Barbell Shrugged - The Bledsoe Show #128

Starting point is 00:00:00 Today, we get to hang out with Guy Ferdman, a teacher and friend of mine for a number of years. He connects dots for people and helps them see things they couldn't see for themselves. I'm excited to bring this conversation to you. This week, we open our doors for registration for the first round of athletes into the Enlifted Athlete Coaching Program. This is the program that would have made me a much better athlete and saved me a lot of stress and injury. This is the foundation that would have made me a much better athlete and saved me a lot of stress and injury.

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Starting point is 00:01:35 You have to take action. You have to break the habit of doing the things the way you always have to become someone new. The person who takes on challenge instead of shying away from it. Ordinary people are always talking about change but don't take action. These are the people I avoid. I can smell it and it stinks. Don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with being ordinary. It's just not for me. I'm committed to an extraordinary life and I expect those who I work and socialize with to do the same. Extraordinary people take bold action. They make bold statements and they follow through. They put their money where their mouth is. If you're ready to take bold action, that which most people will make excuses, go to thestrongcoach.com to get three days of exercises that will transform your coaching business when you put them in place.

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Starting point is 00:02:59 Go to thestrongcoach.com to make your move. And we have an event coming up. June 15 in Venice, California at the Human Garage. We are hosting a breath and ice seminar with the most impressive technician I've ever sat with. It's a shamanic experience. Brandon Powell is a master level musician, breathwork instructor, and black belt in jujitsu. He trains directly with Wim Hof and has brought a lot of stuff into that community that has leveled them up. He's an amazing athlete and he uses breath to make

Starting point is 00:03:32 athletes better. He trains a lot of the other black belts in jiu-jitsu to help them with their game through breath. He has been a major influence in the jiu-jitsu community and in the breath community. So I'm really excited to bring them to you. Make sure you're on the Enlifted newsletter list so you can get access as soon as we open registration. We're only taking 20 spots for this event and the seats will go fast. Now for our sponsors. Have you tried Organifi yet? The best tasting green drink on the market. Are you eating enough greens to support the recovery of your body from day to day and week to week? I know I have a hard time getting

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Starting point is 00:04:43 which is the sunlight and sauna at my house. And I've got to say of my new favorite tools in my toolkit, which is the Sunlighten sauna at my house. And I've got to say, what a pleasure. I enjoy having friends over for a nice sweat as we listen to music. The infrared sauna is different than your typical sauna. There's a whole list of health and performance benefits you receive while relaxing and sweating. From improving your cardiovascular system to reducing the time to recover from your last workout or long day at work. Head over to sunlighten.com and use the code SHRUGCOLLECTIVE to save $200 and get free shipping. Now for our show with Guy Ferdman. Enjoy.

Starting point is 00:05:24 Extra good behavior. Hey, Katie. It's good to see you. It's been a minute. All right. I see my sets. You have so many plants and smart people. We'll see.

Starting point is 00:05:41 We'll see who's smarter, the plants or the people. I'm sure it's the plants. the people insurance the plants all right what's up dude been a minute it's been a while we we uh our last show was uh a year and a half maybe two years no about a year and a half i think about a year ago i think pre pre-pregnancy. Pre-pregnancy. Yeah, how's life after children? Life after children. Well, I'll say more like life during child. Sorry, my phone, of course, is going off when it's not supposed to be. You know what? Amazing.

Starting point is 00:06:18 I knew I was cut out to be a dad. I didn't expect to enjoy it quite as much as I do. Having a child is a very interesting experience. A lot in the beginning, I think, for how it reprograms your view of the world. I feel like a lot of the things that I was dealing with or that had focus in my life, it rearranges priorities. So the first thing you notice is that a lot of things that seem like they were priority suddenly get muted. And then you wonder why you were thinking about those things,

Starting point is 00:06:54 why they were ever a concern. And it seems almost humorous that other people are dealing with them at all. Yeah, no, it's really, really funny. There's probably some parents looking at me and going, this guy. Yeah. Well, I guess that goes for any experience, right? Let's say you talk to somebody who's never

Starting point is 00:07:12 had a drink or experienced being drunk or who's never done ayahuasca, right? It's like there's certain things that before you did ayahuasca seemed like a really big deal. You had to deal with them and suddenly it's like, oh oh that isn't really a serious thing at all i can't believe i was putting so much of my energy into trying to figure that out or handle it it's like oh it just kind of handled itself and you did a ton of you've been in personal development your whole adult life that's 17 years now yeah yeah and so i imagine that over time you're refining your priorities you had a lot of experiences that made you have, you know, you're talking about referring to ayahuasca. It's like, oh, you've never done that.

