
Ah, you're not even in the same universe as me, bro.
Yeah, yeah.
But women have got, like I've got with girls,
and they go, I like that Jack Black look.
Oh man.
You know what I mean?
And in my mind, I'm like,
I always get on my hands and knees.
And I go, thank you so much, Jack Black.
I'm not praying to you.
You are though.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I go, thank you for,
like he's paving the road
so I can get some nookie nook.
You know what I mean?
So I appreciate it.
That's all I'm saying.
You paved the road to Pussy Town.
That's basically what you've done.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So thank you so much for that.
That might be the highest compliment I've ever received.
I don't know if you know this,
but Jack Black is a subcategory on Pornhub.
If you search Jack Black on it.
No.
Oh yeah.
Really? There's a crew of guys that look like Jack Black on there. Iategory on Pornhub. If you search Jack Black on it. No. Oh yeah. Really?
There's a crew of guys that look like Jack Black on there.
I am not gonna immediately search that
as soon as it's gonna be whatsoever.
Yeah.
I might Google, I might do that at Pornhub.
If somebody compares your body to Jack Black,
what would mine be compared, what's mine?
Oh fuck you.
I know what you're doing, it's gross.
What is it?
Oh you wanna say Tom Hardy?
Is it really? I guess, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Tom Hardy. I guess it you're doing. It's gross. What is it? Oh you want to say Tom Hardy?
I mean you you are I mean as a com for a comic I think you are yes, it's you're not Matt Rife
No, no, you're not Matt Rife or Jeff die. No, it's true, but you're like two below that maybe three
Yeah, but still still 15 above me
You mean so that's pretty good. Yeah, but yeah, you're. You know what I mean? So that's pretty good. It's pretty good. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But yeah, you're pretty hot.
People, women have said that.
No.
It's hot, your co-host is hot.
Yeah, hot tempered is really what it is.
Yeah, yeah.
Uppity and hot tempered.
But I will say, Jack, getting back to reality,
thank you for everything that you've done
in the world of comedy.
And you bring joy in a level that I think,
I've never once seen you and gone,
meh, no, I see you and I go,
oh yeah, that guy's fucking great.
Bro, I'll tell you the first time I saw you,
Yeah?
And it wasn't a huge part, right?
But I remember going, oh, that guy's good, right?
A movie called...
School of Rock.
No, DMW.
I don't think I'm in that movie.
Yeah, you're in that one.
Are you sure?
It's called Dead Man Walking.
Oh yeah!
Yeah, you're in that one.
DMW, dude.
He hates acronyms, we learned that earlier.
Yeah, I love acronyms, dude.
You gotta say them all out.
Yeah, yeah.
Dead Man Walking?
Dude, you play his brother.
Remember, he's about to get MGK.
That's what happened earlier.
Like, yeah, we had MGK in here a couple days ago,
and it was a funny story, and I was like, MGK.
He's like, machine gun, oh, if you would've said that,
I would've known.
But it was a serious scene in the movie, right,
where like your brother's dying, right?
He's on death row.
Yeah.
Jack, right?
Yeah, Sean Penn.
Sean Penn's your brother, right?
Yeah, yeah. He's the dead man walking. And right? Yeah, Sean Penn. Sean Penn's your brother, right?
Yeah, he's the dead man walking.
And then you guys are in, like, I remember distinctly,
you guys are in sort of a waiting room.
I think you were wearing a suit. I don't know.
Were you ever wearing a suit?
Yeah, it was like a Sears.
It was a cheap suit.
We, yeah, a low-income family.
And I was one of his little brothers. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There were three of us.
And I was so freaked out
because I love Sean Penn.
Ever since I saw Fast Times at Ridgemont High,
he's my favorite actor.
So good.
And weirdly, that was kind of the only comedy thing he did,
the very first movie.
And then he went hard into like drama.
Yeah, but Fast Fast Times, no one,
I mean, I know it's a specific character,
you know what I mean, it seems more sketchy,
like a sketch character almost,
but dude, because he's such a good actor,
it just makes it so much better because it's so believable.
Well, he never looked like that again,
which I thought was really wild.
Like he transformed, that stoner surfer thing
never was re-imagined by him,
which I thought was kind of wild.
After that, you never saw him look like that ever again.
Or was it the donut around his belly button
when he walks in?
Remember that?
Remember Fast Times?
I don't remember a donut in his belly button.
I think he walked into the room
with a donut in his belly button.
Aspicoli? Aspicoli. Am I not right or no? I don't think so. I don't think so donut in his belly. I think he walked into the room with a donut in his belly. Aspicoli?
Aspicoli.
Am I not right or no?
I don't think so.
Right there.
Or bagel.
Bagel, yeah.
That's tucked into his belly.
I'm sure that's a choice.
Mr. Hand.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
No one had captured that kind of stoner before him on film that I'm aware of.
And it was just such a brilliant, hilarious performance.
But anyway, so I had this little part as his little brother
and it was just a surreal experience.
And I got to watch him do his thing up close and personal.
And I was there on the day that he shot the scene
with Susan Sarandon.
In the jail.
In the jail.
Oh, my God.
It's the night before he's gonna get executed,
and he's just having this cathartic, like,
just explosive tears, and it's a confession.
He confesses to her.
It's the redemption part of it.
Yeah.
And then, obviously, you weren't shooting that day.
No.
You knew he was shooting that scene that day? Yeah. So, obviously you weren't shooting that day. No.
You knew he was shooting that scene that day?
Yeah.
So were they weird that you were coming or no?
No, I knew the director.
The director who also gave me my first part in showbiz,
Tim Robbins, was also the director of a theater company
called The Actors Gang.
And so I was tight with him, so he let me kind of,
you know, do scenes. Wow so I was tight with him, so he let me kind of, you know, scenes.
Wow.
I wanted to watch stuff.
Was he, now, let me, was he approachable,
Sean Penn, back then, or no?
He was approachable, but he was super method,
so he was kind of in character as this
kind of gnarly dude, drug-doin' madman
who partied hard. And I did hang with him,
but I have to admit I was a little scared of him
in the way that you might be scared of Wild Animal
where it's a little unpredictable.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
One time you're just talking and there's a funny story
about John Malkovich or something,
and then the next minute there's some kind of crazy
freeform poetry coming out of it
and then it's like wait are you gonna punch me in the face? Wait what's happening over there?
Is there a blowjob happening? Hey where am I? Do you still do you get intimidated still or no?
Like sometimes I'm like I get a little nervous. Yeah I get anxious. You get anxious? I get anxious. And you know when they say never meet your heroes?
I think never meet your heroes,
not because they're gonna do something weird,
but I act weird around them.
I don't do well.
If I have an option to meet them,
I usually will say pass.
I'd rather just enjoy their work from afar.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Also, you don't want them to be addicts,
then it'll forever change how you feel about them.
No?
I don't know, I mean.
I tell you my Thierry Henry story, right?
No.
You know who Thierry Henry is?
Soccer player?
Yeah.
It's my favorite soccer player, Jack.
Oh, really?
Even better than Pele?
It's French.
The way you say Pele, maybe not, but it's like,
Thierry Henry is a French soccer player
for my favorite team.
What's my favorite team, everybody?
Arsenal.
Arsenal FC, okay?
Legend.
I was shooting The Dictator.
It's Sasha's movie.
I had two lines.
I only have two lines.
But anyway, there are no small parts.
Thank you, Jack.
No, he does a lot of small parts, yeah. Two-Line Lee.
Honestly, yeah.
In the business, he's called Two-Line Lee.
Look at what he does with them, though.
Everybody loves him.
I don't know.
He makes a meal.
I make a meal.
So anyway, I'm in the elevator.
I can't believe I've never told this story.
No.
Oh my God.
All right, so I'm at the Trump Soho Hotel back there.
