Bad Friends - Something’s Bubbling

Episode Date: August 24, 2026

Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/c/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Quince, Quo, Acorns & Mountain Dew • Quince: Go to https://Quince.com/badfriends for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. • Quo: Try QUO for free PLUS get 20% off your first 6 months when you go to https://quo.com/BADFRIENDS. • Acorns: Head to https://acorns.com/badfriends or download the Acorns app to get started. • Mountain Dew: Enjoy the refreshing citrus kick of Mountain Dew, an American Original. Tasting Great Since ’48. Look for Mountain Dew in stores near you at https://mountaindew.com. YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Audio Subscribe: https://apple.co/31Jsvr2 Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Scotland in Space 4:20 Jimothy the Raccoon 12:00 Hawaii Doesn't Want Us There 18:15 Moana Fights Gentrification 25:00 Mohawk Alley 32:00 Something's Bubbling 38:00 The Coward's Door 42:00 We're Heated 48:00 Hook It, Papa Smurf 53:00 Goodbye Teeth 59:00 The Dark Wizard More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@7EQUIS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This video contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Right? Anything you want. You got it. Pretty woman. You got it. Anything at home. Blue by you, baby. I love Roy Orbis.

I know you do. And here's a fact. I'm on an Orbison. Every baby he's ever had came out with sunglasses. Every single baby. That's a fact. Google it. Google it.

Ain't going out like that. Ain't going out like that Ain't going out like that See I have songs in my head as well You're a big song guy Yeah Cypress Hill baby You two are bad friends Who are these two idiots

Who are white dude I'm an Asian dude You too Or something We're bad friends Who got back their new Their new old car You did

Ain't going out like that Ain't going out like that Ain't going out like that Ain't going out Like ha Ha Getting it out Getting it out

It's good to see you man We talk forever We've been talking forever We keep talking We keep talking We talk until you To stop listening And that's them the rules

And I hope you keep listening I just got back from Scotland No you didn't I did You told me you didn't go What? Yeah you told me you didn't go Oh yeah I did tell it

Yeah Did you go? Yeah Why would you tell me you didn't go I like to keep you on your toes No no what It's so crazy He's like, I'm in New York.

I like to keep you out your toes, tone. You and Scotland goes, no, I'm in New York. I'm in New York. That's what he said. So what's the truth? I went to New York to get a slice. Yeah. I went to Cambodia.

Anyone can say things. That's my point. I lied to you. Actually, I didn't end up the day I was supposed to be there. We got our flight diverted halfway there. I'm texting, I think I texted Carlos. I had to go down to Atlanta. There was a tornado in New York, not a real thing.

So they made us go to Atlanta. Then from Atlanta, they were like, We're going to get to New York tonight. I was like, great, I'll make my flight to Scotland. We take off my flight to Scotland also takes off. Into space. Yeah, yeah, wow, because that's a space move. Well, that's where Scotland is in space.

Scotland's in space. So I went to Scotland, it was amazing. I had so much fun. I ended up going a day late, but it was great. It was great. Scottish. Yeah? And all the Scots.

All the Scots were like. He's coming down the hill. You like Scotland? You like our food now, Andrew? Do you? Do you, Andrew? You talk about it on bad friends? You like my food.

No, Andrew. Really good. Is it good? Yeah. Did we talk bad about their food on the show? People got mad at me. People came out to me in the restaurant. They're like, is the food as bad as you talk about in bad French?

I was like, no, food's great. And they're like, no. We never went to Scotland. That's what I'm saying. But I'd been. Why would you say that? Because I'd been before. Yeah.

It improved. Okay. Is it? Is it better than New York? Ain't nothing better than a slice in New York. Hey, how you do? I ain't forget about it. When I walk her.

Around New York City, I get a slice. Yeah. No, it was great. And then my buddy Joey's wife ordered pizza for everyone late night hanging out. I was like, what a good move. And then she goes, I got three pepperonies and one corn and chicken. And I was like, that's not a real pizza. I've never heard of corn and chicken in my entire life.

It's a pair. Wait, wait. It's a big hit in Scotland. Wait, wait. There's corn in the chicken. Corn and chicken pizza. Yeah. Never seen it in my life.

I prefer the chicken and the corn. Yeah. That's more of a difficult process to make. Put the chicken in the corn. No. I put little chickens inside the kernel. That works. Yeah.

Someone got a haircut, huh? Your hair sliced. Slice and diced. Yeah, me too, dude. Look at me. I got a snip too. We all got snips. It's so hot, that's why.

It's... Is it global warming? Way too hot. It's a myth. You think it's a myth? I don't know. I think you're a myth. I think you're a myth.

I think you're a mythological. You're a mythological creature. Yeah, yeah. You're a siren like I talked about earlier. Yeah. Dude, what if we find out he goes home to his wife and he talks with a regular American accent? This is all a big put on for the past six years of our life. Exactly.

No, dude. No, but Scotland was great. It was also hot in England, which is impossible. It was hot. Yeah, it's bad, dude. All the wildfires in Europe. Oh, I know. Oh, yeah, Spain, right in France.

Yeah, in France? All the wildfires? What happened in Spain? Yeah. Lots of fires, yeah. This happened in Spain today. Hundreds of migrants with wetsuits and inflatables reach Spain's. And when they say migrants as Mexicans, they swam a long way.

That's so far. That's a long way. Across the Atlantic. Yeah. The African Mexicans. Yeah. So this is them jumping the border? He has Burberry.

Yeah. They give that out for free now if you're, if you're enter the country. Yeah. They're saying, what's up? Well, so. Wow. Oh, look at that. Who cuts the fence?

I want to know the guy that cuts the fence. What do you mean cuts the fence? Well, because you see them going sneaking through the fence. I want to know who's clipping it. Who's got the wire cutters to cut to the fence? Wow. See, they're handing them out waters. You got the Edgar cut.

They climbed the fence. What are you talking about? They just cut through you. They had a video. They were just, someone had cut a hole in the fence and they were going right through it. Huge. Oh, you know what I'm addicted to? Jimithy.

Jimithy. Oh, it's so cute. Who did? Who is it? Skunk, right? What is it? Who is Timothy, dude? I tell you, you don't know about Jimithy guy?

I'm behind. Oh, the raccoon. Oh, guy, dude. I want one. You want a handicap raccoon? Yeah. It's a skunk. Well, it used to be.

What is it? It's a raccoon. It's a raccoon. My raccoon. No, but I think you're still correct. I think a handicapped raccoon is a skunk. Maybe. I think that's what they are.

Yeah. But let me tell you something, if I had never heard of Jimithy and I was in my backyard smoking a cigarette or whatever. And saw it? I would freak the fuck out. The world's coming to an end. I go, oh my God, did you hit it with a bat? You know?

Don't kill Jimmy. Yeah, I would kill Jimithy. No, no. Wouldn't you freak the fuck out if you had never heard of Jimithy and you saw Jimith in your backyard? Oh, he got that triple S, that short spine syndrome. Oh. That sounds like a Theo Vaughnism. Yeah.

They got that short spine syndrome, dude. Yeah. Jimithy, dude. There was a Chinese guy with one eye with short spine syndrome. That's a Tijuana von bit. We had a lot of good, a lot of bad friends loved over there, man.

Humans can get it too, just FYI. Oh, let me see human. Well, no, I don't, but Carl- Oh, wow. Carlos, what do you go? Why do you go darker? He goes so dark. Yeah.