Starting point is 00:07:50 And afterwards, priorities get rearranged. So having a child rearranged it further. For sure. What are some things that you were surprised to get rearranged? Well, you know, not bad or wrong, right, about whether you had it or not. It's funny because when I was in my 20s, my peer group, I was living in New York and my entire peer group was getting married and have kids. So like one of the, one of the reasons, one of many, I moved to San Diego for was suddenly the conversation stopped being interesting because

Starting point is 00:08:17 all my friends just talked about children all the time. And I was not even with like the person I was going to have a child with so i'm like all my friends who used to go out and hang out and we'd have all these interesting conversations suddenly it's like what size diaper is the child wearing and you know that's not interesting when you don't have a child so um but then i i would have this experience that people who had children i don't want to say they talk down to you but it's like i know something that you don't and the reality is it's like every experience you do because you're having that experience right um so with children you know the first thing i noticed is uh the moment um

Starting point is 00:08:48 mandy my wife got pregnant um everything that's i becomes we so it's like the moment you find out you're pregnant and that reality hits you could just feel your entire brain just i think that's where the like the awe and the shock of it comes from because your brain is like it can't handle what's happening it's just a whole reinterpretation of life suddenly you're like wow this thing is really not about me i've heard i've had many friends that have children they go you just don't know you just don't know um and and the thing is it's like you do know you know the some of the information much of which even like now uh post-pregnancy postpartum i'm shocked at how little information is out there

Starting point is 00:09:25 that's usable because of how the hardship that the mother goes through physically during the pregnancy, after the pregnancy, you just can't be prepared for these things. And our medical industry is nowhere near adequate in their education for this type of stuff, at least in my personal opinion. So we've had to deep dive into all these things

Starting point is 00:09:45 which is amazing by the way because i think about like our parents no google like your child's crying at home not the cry that you're used to having something that you see and you have no resource to ask your only resource is let's go to the er let's call up the doctor and then even then it's like are you really getting the holistic perspective are you getting this like one person's perspective on this very thing? So I'm like, wow, like people were raising children with no information about development, illnesses, anything else, which is pretty wild. But to go back to like your question, I think it's like a few things that are radically

Starting point is 00:10:19 changed. Yes, a different type of love that is a selfless type of thing. And that is growing day by day like i'm i'm regularly i wake up in the morning and how i feel about my son like surprises me and i'm like wow it's more than yesterday it's more than yesterday um and that keeps growing because the personality is there you start seeing um how many things we come with that aren't nature or nurture. It's like this is just the skills this child comes with,

Starting point is 00:10:48 and then there's the nature and nurture aspect that starts coming online also. And the other part is the fear, both sides, how much love and how much fear. Because the first time you see your child in pain, and whether it's caused by another person or whether you had to make a decision that causes that child pain, that's something I never experienced before. It's like a different threshold. Yeah. Knowing as much about human development.

Starting point is 00:11:12 I mean, when I think about what you do, what I've gotten into is really it's studying human development. So knowing as much as you do, you've been studying it for 17 years. Yeah. And knowing as much as you do, you've been studying it for 17 years. How's that? How's it watching your kid knowing like, oh, I mean, you're obviously going to do a better job than most people because of that. Better job is the right word. I'm more aware while they're going through it. Yeah. Do you freak out?

Starting point is 00:11:41 You're like, oh, man, I just set this kid up to have this weird trauma and now he's gonna have to see a psychologist or something or maybe actually i think the opposite side of that because um because i'm aware of the way human development works like these days way more than even two years ago um at the energetic level i understand what pattern and what's important for the child that any given pattern now i think every parent is going to fuck up their child and the reason for that is because the child doesn't come with a manual so you don't really know how to truly fulfill on the needs that this child has so i'll give you an example um like right now where he's at right so uh from an esoteric point of view like

Starting point is 00:12:22 the soul hasn't really embodied this temple, so to speak, where it kind of like pops in and out. If you were like journey of souls, they do a very good job of outlining how this works. But the whole point is that the soul is trying to figure out right now, is this body safe? Is it safe to be in this world in this body?

