Barbell Shrugged - 156- 5 Key Habits Christmas Abbott Wants You To Form

Episode Date: December 25, 2014

This week on Barbell Shrugged, we're going to go Sweden swimming. No, women's. Vinterbogen. Vinterbogen. Swedish farmer. This week on Barbell Shrugged, we're going to go through the five keys of success. And I don't know what you're. All right.

No, no, no. Let me do it. But just tell me. I want to hear you say it. This week on Barbell Shrugged, we're going to review. No. Review sounds stupid. I'll to hear you say it. This week on Barbell Shrugged, we're going to review. No. Review sounds stupid. See, yeah.

Pressure. I'll do it real quick. And then you can do it afterwards. Okay. Three, two, one. This week on Barbell Shrugged, we interview Christmas Abbott, and we talk about her five keys. Yeah, her five keys.

You can step in if you want. This week on Barbell Shrugged, we're going to review my top five keys to success. And my is Christmas Abbott. Boom. Hey, what's up, everybody? This is Chris. This week on Barbell Shrugged,

it's not your typical episode, baby. Get on over to barbellshrugged.com, queue up the video version, get your friends over, make some food, turn on the HDTV, and enjoy the show. Hey, this is Rich Froning. You're listening to Barbell Shrug. For the video version, go to BarbellShrug.com. Welcome to Barbell Shrug. I'm Mike Bledsoe.

I'm here with Doug Larson, Chris Moore, and Christmas Abbott. What's up? Merry Christmas. Yeah, so last year we brought Christmas Abbott on the show for Christmas, and we said we have to do this again. How long? Was that only a year ago? That was a year ago.

Not even a year ago. It was a year ago and we said we have to do it again next year but we got to take it to the next level. How are we going to do that? And we...

What is next level beyond Chris being in Christmas' bed? And Chris being under my tree. Yeah, that's right. Shirtless over there and sexy under that tree.

What episode was that? 90-something? What's a better gift? 96, I think. That's right. What's a better gift? CGP was saying... Yeah, it was 96.

96. CGP said, I can't believe I'm in Christmas' bed. I can't believe I'm shirtless in Christmas' living room. This is embarrassing. We should all go to Sweden. That's what we thought.

So we did The moment came It just made sense The moment came to you And like Is it June or July July We were in California

He's like We're out Screwing around You know what It would be great What If we got Christmas To come to Sweden with us

Or you know Something elaborate Oh man That can never happen And now look where we are It became true I don't know why He doubted that

all you gotta do is ask yeah he was like do you want to go to Sweden yes we did it together we triumphed part of the deal

was we wanted to come to Sweden to hang out with Aleko as well which we worked that one out too and that was a lot of fun so we kind of wrapped it all up into one week which was a huge blast it's been intense it's week this is a life-changing trip i'd say

christmas can you tell us about the last year what's happened in the last year because i know uh you've gone every year it's like a whirlwind uh every year gets better and better and it's it's so exciting and terrifying at the same time you don't want the next year to be not as good as this year but uh this year is definitely. That would be terrifying. You woke up and you go, what happened this year? Yeah.

We might be off the team. We don't want to slow down. Like slowing down is not what we want at this point. You got to keep the momentum going. So this year has definitely been about momentum. I think really it's been about building blocks. You know, just strengthening the foundation of the things that I'm working on.

A couple big things. One, I got engaged. Congratulations. He locked it up. Josh, you did good, man. I was wondering when that was going to happen. One day I saw it pop up on... Dude, everybody kept asking us.

I was like, get out of my face. They're like, so when are you going to engage? I'm like, not really my choice. I'm not going to ask. Yeah. Um, so that's, that's been exciting.

No, no wedding plans, no wedding date. We're just going to coast for a while and enjoy it. Uh, in case anybody started asking questions. Yeah. Yeah.

You know, we, we, we, I don't want a traditional wedding. We were going to do it. It gives me anxiety. Why don't you have a bearded maniac?

Maybe deliver the vows. Yeah. We're, we Yeah, we're discussing some options of coming back and touring Europe and having somebody. Like, wink. We're on top of a mountain in Europe, so it's gotten that far. It is. But it's like not traditional wedding. We just want to do our own thing and not worry about all that stress. Anyway, most people don't really care about that stuff. God's like, don't tell me about Christmas getting married.

Yeah, they're like, shut up. Every dude just turned their TV off. This show sucks. This is the worst show ever. It's over. Later on in the show, see Christmas in a bikini. Stay tuned. Stay tuned. um other big later on in the show see christmas in a bikini true story true story true story um big other big things uh i've been my nutrition seminar has been doing really really well which is the backbone to the nutrition book that

should come out in the spring if i deliver on time. You will. Books are a lot. You know, you take everybody's questions and you make sure. Who delivers books on time? Nobody. Nobody. You've got to get extensions on that. Yeah. But, you know, one of the big five publishing companies, HarperCollins, picked it up.

And that was a huge, huge, like, what? Yeah, congratulations. Is that like a surreal moment? I'm like, wow, because you never thought you'd be a Christmas Abbott author. No, not at all. You Yeah, it's awesome. Wow, because you never thought you'd be a Christmas Abbott author. No, not at all. It's kind of crazy because I was doing the nutrition seminars before the book came about, and that's really how the book came about.

And I put together a proposal, went to New York, had two days of meetings with publishing companies. In those two days, we had 13 meetings. That sounds legit. And four of the top five were like combating for this book. And I'm like, this is like, this just got real.

You told me about that. We were going to be in New York city at the same time. I was like, we should hook up. And you were like, well, I've got 13 meetings. And I was like,

I will see you next time. Jesus. That sounds terrible. I mean, we basically could have hung out all year long if it wasn't for you being so busy and me being so busy. We've been in the same place consistently. We've been in the same place plenty of times, but never saw each other. So that was really, really humbling and exciting to know that people were that interested in what little old me had to say about nutrition.

And I put it out there. I'm not a doctor. I'm not a nutritionist. This has been just built on my experience and trial and error and what's worked for me and what I've seen work for my athletes. And I could get into it and really start preaching, but I get really, really excited about it when I talk about it.