By the way, Carlos's hair is coming in. Oh, yeah. Look at, just bend down a little bit. Look at that, dude. It's like getting full. I said he's, what if you hate it? What if it all grows in and you're like, I didn't like it? I didn't want it.

I wanted to be bald. That is a fear for sure. You do, huh? No, but I'm into it. You're going to grow up really long, though? I'm just going to go as long as possible. Like, see what my... I have a new gay barber and I'm going to let him...

Oh, I love gay barbers. Oh, they're my favorite. Yeah. Slice and dice you. Yeah. He's great. Spin you around in that chair. You want crap or you want square in your back?

No, I mean, I wanted to do a line here too. Oh, you want like a cool, like a young guy? Like a cool young hip guy? Yeah, from the 90s. The trip was incredible. Then I went to Jolly Old England, had a good little time in England. Met some cool people. I met the owner of Palace, you know, Palace Skate Shop.

Oh, I love Palace. I know. I met the owner. Wow. Pretty cool. Yeah. And I was like, I own. So let's talk about when you were gone, what my week looked like.

What happened? What? Bad stuff? No, not bad stuff. I didn't leave the house for five days in a row. Why? Oh, you were not feeling. You talked.

We called. Yeah, I wasn't feeling well. I was bed rotting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I watched things. Yeah.

Ken Burns, you know. You're on a Ken Burns kick lately. You're on a documentary. Yeah, yeah. What do you watch? And I didn't, I just, I just had sex. With Ken Burns. Yes, yeah.

Very tight. Incredible. Very tight. Historical. Yeah. It's like rust his butthole. Like an army ration can. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, some gold. It's great. Yeah. You're going to try again at Ken Burns. What historical documentaries do you do? you ripped through? I saw Vietnam again. Civil War. Civil War. Yeah, it's a good one. It's a good war. Winter Soldier. Yeah, Winter Soldier was a good historical. I merged. Did that. Oh, I saw another comment. I saw

another comment today on the internet about Odyssey about someone had like, what's her name had her ears. She had three whole whole piercings in her ears. And they were like, you couldn't cover that up for the, you know, for the historical reference. The actress, what's her name? Sendea. She had like multiple ear piercings or something. Well, she's a god. So it doesn't matter. God's can have pierces. Yeah, they can have whatever they want. I don't disagree. Yeah. I don't disagree.

Poseidon can have a piercing in his penis. He did. That's where it came. That's called the Poseidon Pierce. Yeah. Yeah, but you got to watch it, dude. I know, I didn't have a dime of time. I was having a good time jumping around.

I feel like you're not going to watch it in the theater. I'm good, but I got to tell you the last time I looked, I told Carlos I was like, look for me and there was no C. Everything was sold out. Everything still sold out, dude. Yeah. It's like impossible to get a couple of scenes. Well, you want to see it in an 870 millimeter. You have to.

No, you don't. I saw it at the regal North Hollywood, a shit theater. These guys have both said you should see it in 70. Yeah. I'm gonna wait to go till it thins out. You promise me you're gonna watch it? Scouts honor. Scouts honor.

Yeah, yeah. Scouts on a. Yeah. Blow. I rewatch that. Blow? I rewatch Blow. I rewatch, catch me if you can on the plane.

One of the greatest, I mean, one of the greatest. You know what's great about that is comforting. You're comforted by these movies. I don't know why, but I love it so much. I know. I have it. like comforting move. The scene, the scene of him in the hotel negotiating her price and then tricking her by giving her like a bigger check than he owes her and her giving him cash. Is that Scorsese?

No, Spielberg. No, Spielberg. Wow. Does he miss that guy? My God. That scene was so good, dude, with her, with Jennifer Garner. Oh, and she's like, how much would I cost if I was in a gift shop? What a line, dude. Watch, what's disclosure day. It's out and streaming. Right now? Yeah. Okay, I can watch watch it home. You're going to see the downfall. What? The downfall of Spielberg. No, shut up. Was it good?

Okay. I'm sure he's still the man. It was okay. Yeah. Well, it's blunt, right? Yeah. Yeah. She's great.

Yeah, she's good in it. Not her fault. It's never her fault. Who wrote it? Spielberg, I think. No, no. There's no way he wrote that. David Kep.

The guy who did Jurassic Park. It's too close to close encounters. I love close encounters. It's... It has that. vibe that we need to get here. Sure. Right to see the alien.

Yeah. Yeah. And then I slipped into the Maryland Monroe document around the plane, which I tell me, I don't know nothing. I got to tell you. Excuse me, master. I know nothing about her. Okay.

The mystery, what is it called? The mystery of Marilyn Monroe. The amount of tapes that this guy has who put this together of like confidential audio tapes, like calls between her and the president and stuff. It's crazy. I mean, so obvious they had her murdered. Like so clearly they had her killed, pilled up and killed, and they covered it all up.

And so many people knew. Like everyone in Hollywood knew because she was rubbing elbows with people she shouldn't have rubbed elbows. Is she hotter than Margo Robbie, though? 100%. She was the hottest star I think we've ever had. Ever, ever, ever. Dude, they have video of her. This is pre-liphylor.

She was. She should have been in the Odyssey. Yeah. You know who Elizabeth Taylor was beautiful back then? Stunning. Stunning. What I'm saying is this is pre-getting work done. This is pre-getting work done.

And you see her without any makeup. And Marilyn Monroe. Look at how beautiful. I'm more of Elizabeth Taylor. Do you like how I look, Robert? Yeah. She's hot, dude. That's a good.

That was a little Taylor. Yeah. No, but Marilyn Monroe, stunning. Stunning. Oh, my God. Look at her face, dude. She looks like, Julie Andrews was hot like that when she was young. Yeah, she was beautiful.

Yeah. But Marilyn Monroe, you could tell, man, that was Hollywood weirdo stuff, weirdo stuff, dude. Yeah. Also, by the way, I called because I wanted to find out what was going on for your birthday, and you're traveling on your birthday. What's with you avoiding fun on your birthday? Why does it have to be on my birthday? It doesn't, but it's fun when it's on your birthday.

Okay, you canceled Hawaii. I'm not, what do you mean? I didn't cancel Hawaii. That's what they said. No, we just haven't booked it yet. Are you going to Hawaii? Are you going to Hawaii? Maybe.

No, if you don't, it's going to really upset me. Pretty woman. Anything you want. You got it. Okay, anyway, yeah, are you going? You know why I can't go. I mean. Do you know why? Why? Because there's no golf courses out there?

Well, there's nothing but golf courses out there. First of all, second of all, the amount of things I'm seeing on the internet, tourists go away. Hawaii doesn't want us there. That's true. Read it. It's all over the news. Go away tourists. They do not want us there. They want us there. No, they don't. I promise it when you go there. Google Hawaii tourists go away, and I'm telling you, it's every news article now. They're tired of it. They want us out. They don't want howlis. I'm a howlie and I got to get out of there. No whites. Get out. Anti-tourists. They're doing it now. It's like a huge protest. They're beating up fucking tourists because they're kicking the shit out of them. They don't want them there. Yeah. And you could pass. You got the position. I do pass. Yeah, me. I'm a howly dog. Yeah. Visitor rivals dropped roughly 829,000 falling five, almost 5% recently because of this protest. That's a lot, dude. It's a lot of people. They don't want them around. So what am I going to do? Do I have to put on, I got to do brownface to fit in? Yeah. I'm telling you right now, you have so many fans out there that you're going to be fine.

Yeah, you're going. I'm going. Yeah, if you don't go, I'll go. If you don't go, I'll be so upset at you. I'll go. Is he, is that true? You'll be mad? No, no, no, that he's going to go.

