Bad Friends - Trash Rummaging with Rudy

Episode Date: September 21, 2026

Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/c/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Warby Parker, Cash App, NOCD, Ultra & Hungry Root • Warby Parker: Our listeners can buy one pair of glasses and get 20% off any additional pairs at https://warbyparker.com/BADFRIENDS and using our link helps support the show. #WarbyParker #ad • Cash App*: Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/hhm54e0a #cashapppod • NOCD: If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started at https://learn.nocd.com/BADFRIENDS • Ultra: Don’t sleep on @ultrapouches. New customers get 15% Off with code BADFRIENDS at https://takeultra.com! #UltraPouches #ad • Hungry Root: Explore my digital cookbook, BOBBY MOM, for free at https://hungryroot.com/BADFRIENDS. And for a limited time get 40% off your first order PLUS a free item in every box for life with code BADFRIENDS. YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Audio Subscribe: https://apple.co/31Jsvr2 Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Pagpag & Orinoco Flow 7:00 Korean Coastguard 11:00 Carlos Needs a Swear Jar 16:30 Rudy Turns 25 19:00 Popcorn Butter Poisoning 25:00 Bill Cosby's Pudding Pops 27:30 Red Vines vs Sour Patch Kids 32:20 Bad Friends Goes To The Movies 47:20 "Ay Man" & The Hawaiian Birthday 51:30 Bobby's Special & Rudy's Mom Returns 56:30 Donnell Rawlings Phone Number 1:00:00 Toads Feet, Potions, and Crystal Balls 1:06:15 McKone the Magician More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@7equis Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ * Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Cash App Green features, Savings, Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This video contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mating! Made it! Part of the Beast is the must-see adventure of the year. It's just you and me, boy. One of the most extraordinary on-screen brunt you'll ever see. I'll get you home. Brad Pitt, Art of the Beast. September 25th, get tickets now. Whoa.

Me? That's amazing. Who made this? Who made that? Wow. I love that. That's amazing. That's high art. That's just gross, that you're the big one. I've always been the big one.

You think you're the boss? Look at me, guy No, I don't want to look at Yeah, yeah, look at me right now Like me sick No, look at me right now, guy This guy made it Without a brain creations

Thank you to this guy For making an incredible piece of art For the show Thank you I'm the boss No, look at me No Yeah, you want confrontations right now

I will do conversations with you Because earlier today I come in here Okay I get it No, finish your No, I don't want it Because did you see the

I saw You saw it right It's called pause rage. Prage. Yeah, it's called preach. I have. And you just did prage.

I don't have any prage. Yeah, yeah. You had to take a beat to squel. To squalor. All I want to say to you is. Okay, you're the boss. Good day, mate. Good day, mate to you.

Good day, mate to you. I just got back from Australia. And you, you liked it? It was fun. Did you eat kangaroo? I ate a koala toenail. You have to boil it. How long?

For a long time. Two days. Full day? But the toenail's so thick, you've got to soften it. Oh, right. It becomes like gelatinous. Uh-huh. And then you put on toast.

Wow, a little toenail toast. Yeah, tonal toast. What do you think? You know that? It's a custom. Would you do that? I would eat it. Yeah. Oh, can I tell you about your eating habits, by the way?

Please. If I may. Yeah, please. Yeah. I realized Pog Pog is a part of their nature. What is Pog-Bug? What you were eating today? What?

You look in the fridge and you'll see. find the oldest thing in the fridge, you'll go, I'll eat that. Ah, leftover food savage from restaurant or fast food garbage dumps and recooked for consumption. Puck, Pug, Pug. That's not your word? Yes, it is.

It is. It's a tag-along term. Pug-bug, bug, bug. It just means... That's what it is. It's trash rummaging. Yeah, it's trash rummaging, the deep fry it. I got to be honest with you. Yeah.

That bag, right? Look, zoom in. That looks like chin-chin. Who are these two idiots? White dude and an Asian dude. You too? To you two or something. We're bad friends.

Caribbean Blue is what I call it. Enya. Yeah. Love that song. Dude. Enya? She lives in a castle with cats. You know that?

She lives in a castle. Caribbean Blue. Let me tell you something. Too late. It's too late, dude. When I'm in the grocery store and Enya comes on, it's the song. Orinoco Loca Loco Flow.

Orinoco Flow. It's called Orinoco Flow. It's always on. You know about Orinoco Flow? Oh yeah, you do. It's a classic New Age centerpiece. We have to play it for a second.

We have to play it for a second. Orinocchio Flo. It's one of the greatest. It's one of the greatest. It's the quintessential New Age song of that decade. Oh my God. What do I need? Peanut butter.

Toothaste. I'm at the grocery store and I'm really feeling it. Glodust. Glodust. Don't be saying. Oronoco flow. Oronoco flow. Soco loco floe.

It's a cea loco loco flo. And you see it, it's a roco roco flow. Here it is, ready? Da, da, da. I wrote this. I went to the castle, I wrote this part. Do you remember? That summer.

I do, and that's summer. I went through the window, I went, do you remember that? And she's like, what are you doing? I go, that'd be the next section of the song, or loco-noko-noko-flo. Here it goes. Yeah, here we go. Sail away, sail away, sail away.

Because you have to. Sail away, sail away, get it. Get out of here with your boat. Oh, stay. Please stay. All right. Drop your anchor. Sorry, I was in the moment.

Orinoco flow. By the way, the fact she didn't call it sail away is hilarious. Call it sail away. Call it sail away, Kenya. It's obviously sail away. I'll say musicality. Orinoco flow. Orinoco flow.

What is? Orinocofo. What? Let me try that. Orano. I'm doing it. I'm doing the L. version. Orinoco flo?

I can't roll my arms. Hey, player, is that the Orinoco? You got any Oro Noko? Hey, Buto. You got some Orogo over there. Player, you got Oro Noko. Hey, bro, I ran out. I had two pints earlier, bro. Orenoko is a major river. Go to the liquor store. Get me some

fucking Oro Noko. Hey, dog, I'm trying to mix my Orenoko. Oro Noko flow, bro. It's a major river in northern South America, so it's way up north there in Colombia, on the border of Columbia. Yeah. Oronocco flow Oronoco flow

Now you make it Asian Oroonoco flow There's got to be an Oronoco over there Yeah But anyway, Enya was a very good She lives in a castle You don't know anything about her You've never heard of Enya in your life

She lives in a castle currently That's where she bought a castle to live in That's where she lives I mean listen to her Of course she lives in a fucking cat She can live in a condo off Barham Dude there's not a castle On planet Earth that doesn't have Orinoco

Flo. It's gotta It's built into the the fucking castle. It's the fabric of a castle. Right, you turn on the faucet, it flows, and it's pure orinoco. It's all been orinoco. Is it not pure orinoco? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you'd be delighted to know that the castle in one of our bathrooms, the shower has Orinoco flowing right out of it. On an Airbnb. I love it. Oronoko flow. Yeah. She has other songs, too. No, not really. Yeah, yeah. You wanted to the Lord of the Rings? Maybe she knows.

They all kind of sound the same. Yes. That's the best part about Enya is I used to fall asleep to her on a plain. And yeah. I like this one. You better know this song. You better like it. Yeah. Right.

This is post or nocle flow. Right? Look at this. Wimcical fantasy. Liv Tyler. Liv Tyler is my favorite Tyler. Okay. Not your favorite Tyler?

Steven? Liv. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For me it's live. I like Die. Die Tyler. Oh, you like? like die Tyler?

Die Tyler's my favorite. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, okay. The son. There's a die Tyler? No, brother. I don't know the family history. It's live Tyler, die Tyler.

