Bad Friends - The Slow Clap

Episode Date: April 6, 2026

Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/c/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Kachava, Avocado Green Mattress, Rocket Money, Shopify, BlueChew & Talkspace • Kachava: Go t...o https://kachava.com and use code BADFRIENDS for 15% off your first order. • Avocado Green Mattress: Go to https://AvocadoGreenMattress.com/BADFRIENDS and check out their mattress and bedding sale! • Rocket Money: Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at https://RocketMoney.com/BADFRIENDS • Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/badfriends • BlueChew: Get 10% off your first month of BlueChew Gold with code BADFRIENDS. That’s promo code BADFRIENDS. https://bluechew.com • Talkspace: As a listener of this podcast, you’ll get $80 off of your first month with Talkspace when you go to https://Talkspace.com/badfriends and enter promo code SPACE80. YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Audio Subscribe: https://apple.co/31Jsvr2 Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 The Slow Clap 8:30 Science Experiment & Elements 13:15 Pulp Fiction Under Fire 18:30 Bad Friends Wedding 24:00 The 1 Minute Rule 28:00 Yabba Dabba Doo 31:00 Soft White Underbelly 35:00 Andrew’s Midnight Reels 39:00 No Filters Dating App 46:00 Tumors.com 50:00 Full Metal Jacket 55:30 Midwest vs California 59:00 $5M Nirvana Guitar 1:03:00 Conspiracy Theories 1:08:00 Kicks of Love More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@7EQUIS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This video contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, guys, I believe our Patreon is the best in the business. We do, we release things that we cut out of the show. Yeah, stuff that you can't get on the show, you're going to get on Patreon. And along with the fact that we've always been putting out episodes that are ad-free on Patreon. We're constantly filming. And also, McCone has put together a bunch of the docu series of us tours and on the road. We just released London and Dublin, which combined is two hours and 40 minutes of more bad friends content. So for a full month, you get 70.
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Starting point is 00:00:45 I believe our Patreon is the best in the business. We do. We release things that we cut out of the show. Yeah, stuff that you can't get on the show, you're going to get on Patreon. And along with the fact that we've always been putting out episodes that are ad free on Patreon. We're constantly filming. When we're constantly filming.
Starting point is 00:01:01 And also, McCone has put together a bunch of the docu series of us tours and on the road. We just released London and Dublin, which combined is two hours and 40 minutes of more bad friends content. So for a full month, one full month, you get 70% off. Yeah. For new members. For new members. You're going to get 70, 70% off for new signups to the Patreon. So go to patreon.com slash bad friends and check that out today.
Starting point is 00:01:28 Yep. You two are bad friends. Who are these two idiots? White dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting. Oh, you two or something. We're bad friends. Last night.
Starting point is 00:01:43 I fell in love with you last night. Last night. You look good today. Your hair looks good. You look good. You look smooth. Interesting. Because smooth baby Asian boy.
Starting point is 00:01:55 Baby Asian boy. So we're at... Okay. Go ahead. At the comedy store last night. Yeah, at the comedic story. We were out there selling jokes. Already, dude.
Starting point is 00:02:08 Already, dude. I'm just you from last week. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Already, dude. I'm you from last week. Yeah? I'm you from three years ago, dude. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:02:16 That means... I'm so sorry, dude. What's up? Tell the story. There is no story, dude. What's the story? What's the story, morning, glory? What this?
Starting point is 00:02:27 Nothing, dude. What happened last night? You're a little rude. What did I do? I'm at the comedy store. I'm watching your set. Great set. Terrible set.
Starting point is 00:02:37 It was not a good set. I was meandering through poop last night. Sebastian gave me a great intro. I don't think I brought this guy on stage before. Yeah, he has. A fellow Chicago and ladies and gentlemen, he's got an Italian lesson. He doesn't look Italian.
Starting point is 00:02:56 Yeah. It was such a good intro. He killed harder in an intro than I did on any of my shit jokes. He'd crushed. And I went up there and just... That's all I did. Okay. For 15 minutes.
Starting point is 00:03:09 I'm in the hallway. Fart, crap, poop. Oh, because then that was the reason. And then he's in the hallway. I can see him. I can see just a little dumpling resting in the window of the hallway. And I walk down, and this is what he's doing. This is what he's doing.
Starting point is 00:03:24 Leaning against the wall going... You know what that's Bob? What do you want my reaction to be? Do you know what? Okay. Okay. Okay. What would you want?
Starting point is 00:03:38 I ate shit on stage. I didn't know. Then you're leaning against the wall going. Yeah. Okay. I didn't know. Imagine the level. Imagine the level of condescension with.
Starting point is 00:03:53 Okay. So what would anybody's reaction be? All right. Okay. Okay, so I didn't know. Let's backtrack a little bit. I didn't see your set. Okay, okay.
Starting point is 00:04:02 I didn't see your set. Stonefaced. I didn't see your set. I showed up, right? I'm in the hallway. I'm watching him, right? Toward the end, right? So I have no idea what he did, what the crowd is like or whatnot.
Starting point is 00:04:14 I hadn't even gotten into the room. Okay. See, he walks out and just as a joke, I go, right? He walks right past me. It says nothing, right? Goes to the kitchen. That's right. Slips out.
Starting point is 00:04:29 back to the valet. Yeah, to the valet. Without acknowledging my presence. And Bobby runs up to me. This is icing on the cake. Everyone's in agreement with me, by the way. But this is icing on the cake. After the condescending clap, then he chases me in the parking lot. And he goes, you're not going to say hi to me? You're not going to say hi to me. And I said, I got to go home. And then he goes, we're business partners. I did say that. We're business. partners. Yes, so we are. We are not business. Oh, we're not business partners. We're not friends. Okay, exactly. We're not friends. We are. I guess not because I would have led with, two things can be true. Say hi to my friend. I guess I'll say hi to my friend. Why couldn't you say hi to your friend?
Starting point is 00:05:16 We're business partners. Why couldn't you say hi to my? Like it's a law firm. Okay, it's Santino and Lee, not Lee and Zantino. Law firm. The boss is here. The boss is here. You're the boss, dude. Okay. That was your. intern, you move me up as I'm the only boss, I'm the only boss that gets paid the same as his employee I'm the only boss on earth where the employee
Starting point is 00:05:39 is matched to the CEO. Anyway, I grabbed your wrist. You did, I didn't. Because you were trying, no, because you were trying to leave. I was trying to get in my car and go home. I know, I'm going to, because you're not going to, I'll tell you what's not going to happen here, bud. Okay, what's not going to happen to here, bud, is us being in an environment where you're just
Starting point is 00:05:57 going to not acknowledge my presence. That's what's not going to happen. See, this fame is going to his head. I told you, Andres, when I called you last night, I said, I think he's getting too famous. Oh my God, dude. Is he gaslighting me, dude? What?
Starting point is 00:06:11 You're getting too famous. A lot of people have been telling us... Okay, so... Grabbing a friend's wrist is generally considered crossing a physical boundary, particularly if it's done without consent, forcefully, or to your boss. Particularly to your boss. Okay.
Starting point is 00:06:26 Boss man, I'm sorry, I grabbed a wrist. I had a bad couple of sets. I did not know that information I'm running through new shit all this week some nights are good some nights are tough but I'm trudging through the mud and then the clap in the hallway it was like a Seinfeld episode
Starting point is 00:06:42 he did the clap he did the clap he did the clap I did not know so now I have further context of the situation and you had every right to not say hi to I love you thank you you good to see you but I'm going to grab your wrist from now on I mean you're going to get hurt if you do that you're going to a slow clap is widely
Starting point is 00:06:59 consider a condescending sarcastic or ironic gesture. Everyone in the world, in Africa. They know. Yeah, they know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They know. Yeah, okay. So it was condescending.
Starting point is 00:07:14 A guy has a cricket stick. What's going on here? What's the conduct? He missed. He has a cricket stick, yes. He missed. Okay, he missed and slow clap. Okay, good.
Starting point is 00:07:22 So, they play cricket in Africa? All over the world. Okay, good. Cricket is a universal sport. Thank you so much, right? I want to be. No, I just had a terrible. I did not know that.
Starting point is 00:07:30 I was slumming in the bums. Yeah, yeah. It was bumming in the slums. Yeah, so I grabbed your wrist. I said, you know, say hi. And I understand why you reacted the way you did and I apologize. Thank you. I love you.
Starting point is 00:07:40 Yeah, I love you too. And I'm sorry for ignoring you in the hallway, but the slow clap got me good. All the way home. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No music. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And all I can hear it. Looping through my head.
Starting point is 00:07:54 Okay, okay. In yin, yin, yin, yeah. Going through the can. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, can I just threw another. in there then.
Starting point is 00:08:00 Give me no. If I may, yeah. Please. I killed. But anyway, let's move on. Okay. I had a really good set. I know you did.
Starting point is 00:08:09 No, because I'm doing old shit. Yeah. Yeah. But not for long. Okay, not for long. Because the finally tour is on sale right now. So please go to Bobby Lee. Go to Bobby Lee.
Starting point is 00:08:20 Thank you. Thank you. And please go see my best friend, my business partner, as he refers to it. I would have said friend first. I consider you my friend first One of my closest friends And we do a job together Yeah
Starting point is 00:08:33 But I wouldn't do this if we weren't friends I understand that But we are also business partners We are Yes but I'm you're my friend first I care about you more than this Okay yeah and I would agree with that Because otherwise if we're just two guys doing a show
Starting point is 00:08:46 Who aren't friends Then it's just two bears one cave Keep that in that's true I'm kidding They love each other Gee many crazy They're a chila or whatever. Go bother tequila.
Starting point is 00:09:00 Are we not allowed to make jokes? We can. We can. Is everyone sensitive? Yeah, they're very sensitive. I love that fucking shirt and your hair looks good. You're doing all that. You're touching a lot of the buttons right now.
