Bad Friends - You're A Good Boy, Bobby Lee!

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Starting point is 00:00:38 turned out to these. If you're not, you're not cool if you don't have one. You're not cool if you don't have one. We're back to the old school the OG our OG faces on here It says bad friends on the back the back to show them what it looks like on the back the shirts are so high quality These are so comfortable. Oh look at that dude the OG is back. Go to bad friends merch.com bad friends merch.com Oh my god, an Asian dealer. YouTube are disgusting. Oh, YouTube are something. For bad friends. First of all, I have to say some great things have happened

Starting point is 00:01:13 in the last week. And when I wanna say is what's happened. Congress is back in session. They've been in session. You what? It's great when they are. It's great when they are, because I want them to keep going. Why are you doing political?

Starting point is 00:01:27 No, I'm just telling you what the good things are happening this last week. What's good about that? Who cares? I couldn't think of something good, so I just said that. Yeah, the lizard people were back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The lizard people are back licking each other.

Starting point is 00:01:37 Oh, the strike is over. What strike? Didn't weren't we in one? The actor's strike? Yeah. It's over. It's over, man. It's open out there every day. No, don't you you buy yourself and I should have said something I drove by you there

Starting point is 00:01:48 They're you're by yourself. I've been sitting out there at Paramount. It's so sad. What is your sign say? What I Moond like four executives today. Yeah What is my sign say bring back two and a half men? Elsa says red lives matter. I don't know what that means Red I said red life matters. Oh, red life matters. I was attacked by a security guard outside of Warner Brothers. Anyway, it was racially charged. Yeah. There's no doubt in my mind. What's else is going on this last week?

Starting point is 00:02:12 What, um, this week was huge. I just got back from Vegas. Yeah, you did, right? Vegas was in. Hey, dude, can I just say this? That video you had with Bert and at that party. Sucking on his titties. Was it the best party?

Starting point is 00:02:24 Sucking on your titties? Like you want him calling it. Yeah, peaches. Do I lover and also, you know, it's That party I'll never be invited to This is the my favorite. I love it. This is my favorite. I want to be a part of the I'm gonna Tim Dylan's party Sunday you gonna go. Yeah, I'm going let's go. I'm going. I'm going. What else happened hold on? I need to be a lot of butterflies hatched this week. Where?

Starting point is 00:02:48 From cocoons. I need to call. It's like a Hollywood thing. I need to call someone. Uh oh. I need to call someone. I know people I can call to then. It's not competition.

Starting point is 00:02:59 Yeah, I have cool people I can call. No. Yeah, I want to call someone cool too. I have someone cool too. Yeah, that would, it just made me mad because what you just said was such a like can call. No. Yeah, I want to call somebody cool, too. I have someone cool, too. Yeah. It just made me mad because what you just said was such a like, you're called to your day. Yeah, who said that? Who you calling?

Starting point is 00:03:10 I was calling Leanne, Christchurch, because I literally said, I literally said at the party, I go, I go, Bobby would love this. This is so fun. And then, and she goes, she goes, yeah, he got all upset about the birth, you know, the, he got all upset about the birth, you know, they offered you to go on the tour or something like that and you're like saying

Starting point is 00:03:28 you never get invited. If you get invited and stuff all the time, you just say no. You have a no means yes, it might. Not to people in the business, no means no. No, no means yes for me, dude. No is no. Yeah, Bobby, no never in this. What no means no?

Starting point is 00:03:42 No, no, no. But I'm just saying me personally, no means yes. Ah. Anyway. And no, no, never in this. What? No means no? No, no, no, no. But I'm just saying me personally, no means yes. Ah, anyway, and no, no. And forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget it, forget like holding down the fort. A guy. If Bird ever leaves her, I'm gonna slide in. You're gonna slide in on Leanne. Yeah. You think you're... She's motherly, dude. Well, yeah, she's a... Nurged string mother, she's cool, house is clean,

Starting point is 00:04:11 house is beautiful. Yeah. Leanne Lee. Leanne Lee, Bird, watch out, dog. It's just me, Leanne Lee. Yeah. What if she would have a Southern and Asian accent? She's like, it's just me, Leanne Lee. What do the Southern and Asian accent. She's like, it's just me, Leanne. Le.

Starting point is 00:04:25 What do the Southern and Asian accent? What show man? Okay, you can't do an Asian and Southern at the same time? So hard to do. Hey, how are man? I don't, Chang willions man. Chang willions man. Yes, from the deepest south.

Starting point is 00:04:42 I feel a deepest out of them. Y'all wanna go to crack? You are a barrel. Let's go to Cracker Barrel. That's it. You just need it. You just need it. What else happened this week?

Starting point is 00:04:52 Oh yeah! What? No, nothing else. Oh yeah. Nothing really important. JetSki got passed at the comedy store. Let's give it up for the big Jetski. You know, we were there at your showcase.

Starting point is 00:05:08 We were there. We were there. You told us to leave. Yeah, you did. You were like, you're like, get the fuck outta here. Usually you guys do your spots and bounce. Yep. The timing of it was an hour, hour and a half

Starting point is 00:05:20 until I go up. So I didn't want any pressure on you. To stay. Pressure on us to stay? Yeah, I know. Well, we're American citizens and we make decisions. Yeah. I paid my taxes sometimes and dude, you know?

Starting point is 00:05:32 I was also worried that I go up there and everyone in the room is just gonna be like, Bobby and Andrew are here. Bobby and Andrew are here. Yeah. They did. They did. They kept turning around,

Starting point is 00:05:41 should we laugh and we're like laugh. That's probably the only way. Right before we got on stage. Yeah, went like this. You went, I can laugh. Right. And then they would turn to me and I go, right, they go, ah, you know what I mean?

Starting point is 00:05:54 And they would turn, they would laugh at places, they weren't supposed to laugh because they didn't really know it. That's okay. And you're acting, you know what I mean? But, you know, I would go, no, no, no, no, no, that's a set up. Chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill.

Starting point is 00:06:03 So, you know, we directed them. You guys were my stage of arms. No, you know, we no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, smiling. Yeah. And we were holding each other. We were calling. Something a little bit. Yeah. There was no more room. All the seats were sold out. And you went up there to a packed room, sold out house, standing room only. Literally people were standing in the back. Yeah, it was incredible. What a magical night. And you had to follow a tough, tough run because it went. Oh, I alley Wong alley Wong. Neil. I'm sorry. Ricking room. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Before Ron, someone went on before Ron and ripped. Oh, I know what Fiji Man was.

Starting point is 00:06:49 Fiji. And then Ron, Fiji Man were Ron G, three killers. I mean, and everyone you walked up really, really was doing well. I mean, he didn't do as good. As good. Oh, thank you. What is, as good as the other people? No, dude.

Starting point is 00:07:03 I felt great about it. She's a girl. You killed her. She's not going to do well. No felt great about she's a girl. You kill she's not gonna do well No, she's a girl. I'm honest with you. You did so great. Not just great. You did better than Ranji Well, we don't need your racist you that's so far You did better than for him. I really do believe that racist again the laughs you were getting dude were real I have and I go I went I just went I teared up dead. I was proud of our little girl Yeah, I make me cry proud of my kid you ripped and now you're regularly get to call in and the best part is now You're gonna get really late night spots. That's my last night. What happened? My first spot in the main room

Starting point is 00:07:34 Who brought me up who did the Bob you brought her on? Yeah, what time was your spot? Oh, he gave me the most beautiful intro and he said let me say something to you right now I give the best intros in LA history, dude I know I was waiting for all the comics. I give ask anybody. I give the best interest of the Give me you keep I'm bringing you up Carlos Give me your name. I know your name. I forgot for a second right this next guy do hold on hold on Yeah, this guy's a regular at our club. Oh, no, he showcasing. Oh, okay Can you make sure you, yeah, is this

Starting point is 00:08:06 that the Oh hot dog? Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of that you say that while you're doing the intro. And we're also in Lankard, where are we at? We're on a park, Modesto, Modesto, we're in Modesto. Oh hot dog comedy club. No hot dog comedy club. Modesto. Opening weekend. That's how bad we are. Let's hear it. We get car loss. Let's hear it as our first opening weekend headland. Thanks guys. Guys, next guy coming to stage meant, dude, in terms of like the king of all holes, glory holes, this guy top three, dude.

Starting point is 00:08:33 We're right, right? Number two, dude, he's not even like the brown kind of Mexican. He's the, I know, but in terms of like the upper, snooty Mexican. Oh, right. Yeah. He's top of the line, dude. Wow, this guy sounds like he's gonna be great. Right, he's like the CEO of Baháfresh.

Starting point is 00:08:50 Whoa. That kind of Mexican. And here he is. No, no, I'm not talking. Oh, wow. He's also dude. He's only had warts twice. Wow.

