Bad Friends - One Million Subscribers & Happy Birthday Andrew

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Starting point is 00:00:28 Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. I'm Thomas B. Jefferson, the Adam's the third. And I'm William Randall's guest on... Yes. The first.

Starting point is 00:00:42 The first. We're coming to Washington DC. We're coming to Washington DC. This weekend. October 21st, here we... Here we, here we, here we. We're coming to Washington DC this weekend 21st here we're 24 here we're gonna be here in DC this weekend You got to come out and see the boys go to bad friends pod dot com next weekend We're in Denver then Milwaukee Chicago Minneapolis and then Madison with this weekend Washington DC Come to Washington DC. I'm respect your forefathers go to badfriends pod.com Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, Happy birthday I got you I have two presents. I have one coming in the mail. This hasn't come yet But I got you one gift sushi

Starting point is 00:01:28 Well, they'll open it. Okay. Are you gonna be real? I hope it's sushi. It's not come on. Oh, dude What is it happy birthday, buddy? What did you get me from my birthday? Did you get me anything? Yeah, I got you. That's a lie. No, I really got you one Oh, wow Did you get me anything? Yeah, I got you. That's a lie. No, I really got you one. Oh, wow. You don't like it? Wow. Who told you to get this? No one.

Starting point is 00:01:54 You liar. A brand new pro X3. Pro X3. Something something. A brand new range finder for the golf course. This is so nice. Yeah, it's a nice one Oh, did you open it up? Why is it not rent? I don't know why they sent it me that way So it's been used you bought a used right? I got it didn't you bought me a used right? I got it for my birthday

Starting point is 00:02:15 I think it's right straight from the fucking range find the place is this wish calm. No, I got it from I'll give you You never see it. I don't know why came that way. This is so cool. This is like the one of the best models I know I got you it. I have another thing. This is so cool. This is like one of the best models. I know, I got you. I have another thing better even coming. Even better than this. Really? I can't believe it, yeah. Wow, I can't even believe that this is real right now.

Starting point is 00:02:33 I feel like there's a scam, it's gonna explode. No, no, no, no, no. Happy birthday, dude. Thank you, dude. I love you. Because you know, I've never given you anything. That's right. And there was a sense of guilt.

Starting point is 00:02:43 They're shooting shame. And this is so nice. Yeah, and I did some research. You did. Yeah, I've never researched it. And I usually get like standard shit. Yeah. Starbucks card. You know, I mean, nothing. Nothing is the most. Yeah, it's my favorite gift to give is nothing brand new. Nothing from the factory. I gotta tell you, sometimes a brand new nothing is incredible. It's incredible, dude. And can I say? Yeah.

Starting point is 00:03:06 Best gift I've gotten in years. I mean, real. I sort of got to be away for the second one. That you gonna love it. Okay. Okay, mine. Okay, let's see what it is. Ooh, I'm excited for this.

Starting point is 00:03:14 And by the way, in the meantime, we're celebrating our one million subscriber. Ha! Ha! Ha! Can I just say that, though? That's what I'm gonna call the chicken a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken.

Starting point is 00:03:30 I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. I'm not going to be a chicken. Oh no the jolly yeah jolly be wait you got your jolly beat I didn't cook this okay

Starting point is 00:03:47 Why did you have to touch it? Oh? Happy birthday, dude. Thank you, dude. Yeah So good I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm so good So good I'm gonna eat oh you came in with one single piece of chicken Where was this transported inside of a bucket? Where's the bucket? There get the bucket get the bucket. No trust me don't trust it. Just before wait wait wait wait Let me say something. There's more than one chicken finger in the bucket. He gets one

Starting point is 00:04:18 Whoa, whoa give me the bucket give me the bucket. Okay. Let me just be honest. I didn't give you a gift Yeah, I know. Shit, no shit, oh my god. Oh my god. How dumb do you think I am? This was for the Filipino American ones. What? That's how I feel.

Starting point is 00:04:36 That's how I feel about Filipino American. Clean it up, McCone, right now. Get in here and pick up the chicken off the floor. I did it in first of all vote for it. I want to check no on it. Insane. Insane, dude. You didn't get me a gift and then you brought me a fake offering.

Starting point is 00:04:53 It was a fake offering. A fake offer. What's in your purse? I have to sanitize. Me too. Why do you have to sanitize? What are you doing in just before? It's wrong with the picket. You have to sanitize it. I mean, look before? Yeah, it's jolly good. It's jolly.

Starting point is 00:05:06 Yeah, sanitize it. I mean, look at how greasy my fingers are. I didn't eat it. Look at my hands. Yeah. They're shining. Can the is the light bouncing off of them? Just to help me the hands sanitizer. It was a jewel. Duel. It's embarrassing. We see it as a literally in the hands. What is that? Jolly bean abgans? Come on. Yeah, I'll take that. What company is it from? I'll try to buy a gig. Those are fine.

Starting point is 00:05:27 I'll try to buy an gig. Happy Filipino American. American. Yeah. Wait, I bought Filipino snacks. Oh, you really did? Yeah. Where?

Starting point is 00:05:38 Hold on. McCone, please get them. So she's running it out of the room. It's insane. You could have sat in your chair the whole time. We could have had someone do. Why do we hire these people to be at the studio if they're not gonna do work? Oh, so what, I thought we're doing

Starting point is 00:05:46 the one million celebration fucking episode. That's kind of my birthday, but kind of not at all. Look at this. Oh, whoa, whoa, okay, here we go. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll introduce it.

Starting point is 00:05:58 Wait, so wait a minute, let me make something clear. My best friend on Earth, Bobby Lee, gave me an incredible gift from my birthday, which I am genuinely very appreciative of. Did not get a gift from you or you or you did I did I also Can I just say this to wow on my birthday? We did a fucking we did a thing get bad friends from Bobby Lee Birthday right nothing for my friend here man nothing for me. I sidekick. Is that what I get? I did talk to your wife about what I should get you, etc. So and So it's on the way we're good. It's on the way with his gift Bobby's is here

Starting point is 00:06:31 No, but he has another one on the way. Okay, even better. He has more to come you have zero here My business like Hanukkah Everyday you got one every day you get one for the week. I'm offended Honestly, I'm at it all three of you. Yeah, it's disgusting. It's disgusting. It's disgusting. What? Oh, okay.

Starting point is 00:06:49 So these are my favorite. I'm gonna take a minute to say a million subscribers on YouTube. Okay. Happy birthday. A million subscribers on YouTube. We want to thank the fans so very much for being here for us. This is incredible. We were, this is such a pinnacle.

Starting point is 00:07:04 It's a pinnacle. In fact, I had, Let's get to two. I ran into a guy today who said to me, and I mean this, and we do really love the fans. We appreciate you guys so much. It's been incredible.

Starting point is 00:07:13 The show Boston was unbelievable. I believe it was immense. It's been so cool, and I will say this about a fan. He came up to me and he goes, I'm a Patreon, I'm a subscriber to the Patreon, and he goes,

Starting point is 00:07:24 I gotta tell ya, I'm a little bummed because I get excited for Mondays, but now I see the episodes on Friday, and now I feel empty on Monday. And I said, so we do an extra special one for him every Monday? Just for that guy. Yeah, okay.

Starting point is 00:07:38 His name is Michael Nioh. Nioh? Michael Nioh. Nioh, okay. Let's see some of this Filipino American food you've got for us, forgetting my birthday. Okay, so these were my favorite snacks in the Philippines growing up growing up Okay, pull one at a time. It's a bag of live bugs. We're just gonna eat live bugs. Okay, first one Cheese ring cheese ring. Okay. Are they onion ring? Are they like no onions, onions? Funnians, because I know you got,

Starting point is 00:08:05 let us open them. You know what a funnian is? The onion rings? Forget it. Okay, try this. Yeah, please. Let's look at the packaging. Let's rank them.

Starting point is 00:08:18 Well, let's look at the packaging and rank it. First of all, is that Japanese? It seems Japanese. It seems Japanese. And there's a Fuck a Swedish girl in the fucking business Swedish in Sweden. I don't know why she's so white She's flavored snack It's a bus. Yeah, you know what it looked like I mean

Starting point is 00:08:40 Why is it so puffed up? Okay, okay Why is it so puffed up? I don't know. Okay. Okay. Whoa, how does it smell? Whoa, first smell. Okay, first smell. First smell, a foot comes to mind. That's a foot. Just do it.

Starting point is 00:08:53 That's your favorite food as a kid. Is it Mongo's toenail flavor? That's what it smells like. Mongo's toenail flavor. That is so gross. I can eat it. We have to. Now we have to try one.

Starting point is 00:09:04 I can eat it. We can spit it Now we have to try one. Yeah. We can spit it out of the bag. So it's like a fucking. It's a little pro-laptainus. It's Donald Trump's asshole. Look at that. It's a little Trump. Donald Trump's asshole, right?

Starting point is 00:09:13 That's a Donald Trump pro-laptainus. And we're going to eat it live on the show. Yeah, okay. Here we go. Try one. He likes it. He actually likes it. Well, when it comes to taste and smell,

Starting point is 00:09:27 let me see. Completely different. Okay, so the smell is atrocious taste. Yeah, yeah, don't smell it. Okay, I'll just hold my nose. Fantastic. Yeah, it's pretty good. I know, you go through it away, I'll keep it.

Starting point is 00:09:41 This is just like the Philippines. Don't smell it. You don't just enjoy it. I've had... Calyla, I'll keep it. This is just like the Philippines. Don't smell it. You don't just enjoy it. I've had, Kalayla, I never smelled her pussy. Just enjoy it. I just ate it. Oh. Really?

Starting point is 00:09:53 Because if you smell that, you want it. You're out. You won't want it. These are really good. But what you taste it, it's like cheesy. Wow. All right, nice. I can die a re-a-d.

