Bad Friends - Rudy's Fantastic Fail

Starting point is 00:00:00 This episode of Bad Friends is presented and fueled by Huel, your go-to for complete nutrition. Try Huel with 15% off today using code BADFRIENDS at my.huel.com slash BADFRIENDS. Hey, scary times USA. We did a live. It was really great. So much fun. Yeah. You have to check it out, man. You have to check it out. A lot of people think it might be up on YouTube. It's not. It's only going to be at moment.co slash BADFRIENDS. The people think it might be up on YouTube. It's not, it's only gonna be at- Never on YouTube. Moment.co slash bad friends. Yeah. Link is in the description for 11 days.

Starting point is 00:00:28 That's all we got left. We have- 11 days. Hoodies and shirts and stuff that's only custom for that. This was one of the most fun live episodes, interactive with fans that we've done. We're gonna keep doing them. We love them, but in 11 days, gone forever. Gone forever.

Starting point is 00:00:39 So go to moment.co slash bad friends. Bad friends. Watch it. You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? A white dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. You two are something.

Starting point is 00:00:52 We're bad friends. Does a bee have a dick? Does it? Yes. Male bees, also known as drones, have a penis or penis. They got a penis. It gets ripped out. What?

Starting point is 00:01:06 What? His penis is doomed to be ripped out from his body along with his intestines when he goes looking for love. So the moment he has sex, penis gone. Wow. One and done. That's why they're very faithful. Yeah. During the mating flight, several male bees called drones will be selected

Starting point is 00:01:23 from thousands of others in their colony to Mount the Virgin Queen bee mid flight. So they all, oh, so she's a skank. So she takes it from all these bees. Yeah. They give it to her and then they die. Yeah, go, you don't have to raise your hand. What's up?

Starting point is 00:01:36 What's up? We're like professors at a college. Yes, young lady? Rudy, please. There's a video on TikTok about a girl that banged 101 men. Okay, that has nothing to do with bees. Queen Bee. Oh.

Starting point is 00:01:48 Is that her name, Queen Bee? It should be. Wait a minute, there's a woman who's banged 101 men what? What? In her lifetime? No, like once. In one sitting?

Starting point is 00:01:57 In one day. Yeah, I mean, those are called gangbangs, not gangbangs, what do they call them? Yeah, gangbang. Gangbang, yeah. No, that's more than a gangbang. 101 guys? One day.

Starting point is 00:02:08 That's a small column. You never get invited to those parties, do you? I did get invited, but I had to- Can I be 102? Imagine being 102. A woman films Aftermath of sleeping with 101 men in just 14 hours. Wow. You gotta be exhausted.

Starting point is 00:02:22 Yeah. You gotta be exhausted. Would you rather be 102 or one? How much would I have to pay you to sleep in that bed when it's done with 101 guys? I mean, honestly, for one night, would you sleep in that bed after 101? If I was in the thing, yeah. No, no, no.

Starting point is 00:02:37 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not gonna sleep there if I'm like, I wasn't like, they're like, you're not a part of it. How funny though. And then I'm like, yeah. That's a good fantasy football punishment. You lose in your fantasy league. You got to sleep in the bed of 101 dudes aftermath.

Starting point is 00:02:50 Zoom in a little bit. That is awful. Who littered that orgy? Yeah, clean up after you. Right? Yeah. I mean, you're just throwing paper towels and ketchup packets and like, what the fuck is going on here, dude?

Starting point is 00:03:02 You called, you- What? Yeah, you would. Oh yeah, I'm eating chicken and stuff? Yeah, I'm eating fried chicken. Well, you have to wait, you, yeah, you would. Oh yeah, I'd be eating chicken and stuff. Yeah, I'd be eating fried chicken. Well, you have to wait in line. She's pretty hot. What are you gonna do in line? Well, you'd be on your phone the whole time.

Starting point is 00:03:11 Yeah, I'd be like, TikToking, scrolling, fried chicken, right? Imagine if it's your turn to get up there and get a hanger and you're like, dude, I am so close to finishing this doku, I have to finish this. And then guess what else I'm eating? Blue chew. Yes, you are.

Starting point is 00:03:24 She's actually very hot. I'm blue chewing it. She's pretty hot. But you know what's so crazy about this is you just called me out a week ago about this, about being like a clean freak. You know me, I'd be waiting in line for the gang bang, cleaning up after everybody.

Starting point is 00:03:37 Oh, I know you've been picking it up. Please don't leave all this stuff. Especially if it's at your house? Oh, please. Oh my God. Oh my God. That's why we don't host gang bangs anymore. Wait, so she's an OnlyFans girl. Her name is Lily Phillips.

Starting point is 00:03:47 Yeah. And she's, so 101 guys in one day. Is she setting a, is this at least a record? No, there's no way. Yeah, I don't think that's a record. Yeah, yeah. I think somebody did that a thousand times. In 14 hours?

Starting point is 00:03:58 Oh, no, not in 14 hours, I don't know. That's so much. I mean- Because technically they don't have to come. So you could just have, what I would do is I'd lay there and go just one pump. So I can just get through everyone. That's okay. One pump.

Starting point is 00:04:12 And then you would have to use a condom, right? I would fucking hope so. What? 101 guys. I would hope you'd wrap it up. Yeah, but is there- The girl said she didn't need like an STD test to prove that they're clean.

Starting point is 00:04:27 What? They did not? Yeah. And did they wear a condom? You get first priority if you have like a proof, but you don't need it. They have a fast pass like Disneyland. Wow, front of the line.

Starting point is 00:04:37 So much about this. What? The way they fast pass and then also, you know they also have the fast pass, they have kids in wheelchairs that go next to it. Yeah. Those guys get to the front as well. Or do they have to wait in line? The way they fast pass and then also, you know, they also have the fast pass. They have kids in wheelchairs that go next to it. Those guys get to the front as well. Or do they have to wait in line?

Starting point is 00:04:48 Well, for military first. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're boarding military. Why does the military get to go for them? Well, military and what is it? People who need more time to board? Yeah, let them go first in the gang bang. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:04:59 And then we'll get to first class. And then the elderly. Oh, they gotta go first. Come on, grabs. Let's go. I can't wait to peel your pussy to pieces. Yeah. So wait a minute, dude, look, I just did the math because I'm stupid.

Starting point is 00:05:09 101 guys in 14 hours, seven guys an hour. Seven an hour. Wow. That's almost two guys every 15 minutes. So they are... Brrr, brrr. Yeah. It must have sounded like a construction zone next door.

Starting point is 00:05:22 Yeah. People would have been like, what's going on over there? Which I don't know. I mean, been like, what's going on over there? Which I don't know. I mean, I just, I don't know. I just wouldn't be able to get it up. I don't think. Look, if I got a terminal illness,

Starting point is 00:05:32 I'm going to tell my wife, I got to leave you and I got to go join this world's greatest gang bang. I gotta go. One time I was at an audition, okay. Now this is how the Hollywood stuff starts. Here we go. I was at an audition and I walk in and it was all, like it was Finesse Mitchell, Eric Griffith, like all my friends

Starting point is 00:05:46 And we were high-fiving, right? We were making each other laugh, right? And then all of a sudden I hear somebody go, okay Bobby, and I ate that audition so bad It was fucking bad. The same thing's gonna happen at that fucking gangbang. Oh, you're gonna fuck. I'm gonna fuck around Right, what's up, dude? You know what I mean? Great movie or whatever, right? You did a great job or whatever, right? And then as soon as my name's called, I'm gonna walk in there and it's gonna be completely dead.

Starting point is 00:06:13 Nothing's gonna work. I don't know, man. I would have to maybe- You get nervous. I would grab a breast. Got to. What? No.

Starting point is 00:06:22 I wonder what her rules- I would try to get it going, you know what I mean? So I would grab a breast and I would probably always go, are you okay? Right, is everything okay? You wouldn. What? No. I wonder what her rules- I would try to get it going, you know what I mean? So I would grab her breast, and I would probably also go, are you okay? Right, is everything okay? You wouldn't ask?

Starting point is 00:06:29 I'd be the first guy, I'd be the one guy who kisses her. That's so funny. And she's like, what are you doing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just wanna foreplay a little bit. A little foreplay. The world's biggest gangbang, by the way,

Starting point is 00:06:41 was a Hollywood studio, Annabelle Chong, one of ours. Look at that. Oh, Annabel Chong. 300 men, oh my. Oh my God, our Asian- Wait, wait, this is the best part. It said the participants were far fewer than advertised,

Starting point is 00:06:52 so she only got to get to 251. Let's be nice, that's still incredible. Wow. Can we see a picture of Annabel Chong, please? It was in 95. That's in 1995? And she's where, go scroll down a little bit, where's she from?