Starting point is 00:08:59 Right, he's had warts twice. And then also on top of it, dude, he's like, uh, he's a dude in terms of drug addict. And I'll call it, he should be the president of all that. President of drug addict. A drug addict, Nis. Ladies and gentlemen. And I'll call it as a Carlos.

Starting point is 00:09:13 And I'd go, let's say, I would say to the side. Herrera. Herrerao. First joke out of the gate. Herrerao. They come out. First joke out of the gate. Go.

Starting point is 00:09:24 I was throwing my hat off. Hat off. That's it? No, a physical joke. No, we want a joke, a stand up joke. They come up. Harerrow! They come up. First joke out of the gate. Go. I was throwing my hat off. Hat off. That's it? That's it. You're a physical joke. No, we want a joke. I'll stand up joke.

Starting point is 00:09:32 No, this is a hot shot. And what's your opening joke? You're 45 minutes. And I have to do an opening joke. I would literally take my hat off. And that's not a joke. That's not a joke. That's not a joke.

Starting point is 00:09:40 That's not a walk off. Oh wow. That's what I would do. Well then, I'm going to call you in the office. I'm the manager. Hey. Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, man. What's going on? Hey, Andrew, how are you? Hey, man. Uh, don't call me Mr. Santino. If you don't mind. It's and I'm Mr. Lee. Thank you. Like you're okay. Let me just can I ask you? I, I, I know, I know, I know. Mr. Lee, yes. What's his name? Mr. Santino. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. You called us and said, may I headline? We should be agreed. Well, and begrudgingly. It was only because earthquake fell out. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Obviously, we need to get hamburger and then you know the Jackie Ducky, Jackie Ducky couldn't do it and you know Shramping Grits, you know him.

Starting point is 00:10:25 So with Chris, he could do it. He could do it. He was busy. Yeah. So naturally, as we fell down the list, yeah, we got to you. Which I'm grateful I'm on that list. And by the way, why did your email say,

Starting point is 00:10:35 you want to be called the Mexican Rexican? What is that even mean? What does that even mean? It was just like a signature I had on G. Mexican Rexican is your signature on your email? Yeah, on Gmail. But like I just want you to recognize me as that. I don't think so, buddy.

Starting point is 00:10:48 And your writer is crazy. It says, you want parachute pants, but from 89. And we're not going to get that. 1989 parachute pant was not even mean. I need to fly down from something and I'm hoping the pants will like that. Well, what is this? On the writer, this says you wanted a Sibian.

Starting point is 00:11:02 What do you see? What's a Sibian? It's a thing. It's like a vibrating thing. You sit on it and it energizes your experience. Is that for pre-performance stuff? Yeah, it's just so I can loosen up. What's this llama that happens to have scoliosis? Why do you do that?

Starting point is 00:11:17 I don't even know where to find a llama. Specifically scoliosis? I, it's like a sexual thing. I don't want to. Okay, all right. What is this, what is this? It'm here that says you need one of the staff members to read you Jack in the bean stock when you're done with your set Yeah, yeah, is that like a concert thing? It's like I have to be naked I was hoping Mr. Lee could do that part. Yeah, Mr. Lee is not telling you Mr. St. Tino that we talked earlier and he was We did actually talk. This is what he said to me. And I forgot to

Starting point is 00:11:46 tell you, because it feels like a lot. It is a lie. This is what he said. He goes, um, yo, I, he said, yo, by the way, I'm like, what's up? Dude, yeah. Anyway, um, what's up, Wands? Sean Wands? Yeah, I have a writer. Anyway, anyway, he said, I don't need an opener. Really? I'm gonna go cold. Really? He went up. He threw his hat down and he said, good night. The show was 45 second long. You thought 45 minutes, 45 seconds.

Starting point is 00:12:13 You thought 45 seconds? Wait. Yeah. No, it said, it said seconds on the thing. On the writer, I was like, look, 45 seconds ago. Did we screw up in it? It could have been, because she's our secretary. It could be a clerical. But you could, Baker, let me, have you ever been to a 45 second show. Did we screw up? Right. It could have been because she's our secretary. It could be a clerical.

Starting point is 00:12:26 But you could, Baker, let me, have you ever been to a standup show? Have you ever been to a standup show? And the show was 45 seconds long. Yeah, I saw you perform at the company's show. Oh my god. Go, go fuck him up.

Starting point is 00:12:38 Oh my god. Oh my god. You know what, dude? The bitch funny. So I'm going to let it go. But holy shit, dude. Holy shit. That's so funny so I'm gonna let it go but holy shit dude. Oh You're a fucking what I wasn't that in the show, you know that could have been your opening thing I brought you what fuck face, but I saved the funny for backstage or mr. Lee. Yeah, you should okay

Starting point is 00:12:57 Well, everyone wants their money back everybody's gonna get their money back Yeah, and here's how we're gonna make you pay it back. Here's the deal. We're all going to my mom and dad's house for Thanksgiving. Everyone's going to be there. What day is that? Uh, Thanksgiving's almost always on a Thursday. Almost. It's almost let me ask you something. Is Halloween always on a specific day? The 31. Yeah. It's the 31st. Yeah. But is it like a Monday, Tuesday? It's 30. It's 31st always a 31st. Yeah, but is it like a Monday Tuesday? It's 30 first always a certain day like you're conflating two different things Thanks, you've been always on the on the Thursday Third Thursday, the third Thursday of November, but it's not a specific the date change the date does change unfortunately Are you being real? Yeah, okay. Well, that's what I was confused about you've never known that in 52 years spinning

Starting point is 00:13:40 I swear to God I haven't all the time you're sitting on the shirt that it spins around now Are we going I was telling was like the 26th or something. I never did it. So well, I swear to God, I haven't. All the time you're sitting on the surface that it spins around. No. Are we going to? I always thought it was like the 26th or something. I never did it. So, well, you're about to do it. I literally Sunday, because I Tim Dylan has having a Thanksgiving party.

Starting point is 00:13:54 So I go, oh, I've never been invited on Thanksgiving at the dinner. He's like, you're not that I did. You were invited last year. I was gonna say last year. You were invited with me last year and you didn't come. I'm going now.

Starting point is 00:14:04 You're really gonna go this Sunday? Yeah. Good. You're going to be? Do you want to go together? No, because I'm bringing somebody. Who you bringing? Bad boy. Who you bringing? A friend. What I would really like is you and I go to a comics party as each other's dates, but you dress up like the woman and I dress up like a man in a suit and I take you on a nice little date. Would you have to be in character all night long? Sure. But what, it has to be like a Halloween party, right?

Starting point is 00:14:30 Or no. Why, I want it to be real. So I just randomly show up. Does it like Kim Dylan's birthday party? I'm gonna pick you up. As a woman. I'm gonna pick you up. No, why are you be the woman?

Starting point is 00:14:41 But you're the woman. How come I always be the woman? Listen to what you said, you sound like a woman. All right. What was up to be the woman, but you're the one I always with the woman listen to what you said it you sound like a woman Yeah, all right Whoa Damn it voice woman, okay. Yeah, yeah, all right. How'd you do last night? It was it was hard work But it was good. What do you mean the crowd was a little thinner? Well last night was who Mark Marin Pilber Eliza Fucking me, bitch.

Starting point is 00:15:05 Well, yeah, we already know you, what up. Oh, sorry about that. I thought you were leaving me out of it. When he introred me, he gave me this beautiful intro and he says, so some of you guys know, I'm on this podcast. I'm on this podcast. Repeat it, Pintro.

Starting point is 00:15:16 Pintro, repeat it. What an amazing show we've seen tonight. I said that. Yeah, okay. And then he said, it's gonna get better. We've seen tonight. I said that. Yeah. Okay. And then you said, it's going to get better. Remember? Just, just, what you think I said.

Starting point is 00:15:31 You said, I am going to bring up somebody very special. Some of you guys might know that I have a podcast already. Murmors in the crowd. Oh my God. Is it him? Is it him? Did I think it's the same thing think it has been such a wonderful addition to our podcast and then I heard it fancy. I heard an audible. Oh No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, He said that she is the newest paid regular. Yeah, I tell you. That is what happened.

Starting point is 00:16:08 No, could I tell you what happened? Okay, you tell me. Okay, first of all, I said, we have something special coming up. Yes. Okay, as you know, that I have a podcast called Bad Friends. They all thought it was Andrew.

Starting point is 00:16:18 No, three people stood up, right? And I go, she, I go, I go, she, you know, I said, you know, in order to do this stage, you have to get passed as a paid regular. And it's a very difficult thing to do. It's a big deal. It's a big deal, right? This girl is our sidekick on Bathroom.

Starting point is 00:16:36 She opens first on the road and something like that. And I go, this is her first spot as a paid regular. And I can't, I'm so proud of her, right? That's what I fucking said. It made me so happy. It sounds like that's what you said. But it was for real, literally, there were people in the audience

Starting point is 00:16:52 I could hear from backstage going, no one said that, that's the thing. And yet, dude, why would I be out of? Because you're delusional. No. You're influenced by them.

