Barbell Shrugged - Feed Me Fuel Me  — Your Message is in Your Mess w/ Tony Grebmeier  - 93

Episode Date: June 28, 2018

Tony Grebmeier (@tonygrebmeier) is a partner and co-founder of ShipOffers and host of the Be Fulfilled podcast. Originally from Santa Cruz, California, Tony had begun a journey training for the Olympics in water polo before a knee surgery derailed his plan. During his rehabilitation, Tony would find himself addicted to pain medication and alcohol which would lead him down a dark path. Despite his eventual commercial success, he describes it as a process to hide his pain and addiction from the world. One fateful day, alone, and contemplating taking his own life, he received a phone call from a friend who would interrupt him and inadvertently change the course of his life. Over the past 17 years, Tony and two childhood best friends have built an extremely profitable business, and Tony has used the resultant resources to spread a message of prosperity and fulfillment. He has coined the phrase, "Your Message Came From Your Mess". He leads his guidance with a singular question, "Are you willing?" Are you willing to leave "life's dumpster" behind and move forward towards what you truly want from this life. In this episode, Tony walks us through the "Smile Exercise", a part of his daily routine that facilitates his GROWTH (Gratitude, Reality, Open-mindedness, Willingness, Teachability, and ultimately his Happiness). While honing his GROWTH philosophy, ShipOffers has become a Inc 5000 company for the past 4 years. Tony's life philosophy is centered around three fundamental principles: Chase the Wins, Study the Lessons, and Never Quit. If you want to know more, reach out to Tony on Facebook, TheFulfilledLife.com or [e-mail] If you're contemplating harming yourself, please seek help and utilize the resources mentioned in this episode. Suicide Hotline: [phone] - Jeff and Mycal   ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Show notes: http://www.shruggedcollective.com/fmfm_grebmeier ------------------------------------------------------------------------------► Subscribe to Shrugged Collective's Channel Here http://bit.ly/BarbellShruggedSubscribe 📲 🎧 Listen to the audio version on the Apple Podcast App or Stitcher for Android Here- http://bit.ly/BarbellShruggedApple http://bit.ly/BarbellShruggedStitcher Shrugged Collective is a network of fitness, health and performance shows that help people achieve their physical and mental health goals.  Usually in the gym, but outside as well. In 2012 they posted their first Barbell Shrugged podcast and have been putting out weekly free videos and podcasts ever since. Along the way we've created successful online coaching programs including The Shrugged Strength Challenge, The Muscle Gain Challenge, FLIGHT, Barbell Shredded, and Barbell Bikini. We're also dedicated to helping affiliate gym owners grow their businesses and better serve their members by providing owners tools and resources like the Barbell Business Podcast. Find Shrugged Collective and their flagship show Barbell Shrugged here: SUBSCRIBE ON ITUNES ► http://bit.ly/ShruggedCollectiveiTunes WEBSITE ► https://www.ShruggedCollective.com INSTAGRAM ► https://instagram.com/shruggedcollective FACEBOOK ► https://facebook.com/barbellshruggedpodcast TWITTER ► http://twitter.com/barbellshrugged  

This is episode number 93 of the Feed Me, Fuel Me podcast with our special guest, co-founder of Ship Offers, and host of Be Fulfilled podcast, Tony Grebmeyer. Welcome to the Feed Me, Fuel Me podcast. My name is Jeff Thornton, alongside my co-host, Michael Anders. Each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message related to our three pillars of success. Manifestation, business, fitness, and nutrition. Our intent is to enrich, educate, and empower our audience to take action, control, and accountability for their decisions. Thank you for allowing us to join you on your journey. Now let's get started.

Hey, what's good crew? Welcome to another episode of the Feed Me, Fuel Me podcast. There's Jeff coming to you from the meltdown in the desert. Our first guest of the weekend is Tony Grebmeyer, one of the founding partners of Ship Offers. And you just offloaded a podcast to kickstart another podcast. But real quick, I'm going to kick it to you because we're going to go real deep on this episode, I feel like. For everybody who doesn't know who you are or where you came from and how far along you've come with ship offers and whatnot over the last 17 years, kind of give us the cliff notes of your journey, man. Well, honored to be here with you guys. Got a chance to see you last year,

chat a little bit, then come back full circle a year, right? Lots of change to my life, but the thing that still stayed the same as me. I'm still here. You guys are still here, so we're good. Grew up in a small town in Santa Cruz, California. Parents divorced really, really early. G grew up kind of like uncertain because everybody around me, they had what I thought was certainty. They had mom, dad, white house, picket fence, you know, like the typical thing that you think of when you think of like success. Right. I grew up in the seventies, husband comes home from work, wife's waiting at the door with slippers, cocktails, sit down, let me go make dinner. So that was my vision kind of of like what life was. And that was so different than what my life

was like. And so pretty, pretty straightforward. And early on, my dad left my mom. I was three months old. My dad was gay. So now I had grew up thinking, is there something different about me? Right. Because if I look at everybody's picture and go around, I'm like, oh, that's not what I have. My dad's gay. And then wanting to spend time with my dad because I think every man wants to spend time with his father. Right. And I had a lot of struggles. Like I'd get in trouble, then I'd get taken to my dad's.

I'd get in trouble with my dad's, get taken to my mom's. So once again, a lot of uncertainty played into my life. Like where do I fit in? Where do I belong? So I was always acting out as a young kid. So growing up in Santa Cruz, I've always been able to make friendships fast, go deep fast. Cause that's kind of what I've always believed is like part of my life is to not live on the surface. Yeah. Dig deep. But man, God was challenging my heart through this entire process to kind of just say, Hey, like walk with me. But I was born into a Jewish family. I ended up moving and living with my father, sent me to Catholic school, got kicked out at, you know, at eight weeks. Then went home, got my ear pierced, had a fight with my mom. My mom sent

me to my, who now is my business partner's family. And I lived with them for a short period of time. They were Christian. And then I ended up marrying a Mormon. So like in a very short period of my life, right. And my first like 25 years of existence, I was exposed to a bunch of religion. Well, I, through all of it, I've been able to put it into a blender, like a Vitamix and hit puree and just believe that we can talk about that. But the concept is, is growing up, I had a lot of those little things. People are always trying to help me, but I was like, I got this, like, I got life. Don't worry about me. You guys keep worrying about you. And the next thing I know I'd get in trouble. I'd have, I'd act out at school, you know, and all these things happen that one of the biggest pieces that changed my life is I blinded somebody and one eye, um, we were in elementary. I was in

fifth grade heading into six over the summer. And I threw a record and hit somebody and slice them in the eye. And it was a total accident. Um, but but i didn't didn't really ever get over that like and i realized deep down inside that there was this thing inside of me and i wanted to find him i've always searched i've seen him one time when i was in high school but i think about him all the time almost daily like i change someone's life not for the good now i bet if we asked today he would say it's been for the better because it's probably brought him so much more than how you know you live normal lives right um so I I grew up and then I I moved uh through kind of life quickly got into radio I spent a lifetime in radio

broadcasting as an air personality um saw radios just a way out to be theater of the mind tell great stories did Did that. Played water polo at a high level. Thought I was going to go to the Olympics and be a goalie. Got injured. And that really began kind of the spiral of my life. Like I was going to radio, being the person behind the mic, but living with a lot of internal pain and shame. What age was this?