Starting point is 00:07:06 Grace, her born, University of Southern California, she went to USC. She's from Singapore. Wow. Hey. What does she look like now? Guess who's going to Singapore? Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:07:14 Bobby. Annabelle, if you're still working, Bob and I are coming with the Bad Friends crew. We'd love to meet you. What does she look like now? Annabelle Chung now. I mean. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:07:24 Oh, still pretty good. Oh, she's pretty. Yeah. Wow. She's known professionally as Annabel Chung as a Singaporean former pornographic actress who became famous after starring in a adult film that was performed with the world's biggest gangbang. So she's no longer working,

Starting point is 00:07:35 but she's running like a shop somewhere. She's probably just doing like a clothing store. Oh, she's 52, Bob. Chung's dong. Hey. Wow. Younger than you. The queen of gangbang is younger than you. That's how you know you're getting older. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:07:51 Rudy, what's been going on with you? I failed an exam. Oh, great. That's fantastic. What, that's bad? I'm clapping, that's good. No, I said, that's fantastic. You have to fail in order to learn how to win.

Starting point is 00:08:01 Learn how to win. That's right. What did you, which one? Wait, wait, wait. Let's guess. Well, ask me some of the questions that's on the exam. To learn how to win. That's right. What did you, which one? Wait, wait, wait. Let's guess. Well, ask me some of the questions that's on the exam. Maybe I can answer them. I don't even know.

Starting point is 00:08:09 That's why I failed. Wait, wait, you don't know what topic it was? What the subject matter was? It's like DNA transcript. Here we go. I'm the expert of DNA. Go ahead. Biology, you failed biology, right?

Starting point is 00:08:21 Microbiology. Microbiology. Like give me like just any question that they might have. Are you fucking kidding me? You don't even know one question on the exam? She said she failed. That's why I failed. How many questions are there? There were 50 questions.

Starting point is 00:08:34 You don't know one? No. Oh my God. But it's like about transcription, like DNA replication. Can you talk us about DNA replication? I can't. That's what I'm saying. Okay, here you go, Bob. What's the difference between bacteria and viruses?

Starting point is 00:08:50 Well, they're about amoebas. You know what I mean? One has an amoeba and one has- Fail. I'm not done. Well, you're done. You're failed. Can I finish?

Starting point is 00:08:59 Yeah, please. You know what? You're so rude. Thank you. You know what I realized about you, Tuesday, when we did the live show, dude? You're a little cocky. I'm cocky?

Starting point is 00:09:09 Yeah. And a little bit like confident and sure of yourself. People see that. That's what the audience said. Remember when they said that? People see. They people see it, right? That I'm confident?

Starting point is 00:09:18 Yeah, what do they say Tuesday night? Why are you bringing this up? Yeah. Starting a war. What do they say Tuesday night? They asked Andrew bringing this up? Yeah. Just starting a war. What do they say Tuesday night? They asked Andrew if he was better than- Are you arrogant or better? Or you think you're better than-

Starting point is 00:09:30 That's what I'm getting at. You know what I mean? And I want you to lower it. No, I don't think I'm better than anybody except for you. See, that's what I'm saying. It's just you. That's it. I treat her very well.

Starting point is 00:09:41 But I wonder why the audience read that. It's one woman. Okay. One woman said that. And also, by the way, I know why she said that. What? the audience read that. It's one woman. Okay. One woman said that. And also, by the way, I know why she said that. What? There's a bad, she's nagging. It's a bad nag.

Starting point is 00:09:50 Yeah. It's like a bad flirt. It's a shitty flirt. So I'm sitting in the audience watching Andrew perform and there was a pretty attractive woman next to me. And during one of your jokes, people are laughing and she turns to me and she goes, your friend's hot.

Starting point is 00:10:03 And you know what I did? I went, shh! It was just an instinctual like, Was this a girl that you were with or just a random girl? Some random girl, but I just wanted to like, if I could spit out poison,

Starting point is 00:10:15 Yeah, you would. You know what I mean? Blimey. I had to rattle, dude. I went out right in her neck. You know what I mean? Like a scorpion, right in the neck, dude.

Starting point is 00:10:23 You're very buff, Tito Ann. Oh, fuck off! I love you, rude. You're very buff, T2N. Oh, fuck off. I love you, Rude. You know what? Let me say this. Oh, here we go. I'll say this. I love our fans more than anything.

Starting point is 00:10:33 I thank them graciously. It means the world to me. People may think that I'm like shut down or cold, but if you know me, you know I'm not. I just have a demeanor that has so much trauma and damage that I just feel a little blank sometimes. So people don't know. I would love to say hi and smile at you,

Starting point is 00:10:57 but when I walk around town, maybe I look a little, ka-doo, and that's because I'm a broken, shattered dude. Yeah, backstage too, I like to observe other people that aren't familiar with, you know, comics and stuff. And they get a little nervous around you. Only because I'm so kind of stuck.

Starting point is 00:11:14 I know, but I see people going like. You know what I mean? It's like, what's going on? Well, because here's the deal. Little boy, are you lost? You are a bright, beautiful light. I come in there with joy, dude, and that's one of my things is that I'm pure joy. You are, and mine boy? You're life- Are you lost? You are a bright, beautiful light. You're such- I come in there with joy, dude,

Starting point is 00:11:26 and that's where my thing is, dude. I'm pure joy. You are, and mine is- You're positive energy. Mine is comedy from a very, kind of like a very, like planted space. Sure. And you're a more, you are a bright, shiny star.

Starting point is 00:11:37 Like Napoleon. You know what I am? Okay. I am a, you have to dig for me. I'm a gem, but you have to dig for me. Okay. You gotta get down in there. You, you know who you are?

Starting point is 00:11:48 Your bio, what is that, bioluminescence, you know that when the ocean glows at night, that's you. Thank you. Yeah, and it's a compliment. I'm just saying, I'm a gem as well. I just, I'm different. You have to dig for me a little bit. That's what makes us so wonderful.

Starting point is 00:12:00 I have another philosophical question for you though. What if we don't have a shovel? And that's the real question. Wow. Yeah, What if we don't have a shovel? And that's the real question. Wow. Yeah, what if we don't have a shovel? You have to use your hands. You have to get creative. No.

Starting point is 00:12:11 No? Yeah, why don't you open up your own hole? I'm not like you. Yeah, open up your own hole. I don't like opening up my hole. So we don't have to dig. I'm not like you. I don't want to open my hole to everybody like you.

Starting point is 00:12:20 Because some people don't have the time to dig, dude. Well, you know what happens to the people that open their hole all the time to everybody? They end up in fucking huge gang bangs. Oh, that's right. And then they're immortalized forever as the gang bang queen. So guess what?

Starting point is 00:12:30 Yeah. From now on, you, my friend, you're queen bee. My friend? You're the queen bee of this show. Yeah, friendo. You're the queen bee. Yeah, okay. I'm the dirty gem and you're the queen bee.

Starting point is 00:12:39 Okay, I'll be the queen bee, dude. That's fine, you are, because you get fucked by thousands of people and you get tired of it. I know you turn to me sometimes after you've opened your hole too much and you say to me, I don't want queen bee, dude. That's fine, you are, because you get fucked by thousands of people and you get tired of it. I know you turn to me sometimes after you've opened your hole too much and you say to me, I don't want to do it anymore.

Starting point is 00:12:49 And I say, give the people what they want, bitch. And you do. I love the way you reversed it. By the way, we had so many people at the live show that came and asked to see your butthole and or your penis. But what bothers me is these guys, it's always these brazen men, show me your butthole and or your penis. But what bothers me is these guys, it's always these brazen men,

Starting point is 00:13:06 show me your butthole and your penis. And then I say, will you show Bobby your butthole and your penis? That's a fair exchange. And they get so creeped out as if that's crazy to go, you asked for his butthole, show him your butthole. Fair is fair, am I wrong? I didn't like it, that guy got weird about it.

Starting point is 00:13:24 He was like, that's fucking weird. Like what? No, because I think you said that and let him suck it or something. You said something like that. I said, let him kiss it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I said, let him kiss it.

Starting point is 00:13:33 So I think that was the part that he was like, oh no, I don't know, man. I'll tell you. Well, dude, party with us or don't. I felt a little, I will say, I had a moment of true vulnerability that I played off for comedy when you kissed that guy in the front row.

Starting point is 00:13:50 That was fun. And then he said something else, you said something else about kissing him, and I said, no, now I get to kiss your wife or your girlfriend. Oh, that's right, that's right. Making a joke. Dude, dude, and she wanted to do it. She was into it.

Starting point is 00:14:00 She wanted to do it, why didn't you do it? I know, thank you. I don't wanna kiss this guy's wife. Yeah. But she was like, yes, and he was like, yeah, she can. I was like, no, no, no, no, that was into it. She wanted to do it. Why didn't you do it? I know, thank you. I don't want to kiss this guy's wife. Yeah. But she was like, yes. And he was like, yeah, she can. I was like, no, no, no, no. I don't, that was a joke.

