Barbell Shrugged - Stop Obsessing, Start Enjoying: How to Be at Peace with Your Gains and Have a Hella Fun Time Training Again

Episode Date: March 30, 2016

How to be at Peace with Your Gains and Have a Hella Fun Time Training Again

This week on Barbell Shrug, we talk about how to stop obsessing and start enjoying your training. Hey, this is Rich Froning. You're listening to Barbell Shrugged. For the video version, go to barbellshrugged.com. Hey, I see you sitting there, lonely by your keyboard. If you want to, just whip your fingers out. Put them on your keys. Type in http://www.barbellshrugged.com. While you're there, swing on over, sign up for the newsletter.

We'll send you some cool free stuff. And make sure to check out Overtime. it's a sweet place with a bunch of sweet stuff and last but not least i know you're trying to find a bitchin t-shirt to get your mom for a birthday head on over to merch.barbell shrug.com Ah, skip it, skip it, skip it, skip it. Stop, stop, stop. Just stop. Stop zero. I'm reading. Gonna kill you. Shit, son.

Welcome to Barbell Strong. I'm your host, Mike McGoldrick, here with Kurt Mulliken. The Scoot-a-Doo guy. Use your voice. Hey. Coach Mike McElroy and Alex McElroy. What's up? I did it again.

We're all coaches, but I just like calling him Coach Mike McElroy. Coach Mike. Here at Hit and Run, downtown Memphis, once again. Today we're going to talk a little bit about how to stop obsessing the result in your training and how to start enjoying the practice of it. How to have fun. How to actually have fun again. Or bring the fun back if you've been lacking fun.

Absolutely. So if you're someone who is kind of dreading going to the gym and you just find yourself running through the motions. Or just a complete basket case when it comes to training. I know some people who are like that personally. I'm not going to name who they are, but basket cases. Shit freaks them out and they freeze up and can't perform. Yeah.

So when we were writing the notes for this show, Alex brought up a paragraph that was written that Barbra Streep posted. Not a paragraph. They freeze up and can't perform. Yeah, so when we were writing the notes for this show, Alex brought up a paragraph that was written that Barbra Shore posted. Not a paragraph, it's a poem. Okay, a poem. Did you go to school? In the form of a paragraph? I don't even know what kind of poem to call this. I was trying to think of it.

It's not a haiku or anything, but I don't know. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, right. So the point is that when we read it, it resonated perfectly with the notes. Should I read it? Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah, right. So the point is, is that when we read it, it was like it resonated perfectly. Should I read it? Yeah, I think so. It was it went along perfect with what we were. Yeah.

So I got my got my Chris Moore post this on Instagram a couple couple weeks ago. And I'm going to I'm going to mispronounce this guy's name, but it's Chuang Tzu or whatever. Sounds terrible. Yeah, I'm part Asian, and I totally screwed that up. But the poem was called The Need to Win. And The Need to Win. When an archer is shooting for nothing, he has all his skill. If he shoots for a brass buckle, he is already nervous.

If he shoots for a prize of gold, he goes blind. Or sees two targets, he is out nervous if he shoots for a prize of gold he goes blind or sees two targets he is out of his mind his skill has not changed but the prize divides him he cares he thinks more of winning than of shooting and the need to win drains him of power oh man so powerful yeah that that makes a lot of sense and just what like we were saying a second ago, being obsessed with that outcome can completely cloud your judgment and change the actual process. So if you're someone who's so focused on that number you're hitting that day when you go into the gym, it's going to completely throw you off. I've had that same experience several times when I go to the gym,

and I have so much pressure on myself for the performance that I feel like I need to put out that it ruins the training session. I find myself rushing through it. Like, I find myself moving through stuff so fast to get it done just so I can be like, I got to hurry up and get there so I can, like, get that performance out and then I'm done. Do you go into the gym, like, into your training, like, with a goal in mind, like, for each day? Or is it more just you just want to put the work in? Or is that how you is that was that how you were is that how you are it varies it varies you know it used to be different it used to be like

i'm just gonna go in and throw every single thing at it that i can and you know some days are like that and it's that simple and then some days when you know when you have tests coming up for example like if it's like a max out friday or something you your expectations are like through the roof and like and it's good to be nervous because that's where you set, you know, like. That's where adrenaline comes in. Yeah, I mean, you need that. But at the same time, like doing that all the time can really exhaust you and take a lot of the fun out of it.