So I got into radio at 11. 13, I got my FCC license. Radio full-time, 18 until 26, 27. Okay. And I started having knee surgeries, and I started getting addicted to pain pills. And I started seeing kind of that pain pill thing take over, right? And I don't blame any of what I did on having surgeries. I blame it on having addictive personality, always trying to fit

in and trying to find a way to fit in. Sometimes, you know, we do stupid things. For me, I just kept chasing. Right. And that chasing really almost began to cripple me in all areas. So now I'm married with my wife and kids and, you know, and I'm empty inside. And that's really kind of like, yeah, I ran a business, got into a million and dad. I've had all these things that have happened. But when I look at life, it's always been about choices that have been placed in front of me and how selfish my needs were. I was thinking about me and nobody else. Yeah. Throughout this process, you know, the addiction process and, you know, overcoming a million in debt and the cultivation of these relationships going deep really, really fast.

As you're moving through this process, are you as aware and present in those moments as you are in hindsight now? When I was young, I didn't think about anything but me. And I don't know anybody who's listening right now if you can relate, but if you really stop for a moment, check your pulse and check your motives, there's probably been a time in all of our lives where we've been selfish. So until I really walked into the rooms and got some help for what I really believe was ultimately the greatest gift, right? Because that greatest gift brought me to the place where I was sitting on the couch after my wife looked at me when she dropped me off.

She looked me in the eye and she says, I don't love you anymore. I've been the one who had filed for divorce. We're three years separated back and forth now. And the reason why I want to answer your question this way is very specific because in that moment, I didn't care about anybody again. So I just cared about myself. Right. So I called her on the phone. I'm like, Hey, I think I'm going to commit suicide. I'm paraphrasing her response to something. All I remember hearing was, well, you got to do what you got to do. Damn. Right. And that wasn't meaning she told me go commit suicide. All I heard was you got to do what you got to do because she's

like, I've already tried helping you as much as I can. And you're not willing to change. You're not wanting to change. So all that I saw was once again, like everybody bailing on me, parents, divorce, I'm probably the cause of it. Blind of a friend. Gosh, now I'm the cause of that. Like all of these things kept coming up. So as I was writing my suicide note on October 9th of 2008 my phone rang in that act and a buddy of mine he said hey I'm gonna come to see you and I'm like oh shit dude like I just want to go I'm gonna put all my stuff away now like I gotta clean up again and five minutes later he knocked on my door and that's that's the knock that I really help people to understand that there's something that's knocking at your door. And are you answering it?

Right. Cause the window of opportunity is there, but the knock, there's something calling you. And when he walked in, he gave me a big hug and he looked me right in the eye and says, Tony, your,

it says your life has meaning and purpose, but what you're doing right now doesn't. And I said, no shit. I want to die. And so he sat down and for two hours we talked and the thing that was consistent was hope. I had hope for the first time in my life. And, um, it took me, it took me about two and a half months till I finally got enough courage one day to call my mom on the phone. And in that conversation, my mom basically 12-stepped me for 45

minutes 44 minutes it took me to finally say yes I have a problem I need some help and then the next day I walked into the room so I haven't had a drink or a drug since right coming up on 10 years and all that really changed was I stopped thinking about myself and stopped being selfish and started figuring out how I could get to know you guys how I could dig deeper into my friendships. My relationship with my mom today is just absolutely amazing. I talk to her every single day. She lives halfway around the world half the year.

So it's intention today. I didn't have intention before because my intention was I'm going to be intentional just to get what I want. And then once I get what I want, then I don't need you anymore. And today it's completely opposite. My life has transformed because of being right here present with you like there's nowhere to get right right like so what we do an interview great gets two downloads you listen I listen I win yeah you know why because I spent a great time talking to you guys right that's

the most important thing in my soul yeah if I can impact one person's life today that's why I'm still alive beating my heart still moving in the right direction and if that one person today is just to help me to remember what's your mission what's your purpose why are you here what what are you needing to do what else am I what am I also fighting all these things these bills these life issues and challenges that come away because that's what happens but when when you're present, right? Because there's no perfection. We chase it. We'll never be perfect. Right? And then the whole time that I'm thinking that I'm perfect, I'm missing out. And the most important thing that I have to focus on is you guys. So are you present in this conversation?

Right. What's the biggest fear you got going on in your life right now? I'm sure if we stopped, you could list a whole bunch of things that are going on. You could list a whole bunch of things that are going on. But in this present moment, what are you willing to do about them? And so I am now presently 100% focused on making sure everything that's going on in my life is impacting people's lives. That's awesome. I sort of want to take a step back to that knock on the door. What was it that brought that friend around at that certain time? Like when you're in

that moment, that dark place, how did that happen? Were you in contact with them or was it just one of those things that opportunities that presented itself in the right moment? I, I've always said, God sent an angel to knock on my door that day. God called somebody to bring my phone. I can't really reflect too far back. Yeah. Cause I used to black out. So like for me, it was just reflection. Right. So we're, we're really good friends. Yeah. Right. So obviously if you're really good friends with somebody and you, you kind of look at your friend, like, Hey, something's wrong. Right. I'll just your friend like, hey, something's wrong. All I'll just say is, like, it happened, it woke me up, and it put purpose and meaning back in my life.

So if you have a friend that you haven't talked to in a while, or maybe just pick up the phone and call them. Stop shooting them text messages, waiting for a response. Go knock on his door. Like, we have people today. There's more suicide today than there's ever been. There's more depression going around. People who don't know how to, and I'm not a license in anything when it comes to psychology

of the mind, the brain, the body, or anything. I'm not a doctor. But that concept is so true. Man, if you've got a friend, it's like you own a gym. Your friend over there says, I got this. So the next thing you know, he's benching 350 and the bar's wrapped around his neck. You're going to say, yeah, you got this, bro. Or you're going to say, let me help you.

And usually that help is just a little lift. Right. A lot of us just need a little lift today. That's wild, man. Just because Durs and I have had conversations before where we've had text, like you said, you mentioned like a text message conversation. But so much gets lost in the translation of that text message like and that we've made a pack like okay if there's anything important that we need to talk about pick up the phone and let's hash it

out whatever it may be at any time any hour of the day and just having that the relationship and those conversations are important because a lot of times that you said you have that friend that may be going through something, but they may not necessarily be ready to reveal that mask to you at that point. Right. Yeah. I spent a lifetime trying to look good to avoid looking bad. And that 500 pound gorilla, when you try to pick up that damn phone at like three o'clock in the afternoon, you're like, you know, I'm, I'm like in debt. There's no, no, there's no way I can get through this. Like nobody loves me.

All my friends are like running for the hills because they've heard the story, the tape. It's the replay. It's like Tony's in trouble again, right? Imagine if you just stopped and said, am I being honest and real with my friends? What tape would I be playing and my friends be hearing all the time?