I don't know, yeah. Andrew would never lie to you. Yeah. Look at me right now, dude. Scouts on. Scouts on. Scouts on. Scouts on all.

Scouts on all. I'm going to go. For you, I'll go. Okay. I'm mad. I think we should do a Hawaiian version of bad friends out. I totally agree.

I'm mad that we're not doing anything for your birthday. We'll celebrate before. But on the 16th, I'll be there. My birthday is September 17th. On the 16th, I'll be there. Why don't we have the dinner then? We can.

I have a tour. I have a date in Salem, Oregon or whatever. You don't even know where you're... I don't know where I'm going, but I say, I have a date somewhere. You know, you don't have cats. No cats. So this is what a cat does.

When a cat leaves for the vet, because I don't take all three cats. the vet sometimes. Can't. Too many cats. Yeah. But when that cat comes back, it's as if those two other cats

have never met that cat before. Because something happened. No, they smell something. Right? So they start hissing at each other. Oh, wow. It's really sad. It's like if you went to Scotland,

came back, I'm like, it's like, who are you? Because they saw the other side. No, it's a smell thing. Yeah, they picked up his scent while they were there. Yeah. Another thing is that I have now,

because Kalila left, she got a new dog. She left for Hawaii. So the dog's at my house now. Her name is a lady. So now I have four dogs and three cats. And sometimes Jules just leaves. She's like, I'm going to a rave.

You know what I mean? I go. And I have seven animals in the house. It stresses me the fuck out. Too many animals. Feline non-recognition aggression happens when one cat smells completely different and is mistaken for a stranger.

So they think the cat is not who it was before. Yeah. Well, perhaps it's no longer. the same cat. Yeah. What if they switch out cats behind our back? Oh. Something could be...

No, I know that it's my cat. How do you know? Because I memorized all the little things. They're getting better. They're getting better. They're getting good at duplication. Really? Like, you know, like Gooney has like one little stripe on his nose.

I recognize, you know. Be careful. What do you mean? You might be, you might have inherited like a cat from the machine. Like they could have fabricated this cat, send it in your house. Why would they do that? Exactly. Why would they do it?

No, no, explain to me why would they do it? Camera cat. That thing could be filled with cameras. Okay, anyway, I'm not falling for this. Your lies anymore. That's fine. Yeah. Yes, you can clone a cat.

Yeah. Yeah, but that would take months and months. Now for them now, now they're doing it fast. 24 hour. 24 hour flip. They're doing it. Wow. Nuclear transfer.

Is it cheaper now? Because remember we Googled it years ago? 35 grand. That's still, if you loved. I think Tom Brady did that with his dog, I think. Yeah. I think Tom Brady did it with Tom Brady. Yeah.

I think he's a clear. clone of himself. Like Merrill Streep did it, I think. She cloned her dogs. Wow. Yeah. You would never. What do I mean? Clown? No, smart people don't do that. It's like a... You know what? I would clone one. Goby. It's Kobe. Yeah. I love her so much. Goby forever. Yeah. It's just like, when Jules calls, because all the dogs sleep in her room, but Gobi will stay out. What do you mean? It's just like, of course they sleep in her room. I can't deal with it. She's a protective force. They feel safe around her. No, no, no. Your room is a chaotic. There's no chaos. There's just, there's a lot of fluids. A lot of fluids. So wet. The whole room is wet. It's moist. It's humid.

It's Miami. It's dripping. Yeah. It's the cold. My room's like Miami. Yeah, yeah. It's definitely Grand Theft Auto. I had a, I had a, I had a dream that something is coming. Dude, I've had dreams too. Tell me about your dream. I had an earthquake dream, a big, big earthquake dream and I thought, what if a big one is coming? You an earthquake. I know. not my friend. But I did dream about the other one before it came too. Yeah. I think a big one is on its way.

We haven't had one in a long time. I have dreams of earthquake, but not the earthquake, but it's a comedian. Yeah, me too. Shake in the room. It's coming. He's just in my room. What are you doing here? We're earthquake?

90. What's up a chance of an earthquake coming. It's coming. It's coming. Yeah. And this one's going to be big. The California one? It says 6.7 or larger.

Yeah. Why are you laughing, dude? You're a naysayer. I'm just saying. You're the real. is why we have these hot nights. I just don't want Andrew to look to go to the bathroom. Wait, go back. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Don't go to the bathroom when they're doing the earthquake. Scouts on. Yeah, scouts on her. Look what it's called. Yeah, what's it called? San Andreas.

Fault. And this is your fault, San Andreas. Yeah. This is why we're in trouble because of you. I saw that. I saw it in theaters. Do you saw that? You saw that? Big rock fan. Not the audacity. Yeah. I saw it too, I think. The rock is the man. He is a man. I'm going to watch. whatever he wants. He says watch this movie I go see it. I love disaster movies but we've talked about them. Moana? You think I'm not seeing you're going to watch Moana before fucking the Odyssey? I'll do a double feature.

No, no, no. You're not going to, no, watch the Odyssey. If you watch Moana before the Odyssey, I'm going to lose my fucking mind in. I will lose it. I will lose it. First of all, you have to apply for a new visa to get to Hawaii. You have to watch, have watched Moana before you go to Hawaii. You know that. They ask you questions about Moana. I never even saw the cartoon version of it. You're in deep

shit, pal. Because you've got to know. And Lilo and Stitch used to count. It doesn't You got to see Moana now. Wow. Before you get to any of the islands, they need to know, do you know plot lines for Moana? Characters, that's what they ask at the border now.

Okay, name me a character in Moana. Mogaso. There is no Mocazzo, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait, wait, turn that off for a first minute. Name me the different variety of characters in Moana. Okay, Paluts. Paluts.

Patongo. Yeah, yeah. Mawana. He's a parakeet. Mogaso. Yeah, Magasso is definitely a turtle. There's a chalk and coconut. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Anook. Yeah. What's the song with the talking coconut? Every day on the island. No, yeah. You know it again. Yeah.

Every day on the island. I'm a coconut. Yeah. Yeah, that's it. Famous Moana. It's a Moana. And it's great. There's so many of them.

There's so many. In the chorus. I'm a coconut. Yeah. It's amazing. Love that song. Yeah. So that's good.

What's the story of Moana? Well, they, but. Well, do you want? Yeah. I want to know the deal. I never saw it. You should see it. Yeah, yeah. Tell me the story. You got to see it. Quince. Oh, my God. The one thing I love about summer is how easy everything feels. The days are a little bit more relaxed and I find myself reaching for the same comfortable go anywhere pieces again and again. And I get it from Quince. I'll tell you that. That's why I keep coming on back to Quince. They focus on well made. This is so soft. It's unbelievable. It really is.

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That's Quo, QUO dot com slash bad friends. Well, Anuk and Mokano, they're being pushed off of the island. The island's being gentrified. Oh. That's the whole story. My skims. Heavy skimms. It's all skimms.

Skims and Howley's. Yeah. And Moana has to kind of save the day, so to speak, along with her new band of friends with the frog and the turtle. The frog and turtle. By the way, that's a great movie. That's probably what it is about. We're going to go see it.

It's not about that. Yes, it is. Gentrification. That's what they're talking about in Moana. Okay. Disney Adventure about a brave village chief's daughter, a magical ocean, and a stolen goddess heart, and also gentrification.

She lives on a peaceful Polynesian island called Motuni. How do you feel about gentrification? More, more, more, more. Yeah. We got to get more, dude. How do you think Carlos is able to live where he lives? Yeah. Near the east side, that was not.