Starting point is 00:09:11 I'll tell you why, because I quit smoking as well. No, you didn't. Yeah, this is day two. Yeah. Dude, did you really? Yeah, day two. Day two. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:21 And how do you feel? Pretty good. Well, I'll tell you why I did it. And I'm not a scientist, as you know. I don't. I don't know. Some people think. Is it general health and well-being? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:34 Are you coughing at night? No, what happened was I was smoking a cigarette and I had a lugi. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? Yeah. As one does, right? And in my sink, I just went and I just spit in the sink. Inside your house.
Starting point is 00:09:47 In the sink. Right, right, right, right. My sink isn't in my backyard. Were you smoking? Yeah, yeah. No, it's that, what? You have an outdoor sink. You have many outdoor sinks.
Starting point is 00:09:58 I do have odd to say. Okay. Wait a minute. I thought you were smoking in this. No, I was just smoking in the house. I smoked a skater outside. I went inside, right? I did luggy.
Starting point is 00:10:07 Got it. That's fine. Right. And then I just let it sit there. Science. Remember the science? Okay. I'm a scientist.
Starting point is 00:10:14 You're the scientist. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. Yeah. And it dried. It does, yeah. As one does. It should.
Starting point is 00:10:22 Yeah. It's called elements. You know what I mean? I told you he was a scientist. Yeah. This is good. So the elements caused it to dry. Yes?
Starting point is 00:10:32 So elementary elements caused them to dry. Right. So they dried. They call it air. Air. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Learning. You're learning.
Starting point is 00:10:42 You're learning. You're learning. So the luggy dried in the sake. Right. And then. You want to know about geopolitics too? I'm really. Not interesting.
Starting point is 00:10:47 Okay, okay. Anyway, and it will, it look like, it looked like tar. Yes. after it dried. Because of, yes. Because of the smoking. Right. Right.
Starting point is 00:11:00 And then because Remy had died, right? Death was on my mind. Right? And I made the connection between the tar lugi that dried through elements, through air and whatnot. Okay. Yeah. And the death of my dog made me go. I'm done.
Starting point is 00:11:18 That's good. Yeah, yeah. So I'm a little anxious. I told the bullies before. I don't know if I could do this today. I have, you know, very filled with anxiety and, you know, I don't know much, I don't know what I'm going to talk about, but, you know, but we're here. Well, you're cold turkey. Why don't you just supplement it? I'm like sweating.
Starting point is 00:11:35 Why don't you do just smaller doses of nicotine to get you off in general? Oh, you're still doing it. Yeah. Yeah, I'm doing it. I know. Of course you're doing it. Yeah, I am. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I mean, I'm not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got it.
Starting point is 00:11:45 Yeah, but it's, um, yeah, there's a lot of anxiety here. But it's okay. But you have to stop. Not to be dark. Because you've also mentioned a lot. You're still smoking, you're still smoking. Yes. You've got to stop smoking.
Starting point is 00:11:58 I have said it a lot. Do you know why you said that? Not because we're business partners. Because we're friends. Yeah. I do care about the business of it all. No. No, no.
Starting point is 00:12:09 I do care about you a lot, tremendously. And if I'm being honest, and I know this is not going to be a funny part of the show, but I don't care. Yeah, yeah. My biological father is perpetually sick because he smoked for like 45 years. I mean, he's got.
Starting point is 00:12:23 Did he quit? He did, dude. When? It got to be 15, 20 years ago. Well, I quit. I'll keep smoking then. I'm fucked. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:12:34 The consequences are already in play. No, you can lessen how bad it is because your body is, your lungs are incredible. They clear out very quickly. Oh. But if you smoke up into your like 60s, you're in deep shit. Oh, right. You're in deep shit. So if you quit now, the lungs are amazing.
Starting point is 00:12:48 They clean out at such a rapid rate. But Keith Richards has always been in my bar. Yeah. You know what I mean? Because, you know, there's a legendary story where you smoke like two packs of Marlboro Red today. Bring him a photo of Keith Richards today. Yeah. Without makeup.
Starting point is 00:13:00 Yeah. Without his makeup and hair done. Yeah. Yeah. Go to the first photo. Yeah. There you go. That's what you want to look like.
Starting point is 00:13:07 He's 42. Yeah. Him and I are the same age. But my point, though, but he's alive, though. He's barely alive. I know. But in my mind, I'm like, oh, Keith. Oh, there it is.
Starting point is 00:13:17 That's what he looks like. That's what he looks like. Yeah. That's what he looks like. On the left. the way, yes, he is alive, Bobby. He's an A, an anomaly. And B, and B, if you know nothing about this show, once we speak of this on this show, he will be dead soon. Everyone we talk about on this show. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. Someone sent me a clip. I guess Eric Dane passed
Starting point is 00:13:38 away. Yeah. And we talked about him two weeks before. I know. I didn't even want to, yeah, I said it. It was just in conversation and we were like Eric Dane. We got to stop talking about celebrities, they're all going to be dead. Can we talk about celebrities we want to die? Diddy? Wait, we did a whole episode on Diddy? He didn't die. Yeah, he didn't die. So it doesn't work. Yeah, it doesn't work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know who I saw had some celebrity beef this week that was wild. Yeah. Was Arquette and Tarantino. Did you see this? Oh, yeah. She's, this is what's interesting about Hollywood. Now they're attacking each other because she was in Pulp Fiction and then she didn't like. Jackie Brown.
Starting point is 00:14:16 No, wasn't she in Pulp Fiction? She was. She's mad about the N-word scene at the end. Wait, what, Arquette? Rosanna-R-Gette. Oh, it was a Rosanna-Arquette. She's in Pulp Fiction. Oh, yeah, yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:14:29 She is in Pulp Fiction. And she doesn't like that he used the N-word in the scene at the house with the guys. And she did like a whole thing about it. And then Tarantino went off online. It was fucking nuts. He was like, you didn't seem to, he's, uh... Well, this is just what she said. You take 12 years of slave, which supposedly made by an amateur.
Starting point is 00:14:46 Steve McQueen is very different than Quinton. Artur. Wow. When you have a, yeah, she's just going on about him using the N-word and saying it's like, you know, cheap and hack and gross and whatever. And then he popped off. And he was like, you had no problem taking the job from me. Oh, so at the time, though, when that, when that movie was. It was fun to say.
Starting point is 00:15:05 No. No, no, no. No, that's not what I'm saying. No, I know. Yeah, it seemed, it seemed. I think if Samuel Jackson wasn't in the scene, it would be weird. I think there needs to be like, you know what, Sam's fine with it.
Starting point is 00:15:19 There's two ways to look at it. Okay. That's his quote. He said, I hope the publicity you're getting from 132 different media outlets, writing your name and printing your picture was worth disrespecting me and a film. I remember quite clearly you were thrilled to be a part of. The writer-director wrote in his statement addressed directly to Arquette. Wow.
Starting point is 00:15:35 Here's what's interesting. Two ways to look at this. And let's get some honest perspective from the booth as well then. Yeah. Especially from filmmaker over there. Yeah, yeah. If it calls for the character in almost anything that we've ever made in the world of art and film, if we're going to believe that this is the world in a vacuum,
Starting point is 00:15:51 if it calls for the character to use certain language, it lines up. When Leo went off, right, it was disgusting, but that was the character. You mean in Django, unchained? Yeah. No. In what? Leo. In Titanic.
Starting point is 00:16:06 When he yells at N-word. Oh, yeah, I remember, man. Right when he browned, he says it. Yeah. You got to turn it up, but he says, the end word, right? What he's like, goodbye, Rose. Yeah. And then says, he says, I remember that. Yeah. Yeah. No, dude, in Django, he says it's very appropriate for the character. It's atrocious to hear. But what when Tarantino was doing was showing how vitrile and disgusting these people were. It was brilliant. It made you loathe, a guy that we love. It was perfect. Right. The argument that many people have made is this man. it didn't really fit the character. It was very odd. It was almost inserted in a way where you go,
Starting point is 00:16:50 this guy lives in the valley, as we know, he's got a wife. He's friends with these guys, so he's obviously a little bit of up to no gooder. Yeah. But it doesn't see, it is true that it doesn't quite fit the character. Yeah, because Leo in Django is a plantation, you know what I mean? He's a slave owner.
Starting point is 00:17:12 Yeah, slave owner. Yeah, he would say. it. But a guy that lives in Sherman Oaks. Also, right? A guy with Sherman Oaks, right? Who has a... Does he have a black wife? Yeah, Bonnie's black. Yes. Yeah, Bonnie's black. Right? So maybe that... Bill Burr? I don't know. I don't know. That's an interesting... Can Bill Burr say it?
Starting point is 00:17:30 I'm... How about this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I bet you he doesn't. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I bet he doesn't. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I understand the argument where you're like, I get... If things are called contextually for a character. Yeah. Yes. Yes. But that character wasn't really that. Right, right, right, right.
Starting point is 00:17:50 So look, does she need to talk about it publicly? No. Yeah. But also we've all thought it. We've all been like, ooh, that was weird. When he said it, you were like, whoa. Yeah, yeah. Because I have that sign outside of my house.
Starting point is 00:18:03 Yeah. Like last night. That fits me. Yeah. But last night I saw Chappelle Lacey at swingers, right? He is always at swingers. He's always there. He lives there.
Starting point is 00:18:12 He lives there. He lives there. there, right? And he gets that chicken sandwich. Careful. No, I mean, it's not fried. Okay. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's not fried. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:22 He gets that, like, you know, grilled chicken. He gets the exact same one every night. Yeah, the same sound. He loves that sandwich. Every night. But it's as if, you know what I mean, I said it to him last night. Why? No, what I'm saying is that in, it. Why did you say it?