Did you not catch that? Yeah, I do. Sit down. That's too crafty. I just want to say this, okay? Sometimes your jokes. Go over your head. No.

They become, what's that place called typewriter? The place where they do comedy and East Side. Dynasty Typewriter. They become East Side. Yeah, they're very East Side. Cool. That's a compliment. Yeah, it's cool. Hipser.

It's hip, it's hip. Yeah. It's hip. It's very hip. Anyway, I'm gonna, I want to show you something to just, because you know, look, first of all, I want to say thank you to the Korean community for embracing me, accepting me. When I go to a Korean restaurant without Bobby, they warm, warmly welcome me with open arms. And it's one of the most generous things in the Korean community.

Pure generosity. And I want to show my love and support for Korea, South Korea, once again, proving. how talented and cool they are. This is how they fucking train. This is how the guards train. I saw this, yeah. In that wave pool. Look at that.

I saw it. I mean, you're dead. Every other human is dead except for this cool South Korean who just, and then pops up on the ladder. I have an argument. Watch how fast he climbs. I have an argument. I have an argument. What?

Put a baby in there too. Save the baby. That's just him swimming across. Put a baby. in there's no training. There's no training. He's supposed to be saving people. Put a spinal bifida.

Oh. You know what I mean? Right. Put a crooked spine baby in that water. Something different. Right. So this doesn't prove. He can. It doesn't prove anything

because I can make across that. The fuck you can. Yes, I can't. The fuck. I cried it. It took me three weeks. Bobby? I got it.

Three weeks later I got to the other side. And then you need a rescue. You can't even swim in your own pool of coffee and T-shirts. This guy's swimming in tides that would kill any regular per that would kill a regular in a swimming pool controlled environment that would do you die in there i bet my bank account you die in there's lifeguards they're gonna save me the whole point is there there there's a lifeguards there he's the guy

training he's the guy that would save you he's in the water that's their coast guards okay not their lifeguards they're coast guards okay anyway you could make it across shout out no this is unbelievable i don't think you understand this is unbelievably hard this is unbelievably hard this is so fucking difficult what he's doing. Okay, I'll tell you what I would survive in. Anyway, shout out South Korea. Say out South Korea. No, you don't get to do it. I said it. I want to. Shout out. Why don't you tell me some tales of Australia is what I'm interested. And you barely spoke to me. You never answered multiple texts. Oh my God. You want to get into it. Yeah, go ahead. I don't want to get into it. I'd rather you do. Okay. How was the tour with Carlos?

Oh, I have my issues. Hold on a second. Let's go to your text. I also called you many times. We have evidence. We have evidence. Do the call log. bring up your call log how many times I called you No I'm going to just go to the text please Now there is There we go This is good

He'd be a good lawyer He's only angling for things That prove his case correct Here's okay August 13th Here we go Talk to your team This is partners

No that's not what he said No this is it I'm so mad at you It's unreal Mm-hmm Maybe we quit the pod is what you said on August 13. Yeah.

Then I go, what happened? Going to bed. I was going to bed. Right, right. And I go, you can't talk for one minute. And then you don't text me back for four more days. That's right. Yeah, yeah.

So how do I respond to that? Hey, man, is everything okay? What can I do? And then you continue to reach out to me. Oh, excuse me? Then you would continue to reach out to me. You stopped. I'm with Bobby on this one.

What? Yes. Yes, finally, dude. A lot of people are on my side on this one. No, they're not because they know the true story, which we can't fucking tell on the show. They'd be on my fucking team. So, good job, fancy.

Good job, fans. You want to drum up some shit? You want to drum up? But that's what I love about. You know the thing we talked about before the show? Gone. Enjoy the ride. And what I meant was absolutely Andrews.

You fucking sell out. This kid will jump so fast. Oh, he's a weasel. He's a weasel. He's a weasel. Dude. You're one of the. So I was mad at, so I had some angers toward Carlos.

Of course, it's natural. Your hair looks good. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. Tell me what's going on. What was the big right? So one, just throw it out there.

I was around the corner from him. He didn't know I was listening. He was talking shit about you. And he was talking to somebody. Who? I don't know who it was. May I finish? Sure.

See, already. Do you see what he's doing? No, it's not. Already the attitude. Well, do you see attitude? No. No. Okay.

Let's hear. Thank you. He goes, oh yeah? He's on the phone. He goes, fuck you, bitch. Oh. And you hung up. No, no, no.

And I went around the corner. I'm not done. And I looked at him, right? It's your dog sitter. Be nice. I know. And I said to him, don't talk to people like that. He doesn't say that.

What do I say? You didn't say that. You were like, what are you doing talking like that? Well, who are you talking to? What's a difference? I was trying to make a dinner reservation for you, and it was some Asian lady who could barely hear me. And then I hung up and I went,

fuck you, bitch, because I didn't want to say it to her over the phone. I just said it to her after I press. That's a tough one. It's tough? Tough water. I think you're with me again. Yeah, everybody's with you on that.

That's out of pocket, brother. That's crazy. You said F you bitch to her? No, to my phone that had no one on it. Oh, my God. That's what he said. Set it to the woman. No.

No, that's insane. No, that literally is what happened. Did you hang up on her? Then I hear him hang up, and then his excuse was, no, I had hung up earlier. How do you hear someone hang up? I hear taps. No. He does have good A.V.

Dude, I have really good AV. It's one of the best AVs in the game right now. Dude. You want to talk about fucking. You don't know about his AV, brother. There's no. What? You just have V, not A.

You want to talk about Deadpool fucking. symbiosis? Yeah, get it out. I should be allowed to have a... My point is that because you're so sensitive about cursing for... I'm daredevil, dude. I hear everything.

He doesn't want you cussing at someone because you're representing him. Exactly. Bingo. He's afraid that someone's going to go, Bobby's tour manager called... Which is exactly why I hung up. Oh, so you did hang up? Of course I did. Okay. Well, he's saying it. You don't believe it?

I'm not done. Okay. We do it. It's okay. I already advanced the rest of your show so I get paid no matter what. Yeah, he does have access to the accounts. Some good meals. Some really good meals. Did I suggest you guys in Melbourne?

Did you go to Cookie or any of those spots? I sent you a bunch of spots. No, he doesn't take what Carlos does. And it's an interesting way of tour managing, if I may. Please. Can I make his style? And it's really old school. You may.

So we show up at a spot, right? He forgets. Right. He frantically goos things I'm not done You'll go to Yelp Oh I got three stars Right

Well show up at a place And it's one of the worst restaurants We've heard of there But you know historically And we've talked about on this show Whenever I hire somebody outside of him Whenever I give food recommendations You always say I've never led you astray

You've not only dude We went to Pellegrine Lawyers guns and money I remember You went to Pellegrino 2000 Twice And that was very good. That's not his choice.

That was your choice. That was my choice in Sydney. That is true. That was my choice. Yeah. So I'm not giving him the fucking shit. So did you get to any of the places I suggested in Melbourne to take him to? No.

Oh. Why? Because I had already made reservations three months ago. For other places that aren't good. I don't Google what's bad in Melbourne. I want to take my shitty. No, you. You ask him.

He knows. Too many moving parts. I got to just do it on my own. Anyway, we went to a fusion place. Oh, yeah. He hates fusion. The Asian... Did you think it was good?

No, I didn't like it. Wait, what city was that in? Do you remember? I don't remember. It could have been Calcutta. It doesn't even matter. Is that in Australia? That's all bad.

I took him to a nice Indian place and because it wasn't an... No, no, no, no, no. That's another... Can I just say another thing? You didn't go to stalactites? You're going to make me so mad. You're going to make me so mad right now, dude. Yeah, just focus only on the negative, not all the good food you had.

