Bad Friends - High Brow Friends

Episode Date: February 8, 2021

Thank You to our Sponsors: https://betterhelp.com/badfriends & http://helixsleep.com/badfriends & http://shipstation.com & http://hellofresh.com/badfriends10 Subscribe to our YouTube: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube 0:00 Rudy Has a Secret 4:10 Bobby's Monologue with Sticky Fingaz 8:30 Andrew Wants Magnum 12:03 The Bad Friends Review: 'In & Of Itself'  16:00 The Great Debate: Basquiat vs Renoir 24:03 The 2nd Great Debate: Elf vs Mean Streets 36:02 Rudy Names Composers 44:30 The Machete Story 57:37 The Asian White Party 1:07:20 Rudy's School Presentation on Grateful Dead More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbyleelive.com/ More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com/ More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Produced by George Kimmel & Bryce Hallock - 7EQUIS Podcast Producers: Jenna Sunde, Joe Faria, Andrés Rosende Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I mean kind of we can hear the fans more than anything else But it looks good Doesn't look good Jules. Yeah, it looks good. All right. We can't hear you. I can't hear you now I can't hear you at all, but you look good You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? Anchor. If you haven't heard about anchor, it's the easiest way to make a podcast. Let me explain. Oh, please It's free. Awesome. That's cool These are there are creation tools that allow you to record and edit your podcast right from your phone or your computer

You do it from your phone like on the go. Oh my god That's cool the bus or the subway you can do it. That's cool Anchor will distribute your podcast for you so it can be heard on Spotify Apple podcast and many many many many many many many many more You can make money from your podcast too. No minimum listenership. How about that? You can make money with no minimum listenership It's everything you need to make a podcast all in one place. Where do we have to go Bob? Download the free anchor app or go to anchor.fm to get started Why are you in a bad mood Jules? She's not in a bad mood. She just um, uh, let her say it. No, let me why? Because she's gonna deny it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm her attorney. Okay. Oh, sir. Yeah. I'm representing her. Oh, you do

Okay. Yeah, so my client here, um Here say this is here say right from different sources, right? I heard that she had her very first Panic attack today. Did you really? Yeah. Yeah, you don't know what it was. Welcome. I Know welcome to the club man. I've had so many of them. Thousands. Seriously. I'm having one right now Will you explain will you seriously explain your experience? Um, I was doing homework. Yeah. Yeah, and then my hand started to feel numb That's a stroke And my face fell asleep and my eyeball droop. Yeah, what is it? What else happened? Yeah, my hands felt shaky and numb and then I started to Breathe heavily like I couldn't breathe. Oh, like like you were yeah

Yeah, did it feel like your heart was skipping a beat or no was your heart pounding heavy like you could feel it out of your chest Right, correct another symptom. These are all dire. Do you know what you were thinking about at the time when it happened? Yeah, what was it? Secret. Oh And now we're gonna have to get that. Yeah, what's the secret? What's the secret welcome? Welcome back to what's that secret old saying you're as sick as your secrets. That's exactly right, right? What's your secret to make you sick? Secret secrets hurt someone. What is it? Secret secrets are no fun secret secret hurt someone dumb dumb to you if you have if you have it if you have it Every secret has a unique weight to it and you can only carry them for so long

What is your secret? It's a secret. Okay. It's a secret and what is it for long? This is where you make it up Okay, if you don't want to if you don't want us to know we've been doing this show for 51 weeks. Yeah Make it up. Okay My laptop broke. Oh, I'm having withdrawal with drools from what you're having with Rawls Valorant Valorant. Yeah. Yeah. That's sad. What's the real secret though? Yeah, that's it That's it. Yeah, that's such a what a bad also by the way to make you feel comfortable I'm genuine. I have I had panic attacks. Yeah for years and I had him in college

I've told the story before but this isn't fun I was working at a restaurant and I was serving and I was tired and dehydrated and I hadn't just hadn't eaten all day And I felt really like hazy and woozy and I didn't feel one. I was like, oh man, I just haven't eaten That's why yeah, but I also had worked myself like I was working crazy hours. I wasn't sleeping and I get these things called ocular migraines. Do you know what that is? I go blind in one eye like I like my vision goes away So I started to get an ocular migraine and I had all those symptoms I never had had a panic attack before and I had such a bad fucking panic attack

I went outside behind the restaurant and I laid down on the rocks. Yeah, like I was gonna die Yeah, another time what he did was he um, here it is What? No, no, go ahead. Well, you went to the bathroom You stood up you went You hit your head it wasn't a panic attack What was that? It was it was alcohol lack of sleep and lack of food. Okay, and whatever that is. He does that do and vertical Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was silly. Sometimes I hit my face on a sink counter. Oh

Am I the only one that's ever hit their head on a sink counter I did this movie called hard breakers, and it was a really bad movie and great director and And and and sticky fingers is that a rapper? Yeah sticky fingers fingers was in it Yeah, I was he was in the scene is the chess player right the chess player Yeah, right. Did I tell you the story about how I had a monologue? No, I mean, I know you guys played chess together We did play chess. So I had a monologue with them, right? Yeah, and I go the camera set up, right? Yeah, it's a it's a It's a single from my waist up sure and they go and also I remember them. They're running out of time Like like they have to wrap that we gotta go. We gotta go right and I have this one-page thing

Two words again do it the the hemisphere or whatever the line is the hemisphere the hemisphere is Stop and I have a fucking panic attack full on full on like I can't talk trembling sweating, right? Cut cut cut right and you know people come you're right cuz you know we got to go You're right cuz we got to go we got to go we got to go which only like puts fucking fuel on the fire Of course right then it's way worse. Yeah, so now I'm trembling like imagine if someone walked in the room when you're having a panic attack And I was like what's wrong, and you're like Yeah, yeah, and I remember They just moved on because you can't get the scene couldn't get it out

Oh, Bob. Yeah, yeah, but it look that's why when you call that's why when you call the casting director when I fail Sometimes you didn't have a panic. Okay. You didn't have a you call me out in that way another thing you call me How was that? Nothing you've been doing lately, which I don't like let me just get this out of the way. I love you so much Okay, I love you too is you call look at this weird crazy spider on my microphone. Yeah You deserve it. Look at that. Here's another thing that you've been doing. Oh, he's repelling this week. Yeah, that's been driving me cray-cray What is it? You call me it

I want to save his life though I'll put him in a bag. See see what happens. My therapist told me this is gonna happen. I Have a resentment I'm saving for later. I have a resentment. You mean I have the I'm No, it's fine. I'm brave enough brave enough to bring up So lots been going on in the news and in the social cycle What did I do I called you this week to talk to you about a few things. No, you've been calling me This is the first dude. This is what you've been doing. Mm-hmm. Did you get it?

I did no twice you did it, but you still don't know I Do know you don't I do because you got it. No, you got it. I didn't you got it. No, I didn't You didn't get it. No, they gave it to I don't know They don't tell you that on the phone. You can ask your agent. Yeah, but I didn't even ask they go You didn't get it. I don't know if I got it or not. You got it. No, I got a call saying they love me. They love you, right? And they like my audition told you right see and they're what are you doing on your business? I'm not even listening. That's what she's been doing lately. Who are you? Is anybody here? Are you here? No, because I'm reading my school's emails. Oh

Shit you bullshit fucking Fucking liar, it's true. Yeah, read it out loud. What does it say? It is true because in the car right over She was reading email. She goes like this 16th February 22 She kept saying that 1622 I go, what are you fucking saying right now? What is it? She said I have to go back to school 16th or February 22 February 22nd you need to go back. Yeah, is that what the email's about? Yeah, yeah All right, so now you know the information. Can you let it go and be in the present moment and do the fucking podcast?

