Barbell Shrugged - Feed Me Fuel Me  — Whatever I Want w/ Beau Ash  — 97

Episode Date: July 26, 2018

It has been said, "the journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step." Our guest this week, Beau Ash, has taken many first steps as his life has unfolded into the chapters of his story. Beau went through a journey of acceptance and self-love. One of the hardest concepts to grasp as we move through life, is the idea that with loss, comes growth. For a great deal of Beau's life, so many of the negative interactions he has experienced were the result of the projections he was putting out into the universe. However, in the wake of loss, he would discover that he indeed stood to grow the most. Beau took a 4,100 mile road trip that manifested in deep reflection. He has gone to work on himself, answered a lot of hard questions, and faced a lot of conflicting truths. Once Beau began his deep dive into self, he discovered that his capacity to serve the world was extremely limited, and the self-work is never-ending. However, Beau has come to a place where he values his time alone. He understands that in order to protect his energy, he must be in tune with who he spends time with, and what activities he spends that energy on. Beau has become a practitioner of his word. In this episode, we discover all the elements that lead Beau from a polarizing rebel of authority, to a CrossFit athlete, to Yogi, to a man without any of those labels, walking a path of strength and peace. The freedom of thought achieved through years of introspection and reflection is apparent as he sets out to debut his podcast, "Whatever I Want", and a support group that redefines masculinity for men that are high performers, or want to be, but are inhibited because they stand in their own way.   Enjoy! - Jeff and Mycal ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Show notes: http://www.shruggedcollective.com/fmfm_ash ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ► Subscribe to Shrugged Collective's Channel Here http://bit.ly/BarbellShruggedSubscribe 📲 🎧 Listen to the audio version on the Apple Podcast App or Stitcher for Android Here- http://bit.ly/BarbellShruggedApple http://bit.ly/BarbellShruggedStitcher Shrugged Collective is a network of fitness, health and performance shows that help people achieve their physical and mental health goals.  Usually in the gym, but outside as well. In 2012 they posted their first Barbell Shrugged podcast and have been putting out weekly free videos and podcasts ever since. Along the way we've created successful online coaching programs including The Shrugged Strength Challenge, The Muscle Gain Challenge, FLIGHT, Barbell Shredded, and Barbell Bikini. We're also dedicated to helping affiliate gym owners grow their businesses and better serve their members by providing owners tools and resources like the Barbell Business Podcast. Find Shrugged Collective and their flagship show Barbell Shrugged here: SUBSCRIBE ON ITUNES ► http://bit.ly/ShruggedCollectiveiTunes WEBSITE ► https://www.ShruggedCollective.com INSTAGRAM ► https://instagram.com/shruggedcollective FACEBOOK ► https://facebook.com/barbellshruggedpodcast TWITTER ► http://twitter.com/barbellshrugged

This is episode number 97 of the Feed Me, Fuel Me podcast with our special guest, the yogi hybrid, Bo Ash. Welcome to the Feed Me, Fuel Me podcast. My name is Jeff Thornton, alongside my co-host, Michael Anders. Each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message related to our three pillars of success, manifestation, business, fitness, and nutrition. Our intent is to enrich, educate, and empower our audience to take action, control, and accountability for their decisions. Thank you for allowing us to join you on your journey. Now let's get started. Hey, what's good, fam?

Welcome to another episode of the Feed Me, Fuel Me podcast. There's Jeff coming to you live with the Yogi Hybrid, Bo Ash. What's up, guys? Thanks for having me. Yeah, thanks for being here, boss. Excited to have you, man. Sure. It's our path to this point, seated on this couch, has been extremely interesting.

And I've been really waiting to have you on the show, mainly because I think you have a really awesome story to tell. But having been with you in your life for as long as I have, I think going on six or seven years now, watching your, your evolution as a man and a human being, I think now, uh, you know, that we're, we're, we're, we've come full circle with this experience. Uh, you're in a place where you're, you're comfortable telling your story, you're, and you have, message that you're now presenting to the universe based on the

evolution that you've had. But for everybody who doesn't know, we'll dive into all that, but for everybody who doesn't know who you are and what you're doing, what you're up to, kind of give us the cliff notes of your journey. Yeah, my name is Beau. Just a journey, a small background I grew up in North Dakota on a farm there and um I joined the Air Force right out of high school about three weeks after I graduated I was in the Air Force for 10 years and um I was a bomb loader on fighter

jets um which turned into just being a teacher on it um And then got out, moved to Scottsdale to go to school, pursue at the time what I thought would be competing in CrossFit, and then became from there just got hooked to CrossFit, started coaching. Of course, we'll get into more like my journey into coaching, and then I found yoga through CrossFit. And in that transition, I went through a pretty heavy transition in life in my own relationship and who I was with at the time and that kind of broke me down to just make me realize my own bad habits and what they've created and it really woke me up and

I started kind of self-developing from there. And then eventually came to the point where I was comfortable with who I was becoming enough to be confident in sharing my experiences in life to hopefully help other people share theirs. And, yeah, that's where we're at right now. What year did you move down here to get in CrossFit and then get into yoga? So I moved down here to get in crossfit and then get into yoga um so i moved down here in 2012 so i walked in a crossfit gym in august of 2012 and i didn't find yoga until 2013 13 at phx okay yeah that's why you know was ginger yeah okay yeah yeah yeah so real Yeah. Okay. Yeah, Ginger. Yeah. Yeah. So a real interesting experience happened.