Fucking bitch ass. Holy shit, dude. It's crazy to come at me. I'm going to say one thing. When Carlos arrived today, I said, like, I'm going to be so nice to Bobby. So that went right out the fucking window. Well, you lasted about, what, 15 minutes?

Yeah, I had blue chew. Oh, you're chewed up. Bob, you were fucked up to me and, yeah. Well, how can we rectify it? How do we make this better? One bullet each. He asked me at breakfast what I would do if he killed my dad, and then he got mad at me when I said I would shoot him in the head.

Why are you killing his father? Why would I say that? Why would you say that? I don't know anything about it. That's real crazy. I love his dad. Yeah, he's a very nice people. He's a surgeon.

Yeah. That has nothing to do with him being... I had Austria proosis. He fucking surgery. Oh, he did. He helped you. On Austria prosa. Okay.

Well, let's rectify this. This Australian tour I heard was good from a farm. It was very good, and we had a really good time. And me and Carlos had some good moments. We did. I just feel like I was treated unfairly for two bad restaurants out of the many that I took you to. because we weren't just there for two days. Just take Andrew's suggestion.

All right, I'll make a good suggestion if we want to move off of it. I had probably the best cheese steak I've had in Los Angeles. This is what I'm talking about. Tell me what it is. It's called Sunnis. It's on sunset.

They're a pizza joint, but they do a Wagyu cheese steak they're known for. It's Wagyu beef. It was very expensive, but remarkably worth it. I ate the whole fucking thing. Standing there, it was delicious.

It's on sunset. That's it, Sunnies. And they do pies. Pies are. only. No slices, which I respect. I like that. Haven't had the pizza yet, but click on the Wagu cheese steak. Oh my God. If you just Google

Sunny's Wagyu Cheesesteak. Is that it? That's not it. It's not it. Look at how bad that sandwich. It looks like gray meat. No, look at the, look, zoom in. Oh, is it delicious. It's garnered. That's cheeses all over. It's garnered as one of the best cheese sticks in LA.

I got to tell you. I got to try it. Big, big, big fan. Big, big fan. And also the sesame seeds on the bun. That looks like puck bug bug. That looks like Puck Puck. It's phenomenal. I'm not going to lie. Didn't need it.

It's so good. Didn't need that Puck callback. I did. I liked it. Puck Puck Puck. Yeah, yeah. Puck Puck. What's been going on with you, Puck Puck Pug?

I started school this week. No, no. Late night classes. How many years are you going to be in school? Aren't you 30? Until I guess I get a Nazar Visa. Okay. How old are you now?

23? 24, turning 25. Oh my God. Wow. 25 soon? How does it feel? Tell me about the whispers of a 25-year-old. No whispers.

At night, there's no whispers at night? It's that after 25, your knees start to hurt. Now, shut the fuck up. You don't know pain. Insane. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything hurts on my body. You don't know anything.

You don't know nothing about pain, bitch. Well, stop eating 50-week-old eggs and you might not have so much pain in your legs. Once you turn 25, your body enters a subtle state of biological aging where cellular repair metabolism, collagen production slowly begin to gradually slow down. But it's slowing down. It doesn't stop.

His is done. Yeah. It's a dead end. It's over. Dude, I'm dying. Look at me right now. Look at them. I just...

Look at... That's right. That's it. He's dying. You still look young, though. That's really nice to say. Hmm. I look pretty good.

You look good, yeah. For your age. Shut the fuck up. No, you do. You look good. You're a piece of shit. Well, for a... for a...

For a... Go ahead. Do the slam. I deserve it. No, you look at... Yellow. So, McCone... So tomorrow we're going to watch The Odyssey.

But McCone has a review of the Odyssey. Tell us about it. All right. I give it an 8 out of 10. I thought it was pretty good, but I liked how much weirder off. Andheimer was. I also thought shooting on IMAX exclusively

kind of backed him into a couple of corners where it probably would have been better if he shot some of the dialogue scene with the regular camera. But it was good. And I was glad to see it at Universal City Walk on 70mm IMAX. Where are we going tomorrow? Regal.

Downtown. Downtown. That's 70 mil. IMAX. And we have good seats? No. Yes, we do. Okay. We bought goods.

We're not like neck-cranged. I can't, I won't do that. I can't wait. Who's buying snacks? I'll buy all snacks. Can we list the snacks already? Yeah, let's list it now. I'm dreaming about it.

Yeah. Biggest bucket. Give me a Home Depot bucket of popcorn. the biggest bucket of popcorn they got I've been doing dry butter no butter this time You want to do that again? Dry butter

Not dry butter No butter Oh you're doing no butter on the popcorn Yeah it's too much Because it already hit butter on it There's just so much butter It's the kind of butter it is It's oil

You're gonna be You're gonna be pleasantly surprised I know how you mix it I never put butter on popcorn At the theater And no seasoning No no I put the shaker on Let's go to candies

Do you know why I don't eat butter on popcorn at the theater? No. Warby Parker. I'm going to tell you about Warby Parker. My wife loves these. I love the sunglasses. My wife has prescription lenses. They were able to take whatever frame she chose and pop in those because she can't see anything without them.

I love their sunglasses. I own many, many a pair. And they're fantastic. My favorite thing about Warby Parker is you can try on with their virtual try and try any glasses to see how it fits your face, no matter how fat or skinnier faces, because I got a skinny old little tiny face. They got over 300 retail stores across the United States. And also, I'm telling you, their prescription glasses start at $95.

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Just enter your information to see if you're eligible for benefits on frames, contacts, on eye exams. And if you are, they automatically apply them for you. Right now, get one pair of glasses and get 20% off additional pairs at Warbyparker.com slash bad friends. That's 20% of any additional pairs when you purchase one pair at Warby, W-A-R-B-R-B-Y, Parker.com slash bad friends. Cash App.

You know that money that you owe me with Cash App? Maybe that's the only way I take money. When you owe me something, you better pay me. I'll tell you why I'll pay you through Cash Act because it's safe. Yeah, that's right. It's got advanced built-in security that keeps your money safe and your personal info also safe. right where you need it, which is in your business, nobody else is. Keeping your money safe from fraud deserves to be a priority and Cash App treats it that way. With security lock, Cash App requires

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Download the cash app today and make your money work for you. Just visit the link in our bio. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank, banking services provided by Cash Apps Bank Partners. Visit Cash.com. com slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. Maynick! Part of the beast is the must-see adventure of the year.

It's just you and me, boy. One of the most extraordinary on-screen bronze you'll ever see. I'll get you home. Brad Pitt, Art of the Beast. September 25th. Get tickets now. I've told you this story. Freshman year of college, I got the worst food poisoning I've ever had in my entire fucking life.

And they chalked it up. We did the math. Me and my buddy Colin were pissing and shitting, puking for two full days straight. And our buddy Colorado, John, who got stoned with us and went to the movie with us, was totally fine the next day for finals. and we ate the exact same meals except John didn't eat popcorn. He just had Reese's pieces and me and Colin shared the popcorn. And the doctor goes, that's it, dude. I go, what?

He goes, it's rotten butter. You guys put rotted butter from that hot bacteria container all over. I was sicker than I've ever been. I've never put butter on popcorn since that day. Never. Jello pudding pops is my thing. What did Cosby do to you? No, no, it had nothing to do with them.

What do you mean? I was in middle school. and I had one Jello pudding pop and it gave me diarrhea. A Jello pudding pop? Yeah. There's nothing in there. I know.