Starting point is 00:18:36 I didn't say it. I didn't say it. What I'm saying is, is that how casually he says it in, you know, in the movie, Right. It's like even if you're with your black friend, you wouldn't casually say that. No, you wouldn't. No, you wouldn't.
Starting point is 00:18:49 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know where you would say it? You want to say it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, you want to say it, but you wouldn't casually do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know where you, you know, you know,
Starting point is 00:18:58 you know when you say it in front of your black friend? When? Never. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah, you never say it. Yeah, you never say it. I got a fan, like a fan to my fan page.
Starting point is 00:19:09 Is that or the girl that helps the book, uh, the show? Go back, boys, go back. Sorry. Okay. I got an email through the team from like a fan or something. Go further. Back. Okay.
Starting point is 00:19:24 Okay. My dad ran out on my mom and I. Okay. No, I got an email from like a fan page thing or something and it is a request for you and I to perform at a wedding. And now immediately I was like, no, I'm not going to perform at a wedding. I'm not going to perform at a wedding. I'm not going to perform at a wedding. I'm out.
Starting point is 00:19:45 But how about this? I'm out. It's the royal family. Okay. I'm in. Yeah. No, but as... But Prince Andrew has to be there.
Starting point is 00:19:54 It is. It's his wedding. It's his wedding. It's his wedding. Okay. It is very weird. They want us to perform at a wedding. Clearly, I'm like, no, we're not going to perform at a wedding. But the thought of it was so funny that you want this beautiful special moment.
Starting point is 00:20:05 I was just in my car laughing. Like, you want this beautiful special moment of you marrying your wife. And Bobby and I, doing bits you want us to do bits at the happiest moment of your life you want Bobby and I to do a Bobby Lama
Starting point is 00:20:21 to your uncle yeah yeah there's just no way no never but it did make me laugh because they did it is where we get okay we get people to say can when I propose to my wife at your show yeah we did that all the time we let them vote yeah but we've never been asked
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Starting point is 00:24:46 slash bad friends. That's RocketMoney.com slash bad friends. Let me ask you this. Last night, so you went up. Hmm. Then Allie went up. No, Ali went up after you. Yeah, I brought up. Allie brought me up. Correct. Right. And she brought me up. Great intro. Right.
Starting point is 00:25:07 Right. And, you know, you tell a joke, you know, when the guy, previous person, right? She took it well, but some people don't. How do you think about that? What I did was, ladies and gentlemen, Margaret Chow. Funny. Simple. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:21 A simple, right? She turned around, did a smirk. Yeah, like, right? And she took it well, right? Yeah. Then went to the lot and slash your tires. Yeah, but I've given people, you know what I mean, that. and they haven't talked to me for years.
Starting point is 00:25:36 Well, it depends on the relationship. No, I've had great relationships with comics where I said something, like, I'm not afraid to say it, but do it, you know what I mean? It wasn't even bad. It was Argus Hamilton. Respect to legend. Legend, right?
Starting point is 00:25:53 Great hair today. Something like, it wasn't anything. Right. Right? You know what I mean? Two years later, it was like, I have a resentment toward you. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:26:03 My hair look good. that night. I was like two years? He was feeling it. Yeah, yeah. He was probably... I mean, do you say,
Starting point is 00:26:12 I mean, do you do a little slam slam? Uh-uh. You don't. Here's why, unless it's you, if it's a... Oh, you say crazy thing. Well, but you're a friend. I can't...
Starting point is 00:26:20 You know what? If it's a certain people, I'll do it. But pretty rarely. Yeah. Like, because Marin and I went back and forth for a little while because that fuckhead. He'd give me an intro every time. He'd be like,
Starting point is 00:26:29 I try to be friends of this guy. We went hiking once. He never wants to hike with me again. I don't know if we'll probably never be friends. Andrew Santino. That's still pretty good. And I'm like, thanks for the fucking... But that's still pretty good because it shows relationship.
Starting point is 00:26:39 I know, but it's not even like a you're going to like this guy. It's like, here he is. Yeah. You got, I pump it up. You got Spade. Huh? You got Spade the other night. What did I say about Spade?
Starting point is 00:26:49 Oh, yeah. What did you say? What did you say? What did you say? What did you say? What did you say? He needs it. He needs it.
Starting point is 00:27:00 That's see? It crushed. It crushed. But David loves that kind of stuff. He does. He's great about stuff like that. There are certain people that enjoy it because they kind of think it's fun. He also, if you saw from, he was holding me from going on stage.
Starting point is 00:27:12 All right. You do. That's a good fun bit. He stops me from getting on stage. And he pretends he needs to like talk to me or something. Yeah, yeah. And he's just making you wait longer. And the host is going.
Starting point is 00:27:21 Yeah, yeah. Get to the stage. And I don't know if it's for them or the host suffering. It's both. Yeah, yeah. I think you're having two people suffer. Yeah, yeah. Because the host is always a newer comic.
Starting point is 00:27:31 And they don't know what to do. That's what I like. They keep going. Yeah, yeah. And then sometimes they'll look at the curtain. See if anyone's back there, right? They get really nervous. Yeah, they do.
Starting point is 00:27:42 I do a one-minute rule with Ramsey Badawi. I go one minute. What does that mean? He doesn't get to get a goal on stage for a minute after his name is announced. One minute? One-minute rule. Oh, my God. It's the best.
Starting point is 00:27:55 Does he tank? That's the... Yes. It's a challenge. To dig out of that hole? Yeah, yeah, you got to learn. You throw him in the well. Yeah, you got to throw him in the wild, dude.
Starting point is 00:28:05 Go get out. Yeah, Buffalo Bill style, dude. Put the lotion back. Yeah, the nails have to be in the wall. All right. So what I do is I'll grab the wrist. I apologize. I know, I realized when we Google that,
Starting point is 00:28:16 the wrist grabbing is bad, and I won't do it again, right? But when I didn't know that, right, I would grab his wrist. I would close the green room door. Yeah. And I would look right in a minute. And he could, come on, Bob.
Starting point is 00:28:27 Right. They're already clapping, bro. Yeah, they're waiting. Yeah. And, right. How much more? I go, 44, have five more seconds. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:28:34 It's great. It's so uncomfortable. Yeah, and then I'll gradually open their door. He'll run out there, right? But sometimes he kills with it. Because he uses it. Because he tells the truth. Bobby locked me in the room for a minute.
Starting point is 00:28:45 Right? Yeah, he'll figure out away. And that's going to crush. Yeah, because they used to do that to me when I was opening for people. Who did that? So I used to, I don't know, but I've told this before. I mean, I've told this before. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:56 Mancia did it. Did you know remember why, though? No. Yeah, yeah. So I used to have this bit where I would do my hair like this. Yeah. Right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:08 And I would go up on stage, right? And I would, and just the look would be funny. Right. Right. So people would just laugh and I would have like a, I just start the audience like that, right? For like 30 seconds, I go, I'm not really Asian. I just woke up. That's a great bit.
Starting point is 00:29:26 Dude. I bit Crush. Yeah. Back in the late 90s? Oh, my God. Crush film. Bring that back. Bring back that back.
Starting point is 00:29:33 That's so good. And then we know what Mencia said one night? What? He threw up me a hat because you're not doing that bit again. Why? It's a crutch. It's a funny joke. I know, but he threw me a hat.
Starting point is 00:29:46 Because did you do it to open every show? Every show. Well, that's okay. Yeah, every show I would use it, right? And he thought that it was not helping me. Right? And so he gave me a hat. I would have to wear a hat and not do that bit.
Starting point is 00:29:57 Okay. Well, I get what he's doing. No, but he's trying to, it's about teaching. Yes, you're coaching. Yeah, yeah. Because you got to know, you got to know, it's good, but you got to grow. Yeah. And that anxiety, I don't know what I'm teaching with the one minute.
Starting point is 00:30:10 I know that there's a lesson there somewhere. I know there's a lesson there somewhere. I just don't know what it is yet. I don't know what it. It doesn't matter. Maybe he needs to find out what the lesson is. Maybe that's on the student, not the teacher. The teacher doesn't need to know.
Starting point is 00:30:23 The teacher doesn't know. The student must have figured. They figure out the rule, right? Here's another thing I used to do. All right. You have to say yababababoo. Yabababab do five times in your set. And you can't tell the audience why.
Starting point is 00:30:38 Oh my God. It's a great one. Just in the middle of it, be like, well, you know, yeah, da-dab-da-da-da-do. Yeah, yeah. And you use it as a filler. So if you go, and my mom and dad, they're moving and yab-dab-doo. Yeah. So then, yeah, yeah, you have to throw it in.
Starting point is 00:30:51 Yeah, because they used to be at those like hamburger. Hamburger. You know the comic hamburger? Oh, hamburger. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They used to do that between Joe. That was their hook line. Back in the 80s or 90s, they used to have hook lines.
Starting point is 00:31:08 Like, you know what I mean? Like, chicken fried steak. You know what I mean? Just in the middle of nowhere. And the whole audience would chant it, Chicken fry steak, right? So that's what I'm teaching. Right.
Starting point is 00:31:19 Yeah, I mean, maybe yabodaboo is the thing. But chicken fry steak is also great. Yeah, that is a great line. There's another thing I used to do, right? You have to hopscotch one time from one end of the stage to the other and not tell the audience why. While you're in the middle of set? No, in between jokes.
Starting point is 00:31:34 So, they do a punch and then they have to across the stage. And I'm in, no one's laughing, but I'm in the back of the room. You're laughing. Oh my God. Dude. Oh my God. I'm just cackling.
Starting point is 00:31:47 That's so fun. That's for you. That's for you. It's only for me. Because I've never, I don't, I got, I'm a boring headliner. I'm like, get out there and have fun. No, you got to do challenges. I can't, I just, I'm, I'm scared of making them uncomfortable.