Okay You're skating on thin ice Oh man, you're irritating me. Thinness ice. Irritating the fuck out of me right now. And you know what? We should make you tell the secret. That's what we should make you do because of what you're up to. But let me say something to you Andrew. I was hoping right that I wasn't gonna get it. Just I can give you shit about it. I know but that's the best part cuz you're gonna get it and then I can give you shit about it. Yeah, but here's the deal. Here's a stipulation. What if you get it? Yeah, I have to fly over there with you You're gonna go to Hungary

It's a Budapest. Yeah, is that where po-hungry is? It's Hungary and Budapest. Yeah, okay. Yeah, that's Hungary the peck capital Hungary is the city. Yeah, Budapest is the state. I know that the country. No Budapest is the state Oh, and it's within Turkey. Turkey's the citizen. Yeah, the citizenship the citizenship, right? And Lithuania and Greeks are dirty Shellfish eating people. They are. Yeah, they're dirty. They're dirty hairy people pieces of ships. I Know that fucking Hungary is a fucking country. Yeah, so don't be dumb dumb Budapest Budapest you'll fly over there with me. I want to so bad. I know but when I go to Hawaii

You never show up first of all first of all I asked you yeah Hey, wouldn't it be cool if I came to Hawaii and we did like a little bad friends of Hawaii Yeah, you know what you texted back what no exactly so what the fuck are you saying now? I want you to fight for it. Oh, you I want you to fight for why you dude You don't want this love to be that easy. Yeah, I want you to go come on man. You know what? I'm sure I should just show up. Yeah, I mean given this dude I when I was in Hawaii I had eight days off and you did nothing what did stuff But I wasn't there you were there alone. Yeah, I would wake up and I go why doesn't she go with you because we have so many

What are you doing? Nothing. Why do you have yet? You were I'm checking the time The time that we're at now. Yeah, we just started I just I just check the time Wow Wow, you know what if you don't want to be here Yeah, yeah, if you don't how about this if you don't want to be here too bad cuz you have to you have to be here Yeah, you have to otherwise You're you're done for yeah, you're gone here. We haven't even thought about here's what we haven't even thought about yeah She's getting accepted to colleges now. Oh No, I know so when do you go to college September?

So, oh my yeah, so now what college? I don't know yet, but you got accepted to one. Would you get accepted to rude? DeVry University Cal State Northridge. No Fullerton. Okay. That's that close. It's an it's something California. That's Anaheim That's like Fullerton's not far. You could still drive to come to the park. She has to if you go to Foulton Yeah, you have to what's the other one? We don't know yet. How many did you apply to? Eight eight of them eight schools. What's your dream school Long Beach? Yeah, Long Beach is a great school shout out Snoop Dogg. Yeah, wait the Long Beach Long Beach State. Yeah, yeah

You know the home of the what's their mascot? You're not gonna get in the home of the what if their administration is watching this right now Yeah, home of the we're really interested in this Rudy girl Rudy Jules time to improvise blue whales home of the blue Long Beach State California State Long Beach CSULB home of the dirt bags. That's their baseball team home of the dirt bags That's real. Yeah, that is real. That is actually real. Yeah, and they have a big pyramid where their basketball team plays Look, there's one right. Look there. It is right there. George is pulling it up so you can see it What's their new ass in the new mascots called the LB?

The LB is this as a shark click on the images. I'd like to see what the LB looks like ELB EE the LB Wow Okay, okay, what it used to be something racist. They had to get rid of it. What's that guy next to it? Prospector Pete J Leno That is literally J Leno You take it for a go show. Thanks for some go So this guy got banned prospector Pete probably because it was embedded in some sort of racial narrative that they were like We got to get rid of it. Mm-hmm. Can I say something else? It's so funny

Why do I do anything else I have to admit? Yeah, please and it's very difficult to admit it admit it. I will So How do I begin when you suggest things, you know when I suggest what things to watch or listen to TV and film Yeah, yeah, I do. I've done a great job. You know how many you how many people commented and said in and out of itself Okay, so I'm gonna talk about that life changing. Okay And I boy, I've got a list of new shit to watch because we've been watching. Okay. Can I just tell you about my story get it out? Okay, so you you you brought up in and of itself. Yes, and I you know, I go when you said it I thought to myself. I'm never gonna watch it. I

Will not what I will not. Mm-hmm. I refuse. Yeah, right. Yeah, so I'm at home, right? And I'm just on Hulu Right and I skim right. I'm skimming skimming, you know, they have the little things Suggest this. Yeah, you might like this. Yeah, and I I run past it. Yeah Just out of spite. Yeah out of spite dick So I go, you know what dude? I think I should watch it because I know I'm not gonna like it I know that whatever he says, I know that whatever he says about it, right? He's absolutely wrong Right, and so I'm just gonna watch it out of spite, right? So that I can come back to the podcast and go fuck you I wait you owe me two hours of my life or whatever it might be, right?

You waste significantly more than two hours of your own life on dumb shit. So go ahead. Okay I don't like the way you're fucking holding that fucking glass by the way. It's the biggest cup we've got. Okay, so I'm watching it. Mm-hmm five minutes in Five minutes in my eyes are going Told you I'm not being am I kidding you I told you and I had to push pause because you're Bob and I go Right and I hated myself for it by the end of the movie. Yeah, you were moved. Weren't you not moved? Snot bubbles not kidding you I'm trembling right. Yeah. Oh my god. It was life-changing. Yeah, and I could call it you have to watch this

Yeah, you guys will you FaceTime me? Yeah, and Kyle was in the background and she I didn't why didn't you watch it with her in The first place because she doesn't she's worse than When it comes to you. Yeah worse. Why? Because we just don't trust you You think we don't trust you you don't you don't trust my my we don't you don't Do a little bit you should all right you should now I'm beginning. Did you see you didn't see it yet? No No, it's amazing. Yeah, it is amazing. So what I'm saying is is that and other people I've read on Twitter that you suggested it I've watched it and they go. Thank you. They love it. I'm telling you right now now

You get a second person to validate Okay, okay. I'm saying that it's I'll tell you why I like it and I'll tell you why it's genius I'm not gonna give anything away. No, don't I'm not but he's taking two Performance arts mediums correct combining them combining them. Yeah, right and it's very authentic and original Yeah, but it's also very life-affirming and it's just well done. Yes. Yeah, and it's like It's just it you can tell you know, they say people say this a lot about You're not good at whatever your art is until you hit your 10,000 hour mark, you know

whether it's music or fashion or comedy or writing or perform and you can tell that this is He said 10,000 hours. Oh, yeah, you do not mean like you can tell when someone it's almost like when you watch a good comedy Special or listen to a great album when you go these guys Have really put in some fucking work. Yeah, it's just like it comes together It's like card tricks for instance. Sure, right? I would never be able to do it No, because I just know that I'll be doing it You're a fan, right? And I'll be doing it out and I'll already in my head ago. I fucked up already I mean, I don't know where the aces. Yeah, right. I lost it. It was supposed to be here on this finger

Yeah, I was supposed to be controlling it. Yeah, and I lost the control. It's in some guy's pocket Put the ace in me already. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's just you can't do magic. You can tell that he You okay, you know who else I got into this weekend. Oh, here we go. I got into on HBO Max as a show called Painting with John. Do you know that show? No, John Laurie look up John Laurie. It's a series So he had an original one called. Do you know who this is? No, man, John Laurie. You don't know this is Crazy mr. Uh, mr. Look at there is it's funny to think that you mr. Snob Artistic snob rat brat. Don't know who he is because he is a god in the artistic community Okay, can I one of Anthony Bourdain's best friends Bourdain's his name