That's the mystery. Is that what gave me diarrhea? I don't know, but I think it is because I've never had a jillow pudding pop. I haven't had a Jello pudding back. Maybe it was Bill Cosby on the cover. That could have freaked me out. Imagine he was trying to drug you

through Jello pudding pops and it just didn't work. Yeah. Can you imagine this guy was the spokesman for Jello? I know. I can't believe. And why do they have him? Those, by the way, those pops, have you ever had a yellow pudding pop? They're so good.

I ate a thousand of those as a kid. I can't eat those things. You don't remember those? I never had those. Did they not have those in Spain? Yellow. Yellow pudding pop. Who's the spokesperson now?

Kevin Spacey? I was waiting. Who is? Yeah. I mean, he stinks. Fuck him. Yeah, fuck that guy. He stinks.

Also, he was such a judge. You know what's so funny? A clip popped up of him talking shit to Wanda Sykes. Do you remember that during the award show? I remember that. And when he's like, Yeah, and on my show, we spoke English. Yeah.

Do you remember, you guys don't remember this? I remember that fucking clip, dude. He was, because he doesn't like abonics. He doesn't like, you know. People that, he goes, no sagging your pants. You remember that? Yeah, he was like, pull your pants up. Give me the clips of everything.

He was wearing sunglasses, I remember. Yes, there it is. Yeah. Watch what an asshole this guy is. You, you're a war. So what, was Nipsey Russell busy tonight? I love her. I love her.

You know, you got Larry Davis sit behind. You know Larry don't know what he's doing. You know that. show all improvised. Like the Cosby show, that was all scripted. Yeah, we spoke English. That's a party stopper. Yeah, bro.

What a dick. That's a party stopper. Do you know who Bill Cosby was? Was he really funny? I have to say, Bill Cosby himself, that special, is one of the funniest specials ever made. Mm.

No? Not going to get on any of that. That's not? He's a piece of shit. He is a piece of shit. I'm saying outside of the, I don't give a fuck about himself. Okay.

Fuck him for the rest of fucking time. What's your favorite candy? At the movie theater? This is a good debate because we've talked about this before but I've changed, my taste buds have changed. Because I almost exclusively used to be a bunch of crunched Reese's pieces guy.

Buncher crunch. But I gotta tell you, I'm really getting into them Sour Patch Kids, pal. You are, Paul? I love Sour Patch Kids. And I also, give me the Harrybows. Give me the little peach hairy bows. You know what you can give me?

What? Red vines. keep them. They're so boring. Thank you. You keep the fucking honey sour situation then. I didn't say honey sour. Whatever that is.

I didn't ever say honey sour sour. Whatever the honey sours. I said sour patch kids. I don't want that either. Everybody likes sour patch kids. No, fuck you. Raise your hand if you like sour patch kids. Everybody likes them.

I mentioned a fucking red vine sucks. The only thing that's good is because you. Why do people buy them? Because they feel bad for the licorice industry. Big licorice is pushing it like crazy. I'm buying some tomorrow you're having one. I'm throwing them away. I'm not kidding.

When you give them to me, I'm throwing them on the floor. I'm dumping your popcorn onto the ground. That's where it belongs. I eat the popcorn off the ground in the movie theater. All right, zoom in. Let's see what we got. What do we got here? We have a list of the regal, the lineup.

But I'll give you this. Look at me. Give me the lineup. I'll give you this. Red Vines is way better than Twizzlers. Obviously. So we got tomorrow. Thank you.

But Twizzlers nibs are better than all of them. Zoom in. Would you call me? What the fuck Did you call me, dude? Junior mince, waste a time Bunches a yes M&Ms, I'll do peanut or peanut butter

Regular M&Ms aren't even real anymore The Kit Kat minis are very, very good Reese's pieces There's your red vines Nerd clusters Nerd clusters are huge And here we go, zoom in right there They only have two kinds of sourpatch

That is not okay You've got to have more than just watermelon and regular ones On the green one underneath What does that say? Twizzlers, all American fashion That'll never go out of a side You said you like red vines Oh, that's not it

Those are two completely They're the same thing But they're two different companies I like that kind of texture You know why Starburst Didn't win this game Are they still individually packaged In that package

That's such a fool's game All right hot dog, corn dog What else? Any side chicken tenders What do they have there? No, we're going to see a movie We're not Hey you shut the fuck

What the fuck up? We're going to eat food. Are we going to the Magic Johnson Theater? I went once. We're going to go see Philadelphia. You saw it? Dude. Magic Johnson.

I know. Philadelphia, it's about AIDS. Come on. I like it. Is this bouncing all over your head? What's your problem right now? You. You.

What do you mean? Catch up. The AIDS thing. God. You said, is that where I saw it? Is that where I saw Philadelphia? Is that, do you think that's where I saw it? And when I say ketchup, you say, Buster, where are you today? Can I tell you why? Because you know that theater that has the, uh, the wind and, uh, what's it called? 40. Yeah. So if it was at, right? If you saw Philadelphia at the Magic Johnson Theater. They throw needles at you? Throw AIDS at you. Like when he's sick.

Dude, a spray. He coughs and you feel it. And you mix it with what do you call a pepper spray? So it burns a bit. You're in the theater. Hey, everybody. Welcome to the Magic Johnson Theater here in South Central Los Angeles. This is a fully immersive show.

Just so you know, please enjoy the film. 127 running minutes. Exits are here, here, and you're all going to get AIDS. It's terrible, dude. All right, zoom down. Okay. Wait, go back. It's hot food.

Bob? Churros. Okay, so we have to get churros. Oh, do they have Orinoco there? Oh, they do with the flow. Call back. Yeah, flow. Nathan's hot dog and fries might be good.

You know what we should do. At baseball games, they do a nine, nine beers, nine hot dogs and nine innings. Can we do nine Nathan hot dogs, nine Coca-Cola's throughout the course of the film? Do you think you need nine dogs? I don't want to. Let's try. Let's die. Anyway, I can't wait to see your opinion about it

I'm excited to not go If you don't go There's going to be problems Name them Yeah, I sure Double dog dare you I double dog dare you right now I'm gonna tell you what they are right now

Right Number one, I'll be very disappointed in you Okay dude Welcome Oh yeah Welcome to feeling Oh you want to get into feelings And I know what you're doing right now

You're searching for something else to say No I'm not When I get emotional I use my hands and I use vocal inflection Hip hop Bob is about to come out Yo, walt saw bunch shit

West Side big boy Big Daddy in the house Of course I'm gonna go I'm very excited Cleared my day I can't wait I'm very excited to go See it with the family

I'm a liar I was over there I was over there waiting for you guys If no one showed up I saw you waited Andrew's gonna be right on time And if he doesn't make the first five minutes of the movie

He's gonna stress Bob out There's the theater Who? Jules. Because the first five, it's confusing. You gotta get in the first five minutes of the before. You can't miss them again. You can't miss it.

There's 20 minutes of commercial, so we're good. It's like the oldest story ever told me. He really doesn't know anything about it. Three thousand years of spoilers. Who spoke? The joke, the joke he got mad at you do it? The call back, call back. Cancey's always a little more whimsical outside.

outside of the studio he dances a little bit more let me tell you something to make you happy i was reading the comments about your hair cut and everybody thinks that you look very handsome pen yon that's it there's no pound pound intended Dude, this is our last movie together. Dude, this is our last movie together, dude. This is our first movie together. I know.

I know it is. What about Andrew? Andrew loves crunch a bunch. One for him, one for me. Do you want one? Crunch a bunch? A bunch of cruncher bunch of cruncher bunch of crunches. They're getting a bunch of cruncher bunch.

If it does, if it does, I'm done. We're done. But Francis is over today. It might be the last episode. Because I've already seen it. We've all already seen it. I've never thought that. Oh, it's real good.