You have a residency there, right?
I'm a resident of the hotel.
Yeah, anyway.
That's what it's called.
It's called the Trump Hotel.
They've got a Lee floor.
Yeah.
We've got a Lee floor.
Yeah, there's a library.
33 for Lee.
Okay, so it's not, okay, so.
First of all, there's definitely not a library there.
Go on.
No, there was, okay, anyway.
I go in the elevator, the doors open.
And you go, so can I just say, because he's French
and he played for Arsenal, it's England,
it's like kind of running into Gandalf or Voldemort.
You know what I mean?
You never think you're gonna fucking run into them.
It's not like LA where, like, oh, there's Tom Cruise.
I mean, he, you know, or whatever, you know what I mean?
You never think, so when he walked in,
in my mind, I'm like, Gandalf there's Tom Cruise. I mean, I mean, he, you know, or whatever, you know what I mean? You never think. So when he walked in, in my mind, I'm like, Gandalf just walk, you know what I mean?
And then like, also, I'm like his biggest fan. And I fucking went, I shut down.
Like, like I was like, I didn't know what to say. And then he got off on his floor and I wanted to say things and I couldn't it was the first time where I was fucking starstruck.
So you never got to say hello?
I never said anything to the other guy. But it was better that way because if I fucking said something and he was a dick. Oh my God, it would have ruined it.
What would you have said anyway?
Let me be that guy.
What's his name?
Tierra Henry.
Tierra Henry.
Tierra, I am Tierra Henry.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Pardon me, I'm going to the elevator now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay, so let the music play in the elevator.
I'm not gonna go right away.
Cheery, hello. Cheery.
Hello?
Cheery.
I just, I just.
Are you talking to me?
I can't take the volume down.
I can't take the volume down.
Tum tum tum tum tum.
Ah.
Bonjour.
Tum tum tum tum tum.
I'm trying to turn, sorry to hear,
I'm trying to turn down the.
Tum tum tum tum tum.
Take all fucking shot.
Anyway.
Anyway.
With the volume on the elevator music
This elevator has a volume knob
This is crazy
Yeah, anyway, Terry dude, I'm a huge Arsenal fan and I'm a huge Arsenal fan and I can't believe, can I take a photo with you? Bing! Mr. Henry, your phone
I'm sorry, there is no time, it's weird to talk to people in the day there.
So goodbye.
Au revoir.
I fucked it up.
It doesn't matter.
Dude, no matter what you do in an elevator, as soon as you start talking to a stranger
in an elevator, you're off on the wrong foot because they feel trapped.
They're stuck with it.
They don't know who you are.
You could be a dangerous person.
Right, right, right, right.
Elevator conversations are so uncomfortable.
So that's why maybe I didn't say anything.
Here's the best thing to say.
I don't wanna be that guy, but...
I don't know.
Let me be that guy for a minute.
Every time, they say that every time.
A guy walked up to me on the phone in Scotland on FaceTime.
I was at a hotel on the phone with my wife.
The guy's on FaceTime, and he just jams his phone
in front of my face,
because he's on with a friend of his,
and I took everything inside of me
not to just take his phone and throw it as far as I could,
because it was crazy rude.
He was just like shoved it in my face.
Now, I think my generation of like, don't say anything, I'm just going to leave him alone. Now people don't give a shit at all. They'll shove a phone right in my face. Now, I think my generation of like, don't say anything, I'm just going to leave them
alone. Now people don't give a shit at all. They'll shove a phone right in your face. They'll record
you. It's crazy now. There's no rules. No rules. Yeah. There's no rules, but there's also no way
to win because if you throw the phone, you're an asshole. If you take the phone and play along
and talk to the stranger on the thing for the stranger,
then you're being a foolish person
because now you're getting stuck in a weird situation.
I always end up doing it.
I was like, okay, yeah, I'll talk to the person.
But if I'm late for a thing or I'm with someone
that's a friend or a family, I will kind of keep it short.
And just go, hey, man, it was the weirdest he like put it on my face.
I can't imagine you.
I mean, your face must have changed colors.
Yeah, I don't like that.
The key is the pivot.
How do you stick and move
so that it takes the least amount of time?
And that way, I think it's best to go high impact.
Give me that fucking phone.
What's up, you fucking asshole?
Love you, bye. Give them the experience and then move. What's up, you fucking asshole? Love you, bye.
Give them the experience and then move.
Write that down, high impact.
I'm gonna try that style.
Luke, can I try high impact?
I was the opposite.
He put it in my face, I go, come on, man.
And I walked away.
Can I try, can I try?
What are you doing?
Can I try high impact?
Yeah.
I wanna practice.
I think you're a little high impact anyway.
Right now?
Yeah, no, always.
Okay.
Do it, go for it.
Well, give me the phone, put the phone in my face.
Hey man, we talked to my buddy. I got it, yeah. No, always. Okay. Do it. Go for it. Well, give me the phone. Put the phone in my face. Hey, man, we talked to my buddy.
I got it! Yeah, yeah, yeah!
That's great.
See, I told you he was Asian.
Oh, right, right, right.
Here's the problem with what you did, Andrew.
It's, for me, if I do what you did,
and you're like, no, pass.
Thank you, but no thank you.
And I walk away. It stays with me.
Oh, yeah, no. I disappointed that person.
It'll fucking stick with me for days.
Sometimes weeks, I'll be like,
why was I such an asshole with that one person?
All I had to do was fucking with him.
So I will usually err on the side of give him something.
Give him a little something.
If it's appropriate, I always do,
but this was like drunk, rude,
shove a phone in my face.
I was like, come on, dude.
But you guys don't know what it's like being little though
Because then they could take more advantage. No what they do is pick you up last night. I was with a young lady
In her 30, she's 30 years old and why are we shooting guns just then?
Becoming more American
You know, I love deadwood and that's why I was doing that.
Is that what she calls your penis?
Go ahead.
No, but we have a Blue Chew.
Yeah, so...
Yeah, we do.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Throwing it in there.
So anyway, last night, eating dinner at Melrose Ramen.
It's great.
Ramen places, they close at 3 in the morning.
Whoa.
Really?
It's great. It's on Melrose. Party zone. Yeah, so it's a good place after stand up,
you know if you're hungry, go with it.
Anyway, after last call, they know what they're doing.
They know exactly what they're doing.
Thank you, Jack.
So I'm sitting there and a guy comes up from behind me
and puts me in like a headlock.
Because I know this guy, the internet or whatever.
I'm like, yeah, yeah.
And he kind of does like a noogie noogie thing, right?
And because I'm little, they think that they can do it,
which they can.
No, they can't.
And I don't want anybody to talk.
Nobody ever touch my best friend ever again, that's enough.
No more headlocking.
It's not nice.
Or after a show, if I'm in the South,
people will pick me up.
I know, I've seen it.
Hey, my little fucking guy right here, man.
Hello kitty, man, come here. Right they'll pick me up like I'm a little
fucking statue. They simba him. They go, ahhhhhhh.
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Yeah, they go, hey man, good comedy, woo hoo!
Look at my little guy, you know what I mean?
I fucking hate it, hey man, good comedy. Woo hoo, my little guy. You know what I mean, I fucking hate it.
Yeah.
Anyway.
You know that I get some of that too.
They don't lift me up, they get a hernia,
but I know that feeling of familiarity
and part of it is our fault
because we got a similar good times energy.
Yeah.
We send that out to the universe.
That's why we have some of our successes
because that comes through in what we do.
And that's a blessing and a curse.
Good times, energy.
You don't have good times, energy.
No.
You have bad times, energy sometimes.
Bad times.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
Very bad times.
Grim almost.
Dark.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But why can't you be more silly, like Jack and I?
Because we're good times people.
It's not in my nature.
It's not?
There's yin and yang in the universe.