Starting point is 00:12:38 So the number one thing is like safety. So some, some parents will tell you, let the baby cry it out. Other people will tell you, pick it up all the time. And I think there's a happy medium between those two two but the number one thing we focus on is like is this child feeling safe and you have to get that a child's nervous system is not fully developed

Starting point is 00:12:52 it doesn't know how to self-soothe the energy doesn't move through so if the baby's freaking out you better be there to pick it up and help it move the energy through because that will um create a pattern so right now the child is basically looking at this world and saying, do I feel safe? And am I nourished? That's it. So if you're even breastfeeding, let's say, and the mom's underproducing breast milk and the child's attempting to eat, but feels internally in its energetic system that it's just not getting enough, that's already starting to create some kind of developmental, I don't want to call it deficiency but like a hole in their uh patterns and that's what's called like a lever pattern these are people who at the first sign of like overwhelm

Starting point is 00:13:33 stress whatever instead of staying here will literally like leave and like go back to spirit almost these are uh generally people have like a good relationship with god the ethereal very creative like that kind of stuff and that's just from nourishment. All right. So tell me as a parent, like, how do you handle that? You know, how do you know the kids not, you know, saying that. And in the beginning, I don't think our child was being nourished enough because of, um, he was tongue tied and we actually had to get, uh, that surgically altered for him. I remember I was at your house and you were talking about getting a procedure done. And then I was talking to somebody else and they said, Oh yeah, Jaden had to have that done. I was at your house and you were talking about getting a procedure done. And then I was talking to somebody else and they said, oh yeah, Jaden had to have that done. I was like, no, it was Guy,

Starting point is 00:14:11 not Jaden. Yeah, we both did it. So, I mean, to speak to that. So, this is funny, right? So, tongue tied means that the lower part of your tongue is just really far forward. So, your tongue doesn't have a lot of travel, doesn't move out very much. So my tongue was like really developed on the outside of the muscles, but I had actually never used the center of my tongue. Like little known to me, I was just like compensating. And I went to see this really amazing doctor and he had asked me a few questions about my like emotional wellbeing and my emotional experience of the world. And he said, do you get upset about, you know, he lays out all these things. I said, yes, all the world and he said do you get upset about you know he lays out all these things i said yes all the time he said do you feel like this in your system and he he kind of uh showed me that down the center it feels like i'm rattling like this i said it does feel

Starting point is 00:14:55 like that he goes you look very composed on the outside but inside you're rattling i said pretty much um having known you for 15 i've known you for two and a half years like that's been i remember that doesn't surprise me because i it's like you you've talked about like like there's like something inside that's that just was always like there's some type of discomfort or fear or something yeah it was like it was a concept like pulling out my heart but it's like my nervous system couldn't be at rest so he explained to me he said well when your tongue is like this it's like a muscle that's always contracted so if you're like if you constantly contract any muscle like what what's your muscle doing right you're like shaking like this he goes

Starting point is 00:15:36 your nervous system is doing that because it hasn't been able to rest and i asked him what are some other side effects and everything he mentioned was like me to a T. So again, and I have some of these patterns in my life also. So it just made a lot of sense. And when I went to go get the consult with these doctors, again, I like mentioned this, I'm not concerned about the physicality of it. That has never thwarted me, but like speech impediments, stuff like that. And I was in speech pathology for like four years when I was younger, a lot of things, but it's really where my tongue was at rest in my mouth that hit me really hard. And I'm like, wow, I'm never resting. This is insane.

Starting point is 00:16:11 And it's been like this since I was born. Yeah, this is something I've got wind of since, well, over the years, seeing different types of therapists. And coming to the conclusion at one point, it's like, oh, my jaw is off you know i've got more tension in the right side of my body than the left side body because of i'm carrying tension in my jaw and and that connects at the the c7 c6 c7 vertebrae and and then i'm like oh it's no wonder my right shoulder kept getting injured no wonder my you know my whole right side my right hamstring is short, you know. And I kept on trying to stretch and stretch and stretch. Doesn't help.

Starting point is 00:16:50 Doesn't fucking help. And I got a jaw release and I got, yeah, instant relief. And I go, oh my gosh, I started walking differently. My shoulders stopped popping. I went and worked out that day and it felt smooth and easy. And I was, I was blown away by it. And then it started coming back. That's right. Coming back. And I then, I went and saw one of the check guys, uh, Alex Ripshinsky and, uh, he, we were the most, uh, the most in-depth

Starting point is 00:17:25 physical assessment I've ever received. We measured everything. Instruments I'd never seen before we were using. And he was like, well, yeah, your jaw's definitely, you know, it went back. And I go, you know, why is that? He's like, well, your teeth are shaped in that direction. That's right.