And especially if you're someone who's not competing. Like if you're just someone who's training to be healthy and fit, like that's really bad. Yeah, focusing on the process like in the poem or the paragraph. Focusing on actually shooting. So focusing on the process of what you're doing. So maybe you're snatching or maybe you're squatting or whatever. And instead of focusing on maybe necessarily the end result,

but focusing on good movement pattern and the task, being completely present with what you're doing, just focusing on the task at hand instead of what's going on around it and what's going on around you. And I don't want people to think that, like, we're saying, like, don't try to, like, be good at something or don't try to be the best. Like, I feel like for me personally, like, I'm always going to try to be the best that I can be and do –

Be all that you can be. Exactly. And put 100% into it. However, the difference is is that that I know like what realism like realistic stuff is and what's achievable. And it's there's going to be days where it's just not going to the dominoes are not going to fall where they where they want. And so where you want. So like that is part of the process, like the struggle and, know the challenges that's what makes the end result whether if it comes tomorrow if it comes six months from now that's what makes the end result so much sweeter right and if you're only focused on that end result then it's going to just

completely drain you of of energy it's going to rob you of energy because you're you're none of you're not going to have enough energy to focus on you know just being present in your training like we had talked about in in another episode you know yeah kurt and i talked about that on the way here like um a lot of like i have a lot of clients and then days that i have specific weightlifting practice for them they go in and we have like some percentages they have to hit and like a lot of times i'll see video and they just like fail fail fail like i couldn't hit it today and i'm like well you got to recognize that and at least you might have to change on the fly like this is not a day where i'm chasing a number this is a day where i'm doing damage control and at least at least

change the mindset we're like you know what like the number's not there i'm not setting a record today so the best i can do is leave here a better weightlifter at least like like practice that movement to perfection and being okay with that because every day you go in is not going to be a day where you're trying to best your 1rm yeah for me and you've mentioned a couple times when we brought this topic up and preparing for this is is like what are you trying to prove and for me it's the difference in uh like when i was training to compete and where i had that shift because i did get into this phase where i just wasn't having fun it was the difference in doing it with internal motivation and it was all about you know this is what I want to go for for just

something I want to achieve and something I want to do and be the push to be the best that I can be versus when that shift happened where I wasn't having fun anymore it was because the pressure was all coming from external pressure that I was putting on myself nobody else was doing it but I thought I had to live up to the standard so I had to be this competitive athlete and I had to be hitting these numbers because everybody was expecting it so the motivation was coming from outside instead of just within this is what I want to do this is what my goals are going forward I'd say that's where I've I've been for quite some time now it's just you know there's a lot of pressure on the outside I feel like I have to live up to something and and man you don't every day in the gym you know you don't have those days every day

talking about dominoes stacking up in the gym they You know, you don't have those days every day. I'm talking about dominoes stacking up in the gym. They don't – you know, it's not there every day. So what do you – like how does it make you – like how does it affect you when you feel like all that pressure? Like what is it? I think it does. Tell me about your feelings. It takes – the fun has really been gone out of training for a while.

You know, I'll show up, go through the movements. And if I don't hit those percentages, I just – I feel less, you know, show up, go through the movements. And if I don't hit those percentages, I just, I feel less, you know? And unfortunately, uh, as a weightlifter, like that's, that's more often than not, you know, you're not going to hit all your percentages all the time, every day. Especially when you're only doing two lifts, right? Like, I mean, you're only, there's only so much you can do in your training. Like, I'm not saying like various types of the lifts, but like snatching, clean and jerk is really the only two in squad, are the goals that you're after, so it's not that much variance. So being the lone weightlifter in your gym, you're in the corner by yourself chasing these two numbers.