I think maybe Doug probably knows more about this, but you could probably call yourself a nutritionist. I don't think there's any in the United States. I don't think there's any, like... What are the rules, Doug? Like, you can't... I think... In Europe, they wouldn't allow it,

but what do we get away with in the United States? A degree is like you'd be a dietician, but pretty much if you get nutrition advice, you can call yourself a nutritionist. Is that right? I'm actually not 100% sure about calling yourself a nutritionist. Like, a clinical nutritionist, you would have to have something. I'm not sure what. Some kind of formal... You're a nutritionist. Is that right? I'm actually not 100% sure about calling yourself a nutritionist. Like a clinical nutritionist,

you would have to have something. I'm not sure what. Some kind of formal. Your nutrition advisor? But being a sports nutritionist wouldn't be a hard thing. All you got to do

is get some type of a weekend certification and then you can call yourself a sports nutritionist if I'm not totally off base there. I feel like that's how we build all of our education.

Maybe I shouldn't have brought this up. Now we're just going to get slammed by the internet. You idiots, it takes four years. Just make up your own job. I don't know. Christmas advent. Now we're just going to get slammed by the internet. You idiots. It takes four years. Just make up your own job title. Christmas advent.

I don't know. Actually, I would love for someone to tweet at us and tell us what is required to be called a nutritionist. Or you could break it all down. If someone could tell us, break it all down. Give us the guidelines. Yeah. That way we don't have to research it.

Yeah. We're curious fans. We're relying on you for our information. We're crowdsourcing. We just did our part. Now you can pick up the rest. But Chris, I would say people get confused sometimes. They figure you just born into a tattooed, shredded body and that you haven't had to work for anything.

I think you've accumulated so many lessons and you've worked really hard for what you've got. And people don't realize what it's actually taken for you to be as lean and fit and experienced in training as you are and as good at lifting as you are. It's not like you just woke up and you were given this. You had to earn this. You were, for lack of a better term, quite normal for many years, and you worked hard over the last 18 to now. Definitely not normal.

She was like, so far, there's our other side of the spectrum at one point. That would be the... You went from abnormal over here to abnormal yeah it wasn't yeah that was and i tried to play in the normal realm for about a year and i was like this is weird yeah normal is weird but thank you yeah it's it's been pretty an incredible journey my life is i look back on it quite frequently just to kind of remember where i came from and keep things in my appreciation and gratitude for life in check. And yeah, I was quote unquote normal, but really I was just a heavy smoker from early ages and drinking and

drugs. And I just really did whatever I could put my face in. That sounds like fun. Yeah, it was. I only put my face in anything I want when I'm in Vegas for the rest of the time. Keep my face pretty clean. So you try. Yeah. Yeah. And then, you know, it was a very slow process. And I've been on this journey for, I started working out and fitness really in 2004, 2005. And it's been

going on since then. So it wasn't like I woke up and decided I was going to be a fitness superstar one day. So it's taken you about 10 years of just really hitting it hard. Yeah. Which is a classic. At what point? That's a general marker. It shakes out about, you know, if you had to break it down to an average.

10,000 hours. Everybody in the crowd who wants what they want right fucking now. This is the rule. It could take a little longer. It could take a little less. But even Christmas had to put in 10 years of grinding. If you had started on that normal, that ground zero as I call it, and then started doing what I was doing,

you would have exceeded my timeline very quickly. I had to rebuild to ground zero because I had already done so much damage to my body and my psychological being before I got to ground zero where I started to be able to run a mile without stopping within 10 minutes. I want to note too, you were like a big fat chick. You were just too skinny.

I was, it was funny because people would i'd walk in i'd be wearing shorts and a tank top or something like that and you could just see what was going on in their brain and they were like that girl needs to eat like i looked like i had an eating disorder um because you could you could see every bone in my chest i just was really really almost malnutritioned um did you think that you were too skinny at the time? I knew I was. Which is funny because I was actively trying to gain weight but I didn't know how to.

Did you do that with mostly Twinkies? I think that just during that time I didn't realize that you had to stop drinking and start eating food. I've heard I've heard some ladies, and it's fun, I've heard some ladies

that will remain nameless go, why does she get to party all the time and stay so lean? I was like, well, the only calories she's consuming

is alcohol. So it's like, yeah. It's not, it's not great calories. Just alcohol and some powders here and there.

Which also are not food. No calories in that powder. Doesn't matter how much you want to eat it. I did hear that was a good fat burner, though. You wrote an article for us that we posted on barbellshrug.com. For the Barbell Daily. The Daily, about three weeks ago. No, it's been...

Four weeks ago. When was that, Christmas? It was about a month ago. About a month or so ago, yeah. But... It kind of leverages off these lessons, I think, beautifully. This is what's funny

about the Daily, actually, is probably... It's probably been two or three years since I stopped reading articles too much on the internet. It's like, man, I've just... Like, it's hard for me to find like really good content. I'm just like, okay, I've read this about this before. I've read about this before.

Not a lot of information. This isn't that interesting. Uh, and so I just kind of stopped reading a lot of stuff and I, and Chris launched the daily for us about mid October. And I was like, Oh, that's cool. That's going to be really neat. And then like a week after it posted, I find myself reading articles on our own website because we have all these guest authors, but we're inviting people that we like. I'm like, I want to hear what Christmas has to say.

And I find myself actually reading articles again on our own site, which I find really cool. But you wrote this article and broke down the five key habits. Yeah. It was cool because Chris texted me. He was like, hey, I had this idea and you guys had just launched The Daily.

And he was kind of telling me about it in very obscure but exciting ways. This is what I do. I get excited about something. Doug will say this is true. All his ideas start up in very obscure but exciting ways. This is what I do. I start, I get excited about something. Doug will say this is true. All his ideas start up. I get excited. The inner ADD kid starts ramping up and I don't make sense for a while.

I got to get some words off. I go, okay, forget that. Takes about three years. Here's what I want. Before it starts making sense. Three years sometimes. Yeah, sorry, ladies and gentlemen. Sometimes it doesn't make sense.