Starting point is 00:14:09 I thought- Can I? And they said yes, and you didn't. No, she didn't. Oh, she said no? She went, no, no, no. Oh. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:14:16 And then so then I tried to kiss the guy again and he goes, no. No, he didn't want it more than once. Yeah, yeah, so I'm like, whoa. He's a true, yeah. Well, you have, look, I'm cool if we've got some cuck fans. Yeah. I'm down for cuckery.

Starting point is 00:14:24 It's what Rudy really wants to have happen in her relationship. You know back in the day when they used to have black and white. She wants a cuck king, don't you? Yeah. Black and white fountains, remember back in the day? You know what I mean?

Starting point is 00:14:34 If it was a white fountain, you couldn't drink out of it. What do you mean? Oh, you mean the separation? Back in the 60s. Yeah, segregation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look at that, I mean the colored one is better. No, it's not.

Starting point is 00:14:42 It's not, all right. No, the white one, you put your penis in the middle of it. Yeah, yeah. But imagine- That's disgusting. It's so disgusting. That's a part of our fucking history. The history, dude. They wouldn't share water with black people.

Starting point is 00:14:53 That's how fucking crazy- That's how stupid it is. That's crazy shit. Or when they couldn't even like sit at like a, at the restaurant, like a diner table or whatever. Right, they had their own section. They wouldn't even be able to go in. Certain ones, yeah, of course. Like some of the jazz documentaries.

Starting point is 00:15:07 We're not going back to the city. Please don't go back to the city. I have some historical context there. Okay, okay, okay. Some of these jazz bands would go into a town, play a hotel, but they couldn't stay there. No, right. So you know what?

Starting point is 00:15:22 Did I say this already? Did I say this already? Where, what, did I say this already? Where what would happen is, you know, Count Bassey or whatever would go with his band, right? They couldn't stay there, but their wives would go into the black neighborhood while they're on stage and ask the residents, the band's in town, can they stay?

Starting point is 00:15:40 So then they would coordinate like, yeah, yeah, little Slim, you know what I mean? And Jackie Ize can sleep here, you know what I mean? Yeah, and Franky the midget, and you know what I mean? Trombone Tony can sleep here, you know what I mean? And they would all, you know Trombone Tony. I love him. He's so good. He's got little toes.

Starting point is 00:15:55 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Little toes, Trombone Tony. Yeah, and Squeaky Peek, Squeaky Peek, and whatever. And then after the show, the wives would come back and go, we got you a place to stay. That's insane. Yeah, that was a reality. It would sell out.

Starting point is 00:16:09 Yeah, that's a green book. The whole movie was about that. Not being able to perform in certain places. Green Mile or Green Book? Green Mile was a totally different movie. Green Book. Green Book won an Academy Award with- Academy Mini?

Starting point is 00:16:22 Academy Mini Award. It wasn't a full-size one. What's his name? Why can't Viggo, I mean Viggo Morgenson and Mahershala Ali. Do you not, you never saw that movie? Oh my God. You're in your jazz era.

Starting point is 00:16:35 He toured the country and Viggo Morgenson was his driver of a black- Oh no, I don't see that. Oh, it's- Do you know it though? I don't know it. Really? You're a movie guy know it though? I don't know, it hurt me. Really? You're a movie guy.

Starting point is 00:16:47 It won an Academy Award. There's so many movies though, dude. No, no, this won an Academy Award. Oh really? You saw every Academy Award movie. I think I've seen every movie that's won an Academy Award. Ordinary People.

Starting point is 00:16:56 Yes, seen it. Name one, there's no Academy Award movie I've never seen. Kramer versus Kramer. Yeah, dude, I've seen Kramer versus fucking Kramer. What's it about? Kramer. Stang the N-word at the laugh out of you. What's Kramer? Yeah, dude. I've seen Kramer versus fucking Kramer. What's it about? Kramer. Saying the N word at the laugh out of it. No, no, no, what's it about?

Starting point is 00:17:08 What is Kramer versus Kramer about? It's a court case film. About what? About Kramer versus Kramer. But what is it? Kramer, dude. You never saw it? No, I never saw it.

Starting point is 00:17:18 It's a divorce. Yeah, no, I did. Was it about a divorce? Yeah. Dustin Hoffman was in it. I have seen it. Did Kramer versus Kramer get anything? I don't know, I was just making that up. No, but Oppenheimer, yes, everything, yes.

Starting point is 00:17:26 Koda, no, actually Koda's the first one I haven't seen on that list. I haven't seen Koda. Green Book, Parasite, Shape of Water, Moonlight, Birdman, Spotlight, Argo, I've seen all these, 12 Years a Slave, Hurt Locker, Argo. Oh, let me, King's Speech, I never saw it. I did see the, of course I never saw it.

Starting point is 00:17:39 No, that was good. Yeah. No Country, Departed, all these, I've seen all these. So I watched No Country for Old Men again. That scene in the gas station with that old man is probably the most, it's one of the- He gives me the creeps in a way that no one can do. Call it friendo.

Starting point is 00:17:54 Yeah, friendo, but it's also just that the performance of the man that was, you know what I mean? The guy was so good. If you really look at it- The actor, yeah. Yeah, I mean, he's a character actor. I don't know who he is, but like, it's just so good. And his response, have you seen this movie?

Starting point is 00:18:10 No. That character right there is insane. Go back real fast. I did, there's one more that I know you and I definitely have never seen is Chicago. We've never seen- Never saw Chicago. No, never seen the play or the fucker.

Starting point is 00:18:20 Yeah. English patient, fantastic. Forrest Gump, very good. Great move. So what's the repercussions of you failing your microbiology exam? Well, I have- Stupid. Three more exams to go,

Starting point is 00:18:32 and I have right now like a B minus. Oh, you're fine, dude. A B minus? Yeah. I graduated high school with a C minus. You can, yeah. That's good. That's not good.

Starting point is 00:18:44 Good? Even having a D is okay. I was last in my class. We know, and you're first in our hearts. Thank you. Well, so nothing you're learning you're gonna use in your fucking life anyway, so it's a good thing. I wouldn't say that, totally.

Starting point is 00:18:55 Are you a biologist? You're not gonna be a biologist? Well, I'm taking fish classes, and that's fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Marine biologist, perhaps. Maybe. Yeah, if you said you wanted to work in the water, you definitely need to know that stuff.

Starting point is 00:19:05 I think you should just do animals. Just be a vet or whatever. You would probably need to pass biology to be a vet. Oh, you do? 100%. Yeah, that's a big deal. You know what you need to know about amoebas? Hahahaha.

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Starting point is 00:23:11 To be a vet and vet. I mean, do you, I'm sorry, dumb, but- I'm dumb. Do you spend like doctor eight years in medical school? To be a vet? Yeah. I don't know if it's a full eight. I think it's six though.

Starting point is 00:23:22 I think it's six, which is a long fucking time. It's too long. Four year. Okay, so it's, oh eight. I think it's six though. I think it's six, which is a long fucking time. It's too long. Four year. Okay, so it's, oh, it is said eight years in total. Typically takes about eight. Wow. And then do you make a lot of money?

Starting point is 00:23:34 I think vets make good money. Really? Well, I can tell you how much my fucking- That's true. The scan costs when I went to the vet for the emergency vet. Yeah. Did I tell you this? When my dog was puking and shitting blood?

Starting point is 00:23:43 No. The average salary for a vet in California is 171. Wow, that's a pretty good thing. Pretty good. That's very good. Very good. Yeah, I took my dog to the vet and we don't have pet insurance

Starting point is 00:23:53 and it was an emergency because she was throwing up blood and shitting blood and I had the worst panic, man. I was so scared, so sad. Then we go there and they take all these x-rays and stuff and they're like, you know, this is not covered. And I said, we don't even have insurance. She goes, okay, I just want to let you know,

Starting point is 00:24:06 comes back with the bill and it's $1,500. Also on top of that, she goes, some of the staff is a big fan. Can we take pictures of you? Yeah. I was like, my dog just shed blood. At least a discount, no discount. No shit, no, no discount.

Starting point is 00:24:21 No picture discount. Nothing. I was happily taking pictures like my dog pooping blood and I'm taking photos. Wow. I did the right thing. But I was also like, that's a little weird to ask me to take photos. First thing in the morning when my dog is shitting blood

Starting point is 00:24:32 and I'm a little worried and you're like, can we get a picture for the studio, for the office? I was like, sure. Is the blood thing taken care of? She's still shitting fucking blood. Yeah. It was a little weird. You know what my thing is,

Starting point is 00:24:44 is whenever I'm in a fucking pet food store, I hate it when, there's always old white ladies, they come in and they go, what's the cheapest cat food you got? Dry. Right? And I'm always like, you know what I mean? I'm always like, that's your fucking family member.

Starting point is 00:25:00 Yeah, that's the love of your life. You know what I mean? Well, here's the deal. It's an economic thing for some people, right? So some people can't afford to level up, it's the love of your life. Well, here's the deal. It's an economic thing for some people, right? So some people can't afford to level up. It's hard. Yeah, but it's just like the cheapest. You don't walk in the cheapest.

