Bad Friends - Rudy Gets Dengue Fever Feat. Erik Griffin

Episode Date: June 14, 2021

New Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com   Thank you to our Sponsors: https://www.betterhelp.com/badfriend & http://upstart.com/badfriends & http://buyraycon.com/badfriends & http://keeps.com/badfriends YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Audio Subscribe: https://apple.co/31Jsvr2 0:27 Erik Griffin is Back  4:27 Bill and Melinda Gates' Mansion Live  9:07 Rudy's Prom Dress  16:09 Vinnie Hacker and the guys Rudy likes  24:07 Erik's Immune Boost IV and Rudy's Dengue Fever  27:54 Fancy B is terrible at Improv  31:34 Bobby's Text from Hungary  33:40 Andrew's Stand Up in New York  42:53 Erik hates Voice Texting   44:40 How TV Shows Get Made  50:31 Bo Burnham's Netflix Special  1:04:00 Andrew and Eric Play a Game  1:07:21 The Bottoms of Turtle Island Animated by a Fan More Erik Griffin  Riffin with Griffin: https://www.youtube.com/c/ErikGriffinPodcast Instagram: www.instagram.com/erikgriffin  Twitter: https://twitter.com/erikgriffin Tickets and More: http://www.erikgriffin.com More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbyleelive.com More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: George Kimmel & Bryce Hallock - 7EQUIS Podcast Producers: Andrés Rosende & Pete Forthun Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You two are bad friends! Who are these two idiots? White dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. You two are something. We're bad friends. Welcome back to Bad Friends, baby. Are we rolling?

We are rolling. We're rolling. Rudy Jules is here. Hello, everybody. I have a big fat liar. Andrew! Andrew! Yeah, Bob. You're the worst.

Let me start this off the way that he had it on the show here. Hell yeah. Welcome back to Bad Friends. You should have pulled your dick out. Here's the real bad friends. Welcome back to Good Friends. We're here with Rudy Jules. He's back in town.

Me and Eric Griff are back, baby. We're gonna be good friends before we have to be like some sort of bathroom utensil brothers. How about we be like the toenail clipper cousins? This brush, bros. Whatever. Rudy, where were you?

I was in Hawaii. I can't hear you. Is your mic not on? You went to Hawaii? No, her mic's not on. Hold on one second. What were you guys doing before I got here 100%. That's exactly correct. What's going on?

George was sitting there in the seat. By the way, George is back. George is sitting in the seat doing nothing. Go ahead and test it out. Now we can hear. It's like you get to the, you know, you board the plane and then they're like, oh, you know what? The wings. Thumbs up with the wings so we can't fly yet.

What were you doing? Bro, I just came back from New York and it's so funny because they were like, we have to clean and disinfect the plane. We clean and disinfect the plane before everybody gets on it, right? They say that every time. The plane parked. People got off.

Within seconds, they boarded that bitch. I was like, they didn't. Did you clean it? Did you? There's a dude like, they're going to get on. They're not cleaning anything. They're spraying some sort of like disinfected. I've seen it.

Yeah, I feel like we're like corn. You know what I mean? We're going to grow ears. Yeah, man. And they're really adamant about like the filtration system and don't worry. When you get on a plane, you're basically saying, look,

I may or may not get COVID, but I need to get where the fuck I'm going. Yes, that was the whole point. That's what this is about. Save this dog and pony show for someone else. There was a woman who complained about the middle seat not being open. I talked about this and I was like,

I'm going to get on with strangers. You're done. No rights. It's over. You can't complain about it. The middle seats, this was a month ago, too. The middle seats are not supposed to be blocked off. She was like, ma'am, that's as of the first. We're filling in all the seats now.

She was like, that wasn't on the ticket data. And she's like, ma'am, you can leave. You can get off. Or you can go to Atlanta. What do you want to do? This is the same feeling I have about it. You're getting on the plane with others. So you don't get to act like

this is your private jet. Bitch, this is Delta. And you got other people on the plane. I can't stand with people acting like, it's like, no, no, no, man. I even feel the same way about apartment living. When you're living in an apartment, you have a contract with these other people

who live here. There's going to be noise. People are going to be walking around. People are going to be coming and going. People that act like, oh, you're making too much noise. Hey, go buy six acres of land someplace, bitch. Get out. When you're living here, shut up.

Yeah, shut up. I couldn't agree more. It's like three o'clock in the afternoon or whatever it is. Excuse me, sir, the music is loud. Yeah, it's like you're living with other people. We're basically all living in the same house. That's when an apartment is. You can't complain. That's the problem.

Once you live with other people, you learn. And if you hate it that much, get out. Move far away. Check this out, too. You live in a city. You live in one of the most dense cities. What do you want me to do? Imagine Bill Gates and Belinda Gates. Rest in peace.

They live in a 300-acre mansion. They literally live in the same house and never see each other. And these motherfuckers still was like, I got to get away from you. She was in the other part of the estate. They're serving. And there's robots and shit.

You can be in your own area. They don't exist together. And she's in this mansion like this. I can't stand him. Imagine living like, you know, in a two-bedroom apartment in Rashida. She's putting out the woodwork. Do you know about this?

She's going in on him. Her lawyers are trying to find, and there's photos of him with Epstein. They're trying to clip him every angle, man. How much money of his money does she need? Well, here's the trick with her. She's given it all away. Have you seen this?

Search how much money Melinda Gates has given away. They both have given away money. I know, but this is her goal. I think she wants to take all of his shit just to give it away. That's revenge. Like the OJ people? Yes, bro. She want to be in front of the courthouse burning his money.

Look at that. Where is it? It's just Melinda Gates, though. She has a big philanthropic need to give away all of his money. And she said her half that she got from him, she's going to give away like 80% of it. She wants all of it gone. Check it out.

Oh, you're going to give away 80% of $50 billion? Like go fuck yourself, man. She acts like it's like, oh, I'm putting myself out, and I'm giving away. I'm only going to have like 3 billion left. Like fuck off, lady. Fuck off. I want to see them put it all into Bitcoin,

and then we'll see what happens. It has only like $10,000. And they go, I'm giving all my money away to charity. That means something. Yeah, that does. You're right. Well, what can you even do with all that money? You have to give it away. The foundation spent $5 billion in 2019 on programs

in the United States around the world, including management costs from $94 to $18. They've given away $36 billion. Yeah, that's not what I was looking for. But anyway, I do know she's trying to give away all of his money, which I think is a bad bitch move. She's like, fuck this, dude. I'm going to bury him. I'm going to give away all this money.

My thing is like this. What does she think the relationship was going to be like? First of all, he's a crazy nerd. So is she, right? Right, but he's got all this money. You think he was going to be regular husband? I got $50 billion. Give me $50 billion.

Me and Rachel are going to have a whole different ratio. I give you $50 billion. Rachel? Who's Rachel? No, I'd still be with her, but she would be like, you know, on the other side of the... And then she'd leave you and take your half. Yeah, I know.

Rudy, where did you come back from, Rudy? You went to Hawaii. Welcome back, Rudy. Hi. You look tan. Do you miss Bobby? No. No way.

I want to tell you about my Bobby called me the other day when I was in New York. Yeah, we went diving, snorkeling, and hiking. Yeah? Did you catch any fish? No, we didn't. You didn't spear any fish?

Wait, hold on. Yeah, in Las Vegas, but not in Hawaii. Oh, I thought you did that in Hawaii, too. Hold on a second. Can you tell me about, okay, all that boring shit you just said? Tell me the good stuff. Did you meet any dudes?

It's a strict rule that it's a no-dude pause. And if she did meet somebody, she knows she can't say it in front of me because Papa Santino doesn't put up with that. She's not dating, she'll choose 30. But I met 30. 35, you're right. Wait, what did you say? Did you meet somebody? I was in the post office today

to mail something. You see what you've done to her? I know. She went to Hawaii, a beautiful setting, couldn't meet a dude at the post office. She met a guy. No, but there was a guy and he was cute and then he asked me if I was Rudy.