Bo was one of the first coaches at PHX, helped me get the place open. And I'll never forget the day you asked me to come coach at PHX because we didn't even have a building yet. And we were doing a competition uh and between events you just came up to me and we're like hey man rumor has it that you're open in a gym i don't you know can i can i move over there and coach with you i was like yeah sure man you know uh i know you have experience as a teacher but we're going to go through this process together and make sure that, you know, you're coaching, A, the way I need you to coach, and B, the way, you know, in a manner that people will respond to, you know, which is something that I'm very in tune with as I've

cultivated this apprenticeship process at PHX. And along with that that the vertical integration of PHX we brought Ginger in who'd been doing yoga with me we taught spin together at the village between the Marine Corps and opening PHX and I'll never forget we she was teaching a class at phx on a thursday night and uh we get into the practice the flow the zen all that stuff and mo just gets up and walks out no way yeah yeah and i was like dude what the fuck happened he's like dude yoga's for the birds. Like, I'm not, I can't do it anymore. Yeah, it was crazy. Man, the first yoga class there, and I tell that, this to a lot of my yoga students too, I got up and left, and after class,

because I used to coach the hour after yoga, right? So we'd have yoga, and then I'd end up coaching. And that first class was, like, this huge, like, hip opener class, like, because it was for for athletes and I just wasn't having it like I got up and left and after class I was kind of just sitting on a chair there and I had to coach and um the girl I was dating at the time who helped me like a lot on this transformation like her and her whole family was just very just like eccentric and spiritual and really um i would say just kind of developed in that area and i was sitting on a chair and my girlfriend at the time was like you know you know

you know what's wrong she's like what happened i was like i don't know like my mind felt super happy like i'm a happy guy i deal with stress easy but i had this like like this funk like i like i literally was on the border of crying and for no reason like i was happy and it's like this it lasted for like two or three days and that's kind of when i was like that's when i stayed away from yoga so for a couple weeks after that i was in school at the time so they do yoga and i'd like i'd say you know i had homework to do and stuff like that but it kind of just scared me because at that time you know I grew up on a farm you know just grew up like a normal dude working and I was in the military in a very like masculine job so like all that energy and yoga and all that stuff just like kind of was bs to me so I didn't really

like believe in it so I just kind of stayed away and then i'm just kind of a learner with anything that like triggers that in my mind so i eventually was like okay like i need to figure this out like why how could something that i'm not thinking about in my mind cause like an emotional reaction to my body like those things just like don't line up like tangibly right like there's no science to it so that's what originally got me like really sparked into yoga and then i ended up leaving phx and kind of on my own little journey and i backed away from yoga for a while and then um me and my girlfriend at the time we decided to move to canada and start a big happy life and open a crossfit gym and all that cool stuff and um things didn't go quite as planned and um we ended up

breaking up in canada and the breakup was really bad like we were just a very codependent like you know we thought we were soulmates like around each other 24 7 just super intense right like stomachache intense all the time like if i wasn't with her i want to be with her when i was with her i couldn't get close enough and um things just my own issues um of insecurities and jealousy ended up just creating this whole mess between us. And she just couldn't have it anymore, which was, at the time, devastating. But now it's definitely a blessing of how strong she was. And we ended up breaking up in Canada. And we left each other.

I'll never forget the day, of course. And we were yelling at each other. We were crying. And, you know, we don't want to, but we know we need to. And I left the house. And I drove her truck back from Canada all the way to here. Right? So as soon as I left the house, we, like, broke up.

We're yelling. I get in the truck. I'm, like, freaking out. She, like, blocks my phone number, and she blocks me on social media. Like, just cuts me off. So here I am. I have 4,100 miles to drive by myself after I just lost what I thought was going to be my entire life. Right. And I'm, so I'm driving for six days straight, 12 hours a day with just myself,

like nobody to talk to. She wouldn't answer the phone. I was like having panic attacks on the side of the road. And man, if you've, if you never spent one day with yourself, like totally with yourself, when you're going through that, like six days is crushing. So I got back here. And when I got back here, I had no car because, you know, we moved to Canada. So I sold my car. No house. No money. No relationship.

And no job. And I just got here. And I was at her house because i drove her truck back and i was sitting on her couch and i was like man like you know i thought i've hit rock bottom a few times in my life like going through you know divorce and all that but like this was like rock bottom and um i ended up getting a call from a really um good friend of mine david freeman to work at Alpha. He offered me a full-time coaching job, which was such a blessing in disguise.

But the day I got there, I noticed it was a yoga studio, to bring this background to yoga. And I met this guy. I was working out. And this guy comes up, and tattooed guy. He's a yoga teacher. And he introduced himself and ended up becoming one of my good friends. And I ended up,

that's how I got back into yoga. And then I was taking yoga four or five days a week. And of course it was at the perfect time of my life to kind of work through all that stuff. And, um, you know, once me and my teacher became such good friends, he's like, Hey,

you need to take teacher training. Like you have just stuff to offer like you just have this story and this energy so at the time like i said i was just broke and i was like okay cool like how much is teacher training it was uh you know it's usually on like you know just like three thousand dollars and i was like i was like three thousand dollars i was like i don't have three hundred dollars and um so i was kind of like i was pretty upset about it and just randomly um i the company i work for a lifetime they do this like um like a once a year scholarship right so people put you in for it and they give out like one free teacher training scholarship a year like

nationwide and um i didn't know this but they had put me in for it and um i was sitting at whole foods and i was reading and doing my thing and I get a phone call from the front desk and like hey just so you know like I you know you got the scholarship for your yoga teacher training that's awesome oh and I like I like I like start crying right like I'm just like man like so then through teacher training maybe it's because I got the scholarship or i was like i need to i need to teach i need to give back because a lot of people who take yoga teacher training don't necessarily end up teaching like they just do it for their own knowledge and to deepen their

practice but i was like no like i need to share and then as soon as i got a teacher training um just how it's always worked for me i I just have, like, fortunately been a decent enough human for people to believe in me and, you know, give me chances. And I ended up, you know, getting to work with Lululemon right away and a couple of good experiences that kind of just launched, you know, yoga for me. And I wouldn't say, like, CrossFit and coaching took a back seat, but it kind of, they kind of met in the middle. And now, you know, every, both of them are just as important to me, right?

Like, people always ask now that they more see me as a yoga type of person. They always ask me about that, like, coaching CrossFit and training and stuff. And I can't have one without the other, right? Like, they're both equally as important to me. I want to backtrack to the 4100 miles like in that six days what was like the what was ultimately the the discovery you had about yourself like what what came calling to you as you know while you're on that journey back to Arizona? I think the biggest thing, and I think I still use it today,

and I think is a big driver for people, or should be, is just reflection of your past, right? And so for me, I had, most people do or don't know, I guess, but I had been married twice before this. And so by that time, that was my fourth serious relationship. And just looking back at things. So you get to the certain point where there's always a common denominator. And for much of my life, because of my ego and how people let me be and just the environments I was in, I was never the denominator.