Ah.
You're yang, I'm yin.
No, we're more yin, you're yang.
No, I'm yin, you're yang.
Is yang white or black?
I don't know, look it up, which one's yin
and which one's yang?
I wanna know what the color is.
We're overpowering the dark side here.
I'm messing with the balance of power
of your yin and yang right now.
Oh yeah, you are. Yang is, yang is white. Yeah. So I'm, I'm yang. Yeah, we're more yin of power of your yin and yang right now. Oh yeah, you are.
Yang is, yang is white.
Yeah.
So I'm, I'm yang.
Yeah, we're yang.
We're yang.
We're yang.
Oh yeah.
No, you guys are, you guys are more full moon.
Okay.
Full moon.
Uh huh.
When yin, when yin is the strongest.
Okay.
You ever been to yang chow?
Is that on Melrose?
Is that Chinese restaurant?
Yeah. In Chinatown. It's so good. Here. In LA. Okay. You ever been to Yang Chao? Is that on Melrose? Is that a Chinese restaurant?
Yeah, in Chinatown.
Here, in LA.
Slippery Shrimp.
Yeah, here in LA.
Slippery Shrimp?
Yeah, that was my name in high school.
It's not a good name because it's not slippery.
It's kind of crunchy and sweet.
Mm.
Is it spicy?
A little bit, a little bit.
There it is, Slippery Shrimp.
I love Slippery Shrimp.
It's so yummy.
I love myself some Slippery Shrimp.
What's your bad boy meal?
What's your like, oh, I can't wait to go get Nottie
and overeat this.
I mean, look, a cheeseburger is the best sandwich
in the world and that is my bad boy meal with some fries.
You got a spot?
Yeah, what's your favorite smash burger right now?
You know what?
I'm gonna come out and say, I'm not into smash burgers.
They're smashed, so the question,
this is the eternal question.
I can't believe we still have to ask this question.
Where's the beef?
Where's the beef?
It's been smashed out of it.
It's mostly char.
It's mostly fried char and the beef is in there,
but it's smashed.
I like a big fat juicy burger.
Yes.
Well, you're a Fuddruckers guy.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
It closed, Jack.
Or actually, this is not the fattest burger there is,
but my favorite burger, it's obviously the apple pan.
Mm, my favorite.
Oh, I've been to apple pan.
Apple pan's great.
I used to live next door to there.
Oh, it's on Pico, right?
Is it Pico?
Yep.
Westwood and Pico.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Been there, done that, I agree.
But may I have an argument, please?
You gotta rebuttal.
I gotta do the rebuttal, okay?
We talking fries well done, Jack?
Of course.
And do you get a slice of pie a la mode afterwards?
I do if I'm feeling nasty.
I do every time.
Dude, you know what the real weird thing is?
If you go a hickory cheeseburger and the tuna sandwich,
but you split that in half with a friend.
Oh my God.
So you're sensible.
This is hot.
Oh, I didn't even know you could do that.
And then I like to take them extra well done fries
and get a little bit of scoop of tuna and ketchup.
Oh, I didn't know that they had that.
Have you ever thought about doing a Jack Black's restaurant?
I should do a restaurant.
I did think about it for a minute.
At the peak of like Kung Fu Panda and Nacho Libre.
I was like, I could do a fusion restaurant.
Kung Fu Nachos?
Nacho Panda.
But then I thought about it.
I was like, wait, do I really want those flavors together?
The sweet and sour taco?
Yeah.
Yeah, dude.
Maybe.
Nacho Panda.
I mean, fucking Danny Trejo does it. Okay is that is that Danny trail? It's my daddy trail
You know, but it's on brand for Danny trail here Mexican. Yeah, you can pull off a Mexican restaurant and do it
Well, he also has a Chinese restaurant out to to be no he does not
Can I do my fucking counter-argument God
Do it thank you so much Jack
All right, so I'll tell you why smash burgers number one. Okay. Yeah, you want a thick fucking pieces meat in there, right?
What happens it bleeds into the fucking bun and now you got this bloody bun, right that you have to fucking chew
It's like it's a soak. It's so key. It's muddy interesting. All right
Yeah, but a smash burger doesn't have a lot of juices that come out right, right? It's also more compact. It's better to hold It's muddy. Interesting. All right? But a Smashburger doesn't have a lot of juices that come out. Right.
It's also more compact.
It's better to hold.
It's like you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Where's your favorite?
Well, let me tell you something right now, Jack.
I'm glad you asked.
Okay.
Right now, I go to HiHo.
HiHo.
Have you heard of it?
It sounds like maybe there's some fusion in there.
Is there some Korean flavors on there?
No, no, no, no.
Oh, okay.
No, yeah. Why do they call it HiHo no, no, no. Okay. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Why do they call it Hi-Ho?
That was the guy's name.
Oh, okay. Oh, no, it is because I'll tell you why, because it's the owner of Sugarfish.
Yeah.
Maybe his name's just Ho, and you say, Hi-Ho.
Hi-Ho.
Oh, maybe, maybe. So that, so I go there, and then-
He's the owner of Sugarfish.
Yeah.
Yeah, same guy.
There's gotta be some fusion in their Japanese burger.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe.
Those are fish fries.
Yeah, the umami's definitely in it.
And let me say something else, okay?
Then I also go to heavy-handed now.
You go to heavy-handed?
Dude, I'm going straight to high-ho.
You gotta go there, dude.
It's pretty good.
It's so good.
I like all that lettuce and stuff in there.
Yeah.
Ooh.
It's so good, dude.
And so, you know, next time when you eat this, then we'll have the discussion, you know what I mean?
But I think that without you eating this, Jack,
you don't even know what you're talking about.
Are there pickles?
Yes, please.
He knows what he's talking about.
And also, Andrew, can I say this?
Last thing about HiHo.
I'm not there.
I have nothing to do with the fucking company.
Maybe it's a Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs reference, though.
HiHo.
HiHo.
It's off the burger go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So anyway, go there.
And also, can I say something?
This is the first restaurant where the photo
looks like the thing.
Ah, yeah.
Can I say another thing though?
When I do go, I'll probably walk there
and back to walk off all the extra calories.
How many steps to walk off a high-ho?
A lot.
A lot.
How many calories in a high-ho burger?
I actually want to find out.
At least 12,000 steps.
Really?
I never look at calories.
We know you don't.
That's a big issue.
I will say this though.
Yeah.
Oh, that's only three or four.
Some of the best burgers I've ever had
at Mexican restaurants.
Hamburguesa.
Hamburguesa.
They got the flavor that a lot of Mexican cooks,
they put the seasonings in there that taste extra good.
Hamburguesa.
Hamburguesa.
There's a place called Yuccas, little taco stand.
Yeah.
But guess what?
What?
Got a great cheeseburger in there.
No, at Yucca's.
My favorite burger in LA is only because it's
nostalgic for me, but there's a place on the west side
where Venice meets the water called Hanano.
Do you know about Hanano?
You, oh, I don't know if you said that earlier or if he said that, but Hanano. Do you know about Hanano? You, oh, I don't know if you said that earlier,
if he said that, but Hanano is an old cafe
right on the water almost, and Jim Morrison
used to play there, he used to live around the corner.
It's got wood chips all over the floor still.
One of those old school bars.
Oh my God, you don't like the doors?
Big deal.
What?
Jim Morrison used to play there?
Yeah, so Morrison used to live around the corner from there in Venice, and I guess he
would walk there.
Look and see if you can get the inside of that place.
It's awesome.
It's still got wood chips on the ground like the old bars used to.
Yeah, but when you go to a hot dog stand, you see a photo of Barack Obama eating the
hot dog.
It doesn't do anything for me.
That's all.
Let's just move on.
I would think it's probably a good hot dog.
Probably, probably, probably.