Starting point is 00:10:00 We might get diarrhea though. Yeah, okay. Next one, piatos, the sour cream and onion. They're just chips, right? Yeah. Yeah, piatos, piatos. By the way, the comedy is made by Jack and Jill. Flavor potato chips, okay.

Starting point is 00:10:15 Svela first. Again, dude. Let me smell first. Oh my God, again, it's like footy. Vah? Feet, feet, feet, feet, feet. Oh my God, that's too much. Oh my God, that's the other one, dude. Are we gonna get feet feet feet feet feet feet. Oh my god. Oh my words How the other one dude? Oh, we gonna get sick is this gonna make it sick? Yeah, maybe okay great great

Starting point is 00:10:30 Yeah, this is like a Simone armpit Have you ever smelled a Simone armpit? Of course. Yeah, I've been to the island. Yeah, it's like I don't know Let's try one you have to try one now also can I also visually? Yeah, really bad. Really bad. What? This is terrible. No design whatsoever.

Starting point is 00:10:49 No design whatsoever. You know. They're like, what sheep do you even call this? A pent-a-rong. A pent-a-rong. Yeah. This is a pent-a-rong, see? Yeah, let me taste it.

Starting point is 00:11:00 Let's see if it. Give it a whirl. Is it good? You seem like you're still in the middle of judging if it. Give it a whirl. Is it good? You seem like you're still in the middle of judging if it's good, because the aftertaste means a lot in this kind of stuff. Because I still have it visually, so I'm trying to get that rid of my mind.

Starting point is 00:11:14 It's okay. It's not bad. It's okay. Right, right out of 10. Well, the first one I'm gonna give. I'm gonna give this a six. Six, yeah. Out of 10.

Starting point is 00:11:23 It's average. It's like, been there, done that. Cardboardy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, cardboardy. This tastes like what I think a rainbow sandal would taste like a tree acid. Yeah, yeah. After like a San Diego bro war.

Starting point is 00:11:34 Right. Three or four years. Exactly. With a little bit of beach sweat, a little bit of sand in your toes. This is not good, this one's a three. Yeah, yeah, a three. And three is generous. It's pretty generous. Okay, this one is the good. This one's a three. Yeah, yeah. And three is generous.

Starting point is 00:11:45 It's pretty generous. Okay, this one is the best. Okay. The second best. Okay. Pillos. Pillos. Oh, amazing.

Starting point is 00:11:53 They just name everything things they wish they had. Yeah, yeah. What a random thing, right? She's like, next up is blankets and he's... Yeah. This one's called lamp fixtures. Ha ha ha ha ha. Have you guys tried electricity?

Starting point is 00:12:05 All right, here's pillows, a better bag, a better design. I like this kind of heavy, you know what I mean? A heavy rip. And pillows is a Ube filled cracker. Oh, smell first. Oh, really? I like it. I like the smell of, Ube is good for me, baby.

Starting point is 00:12:25 Oh, this is like. That's top notch. You can tell by the packaging it's higher end. Let's see how let's eat some. Yeah, we must test. Yeah, yeah. Three out of 10s, a six out of 10. Well, now, okay, let's look at the, right?

Starting point is 00:12:36 It's a square, I've never seen something so purple. What are we talking? The pillow we said that sound of the crunch is very good. something so purple. What are we talking? The pillow we said that sound of the crunch is very good. High end crunch. I don't like it. You hate it. Let me try. I don't like it.

Starting point is 00:12:53 All right, let me try a pillow. There's something inside of it. I know I can't use it. I don't like it. You know what this looks like? It reminds me of what's that, the cereal, the shit cereal, wheat, thin, or whatever the shit cereal was. It looks like that.

Starting point is 00:13:07 What's inside? Oube. Oube juice is inside? Yeah. Yeah. You don't like it? There's something about it, I don't like. Yeah, because it's like perfume in a fucking chip

Starting point is 00:13:19 or something. I didn't want perfume in the chip. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just gave me a drink or a car in a water inside of it. Yeah, I don't like it. It's a pool, yeah, yeah, you just you just gave me your car noir I don't like it's a water flavor. Okay, by the way, yeah, this is our whatever. This is five. This is below It's a five it's below the cheats below this is the top-branging one right so far looks let's have the night I think it's a white girl that's in the package. That's it. We keep that's what made me like it so I put a whipers on the Fieke pack. I don't know. It's this final. This is the final. This is my favorite. Okay usually eat it with ketchup and rice, but I forgot to bring ketchup.

Starting point is 00:13:47 Is this chicharones? Is that what that is? What's it called? Chicharones is pork skins, as you know. Manguwan, chicharones. Yeah, chicharones, I know. This is the best. This is the best.

Starting point is 00:13:56 Well, you guys call them chicharones. But how do you say it? Because in where fancien I come from, we say chicharones, right? We just say chicharrones. Chicharrones. Chicharrones. Is this because you guys are going to you're disguising yourself as Mexican sometimes? No! Yeah, she is. She goes rogue. So this is how do you say that?

Starting point is 00:14:16 Niemangwan. Manghuay. Oh my god, this has got to be racist. That's pretty racist. One. One. Juan, this is mocking. What does this mean? So I don't know.

Starting point is 00:14:26 Yes, you do. It's a racist because, you know, what, the Spanish, right? Spanish. They colonized, right? And it looked like a little joke with your people, right? And then all of a sudden, some other thing came out. All right, so at first, smell.

Starting point is 00:14:43 Is that real? Wow. Good. It is a heavy, close the bag and open it fast Smell it fast like okay breathe it in ready and Whoa Good yes, it's like smelling salts. I love one. It hits you hard. Yeah, one is my friend By smell alone. I like this most but I like you to run as I'm I am partial to Porkskin let's see what it looks like this most, but I like Chirones. I am partial to, here we go, here we go. Let's see, let's see what it looks like.

Starting point is 00:15:06 Pork skin baby. Yeah, it looks like psoriasis. Yeah, it's been flaked off. It's a flaky psoriasis. Now what hospital were these bags from? Let's try it. This is a scab. It's a scab.

Starting point is 00:15:18 Yeah, yeah. But most pork skin looks scabby. Okay, well, there you go. Yeah, most of the scab. Let me get these afro, yeah, go ahead. Yeah, go ahead. Mmm, the crunch is right. it. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, go ahead.

Starting point is 00:15:27 Yeah, go ahead. Mmm, the crunch is right. Pork skin crunch is almost perfect. When you get the corner of one, you know, hard and burned. I'll go. Excellent. Excellent. Excellent.

Starting point is 00:15:39 So this is number one in your book. Uh-huh. Excellent. Now, how many people in your community have died eating some of these snacks? Not. Yeah, right. Excellent. I mean, perfect.

Starting point is 00:15:49 That's a good one. A hard curl. This means it was fried a little bit longer. There's a little bit more fat on this one. Mm. Excellent. I love pork scums. Excellent.

Starting point is 00:16:00 Hey, give me one more cheese foot. Could I do like cheese foot? I love you, I love you. Thank you for bringing these snacks. This is very nice. And thank you for forgetting my birthday. I do like cheese foot. Thank you for bringing these snacks. This is very nice. And thank you for forgetting my birthday. I really do appreciate it. DT-A-N-S, I call DT-DT-A-N-S.

Starting point is 00:16:10 Yeah, DT-Pro-Lapse, DT-Pro-Lapse. 2024, huh? Trump, Trump. Trump. Second place for sure. These are delicious. We have candy in there too in the Chinese box. Oh, we got candy in the Chinese box too.

Starting point is 00:16:24 So these give you bad bathroom problems, troubles? I used to and I was like, we find it, invisible candy. Invisible candy. This is the invisible candy from last week. What can I tell you something? I've heard through the grapevine since we did this episode. People said that the paper's not edible.

Starting point is 00:16:41 You're not supposed to eat the paper. Not this paper. No, even the inside you're not supposed to eat that either, they said. This paper. Yeah. You're not supposed to eat the paper. Not this paper. No, even the inside, you're not supposed to eat that either, they said. Why? This paper. Yeah. We used to eat that in the food being.

Starting point is 00:16:48 People online say you don't eat the paper. Yeah. Yeah, you got. No, no. Why do the dissolving your mouth like a fucking deliciousness? I'm maybe because it's cancerous. Give me one. Let me try.

Starting point is 00:17:00 This is the infamous white rabbit. Yeah. See, look. See, look. See, look. Eat it. Eat it. You can't chew up. Why can't you chew it?

Starting point is 00:17:12 You suck it up. Are you not sure to be able to chew it? It takes a minute. It hurts. Well, this is a silly candy. It's supposed to look chewable. Not be chewable? Yeah.

Starting point is 00:17:22 It's not puffy. Why did you have it? Why do people love puffy. Why did you have it? Why do people love taffy? Why do you like that taffy so much? Because it reminds us of the sea. Do you like taffy? Fudge, taffy, go fuck yourself.

Starting point is 00:17:32 I've never had a taffy before. Mmm. This hurts my teeth. I'm not even in jail. Oh, flavor. What with the flavor? Flavor is great. What?

Starting point is 00:17:42 It looks like I was like sucking on like a good tasting stone. There's what, there's what, what's with the irishies you're doing there, bored, they wouldn't put sugar on a stone and suck on it for an hour and a half. That's what it says I could do. Get your sound for sugary stone, famous. Shameless, grab your sound for sugar stone.

Starting point is 00:17:59 Yeah, because it's suck on it. I'm doing it. I love it. Hmm, anyway. Where did these come from? Amazon. Yeah, actually, are we gonna die after all this stuff? I feel like no, this is FDA approved. No, this is a quality candy, dude. Oh, go, it's chocolate, my teeth.

Starting point is 00:18:14 I know. Okay, look. You doing it? Yeah, I'm done. I'm done. See, that's the thing about the white rabbit. You think it's fun at the beginning, and then it's, yeah, yeah. It really runs out of steam there.