It was always everybody else, right? I could always deflect and blame and stuff like that. And I was just sitting there and I was just looking back at everything. So I just looked back at myself. I was like every relationship I've been in, the person's been completely different, right? The upbringing, you know, their personality, their drive. But at the end of the day day they all ended up the same you know like they all ended up the same and i was like why does it keep ending up this way so then i finally had to decide you know am i going to

keep living in a way where to be stubborn enough to think I know everything and that I have to find somebody to work around that or am I really going to sit back and take the chance and um maybe ask a question like maybe I'm wrong like maybe maybe the way I live and the way I think is wrong and as soon as as soon as you're open enough to ask that question to yourself once like that's the moment where I think was like the big bang theory like once i literally asked myself like maybe it's me i think that was the determining factor of just like open like breaking me open right they say on a path of enlightenment or whatever you're on of self-development you know you're either innately born with that intention that it's gonna become a part of you

or two you have to be you have to be shattered you have to be shattered, right? You have to be broken. And I think that's what happened with me there. That's crazy. And when you have that epiphany, like on that journey at that moment, what type of resources did you use to continue to sort of uncover those layers in you? Oh man, it was crazy. So the crazy part is, is, and I think people do this all the time, is we learn knowledge before we learn how to use it, right? So I see people all the time read books or do all this stuff, but there's a difference between learning and using, right? Like knowledge, right? Education and knowledge. And fortunately with my ex's family, they had seen a part of me that they thought needed to be changed. So they really, they'd give me some books and I'll never forget one of the first books I read was The Key to the Superior Man.

And her grandma gave me this book. And I read it and I remember reading it and be like, like I, I read it and I already thought that was me. Like that's how like that's how that's how big my ego was at the time right it was like this book about like what a man is how he works with you know the feminine energy like what being a true masculine and as i read this i was like i already do this right like i really thought that and um so i already had some of this knowledge that i read i just didn't i wasn't in a space to use it yet. And so on this, I think that's one of the things that helped me is I already was, I

want to say so arrogant that I was reading these things, but I already thought I was them. And another one of the biggest things was on this drive. Um, I had a friend from back home who I was, um, I guess you would say I was life coaching, right? Which is crazy because here I am going through this huge shift in life. You know, like my whole life just got shattered. And he didn't really know that much about it. But on the trip back, he was really going through some hard stuff just with his whole life too, right?

Just being unhappy and how unhealthy he was. So by helping him, and he was the person I was talking to, and as I was writing to him, I was pretty much writing to myself. Oh, that makes sense, yeah. So every text, he'd say something, and every text I would send, I would read again, and I'd realize I'm helping myself by helping him and um and i think that's when i when you say when you finally find your your passion or mission i think that's my biggest thing is no matter how much people think i've learned like i'm still learning by helping other people

right and when i do tell stories in yoga or i write on my captions or when i write for blogs or anything it's more not even like i'm not trying to teach i'm just like getting my own thoughts out and getting my own like demons out and just seeing them on paper and just realizing like you know i'm teaching myself through teaching others that's dope and that's interesting how that takes hold is like when you're just trying to do therapy for yourself and you just put it out to the world and it ends up helping others that's a crazy phenomenon because you know a lot of people i'll just use social media for instance they try to write for their audience instead of writing for themselves so to speak so they're trying to please others instead of pleasing themselves first so that's pretty interesting that you had that

type of insight yeah without even knowing it yeah I didn't really realize that till just, just now, just talk like that friend back home. I didn't really realize at the time how much that was my help when I thought I was helping him. You know what I mean? That's interesting. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. As you, as you started intentionally walking down this path, did you go through a period where you were, uh, doing a lot of projecting, you know, from the, from the standpoint of being a self-help asshole like the last chapter i just read you're that guy because because because of like the potential of ego i have inside me oh my gosh like it was even before i even like went through this big shift i remember being being with my ex and she was a pretty

developed person. Like she was pretty strong. And, but I was reading these books and I was like, you know what? I was like, I'm going to go off of social media. Like I'm really going to like become like this, this like monk. Right. So like, I was like, I was like, no more watching TV. I was like, no more watching TV. That's just making us dumb. Right. I was like, no more social media. I delete Instagram. I delete Facebook. Right. Like, and i'm just like getting up every morning and i'm drinking coffee and i'm reading and like i think i'm just like okay i'm on my way and this is before i really think this shift happened but in my ego i was like oh yeah i'm definitely and so it'd be crazy i i'd be reading and you know my my girlfriend at the time would be like watching tv

and i'd be judging her like she'd watch i'd say she's watching the kardashians which i still do not think she'd be watching but that was her thing right and she it got to the point where yeah i was i was judging everybody i was i mean back then like i was i could guarantee i was judging you right like i was judging everybody around me of you know thinking my path is the right path and everything i'm reading once i read it i am that yeah so i found myself doing all the time that's half the reason like what broke us up is i was just like this person who i was like i'm i'm enlightened i'm off social media like i'm reading you know like it was it was so disgusting but yeah i did that all the time when did you realize you were that guy like when did you when you yourself, have that mirror moment, I'll call it, where you're like, holy fuck, I am.

You know, you read these books and you're like, I am that guy. And then the dialogue, the monologue changes and you're like, holy shit, I am everything that I'm judging. Like when did you have that conversation I it was definitely after the breakup and I was to that point where I was kind of you would say on the other side yeah but I went back and I read I read it's called the war of art yeah yeah art of war the war of art yeah and actually really good um he used to be a phx um eric was that his name eric actually recommended to me and i was reading the war of art and it's like you know

there's small things in there but as i was reading these it's that reflective of like that's when i was reading that book i was like holy crap everything i was reading and thought i was i was the complete opposite but i was just too close to see it and reading that book after that was probably the the time where I kind of just reset everything and step back and um and I mean we all have we all still judge but you know it's a lot less yeah of um it's more like I'm not judging because I'm better than it's I'm judging um because maybe the potential I see in people. And a lot of time it's important for me, like I have to judge at a certain point. So to know that if I see the old me in other people, I need to know that and kind of direct my energy environment based on that. So I think to that point, judgment is still kind of important in certain ways.