Yeah. You run into that same wall over and over again. Yeah, I feel like in that situation, having all that external pressure, it's just going to drive you crazy. And you build it up. Yeah, that's not really there. It's not real. And it's going to carry over into multiple aspects, you know, of your of your training, of your personal life, you know, your relationships with people. You know, like there's sometimes like I've known some people that they get so worked up because of so much pressure that they actually – so, like, they're preparing for a competition.

I have known people to, like, dodge out. Like, oh, they just drop out, like, you know, out of a competition, like, out of the, like, last minute because there's just so much pressure that they're just like, I can't do this. I can't do this. And they can. It's just they make that pressure on themselves, and it just ruins their chance for any kind of good experience. Or what about athletes that, you know, we'll use like the Open, for example,

that cheat scores? And I don't mean to cheat to, like, actually get to, like, regional or, like, to do better, but they almost cheat because they have an expectation in their head or they view themselves. They're trying to prove something. Right. They don't have the self-awareness, you know, maybe where their talent is that they can't accept the reality that that's like where

they stack up yeah right so that you see people cheat because of that or not even face it not even do it not even show up like they just completely bail out yeah and yeah so i mean like that's awful because you got to revisit why you're doing this again in the first place and a lot of that pressure is you know self-inflicted yeah like, like what do you – like you said, Michael, or like what do you have to prove? What is so important? Like think back, like what is the reason why you got involved in this in the first place?

Right, right. How can we get back to that? Yeah, how can you get back to that? Because that's what – when you first started, that's what made it fun and that's what made it exciting and you know when you lose sight of that then it just becomes you know like I don't know it just becomes terrible yeah I mean my experience came during the open when I went through this transition and kind of had to bounce back from it um and it was exactly that I completely lost the fun I wasn't doing it for what I was doing and I had gotten to this point where I was training with a coach that we just weren't meshing well together uh training was I was basically over training whether it was from

necessarily just the training or other stuff that was going on in my life too which also plays a factor in this um but everything was building up and I finally I just had a complete breakdown during the open yeah and I participated but like I threw a fit like my wife had never seen before and like only luckily only a few people were in the gym it was complete breakdown and basically I mean I had to go and like sit behind the building for a while and figure out like yeah okay this is exercise and like yeah this is just training and that's basically like what am i doing it's an identity crisis and you yeah like my identity is in in christ and it's not in this performance and that's where people get confused is they they put all their identity in this performance instead of something that's actual

confirmed and something that's concrete they get this temporary identity it doesn't define you yeah i can remember uh rich froning like, they had an interview with him, and he said something similar to you. Training in CrossFit does not define who he is. There are other things in his faith and his family and all this other stuff. That's who he is. And so, yeah, when he has defeat, it's not something that's going to – he's not going to go crazy about it.

Yeah, he's not going to go crazy about it. Because I've seen this happen before, like the tantrums and people just, you miss your lift and it's like you're 80%, you have a rough day and you're like, and you just blow up. Yeah, and you look like a two-year-old. You know, I kicked the box and like, stormed outside. Did you kick the chalk bucket?

I didn't have a chalk bucket. I kicked the box. You know what though, I'm going to bring the other side of that that so I believe that you kind of have to flirt with that line too if you're trying to chase greatness like in your head or if you're trying to reach the highest level so like um not saying it's good or bad but like where do you draw that line because I mean you know if you're chasing you know if you're if you're trying to make the crossfit games like you're gonna have to sacrifice some things and you're gonna have to be somewhat obsessed right yeah I'm not gonna say relationships are gonna be the best I'm not gonna say that you're gonna see have to sacrifice some things and you're going to have to be somewhat obsessed. I'm not going to say relationships are going to be the best. I'm not going to say that you're going to see your friends all the time. You know, a lot of people might look at that as sacrifice and obsession.