He's not going to mess around with substandard hot dogs.
And then go to, if you-
Wait, wait, stay on that photo.
Stay on that photo real quick, all right?
Diversity of the time.
Already I like the hamburger
because look at that guy.
Look at that guy.
He loves it.
He loves it.
Yeah, yeah.
So on the other side of the bar is where the bands
still play, they still have music there at night.
See there where the pool table is.
Go to that fifth picture down or whatever.
You can see there's a pool table.
So bands play in that corner there.
And it's like an old surf.
But the best part is, the reason I like this is,
it's always been a cheap, affordable burger.
We used to live on the West side.
And there is no kitchen.
They cook the burger right next to the taps.
So there's a flat top grill next to the taps.
So that's where you get your burger from.
Right there, there it is.
Right when you walk in,
Wow.
He's slinging them right out front.
It's the best. And this is back when it was before Jim Morrison
was in the doors.
He would go in there and just like do open mic night?
No, no, no.
There was nights when he was with the doors.
He would go play.
The doors played that hamburger?
No.
Jim would play by himself there.
Would go play.
You can go ask him too. They'll talk about it.
Look, there's an original picture of Venano
from back in the day.
How does he play by himself?
He just sings.
He would just sing and play guitar. Yeah.
That's what they said. He would show up there and just sing.
Now, whether that's local lore, I don't care.
They don't have any evidence? They don't have photographic evidence?
No, there's pictures of Jim at the bar. But I mean, I don't know if that's true, but I like it.
Even if it's not, I don't give a shit. I like it. If he hung out there even, I was like, that's kind of fucking rad.
And he was already a rock star, you're saying.
He would also do that.
Yeah, already famous, yeah.
He didn't need to perform for free cheeseburgers.
I'm sure he was, if we're being honest,
I'm sure he was probably fucked up out of his mind.
Yeah.
That he was going there just to like,
rail one out and play.
And then ironically enough, or coincidentally,
when I moved from the West Side to West Hollywood,
I lived next door to Jim Morrison's last known residence
on Norton Avenue in West Hollywood.
I like the doors.
I did this just to find out.
I really do. I just thought about it.
I did this to find out if you like the doors.
There's lots of people that don't like the doors.
I don't know what it is,
but they do rub people the wrong way.
I'm on the camp that the doors rule.
They fucking rock.
I love the doors. Also, Phil Manzarek, is that the doors rule. They fucking rock. Of the doors.
Also Phil Manzarek, is that the piano?
Yup, close enough, close enough.
What is it?
Manzarek.
Yeah, Phil Manzarek.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ray Manzarek.
Ray, that was the Phil that was the right one.
Ray Manzarek, right, because he did the bass lines as well on the keyboards, right?
Yeah.
You were thinking of like Phil Collins combo.
Who were you thinking of?
I don't know, I got nervous.
Phil Manzarek.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, he does, there's no bass player.
He gets the bass on his keyboards.
Amazing.
So cool.
So fucking cool.
And the thing about The Doors too,
Jim Morrison had the best voice, best screaming.
Like he could sing better than anyone
of his generation, I would say.
You probably are one of the best scream singers too.
You're very good.
Thank you.
I'm no Jim Morrison, but I can get up there.
When did you kind of discover this love of music
and performing that you had?
Like beyond the acting stuff, the music thing,
was that your first love?
I loved getting up on a stage and getting attention
and ham and cheese and doing theatrics
when I was a little kid.
Loved putting on a show from as far back as I can remember.
Music, I liked it, like listening to it,
but I didn't really get into singing until later,
till like high school, when I got into the musical theater,
because those were the good opportunities
to get up on stage.
And I was singing in a little show called Pippin.
Did you hear about Pippin?
1970s musical.
And I remember auditioning to get into Pippin and singing,
and I had to really like scrape the pan,
is what they call it. When you get up to the top of your voice, and you and I had to really like scrape the pan is what they call it.
When you get up to the top of your voice and you kind of got a yeah!
Get up there and like there's a little bit of distortion in your vocal pipes.
And I remember there was a girl who was auditioning right after me and she the way she looked
at me when I scraped the pan no one had ever looked at me like that before and I was like
I think I like this music.
Oh she looked at you in a ooh la la.
It was a different, yes, there was a thing.
I love ooh la la.
Don't you love ooh la la?
Everybody likes ooh la la.
That's one of my favorite vibes.
You're Mr. Ooh La La.
I mean, that wasn't the only reason.
I do love music and I love doing it,
but there was something about that audition
that changed things.
You had the thing.
Maybe I had a little something.
Maybe I had something I could work with.
It's surprising you never did stand up.
Yeah, no stand up for me.
Probably better than it.
What?
He's better than it.
I know he's better than it, but I'm just saying.
It's a low rent art.
It's a low rent art.
It's a low rent art.
It's a low, it's hanging fruit.
It's low rent art.
You know what it is, it's writing.
And I do like to improvise.
I've done a lot of improv classes
and some improv in some of the sketches I've done,
but the best improvisers are, like, really good writers.
And those stand-up comedians, you got to be a real writer,
and I don't really think of myself that way.
I do.
I do, too.
I mean, you never thought about trying it?
I have thought about it because I've been around it a lot.
When me and Kyle were doing Tenacious D, we would go and play these clubs and all these
brilliant standups would go up there.
But it takes a kind of courage.
And I always liked having that security blanket of being a part of a team.
And if it went sideways, I could always say it was his fault and having the guitars and the music was also
It was it was our
Thing that set us apart from the other comedy acts, but also maybe secretly a little bit of a crutch
It's like I would get the music here. It I don't know that we all have a crush though. We all have our crutches
Yeah, we all I do the same things. Oh, I think sometimes you're the things that you think these are like little devices that I've created
To save a set when I was I was I just did a show with bird at not Savannah, Georgia
I forgot where we were I don't remember. I know cuz you weren't there you're in the south
Well, we I was in the south you called me right and so big big Jay or yeah, I told you I bombed right
Yeah, so big Jay Okerson. It is about 10,000 people in the audience.
Yeah.
Big Jay Okerson has the set of the night.
Destruction.
And also in the South, and that's his people.
What does that even mean?
He's from Baltimore.
I know.
He speaks their language.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's like a kind of like a filthy white.
Can I say filthy white?
You know what I mean? He's not clean white. He's not Joe Malaney. Yeah, he's a filthy white. Can I say filthy white? You know what I mean?
He's not clean white, he's not Joe Malaney.
Yeah, he's a filthy white.
He's a filthy white, all right.
I don't think he'd be offended if I said that, right?
I'm a filthy yellow.
He's a great white.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's a great white.
Killing it, and I'm literally,
I turn to LeAnn, Bert's wife, and I go,
I'm gonna struggle.
And she goes, no, you're fine, sweetie, love you.
It's all about love, these audiences. I go, I'm gonna struggle. And she goes, no, you're fine, sweetie, love you. It's all about love, these audiences.
I go, I'm gonna struggle.
And I hear my name come up, I'm gonna struggle.
And I go up there, and dude, I struggle.
Oh shit, and then I started doing, you know,
I have a bag of tricks.
Bag of tricks.
Right, so this is one of my, I don't wanna reveal it,
but I'm gonna do it.
Do it. One of my bag of tricks is I of tricks. Right, so this is one of my, I don't want to reveal it, but I'm going to do it. Do it.
One of my bag of tricks is I'll do three minutes and if somebody sits down, like when they
went to the bathroom, I'll go, fuck, where were you?
And they're like, I went to the bathroom.
I go, I gotta start over.
So I'll leave the stage, I'll run out and then restart my set doing the same jokes.
And that usually kills.
It did worse than the original joke.
They were like, we see through it.
That's almost as they said that.
We see through your little antics, your little tricks.
I did it all.
What could you have done?