Starting point is 00:31:59 I'm nervous at, they're going to be like. I think this is back in the day. You know what I mean? Yeah, not now. I don't think. Yeah, you fuck with Ramsey now. Only Ramsey now.
Starting point is 00:32:06 But I'll tell you why Ramsey. I've, he owes me his life. Why? I've given him everything. You've given him a lot of opportunity. Yeah, I give him a lot of opportunity. We're very close.
Starting point is 00:32:16 I talked to him last night. We're good friends. You do love him. Yeah. So he's not just an opener. He's now turned into a friend. So I feel like we can fuck with each other. He fucks with me as well.
Starting point is 00:32:24 Well, you know what's next. You might as well be business partners with him. Maybe one day. I watched soft white underbelly. Yeah, I love them. Those are, I cannot stop watching. Yeah. Some of them are hot, the homeless girls.
Starting point is 00:32:36 So many of them. Oh my God, I got, so many. You can live at my house for free. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know what, the soft white underbelly? Yeah, yeah. You know what's crazy about this? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:45 He'll go back, like, he'll go back like eight, nine months later. Yeah, yeah, yeah. See what they're doing. And they're doing the same thing. Same thing. Yeah, like this girl. Beautiful. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:55 Beautiful. All she needs to get on is like, you know, Accatane. She just needs to get on. Akatine. Look at her face. No, buddy, that's a tattoo. Oh, that is.
Starting point is 00:33:02 Oh, fuck. It is crazy. Yeah, yeah. Oh, man. That's a good one. Wait a minute. Is that a bruise? No, she's half panda.
Starting point is 00:33:14 It's one of those new hybrids. Yeah. Wow. Like this girl. Like, for instance, if she, okay, the last girl that you had. This girl's gorgeous. Gorgeous, right? You're single, right?
Starting point is 00:33:26 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 100%. I mean. If this girl said to me, hey, I'm, I'm in the throes of addiction. I live on the streets. I'm sharing needles with strangers.
Starting point is 00:33:34 Yeah. I'm sleeping with people for money. Yeah. What do you think? I go, come on in. But then your TV is missing. So what? Oh, yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:33:41 Get a new TV. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Get a new TV. Right. She robs all my friends. And then, like, late at night, she's in the bathroom. You hear scratching sounds for some reason. Like, what is she doing in there?
Starting point is 00:33:51 Right. We should note. Yeah. This is very sad. It's very sad. It's very sad. No, what it is is we love the interviews because they're powerful of shit. We get to see the window into this life of addiction that is fucking, it's dark and wild. And it takes
Starting point is 00:34:04 everyone. The point we're making is, yeah, addiction knows no bounds. Yeah. It doesn't matter where you're from, what color you are, how much money you came from. It's everybody. And then these interviews are fucking so powerful. Yeah, the real vulnerable. Yeah. Oh, man. You're like, I can't, how can't, like, sometimes you'll see a kid who's like 20 years old. Yeah. And he's like, I've been home since I was 16. You're like, why? Yeah. I love it's nurture, though. It's not nature. Yeah. It's all nurture. I think most of it's nurture. I think that, you know.
Starting point is 00:34:34 Well, you don't think addiction. I think addiction's nature, right? But if you have, I know, but if you have great parents, right, you can navigate it. I think so, but I think so. I think that without my parents, because I got sober when I was 17, right, my parents threw me in rehab a lot, right? Yeah. And they never stopped caring. They never stopped trying.
Starting point is 00:34:54 Yeah, that's important. I think that's important. But also, if you have a broken home, right, your parents aren't there. They're in their own addiction. Right. You know what I mean? You have no money. I mean, I mean, these things.
Starting point is 00:35:04 It's a layered effect. It's a layered effect. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it gets harder and harder. Yeah. Well, I'm happy that you're sober. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But my point is, it's more...
Starting point is 00:35:13 I know. It's a combination of both. It is. I'm sweating. Yeah, why are you sweating now? Because of the... I know, I know. Withdrawal.
Starting point is 00:35:18 Withdrawal. Okay, so how much it, though? What is the intake of nicotine now? How much? I don't know. This one is... How many pouches a day? Six MGs, probably three.
Starting point is 00:35:28 Three a day? Yeah. That's not that bad. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I guess what do I know? But I feel like that's not that bad. I feel like the average has got to be way higher. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:35 Oh, you'll be proud of me last night. I was laying in bed and I put away my phone because I was thinking about our screen time conversation. And so I put it away and I didn't touch it until made coffee in the morning, walked the dog, dropped a deuce, played with the dog in the backyard. Then when I was finally done with that, made a little snacky breakfast, and then I picked up my phone. You know, I love you and I know we're business partners and friends I think that's a lie. Why?
Starting point is 00:36:01 Because last night you sent me a TikTok video. What time? What time? Let me see what time you took and sent it. Well, I probably, I wasn't in bed yet. Hold on, hold on, hold on. I wasn't in bed yet. Okay, let me just see, let me just see. What time?
Starting point is 00:36:12 Let me see. So there you. What time? Hold on, I gotta go down because I get, oh, there you go, ha, ha, ha. So time was at, so what time did you say? You put your phone down? When I went to bed.
Starting point is 00:36:26 Yeah. What time? 1.30. That's when you put your phone down. 130 or 2 in the morning. No, 12.30 or 1? Maybe that maybe it's closer to 1. Okay.
Starting point is 00:36:34 12.15 you sent it. Okay. Okay. I don't go to bed. I thought it was much later. Right? Because I was like, he's texting me. He's, you know what I'm sending me a fucking instant.
Starting point is 00:36:43 No. I was on the couch with the dog. Can I show him what you sent me? It's one of the funniest. Well, I was on the couch with the dog scrolling through my phone. Yeah, yeah. Because she had to get up early. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:51 And so when I sleep, I sleep in the other room because she's got to get up early. So I'm sitting on my phone playing with the dog. And then I said, I know what I'm going to do. I'm going to brush my teeth and I'm going to lay in bed and just stay on my phone. But I didn't. I left the phone. But that is one of the last texts I sent. Show them the video that you can send it.
Starting point is 00:37:06 Text it to Carlos. Okay. Play this video. So here I am sitting on the couch, petting the dog, tick-talking away before I go to bed. And I see this video and I think Bobby's got to see this right away. One two, three, five. This is what he sounds at midnight. But here's what I don't even know what's going on really, to be honest with you.
Starting point is 00:37:45 They don't either. Okay. Yeah, yeah. She's singing a song and having her daughter or sister sing along. Yeah, yeah. I just think the fun. But what's the funny part? You send crazy stuff.
Starting point is 00:37:58 What? Yeah, you send the most wild shit, dude. Guys with no head. Yeah. That's unbelievable. How are they living? I was impressed by her talent. Did she post this?
Starting point is 00:38:11 And if she did, what was the goal? Yeah. So I'm thinking, what am I supposed to feel? Yeah. That's why the internet's beautiful. You interpret it as you may. The second thing I would like to add is that the little one feels like doesn't want to be there. No.
Starting point is 00:38:25 It's forced. It's for clicks. It's forced. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, go to, just zoom in on the girl the whole time. Excuse me, Sabrina. Do you want to do a video? No, no.
Starting point is 00:38:35 Zoom in is... That joke sucked. No, it was good. That joke was bad. It was good. Yeah, yeah, I'm sweating, dude. All right, let's see. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:41 Just zoom in on her, started all over again, and let's just see her from the beginning and just go to her face. You're right. She doesn't want to be there. She does not. It's a hostage. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:02 And they put the dog in the background to give people some semblance. I don't even see the dog. Where's the dog? Watch, it'll poke it right there. I don't even see the dog. Right there. Yeah, where.
Starting point is 00:39:09 Watch the video game? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, there is the dog. Yeah, yeah. What a cute dog. Huh? The dog is like AIs or something on its floor.
Starting point is 00:39:18 Oh, maybe this is AI. It could be AI. Is AI getting me all the time? And I don't even know. AI is so crazy, dude. Do you think models are in trouble because of AI? Well, I know why you're asking that. Why are you asking?
Starting point is 00:39:35 Because on Instagram. I asked, I mean, why am I asking? Because on Instagram. Sometimes I don't know. I've seen, I know. Do you? Well, you've sent me some of the girls that you're questioning. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:46 Is this real? Real or no? Yeah, yeah. No, it's not. But it is funny. Some of them are so, they're so good at copying real influencers. Yeah. That you don't know.
Starting point is 00:39:55 Because how about this? The real influencers, they're putting so many filters on. They look AI now. Exactly. So it's like a hat on a hat. Yeah, they all look fake. They look. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:05 So the fakes look more real than the fake than people. It's fucked. I think filters should be illegal on dating apps. That is a very good point. I know, I'm being real. No, no, no. There is an app that does that. There's one that you can't use makeup and stuff.
Starting point is 00:40:20 There's like a, what is that one? Someone talked to me about there. There's a dating app where people are like in the raw or something. Yeah, real? Is that what it's called? I don't know. Whatever. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:31 But Bobby Lee's new app is going to be no makeup, no. Oh, you can wear makeup. No, no filters. Yeah, yeah, but filters are. Let me see you first thing in the morning. Do your hair and do your face again What? Your hair and your face again
Starting point is 00:40:43 This is your date This should be There should be a dating app Where everybody looks like this That would be amazing Amazing The first thing in the morning First thing in the morning
Starting point is 00:40:53 First thing in the morning Dude that's the app First thing in the morning Dude we Oh I'd get no matches That's not our problem Yeah yeah You can stay on here
Starting point is 00:41:04 Yeah stay on the thing That's where there's AI by the way I get fooled by hinge AI girls That's why I just said it should be illegal. Thank you. You're welcome. I'll vote for you then. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:16 Well, if you'd like to get on our app first thing in the morning, it's all natural. It's completely verified by humans to make sure you're human. You have to call or call center to verify that you're human. But I'm going to be working at the call center. Correct. Okay. Yeah, yeah. And you can reap some of the benefits.