Oh, I'm good. Okay, let's define good. I say I'm good all the time in my relation. I'm good. Tell me how many times have you used good? And like, I'm good at my relationships. I'm good in my finances. I'm good with business. It's good. And then you really stop and ask another question. Like, so define good. What's your definition of good right and then dig a little deeper and get your friend or you even like i love looking at myself in the mirror and i've created a five-step process to help you to like the person you see in the mirror because the reflection you see in the mirror is not the reflection the world sees of you because you're very different the way you look at yourself and then the way that the world perceives you. And I've had to do a lot of work

because I couldn't look at the person in the mirror before. I didn't like that guy that I saw. What's that five-step process look like? First, you just have to go in front of the mirror and just look at yourself and smile for one minute. Smile for one minute. Just, hey, what's up, dude? I like you. Because it's all a process, right? And what it really is is you to begin to see yourself so for one minute just look at yourself in the mirror second minute right look at yourself in the mirror and say i am good say i'm good man right we were talking about good right so right so good is something that we all are really comfortable at saying and then you begin for the the third minute and you stair step in this don't try this on day one to get all five done. I say like, do it over a week and get really good

at it and then practice it a lot. Um, I am contribution is for your third minute. I'm contribution. Like what I do matters. And I do show up and I want to make a difference, not only in my life, but I want to make a difference in my wife's life, my kids' lives, my friends, my business, all the people that I contribute to for For the fourth minute, when you're looking at yourself, you say, I am my word. Like I am my word today. Like that wasn't something that I was good at before, but today I'm my word. And when I'm not my word, I clean up my mess and I don't say, I'm sorry. I ask for forgiveness and then tell you what I did. And I ask that you repeat it back to me so that I can hear that you hear me. And then for the last,

the last minute is just, you just look at yourself and in complete silence, you just look at yourself and be okay that there's no, nobody talking so you can connect. So many of us are so connected to our phones. We're waiting for that text, that phone call, that thing, that email.

And we feel like if we don't get that response, something's wrong. No, life isn't all about you. Now, I want it to be, but I want it to be all about you and then your legacy, leaving an impact and helping people. And then you'll have contribution. And at the end of the life, there'll be this dash. And then they'll say he lived and he contributed. He was his word.

He was good. Like he made people around him better. So that five-minute smile exercise really begins the process of helping you to unpack. Now, you're not saying anything. You're looking at yourself. Then there's a whole process around that that we go through. And you can deep dive a little bit more. But I think the concept is trying to find that person in the mirror again. I had that conversation at 20. I was living in Modesto, California coming up on my birthday,

done a bunch of LSD. I was whacked out on, you know, marijuana and just, and I looked at myself and I'm like, is this what life's supposed to be? Yeah. Like I'm literally looking at me in the mirror and I'm like, so this is my life, right? This is what it's supposed to be. What do you want for your life? And I couldn't answer that question. So I found another 20 years had gone by, you know, I'm coming up now on 45. And I remember I'm like, I finally kind of know what I want for my life. That's what most people won't ever do is they won't look at that reflection because the reflection

they see is in the hey dude you're a great guy i love you you're good man i appreciate you and so that's a false self-centered piece of me what i really need is be good with god be centered with him because if i bring him into everything i do i can't go wrong i love that but i i couldn't do that before yeah you. We were talking offline about a moment that Jeff and I had had about we had a decision point as to whether or not we were going to keep the show going.

There was this major point of friction and after that conversation we decided to keep the ball rolling and keep the show going. Within a week of that decision, a lot of opportunities just kind of snowballed our way. And you had made a very awesome point about when you come, you're brought to these points of friction that are a test of your commitment. And how much you're willing to see a process through to the end.

And what's on the other side is really ambiguous. It's not obvious whether or not there is a reward on the other side of that decision. In your process, with all the experience that you've had up to this point, what do you do to be so present that you recognize points of friction as a reason to keep going rather than a reason to stop and pivot? I love that. Bridge. Think of a bridge somewhere in your life. It doesn't matter

where it's at and think about, are you willing to cross it today? Are you willing to take certain steps to get to the other side? And I think most of us say, yeah, if there's something in front of us, we're willing to get to the other side. I have faith because I can't see the end of the bridge. I just know that I need to take a step towards it because I needed to go keep moving forward. Right. I could live in my past, right? My past holds all the lessons of life. My message came from the mess, and that's in my past. What's in front of me is an endless amount of opportunity,

but the only thing that I have is this present moment because I have no control over my wife, my kids, my business, or anything in this moment, but I have control over me. And so being crystal clear and present, I have to have faith today. I can't see everything I'm packing, but I have to have faith that it's all going to be exactly the way he said it should be, which is whatever his intention is. My intention is just to be present enough. So when I feel, I get choked up about it, but when I feel deep down inside that calling, that sense, that two o'clock alarm going off, right? That, that thing that wakes you, I act, I don't just sit. Now it doesn't mean I'm gonna go jump off a cliff today. And with, you know, not thinking about, is it safe? It's about, am I intentional

enough to say I'm willing to go jump off a bridge or a cliff today? It doesn't mean you have to do it. It just means, are you willing? And if you're not, what's holding you back from doing that? Right. I think so many of us get to the point of wanting to get to the jump off point because they think there's nothing else that matters, right? Nobody else cares about me. I'm endless. Like, oh, I'm hopeless. And you're not.

You're being called towards something, and your pursuit is what you need to pursue. And you don't have to go buy a new business, blow up your business right now, but you have to be willing to move towards it. That's the calling that I think, you know, that was my message this morning. We're being called towards something. You don't have to be a believer in God. I just tell people all the time, you have to just believe, because you believe in something.

Follow your belief system. Just follow your belief system that's served you up until this point and says it's still serving me to get to me where I want to go? Or do I feel like no one loves me? I'm all alone. My world's crashing. So maybe you need a new belief system. And that's where I want to challenge people.

It's like, let's look at your belief systems. Your methodology is probably changed from when you were born until you're now. That's your belief systems. So let's just talk about that. And when I step into that, I realized, man, I've been through so much and I still have a really strong foundation. I have the most incredible, just awesome wife in the world. Like I shouldn't be here. And every day when

I take a shower, there's a, there's a sign that says, I choose you in our bathroom. And that reminds me to choose her because love's a decision. Sure. And so many times, like, I wanted to blow up that marriage even more. And then we decided, let's do this together instead of just two people trying to do it together. We made something that I believe really brought us back was just, let's do this together, right?