Really? Yeah. What did you say? Yeah. Yeah, and? And then he said I was doing good in the podcast. Okay, and? And I said bye. She's genius. Cut to them in the back of the room.

No, she knows. She says yes, thank you, leave me alone. You should have made him pay for your shipping. What were you at the post office for? I was returning my dress from prom. Oh, do we have pictures of that? No. Come on.

I have pictures in my Instagram of my dress. Oh, you do? Who'd you go to prom with? Myself. Like a boss. How was prom? It was really fun. What did you do? What happened? Give me some prom stories. Oh, Rudy!

Woo! Look at me looking sharp, dude. Look at that. You in that dress. That's fancy. That's cool. It's like tie-dye. Was it a theme to prom? No, there was no theme. Really? Didn't we used to do themes? Yeah. I feel like that was a theme.

Well, your thing was always casino night at your high school. I'm sure it was like... And yours was in the 40s, so that was just real for you, old-ass bitch. Don't talk about me. When did you graduate high school again? No, be for real. When did you graduate high school? It's always a drunk thing.

Yeah. They're like, that's not the theme. I graduated in 1990. When were you born? 2001. Jesus Christ. You could have two families by the time she was born. I know. We live in different states.

Fly back and forth. You had a traveling salesman. Smoking on airplanes. Rudy, you look great. That's such a nice photo. And you took yourself, right? Yeah. Why? Did you not get asked? And I also didn't want to be with a guy. Okay. We have to go. We can't let this go.

Did you want to go with a girl instead? No. You just said it like that. Don't know me like that. I didn't want to be with a guy. That sounded very literal. It was about a guy. You just didn't want to go with somebody. Yeah, I just wanted to be with a guy. Wait, why? Why the guy that asked you?

Because it's going to be awkward. There's no eye candy you could have brought with you? Why is it going to be awkward? So, like, interact with a... What do you mean? Yes, you do. This is because of you people. This is not me. She lives in Bobby's house. She don't even know how to deal with him

because she thinks men are you and Bobby. Imagine her example of men is you and Bobby. We're her uncles. She knows how to deal with boys. That's why she had the post office like, Oh, hey! She was in Hawaii.

It couldn't find nothing in the post office. You want to find a dude, right, Rudy? See? She's independent, bro. She doesn't need that. Because you've scared her. Bringing no boys around the studio. I guess it worked. Yeah, but you know what, Rudy, I think that's cool that you went alone.

That's a smart move. Eric went alone, but that was not by choice. That was just because... Ain't nobody going to ask your ass. Okay, I'm going to bring up my own pictures. Okay, I want to see it. You got to see the darn piece I went with. Did you? Yeah.

Prime was fun. What did you do? What was your prime like? I don't even remember, dude. See, I barely remember that stuff. So, wait, you went to Hawaii, you had a bunch of fun with Kalayla and her sister, right? And then you came back, you went to prom, you killed at a prom. No Hawaii pictures, by the way.

No. Why? Well, you don't want to see the real things that happen. No, they don't want to show off how fancy she is because they were probably staying in the four seasons and all that stuff. You know what I mean with sweets and stuff? I know. Who did you hang out with at the prom? Do you have a group of friends? Yeah, I have. And then this girl was so high

that she was becoming annoying. What was she on? I don't know. She just smoked something. She smoked something and just was becoming... Annoying, yeah. Yeah, that is annoying. Their generation. I was in Best Buy yesterday, picking up like a card, a little card,

and these girls of the register were probably same age, like 19, 20, you know, whatever, and were losing their minds because a dude, I don't know, you may know, Charlie D'Amelio's boyfriend was there. Do you know who that is? Noah Beck. Noah Beck? Is that his name?

Wow. Yeah. She pulled that out of her. That's what I said. It was like the same age. Bro, they couldn't check me out because this guy was in the store. The store was shut down for this cat. People were losing their minds for this dude. I never heard of him in my entire life. I know who she is, the TikTok girl.

Is that him? I think. Wait, that's Dixie's boyfriend. I don't know about Charlie's boyfriend. See, look at that. I knew she would know. I just don't get it. What do you mean you don't get it? He's like a hunky hot young dude. What do you mean? Yeah, but there's probably like a thousand that look just like him.

I know, but he's probably, he's probably he has a famous on YouTube or some shit. They all got to have the same level of fame to date each other. I get that. That's the kid. That was him. That was him. Long hair. That was him. Yeah, the other one didn't look like him. That was him. What's his name? Chase Hudson.

I love when George. Chase Hudson. I know, just like the dorkiest. I love the dork. He's such a dork. I love him. Like those two guys, that would be a great sitcom. The Dracula and... Dork and dorkier. Dracula and pink dick.

Like if they were gay, that'd be a great like, you know, like... If? If? George, I want to take you out. I'm a... I like how you say, he's from Spain, but you think he's from Transylvania. He's got a little Transylvania in there.

Yes, he does. He's like, oh, you want to go? No, that is a good call, because when I mock him, I go, finance advice. It does kind of sound Transylvanian. Do you think Fancy B might be a vampire? I think so. Yeah? He does kind of exude some of the qualities.

He stays up all night. He's probably 700 years old and we don't realize it. Nah, I see some signs of his age for sure. If you were, let's say you really were a vampire, people would notice you. You couldn't be on Instagram, like to really survive, you got to be a dork, you know what I mean? You have to be...

You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, nobody really... Nobody really knows him, you know what I mean? Because no one's going to be like, oh my God, you look like somebody I met when I was a little kid. No, he's just going to be like, you know, introverted, like... It's true, an editor. He sits in a dark room. Don't you, Fancy?

You sit in a dark room editing all day and all night, don't you? That's my life. That's my life. And I don't really know, and I don't really know his wife isn't real, we've never seen her. You know that, right? Never. No one knows who she is. George, have you ever seen his wife? I think it was a plant though, you know,

she was way too attractive for him. Yeah, it was a beard, it was a pay. He hired her. Yeah. I have her in the basement. Oh, in the basement. I have her in the basement. I've made him across... I live in a basement.

I live in the basement, she lives with me. Click on the first photo of this guy. Look at this guy. Do you like him, Rudy? Is he good looking? He's not. Not at all. What about him do you not like? Because he seems like he's a cute guy. Am I wrong? He's a little androgynous too. He seems like he might be a chicken or a dude.

Yeah. What do you not like about this guy, Rudy? I've just seen him a lot in TikTok. Oh, you know... So you're annoyed by him? Yeah, that's what... I guess I'm attractive. Well, that's like... Well, I guess that makes sense though, because if you do...

Right, if you do see someone enough and they just piss you off, you're like, I can't stand this. Who do you find attractive? Of these guys, these young, famous guys. If this lose the guy, do you go... Who is on your tiger beat? I like Vinnie Hacker. Vinnie Hacker.

Not his real name for sure. If it is, wow. They look like the same guy. No! He's even more gay this one. I like gay. What do you like about this guy? Pull up a side-by-side of this guy and the other guy.

The same guy. That's the same guy. They are the same guy. No! If you said to me, is that the same guy? Yes, of course that's the same guy. They look exactly the same. Who does Vinnie Hacker date, Root?

No one. Well, it could be Rudy Jules. Reach out to him on the gram. Look at this guy's lips. How old is this guy? That's injections for sure. Is he getting his lips injected? It's weird nowadays that...

He's got some juicy lips. I've been like, what's that girl? Guys... How do guys have DSLs now? That's a big thing. Boys have DSLs. That's insane. Women lips.

I would just like to see him on a Tuesday, like at 4pm, just regular. Because this looks all... Scroll down, let's see if there's... This is all made up stuff. Is he ever normal? On the far left, that was him. Top left, that one.

That looks like it's in the day randomly, right? No, he's still posing. He's done up at all times. You understand, Rudy, this is all fake. No, this is real. I know I'm saying like... Don't ruin my fantasy. Scroll down. This is all fake, you're right though.