Starting point is 00:18:27 Well, thank you so much for the birthday gift, Bobbi Lee, and not to anybody else on this show. Thank you so much for the million subscribers. Thank you Rudy for bringing us a taste of the Philippines, and also for me having to get more toilet paper on the way home at CVS, because I can already feel the cheese puffs loading up down below.

Starting point is 00:18:43 Dude, talk about Pooz. I had dinner with Jean Hong. You know Jean, right? Of course. Right. We're eating at our favorite Chinese restaurant in Koreatown. Then we go, let's get some ice cream.

Starting point is 00:18:55 We're in waiting in line ice cream, and I look at them, I go, eight minutes. In eight minutes, in eight minutes, Jean, I'm gonna poo my pants. Eight minutes, fly. I gave him the fucking time, he goes get in the car. That's pretty good to know the time though. Dude, seven minutes and 55 seconds, I enter his house.

Starting point is 00:19:14 As soon as I go to toilet, it came out. It was like, it could have been a disaster, dude. It is funny to think about, it must be in there going like, Yeah, I know. Like when you're one of you guys holding on the ledge building, you know, trying to evade, but I think I know how to like count it out now when.

Starting point is 00:19:28 Your timing is that good. It's so good, dude. And that's what I want to say, I have talent. You do have a lot of talent. You know, there are certain talents I don't, I can't play Batman. You know what I mean? I can't really run the good.

Starting point is 00:19:36 You're not good at horseshoes. I'm not good at horseshoes. Bowling, you're great at blue. Oh, the good boy. You want to play bowling with this guy, don't. Don't even have a ball in my body, because I'm going to beat you. You'll destroy you, dude. Speaking of which, what's this thing doing in front of the picture there of a of a Yeah, it's just like oh one million

Starting point is 00:19:52 Decorate why's in front of you No, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't go anywhere with it leave it right there if you think you deserve it because it's on your picture It's on your life when we're on stage In Boston and we have we're on stage in Boston and we have a girl on stage and I go, you know, what's your name? She says her name and I go, how do you like our pocket?

Starting point is 00:20:11 No, she goes, I fuck Carlos. Yeah, I fuck Carlos. We hooked up that night too. You did. I saw you guys necking at the bar. But okay, so there's 5,000 people there, right? You have to bring your buddy on stage. Is that what the deal is?

Starting point is 00:20:23 She signed up. It was deliberate though. He put her name in. It was deliberate. There's no way. How much easier of it is for him to score when the girl that he's hooking up with gets random. I'm gonna give you a little fame. That's what you did. To get Andrew Pitch. It's shaped fame for pussy. That's what it was. That's what you did that night. And also don't play me for pickin' her. You put her name on the list five times. I think it was a bit, you know, you know I'm like a magician of shuffling card and it's like any card, but this one for sure. That's what he did.

Starting point is 00:20:48 But can I say thank you, because it did help me. You're welcome. Also, that was the third time he had sex with her. Fourth. Whoa. So she's not right. No. I mean, she, I've got judgment a little wrong.

Starting point is 00:20:59 She's off. I don't know how to say anything about her. She probably burns herself in the fucking fire everyone's. Right, just to feel something. No, like accident. Like, oh yeah, that burns, I forgot. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't know what he's off. I don't Did you have to deal with while you were hooking up with her? I had to listen to this. What? Shotgunning beers? Look on the other room.

Starting point is 00:21:29 Who's that guy? So this guy, this guy, what the fuck is that guy? This him all night? He's my cons boyfriend. He showed up to the after party, the little after get together. We all got together. This guy showed up straight out of the outback. I mean, now where do you find people like this?

Starting point is 00:21:44 In a shed, somewhere, being hidden from society. This guy showed up straight out of the outback. I mean, now, where do you find people like this? In a shed, somewhere being hidden from society. This guy is so... He was born in a rave. Born in a... Right, he was born in a rave, dude. It mixed patchouli and molly in a bucket for a few days, and this guy was born out of it. I mean, this guy, what a strange, strange bird. It's a crazy one.

Starting point is 00:22:04 And this is McCone's good buddy. So he was in the, well, you guys were hooking up, they were in the kitchen, shotgunning beers. Yeah, and I could hear you. Why did you bring him back to the place you were hooking up at? Well, McCone brought, well, you got share room. Yeah, I know, but kick them out and make them go.

Starting point is 00:22:16 Wait, wait, you share room. Yeah. We should be sweet on that one. So there's two different rooms. Exactly. Oh, I see. But usually there's not. Okay.

Starting point is 00:22:23 Usually he has to, they have to, yeah. I know that. Yeah. So he came back to the room with Conan out of respect. Carlos put a sock on the door and tell him, come back later, that's the code. That's broke code. You know, you're really living the life, huh? Doesn't deserve it.

Starting point is 00:22:38 It doesn't do shit at the show. True. Right, he takes, I tell you to do one thing. The photo was pretty good, okay, right? But not great, let's be honest. It was fine. It was fine. Okay He takes one photo of me fancy an ad right before I did that and I was just to celebrate sending fancy the ad for last month 3 a.m. Yeah Three in the morning. So you wait until 3 a.m. to send him hey, I did some work at three in the morning

Starting point is 00:22:59 Three in my time So it was it was 6 a.m. You were up till 6 a.m. and you in Boston. The sun was starting to come up a little bit. Wow. Why are we paying? I was also a text you didn't have that text you in the morning. Like, where's the video? Where's the video?

Starting point is 00:23:14 How long did it take me to get it? I was how long did you take me to get it? I'm asking you a question. It's not a fast one. Yeah. He did it in LA when we were trying. Exactly, exactly. He you did it in LA.

Starting point is 00:23:24 He did it in the Uber. You did in the Uber, did you not? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that did it in LA when we're exactly exactly you did it in LA. He did it in the uber You did in the uber. Did you not yeah, that's not professional to I know man. I don't understand happy birthday, man. Thank you, dude I have your birthday. Thank you Bobby. Let's focus on the only one that cares about Buffy you know what but remember dude remember back when we first started hanging a lot Yeah, you got me buffy. I got you a Buffy. And I still have Buffy. And you'll never forget that moment. Buffy makes a word-winning betting

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Starting point is 00:27:00 From Academy Award winning director Martin Scorsese, Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert De Niro, Lelica Adstone. I'm gonna kill these men who killed my family. Oh my god. Killers of the Flower Moon, only in theaters October 20th. Get tickets now. I love you, dude. None of your business. Fuck you. You don't know. You don't ask me. I have no-

Starting point is 00:27:22 Hey, pal, do you have Google? Google it. Oh, okay, pal, do you have Google? Google it. Oh, okay, I'll just... He's not just a... How about you? He's just a random guy who works at fucking somewhere. I guess so. No, this guy Google it.

Starting point is 00:27:32 No, no, no. How old is Andrew Santino? Why don't you guess? I'd like you to guess. Let's see, like in Filipino terms, what am I? 38. Wow, close. Feels good.

Starting point is 00:27:43 39? Pretty close. 40? Pretty close. 42. Pretty close. You're older? Pretty close. 45. Yeah, I'm learning. 47. Oh, pretty close. 48. Oh, pretty close 48 oh Pretty close to hot 40s I know I'm 40. I'm 40. I'm 40 years old. I thought you how does it feel? I thought I thought I was what? I thought I was You know I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm positive. I'm about to do it. I'm about to do it. What? I'm about to go out to that little fuck. Don't call it that thing again, man. Fuckin' piece of shit.

Starting point is 00:28:47 Yeah. Let me tell you something. Yeah, yeah, yeah, let me tell you. You know how quickly we can ship this bottle here, bud? Back on a boat. You'll be back on a boat, making stuff out of bamboo again. Yeah, you will in no time.

Starting point is 00:28:57 I'll have you D. Poor Tim. I'm sorry. No, you're not sorry, darling. You brought me one rogue chicken wing. What a shitty birthday gift. It was guzzled if you'd. Yeah, I'm sure it was. I'm sure it was you can clean a house So I can tell you that they all can't can't they dude? You can clean my house. Can you yeah? Fuck yeah, man I feel 40. How do I feel? I feel I feel 40 I feel for it. It's a milestone. It's a big deal

Starting point is 00:29:22 It's a milestone. It's a big deal. I know. Yeah. I know. You're thinking about it. I don't like it, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Dude, try 50.

Starting point is 00:29:31 Yeah, but. When I turned 50, I was like, is death around, death is around the corner. Somewhere, but not that close. You're fine. It's close, you're closer. Yeah, you're definitely closer. I'm closer than you.

Starting point is 00:29:41 Yeah, well, I feel like you and I will die at the same time. Oh, that'd be great. I think we'll die together. And I'm closer than you. Yeah, well, I feel like you and I will die at the same time. Oh, that'd be great. I think we'll die together. I have dreams of this in a chalet. We'll die in a Swiss chalet. A Swiss chalet. On a mountain. But it's not snowing.

Starting point is 00:29:55 Why isn't it? Because it's summertime. We're in a Swiss chalet in the summertime. There's not a lot of tourists. We're gonna cup a coffee. I'm naked on the patio. Right, I have melted, I don't know why, I have melted chocolate on my body.

Starting point is 00:30:05 What do you mean you don't know why? You know what we just, what do we just do? Why do you know? Yeah, you know. I do, but I don't. The fans won't. I do and I don't. But so I'm out there, you're drinking your thing, I'm naked.

Starting point is 00:30:14 But naked. It's not so much melted chocolate on my body. Tanning a little bit. Tanning, and then for some reason there's like a, with those rubber ducks. Little tiny rubber duckies. Yeah, rubber duckies on the, because I'm making a chocolate lake on my stomach.

Starting point is 00:30:27 Fondue. That's what they call it, right? Fondue. A fondue, right? I got little duckies right. Yeah. My dick. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:30:35 Where's it? In my ass. Yes. No, wait a minute. How did you do that? That's incredible. Pretty good, right? How did you get there?

