Bad Hasbara - The World's Most Moral Podcast - Bad Hasbara 74: Green Book For War Criminals, with Gianmarco Soresi

Episode Date: January 9, 2025

Matt and Daniel are joined by comedian Gianmarco Soresi to talk the IDF’s “most moral army” moniker, whether Wicked has zionist implications, and a travel guide for evading prosecution when traveling as a war criminal.Please donate to ANERA at https://www.anera.org/Keep up with Gianmarco Soresi at https://www.gianmarcosoresi.com/Subscribe to the Patreon https://www.patreon.com/badhasbaraSubscribe/listen to Bad Hasbara wherever you get your podcasts.Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5RDvo87OzNLA78UH82MI55Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-hasbara-the-worlds-most-moral-podcast/id1721813926Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/bad-hasbara/donationsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Moshwamah bitch, a ribbon polo We invented the cherry tomato And weighs USG drives and the iron d'o Israeli salad, oozy stents and jopas orange rose Micro chips is us iPhone cameras us Taco salads us Pothomas us

Olive Garden us White foster us Zabrahamas Asvaras Hello, everyone, and welcome to Bad Hasbara. Most Moral podcast, Us. I'm going to groove into that. Hell yeah.

We have the best theme song. It's such a good theme song. I mean, sometimes I wish that I could learn the technology to put it online as like a Spotify song. The hogs have been baying for it. Do hogs bay? Hogs squeal. I'm not sure who bays. There might be a donkey planted among our hogs because someone's been banged for it.

Get out, donkeys. We're a hogs-only pig farm here. I am your world's most moral co-host Matt Lieb. I'm Daniel Mate, likewise most moral. We are both moral. We are both grateful for you for being here in 2025 watching slash listening to another episode of Bad Asbarra. As much as we regret the necessity of us being here in 2025.

Yep. That wasn't the idea. Wasn't the plan. The plan was when this started was, I don't know, about four or five episodes in, there wouldn't be any more Zionism. No. Make a few dick jokes, have a bromance and Zionism. Yeah.

Stop the genocide. Stop the, and then kiss. And then kiss. And it didn't happen. And, you know, it's a bummer. but we're here, and Trump's sadly giving us a four-season renewal. That's right, folks. We've got a long, long way to go.

The Trump administration is going to show Biden how Zionism is done. And we're all very... Is you're going to rename the Gulf of Mexico, the Gulf of America? Is he? That's what he said. Can you rename the Gulf? I didn't even know you could do that. I assumed it was a shared gulf.

In fact, I thought it was Mexico's Gulf. That's insane. Well, anyways, we should name the country the Gulf of America is what we should do. Give us five stars in a review on all of the podcast, platforms. If you're on Spotify, give us five stars. Write a comments in the episode and be like,

hey, that was good. If you write something bad, I'll find you. Also, subscribe. Subscribe on YouTube. Subscribe on YouTube. Yeah, if you haven't done. And then also, of course, please subscribe to our Patreon. Patreon.com slash Bad Hasbara.

We have some amazing guests who will, just by scheduling alone, are going to end up being Patreon exclusive people. And so you really don't want to miss it. It's going to be great. And I will not cave to pressure and give it to you for free. No. There is a paywall, and it is based on scheduling. I'm sorry.

Very excited for that. Today's episode is brought to you by Anira, A-N-E-R-A. So Anira is an organization that has been helping refugees and others affected by conflicts in the Middle East since 1968. They have no political or religious affiliations and are currently working in both Palestine and Lebanon providing necessary meals, hygiene, and living supplies. So before you decide to give us some money for bonus episodes instead, why don't you go ahead and donate at aneera.org, A-N-E-R-A-D-O-G, give them the money they need it more than we do, and they are a good cause.

Shout out to producing them. Helping them as a meal, helping us is the dessert. That's right. Very good. They should put that in their slogan. Shout out to producer Adam Levin for always giving us. these great organizations that we are calling out to donate to. And also for being on the ones and twos up here in the kairons,

making jokes, fucking working hard, you know, producer shit. Daniel, what's the spin? Today, the spin, I got three little selections. This one just arrived in the mail from Japan. And I was shocked that I had to order away to Japan for it. but it's very, very rare, and that's Beck's mellow gold. Wait. You can't find it on vinyl.

Really? Yeah, there's a kind of dead zone in the early 90s. The 90s, yeah. Where, like, some, you know, Indigo Girls, for instance, their best album, Rites of Passage came out in 92. You can't find it on fucking vinyl. Wow. This one I had to get from Japan,

and it came with this little cute origami crane and a nice little note in Japanese inflected English typed up, very nicely saying, thank you for dealing, thank you for helping me deal with you or something like that. Anyway, got this nice little, in Japanese's, thank you for helping me deal with you. I'm such pleasure to deal with you.

Anyway, I love it. So I'm an peridador. I'm a loser, baby. So why don't you subscribe to my podcast? I got Chromacopia, Tyler the creator's latest. Oh, okay. L.A., incredible hauteur rapper.

Yeah. Great album, just a great album. Okay. And this is copy number 73,665. I think it's a limited pressing. I've never really listened to Tyler, the creator. I've heard he's good. He's always kind of reminded me.

He's like, he's like adult. He's like grown-up Gambino. You know what I mean? That's kind of, I've always put them in the same category, childish Gambino and Tyler the creator, kind of like. I don't know Donald Glover's rap stuff so well. I would recommend listening to flower Boy by Tyler the Creator full title scum fuck flower boy great album

Igor is another great album and this one is fantastic his early stuff had a lot of shock humor in it right right right right some of which was some of which was dated the minute it came out of his mouth some of it was just wonderful he has a he had a great line on one album on one song that starts with I'm a fucking walking paradox no I'm not just a terrific opening great that's great and then I've got this beautiful late 70s, early 80s record by the Rance Allen group. I think they're from Detroit. I might be wrong about that.

The Rance Allen Group sounds like a hedge fund. I know. I know. But they're actually a gospel trio. Oh, shit. The three brothers, I think. Anyway, the reason I chose this. Yeah, weapons manufacturer.

Thank you, Adam. But actually, that's an on-point mistake because the song that is on here, I couldn't believe it when I heard it. I just picked this up at a records. I'm taking a DJ class at a local record store. Shout out to Superior Elevation Records in East Williamsburg. And I picked this up.

Actually, my girlfriend Hadar picked it up off the shelf for me. And when I put it on, I couldn't believe there was a song called Cease Fire. That is My Desire. Oh, shit. Okay. And it's for that reason that's the spin today. What are what conflict they were talking about? They were talking about all the conflicts of the world.

Oh, okay. The lyrics are all just about, you know, how, you know, it's like we're living in some Hollywood shoot-em-up movie and, you know, to stop the, it's just a general ceasefire. General ceasefire, yeah. Like, hey, you there with a fire, cut it out. But it's very sad that it could have been talking about something to do with the Israeli occupation and it would not be, that would not be dated. no no it wouldn't evergreen is the thing with israeli occupation at least in our lifetime uh so that's that's the spin that's what's been spinning uh get those records i love mellow gold uh i love i love anything i actually i'm to be honest when it comes to be back uh i'm a sea change slash uh morning

what is it morning phase morning phase you like his serious stuff i just i just i just like him singing with the guitar. Sorry, my daughter got me sick again. No, actually, this one wasn't my daughter. This was, I think, just me being out in the world doing stand-up. So, thank you, comics. You're dirtier than a child. Speaking of

comics who are dirtier than a child, we have a great I'm sorry. We have a great guest today. I've been trying to get him on this podcast for a while and due to the fact that I am terrible at booking, it has taken me forever to give him an actual date. But I did it this

and he's hilarious stand-up comedian. He is Jewish. He is Italian. He is funny. What? You can be both? You can be both at the same time. Isn't that crazy?

Does that where pizza bagels come from? That is where pizza. I think the first pizza bagel was an Italian Jew. It was just like, I have an idea for a business. And not just a business, but like finally resolving his own identity issues. He brought it into his therapist. I've figured it out. but I no longer have to be tortured inside.

I can be all of me. When pizza's on a bagel, you can read Torah anytime. Ladies and gentlemen, everyone else, please welcome to the podcast. Gianmarco Soresi. I'm sorry. Can I say it like that?