Stop fighting all those things that are going on. And we're coming up on 20 years of marriage this year. After a guy like me and through all the chaos and turmoil and three years of separation and just the crazy stuff that I've done, she still chooses me. I still choose her. And so there's hope that whatever it is anybody's listening, going through today, as long as your hope and you can't see the end because no one can we believe we know what the end looks like but are you willing to take certain steps to get you closer to where you want to go today or are you willing just to sit where you're at or you're willing to go backwards you've got to be doing something so why don't you try to move forward today

and bring your past which is really life's dumpster you've just been pushing around a giant dumpster all over your life. You just didn't know it. Everything you've gone through is sitting in front of you in a giant 10 by 20 dumpster right now. You guys married? No, I'm not. What's your wife's name? Nicole. So let's put Nicole on the other side of the dumpster and I'll give you this visual so you can do it. So I want you to stand on one side and Nicole's on the other side. And I want you to just close your eyes for a moment. Envision yourself from your childhood until now, everything that you've done good, bad, and ugly, you're, you're throwing into your dumpster. So just do that for

a quick moment. Just try to say like some things that you can throw into life's dumpster and go ahead, put, put like 10, 15, 20 things. Just start calling them out. Like, you know, lost at a soccer game. You know, I lost. Like, you know, lost at a soccer game. You know, I lost a friend, you know, my mom, my mom hit me. I'm just making this stuff up. Like, whatever, just start doing it. Go ahead for me. Okay. Uh, let's see. Uh, got kicked out of school. Uh, my dad passed away, uh, deployment to Afghanistan. Uh, my brother's in jail, got two kids, started a business, finished school,

got married. I'll go there. Okay. Just a lot. Like you can just even hear, like right, taking the story out of the story, just throwing a bunch of those things.

But if you really went back in your entire childhood and unpacked all that stuff, that dumpster is overflowing. Sure. Yep. All right. How long, how long you've been with Nicole?

We've been together five years, been married for three. Cool. So your kids on the other side too. So now I want you to just get this visual that you're pushing everything you just mentioned into Nicole and to your kids. So you're pushing that dumpster into them. That's called life's dumpster.

It's pretty heavy. It's pretty hard. No one knows what you've been through, but you know what you've been through. So you try and we do this. We start acting out. We start telling people like, dude, I've been through this. And they're like, that's cool.

But that doesn't affect me. It affected you. But you're right. But that's still you. And you're like that's cool but that doesn't affect me it affected you but you're right but that's still you and you're pushing that into them and so you're acting out in certain ways to no father like i lost my dad right sure i lost my dad four years ago and every day i wish i could call my dad i wish i could say hey dad i love you man like i know you did the best you could after his death i got a phone call from from his sister and saying, you know, every day when we were adopted, living with foster parents, you know, we were putting dog kennels in the afternoon. Like, we ate out of dog bowls.

Like, I wish I would have known that on planet Earth with him instead of having him live to the end of his life with all of that shame and guilt and life's dumpster, right? So now I want you to walk around life's dumpster for a moment, hold Nicole's hands, your two kids. Right. And I want you to turn your back to life's dumpster just for a moment. Just get that visual really, really clear. And if there's nothing in front of you, right, what's behind you, everything, everything else. So what's in front now it's clean, clear. You can create. Now I'm getting you to a space, not saying that your life's dumpster is gone. It's just saying now you're at a place like you don't have to be a hoarder anymore. You don't have to take all the shame, guilt, and remorse all by yourself.

You can actually create. So what's in front of you is a blank slate. I want you to become the Picasso of your life. I want you to become whatever it is that you said you always wanted to be without all the shame, guilt, and all the stuff that's happened to you holding you back now let it be there to be inspiring to help motivate you and push you i went to afghanistan i got deployed like i lost my dad like i've had all these things that happened but but now like i'm holding hands with my wife what do you want to create now you design a life that's worth living in front of you and now it becomes purposeful it's intentional like everything that you want so now you can say i want to do two things one i want to go do the work to unpack

life's dumpster i want to recycle the stuff that isn't serving me anymore and i wanted to use it to also help others so they don't have to go through the pain that i've gone through that's what i'm doing with my life's dumpster sure because my journey is unique to me but my story can be impactful to so many right we're at an event, Colby K, Meltdown in the Desert. We're talking about legacy. We're talking about leaving something. Your legacy is now. That's the message and the whole thing about now.

Your legacy is today. Stop waiting for it to be someday. Start living it today. All right, so let's create for a couple more seconds. So what would you create if there was nothing holding you back? If there was nothing like any of the shame, guilt, remorse, fear, or all those things, and it was completely wide open, what would you create?

What are some things, maybe you're doing some of them now, but like really dig deep for a moment and throw those things up on that board for a moment. I would create a legacy factory. Take what I've built with my current business, CrossFit PHX, and turn it into the fixture in the community that I've always wanted it to be. So describe that just a little bit more. I've always seen the gym and fitness as a medium for networking

and becoming a better version of yourself and making fitness the platform that all that stands upon and making a brick- mortar institution where people seek out to create opportunities together. Using fitness as that medium. What happens when I mention the if you can take care of yourself and put yourself like with like in the mindset of like self-care is the best care so often we're we forget about ourselves right we wake up in the morning we're into taking care of our two kids we're taking care of our wife we haven't taken care of ourself so i put self-care that's my version of your story right

i gotta put me as the most important thing right now not in a selfish self-centered way not with an ego right not edging good out it's really about i gotta put these things in front of me so i gotta remind myself every day when i look in the mirror and i look at that guy i'm like hey are you taking good self-care of yourself like are you really helping you to achieve what you said you wanted like in your picasso your painting of a lifetime so i want to hand you the brushes and i want you to go paint whatever that vision is. But then every day, I want you to be called to look at that because that's what you said you wanted in this moment. If you don't want that anymore, then be willing to paint over your canvas and paint again.

Sure. You can never stop painting. You can never stop creating. So life's dumpster serves two purposes, your past and everything you are up until this very moment. And in this very moment, everything that you want to be, you can detach yourself and say, I want to go do this. Life's dumpster, man, hurts. Life's dumpster is crushing. Life's dumpster stinks, right? You know, you don't get to a million dollars in debt

and then just get out of it one day just like that. You have to be intentional. You have to say, self-care. I got to take care of this guy. I remember driving my, uh, at a CLS after having an AMG SL 55 when I was married with my wife and two kids. And then when I filed, it was just me and my ego driving. There was no room for anybody else. It was just me driving this car and I couldn't afford it. So I took it to the dealer and I said, Hey, is there any chance I can get out of this car and into something else? And he said, yeah, you know, I can get you another car payment, $1,700 a month. It's I'm like the stickers, like $80,000. But because I was so upside down on one vehicle,

I transferred that into the next vehicle. So I did that for about eight months. And then literally I was like, I cannot do this anymore. I got a short sale in my house. We're moving. I'm going to drive this car to the dealership. I drove to the dealership, handed the guy the keys and he goes, Tony, what are you doing? I'm like, I don't need this thing anymore. I, I, he's like, but I'm like, yeah, but you, what are you going to do? There's no money. You're going to come after me for what? Something. I don't have anything. I've got nothing. And that's in my life's dumpster is how God used my desire to say, Hey, look, I can't do this anymore. I need help. Same thing when my phone called my mom and at 44 minutes, I said, yes, I need help. Like what other things in my life do I need to be keep reminded of that he's always there

he's always saying I'll you get to the edge I'll take it from here you just keep going and that's what we have to be inspired to is always keep going always have to keep taking specific steps to get us to that next level and that's life's dumpster because if you're willing to push it not even knowing you've been pushing it now I've told you that you've been pushing it in your entire life. Now, are you willing to get to the other side, grab your wife, grab your kids, turn your back to it for a moment and say, let's create the best life possible. What is it that I want? What is it that my legacy needs to be? What is it that my kids need that I don't know they don't know? Start asking better questions. Like for me, life's dumpster is everything.