One of Anthony Bourdain's best friend. I said Bourdain's I know who he was. Can I say something to you your attitude right now? So he was in New York. He's a musician a painter. I know this. Oh, you know who he is. Yes, you don't know who he is Yes, I do. He's my a sponsor See that's how you improvised. Yeah, that was just making up. Okay, this guy's got a show about painting and I'm gonna see something about art though Okay, yeah, I don't know much about it And I've never claimed on the show that I was an art connoisseur. No, but you think you're a high brow art I'm not high and I don't like the way you're doing that with your fingers. You like you like I don't like a eyebrow

You like high brow. I don't do this. No, you want to be a part of a hybrid community. Yeah. Yeah, yeah Yeah, I you know, but you're not yeah beanie You know, you know, I am you know what I am what low brow. Yeah, you're very low. Yeah, I'm very low brow And we might be throwing gang signs. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but I'm gonna tell you right now, dude I've never claimed that I don't know any okay about this. Let's do a contest It's not that you don't claim it. Name me 20 artists just off the history of the world Go ahead 20 15

We're gonna sit here while I go through them. Yeah. Yeah, I want to know artists of any kind. Yes, really? Yeah mediums, you know, I mean But I can pick music I can pick no no no in terms of just um painting Either it be, you know abstract or Picasso. There we go rembrandt. Here we go Renoir thinking go ahead Uh, uh, Jackson Pollock bingo, uh, I can use him John Laurie. There we go Uh

He's weird to name That's why I like doing it. It's very hard. I mean, I don't know anything about painting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um, let's name some more painters. Uh, Uh, don't know Yeah, there is There's a don't know. I'll let it slide don't know though. Go ahead. I'll give you don't know though. Don't know though Go ahead. Um, uh warhol Very good. I guess. Yeah, basquiat, but very good. Bluh, whatever. I love basquiat I know you do you see exact this is what I mean. Love it. Take a time out. Take a time out. We're on eight. Okay

You would love dolly. You miss dolly. Yeah, Salvador Dolly. You would love basquiat You know why why because people have this affinity for that guy Even though what he made was only revolutionary because he was like A black artist in new york when it was all white hoity 20 outside of that his stuff wasn't that good Basquiat's stuff wasn't that good. None of it was like wow. My god All basquiat stuff was fine. It was like, yeah, that's fine art. I guess it's good. It's good But it wasn't mind-blowing. It was it was just unique because he was a young black artist in an all-white world Which is credible, but this isn't that good. That's very good. This isn't that good. Very good. That's fine

You don't know you Rudy can do that. I'm gonna say this already can do that You're the look look look you're very good. Not so good. Yeah Yeah, all right, can I just say this bring up a Renoir bring up a rent a Renoir all right Renoir, but stop it That's my point. Can I see this? Let me see what I want to say. Okay. Let me see what look at that Look at that sex realism. Look at that fat. Look at that fight fat white girl by the water My uncle Han can make a fucking realistic plan of painting like that. Yeah, that's my wrong call You know what you're you know how technical that is and basquiat was like you Oh, really? So you're all right. So you right you think that basket blah blah blah, right? Yeah

What about this guy? What if you're a guy right here, right? Who put me the fucking brush in the pink hand and just doing this Jackson Pollack Who fucked yourself? I just named him white guy. That's your guy My art has been commended as being strongly vaginal. I just named him. Okay. What's a good Asian artist then? People I know who David Cho you name one. That's that's the only one get off a show. No, I'm not gonna He's a personal friend of mine. Thank you. Another one. Give me another one. Give me another Asian artist that you love. Um I can't Better help. Oh boy. Um during this pandemic. Nothing has helped me more than better help

Yeah, a therapy has saved my life. Um, I go through trauma therapy through better help It's really improved my life and um Is there something interfering with your happiness or preventing you from achieving your goals? Yeah, there are many probably a lot of things. Yeah, better help will assess your needs and match you with your own life as a professional therapist You can start communicating in under 48 hours. It's not a crisis line. It's not self-help It's professional counseling done securely online. Tell them more Andy. Look, it's a broad range of expertise available And uh, I gotta tell you we both use therapy. We've talked about it on the show a lot It's a big proponent of our lives and I think it helps everybody for everything that you're going through

All right Better help they're committed to facilitating great therapeutic matches They make it easy for you to change counselors if need be Uh, better help just wants you to live a happier life. I know a lot of people are weird about therapy. Trust me It's definitely worth it. Just try it out. Uh, so many people have been using it all over So give yourself, uh, give yourself a break and get some get a little help visit betterhelp.com slash bad friends That's help hlp join over over a million people who have taken charge of their mental health

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Over three months risk-free. They'll even pick it up for you if you don't love it, but you'll love it I promise they're offering $200 off all mattress orders and two free pillows 200 bucks off and two free pillows for our listeners at helix sleep comm slash bad friends That's helix sleep comm slash bad friends. Look at how look at david show phenomenal. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So for my money I'll pay for that over basquiat. Okay. This is my point. I'll get was great. Look at how talented that is Put that side by side with a basquiat george. Look at how beautiful that looks And now show me show me whatever fucking candle they're selling at urban outfetters with a basquiat fucking label written on it That's what they do now. Yeah, they sell us stuff right that is move

Oh, show me. No, go back. Go back. Go back. Go go to boxer. That's one of his most famous. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, look at this Click on boxer make it big images usually helps There it is. All right, right there. Look at this Can I say something about this? My niece My niece My niece can make it. All right. All right. When you when you have a realism don't ever do that again This is my mic. Oh, that's right. Okay. So what I'm saying is is that let's calm down for a second. Okay Yeah, why did we get so hot because you got mad about the artist thing. I know because um, you know a lot of artists can do realism

All right. I knew dudes in art class in high school that could draw my face Okay, really get technical. Yeah tough face to draw tough face to draw. Okay. It's unique It's not it's round. But it just do slits. It's round, but it has you just do a circle two slits A mouth and two holes. It's like a smiley face. Yeah. All right. It's very easy to do. You have a smiley face. All right I'm gonna say about fucking Basquiat, right David Joe's art. Let me finish my point better than Basquiat I said it. David Joe's art is better than Basquiat. Let me finish my point. Bam. Okay. Is is that no one Could do what Basquiat does because that's an original That comes from his mind. So what do you mean? David Chopin's nothing original? No, he does but I'm just saying if there's more realism

It's it's abstract. There's you could right these are two different look at a David Joe painting Although he's a friend of mine. He's very talented, right and compared to other people's right But with Basquiat when you see a Basquiat, you know that it's him. Yeah, it's yes because it's uniquely bad Because it looks like a child. No, no, it looks like a child's painting and then I'm gonna do it Children do it all the time do that all the time. No, they can't all the time You know what? I'm gonna show you every fridge and every fridge in Sherman Oaks every parents like look at what braden did Yeah, braden does that. Yeah, that looks like finger paint for braden And what so you can you can't compare also? I know these are two different kinds of art. I understand you can't compare, right?