He did not belong. It's so unbelievable when I first moved to Silver Lake Echo Park in the 90s and what it is now. Well, yeah. Dude, in the 90s, it was like, pop, blah, blah, like you would hear gunshots. Not anymore. People screaming. And I'm from the suburb. I'd just be in my blankets.

So scared. Like that scene in big when they chat, when the St. James Hotel. Yeah. They hear people screaming outside. Now they have duck boats. They got duck boats in the water now down there, right? Yeah, wow. They cleaned up

There's an air one there now TV shows are based out of their now Yeah Well it's cool now Before it was like hey pooto What you're looking at bro Yeah you get beat up on the way Yeah yeah yeah and I'll go

I'm sorry Yeah you get jumped I looked at you But I was a survivor I was not scared of the MS-13 Well I'm not I wouldn't say that

I could tell you why MS-13 if you're looking in the camera I'm scared of you For the record I'm scared of Yeah yeah I'm on your side I'm scared but I'm safe Oh don't do handsig

Yeah I am Yeah That's it. Now you're gone. Yeah, what side? They buy tickets to watch. They're cool. I'll do jobs for you. Yeah, we're from, yeah. Hey.

Because they know that I'm not a, I'm not a threat. You're not an oppressor. No, it's not about oppressing. Yeah. What are you talking about? Well, he's an oppressor. Yeah, you're an oppressor. They would shoot you the fuck up.

You go to the neighborhood. They go, this is. Yeah, but for me, I was like a little guy. And as soon as you... But as soon as you get hair, they're not going to trust you. Yeah. No, I'll slick it back. Before they thought you were a scientist or something.

You're like an engineer dog. Like a myth scientist. What so, Doug? Do you do math and shit? No, I let the Mexicans tie their or lock their bike next to my door. I hook everyone. Their bike. Whose bike was it?

It's the guy. That's the 90s. Send me the cock, coconut song again. I'm a coconut on the island. It's such a, I love that. Moana forever, man. You're a liar, dude. I'm going to watch Moana before I watch Odyssey.

If you do, my heart will break. Here's two things I know that's going, okay? No Hawaii, you're not going, right? And also, you're not going to watch the audience. I'm going to FaceTime you from Moana just to bum you out. That'd be, what if I go to Hawaii, but I don't go to your island? If I go to a different island, does that count? No, because you're going to do the show with me on the 16th, on the 15th.

What night it did? You have to do a guest spot. You have to do a guest spot. I will do. I will do. You're not going, are you? I'm going. Everyone listening.

If you're in Hawaii, I'm doing a show. What's it called? Bobby Lee Live. Bobby Lee Live, but what's the, where's the, it was the venue? Let me just go to your website. Yeah, go to my website. This will already be out, by the way. I don't know.

September 12th. No, September 12th. Will it be out of this one? 100%. Yeah, so. No, it won't be. Yeah, go watch me at the Lawsdale Concert Hall. That's a great ad.

You're leaving early. He's not even going to be there. Yeah, the 16th is pushing it. So, I mean, I'll just have to extend my stay. Yeah. If we all go for the 16th. 16th, I'll just say. Yeah, we have to go.

We have to go. By the way, McCone's been ducking. For people that want to know, McCone's in London, he just bailed again on this show. He's got to be fired. I'm down. I already said it. And then you with your dog sick? I've missed one episode in two years.

Dog sick. Dog sick is valid? But is he sick? Yeah. Interesting. You have paperwork? Yeah, yeah. You have paperwork.

And have video evidence. If you have a doctor's note, then I'll. Send me a photo of Mitch McConnell, too. All right. If you're going to do it, due diligence. You know? Yeah. I'm just getting your receipt.

Oh, okay. Dude, he's a vet. It's a vet. It better not be grooming. Oh, here it is. Yeah, what is it? It's not grooming. Invoice.

Invoice. Zoom in. Zoom in. Zoom in. He's getting a haircut. My, I don't groom my. You got a Mohawk? You take your dog to Mohawk Allen?

That's what it's called. Yeah. So that's where I went with my ex. So I didn't know where else to go. It's bullshit, dude. Just be honest. You don't want to come that day. That's crazy.

I've never. Andrew knows I wouldn't fucking do that. He would never do that, but did something else come up? That's something else came up. Something else came up. It's a woman? No. It's a lady friend.

Involved with some sort of pill. Lady pill. Lady pill, dude. Oh, what's funny is those two things did happen, but days later. Oh. Okay. Maybe your memory's serving you wrong. Perhaps it happened on that day and you think it was two days later.

I would never skip work ever. Okay. I believe you actually. Is Archie okay? Yeah, he's okay now. Thank God. What was going on? He's had a little issue with his anal glands.

He put something up there. Yeah. Sir, what have you been putting in your dog's butt? Do you wipe your dog's butt after he poops? I do, of course, yeah. But they tell you don't do that because then they do have trouble with their anal glands. They're not, you've been doing it wrong with him. They're not supposed to be wiped.

Dogs don't need to be wiped. Don't do that. That's not good. Bobby has put something in my butt too. Yeah, but that was a Kit Kat bar. Kit Kat bars belong up there. That's a fine. It's a TikTok.

Oh, yeah, TikTok. When you break a Kit Kat, you eat the left one and you put the right one in your ass. Okay, fuck. That's very obvious. Everybody knows that. Sometimes almond joy, if you want. If you want to be like tropical a lot. I can't believe you thought I've been lying for two weeks.

Yeah, I think you're a liar. No, he told me the truth. I texted him. I wanted to make sure the dog was okay. I love Archie. I never met him. Have I met Archie? No, you haven't met him.

I've never met Archie. When you look at the dog in the eyes, when it gets back from, when you go to pick them up, man, they hate being there so much. The smell, the smell gives them. It's like us walking into a morgue. You know what I mean? Like, if you walk into, you'd be like, oh, God. It's like this like dense, dead air with like formaldehyde when you walk into a funeral home.

I'm sure dogs smell that. Like my dog, there was a groomer, a mobile groomer in the neighborhood. And she walked near it and then she like looked up at the van and then like slowly backed away. Oh my God. They know. They know something. They fucking know what's up. They know what's up, dude.

Their senses are way up. Yeah. How do you feel about death cap for cutie? It's okay. They're not bad. They're not bad. Yeah, throw me some names. I'll tell you.

I'm going to see them on Sunday. Would you know them? No. Backstage? Bought a ticket. There's no way. Short I got it. I'll show you the ticket.

I literally bought it an hour ago. Wow. Haven't been to the Greek in maybe two years, three years. Good tickets? Like good seats? No. Nosebleeds. Okay.

I just bought tickets. My favorite show at the Greek was this, when the Pixies reunited. This is many, many years ago. And when they came out, this is before I knew Joey Santiago. And I fucking cried like a baby. Pixies are the best. Because you never thought that they would get back together. It's like if the talking heads ever got back together.

Never. They would never. Never. But if they're still alive. I know, but they will never. I know because of. Yeah. Trouble in the high seas.

Yeah. It's always the lead singer of whatever. Like Morris and the Smiths. But get the Smith back together. No chance. Never will. I know, but how great would that be? I know, but that's also a part of it's got to be like.

That's a Coachella headlining fucking show. Oh, no, don't do Coachella. Do like a pro. A private showing? We'll do like the palladium or something with them. Do something more intimate that's their venue. Yeah. Cochella. Okay.