Let's go, dude. So when I beat him in Uno. By the way, which I did twice. Let's go. They were fair game. Hey. Hi. How are you?

Hi. Hi. Good to you. I just showed you, right? Yeah. Nothing. Okay, good. I like to share.

Just a die. What number is it? Fancy's got it. What the number? G13 to G20. G13 to G20. G13 to G20. I can't believe her hair.

I barely fucking made it. Why? Because I was, I had something else to do. There's just one. There's just one. Fancy got me. Punch was my favorite. Sour past shit.

And popcorn without butter. Unlike the... Without butter. Without butter. Butter. I slept here almost every single scene. I slept. I was so tired.

I woke up just... You know what? Forget it. I woke up at the berry. Forget. Forget it. We're never doing this. again. It's a waste of money, time, love, anything. Fuck you. You know, actually, I was awake

all the time. You know who wasn't awake the whole time? I know. He fell asleep. It was good. I only had one problem with it. Helen. You know who it was. The casting. I know how it was. There's a I guess it, man. You got to get with the Korean on the boat? How come you didn't get that? That's you. I just wouldn't survive in that world. Either would do.

Of all people that would have, of all, yeah, he died. Of all people that would be suckers. You're in that cheese curd with the Cyclops cave. I am the psychos. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you're a cheese cur. I'm crazy with that guy, though. Incredible.

Of all the guys that would be succumb to the Swan Song, it would be you. That's a metaphor for your whole life. Siren song? Yeah. It's not a siren song. That's you. Oh yeah. I wanted to hear it.

Good look, look. See? They're pretty good out. They could have easily cut out an hour. No. 100%. There's moments there. No, I love it.

This is you in the end. That's 100. You laid that. The first one hoodie. You'd be the first guy to lay down. No, I'll be the last guy to go. You'd be the first guy. Everyone was doing out.

And they're like, all right. No, you would do it right away. You'd do it right away. You'd be the first guy to lay down. The cop's really the way they designed them. It's like a crooked... You mean, that's a real guy? That's not a real guy?

That's a door guy at the comedy store. I've seen that kid before. I feel like I've seen that guy before at the comedy store. I think he parked my car last night. What did you think of robber? Patinson? I love to watch him die. I love that.

I love that. I turned a fancy animal. Like, fuck yeah. When he was like just, I want, you want us all to die? Just you. Oh, bro. Damon! Damon's the God.

He's an evil original. Yeah, and he's like, and he's a pussy. I love that he's like such a weakling and he's commanding everyone to do his deed. Oh, I'm so great, dude. What? I was pointing to pussy weakly. Yeah, you're the wrong with Patton. You're that character, not the actor.

You're that type of person. Not that. I'll take it. Yeah. I'm Odysse. I'm Odysseus. Brother. No chance.

No, you're not. Odysseus would never sit like this. Look, look. Watch, watch. Odysseus would never sit like that. Can you imagine, you two rows, you'd be like, ah. Do it.

I'm so strong, I'm home. Like two. What? Home. I tell you what would happen. You for sure would go into the whirlpool. You'd be like, let's go in. Right straight.

Oh, go, right. You know how he did that? How he did what? The World Pool. CGI. He took, this is true. He took, um, with the water, jet skis. And he made the circles.

That's enhanced for sure. Yeah. So the reason why you back out. I know. It's a conference. So he did it so that it gives the actors reference point. And he filled out the sentence. I mean, how did they do that one with a,

um, yeah. How do you the, uh, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the. Bobby was there. Did you get that? That's on the rubber. I don't want the rover. Brick his neck.

HR. Brick his head. That's so funny. It's very dark. So, in the Philippines, they didn't have any light on, there was no light. The video quality was not very good.

So she was in 70 millimeter. No, she played like six parts of the Philippian version. They do it live. She could play Odysseusian. Odysseus, Penelope. I played all of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you've never seen it.

No. Did you like it or no? I really liked it. I wasn't bored at all. All the way, you liked all. Three hours, you don't, you're not bored of it. Okay, and then also this, all this fucking hype. Oh my God.

All this fucking hype. Travis Scott. Yeah. Unbelievable useless character. Could have been literally anybody. It's the point that you is. No, no, no. He did it because it's a culture.

He's a poet. He's a poet. That could have been literally any, Can you sing any Travis Scott songs? It's all right. And then it's like, and then, and then, and then the people come in. They trample everyone to death. Not 10.

You know that stuff? You know that. You know that. Oh, a lot of it. So is Mia Goth. A lot of the roles could have been like, oh, anyone could be this. What did I say? That me a got girl, I go, could have been anybody.

Yeah. Where are her eyebrows? Where are they? My dad. I hear my dad. Where are her eyebrows? How do you? I like, I'm telling you, Matt Damon, first of all.

Matt said to be masterpieces. Matt Damon? Home run. Even Pattinson, so good. Tom Holland? Yeah, yeah. Not good, good. Not good, it's true.

She agreed. Everyone agrees. Ann Hathaway? She's incredible. But also, also, put them undone by a lot of good actors. Ammo should win, should win. They won't give it to them, they'll give it to Damon. Because it's Matt's

film. I'll tell you the most underwhelming. Underwhelming. I'll tell you. Charlie Sterro's in here. Well, let's be honest. She kind of, she like trapped him as a sex slave and fed him lotuses. That's like it? She's just seen him.

I know, but I'm saying, no, but it doesn't tell, it just is like a, it's a speed bump in his life where you're like, It's how he told the story. She's just not, she's not, she's not, no, she's a good actress, but that chunk of time is a little meaningless to me. It just spent more time away from his kingdom. But she also, I wish she, like, fucked with his head or did something, like, I wish she physically did something to him instead of just feeding him.

What he did, he combined both. There's two different stories going on, right? There's a group of people that get lotus flower, the lotus, I know. The lower flower eater is right. And her, and he somehow combined with the dew. No, it's good. She kept him, she kept him subdued so she could use him for whatever she wanted. Maybe he's got it off him for a patio.

No. No, thank you. Give him a fucking kiss. I'm like, why is that a big deal? Like, not, you know. They were actually not for you. Those pants are both. For our pantry.

You gave me these. I almost asked for those specifically and you stole them. All right. Carlos those were your pants in Australia Andrew you're a nice guy man those are for you those aren't your pants Okay, don't take them off right now. What? Don't take them off right now. Why not? Because my girlfriend's here so what? Oh, jealous? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, let me see his yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't take it off. It's illegal, but those do fit nice. You should give him to Carlos. Oh, his butt looks good. I'm sorry sorry about this yeah are you guys going to Pizier or Bianca or no

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And for a limited time, get 40% off your first order, plus a free item in every box for life with our code. Bad friends. I'm going to say something too if we're in the food world and we're moving away from the movie theater it's about time I know I've waited long enough

we finally bought an air fryer Oh my God how was it? It's amazing, is it not? I mean they are life changing I guess I guess I didn't know what I was doing What are you frying up out? You can do literally anything I know I have air friar

Okay are you using it? No but I've fried some things up What have you fried in it? Chicken tenders Chicken and it is phenomenal That's it that's all you've done yeah but it's so good i put little seasoning have you ever put bacon in the air fryer it's remarkable what does it do it's perfect it's exactly how i like it i don't even know how they

is someone in there yeah i open it up i go somebody in there yeah i want someone to go yeah kebler we're here kebler elf just one little elf yeah we're here the tree was cradded imagine imagine i'm not done oh sorry the tree was cradded and the fudge stripes i don't I'm done with that lifestyle. I think you were. That's good. Good finish, right? And you got it out.