Starting point is 00:17:02 Can't you see how that could, and then I walked on stage and I said, thank, like, give it up for Bobby. That's such an ice-sense out. And sorry, I'm not Andrew. And a bunch of people laughed. Yeah, I said, that's nice. They laughed, right?

Starting point is 00:17:12 Yeah, they got it. Well, the reason was that they laughed. And it was an all-star's lineup. So they were thinking, Santino's coming up. Well, I was originally on the line. Yeah. And I had to not be on it.

Starting point is 00:17:22 And then what did you call yourself at backstage? I never heard that before. Riff rap. Riff rap. After Bobby has a disorder, riff rap starts. So I didn't know. Who was after you? More riff rap.

Starting point is 00:17:33 Quincy, all great comics, but. Great riff rap. I never, but I've never, I've never, because we never, when we were new as a paid regular, we never called ourselves riff rap. What'd you call yourself? We just thought we were part of the lineup. I go, people are at different levels,

Starting point is 00:17:48 but it made me sad that you would say that about yourself. Really? I was just being self-awarely. People would come to the comedy store to see stars. So there is a divide in the show where it's like, Yeah, but you're a part of the, you're a peer, you're a regular now, so you're a peer. Even more so that that you got past your name's gonna be written in cursive on that wall It feels so crazy. Isn't that kind of cool to be on that wall. Yeah, that's a cool part of you in the wall

Starting point is 00:18:14 I've I've seen urine on my name no less than a dog. I know what part I'm not kidding Where I'm by the back entrance and I'm low to the ground people have pissed all over the bottom wall drunk guys pee all over the wall There's new movie or I've asked to move it multiple time. You don't run this where up front. You're up front That's just up front above the main room. Oh You are yet next to Eddie Murphy all of a good your headshot is also right by the original room Yeah, I mean you've been there for 50. I don't have a headshot in the original room in the main room I do in the hallway leading to the original room. I don't have a headshot in the original room in the main room. I do in the hallway leading to the original room I don't have a headshot in the hallway in the you want a bet? I

Starting point is 00:18:48 Sort of got I don't I've never seen a headshot better money Hundred bucks I'm gonna get a night air shake air shake air shake Okay, yes, but I'm texting I don't want you moving it. Oh, that's smart So it was it's somebody that put it in there accidentally. I saw it last night because I was like, where's my it's got to be new then. It's got to be. No, it's an old headshot. Okay. Yeah. But they put it up new maybe maybe they just re put it up. Maybe. And but your headshot and I got a little mad. I'm sorry, but your headshot in the improv, it's in a very nice place. Mine is not. It they're moving in next to mine.

Starting point is 00:19:26 Are they really? Don't be honest. I talked to him. He said we're moving, they're moving them right. They want, he goes, do you want Bobby right next to you? I said, yeah. Because mine's in the back somewhere weird. You're in the, you're in the hall, but you're going to come up to you.

Starting point is 00:19:36 No, I'm not in the hall. I'm in the same hall. I have three up. Yeah. I have one in the hall, one where the bathroom is and one tiny one upstairs Yeah, I've one upstairs. You're gonna be right next to me in that and that and thank you so much moving me up I want you to thank you so much some moving you up. It's moving you were you're moving work You know me where are the cool people are thank you so much there are like yeah

Starting point is 00:19:59 It is it's like the highest like level of right and I'm up with Whitney in the corner of some You know, I did say that at the party Whitney in the corner of some, you know. I did say that at the party. That was the first club that passed me. The store didn't pass me, the improv passed me first. Yeah. And I still have the email. It's a great club.

Starting point is 00:20:12 I have the email from the day I got passed on my birthday. You know the chances of that? Is that insane? I got an email from Eric Abrams at the improv. Say congratulations from the improv. You're now allowed to call in for spots. I have something to share with you. It's gonna make you mad.

Starting point is 00:20:24 Go ahead. Ellie told me not to say anything. Who did these guys did? No, the improv. What? What? And over the light, dude! What is it?

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Starting point is 00:23:18 Tough. What? I just got a pay bump. They're paying you more money to do spots. Yeah, and I go, I go, am I making more than? They go, yeah, and they said don't tell us. It's great. And I go, I will not play this room unless I always get more.

Starting point is 00:23:39 Whoa. And they go, okay. Then me. How much more? It's got to be at least a hundred. That's funny, because I just do it for the art. Pfft. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Starting point is 00:23:51 It's so not true. I don't call for the money. Yeah, but anyway, I'm- You don't go to the improv. Thank you, Rob. I'm glad you're a paid regular at the comedy store, and let's all say congratulations to our love, our sweet juice, the Jetski herself congratulations

Starting point is 00:24:06 I'm getting but it's a big deal man. You want to tell us about Your fired from the show sorry, we did say we made a pact and we said this soon as you get past the story You're fired from the show that was literally a pact and everybody knows and it's kind of a bomber that we didn't tell you earlier But we're telling me yes Are you for real? Yeah, yeah. This is how you need to. You hurt though? Well, I feel weird that this public firing. I know, so if we're being honest,

Starting point is 00:24:31 make sure you don't like don't wiggle in too much into the chair, we'd like someone else's butt to be able to be fitting. You guys are crazy. I don't believe you. I can't imagine never doing shows with you. Oh my God. We're probably gonna clip... Clip it!

Starting point is 00:24:45 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, because, um, you know, I went through some hard times and stuff and, um, eight months ago, whatever, and it's, I had the right kind of person to go on the road with. All of you, but you are involved in that. Big time. That I went, your temperament, your support, your positivity, positivity was just something I needed at the time.

Starting point is 00:25:09 Unmatched. Unmatched. But now I think your attitude is insane. Oh, I'm gonna take that back. But I really know, I really can't imagine not ever knowing you. Oh my God. I don't think that you would betray me.

Starting point is 00:25:22 Never. I would never betray you. People of betrayed. People betrayed, dude. Nobody in this room. No, no one in this room. But if someone were gonna betray, we'd go Carlos and then McCone.

Starting point is 00:25:36 I think McCone first for sure. Yeah, yeah, I don't ever. You don't betray. I wouldn't betray you. What could I did for you, Bob? Yeah, then I did for you. You did that for last. And also, I'll tell you why you would.

Starting point is 00:25:45 No fries. Yeah, no fries. You get a burger. This is not even a lie, dude. Ever since I saw that hamburger with no fries, that right there was worse than not getting it. That's not a real burger. I'd rather get not a hamburger.

Starting point is 00:25:58 I can't let this go on any longer. That was my call. No, no, no, no. You're eating a whole bowl. You're a part, I was with McLean in the car. And I told them not to get fries. Why? What's your logic? And you waited a whole week to tell us this? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no fries and salt. Oh my god. You're saying he's fat. Yeah, he is you're saying he's fat But I'm saying he's it's a concert it's McCones responsibility go. No, dude. Thank you I'm gonna get the fries no no no that's his challenge Carlos. You're not exempt you fuckhead

Starting point is 00:26:39 No, he's saying he's saying you both fucked up McCone should have been like no I bet you he wants fries and your dumbass Shouldn't have stepped in the way of projecting about his weight because you think he's overweight. You're overweight. No, you're not. Allie said it the other day.

Starting point is 00:26:51 Who? In front of you, Allie Wong. Because she weighs about nine pounds. I know, but she looked at, she goes, she does what she said. We were in the kitchen. Yeah, I know. And she looks at you, she goes,

Starting point is 00:27:00 what are you doing? You look so good. And you're like, I'm doing this and this, right? Yeah, but why is he like, it'll shape like that. And why are you still shape like this? Yeah, yeah, and I looked at her, I'm like, but at least you're retained. That means you're retained.

Starting point is 00:27:11 You stayed the same. She sees you the same. You're not overweight. I know, I am a little. No, you're not. I'm fine. I love it. I feel great.

Starting point is 00:27:21 I do have arthritis, but yeah, I'm fine. Dude, we're falling apart. We're falling apart. I went to the doctor and I'm have arthritis, but yeah, I'm fine. Dude, we're falling apart. We're falling apart. I went to the doctor and I'm on fucking... Oh. I'm on lev- what is it called? Levitra? No, I've said it wrong three times.

Starting point is 00:27:34 Levitraal. Did you talk about what happened in the hotel room? What is this for? That's for erectile dysfunction. Oh, yeah. I'm on lipitor. Lipitor. Levitra is boner pills, I'm on lipitor. Lipitor. Levitra is boner pills.

Starting point is 00:27:46 I'm not on those. Why? I don't need them. Honestly, I'm not against boner pills, but I don't need them. I am still very blessed. One day when I was fucking 16 years old, I remember an ad came on about boner pills and my dad.

Starting point is 00:28:00 My dad really slightly was smoking a cigarette and he's like, you're never gonna need those. And I was like, what? And he's like, runs into family. He gets strong blood. He said that. Yeah, I was like, holy shit. My dad still gets owners. He's would. Yeah, yes. And then he said, just the way he smokes. And then he said something about he was like, I get out of here. Co-reons. He was all, you know, he got real plenty. He's really, really, really, so he's whatons. He was all, you know, he got real funny. He got real, really funny. He's sweaty, yeah.