Starting point is 00:30:43 I got there. I tricked you dude. You know, I see us at a Swiss chalet I know. I got there. I tricked you, dude. I see us at a Swiss chalet, and I see that happening. I see that part of our pinnacle of our friendship, and you know who's not there. What? You gone. You're not there at all.

Starting point is 00:30:54 What's in our chalet? I can see. What's inside of our chalet? There's gotta be a dojo. Oh yeah. There's a dojo for short. What do you think we eat dinner? What?

Starting point is 00:31:02 In the dojo. In the dojo, a Japanese style. Yeah. Take your shoes off. I can't Chris Cross. My knees hurt. In the dojo, a Japanese style. Yeah. Take your shoes off. I can't crisscross apples. My knees hurt so bad when I get down on the ground. Yeah. What do you put that?

Starting point is 00:31:10 What? Can you sit in the end style? You can't say that. Can you sit in the indigenous people's time? What? I can. You can sit. You can.

Starting point is 00:31:19 I can do the old school, the neat, the, the, the, you know how they sit with their knees. Hold on. Let me see. What is it? Let me see. I don't have no idea what that is. Let me get it out. Yeah. The crouching sitting. The Asia Zoo. Oh, yes. What's this right here? What I'm doing? It's smoke. It's smoke attacks it. Yeah, yeah. I'm smoking. Yeah. So I'll show you. You can smoke a text all. I can still do this, dude. That's really good. That's not a low. You got to go lower. That is pretty low. That's pretty fucking low. Crouch. Can you do this? Crouch. Yeah, I can do that. Are you okay? That I can do. But I can't sit. You can sit. Sit

Starting point is 00:31:56 cross like it. Yeah, I can't. Wow, that's interesting. Not right now. Now with my back. There's a new system in California called the Ebony Alert. It's Amber Alert for black people. It just got past that. Wait a minute. It cut it out. It's being real. There's an app that says,

Starting point is 00:32:13 Amber Alert. Amber Alert. But Ebony Alert. Yeah. But why Amber, that doesn't mean that they're white, although white kids probably get kidnapped and more or more than any other kind of kid. Why don't know about that?

Starting point is 00:32:26 Well, they're worth more. That's a street value for a white kid. I think an Ebony alert is needed. I've always paid for one. You know why? Why? Because I want to know that they know that I have them. Right.

Starting point is 00:32:37 Right, you want everyone to know what you're doing. I want everyone, like, because then if I have them, I can go, oh, they know I have it. And then I'll change locations. It's working. It's gonna work. Yeah, yeah, yeah can go, oh, they know I have it. And then I'll, I'll change locations. It's working. It's gonna work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait a minute, you're really being serious

Starting point is 00:32:48 of the thing called Ebony, governor, to California governor Gavin Newsom has signed a new law that can help track down young people of color who have disappeared. And it's called Ebony Alert. Why not just a regular children kidnap alert? And anyway, on Dresden had a funny joke. What is it?

Starting point is 00:33:03 I don't know what he did, but before we did the pocket, we talked about a little bit this Ebony learned. And he said something that was like out of pocket. What did he say? And I want you to him to repeat it. I didn't hear it, but he said. What did you say? I didn't say anything.

Starting point is 00:33:13 Well, can I, may I repeat it? Maybe. Yeah, please. Well, how is that gonna work out? You, you all right? Yeah. How do you know who's who? They all look the same.

Starting point is 00:33:21 That's what the fuck. That's what you said? You scumbag. Did it, McCone? He said it. what the fuck. That's what you said, you scumbag. Macon, Carlos. Yeah. Can I tell you something? When I first looked in the room here and I saw this, and I saw your flag and my flag, I thought,

Starting point is 00:33:34 it's good. I do love my flag. I love my flag. I do like your flag a lot. Let's go see what I like. What are the black lines for? What are the black lines on the Korean flag for? I stand with Korea.

Starting point is 00:33:50 The Guyan bar symbolize air, air, south, summer, the Gim bar symbolize water, west, autumn, the Gan bar symbolize earth, north, winter, and the rebar symbolize fire, east, spring. You guys are doing way too much. Yeah. Yes, I think the sides are a little too much. What did that, the black lines are just so heavy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there was like three,

Starting point is 00:34:14 you know what the three colors on the Irish flag stand for? What? It's really easy to guess. So red heads. The hair. Hair. The skin. The soul.

Starting point is 00:34:22 The soul's not green. Soul green. Symbolize the inclusion in the... Oh, there's that one liquor does your soul. Yeah, turn your green This is a whiskey liver. This is a I see I see I see symbolize the inclusion and the aspiration in unity between people of different traditions is island You know, we don't it means nothing. What is a Filipino flag? I don't even know bring up the Filipino flag I mean, that look like they have one. Yeah,. I mean, they're the ones that make them after all. That's a pretty good flag. That is nice.

Starting point is 00:34:47 Yeah, the sun, the sun. Is that the sun or what is that? It's the sun. Wow. We understand. A little bit of attitude. We get the sun to here. It's the sun.

Starting point is 00:34:58 She actually, she only gets the sun. We get the sun too. We also get the sun. Yeah. Okay, so the sun, what's the blue mean? Peace. That's why it's above the red because... That's peace and then the other one's war. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:35:11 Is it a peace and war? Why triangle stands for equality? Boost stripe stands for peace, truth and justice. And the red stripe represents patriotism and valor. Ah, you guys have a lot of valor, huh? Stolen valor. I've seen a lot of fake, fake military over there. Walking around.

Starting point is 00:35:24 Walking around. And unlike they're in the military and they're not The eight son makes a lot right? Oh, yeah, so it's a lot of valor Why do you know okay? You can come in I mean what what did you say yeah? Hi? Come in Are there any kids you know growing up named valor did you grow with anybody named valor? Yeah, what's the weirdest name because I know you guys have fucked up weird names. Yeah fun names Are there any kids you know growing up named Valor? Did you grow up with anybody named Valor? No. Yeah, what's the weirdest name? Because I know you guys have fucked up weird names.

Starting point is 00:35:48 Yeah. Fun names. What's the weirdest guy's name that you know? Agapito. Agapito. Agapito. What does that mean? I don't know the meaning, but Agapito.

Starting point is 00:35:59 So he was like, hi, I'm Agapito. Agapito. Agapito. Okay. Bung, bung, bung, I'm agapito. Agapito. Agapito. Okay. Bung, bung, bung, bung, comen. Bung, bung and spaghetti. Spaghetti is a common name there. Yeah, yeah. Look at their crazy dude.

Starting point is 00:36:13 You really tell me spaghetti is something that you know. It's loloi weird. Loloi. Loloi. You know I know loloi. I love loloi. Fort McKinley is not a name. Yes it is.

Starting point is 00:36:24 Somebody's name, Philippine. My dad is a. I need Fort McKinley is not a name. Yes, it is. Somebody's name. Phillip. My dad is a retired AFP person. That's a guy's name. Fort McKinley. Do you know number 10? What is that? Drug Hexics.

Starting point is 00:36:34 Yeah. That's a guy's name. My name is a combination of my father's name. Zoom in. My father's name. Drexie Carr and Zeus from Greek mythology. Look at the next one. Yeah. Sagacious, Junhurst, and Grau Wizard.

Starting point is 00:36:50 Grau Wizard. These are unpronounceable. I'd go wizards great. Look about Ying-Yi Hill. Look at this one right here. How do you even say that? Yeah, ying-ying-y. My name is pronounced Ying-Yi.

Starting point is 00:37:03 But it's spelled Y- and GGHYLL. It's pronounced holy fuck. Iinyun. My name is inspired by stenography according to my father. Yeah, right. Okay, number five. Sincerely yours. Wait a minute.

Starting point is 00:37:21 I mean, because you're welcome is common. You're welcome. Yeah, yeah. Or thank you. By the way, the you're welcome is common. You're welcome. Yeah, yeah. Or thank you. By the way, the sister's name is Spaghetti 88. Yeah. Yeah. My brother's name is macaroni 85.

Starting point is 00:37:34 Yeah, yeah. These people. The Sicilian yours macaroni spaghetti. Is that it? Go to two and one. No, no, dude. Drink water. Dude, and that's stealing from the natives.

Starting point is 00:37:44 Not only that though, It's a positive name Well, yeah, you should it reminds me hydrate. Yeah, when I meet them it reminds me see this one isn't as weird Go this with us. God is with us. It's God is with us. Yeah, God is with us. Yeah Sentences are names for them. I've never met any Filipinos. It's like go down. You've never been to 88 Go up God is with us. No, you don't know God is with us. Yeah for them. I've never met any Filipinos. It's like, go down. You've never met spaghetti 88. Go up. God is with us. No. You don't know what God is with us. Yeah. It's God is with us. It's God is God is with us with us. That's amazing. By the way, shout out wherever you are.

Starting point is 00:38:15 spaghetti 88. Go on. Go off girl. Yeah. Go off queen. Spaghetti 88. Cheats. Give me a name. Give me a name right now. I got one. What? Go. My name is son. If because if this these, cheese, from my toe. Give me a name, give me a name right now, I got one. What, go. My name is son, because if this, it's open in my mind. Yeah, it doesn't, yeah, you can be anything. My son, Jimmy crack cone, and I don't care.

Starting point is 00:38:34 Well, those two of them, Jimmy crack corn, and I don't care. All right, all right, all right. Jimmy crack corn, and I don't care. That's about those are my two kids. You give me one. I'm gonna name my kid. Yeah, wallet keys cell phone. So when I leave the house, I go,

Starting point is 00:38:52 I'm gonna fucker my wallet, my keys, and my cell phone, there they are, right here they are. There they are, that's a name. What are you gonna name your kids if they're Filipino? Anything you want really? Um, Pupu. Pupu.

Starting point is 00:39:04 Pupu. Yeah, Pupu. Pupu. Pupu. Yeah. Pupu, Pupu, Pupu. Ladoo. What's the third? Ladoo. Ah. No, it's Chinese. Pupu, Pupu, Pupu, and Kevin.