It's just too much. It's too much. Yeah. You imagine if the, imagine if the Smiths went, didn't Coachella and they did with Bieber, they were on their computer talking about old stuff that they used to love? I don't think the kids would resonate with the kids. It would not hit. Yeah.

Not with the kids. I don't even think that the talking heads would resonate with the kids even if they got back together. I don't think they would headline. No, headline no. Now. Not now. Yeah. They're not big enough. I don't know if the kids know. Yeah, I don't think they know. A lot of the kids in the comments are going to say, we absolutely do and we know. They're that good. Like the Smiths, I think could headline. I don't think so. No, man, that's such a hard. That's hard. They got to sell like a huge internet. It's got to be like bad bunny. You know what I mean? It's got to be like some of the crosses every genre of age range and gender and the Smiths would be. Even when the strokes played, they were kind of bummed that Bieber was headlining. Yeah. Well, how can you? It's like, What do you mean? That, but because it's like, that's like you and me getting bummed that, like, Chappelle is at a venue nearby.

You're like, what are you going to do? We're not going to have. Yeah, I'm, here's the thing. For me, I'm okay with people rising. You are. I really am. You've always been supportive. Yeah, it's like when somebody rises, like when the Matt Rife thing happened, I was like,

I'm so happy for him, you know? 100%. Yeah. Here's my problem. Say that again into the mic. You become friends with them real quick. Fuck off. You said that on the show.

It's true, but fuck off. Okay. You know what? I would like to check the tape on these shows and see who's been more combative lately. Lately, it's him for sure. It is to you lately. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a grudge or a gripe or something with you and him lately.

Oh, yeah, yeah. There's a non-caring aspect. And he's gotten quieter. The Spaniard's gotten quieter. You've been quieter, dude. To balance. No. No, you're not.

You're not revealing what's going on in your work. You're Yang, not Ying. Yeah. To be honest, Bobby, you're Yang for sure. I'm Yang. Yeah, yeah. You're Ying. You're yin.

You're more young. Yeah, yeah. What's going on in your world that you're being really quiet lately? Yeah. Why do yank? Why are you, why you've been yin? Yeah. I'm just, don't look at me, look at yang.

Because Bob is so attacked, I'm trying to just shift focus towards you. You should be a politician. You're so good at bullshit. He's so good at like lying his way out of the... Both of you. You're not good at bulls. You're more of a Ken Paxton kind of... Such a specific reference.

Yeah. I mean, he is kind of like corrupt. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You would have deep corruption, but you'd have the support for the man. I would have side girls and travel, yeah. Okay. That's insane.

That's insane. That's insane. Only private jets, though. Yeah. You'd be flying private jets. Paid for by tax dollars. Yeah. It's incredible.

What's going on, Ying? What is going on? I just don't want to attack you anymore. I'm trying to focus on Andrew. Rip into me, dude. I deserve it. More difficult to do. Rip into me right now.

Rip into me. I deserve it. I don't think you do. Okay. But I'm curious to know why something. something's bubbling with Andresi lately. We're going to find out later. Yeah. Yeah. I know what it is. Hmm. I can't, we can't talk about it here. Oh. He's playing the middle. And when you play the middle,

would you play the middle, dude? You right. The middle. There's no allegiance. That's exactly right. Right. He's trying to. Yeah. And it's, yeah. And it's squash. When you are in the middle, no, you're not going to get squash. Because you're playing a middle right to juggernauts. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. And little people. That's right. Yeah. So, you know, where's your allegiance? Be smart. and tactical. With a juggernaut. You got to lean toward the juggernaut. I don't believe you at all.

I don't believe it, yeah. You're so bad. Yeah, you're in the middle. With the little people. Yeah, and that's why we're reacting to you this way. That's exactly right. Don't you think? Yes, we're feeding off of what you.

Yeah, we are. Where is your allegiance? Always. Is your allegiance, dude? Yeah. Because I'm not sure. Yeah. You could jump ship at any moment.

He would. And do you want to show your allegiance to us? I would get a bad friend's tattoo. Oh. In fact, I'm, get one. I think we should and you should all get a bad friend's tattoo, right? See where your allegiance is. No, no nittles. No needles. No needles. Yeah, yeah. Wow. Now let's just get just get a henna one.

Yeah, but the henna's last forever. Would you get one? Yeah, of course. I know you would. The henna's last. Remember Esther got one of those hennas and it lasted? Yeah, I got them too. And it just went away this year and it was seven years ago. Seven years? Yeah, maybe. What was your, what did your say? The state of Texas and then I got the Nike check right here. Oh, I remember the Nike check. It's totally gone? Yeah.

I don't buy it. I don't know where I'm going to get it. On your shoulder. No, no, I've got to get maybe here and a little. What about your other form? The other arm is wide open. Yeah, yeah. But just a little one here.

Just that says bad friends. I'll do that bad friends logo probably. Oh, that one's good. You know what? Whatever's... I'm a coconut from the island. Go see Moana in theaters now. Yeah.

When is there going to be a new rock, though? Who's the next big cool guy? There's got to be a new guy. What are you looking at him for? You think he's a Hollywood reporter or something? Yeah. I'm the guy with the computer. He's got to be a new rock.

There's got to be a new hot big guy. It's that in the black stars. What's his name? Oh. And Jacob Allorty? Yeah, Jacob Allorty. Oh. He's big. Put on some mass.

He just doesn't have the, he doesn't, yeah. Yeah, he's a handsome. Zooz him in on him. The, yeah, really Scott's. He's already a movie. Dude, look at him. He's tall, chiseled. Jacked.

He's dating Kendall Jenner, though. Huh? He's dating Kendall Jenner. They all do. They all do. He's dating Kendall Jenner? Yeah, so it's stalks through the roof. Dude, I want to date a Kardashian.

Rob. Which one's available? Rob. It's too late, right? There's a brother with that small spine syndrome that they've got. Do they really have one? Yeah, they don't show. Maybe that's my case.

Isn't there another sister that isn't on camera? Isn't that true? Isn't there like another one that doesn't... I thought there was a brother that is not on camera. Yeah, maybe there's that. Maybe somebody's not in the family. Yeah. It was kind of like the same thing with the Osbournes, right?

Didn't the Osbournes have another kid that was never on camera? The daughter. She refused, right? Yeah, she's not involved. That's the one I've never met. Because she doesn't want to be in that world. Yeah. Not interesting.

I thought you about my experience with her, the mother. What's her name? Sharon. Sharon Osborne. Well, she said, no one of my favorite. Did I tell you what happened? I was someone who drank my... Dude, I love he blamed the whole house.

I'm backstage, right? Theo's backstage at the main room. He goes, Hey man. I go, what's up? He goes, the Osbournes are here, man. You gotta go say hi. You gotta. So I did my Osborne joke. Right? My I-I-I-I joke. Yeah. Right? And then I go back there

and I shake Jack, I hug Jack. And then I touch Sharon in the shoulder. I'm such a big fan. I don't know why I said that. And she does this. Did you say I'm sorry for your loss?

No, I didn't. Would have been a good lead. I don't know. It's too late. No, I think that one lasts. It happened the week of before that I would say it. I don't think so. How long is that window open?

For Ozzy Osbourne forever. Oh, fuck! He's Ozzy Osbourne. I should have said sorry for your loss. He was a hero of mine. Yeah. But I also say, saying I'm a big fan is still good.

She doesn't care about that. And she went like this, she went. Yeah, that's what you deserved. I'm on her side. Are you being real? I'm on her side. I would have shuddered you up. This could have been a good thing, though.