That's beautiful. As you become more self-aware with, you me, life's dumpster is everything. That's beautiful. As you become more self-aware with, you know, life's dumpster and understanding, you know, your purpose and things that you've been holding on to, and you have that revelation, how do you go about seeking a positive structure support system to help you stay on track at that point? Because as you're going through it day by day, that's sort sort of tough you can get deep into a hole how do you you know build a structure of people to support you get out of your own way so to speak coaches and mentors okay so like the moment when I knew that I needed help I called my mom right so my foundation has always been to seek so

I called my mom and then I called a gentleman after my mom really told me like, Hey son, you need to go get help now. I said, okay. So I called a buddy and I said, Hey, will you take me to my first meeting? I don't know anything other than I've taken a test of life and everything that says I passed failed. So that's been my existence. So he said, yes, he took me the next day. And I realized what I saw was service. When's the last time you just picked up your phone to call somebody and they didn't answer? And you're like, well, I don't matter. And then you picked up your phone again and you called somebody else. They didn't answer. Call again. They didn't answer. Call again and answer. I say just like this. And if you remember

this is like the greatest teaching tool I've ever learned. You're not weak for asking for help. But so many of us feel like, you know, like you're weak. And I'm like, no, your greatness is in the ask. It tells you that you're not perfect. You don't have it all figured out. Just don't be an ask hole. So go be somebody today.

And I have tons of coaches and mentors around sobriety around finances i have around personal development overall with my mindset i have it around business i have you know relationships with my pastors and good stuff that helped me to really be strong and then i i walk daily with god and so if i have good foundation and accountability is available to all of us but don't be the guide who takes, be the person who gives. Get out of your heart and into somebody else's and watch what happens. Cause I've already shifted from my head to my heart by saying that I need help. My heart is where, what is like, I need, my head tells me I don't, my head tells me I'm a piece of, you know what? But when I'm in my heart and I get into somebody else's heart, that's where the greatest gift of life happens. That's where transformation takes place. That's where you want to talk about

deep. That's where deepness happens. Your head is like, Hey, you're good. I'm good. That's why it's so important that you ask questions like, what do you do for accountability? What do you do for mentorship? What do you do for coaching, man? The moment, you know, you know, you better go do something about it. Yeah. Cause otherwise you'll be an asshole and a year later you'll be like, oh, yeah, I didn't do anything about it. I don't want to be that person. I want to be the person who's pursuing life so passionately and he's inspired every day he wakes up and the mindset of like, dude, there's so much to achieve today. I got to be stronger than my strongest excuse. I got to go push myself faster today.

I got to go work harder. I got to call people. I got to get out of my head and into somebody else's heart. And when I do that, man, I'm in a much better place. Right? So what is accountability? Is it that you're waiting for somebody to hold you accountable to the thing that you said? So start being your word. That's why you go back to the smile exercise and you say, I am my word today. You start being your word around stuff, man, everything begins to change around your life. Your guys' commitment, right? You could have just blown this thing up, but your word was there. That's why it's so powerful to have accountability.

When you're feeling it, you guys have this, like, yeah, if we're not feeling it, we call each other out. That's accountability. So that to me is like like what's the essence of why your podcast exists because first and foremost it's because you guys were accountable to each other so you got to find that in other areas of your life like you have it here that's awesome but one day something's going to take one of you guys down just for a week a day a moment and you want to make sure that you're always knocking you're always you're always helping to like say all right cool i'm there for you so i have tons of accountability my kids are what hold me accountable today too and they don't even know it because i know i look at them today

when my son had told me his dad used to be the strongest man i know and now you're the weakest and i asked him that probably about a month two two months ago. And I said, do you remember saying that? He goes, I was six. No, I don't. And I go, maybe that was just God just telling me, son. I had so much faith and strength and belief in you, but you've just let me down. But I want to tell you, I still believe in you. And now I'm just kind of called to get back to like, I just want to be that person for my kids that my dad didn't know how to be for me.

And so that's why your legacy and everything that you have in you, you've been pushing, you just get to stop for a moment and say thank you. So I woke up this morning not knowing how the day would unfold, not knowing I'd be asked to be on a you know podcast with thank you on my heart just thank you on my heart like pure joy gratitude grateful for being alive out walking this morning message of life comes to me is like man in this moment of an opportunity don't waste it nothing's promised right because I can be that kid again right on the couch thinking man it's time no one loves me no one cares for me and i know that to be a lie i know

that to be a lie because i just told you that like the person i respect so much is my wife and i'm so grateful for an amazing partner so don't let life's little moments take you out from pursuing your greatness and never quit never quit on a bad day i love that man never quit on a bad day when uh so you get the knock at the door um but all the while you've been in you've been in business with your childhood friends since the beginning and uh that that knock was that uh from somebody outside of that network completely separate from all of that yeah completely separate um because my friend's closest to you right you don't you kind of let him in yeah but you don't really tell him what's really going on stay strong around yeah yeah um because i think like i don't want to let people down sure sure

so he the guy who saved me i talked to him on a regular basis he's one of my favorites on my phone i call him we talked we just talked two days ago i talk about him daily i walk into my office my office is filled with photos of the people who are impacting my life so i'd love to take a photo of you guys today and throw you up there too because you make an impact in my life right um so I didn't know John really really well we were Raider fans and we like football together we uh our wives hung out you know be over there for a barbecue or whatnot but in there is really where I think I drew strength and I drew a little closer to what John was seeing in my life was he saw for me what I couldn't see for myself. Yeah.

And he wanted to make sure that I had a mirror in front of me so I could see myself. And I stopped looking at that guy. I had so much shame. Yeah. You know, and I think that happens to a lot of us. Yeah. You know, when I talk about suicide, it's not because I'm like, ooh, it's some trick or game.

It's some deep depression stuff that we struggle with yeah and this is only the first podcast that i've really ever shared about blinding somebody just so you know it's kind of like the thing that i've been like meditating through is like maybe that shame that you feel could be helpful for somebody so that you they know that they're not alone because i felt alone i felt like i was a kid every day in fifth and sixth grade hiding at the principal's office, not wanting to get beat up. Yeah. Right?

So it was that shame, that guilt. So then I packed it down. Then I went through everything else in my life. Right? And then I got to the point where my wife says, you know, in my version of I don't love you anymore. So then I'm sitting on that couch thinking now's the time. Yeah. Wow.

That's the shame, guilt, remorse, pain, frustration. You know, you take all the things that have happened to you, all the things that I've gone through. They're unique to me. They're not unique to you. But it's in my unique story that I hope that I help somebody today realize I'm not alone. And we can do this. Let's get through this together. So you bring up a very good point, a very interesting point, you know, in light of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain as of late.