Starting point is 00:17:44 It's like you have a are shaped in that direction that's right yeah so every time it's like you have a lifetime of being right jaw dominant and your teeth are shaped that way so every time you bite down it's just it's just reinforcing that old pattern he's like you're gonna have to get your teeth adjusted that's right and he's like i could release your jaw but it'll just give you a temporary relief and i'm like what the fuck so um you know I've been I've been looking at my physical body and going one by one and going what's the most what's the priority right now yes so the priority hasn't been to fix my teeth yet but at some point I'll get my teeth adjusted you know I had braces when I was a teen I'll I'll uh I'll have to do something like that again, probably not as aggressive in my late 30s just so I can feel good in my entire body.

Starting point is 00:18:32 So this is a really interesting thing and funny. So the phone that rang when we first got here, that was that doctor, the one that told me about the tongue-tied out of all people um and this is so like so i think what you're talking about here is uh we're all uh seeking to get back into alignment right so you got aligned in the jaw and then suddenly there's this different effect on the body because everything is tied to everything else so for me now it's like physical alignment yep energetic alignment yep emotional alignment yep and that's why if you really tackle your mental alignment if you if you tackle any one of these and your whole focus is just one area. And for me, it was on the mental for a long time. It's like, let's figure out the psychology. Let's figure out why people are doing what they're doing to themselves. Why are they unmotivated? Why are

Starting point is 00:19:14 they procrastinating? Why don't, why are they so fearful? Why are they telling themselves these stories? And I, and I tackled everything from there. And at that time, that seemed like the most important thing. And I think for the, of humanity, to just tackle that is major, would significantly alter the quality of people's lives. It does, but also probably create a new planet. Now I see, though, I did that type of work for 10, 12 years pretty intensively. And what I felt inside, the frustration that was always kind of there is I've gained all this awareness. And yet at the core of me, I don't quite feel different. Like that, that sensationalized

Starting point is 00:19:53 fear is still there. Um, I'm still compensating. I could see when I go out in public sometimes and I'm feeling overwhelmed. I'm responding in ways that are maybe out of character for me or that I wish were different, stuff like that. And I'm like, this is still weird. So the last like five years has been more investigation of like other alignments. So funny enough, you mentioned teeth. I've gotten my teeth flattened, but now there's all this research coming out on fillings, root canals. Your teeth are all intertwined to the meridians of the body.

Starting point is 00:20:19 So it's like you get a tooth extracted in a root canal. I don't even know what kind of damage you're doing to other parts of the body. This is stuff like nobody ever considered before. Because when you're a specialist, your whole life is about looking at everything through that keyhole. And you don't consider the integral nature of the entire human body. So now when I go to see doctors, if they don't take everything into consideration, including my energy systems, I actually don't want to work with you. So for me, your your um you know your western type of doctor i think is fantastic for trauma care like if i get hit by a car i don't

Starting point is 00:20:51 want to go see a holistic doctor right like i want to go to the emergency room and see the medical my wife had a complication with pregnancy we ended up in the er and i'm so grateful for western medicine because i don't know if she would be here without that um but we also did a natural home birth and i got to see that. And I know what going to a doctor takes away from a woman today also. Since there were complications, were you glad that you did it at home? I am. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:21:14 And we wouldn't have changed that. We'll do that again. Okay. Yeah. Because the complication that happened would have happened whether we were home or in emergency care. We also took into consideration we're one exit away from the hospital you want to go to and anyway she lost two liters of blood within a five minute drive

Starting point is 00:21:30 to the hospital and basically almost died and without a transfusion and doctors helping her um you know i potentially could not have had a wife on the day that my son was born so that was a pretty scary thing um very scary actually uh so yeah we got to see the best of both but like i don't want to go into the whole science of why natural birth is so important for a human baby um and we can if you want to explore that but um you know again like i i everything has a place in this world i think right now where we are in evolution and how humanity is working it's like we've grown in all these really beautiful verticals of speciality that really are amazing and are changing people's lives but the the lack of integration between all these fields right like uh cancer research for instance yes there's the

Starting point is 00:22:16 western methodology but um you know pumping people full of the things that they're pumping people full of like it's crazy it doesn't work for most people and it doesn't uh it has a cellular breakdown and gives you so many other problems then you have like all these holistic people healing it i'm not saying one is more right than the other but if there was an integration between all these different things we'd probably get to uh you know a cure much faster and i kind of see that in every aspect, whether it's religion or health or anything else today. Yeah. Yeah. It's about energy systems. My audience is likely very familiar with like metabolic energy systems.