My husband was a legend. You should have said something. Oh, fuck. Thanks to your husband for shaping my childhood. And because of that reaction, then Theo goes, they're coming backstage. I left back at the back door. Yeah, yeah, because I didn't want another, you know what I mean?

The coward's door. The cowards door. You've gone through the coward door. I do. I do the coward door all the time. When I bomb shit, I'm always going through the coward door. Don't want to say hi to anybody. Yeah.

I love the coward door. It's my favorite exit. So if everyone knows, right, the main room, there's three ways to exit it. Right. Okay. Right. Right. There's through the cover booth.

Mm-hmm. Right? There's through the crowd. Yeah. Right? And there's through the cowards away. The cowards away. Yeah.

And that's where, like, Arsenio Hall goes through. Not because he's a coward. Not because he's a coward. He doesn't want. He doesn't want the thing. The thing. right? I always walk in through the audience. You have to. Right? They go, oh, too, yeah, yeah, yeah, because I like the talk. Yeah, you heard the chatter. I hear people, you know what I mean? And there's some

people that go, did they do a Sharon Austin? They do sharing you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, they're sharing me. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's sharing you. So when you have a good set, right, you walk out through the ground. 100%. Right. When you have a bad set, you go through the either the cover booth or the Cowards Way. And when you have it, and then you have, when you're really uncomfortable, you sneak out through the bar, the bar door, the backside bar door. Can you get out that way? Mm-hmm. I found a way.

You have to climb up the hill, but you get dirty, but you could do it. I've done it. But did you know the new, you know what they're going to do? What? Make a patio out there? No, that's what they're doing. Their next project is through the bar, Nitzie's bar, what's, Ceros. To the main room.

To the main room. That's genius. That needs to happen. That's going to happen. Yeah, because otherwise you can't get back there. Yeah. For people that don't know, that used to be called a video room back when we were young lads. Now they made it a bar for comics.

Yeah, it's beautiful. But COVID shut it down. They couldn't have it back there. And then they reopened it again. Have you seen the new design? It's stunning. It's stunning. Yeah, they did a great job.

Anyway. Is there any way we could turn on the air? Yeah, it's like a sweatshop. It's a sauna in here. Yeah, this is a new big thing in the world. No AC. Dude, my AC kicked out last night and I was like Rutt Row. Rout Rout Roh.

Had the guy come today to have. help fix it. Yeah, I have fans. I have emergency fans stocked. I have fans and AC. I'm still sweat at night. Yeah, I have fans AC and that man with a fucking fan. You have fan man. All right. Dad fan man. Yeah. I could double, yeah. I triple you. It's me. Yeah. Harlos comes over and fans in my face. Yeah. You would. With air conditioning and fans going. It's so hot. Yeah. It's been bad. It's so hot. I know. Yeah. Kind of makes you more. And it's worse in other areas. I get it. Right. But it's like, I don't like it. It's way worse. It's like 120. Phoenix right now. Oh, yeah, I tell my mom every night, I go, don't go outside. Don't leave the house.

She's in the desert. Yeah. Why are you laughing? My mom could have a heat stroke. Death Valley's at 134 right now. Dude, imagine. I didn't know what that is. Shaka. Shaka. Shaka. Yeah. Luke Desert in Iran and Kuwait in the Middle East reach, which, reach what? 115. What it? No, no, no. Luke Desert gets up to 159. How's that even real? Nothing's there. Yeah, not. Nothing's there. Hot desert. Oh my God. In Iran.

They have war missiles and hot. Wow. We would kill them with hot. Kill them with hot. And they still win. They're still winning. Yeah. We'll shift it.

Nope. I'm still on Team USA. Not me. I'm reading Iranian books right now. Trying to learn, man. I'm trying to learn. China's helping them. It's crazy.

Yeah. Yeah. 100%. Yeah. It's getting bad. And what are we going to do about it? Nothing. Nothing.

Nothing. I'll vote. No. Yes, I'll vote. You won't vote, though. What? You don't vote, though. Yeah, but I contribute to John Ossov and Teller Rico. Oh, that's right.

That's so funny. He'll give, but he won't vote. Because they're not even my district. They want your, okay. Yeah, that's true. You can't. It doesn't make a difference. They're in my district.

That's my point. We have to balance. Like you're fucking, you think you're the balance? You're not, right? But we have to have a fucking balance. All this. No, you're not. You're yank.

I think all this heat is, I think all this heat is Mom Dani. I think it's his fault. Maybe. Gotta be Mum Dye. I'm not going to go there. I'm going to blame it on Mum Dyer. Socialists.

They cause this heat rise. Yeah, it's because of them that we go up. Listen, I think it's this. I think it's, be a good socialist. Give everyone heat. I don't want any more of this.

It's global warming denialists over the years, these fucking huge companies. And, you know, I mean, now we're at this place where it's like there's no going back. I don't believe in it. I'm going to play devil's advocate.

believe it. Okay. It's not real. All right. Because at some point, right, if there's no way of going back and then what are we going to do? I think we die. That was the plan. Yeah, but what about our children? We don't have kids. That's right. That's right. Acorns. Acorns is a smart way to give your money a chance to grow. Acorns is easy. You can sign up in minutes and start automatically investing your spare money even if all you've got to spare is change. And you know what? As a young man, I wish Acorns was in my life. you to help save some money. I would have saved so much money. I think so. Yeah, I know. I spent too much money when I was a young lad. And Acorns grows with you, whether you're just starting out or thinking about settling down, Acorn supports your big and small goals across every single life stage. No matter

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Yeah. It's not just regular citrus. It's Mountain Dew citrus. Well, it's refreshing Mountain Dew citrus. From the mountains of Tennessee, my friend. And it's got proud American roots. That foothills of Tennessee created a flavor that you know exactly what it is. A couple of brothers, right?

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because it's been tasting great since 48. Enjoy the refreshing citrus kick to Mountain Dew, an American original. Look for Mountain Dew in stores near you. Tasting great since 48. Let me ask you this. I saw a video the other day of, um, a married couple up until the 90s, and then they're both in the hospital. No, the, this isn't, just let me finish. Can I just get it out, right?

The female, you know, dies and the husband dies immediately after, but in the reverse, that doesn't happen. The female lives longer. Why is that? because they're free. I know, but why? Okay, if I had, if I married my girlfriend, right, and she dies,

I'm not going to die immediately after her. You might. I don't think I would. We die statistically before them, and then they live long, healthy. I know, but I think I would be like, hey, I could get on the dating apps. No. Yeah, get on Ryan again. No, God wouldn't let you.

You'd be gone. You'll get in wrinkle by them. What? What'd you say? The dating app Rinkle Yeah So I don't care

Yeah that's a good Yeah I get on that dating app Rinkles is so good Wrinkles is so good I'm on sciatica What And that's so good Wrinkles the app

Now you wouldn't want to go back to the apps If you were ever single You'd never go back to the apps You hated him when you fucking did them I know but I would get on some sort of old Like what's the old people a dating app There's an old people dating app Squatting and smoking

Ryah is that it No no no no there's a old people di-dating up. Oh, plenty of fish. Isn't that it? No, that's for everybody. Our time? Our time. Silver singles. Our time. Go on silver singles right now. I want to see what that looks like. Yeah. That's all silver.

I want to see what the women look like. Qualify now, Bob. What was it? What's it? It says 50. Over 50. Yeah, yeah. Look at the photo. Yeah. Safe, simple, silver singles. Yeah, no way. Boop. I wouldn't get, I, that's a, that's a, boop.