Starting point is 00:25:12 Well, think about, let's genuinely, let's do this. Yeah. In the scope of America, most people have to buy the cheapest gas, the cheapest groceries. Am I being arrogant? A little bit. No, not arrogant, but you're being-

Starting point is 00:25:24 Am I being- I think you're forgetting. Out of Am I being arrogant? A little bit. No, not arrogant, but you're being- Am I being- I think you're forgetting. Out of touch with reality here? A little bit. Give my dog nice shit too. Like, I think it's- Yeah, but you live foolishly. You know, they're not-

Starting point is 00:25:33 The gap between cheapest and average isn't that much. I agree. You're talking about a dollar or two, right? I agree with you, I agree. But I'm saying most Americans have to buy the cheapest gas, the cheapest food, the cheapest everything to get through their lives. Yeah, but it's just like-

Starting point is 00:25:50 We're blessed that you don't have to. I don't know, dude, because even when I, in my early 20s, I had two cats, and I went to the pet food store and I got like, I had no money and I still went like, I'm not gonna get the cheapest one. I know, you're talking- Because I want them to, you know what I mean,

Starting point is 00:26:03 at least survive. I agree, but I think most people can't. I think that's the bum one. I know you're talking- Because I want them to, you know what I mean, at least survive. I agree, but I think most people don't, can't. I think that's the bummer. I think they care. I think some people don't care. I think most people with pets give a fuck about their pets. They love their pets. That's why there's like a,

Starting point is 00:26:15 what's that place called that's near my old house? Just dog, just for dogs, just food for dogs. That shit's so expensive. I walked in there one time and I was like, this is fucking rude. It was like a- I love it there. Two pound bag of food for like. Yeah. That shit's so expensive. I walked in there one time and I was like, this is fucking rude. It was like a- I love it there. Two pound bag of food for like 80 bucks.

Starting point is 00:26:29 I was like, what the fuck are you feeding? They're like, we hand cut up filet. Yeah, they do. That's crazy. But no, it's not crazy. That's crazy. And let me say something. What? That's what the Bobby pays for the dogs. You do that? Yeah. That's so much money.

Starting point is 00:26:41 Well, it's my dogs, dude. I know, dude, but that's like an, that's an inflation. If I go to fucking BLVD, right, or you know what I mean? Or Maestro's, right? I'm gonna get my dog. Dude, I got fucking Nobu for my cats. That's fucking insane. Right, and they didn't like it, so I'm like,

Starting point is 00:26:57 oh, I guess this isn't gonna be a thing. You got the fanciest sushi in LA for your cat? Yeah, I cut up the salmon too and all that stuff, like really thinly, I go, maybe that'll work. I put gravy on it, they don't like it. Crazy. No, it's not crazy. No, no, it's crazy.

Starting point is 00:27:09 It's funny, but it's insane. I guess it's, you know, here's, and I'm gonna cause a little controversy out here. I might as well put my foot down, okay? And maybe some people, and I was gonna say white people, but I'm not gonna say that. I don't wanna generalize, right? No, go ahead and do it.

Starting point is 00:27:24 Yeah, they view their animals as, you know, a lower family member. Not true. Yeah. Don't generalize whites because I don't do that and he doesn't do that. You know, but it's like- Don't do that to whites. Just people.

Starting point is 00:27:38 How about this then? You wanna take it there? That's why I brought it up, dude. Let's take it there. No, let's take it there. Let's take it there. Let, let's take it there. Let's take it there. Let's generalize. Oh, Asians?

Starting point is 00:27:48 Okay, are we gonna do cat, we eat them? Time out. Don't go eat them, we don't eat them. Really? I don't eat them. Then don't generalize all whites. Not in this America, maybe in some remote village in Taipei.

Starting point is 00:28:03 Well, you're talking about a global population here, buddy. Do Asians eat animals? Oh, I know you're gonna do this again with the fucking slave, the Korean slave thing. No, do Asians- That's what you're trying to do, get a moment. Rudy, do people still eat dogs in the Philippines? We've talked about this before.

Starting point is 00:28:18 In rural. Rural, thank you. And yet it happens. But we're still in that three year grace period where it's legal to eat. In South Korea, they still haven't passed it happens. But we're still in that three year grace period where it's legal to eat. In South Korea, they still haven't passed that bill. But we did pass it. Congratulations, fucking lady.

Starting point is 00:28:29 In 2024. 2024, in three fucking years. Hey buddy, I'll double down on you then. Give it to me. What about squirrels? Yeah, some whites eat squirrels. Yeah, and snakes and shit. How about this?

Starting point is 00:28:41 Then you get fucking- Have you even attempted to pass this fucking law did not eat squirrels? Those cute little critters from the tree. They're delicious. Our tree friends. They're delicious. You've never had one?

Starting point is 00:28:51 Would you eat a squirrel? I think I would. 100%, they're so good. Look at them right there. Ooh, is that a filet? Oh my God, look at them. It's all dark meat. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:29:02 So good, it's so good. Oh my God, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yeah, yeah. It's so good. Oh my God. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. Look at that. What I'm saying is, is that I don't know why you went from me, you know, spending a little bit more money for my cats to us eating dogs. You did it.

Starting point is 00:29:14 I don't know how it went from one there to there. Look, you can't generalize and say all whites. I took it back already. Thank you. I'll take mine back too then. Yeah. But Asians still eat dogs. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:29:24 And you guys eat squirrels. Yeah, thank you. Okay. But I know there then. Yeah. But Asians still eat dogs. Yeah. And you guys eat squirrels. Yeah. Thank you. Okay. But I know there's no people that have pets as squirrels. Oh, there are. Who has a squirrel? Go to Dodo. Go to Dodo?

Starting point is 00:29:33 Yeah. Where's that? YouTube. And he has a squirrel. The Dodo. There's a lot of squirrel friends that the people have. In their home. In their home.

Starting point is 00:29:42 No, they keep them outside and they feed them every day. No, they don't. In the home, then. There we go. That's a guy No, they keep them outside and they feed them every day. No, they don't, in the home then. There we go. That's a guy chilling on a kitchen table then. Look at that guy. Look at that dude. Look how fatty he is too.

Starting point is 00:29:53 That looks like lunch to me. I know, what? Do they feed them like fancy nuts? They might. Yeah, but- Like Arowan nuts? Yeah, but there's a difference between like, you know, airplane nuts, right?

Starting point is 00:30:04 And going to like, you know, going to, right? And going to like, you know, going to Airwan or something and getting like organic nuts unsalted, you know what I mean? Right? I guess. That's what I would do. I would assume that golfers come from the same farm and some of them are just packaged for Airwan. Okay, okay. I don't know how they're packaged.

Starting point is 00:30:19 I don't know what the farm- Well, you know what? That's it. Then we need to do bad friends visits a farm. We need to go visit a farm so we can find out- But my point though being is, boom, there's another one chilling watching fucking, you know, reality TV on a couch, probably, you know, 90 Day Fiance.

Starting point is 00:30:32 Look at the fucking, look at them chilling. He's watching Love is Blind. Yeah, Love is Blind, chilling there. He's so fat. I know. They're so cute. They are so cute. I know.

Starting point is 00:30:41 No, look, okay, let's get back to the original thing. Let's go back to, yeah. I value my pet. The first person I kiss in my home when I walk in the door. I know you do because I know that you spent $1,500, but there's a lot of people that were like, how much is it gonna cost? Well, some people can't afford it.

Starting point is 00:30:56 I'm lucky that I could afford it. I'm lucky, I'm lucky. I'm lucky that I'm able to do that. Carlos's dog goes to the vet and it costs him two grand or something like that. He's in some shit. He's calling us. Would you pay it?

Starting point is 00:31:08 Yeah, of course. He would. There we go. But he's scared. Yeah, that's, yeah. I'm not saying the feeling behind it. Yeah, it's gonna be a hit and it's gonna be a bummer, but I'm just saying it's like-

Starting point is 00:31:17 But you're right. Well, it depends on what the, like, okay, here's one, all right? When you guys, when you guys- The grapes? Yeah, the grapes. I got a call like, oh yeah, all the dogs are in the, all right? When you guys, when you guys. The grapes? Yeah, the grapes. I got a call like, oh yeah, all the dogs are in the vet, right, and you gotta help with the money, right?

Starting point is 00:31:32 Cause they all ate grapes? Yeah, so I go, they ate fucking grapes? Like Roman emperors? What the fuck are you talking about? Right? And then nothing happened, but you guys, we had to spend thousands of dollars for what? Yeah, exactly.

Starting point is 00:31:47 So what was that all about? The vet said that they were gonna die. But why, are you freaking, the fucking dogs and the fucking vet, it's the first place. They called first and they said, yeah, take them to the- You did eat one grape! No, it was three. Yeah, yeah, I know.

Starting point is 00:32:02 Amongst four dogs, they ate three grapes and I get this call that's gonna cost all this money, I was like, what the Yeah, yeah. I know. Among four dogs, they ate three grapes. And I get this call, like it's gonna cost all this money. I was like, what the fuck is going on here? So in that case, yes. I'd be like, ah, grapes, we'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. Yeah, yeah. Wait a minute.