Starting point is 00:39:14 Kevin. Yeah. That'd be great. Yeah, just to throw off everybody. Pupu, Pupu, Pupu, Kevin. Spaghetti, 88. Maybe one of the greatest names I've ever heard of in time. Yeah, every, every.

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Starting point is 00:42:29 How'd you please do? Okay, so if the Philippines did you know that we also have our own KKK? I Wow, I did not know thank you Give me an napkin yeah, yeah, wait a minute hold on please give me an napkin before I'm a booger is coming out Dude, did you know hold on hold on you. Dude, I did not know. Say that again. I did, I did, I did not know.

Starting point is 00:43:11 Holy shit. Did you know that we also have. Your own KKK. Your own KKK in the Philippines. You have a KKK in the Philippines together. But the good KKK. What is that mean? What is it?

Starting point is 00:43:23 The good KKK? Yeah. Why? Wow. What is it? The good KKK? Yeah. Why? Why are they good? Okay, KKKK. Katta Asta Asang. Kagalangalangan. Katipunan.

Starting point is 00:43:31 Nang mga Anak mga bayan. No, and you're making this up as we go. There's no way, good. Katipunan. What's made? What's the Spanish colonizer? Oh, you pieces of shit. Also, it means.

Starting point is 00:43:44 Oh. Yeah, it's, yeah, yeah. Let's try to say that. Yeah on the count of three about one two three And look at that look at that founder says Andres on Andres Bonaficio So there is there's a phrase. There's a great there's Andreas is great great But what does wait? What does it mean? What does it represent? Do you know anything really about it? It's, it's just like an honorary organization that fought the Spanish and wanted like independence. It was a Filipino Revolutionary Society

Starting point is 00:44:15 founded by anti-Spanish colonists, Filipinos and Manila. Primary goal was the independence from Spain throughout a revolution. Wow, so you use the KKK to defeat his people. Under defense though, it's like, they couldn't have picked any other name. No, because actually this formed before the KKK. Yeah, there's no internet back then. So it's like, you know, they just probably didn't know.

Starting point is 00:44:33 No, we're too. Look at when this started. This is way before the KKK. I'm sure the Philippines have a prod boys too. I was confused. 1892. The KKK probably didn't start until what? What do you think? Way before that. Way before that. Right? Oh, wait before that. 1892. Right after slavery was abolished, probably. 1865. All right, so this KKK was first. I would have loved to go on that first meeting. What do you think?

Starting point is 00:44:54 In 1965, 1865, I would have loved, I would show up. By the way, if a non-white guy came up with white power, yeah, and they're like, it's too good, we have to use it. I don't know. We have to use good. We have to. I know. We have to use it. We have to use it.

Starting point is 00:45:07 You were sweeping up the floor and just left and you're, why power? That's me. That meeting must have been crazy, though. 1865. Oh, my, where was it in a barn? Polesky Tennessee. Holy shit.

Starting point is 00:45:19 Polesky Tennessee. And you know what? What? Uh, how, what a bummer it must be to be born anywhere near there today. Knowing the history of that place. Right. Right, you just born there. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:45:32 Where is it? It's it's south of Nashville. It's in the middle of nowhere. Wow. No shit. Do you think there's like a historical building that we could look at? On the way to Huntsville. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:45:42 I've been there by the way. I passed through this. I've told you this story. When you go down to play Huntsville, when you do the double, when you do Nashville's aines and you go down the driver told me that. He's like, you see that right over there? KKK started right down that road. Wow. And I was like, wow, wow, wow, wow. Maybe I should go back home is what I said. Maybe I should go back home. What is this? It's a Spanish journalist on TV while a Spanish man walks by and grabs her ass and it becomes all black.

Starting point is 00:46:07 See, this is very power for the course for Spanish. Yeah, you wanna see this? Let's see it. I have my sword and a man, I try to get a smacked around the butt. I'm not sure what we're doing. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Starting point is 00:46:23 It's a bad question, but you just touched the ass? The ass? Yes. Y esa, perdóname, que te interrumpa. ¿Qué es culpa? Perdóname, es que hay sonidos malos, pero te acaba de tocar el culo? Culo. Sí. Es que no puedo entender, me pones ese, senor, delante, por favor. Oh, lo ofrez. Que le... Este tío, toito.

Starting point is 00:46:35 Pome este tío, toito, por favor. ¿Por qué la cama? ¿Por qué la cama? Eh... Por mucho que quieras intentar preguntarnos de qué canal somos, de verdad, me tienes que tocar el culo. Estoy haciendo un directo y estoy trabajando. ¿Y qué? O el culo. ¿Qué es que hay? For a lot of people who want to ask us what we are, we really have this curriculum. I'm doing a direct job.

Starting point is 00:46:47 We're here. I'll call the police. I would really like you to leave me to work. I'm not here to work. Man, bad bunny is up to no good these days, huh? This guy, causing trouble, he looks exactly like that guy. Sorry, I didn't want to touch your butt. I respect you, but I didn't want to touch your butt.

Starting point is 00:47:09 No, you know, you touched your hair. That's even worse. Wow. That's worse than the fucking butt, dude. Can you imagine if a guy did this in American culture, they would destroy the entire existence. It's over. Yeah, and so whenever somebody's like, oh, we're so sexist here in this country, yeah, okay,

Starting point is 00:47:29 we need to work on some stuff. This kind of shit, you could never do this on a marathon. That guy would be ruined. He's ruined. That guy? No chance. He's gonna walk off just fine. Probably, probably, probably, probably nothing happened to him.

Starting point is 00:47:44 I mean, it's just a little smack. See? You see? He's gonna walk off just fine. He loses job probably probably didn't lose his job. Probably nothing happened to him. I mean, it's just a little smack. See? You see? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. That's how they think. That's how they think. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Starting point is 00:47:54 Watch this, let's give them a, let's give them a, let's give them a barometer. Let's test it. Are you allowed to kiss strangers, wherever you want, whenever you want? Just in the face. Just in the face. Just in the face. Okay? Just on the face.

Starting point is 00:48:05 Just on the face. Okay. Cause they kissy, they would go out just people to kiss. Do you have the culture where you kiss your dad on the lips? You know he does for sure. There's no doubt in my mind. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:16 No, no, we don't. You don't. Other cheeks? Yeah. Nobody you know kisses on the mouth? My dad kissed us on the mouth. I know, I didn't like it at all. Yeah, yeah. No, not really. There is I didn't like it at all. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:25 No, really. There is like the two kisses. Two kisses. Yeah, that's European. What about in the Philippines? Are they kissed on the mouth? No. Like your mom, would you kiss your mom on the mouth?

Starting point is 00:48:33 No. Your dad? No. No one in your family would kiss on the mouth. No. What about a cousin? That's our thing. Yeah, that's your thing.

Starting point is 00:48:41 Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you never kissed a cousin? No, let me ask you, is incest wrong in the Philippines? I can take this one. I mean, what is it looked upon? It's wrong, but I. But it's an island. Right.

Starting point is 00:48:55 There's only so many people you can pick from. Most of my uncle like, like, they're like, each other's cousins. Oh my God. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. But not blood, not blood. cousins. Oh my God. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. But not blood, not blood. Blood. Oh my God.

Starting point is 00:49:09 So tell me a story. Yeah. Yeah. No, like, no the murder. End of the murder, yeah. Okay, so his, great guy by the way, son,

Starting point is 00:49:19 except for the murdering. His sons were also weird that liked my mom's siblings and their cousins. And did they do anything? I don't. My mom said they did something. Like what? Like they they did. Okay. They dated and everybody was okay with it. No one says anything? That's not a weird family get together. I don't know. Cousin is here with cousin and cousins here. Where's the line?

Starting point is 00:49:52 Second cousin, is that okay? Blood is the line. Blood is the line. Blood is the line. If there's a blood line that runs through it. Okay, so if I like, like, let's for instance, right, you and our kids, your dad, single, that's you, your mom passed away. Yeah, okay, for instance, right? You and our kids, your dad, single, had to see you, your mom passed away.

Starting point is 00:50:07 Yeah, okay, sorry. My mom, right, single. Yeah. They got together, we're brothers. Yeah. Could we fuck? Yeah, no blood. Oh, I see.

Starting point is 00:50:16 There's no blood there. So in Woody Allen. That's, well, no, Woody Allen was a little bit weirder than that, okay? That's a little weirder. That's a little weirder than we used to make out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm tired of you defending Woody Allen all the time. You do it all the time. Like, because that's a little weirder that's a little weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weirder than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than weir than we weir than weir than weir than Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes, oh, they said they? Yeah, yeah. No, no, yeah, there's no blood.

Starting point is 00:50:45 If it's like you married someone's family through family, it's like, that's just someone you met through a fair. I don't think it's chill, but it's, no, there's no bloodline there. Right. But have you ever like thought that your cousin was pretty? No. Why'd you pause?

Starting point is 00:51:03 Because it's mean to say, because my cousin, that's like saying, are all your cousins ugly? Yeah, I have one. I have one cousin. I have one cousin. You were like excited to meet them. No.

Starting point is 00:51:14 That's not the same thing. I love it. Because they're like, I love them. I love them and I do think that my cousins are, they're not ugly people, but to say, do I think they're pretty is weird. Do you, never been attracted to them

Starting point is 00:51:28 is what you're trying to say? No, no. Because if you can't get into it, one of your cousins go, she's attractive, although. I can look at them and go, they're not attractive. I'd say, oh, he's good looking or she's good looking. They're good looking. Whenever.

Starting point is 00:51:43 No, no, yeah, yes, no, no, I have handsome and pretty look But you've never been like attracted and was like excited to like excited to see that Way in a crochet. No, no, no, projected being like, you have, right? That pretty. You have to say, it's like, you're trying to make it to that. That was such a. Oh, fucking clever. So clever? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:52:13 Oh my god. So this is your shit. That's your shit. So when were you attracted to your cousin? Yeah. When I was 15. Go on. And how old was your cousin?