Starting point is 00:22:57 Can you talk about energy systems the way you're talking about it? Sure. So there are, in very simplistic terms, let's say five ways that a human develops between zero and seven years old. The first one I kind of mentioned, this is what's called like the oral stage, everything in the mouth, right? Nutrition. After this, it's so we can basically go from like embodied to how we take things in, how we put things out. What do you mean by embodied so embodied uh so somebody who would have like a hole in that part of the developmental process it's like they haven't owned their own body right so people who tend to have very frail bodies so zero to seven is like

Starting point is 00:23:36 the the oral stage i'm no i'm sorry like zero to seven is like the entire human let's say the entire human developmental cycle this oral stage is usually like zero to six months old from there you're like six to eighteen months old um so there's like these five stages let's say the entire human developmental cycle. This oral stage is usually like zero to six months old. From there, you're like six to 18 months old. So there's like these five stages. Let's just keep it at that and keep it really, really simple. So depending on that system, let's say the first system, okay, that belief structure will create certain collapses in the body system. The easiest way to think about it is what's happening in your stomach, what's happening in your heart, what's happening in your mind. And there might be collapses or you might feel sensations like a tightness.

Starting point is 00:24:08 So you know like when people are very afraid, where does that occur? It's in the stomach, right? It's like this tightening that happens in the stomach or like the butterflies things that people talk about. You're getting some kind of collapse in the energetic system over there and your body in order to protect itself

Starting point is 00:24:24 is creating this collapse. Now, again, that's like a muscle that's tightening. If I'm trying to move something through my hand, but my hand is tight like this, the energy has nowhere to go. And I've understood it as the fascia. Yes. Is what is, it's winding.

Starting point is 00:24:41 Yes. And then if it stays wound long enough, it gets stuck. It stays that way. Yeah. So you can think enough it gets stuck it stays that way yeah so you could think of it so it's a it all works together i would say the skeletal system as well the muscular system and the fascia for sure um basically as this energy sticks let's say even if the energy is here the energy is trying to resolve and metabolize but your system is not allowing for that because of whatever this contraction might be and like you said yes the energy starts moving in a particular way just like your jaw It's just like repetitive thing.

Starting point is 00:25:08 And something that initially was a survival strategy, ultimately becomes a survival pattern. And that's what goes into your subconscious and starts playing like a broken record, really without any input from you whatsoever. So you can think of the body as like creating an armor, right? Of some kind. So like for me and you, like of the body as like creating an armor right of some kind um so like for me and you like we run what's called like an aggressive pattern this actually happens like later on in developmental structure and i'm and i'm taking a guess um so like when you see people with like the v body shape uh big chest broad shoulders if you think about what's happening is something wasn't safe you start feeling very alone in the world and you want to protect what's

Starting point is 00:25:44 important to you right so what's important to you is your heart because like it alone in the world and you want to protect what's important to you right so what's important to you is your heart because like it seems like the world's a threat so the armoring like where the energy is pulled the energy is pulled up and actually gets stagnant here and creates armoring up here right because what am i trying to do if i have a bigger thing i'm trying to protect my heart yeah essentially and this is also this is impacting your mind and that you're you're going that that might be why you're drawn to a certain type of training yes like i want to train to be like this i gotta protect myself i need to look like this i need to i need to put more mass here

Starting point is 00:26:16 yeah exactly right so you know for for me and this was this was like a revelation like two years ago i read this book it had mentioned some of these things and i was like a revelation like two years ago. I read this book. It had mentioned some of these things. And I was like, oh, that kind of makes sense. Five personality patterns. And I like never considered that when I was walking out into the world, I was constantly under threat. I was actually scared all the time. So, when I would walk across the street and I would see people coming at me that my body was responding to as a threat, that I would get a little bit bigger, right? Like my shoulders would come up and like this. And when I read that book, I was actually in France walking down the

Starting point is 00:26:50 streets of Nice by myself. And I'm like, there's nothing very threatening in Nice. These are like the richest people in the world. But I felt threatened. And these two guys were walking towards me and I must have puffed up. And my system must have told them that I'm a threat, which is what I want. Because if I'm under threat, I got to threaten. This is like the classic bully, right? It's not that they want to threaten everybody. They're scared of everybody.

Starting point is 00:27:11 So they're threatening everybody to try to make themselves feel safe. And I see these two guys cross the street. And I hear this little voice in my head go, good. And I had never heard that voice before. I never heard that protector before. And I'm like, what good? And it hit me really hard that I'm trying to scare people in an effort to make myself feel safe.