Starting point is 00:32:14 A bar of chocolate, I would be like, oh, let's just take it hour by hour. Can dogs not eat grapes? I do not know. I don't think it was grapes. What was it? Grapes. The number of grapes can be lethal to a dog, depends on the dog's weight.

Starting point is 00:32:23 But the general rule of thumb is that one grape per 10 pounds of body weight is potentially dangerous. Why? Grapes and raisins cause acute kidney failure in dogs. What? I mean, my dog doesn't eat grapes. Now you know. That's crazy.

Starting point is 00:32:35 I don't know. Now you know. I'm glad I know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also why do you have fucking just free grapes laying around on the ground? Because we were taking care of a crow. So we were feeding him grapes. Oh, that's right, the ground. Because we were taking care of a crow. So we were feeding him grapes.

Starting point is 00:32:45 Oh, that's right, the crow. Of course. Oh, do you know what they did for me? I hope they got you a crow. No, oh my God, I feel so bad about this. I haven't talked about this, about the little bird. I'm in the backyard with Gunnar. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:32:59 Okay. Oh, I know. No, you don't. And I look and there's a bird, a baby bird had fallen from the tree, right? And I look at Gunnar and Gunnar's just, you know what I mean? And I'm like, he's not gonna.

Starting point is 00:33:17 And he goes up and just breaks his neck with his fucking jaw, right? And then I fucking grab Gunnar, bring him in the house. And now the fucking, you know what I mean? It's like the little birds going, tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic tic No, you go, right? Please. His head is off. I know, it was just like, and they came over, it died, right? It died three days after. Three days is pretty good though. Yeah, but I tried everything.

Starting point is 00:33:51 I tried everything. We love our friends in the sky. That's my point. But you got it. You love the friends in the sky. You should have taken them out. Three days of suffering. Yeah, you could have thrown them off the hill.

Starting point is 00:34:00 You drown them. What? Yeah, you drown them. No, I'm sorry. You drown them. Excuse me? You drown them. You take that bird you drown them. Whoa, whoa, whoa, no, I'm sorry. You drown them. Excuse me? You drown them. You take that bird, you go to your pool and-

Starting point is 00:34:07 Blblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblblbl You drown them. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha and rodency things or whatever. And I do, but you got to get rid of it. Cause it's suffering. It's crazy. It's awful when dogs do this. It's a bummer, but when they live, those three days for the bird is like, fucking kill me. Please fucking kill me.

Starting point is 00:34:34 Yeah, I don't know. I don't know birds. I don't know. I have a few. If I knew Bort. What? I do. I mean, I went to college with four or five of them.

Starting point is 00:34:41 Yeah, yeah. But I still talk to one of them. If there was like a 5% chance that he, it was just like, you know, a sprained neck or whatever, right? That's why I called. Because the worst would be like, I'll just leave it there.

Starting point is 00:34:52 Yeah. And then day three I go back there and he's still, you know what I mean? That would have been bad. That's true. Maybe he was paralyzed after that, you guys. Little bird wheelchair. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:35:00 Little bird wheelchair. You know, it's so funny, Andreas, you're trying to make fun of me. Like I have empathy for the little creatures in the world. You know what movie makes me really sad? What part? In Raising Arizona, when- One of my favorite movies of all time.

Starting point is 00:35:13 Me too. And when that, you know, the bad biker. Yes. Right? And he shoots that lizard. I don't know why, even as a young man, I went, oh. You know what else it is? That actor, that guy, he's so good

Starting point is 00:35:25 and you believe how he's so mean in his heart. And the music is so powerful. Yeah. God, that movie was good. If you haven't seen that movie. Couldn't recommend it more. It's, it's cause it's- Colin Brothers Finest.

Starting point is 00:35:38 It does two things, okay? In the same year they did this, there's two movies that are my favorite movies is this and also Evil Dead 2. Those two movies are just masterpieces, but- 89, 88. Yeah, this movie is so fucking good. And the beauty, her name is Ed

Starting point is 00:35:56 is one of the funniest things on earth. Yeah. He falls in love with a woman. Holly Hunter kills that movie. Cause Ed is such a beautiful like guy, guy's name. Look at Nicholas K, how young. You know the concept of this movie, they can't have a child and so they decide

Starting point is 00:36:07 they're gonna steal someone's baby who's an embarrassment of riches. Yeah. It's fucking great. It's a comedy though. Especially when Nicolas Cage goes up with the ladder into the fucking baby's room. At Nathan Arizona's house? Yeah, Nathan Arizona's house.

Starting point is 00:36:21 And there's that five minute montage of him trying to handle the babies. Yeah. Is so cleverly done, so cute. It's so good. It's such a good scene. There's another scene where he runs into his bedroom, right? Cause he has to, I forget what he has to do. And he sees a Playboy magazine on his bed

Starting point is 00:36:36 and he puts it underneath the thing. And then he walks away and then he comes back and looks at the Playboy and then puts it back in there. Cause he needs one more look. It's like those little things that makes that movie so special. That's such a great movie. You gotta watch that, okay?

Starting point is 00:36:50 But you should be studying for your test before you watch another movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So can we get you through school first? Yeah. Yeah, please. Because I don't want you to fail after all the work you put in.

Starting point is 00:36:58 When you think about it, she started the show as a senior in high school. I can't believe it. And now you're graduating college. That's so incredible. It really makes me sad. It makes me believe it. And now you're graduating college. That's so incredible. It really makes me sad. It makes me sad too. Because we're closer to death.

Starting point is 00:37:09 That's all that you and I are doing. Oh my, you really think of that? We're crawling towards death. There's death. Hey, we're on our way. And she's about to just grow into a fun adult life of fun and freedom. But you know who my fucking guy is I look at

Starting point is 00:37:21 to make me feel more like, he's like sort of like, if he dies, I'm fucked. Cause he's a little ahead of me. In the comedy scene? Yeah, yeah. He's a little ahead of me. I see him all the time. Marin?

Starting point is 00:37:33 No, and I look at him, no, it's like, no, smaller, smaller. Tiny or person? Than Marin, yeah. Brad Williams? No, in between, think in between. Cold, cold, hot? Also, I'm older than Brad. It's a guy that's older than me and I got me.

Starting point is 00:37:45 Oh, no, you're not. I am. No, little people are a thousand years old. He's been living forever. He's lived seven lifetimes. Yeah. We have no idea how old they are. You have to cut them in half and count their rings.

Starting point is 00:37:56 Yesterday, I saw Brad and I said a couple of things, some dwarf jokes in the green room, and I don't think it went over well in the room. He's our boy, wouldn't he? I just walked into the room, I saw him go, how's the carnival? I don't know why I said that. And then for some reason everyone was in there, I go, oh, they love candy corn.

Starting point is 00:38:12 I don't even know if that's a fact. They do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But my point is, I always keep a pocket. It's David Spade. Oh, Spade. So when I see Spade,

Starting point is 00:38:20 cause he's like five years older than me. And he looks good. He does. So I just go, oh, he looks good. So I'm gonna worry when he doesn't look good. Well, here's the problem. This isn't apples to apples. Do you know what I mean?

Starting point is 00:38:31 Don't do this. It's like, this is a zucchini to pear. Don't do this, right. No, because- Don't do this, right. Well, he takes care of himself a little bit. Why? He exercises.

Starting point is 00:38:40 I went hiking yesterday for so long. No fucking way. Yeah, so long. With whom? By myself, in the dark. Where? In the dark? Yeah, the one by so long. No fucking way. Yeah, so long. With whom? By myself, in the dark. Where, in the dark? Yeah, the one by our house. No proof.

Starting point is 00:38:49 And this time, you know where I go? No proof. There's a marker that I have. You know, there's a first bench on that. Now we go double that. Can I ask you something? Yeah, it's so scary. Can I recommend something as a friend?

Starting point is 00:39:01 Please don't hike in the dark. If you fall or slip or something bad happens, who the fuck is gonna get you? That's the thing I want. Oh, you want to go? Yeah, yeah. I'd rather you not. Yeah, the only thing that I'm worried about is bobcats.

Starting point is 00:39:15 Yeah, dude. I mean, or yeah, what about weirdos? What about some guy that's waiting to fucking kill you? Oh yeah. I mean, please don't hike at night. Why? There's other, there's people, families at night. Oh really?

Starting point is 00:39:29 I see them with the flashlights. I've seen Alpha Dog. I know what happens when you hike at night. You end up in a pit. Great movie. Wow. Please don't hike at night. Okay fine.

Starting point is 00:39:38 I'm concerned for your wellbeing. But do you want to hike during the day with me? I would love to go hiking. I'd love to. There's a hiking hill right by our houses. That's the one I wondered last night. Well, let's go. I kind of want to do it solo because I'll tell you why.