Like, where do you stand on just suicide in and of itself? Is it a permanent solution to a temporary problem in your eyes, or is it more complex than that? So I wrote an article a couple days after Anthony passed. And what I wrote is, my life sucks. You have to, in that time, like, I don't know the pain. I don't know what Kate went through. I don't know what Anthony went through. But if you become an archaeologist and you dig a little deeper into the facts right and you start figuring it out

maybe you'd see that there was some times in their life that um they didn't really ever work through and so you look at kate like i've dug a little deeper in kate specifically separation best friend husband um i think k Kate's dad just passed this morning. No kidding. Yeah. Um, so got to imagine that pain. I think 89 years old, 91, um, you know, losing somebody that you love so much. Um, I remember, uh, Carrie Fisher passed, um, you know, she'd been fighting the demons of life for a long period of time. And then I think her mom passed like a couple of weeks later. Like the heart has this really weird way of calling you. And, uh, when I was suicidal, the one thing that I had to answer the question to is it's

temporary. That thought will pass. Um, but if you have a lot of accountability around you and you're really real with people my friends all know like if you talk to me we're not talking about like i'll talk to you about baseball football i'll talk to you about basketball i'll talk to you about like business but that's awesome when's the last time you had a real deep conversation when's the last time that you really look at yourself and go i'm fat i'm not where I want to be, I'm ashamed that I've put my family through so much pain, and then kept digging deeper and figure out why you feel ashamed,

why you keep doing it, and then doing something about it. I don't know why my phone rang. I'm just so grateful it did. I mean, Anthony's best friend found him dead. They were filming the day before from what it reads, filming an episode in France. And it was like laughing, happy, everything was good. And then everybody first goes to, what drugs did you use?

It's like we go, we're such a bad society because we go to we're such a bad society because we go to the enemy first i have compassion for the family the friends the people like who lost somebody that they loved man we're sick man we're sick as our secrets and uh man like if you don't get those secrets out like we'll take ourselves out in the moment. I believe the devil works when I'm least expecting it. He's found a crack, and he's in just like that same crack that God can come in. And so Anthony, Kate, my heart goes out to their family, their friends. I mean, look at David Spade.

That's like the brother-in-law signing a book deal, signing autographs in a venue, trying to get through the day. Just you feel for people. And the problem is that no one gets out alive. Ten out of ten die. So we're all going to die. We all are going to die. But, like, imagine if we could have, in the moment,

Anthony was thinking about, it's so bad, let's do this. Or Kate was like, you know, go ask your daddy. Like, the shame, this is me saying I was there and I wasn't thinking about anybody but myself I wasn't thinking about my kids I wasn't thinking about my wife I wasn't thinking about my mom my dad my business partner my sisters I wasn't thinking about any of those people I wasn't thinking about anyone but myself and I was just selfish and self-centered now medical if you feel like you know what I need it,

there's assisted suicide, all that kind of stuff, I don't have an opinion on any of it. All I know is the question was, how do you feel about suicide? It's selfish. And if you're in pain, seek counsel, seek help, go see a doctor. If there's a suicide hotline, I would love to see that get put in this because we're talking about suicide. Call it. Tell them you're struggling. Tell them

that you can't continue. And let somebody speak to your heart today and get you out of your head. That's where I think real transformation begins is when you let go of what is, everything that's going on up here, and you just find somebody to hold you, someone to love you, someone to accept you, someone to say, me too. I've been there. You know, it's not fun. There's a lot of shame. There's a lot of guilt. There's a lot of remorse, but you don't have to do this by yourself. And you're never alone. It's just, are you willing to ask for help today? And that's why I say asking for help isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign of your greatness. And that's really where transformation for me began is I didn't, I didn't ask for somebody to call and knock on my door. That's why I say, man, like, don't, don't quit on a bad day. Yeah.

Cause man, the good stuff is coming. Like there's a, there's a saying in the rooms that says, you know, don't quit before the miracle happens. Right. So I'm grateful that the miracle is on its way it's coming that's beautiful where do you see yourself now like with your current life's purpose and where do you see yourself do you think that purpose is going to remain the same for the next 20 years of your life okay no so here's what's really crazy so I run a podcast. We talked in the intro about going into iTunes. I just blew out 200 episodes. Just went to lead. And in there,

I did it for one reason and one reason only. I didn't like that version of my life's dumpster. So I did my recycling. I was like, fine, I got the content. I still have all the episodes. I can still push them and break them up and use them for something down the road. And all the people who gave me their time and energy, I love them. I'm appreciative of them. But I'm like, that was my, that was my message then. My message now is I want to help people become more fulfilled in their life. So my podcast now is called Be Fulfilled. And it's the real stories behind success. Take money off the table. So what is it? Like it's deeper conversations. I interviewed two people in the last week, Jordan Harbinger, we were talking to him,

and then Casey Stubbs, complete giants in both of their right professions, industries and everything. Context of the conversation started out the same. What's your definition of success? You give it, like, here you go. Most people say to find fulfillment, to be fulfilled, right? So the title lines up with kind of that question. And it didn't work out like that in the beginning.

It just kind of happened to work like that now. So in the last six months since running the show, what I've found is, is that it's shaping more up to my Facebook community that I run called the be fulfilled life.com. You can just join it. It's a bunch of passionate people from around the world, entrepreneurs, engaged, small community. It's passionate about just come join it. It's a bunch of passionate people from around the world. Entrepreneurs, engaged, small community. It's passionate about just come join us. And why I tell people to do that is if any of my message resonates with you,

you're going to find more of that there. So I take the people from the people who listen to the show and say, hey, if you want more, let me give you some tools. So I give you a tools that I call drainers and drivers. Bring awareness to your life. What things are draining you? What things are driving you? Let's figure out how to have more that I call drainers and drivers, bring awareness to your life, what things are draining you, what things are driving you. Let's figure out how to have more drivers, less drainers, then give you a community,

which you and I were talking about accountability. So I'm all about the accountability piece. So I bring that and then I'm pushing out my journal. That's a scripted journal. That's prompts that basically help you over a 12 week process to unpack the methodology that I've designed around growth. Growth stands for grateful, real, meaning you want to be grateful. You got to find gratitude. You got to find something that's working in your life. Get real with yourself and real with others. Be open-minded to what I'm

talking about today. It doesn't mean you have to follow along and say it's your belief system. Just be open-minded to it. The W stands for willingness. Be willing today to look a little bit further. Investigate. Become the architect in your life, the archaeologist. Dig deeper. Like, look what's really, really, really going on. And then be a beginner every single day. Become teachable.