Is that offensive? Can I tell you this is bitchy of me? So there was a comedian who the only way he'd say hi to me. He didn't really talk to me, he'd see me, he'd go, Jamarco, and he'd do that forever, Jewish, Jewish comedian. And then, you know, I think he saw some of my jokes critical of Israel, never spoke to me again. And honestly, if that's all I got out of it, what a victory. Because I was, I, I, every time, so it's fine that you say it, as long as that's not, that's not it.

Right, right. Yeah, yeah, no. I mean, it's, it's difficult, though, with. the name, John Marco, to not do it like that. Because what is the Americanized version? John Marco? Yeah, yeah. My dad, who's barely, you know, he's, I'm not that Italian. He told me it was Gian Marco my whole life.

And then I met an Italian and they were like, no, that's wrong. Yeah. I love that level of Italian identity where you're basically just an American and you're like, no, but I'm going to name my son something super woppy. It's going to be Daego. It's going to be WAP. It's going to be all those things. And I'm allowed to say that.

My wife is a Dago Wap. Sure, sure. I had an old manager, and this was when I was doing nothing. And they wanted me to change my name to something more Jewish. They acted like, they were like, we're going to get you a meeting. They're going to expect Jamarco to walk in. And then, you know, Jean-Marco is going to come in. And they'll be shocked.

But I kept it. You did. And I like it a lot. And, yeah, it was interesting. You know, I'd seen your stand up before, you know, before October 7th. And I didn't know, I think I didn't know that you were Jewish until after the fact, once you started criticizing Israel. And I was just like, look at this guy. He's got, you know, he's Italian and he's Jewish.

This guy and he's criticizing Israel? What can't he do? So I'd love to, well first, let me play a little bit of your stand-up because I want our viewers to see it. I'm Jewish on my mom's side, Italian on my dad's side. I'm part of a secret group that runs the world's plumbing. That's an example of an anti-Semitic joke. And I bring that up because that's what anti-Semitism used to me.

They used to be, you'd say, oh, Jews, they run the banks, they run Hollywood, the wrong chief, they all have big noses. But then something changed. Something changed. And now the anti-Semitism seems to be criticizing Israel in any way, shape, or form. Which feels different. I mean, now if you say something like, oh, I think Israel should stop bombing innocent civilians, some people are like, uh, that's a stereotype.

not all Jews shouldn't bomb innocent civilians that is that's a great bit that is really funny I also very much like your bit when you said that you know

it's not that Biden's completely losing it memory-wise he's never missed a payment to Israel yes so I want to ask you being a comic in New York who's, you know, talking, has jokes criticizing Israel. Other than your experience with the guy who was saying your name raciously and then

stopped talking to you completely, have you had any other negative experiences from this? Is Noam Dorman banging on your door, haranguing you? I saw him and Dave Smith going on. Yeah, here and there, here and there he wants to have a conversation. Of course. Of course. No, I honestly think the, you know, the biggest thing, I've got messages and emails and all that stuff. Sure.

And I know some people have written my girlfriend about it, which I think that's the one that gets under my skin a little bit more. But I think the biggest one, the biggest one was, hey, right, in my neighborhood in Bensonhurst, you want to talk to me? about being a self-hating Jew, you come to my fucking face. You don't go on my fucking, my fucking gumma. Exactly. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, terrible.

I thought it was great. But I think the one, the biggest one, the one that felt like more significant to my day-to-day life was, there was a comedy club. It was a West Side Comedy Club where the Booker

of that club basically was calling out a comedian Jeffrey Asmus who I've always admired Jeffrey Asmus a great deal

and was basically she wrote the comedy seller saying you know are you still booking this yeah stop book this guy

yeah and I think I just first of all I mean I made me furious of course the idea of bookers reaching out to other bookers We're so helpless as stand-up comedians until a certain point.

Yeah. And I think I just felt that real power of I'm as a Jewish person, I am able to face the charge of, oh, you're being anti-Semitic, a lot more head-on. And, you know, of course, we'll say you're a self-hating Jew, all that stuff. But I think it just felt a real place where I said, oh, I can really speak my mind on this. we are, it's harder to leverage that charge against me as a Jewish person and to see a comedian that I admire tremendously possibly having his, I would say livelihood if any of these comedy clubs were paying enough for a livelihood. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's more like emotional livelihood when

it comes to getting booked at a club for $25 a set. Although, does the seller pay 50? Sellers, seller, in terms of New York comedy club, seller is on the higher end. end of stuff. Hell yeah. But I just felt like, I think just a new kind of boldness in this realm that I hadn't felt before where I felt I could really stand up for my beliefs, both both in terms of, you know, criticizing Israel, but also as a comedian and really going like, this is the free speech stuff that, you know, all these other comics have been whining about going, oh, I can't

can't be as transphobic as I want to be. Right. The leather jacket guys. Yeah. Yeah. I love that. That brand of comic has been so quiet about Israel. Oh my God.

It's insane. It's fucking insane. They wouldn't shut the fuck up about not being able to speak their mind. And then the moment it affects the booker at some of these comedy clubs, they're silent. Yeah. So that was infuriating. I love Ricky Jervais, you know. He's like tweeting in a bathtub like, oh, you know,

If it was me there over the Golden Globes, I'll be giving all them people what for. And it's like, you can't claim anymore that you are being censored or that you are like, you know, oh, is this too, it's just too edgy when you have not said word one about an act of genocide. I'm sorry, it's bullshit. I guess Dave Smith would be the exception to that rule,

you know, who is also Jewish himself. That's true. That's true. Dave Smith is. Who traffics in that sort of. Yeah. That world yet has made a point of, you know, he's one of the few, one of the few, you know, so credit where credit is due,

he actually does say something. But yeah. I think it's hard for stay. I mean, I don't know how you feel, Matt, but I think it can be hard with stand-up because I never, I never wanted my comedy to be political.

Oh, I'm right or I'm good or I'm morally correct. If anything, I wanted to point out or lean into, like, I'm a piece of shit. I mean, like, that's more vulnerable to me. Yeah, yeah, of course. I always think it's been treated, you know, I, I kind of released most of the stuff that I had where I felt like the point of view that I was able to call attention to was, I think, American Jews acting like they've suffered the most in all of this. They're the ones who have faced the greatest degree of anti-Semitism. And that was like the area that I felt

I felt most comfortable in terms of like, I'm in it, I'm an American Jew, I have friends, I see the way that they're speaking about this, and that's where my angle fit, where I could talk in a way that wasn't just preachy, but was comedic too. But it can be a tough needle to thread because it's so easy to be preachy in a way that I don't think necessarily is stand-up comedy per se. It's tough. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not a comic, but there's some joke to be made about the whole would you hide me thing and be like, well, I might, but not if you act like that.

You know, I would have hid you, but keep asking me if I'd hide you, I'm getting less and less inclined. I'm like, no, you go take your chances out there on the street. Yeah, no, when I saw that, it was like Amy Schumer doing a Would You Hide Me on Instagram. And I was like, bitch, I will block you. Yeah. But I will not hide you. Yeah, it's interesting because it's like with comedy in general, like the more the more politics forward it is, the more it feels like you are placing yourself as the good guy. And I think there's nothing I hate more than political comedy in which you present yourself as the good guy. There is obviously, of course, the opposite of that where people place themselves as the bad guy. But if there's a good angle, I'd much rather hear someone. being a bad guy. I'd rather, I'd rather hear someone with a really good, edgy joke than someone

who's just like, I'm good. Why isn't everyone good like me? I'll tell you. I had an experience recently that I handled it, I think, as best I could, but I was on stage in Brooklyn. And I was doing like, you know, I have some jokes about religion. And it really was, you know, it was religion as a whole. And there was one particular joke where I talk, it's like, it's like Jews, Christians, Muslims, all this together, and then I make a twist that I don't want to give away. But a white woman approached the stage right after that joke and put down a kufia on the stage and said, do you know what that is? Are white women throwing their kufias at you?