Like a movie like elf Great film great film and a movie like mean streets Yes, you can now you can elf is better Elf is better Elf is not better. Elf is better. All right, all right then elf, right and And apocalypse now Elf is better. It's not fucking better. Elf is better. Elf is better It's not better. It's not better. You know, it's not better. You know, it's not better

You just say that to give me give me something else that you think will beat elf because I'm telling you right now Elf is still winning for okay memorable lines The character I'll give you another one. I'll give you one. Okay elf. Okay versus um The original star wars Oh, that's tough two different movies. That's very tough. Okay two. How about elf? Hold on original alien? Two different movies. You can't compare the two. I'm gonna go with of course elf Yeah, you know what I'm saying you can't compare art, right? It's hard. It's hard. My point is when I see Baskett stuff. I know it's his stuff compare the compare the rotten tomatoes between

Compare the rotten between between elf. What did it get? Well in 84 percent Do you go by tomato score or audience score? Not audience You don't do audience because half of those guys are fucking trump supporters. What do you mean? Marjorie Taylor green. What's the tomato score then? Who are they? What? People that know about film. What? No. No, these are film people Are they are they the ones that are buying all the box office tickets? No, that's the people matter Yeah, but the critics don't matter. You know, no, no now. We're going into a fucking purse and here's why I say something Here's what happened at the golden globes all all these names were released and everybody was like

That's what what is this? No one watched any of that because that's why you have the golden globes and you have the people's choice awards No, people. No one watches the people's choice award. That's not a real thing. You don't have a fuck You don't have a fucking people's choice awards party. My point is over. Let's watch The most likeable side the golden globes should be about the people the Emmys should be about the the the the the academy Listen, okay When you by the way, you and I are never going to any of these things. I we're never gonna get invited You know what I am. No, you're not I am you'll go to the razzies

No, I will go to the Emmys one day. You'll go to the fluces of the Aziz. The Emmys What was what were you working? I interviewed? Twice you were interviewing people. Yeah, I just entered a william h basic question Yeah, okay, and the second thing is you're not going to go to the Emmys. Yes. I am you're not you'll go with somebody's guest I'm going to take you as my guest. No, no, and I can't wait. Holy fuck. I can't fucking. No, no, stop stop If Dave if Dave it's nominated. I'm taking you as my guest wait I'm not going to take for me to get invited to the fucking Emmys not going to go in your face. You're not going to go Yes, I am you're not going to go. Oh, you're saying that I'll get invited, but why won't go. Oh, no

I'm saying you won't go you won't get invited. I will get invited for what? We're at the show that I just sold to ABC. No I love it, but I'm going to say this. Okay. Yeah, this is that that got 84 percent, right? What did alien get? What's alien george? 95 no, oh, that's mean streets means obviously obviously mean streets is a come on obviously, but you said earlier Alien got what 98 higher than means right? So my boy that means alien is better than mean streets, right? Your point is right. You're right, and it's also better than elf In this world. Yes, but but my point is you can write in tomatoes work. You can't compare the two

We just did I know but that's one thing maybe some other side would have some other opinion My point is is that they're two different fucking art is subjective, right? But someone's got to judge at some point right so and also kind of to make this argument too Is is that there have been bands where people you go? Oh, why would anyone buy a creed album? But millions of people do it's a great band Oh my god great band great music You're fucking you you're you're really doing it. You're a Chad right now Nothing against creed

What I'm saying is is that you know you can compare, you know, it's just like it's not Great, I would never buy it and it's like I think people in hordes Like stuff that aren't good. You can because you can't trust people you can only compare it on a technical level, right? you can't go creed is not as good of a band that term not as good of a band as um any of them Stop it because they are better than some of them. Okay creed is not as good of a band as the black keys, right?

You could say that yes, and then someone would go well, I don't like the black keys. I love creed, but you can say creed that person Creed is a fucktart Okay, you can say creed isn't as musically Technically talented as a bike and that's a more valid are you look at an out a creed album, right? And then you look at okay computer Sure, right? I'll side by side right side by side. Yeah, it's not even a fucking okay computer blows it out of the water All right, it's a masterpiece. I don't I'm saying I just I like album. I agree beginning to end

It's a fucking master. I agree, but there's people out there that don't yeah And those people are the ones that fucking may review and rotten tomato. I don't trust them That's my point. Yeah, but some of those people also the tomato Listen, I know this and this is maybe Maybe why some people call me an elitist. That's what it is an elitist. You're crazy today You're never crazy today, but okay, so I might be a little bit of an elitist, right? But there are certain things that are good. That's why when I even when you say I'm not going to that fine Okay, that might be true. All right, I'm kidding. You can go if you want. I don't what do I know? No, no

Let me tell you something Not only is your show your show is going to get an emmy a golden globe And it's going to be the first television show that gets an Oscar Your show. Oh, I do now you're being a fucking asshole, and you'll get a gram. It's impossible. You're going to get an egot All right, so what I'm saying though is Oh god, my throat is My throat I can't even swallow what we're saying is you know what neither of us know what we're talking about I mean, let me just close out my fucking close it up close out my fucking argument close it up, papa

Is I do know there are just certain things right in terms of art right that More creative more relevant more um You know putting their finger on What's going on on the planet? Yeah, the world right culture culture and there are some albums are just put out Right quickly. Yeah, right through some sort of like corporate

Machine. Yeah, right and it's only there so that people the masses What is that the them that's the masses right they'll go buy it Right, right and I I'm not necessarily, you know going to listen to them when it comes to film Okay, okay, who do you listen to have because you have it's like it's like those patriots They say America America is the greatest country in the world when a lot of them have never even visited other countries How do they know right? Well, you don't need to go anywhere when you're in the best You're not going to leave a Morton steakhouse and go to an outback. Are you? That's a good one

All right, my point though right being is is that a lot of these people go This movie is the greatest movie in the whole world when they haven't seen being there or Paris, Texas or you know I mean any of these, you know, I mean, but maybe it's the best to them You can't still okay. No, but some of them say it's the best of all time This movie is the best. Oh, have you seen you know, I mean any Curacao a film or have you seen but there is no best of all time It doesn't exist. There are there is no best of there's there are 50 films, right that most people that Critique films right and have seen all the films will say that generally we we're pretty confident that these 50 Right are in the best films of all time. Yeah, but we don't know what's coming next

I know what I'm saying is is that I'll tell you that citizen Kane will probably always be on that list It'll be on a list because of some of the best films, but it won't be for it won't be forever times will change my friend Yo, I'm sure in the fucking in the fucking parliamentary days that they thought Finger flicking They were like this is the illest shit of all time. It's not Really? Yeah, that's not that you don't put it on anymore. You don't care. I used to show pan all the fucking time You don't like show pan. Yes, I do. When's the last time he's played show pan inside the house? I don't know

I don't know exactly. She doesn't know who show pan. She doesn't know let me name me six composers right now This is tough this is tough six composers Wait, I forgot everything already because it's pressure You can't name one We just named one Um Okay, we'll give you clues. We'll give you close. We'll give you killer clues. Okay. How about this? All right Well, one of them one of them was they did a movie about a dog a big hairy dog big hairy dog

But that's the composer's name and the guy and john. What was the actor name? He used to yell his name The the dog's name all the time. Yeah. Yeah, he used to go It starts with a b. Yeah b Bay it starts with bay Bay Bay, I don't know how to pronounce it say it try it try bay bay bay Beethoven Beethoven. Wow. That's good. That was very difficult. Okay. What's another one right?

There's another guy right His first name right was the guy that makes pizzas Right, there's a famous guy that makes fancy pizzas in Beverly Hills. That's right. He has the same name as a composer I don't okay his middle name His middle name his middle name is Amadeus I don't know She doesn't know Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Puck. Mozart. Wolfgang Amadeus Puck He's a great restaurant where you go in there and you jam out to classical music. So you never heard of them?

Mozart, I heard of him Mozart. You know Mozart, but Beethoven, right? Bach Kind of yeah, yeah, kind of Bach. Yeah Yeah I've learned in therapy today. Okay, I forgot what day it is therapy day. It's therapy day. So um I went to therapy this morning too. I like to affirm my paranoia Like like Yeah, all right. So um what I did was Friday night, you know, I'm on a show magnum

You are yeah And one of the older episodes aired and some guy on twitter goes Bobby Lee Literally is the worst actor Right And who's and who does this guy? Well, then today he made fun of my penis. So I know that he has something against me I'm sorry guys. It was it was Andres. Oh my god. Andres, if it's you I'd laugh so hard and you're fired But what I do then is this so I read the tweet, right? Why?