Yeah, I mean, we're kind of walking through the layers here. And I'm really loving the flow of this conversation. When you get to the point where you realize that, yes, indeed, you are judging, but that judgment is coming from a place of projection, not reflection. Where were you at in your journey when you started to reflect more than you were projecting? I would say, man, this is crazy. Like as you're saying that, I've never thought about it before,

but I could definitely think of, so for me, you always say like like sometimes the people you collide with the most are your biggest mirrors, right? And I'm sure he wouldn't mind me saying this, but my boss at Alpha is David. Great human, great vision, great mission. But we, again, this seems to be patterns and I'll get back to that, but it just, now I'm thinking of these times where, um, I've never, I've never dealt good with having bosses. Right. So this is, and this is a thing I've been thinking about the past

week and even with you. So, you know, I lived a lot of time where when you're in your ego and you really think the way you think is the right way, you can never be open to anybody else's thinking. Right. And that was even the military. And that's why a lot of time I had a tough time where every boss I would get, like I thought my thought was the only way, you know, so I'd always end up butting heads with everybody that was my boss. Right. And it's and of course, it was all my own stuff. but that's been a pattern over and over and over and over. And it wasn't until David was my boss and I was going through this, this transition at the same time,

I'd be sitting in a, in a meeting and I would hear things that would like trigger my like ego, right? Or they they would challenge my the way i'm walking they would challenge the the you know my work ethic and stuff like that and i think that whole year of time spending with him was the chance for me to sit back and process things and reflect on not not having my ego judge what was going on but have my true self judge what was going on, but have my true self judge what was going on and be open to other people's way of thinking, constructive criticism,

and the fact that you don't have to absolutely agree with everything somebody's doing in order to respect their vision and mission and learn to work with it and around it rather than always challenging it right so that was probably the one time and that i realized that but of course you know more than most that that part of things so you know when bo was at phx uh you know there were once and once we got the ball rolling and you know it was starting to bear some fruit and some responsibilities started being shared and I couldn't wear all the hats and stuff like that, I wanted Bo to be my head coach.

But I still controlled the programming. This is where we collided. We didn't just butt heads. We fucking collided on the programming and uh back in you know there's when it comes to that you know now that we're here in this space you know i think you would agree there is no right there is no wrong the one that you follow is the one that works um and i don't think there was ever an instance where you know you didn't think I didn't know what the fuck I was doing it was just more so you'd rather do it your way exactly and ultimately

that's kind of what drove us apart and you know really you know made the opportunity to go open a gym in Canada and go do all those things, like worth taking a look at, right? And then I'll remember, you know, not being with you, but observing from afar this transition you're going through and not knowing all the details, but knowing that there was a transition occurring. And when you came back from Canada, I remember you reaching out to me and asking if you'd come back to PHS. Oh, I remember, yeah.

Do you remember that? I remember now, yeah. And I remember replying back to you. I was like, you know, brother, I love you. I'm sorry it didn't work out up there, but you just want to do things your way. And I just know with the foresight that I have at this point that it's just not going to be a good fit. And I'd rather preserve our friendship than create a toxic environment between the two of us. Yeah. You know, and we went radio silent after that for a good while.

So I really don't even know how how you took that but um fast forward three years you know uh you just happen to be on this end of town you're like bro let me come take a look at phx how's everything going and uh the energy about you was completely different you know like now I could see, like you, you can see in somebody that you've, uh, been apart from for a while that everything about you was completely different. You know, I, I really feel like you, you've come to a place where you've accepted who you are and what you believe and more importantly you accept people for who they are yeah and i think you really understand that regardless of whether or not you agree or disagree you understand that people are doing the best they can with what they have. Yeah, I think that's important. Um, especially when everybody's on their journey, I think, um, like hearing feedback's really important, right? And, and reaching, I think to tell everybody when you're, when you think you're on a path of growth, um, it's always, it's always

important to get, um, feedback from people that you, that one, one, have been in your life for a long time. That's why with you, you knew me before everything. And just people like you look up to and you may see like there's somebody you want to be like. And it's important to get that feedback. And I appreciate the feedback because a lot of times you could get stuck in your own stuff. And, you know, you may think you're changing and maybe you question you're changing. And you're like, well, maybe I'm i'm just being fake like is this really me until you hear things like that you never really know but until you until you ask a lot of time

you just will never know right and um i i've been thinking about this too and yeah just a crazy journey of when i came back to phx and um so i'll ask you something because this is something so when i first came back to phx and speaking of podcasts i remember when you guys first started the podcast yeah and um i was friends with somebody from there and you know we were talking and training and um i kind of you know i've always believed in like one thing i truly believe and i always will is to me and everybody does a different, I don't, I don't believe in necessarily the hustler mentality.

I believe in organic growth is what I want. And that just hustler works for some people. And I just think organic works for me. It's proven to be, it's proven to me, even the coaching with you, everything that's happened. So,

you know, we were talking about podcasts and I was like, Oh man, um, I, I wonder if he'll ever want me on the podcast. Yeah. Right. So, cause in my head, I'm like, oh man, I was his first coach, you know, we're back, we're friends again. Yeah. So that was a thought of mine. And I was like, man, um, but of course there was a little bit of my own ego. I was like, you know what? Um, I'll just let it go. And what will be, what will be. so my question for you is when

or when or what what did you see or when did you kind of have that mindset of you saw something in me that you thought was worth sharing you know I couldn't tell you if there was like a particular post or an interaction

or anything like that you know, would had me pose, you know, request you to be on the show is, you know, in watching Bo now, I know that you are walking your truth. You are, you are, you are who you are going to be for the rest of your life. Right. And you have, uh, I love the word evolved. You have evolved as a human being, uh, to, to the point that you're, you want for others more than you want for yourself. And that's, that's just proven in the conversations we have. The, um, the, the,

as I watch you interact with others, you know, it's, it's different, you know, it's not like you were an asshole before and, you know, now you're a you know, it's not like you were an asshole before and, you know, now you're a nice guy. It's not like that. Your energy is just different, you know, and, and listening to what you're putting out there, the stuff that you're, you're working on with Fark, you know, I don't know if you want to get into that today, but you know, you're everything about you is, is bigger than Bo. Yeah. It wasn't like that four years ago. Not even fucking close. Yeah, that's so true.