Yeah, yeah. That's not life. That's that comic life, baby. And it was like, it was one of these moments where I didn't, I wanted, if I could somehow figure out a way to, you know, make fun of her, but, but I didn't want to make fun of the cause, but it was like, I was trapped, it was trapped in this thing where I became very, um, I was like, oh, it's beautiful. I, I, I agree with you on, on what I think it is you're trying to do right now. And I, I think you're just doing it because I said, I'm Jewish,

which that's not, that's, it was one of those moments where it was like activism for a cause, I believed in, but in a way that I don't, think was particularly effective in that moment. Yes. I didn't really, it wasn't like, it was a 10 minute set. I'll be fine. Yeah. But it really was a moment where my, I always feel like my challenge with comedy is there's

just that feeling of wanting to express my views and the things that I think are right. And then, you know, be a comedian. And it was tough to be funny in that, in that moment. Yeah. And I've made the mistake before. Like I, I always remember once. I had a joke about Brittany Griner being released from the Rush. And the joke was a twist and, you know, whatever.

But I was in South Carolina. And I said, Brittany Griner was released from prison. And someone in the back went, boo. And suddenly I lost the comedian in me. And I said, it's so great. I said, I actually think it's good when Americans are released from foreign prisons. And the whole audience was like, oh, God, the principal's in the room. We got to watch the principal headline now.

And it was such a moment where I like, I failed to be a comedian, but I don't, I didn't, I was mad at him. I was mad at him. I was like, fuck you. Did you follow it up? You say, sir, jokes are a privilege, not a right. It sucks when you, when this is the problem with this podcast as well. And like, it just, you know, following this is, is that there are, there are sometimes when. I see like a Michael Rappaport tweet where the only thing that I want to quote tweet him is, I hope you die. Because he'll say something so awful that I can't even think of a fucking joke. Like he did a tweet recently.

It was a bunch of like gauze and children in the rain. And he goes, why doesn't Hamas let them in the tunnels? And I was just like, you are tweeting this at fucking about kids. I hope I wish you death. I wish death upon you. And I know that's bad and not funny, so I didn't quote tweet that. And it's hard.

It's hard when... I don't know if it's bad. I mean, I wouldn't say this. Yeah, it's not bad. But it's not exactly dry. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's sort of a sin against your, against your comedic craft, isn't it?

You want to be able to keep your powder dry. You want to be able to keep that, that vantage point. There's nothing funny about real anger. You know what I mean? Like, there's nothing about real, like, impotent anger can be funny, but a real, like, I hope you die. It's not funny. Unless you do it with like a bobcat goldweight voice. Yeah, yeah.

You have to filter it through a kind of insanity. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it is hard. Being angry and trying to be funny can be a challenge. That's George Carlin's whole. I feel like with the first George Carlin album, my mom got me. I was like 14. It was the one where every setup was, here's a group of people.

that should have a nail shoved up their nose until blood comes out of their eyeballs. And I remember, I mean, it really, it was right as he was starting to enter his, he was too angry to be funny. Yeah. And I don't blame him. I mean, I think that could be the start of a great Michael Rappaport fit. Yeah. Yeah.

No, it is hard. I will say that, like, when it comes to, like, watching political comedians, you know, like classic political comedians and people love like George Carlin like I get that people like him but he's he's like one of those guys where I'm like I guess you had to be there where I just I don't

I don't I get why he's a good writer but I'm like I don't I think with Carlin you have to not that I'm a historian of comedy but I think you probably have to imagine a world in which he doesn't exist and then he comes along and does that

and then you have to think about there's that and then it's kind of like the change bank saturday night live uh commercial how do they make a profit volume he creates these rants and it's the sheer voluminousness oh for sure stamina and the you know he starts with bits like you know your stuff my stuff whatever the repetitiveness and the kind of prodigious ability the just the gift of gab in itself and then you combine that with the anger and the and the the the the calling out the power centers or whatever I listened my I listened to young enough that I think it still felt revolutionary in a way that it does like when I was 13 I remember in this album it was a little much but he was like there's no God that never was a God that never will be a God and I was just like oh oh what I didn't know this is funny and I'm scared what happens in when you die you're rot the ground uh yeah no it's uh yeah trying to make comedy political I always feel like the When the politics are worn on the sleeve, it just immediately, it's like you say you're getting yelled at by the principal.

All right, guys. Why don't we just shit on Richard Pryor next to what other comedy? No, Lenny Bruce. I mean, if you want to talk about, I mean, Lenny Bruce was, if you listen to that, you're like, Jesus, where's the fucking joke? But I do think, I do think Lenny Bruce, I think his politics would have still been pretty good today. Yeah, I would, you know, I'd hope so. I mean, I think, you know, sort of the same with Carlin. And I also definitely think the same with Bill Hicks.

The funniest thing about Bill Hicks is that Bill Higgs has been fucking co-opted by the right. You always see, like, the worst right winger ever will have like a Bill Hicks smoking a cigarette meme. And I was like, you know he hates you, right? I mean, he would have if he hadn't died. Well, let's get into a little Hasbara. I want to ask, growing up, were you, what was your thoughts on Israel and how do they change before we get into Hezbar? I mean, listen, I'll be, I'll be really blunt in terms of I, my mom, her parents told her she could

either, my mom's the Jewish one, they told her she could either have a bat mitzvah or a really big sweet 16. And she, she had the foresight at 12, I guess, to pick the sweet 16. So she really, you know, we, we never talked about it. Considerably, considerably less studying required for a really good tweet. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So I honestly, we didn't talk, there was not a moment talking about Israel when I was when I was a kid. We didn't talk about, you know, it wasn't a great

family situation. So we didn't talk about anything geopolitical. Certainly not Israel. And then, you know, I will confess that I went to college from musical theater. So it was very much politically out of the loop. It wasn't until really the last, I think since 2016, that I really started to understand or learn more about the world. But I did the birthright trip in my early 20s because that was my introduction to Israel. Someone told me, they said, did you know you can get this free trip? And I was like, that can't be true. And I looked it up and I was like, oh, my God. And truly, I can only plead

ignorance in terms of that's all I knew is that there's this place and I could go on a free trip and I was a broke actor and I said great let's let's do it do they have a birthright especially for theater kids or musical theater kids because that would be very smart you could just tailor it you know I'll be real with you every birthright trip is just for theater kids it is okay that's that's just how it that's how it's built I mean listen I birthright is just like what if all if I all of the Jewish camp songs that you remember growing up was a whole country, and we're all going to sing them together as adults. It's basically cats with a cake.

That's right. That's right. Exactly. So I just remember, like, even in college, I went to a musical theater conservatory, there was a teacher who was Jewish who would do, like, big Passover meals and whatnot. And I wasn't invited. They, they, and I, there was a friend of mine, and I, I, there was a friend of mine, and I, We've talked about it since, but he said to me, he's like, we are not really Jewish.

And there was kind of a weird, I never, I never grew up with enough holiday celebrating that I was, like, drawn to it. But I still felt like I'm a Jew, you know, and I felt like I comedically, I think my mom had a kind of negativity and complaining that is culturally Jewish. Yeah, sure. And you're holococally Jewish because your mom is. Jewish, so you are actually Jewish. I say culturally Jewish, it means I have all the anxiety of regular Judaism, but without the sweet comfort of God. And that's how I, so, you know, I would be drawn to Jews and we would talk and we would

complain and I felt like I, my, you know, it was there. And so then I did the birthright trip, but I'd always been allergic to religion, period. And maybe that was the George Carlin. And maybe that's just in my nature. But I really, I really hated the assumed brotherhood. I did not like what Hasidic Jews would come up and say, are you Jewish? It felt, it always struck me as, you know, I grew up in D.C. I certainly was taught a lot about white privilege.

And to me, there was always a degree of, well, this does feel like an offshoot of being white in America. And, oh, white person, we're a brotherhood. I always felt the stink of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so even when I did the birthright trip, I met people where Judaism was way more of a thing to them. It was a New York birthright trip. There was a very loose sense of like, well, I do believe in a two-state solution.

Sure. But neglecting to reflect on any points of why that didn't seem to be the way things were going at all. Or who the other state would be populated by and what happened to them and where are they now? And what would need to change from their current situation? Yeah, a general loose liberalism that made you feel like you were on the right side of things without reflecting over any of the steps that would need to occur or why it was not how all these things. And I always remember that like, you know, because on the trip they have. some members your age from the IDF who like join in for like half the trip.

And even they, they spoke of the two state solutions. So it felt like in my younger version of myself where it was kind of you were either a Democrat or a Republican, you're either a liberal or conservative. I felt like these were the, you know, on the more ethical side of things. Sure. And again, that's because I truly knew so. So little. And even the trip, I picked the one that that was the least religious I could find. There were different themed. There wasn't a theater kid version. I'm sure there will be someday.