But this is a great example of, we recognize that Christmas has these awesome habits and we've seen it shake out in your life and that i guess the first one now i have awesome habits i didn't have awesome habits before you had to learn i mean no one's born with awesome by the way don't go drinking and doing drugs it doesn't make you awesome well this goes back to the whole 10 year thing is you didn't like you didn't wake up 10 years ago and go oh these are the five habits I need to start right now. It's like these are habits that you refined over this 10-year period. I didn't even know I was implementing these. And it's funny to look back.

Even when I started to make those major changes, I was implementing all of these. And it's cool to see that I was practicing it before I knew I was supposed to be practicing it. But I had to practice it in order to make positive changes in my life. Yeah. And it just was a natural progression and then an awareness. I think the number one thing people can, the first point is the first one to break it down. The first, uh, the first habit is set big goals, then break them down. I think that a lot of people forget that they have to have smaller goals

to get to that larger goal. They're like, oh, I just want to do 10 million things. And they don't know how to connect the dots. And if you work backwards, it helps you connect the dots a lot easier. And don't you think, let's say back 10 years ago, if you would have said, I have a dream of becoming this person who's a NASCAR, uh, pit crew, like when the first females do that, maybe the first, were you the first NASCAR? On the cup level.

On the cup level. To be on a pit team. Yeah. Uh, the competitions you've done and writing a book, if you would have laid out a big goal, like, and held yourself like, I'm going to be this person now, like forcing it, trying to make it happen. All the lessons wouldn't have fell into place. They have to come one after another in small chunks to lead you to where you need to go. The experience of the journey is what really gives you the lessons.

Shapes you. Yeah. And I think that it helps you retain integrity and gratitude for life. And it's, you know, when I say gratitude for life, I mean like being thankful right here. We are in Sweden. This is our, you know, like this is our thing now. And we have to give thanks for where we are in our life

and not take it for granted and get into that mindset of, I'm motherfucking Christmas Abbott. You can say that. You like that, Abbott. I'm motherfucking Christmas Abbott. You can say that. You like that Abbott. I'm a motherfucking Christmas Abbott. But that's appropriate

for certain times and not walking around and you know like just being one thing for all the fans. Definitely appropriate for the Christmas special. Just want to point that out.

So I think the the experience helps shape the the goals and appreciation when they happen. So you have any examples about how you've done that? Like set a big goal and then you broke it down and kind of built the whole process with the end in mind and then how you actually made it to

that goal? You know, one of the smaller goals was initially the nutrition seminar. And I get eight out of 10 emails that I get are always asking me about my my diet and my nutrition and what do i do and how do i train um but mostly instead of the performance aspect it's the nutrition aspect so i was like i'm just sitting on the couch one day um me and josh were kicking it and i was like you know gosh i'm you know no offense but i'm tired of responding to like these very detailed emails. Right. Same question over and over and over again.

And there has to be a way to convey this. Number one, if you want to ask a good question, break it up into paragraphs at least. CTE and I, we've been having this conversation. The worst email is when it's all text, very little punctuation. No breaks. It'll come through on Facebook. That's usually how it comes through. It's just

text, text, text, text, text, and it is literally very fatiguing. I feel really bad. This person's seven years old. You get like three lines and you're like, please. I feel really bad because as soon as I start reading those, I just have an internal anxiety attack and I'm like, nope, I can't read it.

If you start the email. It's not that we don't want to read them or we don't want to respond. It is literally too hard to read. It's hard. There are grammatical rules in this world for a reason. It doesn't have to be perfect. It just has to be sectioned. Let's give a pro tip to the audience.

That's a very basic level rule. If you're writing an email and the first sentence you write is, sorry if this comes off really long and rambling, but dot, dot, dot, rambling. You know that it was rambling. Cut it down 80%. We'll answer it.

We swear we'll answer it. Yeah, you got to find something in the middle. Either get long, multiple pages of text on your whole life story and there's almost no question in it and I get to the end

and I wonder what they want. Do you feel better about what you've said to me? Or the opposite. I get emails and there's not even their name included. It doesn't say, hey Doug, enjoy the show. I have all these specific questions. I would love some help which I'm happy to help people that ask me questions

like that but it'll just say what should I eat? That's it. For what? it for meat veggies some whatever i don't know like how are you how do i get strong doug question mark oh shit man lots of questions like that they're super general yeah just quick quick clarifying point uh if you want answers uh questions answered is uh quick context a little bit about your background, no more than one paragraph and that paragraph should not be more than four sentences.

This is very specific. And then your questions should be bullet points. And I like them numbered because I can go one, this is the answer to that. Two, that's the answer to that. If you do that,

10 times more likely to get your question answered. And highlighted, probably on the show. Hey, we really enjoyed this question. Most definitely. All right, so back to you. So I kept getting emails, and I'm sitting there,

and I was like, you know, I wonder if somebody would, you know, we were just talking, and it just formulated of having this seminar. And I was like, who's going to come to my fucking seminar? I keep saying the F-bomb. That's okay. Okay. It's fully expected on the barbell

anyway so it it was like that's kind of crazy it blew my mind i was like no no no and then from thinking about this is the ultimate goal um i started thinking about well in order to do that i need to know if it's one day two days I started structuring it and I started structuring it on what information do I want to give out there? Like what, what am I, what's the core concept? And then working backwards. And that's really how I already had it all in my brain. So I just started putting it on paper and then rearranging it and refining it. You broke it down.