Starting point is 00:39:50 Can I tell you why? Can I tell you why though? Can I tell you why? Yes! It's pace. You know what I mean? I understand. Yeah, I put my hands behind my back

Starting point is 00:40:01 like an old Korean man. I do that. And I kind of mosey up there with music. Shuffle would be the word. I shuffle up there with music. And I go as long as I can and I come back down. I appreciate that. I respect that.

Starting point is 00:40:12 I would love to hike with you, but I totally understand that. That's fine. Yeah. Bandscape! Bandscape! The Chairman Pro. Whoa.

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Starting point is 00:42:33 and usage, accessories sold separately. You know what, there's an old saying, and it's from a sitcom. There's an old saying, it's from a sitcom, it's called Different Struggs. You know what I mean? What you talking about? Wheeless. Wheeless. Right. What you talking about? Willis.

Starting point is 00:42:45 Willis. Right. What you talking about Willis? Right? Yeah. That's what I want to say to you, dude. That was the wrong sitcom line. It really was, yeah.

Starting point is 00:42:53 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was trying to, yeah. You know what? I got it, Bob, I got you. There's an old sitcom line that you should, that speaks exactly to you about what we're talking about. Dynamite. No, no. That one's definitely not. No, no, no, that speaks exactly to you about what we're talking about. Dynamite. No, that one's definitely not.

Starting point is 00:43:07 No, no, no, that's not it? No, there is an old one that I gotta tell you. It's perfect for this to fucking teach you about this world. Give it to her. Give it to her, dude. Did I do that? Perfect. Wait, what sitcom is that?

Starting point is 00:43:22 Family Matters, that's fucking- Steve Urkel. That's Steve Urkel. That's one of his catchphrases? Did I do that? I don't know if that is. What? Are you insin... Did I do that? Did I do that?

Starting point is 00:43:32 That one you've heard of that? Yeah. Okay. Where did you fucking grow up? You don't know Did I Do That? I never saw that one. Steve Urkel. What do you...

Starting point is 00:43:40 I know that. Yeah, even the Spaniard fucking knows it. You're not the Google, I believe you. But you made me think that I'm wrong. Did I know that. Yeah, even the Spaniard fucking knows it. You're not the Google, I believe you. But you made me think that I'm wrong. Did I do that? Did I do that? I've met him a couple times.

Starting point is 00:43:51 Jaleel White. I like him a lot. Yeah. He's a sweet kid. I've heard he's great. He's a nice guy. Did I do that? Yeah, he would break something. Oh, I see, I remember now.

Starting point is 00:43:58 He was fantastic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There he is, yeah. By the way, this is a character that I'm sure, in this day and age, they would be like, it just feels like we're targeting a type of person. Right, if you wrote that character on a TV show, they'd be like, I don't know if we can do that.

Starting point is 00:44:13 There's no way. Isn't that fucking wild? Yeah, you know you used to call me at three in the morning randomly, back in the day when I lived on Beachwood, before I met Kaila. Ron Jeremy. No, it's a sitcom guy. You're not gonna believe it.

Starting point is 00:44:24 Hold on, hold on. And he always asks me, Hey man, I'm in town, whatcha doing? I go, I'm sleeping. By the sound of it. Hey man. Hey, it's me. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:44:37 Hold on. Hey. Yeah. Let me do it together. Yeah, too mad about Gary Coleman. He passed away. I'm the only one left Well, it's gotta be a small black guy. Yeah. Yeah, you got it bud. Oh go toward the light Emanuel Lewis. Yes. Yes, Webster. Yes Webster. I could just do it. So funny

Starting point is 00:44:59 He used to call you at three in the morning. Hey, man Yeah, hey, it's me. What you doing? E-dog. It's like, he would go, yeah, he'd go, meet me at, he would go, meet me at Fred 62s. I love that cafe. Yeah, yeah, and I'd be like, no, dude. Why not?

Starting point is 00:45:15 Never hung out with him once. Like I read this thing, this was fucking insane. It's supposed to, it really does, dude. You should try this. This is a trick. I know, I know, I know. No, no, this is a trick I'm trying to do is this. When you wake up in the morning, instead of brushing your teeth with your right hand,

Starting point is 00:45:31 do it with your left. And then when you get in the shower, instead of doing your normal shower routine, like what's the first thing you wash in the shower? My back. Right. So instead of doing your back, do your feet first and then do your face.

Starting point is 00:45:41 And like switch up the order. Why are you laughing at back? That's just weird. No, it's not. That's not. You're fucking weird. What are you doing? Don't you go head first? No, everybody does it different.

Starting point is 00:45:50 Head is last. No. What? Head's last. I actually agree. I do head and face last. Yeah, yeah. No, here's my order.

Starting point is 00:45:56 I do my butthole for about 20 minutes. I'll literally tell you my order, okay? So I'll take, you know, we've already established that that plastic thing that has a cloth. We already established that on this podcast. Sure. Right, so I pulled that out, right?

Starting point is 00:46:09 I put two different body- Body wash. Wash on it. Right. From two different brands. One of them probably like, you know, something that's like an Axe, some bad bullshit one, but then I'll put an organic like fancy one.

Starting point is 00:46:22 So you'll feed your dog's high-end food, but you're using Axe on your body? No, I put Axe, but then I put a high-, like fancy one. So you'll feed your dog's high-end food, but you're using ax on your body? No, I put ax, but then I put a high-end one that I got at a boutique place. Ooh. Yeah, so I'll combo it up. Upstairs, downstairs. Yeah, then I put it in a sud.

Starting point is 00:46:33 Then I do it back first. Back, back, arms, arms, chest, right? Then in between the sacks, scrub hard. What do you mean sacks? Is it singular? You have more than one sack? No, no, no, no, what? The sack. Five. Oh, do you mean sacks? Is it singular? You have more than one sack? No, no, no, what? The sack.

Starting point is 00:46:47 Five. Oh, I have two sacks. I have two sacks, right? Legs, and then what I do is rinse. Yeah. And then I do face with my face wash. Right. And then I do hair, and then I'm done.

Starting point is 00:46:57 I get that. What do you do? I first get in there and I lube up the loofah. I've got my nice little loofah. How do you get your back with a loofah? What do you mean? It's on a stick. Oh! You don't have a loofah. I've got my nice little loofah. How do you get your back with a loofah? What do you mean? It's got, it's on a stick. Oh!

Starting point is 00:47:07 You don't have a loofah stick? No. Oh, it's fantastic. It's actually my favorite because after you're done loofing, you can flip the stick around and foot it right up your ass. Yeah. Love.

Starting point is 00:47:16 You don't do that? You don't do a little rabbit tail? With a loofah stick though, cause I got one on the road. You can't get the real, like with the fucking one I have, you can really grind out your back. I don't need to. Rub it deep into the back.

Starting point is 00:47:28 I don't know if I need to. Okay. Cause I get a massage for that. No, it's just the deep skin. It has nothing to do with the muscles. This skin is never exposed to almost anything on your back. You don't really need to exfoliate your back. Oh, that's true, that's true.

Starting point is 00:47:40 What's exposed. So I do the loofah, I loofah- I do sand angels on the beach. I loofah, I do the loofah, I loofah- I do sand angels on the beach. I loofah, I get the loofah ready and I do chest, neck and back first. Great, great combo. Pitsy, pitsy, pitsy, pitsy. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:47:54 Then I go down to legs and feetsies. Yeah. And then I put the loofah down and I- Pssst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:08 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:15 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:21 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. of my nifkin and my butthole. And I really work this area. I really clean my butthole and my wiener. Uh-huh. I'm just gonna see how much you do. Yeah. Oh, okay, that's a lot.

Starting point is 00:48:33 That's a lot. And then finally I finish with the top half with face and hair. Yeah. Jewels. Jewels. I just do hair, shampoo, conditioner, and then body, and then face,

Starting point is 00:48:43 and then brush my teeth, and then that's it. Oh, actually, you know what? I lied. I, the very first thing I do is brush my teeth in the shower. You brush your teeth in the shower? Yeah. Yeah, me too.

Starting point is 00:48:53 I don't do any of it. You've never brushed your teeth? No. Let me see. Looks fine. Yeah. Let's get a hands. Who brushed their teeth in the shower?

Starting point is 00:49:00 Oh, wow. Not me. See, people, some people don't like it. I think it's perfect. I don't like it. I'm already there. It's like, you know, me. See, some people don't like it. I think it's perfect. I'm already there. It's like, you know, let me say honestly, it's like playing basketball on ice. How?

Starting point is 00:49:12 It just doesn't belong there. But you pee in the shower. No, no, time's up. I pee, I don't care. Stop, stop, stop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I pee in the shower too. He poops in the shower.

Starting point is 00:49:20 I don't poo in the shower, that's insane. We did a whole episode about it. You smooshed the poop down the drain. You talked about it. Yeah. One time. Okay, that's insane. We did a whole episode about it. You smushed the poop down the drain, you talked about it. Yeah. One time. Okay, that's- One fucking time. Too many times.