But to you, it's like, no, like this is what I'm after. Right. You know, but but then what? Like, so let's say you do get that. You know, we talked about that on another video, like that coming down from that. That's where people I see have a lot have a big problem with the adjustment. So they have that expectation now that everyone sees them as this high level athlete and then they have to kind of they feel like they have to live that for forever or you

know however many years they're still competing but what if you're just done like what if you don't want to do it anymore do you do you fall into that do you like you said like you had that expectation i had to keep putting this out in the open and man, it like destroyed you. Yeah. Yeah. So for, for me personally, I mean, like I said, my identity lies in Christ and my faith in Christ and he tells us to do everything we do for the glory of him. And if, if I'm doing everything that I can, like I'm doing it for Christ, then that means putting forth my full effort into anything I'm doing.

So whether it's work, whether it's my relationships, whether it's working out, I'm putting forth full effort for that reason, not for the outcome. Sounds like a more of an intrinsic motivator. Yeah, definitely. So it's the process. Yeah. So because I have that motivation, the higher motivation, I have to put forth full effort or else I'm doing him a disservice or, and that's what my intrinsic motivation comes from. So the result doesn't really matter. It's just that I'm doing him a disservice or and that's what my intrinsic motivation comes from so the result doesn't really matter it's just that I'm putting forth everything that I possibly can and that's where the fun is you're seeing what your body's capable of yeah what your limits are I'll share a personal experience um you know after having a couple of really good years in CrossFit coming back down has been really difficult and it's not that I'm quitting or

whatever it's just that the priorities have shifted and accepting that was really difficult because to me I feel like everyone sees like oh games athlete he's got to go do this and and like that's a lot of pressure and it actually did not allow me to enjoy competing anymore right like like the only time I wanted to compete is if I thought I was going to win right and and unfortunately like I always want to win and I'll never not want to win because i'm super competitive but you know i stopped competing because of that and it kind of ate me up so getting back to that has been a long process and i'm tough too because people put the pressure like i mean i myself have asked you know every time i see you it's your fault yeah it's my fault

but i mean every time you go to a gym or something people are going to ask you about when you're competing next when are you doing the grid next yeah yeah you know what i'm just gonna have to learn to politely say like i'm you know i'm probably not doing that right now yeah you know i may not be done competing it may come back but for right now that's not the focus right some of the hardest things that i did was uh or actually what's helped me get through it was i went to some training camps with people, some really high-level athletes. Actually going to them, I'm like, this is a training camp, but I was scared shitless because I'm like, I'm about to be exposed now. They're going to see where my level is now.

You know what? That's a reality I had to face, and it took so much pressure off, honestly. Now it's fun again, and I'm excited. I'm excited to do the Open. I don't care anymore. All that pressure is gone, and it was awesome so you say you said face reality what was that kind of reality that that you had to kind of come to terms with you know what I think I think maybe like it's you know uh people have their time and their phases as they go through it and and cross it's one of those things that it's like it's very short for a lot because people get better every year.

It's hard on the body. You know, life changes. You work more. You have more stressors. It's not always going to be the same. So maybe facing the reality that, you know, I'm just not at that level or maybe as fit as I was. And having to accept that has been was difficult I think too on top of that maybe because I've kind of had a similar experience that not only do you face the reality that you're not maybe not quite where you were or be able to hang with them but also you know what it takes to do that and my reality check was I don't I'm not in position to be willing to put forth that effort to be in that that's how I that's so that's the case then I have to give it up yeah that's how I you know felt better about it was like yeah I look back to when I was training like that, and I'm like, I just can't do that now.

Yeah, I don't want to do it anymore. So I'm like, well, it's not like I'm quitting. Like, I literally can't do that now. Now, I'm not saying this for all athletes. Like, there are some athletes out there, like the Jason Kalipas who have, like, six jobs and can go win the CrossFit Games every year. It's crazy, unbelievable, and, like, by all means,

like, keep doing that, but you've got to figure out what you can do personally, and that's all you can handle. You have to have clarity of what is And, like, by all means, like, keep doing that. But you've got to figure out what you can do personally, and that's all you can handle. You have to have clarity of what is and what you can do. Like, that has to be, you know, you have to have realistic expectations and realistic goals to where you are currently. Not where you were, but where you are. And that's, yeah. Developing that self-awareness, yeah.