Well, because you're scrolling and then you kind of I know, right? So, but this is what I said This is what my therapist got so mad at me today. So this is what I do. I go I read the tweet and I go No, I know it's crazy. It's insane. So what I do is this I produce a I text a producer Oh, because you want where I go. So was it bad? Which is like Not good man And I do that when I take takes like if I don't think that take is good. You ask no, but I'll hang out by video No, I really will I'll let like if you're the director, I'll just stand around like this

They're resetting a different. Do you want to do you watch playback? Is that why? No, no, I'll just kind of go Do you get it? And my therapist goes you can no longer do that ever you can't that's so bad for you I know I don't do it in a desperate needy way. No, it's not desperate I know I do it in a very kind. I'll just kind of like I'll whistle to You know, I'll you know, I'll play with my feet a little bit If they lock eyes, I'll go you get it Yeah, we got it. We're moving on. Come on. Why are you so insecure about it? Once you know once it's locked. It's over

I understand that I don't know But it's just like I'm just things that I'm learning in therapy. That's all and your therapist said no longer You're gonna do it. I can no longer do that But is there a way that you can check yourself to make sure you don't do it again? I had to self soothe You do I have to self soothe and the way I go. I don't even know what that means So what he she said was um because I've had I don't know why but I'm um for some reason like I'll just give you an example. I can't tell you who but

Like this always used to happen to me. Like I'd be on stage. This is like in 15 years ago Like I'd be at the improv. Yeah, I'd be on stage and a female comic would walk in Right with a black eye. I'm not kidding you No, with a black eye. Can I know who you know, I can't tell you who and she'd be like Look at me. She would look at me. I was that guy That you hit her. No, but she would have to talk to me I was like I was like the female comics tampon Right where were like female comics would go, you know, I mean, you know, this guy was really aggressive with me

What do I do? You know, I mean I was that guy. Did you do anything about the gun? No, no, but I you know, I'm just you know So I I'm good at soothing other people Yeah, I'm saying so how I deal with other people, right? I'm gonna do it to myself Right, that's how I'm gonna self suit. That's good. Yeah. Yeah. So stop spending time trying to soothe for others You self soothe Yeah, self self soothe. I'm trying to self soothe myself Ship station. Oh, we would be nothing without ship station and all of our merch ships out of ship station, Bob Use this service in at bad friends here. So if you bought some of our merch, which and if you haven't what are you doing by some

We use ship station through that because it's incredible. And if you sell stuff online, you're definitely in the right business More people are shopping online more than ever That means a lot of orders coming in and a lot of orders. You'll need to be shipped out fast. That's why online sellers So blur that's Bob. That's why online sellers like you need ship station No matter how much you sell ship station makes it super easy to manage and ship all your orders from all your sales channels faster Cheaper and more efficiently Import orders from any sales channel ship any with any carrier access discounted shipping rates Automate just about any shipping tasks. No matter what you're selling you guys Amazon Etsy your own website ship station

Funnels all your orders into one simple interface you can use and manage from anywhere even your cell phone Honestly, if you're selling stuff on the internet, uh, you really should be using ship station Use our offer code bad friends to get a 60 day free trial. That's two months free. No hassle stress free shipping Just go to shipstation.com click on the microphone at the top of the page and type in bad friends shipstation.com enter code Bad friends to get a 60 day free trial. That's right two months free of no hassle stress free shipping That's right ship station.com enter code bad friends make ship happen. Hello, fresh. You know what Andy? Yeah, Bob I love hello fresh. Oh do I yeah hello fresh is one of my favorite if you don't know what it is come on Wake up you get fresh pre-measured ingredients and mouthwatering seasonal recipes delivered right to your front door

And you can do it yourself. I can yeah, it's it's it's imagine this I'm stupid and I can do it Yeah, you're your own chef Boyardee. Yeah. Oh Nice and I put on my little mittens and my little apron and your little hat and my little hat And when I get hello fresh and I know the meal is gonna be good It's gonna be delicious one of the best guess who cooked a hello fresh meal yesterday. What Andy? Who me Bobbo? Yeah, I cooked it by the way You should try it if you've never tried it if you're someone that hates going to the grocery store Me and if you hate trying to plan out what to cook me hello fresh delivers this to your front door

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It's go to hello fresh comm slash bad friends 10 And use code bad friends 10 for 10 free meals including free shipping That's right. Go to hello fresh comm slash bad friends 10 use the code bad friends 10 for 10 free meals including free shipping I already said that Andy It says say it again, Bob. Okay. It really is america's number one meal kit true And what do you have to do with Rudy? That's you can't sue you don't know no soothing she

Has a thing with me is that um and it it it may never work out Our relationship may never work out I have to say that and that's real But she's going to college. He's not working out Six months Yeah, and I'll tell you why right is she doesn't she has a thing where She doesn't come to meet with any problems. She hot. She well She that's why she's having panic attacks. She goes to kalayla obviously or she's burying it

No, she goes to kalayla with all her problems and I hear her problems via Kalayla, right? Yeah, she just you know this happens. She would never say it to me. Why? I'll come in the kitchen and she'll just this is what she does I'll walk in the kitchen and let's say she's standing right here as soon as I walk She'll just go around the counter To avoid you to avoid me. Yeah, but also to be fair to her you can be very volatile at times Am I ever volatile and be real? Sometimes like in what way and this is good. I don't think we should do this right now. No, I think this is the moment

It's not negative. It's not negative. So what is it the thing that I do that's volatile? I just let it out. Go ahead like you explain where I go Like far away when you come in in the kitchen. It's because you always want to punch me you want to punch her Oh god, this is so silly. Does it you fucking know you fucking rat time out Was the story with the girl with the black eye was that Rudy? Wait a minute. What is he how? Where does he punch you let her talk? Where does he punch you? Where? Yeah, like on the arm or in the stomach or on the what does he do arm? He hits you on the on the arm hard

Sometimes hard sometimes hard come over here. Come punch me how he hits you come here. No I want to feel it. I want to feel how hard it gets you And be real, okay, I'll be I'll be I'll be you and you be Bob. Okay ready. Yeah, okay. Oh, hi tita Bobby Hi Oh Good morning Okay, honestly. Yeah, that was hard I've never hit her that hard. I I just saw the weight of it

But can I tell you something you don't know your strength? Okay? So maybe you are hitting her harder than you think and she's a little tiny little girl. I do it as a joke Yeah, what's that? I do it as a joke. Oh you hit women as a joke No playful in a playful way. Oh, oh, it's funny So here's what here's a deal now that I hear it now, right? I hear it. Oh, I hear it now, right? Yeah Yeah, I won't do that again. Okay. So is that the reason why you you don't come to me with your feelings and your and and what you're going through?

No, yeah, what is it? You don't trust me I No, I trust you. I just got at the Kalayla Okay, but let's say this. What do you think it would take from bobo? For you to say I want to tell you something personal that's bothering me What would it take? I don't know You don't know

Because the communication seems open. He seems like he's really well willing to do something No, like even when we get into the car today, right? I go we'll go coming here. Yeah, and I go um Hey I open with that Hey, you you know creepy aunt. Yeah, did I not do that? Yeah Hey, I didn't do anything. I just looked at her and go Oh, I did one of those things because you could tell she was upset. I make one of those noises, too. I go You you know you're doing okay

Right. Yeah, she was okay Not fine. Yeah, she's not fine. You're not fine. So she can't Really get that. No, I see Tita Bobby as like the fun and like always positive Um uncle that's nice. Here's another yeah, and I'm tired of you calling Kalilah your sister Right who she's your aunt, right?