And, you know, Kevin Spacey will lead a workshop because this is where he can go to his movies. That's my, honestly, my fear is that Israel is going to go take all the, all the quote unquote, canceled actors in America and will just have the most star-studded propaganda films, in your entire life. Yes, I know. They literally just take everyone from Glenn Gary, Glenn Ross, and make the Israeli version of it.

I'm sure. I'm sure they have reached out to Woody Allen and said, can you make our Manhattan but for Tel Aviv? I know it. Kevin Spacey as Ehud Barak, when Arafat says, why won't you give us a two-state solution?

A two-state... Kevin Spacey says, because I don't like you. Glenn Gary, Glenn and Ross. Yeah, that has been a fear I've had, too, especially they're like, you know, Brett Ratner is there and fucking like, and now Kevin, is Kevin Spacey? Did he relocate to Israel?

He took some picture there. I saw a picture there. Tiffany Haddish was there. And you thought the Jews read Hollywood before, just wait. Tarantino's been there without getting canceled. Yeah, preemptively. Like they're going to find out about the feet picks, the underage feet that I've been into. Yeah, it is, that is, that's also been my fear.

Well, you brought up talking about people going up to you on the street and asking if you're Jewish, you know, these are like the Khabadniks, right? Very recently. I wish those guys, it, the thing that annoys me about those guys, by the way. Yeah. If you're going to ask me if I'm Jewish, what's my incentive to say yes? You're going to shove a fucking big stock of lemon grass into my hand or something. Some kind of misshaping... Wrap the thing and it takes forever.

You know, no, fuck that. If I say yes, I want you to... Give me money. I want you to apprentice me into the diamond business. Teach me a useful skill. Teach me how to barter. Teach me how to lend money at... Get me an agent at Gersh.

What's in it for me? I mean, this might reflect, again, like, way before, you know, early in my stand-up career, this is the level of what I knew things. I had my joke with that was that they would make you shake this thing called an Etrog, the lemon, and a lulov, and you shake both these things. And I think it makes a Palestinian disappear. And that was like early, that was like, so that was, that was, that was, that was, that was, like, so that was, that was, that was my kind of, you know, light understanding of things where I knew, I knew it was, I knew it was bad. And I knew that there was like, you know, an anti-Palestinian sentiment that was shared.

But, but that was the extent. And I think when October 7th and after that, I think I did not realize how many of my friends or literally so many Jews were a Zionist in this way where you just saw my education politically came later in life and it still is happening now. But I think I've always been able to smell bullshit. And I think I learned enough from, you know, post-9-11 and the Iraq War and the ways that, you know, the lies about about the 40 babies. And then the way that, that, you know, they go, oh, it wasn't really true, but thematically it was true and spiritually it was true. but that lie props up the thing and creates this overall feeling and narrative like I just I saw it

I just saw it as I saw so many of my friends kind of automatically my friends who did the Black Lives Matter marches suddenly ignoring the and for something overseas the certainty that they possessed of yes these war these war actions are are not to be critiqued

it must occur exactly exactly as Netanyahu's saying, that's just the thing where despite my lack of an education and despite me feeling like in my mid-20s and onwards, I had to relearn things that I went, are you fucking nuts that you would so blindly believe this thing, the most moral army in the world? Anyone who can't hear that statement as a joke as a statement from any corner of the world and not go that's you can't just buy that face value yeah yeah that's hard that's that's that's where despite you know it's just infuriating it's crazy because the most moral army in the world uh stripped from the context or any programming growing up is on its face a funny joke

the idea of a moral army is hilarious that like that is but the fact it was true by it it. If it was true, you would still be describing a horrific baby-killing gang of thugs doing illegal things. The most moral army in the world, maybe that's not true. Maybe there are some armies of small nations, whatever, but an army of that, it's not even, it's not even worth debunking. But it's one of these things where the very premise itself contains the joke. And if you You can't see the joke. You're emotionally nymph. The most moral army in the world.

No guns, no wars. They just, they're kind of just guys who hang out and drink beer together. It's a paintball club. That's the most moral army in the world. It's just like one of those things when they, I remember in like middle school and they told you about oxymorons and it'd be like jumbo shrimp. I'm like, put that right there. Yes, yes, exactly.

Or military intelligence. Yes. Um, but yeah, it is, it is crazy. Yeah, I think, you know, you and I think a lot of people had the same experience of watching there. Um, they're once, uh, moral and proudly just friends like to just fall off this cliff of Zionism and blindly supporting Zionism and blindly supporting Israel, um, almost as a reaction to the idea that people would, uh, that there were people who were, uh, you know, after October 7th were, uh, were, uh, immediately like, well, Israel is bad and people are like, how can you say that after an attack such as this? And then immediately just doubling down on it and deciding that's going to be, you know, that's going to be it for them. Back in the day, you know, we didn't have so much footage of the realities. And I think, I mean, you figure the footage would do a little bit of the heavy lifting that the long PDFs explaining Israel.

and explaining Israel as an apartheid state would like just look at it yeah look I don't like to read any more than the next guy but look at the pick look at the look at the video of the soldier posted that they're telling on themselves

and it's it's strange because you see the reaction to that is so muted from those you know liberal Zionists American liberal Zionists specifically and I think you know it's they

are they so easily fall prey to the idea of like well there's a couple of bad apples and every you know and everything but on the whole you know uh they're the most moral army i actually had this through the looking glass experience you're speaking about musical theater jean marco i also went to school to learn to write musical theater i went to tish did the graduate musical theater writing program yeah right i read musical composer lyricist oh incredible yeah we got to talk shop Okay, there's one thing, tell me, but I have a musical theater thing that made me lose my fucking mind, and I want to know if you guys... So did I, and I want to, yeah, yeah, go, go, go. Okay, I'm going to sit back.

Broadway, some Broadway folks, they did, they basically, to like raise money for Israel, they did a singing of Les Miserables. Yes, bring them home. Bring them home. And it was like... I know some of the people who did that. Like, some people I consider, like, some of my favorite. colleagues. It is, it, I don't know about you, but as I got older, I think I realized, I think

I used to believe art was like inherently, like something was meaningful about art. And now I see so much art as just light propaganda or direct propaganda or just like blowing off steam. I, I, you know, Adam McKay kind of, Orwell wrote, Orwell wrote a pamphlet called all art is propaganda. I mean, and it's so easily used that way. And you look at Wicked. Adam McKay kind of, he kind of got roasted for taking Wicked, talking about Wicked

a little bit too seriously. But it's true. You watch it. And I look at Elfaba on the makeshift flying device being called a terrorist. And I'm like, that's not Israel in this story. If we're going to map anything onto this. So exactly along the lines of that. Did you happen to see the Encore's revival of,

Ragtime Oh, I didn't, but I heard a lot about it. Yeah. So I'd never seen ragtime. Lynn Arons and Stephen Flaherty, the writers were guest professors of mine at NYU. Oh, cool. You know, I respect their craft. They're solid writers.

It's a, you know, big, sweeping musical about a whole era and, you know, three different groups of people, white upper crust people, black Harlemites, and Jewish, mainly Jewish immigrants. And, you know, it's based on the Yale

doctoral novel. And I have, you know, the show works on some levels. It doesn't work in other. But it was just very, very strange because one of the characters in it, one of the main characters, Colehouse Walker, I think his name is, is this

black musician who suffers one too many horrible tragedies at the hands of racist America and kind of snaps. and he becomes a terrorist. He becomes a kind of net turn,

or at least he takes hostages. He goes to the other side, and there's a big standoff at the end climatically about what's going to happen. And it's just, and I went and saw it like the day or two after the election. So it was a big, you know, musical theater already is church for white liberals.

And I'm there at city center, and I'm in this room full of people who are processing their grief that Kamala lost to Trump. They need to get back to before, which I think is actually the name of one of the songs from the show. We will never get back to before, right?

And everyone's feeling that they need to get back to some sense of hope in America. And who's the avatar of that? Is this African-American character who's been pushed too far and who were supposed to sympathize with or whatever? and he kills some innocent white people and does some shit, you know,

and we're supposed to understand the context and all this shit. And I'm sitting there and I'm looking around me and I'm just, I'm losing my mind because musical theater is the most manipulative art form in the world, which can be a great thing if it's used intelligently and wisely. But like everyone's emotions are being stoked to the max. And I'm like, there are certain dots you will never connect, but they're sitting right in your front of your fuck. fucking face.