And he looks exactly like the other guy. But let her have Vinnie Hacker. She likes Vinnie Hacker. So you're into white guys like this? No brown for you, huh? I like browns. Wait, wait, wait. Who was that for? That's like, is your family watching and they just went like this?

Yeah. I like brown. I like brown, I do. I love brown. Yeah, but every guy you've mentioned on the show that you think is cute has been a white guy. Okay, this one. Manny from Good Girls. Manny from Good Girls. What's Good Girls?

Is that a Netflix show? Oh, I'm thinking of a different show. Good Girls is a great show. Oh, that's him. So you like Manny? Yeah, he's hot. Okay, he's hot. Yeah, no, he is attractive. I think you're right there. Travis Barker with that beanie on.

No, but what I'm saying is the brown guys she likes have to be like... Very light skinned. In Mexican cartel type of like bad boys. Right. But the white guy could just be like, hi, I'm white with big lips. Yeah, hi, I'm white with big lips. This is actually a great show. I like this show.

Good Girls? What's it about, Rude? Moms that are stealing stuff. Oh, I've seen the preview of this. Yeah. Somebody who's really famous that's in it. It's one famous lead, right? I don't think she's all that famous. Yeah, she is. I've seen the poster of it.

These are the people. Well, Christina Hendrick. I know Mae Whitman. She's a great actor. She's really dope. Oh, and Redda. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. But they're all great. It's a great show. Mae Whitman is very... She's dope. I think she's really talented.

I should watch it. I've seen the billboard. I've just never checked it out. Better Help! I've got this so much on this show. I know you've heard it if you're a fan of the show. We are both big proponents in mental health help. That's what we like. And Better Help! Is the way to get that done.

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to get started. Another information provided in your loan application. Oh, David Hornsby. You know who he is? Cricket from Oh my God, from Always Sunny. He's funny in this. He plays a really weird character in this. Funny dude. He's one of those guys that will go

the rest of his career working, doing funny shit, and then only at the very end you'll go man, that guy was incredible. You know what I mean? You know how so many people work? When they find him dead in a condo in a Sherman Elks. In his basement. I keep David Hornsby in my basement.

David Hornsby is actually my wife. Matthew Lillard's really good too. He's been a lot of good. I'm stuck on watching documentaries now because I've been sitting on so many planes downloading Netflix. I tried to watch that Hillbilly Elegy. Have you seen that? No. Have you seen that? Did you guys see that?

Nope. I can't do documentaries a lot. I love you is a movie. I tried to watch that and I went right back to documentaries. Ron Howard directed it. It's Amy Adams and Glenn Close. What I hate doing is I start watching a series on Netflix and then you finish this season two, let's say.

You're like, oh man, I actually like that. And then you look it up and it goes, this was canceled eight years ago. That happens every time. I just watched the Shinara Chronicles. What is it? It's just kind of like Elf, sci-fi fantasy show.

It's so bad. The acting and even the special effects are terrible, but it was addictive and I watched the whole thing and I looked it up and it was like, that's a no on season three because of bad ratings and terrible and I was like, oh man. We've lived that life together.

Who are you telling? I just got a couple of residual checks from Showtime. It's so funny. Are they still showing? I'm dying a bit. Yes, because I'm tired of people sending us messages saying every other day I'm getting a message about like, oh, this is a great show. When is it coming back? Or I can't believe they canceled it. Really? You can't believe they canceled it?

We should continue to lie and just be like, it is coming back. It's coming back. We're coming back. 2024, we'll be right back. Griff, address what's on your arm, by the way, because people... I got an IV. I got an immune boost IV. Drip drip drip. I got a drip drip. I like doing it and I got a vitamin D shot in my booty.

Really? Why do they got to go on your booty? That's what I always say. Is that preference? No, preference. They're like armor your booty. What's meaty? How big is the needle? Wait, I make the same joke with the nurse every time. You gotta take me to dinner first, girl. How funny

she's autistic. She puts it down. She's like, okay. You guys got to go to dinner. Fuck. Have you ever had an IV, Root? Yeah, when I had dengue. I'm sorry. When you had dengue fever? You had fucking dengue fever. I thought she was dating a black guy. I'm sorry.

I got that dengue. Is that what the young kids are calling me? You know how about that dengue? Oh, he got that dengue. You only like white guy. She's like, I like brown and dengue. Dark chocolate. When did you fucking get dengue

fever? In the Philippines. Is that common to get? Yeah. What's going on there? Is it just like the Wild Wild West there? Can you google dengue fever? I can't believe that's that common. People still get that? I know it's common in parts of the world, but I don't think you...

You lived in a developed part of the Philippines, right? No? A little. I'm so ignorant. It's just I caused by a mosquito bite, right? Or any kind of bug bite. Mosquito bite. But what does it make you do? It's very... Look, very rare. Very rare.

Oh, that's fewer than 20,000 cases in the US. Look internationally how rare it is though. Everything is rare here. Like, international numbers must be huge. Africa, I think, it's massive. It says dengue fever international flights. Holy shit. 100 to 400 million infections every year. Yeah.

I think Africa gets dengue fever constantly. Go back to the last page because I want to see more about dengue fever. With these all your symptoms, is this what you felt? Fever, headache, muscle joint, did you have like vomiting, diarrhea, all that stuff? Yeah, and I had like weird red dots all over my body.

Wow. How long did it last? Two weeks. It's like you had rona. You had dengue rona. And what, did you lose weight? Yeah. Dengue diet. I'm on the dengue diet. I lost 7 to 10 pounds. So let me get this straight.

How much did you lose? 400 million people a year. Is that what that said? Yeah, around the world. Get it. I know. So 400 million people around the world get that. Yeah. And we didn't shut down their world economy for it. Okay. We'll be right back with

Bright Bart News with Eric Griffin. How many people die of dengue? Say that. Well, you know the number one killer in the world is fat, diarrhea. More people die in Africa from diarrhea, from dehydration and diarrhea, from getting sick and they die.

Look at this though. How many people die of dengue every single year? Up to 400 million people get infected, 22,000 die. That's nothing. How many people die from diarrhea? You don't shut down the economy for 22,000. I mean, maybe. Maybe in L.A. they would. How many people die from diarrhea a year? Look at this.

You shut clubs. Staggering. 1.6 million people died from diarrhea go globally. Can you believe that? Wow. 800,000 died from suicide. What happened? Were you just on the toilet? You just fall out?

I just don't get it. Yeah, they die from slipping off the toilet, cracking their head on the fucking sink. That would make sense. You get real slippery on the toilet. Or you know how they die rushing to the toilet and they can't get their pants down and then they fall and they hit their head. That probably happens.

This is the most... You never shit your pants? No. Have you shit your pants? Dude, I'm over 40. You shit your pants when you're over 40. No. There's two people in here that are 40. Have you shit your pants, PD? Nope. Have you fancy? Let's define what is shit in your pants.

Okay, well what's the definition? You know what he just said? He just said, I have farted a few times. Maybe a little bit of shit has come out. One time I was drinking this man's blood, I farted. He said a little shit has come out on a fart every now and then. That's what I mean.

I don't mean like I'm just sitting around and just like you know what I mean? I'm like, oh my god. You two didn't boot it. Yeah. Wait a minute, fans, did that happen to you? Did you squeeze out a little shardskis? Yeah. I love to just Yeah. Where was it? When was it? Um

I was doing bad friends one day. You were here? Listen he is terrible at improv. Yeah. Sometimes he's good. Like literally the scenario just turned into something completely

Can I add a little bit to how bad he is at improv? I just started some improv classes last night. Here's his improv. Hello, George, who has a wife and a kid. It is raining outside. Did you really go to improv class? Fans? I did.