Starting point is 00:49:29 That's not a fucking, one time. One time, too many times. Yeah, yeah, okay. No, that's- One time, too many times. One time. I did it a month ago. You've done it more than once.

Starting point is 00:49:35 You pooed in the shower? Yeah, I had to go. Exactly, that's a good one. It was diarrhea. Yeah, there you go. Yeah. Well, you've done it often. Yeah, I'm not, I don't shame Carlos for doing that.

Starting point is 00:49:43 I get it. No, you should. Okay. You do not poop in the shower. Do not poop in the shower. You do what've done it often. Yeah, I'm not, I don't shame Carlos for doing that. I get it. No, you should. Okay. You do not poop in the shower. Do not poop in the shower. You do what you need to do. Thank you, thank you. Cause then, then the water, it's gonna smell,

Starting point is 00:49:53 you're gonna, mm. Okay, please, I need a mirror when I brush my teeth. What are you looking at? So you can go. You have to do. I have my phone, I have my phone. I could, if I needed a phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:50:03 I have my phone. I just don't, I feel it, like it's not, it doesn't belong there. I get this, people say this, but I think it does, cause it's the first thing I have my phone. I have my phone. I could find it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have my phone. I just don't, I feel it. Like it's not, it doesn't belong there. I get this. People say this, but I think it does because it's the first thing I like to do. It's warm.

Starting point is 00:50:10 The water on your back is so warm and you're brushing under the warmth. It's just, it's a perfect combination. It just seems like you're doing your taxes in the water. It doesn't make sense. Like you're with a cockle, like, abacus, whatever you use. So, so hygienically, you're cleaning your body

Starting point is 00:50:23 and then also cleaning your mouth doesn't belong in the cleaning- Maybe you're right, but I don't, I just can't, I would never do it. I think you should, will you try it? Okay. Please. I'd like, unfortunately, I want to know how Andres does his, but I know it's going to be

Starting point is 00:50:35 fucking really weird and annoying. How do you do your shower? It's like north to south. You start up top and go down? Yeah. Wow, always. Always. All right, so everybody, okay, Carlos,

Starting point is 00:50:46 what's your shower routine? It's a lot like Rudy's actually. Well, you like baths, right? Cause you like to have the water on your clit. I do like baths actually. I love baths. Me too, who doesn't? They're fucking amazing,

Starting point is 00:50:59 but he likes the water rush on his little clit. Yeah, I just, in terms of baths, what you got me for my birthday. Was it bad? No, it's not that bad. It's just like, I don't know what the point is. She gives me like- Bath salts?

Starting point is 00:51:12 No, it was flowers. Like full blown petals. Oh no, it's actually the aromatics, it's good for you. Really? It's supposed to calm you down. Yeah, it's really- But then I gotta pick all the shit up. You have someone clean your fucking house for you.

Starting point is 00:51:23 You don't do that. I don't know. She's right there. She gave herself garbage. Yeah, shit, when's the last time you cleaned my house? Months. Months. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:51:32 Get back to it. It's too much. It's too much. Is it? I got a new person. You did? Yeah. One person or more than one?

Starting point is 00:51:39 It's a cabal of Hispanics. It's a cabal. A cabal of Hispanics. Wow. Just one pickup truck, 35 Hispanics. And they're amazing. Yeah? Yeah. Where did you find these people?

Starting point is 00:51:49 Through my friend, why? Cause what if I need somebody? It's through Gilbert. Gilbert, Gilbert. She's great. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I have a woman that I'm dearly, dearly in love with. Well, then why'd you ask me? In case she doesn't do it anymore.

Starting point is 00:52:00 What if she stops one day? Yeah. She's incredible. Dude, this woman is so beautiful and nice. She really, I'm not, I'm actually not even making a comedy joke right now. Yeah. She's such a lovely person. Her heart is so beautiful.

Starting point is 00:52:13 She walks in the door and sits and plays with a dog. She's like, my friend, my friend. And she'll sing to the dog and sit and play with the dog. It makes my soul so happy when I see her. And she's always in a good mood. And I've told her multiple times. I've said, you know, if you want me to get you food or you want to eat or whatever,

Starting point is 00:52:32 anything in the house you can have, always, anything. I've never seen her eat. I've never seen her drink water. She's never gone to the bathroom. Never. I'm always like, you know, you can have any of the food in the fridge, you can do anything you want. She's like, no.

Starting point is 00:52:47 Okay. No, it's okay. But do you do the Bobby Lee test of deception? I leave money all over the place. That's what I do. Yeah, I leave thousands and thousands of dollars. Deception, and what I do is I leave random money, tens, twenties, sometimes a hundred, in places

Starting point is 00:53:03 to see if they take and they never take. They never take. That's the test. Cause if they take, I fire. You kill. You don't kill, but do you do that? Well, I went to a jewelry store,

Starting point is 00:53:16 I got a bunch of loose diamonds. That's what you have to do. And I'll just put diamonds all over. That's insane. No, but she's so, it's like, she's so honest. If she did take from me, I don't care. She's such a good person. If she was like, if I caught her and she was like,

Starting point is 00:53:32 ah, I steal this, I'd be like, okay. Well, I guess if you were, you're cleaning and you saw like a random dollar bill, you would in your head, go, oh, that's a test of deception. Yeah, yeah. Right? I passed this test recently, I'm proud to say. What happened? I was at Mercedes and, I'm proud to say. What happened?

Starting point is 00:53:45 I was at Mercedes and there was a $5 bill on the bench and I just took a picture of it and I didn't take it. Okay, this is not the same scenario, you're an idiot, you should have taken the $5 bill. Really? What the fuck? In the wild, yes. In the wild is fine.

Starting point is 00:53:57 In the wild, yes. Money in the wild? I thought I was being filmed or something. For what? Like, streamer, plane streamer. Oh yeah, sometimes they do that, right? I know, but what would be the, you picked up a random fight.

Starting point is 00:54:07 Was there anybody around you? No one. That's your money. I left. Okay. Have you seen these? Carlos, have you seen these? Okay. Where they like, they'll have like a little girl like on a bench.

Starting point is 00:54:19 Oh yeah. Okay. So what I'm talking about, they're tests of trust. I hate that. Right? Where it's like, you know, like a woman will be sitting there, right, who's like a plant, right? And then some guy will hit on her, right?

Starting point is 00:54:33 And some stranger's, hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm so grateful I'm not in that. Yeah. Because I don't think, I don't know, I think I would fail. You'd walk away. I would just be like, I don't know, that's weird. You know what I mean, I'd walk away. Or if a little girl comes in, excuse me, sir, I don't think, I don't know, I think I would fail. You'd walk away. I would just be like, I don't know, that's weird. You know, and I'd walk away.

Starting point is 00:54:45 Or if a little girl comes in, excuse me, sir, I don't have any water. And I'd be like, oh, you do here when you work, huh? Get the fuck away from me. Yeah, they catch me doing that, I'm fucked, dude. Yeah, you're done. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, those tests are-

Starting point is 00:55:00 What would you do? That's the name of the show. Yeah. It's called John, John, John Quinones, What Would You Do, right? Isn't that what it's called? What Would You Do? Yeah, What Would You Do?

Starting point is 00:55:09 If I saw that, yeah, that's what it's called. What Would You Do? Yeah, that's what it is. Literally the show we're talking about. What Would You Do? Honestly, I'm so aloof in public. Me too. I'm probably just walking by.

Starting point is 00:55:19 Yeah, I don't know. I'm not gonna stay there and take care of it. Is there anything that you, a punk that you did that was like, that aired that went crazy? Is there a punk that I did that went, I mean, you mean like, like it did well? I don't- Yeah, but that was like, they were mad, like super mad or?

Starting point is 00:55:36 I mean, no, I don't think there was anything that we did that, like everything that aired kind of went, I will say, oh, there were, no, that's not true. There's so many lives you've lived. There's one that we did in the Hills and I don't remember who it was and it was a bad idea. I don't remember the girl. I don't remember.

Starting point is 00:55:53 We were in the Hills and I was pretending like I was lost and they were house sitting. And I pretended like I was a guy who was just like lost in the Hills and my car died. And somehow we figured out a way to get me inside of the home. And this woman thought she was like trapped with a, the hitchhike killer or something like that.

Starting point is 00:56:13 It was fucked. It was such a bad bit. It was so stupid and so overblown. This woman was on the phone with her mother, like just bawling, crying. And they never aired that either? No, did not air that one. No, no, no.

Starting point is 00:56:24 No, I mean, the aired ones are, you know, like Efron hitting an old woman. We hit an old woman with a car, a stunt woman. Oh, you knew that guy from then? That's the first time I met him. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, that was the first time I met that guy.

Starting point is 00:56:35 Anyway. Deep Hollywood connections. Well, first of all, I was a kid, I was an Actron punk that no one knew and people still didn't know that I did that. I remember you then. And I got paid like fucking $40. Yeah, but I was remember this guy's on the no one knew and people still didn't know that I did that. I remember you then. And I got paid like fucking $40. Yeah, but I was a remember this guy's on the rise.