Starting point is 00:52:21 18. Was that weird? I mean, like you're both in high school, that's the seems like that's when. I think it's natural. What? To be attracted to your cousin? I mean, I would,

Starting point is 00:52:34 Am I the white guy in this? No, I thought that was the other thing. No, bro, I've never done it, right? But to me, like just a girl, like your cousin's in a island. Your cousin Paul. I have attracted him. I have another cousin. Yeah your cousin's a lot. Your cousin Paul. No, I have a cousin. Okay, I have another cousin.

Starting point is 00:52:46 Yeah. That's very attractive. She's older than me. By growing up, I knew that she was attractive. Just, you know, it's, sure. But, what do we do? But there was never any, they know, that's like, not even. Like I'm sure Brad Pitt's cousins are like,

Starting point is 00:53:00 yeah, he's good looking. Yeah. But it doesn't mean they want to fuck their cousin. Right. But you think they would, would they? Yeah, it's Brad Pitt. Yeah, yeah, you would have to. I mean, at some point he's good looking. Yeah. But it doesn't mean they want to fuck their cousin. Right. But you think they would, would they? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You would have.

Starting point is 00:53:08 I mean, at some point it's Brad Pitt. Yeah. A rapper investigative reporter entitled, uh, the Philippines silent incest problem and the incest rate of the country is 33%. That's huge. One third of your country. The 33% that's huge.

Starting point is 00:53:23 A third of your country. Oh my god. That's an epidemic. Dude A third of your country. Oh my God. That's an epidemic. Dude, look what it says. This number is likely under reported as many cases of incest or not brought to the 10 to the 30s. This whole country is fucking their family. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:53:35 What? It's a small life. That's what I said. Yeah, yeah. Any person who's shot, that is crazy. Yeah. No, don't laugh it off. So your cousin was 18, you were 15.

Starting point is 00:53:46 Did you tell him you thought he was attractive? No, because then that would be just be so weird. Yeah, but then do it on a podcast for millions of people. I guess it makes it less weird. Did you wait? You never acted on it, though. No, but I was, I told my other cousin, my girl cousin, and she thought I was weird and she stopped.

Starting point is 00:54:02 Like she said, don't ever say that. I like her. She's smart. She knows yeah, yeah, yeah. She knows what she's talking about. But I was like, you still? No, not now. She hasn't seen him in a long time.

Starting point is 00:54:11 Yeah, yeah. But I was like, like hardcore crush. And who's that? Wow. Other than your one, who do you tell your mom? No, that was it. You just told one girl. And how did you get rid of this, this crush?

Starting point is 00:54:25 Well, because he lived like far away from another island. Too far for you to do something bad. Yeah, yeah. Jesus, you're a bad, you're bad. But let me ask you, if he lived on your street. 100%. I've never been to that finish. Oh, sorry.

Starting point is 00:54:39 Would you eat rice cakes with them? Yeah. Right. Well, I want to ask. You have a late night bat wing snack? Yeah. Yeah. That's interesting.

Starting point is 00:54:48 33%. It was so cute. What was this? USA between 1980 and 2022, around 15% of families in the United States reported to have an event of incest in the family. That's a lot, dude. 15%.

Starting point is 00:55:00 I mean, that's a 15%. 15%. It's a lot. Okay, let me tell you this, 85% of the country doesn't do that. Now does that seem better? No, because, 85% doesn't do it.

Starting point is 00:55:14 When you're at the grove, you're walking, right? How 10 people? Yeah. One of them has done it. That doesn't sound weird to you? No. When you see some of the people at the grove,

Starting point is 00:55:28 it actually adds up. Or okay. My point is, have you been out in public? A lot of weirdos out in public. The more people I go out and the more people I see them are, I'm like, wow, we use a lot of weirdos. Oh, why so? There's more weirdos than us.

Starting point is 00:55:41 I would assume there'd be way more crossing than 15%. Yeah. Your friends with Brody Jenner Yeah, how long have you guys been friends? I love his coffee He makes coffee. Yeah, let's see All right, so I just came out to make us both some coffee and we are out of milk But I did find one thing Now you're great things about breast milk. Here, it's very nutritious, here, it's very delicious.

Starting point is 00:56:10 He's putting his fiance's breast milk and his coffee. In her coffee too though. In her own? Probably, I mean, if he sent to it. Now, how do we feel about this? I'm okay with that. I would do it. And not surprised.

Starting point is 00:56:26 Like, I just ate your, your, your, your footchips an hour ago. He had a splash of unconventional creamer to him in his part. What is, is he getting canceled or those are what? No, why would he get canceled? There's nothing wrong about it. I mean, I don't, I think it's cool for the baby to drink for nutritional purposes. But unless that espresso shot cool for the baby to drink for nutritional purposes, but unless that espresso shot is for his baby,

Starting point is 00:56:48 would you drink your wife's breast milk and coffee? I've always wanted to try breast milk. You've never tried it? I do a shot of it. You've never tried it? There's a place on Melrose that sells tit milk. It's called tit milk. Yeah, what is it tasting?

Starting point is 00:57:01 Does it take like half a minute? I've never tasted it. Who would be sweet? You know that there's a store in the Philippines that sells breast milk. Yeah, what is it tasty? Does it take like, kind of taste it? Who would be sweet? You know that there's a store in the Philippines that sells breast milk. You've had it? Yeah, but my mom. But you don't remember it as a baby? Because when she gave birth to my youngest son.

Starting point is 00:57:16 Oh yeah, because she's much older than her brother. So you tried it or she gave it to you? I tried it. Shut up, did you drink a couple of cups of it? Or did she sleep and you took it? Okay, when she was, she was just resting and Rudy. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:57:30 When she was pumping milk, I just asked her, oh, can I try it? And she just, Hey, and you sucked it from the tit. No, I'm not. Say you sucked it from the tit. Do you suck it from the tit or? Say you sucked it from the tit. I suck it from the tit. Did you really? Yeah. Okay, you sucked it from the tip. Do you suck it from the tip or say you sucked it from the tip? I suck it from did you really? Yeah, okay, you sucked it and it tastes it sweet

Starting point is 00:57:52 But not were you 17 Who's this during your crush with your cousin? 12 I don't I don't think there's anything wrong with this if he him and his wife, but that's fine. It's just unusual. I would just drink my coffee black that day. Yeah, me too. I'm not gonna put my wife's breast milk. What? I have a confession. Here we go. Here we go. This is the stuff we love. Go ahead. I had some this summer. You had breast milk this summer. Hooms.

Starting point is 00:58:24 From a lady that came over to my house. So a pregnant woman or woman who had just given birth? She just gave birth. And she's milking. Yeah, she was milking and that was part of the appeal. I was like, oh, like an extra thing. Timeout, did you ask for, like, is this a service? You order a woman who, is this the thing you do?

Starting point is 00:58:41 No, it wasn't. This is a service. He orders women to just get birth to come over so you can suck on their breast milk. It was an escort and like an extra thing was like, Oh, that's a bonus add on. Oh, major, major. It's like a fetish.

Starting point is 00:58:54 In the escort category, there was a fetish of people who want to drink breast milk with their escort. It's like while you're doing things, she'll like squeeze them and like milk goes everywhere. How much more money is that than the regular? Like a hundred dollar add-on. It's like, oh, it's an easy way to make money if you just had a kid.

Starting point is 00:59:10 I just, it's an easy way to make money. You sound like a sad pimp. Yeah. You know, you know. Hey, baby, it's an easy way to make money if you just had a kid. Go ahead, go ahead. No, but I thought it would be a lot of-

Starting point is 00:59:21 Go ahead and honk that titty all over that dude. I thought it was really hot. So when Brody Jenner is like doing a coffee thing, I was like, oh, I would definitely do it. Explain to me, when you're hooking up with this person, you need help. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

Starting point is 00:59:36 no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. It was like yeah, oh, that sounds good though. That's good Sometimes you get parts in the middle of it. I know sweet is good. You know you run I all I Sauer then we'd have a problem. No, but maybe that I like sour stuff to like a sour patched kid love a good sour patch kid That'd be nice. We'll sour patched it. Yeah, so you hooked up with this person you did this she gave you some breast milk during hooking up and after And then you did it again. It was just your last time. Or is this?

Starting point is 01:00:09 I have seen her before last time she did it too, but let me ask you something. Have you eaten poop? Come. I've never eaten come. Why are you looking at me? Like I... Because we don't believe you. Really?

Starting point is 01:00:22 Yeah. I've never eaten come. That wasn't my own. That wasn't your own. I've tried my own never what did you try your own? I mean like in my lifetime when it wasn't like last month. I didn't want to know that it could have been the last year I think the past couple years Yeah, we got to get you to a facility. Yeah, with real doctors with a real doctor You can't go to one of those ones

Starting point is 01:00:45 on Sunset. Yeah. I didn't know that was bad to try to go on. It's not bad, but it's not cool. It's not good either. You know, it's like liking your second cousin. It's not bad, but it's not good either. Yeah. Like we said to her.

Starting point is 01:00:56 Yeah. The things were being honest. I appreciate it. Yeah. But I do think that that's a crazy thing that there's addons now. Sex is not good enough. You need to suck tit milk to like amp it up.

Starting point is 01:01:07 But it's also like a performance, like while you're having... It's like a show. You need more than just the sex and the companion giz. Oh yeah, at this point. Really. I need a whole production. See, this is what my fear is, Bob. We talked about this.

Starting point is 01:01:19 I'm afraid he's going to get to like choke stuff. Oh yeah, in excess. Yes, and then in excess. You have a charity. And it got blessed in excess. Oh wow. So I'm going to go to the choke stuff. Yeah, in excess. Yes, and then in excess. And it got blessed in excess. Oh, wow. So I'm going to go to the next level. Yeah, that's it.