Yeah. You know. Yeah. And, and, and, and Emma Goldman is in the show.

And, like, it's all right there for us to, like, learn something about the world we're actually living in. And to, to,

to, to watch this show in a way that doesn't make us feel good about ourselves. Right. But musical theater always wants to make its audience,

the people sitting in those expensive seats, flatter their sensibilities and feel good about themselves. And, and that's how it just keeps being propaganda. I don't know. That was not coherent, but that was my experience. No, no, it's, it's infuriating. And I just, I just don't know. It makes me go like, well, fuck, what's, there's no point to any of this. Or do you have to add, like, do you need Colehouse Walker to come out at the end? In a cafe.

In a Palestinian play. I'd be like, there you go. And have the audience go, hey, what is this shit? I didn't sign up for this. They would immediately turn on it. I think you have to remember that, like, with most art, well, not most art, that's unfair. But with a lot of, like, popular art especially, spoon-feeding your own self-righteousness to you is the point. And if it, at any point, you are made to self-reflect, people get real mad about it. And, you know, that is, that's just how it is. Unless you do the show in Bushwick or something. Like, you can, you know, there are places where people go for self-reflection.

but it's not the big expensive houses. What's that liberal? It's some, it was a little tweet of like liberals are against, uh, every war except the one happening right now. Exactly. Exactly.

Yeah. Yeah, no, and it is true. There are certain spaces in which it's okay. I did a show, uh, in L. like a show,

50 worst jokes. It's like a play on this other show, 50 first jokes where you, you know, do it. It's 50 comedians. It's the first joke of the year. This is 50 comedians with the worst joke or the joke that bombed the most,

uh, last year. And so the audience was primed for all of my pro Hamas jokes, where I was just like, so I like open with, so I kind of get Hamas. And immediately the audience was on board. And I was like, ah, yes. This is the only place where I can do this and be assured that the majority of the audience is going to think this is funny, is at a place where you've already told them, these are jokes that didn't work. Yeah. Yeah. I had a rough one. I was trying to figure out like something about, you know, the star of David, that the problem is, you know, people just assume that means you're, you're a Zionist because it's on Israeli flag. And like, you know, how the Nazis, they took the swastika, they switched it around. I was like, there's got to be a way to switch it around so I can let people know I'm Jewish, but not a Nazi. Yeah. And it was like, it was just, it's one of those, it's a little too clunky. And the audience is going, oh, God. Yeah, yeah. What did you say? Jesus Christ. Also, the shape itself is a palindrome.

You can't. I know. And then I wanted to play on that. But then the problem was, then the conclusion of that joke is like, well, it's a Nazi no matter what way. And I was like, I was stuck. You're like, I don't like the lesson there. Oh, yeah. I always, speaking of musicals, though, what's the musical about women getting the right to vote?

What is it called? Suf's. Written by and starring Shane at Taub, who was in Ragtime, yeah. Ragtime as Emma Goldman. And helped produce. by Hillary Clinton. I thought it would have been so funny if at the end of that,

the women get the right to vote, then they project on screen how many women voted for Donald Trump to be Hillary Clinton and this one too. Jesse, it's just one of those things where I'm like, it's like people said this with Hamilton

where they critiqued it. I can appreciate good art separate from the message, but I go, why do we need to lionize this thing? And certainly lionized getting women the right to vote, but then show,

it's not just all and now we all dance and now everything's good why why do we need to do that as adults right as adults yeah you know like I never watch the Tony's because I'm in past years it was for petty reasons even when even when friends of mine are up for awards or winning

award like I just my jealousy and my envy my sense of what the fuck happened to my musical theater writing career right this year actually a good friend of mine I'm hoping we'll get nominated for something I will watch. But in this case, last year, I was like, I'm really glad I wasn't in that room. Because if I was in the room when Hillary Clinton in the middle of the genocide of Gaza

gets up and makes some kind of rousing speech about democracy, I would have shouted and cursed my way out of this industry forever. I thought you were going to say you would have Luigi Mangione. Don't Luigi. Don't Luigi. I think I can speak in this. My podcast co-host, he was the understudy for. Josh Gadden, Gutenberg, the musical.

And there was this cameo thing. There was like, at the end, like a producer came on stage and every night it was a different celebrity because that's where the musical theater, a world is at right now. And suddenly it became politicians. They got Chuck Schumer. They got Hillary Clinton. And the whole deal was, you know, you're supposed to take a picture with the producer and all these things.

And my friend Russell, you know, was very, you know, pro-Palestinian. And, you know, this was in the heart of it all. And he, you know, he had to figure out a way to, like, not be there for the Hillary Clinton thing. And, you know, he figured it out. But it was like one of those things where he's just trying to do theater. And suddenly you got fucking, you're getting politicians in the, to do a little fun guest spot. What about Supreme Court justices? And Kenji Brown Jackson was in, ugh.

And you know what people said. I blame Hamilton. Hamilton is to blame for all this shit. They said it was her dream. And I was like, I thought her dream was to become fucking Supreme Court judge. You got the dream. You got to do I get to be a Supreme Court judge for a day? Because that's my dream too.

Hamilton is the number one. When Mike Pence came and they, that is the like the pure crystallization. I actually had Josh Henry who did ragtime. time. As Cole House Walker, he did my podcast. He's brilliant. He went to the same college and I tried to bring up the Hamilton thing. You know, he's a Broadway guy. He can't speak brilliantist, but I said, what an act of impotence

to put on the show for Mike Pence. This guy who you hate him and whatever, and then at the end, try to give him a little speech as if that means fucking anything. You really want to do something? Can't the show that day. But notice who they're very happy to have loved the show. Dick Cheney loved the show.

They had no problem with that. No one made a scene about that, which was laying the groundwork for Liz Cheney to be Kamala Harris' functional running mate for this fucking election. And Democrats lapping it up. It's all such fucking horseshit. Yeah, it is kind of crazy that Dick Cheney sat and watched Hamilton.

Maybe they just wanted to see you a die. There's nothing whatsoever that's offensive to Dick Cheney's worldview. about. Dick Cheney is not one to throw away his shot. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My favorite part was the

people who died in gun battles. I've done that. Yeah. So that is musical theater. All I know, Norman Jewison died. I am not wrong with my shot. Do you guys hear Norman Jewison

died? Yet Norman Jewison, not a Jew. What? Would you believe it? well that ruins the bit forget the bit I didn't know he was not a Jew I've learned this years ago I might be wrong but I believe he was not Jewish

German Jewison that is that is insane to me that is completely insane well RIP What's the point of being named Jewish? What's the point of being named Jewson? Whole time he was not a not a Jew not a Jew

all right back he was the president of his local KKK no that that's made up uh well before we continue on with this podcast we of course do have to take a break so please everyone stick around listen to these advertisements and we will be right back and we're back this bad as bad as bar our world's most moral podcast we're here with john marco surrezi did i pronounce your last name right seresi uh yeah okay good i mean that wasn't i'm not fully convinced by the way you said yeah is it soresi it's serresi all right yeah i i basically got it

i basically got it um he is the italian stallion the half italian stallion the half jewish uh what rhymes of jewishishishish half of the hebrew hammer let's go there for sure um Gafelta fish, thank you. Half of the Gafelta, half of the sausage. Guys, I want to show you some Hesbara that I found on our subreddit, R slash bad Hasbara, still going strong. We have been...

Yeah, I get email updates for it every day. It's crazy. Like, we, that almost got banned multiple times and now it is still going. And most people using it don't know that it's even for it. podcast, right? Yeah, no, they have no idea. And when they discover that, they're like, oh, shit, and then they don't listen. But thanks to all the people out there. Shout out to all

the mods. Shout out to J.P. Ben, who is the one who helped me get it started. Good dude. All right. So here is a little bit of some. This was a Instagram video, shared multiple times. There's lots of text over it. But I want you to hear this argument that they're calling the best argument for why Israel is good or whatever. Here we go. The issue of whether or not the settlements in Judea and Samaria are somehow or another going to destroy Israel or not is not about demography and it's not about peace. It's about civil rights.