And you call me uncle. Yeah All right, so maybe that has maybe it's because you put me in a role Right. Yeah, you put me in a some weird like adult role Because you're old Okay, well bro, bro, she's 19 you're 49 you are very much the grown-up in this situation Like okay, but she's an adult a young adult and you are a what's the word you used? Um, Tito. No, no, no what you said he is what he's old old. No, you're an old adult. Okay Okay, so let me like gross old. Yeah, I'm not and I'm not offended by the word old, right? But you're old

Okay, you stop Whatever you're doing right now. I'm not doing anything. You're getting me all riled up time out. Let's take a break All right, let's help It was this girl that used to She would comic and her comedian boyfriend used to punch her Oh my really. Yeah, it was crazy. I gotta know the name. I'll tell you later But um, it would be I would be like in north hollywood at a bar show It should show up with scratches on her face. Oh my god

How'd you know was performing here? You know what I mean? She did it again. You know what I mean? And this guy is still around. He's killing it. He's doing well But back in the then it was like the old west and at comics acted, you know a fool they acted crazy back then Sure. Yeah, I mean, but also acting crazy hitting somebody is a little it's way too much. That's different Yeah, that's not being like a drunk who you know Who who who throws up at the bar to improv and pulls their dick out? Which that happened at the improv. I saw that. Yeah, that's different than hitting a woman in the fit I mean, come on, right and and speaking of hitting women. So are you no longer gonna hit Rudy?

That's a permanent thing. I I I thought it was a joking, but don't you think I know and I bet you it was loving But don't you think now she gets to hit you a few times. Isn't that only fair? She can hit me all what she wants No, why? I'm not violent You love knives Yeah, you're a you're a secret violent crazy person. You just are pretending that you're this sweet Everyone loves online Rudy's personality your other uncle what not your uncle, but your great uncle chopped

His brother in half with a machete Yeah, oh, yeah Oh, yeah, I forgot about that my grandfather Your grandfather your grandfather. He took a machete. Yeah, not kidding you went to her His brother says or her other grandfather, right? Just a commissary, right? And in the torso just this part, right? Sliced him in complete half, right? Imagine the the blood

Right, right, and he just he went to prison got out You can get out. You can do that. That's what's great about the philippines. You cut someone in half By the way, you you go to prison for life for weed. Yeah, yeah here you cut someone in half And and and so one time you'll be out in 15 years and I knew this about him So when I met it is that guy for the first time. Yeah. Oh my god. I nearly suck this I was like I went I gave him a hug. He's a great I go whatever you need, man I sort of got whatever you need man. He killed his brother. Yeah, and why why what was it? Why money?

Money, you know, it's always money. Isn't it? Yeah, dude, he cut up his brother in half because how much money do you know? um I think his brother, I don't know sold the house To get money and then he got angry He's like a Japanese kid went to school in France right in this Japanese kid. This is really happened recently. No, like 20 years ago. I went to school in France and um you could look it up, but um

He was in boarding school or whatever And his his parents were wealthy and he just decides one day. I don't know what came over him You know, we have bad days, you know, he decides to eat somebody and um You know, he just kind of had that mind like I want to eat that lady, you know, so he eats another student Wow. Yeah, yeah whole like head to toe. I don't know what he I I've never eaten a human So I don't know what the good parts are I don't know what the good parts are. Yeah, and then what happened was uh, it's a sagawa sagawa. Was that him? Yeah, it's gotta be known as the carat known as the what?

Yeah The the Kobe the Kobe cannibal. That's a cool name. Yeah, it's really good And then his parents were so rich. They got him out of france Oh, so he was never extradited back to frant. He went back to no he was in france when it happened He got to japan and they never took him back. No, he was able to come out of france And then he just was never charged right now. He's just walking around that's what i'm saying They never extradited him back that story at parties. Look at this guy and he's 71 and he's still alive a long time ago Then he's 71. He's still doing it 50 years. He got arrested but released two years after pre-trial detention

Wow bad bad and then he was yeah, so like in some parts of the world, you know, you can eat somebody And it's all good. Well, it depends on how many people are starving. It's like a misdemeanor. Yeah It's like a parking ticket. Yeah. Yeah, you get a cannibal ticket. Yeah, uh speaking of france. So, uh, I just read this morning The police this is happening all over the world. The police just broke up an 81 person orgy 81 people from all over the world. They flew in from nine countries and they got fined. This is the funniest part They got fined. They got fined because of covid laws. Yeah, guess how much guess how much they each got fined every person 81 135 dollars. That's it. That's a lot. That's nothing for an orgy people flew for an orgy Yeah, they flew across the world to fuck somebody eight hundred three five dollars is nothing

I'll pay that fine. I want to go to the orgy. How come I don't get invited to these orgies. Have you been in orgy? No, no, I'm gonna be real. No, I'm serious. I've never been in orgy. I've never been to one. I've never seen one I want to see him. I want to go. I've been in orgies before A free orgy. You've never been in a free orgy and I instigated it I don't want to get into it, but I was the one that let's do it today How many people is an orgy mine was six? What makes an orgy more than four? I don't know what it is I don't know what the rule can you Google what makes an orgy what makes an orgy But mine was six an orgy is a wild party, especially when involving excessive drinking and unrestrained sexual activity

That's all I'm having orgies all the time. Yeah Wait, there's gotta be and that's an oxford. That's oxford dictionary said that an orgy has to be a number, right? Yeah Because like Greek orgies. Uh-huh. There were there were like 50 to 100 people. I think how fun that would be. Yeah What a party and by the way, I'm afraid to fuck pull my dick on everyone laughing. No one's paying attention You don't think so. No, you know how embarrassing would that be though? You show up you're like, hey guys, and then everyone just does an applause break the record stops I would probably put it back on and leave

Do you know why you know why orgies were invented? Why do you know why seriously? So guys in the hub above of it all when all this like everyone's fucking and sucking and moaning So a guy that wanted to fuck guys. Yeah could sneak it in and be like, oh, I didn't I didn't know I wasn't really 100% Yeah, it's so guys could write in a guy's butt and be like, oh, I just thought you were a girl But at this point it's like Okay, let me ask you this if you were an orgy, right and you're fucking girls close them as I'm doing it right Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right and all of a sudden you know like all of a sudden like um Um before he died dust and diamonds there

Oh, all right, please Jesus christ soon Literally, just suppose dust and diamond was a rest in peace screech. You were great. You're a great dude And you know, he's having sex. I don't know if he was a great dude. I take that back He's having sex with a woman, right? Yeah, and you look at his ass cheeks And they're the perfect asses you've asked you've ever seen like his ass is so nice. It's so nice. Yeah, would you just? Yeah You would No, would you stick to dick dick in there? No, you know what for me boys butts are too hairy. No, but it doesn't even it's like

It's like a brazilian woman's butt. Oh, then yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It has the tan lines and everything Oh, it's got that Yeah, and it sticks out then. Yeah, and jiggle jiggle jiggle jiggle, right? His whole body is white, but his ass for some reason is super perfectly tan. Yeah What is that seven is probably a really mild semi orgy Oh, so I have one really wasn't in one you haven't had one you had seven you need seven But but also so the six that you had. Yeah, how do you how do you? What do you say do you switch out condoms?

Do you I don't know because it'd be weird to like use a condom Let's say you're doing guys and girls. You're fucking some guy in the ass, right? Yeah, you pull it out There's some shit and you see a vagina. Do you stick a pack go go in there or do you? Yeah, I guess I don't know but I would I imagine that most of these unbridled orgies don't have condoms Oh, yeah, yeah, you would do that weird. You know, you don't you think yeah, there's no way Yeah, otherwise it otherwise those should be sponsored by Trojan. They should put some money in the orgy game But I just think how do you first of all all this means to me when I read it what I really wanted to talk about was How do you get invited to that kind of 81 people right?