You did? Yeah. What the fuck? How come we haven't talked? What did you go to improv? How did you film that? Where was the camera crew for that? Where did you go to? Did you do online? I, no, no, no. It wasn't person. Where? It came on, this coach came to us. Oh

this sounds like some like that. That's how you end up. Did you hire a fucking improv coach? I did. And where did you find him though? Is he reputable? Cause this seems like a Craigslist. Exactly. It's where the best improvers are hanging out on Craigslist. Fancy, I'm proud of you for

Improving. That's great. Yeah. Good for you, fans. Fuck yes. We do have to record that. George, next time we do have to record that, please. Okay. Yeah, there's no doubt. Yeah, that is, that is goal. That's for this show. That's for this show. And then bring that improv teacher

on. No, you know I'm not doing that shit. Yeah, just zoom them in and they'll be like, tell us, and then have that guy do a improv class with you and Bobby. That would be hilarious. He'd have to pay us, man. He'd have to pay us the big bucks. Speaking of which, Bobo

called me when I was in Jersey. Where was that? Yeah, I was coming back from Jersey, which by the way, I did my last socially distanced show. They had me in the hard rock. In a, we sold out both shows. 7000 seat arena

where fucking Kevin Hart plays because they had to spread out all these chairs because it was booked before the fight. Oh, I did the show on Sunday on fucking Monday. They could have put it in the regular venue or whatever. But it had been booked during COVID. Well, how many people were in there? Each show was, I could actually

look each show. I'm going to look right now, but bro, I walked. How did it look? How did it feel? I mean, dude, they did the best job that they could, but it was, it was it was also spread out. Yeah, it was how I mean, it was like it was a bummer because I was like, this was so spread out. So the total numbers was, it was like 1200 people total. So 600

a show. Damn. I know. Trust me. It was bananas. It was so spread out. I was just in Florida, West Palm Beach. And yeah, it's fine. You wouldn't even know. No, I know. Well, I did the same thing. I was in Dallas. Same thing. They were shoulder to shoulder. But look, this had been booked before. That's what it was, but they were spread out, man.

Dude, honestly, though, it was echoey and like the gaps were huge. And you were like, this is so it was tough, but on the way back Bobo texted me and he said I think he said I'm on the verge. And then I said, what? And he said, call me. Hold on. So

I called him and he said, this is this is Bobby I'm on the verge. That's what I that's what he said. I said, what he said, call me. He said he's having an emotional breakdown because no one wants to hang out with him. Such a fucking baby and a liar. Bro, I'm FaceTiming him and he's

and he's literally. No one wants to hang out with him. That's what he says. No, I think it's no one wants to enable his bullshit behavior. He's around like other actors and stuff like that who are like, dude, I don't listen to your podcast. Jamie Lee Curtis. That's what it is. Here, let's see. Let's see. Let's see if we can get him

on FaceTime right now while he's in hungry. He's only got a little bit of time left. Oh, you gotta give me the mask. Oh, yeah, you should have had it. Although I don't know where it is now. He's not going to pick up, but he he called me and said no one wanted to hang out. Jamie Lee Curtis didn't want to hang out with him. Understandable. Get it. But they went out to dinner like

twice and then after that, he's like, I'd have nothing to talk about and I want to be in the same frame with these people and I want to be as cool as these people and Kate Blanchett is there, which is like. Wow. Can you believe that? Yeah. I can't. She's like whatever the case may be. He was all complaining because no one would hang out

with him because he was like, I'm alone all day long and all night. He's got one new friend on there. Has he talked to you about his friends out there? He said that he had one friend, but then that friend left. Yeah, the guy left. I don't know why he didn't just like set up a show down there or something. Yeah, but

because he's lazy. I mean, what has he been doing? Has he told you what he's been doing? Just in his room eating. Eating and playing playing. Playing video games. Yeah. Oh, he brought his Xbox or PlayStation for there for nine weeks. You think he wasn't going to bring something? What would he what literally what would he do? I don't know. I mean, he

and he didn't like the food. He complained about literally everything and then he complained that he's probably not going to get any billing and get cut out of the movie and at some point I hung up. Yeah, cut two is going to have the funniest scene in the movie. 100%. You know. 100%. So he's bitching and moaning and complaining. He's going to be the dictator all over again.

Yeah, he called all angry about it. But yeah, but on my way back, I was saying how I'm happy that everything is lifted. I went to New York and I was in the cellar. Have you ever done the cellar? Yeah. Are you past there? Yeah. Yeah, I just did. I when I did this movie with Ray Romano, he walked

I walked in with him and Estee was there. Yeah. Yeah. And it was kind of like, oh, you know, and then we got regular sets, right? Because like he bumped it, you know, sure. I went on with him and it's funny. So I tell him, I go, well, you're doing what? Oh, the movie. Oh, right, right, right.

So then I then he goes, let's do some what's come on Saturday too. And I say, Ray, why don't we tell her and get like on the lineup? Yeah. So we're not. And he goes, oh, you know what? You're right. He's so famous. Because to him, you know what I mean? So we did that, you know, they didn't put his name on the lineup.

They put you on though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then I did it and I think that after that, I think she was at that finally like, oh, okay, this guy's funny. Yeah. You know what I mean? I had no plans to. I had never done the cellar. It kind of was one of those things where it's like, that's New York's comedy store. Yeah. Those guys come here. It's a little weird. We go there. It's a little weird.

You know, it's like their home. You know what I mean? I didn't want to step on toes even though I knew a bunch of those guys. Right. Me too. But the Stefano came out and Chris was doing like six sets, you know, one at the cellar, one at FEPA, Pussycat, one at Village Underground and then he did that twice over. And then he said, do you want to go up? Estee would like to watch you. I said, dude, I've never played here and I don't know. You know what's weird is like, I didn't know if I cared.

If I was like, do I, I'm not here enough. Yeah, yeah. I respect the place. And even when you go, you probably do it in like a club. You probably do it in like Carol Lines or some little theater. Maybe because I usually don't play New York. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so hard to play. It really is. I usually say no. I usually go, I'll play like Jersey. I'll play, I'll play Philly, Boston. New York City is tough. It's a tough cell. Yeah. So anyway, blah, blah, blah. I said, all right, I get, I, what,

fine, I'll go, why not do a spot? And I knew people. Mateo Lane was there who I love. He murdered. He's so funny, man. Yeah. Carmen Lynch, like people that I recognized that I knew, Todd Berry. It was like, all right, I was comfortable, you know, Ricky Velezza. It was people I've known or seen before. And I went up and had a great set. And then she was like, anytime you want to, but it was cool to get passed at this age in our career. Cause that's what I felt. We don't do it any do that anymore. You don't showcase it.

You just go like, if you're not into the club, you just go, well, I'm not in it that club. I don't go there. And I just won't go there. But isn't it funny dude to do five minutes? I haven't done five minutes in, I don't know. I really can't, I genuinely like maybe seven, eight, nine years. I don't know. When was the last time you did five minutes? Oh, shit. I wouldn't even know how to do it. It was, it was genuinely hard. You just kind of do, you just kind of go, I gotta get off. Here's two jokes. Like that's how I felt. Like here's two jokes.

I saw, did you see, was Louis there? He had just been there in the early show. Yeah. Cause he's been going a lot. Yes. Yeah. I saw, I saw him perform. And I was like, all right. Yeah. I, you know, he's back in full swing. That, that club is back. They've got all the, the, um, they took the things down. Right. They just took them down. Yeah. The, the, what are those? The plexiglass or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I didn't even feel like it wasn't a lot of people in there when I did it. No, because it's packed. No, no, but I'm saying because it's so small. Yeah. But so I was like, damn,

I wonder how it is that they probably just got people like sardines in that place. But it's a nice vibe in there. Yeah. It's the same kind of feeling I got. Like it's the same kind of OR feel. It feels like the ROR. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Except it's more intimate, bro. I've done a couple of sets and they've been fine, but they just, it doesn't feel the same. Yeah. It also not to get negative, but it doesn't feel the same without Jeff Scott at the piano. It's just a weird thing. It just felt sad. It felt a little weird for me. I had forgotten when I first went. I forgot that he died. Yes. Griff.