Nothing.
I bombed.
What do you do when you're in a situation
when you guys aren't being well received?
Ah.
No, they're always well received.
No, there have been a couple times, but especially if you're going and playing festivals where
there's a hundred thousand people there that really came to see, you know, Metallica or
whoever, you got to win some people over.
And what I do is I, the mantra is don't forget to pretend to have a good time.
Because if you just stay in that,
just keep on like pretending like you're loving it
and enjoying it, eventually you will start to,
and then they'll, that's the hope and the dream,
and then they'll pick up on that energy
and they'll start to enjoy it too.
Because if you're suffering and you're, what did you say, struggling?
Struggling, yeah.
It's like, yeah, there's blood in the water.
There's blood in the water.
They can sense it. They're like an animal.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They can see your fear.
Yeah, I tell people when they're doing the Tonight Show, I go,
so because I saw I'm not going to name the name.
Can I just whisper it? Yeah, do that.
Back in the day, I think before I did stand up,
I saw Can I just whisper it? Yeah, do that. Back in the day, I think before I did stand up,
I saw who we love do the Tonight Show
and he didn't do well. Even as a non-stand up at the time,
I went, oh shit, this guy's a legend, he's not doing well.
Live TV's so hard.
Right, so when I'm, so what I tell you, I can do this.
Yeah, you're going.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's crazy.
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So anyway, um, but when I saw young come back, I go just you're on TV. They can sweeten it. You
know what I mean? Just pretend you're killing smile. You know what I mean? If you're eating,
you know, we know that at clubs, you know, bombing, you know what I mean? Just kind of give us the
same things. Yeah.
I shouldn't even said any of that, right?
Because it's just like you already said it.
No, it's good.
Now I look like a fool.
You do not.
I wasn't listening at all because I was thinking
the next thing I was going to say.
Go ahead, cut to it.
Because the truth is, no matter what like your approach is,
if you have a technique of what to do,
mantras don't really work because you go,
okay, don't forget the thing.
To always do the thing.
The thing is always gonna be different every show.
It's not the same.
But what I've noticed is, like, we'll have a great show,
and then we'll have a bad show, and after the bad show,
I usually have a good one the next one
because I'll usually be like, you know what?
I was trying too hard.
It's always, it's my number one problem is trying too hard.
And I go, this next time, I'm not gonna try too hard.
I'm gonna kind of act, this sounds horrible,
I'm gonna kind of phone it in a little bit.
If you phone it, you throw it away,
you don't care as much.
That's when the magic happens.
I have another couple of questions for you.
All right, it's about acting.
Yeah. Real quick.
Yeah. Real quick, okay.
How do you do it?
No, no, no.
No?
When you're in a scene and you're in the background,
not that, like you're not in the background,
but there's a wide shot, right?
And you're supposed to have a conversation with somebody.
Do you do what I do?
I'm sure there's a better technique,
but you say watermelon a thousand times.
Is that something that you do
or do you just kind of improv?
I always go.
Yeah, cheese and potatoes.
That's the cheese and potatoes.
I mean, it is it is some of the hardest shit when you're not supposed to be
pulling focus, but you don't want to be a
a strange creature that's not human back there.
So yeah. How do you how do you act in the background?
There should be a class on it.
What do I do with my hands?
And then let me ask you another question.
When you're tongue tied, you know what I mean?
You have a big thing, chunky thing you have to say.
And you're tongue tied.
Does this work?
This works for me.
Red leather, yellow leather.
Well, that's one of the many things you can there. I have a bunch of them
I know how to do it a big black bug bit a big brown bear
Geese cattle cattle low crows car cocks crow eight great geese in a green field grazing
Like I can go on hours. Keep doing it. I want to see them all. Six thick thistle sticks. Lucy likes light literature.
Amos Ames, the amiable aeronaut,
aided in an aerial enterprise at the age of 88.
Some shun sunshine, do you shun sunshine?
Fine white wine vinegar with veal.
Did you memorize that or are you just improvising that?
I memorized it way back in my 20s.
Whoa, dude.
I'm a theater student. Whoa, do you know how to do any of those? No, I'm not a good that. I memorized it way back in my 20s. Whoa, dude. The theater student.
Whoa, do you know how to do any of those?
No, I'm not a good actor.
Yeah, yeah.
Let me try to improvise on maybe.
Can I challenge myself?
Some shun sunshine.
Do you shun sunshine?
That's good.
Ricardo Valenzuela is off the hockey stick.
No.
No, that's not working.
Ricardo Valenzuela? Yeah, yeah. Ricardo Valencia. Yeah, yeah.
La Valencia Hotel is incognito with John Smith.
This is just coming through you?
Yeah, it's coming through me. I'm like channeling.
Yeah. Right. Yeah.
Montgomery Ward is within each other's hemisphere,
creating lots of dozens of laughs.
Oh, man. Yeah. What do you think?
You're just letting it spill now.
I can tell that's just coming off the top of your dung.
Dude, I'm like channeling it, dude.
I don't need to memorize it.
Especially because Montgomery Ward
hasn't been around in like 30 years.
Department stores that are out of commission,
that's amazing.
Is that what it is?
Montgomery Ward?
I never even heard of it before.
I just channeled it.
Used to be a department store.
I channeled it, dude.
Yeah, that's amazing.
I've never been sighted.
That's something from San Diego youth there popping up.
What do you mean, bud?
That was the mall, at the mall.
Oh, at the mall.
Montgomery Ward at the mall.
Yeah, Montgomery Ward, yeah, yeah.
That was an actual place, huh?
Mm-hmm.
Pretty cool, dude.
Dude, the channeling was incredible.
Thank you so much.
Channel again.
Channel again.
Channel again.
Channel again.
Channel again.
Channel again.
Channel again.
Channel again.
Channel more.
Channel.
Channel.
Alastair Montgomery.
Channel. Channel. Channel. Channel. Channel. Channel. where it doesn't create nothing but eyesores. Whoa!
What do you think?
Channel again.
Channel more. Channel!
Alastair Montgomery and the Skyline
creating algorithms within each other's foot.
Montgomery came out again, though.
As soon as there's your repeater, I think it kills the...
I fucked it. I fucked it. I fucked it.
You're right. I fucked it. I fucked it.
I can't channel anymore. It's dead.
All right. Let me try.
You can't go double Montgomery. Channel. it. Yeah, yeah. I can't channel anymore. It's dead. All right, let me try. You can't go double Montgomery.
Channel.
My father never loved me.
Is that... that's the same thing?
It's not the same thing.
Keep going! Keep going! More channeling!
Okay.
Why didn't he love me?
Why... why did you never come to any of my baseball games?
I just wanted to see your face.
Good, that was good.
Wow.
I don't think you should do that on set though.
No?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that'd be weird.
Someone's like, man, you can't get your lines right.
I'm like, one second.
Yeah.
Daddy!
Wait, is this an acting exercise?
This helps you be a better actor if you channel good right before you go out to act?
I think so.
That's the right guy.
That's the right guy.
It's kind of cool. It's like you're flushing out the clogs in your emotions.
You got to shake out all the bullshit.
Can I try? Yeah, go ahead.
All right.
Fuck a shakalicka ding dong.
Why do I live in a world of dreams?
The space is infinite.
If you go to the end, you'll see the devil.
No, you won't, he doesn't exist.
That's what he wants you to think.
Cock!
Wow, dude!
You know the channel too!
It just got very, very good, dude.
I don't know what just happened.
Whoa.
Did I say words?
Yeah, that was incredible.
It definitely didn't end with cock, I'll tell you that.
That was fucking incredible. Wow. Do you ever, I'll tell you that. That was fucking incredible.
Wow.
Do you ever, I feel like you don't, what are you doing?
I was trying to see my channel.
Yeah, can you channel it?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Are you channeling?