Starting point is 00:28:27 I'm on lipitor right now. High cholesterol, high triglyceride levels. So I'm, my doctor put me on this. My young Asian doctor put me on this. And what is that supposed to do? Lipitor. Make it so I don't have a stroke or heart attack. Oh.

Starting point is 00:28:39 I have a bad, I already have a bad ticker. As everybody knows, I've talked, my heart's bad. I've got a fucking murmur, have a hole in my heart. Right. I've talked my heart's bad. I've got a fucking murmur. I have a hole in my heart. And he said my cholesterol levels were high. And he said, have you experiencing any semblance of high stress traveling a lot,

Starting point is 00:28:52 being near a Korean for an extended period of time? Dude. And I said, no, not that I can remember. I had a dream that you died. Don't. Why? No, let's do that. Why would you do that?

Starting point is 00:29:03 Can I just say so? No, it's good. It's good that I die. No, well, would you do that? Can I just say something? No, it's good. It's good that I die. No, well, how I did it. You killed her? What the fuck? You killed me in your dream. No, no, let me explain.

Starting point is 00:29:13 Well, get through it. Right, I don't know how you died in, you know, you don't know the details. But I remember me making decisions of like leaving the country and just I remember just living in like a cottage, like my complete life changed. So when I die, that's your e-pre-love moment.

Starting point is 00:29:32 When I die, you get to go on a journey and find yourself. No, that's where I die in a cottage by myself in France eating cheese and wine. What the fuck are you talking about? So I die, so you go kill yourself? You slowly eat yourself. I'm just saying, I love you so much, and if you die, it would just devastate me.

Starting point is 00:29:46 It sounds like a happy story. It sounds like you quit the pod, you took the money, you moved away, you quit. What money? From my death. I mean, you will? Not anymore. Not if you're having dreams about it.

Starting point is 00:30:00 Yeah, yeah. You're on my life insurance. You're on my life insurance. You have a will? I do. I have a will too. You're on my will. You You're on my life insurance. You have a will? I do. I have a will too. You're on my will. You're not on mine.

Starting point is 00:30:08 And I want you to put it on. I'm not on your will. I just didn't consider it until now. I had... I'm gonna call my guy. I said if any sort of revenue from this company in the event of my death would all go to you. Well, no, in your death half of it would go to your family

Starting point is 00:30:21 and I would go to the other half. No, I cut my family out. You think I want those pigs with my money? I saw saw. They're gonna spend it on bad stuff. Right. I want it to go to you. Yeah. My family. Yeah. Do you get family? I get cousins asking for money. Yeah, I'm getting it this week a lot. I had. I had out of nowhere. I haven't talked to with 30 years. I haven't talked to with 30 years. Yo man, I need 15 grand. I go, I need all your fucking dollars. Start with one, 15,000 dollars.

Starting point is 00:30:50 Yeah, I have your fucking mind. That's so much money, too. I mean, I could get it if it was like my mom, she needed surgery. Anything for your mom. Yeah, yeah. I would pick it for your mom. I would pick it for your mom.

Starting point is 00:31:02 You know, my titty. What's wrong? My titty gone. Your titty's gone? Yeah, it dies. Well, let me taste them. I'll find out if they're okay. I would not taste my mom's titty.

Starting point is 00:31:10 It's gone. Let me taste your mom's titty's. It's getting weird. How do you say good boy in Korean? I don't know. And it's so funny. How do you not know how to say good boy? I never called him that. That's right. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. God, you's so funny. How do you not know how to say good boy? They never called him that. That's right.

Starting point is 00:31:25 Oh, yes. Oh, yes. God, you're so quick. You fuck off. How do you say good boy in Korea? Imagine me kissing on your mom's boobs while she says that. I would say yum jane. Yum jane.

Starting point is 00:31:35 What is that? It's a nice guy. Nice. Chakhan Sonyeon. Sonyeon. That's Chakhan Sonyeon. Chakhan Sonyeon. Chakhan Sonyeon. Chakhan Sonyeon. So that's me. I'm kissing on your mouth, baby.

Starting point is 00:31:47 She's chakansonyan. Chakansonyan. Chakansonyan. By the way, my new nickname. With your mom today, I don't need to do that. Chakansonyan. Chakansonyan. Oh my god. Chakansonyan. Please go.

Starting point is 00:32:01 Here, look, I'm your mom. Chakansonyan.. Jakan Sonyan. Jakan Sonyan. Jakan Sonyan. Jakan Sonyan. Jakan Sonyan. Jakan Sonyan. Alright, stop, stop.

Starting point is 00:32:18 Stop. Stop. Now there's going to be fucking T-shirts with sh** I'm gonna I'm gonna deal with it We have somebody make a t-shirt I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties

Starting point is 00:32:36 I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I'm gonna be smog with their titties I wanna know. I don't wanna know, I don't wanna know, I already, what would you do? I'd have a charity event at the comedy store. Yeah, I raised money and she'd take it all.

Starting point is 00:32:50 But should we quit this thing and start a band and be happy without Hollywood? You know, a lot of my fears and my sadness comes from Hollywood, so yeah, maybe. We should quit it. Yeah, I don't wanna do it anymore. Hollywood is scary and I watch just a kind of changed some of this but that movie you're in one movie full of paradise I didn't even know you're in it and you opened it up small scene

Starting point is 00:33:13 But that's all about the Hollywood in the industry. Yeah, Charlie day Charlie My buddy Charlie dated a movie called full of paradise is great. Yeah, I loved your cameo in it You like the movie? Yeah, I liked it a lot. I thought it was really funny. It was me and actually I got tagged in it. People say it's me and you. Yeah, I also thought it was gonna be Bobby. Should've been. No, you, it's fine.

Starting point is 00:33:34 I love Ken. I thought it was you about halfway through the movie. Were you laughing at it? Were you laughing at it, dude? I'm not laughing. Yeah, you are. How come you keep picking roles with other Koreans that aren't Bobby? They handed to me.

Starting point is 00:33:46 They asked me to do it with other Koreans. And I keep fighting to do it with Bobby. But if I'm going to make an announcement, and here I will, I'll say it. I'll say it even though it's not done yet. But Bob and I are doing an animated series. Right now we're working on it, literally right now. We just had a call about it a couple of hours ago. We're going to be doing a little animation.

Starting point is 00:34:03 You're not going gonna replace them. Uh, what do you mean by that? Because he keeps working with all these other greens. Do you know how Hollywood works? No, I don't. This is, this is what we do together. And when it comes to everything else, you know, it's fine.

Starting point is 00:34:21 Yeah, it's fine. Yeah. Everything's fine. I know my place in the world and I'm very happy It's a good place. I enjoy my life. What are you gonna do for Christmas? By the way? You know myself Well then I kill myself so you're getting me a gift. Yeah Finally, are you gonna go back to Arizona? See your mom for Christmas? I might have to yeah, I need something You know, you really just bump me out just now man. I did yeah

Starting point is 00:34:42 Wait cuz I reminded you about all the other Korean Sandra works with I love it. I love what you're doing right now Well, you can rest easy. I won't be in beef season two. Why I died They shot me in the head. Oh, they shot me in the face. I don't know. I think they might bring you back Yeah, two good friends are mine are now riding on that show Really? Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't found it.

Starting point is 00:35:08 Yeah, yeah. And Jean. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's right.

Starting point is 00:35:16 Right. Well, I had a fun little week in in Vegas. I'm sad that I came back early because I didn't go to go to F1, but boy oh boy did I have fun out there. F1. Tell me about it. I mean, it's just, I didn't get to see F1, but I got to hang out with some of the other people

Starting point is 00:35:27 that were in it, it was wild to like, give me a name. You don't know F1, do you? Don't be there celebrities there, you hang out with? No, I mean, F1 guys are celebrities in the F1 world. But if you don't know, yeah, do you know Lando Norris? I know the bush guy.

Starting point is 00:35:39 Carlo Sands, bush, but that's NASCAR. Kyle Bush, wrong Wrong, wrong game. Is it a machine though? You're driving a run on machine. F1, it's... It's different level. It's this, dude. All right, all right, learn. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, But the NASCAR drivers, you guys are also very talented. I mean, is cock fighting like that?

Starting point is 00:36:05 Is there like different levels? Oh yeah, top cock. Top cock. Oh, top cock is different than just regular street level cock. Top cock on Netflix. It's one of the best shows out. Oh, really? Top cock.

Starting point is 00:36:14 Who has the best, who has the best cock fighting skills? You have no idea who top cock is right now? Orlando Falendro, one top cock this season. Is that a real guy? How does that, are you joking? Orlando Falendro, one top cock this season. Is that a real guy? How does that? Are you joking? Orlando, Philandro, one top. Orlando, Philandro.