That's their form of sex. That's foreplay. Boop. Yeah. Boop you. Boop a nose boop. That's how they hook up now. Yeah.

Wow. Over. Do you ask them a kissing? Yeah. They're nasty. They're nasty. They're dirty birds. Obviously seeking arrangements is the one you want.

I'd have to know where my dick's at. Well, you know exactly. It should be the same point. No, no. Should be where you left. I know. I know the location of it now. That's what, no.

Just put an air tag on that thing. And you'll know where it is. The condition of where it's at. It's in perfect condition. I know, but when I'm 80 is what I'm saying. Like at 80, will I have sexual desire? Will I want? I mean, I'd have to know.

I'd check in with it. I would assume. I don't think so. I think it dies at 70 for men. Look at it. Look it up. This is what you get, blue, chew gold. It's the best product.

Blue, true silver for him. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Wait, but I'm going to ask you guys all a question. This is a good question. I was taking a piss on the airplane and I looked down on my wiener. Your wiener changes as you get a. older. It looks different looks at it.

You know, like it... Mine looks like a hammerhead right now. Yeah, like that the... The helmet is... The helmet is like much wider. Look at that. Yeah, sexual desire remain active, but it'd be 70 beyond. Have your penises changed in the last like 10 years? Have you noticed a change in the wiener? When I look at mine, it looks a little different. What is yours look like? I told you mine it looks like a hammerhead. Why, sir? My dick looks a little... Yeah. Like when I'm pissing, it goes like this. Oh, God. My back is killing me.

No. Hold my ball. Mine's philosophical. I think therefore I am. That's what my penis says. Size and shape. Yeah, no, not size. It just looks a little different now.

Yeah, the appearance. It has a color change? What are you talking about? A little. It's gray? Blue? Oh, that's not good. Should I untie that thing?

It's not breathing. It's not breathing. Yeah. Is it blue? It's bright blue. That's not good. You got to go to the hospital. All right.

Smurf. What? It's like smurfed it. Papa smurfed it. Wow. The amount of times, too, when I was fire crotch. That was all when I was a kid. Fire crotch.

Yeah. Fire crotch was a big. It is red. Yeah. No, the skin itself is bright white. Yeah. Never seen so. But it's very good.

It's in fine, fine. It's in fine condition. I don't believe it's bright blue right now. No, it's not. But it's just changed a little. Maybe it looked different to the window. Yeah. As I peed in the bathroom.

When you pee on a plane, you don't put the seat up. You just pee. No, I do. I just pee. I do. I just shit everybody. I shit everywhere. Yeah.

You know what I had to do the other day for the first time is hook it. What? I had to hook it. What do you mean? What do you think I mean? Pull it out the side? No, no, no.

I had to stick my finger and hook it. Why? Because it was, I'm tired of like, you know what I mean? My asshole as a clip. You know, it clipping. Don't clip it. Get it all out.

Right? but it clips at the end, right, and I hook it. It's crazy, dude. No, I don't. I'm sorry, I'm hooking it. I'm digging it out. Digger. This is why Hottadell doesn't shake out.

The new Tom Cruise movie. I'm digger. That's digging? Yeah. Tom Cruise's movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm digger. Okay. You don't dig it?

I never, ever. Oh, I dig it. And you know, I googled it. Hot chicks do it. Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah. Are you a hot chick? And you.

Yeah, hot chicks and me do it. They don't, do hot chicks clip. Yeah. Do hot chicks clip and dig. Yeah, yeah. I will say this. I have to admit, I did it like four months ago.

Exactly. Thank you so much. It's not like I clip every time. Why? Were you having trouble? Yeah, me too. I was tired of it. Fiverr.

Yeah, we got to eat more fiber, bud. I eat beans. Do you want to take metamusel? Yeah, I've tried all of that, and it just hardens in there. Nothing like the hood. It's like my poo looked at Medusa. Frozen.

Back to the Iliad. Yeah, yeah. Nolan, do that. Put that in the movie. Yeah, put that in the movie. Yeah. Free, a poof. You've never clipped.

Never touched it. Okay. Not interested in it. But then you wash your hands ferociously. You must. You must and always. But that's why you have shiny nails. Yeah.

Nothing sticks to those. It's like a top coat. Yeah. You're going to stop doing that at some point, yeah? Painting your nails. Why? I'm sick of it. Really?

I don't like it. Why? I don't know why. It's like too shiny. Yeah. Maybe. I think some, are you still doing your toes?

Oh yeah, for sure. Yeah, for sure. Does your girlfriend paint your toes ever? No. She'll never, you'll never let her. We go to a pro.

You gotta go to. Yeah, Armenians. What do you mean? She's been doing her whole life, though. Girls have been painting their nails their whole lives. I don't,

because I have to admit something out loud. Yeah. One of the toes, I have to go to hospital. You have like, you have like gang green on it? No, not gang green,

no. It's just, it's just. Gang yellow? I banged it against, you know what I mean? a bedpost. I've done that a thousand times. Right.

It turned black. The nail fell off. It's gang green. No. And it's not gang green, dude. It's not green. Gang black. It's not green.

Yeah. It's gang black. Yeah. And I had to, now I have a artificial one, a plastic one. That I have to keep super gluing up. You have a fake toe? Yeah. Subnol hematoma.

Collection of blood trapped underneath the toenail caused by trauma. So I got, yeah, I got to go to the hospital and go to my doctor and go, what the fuck is going on here? They're going to go, what's going on? And should have come in four months? ago when it started changing color. You know you might get the toe amputated. I don't care about it.

You don't like the big, it's the big toe. Well I, you know what my doctor said? I already talked about, did I talk about this? What my dentist said? No. About your toe? Yeah, I have ginger vitus down there. What did he say?

My dentist said six months ago, you got to get them all removed. You're every, every tooth. You're gonna get them. veneers? No, I'm going to get dentures first. No. Yeah. I'm going to have fake ones. Let me see. Why? They're all falling out. How many are fake now? There's none fake, but he's like, you got to get them all removed because they're all sick. Oh. So at one point in a year or two, I'm going to be coming in here with like, you know what

gums? Pure gums. Pure gums. What is that? Are you not brushing ever? No, I'm so brushing. Too brushy? No, right now, if I did what I did in my 20s, I would have all my teeth. I floss you know what I mean a little bit of hydrogen peroxide I just brush twice I get into all of it but they're dead

they're dead just cleaning dead bodies he died he's cleaning the dead bodies yeah you gotta let them go it's like that world in the Odyssey remember when

Hades no where Elliot Page comes alive yeah hell hell wait that was in Moana not seen in Moana no you know what

the reason I bought those tickets to the show is because I, you know, like, I like Death Cab. I haven't really been like a hardcore fan, but that's how I go to shows now. It's a last second. I see it. I'll buy it.

Done, fine. I'm in the Greek. I go, yeah, I'm going to go to the Greek. I'll see a band. I haven't seen it in a long time. I seen them live years ago. I like them. I'm going to go see it.

I did the Stardue Valley concert there at the Greek. With the L.A. Philharmonic? No, I don't know what the, but it was beautiful. That's incredible if they played that. And I went backstage to set out to Eric. Oh, that's so cool. Right. And then he did a speech. He mentioned my name on stage. It got kind of applause. Some.

It was like half applause, half nothing. You're a Stardu Valley legend at this point. You've talked about it so much. There's no way they don't. Yeah, but it was a beautiful experience. It wasn't with them, but. It was really beautiful. That's the last time I was at the Greek. The Greek is, the Greek to me is leaps and bounds better than the bowl. Yes. I've never been to the ball. Oh.