I broke it down. And, you know, it wasn't like I decided to do this all one day. I'd go in and lock myself in a coffee shop and I'd say, okay, I'm going to give myself two hours. This is like today I'm only going to work on these categories. I'm not going to work on anything else. Focus. Yeah. Set big goals. It's awesome. Blocking. And then, and then you set smaller goals to get there and then you am wrapped your work i am wrapped my work and then within the first few um you know and it's funny because once you start working you realize what else you need and so i would just make a list of other items that i needed i wouldn't go and start working on that um so i made that's a key point if if someone was not listening just now can you say say that again? During my work, and I realized I needed something else done,

like an additional piece, I would write it down and list it versus go and start on it. Because I'll go back and forth, and then I get no work done. So I was like, no, this is my focus. My focus is this specific category. Within this category, I need a list of foods. And I would just write down list of foods and i would just write down list of foods for um maintainer category that's the number one mistake people make and it just

it was really it helped bring it all together and i literally within that seminar i actually wrote the book that i got picked up on and so it's so cool because big goal little goals that actually came to um back around to even a larger goal so you didn't even know it seminar you already had like the outline so you just had like oh this will be the chapter this book that yeah exactly that's such a great way to write a book just to get constant feedback from people in the real world from your seminar and just build it all into a book it's the questions that you're getting in your seminar that people want answered in the book anyway and it helps you make a book that people actually will read because it's actually the content that

they want because they've been asking for it during your seminars it's this nice little system that builds a book that that is easy to consume because it's very practical so how does how can you apply this to training to training oh man i love it so you you know what's your what's your big fat goal right is they're like i want to go compete love it. So what's your big fat goal, right? Is they're like, I want to go compete at regionals. Maybe that's their big fat goal. Cool. I find that people don't want to do a competition until they're ready.

There's no time you're ever going to be ready. The first time you're ready is after you, if you're ever ready, then I'm not sure what competition you're doing, especially with weightlifting as well. They say, I tell people, I'm like, whether you're ever ready, then I'm not sure what competition you're doing, especially with weightlifting as well. They say, I tell people, I'm like, whether you're ready or not, you need to go have the experience because you may have the physical ability to it, but the mental capacity is very different. And, you know, it takes a lot out of you emotionally and mentally during a competition. You don't know how your body's going to respond. It's different than training in the gym.

You grow out of that. You do. Rapidly. And it's experience. So you different than training in the gym. You grow out of that. You do. Rapidly. And it's experience. So you may not have your muscle ups. You may not have your bar muscle ups or pistols, but you need to go do a competition and stop doing scaled. I don't care if you aren't able to.

I mean, I get it. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. But always, you know, deferring to scale, be like, oh, since I can't do one thing, I'm going to do scale. I'm like, but you clean and jerk 185 pounds. You are not scale division. Should people be scared of what they look like in those situations?

Not at all. They should be scaling training, but not competition. Exactly. Just to clarify. Because they're scared that they'll try the muscle up and that they'll have that moment like in grade school, like the dream where you wake up in school and everybody's laughing at you they'll think that they'll be on the platform and everybody go look at this jerk who can't do 10 muscle ups in a row but it never happens people understand that there's there's weaknesses in fact if you struggle

and fight through it in a competition people will love you more for it and i would say 19 out of 20 people doing the competition are having some sort of frustration. They're not hiding from that one element that they're, they have frustrations and competitions. I got forced into it. I literally got forced into it. And there was things that I couldn't do. And I was certain that I would be the last to finish. And I ended up placing fifth. You don't always have that success story, but the experience of the competition builds your confidence, even if you're not able to do all of the elements, all of the movements in the competition. Somebody has to be last. Why can't it be you?

Go get them, Tiger. You're not going in it to win it. You're going in it to the experience in order to be able to at a later date, go into it and win it. I like to tell people you need to practice competing as much as practice anything else. And you have to be a good loser. Give yourself permission to suck. Don't suck at losing. I find people aren't ready to compete for their first time until they're competing for

the third time. Does that make sense? Yeah, absolutely. Until you're on your third round of something, you're not comfortable with it. You're not used to the setting. You're not used to the pressure. You're not used to people looking at you. Exactly. And then once you've done it two or three times poorly, you can be ready by the third time to do it for the first time. That kind of makes sense. And maybe then set expectations for how the meet goes, you know? Like maybe then, three or four times then

say. You have no idea how to approach anything until you've done it many times. I think it was, I started competing in weightlifting maybe 2006 and it wasn't until, I think it was 2012, where I felt like, it wasn't until 2012 that I hit like a legit PR on the platform.

Yeah, I've yet to have that. I hit a lot of PRs, you know, in training, obviously, but then it wasn't until I was on the platform, I was like oh i feel more comfortable on stage and that's i can actually use that uh to my advantage but took six years of competing yeah before that could happen so yeah i've been weightlifting for a couple years and you know you go it's different even at the smaller meets and you go up to that i remember

nationals i walked into the bar the bar, first snatch, and I looked down and my hands were shaking. I didn't even know my hands were shaking. And you've been competing for years. I love a stage. Crossfit, weightlifting, National. You'd been competing. Yeah.

And you were still nervous. I was still nervous. That's a big stage. It's a big stage. And I got done and there was so much momentum because of the the adrenaline and I was like I could have totally bailed on that you know it could have it could have crushed me and a lot of people find that they either do better in competition or they crumble in competition and just because you crumble the first time doesn't mean that you should stop competing it's just that

it means you need to build skill yeah Build the skill and competing is a skill. So if you expect to be able to get everything you want physically out of your performance and then say, now I'm going to go win the regionals or now I'm going to go win this competition, you are sadly mistaken because you have taken a skill component out. Just to give like a little bit of like, so people can kind of like understand how it might be different for me when I'm weightlifting in the gym I can remember every snatch I can remember how it felt I can like break it down you know fractional second by fractional second but to this day when I compete on a platform I don't remember anything yeah it's like everything is just gone we have to go into a flow it's like a whole nother

it's a whole nother experience and if you're not used to that, like just not being in, like just kind of going out, then that's just to give you a little bit of context of like how different it really is. It's a completely different animal. I love the fact you said how you get shaking hands up there. Now, I think people need to embrace the situations that cause them to be scared and uncomfortable. And like if you feel yourself being put in an awkward position, and you feel yourself having to rise up to uncomfortable. And like, if you feel yourself being put in an awkward position and you feel yourself having to rise up to tackle something like that, you're probably in a good space.

Push forward. Something good will come out of this. Yeah. And I mean, it's the whole, you know, fight or flight concept and fighting in this situation is just keep going forward. You have to fight to not retreat. Yeah. And you know, that's how you progress.