Starting point is 00:27:31 So look, for everybody, this kind of works this way. Some patterns, they're here for enduring, right? So if you're like a heavier set person, you find it very, very difficult to lose weight. Guess why that is? You're in this pattern that's called enduring. And when you're in an enduring pattern, your body actually builds like a thickness because what you're trying to do is protect

Starting point is 00:27:49 yourself from the world this happens with women who are rape victims a lot of times they like add weight to their bodies again this is all subconscious stuff that we do and the body's trying to protect and create an armor for you so now here you are going i want to lose weight and you're scaring the fuck out of your system because as you drop the weight the system responds with stress and overwhelm and when you're stressed and overwhelmed and you're in a dirt pattern what do you do you reach for food yeah so you start eating again and then you go I don't know why I can't lose this weight so until you would resolve the part of the system that's holding on to the energy and this patterning for you it's going to be very difficult to lose

Starting point is 00:28:22 weight and we see this with like uh the, right? They lose weight, boom, right back. Right back on. Because the patterning hasn't changed. The physical alignment is there, but the energetic alignment's gone. So what I found a few years ago, I lost 25 pounds very rapidly. And it was just because I was resolving things in my energy system. I didn't change anything about my fitness routine, my health routine, my eating routine. And gradually, things were shifting anyway, like how I looked at food or how I approached my routine. Because I had a very similar experience because I was just several years. Yeah. Yeah. The last three, four years I've been, I've dropped 30 pounds, 35 pounds. Significant. And it wasn't on purpose. I wasn't trying. And, uh, trying. But I was viewing the world differently.

Starting point is 00:29:07 And I would say I feel way less threatened now than I did then. Back then it was me against the world. I would say your typical meathead, Jim Jock, is probably dealing with this kind of patterning. And it's like that built-up body gives us a sense of confidence that we can like handle all sorts of kind of threats that are happening um but again the truth is like yeah maybe that's true in the physical world but like energetically nothing's changed and inside you're basically like a scared little boy who is just trying to get his needs met and you're trying to get it met in ways that will never meet those needs so then you live your whole life in basically a fight-or-flight response yeah what are some other patterns that you said? Aggressive, enduring?

Starting point is 00:29:46 Yeah. So you'll have aggressive, enduring, rigid. These are like a rule-based people. You break a rule, they like lose their fucking minds. The first one I mentioned is a lever pattern. So again, these people are typically like dancers, creative types, usually like frail frames. And again, because they haven't embodied themselves. Like they're not in their bodies. They're scared to be here. So they're like the squirrel that's running around the top of the trees and it wants to get on the ground.

Starting point is 00:30:12 It wants to see what's hanging out over there, but it's like everywhere it looks, there's a dog, there's a car, there's humans, everything scares it. I had one of our retreats recently. We were working with a girl, very thin, dancer, was very much into even embodiment yeah and then trying to resolve that and then by the end of the retreat she goes

Starting point is 00:30:31 i hadn't been in my body the whole time that's right and yet that was that was part of she goes oh now i'm in my body this feels different and uh yeah it and that was the person who you would assume that person's in their body. Yes. So again, right? Because how people show up is the overcompensation of what they're trying to hide internally. And the last one is like a merging pattern, which is like people, again, who haven't been able to meet their needs. So they try to meet their needs through other people. When that doesn't work, there's what's called a merger compensated. And that's like the archetypal mother, the one that puts everybody, their needs in in front of their own and they keep thinking

Starting point is 00:31:10 that if i just help everybody and i get their needs met then i'll finally get to myself and they they've already gotten to a point where they've systematically completely abandoned their own needs in fact they stop even thinking that they have any um and they just live in this state of like kind of a regret and pain that they're never quite getting the connection that they're looking for yeah so those are like the pretty five big ones yeah and then you know what's really important too like if there's two things i would study is uh attachment styles i think are crucial uh i think most of uh the world probably 80 80 of action is taken from pattern uh some of those i talked about and different attachment styles all right so you so that what you covered was embodiment there

Starting point is 00:31:51 what was so we're talking about human development yeah so you have oral embodiment yeah and then uh you have so you're basically uh oral embodiment um then it's like uh meeting my needs like learning to meet my own needs, um, putting things out, putting things in, um, putting things out is like, like self-expression. Um, how, how am I seen in the world? How has that received? Um, so like an endurer pattern is like somebody who keeps trying to get acknowledgement for something and the parents are just like, they just don't give a shit,

Starting point is 00:32:25 you know, or they just never quite acknowledge the child. So eventually the child learns, well, you know, every time I try, I'm, I'm,

Starting point is 00:32:31 I put this thing out there that I think is so great. Met with disappointment and heartbreak. Eventually the child just internalizes everything. The system actually turns against itself and they actually start hiding who they are in the ground. So again, like the endurers are like very big people. They move very slow.

Starting point is 00:32:46 They come to things very slow. But everything also has a gift. Those are people who have stamina for everything. You can throw like a nuclear bomb at them and they're like, okay, I'll just keep coming. You know, like forever. There's a gift in everything. Everything has a gift. Everything has a gift.