I got it out. Yeah, you did. I did. Yeah, yeah. Hey, what's the biggest thing you've snuck into a movie theater back when you used to sneak in food and stuff? Weed.

You can't smoke in the movie theater? Yeah, he can. Oh, pig. Let's associate the junkie with the film. If you did bring in... Oh, yeah, yeah. If you did... If you brought in fentanyl, what movies...

I'll tell you what movie I saw. What? See if I saw it. Ready? What? Eh, man. I just saw Wuthering eyes. man?

Withering heights. What drug are you on? What drug are you on? All of them. Now, should we try the bit again? Yeah, go again. Hey, man. Hey, man.

I just got out of Wuthering Heights. Oh, what drug are you on? There ain't no drugs. Funny. Zero for two, bud. Is that good? No. Damn it.

Not even a foul tip. That's not even a foul tip. That's, give me another. Give me another one. Give me another one. Hey, man. Is it that? I think it's, I think it's you.

I'm off today. No, you're on. You're throwing yourself with the A man. Hey! Don't do the A! Oh, that's the problem. That's what I'm saying. Oh, so don't do it.

Because that character doesn't know what you is. Yo! Is that better? Yo, what's it? What movie did you go see? Wuther and Heights. What, are you on something? Yeah, I am, my friend.

PCP. Oh. Yeah, I ran through the wall. I didn't even pay for it. You did? Yeah. Well, you're under arrest. You're under arrest.

Why, man? See, the man. Yeah, all right. It was really good. See, I liked it. Every choice I make today is not good. No, no, no, I liked it. The gang liked it.

Did you like it? The gang liked it. Yeah. Are we good now or what? You and me? Yeah. I think it was a lot. We were just around each other.

A lot. I think it was, I got it from both sides. I heard both sides of the story. Yeah. And both sides of the story. Well, you know, you live your life. Maybe international is not for you. I don't think it is.

But at 255 in Hawaii, unfortunately you're going to be there. I wish I could be there. I'll be in Atlanta. Adam will be there. Adam, Egett? Ray. Oh.

He's there playing the blue note. Oh, he is? In Honolulu? Yeah. And you're going to be, but you're playing a theater there, right? Yeah. It's same area?

Yeah. Same night. No, he's there a couple of days earlier, before a show and I'm there the night before I leave he'll be here. Oh, it's awesome. You can have dinner. I just saw his wife with you. They're prego-wego.

They're going to have a little baby. I'm very happy for him. Are you? Do you want a baby? Yeah. You know what I'm going to give you a baby? You'll give me one? You want to make a baby?

Have a baby? Do you have a baby with me? Do you have a baby? This is fucking kid. I know, but she's ungrateful. You're not? He's sweet to, um, I think I'll lie. I don't know how many times we've talked about that.

That's fine. Move out. Let's move out. No, move out. I'm saying move out. You're happy to live with me as long as you want. Yeah. It's beautiful.

He's happy that my mom is back, though. Yeah, she's back. It's just she's coming tomorrow. Yeah. She's got, maybe she'll be my date to the movies. Yeah. The deep cleaning on your mother. Because your mom still has a crush on me?

Yeah. Awesome. No, she doesn't. Yeah, she does. Yeah, she does, dude. She said it on this show. I think she does. Yeah, dude, the fans shipped us.

They want us to be together. Can you imagine her rubbing her? We're going to blow up our lives and be together. What? For some reason, she likes your arms. She keeps a day about your arms. I'm a big fan of her mom. She's coming to the movie theater.

Make sure we sit together. She's the best. She's the best, yeah. So she's going to come with us tomorrow. You're going to be there. Yeah. Have you already seen the movie? No.

Oh, so me and her are the only ones that haven't seen it. I haven't seen you in a long time. I know. You've been gone. I've been missing you in the comedy store, has been missing you. everyone's asking about you. Yeah, I'm not doing that anymore.

You're not going to the comedy store anymore? No. What does that even mean? What does it sound like? It sounds like a lie. I know you're going to go back to the comedy store. What are you saying? I'm not twing.

Can I just be articulate in front of you? I wish you would. Both of you. You and him. I mean, can somebody articulate in this room? What I'm doing is, depending on what the response of my act, is on Hulu.

On your special. On my special. Yeah. Right. On Hulu. So stupid. Hulu. Anyway, it's just all based on that.

What does that mean? You're going to retire if you don't. If people are like, that's the worst special I've ever seen, I might not be able to do it. Continue. So you're just like making this fake scenario up? You got to, with everything that happens, you've got to look at the negative side of it so you can prepare yourself.

Good perspective. So go into it with negative expectation. Everything I do. So then you hope, so then if it does well, you're, and then you won't even be happy if it does well because you wanted it to do poorly. No, I wanted to do well. It doesn't sound like it.

Okay, you're saying that should be more positive. Of course. You put a lot of effort and work in years into it. Ask me again. How do you think your Hulu special is gonna be? It's gonna be exceptional beyond measure. Does I feel better? Yeah.

Okay. One of the greatest fucking specials ever. Does that Tony? Yeah. Yeah, I love him. He does that. He does that one of the greatest comedians alive. He'll say that.

He'll bring you up when you do the show and he'll celebrate your special because it will be amazing. It's a great special. It's great. I watched it. Go. To the taping.

I saw you do it 50. I know, but you never saw it. I'm going to watch it on. I know, but my point is, is that how do you know if it's good if you haven't seen it. I've seen the performance. What do you change?

I know, but we don't know, though. You know what? Sorry, since 2000. Right after the second plane hit, I saw the act. I saw it live at the comedy store, and I told you how great it was. I said that to your face. And we were back in the green room with your...

I'm taking a break right now. I'm going to take a little break. So I haven't been going to the store. You know what I mean? I just been localized. You know, I've been... Everything is... You just got back into town from Australia

three days ago. What are you talking about? It's not like you're not been around. You literally haven't been in the country. I understand that, but since I've been here, it's been very localized. Dude, what are you talking about?

I'm telling you. You haven't been in three days. I've been in town for a couple days, and my joy has been very localized to my own home. You stay in the house. Yeah. And I've been doing my own routines,

swimming a lot, sometimes six times a day. That's crazy. He's swimming six times a day Yeah, I just go out And then he's just there Like lying on the Floating six times a day He meant what can it be swimming?

Do you remember the South Korean guy That we showed you 20 minutes ago? I don't see you moving Yeah Floating swimming I'm in the water They're two totally different things Correct

Okay anyway When someone says That's like Bob is like I went running today And he just stands outside It's not the same thing dude You weren't swimming

Swimming is active. You float. And by the way, floating is great. You're a float. I weighed. We were talking about this. I don't want to talk about swimming. I'm just telling you my localized routines.

Okay. Because you're so confused by it. Everyone was on the same page. Okay. You're confused by verbiage. I've always been. That's always been a hurdle for me, verbiage. But, you know, I've been doing it.

I've been getting around it. I know you go around the hurdles. I do. And I'm still going to win. Oh, you get penalized, though. It doesn't matter. I guess it doesn't. Yeah.

I went down sunset last night because I did a show at the Palladium. With who? Sarah Mello put it together. It was incredible. It was the only white comic on the show. And Donnell brought me up. Donnell was saying bad stuff about you.

What was he saying? You know. No, what was he saying? Because I'm tired of that fucking guy. He was cussing you out. That's all he does. No, I'm being real? That's all he does.