That's been a lot of my life. If you do that in competition, you're going to be able to do that in other aspects of your life because there's not many things scarier than competition from what I've experienced. Yeah. Because you think that everybody's looking at you

and you're messing up and, you know, it's... Nobody really is looking at you for the most part. No, that's the... And if you mess up, nobody cares either. All us primates feel the same when we get put in uncomfortable situations.

Like Christmas feels fear. She feels worried that can I really pull off the book? Are people really going to pay to hear what I have to say about nutrition? It's a common element between us, isn't it?

You just got to push through that. And I still have freak outs. I'm like, what am I getting into? Oh yeah. Can I do this? Is this fucking crazy? I don't know. know yeah i know that one we already actually went right through point number two that's right we just flowed that's

how natural it is that's how good you are writing it's like this is a natural progression of thought stream so point number two was always try new things and we just kind of rolled right into that i love it yeah so we'll skip right over to point number three was do good without expectation. Well, I want to go back to point number two just for one second. When I say try new things, I'm going, and I've said this many, many times before, the things that I have loved the most have been the things that I absolutely did not want to try. They were terrifying. I was angry, angry about having to try, you know, the pull or plunge, changing tires.

You know, I was terrified about weightlifting. I was terrified about trying crossfit, but it intrigued me enough to want to try it. One of my favorite pastimes is snowshoeing. I was curious. Yeah. I didn't know that. I'm getting a snowshoe, by the way. We need to go snowshoeing.

It's so fun. I love it. You know, go to the top, have a go it's so fun i love it you know go to the top have a little fire a little lunch check back down you've got me convinced i was i'm not i'm not convinced still doesn't sound cool it didn't sound cool but and i'm i'm like going up to the top of the mountain ain't you know just angry about it and i'm like this is gonna be the worst day of my life as soon as we, you know, like within two minutes of snowshoeing, once we got on the snow, I was like, this is amazing. And I was angry at myself for not

giving myself an opportunity to try something new and ultimately amaze myself. And now I have this favorite pastime. And so ultimately just try new things, even if you don't want to, even if he has no interest whatsoever, you'll be surprised at what you're interested in. And next week is pastime and uh so ultimately just try new things even if you don't want to even if he has no interest whatsoever you'll be surprised at what you're interested in and next week is new year's day bam what better time to say okay i'm gonna try new things polar bear plunge yes that was new i used to follow this little this little mantra of do it anyway i was at a nutrition seminar like 15 years ago like one of the first uh nutrition summers i ever ever went to and this woman was was saying that uh when she was brought

up her her father had this this little thing that he would say to her all the time no matter what it was was just do it anyway and it's as stupid as that sounds and as basic and easy as that sounds it it actually did really really well for me i was like well there's no reason to do this thing there's no reason to go snowshoeing there's no reason to try a crossfit competition or whatever but fuck it just do it anyway just try something new just to try something new with no expectation and it doesn't have to be anything huge you know it could be trying the hot yoga class versus flow or a flow and restore class it doesn't have to be anything major it can be something much much smaller but you're still expanding your toolbox so yeah do it just because you've never done it yeah that's why you should do it that's the reason

if you've never done before delivered i like that you know what that does if you start doing that shit you get a you get this sense of like there's other things I think I could do that used to seem crazy as shit. And now I think maybe I could do them. Still scary. Still overwhelmingly scary. But what if I just do that anyway? And pretty soon you're like, you just get this habit of like, what's the next thing I could do that's awesome? What about this?

And you're kind of jumping. It's like momentum. Leapfrogging up. And before you know it, you're writing a book and you're on a podcast with the most handsome man you've ever seen in your life i'd like to i'd like to point out some people are some people are more apt to try new things constantly and other people aren't and so like if you want us who are like never want to try something new recruit a buddy doing exactly pair up with someone is that what you're about to say no i wasn't gonna say that but go ahead that's how i've done a whole lot of really fun things in my life

is I pair up with a bunch of people who are super proactive and like to try new shit like Mike and Chris and Chris and they kind of just pull me along for the ride yeah he said it many times he's like hey

thanks for making me do that yeah he'll be like I don't think this is a good idea sounds dangerous to be fair nine out of ten times I go

I told you that was a bad idea we do a lot of which isn't true I'm just joking we're still alive we got all of our fingers and toes although Doug I almost did get hit by a tram

out there I almost did get hit by a tram yesterday too that's right we all did we all almost died I just wanted to make sure that people understood

I was following you yesterday and I didn't I wasn't too sure about it and then I almost got hit by a train it's a metaphor for a lot of things about it and then I was going to hit by a train. It's a metaphor for a lot of things in my life. But you didn't get hit by a train. But I didn't. That's true.

You just thought you almost did. I beam on him once too. But he still has his foot. That's true as well. Number three, do good without expectation. What does that mean? Dude, this is so cool.

My friend, Greg Lucas, the CrossFit traveler, he has these cool. My friend, Greg Lucas, the CrossFit Traveler, he has these shirts that just say, be awesome. And I was talking to him one day, and I've always been in the, I have a really life motto that it's like, don't be a D. Don't be a dick.

Hey, bro. D mean. Whatever you want it to be. You're filling a lot of words there. I like it. I like it a lot. You don't have to say D. I like to say D just because it's filling whatever blank you want. to be you're filling a lot of words there I like it I like it a lot I like to say D

just because it's filling whatever blank you want I like it and now the fans are going to write all the D words do it

perfect let's see how creative the fans can get tweet a bunch of D words at Christmas yeah send her a picture of your D

whatever your D happens to be oh god what is your D whatever your D happens to be oh god what is your D a really motivational Instagram thing we are gonna bring to the internet

show us your D she loves D pics make sure make sure to tag her fiance yeah Josh will love it everybody's like

no Josh is gonna get enraged really quick but I was sitting you know we were sitting there talking and he's just like just be good he's like Josh is going to get enraged really quick but I was sitting you know we were sitting there talking and

he's just like just be good he's like don't do good with the intention that it's going to come back to you oh yeah

that happens a lot people are like well why would I do that well people can tell right just do it right or just like

the whole concept of paying it forward he's like don't pay it forward just pay it and I was like what do you mean he's, just do good without ever thinking that life is going to give good back to you because it most likely won't. You're going to have to carve that out for yourself.