Yeah, yeah.
Machine tire wind dropping turbulence,
waves crashing, penis pain.
There it is. Dude, so good. That's what I'm talking about. Ooh. Waves crashing penis pain
So good
Can all
Shamalala ding-dong algorithm
Wrong way to channel you think that was said algorithm or they're already? Yeah. Oh, he's not allowed to channel any of the
YouTube. I felt like Shamalama ding dong. I kind of covered that too.
Yeah, you covered that too. So can you do your own channel? Channel
hack. I think we just learned channel hack. You're not real,
dude. That's really true.
You have the ability, dude.
I didn't know Jack did Shamalama the ding dong.
It's also, it wasn't Shamalama ding dong.
There was a ding and a dong, but I think the Shamalama
was all you.
I don't think this is fair for us to be telling him
he can't channel the way.
If part of his channeling is stealing our channels,
not just channel.
I know, but it just doesn't feel creative to me.
It feels like a channel thief. Yeah, you're a channel theme.
But to be, let's be fair, the channeling
is for you to do alone in your trailer
right before Martin Scorsese calls you to the set.
Wow.
This is something that Leo DeKalb will do
before his Oscar-winning performance
in Vagant, Once Upon a Time Hollywood 2.
Yeah.
Yeah. I love that movie.
So you know what, you're right.
I made fun of you just now.
You're not a channel, you're a basic guy.
No, just let's be real.
You're a basic guy with basic-
Be nice.
I'm being nice.
Be nice.
You're basic, you know what I mean?
You're like pumpkin spies, like the white girls.
You know what I mean?
You have your routine during the day.
You know what it is?
He's got more balance in his life again.
How many days sober now?
What are we talking?
We're at like,
we're at like nine months around there.
Wait, no, more like six.
The clapping's not there.
That's how I know he's not.
But there's something awry.
Oh no, it's because I'm not going to meetings.
I'm not keeping track.
Well, you go from nine months to six months.
That's a three month gap there.
It's a big gap.
It's a summer.
I was trying to remember what month it was right now.
Because you usually, I'm sorry, I don't mean an argument.
And congratulations, by the way.
But my point being is that because I count days, you know exactly what day you know how many days
It's yeah. Yeah when you're going nine months, I mean six months. It's a little weird cuz I'm not happy about it
I'm not like thrilled about being sober right now
Right like I'm not counting would be good or a fucking meeting
That is definitely the solution is to go to a meeting
Okay, let's move on that. Anyway, you look great though.
Congratulations, give Carlos a round of applause.
He's still talking about it, talking about it.
You're wonderful.
Hey, you're alive.
That's all that matters, right guys?
Thank you, Jeff. That is true.
So can we talk about Borderlands or no?
Yeah, let's talk about it.
Oh yes, the reason I'm here.
Yes.
Yeah.
Just kidding, I've always wanted to be on your show.
The movie that you guys did,
We have a three-way connection, right?
You did the film together.
Correct.
One of my closest friends is a producer on the movie.
So when he told me, she told me he was gonna get the role
or they were gonna, whatever, you know.
I auditioned, I auditioned.
And it was a cool, I was like, I knew before he knew.
It was kind of a sweet little nugget of life.
And I was like, oh, this is amazing.
And then it's opened his world to all these great people.
And it's just been a,
I saw the trailer looks fucking amazing.
I saw it before they put it out,
which I thought was really cool, but it looks rad.
What's a bummer about it though,
is because I, you know, when I found out you're in it,
but then I realized you're not gonna be there.
Oh, so you were out in Bulgaria going,
where the fuck is Jack Black?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then I realized, oh, he's Clap Trap.
This is bullshit.
But we still kind of work together.
Yeah, we did one table read.
I remember that day.
A Zoom table.
Yeah, but you crushed it.
And can I tell you what happened when we had that table?
Can I tell you what happened?
Yeah.
All right, so Jack, I wanna be vulnerable
and I wanna be, you know,
because I know sometimes people think I'm cool.
Hmm.
That I got my shit together, like, oh yeah,
he's got all the, you know.
There you are though.
That's incredible, look, zoom in.
There he is.
You had the smallest picture, but thanks for putting it on. Dude, made the poster. Yeah, I made the poster. That's incredible, look zoom in. There he is. Yeah the smallest picture, but thanks for putting it on.
Dude, made the poster.
Yeah, I made the poster.
That's fucking huge.
It's amazing, fucking amazing.
So here's, so.
Who's the guy in the middle?
Who's that guy in the dead center?
Kevin Hart.
Kevin Hart.
That's Kevin Hart.
That's right, with the beret.
Like you've never seen him before.
Wow.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Special Forces beret.
Edgar Ramirez is a lot of, so anyway,
I get the movie, and Jack, I'll be honest with you,
I've never been in a movie with that,
this kind of cast before.
Caliber of stars.
Yeah, it's just stacked, right?
Yeah.
And I, let me be vulnerable.
Yeah.
I'm nervous as fuck, let's be honest.
Yeah.
Yeah, I don't know if you're remembering me,
I'm real nervous.
Yeah.
You thought you might lose the job
over the Zoom performance? Exactly, exactly, exactly. Not a chance. So me. I'm real nervous. Yeah. You thought you might lose the job over the Zoom
performance?
Exactly, exactly.
Not a chance.
So this is what happens, OK?
Yeah.
Chance, by the way.
Yeah, yeah.
There's a chance.
So what happens is Eli's assistant or something calls
me and goes, hey, dude, there's not
going to be a lot of people to table read at the Zoom.
I go, OK.
He goes, I'm going to text you a list of characters
that you're going to be playing, as well list of characters that you're gonna be playing,
as well as the character that you're doing.
So I go, okay, and it's like 20 names.
Right, so now I'm panicking, like,
I could get fired from so many different angles now.
Right, so for days, bro, highlight,
even the, you know what I mean, the sergeant,
or whatever, right?
And I'm trying to memorize everything
and their point of view or whatever, whatever.
Different sounding voices.
Different sounding voices.
I have to kill here.
This is my shot.
So when we get on Zoom,
I'm there five minutes earlier
and I'm looking at all the boxes.
There's so many boxes.
And in my mind I was like,
I don't know if I'm playing 20 parts, I'm just,
you know what I mean?
It seems like there's, right?
And I'm glad I did this.
Two minutes before we're about to start,
I text the guy again, I go,
are you sure about these 20 names?
He goes, oh no, I forgot to tell you,
you're only doing two.
Oh my God.
So if I hadn't called,
I would have been interrupting somebody.
Yeah.
You would have been interrupting 18 people.
I know.
Thank God.
I mean, would that have been bad?
Oh yeah.
I think that would have been bad.
I'll tell you what was bad though,
is that they made you rehearse 20 different roles,
and really it was only two that you had to rehearse.
Yeah, that was mean.
Because you put in some hours, it sounds like,
and some stress, lost a little sleep. They owe me money, is what you're saying put in some hours. It sounds like and some stress lost a little sleep
They owe me money as we're saying. Okay. Yeah
We're talking about here do get a lawyer. Yeah, I know yeah, it was stressful, but you know, it's fine
I don't tell you what when I found out you were in it
I was like that's rad and they're lucky we are lucky to have you on that movie because you're fucking hilarious
Oh god bless you can relax about the worrying about getting canned they yeah, they're thanking their lucky stars cuz you're killing it
Yeah, yeah, it was also just a very positive experience. I'll tell you that right now
You know what has currency that people don't really realize if you like kill it in like a social media post
That has just as much if not more like power in the industry
than like having a zippy cameo in a major motion picture.
If you fucking crush it like you do on the regular
on social media, on like podcasts
or on like interviews and other people's shit,
that stuff counts a lot.
Yeah, but Jack, I'm glad you said that.