Starting point is 01:01:30 Don't do that. Please don't do that. Because it'll be embarrassing for bad friends. Yes. Well, it'd be make for a good pod. It would be nice. Yeah. But I'll say this, I went to a store in New York

Starting point is 01:01:39 that was an a high-end sex store in Soho. Really high-end. Like super, super dope high, because when you walk in, you don't think it's a sex store, that's what's the cool thing about it. But the toys were crazy creative, and there was one of them where you can tie yourself up like a little machine where you can wrap ropes around yourself, around your head and your neck and your arms, like tie yourself up, because you don't, sometimes I think people need someone to tie them up.

Starting point is 01:02:04 And you can, you can still think people need someone to tie them up Hmm, and you can you can still Perform with toys and stuff like that. There's a harness for a toy. Wow. I kind of wanted to buy it for you I would never it was for grand I mean you know what I will use what it was Mike Pence, you know hang my you know They back to the January 6th, the, I gave you a team. No, one of those. You're a team.

Starting point is 01:02:28 No, Mike Pence won. Love it, how news. And news, yeah, I do, Mike, you can give me a Mike Pence news. Why, does he make them? No, but they did that, didn't they do that in January 6th? Yeah, Mike. You know, hang my pants, they had it. But they, he should have used that and branded it and then made,

Starting point is 01:02:42 that would have been great for Mark. And he uses, oh my god. would have been great for the market. And the producers. Oh my god. Those were a flown off the shelves. The MP news. In what of, dude? Get yourself an MP news. Yeah, look at that thing, dude.

Starting point is 01:02:52 That was soon. Trader. Yeah, wow. What is this? You sent me this. Oh, yeah. I love this. So this is this asshole.

Starting point is 01:03:00 Yeah, I'm not going to be a man. I'm not going to be a man. I'm not going to be a man. I'm not going to be a man. I'm not going to be a man. I'm not going to be a man. I'm not going to be a man. I'm not going to be a man. You can find this video just for ya. Oh, yeah. I love this. I love this. So this is this asshole on YouTube who like goes up to people and he fucks with them. You know, like pranks, all these guys that do pranks.

Starting point is 01:03:14 Yeah, yeah. So put the phone. I hate this fucking guy. What's the phone up to? The guy says stop. He says get away. Stop. He keeps doing it.

Starting point is 01:03:22 Now look what the guy does. Pulls out a gun. Shoot some. Pulls out a gun, shoot some. Hahaha. Pulls out a gun and shoot some. That was good. That was good. That was good. That was good. Thank you. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:03:32 Shoot the guy. And by the way, the kid lives. He does? Guy lives. They took this case to court. And if I'm not incorrect, the shooter won. He did not get charged, because it was an act of self-defense. The jury found that this guy was acting self-defense and I love it.

Starting point is 01:03:47 I love it too. Because leave that guy the fuck alone. I know, dude. Leave him alone. You see those wasn't home depot where a guy will come up with a fucking thing. Yeah. Yeah. And scare people.

Starting point is 01:03:56 You should be able to shoot that guy. Yeah, shoot that guy. Shoot that guy. Yeah, yeah. No, I'm not even kidding. And you know what's so fucking annoying that this, so the guy got off on the chart. That's the best thing I've ever seen. But the guy got off on the charts, the kid lived, he didn't kill him.

Starting point is 01:04:07 If he killed him, I think it would have been a different story. Why? Well, because it's murder. I mean, it's, it's, you know, it's murder. I know I get it now. I get it now. You know murder, right?

Starting point is 01:04:14 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But this idiot, this YouTube kid says, I'm not gonna stop doing it. Now he's like, oh no, I'm still gonna, I'm still gonna keep doing pranks. That's what he said, after court. There he is right there. And then why do they always look like big dumb fucking goons?

Starting point is 01:04:29 Look at this fucking big dumb. Two lives at home with his mom. By the way, the guy who shot the gun, Bravo, aim up. You know what I mean? No, no, no, all right, I'm just... I'm just stomach. This is a bad ad for Popeyes though. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:04:42 Love that gun from Popeyes. What was the bit though? Was a bit like he's playing him something. Something on the phone was an audio thing I couldn't you make out, but I think it was probably like, yeah, you know, like whatever it is. Yeah, yeah. But he shoot, he shot him and he got away with it. And I gotta tell you what totally cool with it. And what state is it? Well, Dullis is DC, right? I don't know. It looks like Washington. Yeah, DC.

Starting point is 01:05:07 Prepare something for you guys. We were so excited for 1 million, for the 1 million episodes that we decided to sing a song to you guys. Oh my god, they're gonna sing a song to us. Like Barber Shop quartet. Let's see. It's gotta be harmonized. Gilbert, it's such a good job with your Acapella, you know, 400 episodes. With your Acapella, a little bit of... We decided to do the same. Okay, good. I love it.

Starting point is 01:05:29 Okay. I pay my dues. Wait, stop. Time out. Time out. Time out. Stop, stop, stop, stop. We won an original song. Yeah, we won an original song. You are gonna sing We Are the Champions. Yeah, here's a deal.

Starting point is 01:05:47 You sing a song. It can't be a mockery of another song. Right. It's going to be an original song that we've never heard before. No, so start over. I don't care what you have lyric wise. Make it up. Make it up.

Starting point is 01:05:59 Make it up. All right. Andrew just paid me in Boston. We need to talk about that. We shouldn't pay him anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I got laid.

Starting point is 01:06:14 Why are you looking down like you're reading it? You're making it up. Yeah. Because I'm ch- Okay, okay. It's also still too much like Queen. No, no, no, no, I don't want that. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:06:24 Doing that. Doing a different harm. Doing a, no, I don't want that. Yeah, do a different harm different harmony did Come on Thank you Andrew. Thank you Bobby. Yeah, yeah, I learned my friends. No, we work together That part true. Thank you for the hotel rooms. Yeah, they are fun. Sometimes I bring girls back Thank you for the hotel rooms. They are fun. Sometimes I bring girls back. Thank you Rudy. Wow. For being here and always supporting me. Rudy likes dogs.

Starting point is 01:06:56 Bobby eats dogs. Bobby loves dogs. And you're kind of like this dog, I think. Yeah. I think you're harmonizing stuff. This is a bullshit song, good. I was gonna do Freddie Mercury. No, but then...

Starting point is 01:07:11 Carlos. I mean, Andrew's gonna sing a song right now, then. Easily. We're not, but we're not. Oh. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Good. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:07:20 All right, well, I need to fancy and be a cologne to help me out here. You, three. You, three, are shit. You, I need to fancy and we're going to help me out here. You three you three are shit You three you three are shit. You're bad at your jobs. You're bad at your job We can't the bear on you. You're the bottom of the barrel. No, I don't like you your chip worship What you say what you do what is it word chip Wait, I just want to hear what it is. We're chip your chip. We're chip. We're chip. We're chip what

Starting point is 01:07:52 Your chips. Yeah, what what what did you say? We are chip. Oh Cheap. Oh Cheap I thought you was like we're Doritos chef. Yeah, we're chips. We're chips. I'm sour cream and onion chip. Yeah cool ranch chip. I'm a cool ranch Doritos chip. Yeah. Macon is a fanny. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:08:14 Yeah. Actually no, Macon is a bugle. Remember bugles? Yeah. That guy's a fucking bugle. Actually if we're going to name them as chips, fancy would be what? Fancy would be just regular lays like the like the original lays, greasy little kind of they're underrated, they're good, but they're not that

Starting point is 01:08:32 good. Carlos is a cheap tortilla chip with bad salsa. With like, yeah, with like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, with the one you're, you know, I mean, and there it's watery, super watery. And then what's my column? The wood chip. Yeah, bag of wood chips. The bag of wood chips. You're a bag of wood chips, man. Well, thank you for the one million subscribers. Thank you for being a bag of songs.

Starting point is 01:08:57 I have a question. Oh, we got this is what we like. Yeah, yeah. Wait, there's this trend in TikTok where the girls ask the boys if they ever think about the Roman Empire. And all of the... Yeah, what is this thing? Yeah, I don't get it.

Starting point is 01:09:14 They say like three times a week, they think about it. How often do you think about the Roman Empire? We'll say it at the same time, because I know it's the same answer. Oh, one, two, three, zero. Zero. What? Every day. Every day. Oh, one, two, three, zero. Zero. What? Every day.

Starting point is 01:09:27 Every day. Oh, fuck. Of course I think about it every day. Every day. The Roman Empire, one of the most influential time periods in history. Yes, of course I think about the Roman Empire. Really? How could you not?

Starting point is 01:09:36 I don't think about the Roman Empire ever. I don't stop thinking about it. I'm thinking about it constantly. Yeah. There isn't one moment in my day that I don't think about the Roman Empire, in comparison to what I'm doing. I'm at Jersey Mikes't think about the Roman Empire in comparison to what I'm doing. I'm at Jersey Mike's, thinking about the Roman Empire. What about you guys?

Starting point is 01:09:51 Like three times a month. I only know one Roman Empire guy, Pontius Pilate. Yes! That's the main guy, right? What did he do? That's the Bono, what? It's the Bono of... It's the Bono of Romans.

Starting point is 01:10:02 He's like the YouTube of Romans, no? He clipped his hands. He's a, he's a, he's a Pontius the one that's did the stab of Romans, no? He clipped his hand. He's a, he's a, he's a Pontius the one that's did the stab. Yeah, in Jesus. Yeah, he's the fucking, he's the evil fuck bag. Yeah, he's a fucking fuck bag that guy. He's from a Bruce, so Italy. I don't ever think about the Roman Empire.

Starting point is 01:10:16 That's an insane question. I've never, I've never, I've never think about it. No, they're asking young men when, how often they think about it and men are like, I don't know, like once a month, I've never thought about what, I've never think about it. I don't, I don't know, like, once a month. I've never thought about what I've never think about it. I don't ever think about it. So, okay.

Starting point is 01:10:27 Because all the men on TikTok say they think about it like three times a week. Maybe some of these men do. I don't ever. Are they all white guys, be honest. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, white. Yeah. What else do you see? What else is trendy shit for your age group, we could?