But if you are good to people without expectation, they're going to hopefully be good to other people and just creating this higher level of just being good people. I know it sounds so obscure and left field, but it's, it really is kind of cool to, to just put good out there and be like, Nope, I'm just going to let it go and let it run its course.

And it's, it's pretty cool. I say reciprocation is a very powerful. Well, I'd expect reciprocation though. Huh? I mean, things will reciprocate whether you expect it or not.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, if you put all your focus on the giving, what can you contribute? But if you don't expect it, you're never like, when is this going to come back to me?

People will ask you, Christmas, here's all the things I love and here's what I want to do and I don't know what to do. How can I move forward? Whatever the question may be, wouldn't you just start

with this by saying, what are you uniquely qualified to give? What is the thing that you could give? What about your background? What skill sets? What things are you interested in right now that could help somebody? If you just pour yourself into that, man, you'd be fucking amazed at what comes out the other end, right? I think people who love fitness, too.

They love health and fitness. They go, I want to do something in that. And they're like, but I don't know much about this, this, or this. I was like, well, are you good at web design? Are you good at like, there's like all these things. Like what do you do for work that you love doing that's not exactly health and fitness? And you could probably get involved with somebody else who does know something. Like you could probably use people on your team that would

you know having a good web designer would be fantastic right and you may already have that but like that i'm just using that as an example a lot of times people get caught up and you know they can't do exactly what they see other people doing so they're like you don't want to hit it on the nail on the head is that they don't recognize their own strengths because they don't they don't look and reflect upon what they are good at and what they you know what you love may not be what you're good at but you're gonna eventually be good at it if you keep at it um but i i think that it's people don't reflect on their strengths versus their weaknesses with that is exceptional to them right and that usually is the gift that they can give other people.

Well, there's a lot of time. So go ahead, man. I think a lot of time with respect to what you were just saying, people ask the wrong question. If someone wants to come into the fitness industry and be a coach, for example,

they might ask, am I an expert? Am I the best? Right. You know, it's kind of like the competition thing. Am I, am I already the best?

And if I'm not already the best and I don't want to compete, it's the same thing with becoming a coach. A of people think well i don't i couldn't be a coach because i'm not the best already as if anyone that started coaching was the best when they started i was terrible in the beginning we all were so what people should be asking man we all people should be asking instead isn't am i the best am i am i the best nutritionist my best coach my best weightlifting or weightlifter? That's not what they should ask. If they want to become a coach,

they should ask, do I have the ability to help people who are a level below me? That's what they should be asking. If you have the ability to help somebody, then you should be a coach and you'll get better over time. Even then, how do I get that ability?

Because ultimately, right now, we're talking about that higher goal and then working backwards, right? They want to be a coach, but now they're just an athlete that maybe isn't a very good athlete, right? You don't have to be a really good athlete to be a good coach. By the way, high-level athletes a lot of times don't make the best of you. No, they're like, just do it, overhead squad pistol.

Just do it. Why can't you just quit? Just do it. I can't tell you how many times I've heard it. I'm like, what do you mean just do it overhead squad pistol just do it why can't you just quit just do it i can't tell you how many times i've heard i'm like what do you mean just do it um usually awkward movers are better coaches because they have to break it down they had to break it they had to learn how to do it at some point right and very practical application but ultimately you want to be a coach well what do you do you you try and teach a class and you realize, oh gosh, this is difficult. How do I start developing this skill?

Going to weekend seminars or online education. Those things will help develop those skills. And like what you said, then you start teaching somebody that's below you or less experienced or even better experienced and get feedback. Shadowing other coaches and getting their feedback when they, when they watch you coach their class, but they're there as a mentor is one of the best ways to get good very quickly. That's another thing that's shocking to me is people go, they're like,

how do I get started? You know? And they just want to like start their own thing and start coaching. I'm like, well, when I started with CrossFit, like there were no other CrossFitters in town. And that's why we opened up

a box and we kind of had to like fumble through everything. But, uh, that's usually not the case now. There's like 10 boxes and like, I don't like those guys or something like that. It's like, go intern for those guys. You'll probably end up like that. Yeah. If you want to do it, you'll find a way to be able to just insert yourself into the community at some capacity um my friend Megan she she had no coaching experience she was not a good athlete and she was like I just I don't know what I want to do I just want to learn and take in some information and from there she started developing her skill and she actually um she works for HQ now she worked it she was working for reebok and

that was within two years of um coming to me and just being like i don't know what what do i do i'm like the first thing you do is you just come and tag along with boot camp and um you know she just drank the water and she was very self-initiative to to learn that and she what did you put in the water anything fun here just literally just drink this water the most important thing you do is just start it doesn't matter how small it is it doesn't matter this is not going to be your destiny forever you won't always be this little small thing just start and see what happens all right let's move on to point number four actually the last two are my favorites

yeah number four is learn to put yourself first sometimes you put sometimes but I know

you gotta put yourself most times I was like man somebody's gonna take that really literally and just be like everybody they're gonna be like

I'm always first screw everybody screw you screw you screw you I'm you I'm, I'm always first. Screw everybody. Screw you. Screw you. Screw you. F you. I'm first. I'm out.

Christmas did. Sometimes. Yeah. I love this because, and it's funny, we were talking about this earlier and you were like, especially women, especially women need to say, hey, this is my time. This is the biggest complaint. Guys tend to have a really easy time putting themselves first. Yeah.

I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding. And honestly, I think- Guys are much more individual focused. Girls are much more community focused, usually. Yeah, they, you know, and I'm probably going to get some backlash, but I think naturally we just want to take care of or please. And you guys are like, please me, take care of me.

I like it. I like when women please me. Yeah, butoug is right like guys tend to be you know somebody with a masculine nature tend to be more individualized and people with and this isn't gender specific but most of the time it is so i want to kind of put that out there too so that we don't get right i can only hear the typing now. I'd say there's about 10%. 10% of women are a little more masculine and 10% of men are a little more feminine.