Starting point is 00:41:29 You can go, hey, you know, I work at the call center. So if you want to wear makeup and not wear your first photo, corrupt it. Corrupt the system. Something has to corrupt it. Give them a blue checkmark kind of thing. 100% validate them. I'm being real. That's a good idea.
Starting point is 00:41:43 First thing in the morning is awesome. A dating app? Yeah. That's a really good. That's genius. Because it will force people to go, don't try to look good for this first thing in the morning photo. We will call you out.
Starting point is 00:41:51 Yeah. So first thing in the morning is the app that Bob and I are creating. It's a dating app where you take a photo. Right. Right. Every photo is right in the morning. Right. By the way, you're allowed to, every day you're allowed to update to change that photo.
Starting point is 00:42:03 Like, let's say you don't like it. You're allowed to change everything. You can leave it in perpetuity. But you can. No, no, you can take it. You can take as many photos as you want and choose. No, no, no. I like the idea of your profile photo is you, right?
Starting point is 00:42:15 First thing in the morning. Yeah. If you want to change it, you have to wait a full day. So once you upload it, that's got to stay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you can leave it for a few days if you want. Yeah, but dating apps, you need five or six on your page. No, no, the joke of first thing in the morning is this.
Starting point is 00:42:28 It's not a joke. It's a real app. Sorry. Shopify. Here at Bad Friends, we have an online business. And without Shopify, I don't think we would have this online business. Be very lost. Get started with your own.
Starting point is 00:42:38 own design studio. I think that's what I'm trying to say with hundreds with ready to use templates. Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store, Andrew, that matches your brand style. It's all about style. It's all about style. Poking people in. That's right. Well, because you want to embody whatever you're selling or putting out to the world. It has to be what you are and what you're selling. And Shopify is your commerce expert with world class expertise and everything from managing inventory to international shipping to processing returns and much more beyond that. Shopify helps all businesses of all side. What if I get stuck? Shopify's always around. They're always run to share advice and their award-winning 24-7 customer support. You can tackle all those important tasks in one place from inventory
Starting point is 00:43:17 to payments to analytics and so much more. Talk about the purple button. Did we mention that purple button, Bobby? No. Because that purple shop pay button, it's used by millions of businesses around the world. It's why Shopify has the best, the best converting checkout on the planet. It also helps boost conversions, meaning less carts are going to go abandoned and more sales for you. It's time to turn those What is into Cheching with Shopify today. You can sign up for your $1 per month trial today at Shopify.com slash bad friends. Go to Shopify.com slash bad friends. You heard it right from my friend.
Starting point is 00:43:47 That's Shopify. com slash bad friends. Bluetooth. I'm 54 years old, all right. And I'm going to say this right now. And I'm not embarrassed to admit it. It's harder for me to get up. Upstairs?
Starting point is 00:43:59 You have a little leg. And sometimes you want to go upstairs when the time is right. When the time is right, you want to go upstairs. I mean, you find a lover, right? and I'm telling you right now, and I 100% endorse Blue Chew has saved me. You love it. I love it so much.
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Starting point is 00:44:42 I know. Yeah. I know. This is peak passion and peak performance in a single tablet. Bobby has been chewing Blue Chew for quite a long time now, and I've heard no complaints. No complaints. No complaints. Anybody else.
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Starting point is 00:45:14 That's promo code, bad friends. Visit BluChu.com for more details and important safety information. And we thank Blue Chew for sponsoring the podcast and helping Bobby stay rock hard. Talkspace. Therapy is so important, guys. Every Thursday at 4 o'clock, I do therapy, right? Talkspace is the number one rated online therapy, bringing you professional support from licensed therapists and psychiatry.
Starting point is 00:45:35 Tris that you can access anytime, anywhere. Here's the thing, man. We all need to talk to somebody. Yeah. You know, I don't think you should keep anything bottled up. And sometimes it's hard to talk to your partner. Sometimes it's hard to talk to your parents or your friends. You just kind of want to get it off your chest to a, you know, just a non-partisan party.
Starting point is 00:45:54 And Talkspace makes help convenient for you. You can take these appointments from anywhere you are, your car, your house, your tub, your backyard. It doesn't matter. They give high quality care that's backed by science. Yeah, like I think it changed my life. And also with my therapist, you know what I mean, I can talk to somebody, you know what I mean, I'm dealing with your trauma and whatnot. I think talk space is so important. Well, talk space makes getting help you need easy, accessible and affordable. Plus, most
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Starting point is 00:46:42 Why do you want to make it a joke? Because it is a joke. It's a death jam. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, kind of. No, no, no. We do it. I'm being real.
Starting point is 00:46:51 Okay. We make a real app. First thing in the morning. It's just natural pictures of people. Yeah. Where people really know what you look like.
Starting point is 00:46:59 But the problem I have is okay, tell me. If you let them upload multitudes of photos, they are going to try to manipulate those to look better as time goes. So that's my point.
Starting point is 00:47:07 If you have one photo, that's all you get. That's how you engage. That's more interesting to me to go, that's the one thing I have to work with. Let me go from there. Otherwise, people are going to try to make those other photos look better. They're going to, they're going to find a way to look as sexy as they can first thing in the morning. Yeah, but you can.
Starting point is 00:47:24 You just have to upload one a day. One a day. It goes into your life. That's what I'm saying. So you upload every day. You have to upload every day. And you can keep the one that you liked three days ago and not upload. Pin it.
Starting point is 00:47:34 You can pin it. You can pin it. Okay, good, good, good. All right, good, good, yeah, yeah. And then what's... How do you start it? We'll get an app guy. By the way, there's an app guy
Starting point is 00:47:44 listening to our pod, develop again as we speak. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like, got it, I'm going to make a billion dollars. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We should hire someone to develop that app. Yeah. First thing in the way. And we've talked about it too much.
Starting point is 00:47:53 Yeah. So AI... I honestly think it's a good idea. It's a very good idea. Yeah, don't you think it's a good idea? Natural. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because we've been deceived.
Starting point is 00:48:02 you know what I mean how about this one I'm deceiving you no no you like rule up to a house you see them walking out of the house and then you just drive away
Starting point is 00:48:09 that's happened but I've gone before I've gone out with them me too I've done that too horrible you're like come on in
Starting point is 00:48:15 now I see these stories online Wonka wonka Wonka Wonka Star Wars AI movie Star Wars AI movie Howca
Starting point is 00:48:25 Wonka Wonka How come I see these stories online of so many of these women being stood up on these dates
Starting point is 00:48:31 I know Bullshit though. Is this bullshit? Because I see these TikToks or these Instagram reels. Amen. I'm people being like, I got stood up again and I'm like, is this happening that much? But I feel like it's happening the other way. Girls are standing up dudes for sure.
Starting point is 00:48:44 Yeah. You've been stood up. Twice. I've stood up more girls than not. So I've actually done it. Oh, shit. Really? I've done it through scheduling.
Starting point is 00:48:53 I've done it. Yeah, flaking. No, no, not flaking. I just scheduling. What do you mean? What's the different? Like something comes up. Like, you know.
Starting point is 00:48:59 Oh, a fake thing. I got one more dating app. for us. Oh, give me the one. I don't feel so good. That's what it's called. I don't feel so good. You see them at that worst.
Starting point is 00:49:09 And when they're sick. Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. Yeah. I don't feel so good. Yeah. So the whole, the purpose. Well, let's go all the way.
Starting point is 00:49:16 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Can you take a look at this? That's what it's called. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:22 Does this look bad to you? Tumors. Tumors. Tumors. Yeah. Do you have tumors? Yeah. Do you have tumors?
Starting point is 00:49:30 Yeah. I do too. Murs. Yeah. Honestly, I think a sick one where the photos of you are when you have been very sick are very, it's very funny. Because what you look like when you're sick, that's the fucking, that's way worse than first thing in the morning. Oh, yeah, yeah. Because when you're sick, you look the worst.
Starting point is 00:49:50 Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know. I'm experimenting. I know you are. First in the morning.
Starting point is 00:49:56 I'm an app developer. Oh, yeah, yeah. First thing in the morning will take. We'll do that way. Yeah, I like that way. Yeah. Someone is doing it. You know that.
Starting point is 00:50:03 What's up, dog? Is that All Saints? What are you wearing there, Mike? Oh, see, he's interested in the clothes already. Oh, you like the shirt? Yeah. I like the fit because I don't. This is my merch.
Starting point is 00:50:12 Oh, this is your merch. Yeah. Really good fit. Thank you, bro. The pants too? This is Puma. Oh. I rock Puma, nothing but Puma.
Starting point is 00:50:18 And then the shirt says buildings don't fall like that. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, which is just a fun. 9-11. You get it. You got YouTube. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:25 Yeah. I'm a YouTube guy. You know, buildings don't fall like that, too. They don't. I think it's important to talk. And laugh about it. First of all, it used to be funny. Now it's just too true.
Starting point is 00:50:35 Yeah. People too much people know. We found out all the conspiracy theories turned out to be real. Yeah. Q and on was correct on almost everything they predicted. They did. Nailed it.
Starting point is 00:50:44 Pizza, pizza, pizza. Honestly, I was nailing it the last 12 years, hammered drunk at most bars. Yeah, you were telling people the truth. Now I'm like, I'm calling people like, like, dude, I was right the whole time. Yeah, I'm still on your fit, though. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:55 He liked the fit. He loves the shoes. Puma also. Yeah, yeah. White, brand new. No, I keep them clean. I got some dirty. I get the same ones dirty.