And to a fault back then, you would take ownership of everything that you did, right? To the point where we would have a lot of static as you tried, you wanted to, and you were taking actions to take ownership in the figurative sense of PHX from an operations and a vision standpoint. But I think now you're at a point as you step back and you take an

objective look at that train of thought that that's not your vision to have. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Oh, definitely. And like your, your, your growth has just been so impactful. And because that path is, is so fresh, you know, like I wanted to walk that journey with you. And I know that you're, you're now in a space where you're comfortable walking that path with us.

Oh, for sure. Walking with anybody and sharing that path. Yeah. You know what I mean? And I think that as you know, you were talking about before, once you realize that you're consciously pursuing this,

this enlightenment, you know, whether or not you believe that we can actually get there or not, that's a conversation for another day. Um, uh, you know, there's, there's a lot of places along the way where you really question is, is my, is my message worth putting out there? Will somebody respond in kind to my message? Will it be, uh, warmly received? And you start, you start questioning, you know, uh, the, the message versus the messenger, you know, now that I'm speaking this truth, are people only hearing it from my old self? That's the,

and you start replaying this dialogue and you have to break that wall and just start walking anyway. And that's when the magic happens. I feel like that's where you're at now. Oh, definitely. Cause, cause we have,

you know, that's, this is exactly why Jeff and I started feed me, feel me in the first place, because we would have these kinds of conversations with just us. Yeah. And you're like, man, I wish I was recording this. Or people like us. And we'd walk away from conversations like this all the time. Man, everybody needs to hear that message. And then like, it just resonated so loud at one point where we're just like, fuck it. It doesn't matter who we upset or who receives it.

We're just going to put it out there. And, you know, made it our mission to create the exposure for people to this train of thought. Because, you know, now that you're living in this space, you realize, too, that people just don't have the exposure to these conversations and then you just have to be you know good fortune has to uh smile upon you at some point that you're put in the path of people that speak that same language and you're like holy shit i'm not the only one yeah now it's like okay you know if we were fortunate enough to find these people, let's create access. You know what I'm saying? For sure, yeah.

I feel like now that's the path that you're moving into as well. Yeah, and I think it's important along that process of I think the worse your past you had, it's harder to break the mold of, um, one is, are people going to believe the person I've becoming or do people believe I'm the type that could help somebody since I was less than I am now. Right. Right. And,

um, I always, and of course, I don't know when the shift, um, happened of that shift of, and I'll use social media cause that's kind of what I use for it. There was just one day where, um, I just stopped carrying it and of course you think of

a lot of things and you could do this in sports you could do this basketball football like why does um why does lebron james vibe with me but curry doesn't right or you could look at it in podcasts why does joe rogan vibe with me you know, this other person doesn't, right? Or just humans in general. So, like, when I started to share my story, it's important to know that your story, like, the things one person needs, they will only hear it from you. Right? To realize that there's somebody out there that 100 people could tell them the same thing and tell them the same story but until they hear it from your voice it won't change their life and that's what i keep telling myself every day when i put something out there that

i really don't care who's going to disagree with it i'm only caring about that one five ten whatever message is that is that day that people reach out and be like, Hey, thank you. And, um, and just, you know, and really not getting arrogant about it, but letting those things keep you fired up. Right. And so those moments where I do think I'm like, man, and I see somebody else do something successful and I'm like, man, do I really, do I have something people want to hear? Right. Cause those thoughts always are here, but always bounce it back. It's like, no, like no like um i'm confident in the work i've done and i keep doing the work and i keep reflecting and i keep bringing myself back to those times to keep myself knowing that i do have something people want to hear yeah you know even if 10 other people are saying the

same thing it's not going to be heard unless it comes from me yeah that's cool and how has the law of attraction have you gone through your transition worked in your favor with people and all of the circumstances oh so i'm gonna say the negative one first i'll say the positive so a big part of this relationship that crushed me right yeah i was a very um i was a very self-conscious person right let's say this it was whoever, if they ever listened. But her ex was a very successful CrossFit athlete. Let's say this, right? In my head, my identity at that moment was a CrossFit coach and an athlete, right? So in my head, she already been with somebody better. I need to prove myself, blah, blah, blah. So this person became somebody I talked about all the time to her in

a negative way of, you know, do you still want him? He's better. And this was something that I'm talking came to, like, her getting out of the car on the freeway type of, like, fights. Like, this is how much I would, like, I would just hammer it and hammer it and hammer it. And this was this whole year. Moved to Canada. I still would talk about it, right? I'm 4,100 miles away.

And we are having a conversation one day, talking about this person, right? Like, you know, I don't know what it was. But sure enough, the next day she comes to me and is like, hey, this person reached out to me on Instagram yesterday. Fuck. Serious. And that moment, I was like, holy shit. Like like a whole year of negative energy like you know what i mean like i truly believe like why would it take that like i truly believe that day that i talked like i just manifested that and that's like the first experience i've had that i i think about

often of the power of manifesting and the power of karma like i literally i made that possible right i made me think about it i made her think about it i made him think about it that was it that was the first time i just like i still think back to this day i'm just like gee and this is before i really got into all this crap yeah and um now it's you know i try to be careful of every conversation I have. Every conversation that I'll have, even this one, I'll leave and I'll reflect on it. I'll see how it went. How much did I speak? How good did I listen?