Starting point is 01:10:40 Wait, I wanna show you something. It's my nostalgic Filipino song. And I want you to see the video. Oh, boy. Okay. We sing along, try long. Later. This is the cut.

Starting point is 01:11:03 Press pause. Yeah. So are these guys popular? They were really popular when I was like 13 years old. 1.7 million views. 14 years ago, that's before anything got that kind of number. Yeah. So like if you would've seen them in the streets,

Starting point is 01:11:19 you would've chased down the street. Like you chased them? Yeah. But that's what I would like always like listen to. Imagine if that was his recussion. Oh my God. The tag along rap that will rock your hair. But you know what they're saying? No, can you translate?

Starting point is 01:11:34 I know. Okay, what is it? It was kind of saying, I really do. New song, I picked up on somebody. It was saying something to the effect of like, there's plenty of fish in the sea, but it's like, if you catch the right, you read that.

Starting point is 01:11:46 What? You read that on the comments. Red what on the comments? What are you talking about? He knows, put diolong. No, he read that. When did I read it in the comments? He knows that diolong.

Starting point is 01:11:55 No. When did I read it in the comments? Okay. There's no way you read that on the show. What? Man, we just showed you. To go out of the fish on the sea, yeah. I got that too.

Starting point is 01:12:03 There's plenty of fish in the sea. Exactly. But it's or it's like easy if you're it's easy. It's easy to catch one if you're not if you're not like if you know if you're just hard to open. Yeah. Is that what it means? You know, it did it. Where did I read it? We have iTunes and focus on it. We listen to shit. I read that somewhere. Where? Where did I read it?

Starting point is 01:12:24 That's kind of true. But on the chorus, it says we're tired of girls playing us. So we're going. Yeah, exactly. Going to go to go down to the. So we're gonna go to the beach. Right. To see the fish.

Starting point is 01:12:44 To the gays. Yeah, to the the fish. To the gaze. Yeah, to the gaze. This song is about being gay. But where's the gaze? At the beach, bitch. Yeah, where do you think they live? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where are you?

Starting point is 01:12:52 Okay, guys, live with the beach, right? Yeah. Yeah, it's a gay anthem of the 90s. Wow, look at them. Oh, they are gay. So they're basically saying girls are shit. Guys are the best. And if you want to be happy in life, you got to be gay.

Starting point is 01:13:05 Yeah. If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, never make a wop, man, yo, wife. So they're personal, boy, no of you. Get a fucking dude to marry you. Are they still big in the Philippines? Like if like, are there, what? I don't know.

Starting point is 01:13:19 Haven't heard from them in a while. Oh, you're keeping contact with those guys? No. What do you mean you haven't heard from them? You haven't heard? Like, there's new songs. By the way, look at how corny even the parental advisory look at the top right, look at the-

Starting point is 01:13:31 Babala, sis. Babala, be careful, babala. Ha ha ha ha. Go get your babala. Okay, I have another question. What is it say, by the way, before you go, what does it say at the bottom? Daitang Lassan?

Starting point is 01:13:41 Daitang Lassan? That's a good name. Is Daitang Lassan? Yeah. What does that mean? I don't know. I'm not Tagalog. I'm Beseia.

Starting point is 01:13:48 It doesn't matter. It's close. I speak Ibanics and English. I know slang, right? That slang. If somebody said that shit is cap, dog, I know he's saying that you're... What's the other thing?

Starting point is 01:14:00 You're lying. Oh, and the other thing is, Tichandra, are you a football fan? What's the other thing? You're lying. Wait, let me look him up. Travis Kelsey. Yeah, did you know that Taylor Swift put Travis Kelsey on the map? Yeah, oh my god. I've heard this before, and let me tell you something. Okay, easy to, I know. I get it.

Starting point is 01:14:39 She does that to me too. She doesn't even know who Travis Kelsey is. She doesn't know I do. You don't know who that is. That's why what I'm saying is true. Okay, could I lift it? Did Taylor Swift win two Super Bowls? Did she win two Super Bowls?

Starting point is 01:14:51 Is she a world champion twice? Okay, but Taylor Swift can soul sell. That's true. I wanna say something right now, I'm fucking tired of this shit. Let me say something right now. What does pop music stand for? Popular music.

Starting point is 01:15:04 Popular music. Popular music is for dumb dumbs. Wait a minute, I like a lot of pop music stand for? Popular music. Popular music. Popular music is for dumb dumbs. Wait a minute, I like a lot of pop music. I know me too, some of it. Some of it, I like. But my point is that, you know, for instance, one of the greatest albums ever made is the Velvet Underground album with the banana on it, right? The only sold 500 copies of that when it first came out. But the reason why it's in the top 100 best albums ever made, is because it's influential, it's fucking good shit, right? But how does it,

Starting point is 01:15:27 popular doesn't mean that it's fucking great. And Taylor Swift is talented, but she's not the all be of all of it. Preach, preach, preach. We're not gonna subscribe her, it's worse than a popular. We're a million, God, man, I'm tired of this Taylor Swift shit, dude.

Starting point is 01:15:41 She's talented, I get it. She's very talented. Yeah, but she's not there in 20 years, no one's gonna give a fuck. She's like Tiffany. fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck.

Starting point is 01:15:49 I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck.

Starting point is 01:15:56 I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck.

Starting point is 01:16:02 I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. I'm gonna give a fuck. Well, obviously because it was predated the internet, she wasn't as big as Taylor Swift, right? Because the internet... But if Madonna came in right now, we'd be like, what's up Madonna? Well, we'd be like, hey, is everything okay? Cause she's been scaring me in the last couple of years. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:16:11 She has a British accent for some reason, and she's from Jersey. My point is, it thinks fate, it's a fad. No, but she's incredibly huge. Talented person. Very talented. It's a fad. And you know what?

Starting point is 01:16:21 She put Travis Kelsey on the map. Ha, ha, ha, ha. You know, I want to see that video. After the first round of the realize that she was, a lot of traffic. Although I'm sure it's just a fact, I just expected it to show a bit more tired. All the five friends look like it.

Starting point is 01:16:41 I enjoyed the whole process and I enjoyed being in the press pause. You enjoyed the whole process. And I enjoyed being in the room. Press pause. You enjoyed the whole process? Oh my God. Your face is in other parts of the country now. Yeah. What the fuck do you mean? A tooth is missing.

Starting point is 01:16:55 She's gashed up. You know what Mr. Potato Head, like your eyes and your fucking neck, your neck is in your eye. This is by the way, you know, I don't know if you know this. This is bare knuckle. Women's bare knuckle boxing. Not UFC. This is bare knuckle, raw bare knuckle boxing not UFC this bare knuckle

Starting point is 01:17:06 Raw knuckle the face. That's why it's so brutal because there's no padding at all look at her She's fine little baby rap. She's fine. Yeah, she enjoyed the process. Yeah, yeah, yeah I mean go back to the original photo the fairy first what what fight. I gotta see this fight by the you enjoyed the fucking fight I mean she's getting worked. It didn't go the way I wanted to. How long do you think I would last with that girl? In bed? No, in the ring.

Starting point is 01:17:35 Oh, in bed, I'd be like, probably a long time. Yeah, yeah, but in the ring, you think. Bare knock on. One punch, you're gone. I do punch. Give me two punches. No chance. Give me two punches.

Starting point is 01:17:43 Please give me two punches. If the first one didn't land, yeah. All right. I bet my bank account. Please give me two punches. If the first one didn't land, yeah. It was like a chip. You probably do around. I can get a whole round with her. Yeah, I get a whole round. Yeah, yeah. But you think you lose.

Starting point is 01:17:53 Most likely, yeah, because I don't want to look like that when it's over. I'd want to bail. But wouldn't be fun to watch. A dude fighting a whole thing. No, you, me specifically. Her? It'd be fun to watch.

Starting point is 01:18:03 Yeah, yeah. Just me fighting very normal. I be in your corner, right? I'd splash water in the air. That's not what they do in the corner. I know, but that's what I'm hoping. Do you think that's what they do in the corner? That's what I'm hoping. That's what I'm hoping.

Starting point is 01:18:12 The referee comes out like, sir, if your corner doesn't have splash water in the air, we're gonna disqualify you. Yeah, I would do all kinds of stuff. I would do the powder. Why? What is that gonna do for me? Don't they have powder?

Starting point is 01:18:22 Yeah, but that's for you. That's for keeping your, that's for you. I don't care, I would do it. I would do it in their eyes. Don't they do that gonna do for me? Don't they have powder? Yeah, but that's for you. That's for keeping your, that's for you. I don't care, I don't do it. I would do it in their eyes. Don't they do that in WWF? You know what you'd wanna do. You wanna rub the, rub the, the goop with the wound, rub my wounds, my goop over.

Starting point is 01:18:34 Oh yeah, yeah. Close up my mind. What would I put in there? You know what I would put, I would put the tiger, tiger balm? Tiger balm. In my eyes? He says, right in your eye, bums.

Starting point is 01:18:43 Oh, I don't want that. And bangay, I would do a mixture, my own mixture. And now, I would blow fuck, I would talk about, blow fuck a powder in your eyes, and splash you with water, dude. You'd be ready for the second round. Yeah, I'd lose immediately. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:18:55 They couldn't have called it. What would you do in my corner? Huh? What would you do in my corner? I wouldn't be there. I know you wouldn't. Yes, I would. I would. I'd turn around and you're gone. No, I go like this and go, Bobby, run, run, run. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:19:05 I would make you get them tired. God, that would be so fucking petrifying. To being in a bare knuckle fight. With her? Anybody? Period. Yeah. I don't want to be bare knuckle.

Starting point is 01:19:13 What I could do with her, Jules. I, she could put up a fight, dude. No, I'm weak. I hate you. She's weak. Okay, well thank you for being a bad friend. Yeah!

Bad Friends - One Million Subscribers & Happy Birthday Andrew

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