That's what I was looking for him. Right. What I'm saying though is that it was like a punch in the face reminder. So I looked over there and I was like, oh, fuck, that's right. They have his name lit up there. Yeah. Yeah. So that was like, I don't know, I thought that it was like, it's a nice tribute that they're doing that. Yeah. I think we all, I mean, I think, I'm so excited what the 15th, everything is open up finally, right? Are you excited? What are you going to do first? Huh? What are you going to do first on the 15th when everything is open?

No mask, no restriction. She's going to go to the post office. She's still nervous. Look at her. Stay home. You're still going to stay home? Yeah. You're vaccinated. You're fine. Yeah, but I don't want to go anywhere. Oh my God. This is the youth. I know. This is the youth. This is what happens. What's a regular day for you then? Sleeping. For real. That's all she does. What time are you sleeping until every day? Like, was this like an annoyance to come here? No. Yes. Yes. No. She hates it here.

I love coming here. She hates it here. Well, Rudy, what else are you doing during the day? Now the school's about to be, this is summertime, right? No, I still have one more week. Okay. One more week, I'm saying, but you're done. Yeah. And then what are you going to do for the summer? Maybe go back to Hawaii or in the Philippines. See how fancy this one is. I know. Fancy as hell.

Go back to Hawaii. You know how many times I went to Hawaii when I was in high school? Zero. I didn't go to fucking Hawaii. I didn't get to go to vacation. We went to Florida. Yeah. To see your grandma. Yeah, once. Yeah. To go sit by the beach and burn. Terrible trip. Right. And by car, by the way, we used to have to drive to Florida. I was a little more fancy, actually, because I was the only child.

Yeah, but it was just you and your mom. Yeah, just me and my mom. So when I was seven years old, we went to a tour. We went to London, Paris, and Rome. What did your mom do for a living? I don't even remember those days. You don't know what she was doing? Yeah, well, she did so many different things. She went to school to become something different.

So in my later years, she was a safety specialist for the city. She worked for LA, the city? Yeah, like one of the colleges downtown. So she was like the safety specialist. It was a new profession. Companies were getting sued so often for workers' compensation that they came up with a profession to help companies stop, make sure there was fire extinguishers,

make sure they was like, oh, so she became a safety specialist. But she was like a transcriber when I was a kid. Really? Yeah. She did like a thousand different things. Yeah, transcribing was a big thing for her. Because if you think about now, so a doctor would be in this thing at surgery or whatever or talking, and then she would be a medical transcriber.

So then she would have to like, type whatever the doctor said. Wow. But now it's like, that kind of profession is gone. Like a photo mat. Right. It's all uploaded. You know what I mean? Like you could just like do voice, do voice, you know.

Right. The moment you say it, it's already logged in. Yeah. Raycon. Oh my god. You know what, man? You know, I've been using, before I discovered Raycons, just standard earbuds and stuff that was the music.

But once I discovered Raycon, I just threw all the other stuff away. Well, you don't need it anymore. And I got to tell you, if you're traveling, if you're starting to travel right now, because the world is opening back up and you want something to listen to, throw those Raycons in your ears and listen to the sound, man. I mean, you can get crisp, powerful beats

at half the price of other premium auto brands. Yeah, they look and feel better. They come in a range of colors, which I love, because I'm so tired of having just good old fashioned white for some reason. I like some flavor in my ear. Yeah. And Raycons are built to go wherever you go with quick and seamless Bluetooth pairing

and a compact charging case. Yeah. They also have 24 hour battery life and portability. You can take them literally everywhere. I like to run with them. Bob likes to have them when he's on an airplane. You take him on an airplane. My airplane.

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Then you get 50% off your entire Raycon order. And it's such a great deal. It is. You'll want to grab a pair and a spare. Close it out, Andrew. That's 15% off at buyraycon.com slash badfriends. Buyraycon.com slash badfriends. Keeps.

Hey, man. Andres. Andres. The fancy. This is for you, baby. Well, yeah. Andres, two out of three men will experience some form of hair loss by the age of 35.

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go to keepskeeps.com slash bad friends to receive your first month of treatment for free. That's keepskeeps.com slash bad friends to get your first month free. Keeps.com slash bad friends. Keeps.com slash bad friends. Well, like I saw that commercial the other day about the Motorola. I know you guys have probably seen this.

They're pushing this deaf guy is talking to his son for the first time because you can speak and it dictates what you're saying. So you can be on the phone right with someone who's deaf and you can be speaking like you're speaking to them and it will voice dictate everything that you say. That shit don't work good though. Bro, he was like, this is the first.

He's like, Dad, do you realize it's the first time we've talked or that we've talked over the phone and I'm such a dick. I'm just like, he still can't hear him. Yeah, yeah. You're not talking over the phone. No, but it's like you're reading over the phone. That voice texting shit, like it's always going to mess up.

So they're going to have account. I use it every day. Yeah, but it doesn't. You always say something. You know what you watch? Let me tell you something. Let me see if it works. Let me say something that you always say

in your voice texting. You have to say this at least once in the chain. Sorry about that. I'm voice texting. Right. Here, watch. Let's see if I can do this. Hey, Griff, I'm voice texting you right now

and I'm pretty sure that every single thing that's coming out of my mouth is going to be correctly put on this app. You're fucked up. I know. I know. I'm voice texting right now. I'm pretty sure that everything is coming out of my mouth. Hey, Griffin.

My cock is so big. Hey! Right now, and I'm pretty sure that every single thing. Yeah, because you didn't say anything. No, it's if you speak with... You said all this annunciating. That was so simple. So I speak with clarity.

Hello. How are you doing? This is Andrew texting you right now. When you start talking regular... I'll do it the way that I'm supposed to do it. I'll do it the way I'm supposed to do it. Just turn it on right now. No, no, no.

Stop it. Just do it like this right now. Just turn it on. Dang, dawg. That... Hey, man. It got in there. See?

Maybe it's like said to just the white people registered. White people registered. Yeah. It was made by Asians who only like whites. See, look. I'm going to send you what you just said. It says it was made by an agent who only like whites. That's because that phone is trying to stop Asian hate.

That's what that is. Speaking of agents, are you on a job hunt now? Yeah. Sorry. I haven't had an audition in three years. I'm dead serious. Yeah. Well, even the one audition I got, I got all my hopes up and then they didn't even...

I know. I told you I thought it was going to get picked up and I'm sorry that it didn't. But you know what? Can I tell you something? Let me... Can I just give you what a network television is like? Listen up, Rudy. This is for you.

This is for you. All right. So let's say, Rudy, let's say you have a lot of money and you want to build a house and you hire an architect and you... the architect draws out everything about the house and you go, I love this house. That's the house I want you to make. And in the making of the house, you start going like this. I think I want the kitchen on the other side.

You know what? Can you change the... you use a mahogany. I want you to use a different wood. And then you make all these changes and then you see your house and then you go like this. I don't like this. Yeah, bitch. You know why you don't like it? You know why you don't like it network?

Because you fucked it up. That's why you don't like it now. Because all your dumb ass changes. ABC. ABC. They fucking fucked it up. And then they want to wonder why they don't like it. You know why you don't like it?

Because you got involved. You should just write checks and let talented makers of entertainment do the thing you paid them for. It's so... it's unbelievable. I know. That's when they ruin things. You can say that. I'm not saying that. I'm not getting any work.

You can... that's you. I'm not getting any work either. That's the last time I'm working for them anyway. That's it now. Yeah, that's it. Then I saw the pilot, you know. And then like my section, like, you know, they cut it down so much. I was like, do you even like me?

Did you even really want me in this show? Was the pilot bad? It wasn't what I thought. I was so disappointed in what they did to the office part of the show that I was like, I wouldn't have picked this up either. That was my thought. Who was the star of the show? Shannon Woodward.

Jane Lynch. Jane Lynch is... She was great. The stuff... the show was touched... Shannon Woodward? Yeah. I don't know who that is. Am I stupid?