What did I give to the conversation? Did I control it? Was I open? I do that every single conversation at the end of every day um i have this little tool that i can't even forget where i get it but i play my whole day back like a movie like i'm watching myself in a movie and just how i moved right like who i talk to um and i and i get down to like i'm a huge person on body language right like i don't really let anybody in my classes cross their arms, right? Like I just, I believe that that all carries energy, right? And

it's received. You don't really notice it consciously, but unconsciously you notice my body language. And so I really started just taking care of myself in that way of how I'm speaking, my body language. And just like when I started my own practice of gratefulness that i do every day the more i like really truly worked on my in inside and stopped worrying so much about what everybody else was thinking around me what they were doing what they were doing wrong um the more happy and like excited i became on the inside the more like that was like drawn to me you know i mean like so i didn't i don't necessarily i don't think it's I became on the inside, the more like that was like drawn to me. You know what I mean? Like, so I didn't, I don't necessarily, I don't think it's as important to like go out and search for

it and environments and people I think is important for you to become it first. And then all these opportunities, like I'm talking once a shift happened, there's, it's been amazing. Just the messages and things like this and working yoga opportunities just everything's been pouring in and i think it's just important that the more i just stick to my own energy and keeping that in tune that um you i mean it's everybody knows it it's you get what you give right and i tell people all the time it's you know people that don't really believe in let's say manifesting or the all the time, it's, you know, people that don't really believe in, let's say manifesting or the universe energy, you know, it's like this.

I tell people this, like, we all know they say that you are the most, like the five people you hang around with. Everybody could, no matter how in tune you are, that's just a common thing, right? Or they'll be like, if I hang around a certain person that's happy, like I'm just happy around you. And everybody could do, everybody could agree on that. Like no matter who you're talking to, the manliest man will tell you, yeah, that's happy like i'm just happy around you and everybody could do everybody could agree on that like no matter who you're talking to the manliest man will tell you yeah that's true like i'm you know i lift heavy when i'm with him i'm happier it's like yeah but so take that and explode it on a universal level like that stuff's real right and so if you mean you could feel it between us

why couldn't somebody across town feel it right like why like why is that so hard to believe you know so i just really started to like hone in on that belief of um that stuff you can't really see or it's not tangible but we all know it's there and why not try right like i tell people that it's like what if it's so, say it's not true, but what if it is? Right. Like, why not try? Mm-hmm. You know? And I think that's just where I'm at today.

And I'm trying to think about that of every project I'm working on, every avenue. You know, like Jim Carrey says, like, you could fail at something you hate, so why not fail at something you love? Yeah. Right? And I truly am just trying to really focus on that. That's dope. Yeah. yeah right and i truly am just trying to really focus on that that's dope yeah when did you uh become the protector of your energy because i remember having this conversation with you

i feel like this is a very recent shift for you in that uh before the open we had we would have conversations about energy and the people we surround ourselves with. And, you know, hanging on to people, you know. And then just recently, probably within the last 60 days, I've taken notice of it in you. You've changed the language from people to energy and preserving your energy and allowing the people who manifest that energy to change as you've changed. Man, I'm getting choked up about this. When I shifted my mission to be about others rather than myself,

and I say that because for the past three to four years, my wife now, Katie, when I went into that relationship, I was a very selfish person at the time. I had a lot of work to do, and I knew it. And I set the tone where my, I was the most important thing. And there's a certain line where I think that should be for everybody but I was real stubborn about it and I spent three years of devoting myself to myself right I devoted myself to daily meditation daily practices daily rituals reading journaling writing doing whatever I thought made me happy being being around positive people. And for a long time, it was just about me. And I'd say probably, wow, six months ago, probably exactly.

I don't know if I was reading something or listening to a podcast, but it was my relationship that first sparked this thought of I've been very fortunate that I'm with somebody that gives me more space than I could ever ask for. But then I started to realize what's taking a back seat, right? And that was one of the things. And so I kind of made this thing where now I'm reading more about to be a better companion. I'm listening to be a better companion. I'm listening to be a better speaker and teacher. And it was this shift it was that

and then i was seen on social media of just people that i didn't believe were um doing what they were doing for people i think that was just kind of a a curtain of like i'm helping you but i care more about you know me making money so i don't have to work anymore type of thing. And as soon as I made that shift to devote my growth, like my personal growth, I'm still devoted to me, but I'm devoting my personal growth to help others. That's when that shift happened. And that's when I think people started to notice. I don't know if you guys had two of my captions.

What I was sharing started to change right and i started sharing things again not to i was just sharing me in order to maybe help people feel not alone and to maybe make them feel like their stories were sharing and that's my biggest mission and so with that energy i realized i personally could handle a lot of negative energy right like um i believe there's certain people that are just born naturally happier and more optimistic than other people. There's the way you're wired, genetics. And I believe I was one of those people. And so I've always believed that since I have more to give,

I can receive more, right? So I could receive more stress than most people and not have it really affect me. I can handle more people's ego and not really have it affect me. But then I started to realize how even though I'm taking it in, that it was sticking with me. It was sticking with me when I went home. It was sticking with me when I had a conversation, say, with you. And I ended up bringing up other people because I just have this kind of gossipy, egotistical mindset going on. And so I just started to think if I'm really trying to help other people,

I have to truly protect that. And I tell people this all the time. Everybody has their own limits of what they can handle. But at a certain time, one of the biggest things I think when you become somebody that you know you have stuff to offer is somebody could only meet you where they're willing to meet themselves. And really being okay with that. And it's a hard thing to swallow. Like when you have important people around you that you know just won't hear you and they don't know they need growth or they're searching for it.

Like that's a hard pill to swallow to be like. And I'm sure you couldn't say stuff even with our relationship, you know, in the past. And that's definitely a hard thing to swallow. But I think the more you want to leave a legacy of compassion and sharing, you have to be more careful with that. Sure.