Starting point is 00:32:59 Because look, and every one of these things has a very, very wide spectrum from people who have it very light and barely even notice it to people who are in pattern constantly and never leave. So, you know, it's certainly useful to know where you're at. And this is why there's really not a one-size-fits-all solution to personal development or spirituality. And honestly, like the people who have more holes in the beginning of the patterns, like one to to three years old will tend to be the people who relate to themselves as empaths very sensitive type of people because that part of the developmental cycle it's important for their survival to feel what other people are feeling to start guarding themselves okay in the later parts like aggressive pattern rigid pattern stuff like that those are

Starting point is 00:33:41 the people who become very um good at getting things right? Like you're a very good doer. Like you just will get shit done, but you've had to learn the sensitivity piece. Well, yeah, I, I only think I, I had no grasp on empathy until whatsoever,

Starting point is 00:33:54 like six years ago. Right. And it was, it was a fucking big aha. It's a wake up call. It hit me. Like I was like, yeah,

Starting point is 00:34:03 I think I know what empathy is, but you know, people who are empathetic are stupid. Yeah. And it's similar for meup call it hit me like i was like yeah i think i know what empathy is but you know people are empathetic or stupid yeah and so and similar for me too because it was like uh it was like i was thinking about feeling i wasn't feeling right it was like a sociopathic type of way of looking at things and i remember like actually being scared about that at some point because i remember recognizing that like my mom would say i love you and i would say i love you back and i'm like i don't actually feel anything and that's scary and that scared me i'm like my mom would say i love you and i would say i love you back and i'm like i don't actually feel anything and that's scary and that scared me i'm like my mom says i love you i feel nothing it's like one that i know i'm supposed to say it so i will exactly yeah again rigid right rigid

Starting point is 00:34:33 aggressive i've had that experience it's almost weird it was like yeah like i guess i'll say that to you yeah i'll chameleon it because i know that that's what people say in the situation would you say that you say people who lack empathy are they they become chameleon it because i know that that's what people say in the situation would you say that you say people who lack empathy are they they become chameleons or uh i think like in the sociopathic type of way you find because like look those people are um they're very good at looking at the world and seeing how things are run like i understand rules so like you could put me in any environment i'll observe for a little bit and I'm like, okay, cool. I see the patterns here. So I can, uh, develop myself to fit into those patterns very quickly and it'll make it seem like I know what the fuck is going on or stuff like that. But I might not be feeling any resonance in my body whatsoever. So now I'm, but that also makes me

Starting point is 00:35:17 on guard because I don't feel, I don't have that feedback. So I'm constantly on alert, like, okay, who's here to fuck me over. Right. So, and what's important about this is, we can look at this geopolitically or in other ways. This is why we have such a difficult time seeing eye to eye on things, because the sensitive people, they look at the doers and they're at awe at the fact that they can get shit done. They're like, how are you not so scared of everything right now? And we look at the sensitive people and we're like, hey off your ass and do something like change your life but they're so overwhelmed by what they're feeling that they just can't get it together so what's really important to understand is whatever you're at you can basically only see the world from your pattern everything else is like as if it doesn't even exist for you so when you hear other people saying that stuff you think that they're doing it

Starting point is 00:36:03 wrong like what the fuck are you talking about that That's not how things are. And we get to start becoming much more in tune with one another about how we're viewing the world so that we can actually start communicating in a way that works for people. And that's one of the beautiful things about studying these kinds of things is when you start realizing what pattern you're talking to, your approach to how you communicate with them, how you are around them can shift in order to put their system at ease. When we are not in restful connection with one another, problems arise. When we're not in restful connection with ourselves, problems arise. And that's kind of what I've seen for the last three years. I've been practicing a lot on how do you get the body into a restful connection state. Yeah, that's huge because one of the things that I've looked at is

Starting point is 00:36:47 people are chronically upregulated. It's chronically stressed. I don't sleep well. It's hard to learn new tasks. Just simply relaxing some people will brag about uh like oh i never sit still like i'm always doing something yeah it's like well that's that's actually not a healthy way of being that's right yeah i i i think we've gotten i don't think there's one thing we can look at and say this is causing the problem i think from from vaccines to environmental impact to the way that we're socially raising people

Starting point is 00:37:29 um to how we've learned to deal with stress it's like the human body is built for acute stress not built for chronic stress 70 of people in america have some kind of chronic disease you know like something's going on like a big picture thing that we get to start looking at and like why aren't we tuned in to the human body? So another thing I can kind of teach this audience is there's basically four levels of consciousness. So you have a gross level consciousness, a subtle energy consciousness, what's called causal consciousness, and then non-dual. So when you do ayahuasca, you're in the oneness. This is like a non-dual type of consciousness.