I'm not don't laugh at me I want to know how you get invite. That's a privilege Your six people are people that you knew correct No, I I I tell you about the Asian orgy that I almost got involved in Famous Asian or Asian orgy Sometimes after sets at the comedy store, right? I go to the fucking um carneys carneys. I know I've been with you It's embarrassing. All right, and I get the chocolate. I know why do you get that so delicious? It's I love bananas and chocolate you love a chocolate banana

So it's frozen and I'm like a little kid. Yeah sucking on a black dick on sunset walking down sunset And then I love yeah, and I love one like fans will come out of the showroom and they'll walk to their cars Whatever no good job, and I'll always do like a dick suck And they always get to laugh. Yeah, of course like a great job Like that it gets a huge laugh, right? So this time it was like maybe one one three in the morning And I'm walking back and this is when I was dating sarah a girl girl. I remember her. Okay, so yeah Yeah, never mind. I'm not gonna say her name. All right. So I was um in the hiatus there, right? There was probably 200

Asians all dressed in white a white party Right. Yeah, and I and then this is when like Um mad tv. I was on mad tv So I was on a show and and Asians especially because I was the only really guy You're the Asian guy on tv. So they all knew who I was right? Yeah, they go. Oh my god. It's bobby lee, right? And they go you want to come up? They go what's going up there and at the chocolate you know i'm sucking right getting trying to get laughs, right?

And they're like, let's we had we're a sex club You immediately you're like this is fake. Yeah, I go No, uh, what? What is it? Yeah, we ran it out of the whole floor And you're invited. I mean usually that's a club. It's a club, but you can come up And I go I don't know what it was. So I go all right. I'll go I'm gonna go would you go right? I'm there in my mind, right? So you know how hotel rooms the doors

Each door is there's a door that's locked to the other door. Those are all open So you can walk through pass through pass through all these right these rooms. Wow, right, right? Yeah So there's music right and you know At first nothing goes happening people are just talking right is anybody's tail end of my chocolate thing You know my face is all chocolate it up right My tail and and then all of a sudden like dudes are just taking their clothes off Are they we're just making out are these people hot? Oh my god. People are hot. No, so everybody's hot. Yeah

I'm the oh, I'm the only guy there obviously. Yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't if I didn't have mad tv I would never be invited. You're right. Okay, plus you didn't have white on so those guys You know me kissing girls and I was kind of walking around like I gotta get out of here. Were you talking anybody? No, no just by yourself So I go to this room and I go this seems like a nice room. There's candles, right and there's no guys It's all women. Oh, right. Yeah, so there's these two girls on the bed I'm sitting there on like it's just a hotel chair Right, my favorite fall chocolatey. I'm trying to think to myself

Should I um have a cigarette on the bucket is weird, right? Yeah, but no, I'll watch and they're hooking up Oh, yeah, they're eating each other. Oh, it's great. Nice cover your ears Okay, yeah I go but I should go because I was living with Sarah at the time You're allowed to watch. I know exactly. I'm watching so right. I was gonna you know what? I'm gonna nut in my pants Because I was about to nut my pants. Yeah, right. Yeah, just explode without even touching. It was amazing. That's when your dick is going like this It's begging to get out right and then I see the girls look at me. Yeah, right and they got they start whispering Meanwhile when they're whispering my penis is going

Like juice is coming out, right? Yeah, and also I'm like all my like spidey senses are Like you like you're you're you're in a territory Yeah, well, you don't want to be here. Correct. Right. Yeah, but I can't move can't move Right, you ain't going nowhere. My body's like leave, but I'm not leaving. No, you can't. Yeah, I know you can't. Yeah, all right So they get up from the bed Right walked are you they walk toward me, right? And one girl starts kissing my neck

And I go like this I go With my hand like this No, like this and I run out Wow, yeah, the control the control dude a hot naked chick comes up. I regret that moment every single day What good I should have done it, but I should have fucking done it. I regret it. I regret it. I'm not with her Wait, when you were in the elevator Did was it not run into your head to be like fuck this shit? I'm gonna go. I gotta go back up I gotta go back. I know because the one thing that I can say about myself

Is I've never cheated on anybody and you were committed. You were like, I'm not gonna do it with two random girls in this hotel I wanted to and I wish I did. Yeah, you did. Yeah, but I didn't in your mind. You did I didn't because it just goes again You wanted to I wanted it so bad, but it goes against everything that I believe but but also. Yeah Yeah, you don't know those girls What would you do done in that situation? There's no way I would have been genuinely. Yeah, I would have never If a guy was like come upstairs. We're having a sex party. Yeah, I know to be like That is trouble. I'm no way. I'm going up there. Right. I shouldn't have gone up there

Yeah, because I knew you know because by the way, yeah, if you go up there At that point you should fuck. Yeah, you went up You already did it. Yeah, go do it. Yeah, you did it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What is this? What is this guy? Oh, yeah. Oh my god the religious guy. Okay. This guy's great So what is he look at this though? By the way, because god we talked about save We talked about saving you on the show a lot No, we've talked about saving people people being saved by religion. Oh, yeah, remember my buddy who was saved You know, yeah, look at this this guy's out here saving people and I want to give him a lot of credit

This guy's great. Don't watch porn. Pray with me instead My friend started this new hashtag prayer watch porn and I guarantee that you maybe have been feeling a little bit tempted Or maybe you were about to watch something. Okay. How much does this guy love porn? Too much the the fact that he's got to say it out loud. It's too much. That means he's obsessed be put away. Yeah No, he needs to go to like a six-month like lockdown. These guys deserve to be in prison for this Yeah, this is prison this the fact that he's got to say You as you should pray to not watch porn. Yeah means his addiction was so violent Yeah, that it was like, you know what I saw and I'll never forget to do my first time in new york

So my first time I ever was in new york and I was I was going to visit my buddy in brooklyn and I was like I'm gonna take the train. You know what I mean? Like I'll do the new york thing. I'm not gonna take a cab. I'm taking the fucking train the moment I get on the L train a guy is on his phone watching porn dick in hand. Yeah, I was like should have taken a fucking cab That's this guy by the way. Yeah, that's this guy. He's watching it in public You see have you ever seen someone watch it in public? Watch porn in public. No, never. I feel like I see people do it. I catch people all the time watching porn in public No, really? Yeah, maybe it's my group of friends. No, it's just that it's just I don't really um

Well, I haven't been out in so long. I know but I don't walk by and people are watching I always think they're watching the avengers or something Or you know, we have some cool things. I saw a guy at the comedy store watching porn in the or Drunk his fuck in the back of the room watching porn on his phone. Yeah, and honestly, I didn't blame him Well, I saw I you know, there used to be I didn't blame him at all. Um a series of porn I think was I forgot what company was but they rented paulie's house To do porn to do porn which one the one above the story the old the old one the old one way on the hill You're right, and every time I would watch them. I go. Oh, yeah, I've been you know

I'm like, I've been there man. Isn't that kind of nice? Yeah. Yeah, that's kind of nice to be like I I've been to that porn Yeah, yeah, yeah, especially when Wait, did he get did they get paid good money for that? I don't but you know how he just rents that that place out Would you ever rent your house out for porn? No, look at me Porn company comes and goes Bob if if I was fans of you. Okay, if I wasn't in I say Kira is producing it I've um, no because I have fucking jewels in the house. I have dogs. You kick her out. You're not there while they're doing it Oh, yeah, um, it depends on where I am financially They come to you and they go look we're gonna rent the house out and we'll give you we'll give you 15 grand

No, I don't need it. We'll give you 25 grand. No, we'll give you 50 grand No, we'll give you 100 grand. Okay, how fast can you be out? Yeah, how many how much do you need it for one day? Yeah, go ahead 100 grand, but we're gonna get come on everything There's already come on everything Wow, what would you do? I well, you know, that's a you know a thing and I got a text from a friend Yeah, the other day that goes I couldn't be more annoyed with you right now Why I go context and he goes your stupid fucking show is filming on my street all week