So the T stands for teachable. So begin every day as a beginner and show up to be taught. Life is teaching you a lesson. There's good teachers and bad teachers. Start following around and finding the good teachers, the ones that you really want to follow. That's why accountability is so important. Why you have mentors and coaches and being okay to say like, this isn't working anymore and moving. And then the H for me is like the piece, right? It's like, it's the perfect piece, Happiness, right? Be happy. So if you go back to

the beginning, I'm talking about be fulfilled. So be grateful, be real, be open-minded, be willing, be teachable, be happy. That's growth. And it's applicable in all areas of my life because when I'm not operating in one of those, it tells me that I'm selfish and self-centered and I'm doing things for the other reason, right? Money always follows always. You'll always find your success when you are willing to go to any length to get it. But in the sense of, is it serving others or is only self-serving myself? And when I build community, I build it for others because I needed it myself. So what I needed, I'm building. And so a journal is coming out, writing a book. And eventually, you know, I run an eight figure business. It's been around for 17 years with my two childhood best friends.

I go every day into the office to help be a visionary for where the company's going, but also remind everybody where we've been. So everybody knows that me too, man, you've got through that and you're still going strong and you're an Inc. 5,000 company the past four years, but you weren't one the first 13 years. Wow. What happened? How'd you do that?

What's going on now? Business is good. It's not as good as it used to be. We're getting better. We're making some pivots. The industry changed like it's ups and downs. Wow. Like, okay, Tony, you mentioned good. Yeah, but I'm and downs. Wow. Like, okay.

Tony, you mentioned good. Yeah, but I'm getting better. I got a new person. We're here with them. Sales director. I didn't have that in the last 17 years. I was the sales guy. So now I've got support, benefit.

I've got people helping me. So we're working together. We're collaborating. That's the thing that so many people don't see. So in 10 years, where do I see myself? I see this movement that I am working on, being led and being called in so many different people's lives. It's not a woo-woo or a, ooh, you got to go do this spiritual thing to get to where you want. But if you're sick and tired of where you're at and you're sick and tired of getting up every single day and trying to figure out life by yourself, come join a community of people who've been there too. So in 10 years, where do I see this?

My wife and I's goal at the end of next year is to be living half of our life in Italy, half of our life back in the States. It's kind of funny because I mirrored my mom six months out of the year living in the UK, six months living in the US. You got to have people that you mirror, people that model after.

I hate the statement, let me pick your brain. Like I don't want to pick anybody's brain. What I want to do is like, can I buy you lunch? Can I buy you dinner? Can I do something to help you? But I'd love to ask you some questions. And I'd love some insight that I could gain some knowledge for yourself, for me as well. And so in 10 years, I'm running Masterminds.

My books are translated into 30 different languages, right? Like everybody around the world is seeing the work that I'm doing and finding themselves in it. Like the last couple of days have been really deep for me. Like, where do I think this brand can go that I'm working on? I'm talking about, you know, a recovery book, having somebody wake up every day who's struggling with drugs and alcohol to be able to fill out where they're at, like their mood, how they feel health wise, how they feel financially, how they feel and start talking about their feelings. I want to do one for marriage. So like, it's been crazy that like, when you focus on what it is, it grows. And I'm being led and called to focus on finding fulfillment

and helping others to find fulfillment in their life. I'm not a prophet. I'm not Moses or anything. I'm just this guy who deep down inside wants to help people. And that's the whole community that I built. That's why my podcast for me is so much more, like your podcast probably more today in alignment with your soul's purpose than when it started out.

100%. Something's calling you today in your podcast. Maybe like you say afterwards, this is what I always like to tell people. I'm like, dude, that interview was whack. I can't play that. I'm going to delete that. Something in your soul is telling you like that's not what we should be doing. And what I've always said is there's a message that you heard today in that mess of a podcast.

What is it that I can learn? What can we learn to do differently? So I remind people to chase the winds today. The winds, W-I-N-S. Study the lessons and to never quit. So where will I be in 10 years chasing the winds studying the lessons and not quitting and that's the question that you can ask yourself where will you be in 10 years you still going to be chasing the winds studying the lessons and never quitting

or are you going to start quitting because now your lessons are losses and you don't know what to do anymore and you want to give up because you're not winning anymore dude I'm here today to because you're not winning anymore. Dude, I'm here today to tell you I'm winning right now in this episode. Like the lesson I'm learning is humility, being humble, being grateful.

Somebody's teaching me something today. And I'm reminded not to quit on my passion, on my dream, to pursue those things that I want. So when I listen in 10 years, I'm like, I did it. I did what I set out to do. And if if i did it what was the lesson that i learned and be inspired enough to keep moving forward by chasing those things dude this is dude i love that man man that resonates um before we let you go uh and you kind of touched on it throughout the show but i really want to drive it home right here by asking you two questions and answer them on any level. What are your, pertains to your daily routine? What do you do each and every day

to feed yourself and kickstart your motivation? And the follow on of that is what do you do each and every day to fuel yourself and create that sustainability and that carryover from one day to the next. Two powerful questions, so I love it. Number one, get up every single morning. And Wayne Dyer does this and did this so perfect. If you never get a chance to take a moment for yourself, do it. And watch the movie The Shift. And YouTube it. In there, he talks about every morning when he woke up

about saying thanks or thankful right so like in the morning I wake up and I stretch thank you thank you thank you and in there then transfer to a routine

that looks like getting connected so reading the Bible, taking a walk, uh, you know, you only get so many sunrises and sunsets, so don't miss any. So get up,

go take a walk, go get your body moving in a direction towards something that you want. Right. Um, self care. That's why you were talking about self care on your board. Right. So I am like, I'm all about self care and I've done a bad job over the years about it, but it means

today you can start, right? Like you don't have to beat yourself up over it. So that, and then I journal. I spend time taking my thoughts with God and putting them down on paper or putting them to some medium, a podcast, a little mini episode called Raw and Uncut, another way of just putting it in my notes, putting something on my community or out to the world through social media. So creating assets. Take your thoughts and put them down, even if you don't share them, but create them, because you want to be able to reflect back. That's the lesson of life.

So I do that. I get to work every morning about 8, 30, 9 o'clock, run my day until 5.36. I love hanging out with my team. The team is like the most important thing for me because when I'm there, I'm with the team. We're winning. We're facing challenges. We're doing things today that I didn't think I'd still be doing 17 years later. And I'm having fun. Play pool towards the end of the day with my sales team because we're always talking about that next shot. You got to be willing to chalk it up and be willing to take that next shot. You can't ever be afraid of missing. And when you hit the cue ball and sometimes it doesn't go where you want to be, are you willing to put some more chalk on your stick, line up again and try again? And so we talk about that in sales. We talk about being willing, right? So we do that. I get home,

hang out with my family, whatever it is my family family wants to do I've got two teenage boys 17 and 19 17 year is Starting his senior year in high school. My 19 is starting a second year in college Being present with them got two puppies at home that take all of our time And I love just doing whatever my wife wants to do And this is the other thing that I think is really important. My first thought is wrong usually wrong I'm selfish and self-centered in my first thought. So sometimes when I come home after a long day, she's like, do you want to take a walk? I'm like, no.

Center myself for a moment. I'm like, sure, I'd love to. It's so crazy, but that's a routine, right? Like I got to get into that. And then I really just try to eat well. Owning a health and wellness company, you kind of want to make sure that you're a little product of your product. So you want to take your supplements. You want to make sure you do things well.