Starting point is 00:51:03 Yeah, yeah. You look good today, man. Thank you, bro. Insinuating, I look bad most days. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. No, wait. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:51:12 No, no, no, no. That's what I was insinuating. Is that the word? It is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was just saying, I was giving you a compliment. Thank you, bro. How nice you look today.
Starting point is 00:51:19 Thank you. That's all it was. Cincinnati's finest. Cincinnati, right? Oh, yeah. Cincinnati. Yeah, we're a couple of Mugwest boys that attended a great university in the desert. That's right, dude.
Starting point is 00:51:27 Phoenix. Mm-hmm. Arizona State. Go Devils. That's his mother, is his mother's home now. Really? What are her cross streets? Tell him what you're on?
Starting point is 00:51:34 If I was going to focus on one of the windows in the home, which would I... That's a good one. Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You like Asian ladies? You know what? I got one at the crib right now. You really?
Starting point is 00:51:44 Yeah. Do I know her? No, she's, I don't date of the comics. Yeah, yeah. I try not to. I don't. I actually act. Do I know her?
Starting point is 00:51:53 Do I know her? You know what? Do I know her? I see Mike at the comedy's all the time. I know you guys all know each other. You're right? Right. So you mean there could have...
Starting point is 00:52:01 You know what? We live close to your hood. I live by K-town, so... Yeah, yeah, yeah. I drive home sometime and just that. We don't know each other too well, but I'm always like, what if I just turned and saw Bobby? We're just getting a handy in the alley. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:12 In Ketown. Yeah. It's more likely he's over there eating Korean barbecue. Barbecue, yeah. Which is not the same thing sometimes. It is. Is she full-blooded or half? She is full-blooded.
Starting point is 00:52:21 She's not your... This is my first of all, she's not Korean. I want to say that. That's fine. Yeah, which is... Which I love because... Yeah. We love that.
Starting point is 00:52:30 I want more... Because you guys are like elite Asians. That's right! Can you see that again? You're elevated Asians. Can you see that again, please? You're elite Asians, you're aware of this, right? Thank you.
Starting point is 00:52:38 There are rankings. The Asians no. Is she Chinese? No. She's ocean. That's also not... She's... You go on?
Starting point is 00:52:45 Filipino. No. Leocon. The ocean. Stay on land. You're getting closer. Thai. there was a
Starting point is 00:52:51 Yeah, give us some hit Yeah, there was a similar war to Korea Cambodian Brother, you don't know This is tough Do you know what I'm like You went to her straight to Cambodia I cheated up there
Starting point is 00:53:03 There was a similar war Stay in the fucking game Cambodian no All right, good Let's stay in the game All right All right We did family few
Starting point is 00:53:13 We lost the flavor flavor flavor We're dealing with That was rigged That was fucking rigged That's what you're dealing with Okay. Yeah. Not Laotian.
Starting point is 00:53:21 Wait, what did I say? Not Cambodian. Not Thai. All right. So, you said Thai, Filipino,
Starting point is 00:53:25 Chinese. Give us another a hint, please. Phenomenal, um, culinary stuff really good and, uh, like a huge,
Starting point is 00:53:34 a huge, Vietnam, yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:39 Now that wasn't much of a war. Brother, I think we won. Yeah. You know, I like to tell people we did. Yeah, yeah, and that's why I always say,
Starting point is 00:53:45 our relationship, if it ends, I'm gonna tell everybody I won't. We want. What's your favorite Vietnam movie, you think? My favorite rom-com is Hamburger Hill.
Starting point is 00:53:53 I stick around for the... It's all good. I stick around for the Blue Perts at the end. No, I don't know. I probably like... I mean, they're all pretty depressing. There's none letter like...
Starting point is 00:54:01 Yeah. What's the full metal jacket? Classic. So funny. The classic... Full-metal jacket might be one of the best movies of all times. You think?
Starting point is 00:54:09 That's a tough... That's a bold... I love that movie. It's such a... Yeah, yeah. I'm fine with that. It's a dark, beautiful movie. It's a...
Starting point is 00:54:18 It says a lot. lot. And then I'm like almost, I'm 39. So when I watched that movie growing up, that was such a, the first time you see a movie where you're like, yo, what the fuck? What the fuck? Yeah. Like halfway through, you're like, what? There's more movie. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm not joined the military. Yeah. Oh my God. Well, I'm from the Midwest. So you, when I saw that as a kid, I was like, I don't think I'm going to join the military. No. The first half of full metal jack late, you're like, I can't deal with that. Yeah. Screaming? Yeah. Yeah. Me waking up at a certain hour. Get up, you little things of shit. It's 2 p.m.
Starting point is 00:54:48 How close were you to joining the military out of high school? I wasn't, but I'm like, that's what I say about the Midwest. You either leave the Midwest at 18, you're dying in the Middle East. Yeah. Right. It's true. A real good slogan. Yeah, that's my other merch.
Starting point is 00:55:02 It's in camouflage. It doesn't hit us hard. So many Midwest people, a lot of our friends, yeah, I think like they go for the Midwest first. Yeah, we're easy. I think that we are very American, proud of the American. Very American. Yes. So I say I didn't go, but a lot of my good friends joined.
Starting point is 00:55:18 A couple of homies passed away. That's awesome. I know. Yeah, honestly, that was my origin comedy stories. My buddy passed away when I was 21. I was like, I hit the family up. I was like, yo, I got to speak at his funeral. I had the preacher crying and laughing.
Starting point is 00:55:31 And that was the first time I was like, yo, I can do something with this. Yeah. If I got people cracking up at a funeral. Yeah. Because I was 21 and that nobody knows anybody more at that age than your friends. You know what I mean? Your parents and your family don't know you at 21.
Starting point is 00:55:45 My dog died last Saturday. Maybe you should have showed up. Yeah. I would have crushed. Chuck'll cry. Yeah. Yeah. Well, first of all, I told the story, I told the story the other night about you flirting
Starting point is 00:55:56 with the vet tech that came to put your dog to rest. Yeah. I mean, that's amazing. The guy's dog is dying and the vet comes and he's trying to fuck. Yeah. He timed out the blue chew snorted a bad time. He's like, Daddy's rock hard. You took the wrong pill.
Starting point is 00:56:13 Goodbye, Remy. Hello, Mommy. insane. Hey, we all mourn differently. That's exactly right. But I gave him credit. You're vulnerable. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:23 As a California boy, do you think I'm a pussy? I don't think I know. Facts. You think I am, though. You think I'm a little weaker, my strand. Because you're California? Yeah, yeah. I'm San Diego boy, L.A., most of my life.
Starting point is 00:56:38 Southern California. I think my generalization on my worldview is yes. Oh, you think that I'm... This is just because you're from SoCal oftentimes. Now, if he was from... So Cal and he was Mexican, different story. Different stuff. East L.A.
Starting point is 00:56:49 You have no East L.A. in you. That's right. O. Go, what do I have in me? You've got, uh, West L.A. You've got a lot of garden grove in you, maybe some O.C. Yeah. Okay, okay, okay. You've got some, uh, nice, uh, Anaheim areas.
Starting point is 00:57:01 Right. Boba. There's some boba in my story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, there's some boba in my story. Yeah. He's a lot more monabello. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:57:09 Yeah. Yeah. He doesn't, though, he's rocking. When he starts rocking. This is deep Socal. Don't come a knocking, dude. This guy, he'll go nuts. I'll go nuts on you, guys.
Starting point is 00:57:19 I'll go nuts, dude. You know what I mean? Anyway, yeah, there's some suburb in me too. Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mall life, my life. A lot of mall life. You know what?
Starting point is 00:57:27 I'm not above mall life. Good people watching. Okay, good, good, good, good, good, good. San Diego. But you think in a war, no, I think he started something with me. I'll go for it. Yeah, yeah, fuck him up. You think in a war-like situation, I am much older than you are.
Starting point is 00:57:38 Much. Yeah, yeah, but you think. They're not recruiting you. Yeah, yeah. Not now. Sure. Yeah, but back in my day, we're at the same age, you think that you would stand,
Starting point is 00:57:47 you would be tougher and more resilient in a warlike situation. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, did I used to crush laser tag? Oh, right, right, right, right. Okay, good, good. I could dodge and stuff like that. Because I took third when I did the VR boom,
Starting point is 00:58:01 I mean, sandbox? You got the laser. The last one I got number one, but I was with, you know what I mean, Jules and that. Yeah, but maybe you're right, yeah, yeah. This guy, he'll cheat in an escape room. He's so clever. He's good.
Starting point is 00:58:14 I'll do it twice and then take a date on it. He goes, oh, no, this is how you're doing. But that's what's so good about you is that's why Bobby would be good in wartime. He would find a way. I find a way to live and survive. That's fair. It's selfish, though. So what?
Starting point is 00:58:30 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It depends on your perspective on what's good at war. Kills or survival. You're surviving. Yeah. I always thought that in a war movie, right? You and I would be dead. We'd be dead.
Starting point is 00:58:39 We'd get a couple kills. 100%. I get no kills, but your dead bodies would, you'd be on me. Yeah. I ever thought that? You would pull me over you. Yeah, we'd be two dead bodies and just pretend I'm dead like that.
Starting point is 00:58:51 I'd die in a murder suey dude. I'd kill a guy and be like, dude, I can't. I can't go on. Like my legs would be blown off and I'd get a few hits and then be like, I gotta get on it. I can't go out of it. But in a Forrest Gump situation, you know what I mean? My leg's blown off. Would you come and get me and drag me or no?
Starting point is 00:59:04 I would get you. You'd seem the most carryable. That's a very good, you're a thinker. Well, this is post-Walgovi. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Post-Wgovi, yes. We'll go a little bit harder.