Look her up. She was on West... Raising Amy. Raising Hope. Not Raising Amy. Her name's Amy. Oh, yeah. I like her.

Yeah, she's great. Westworld, yeah. Westworld. And she was so good at the roles she was playing. Like, just, you know. And I feel bad because the creator of the show, this was like her life story, sort of. You know, it was based off her own story. She's been working on it for five years.

You finally get your show made. You get it going. And then they just go... See ya. Yeah. They do what Andres does in his fucking pants. That's so sad. That those things come and go so much.

I know. And never have given a chance. That's what I'm saying. Like, it's like, why don't you just let these people make the show they wanted to make? And then if you say, after you see it, you go, well, we don't like it. But they're so involved in every step of the way. And they wonder why they don't like it. Right.

That's my point. The way I think is everything should be shot three episodes. I think pilots, quote, unquote, should be three episodes. Because you can't really get to know something in the first episode. By the second and third, you really get a rhythm. You're spending so much money anyway. Why not? Let's do three.

To me, three is the golden number. What do you think, Fance? You're in the industry. I'm just, you can see how upset I am. I know. Well, you should be. I think the way they're doing it today with platforms is better. If they like something, they yes.

Right. Right. But that's true. But on network still doesn't apply. They don't do it that way. Right. They still do the pilot system, which is they pick up, you know, they shoot 10 pilots or five.

But they nitpick at every single stage. Well, who was the studio and who was the network? ABC Signature Studio and ABC Network. Oh, so that should have been a lot. Usually, it's really tough if it's like Fox Studios and NBC Network. And you're like, oh my God, this is, you have two competing brands. Yeah. That's the weirdest thing.

It's like Nike and Adidas have a contract with an athlete. I know. That's what it's like, which doesn't exist. But people think. Imagine they're both going to go. But people think that about TV. People think that. Right.

People think that like on ABC show is on ABC. You go like, no, that ABC show is on CBS. Right. You don't even know. Because there's probably like really only three studios in the entire world. Like they're, they're all subsidiaries of something else. Right. Network television is about selling refrigerators.

Yes. It is. It's not about entertainment. It's why the price is right. Literally was about buying shit. Yeah. It was literally like, how much is this thing we're actually promoting? That's what it was like.

They make a show and then the up front are all about showing these shows to the advertisers because the advertisers are like, okay, is that show funny enough where people are going to watch it so we can, you know, sell our products? Right. That's what it's all about. Right. So you have to understand like why they don't care about racial equality. Thank God.

They don't care about none of this stuff. All they care about is like, how many white homes that got a lot of money can we get these shows into? Correct. And this is why you see a lot of white TV. It's not like, it's not necessary. Like we need to stop always assuming that this is about race. It's about money.

As a person of color, when I'm looking at this shit and I'm like, I know black people don't know because when they do, it'll be like, it's a black show for black advertisers. That's why when you're watching a black show, the McDonald's commercial was always, what up y'all? They're always like that. They've been like that for 15 years. I know, but you don't see that. That ain't on Grey's Anatomy.

When you watch it, Grey's Anatomy. There's no McDonald's on Grey's Anatomy. No what I mean. It's Chick-fil-A. Like anytime, and they do that and what I'm saying is I actually understand the business of it. Well, just business. It's just business.

Yeah, but I'm also like, I think for me, no matter, I think we should be more diverse. I like the diversity that's coming and happening, but the thing I don't like is if the diverse stories are the same stories all the time. So you're like, make sure that this is a broad range of shit. You know what show was kind of wild and totally different was, have you seen Bo Burnham's new Netflix special? Everyone keeps talking about it and I want to watch it, but I don't think, I think it's one of these like alternative type, you know, what are you laughing at, George?

You hear George chuckling. What are you chuckling about, George? I want to check it out. Yeah, it is one of these alternative types of things. It's not that funny, but it's very interesting. Yeah. See, that's what I'm here. So that's, so then it's going to be labeled brilliant.

What does that even mean? I'm going to explain that. Well, I think there's no audience. I may destroy you was the show I was trying to think of. I couldn't think of her name. Do you know that show? No. Yeah.

You like it, don't you? See, this is my point is like. Watchmen was good. I like it when it's non-white bullshit anymore. I like when non-white creators are making super unique shit because I think even when they do submit stuff for the most part, it gets channeled into this like, I know, but can you make an Atlanta? You know what I mean?

Like they, you know, that's the, that's my biggest beef is they're pushing out the same shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So at least that show is good, isn't it? I may destroy you as wild. It comes across.

You should watch it. You'd like it. It comes across as if. It's fucking funky. Not to say this is true, but it comes across as if the white production side, they get to like live their dreams and like, let's make whatever we want to make and then we'll see if it works. Right.

And on the other side, it has to be like something they know. Well, it has to be something they're familiar with culturally because otherwise. Or some white guy has to take a chance on someone like Atlanta, Issa Rae, or yeah, they take a chance, they go, let's do this, and then you see this, you know, what I love about insecure is like, you feel like you're a fly on the wall to these black women's lives. Yeah. You know, and it's just like, you just go, oh, and then they're portraying them as like powerful, successful, but also sexual creatures that that's like human beings, you know, because

when I come from an era of the 80s and stuff, or like, if you saw a black woman, a movie or TV, she got to be sassy as hell. She got to be like, you know, ghetto, whatever it is, like, don't make me. Yeah. Yeah. They were portrayed as people that like, like having sex or like doing things. Or just being like a normal person. A normal person.

Yeah. They always, they always inflate these caricatures. Yeah. And so then when you watch insecure, you're just like, oh, shit, this is like, you know. Yeah. They're modern day women. Yeah. That's what I made destroy you.

I love that. That's why you'd like that show. No, but what were you saying? You were saying before that there was a show, you were just saying, what did you just say before that? What did he say? Cool. Hacks.

Oh, he's had a, oh no, we talking about Bo Burnham's thing. Oh yeah. Yeah. He told me about Bo's. I haven't seen it. But I, but this one of those things that like the, you know, the, the, what's that one like real woke artsy, like the, the verge or whatever. Sure.

One of those. One of those publications where it has to be like, oh, this is the most genius thing I've ever, you know, it's like, is that what they said? Yeah. That's that kind of thing you're getting. That's the kind of publicity it's getting. So I want to check it out. Look, I'm sure he's an artsy fartsy kid.

He's always been like that. Yeah. It's how he came famous. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think he's, I think he's crazy talented. Art is Dead is one of the best songs I've ever heard.

Do you ever see hear that song? No. Art is Dead is so good. Just pull up the lyrics. I met him. Art is Dead. I met him when I was doing my new faces in Montreal. When he was like 16.

Yeah. He was like 16, 17, staying like crazy shit on stage. But he's always been like, look at how powerful this is though. This next song is honestly about nothing at all, but it helps me sleep at night. Art is Dead. Art is Dead. Art is Dead. Entertainers like to seem complicated, but we're not complicated.

I can explain it pretty easily. Have you ever been to a birthday party for children and one of the children won't stop screaming because he's a little attention attractor. When he goes up to be a comic or actor, he'll be rewarded for never maturing, for never understanding or learning that every day can't be about him. There's other people, you selfish asshole. Is this about Bobby? But truly, all of this money you worked very hard for, I slept in late when you worked

at the drug store. My drug's attention, I'm an addict, but I get rewarded. I get paid to indulge in my habit. It's all an illusion. I'm wearing makeup. Makeup. Makeup. It's great, man.

It's great. I'm doing it. No justice, by the way. But what my point is, it's a deep, it's a deep, wonderful song about what it's like to be a comic. I think he has good internal struggle. I think that this special is portraying those things. That's great.

My only problem with these like alternative specials is, let's not call them that. I'm just saying, let's call it, let's make a new thing. Well, it's called a comedy special, right? Because even back in the day, when we call them one-man shows, one-woman shows, and you knew you weren't watching the comedy special, you were watching a different piece of art. So what I don't appreciate is that now they're doing these things and then shitting on the people that, the art form of going on stage and just doing stand-up, as if like, oh, this isn't enough.