A lot of eyeballs, a lot of clicks.
Jack, I appreciate that, but,
and I'll tell you the difference between me and Andrew
and the other podcasters, right?
The other podcasters, they understand that,
but him and I, for some reason,
and I know you're like this,
some of our dreams are still tied up
with television and movies,
because we're a little older
You know me and we're just we were same right so it's like I think we gotta I
Want to talk about yours? I talked about me
I have to sort of kind of you know me and kind of unlearn that you know me and find that this is the dream
Yeah, but I do we like the others no we love the other stuff, but I'm just saying but you are right
I think that it's great.
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I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
I'm saying that it's actually also working in the industry.
When the casting agency is a thing that really makes them laugh hard, it doesn't matter what
the venue is.
Right.
They see you killing it in a post.
People get cast off of that
just as much as anything else nowadays.
I know, but you did it the traditional way, right?
I mean, you got a manager, agent, took acting classes,
you auditioned for a commercial.
I mean, you kind of moved your way up,
but I don't know, right?
And there was like a clear pathway of a way to do it.
And I think you and I were the same way, right or no?
Well, yeah, for a little bit.
And then the industry kind of changed.
Yeah, it changed.
Wait, do you guys have a headshot
that on the back has four different activities?
100%, yeah.
See, we're old school like that.
Soccer, yeah.
The kids today, they don't have those headshots
with the things of the, yeah, the skateboarding.
Yeah.
Ken Ali, not Ken Cliff.
Languages, I don't know any other language
but English, but I would put like five things on there.
I had eating cereal was one of the pictures.
I can eat cereal commercial.
Yeah, yeah, it's crazy.
When we used to have to bring in those fucking headshots,
it was so demeaning and they'd like throw it in a pile
and you were like, that cost me $4.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They throw it away, you know, you like, that cost me $4. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
They throw it away, you know,
you'd get stacks of them in your fucking car.
I was around when your agent would call you and go,
oh, you have an audition tomorrow.
Okay, cool.
All right, come pick up the sides.
And so I would go to an alleyway, you know what I mean?
And they would have like a filing thing.
Yeah.
And I would have to look up Al Lee and pull out my, like I'd have to drive there.
You know what I mean?
And there'd be sometimes a line of other actors there.
Once I learned that they were acronyms for agencies,
I would make up fake acronyms of an agency.
I would just, I'd type in three letters.
It'd be like CBF or whatever,
CBF Creative Agency or whatever.
Yeah.
They would never check,
why would they ever fucking even check?
It was just like the guy who was my manager
was out of his studio apartment
next to the Magic Castle.
That's a hack.
Yeah.
That works.
I mean, it got me enough around
where I got to sneak into shit.
But that's what you used to have to,
I have to staple your headshot to your resume or whatever.
Yeah.
Another thing people would go is like.
Fucking hated that.
Hey, are you in SAC? Am I pointing, I'm building up the points or whatever. Yeah. Another thing people would go is like. Fucking hated that. Hey, are you in SAG?
Am I pointing, I'm building up the points or whatever, right?
That was the whole thing.
If you were in SAG or not, you know what I mean?
There's a catch-22, you couldn't get a job
unless you were in SAG,
but you can't get SAG unless you get a job.
Right, and then there was this mysterious thing
called Taft-Hartley, I don't even know what the fuck that is.
Am I even saying it right?
Yeah, Taft, yeah.
Taft.
Well, they merged.
Aftra and SAG merged.
But Taft Hartley was how you got into
the back door. That's what I'm saying.
I said it right, right?
Yeah. Okay, good.
Yeah, you did.
Yeah, yeah, thank you so much.
Inside baseball talk.
But the truth is, if the director really wants you,
they'll find a way to get you into SAG to do the movie.
It just costs a little more money.
It's a little more hassle, but.
That happened to Mark Pellington, the guy that directed this, the first thing I ever
did when the studio I worked at as a PA, I got this role to deliver Luke Wilson a pizza.
And then they overshot and the PA, I did 13 hours in a trailer, just like sitting, waiting,
sitting, waiting, like excited, excited. The PA came and was like, cutting your scene,
good night. And I was like, oh my God.
Fuckin' killed me, dude.
And then Mark Pellenton was smoking a cigarette.
By the way, that director, Mark Pellenton,
famously directed, if I'm not wrong,
Jeremy, Pearl Jam's Jeremy.
I think that was-
Great song.
I think that's what he did, look that up.
But he was smoking a cigarette or something
or hanging out by the trailers and he was like,
oh, I heard they fucking cut your shit.
I was like, yeah.
And then I wanted to be like, didn't you cut my shit?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Where's they?
And then he was like, we'll get you back, dude.
Lie, lie.
No, he was true.
They brought me back as a hospital orderly
and they gave me a line.
I was like, sir, you can't be out of your room.
Wait, that's you? No, that's...
Manifest the word.
That's Jeremy, yeah.
No, but he was cool, man.
That was a fucking really rad thing.
But that's... that was one...
You need those little tiny moments sometimes
to like give you a little bit more hope.
Because after that, I thought, fuck, man.
I was so excited to have one line to maybe get in the union,
to be able to get another job
And it's a huge thing that dude did a favor. You know, I got it, you know
Talking about that and about Borderlands
Sorry to bring it back. But it made me think of a story about how I met
Kevin Hart years before
We did Jumanji together and it was just sort of a general meeting.
He was kind of new and up and coming and he was going around, we were at the same agency
and he was going around meeting all the different people at the agency to just talk about maybe
developing something.
And we had a good meeting, just hitting it off, talking about things that we liked.
And then years later, I got that call to do Jumanji.
And it was Kevin, I know it was Kevin that got me in into that room because even though
I had a lot of success before Jumanji, I was in a little bit of a dip and I was like, God,
I got to get another gig.
And I remember thinking that Kevin Hart, he's a standup guy.
He's a great guy.
He said we were going to work together and he went out of his way, I believe, and made it
happen, which is cool.
You even think you've been in dips?
Yeah, that's the thing.
No matter how good it goes, this industry is a fucking Leviathan and you never know
when it's gonna end.
And you see it all the time. Oh, yeah. Get it ejected off the roller coaster.
And it's such a fun job and it's such a fun life.
The name of the game is staying in it.
And you can feel it as soon as like if you're in
in like a wave of like, I'm getting lots of gigs.
This is going fucking great. It's gangbusters.
And you can almost go like, fuck, I can't wait for a break.
When is the Google calendar gonna be empty
so I can just chill?
But then as soon as it gets empty
and you don't have anything on the horizon,
there's a panic.
Ice cold water in the veins, like oh fuck,
I gotta get something.
And yeah, you get those moments.
I think everybody has.
Well I'm glad to hear that.
We're glad to hear that you get them.
Yeah, because I get them all the time.
That's how we feel all the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're all like oh my god. I'm dead. Yeah
I mean, I get don't like me I get the Ken Jeong Randall Park show now. Okay. All right
I guess the right thing you'll never be
Yeah, no, I'm no you're right also can I say this I'm fine
I'm grateful. I'm so grateful. You should be. Yeah, and so happy. Yeah, life is good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So Borderlands comes out August what? August 9th.
Borderlands is gonna come out August 9th. You must go see this movie.
If you're in a theater and you do see the trailer pop up, it does look really good. You're in two scenes.
You're in two scenes. The cut. You're in two scenes.
We've got a scene together where I'm clap-trap the robot
and in the bar and you're in the bar.
Oh, that's right.
I remember now.
I turn around.
Now I was all prerecorded,
so maybe you heard my voice when you were shooting it
or maybe you didn't.
I did hear it.
Maybe someone was reading clap-trap for me.
I did hear it.
But you were in Bulgaria kicking, was it Bulgaria?