Starting point is 00:59:14 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Speaking of which that Tom Hanks threw me, I saw on the shitter this morning, Jim Ursay, the old owner of the Colts. Sure. You're a big football fan. He's a big football fan. He sold, you're going to love this, dude.
Starting point is 00:59:28 This is going to blow your mind. He had the biggest collection of sports and whatever memorabilia that you've ever seen in your life. He has a fucking a guitar of Hendrix. He's got Dylan's guitar. He's got, this guy had, look at this collection. and it's up for live auction now.
Starting point is 00:59:45 Oh, dude. The collection this guy had is so unbelievable. Yeah. He's got the lyrics of fucking Hey Jude handwritten by McCartney. I mean, really? The collection is, Explore the 3D space.
Starting point is 00:59:58 I want to, or whatever, go through it. And he's got John's passive aggressive corrections on there too. Yeah, exactly. It's a deep Beatles. Not what we know. For all the people to watch all four episodes. It was so good. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:09 But look at that. Wow. Hold on, hold on. Oh, wait, there we go. So a lot of rock and roll. But not, no, but dude, he had, he had Ali's robe that he wore out. Oh, slugger. Oh, really?
Starting point is 01:00:21 Hunter S. Thompson, that's Hunter S Thompson's car. Wow. That's amazing. That's the fucking saddle from, what's the horse that want? That's the, that's a secretariat? Secretary. That's the original script that Rocky was written in that, that, that's incredible, dude. You know, so Stallone probably wrote it on a typewriter and then wrote it down just be like,
Starting point is 01:00:41 me what I did. Jack Kerouac's TypeScript scroll of on the road Kerouac's book on the road on type script. Wow. That's a weird one
Starting point is 01:00:48 that's amazing. No, that's amazing. That book is so fucking good man. Amazing. This guy's got so, like this is the kind of shit but I met
Starting point is 01:00:54 yeah, Gretzky's jersey from his 500. Oh, damn. Keep going. That's a lot of value there too. A lot of value there.
Starting point is 01:01:01 I think they said some of it is you can't price it. Oh, this is the one that you would have loved to. Which one? Smells like Teen Spirit
Starting point is 01:01:08 Kurt's guitar from Smells like Teen Spirit. Yeah. Really? The actual fucking guitar. From like the video or like... From the video. From the video, right?
Starting point is 01:01:16 Yeah. Johnny Cash's D-21 acoustic. Yeah. I don't know if I had the money that I would do that. If you had his money? Yes, you would. No, I wouldn't. Bobby, the guy was worth billions.
Starting point is 01:01:28 What are you going to do with it? You of all people love music shit. Yeah. You wouldn't go buy Cobain's left-handed Fender Mustang. How much is it? It's not priced on there. It's a bit, it's forbidding. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:01:37 The estimate is crazy. Is that 2 to 5 mil? 2.5 to 5. It's either 2.5 million to 5 million. That's a big gap. I think maybe, yeah, you're right. That one I want. You would. You'd want specific things. Clapton's the fool, Gibson. Look at how fucking... But like Janice Jockelon's toenail,
Starting point is 01:01:52 I don't know, what? Five dollars. But yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You'd want things that are personal to your... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, if you had unlimited... If you had unlimited funds, Mike, what would you buy? I would do some weird... Like, I'm a big hip-hop guy, but I don't know. I'd like get the MPC player that Dilla did some stuff on maybe or something like that. Or like some tribe called Quest shit. I don't know. Oh, right.
Starting point is 01:02:09 Low-low. a good album. Great out. You know what I always thought that I would love? People's Indictive Travels too, but yeah. You know what I always thought I would love?
Starting point is 01:02:16 The carpets that are in recording rooms that go underneath the musical instruments to muffle the sound. Yeah. I want one of those carpets from someone powerful. Oh, that's cool. To put in my house.
Starting point is 01:02:25 Because these things, they sit on a shelf and I think, this I'd want the carpet to be my fucking carpet in my house. Yeah. I want the carpet from the menendez killings. Yeah. In the parents' bedroom?
Starting point is 01:02:35 Yeah, with the bloodstain. Yeah, I always wonder that. How much is that? I want the duvet cover. It's beautiful. It's beautiful stuff. Miles Davis's trumpet. I mean, get fucked.
Starting point is 01:02:44 I don't know what I would like the sports stuff too. And then I'm a big movie guy. Wouldn't you like things from movies? Well, look, what's something from a famous film that like moved you or with that? Like the gun that Vincent DiNofrio blasts had off 20 minutes into full metal. That's all. That's a fun. That's a fun.
Starting point is 01:02:57 That is a fun one. That is a fun one. That is actually weird. That is very dark. I went immediately dark, but pretty fun. I got one. Oh, yeah. Right.
Starting point is 01:03:05 I mean, we'll walk in here. That car that he slapped. Oh, the taxi? Midnight Cowboy, right? Hey, we're walking here. You know what I mean? That car I'd buy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:14 Oh, you know what else? $100. He had the original, he had the original volleyball from fucking castaway. No. He had Wilson. Really? That's, yeah. He has some movie stuff in there that was pretty cool.
Starting point is 01:03:26 That's pretty cool. Like the, oh, you know, I showed you the photo. And I think we can say it. It doesn't matter. But over at Spade's house, I got emotional because in the hallway. I saw it. as Farley's jacket. Oh, that'd be.
Starting point is 01:03:40 And dude, it's even looking at it. Which jacket? If I got on a little coat jacket or what? No, a jacket when he was three years old. That one, right? Yeah, yeah, that jacket. The Tommy Boy Jack. Tommy Joe Jack.
Starting point is 01:03:49 Yeah. The jacket on Tommy and Tommy. How much is it? Sorry, Mike, I'm bombing. I like that. She's tank in the room. 101 grand it sold for. Wow.
Starting point is 01:03:59 And then now this image has conspiracy theory stuff all over it too. Does it? Oh, yeah. Tell me one. No, let's go. Well, like that image is something that is on a lot of celebrity shirts. It's something very similar to that and that is something that they now with
Starting point is 01:04:11 the Epstein stuff coming out is like attached to that. What? Wow, wow, wow. Connect that to like there's some weird conspiracies. Turner, open us up, dude, open my mind. I mean, there's some, yeah, Kuhon. Oh, baseless. I don't know. Baseless. Pedophilia myths.
Starting point is 01:04:27 Way, pop culture trivia. The original heavily damaged Wilson prop in the film was sold at auction for $308,000 confirmed its high status in pop culture rather than any hidden sinister meaning this sounds like AI is trying to convince us of what I mean? Yeah, why would they say that? You said it, I didn't think. You brought this up.
Starting point is 01:04:44 Yeah, come on, AI. It's like Ellen has a shirt with it. Jay-Z has a shirt with it. It's tough stuff. Ellen. Ellen. Is she gone? What did she do? Did she leave? Didn't she get mad at Trump and left the country? What a fall off? What am I honestly growing up? One of my favorite stand-up. And now you're like, what the hell? She was a great stand-up.
Starting point is 01:04:59 The early ones are so fucking good. So good. Now you're like, oh, she's a monster. Remember the deer antler bit? The deer antler bit on the wall. Didn't she have a bit like that? Maybe. I just remember the slipping and falling one was great. Oh, that's a good one, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:13 I like the elevator button. Yeah, that's how good she is. There's like three. It's a lot of good button. Yeah, I already pushed it. Yeah, yeah. It might make it come faster. I love that.
Starting point is 01:05:22 It's such a stupid idea. Yeah. Yeah, she was great. And then she just, now she's gone. Yeah. I mean, the Anne Hess death. I think she got two. You know that?
Starting point is 01:05:32 Oh, yeah. She died on a, a car that all of a sudden went speeding through Brentwood or something like that and then she was pronounced dead on the scene but if there's a video of her going to the ambulance where she physically gets out of the gurney it's crazy that's insane she wakes up for a second
Starting point is 01:05:46 then they push her back down it's creepy creepy shit whoa that is where their last words were castaway should have won the Oscar so that's the whole circle wow wow wow wow yeah so Mike where can we see your special it's on YouTube yeah and when did you release it on you know what I did so
Starting point is 01:06:04 I filmed it on New Year's, and then I'm familiar with the Asian culture, and I dropped it on Lunar New Year. Thank you. So, Chukung M. Mai. Thank you. Vietnamese. I don't know what your culture says, but happy belated lunar. Thank you. And so, yeah, it's on YouTube.
Starting point is 01:06:19 Michael Turner, comedy on YouTube. And then, yeah, just dropped it. I filmed it at Fort Collins on New Year's Eve. I've never seen anybody film a special on New Year's Eve. And I like, you know what? I like keeping things loose. I'm like loose, but also tight with my bits. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:32 And New Year's is a very combative night sometimes. I thought it'd be fun. Shout to Fort Collins. Congratulations. Thank you, man. Yeah. Self-funded and it's all me. Well, Michael Turner's a very, very, very funny stand-up.
Starting point is 01:06:43 He's up and coming. We love him here at Bad Friends and go check out his fucking special on YouTube. Also, by the way, you do a great job for people that are sports fans. You are a sports fan, but specific sports fans. Have you ever done it as a soccer game? I know. Because he's a diehard soccer fan. Really?
Starting point is 01:06:59 That's interesting. You would do it for you. Wait, wait, wait, wait, what's that? Why? Well, I don't know. I just don't know. meet a lot of soccer fans in America. Okay, good, very good.
Starting point is 01:07:06 Yeah, good counter. Am I being, Mike, I just want to let you. I know you're blushing, but I quit smoking a couple days ago. I'm a little agitated. I know it comes across as I'm being combative, right? But it's just me full of anxiety. I said, oh, interesting. Why the fuck is it interesting?
Starting point is 01:07:24 Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's what that's coming from. Funny how, motherfucker. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I apologize. No, you're doing fine. Yeah, yeah. And I don't say it enough.