I mean, all good athletes, that's that's yeah developing that self-awareness yeah so let's i mean all good athletes that's that's what any yeah but how do you lead an athlete to that place who maybe isn't realistic with themselves all the time or or has i think this could be applied to not just athletes but people who are just trying to get healthy and fit right you know when they want to be general really yeah when they want to be when they get to the gym and they started it for health and fitness and they just turn it into this competitive craziness. We talked about that on an episode. Is CrossFit becoming too competitive?

Nuggets and pearls, I think. Yeah. Overtime. So, I mean, it was just like – I mean, I don't even know where I was going with that. But bringing that point up, how do you talk someone kind of to chill out a little bit and to understand, like, look, this is where you are and, like, it's good to chase goals, but, like, you're not a professional athlete. Yeah.

I think a couple things is, one, trying to, like we mentioned earlier, is getting back to what your original reason for participating in whatever you're doing is, whether it's competing or whether it's just the classes or whatever your goal is, going back to that original reason of why, because usually that original reason of why was an internal reason. And then also looking at where you've come from. So people start getting down on their goals and whatnot. You know, we talked about that gap before in an episode

or a Nuggets and Pearls or something. But looking at where you are now versus where you've come and seeing that progress usually helps fuel that fire a little bit too. Yeah, I think as a coach too, you kind of have to – like this is the job of a coach. Yeah, this is coaching. If you think coaching is just programming and writing workouts, you are mistaken. You are a counselor to your clients.

And I think a lot of it, too, is sometimes you may have to dig a little bit deeper. And peel back the layers. Yeah, and figure out if they have so much going on, there may be something else that's going on, not even in the gym. Like maybe something on their personal life that's causing them to, you know, this is their outlet. And if they don't achieve, you know, greatness here, maybe they're not feeling like they're achieving what they want in their personal life or anything like that or something else is going on. So you might have to peel back the layers a little bit and dig yeah and it may be helping shift and we've mentioned uh shifting finding new goals yeah or new priorities new priorities so there comes a point when uh

one thing i want to add too is when you when you peel back something like that like my i feel like my need as a coach is not necessarily to help them through that if it's something that deeply personal but just to bring awareness to it because i don't like crossing those kind of lines like sometimes you need to go see a psychiatrist is what it comes down to like you need you need to talk you need to talk to somebody but you know you can only help so much as a coach so i think it's important the point being just to bring awareness to it so you realize like look it has nothing to do with the gym this is this is your home this is outside of it this is your life that you need to to adjust first yeah then everything else might fall back in line but yeah so so other than that you know what if you don't have a coach what if you know

you're training in the gym and you're unhappy at that gym or the the the program that you're on you're just unhappy with like what do you do you change goals you bail out yeah like how can you make that more fun so you talked talked about earlier, um, you've lost a lot of spark in the training because you're by yourself all the time. And we were just exploring ideas on what would help. So you got any experience with that? I mean, I think if it's, if it's an environmental thing, I mean, you got to look at changing the environment, you know, find some people that go out and seek out some people that you can train with or shift your, like I said, temporarily shift your goals to where you can get in with the class or something maybe you just say hey i'm not enjoying

being by myself doing just weightlifting or doing just uh maybe it's still still doing crossfit but individual design i'm just not having fun with it jump back into the class and have some fun with it um and then even if you have to shift completely gear shift gears completely like i've had to do because i because of my injury i can't do some of the things i've had to do so to be able to enjoy it i've had to shift gears and try to master something else some other kind of skill in my training that's new and and fun to try to achieve because i'm not super good at it yeah yeah there's been times when i've come in or maybe i've been hurt or uh didn't feel that strong and weightlifting, and I'm like, screw it, I'm going to go kill handstands today. Just find something to change the focus.