It's about Jewish civil rights. What they are saying essentially is that Jews should not be allowed to live there just because they're Jews. Now why should Jews be allowed to live in London, live in Germany, live in San Francisco, but not be allowed to live in Judea. So when they say Judea, I know our audience should know this, but I will say this.

When they're talking about Judea and Samaria, they're talking about the West Bank. Judea specifically, the West Bank. That's what they mean. And we'll keep going. Why? And in Jerusalem,

where does this come from? No, they should be allowed to live in West Jerusalem, technically, currently, under current laws. That's why they're allowed to live in London and Frankfurt because there are laws and regimes and some places even have constitutions which guarantees certain sets of rights to all people. These are the governing principles

which allow people to live places. Yeah, yeah, I love it. You know, Jews can live in London, Jews can live in the United States, Jews can live in Canada, but I can't just come into this guy's house and live there? Is that what you're fucking telling me? Whoa.

The Palestinian rights? Jews can have sex with their wives. Jews can have sex with their girlfriend, but you don't want to take me. home tonight. Come on. They want to talk so much about Palestinian rights. Let's talk about Jewish rights for a second.

Oh, just for a second. Just for a second. Let's just talk about it real quick. Let's just talk about it real quick. I feel like we've been neglecting talking about Jewish rights for a second. You so support a Palestinian state that is going to be inherently bigoted and that Jews aren't allowed to even live there, that they have to all be ethnically cleansed. No one said that.

They can live there if they want. Yeah. This has never ever been a stipulation. of any sort of peace settlement or peace agreement, the idea that like Jews specifically are not allowed they're talking about, they have

said you will get rid of the settlements, we will be kicking settlers out because they came specifically to settle. That's not the same as... It's unlikely that they can be reeducated to be non-bigoted fucking supremacists. Yeah, especially with them guns. Here we go. Even deign to accept sovereignty. What kind of state

do you want to establish? What kind of nonsense is? This is a racket. This is a racket. We know about rackets. We know for a racket. There's one thing we know. Wherever we have property rights to build just because we're Jewish and this is a moral argument. This is a reasonable argument. This is establishing what exactly? A state based upon ethnic purity. This is where we've come to. Actually, yes, it is where we've come to. Led thereby. You got you know what's crazy about that video is you literally could replace the words just switch the words Jewish Jews and Palestinians and you have a great argument you

know what I mean like you switch it and then immediately you see that this is you know that's what they do what they do is like to create their vision of the nightmare future that must be avoided at all costs they just take a photo negative version of the present reality in which their group holds all the ill-begotten power and apartheid level segregation and discrimination

and project into some imagine future that the exact opposite would obtain you say well you don't want that do you but they don't deal with what the fucking current reality is which is that well sometimes you need apartheid to avoid apartheid sometimes you need ethnic cleansing to avoid ethnic cleansing Sometimes you've got to do a genocide before a genocide happens to you. I think this is clear as day.

I think we all can agree on that. What's crazy to me is this is an argument I've seen pushed a lot, the idea of like Palestinians are not actually the victims here because look at this sign. And it will be a sign that says like no Jews beyond this point. And it'll be in English, Hebrew, and Arabic. And it's so funny to look at this as like, oh, this is this right here is apartheid against Jews because it's just like it's literally just a white person in the 60s in the South being like, oh, oh, so I can't sit at the back of the bus. I have to sit at the front of the bus.

Is that where you're saying? Oh, oh, look at this. Black people have their own fucking water fountains. Why can't we have our, like, I can drink water wherever I want. The moment the bathroom stalls are full and the white one, you're like, uh, well, we clearly need this one as well. And there's a second sign that says, yeah, it says no dues allowed. Second sign says, the road for you, which is nicely paved, is over there.

You'll be much happier over there. Yeah. And it was written the camera and you're just like, oh, that's a better rope. The back of the bus thing reminds me that at my Zionist summer camp that I went to from age eight or nine Jamarco, I wasn't some some, you know, Judah come lately to

fucking, your mom picked the bat mitzvah, you know? Yeah, yeah. My anti-designers' dad sent me there strangely enough, but we used to probably. But we were very liberal and we were very much about our own virtue.

And we used to sing songs like if you miss me at the back of the bus, you won't find me nowhere. Come on over to the front of the bus. I'll be riding right there. I'll be riding right there. Like a freedom rider is kind of like civil rights.

We would love, we loved to invite in or appropriate, whatever you like to say, you know, black freedom songs to indicate our on boardness with good virtue and values like that. But it's incredible to me. It's actually, I'd never thought of it. But we were singing that song happily and joyfully about, you know, if you miss me in the cotton fields a bunch of white Jewish kids

you know come on over to the voting booth I'll be voting right there whatever like and just not connecting the fucking obvious dots of what it was that this fucking flag that we would raise every day with the Canadian flag

the Israeli flag actually stood for which was that exactly that kind of Jim Crow or apartheid yeah it's incredible yeah it's it's now that's cognitive dissonance folks yeah that's severance that's real life severance

oh yeah you just reminded me that that show's coming back January 17th I just finished rewatching the first season oh I got to finish it still I like that you haven't finished it I'm slow I'm slow you're full and still there's a bit of a Zionist at least post October 7th but it's a damn good show

that could be that could be a good so it's a severance when he goes in the elevator he becomes a non-Zionist and then he goes back up and he's a Zionist and he's somehow he can't confront these two things yeah it is almost like a surgical procedure between your liberalism and your zionism yeah no for sure for sure yeah and and it's uh i i think that you know watching that video and just seeing people make these arguments about like you know the idea

that a palestinian state was you know is like um anathema to them because it's like before they can even deign to be sovereign they have to you know be free of jews is that what you're saying And it's like, well, there's, you know, one quick fix to that is you just turned it all into one secular state where everyone gets equal voting rights and a right to return to the property that was stolen from them. What about, well about that. What about that, Mrs. Never happened, Matt.

Never, never even, it never crossed their minds. And it's very typical of oppressor thinking that you can't conceive of the difference between free from and free of. Yeah. Yeah. You know? Yeah. To be free from means you want to.

wipe us. No, I just want to get you off my fucking neck. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, what happens? You're rejecting me. That's now you're excluding me. Yeah. Get the boot off your neck and they're like, wow, uh, rude. They're jerks, Jewish exclusionist radical Palestinians. Yeah. Could you get your neck off of my boot, please? That's not nice. Um, I also want to, uh, we got this guide, uh, that Daniel brought to my attention. This is the IDF Soldier's Guide for Traveling Abroad, Daniel? Is that, is that right?

Yes, shout out to Girlfriend of the Show Hadar for the translation and Google Translate. And shout out to Yahaav Erez, former guest and friend of the show for hipping me to this in the first place. She's so cool. She is so cool. Yeah, so this is, this appeared on Khan News, Khan, which meaning here, I think, and it's an Israeli site that's published in Wild Shia. shit. And yeah, you want to just throw those slides up there and we'll see what they're offering as a, as a hand, because you know, Joe Marco, I don't, I don't know if the, if the soldiers or former soldiers on your birthright trip talked about it, but Israelis love to travel, especially

when they have things to get out of their system, especially when they've been cooped up doing things for a couple of years to other people and people's. You know, you got to go out there and see the world and take substances that will help you forget. this is another way that severance works and this is the so there was a Instagram post leading to this article and it said this because of the anti-Israel organizations that are hunting IDF soldiers

hunting in quotation marks we present to you the traveling soldiers handbook and apparently there was something that happened I didn't I should have looked this up but I got found out about this too close to showtime there was an IDF soldier who had to flee Brazil is that right Yeah, yes. I vaguely remembered something about this, yes. An organization named after Hind Rajab, a pro-Palestan organization issued a complaint about this person after, I think, he posted some online video of himself.

So the complaints of the organization Hind Rajab that forced the IDF soldier to flee Brazil raises concerns, and pardon me for the Google Translate errors here. The org is one of many orgs that use the content. that soldiers post online has evidence, quote unquote, evidence for alleged war crimes in Gaza. Yeah, I look at, quote unquote, and you see, you see them blowing up a whole neighborhood and they've got like a fucking, you know, like Wiley Coyote, Acme, like fucking thing

that they push down and it explodes. And you're like, oh, some evidence you got there. It's like, we're doing, I just watched it. Yeah. What do you want from me? And it's not enough that they call it alleged, but they put it in quotes too. when soldiers publish an image or location

while they're traveling abroad, the organizations file a request for arrest against them. The Ministry of Defense and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs have established a team of lawyers that monitors changes in legislation and organizations against soldiers abroad, but the systemic response is still in its early stages. We're working on it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We got some air lift ideas, but until then, here's our... Therefore, we have compiled for you the things you should know. This is a handy guide of what to expect when you're... Expecting to get arrested. What to expect when you're expecting to get arrested?