I identify much more with the masculine. I would say you're a little more masculine. And Chris here, people don't know this, but he's a little more feminine. You know what? I, and I will not

for one second be embarrassed by that. I am proud of the fact that I have a lot of female tendencies in terms of like wanting. Feminine tendencies, that's right.

Yeah, feminine. Female too. People are like, what in the shit is Chris talking about? What I'm saying is I am personally fueled by that engagement and community and the sense that I want to do this because I want people to see what we're doing and enjoy it and join us for the ride. I don't really have, maybe sometimes it would be fun to have more of the individual ego, but I love the fact that that's my perspective. I'm okay with that, you know.

You have more of a we collective mentality than someone who's very individual, agentic focus where it's all about ego and me and what do I get out of this. Yeah, absolutely. So that's a good thing. Yeah, and I think- It tends to be a feminine quality,

but it doesn't mean it's necessarily a good thing or a bad thing. It's just a thing and that for you your style, and it works very well. Yeah, I'd say the key thing is I've had to learn that whatever you are, that whatever your natural tendency is, you have to just embrace that. If it's feminine, own it and use it to do good. And it doesn't matter really what you are, but the key thing, I think, is when you find somebody who is counter and complimentary to you, do more with them, too.

So that first action is so important. And then find somebody who can take that action with you counter and complimentary to you, do more with them too. So that first action is so important. And then find somebody who can take that action with you who's complimentary to you. And now you can start seeing how you can start sort of raising exponentially the power you can have and the good you can do. That's what we've got here. We're all different personalities. We come together to do some awesome shit, right?

And we're watching the sunrise over Sweden. Over Gutenberg. So how do you put yourself first sometimes? You know, you have to. To the point. Seriously, you really have to carve the time out. Or, you know, a lot of the times, and this is just kind of a general statement, but like in my nutrition seminars, women are like, well, I have to cook a dinner for my husband

and I have to cook a separate meal for all three of my kids. And I'm like, well, I have to cook a dinner for my husband and I have to cook a separate meal for all three of my kids. And I'm like, why? She's like, well, they don't eat the same things. And then they're there because they want to better themselves. They want to find a way to eat for their life. And I'm like,

first you have to have your community on board. You have to talk to your family and have them support you in this endeavor. So you're bringing them together. And that even is selfish. Saying, hey, look, I'm going to do this for me, and I need you guys to support me, and that may mean that you guys eat some meals that you don't want to. And then I kind of play along like, look, if you are cooking the meals,

they're going to eat what you cook. So be selfish. Like, this is my food you can eat it either eat it with me or you can cook your own thing this is this is leadership this is leading your family your kids shouldn't lead the family when it comes to something as important as fucking nutrition and i tell them i'm like look i don't have kids but i've seen you know a lot of my friends a lot of my family and i've seen them work this aspect um don't bring it in the house if you don't want to eat it.

But, you know, otherwise it's you being selfish for something that you need in your life or changes. It's usually better for everybody else. Yeah. This is something I've noticed is anytime my wife is trying to get lean, guess who also gets lean? This guy. I'm not going to go, first off, I'm not going to tell her not to get lean. And then second off, when it starts happening, I'm like, I'm just gonna go first off I'm not gonna tell her not to get lean

and then second off when it starts happening I'm like I'm just gonna eat whatever's around I might get a little hungry here and there but I get like

extra snacks or something and then if she's eating for performance I usually put on weight even beyond food and so like that's I'm letting her have that

but that's cause we have that communication the communication is very important I think a great example is like mothers who are in Cross have that. But that's because we have that communication. The communication is very important. I think a great example is, like, mothers who are in CrossFit. One of the big struggles is you have, let's say you get it going, you get in shape, and you have a family start. Like, I think the first thing you will struggle with is, like, feeling like it's not right for you to take time for yourself to get back in shape or to go to the gym before you come home to the kids. People will give themselves too much to their kids.

That's what you should do, right? Question mark. But then you realize that you can't be an optimized ass-kicking mother if you don't do the things you need to do for yourself first so you can give more to your kids. And you're setting a better example for your children. And this even transitions into relationships.

You know, Josh and I are very good at like, hey, you go off with the boys and hang out because I'm going to go off with the girls and hang out. And if you get pouty about it, then you have to deal because I need my time. And we're very big on making sure that we have our own time to when we do come back to the relationship,

we have more to contribute to it. And it's important because, you know, I'm very independent independent i'm very driven and no he is too i wouldn't guess um but if i went into like this very codependent relationship and i wasn't selfish with my time then i would be i would be making like hurting the relationship and the overall being for for what we're striving to do so we are very big on like having our own time you know we come back together and have a good time but if i'm like feeling a little bit grumpy or whatever i'm like you can go over there i'm gonna like have my

corner i need to work i want to have me time or i'm gonna go off and shop and spend my money and it's okay because ultimately it's it's making me feel better and he's to go off and shop and spend my money. And it's okay because ultimately it's making me feel better. And he's going to go off and do something that makes him feel better. And then we're going to come back and be able to be excited about seeing each other again. You can share what you've been doing. You guys can talk about it. You'll bring something back that you'll both enjoy. All right, point number five.

My favorite. Purge the negativity from your life. Purge the negativity from your life. Ige the naked titty from your life. I was like, this is going to go. I'm going to a fitness festival. T and A everywhere. What's in the coffee? Freud.

Freud was right. Purge the negativity from your life. Oh, my gosh. Just stop saying I can't. Yes, you can. Maybe not today, but eventually. They're like, I can't do that. Well, of course you can't do that because you believe that you can't. Just say I'm working on it. It's I'm a work in progress. You have to put it into a context that you are in the process of and that you will eventually.