It wasn't, but I love when you say it. I don't even know where you were in Bulgaria kicking. Was it Bulgaria? It wasn't.
I love when you say it.
I don't even know where you were.
Budapest. Budapest.
Budapest. Budapest. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I also want to talk about how,
just something about Eli Roth.
You worked with him with The Clock.
Yep. Yeah, right.
And you worked with Kate before too.
Yep.
But I just, what, I mean, I've done some things
and I just love that guy as a director
because he makes you feel comfortable, man.
Yeah, really fun, really fun to work with.
Yeah, yeah.
And also good stories.
Yeah, he's got great stories, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I'll say this one other thing about the movie,
it's got vibes that are kind of like,
did you ever see Total Recall, Schwarzenegger?
Love.
It's got that kind of vibes where it's another planet
and it's kind of like rough and ready.
It's like a hard neighborhood world
and it's kind of like a desert
and it's squash buckling
and it's death-defying and kick-ass.
A lot of good explosions.
So you saw the movie?
Oh yeah.
Don't be jealous.
It's not just because I got a sneak a peek.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
Yeah.
He's famous.
I know, but he saw the movie.
No, dude.
But no, I saw it, but it still had the numbers on the bottom and the thing and the watermark,
so I'd be in trouble if I...
But you saw it from beginning to end. I would have forwarded it to you, but I couldn't. thing and the watermark so I'd be in trouble if I... But you saw it from beginning to end.
I would have forwarded it to you,
but I couldn't, it had the watermark.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You do know he recorded it, he's been selling it.
All right, right, right, right.
He's been bootleg.
Well, I'm glad you said that because I don't know
what the movie's gonna be like.
It's gonna be great, we're all gonna go together.
Oh, you're gonna come?
We're gonna have a family outing.
I think it's gonna be amazing.
It's got that kind of Road Warrior
like post-apocalyptic
Do you have anything else you want to plug that like coming up? Um, I did a little movie called
Minecraft but that's not gonna be
They did it based on the video game I only do video games, dude
I just basically do whatever my my sons tell me now what is Minecraft how is that gonna be a movie? Exactly. Oh that's what we have to
figure it out. Well it's like not obvious it's like that can't be a movie can it?
Yeah. Can it? Yes it can. It can. Wow. What's that gonna be like? Yeah. That's
harder to describe. I'm not even gonna try. Oh really? But it's a combo of live action,
it's me, it's not a cartoon,
and animated, like computer animated,
the world of Minecraft, you see it when you play it.
Wow.
So there's humans, what's another movie like that?
Roger Rabbit?
Tron?
Tron, yeah, closer to Tron.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And it's pretty rad, and it's pretty funny.
I bet it is.
My old pal Jared Hess, who directed Nacho Libre,
is at the helm.
Oh wow.
Napoleon Dynamite too, right?
Napoleon Dynamite, if you need him.
And Jason Momoa, it's me and him.
And some great kids.
And yeah, look for that next year, probably around April 1st-ish. Wow, dude, awesome. in him and some great kids.
And yeah, look for that next year, probably around April 1st-ish.
Wow, dude, awesome.
That's fucking awesome.
Danielle Brooks, amazing, in the color purple recently.
She kicks ass as well.
Also great singer, that Danielle Brooks.
She's in this too?
Yeah.
Jesus.
And there might be a tiny little bit of music,
but I don't know what I'm allowed to say.
It's one of those where they don't want you to talk to them.
You wrote some of the soundtrack?
I mean, there might be some.
I'm saying there might be some, so I'm not going to get in trouble for anything.
Okay, well, we'll wait and see.
Minecraft!
But have you, I've never played the game, because I do love secret place games.
I am building rocks and shit and playing fucking Minecraft.
That might not be a song.
It's gotta be PG.
I don't know, should I play it?
Minecraft? Yeah.
I like building worlds, I like building, but it's so blocky.
I don't even know how it works.
Dude, it's really fun, but it is like learning a language.
You gotta spend some time learning the world. I did it because my boys were deep into Minecraft
for a long time, and I wanted just to speak of their language.
So I learned how to do it, and then I got into it.
It's like architectural.
You will be building buildings and digging tunnels
and making progress.
But do you raid other...
Is there, like, combat in it or what?
There is fighting at night time.
If you get caught outside, outside of a shelter,
you will have to scrape and scrap to survive
and there will be zombies, there will be exploding thingies,
I can't remember what they're called.
Creepers. Creepers.
This is true, fighting should only be at night by the way,
that makes the most sense.
Yeah.
Daytime is for chilling out. What do you mean? Nighttime is for fighting. What do you mean? Why don't fight, there shouldn only be at night, by the way. That makes the most sense. Yeah. Daytime is for chilling out.
What do you mean?
Nighttime is for fighting.
What do you mean?
Why don't fight?
There shouldn't be daytime battles in these games.
It should be only at night.
It's cooler, it's sexier, it's darker.
I guess you're right.
Yeah, night fight, dude.
Night fight.
Remember Silent Hill?
Yes.
You guys all remember now.
Yeah, the video game.
Silent Hill.
When it first came out, it was so fucking scary.
Because the first game where it was dark, like foggy.
And there was just creatures that would come run out at you, and it was scary and jumpy.
And you would have like a, I forgot what you had, but you had an apparatus.
But there was an elementary school there.
And you were not supposed to go over there, remember?
I know, I know.
My parole officer said, no, but there's little kids,
like demons and stuff.
Oh, yeah.
I found that to be so fucking scary.
You know what I mean?
There he is.
Anyway.
Looks kind of like Michael Cera.
Yeah, yeah, a little bit like Michael Cera.
He could play in the movie Silent Hill.
Yeah.
So, Jack, I want to say, number one, what a pleasure to movie Silent Hill. Yeah. So Jack, I wanna say, number one,
what a pleasure to have you on.
Truly.
It was, because we didn't know how it was gonna go.
Me neither, I was scared.
No, but it was probably the best time I've had.
Since MCG.
No, no, no.
Everything's different, but this was like,
it felt like you were already a part
of the ecosystem of podcasting.
It felt like having Shane Gillis or somebody on, right?
It just felt natural, and you know how to add information,
and you're silly, and it was just a blast.
And if you ever need to plug anything,
you're always welcome back.
Hey, how about this?
If it ever comes a time when all three of us
have empty Google calendars,
we get together and we fucking come up with some shit.
I like this a lot.
You know what I mean? That's what happens.
You circle the wagons.
I'm gonna circle it, too.
We'll circle the wagons over a cheeseburger,
which would be really nice.
It'd be fun, even if the Google Calendar's not him.
I want to be in a Western.
I hear you.
And I want to be opium den guy.
Wait a second.
Is there an opium den in the Western?
What do you mean, in Deadwood and all these towns?
Oh, right.
Right.
Remember in fucking, once in my time in America with Robert De Niro.
Oh wow.
You remember that one?
You're a cinephile.
It's like a Sergio Leone, not Sergio Leone, it was a...
Yeah.
Sergio Leone.
It was a Sergio Leone, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was a prequel to Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And there was that opening, right this way, Mr. Joe.
You know what I mean, I always wanted to play
the opium dang guy, you know what I mean?
Yeah, you can do it.
What?
You can do it.
I think I can do it.
What's going on in that tent?
Oh, we have an opium straight from China my friend really got open from China
No, me and my friend here traveled a long way. It's weed
It's Mexican smoking. Is this fucking brickweed?
You gave me brickweed. Yeah. Yeah, me and my boy didn't come all the way here for brickweed
Anyway, Jack. Thank you for being a bad friend. Thank you for being here. Anytime.
Thank you so much.
Give Jack Black a round of applause, guys.
That was fucking amazing.
Awesome.
That was so fun.
Loved it. Yeah! Woo! Yeah! Woo! Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
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Woo!
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Woo!
Woo!
Woo!