Right. It's like, what are you talking about? Two totally separate things. They're two totally separate things. Right, I know. But I don't like that. The problem is now with like, the youth, like her age range, they weren't used to that. So like, all they're used to now is, categorically, a TikTok guy is a comedian.

Do you know what I'm saying? Like, it's because the lines are blurred. No, okay. I hear what you're saying. Yeah. But I disagree as that being the reason. What is it? No, they are used to it.

They just don't like it because it sucks. I'm going to straight up. Yeah. Like, listen to me. You go on Netflix and you look how many comedy specials they have on there. They suck. A good amount of them. A good amount of them, just, the ones that are good, they stand out.

You know? It's hard to make a, it's a hard thing to achieve. Yeah. And then even about the person not being funnier, whatever. It's just about, it's hard to capture what happens in a live show. It's impossible. So, and then they would just hand in out specials like candy. It didn't even matter.

Are you the most famous person in Guatemala? Well, you're getting that special. Are you the most famous person in fucking whatever, pick a country in Europe where we're going to give you a special? And they just were like inundating these young people with like all this stuff. Every network, Showtime, HBO, Netflix, Amazon, and they just were like, and so now, you know, if I was young, now you'd be like, why do they call it special? Because it's not anymore.

So I don't think it is anything to do with like, they're not used to it. They're just like, oh, that's that thing that they do that no one likes or watches. The problem is, comedy is so hard to capture. Yes it is. So, so inherently, specials are tough. Like they really just have to be a moment in time. That's why like Eddie shit was great because it was a moment in time. Yeah.

Right? He's also a phenomenal performer. It also goes to the comic themselves too. It was a moment in time. Shit was happening. It was like an amalgamation of like, he's just becoming mega famous. He's a great writer. He's a great performer.

He's just becoming globally famous. Like that was just timing was a perfect. Same with Chappelle. He's perfect for Dave. Yeah. But I don't even know if it has. That's how a great special is born. But it's like the timing is perfect.

But with him though, I mean, what's the timing of six specials? I just think that. No. I'm saying when they first crack, the first specials that you see, the reason that they crack is because, you know, like Sebastian didn't pop until his fourth special or whatever. But that's because the timing wasn't right for the early ones. He wasn't that he wasn't funny. He was funny.

But we're all funny. Everyone that's good enough is professional. You're funny. You can whip a room anywhere. The special, the idea of a special is why Bobby won't make one, which I agree with. Because it's so hard to capture what you really want to put down forever. And you have to have material, you know. I love giving you layups.

That was like. Boom. He broke the glass. No, but it is. Have you ever watched comedy specials? I've seen Joe Coy's. Joe Coy, right. That, of course.

Yeah. Who else would she say? And that's why Netflix does that. Right. Right. He looks like you. Yeah. Do you like this guy that looks like you?

How did you like Joe Coy's special? It was funny. I liked it. Yeah? Yeah. Have you ever seen anybody else's? John Mulaney's. Right.

You like John Mulaney. We talked about that. And you know, you know, he's not single anymore. Well, he looks like an older version of the guy she likes. So she's saying like, oh, my guy's going to end up looking like this. John Mulaney is like a tall, skinny puppet. Yeah. This guy looks like a young sex machine.

They all start like that. John Mulaney did not look like that at any point. They start like that and they turn into a fucking monster. Ventriloquist? Yeah. No, but no, he does not look like those young guys. No. No, but so you've seen Mulaney's and you've seen Joe Coy's.

That's it, huh? Trevor Noah. Oh, OK. What'd you think about that? I liked it. You did, huh? OK. How do you really feel, Andrew?

I didn't say anything. I just said you did. Andrew's about to call George. I take that out. Take that part out. No. I've only seen one thing he's ever done. What I'm saying is there's so many.

Yeah, there's too many. There's too many. Yeah, there is too many. And you know what? It's all going to stop now. Oh, wait. Listen. It's over now.

Netflix cornered the market. Yeah. They overpaid for comedy. So people will walk down the street and go, hey, do you have a special on Netflix? That's why they did that. So they own it now. It used to be HBO. Remember how HBO used to be the thing?

They were the biggest. We were like, I want to get an HBO special. That was the dream of every comic. Now it's like, I don't even know, I don't even know what the dream is anymore as a comic. I think the dream is just to continue. You know, Jay Leno. The dream is to go viral.

That's the dream. The dream is just to create a big fan base and have them go to see you live. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. The same thing. But I'm saying it's not about, that's good now because now you can try to continue to make your own shit. Oh, well, because now it's like, you know, we need it.

Okay. Before. I want people to see me live. That's all I really want. Come see me live and have fun with me. Before there was only, there was only certain outlets in entertainment, so you had to go that route. Right.

So that's why it seemed as if, well, you got to work this hard to get like a sitcom to get a special. But now, look, you could be a funny Christian comic who got a million followers and you make it $500,000 a year. More. Those kids are selling out arenas. I mean, I'm saying it's crazy. So there's a niche market for, there's that, even that guy, what's his name, Darren

Chris or whatever his name is, country mama or mama country or whatever the hell his name. The guy that got clowned at. Oh, and at just for laughs. At just for laughs. Southern mama. Is that it? Southern mama.

That's Darren Knight. Darren Knight. Well, go to the images. Images obviously. I don't want to see a video. I knew it was Darren. Yeah. He did just for laughs with us.

This guy's huge. Well, right. What did we do? He came to just for laughs. Look up his net worth. He's huge. He was on the comics to watch. Right.

Variety. Well, I mean, this is one of the many years that we were there, but like, I remember he did his gala, right? And he bombed and he went home because it didn't go well, right? Like he freaked out. No, this was like, he was on stage criticizing the other comics. Oh, he was? Yeah.

Oh, I just heard he bombed. And then they confronted him in the hallway. Like Chris Redd was like, like going in on him in the hallway. Because he was talking shit. He just, what he was saying, you know, the stuff, the stuff he was saying, like, you know, like net worth two million is wrong. Yeah. You know, these things, by the way, zoom in on that website real fast.

Punch in on that website. Just, oh, no, no, no. Just pinch and pull. Pinch. Pinch your fingers. Oh, Jesus, George. Go back. You know how you can just pull your fingers on it?

There you go. Look at, look at the website that we try to verify. Glubby gang official. Yeah. That's who we're going to take. You don't go there from life. But anyway, the guy makes so much money. I know it.

Because he's like on Facebook too. So what I'm saying though is like, and it's no knock on him, what I'm saying is like, he has his following. Yeah. No. Yeah. That's what you need to create. So like, so now it's, now we're in a situation where you don't need, like, sometimes I'm

on Instagram and I'm like, actually, I had lunch with this kid the other day. His name is Semi, man, I forget how to say his name. But anyway, he's like, he's rolling with these like, Nelk network, you know? Nelk boys. Yeah. I know who they are. Yeah. He rolls with them.

He got $60 million in merch last year. I know. Yeah. They got like, you know, and this kid's like, he's got two million followers. He's so huge on the internet, you know, he wants to be a comic. That's who I met with him. And I was like, we can't go to open mics, man. You know what I mean?

Like, go to like, you know. Or just tour. Who cares? But that's what I said to him too. I said, if you want to like. I didn't go do his own thing. You want to set it up, you know? But I was like, it just was, it just was, it's amazing, like, it's amazing how we're

now in a day and age where you could have your own fan base that no one has to know anything about. You know what I mean? Yeah, you can live in your own little. You live your own little. You have your own lane. It's nice. It's really amazing.

Well, it's nice. It's an amazing time. So are you touring by the way? I'm, I'm, I told them to like, and let's start getting some stuff going. You gotta get out. Yeah. I just went to West Palm Beach. I'm going to be, I'm in Austin this week, but I'm going for this movie.