I can call that little fucking guy. Call him. fucking guy I was only white comic Are you being real If he was not talking shit I don't want to call And he brought me up by saying

This next comedy The most crackery cracker ass Does a podcast With the little Shicey Chinese bitch ass Yeah he just shit on us For the first I don't know

Five minutes But it was great I know of his number Donnell Yeah Yeah you do I know I don't know where it

You don't want to call him You don't know where it is It's under Donnell How do you spell it? Oh that's what this is Yeah He just puts him black guy number three.

Dona, D, O, N, N, E. It's not in here. Oh, maybe you don't have his number. I don't answer. Oh, yeah, I see that guy. Do you have any don't answers on your phone? No, I just won't answer if they call. No, he's saying, do you have them saved as don't answer?

No. I have a bunch of numbers saved in my phone that just says don't answer. He's got to remind himself not to answer. Because he might just go. So it pops up and says don't answer, I wouldn't answer it. But isn't it tempting? Sometimes I don't want to. Right.

But if it's just don't answer, that it could be anybody. Right. Girls? Yeah. I mean, it could be anybody from my past. Yeah, coming back into your life again. Why don't you just get a new number?

I don't want to. Because people from my past have it. And you don't want those people according to what you just have. Some people I do. Right. Yeah. Have any of those people that you do from your past from not to call you? They never call me.

They never call me. So people from my past, right, they don't call me. And the ones that I don't want to talk to or don't answer on my phone. Well, it's kind of like when you give a text, you get a text once a year, and you say happy birthday to somebody and you look at the past text and that's all you've said to each other is happy birthday

and you're like well that's that I don't think we should do this anymore Yeah I think it's bold I've acknowledged it to a future to someone I've gone hey man I see what we've done here I think we're done here Okay let me ask you this

Because it was literally happy birthday to me Happy birthday to him Happy birthday to me? I was like that's it We did it over how long a decade Honestly it had been four years I was like this is insane I don't even know why we're doing that's insane We just saw it

Somebody has to stop it I quit it I said I'm sorry Yeah you yeah Let me ask you this And now we're hanging out How does that work? I said, let's get coffee. That's, it does work.

Yeah, you sometimes got to crack it. Happy birthday, okay, that's good. So, let me say, ask you something. Ask away. It's my girlfriend's birthday. Today? No, next week. Okay.

Coming up. Okay. So last year, a pony. I'd never thought of it. Get her a pony. I don't even know where to get one. What? She's got to know.

Why me? Shut up, Pog. You know where I get a pony. Yeah. Get him a pony. Yeah, if you want to eat one, she can get one. Right. Yeah, yeah.

No, but, so I last year, I'll tell you what I got last year. $20,000 for a pony. That's how much they cost. We got to go to Bakersfield. Yeah, I'm not doing that. 20 grand? That's what a pony is? That's good.

Is that good money? I don't, I think that's crazy expensive. I thought a pony would be like $5,000. What kind of pony are getting? Oh, you're a big pony guy? Yeah. You know about ponies? Yeah, yeah.

Icelandic ponies are fucking 30 grand. What I did, was I went to a bookstore and I bought a guest gift certificate. I just like, that's for her birthday? That's awful, dude. It's not because it's like, get whatever books you want.

No, do you have to make something special? You know what? It's not about buying something. Take her somewhere cool. I asked her already. Why don't you DM Daniel Radcliffe and see if he'll meet her in real life? I don't even have Donnell's number.

I said DM. D. I don't even have, yeah, I can't do it. Hit him up on Instagram. I bet you he'd be like, yeah. And do what? Come over to the birthday party? Yeah, wouldn't it be right?

He'll never show up. No, we're not with that attitude. Okay. Her favorite book series right now is Akatar, so you could do buy like a good hardcover. Does she need a new cauldron or something? No. Oh, that's true.

Doesn't she need something in that witch world? Yeah. I mean, I'm being serious. Like, doesn't she need something? Tode feet. Can I get Toad Feet? Can we buy some Toad Feet on there? Yeah, I need Toad Feet. I mean, what would in witchcraft?

I don't know what we just want. Is there not a shrunk? Is there a sharper image for witches? Get her a new broom. Oh, some like crystals. Crystals, yes. Beeswax and spell candles. Ritual knife. Dude, why don't you go to that store that you and I went to on MAG that's like, does, it has witchcraft stuff?

We went to it together. Remember we won't, I bought a poster from there? Where? I'll tell you, I'll tell you off the air. Okay. It's got all this shit. It's too late. I got the gift because I've got it.

Just go tomorrow. I already got it. That's so bored. That is so fucking. I couldn't agree more. You're such a romantic. You're such a romantic. I'm very romantic.

What do you think he should get her, Rudy? I'm trying to think. What would you want for your birthday? Your birthday's coming up. What do you want for your birthday? Do you want anything? I'm taking her to Hawaii. That's not a thing.

That's not a thing. That's not a thing. It's not for her birthday. Yes, it is. What can I go? And this is a part of it too. It's for, it's your going. I know.

I'm going, you want paradise love? You want paradise perfection? You go to Hawaii with me. That's free. So she gets to be a plus one to your thing for her birthday. I'll attach it to Hawaii. I'll attach other events too. What would you like for your birthday?

Food. See, that's, I know. I'm serious. What do you want? I'll buy it. She's not going to get it for you. I'll get whatever it is. Okay.

It's not, I hope it's not a car. Give me like something reasonable and I'll buy it for you. Right now all I'm thinking, is Prince Street pizza. I'll buy that. I'll get her. I'll have to buy her a Prince Street. Get her.

The whole street. Yeah. I'll get you pizza. You don't want anything. You don't do you not. She doesn't want anything. She doesn't know about fashion or socks. I'm not asking about that.

Do you want, is there something that you've had your eye on that's too expensive for you to? You need more slippers? Rocks. Filipinos are the best. What is that? Cinellas? Chinela.

Oranocoflo. Oronoko flow. Jeannie, Achijini, et's a... So you have indoor slip-ons and outdoor slip-ons. I have no idea of playing. Oh, an indoor slippers. Indoor slippers, yeah. That's what you want.

We'll get you indoor slippers. What do you want for your birthday? Nothing. Good. This is the year. I'm free of it. I got you some. I'm free of institutions.

I got you some. I'm free of dates and holidays. Every day is a holiday for me. So calendar means nothing. It means nothing to me now. Today is my birthday. Good for you. Happy birthday

Happy birthday Google as I saw this recently Somebody said that there was a I don't know what year this was It was hundreds of years ago In the calendar We just skipped from like the fourth To the 13th or something like that

And there was a re like a king did it And he fucked up everything In perpetuity for the rest of time Because he just was like Nah tomorrow's the 12th Calendar first skip days In 1882 and Catholic countries Drop 10 days to transition

From the Julian to the Gregorian calendar the old Julian calendar miscalculated the solar years by 11 minutes causing it to drift Pope Gregory that's who did it realign the calendar so he switched did you like that what when he did that I mean I thought it was a bold move yeah but what were you feeling at the time I'm I'm behind Mr. the Pope I mean the King Gregory at all I know because you used to have that tattoo he got removed oh the Pope gee yeah yeah well I mean he's turned out to be not so good of a guy But that's later March later

Much later 100 years later Yeah Russia waited Until 19 18 To skip 13 days I love how Russia Just held out

No we won't They don't They don't Just please when you do it It's easier for everybody No we will know They held out for 19 years No they held out till

1918 That's what I meant 1918 That's just nerd talk You don't like it I don't like it either I said you don't like I'm interested in shit

Like I I know you do Boggles my mind I love it Tell me more What else do you want to About time changes and I can tell you this

And time to zones There it is 1582 That's it October 4th to the 15th So that fucks me up because my birthday is October 16th So what is actually my birthday? Does it not even exist? It doesn't exist My buddy's little sister is born on a leap year

She's like whatever 12 But she's actually 35 I never knew about that fact Thank you so much for sharing that You're welcome Yeah yeah give me a fact The Aztecs had greater sewage system than all the European countries, so they were very clean and you guys were very dirty. By the way, I like how you pointed at me as if you came from a...