You want to be who you say you want to be. So I need to be my word. And when I'm not, I clean up my mess. And I have accountability around all of that. So I have somebody that I walk with. Every morning we FaceTime. Hey, what's up? How you doing?

Like, what's going on? We talk. And then I think the piece that really for me that is number two, talk a little bit about is mindset. Man, I'm not here today because I'm perfect. I'm here because I'm flawed. I need help and I've asked a lot of people to help me. So be bold today and whatever it is that you asked for. So you look at your phone and you say, how many calls, how many things did you do yesterday to reach out to somebody? I say at least do five. Get five out of your norm. Take five out of your favorite list and stop calling the same

five. Go be bold and go into your phone. In my program of over 144 different people that could call at any time to say I'm struggling today. So be bold and go call people today. Well my coach and mentor mentor, really, really dear friend right now, he's all the way across the world. We've been texting still on a regular basis, and he was in Jerusalem the other day, and I said, you know, what's your walk been like since you've been there? The same or different?

He's like, the same and different. And so we've been talking about, like, what does that look like? And he's with a buddy of his who's a pastor. It's just about, like, going deeper. So many of us live on the surface. Challenge yourself today in that second piece to be bold, to do something different. Get out of the roller coaster. Get off of it. Most people get on Monday and get off on Saturday. Get one day to get back into the game of life and then go through the routine again. And they're

really stuck. I say, get back into the line of life. Stop trying to get just onto the roller coaster and have those little bursts of three minutes. Because here's what I want to leave you with today. If I can get you guys into the line of life, which is the line of anticipation. Remember when you were a little kid and you were at a theme park, water park, movie, any place there was a line, you were always like,

the line is so long, like no one's gonna, mommy, daddy, how much longer? Like, you begin to see that. Like, that's the thing that you remember as a kid. But you always were going somewhere. I got to get people back to going somewhere again and sitting in line, meeting new people. Look, there's an event going on. I'm in the line right now.

I could have rushed in, caught one speaker, got to the next speaker, got to the next speaker, not the next speaker. I had no time to apply anything. I'm here. I'm applying myself and learning from you guys, going through a process. I'm being teachable today. Right? I'm not teaching. I'm learning.

So get in the line of life. Break bread. Meet new people. Stick out your hand. Say, hey, how are you? I'm Tony. Nice to meet you. Is there anything I can do for you?

But be genuine about it. Got an Uber ride over over here this morning we pull into 7-Eleven and I say to the guy I said do you want anything he's like I'm like do you want anything I'll get it for you like whatever it is and he's like how about a bag of Doritos I'm like hot he's like yeah so I bring him two bags to say thanks I didn't have to do that I could have just kept my Uber right I was already paying for it anyways but But to see, then that's when the question asked, we talked about it before the show, which was if you could have anything endless and it never run out, what would it be? Like that, that wouldn't have happened if you would have just given us our Uber ride. I gave, received, gave, receive. So I want to make sure today I give tons of value because I'm always willing to receive it.

But if I'm not in the right mindset, I'm not ready, even present. I'm so worse. I'm all, hey, yeah, I'll be over there soon. Yeah, click. And I'm not having that internet, you know, that connection. So I'm all about connection today. I hope that's been helpful. That's huge.

Absolutely. Right? So number one, build a routine that like literally serves you. And when it stops serving you, realize that it's okay to change. Number two, like get yourself right. Find something that you believe in and ask for people to help you on that path. And then if you do all of that, then you can get to the end of an interview and say, I'm good. I'm really good.

Because if I'm good today, in my pursuit of greatness, I'm right where I need to be because I'm never going to give up because I already know what that looks like. I love that. Where can everybody in our community go support you both personally and professionally and support everything that you have going?

I think if any of my message resonates with you, go to thebefulfilledlife.com. It'll get you access into our Facebook community. Be willing to play full out. Don't hide out. Get out of the stands and into the game. Like, here's the dribble. Will you be willing to shoot?

If you're not, let us help you. Let us get you into the game. That's number one. You'll find my podcast in that community as well, the Be Fulfilled Life podcast. And then I'm just Tony at shipoffers.com, S-H-I-P-O-F-F-E-R-S.com. And those are the best resources to reach out to me. You can connect with me on Facebook if you feel like it. But just be realized that if you connect with me, be willing to be challenged because I'm not going to let you just hide out.

I'm going to call you out because so many people called me out when I was hiding out that it's inspired me to do the same in return. There's something passionate about getting dirty. There's something passionate about when you're called towards a message that you realize that, man, my mess that I went through, took my wife through millions in debt, like life altering stuff, the things that I've seen and experienced that if that can resonate with one person, like I said, man, why wouldn't I want to do that every single day? That's the fuel that lights my fire. That keeps me inspired. It keeps me moving in a direction that is something that is so hot right now in my life that I never want to burn out. I want it to be one of those things that someday somebody talks about, like we lit this because Tony, Tony ignited it and we

never want it to burn out. We want the world to see like that flame is available to all of us. Beautiful. Love that. Yeah. Dude, thanks for taking the time. No, thank you. Really appreciate it for everybody out there in the Feed Me, Feel Me community. If anything that Tony talked about today resonates with you, again, like as he said, you know, your greatness is in the ask but be willing to be

called out and be challenged uh but he is a resource and he's made those resources available so we really appreciate you taking the time honored and and and if you're sitting there with like any thoughts like i don't want to be here anymore reach out to me even more for sure that's part of like why i do what i do is because I know that there's people who feel like that. I love that. But I appreciate you guys. Appreciate you, brother. It's an honor.

It's an absolute honor. And yeah, if anything that I've said you want more clarity on, shoot me a message. For sure. If there's anything I can do for you personally or professionally, reach out to me as well. I'm always looking to grow. So what I'm willing to receive today is also what I'm willing to give, which is everything.

Well, the lessons in teaching, brother. Yeah, it is. I love that. Much appreciated, man, for everybody out there in Feed Me, Fuel Me land. Until next time, Feed Me, Fuel Me. If you or a loved one is experiencing a tough time

and contemplating harming yourself, please be sure to use the resources provided in this episode and also reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. The number is 1-800-273-8255. And that'll do it for this episode with our special guest, Tony Grebmeyer. If you want to check out everything that Tony has going, check out the full show notes on theshrugcollective.com. Also, be sure to connect with us on social media, including Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter at FeedMeFuelMe. We would love to hear from each and every one of you.

If you found this episode inspiring in any way, please leave a rating and a comment in iTunes so we can continue on this journey together. Also, be sure to share with your friends and family on social media, including Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, or any other social platforms that you use. We really appreciate you spending your time with us today and allowing us to join you on your journey. We would love to hear your feedback on this episode, as well as guests and topics for future episodes. To end this episode, we would love to leave you with a quote from an unknown author. Let your mess be your message. Don't let your trials get you down, but let them inspire someone else. Thank you again for joining us and we'll catch you on the next episode. you