Where are you doing to Austin? The movie that Bobby and I did together is called Hero Mode is coming out. So it's like, and I'm going to the premiere and do like, yeah, but I saw a review of the movie and it was not good. Is that it right there? Yeah. I saw this review of the movie and they said like, oh, there was this cringy line in the movie.

And I was like, oh, I think that's my line. What's the, what was the line? I forgot what it was, but I was like, I'm pretty sure that was my line. So it's like, I don't know. We'll see. Hero Mode. What are you doing in the movie? I'm a teacher.

What does he do? Bobby's the principal of the school. Oh, so an ally. Can you even imagine? What a terrible film. It's going to be bad if you both are in it together. Yeah. All right.

What is it? So we're doing a game in which both of you are playing the other person. Yeah. Okay. So you have to be like Eric and Eric has to be like you. Oh, no. Oh, shit. Here we go, everybody.

Here we go. All right. Let's do it. Okay, let's go. What do you think is your best and worst quality? My best quality is my loyalty. And my worst quality is probably my stand up. Oh, we go go that way.

Okay. All right, bro. I said loyalty up front. I like how you like, you turned it, you know, it was like, it starts sweet, is that how I'm going to go? It's a fucking comedy show. Okay. All right.

Go ahead. What kind of things will you be doing 10 years from now? Oh. And are you me? Yeah, I'm you now. Okay. Okay. All right.

And what we'd be doing in 10 years, you know, fighting off skin cancer because the sun really affects my. Yeah. We get it, bro. Let me, can I answer that one for Griff? I'll be here. I'll be, I'll be Eric. Ask me again.

I'm Eric. I'm Eric. You're going to adopt. We'll probably, it'll be like eight years old by then. She's 19. All right. What is it? Say the question.

So, Eric. Yeah. What kind of things will you be doing in 10 years? Oh, this. Old ass bitch. All right. Go ahead. It's terrible.

Rudy gets the answer. I'm going to be Rudy and then Rudy gets to be Eric. That'll be. I'll be Rudy. She should be Bobby. She's not here. Yeah, but, but it's got to be traded off of someone in this room. Yeah.

So, I'll be Rudy and then Rudy will be Eric. Yeah. So, ask me. I'm Rudy. Okay. Hey, Rudy. Yes. What is your perfect weekend?

Sleep. Ballot. More sleep. With the dogs. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Okay.

Go ahead, Rudy. Now you're Eric. She's got to be you. That's unfair. Look how you let himself off the hook. Now she's your Eric. Yeah. Rudy, you're Eric.

I'll be him on this question. Okay. What is the strangest dream you have ever had? Uh-oh. The strangest dream. Hey. Hey, what are you doing? The bottom's a turtle island.

Don't let him influence you. That's what he likes. He wants to see him. He's sexy. He's a body. He's Bobby. I'm with Bobby. And Santino.

I'm with Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. Bobby.

Bobby. Bobby. Bobby. And Santino in Ireland. Naked. And we're just doing things with each other. Yeah. Okay.

That is your little dream, isn't it? What sort of things? What sort of things will we have? See? You did do it. What sort of things? All right. Are we eating?

Are we at the buffet line? What are we doing? You know what? This was great. You did great. Rudy, I'm glad you're back. Eric, I'm glad you're black. Dish.

Fine. Thank you. Thank you, Eric. I want you to end the show looking in your single and say thank you for being a bad friend. You'll take us out. All right. Hey, thank you for being a bad friend. Perfect. Oh, he's like, let's create a horror movie right now. Okay. What are you afraid of?

What am I the most afraid of? Yeah, that's I think we should play on our fears, right? Yeah. First of all, what we you and I both if we were going to write a horror movie. Yeah. Figure out what our fears are, right? And then we'll just try to wrap a movie. Okay. Middle of nowhere stuff creeps me the fuck out like if like I'm always down middle of nowhere films I'm always like ooh it's so sketchy middle of nowhere like in the woods

but in the mountains in the mountains and what even more dangerous right where you can lose power it can be cold yeah right so mine has to do with the ocean. Okay, so I'm out and over the ocean we got there just being in the middle of the ocean so okay we're going to put it on a boat then no we'll do both no but listen middle of nowhere is the middle of the ocean to me okay one in the same right so how about the one where it's on an island but is that island's a wonderful what a great place to be haunted okay haunted island a haunted island right perfect perfect perfect then here's another thing that I'm afraid of being buried alive everyone everyone that's everyone's fear that's

everyone's fear what is it kids I've got it you and I wake up you and I okay it you okay starts on you right oh sand is in your mouth you climb out yeah you were buried alive right all right so what you're saying is that I'm a guy right you yeah how about this let me just create my character I'm a guy right yeah and I work at like a liquor store in New York correct okay in Harlem so yeah I'm can't I'm logging out I'm closing the store it's not a 24 hour place right so I'm locking everything up right and it just shows me like just walking with my backpack to my little squalor house I have a really I live in the basement somewhere in Chinatown you live in Chinatown anyway I just feels right for this

movie you're Chinese yeah I'll be Chinese I'll be black in the movie we're right we're right we're right we're right yeah you live in the basement of a Chinese right so I you know and then it just shows me like a little montage of me like cooking some ramen right putting some ramen right rat runs by right right I'm by another really rickety table yeah right sitting there I'm slurping on the ramen I'm watching some something on TV the news or something right rarity or TV right that does a cut scene where I'm just kind of reading a book on a mat that's why I sleep on the floor yeah I know so sad right and then I plug in my iPhone whatever I have a phone right Samsung Samsung all right Samsung I plug in

my Samsung Chinatown yeah doesn't matter what kind of TV I'm looking at or a tube TV no less like an old tube not a key home so I assume just by your thinking I'm wearing a kimono 100% what else would you be wearing at your house so just all right I don't know I have a sword a sword and your hair is in a bun must be and what's in it what's what's holding your hair up chop six that's correct all you racist all right come on come on let's get back to where we want to be all right so I'm so you're right for some reason for some reason I'm wearing a regular clothes you're wearing regular clothes at the store but when I get home there's got to be a montage where people will love it people love it I have Samsung

to Shiva to Shiva TV TV right right oh shit right so you're slipping you know right right lay on your mat I lay on my bamboo bamboo mat right yeah right and then I wake up right on an island you wake up you wake up is crawling out of saying crawling out of sand yes naked butt naked butt naked yeah right how about how about I still have the chopsticks in my hair oh yeah got it yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah for some reason I still have the bun perfect with the chopstick of my right come out right yes I'd be completely naked right and it's the brutal day of this it's the sun right bright right and all of a sudden you your character digs out right and you're wearing

like a green suit and where my penis is is a little pot of gold little tiny pot of gold right over you're wearing a leprechaun all right how about this look okay okay all of the bullshit aside right we both wake up on the island okay we're both but naked we wake up on the island wake up on the island and you and I are ready to fight because we don't know how this happened did you do this to me no of course that's not gonna we're both coming out of holes where I'm not gonna go but I did you did you put me in this hole bury me and then put a hole you put yourself in a hole and bury yourself yes yes yes no that's the logic so we jump out of the hole yeah we jump out of the hole we're freaked out we're

panicked of course we are we had no idea what's going on oh you always say something like who are you who are you you're right we that's the dialogue who are you who are you right um and we kind of calm down we try to calm down I go right so my name is um Yoshi am I Yoshi Yoshi Yoshi right I'm yeah um lucky lucky I'm not Yoshi I'm lucky yeah yeah do we have to have accents for this we should I'm Yoshi I'm lucky what we're doing yeah okay so in this island it's not a big island very small it's maybe what a half a mile around not even quarter mile around quarter mile around right but there is in the middle of the island is dense dense there's trees and one thick very thick but there is a path right right you and

I usually you go it's so hot out here we have to get we have to get covered yeah yeah you're almost in flames I'm done right and I go um all right so let's I found a trail we go in the trail in the middle of this island is a statue of her her eyes are black black right and there's red blood tears right there right right and obviously she has not there's like a little message underneath what does it say um I can't read it