And stop taking that no, I mean, stop putting that no or that not into it and that always, like, you always, like, undercut yourself. You know, I hear this all the time, especially with people in the gym or with nutrition or just in life. They're like, oh, I can't do that. I'm like, look, if I was able to pull myself out of a ditch and get myself to ground zero and then build from there and be able to be where I am today, everybody can do something that is good for themselves. And it's just so frustrating to hear such a blanket of negativity around people that they just don't even know it's there. And they're just

restricting themselves all the time in every single part of their life. I get mad about it. I know some high performance communities, say like a group of like Navy SEALs or something like that. And I'm not sure if they actually do this in Navy SEALs or not, but like high performance groups like that in some settings, they won't tell you that instead of saying, I can't, you have to say, I can, because that in some sense they they won't tell you that instead of saying i can't you have to say i can because that in some sense that that is unrealistic because not everything is is possible today even if you can get to it eventually so instead you'll you'll be corrected and it's and it's almost against the rules to say i can't you'll be corrected to say i won't instead of i can't right because you can do it you're just choosing not to. So you have to say I won't. That way it really sinks in that you are making a choice right now to not do something.

Not because it's not possible, but because you are actively choosing not to. And that's your own psychology. That's your own decision internally that you're not going to do something. And it's not because the world's holding you back. It's because you are holding you back. You've got to be careful what you say and what you pretend to be and how you and the friends you surround yourself with because these are the conditions that make you exactly what you are like whatever you pretend to be is what you are that mindset will limit you or

allow you to push forward that's the truth man yeah i like what doug was saying too i as a coach i like to say people go oh I can't do that I go oh you're right and then they go what you're supposed to like say no come on get together of what the coach is supposed to say I go you're right and they're like and then they're like almost like why I was like well the fact that you believe that you can't means you can't yeah and they go so story's over and it turns into this conversation and then they hate me but uh actually this I I rolled out i don't do this well i roll out of bed and 10 minutes later i check out my instagram every morning and then

my friend uh so wrong fitness you should follow him on instagram by the way because he posts some funny stuff he posted a quote by henry ford this morning uh how fitting it says whether you think you can or you think you can't you're're right. Yeah. And so that's perfect. I thought Stewie Griffin came up with that. I tell people a lot of my athletes, you know, they come in and they're like, well, I don't know, I don't know, or I can't, or whatever. And I'm like, why can't you? Like, just give yourself the opportunity to amaze yourself. Because a lot of times you'll be surprised.

You're so much more capable of doing things that you didn't know you were doing if you just give yourself a chance. Try it. Try new things. Give yourself a chance. But I always say, give yourself an opportunity to amaze yourself. And most of the time it happens. It comes back to as well, like talking about having a big goal and then breaking it down. In an instance like that, as a coach, they say, I can't do that.

And you go, okay, well, maybe you can't do that, but what piece of that can you do? And how many pieces of that can you do? And you might find it's only like this little piece that's scaring them. That's providing some amount of fear. That's making them say that I can't do it, but really they can do like 80% of what you're talking about. They might say, I can't, I can't do a snatch correctly. And you go, okay, well, can you do any part of it well? And they say, well, I can do this part, this part, and this part, but I can't seem to have it hit my hips correctly or hit pockets or whatever. And you go, okay, well, let's work on that little piece.

And it's usually like the teeniest piece. Now you have a solution. Now you break the fear, right? The fear loop is broken. Now you can get past it. Last thing, negative people too. Get those people out of your life, I think. That's the hardest thing to do.

Funny story, and I tell this in my nutrition seminar about having scheduled cheat days and making sure that you do it guilt-free. You know, if you do well and somebody was like, don't reward yourself with food, you're not a dog. Get out of my face. You don't know what the fuck you're talking about. I don't reward my dog with food. You're not a dog. Get out of my face. Okay? You don't know what the fuck you're talking about. I don't reward my dog with food. I don't either.

I don't either. They might not be right, but that's funny. Shit, where was I? What was I saying? I don't know. Negative people. Oh, yeah. Cheat day.

Negative people. Look, if you're going to go have a cheat meal or a cheat i say cheat item and you're hanging out with friends and they're like so i have my cupcake you have your cupcake and the girl beside me or the guy beside me is like i really shouldn't have this oh my god this is gonna make me fat oh my gosh oh i shouldn't eat this i feel so guilty shut your face get out of my zone because i'm gonna enjoy my meal and you being a negative Nelly over here is really pissing me off because I've worked hard for this

and I'm going to enjoy it so you need to pack your little cupcake up and go home. Pack your little cupcake up and fuck off. Pack your cupcake. Yeah, like, just don't do it.

If you don't want it or shouldn't have it, then don't put it in your mouth. Like, just don't do it. I get mad about it. shouldn't have it then don't put it in your mouth like just don't do it i get mad about it don't ruin my cheat i don't ruin it what tips would you have for people who the person who is holding them back like in training and stuff is one of the closest people to them though that also happens right you you can have a you know hey look if we're gonna hang out during this time it's my time be selfish and I need you not to be negative.

And it's just having a conversation and making people, one, aware that they're negative. A lot of people don't. And you don't have to be like, hey, man, you're a real dick. You don't have to do that unless you have that reputation. There's nothing wrong with being honest. Say, hey, look, I feel that it would be helpful if you would get over these things.

You can communicate openly and honestly. They don't have to get over it. Say, hey, look, I feel that it would be helpful if you would get over these things. You can communicate openly and honestly. They don't have to get over it. It's not your job to make them get over it. It's your job to make them aware that they are affecting you. And then how they want

to deal with that is their responsibility. Yeah, I like it. But hey, look, when we're in our time, from this time to this time, we're having coffee or we're having our cake,

I need you to hang up the negative words. And then maybe they might be like, well, really am negative you know it's it's just an awareness issue most of the time and if they don't you tell them i'll i'm sorry i'll step away and right we don't get to spend much time together all right i want to say thanks he's like shut up i want to say thanks to heaven 23 restaurant here at Gothia Towers in Gothenburg. Gothenburg.

Gothenburg. Gothenburg, Sweden. And yeah, we're here and they let us set up a shop and drink all their coffee. Christmas has to go to a workshop, a nutrition workshop at the Swedish Fitness Festival. No, actually I'm throwing some barbells around.

Oh. Boom. We're doing barbells. You got nutrition today too, right? Mm-mm. I'm soaking shoes. Just weightlifting. She's going to kick ass.

Just weightlifting. You can't use this. All right, we're going to go lift some weights. Slam some bars. All right. Later. Cheers. This is Andrea Ager, and you're listening to Barbell Shrug.

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