Never been to the ball. Bring up the bowl schedule right now. I'm not going to the ball. Please. Because Highland is always trafficked. But the ball does something that is amazing with the movies with the music. It's incredible. With the LA Philharmonic, they play movies live.

I'm not going to the ball ever. Okay, the Firework Special with Tchaikovsky, that's no, no. Give me a good show, I'll go. Zizi Top. No. Counting Crows. No. How to Train Your Jagging in concert?

No. John Mellencamp. No. Santana. Al Green, Al Green. He's still alive? No, it's an AI. Oh.

Top Gun Maverick in concert. Never. What? Yeah. There's nothing there that I'm going to be like, oh, I'll go to the ball. Carlos, would you guys go see Top Gun with me? I'll go. I go every year.

It's so good. Oh, my God. You're so good. Keep going. Smooth summer jazz. That's going to be so good. This is for Vos. Mewis, Portugal, the man.

Go, go. This is for Bobby. Which one? Amadeus. I would maybe do Amadeus. I would do that in concert. Yeah. I would definitely do that.

And the John Williams every year? Yeah, every single year. John Williams every year. He does like three weeks? Three. John Williams, Melanchab? Who is it? John Williams, the composer

I don't love him Bocelly Orville Pack I love Orville Pack I love Orville Pack Okay enough Hold on go down I want to see

There's one that's gonna hit you hard Jose Gonzalez is great Yeah Jose Gonzalez Yeah Sound of music I'd go Yeah and there's a sing along You know all the songs Like Empire the Empire the Sun

The Hills are alive With the sound of mute I'm a coconut On the island I'm a coconut on the island A deer A female dear Ray

drop of golden sun Me a name I call myself Far a long long way to run Wang my friend from the corner store Yeah Demetrius My drug dealer

We should all go together to one of this I do I completely agree Someone would have to pick me up Well you know we know Portugal demand We could go see that show Here's the only way I would do the fucking bowl With me Talking heads, Rearion

They're not there The Smith's reunion. They're not there. I know. I'm just saying these are the only scenarios. Give me more reunions. High school reunion? What if they do that?

What if they do your high school reunion there? Would you go? Yeah. You never went to one high school reunion, did you? No. I was never invited. No, it's not. They sent a thing out to everybody.

I never was invited. Did you ever go, Carlos? No. Have you gone? No. Yeah. I just didn't. It's a far far way to, it's a far far way to run.

Run. I just didn't. I couldn't. See. I don't know. Some people haven't talked to a long time. I don't know, dude. Yeah.

Another drink for fun. Go away out the cowards door. Rush. Oh, Rush is coming back. Creed, triumph from an Alabama shake. The drummer. What's his name? Domer.

Jeffrey Dahmer? No, no, no. The famous drummer. What's his name? John Bonham. Not John Bonham. Oh, from Rush. Yeah.

What's his name? Oh. Legend. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. fucking Neil Pert. Yeah, Neil Pert, he's gone. But now they have a Nika.

It doesn't matter. Neil Pert is gone. It's not the same. It's like, you know what I mean? Kim Diel leaving the pixies. It's not the same. But they got a babe drummer now. She, she, I don't care.

She rips. It's like the Filipino dude or whatever singing for Journey or whatever. I'm not going to do it. It's like, you know, The Grateful Dead. It's like. Love the dead.

I know, but it's like, it's not the same. Of course it's not the exact same, but they're, Wanted the same. Can't be, brother. Please. Those days are gone.

Yeah. You can't go back in that AI Instagram 90s video. It's over. It's all fake. None of it's real. Backstreet boys, we go see them. Yeah, I'm not gonna see any of it. Yeah.

And Eagles are back again at the sphere. Metallica, who I've seen here at SoFi, who's still fucking kill. But look at October to March. They booked so many tickets. Yeah, it's crazy. It's fucking Metallica. Yeah, I just watch it online now.

No, the sphere you've never, I've never, I won't do the sphere. It boggles your fucking mind. It's one of the coolest, live shows I've ever seen in my life. He went to go see. Would you go see? You want to go see the movie?

What movie? When we were in Vegas. Yeah. I'd watch The Odyssey at the Sphere. I bet that'd be incredible. That would be incredible. Insane. It's one of the coolest tech.

Yeah, I would watch, okay, if the Odyssey ever plays the sphere, I'll go. But they don't, they only do like classic movies there now. They're not doing like new. The process to make them like that. It's crazy. Oh, fuck the process. Trust it. Just do it.

I mean, look at how it's, it is a cinematic masterpiece with music. We should do bad friends live there. Oh. We'd sell 90 seats. 90. 100. 100. We'll get 100.

Genuinely. You know how much the tickets go for for these fucking shows? Yeah. They're like $600 for like regular seats. It's a rip off. Yeah. It's chaos. That's a sphere?

That's the sphere, dude. It's a massive screen. Oh my God. I'd love to go. That I'll go because the screen. So cool. I love screens. You're a big screen guy.

Yeah, yeah. Let's see if they'll put Staroo Valley up there for him to play pre-show. Imagine. That'd be so fun. Dude. Imagine playing video games. for his own on that screen. I guarantee you in the future

they're going to have video game competitions in there for sure. It's prime for that. There's Chamleigh on top of it who's promoting Marty Supreme. Wow. What?

He went on top of it to promote the movie last year. This was some executive's idea and then they were like, what does that have to do with anything? They're like, just put them up there. Yeah. Oh, can I tell you something about this?

Yeah. It's just something I wanted to talk. Maybe I'll save it. No, tell me. It's something that I would like to admit right now from my heart. And this is true.

Trueisms, I call. White people. Hi. Are the best. And you finally came around. The dark wizard. I saw it. The dark wizard and it made you respect the whites?

Yeah. Thank you. Neil Potter. Thank you, man. That is his name? Finally getting recognition. Dean Potter. You know what's about, dude?

It's Dean Potter and Alex Honol's war. Well, between the two free solo guy? Well, Dean Potter was, you know, old school. And when Alex Honol came on the scene, there was a competition. I love that. And they were doing extreme shit, dude. And when you guys go in extreme, you go extreme. Yeah.

Yeah, you won't see an Asian up there. No. Black guys? You won't see you a black guy up there. I ain't going up that mother-off? Why are you free-selling? I love it. It's great.

Yeah. When the whites go crazy, we go. You guys go ultimate, and you can understand the wars. See? See? He finally gets it. Forever. I know you guys

It took me a long time to even admit it. But it's worth watching. It's worth watching because any minorities out there. You guys got to get more extreme. No, what? Because when you see these documentaries, right, you'll know to stay away from them. To the whites?

Yes. You're too extreme for me, bud. I don't do that shit. Yeah, you do, dude. Your schedule is extreme. That is true. I'm in Scotland. You know what I mean? It's extreme behavior.

Wait too next month. Yeah. You're going to Australia. You're going down where the whites are. Yeah, and I don't want to go. Yeah, you do. Yeah, you want to go. I don't want to go. I love performing for the fans.

I love seeing the fans. It's just going there. The flight? Yeah. You'll fall asleep. You don't even know what happened. Yeah, I'm sweating right now. I'm sweating my balls.

My balls off. Like everything is like humid in here. It's become unbearable. Unbearable. It's untolerable. It's untolerable. Yeah. And you know what?

Yeah. Thank you, whites. Thank you, whites. Yeah. Thank you, whites for being bad friends. Yeah. Thank you, White. Thank you for being a bad friend.

White's.