First, it is important to avoid sharing sensitive information, like the fact that you're Israeli over in the army. Do not post photos in uniform and do not mention military positions or units in the profile. What are Israelis going to post about, if not this? You're taking away their entire reason to be online. I know. I have a feeling that none of these are going to be

don't commit a war crime. That's right. Don't make a TikTok dancing in the clothes of the house that you just invaded. Yeah, exactly. Don't report for duty to an army that's being currently tried for genocide. At the very least, stop filming yourself on a literal child's tricycle riding around going, I'm glad they're dead, I'm glad they're dead in multiple languages. Exactly.

Do not upload documents from operational activities to the networks like the... Wait, what? I'm sorry. Do not upload documents from operational activities to the networks. Are people doing that? All right. That's fine. That just seems like, isn't that leaking?

Who knows? Yeah, do not share the link to the Canva file where we make the Arabic Minkamp books. I'll add you as a collaborator. I want to make it look more real this time. It just doesn't look real enough. And it has to be like... I don't think I have the Arabic transliteration of the German correct. You don't have to get most of the translation.

Just make the cover. I really want you to make Hitler look sexy. I want people to think that Arabs think Hitler is sexy. But you know, yeah, in an Arab way. Is Hitler Habibi too on the nose? Discretion must be maintained when talking to strangers abroad and on networks regarding the military background. this really does read like the Lumen Handbook, you know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a severance reference for those who haven't watched it. Do not share your location in real time when traveling abroad. Post photos from trips only after returning to Israel. Yes. Only post shit from the comfort of your apartheid enclave. You know, I got to say, discretion must be maintained when talking to strangers abroad is that one does need to be put in writing

Because I don't know if you guys have met too many Israelis abroad, you know, like in your hometown and whatnot. But there does seem to be a need when you're talking to a former IDF soldier who likes the IDF for them to argue with every single person around them about why they're right and you're wrong. someone recently another comedian told me the story of he was on he was stuck on a ski lift with an IDF guy and uh jeez yeah where he just like sort of kind of like shooting the shit making conversation with just a random guy and he's like

I'm from Israel I serve in the IDF you know it's and just outpropos nothing is like it's sad what we're doing Gaza but it must be done he was just like oh okay oh man this is a really tall mountain It's just Israeli soldiers Should not go to ski hills

The only way is that Jews and moguls Should be connected Is in Hollywood Very good Very good That was tortured No it was good I got it

As soon as you said moguls I knew it was happening Yeah thank you See because moguls folks Are also the little bumps in the snow That make it really hard To ski fast Yeah

Oh we're on the next one Here we go In addition It is recommended to take the following precautions set the accounts in networks as private filter the list of followers to known people only so again it's like apartheid out your fucking follower list make sure it's only Israelis only talk to your own yeah yeah anyone else is going to have a human response to what you missed yeah exactly you notice how people just get mad at us every time we

post something horrible you want to cut that out completely as they said work on you know eliminating your accent that would be really funny yeah yeah i'm probably he knows it put on some groucho marks glasses whenever you yeah whenever you step outside what was that slide there adam say that one way instructions for high stakes game of genocide marco polo yes exactly um filter the list of followers to known people only limit the ability of accounts that do not follow you to tag you in posts oh man this is very like post heavy shit this is uh yeah this is just about you know how do uh how to not get arrested via posting, which fine, sure. Before flying abroad, contact the military prosecutor's office, which will perform a risk assessment.

It'll check out your pictures of you in Palestinian women's lingerie and see if they're, you know. I love this. There's a guy who's just like, hey, my job is that people call me and I tell them whether or not there's a high risk chance they'll get arrested. in fucking Saskatchewan. That is fucking great. And check whether the situation in the country allows the trip, i.e. there is free speech

and the population is informed. Yeah, yeah. But also, yeah. Regular soldiers must also undergo an information security briefing before the flight. Man, get your talking points. Yeah, yeah. Get ready.

And there's a bunch of shit about which countries should be avoided. As for destinations to be careful of, in fact, the matter depends on international law in each country. The countries that are signatories to the Rome Convention recognize the authority of the ICC. And that's bad, okay?

International law, and that's bad. Yeah. You know, you don't want, you don't want countries that are signatories to humanity. Yeah. Anyone that's, you know, in any way kind to the UN, don't go there, okay? It's not good, children.

And therefore, if there is an arrest warrant, they are obligated to arrest that person and even obey additional warrants as they are issued. These fucking law-abiding freaks. Yeah. Well, you know, these are all Arab compromised institutions, Daniel. You do know that.

As for countries that are not subject to the criminal court, you're not automatically off the hook there either. It depends on the law in that country. For example, countries whose law mandates the arrest of anyone suspected of committing war crimes, Jesus Christ. Even in such a case, there is a difference between different levels.

I'm sorry, but at some point, some of the soldiers have to be reading this and going, okay, well, wait, what's going on here? Are we the good guys or not? I feel like this is a lot of, you know, this is a lot of different directives on how to not get arrested for, you know, something that I thought we didn't do. This is a fucking Saul Goodman monologue. He's berating Walter White and Jesse Pinkman about how to not get caught doing what they're doing. It's so funny because you're reading about, I was reading about, you know, do you ever see the movie Invictus?

It's about this rugby match with South Africa after apartheid. It's a Clint Eastwood directed movie, not the greatest movie, but it's a really good book. And one of the stars of the team, you know, this white Afrikaner, um as a like for him he started realizing apartheid was bad because he would go to other countries and they would always you know on the road with his rugby team and they would protest all the time everywhere fervently and he was going like wait wait wait what's why are people so mad at us like it's weird everywhere we go people are yelling all these horrible things at us and and and that's when he started going like oh shit maybe Maybe I have to start looking into whether or not people actually want to live in Bantustans or not. And it's interesting, you see stuff like this. There's got to be some soldiers who are like, if this is something I need, if this is a document or like a handbook that is required reading, maybe we're the baddies. The next page is going to be like, if you are going to see a comedy show, do not crowd.

work with these comedians. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Based on their posts. Yes, exactly. Do not answer the question, so where are you from? So where are you from? So what do you do for work? What did you used to do for work?

Yeah, exactly. Oh, man, it's just crazy to me. Next page. Yeah, so even in such a case, there's a difference between different levels. Of course, just as decisions made in the district court in Israel can be overturned by the Supreme Court, such as you shot a Palestinian in the stomach. yeah you know you know yeah yeah it's like yeah you're allowed to do that if the supreme court overturns it and then there's some specific travel warnings the national security headquarters

updated about a month ago the travel warnings for armenia and the maldives well maldives maldives maldives sorry i don't know why i know that but go ahead armenia nothing ever happened there yeah uh good uh genocide wise Also, the travel warning to Brazil that was in effect has been removed, except in the border triangle between Brazil, Argentina, and Paraguay. They're very specific. The travel warning to Armenia has been escalated to level two, which means occasional threat in the shadow of numerous threats

against Israelis and Jews by terrorist elements, such as ordinary Armenians being like, we were genocided too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, we're against this. We'd like to be in the conversation, too. You can have some threat as a treat. yeah it's only level treat level has been

treat level has been escalated in addition the travel warning for the Maldives has been increased from level two to level three or level Shneem to level Shalosh which means moderate threat this is due to the presence of terrorist elements and increasing manifestations of hostilities

towards Israelis and Jews and that's the end of the they should show this when you join the IDF I think people would be like if I do this I would have never committed the war crimes in the first place my God So complicated. Exactly.