And maybe the focus shifts towards I'm going to go in and get as good a sweat as I can or I'm going to go in and work as hard as I can regardless of the score. And, you know, sometimes maybe running the problem that it's a workout you've done before and you know what your standard is on that. So that creates stress too. Like let's say you go in and do grace, and you're like, well, I know my grace time, so if I don't beat it, I'm like my day's ruined. You know your is on that. So that creates stress too. Like let's say you go in and do grace and you're like, well, I know my grace time. So if I don't beat it, I'm like,

my day's ruined. Right? Like, you know your time on that. So it's like, shit, if I don't beat this, it's,

it's ruined. It may not even be, change the way, change it up. It may just be like, I'm going to take a month and not take a time down at all. So I can't compare the score. I can't hear my reps.

Not, not every, not everything has to be your absolute PR best. It's not going to be eventually. Well, yeah, exactly. Like, you know, I was talking to some friends of mine, and, you know, she was getting ready to do a powerlifting meet, and she was putting all this, like, pressure on, like, this meet.

And it's just for practice. Like, to her, like she's super hyper competitive. Like she wants to like PR and, you know, set these records and stuff. But like, it's not, it's not like that important. Like just view it as practice, go have fun. And that's when, that's when you'll probably even do better. Like, uh, you know, Travis, Travis mash, he's, he's my weightlifting coach.

And, uh, when I was going Open, and I was really nervous because, you know, I just came back off an injury and I wasn't really performing that great. And, I mean, I was really, yeah, there was all this pressure I was putting on myself, you know, because I was about to do my shit on the stage, right? And so he was like, man, don't worry about it. Don't sweat it. Like, the people that have the most fun and just go out there and have fun, those are the people who end up who probably do well anyways.

So if you stress out and freak out about this, you're probably going to put yourself into a worse performance than you would just going out and just having fun and not really thinking too much on it. Right. I mean, Kalipa, you mentioned him earlier. He's a perfect example of that. I mean, you've been around him at the games.

He seems like he's having the most fun of anybody out there. That's how it should be. That's one of the reasons he keeps doing so well. If you compete or train, you should have just – I don't know how he does it. No, I have much respect for someone like that. I mean, it's easier said than done. We're just like, don't stress it, don't stress it.

But it's practiced. You're not going to all of a sudden listen to this episode and just be like, bang, I'm over it. This may be the stepping point that's going to help you get there. I think it's more that you just need that reminder. That's more – I mean, we all like – shit, man. I still do it sometimes, but you have to consciously remind yourself like, all right, look, just chill out. It's not that big of a deal.

Just go have fun. Well, that poem, look, just chill out. It's not that big of a deal. Just go have fun. And, you know. Well, that poem, it said it best. I mean, it summed up. It said, you know, doing the practice without any concern of the outcome. Right. You know, and that's so powerful. That could be translated actually into so many things really.

Like doing it just to do it and remember that it's about the learning experience. That's what's fun. I mean, honestly, you're being present in it in it you know like not to get too philosophical but like you are being present in the movements that you're doing at that time and like to remember that and it takes a lot of the pressure away so i mean what are some what's some advice you can give to someone who who might be stuck here right now like what are some steps you can take like for me i always tell people like go create your own version of what it is to you exactly to be healthy yeah like like write it down take some time really think about it don't rush through it yeah like try not to focus on numbers think long term like what is it exactly that's that's healthy to you

and you can create your own version of that that's really fun anything you've done with clients i mean it's such a kind of a cliche thing now to to start with why i like the book but i mean that's really what i try to get them to do is go back and figure out you know why are you doing this why are you coming to the gym why uh is it important to snatch and clean and jerk x or why is it important to hit a two minute time on grace or why why what's your motivation why are you doing this and if you can get grounded in that then nothing else is gonna matter near as much and reminded them like we alluded to earlier it's just working out to earlier, it's just working out.

In the end, it's just working out. It's not. It's life or death. Okay? It is exercise. It's exercise. I mean, so I would remind him of that. Anything you've used?