Starting point is 00:36:28 Orlando, Philandro. Orlando, Philandro. He won top cock this year. Really? Where's he from? Spain. He's a Cuban guy that lives in fucking Miami. And his, his chicken, his cock.

Starting point is 00:36:38 Yeah, he comes out with his cock and he goes, to intimidate the other top. Really? Yeah. He says, Philandro the other top. Really? Yeah. He says, Flanando is here, Cruck, Cruck, Cruck, Cruck, Cruck, Cruck, Cruck, Cruck, and everyone hates it.

Starting point is 00:36:49 And what are the, are there's cocks? What are their names? Like his, what's his cocks name? Well, his, his cock must retire. I mean, how many fights can they do? Buddy, you don't know anything about cock fighting. They retire when they die. They kill, they fight to the death.

Starting point is 00:37:05 Oh, so he's been in, so his main cock, what's his name? Orlando's cock. The name of, it's called Orlando's cock. That's the joke. Oh really? Cause if I thought Orlando's cock, I go, hey Orlando's cock. You'd go, hey nice cock.

Starting point is 00:37:17 Jimmy. No Orlando's cock. Hi Jimmy. And he walks out, he goes, okay. Who wants to see Orlando's cock? Ha ha ha ha ha. That's what he does, it comes out, yeah. Wow,. I had no idea and that's his top cock on Netflix top cock on Netflix download it right now

Starting point is 00:37:31 It's all about him or their other other cockfighters. Well, he's featured because he won this season But give me another guy. That's maybe his nemesis who Orlando's nemesis. Yeah, Miami, Jibin They're all from they're all Cubans at London. So Miami, Jimmy, Miami, Jabeen, Jabeen. Yeah, Miami, Jabeen, Miami, Jabeen. Yeah, he's one of the other ones. Right. And then does he have a cock? Oh, he's got a real nice cock. Right. What's it called? Marcus. That's what he calls it. Marcus. I think as Marcus and Orlando's cock fight before they fought in season one or two But I thought they fight to the death. Yeah, they fought in season one or two. You know who I'm rooting

Starting point is 00:38:13 So he no longer one of them no longer exists Marcus Marcus died Marcus is gone Oh, there's an undercard though Susan Smith. Oh Susan Smith is pretty good. She lives in Florida, but her cock is crazy crazy. Susan Smith's cock is really nice. Is it nice? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This cock can knit. It knits right before a fight. She may be one of the nicest cocks I've ever seen. She's from Connecticut, but she moved for the competition. Whoa. And they have the little the knives. Razors. Razaysers, dude. They don't have hands. I'll hold them. See if you're gonna talk about stuff like that. I don't see the fucking show. I know.

Starting point is 00:38:49 But do they have the little razors? Yeah, Susan's cock is shredded. Is there a company that makes that, or is it like dueling companies? Like, you know, because in F1, we have the dueling car companies and this and that and brands. So it does like that.

Starting point is 00:39:02 Raysers have their own companies that make the razor. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, cock cutters out of, a cock cutters is what that's out of Dallas, Texas, probably some of the best. Are there the best? Yeah, cock cutters from the different lands or like different country.

Starting point is 00:39:14 Well, well, you think the Philippines probably that. I don't know if I should mention this now giving what's going on in the world right now. Yeah, but Israel. Israel probably made some of the best cock cutting tools of all time. Wow. I mean, Israel probably made some of the best cost cutting tools of all time. Wow. I mean, Israel probably made some of the best cock cutters. But they're not using them right now because it's going on over their

Starting point is 00:39:31 business. I see. But you could still probably get stuff from Black Market. Like if I had a cock I was raising and I want the best Israeli cock cutter. Cock cutter. Yeah. I could probably get in the Black Market. Honestly, the Black Market has the best cocks. Yeah. market. Honestly, the black market has the best cocks. Yeah. Someone would argue that the black market has the best cocks, but... The black market has the best cut cutter. Cut cutters.

Starting point is 00:39:52 And cocks. And cocks. But no one's afraid, but people are so afraid to use them. Would the boat be heavy? Yeah. I tell you, when they hit you, they hurt. I bet. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:40:00 Just lugging that around. It's just bigger than normal. Yeah. It's bigger than usual. I want lightweight, like NASA shit. Right. Well, like bigger than normal. Yeah, I want lightweight like NASA shit Right, well, like if I had a cock I would have lightweight like a small little Asian you want a tiny little Asian cock Yeah, from maybe from China well little China lightweight one. Well, you do you get you can get it There's different leagues. Yeah, you get a yellow league. There's a yellow card league. There is yeah Want to get one of those black cocks you never turn it back once you get a black cock you never turn

Starting point is 00:40:23 Oh, why not that in the arena right? You'll never go back never ever get a little Asian one Well, why would you it's just once you've graduated, you know, okay? You don't go from a four door car down to a fucking smart car, you know like you already have a Cockfuck what's it called top cock on that flex? I think season three or four Carlos. What is it? We watch it together? We're on four season. Yeah, she's in? We watch it together. We're on four now. Four seasons. Yeah. Season four.

Starting point is 00:40:48 Binging it together. Wow. What's the origin of a cockfighting? I don't know anything about that. Where did it start? Yeah. And this is kind of like a history piece. If you're a history buff out there, people that were coming to South Florida from Cuba

Starting point is 00:41:00 or the DR, mostly from Cuba. Oh, Dominican Republic. Public, yeah. When they're floating over here, when they're rafting here, what ends up happening is you have to bring food and provisions and also pets and friends, and they all bring a cock with them at least one cock. Right.

Starting point is 00:41:15 And when you bump into another raft, you have to go ahead and head otherwise you get sacrificed your rations on the way in. Yeah. They can basically deflate it. I heard that one story in 30 years ago where a cock still had his little and then inflated, deflated one of the other rounds.

Starting point is 00:41:29 And they all drowned. I remember that. That's partially where it's hard. I was like, take them off and put it in the thing. Right. But he went, they sank. And they was like, your cock popped my raft. And that was like, you're getting a ride.

Starting point is 00:41:38 I remember that story. Yeah. I know a little bit about it. Your cock sunk my battleship. It was basically what happened. Right, right. I know a little bit. Yeah, yeah. That's interesting. It was was basically what happened. Right, right. A little bit. Yeah, yeah. That's interesting.

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Starting point is 00:44:51 like a man today. Mm hmm. I was going to say and drive into a real cock fight before in Bali. There's blood everywhere I had to get out from the cocks. There's cock blood all over the place. It was crazy. Did they have a guy that comes up and can clean the cock blood because that sounds like a job from a cone. No, as soon, there's cock blood all over the place. It was crazy. Did they have a guy that comes up and clean the cock blood? Because that sounds like a job from a cone. No, as soon as there's blood, I was like, I got a roll. You know, it's so funny because we took a comedy bit. Made it sad.

Starting point is 00:45:13 And rift on it. And then you brought reality into the game, which sort of fucked up the momentum, no? I was really bad. I mean, it's like, what are you doing? It was fun. I wanted to want to be a lot of fun. Yeah, I mean, I know. It was really bad. I mean, it's like, what do you do with it? I wanted to tell you what I'm doing. I was talking about it. I was talking about it.

Starting point is 00:45:27 Yeah, I mean, a lot of fucking birds died. It was gnarly. Yeah, yeah, we get it. It was like intense. Yeah, yeah. The fuck out of that. It is disgusting. Well, but it's disgusting.

Starting point is 00:45:35 I'll tell you what's more disgusting. What? Dog fighting. Oh, I can't even, don't even, don't even. Don't even. Okay, you want to hear something then? No. I don't want to know.

Starting point is 00:45:44 I don't, I hate it. No, we're about to get another dog. Oh, great. And one of the dogs we're rescuing was part of one of these train kill shelters. Oh, they're training. A pit bull? It has pit in it. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:45:56 It's mixed. It's nice. Well, I haven't met him yet. We're about to go, we wanna go get him. Okay. Make sure to that, make sure. No, dude, you can, you can, you can, they train them from in their car. You can reverse it, yeah. But also this is their puppies, their puppies. Oh, their puppies. Okay. But they sure about make sure. No, dude, you can you can you can River they train them from the good. But also this is their puppies, their puppies.

Starting point is 00:46:07 Oh, their puppies. Yeah. Yeah. I love to meet it. We're trying to say we're trying to save them because they it's crazy to think people fucking see a puppy. And they're like, I'm gonna make it a killing machine. Yeah, it's a puppy. Yeah. What the fuck is wrong with people on her? I think if you fuck with dogs and fuck up and hurt dogs, I think if you fuck with dogs and fuck up and hurt dogs, I think that should be a higher penalty than when you murder a human. Yeah. Well, I'm not wrong.

Starting point is 00:46:30 I'm not wrong. They're babies. They're defenseless is the thing. A human can fight back if you killed a human, but you had a reason for someone killing someone, right? Like a gang that hates another gang. There's reasoning and a human has defense. And a puppy has no defense.