Level two, level three. The reason that so few Israelis will see this and be alarmed is that they've been being groomed since they were in diapers that the whole world hates you anyway. This is just part of being a Jew. Yes. You know, and we want you to leave your bunker sometimes, but it's going to be scary and dangerous when you leave your bunker called this country. And here is what you need to do to maintain your air of insulated superior

over the entire planet. Yeah. When they call you a supremacist. Yeah, it is, it's what makes me more pessimistic, you know, when it comes to what is going to happen with, you know, Israeli genocide, ethnic cleansing, and apartheid. I think that's why it's so, so important to call out, you know, when in America, you know, that claim of, like, being the victims of every possible thing. Because, because, you know, if you live in Israel and you grow up and you go in the IDF,

you're going to be fed this propaganda to it. But if you're in America, you have a little more breathing room and space and media to at least consume the reality of the world. And certainly, that's the one place within, you know, our realm that you can go, what are you talking about? Yeah, yeah. talking about that these colleges, you know, it's just filled with anti-Semitism as opposed to no, it's critical of this thing. That's where it's so infuriating. Because, you know, as you're

saying, when you're in the heart of the thing, you know, those folks are not going to be able to see it as clearly. Very few will. Very few will. Yeah. And, and you know, you're right. Here we have that we do have the, the oxygen and those. True. But we, but also, I mean, if there's one thing that is convinced me of the you know the downside of uh trying to reactivate people's uh jewish people's traumas in the united states and wherever jews are it's it's that october's after october 7th i feel like everyone not everyone obviously but a lot of people just immediately were just like doubled down on the idea that nope we're under attack everywhere and here's all the examples of it people in the streets marching for palestine people at college campuses you know

wanting to change the name of the Israeli kuskos to regular kuskos, you know, uh, shit, you know, shit like that where that victim narrative, uh, is being actively used against people to go against their, you know, I, I think I was, I was arguing with someone at some point where, you know, it's, it's not that they, they saw it as what, what, 1200 who died on October 7th, they saw it as 6,1,200. Like, like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, just like the continuation of like that being the now narrative was so power. It's, that is the math.

Anytime a Jew dies, you have to add 6 million to it. Yeah, yeah, that's right. Because it's always on top of that, that continuous unbroken pile of specifically Jewish, quad-Jewish suffering, and any time Jews are attacked, you're reminding us of that. Yeah. Guy Branum, who's a great

stand-up comedian, he just, he had some bit about just the number of Holocaust memorials in America versus talking about slavery, kind of honestly, in any way, shape, or form. And it just, you know, it's, I don't know, certainly I'm not here to talk,

to discredit the importance of Holocaust memorials, but it's not, of course, but you, I am. I'm sorry, I'm going to go on record. I think Holocaust education has run its course. I think we need to cancel it. Or at least put a huge moratorium. I'm serious. And I'll talk about it more.

I know we need to wrap soon. I have a lot to say about this. We got two more minutes. Here's why no more. No, but my great grandparents died in Auschwitz. And I am at and past the point. I just think the utility of it, whatever was useful about it has

of learning about it in specific as itself as this singular event the misuses of it so outstrip the actual usefulness I would say we've lost the I can't even formulate it right now in a way that would be either cogent or funny or whatever but that's where I'm at with

I don't want to hear about it anymore not because it didn't happen not because it mattered actually because it did happen and it really did matter and all we're doing at this point is just taking it in vain, bastardizing it, diluting it, and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and and.

Yeah. Yeah. And also, uh, I think that you want until the comparisons of things to the Holocaust is, uh, is considered a faux paw for everyone. Uh, then for no one.

Or for no one, you know, that's, that's, that's how I feel about it because it's like, you know, you can't make these comparisons to the Holocaust for, for anything. And then the state of Israel will be like, oh, October 7th is another Holocaust. And you're like, yeah, next to people to bring up Holocaust more, you'd be like, which one, the one of the Palestinians or. Right, exactly, which Holocaust? Yeah. Yeah, it is, it's all. It's become like Kleenex. Like, you know how Kleenex became like, the Holocaust became just. just about the subjugation of Jewish people and that's I think I think that reaction to that fuck what was the name of the movie again Zone of Interest Zone of Interest like I think it was just astounding the the quickness

with which that director expressed how Israel was committing I don't know the exact wording but genocide and the swiftness that so many Jewish people said well fuck after like just so missing

that other people could suffer the way Jews had suffered. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's hard to bear. I don't know. No, 100%. It was and, you know, it was very concerted effort, I think, to make it seem like the general thought was that Hollywood and all Jews think this is an offensive

speech. And I was heartened when I saw the amount of people who signed a letter counter to that saying, like, no, that speech was good and correct and people need to stop going after Jonathan Glazer for that. And had signatories like Tony Kushner or past bad as bar guest, Deborah Winger.

I heard. I was listening that episode. I'll tell you, this is a slight, so I had, at some point I was meeting agencies to sign with someone. And it was one of these moments where there was like it was a meeting with all they brought in everyone they brought a couple old guys who would never deal with me up there just to impress me and it was like an older guy and he came up to me and he was like so how do you even joke about the whole israel thing right now it was like one of those moments where I go because I I knew I'm going to assume

based on the agency and all these things what he meant by that yeah how do you joke about how do you even joke without criticizing Israel in any way to perform because that's the ultimately goal of what we're doing. And it was just one of those, those, just one of those moments of, it was so incredible to see Jews who have so,

get very upset of course at the implication of Jews running Hollywood or even the whiff of saying there are a lot of Jews in the arts, which you can say in a historical context and as to the why. But then in that moment that they were ready,

oh, this person expressed a pro-Palestin-view, fire them from the agency. Yeah, exactly. You fucking idiots. You fucking, you fucking hypocritical, short-sighted pieces of shit. Yeah. Yeah.

I love it. I love it. Have you seen musical theater people complaining about the lack of Jewish representation in music theater at John Marco? I have not seen it. This is a serious thing. I think they mean that there's not enough

like leading men or leading ladies. But I mean, like every fuck, like the entire, like the whole, We wrote the whole fucking canon. Yeah, yeah. Well, you say that. And yet the guy who directed this was apparently not Jewish. Exactly.

It's fucked up, you know? Yeah, it is, it is, I did see. That was quick work, Mac. Honestly, so you do a Joe Biden. Someone, someone needs to do, you do a fiddler on the roof. What's the whole thing he has to move? You do a fiddler on the roof, but you do the. retelling, they're all Palestinian, and they have to move because Israel said, actually, we're

going to bomb this area now, so you've got to move again. You know, that's something where you take the story, you take the story of people being treated, mistreated, and you actually use it to show what, how that's happening right now. Do that. And you couldn't, there'd be a fucking ride. They'd say, they'd rather have the all-female version of filler on the roof than anything that actually reflects something that. we could reflect on what we're doing now

and a part of now. Oh my God, the song Anatefka, the finale would be, you know, a little bit of this, a little bit of that. Yeah. What are they leaving behind? Their village, it would, you know, And then also, Tevia,

Tevia, you know, telling his youngest daughter who's like marrying a Jew, you know, when he's just like, on the other hand, there is no other hand. But he would, you know, It'd be a Palestinian girl marrying a Jew, and he'd be like, nah. I'd love that. I'd see that.

But, guys, that's been our podcast. John Marco, it's been so great having you here on this podcast. It's been so, so razy. It has been so razy. Where can people find your work? So I have a podcast called The Downside with Joe Marcus Sarasi. You can listen to that, watch that everywhere. Can we be invited to come on it?

Sure. I think there'll be a lot of fun. I just invited us on his podcast, man. Yeah, that was a level of shamelessness that I've encouraged you to have more of. So I appreciate that. And you got it on the record, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's great. I know, I'd love to. And I'm touring all the time. So just find me everywhere on social media at John Marco Sarasi. And, you know, if you search my name with Israel or Palestine, you can get some of the jokes

that I'm more proud of. They're all up there. They're really good. You're a great comic, and thank you so much for coming on. We'll have links to your podcast and to your stand-up in the bio on YouTube and on the podcast apps.

Check those out. Patreon.com slash bad hasbara. Please join the Patreon for all of the B'Babonish episodes and email us at Badhasbara at gmail.com. all right everyone thanks again so much for listening and until next time from the river to the sea we love us some john marco so is he yeah jumping jacks was us push-ups was us godmaga us

all karate us taking molly us michael jackson us yamaha keyboards us jarja binks on us handor was us heath ledger Joker us endless bread success Happy meals was us McDonald's was us Being happy us Bequam yoga us Eating food us Breeding air us

Drinking water us We invented all that shit Thank you.