Starting point is 01:07:33 I'm proud of you. See? Thank you so much, Mike. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I told you he's proud of, yeah, thank you. No, he does interviews outside of football games, and they're very, very fucking funny. Okay, brother. And it's usually, it's a little bit of nagging.
Starting point is 01:07:46 It's, but it's, but it's light ribbing in a way that people would really love that like sports. And it's somebody, like, I know enough about the opposing team to make fun of them, but also be aware. I'm a fan of bad sports teams, too, so it's like, you can make fun of me too. I know. So it's fun, yeah. I'm sorry, brother. Cincinnati Bengals, Cincinnati, San Diego, Reds.
Starting point is 01:08:03 Arizona State, Sun Devils, Phoenix Suns. Arizona State, not that you would give a fuck whatsoever. We literally played a men's basketball game two days ago and lost 45 points, I think it was. I think it was 50 points. Yeah, pretty cool. And Barbara Hillier was like, I'm out. I'm done. Can you imagine this in soccer would be losing like 12 to nil.
Starting point is 01:08:19 That's how big of a game. In men's basketball, losing by 50 is unheard of. It's like a, it's like even the players who were winning were like, are you guys okay? Yeah. Yeah. We're tapping in. Yeah. We're fucking you guys out.
Starting point is 01:08:32 I had friends I haven't heard of in years being like, you good, dog? You're a heart, bro? Yeah. Yeah, you need some help. But I do, I like sports, drinking beer, talking shit, and so I go to sports games
Starting point is 01:08:41 and sporting events, and then I do a tour around it every year. So it's fun. So that's my, that's, you gotta be self-starter in comedy, as you guys know, so just started doing shit. Well, you're here, aren't you?
Starting point is 01:08:52 This is great, yeah, I appreciate you guys, put me on the play. Oh, we're proud of you on the top. You guys are always been very kind of me, so I appreciate it. And can I be honest with you? Uh-oh.
Starting point is 01:09:01 Uh-oh. Careful. Settle in. Yeah, I want to settle in. Let's be real. Yeah, say what you need to say. I don't think I have been that kind of you. That's fair.
Starting point is 01:09:08 No, I don't think that I've given you enough time of myself. I think I'm, let's be honest with you. I think that I've been in and out with you. I think I don't know. I'll just, I think it's the no, the Jonesing that I'm feeling, but I feel a little vulnerable right now. You're saying in general right now? I think in general, I, I, pay, pass them a lot at the store and I don't really take the time to say hi. I think that you let's be on let's get
Starting point is 01:09:36 that let's get it on the table. You are an interesting guy to me because I know you and I are good friends when I see you it's always love and say whatever. And so sometimes like I remember initially when you guys started the pot I was like oh Bobby would probably be cool to me and we've we've had we've had some back and force. You know what it is though? Yeah yeah yeah. I'm just who I am. I'm from the Midwest. I'm just a dude that's from Cincinnati. Yeah. And I remember one of our first interactions. This is probably something that's not shocking to either of you. I think you like tried to high kick me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And like, speaking of soccer, being a soccer fan, now I know you're just
Starting point is 01:10:05 a soccer fan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He tried to, yeah. I think that's what it was. Lou Kang me. Yeah, he tried to bite kick me. I was like, dude, I've seen Mortal Kombat and I've got a couple of Asian stereotypes I can kick at you too. I understand that. But I'm above that. But that's what I remember in my relationship with you. It's not like, it's more like a violence. Well, so. Yeah. And so I want to change. Yeah. No, today's the day. We're buddies with the same. I am I am I yeah we talked about him let me clarify something okay okay he will only kick you you so now knowing like seeing some am I right I know I everyone
Starting point is 01:10:39 I do think let's just get that out of the way I think about that now and hindsight and was it was it high it was impressive that's a good one and this is pre-GLP yeah yeah yeah yeah that's because I like you so again now I know that yeah I was like newer to L.A and I was I'm just not the type of cat that'd be like that was cool yeah yeah and I didn't say anything but I probably gave you body language was like, yo. That wasn't cool.
Starting point is 01:11:02 Nah. Oh, I think that's what I read. I think that's what I read and I was like, I said not myself. Yes. I thought you did. Good, I don't like your reaction. 100%.
Starting point is 01:11:13 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, who the fuck is? It's a headliner? Which is. Yeah, you know, I don't see his name on the wall. You know what I don't bend the knee and I don't. I know you don't. I know what?
Starting point is 01:11:21 And now we have an understanding. Yeah, yeah. Right. But the next time I'm a high kick you, da guy. I'm fucking grabbing it. Okay. You'm saying?
Starting point is 01:11:27 Maybe a DDT? Okay, okay, good. His girlfriend, he's been training for years. She's Vietnamese. Her family's all Vietnamese. There's traps. I've been to the house. You know how a battle test and I am out?
Starting point is 01:11:39 You ever party with some Vietnamese people? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what the fuck to do. Wait, this is interesting because you, I want just a quick perspective share of where in the overlap of the pie charts of you've adopted a Filipino family into your life. Oh, that's interesting. You've adopted a Vietnamese family into your life. Sure.
Starting point is 01:11:57 I want to know what the similarities are of like, because you live, they live at your house. Yeah, they do. And now you're embedded into their life. Yeah, we've lived together for a couple years now. Do you have, are there moments where? Let me ask it. Yeah, let me ask.
Starting point is 01:12:11 Can they sleep anywhere? Yes, she could sleep anywhere. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a similar, right? Yeah, yeah. She's like, in the kitchen on the floor? They sleep everywhere. They do, they just fall asleep when they do.
Starting point is 01:12:23 I'll just go, oh, right, right? And it just jewels on a fucking chair sleeping. Can they eat like anything? Yeah, yeah. And like in amounts that are alarming. Yeah, yeah. I've done this.
Starting point is 01:12:34 Like, I'll get two Jersey Mike sandwiches. Yeah. Right? Two. Yeah. You're eating two? No, I don't eat them all to say. I have an emergency one. Oh, first of all, good.
Starting point is 01:12:43 Good check on that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's crazy. I'm a huge. I love to say Mike's guy. That's nuts. Yeah, yeah. So I'll get two, right?
Starting point is 01:12:50 And I'll do an emergency one. That's smart. Yeah, yeah. And I'll keep that in the fridge, right? And then it'll be there for like, I don't know how long. Yeah. eat it. They'll eat. After like a week. A week. Yeah, yeah. They'll delete it. And they'll eat the rapper too. They won't eat the rapper. Yeah, yeah. They don't waste.
Starting point is 01:13:06 They're very not wasting. They don't waste it. Yeah, yeah. Well, and then are they actually from the Philippines and now live here? Oh yeah. Yeah. So she's, okay. Yeah, well, you know how it is. I want to hike it's so bad. I just want a high kick you so bad right now, dude. It's your girlfriend from. So half her family's from Vietnam, but she was born in Cali. So she has a, she's more of Cali. Mine's from the actual. Yeah, yeah. Well, half her family. family is and I party with them a lot and we kick it a lot. They're great. I've never have more support in my life, but if you cross them, the most, you never cross it's the most combative shit. Right. So if this relationship, which I hope it never does go south, you need to
Starting point is 01:13:39 leave the country. You know what's funny is if it hits, it'd be so, it'd be so cold and icy that it would be no interaction ever again. It'd be dead in a way that would hurt more than if it was combat. I got you. I got you. If it's if it was with a white girl, you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah, but this is like, ooh. Yeah. And also Southeast Asia, both Philippines. That's the other crossover in Southeast Asia, but Filipinos are obviously on the island. Yeah. But Vietnamese are, that's like kind of that energy is a little similar.
Starting point is 01:14:09 I've always found. Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, Filipinos. Is that fair? It is fair. I'm doing hippie white. And hippie whites, though, right? This is your first hippie white. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:14:18 Hippie whites are different. They're a lot more like Asians. In what way? They'll eat anything. Well, that's because they're high. Is that why? That's the weed. I see it.
Starting point is 01:14:29 That's the weed. Okay, okay, okay. But also hippie whites are like Asians in this trying to find... In the Zenway. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Probably closer to Buddhism. Yeah, right. The Catholicism.
Starting point is 01:14:40 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And this hippie... You'll leave the room while they're doing this. Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And this hippie Asian has coached. You know, I got out, you know, as coached it.
Starting point is 01:14:50 It is interesting that you're open-minded to other Asians, though. Usually other Asians, which is fun. Whoa, whoa, what? What? What? What? What? Like I know
Starting point is 01:14:58 Koreans don't like Chinese That's absolutely not true Well, all right Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I love all the Asians Except for This is you What?
Starting point is 01:15:08 Except for What? Which one? Indians You can always get one I'm totally kidding No, I love everybody He's kidding
Starting point is 01:15:15 I'm kidding Look in the mic Look in there and go Thank you for being a bad friend Well first of all We want to thank Mike for coming home show I already did that
Starting point is 01:15:21 We already plugged a special You did Yeah yeah yeah I just have to go He's got to go on He's got a date You got to go. Oh, really?
Starting point is 01:15:27 With the hippie girl? Yeah, yeah. I've got to go. Thank you for being a bad friend. Is that what I said? Say it again. Feel good. Thank you for being a bad friend.
Starting point is 01:15:34 Love it. Yeah. I don't know when this episode comes out, right? But the towels were not done. Really? Yeah. After all of this. After all of that.
Starting point is 01:15:47 We did an entire episode about towels. About the towels were not done. Three in the morning last night, I texted Jules. I go, where are my towels? Right? And she goes, I'm going to Hawaii. She went clubbing too She went clubbing for three hours
Starting point is 01:16:00 Maybe the merch will be your towels at some point Yeah Use some of our purchase towels Maybe But she did not do the towel Insane All right

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