So like, you know, they cuz they get you know, they put up a notice that says I'm filming on your yeah in your neighborhood And and I was like, oh dude Sorry, yeah, that's gotta be a bummer because they block the streets, you know That's a whole thing And he's like this guy's house that we're filming in he rents it out all the time for people that don't know people in Los Angeles they rent out their houses for film shoots all the time And they give you like, I don't know 10 to 20 grand depending on how long they use the house But they wreck the house. We wreck the house. I mean like it. Yeah, you wreck it

And every time I always think what I I would never rent my house out to a Hollywood production Never never because you fuck it up You fuck it up you leave shit everywhere things get banged and knocked and broken everything gets broken the drawers I always look to the drawers. Yeah Because sometimes the green room is in some kids room. It's a kids room, right and you're in there It's like you can tell that like pictures up and somebody kid lives there somebody lives And I go through things This this one one time we were at it

What were we shooting and we were in someone's house and they had and they had tape on the doors that said do not enter Guess what? Yeah, how am I not going to check it out? I gotta know what's in there when I was shooting magnum and um We were shooting on the street and this fucking guy with a MAGA hat Um, right. Mm-hmm comes in he interrupts the uh, I hear action he interrupts the scene and he goes You guys are taking jobs away from Hawaiians And he walks away and the boom rock operator. It's this gigantic brown guy. You know what I mean with tattoos holders, but

He's holding and just I'm Hawaiian bro. Yeah, we'll be right back Do you have any games today Rudy has a project that she wants to pitch to you guys Yeah I have a school presentation. Oh great. This is exciting. Oh, yeah, she seems amped about it Do you see her face? Yeah, I can tell that you're done before we do this. Can I talk to you? Yeah, yeah, yeah, get into her heart man. Are you sad? No Can I be real with you for a second if you ever need to talk to someone about are you on your phone? I'm gonna do the oh the presentation

If you ever need to talk to someone about panic attacks or anxiety, you know, you can you can always text me She I'm being serious never Maybe she will text you you'll text me. She will never I swear to god She'll never text you I suffer from anxiety and depression very much and I got to tell you if you ever need if you ever want advice If you ever if Kalyla and I died for some reason right and she was homeless Yeah, right and she needed a sandwich you'd probably be the last person she'd go to last Yeah, because there's Wow, yeah, and let that seep into your fucking heart

That's I mean all the stuff I've done for you is pretty remarkable. It's crazy. I know I've done so much nice stuff for you Yeah, why don't we see your fucking presentation? Little shit All right, what is it? Oh, I like this. Oh the grateful dad Oh, let's see rude. Let's hear it. Hello everyone. Hello. I'm Rudy And I'm gonna be presenting the grateful dead wonderful Oh, sorry No, you don't clap. Oh

my bad So there as you can see there are a lot of names but the first The first ever that um the first people that formed the grateful dead were jerry gershia bob wire close phil lesh

and bill kruitzman And then the other few were when those four or no those three left and then they replaced them right on and then Other the other names of the band are the other ones. You have to the dead I like it legion of mary dead and company and rat dog rat dog, baby dog dog, baby and then the fans names are called the fans name is called Deadhead dead heads exactly dead heads. Yeah, and then those are the genres of the grateful dead

Rock psychedelic rock blues rock and etc. Yes, and you're missing one of the members Who's the newest guitar member? Who's the newest guitar player? He's not up there Um John mayor John mayor. Yeah, he's not up there. Why is he not up there? I forgot you forgot. It's a John mayor playing for the good dead. Yeah, I didn't know that. Are you serious? Yeah Yeah, he's yeah, okay. Do you know he's I won't get into it It's like probably one of the best modern guitars of our time. I'm still presenting. Can I say this then genuinely? I know I know you are but can I just say that so let me interject one question one of the best guitars

Of our time. He's great. No, no one of the best guitars of our time. I want to see something even more controversial though. Oh boy Here we go. Okay. I think that adam Lambert Is better than freddie mercury next slide That that picture of them was the first um Show that they did. Oh cool. And then they they began as the warlocks and formed early 1965 in Palo Alto, CA Palo Alto, California an extremely wealthy area of northern california where stanford university is

And then the name grateful dead was chosen from a dictionary and it meant the soul of a dead person Or his angel showing gratitude to someone who arranged their burial Burial, but yes, don't correct her. Well, it is burial in the Philippines. They're called burial burial. Yeah I went to his funeral and burial. Yeah Next slide, please Fun fact Say no to drugs Okay

In 1970 the band was going to perform at the warehouse in new orleans Yes And at the night of january 31 police raided their hotel and arrested 19 people with possession of various drugs No, that's disappointing. I never thought that band was into that kind of stuff. That's disgusting Okay During their europe 72 Tour pigpence health one of the members deteriorated to the point where he could no longer tour with the band He died on march 8 1973. That is his picture. That is his picture

He's known for his he is known for his long beard. Thank you. Thank you That is his picture. Can you imagine if it was a picture of somebody else? Yeah, that that is a friend of his. Yeah I'm gonna be telling this slide. I'm gonna be telling you of the deaths of the members This is amazing. Give us the deaths, baby on february 1975 keith and donna gene God Just just try for it. God show. They were both like a couple. No shit Two random people with the same fucked up last night. I'm just telling you because you didn't you might not know When keith and donna met they're like, you're a god shot too

They left the band but then keith died in 1980 because of a car accident. Oh, that's right Um midland the keyboardist of grateful dad for 11 years died due to narcotics overdose in 1990 Then shortly jerry gershia the main singer Garcia's house started to decline and then gershia was in a diabetic coma for several days in july 1986 Later died on august 9 1995. Wait, wait. He was in a coma for nine years Several days. No days a few days. Wait, wait in he garcia was in a diabetic coma for several days in july of 86. Okay I thought he stayed in a coma for nine years and he played the whole time

He died in 1995 Next slide, please My high school girlfriend's brother had a had his hand, you know, he only had four fingers on one of his hand And he had you know, his handprint on a poster in In his room and it always intimidated me because his hand was so big and her brother hated me. Go ahead The grateful dad performed the last concert on july 9 1995 at soldier field in chicago And that year was when joey gershia died Joey joey jerry jerry gershia died

Whoa. All right, relax Why she yells Okay, and their legacy the grateful dad formed during the era when bands such as the Beatles the Beach Boys and the Rolling Stones were dominating the airwaves That's right. They were part of the process of establishing what psychedelic music was They were the pioneering godfathers of jam ban world And they sold more than 35 million albums worldwide. That's impressive impressive And you can buy their merchandise. Are we we're plugging their merch on the show? No, I'm just saying

Okay, is that what else that is all. Thank you for listening. Wait, you gotta talk. You have to have some kind of ending Because she was just doing thank you for listening. Go ahead. I mean she has a big thing plan. Go ahead Read the thing. I mean say it what you're gonna say That is all. Thank you for listening Goodbye That was the big thing Thank you for listening. Goodbye That's your thing. You were banking on thank you for listening. Goodbye

That was it. How about this? Let's let's let's add one more piece right now just to end it Uh-huh. I want you to give us kind of a summation of What the group is and means to you and why they're important to music. Go ahead. Yeah, and without looking at them notes. Go ahead The group is a rock band formed in the 1980s I think and then it's your book report. What the band means to me is Their use of drugs

Because when you see them perform, they are more enjoyable when they use drugs. That's correct I've never had I've never had a more accurate Description in my life them to a tee. That's perfect. Yeah, just a bunch of drug addicts Now you look in the camera right now. Yeah, and you say thank you for for listening About me and grateful that am I broke important? Thanks for being a bad friend. You take us out Thank you for listening to me on my class discussion on the grateful dead Thank you for being a bad friend

Hello fresh. Oh my god, you know, I love hello fresh Andy. No I mean don't fucking call me Andy you cunt. Why I hate it. It doesn't matter. You call me bob. I hate that Okay, fine. You're right. Okay. One two three. Hello fresh. You know what?