Starting point is 00:46:44 What about cocks? Co dog has no defense. Hmm. What about Cox? Cox are very defensive. Okay. And they their mood swings are insane. Sometimes they're kind of buckled in. Sometimes they're really showing off. Sure true.

Starting point is 00:46:55 You know what else videos I don't like when people are when their dog or cat is passing? Hmm. We had the music. That's the sort of. I've never seen those videos. Right. Your algorithm is different than mine. Yeah, right and it's like you know too white Right, why is it white because we care no because they want to show off their grief. Oh, that's be real Yeah, but yeah cuz when they're like okay, and go

Starting point is 00:47:20 You're not crying before him record Right and they do it right and they cut it off the right okay, well, let's go you know, I mean You're not crying for him. Record. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do It makes me so fucking angry dude. I saw a video once where this guy had his dog the running by a swamp and an alligator just comes out nowhere and eats the dog. Yeah, and it's like, bro! Least it! Least the fucking puppy! You know there's an alligator in that shit! What are you doing dude? Least shit! Yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:03 There's a piece of me that God. Maybe that one. Maybe that guy did that on purpose. Everybody lives in Florida knows there's all those all those fuckers. Oh, you think he purpose into this? I think he was fucking ear a poodle. It was a poodle, I think.

Starting point is 00:48:15 Well, maybe he was getting on his fucking nerves. Do you think when the alligator burped like fur just? What if like the dogs were in a run and it was a Chinese got to came out That'd be a switch Yeah, full block crocodile now A full book of rock it on that. That's a fun. He's a guy in a truck and I would be so funny.

Starting point is 00:48:46 Anyway, yeah, that drives me crazy. I think he's so, what is this thing? What was you adamant to show us? Oh, that this July, Portuguese man in Turkey was imprisoned for three weeks for looking gay. Go up to the top. A man was arrested for looking gay and wearing crop top in Turkey in prison for three weeks.

Starting point is 00:49:04 Is he gay? No, I believe that he just looks gay. He's European. He's European. Uh, stolen valor. Yes, stolen valor. That's a little too gay for me. That's the guy that got arrested for quote unquote not being gay.

Starting point is 00:49:15 I mean, he's guilty. He's fucking gay. Lock him up. Yeah, just call out. Yeah, lock him up. Somebody put a ring on. If he's gay, I'm gay, fuck it. Let's do it.

Starting point is 00:49:23 Somebody put a ring and handcuffs on this guy. Lock him up. So cute though on it. If he's gay, I'm gay, fuck it, let's do it. Somebody put a ring and handcuffs on this guy. Lock him up. So cute though. You know, as a cops arrested him, he was like, tt tt t's not illegal, but the I would say it reminds me of. It reminds problematic, it's by certain legal advancements. Homosexuality is decriminalized. Although homosexuality is decriminalized,

Starting point is 00:49:50 wow, thanks. Like it's like weed. It's decriminalized. You can have homos on you, but you can't be using them when we catch you. Can't do it in public. Yeah, I can't do that. In some African too, that in private.

Starting point is 00:50:00 You can do that stuff. You can do gays stuff in private like weed, but you can't. Well, there's some African countries that's death penalty. What do you mean? If you're gay, there's some Middle Eastern countries or it's fucking death penalty. You go, you go get caught in Middle East and half the places they'll fucking kill you. That's insane to me.

Starting point is 00:50:13 In places that are insane to you. Yeah, what the fuck? I don't think it's even an argument. If you, you can't, Wait, wait, those are the countries where it's illegal to be gay. Why they make them pink that's such a gay guy. Look at that. There's one little pink area in South America. Where's that? What country is that? Yeah. Oh, what?

Starting point is 00:50:31 Guyana. Like a person. Guyana. Guyana. And gay is in it. Yeah. Yeah. Guyana. Let's see how gay all these countries sound. Go over the name of it. Yeah. Let's see if it sounds gay. I used to fuck a guy named Chad. Yeah. I am Chad. What else? Well, you get five hundred thousand West African CFA France. That's a $3.30 bucks. Indonesia. I do know that. Yeah. It is criminal to be gay there. Uzbekistan. Stan. That's pretty like, like, Mar-Tah-M. Mari death by stoning where stoning in Maritiana.

Starting point is 00:51:10 Mertonia. Oh, that's saying. You know why they do that. They're trying to get attention. I've never heard of this fucking country in my life. Where the fuck is that? We're in Kenya, Africa on the horn of Africa. Stoning Jesus Christ. God, I imagine the guy that's got to go get the stones. That's even more insane to call you got to go get stones to hurt If you're getting a stone, can you cover your face with your hands or no? No, they tie you up. Oh, they don't It's a crazy. You can't do this. No, you can but it's like no, you can't yeah

Starting point is 00:51:39 No, no, they tie their hands behind their back Oh, why you've been to a couple, Spain, I'm sure being by the way, you guys invented gay. Right. Let's not do a picture of it, bud. What's that? That's a stoning. Oh my god. I actually went to the stoning one. Yeah. There was blood everywhere. That's that. What's that right now? That is a stoning. That's insane. What is that? I would go to one just to see. All right a stoning yeah, you're fucking disgusting Yeah, I was standing close for a cock fight versus a stoning of a human being well the animal's still like fight to the death Yeah, but at least they have a fair shot. Yeah, the purpose of the game stone doesn't is an throwing rock

Starting point is 00:52:19 And by the way that's if you do get stoning they just give you a few bags that throw back to like all right Let's go. Oh, yeah, that'd be fair. If I'd fight back, well, it still wouldn't be fair. That guy threw a first stone when he sucked that dick though. Oh my God, Jesus Christ. I just got back from Texas. Yeah. People in well-decorated interior houses should not be throwing stones.

Starting point is 00:52:39 In this unbelievable house, some parts of the world is just not the same. I mean, it's like they're not, they just haven't caught up or they have these old traditions and rules, it's weird. Yeah. Because we're so connected, you know what I mean? Through the internet that like, I just can't see how it's possible.

Starting point is 00:52:56 What do you mean? That people have these weird rules like, you know? Well, these are based on thousands of years of them being indoctrinated with an idea of their most, 99 of that is religious based that homosexuality is against their their their religious practice. Yeah, but as a kid, I'm not kidding you. My dad would be like, if you're if you're Steve gay, everybody are going to die. I'm going to kill everybody.

Starting point is 00:53:21 Yeah, he would say stuff like that. Yeah, thank you. Like everybody. Yeah, your friend Charlie, Franco, they all die. That's insane. I would say it right. You were just joking around.

Starting point is 00:53:30 No, he was like saying, it was another one. If you met him, he'd let me, the woman, don't call it. Well, that I understand. Yeah, it's like I won't call them, fuck you. You know what I mean? But even as a kid, you listen to that. You're six years old at dinner.

Starting point is 00:53:42 You know what I mean? Yeah. If you get everybody but, and I'd be eating my, you know, Korean food, I'll be like, that's insane. That doesn't make any sense. What did your mom say? She's okay, okay.

Starting point is 00:53:52 He's not okay, he's not okay. You know what I mean? Like try to play it off, but it's like you hear all these things and even as a kid living in that house, I was able to go, you know what? That just sounds like insane. And it doesn't make any sense.

Starting point is 00:54:06 Yeah, it just doesn't seem right. It doesn't seem right. So it's like, and you kind of, so I'm just saying, like these countries, there's not a kid there going, yeah, this seems weird. You would think there would be a bunch of kids. I think, but I think if everybody around you

Starting point is 00:54:21 is speaking the same language, it'd be hard to learn another one. Really? I just don't, I just think if everyone, dude, if you're only shown one thing, and particularly if you're shown that Western culture is bullshit, if they're talked about that we're bullshit, that we're disgusting and against what they believe

Starting point is 00:54:38 in their religious beliefs, then of course they fucking hate us. Or you see like a grouping of pressed, and you're doing the to your oppressor. Like I would, in my mind be like, no, this is not, this seems you would think so, but that's only because you've gotten what you've got. No, I think that I mean, maybe I'm wrong and I don't know, but maybe I'm wrong, but I feel like no matter what society

Starting point is 00:54:59 that I'm in, I would look at the circumstances and go, you know, that doesn't make any sense. That's if you're lucky enough to be educated. No, I think it's just the thing. No, but I'm saying, if you're young and you're uneducated, Bob, you don't have these kind of... I was uneducated. I've never read a book of my life. You grew up in America, and I've been... Oh, okay, okay.

Starting point is 00:55:14 You know what I mean? You know what I mean? But do you guys understand what I'm saying? Uneducated, and if your needs are not met, then you're thinking of other things like survival and food. There's always a group of people that thing like that in every country. Yeah, there's people that... You think how those women like march in Iran by the fact that they were like... I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them.

Starting point is 00:55:27 I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them.