You still poop outside. Don't point at me, pal. You got to poop hot. Inside pooper, then. Yeah, I poop inside. You told me about you guys dig a hole to poop today. Yeah, but I don't litter. I don't litter.

What the fuck is that at the... What the fuck are you talking about? talking about my friend. I don't litter either. He hasn't littered his life, woman. No, that's not true. One time I threw something out of a car and a Native American was there and I hit him and he was crying. That's a funny joke. One tear? One tear. One tear. There's literally nobody old enough listening to the show to understand. I know. We're so old. You know about that ad? Of course she doesn't know about that commercial. That guy was Italian. Yeah, we played it off. Yeah, he wasn't Italian. We talked about it. Of course. McCone, give us some insight about what's

going on in your little world? I got a ticket when I was in Rome after being there for me 90. Bobby, this guy has not been present for Whiskey Ginger or this show for multiple months. How does he have the finances

to go to Rome? I'm going to ask you that. I'm no idea. No clue. I wasn't financing shit. I didn't for dinners. Yeah. That's what that money was for. I made it last room. Not Rome. I was only there for 10 days. Rome?

Only for 10 days? Rome? Rome? There is a Starbucks in Rome. Oh, there is? Yeah, I know. I was only there for like a week, but it was just so having to be when a lot of episodes were recorded. But it's impossible to schedule.

Yeah, you're fired. That far ahead. You're fired, dude. What did you do? You got a ticket to do what in Rome? Doing what? No, I got a ticket after being in Rome for an hour and a half because I was on a lime scooter without a helmet on.

Very gangster. And it's apparently a very punishable offense. It's like that in... There is the Coliseum and there are the Lime Scooters to go through the Galicium for you. That's insane. Lime scooters are by the Coliseum. We're fucked.

In Australia they have it, New Zealand, all helmets on the Lime scooters. But they don't give you one. It's a bullshit thing. No, they do give it to you in Austin. It's strapped to the thing. It's strapped to the thing. Yeah.

Well, also, I'm not putting that on. I'm not putting somebody's head lice on my phone. I'm never putting on one of those fucking things. You jammed it in your big ass fucking ass. You're Midwestern, big leg, big dumpy fucking ass. He's got a big dumpster. Dumpster behind there. Okay, so it's 50 euro fine.

Stuck it in there. Is that what you paid? 50 euros for the helmet ticket? What? Imagine. He's got a warrant for his arrest in Rome. I called my buddy Pietro from Italy. Oh my God.

They give you a ticket, so don't pay you. No, they got mad because I didn't know what they were saying. They were speaking Italian. They just got me and the Syrian guy, and I called Pietro because I didn't know what they were saying. And they got really frustrated that I called somebody. And I said he was my lawyer and they made me hang up the phone. Because I didn't know the rights.

Oh, yeah. They don't like lawyers down there. You fled the kids. country. I hope you have a warrant for your arrest. I was only in Rome for like literally like eight hours. Any ladies? I'm sure there was. No. I did. I was at a wedding and I had a crush on one of the one of the no was a lie. It's a lie. We know look look and then the head shake the little and the blushing. What's a blushing about, Chachi? I wish. What's the blushing about Chachi? What is it, Chach? I had a crush on one of the bridesmaids. Oh really? Pocahontas.

More, more, more. Yeah, uh? He's closer to John, but I get it. Yeah. Hey, what's up? Bridesmaids in Who's wedding? Your buddy's wedding? Right, and what fucking friend of his gets married in in Italy?

Insane. No, they were married in Bristol, England. What are you going to do with this lady? Rub your vagina against hers? You fucking pussy? Two for two. Hey, you had a crush on this girl? Did you flirt with her?

Yeah, no, we were talking. We were having a good time because there wasn't a lot of single people at this wedding. So I was talking. Or other men for her to talk to. I imagine. Exactly. So the cards were in my favor. Right. So you did card tricks for her? I was doing the behind the ear. You know this idiot. Yeah. Do you like magic? Oh no. You're not one of those guys, are you? I was with Spencer the other. You've never done magic in front of us. How do you know magic? He did it. He's Mr. Magic. He knows how much magic do you know. I know very limited magic. This is how he's getting

laid now. He's doing magic for girl. Doing magic. Come over to do magic. I'll tell you if it's magic or not. He's doing magic for chicks. I know magicians. If a guy did magic, to you at a party. Would that, would that be a turn off? Yeah, I would hide. Yeah, see? Exactly. Here's the magician now. No, no, stop. I saw the pen from over there. You know what's coming. That's aggressive, man. I saw the pen from over there. He didn't even bother to hide the pen. You knew it was coming. And he stuck up on my ear. That's not magic. That was a salt. Yeah. I'm not that good. I only, like, I can only do it. How many does have these words? It, that's not a thing. How blacked out to the girls need to be for you to do that kind of magic?

That's not magic. The behind the ear trick is 100% Yeah, you're supposed to bring it out of nowhere I saw the pen coming in This isn't fair Hey hey, hey, hey, magician's code Don't yell

Yeah Oh, he's still yelling You're not a magician You're not a magician, dude All right, so you talk to the You talk to this girl I can't believe that was it This is what he did

I couldn't, your ears not exposed Is that? Oh, water I only know that ear trick in your ear ta-da! Hey, ta-da! Ta-da!

You fuck. I don't know it that well. It's not magic. Fuck you. I'm tired of your shit. You're fired. I'm done with you. You don't show up.

You're on Rome. You're getting no scooter helmet. Okay? Nothing. No pussy, nothing. All right? You're taking our valuable money. Going to robe and fucking representing us through

garbage. Through garbage. Okay. Pog Pog. Right, through Pog Pog. So what I'm saying to you right now is represent us correctly. All right. With your hips high and your head low.

He does have big hips. What did you say to the girl? I was talking to her and then her friend and then her friend's boyfriend and then me and the boyfriend were talking and the girls were talking and she was like, just feel so lonely at this wedding. Oh. That's an opening. Did you not close it?

But then the friend, I overheard the friend say, what about McCone? And then I heard and I kind of looked over. over and she looked over at me and just went, no. No. No. Ooh, that seems brutal. He bobbed away as. You bobbed away?

Yeah. I walked around the castle and looked at the stars. All right, you say that to him. I want to see what his face is like. What about him go? About who? Oh. No.

Yeah. I mean, he's nice. Nah. He's fine. He's not fine. Have you seen him dance? He is a bad dancer. Yeah.

Did you dance by yourself? No, I don't like. Dancing a whip my son. Why does he, she have Kathy Bates' legs? Like the exact for misery. The same hips and legs. Like how does that happen? On a male.

His whole leg is a canckel. It's incredible. How does it float like that? His thigh is the same size as his ankle. It's wild. We're built tough in the Midwest. No, it's like. It's just like two trees he walked around up.

It's so weird. It's like the Michelin Man. He is the Michelin Man. Just balby white fat. Bly white fat. Grip off those fucking sticks. Yeah. He calls legs.

Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, no, I don't want to date him. Yeah, me either. Long story short. No. Well, congrats to your friend that got married or whatever. Rudy, do you have any parting words?

Thank you for being a bad friend. Fair. That'll do. Beast is the must-see adventure of the year. It's just you and me, boy. One of the most extraordinary on-screen bronze you'll ever see. I'll get you home. Brad Pitt, Art of the Beast.

September 25th. Get tickets now.