You know, so when I switched that mindset of other people more than myself, I had to protect it a little more. Yeah, yeah. What do you feel that where you are currently in your life, what's your purpose in your life right now? It's funny when I, you know, every time in your life you think you're in the right place in your life. And I've done, you know, when you start to think about what your, your passion or mission is, you, you have to realize what your gifts are and, you know,

so you have to look back, right? And, um, as I looked back, I've, I've done many different things, you know, just how I grew up and my personality in high school and being a teacher in the military and coaching and teaching. And, you know, um, I started to realize all these different things are platforms, right? Like CrossFit coaching is a platform. Teaching yoga is a platform. Um, but as, as long as I can remember, I've always been a talker, right? I've always been able to communicate. I've always been able to make people feel comfortable to tell me things they probably wouldn't tell other people. Um, so I think I realized my gift was, was talking, communicating. And, um, as I went through the path, um, my, it became communicating my story, which in, in my eyes is sharing, right? So I believe,

I believe the biggest issue today with a lot of mental health, and especially in men, is we're not open to sharing, right? We're not open to admitting failure. We're not open to telling people that I feel like I'm less than you, right? Like, we're not open to that. And I see this in yoga all the time where we stay, we, like, we think, I don't want to say we think we're special, but we, a lot of times we think nobody could feel like this and nobody's gone through this. I think we have those feelings. And if you really open yourself up and realize it might not be the same exact story, but somebody has gone through, I could promise you somebody's gone through almost

the exact same thing you've gone through. And if we'd be open enough to say that out loud and we found that person, then we don't feel alone alone anymore but unless you're open to sharing your story and it's sharing and not sharing your success story like how'd you become a you know a successful gym owner like sharing your story you're like what was your heartbreak what did it do like what was you know your parents's influence on you like those things is what I think will cure the world of a lot of the depression and mental health we're having. I think my mission is to be a sharer

to make it possible for other people to be comfortable enough sharing their story. In turn, it will unite everybody. I love that. I think that's the perfect segue into the the platform you're building now you want to put that out there in the universe oh yeah yeah um wow um

it's just crazy how things take so and this is you guys are definitely a good influence so um i appreciate you guys but um i'm one of the projects i'm working on now is launching my own podcast so congrats bro yeah yeah it's um it's called whatever i want um because i just i want to talk about whatever i want right i think i've built this network in this community where i have very good people all around me in different areas of life and i want them to share their life um and again maybe my own ego coming back from the past, but like, I've kind of just always done things the way, like whatever I want, right? Like good or bad. And it's led me here. So, um, the podcast is a big thing. And I just started that

because I was trying to search for, again, my passion and, um, and I love everything I do, but I wanted to try to, wanted bigger right and there's a lot of things people do like you know especially in yoga they because they start to run retreats right and they start going places and or they start teacher trainings or they start workshops and um i always i kind of thought about those things but it just didn't it just didn't vibe with what i wanted to share and how i wanted to live and i just i didn't i don't believe you know yoga is the only way in life to become a conscious human like honestly i've met i've met as many yogis walking down the street and in crossfit as i've met in yoga right so i wanted to have this avenue of just openness and a bigger platform so

um the podcast was was the answer that's dope when you when you're launching it uh two weeks yeah yeah yeah so um that's the one of the biggest projects and the the second one which is probably the most meaningful is um me and one of my really good friends, Ryan Farkasen, who's at PHX, we just purchased our LLC for a men's life coaching program business. And that started, you know, just how life in turns. I knew Ryan years ago. And we just ended up coming back together. And, again, just like me and Michael, we met again. We were, like, in this perfect place in our life where like we're just like vibing and we started training together and

after every day we train we go to chipotle you know and we the conversations were just like how you guys said the stuff you want to record and it was always tended to be around um like alpha male energy and just kind of what we thought that should look like and what we've realized in ourselves what i thought it looked like and what i realized it really is and it just became this conversation all the time of just helping just men mentally become like true leaders right like we like how do you take a societal person who looks like an alpha and make them like a true alpha? Like a real leader of kind of bringing that emotional side in them and realizing it's not about the words you say. It's more about the energy you carry and your compassion.

So I just started conversations. And then Anthony Bardeen, when he took his life, it sparked this thing. And Ryan actually reached out to me. And he said, hey, I want to make something and put it on social media. And he wanted to kind of use my following to try to get it out there. And so we made this little one-minute video. And Ryan's a social worker for the reservation, like an in-home family therapist. And very educated, very awesome-minded person.

So we made this one-minute video of just real things, right? Like if you have somebody that looks like they're trying to think about that, like how to speak to them, like real stuff. Do you have a plan? How would you do it, right? This and that, signs, who to reach out to, putting a plan into place of if they tell you this, what are you going to say? Like real life stuff. And we put that out there and, oh man,

the response we got to it was crazy. And I think of this one time we were working out together at Alpha. We're warming up. We're getting ready for cleans and um my phone goes off and i get a i get an instagram message of like a good friend of mine like admitting like they want to take their life last night and blatantly in a text saying i try to like i attempted to take my life last night. I need you now. And I'll tell you what, as much BS as I fill people with all day, and I truly believe I have what it takes to help somebody be happier, when you're presented with a situation like that where you're not making

somebody's day better, like you're literally saving somebody's life and you're trying to walk them take them off the ledge the confidence it takes and how scary that is to i question myself of am i bullshitting everybody or do i have i built and that's another thing why i keep doing my own work because i've have i built what i think is the tools to save somebody's life. And that was, you know, and Ryan was there with me and we worked together and, you know, we come from different sides of the spectrum of super educated and analytical and clinical. And mine is just, it's just a lot of self-education. It's a lot of reading. It's a lot of exploring. So with our two minds combined, I think we have this really cool skill set. And after that happened, we just were kind of all in. And he's so, it's another thing, you know, we talk about reflecting of people and asking

people what they think of you and people you look up to. And to have somebody like Ryan, who I think is such a good human and such on a good path, to have him reciprocate that and tell me, like, hey, I love what you're doing. I think you could help. Let's do this together. Like, that's so amazing. Yeah, we're just hitting the ground running.