Starting point is 00:56:49 You know what's so funny? Here I am shooting Punk'd. No, no, listen how funny this is. Here I am shooting Punk'd, shooting a TV show, writing it and being an actor in it, working at the studio and I was worried about rent every month. That's insane.

Starting point is 00:57:00 I was so worried. There was a month that I almost didn't pay rent because I got paid so little money from the show. Because you make a week. It wasn't a week, I was so worried. Yeah. There was a month that I almost didn't pay rent. Yeah. Because I got paid so little money from the show. Cause you make a week. It wasn't a week, it was an episode. You got paid an episode. How much did you get an episode? I think it was $1,500 or something like that, an episode.

Starting point is 00:57:15 Yeah, but then with taxes and all that stuff. Yeah, to pay my agent, my lawyer. $700. Yeah, 800 bucks, 700 bucks. Yeah. So how many episodes did you do a month? Oh, no, it was not a month. In total, we only did 10 or 11.

Starting point is 00:57:24 I don't even know what we did. And that was your only income. I was forced to work for the studio full-time. Like I got put in that system and I was working for the studio. Wow. Yeah, like I was writing for them and all that stuff. And I was, yeah.

Starting point is 00:57:38 You got ripped off. Yeah, we got cooked. Those guys were making millions of dollars. We were fucking, I mean, that's Hollywood. That's what they do. My mad TV was $4,500 a week. Those guys were making millions of dollars. We were fucking, I mean, that's Hollywood and jet. That's what they do. They take it. My mad TV was $4,500 a week. That's great.

Starting point is 00:57:48 Yeah. That's really good money. But you only got four the first year. What do you mean? Oh, only got four episodes. Okay, right. And then you can't do anything else. Yeah, and they hold you.

Starting point is 00:57:58 So then you're like, what am I gonna? That's just- What the fuck am I gonna? It's weird to be on TV. Yeah. And people from home being like, dude, you're on TV. I know you get this. And you're like, I can't pay rent.

Starting point is 00:58:08 I can't do anything. It's fucked. The business is fucked. That's why you- You're still eating at Arby's and like- Arby's? What are you, rich? I know, I know.

Starting point is 00:58:16 I was eating at- Exactly. Maybe out of the trash can behind the Arby's. Yeah, well, at the comedy store- Have you guys got any beef you're throwing away? Beans on toast is pretty hungry. Yeah, but out at the comedy store, they're like, dude, congratulations're throwing away? Beans on toast is pretty hungry. Yeah, but out at the comedy store, they're like, dude, congratulations.

Starting point is 00:58:28 You're like, yeah, I'm making less money than I- Than I was before. Before. Oh, dude, are you kidding me? Free meals at comedy clubs? Oh my God. When they were like, when I would go and play those clubs, I'd be like, hey, can we get lunch and dinner here?

Starting point is 00:58:41 Yeah. And they were like, what? Why? I'm like, I don't know, pay for food. But I played it right. I remember the first year I got on it, I can't say her name, the Hispanic girl. We all know her, I think.

Starting point is 00:58:54 Right? And so there was like a couple of weeks where we weren't in anything. Didn't make a sketch. Not a single sketch, right? And all the white new dudes, people were getting everything. White new dudes.

Starting point is 00:59:07 Yeah, and then so I remember her coming into my dressing room crying. She goes, this is fucked up. I go, what is it? And she's like, I mean, you're Asian, I'm Hispanic and we're not gonna hate you, right? I'm gonna go to the president of the company. Of Fox?

Starting point is 00:59:23 No, of the show, the guy that owns the show. Oh, right. Who's like this old Hollywood mogul, right? I can say his name, he's a great guy, David Salzman. Okay. He did Dallas and Judge Judy, I mean, this is an old guy, right? And I grabbed her by the wrist, I go, please don't.

Starting point is 00:59:38 And I go, and if you do, leave my name out of it. We will be fired. Yeah, yeah. And she's like, no, I'm making a stank. This is bullshit. She goes knocks on his door and just went into a cry fast, right? Two weeks later, I never saw her again.

Starting point is 00:59:54 You got fired. Yeah. That's what happens. And I was in nothing and I just, my fingers on the fucking dressing room wall, just hanging. Bobby, yes. They're taking my ankle trying to get me out. I'm like, I'm not leaving.

Starting point is 01:00:09 I think that was the right move. It took years for me to get anything really legitimate, but I just, I could barely made every, you know what I mean? But you didn't get fired. You gotta play it smart. You didn't get fired. Yeah, I'm a cockroach. You gotta play it smart.

Starting point is 01:00:24 Something that you don't, she doesn't have to'm a cockroach. You gotta play it smart. Yeah. Something that you don't, but she doesn't have to. With her generation, she can do whatever she wants. Can I tell you another story about it? I have to tell you this, so. I'm not gonna name any names, but there was another female comic from the store, right?

Starting point is 01:00:40 That was gonna test for MADtv. Whitney. No, I can't tell you. Okay. Right. And so we were, I can't tell you. Okay. Right. And so we were, I remember seeing her and I go, oh, so are you nervous about the test? Yeah.

Starting point is 01:00:53 And she goes, I ain't doing it. And I go, why? She goes, I need 10 grand. To test? I need 10 grand, because you know, you negotiate. Yeah, I know, was she famous already? No. Oh. She was just the same comic guy I was.

Starting point is 01:01:05 Sure. Nobody. Right. And I go, you're asking for 10,000 an episode? Because the initial thing is 4,500, right? And she goes, yeah. And I go, oh, I'm testing. I don't care.

Starting point is 01:01:18 They could give me peanuts. Yeah. I'm fucking testing. Air one peanuts though. Right. Yeah. And then so five years after that, I was at a restaurant. one peanuts though. Right. Yeah. And then so five years after that, I was at a restaurant. She served you.

Starting point is 01:01:28 Yeah. Oh. And you know what she said to me? She goes, I should have taken the 4500. Oh my God, that hurts my heart. And I swear to God, and I was like, my heart cracked. You stiffed her on the tip. I go, yeah, but hey dude, can I get the fucking ketchup? You know what I mean?

Starting point is 01:01:44 You guys have hot sauce? I asked you for the hot sauce, you know what I mean? I asked you for the hot sauce. You know what I mean? Yeah. Oh, that's awful. And she never worked again. Never saw her gun. My God. She should have taken it.

Starting point is 01:01:52 Yeah. She would have killed it on that show. Oh. We need to figure out a way to have Rudy get her act together so we don't have a failure on our hands. Oh, that's the- That's a lesson that needs to happen today.

Starting point is 01:02:06 Did you hear the lessons today? Yeah, I'm scared. No, no, you don't have to be scared. Well, you should be. You have to make the right decision. No, you should be scared. But how do you know that you're making the right decisions? Fuck, that's a good question.

Starting point is 01:02:17 That is a very good question. I actually don't know. Well, I mean, the opportunities that you get- Seize them. You seize them. You don't go against them. Because I really honestly believe that one day, and don't give me that face.

Starting point is 01:02:31 Don't give him that face. Yeah, one day you're gonna look back at certain times in your life, you're gonna go, oh, I didn't see it for what it was. And say that to all of our fans too. Sometimes it's like, if it's right there in front of you, the worst that can happen is that it just doesn't work the way you think, but you gotta keep trying it.

Starting point is 01:02:47 Like for instance, if you, if Seven Echies wanted to do a podcast with you individually and you know what I mean? And they go, you wanna try it? Right? I think your instinct would be, no, I don't wanna do it. Right? Yeah. Yeah. Well then don't, but I think you'd regret it.

Starting point is 01:03:02 Because the iron's hot now. Right. It won't be iron's hot now. Right. It won't be 10 years from now. If you try it and it doesn't work, all that happened was it didn't work, it doesn't matter. You don't lose, you know? It just didn't work. Because in this moment in your life,

Starting point is 01:03:14 you can make as much money as you can, and then later, you'll have a little savings or whatever, but I honestly believe that life is hard, and it's hard out there to make a living. And we've seen people struggle and it's like, you know, I feel like I've and me and Andrew both have made decisions that were like at the end of the day, you know, beneficial.

Starting point is 01:03:38 Well, and I made some failures. I did a lot of failures. Me too, me too, me too. I mean, most of the things I did was not a failure. Most of the things I did didn't work out the way I thought they might've worked out. Bad sitcoms, bad scripts and testing, and it doesn't work, it just didn't work. And then you go, go, go until it works,

Starting point is 01:03:54 but not seizing the opportunity is tough and we want you to win. All we care about is you winning. I think I am more open though. I know you are. I think you've grown so much on this show. It is crazy. So much.

Starting point is 01:04:07 Well, end the show, tell them goodbye. Thank you for being a bad friend. Fantastic. Yeah, woo Yeah, woo Yeah

Bad Friends - Rudy's Fantastic Fail

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