Starting point is 00:55:35 I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them.

Starting point is 00:55:43 I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always sacrifice all of them. I always blah blah blah. And I think a lot of that was like, that's an evil shit when they do read about it. But now with the internet, right, they're privy to seeing way more. That's why I fucking North Korea, he can't, doesn't have the fucking internet. He doesn't want them to learn what the fuck's going on

Starting point is 00:55:57 in the world, because they'll all go, what? Yeah. We should leave. We would get the fuck out. Yeah, it's like for me, like my dad beating me and my brother right It's like in my mind. I'm like oh, I'm never gonna do this to another human being But there are some kids that perpetuate that cycle of course to their own children Yeah, I guess I was just have this weird think way of thinking maybe you're lucky that it turned out that way because you could be an abusive

Starting point is 00:56:22 Lunatic too. I think it's now yeah, I think it's luck. It was traumatized into you. No, I just think that way because you could be an abusive lunatic too. I think it's now. Yeah, I think it's luck. It was traumatized into you. No, I just think that some, I don't know. No, I think you're lucky. It's like that. You know, I turned out the other way. I think it's also like this, a built, I don't know, forget it.

Starting point is 00:56:36 What's that comedy? But I, you know, I just want to argue this fact that I see this in, you know, when people get sober, right? It's like last week, some guy just got sober that we know, right? And he was able to go inside himself and go, you know, I think I have a problem. You know, I'm no longer in denial. And I think that if I keep doing this, I can see down the road

Starting point is 00:57:00 that I'm gonna lose everything, so I'll stop here. I've always been like that where I'm like, you know, I haven't lost anything. Like every time I get sober, I haven gonna lose everything, so I'll stop here. I've always been like that, where I'm like, you know, I haven't lost anything. Like every time I get sober, I haven't lost anything, but I can feel in a year or two if this behavior continues, that I will, so I stop it here. And some people don't have that ability,

Starting point is 00:57:16 they just go all the way to the end. They can't help it. And I don't know why that is. Yeah, but some people just have that. That's right, some people just can't help it. And I don't know why that is. Yeah, but some people just have that. That's right. Some people just can't help the way they react to how their inner demons are shortcomings or addictions or things control them. That's my point.

Starting point is 00:57:35 It's some people have traumatic things when they were a kid and it's almost like this deep rooted thing they can't get rid of. And you're very blessed that you're able to shift. I don't think it's a gift. I just don't understand it myself. I. That's why it must be a gift. It's not you. If it's not you, it's something else. It's the Lord. It's the Lord Jesus Christ. The Lord Jesus Christ. I knew it.

Starting point is 00:57:53 It's the Lord Jesus. Our Lord and Savior. Our Lord and Savior. And I'm sorry for that guy who got arrested for being gay on Turkey. You come over here to West Hollywood. Yeah. We'll open our arms and our buttholes to you. And even if you're not, I know he said he's not gay. Yeah, he looks gay, though. He does. Yeah. I mean, I feel like he's lying.

Starting point is 00:58:11 You've been the, have you been the Abbey? I went years and years ago. He's a good Abbey. It was a little underrated. I got hit on like twice. And I was a little let down. I was like twice. So I was, I was wearing a crop top and everything. Really? No. that guy was.

Starting point is 00:58:25 So I went to the abbey with some straight guys and they met with some other gay friends and we're at a table. Straight guy. And one of the guys kind of put his hand on my knee from across the table and I go, oh, no, no. And he goes, oh, I'm sorry, I read it wrong. I just remember that. Oh, yeah.

Starting point is 00:58:43 What do you mean? I think I exude, you know, before people knew whatever I think I exude it. Oh, same. What do you mean? Oh, yeah, one big time. You do big time, yeah. Yeah. If I take you to a gay bar. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, They think I was dropping you on really yeah, I think I would have been like when a domer's guys

Starting point is 00:59:10 No, yeah, because he loved Asians he would have taken you back and be like this once too crazy Too crazy. Yeah, no, but he like really like fit tiny little in shape Asians like little little twinky boys He like twinks you say I wouldn't fit in the drum. He liked yeah, you wouldn't Imagine him like Like a suitcase Yeah, you wouldn't fucking drum imagine him like Yeah, yeah, we have teen drums of This segrell just won't go down Yeah, yeah, I think that I would because because you know, if you watched the show, I think once I saw his hallway and his house,

Starting point is 00:59:50 I would have been like, ah. Yeah, but they were enamored with this guy. They thought he was cute. He was like a hot cool guy. Yeah, right. He was cute. He was charming. Yeah, yeah. War workmen's boots, you know.

Starting point is 00:59:59 That thing we listened to, that's Spotify. No, that's the, no, the, no, the, no, the, no, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, with the math. Yeah, the most great story on the math about this about a guy who was who had an interaction with Dhammer Yeah, so he's basically you guys know about us. Yeah, we were in the car. Yeah, yeah for anyone that's listening now give it to me It's a basically a guy that's he's it was talking about something that happened in the 80s He didn't really come out and somebody suggested he should go to this gay bar So when did this gay bar in Wisconsin and this guy should come in? And when you're listening to the thing,

Starting point is 01:00:29 you don't think it's about Dahmer. And he's like, I started dressing like him. And he's like, why won't he hit on me? And he was always leaving with other guys. And then a couple of years later, he was like teaching in New York and he saw the news. And saying, how would say it is that? He was coming into a sexual revolution

Starting point is 01:00:45 as a college man who was becoming, you're coming out of the class. Yeah, it's a great math story. And I was wondering, you know, where, how many brushes of death I have made? I have made, I have never known that. How many suracles have I walked by? Not even knowing.

Starting point is 01:01:00 Maybe not, well also just like moments in life you could have died. Yeah, like a second's away from it. I don't even, I'd be left instead of right. You don't really hear about serial killers no more. Hi. Yeah, they've got one that's active now. There's one right now. Really? Who? What's his name? The guy that's out there, he's doing his thing. So there's a, look at this. There's a, what's it called? Gildo beat serial killer suspect Rex Howerman.

Starting point is 01:01:20 Yeah. Uh, serial, Texas serial killer. Please, guilty tomorrow. There's so many. There's so many, there's too many, that's why. I thought there was none. You think it was a fat? I liked my reality 10 seconds ago. No, it's not there. I thought they were solved, eh?

Starting point is 01:01:34 Well, I think the problem is there's a mistake of thinking that Syraculop has to be this like famous, notorious and killed hundreds or whatever, but a lot of these guys, they just killed dozens of them. They're not as talented. No, they're not as good. They're getting caught. I mean, let's be honest.

Starting point is 01:01:49 Are they not as good or are they going to be caught fast? They're not F1 drivers, you know? They're the NASCAR of kill. They're the NASCAR of serial kill. It's dark, it's dark, but there are ones that are, you know, you could see. They got potential. They got potential.

Starting point is 01:02:04 They just have their own thing going. I mean, you got to be really good right now. Yeah, John Ways, Wayne Gacy, the clown stuff. So good. Hiding the bodies inside his mom's house. So good. In the walls of her home. Underneath.

Starting point is 01:02:16 Very good. You can't do that anymore though. Well, there's friends. Yeah. On us too hard. Cameras. Yeah, we talk about it like we were going to try. Yeah, there's too much.

Starting point is 01:02:25 Like, do you think if the zodiac, because they have never caught them, the zodiac, you think if it happened now that we built a catch them? Yeah. I think so. But also, I think sometimes like simple shit can get, like the woman at the, one of the dealers at the casino, a guy that was in my table made a joke,

Starting point is 01:02:39 he goes, what if I just grabbed that whole train just ran out of here? And he goes, yeah, I'd get tackled or shot right away, right? And she goes, yeah, but we had a guy not too long ago grabbed a whole tray, ran outside into a car that was waiting in like one of the turnarounds and actually got away. But at the place where he was sitting, you know, because he was sitting fake and playing cards for a while, he left his ID. I just thought she was like, yeah, yeah, even the cop was like

Starting point is 01:03:06 He's like the joke relieving his calling card. Yeah, well that's happened before but killer is leaving their license or the wallet at the fucking crime scene What are you don't bring it? Yeah, don't bring it. Well, and why do you have your actual ID? Yeah, yeah You're not gonna get carted you're 40. Yeah, you're fine You imagine a killer goes into a place, he gets carted and he's like, I forgot it's like, why is he like, I'm going in there to kill somebody. I don't wanna leave any of it. The honest killer.

Starting point is 01:03:31 Yeah. And the bouncing figure. All right, get in there, man. I can't help anybody. I don't like the fact that I've been in groups of people where everybody gets carted and then they look at me and they go, go ahead, man.

Starting point is 01:03:44 And you just cart me anyway. go, go ahead, man. And you just cart me anyway. No, I'm in line. No, but they're saying they probably recognize you. Cause you're famous. No, cause I have an old face. I got an old weather face to get carted sometimes. That's cause they want to make sure it's you.