I mean, basically what's kind of used. I mean, for me, I just feel like, you know, I have I said, you know, one one big goal, you know, and that's that's more what I focus on. And it's a very it's a thought out goal. You know, it's not something like, you know, whatever it's it's you know, I want to do this or do this. And then and then, you know, I'm not stressing about, you know, the individual failures in between as long as I between as long as I'm progressing towards that. So even though I may fail one day, I know that I'm putting in the work to progress towards that. So you've got to remind yourself, too, as long as you're putting in the work and you're doing it consistently, you will get there. It may just not be tomorrow or it may not be when you want it to be, but you will get there at some point. Mention that we're going to have that full depth where um we talk about my journey to to reno which is one american

open which is one of my big goals oh cool man cool, man. Awesome. I'll check that out. It'll be on there. Yeah, so what about, you know, the group aspect of it? So community is, like, super important to me, regardless of how fancy and individualized the program is for you. Sometimes you're just not happy doing it because, like Kurt said, like you're on your own. So, you know, or what if that community isn't for you?

What do you do? Do you switch gyms? You've got to surround yourself with good people yeah regardless i mean like you know like we always say like you're the average of five people that you hang out with you know like you want to surround yourself with positive people who like your tribe you know like they're they're on the same wavelength as you you know they're not they're not trying to bring you down they're trying to uplift so like that's i mean you have to i think if you're in a gym with a group of people that isn't supporting what you're doing you know and that

doesn't mean they're wrong necessarily just means that's probably not for you but like you got to recognize that and move on don't keep trying to fight it don't keep trying to to make it fit right your cheese moved right well and it doesn't have to be necessarily a local community. It can be a bigger community. Right. Right. Like for me with, you know, a business relationships and even training relationships like my community goes outside of my gym. Yeah. Because not everybody sees out on different things. So it may not be it may just be communicating through text messages constantly. We're connecting with people on forums or online, on Facebook, and things like that.

Like, you know, like finding some kind of community. So, like, especially, you know, if you have a home gym, like you don't have a, you know, physical present, like, community, but you can have one, you know, outside of that through, you know, online. Yeah, I love it. The Barbell Shredding Group is a great example. So a lot of these guys, like, are like garage jimmers, you know. A lot of them just do their own workout in the corner. Some of them at Globo Gyms.

And they all start the program at different times. And these guys have an extremely tight-knit community. They're in there every day helping each other out. And, like, it's because they all are heading on that same path. They're all moving in the same direction together. Like, it's perfect. It worked out great. Yeah.

Yeah. they're all moving the same direction together like it's perfect it worked out great yeah yeah yeah i think i think having somebody to to you know be with you on that is very crucial to to having fun in your training because i mean even still like all right so like yeah i mean you can still have somebody like oh yeah i one-upped you on that one like on the other day like what you got like you know i mean that still makes it fun you you know? And as long as it's, like, a cool competitive type, yeah, like, not like, bro, like, you know, like, always kind of just in your face. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen people literally mad at someone,

hate them because they beat them in a workout. And it's like, what is with that? I don't know. It's crazy. It's like, oh, you ever seen this one meme, Nike weightlifting, hilarious, right, on Instagram. And it's like like oh you ever seen this one i've seen this one meme uh nike weightlifting hilarious right on instagram and it's like when you see somebody warming up with your one rep max and you give them like the stank eye like what the like why are you why are you mad

like i mean it goes back to that what do you have to prove or what are you trying to prove like it's probably because you know like oh yeah you're like the biggest and the baddest in your neck of the woods but then somebody else comes along but i think that's a good, you know, like, oh, yeah, you're, like, the biggest and the baddest in your neck of the woods. But then somebody else comes along. But I think that's a good reminder, you know? Like, that's like, oh. Always being humbled. Yeah. I think being humbled also makes it fun, too.

That's the beauty of CrossFit. Yeah. Like, you are humbled daily. I love it. Yeah. I mean, same thing with weightlifting. Like, you see people, you thought, oh, shit, like, damn. Like, I just got blown away.