So it's just Ash and Fark, Men's Life Consultants, and it's going to be we're building um just programs for one-on-one for men just to help develop their minds and work through issues in life whether that's financial relationship work you know whatever it is internal work and um and also we're trying to build just a community right of um you guys are a part of it now but we are trying to create we picked we went and hand-picked a group of people of men that we look up to and we think are um our kind of people and are putting out what we want to see in the world and um just trying to shift the energy of the world right like i say that a lot it's like be don't just be the person that shifts the energy of the room create

a big enough group to shift the energy of the world and i think that's important to do in in just men's lives right now just in society of how everything is going and um how men are being viewed how we view each other and i think it's just important thing to to put out there that's dope dude yeah dude massive uh before we let you get out of here today, um, I want to ask you two questions, answer them on any level, uh, mental, physical, spiritual, whatever resonates with you right now. The first of which is what do you do each and every day to feed yourself and stoke that fire, uh, that allows you the energy to move forward with your mission and your message? And the follow-on to that is what do you do each and every day to fuel yourself

so that energy carries over across the long term? This is so crazy. I'm going to use a story that just happened to me, but it caters to both these answers. So to feed me, I think feeding me is my own feeding of my internal work, right? So on Monday, I wake up and I have a morning ritual that I do every single day that's the same thing, right? So I wake up, I go to the kitchen, I get 20 ounces of water, I put some Himalayan pink salt in it, I put a half of lemon down the hatch. I get ready for work. I meditate for 10 minutes. I get in my car. I put on Les Brown, motivational speaker. If you haven't listened to Les Brown, he's amazing. And I listen to the same

videos all the time. I listen to that on the way to work. And I did this Monday. And those are the things that feed me, that I think create a good space in my body to be the person I want to be. So I'm feeding myself. And on Monday, I did all this, and I was coaching, and I was like, like I still felt funky, right? Like I just still was like, and I love Mondays. Like I think Mondays is the best day of the week. I'm excited. I'm like, fun energy.

I was like, man, I just man, I just don't feel right. So in doing this growth, I have certain things that I literally have written down on my phone that I know if I'm in a funk, that'll help take me out of it. And it just depends. This could be everything from a workout to going to see a movie by myself. And today, that day on Monday, I just thought it was I wanted good coffee and I wanted to read. And that's usually like how i one of my practices so um i went to dutch brothers and i'm sitting in line and i ordered my coffee and of course you know me and the girl taking my order was we're sharing our

whole life story because that's what they do at dutch brothers and and this is dutch was my by my house and all of a sudden i hear um somebody from the back look out the window and they go bow i was like oh yeah hey how you doing and i don't know this person and she goes i just want to tell you that i follow you on social media and i look forward to your posts every single day she's like literally you're so inspiring keep doing what you're doing this girl had no idea the type of day i was having and her expressing that showed me what fuels me is me sharing with the world and i didn't know that till then like i was having a bad day but i it's easy to forget

um what you might see as just a little thing how big it is and so feeding myself is my own internal stuff but what fuels me is when um i share with other people and i get that that feedback of like it's it's really inspiring so sharing i think is what fuels me there you go that's dope and where can everybody in our community go follow you and support you with everything you have going you could find everything i'm doing right now either on facebook just bo ash on facebook or on instagram um yogi hybrid and that's on there i'm sharing everything with my podcast everything me and ryan are doing and just um um i don't know if so everybody out there every day i try to share just some sort of life lesson I'm going through, something that's relevant, something that I either had a conversation about that week or something I'm dealing with myself of just real stuff that's going on in my life. I have to kick myself.

I have to ask you this one last question. I always ask people who have tattoos on their body because I feel it's a beautiful art. Yeah. And I usually poise the question as visual vocabulary. Yeah do your tattoos mean to you oh man i've had a lot of thought of my tattoos actually very very recently and um i seem like everything's like this life lesson everything i'm saying but it really is um i think i would never take my tattoos away because now i do really feel it's not so much of what they are it's the stories of when i got them and the ages this but um i'm not as into them as i used to be right like i think as my growth went on as much as i told myself in my

lower 20s that i just wanted art on my body and um i just knew it was because it got attention right and i and i tried to disguise it in different ways but um i do love the thought of people expressing their personality and how they look that's why i'm really into shoes and clothes and stuff that if i look at you, I could already get like a piece of your story. Like I really enjoy that. So the tattoos aren't so much the tattoos themselves, but it's the story behind them. It's, you know, behind the story of this 13 tattoo I got, because my mom was born on Friday the 13th. You know, it's the tattoos on my wrist that are from my best friend since I was five years old old who ended up going to prison for a while.

And this was our favorite book growing up. And it's just little stories like that, that now this little heart on my wrist is literally the reason I ended up coming to Scottsdale. So there's all these little stories. So it's not much less when people look at it like, what's this mean? It's where I was at in my life and if people would want to ask the story behind the tattoo. I love that. Awesome, man.

Yeah. Dude, we really appreciate you taking the time to join us on the show. It's been awesome to watch your journey, both up close and from afar. And I'm, I'm really happy that the universe has brought us back together. Um, cause that, you know, you're, you just exude positivity and you're walking that truth now. And I'm just happy to know you, man. I appreciate that. It means a lot, definitely. Guys, go out there. When the Whatever I Want podcast launches, make sure you support Bo's cause

as him and Fark get the men's group up and running. If you know that you are in need of that awakening, you now have a readily available resource. As soon as that gets off the ground and, you know, hop on social media and become a supporter of everything that Mo has going, he's making massive changes. So really appreciate your energy, man. Thanks, guys.

Appreciate it. And until next time, guys, Feed Me, Fuel Me. And that'll do it for this episode with our special guest, Bo Ash. If you want to connect with everything that Bo has going on, please visit the show notes on theshrugcollective.com. Also, be sure to connect with us on social media, including Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, at Feed Me, Fuel Me. We would love to hear from each and every one of you. If you found this episode inspiring in any way, please leave a

rating and a comment in iTunes so we can continue on this journey together. Also, be sure to share it with your friends and family on social media, including Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, or any other social platforms that you use. We really appreciate you spending your time with us today and allowing us to join you on your journey. We would love to hear your feedback on this episode, as well as guests and topics for future episodes. To end this episode,

we would love to leave you with a quote from Nas. I'm capable of anything. My imagination can give me wings. Thank you again for joining us and we'll catch you on the next episode. you