Starting point is 01:03:56 They're like, is this that guy? Because all Asians look alike. They're like, this just could be another Asian. Right, tell me I'm wrong. They literally go in sample. Two Shay. In sample. All I'm gonna say is two Shay.

Starting point is 01:04:08 Good luck with that. That's interesting. Maybe you're right. I think you know, you're one of those guys. I want to a cocaine party on Saturday night. Wait, wait, come on. I don't know how interesting it is though. No, I know.

Starting point is 01:04:22 cocaine parties are always interesting. It might end nowhere, but yeah, I want to a billionaire's house and, uh, and party. Did you wait saturday night? I smoked up in Austin. I didn't do in Austin. In Austin. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:04:34 So Joe Rogan's house and did cocaine. No, no, no. So you went, you did a show. I'm hanging out with Tony Hengecliffe. Yeah. He's got a billionaire friend. He takes me in a bunch of comics. We go to this beautiful house.

Starting point is 01:04:44 Elon Musk. How many people are there? 50? Hot chicks? Yeah. Hot dudes? All the chicks are hot. They're like all from different countries. Wow.

Starting point is 01:04:55 I'm like, they're looking at me like, what is it? You know? But then they get to talk. Why is this servant in street clothes? Yeah. But then by conversation, they're like, is that energy generous? I was dancing for you dancing. Oh, yeah, they all thought I was Ellen.

Starting point is 01:05:13 I was just a joke. Okay, but I leaned in. Yeah, be honest. Did you go skiing? No, no, no, but it was everywhere. You didn't hit the slopes? Uh, no, no, no, Jess, you can be the best at that. I used to do it. I'm all, I'm all, no coke near you. No, I can't.

Starting point is 01:05:29 Honestly, if you ever did it and you died from fentanyl overdose or whatever, I would be so mad at you. I know. Don't do it. Let's test it. Kettamine. Oh yeah, you can test it. You can test it.

Starting point is 01:05:39 Or end getting our can. You're fine. Go do coke. I can't. It's too addictive. I used to do so much of it. Yeah, really spectacular. Even when I saw it at the party, I was like, I could, had to hold my body.

Starting point is 01:05:47 Were all the hot model chicks doing Coke? I, I didn't actually like see people doing the Coke. It was just like on the table. Who's just obviously conversations were there too. Could I, if I was there and I was using, do I have to ask, or can I just do it? If you were there. Like, I could do you go, who's this?

Starting point is 01:06:04 No, it was like, it looks like. Excuse me. Yeah. Whose coke is this? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Is this your coke? Yeah. Can I get, is that cool?

Starting point is 01:06:12 Okay. That's what I would do. No. You wouldn't do, so there's coke at the, what if somebody, you were like, if you were,

Starting point is 01:06:19 well then you go like, and you just put it right back out. Sorry, my bad. Yeah, yeah. If you showed up to a party and they knew you were using it, yeah, everybody would be giving you a coat. You would leave with extra Coke. Could I be like to go back?

Starting point is 01:06:29 Could I shoot heroin right there or not? To go back? And a Coke party, can you shoot heroin? No, it's a little faux pas. It is? That's what I thought. Probably gonna go. What other does it like ice?

Starting point is 01:06:39 What's ice? Everybody wants to smoke ice, meth. There was a cocaine without like a bullet chips, like anyone could go like that. Wow. And there was a, that cocaine was out like a bullet chips, like anyone could go in. Wow. And there was a DJ who played like guitar and, but DJ and, and sing and. He was on cocaine.

Starting point is 01:06:52 Yeah. Any guy that's doing that much, me too. I'm going, I think I'm going in a couple of weeks I'm going to Austin. I want to ask, you are? Yeah, I'm going to go at the end of the year. Tony, I want to ask Tony if he's going to take me to a cocaine party.

Starting point is 01:07:03 No, just to, yeah, I'm not going to do it. Don't go to that house. What? I want to see what it's like. Too much there. Too much available. Carlos is nodding his head. He knows. Yeah, don't hang out with fucking Tony in Austin. Why? He's fun to hang out with. No, I'm saying don't go to the co-house is what I'm saying.

Starting point is 01:07:12 I'm saying don't go to the co-house. Was William Montgomery there? No, no. William is sober. He has skin cancer. He went and got it removed though. Oh, good. Thank God.

Starting point is 01:07:22 Jesus Christ. Melanoma. Yeah. But he's so good. He's so good. He's so good. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. It's a lump, yeah. Underneath inside your skin, you gotta go get a check down. Why? Bobby. Take a guess why. What if you have lymphatic cancer or something like that? That's where your lymph nodes are.

Starting point is 01:07:53 Underneath your armpits. It's dying down. Oh, it's gone down? A little bit. No, you're fine, don't worry about it. You go get a check down. I went to the doctor, I had to go get, you know, hard to answer him to call.

Starting point is 01:08:01 He called me and was like, Oh man, your fucking, your levels are elevated. I was like, what? Yeah. It's such a bummer to like hear it. Yeah. He's like, I had to go get, you know, hard to answer him to call. He called me and was like, oh man, your fucking, your levels are elevated. I was like, what? Yeah. It's such a bummer to like hear it. Yeah. He's like, I had to put you on cholesterol medication. I'm sorry.

Starting point is 01:08:10 He said, and he said your sugars were high. I was like, I don't even eat sugar. Yeah. I don't even eat sugar. Carbs. Huh? Carbs, I don't eat that many carbs. Skinnier than you, fat ass.

Starting point is 01:08:19 But could I be honest with, I think I need you guys to really push me into getting healthier. Really? I'm at the level. Hike with me. No, he's not going to do that. No, I'm at a level. Well, let's find something.

Starting point is 01:08:31 I can feel my body. I don't feel right. Yoga, you said you want to do that. That'll make you feel so good. You'll see. I honestly need help. I don't feel good. Let's start a program.

Starting point is 01:08:41 We'll start a program. I really don't feel good. Like, neck hurts. I'm groggy. I should look. Let's start a program. We'll start a program. I really don't feel good. Like, neck hurts. I'm groggy. I should look. Let's start a program. What should I be? The Bobby Health E-Le.

Starting point is 01:08:49 The, uh-oh, hot dog workout program. I just did Dylan Francis's music video and had a dance in it. And it was like exhausting. Not just, I almost died. Well, how about this? If you are bad friends out there and you have any health tips for Bobby, please let us know about your health tips. I need help.

Starting point is 01:09:03 We really need to know how we can get him back to square one. Ooh, I have one idea. Give Andrew full control of your door dash account and any food delivery account. It's actually very interesting. And anytime you're hungry, you hit me up in order for you. It's actually fucking brilliant.

Starting point is 01:09:18 What? It's actually fucking brilliant. I have to get my pink berry. Well, you work out the deal with him. You might be the only guy in LA that still eats ping-barry. Eugene too. We're addicted to it. It's you too. We love it. It's dog shit. I think I think the market share showed how bad it was. No, I think I opened a thousand. They have like four left. It's a nostalgia. Yeah, it's dog shit. Yeah. Is it ice cream? No, no, it's a shame. It's disgusting. It's not

Starting point is 01:09:43 disgusting. You get the malt crunch with it What is it? Pinkberry with all kinds frozen yogurt. It was it was like a tart tart frozen yogurt Yeah, yeah, yeah, and there was a hype for it when I first moved to LA it became like a big thing And they owe me a million and they shut down because we can Starbucks bought it No, it's because everyone realized it was shit and they were like fuck this. Let's just have ice cream anyway, oh I'll give you my ice cream for life. What would you order? For life.

Starting point is 01:10:09 You're gonna get a solid every once in a while. I'm gonna get you, yeah. I think it'd be more of a stricting. Jersey Mike's gonna get that. No, no, no. I'm gonna read you what I get. You can get subbed to tub. Yeah, no, that's so disgusting.

Starting point is 01:10:21 What's the subbed to tub? It's literally like all the ingredients for the sub, but in a plastic tin. In a tub. Instead of a... No bread. Okay. There's the sub-in-a-top? It's literally like all the ingredients for the sub, but in a plastic tin. In a tub. Instead of a... No bread. No bread. Okay.

Starting point is 01:10:29 There's sub-in-a-top right there. It's actually delicious. It looks so gross. It's just a salad. That's sub-in-a-top. What's wrong with that? It's just... It's just...

Starting point is 01:10:37 It's just the ingredients without bread. Okay. Look at the second one. That's sub-in-a-top. That's traditional how they do it. It's like a turkey one. Okay, I'll get sub-in-a-top. I've gotten it before. It's not second one. That's sub-entitled. That's a traditional how they do it with a Kentucky one. Okay, I'll get sub-entitled. I've gotten it before. It's not that big. It's actually great. All right. Okay. Anyway, thank you for being a bad friend. Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!

Starting point is 01:11:05 Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!

Starting point is 01:11:13 Woo!

Bad Friends - You're A Good Boy, Bobby Lee!

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