The open is a humbling experience yeah and i'm not i think that's another reason why people like to do the open because it is it is a very challenging and a humbling experience and you realize like man like you know i've i've come a long way but i still got a long way to go i think the open could be far more enjoyable if you remove the expectation oh yeah so if you are just so concerned with that placement because honestly if you're if you're gonna chase that you're never gonna be happy with it because like i've said before i've said 100 times like there's only one winner right and i mean it changes every year so it's like you know yeah you just you gotta target yeah

it's a moving target and you just have to have fun with it and treat it like that like what you said it can be a blast yeah before the internet where was everyone a local meat legend probably yeah probably yeah before instagram before instagram everybody was probably like the biggest i'm so awesome yeah yeah yeah that's pretty funny so i mean internet ruined everybody yeah oh yeah that that that's another thing too here i'm gonna talk about i'm gonna talk about this right now because because yes in the internet has ruined a lot of stuff and you just see all this stuff on the internet and it's like you don't compare don't try to compare yourself so hard to that like only pr yeah to only prs people only post PRs online. Like, they're not going to post – like, very rarely people post failures.

So, like, you're not seeing, like, the 90% of the time, you know, that it is. So, like, I would say if you want to have fun, like, maybe just stay off the internet or just realize that that's what that is. I've seen a lot of athletes do that. They remove the Instagram account, like, coming up to competition. They don't want to know what the other athletes are doing. Really? I did not – really yeah i would totally

i would i would straight up see what that makes total i mean if you hit a pr snatch that day and you go online you see two or three other people do it oh yeah like i've done too i've been like i trained with this one it's not as cool anymore yeah yeah but if you'd never seen it imagine how high you still would have felt after that i trained with this one girl and she's like yeah i snatched this or i clean and jerk this and then i went on instagram and i saw three other girls do it i'm like i compete against them and she's like freaking herself out i'm like ah yeah like like don't worry about that don't worry about that you know so we touched on uh you know if you run into the issue where you've lost the fun in training,

we gave you some ideas on, you know, how to really peel back the layers and figure out why that fun is gone. Some suggestions on. The thrill is gone. Yeah. Is it community? Is it maybe you're setting unrealistic expectations? Maybe you're not very self-aware.

Maybe it's time to move on to a new goal you know there's nothing wrong with that some people especially like a specific sport like weight lifting or crossfit like like if they're just lost if they've lost that passion for that even though the ties of community are so strong they're so scared to let go of that like you got to recognize that like move on it's okay and if you want to come back you come back no big deal i think for the intro for the show, we should sing that song, You've Lost That Love and Feeling from Top Gun. That's what we should do, right?

How's it go? It's like, you've lost that love. No, I'm kidding. I didn't know you could do it. I can't believe you did it. I mean, anybody who watched Top Gun, you know that shit. I don't know that song. McElroy, God.

All right. We need to make a list. I don't even know that song. Oh, you know that song. don't know that song mackroy god all right we need to make a list i even know that song oh you know that's okay we need to make a list of all the movie references and movies that mackroy just gonna sit you in a room one day all of them watch it i thought you're gonna say the movies he hasn't seen yeah yeah yeah well yeah yeah we'll just do it let's we'll do the top 10 most important films i want to ask the fans what are the top 10 most important films mackroy needs to see yeah all right so with that said um gave you some ideas as well on what steps to take to maybe try and resolve this go talk to a

coach um you know switch gyms switch communities find a new program change your goals um sit down and write down you know your idea of what fitness is like what health is to you and figure out if those things go in line with the path that you want to head toward yeah anything else you guys want to add no i just think that that that self-assessment first before you before you start changing a lot of stuff because you know we always like you know don't change don't yeah that's a good point don't switch it up like too quick follow the program follow the path but like don't blame an outside source right don't don't yeah it's not look inside first before you start trying to look outside and then if it's not Look inside first Before you start

Trying to look outside And then if it's something On the inside That's jacked up Then that's what you need To address Outside stuff Is not gonna change

Right So always look Try to say Always look inside first Time I guess that's time Done Alright

Thanks for listening Thanks This week on Barbell Shrug we talk about how to stop obsessing and start enjoying your training