Starting point is 00:38:03 Get a glimpse in the non-dual. Yeah. Not forever. Again. It's just a moment. Everything, by the way, is a glimpse. Like the best thing is like you get a glimpse and you're like, oh, wow, that's available to me.

Starting point is 00:38:12 Like how now can I find a journey that allows me to reveal that more to myself, so to speak? So like gross is, you know, your physical body. So right now you and I are sitting here. We barely have any awareness of our body at all. Right. But if I like smack you on the head, boom, pain, which is an energy that draws your attention to things, right? So pain is not bad. It's just something that says, hey, I need your attention right now. And pain is very different than suffering. Boom, I feel it. Oh, my head,

Starting point is 00:38:36 right? I'm so aware of my head, gross sensation. Then there's like the subtle vibrations in the body. And that's what I've been working with for like three years. Like how do you get your awareness into the subtle sensations in the body? if you want to heal a lot of subconscious quote-unquote stuff that people talk about i think that without that awareness you're up shit's creek basically and i would agree yeah you got to feel what's happening yes like uh i've experienced a little bit of overwhelm this week and if i I drop in, I can feel the buzz. There's a humming. And the energy is just humming.

Starting point is 00:39:12 It's a different thing than when I'm on another day where there's no overwhelm. And it's a different feeling altogether. That's right. So for those at home listening, if you're like what the hell are these two you know morons talking about um you know the first thing i want to like offer you guys is um it's not that weird to talk about energy um i recently i've been saying this a lot nikola tesla has this line that i'll paraphrase he says you want to understand the universe he's like look at energy frequency and vibration okay he doesn't say deal with matter he doesn't say deal with time or space there's energy

Starting point is 00:39:45 frequency and vibration i think we can all agree he's probably one of the smartest people that's lived in quite a while right so if he's offering that then you know like show me anything physical in this universe that is doesn't have an energy counterpart right basically everything we're looking at is just space and atoms held together by consciousness so you know here's a really simple thing to do is to just instead of like looking at your hands just start putting your awareness on your hands and if you do that for a few seconds you're going to start feeling like a buzzing in your hand or like a heat in your hand or just some kind of increased sensation in your hand and notice that as your awareness is going there you're you're noticing more so you've

Starting point is 00:40:25 probably heard where your attention goes energy flows um so this you could do this with everything and like you said when you have overwhelm and stress most of the time that's occurring in your stomach so if you put that awareness in your stomach you'll find okay there's some kind of collapse or tightening or bracing that's happening in there and if you're listening to this i want to remind you you're going to try this, that your stomach is a three-dimensional object. It has a front, a back, sides. It has an inside and an outside. And you can actually pinpoint in that space exactly where it's happening. Is it happening inside the stomach? Is it on the top of the stomach? Where is this tightness? And whatever experience you're going through and wherever that

Starting point is 00:41:01 sensation is in the body, guess what? That's what it's tied to. So, if you're just doing personal development work and you're trying to understand how things are working, that's great. But the sensation has already happened. You're already in pattern. And it doesn't matter how much you understand, you're not going to have an understanding that's going to catch it before the sensation started in the body. Right. Because just like I said, I was walking down the street. I wasn't thinking I'm in threat, but my body is experiencing some kind of threat and a sensation is beginning to brew in the system.

Starting point is 00:41:32 So what ends up happening is, let's say there's a tending in the stomach. My mind, my inner critic mind, not my inner witness mind is watching it, actively watching it like this hawk that's fucking wants to get involved with everything, right? And it's watching it and it's fixating on the sensation in my body. I'm not even noticing that part. It's a subconscious fixation. Yeah, it's a subconscious fixation. And then it starts

Starting point is 00:41:52 telling you a story about what that sensation means. And that story is just your survival pattern. Now it's the pattern at play. You're in automation and it's telling you the story, but the story is a distortion. But the moment that story happens, it's like you're picking up glasses, you're putting on your face and but the story is a distortion. But the moment that story happens, it's like you're picking up glasses, you're putting it on your face, and the whole world becomes that distortion. And everybody knows this. You get disappointed or upset about something in the morning, right? And maybe it's about you didn't get a pay raise or something.

Starting point is 00:42:18 Does the disappointment stay in the realm of I didn't get a pay raise or suddenly it's like my fucking health sucks, my marriage sucks. You know, like everybody who's driving, everyone sucks. It's like everything sucks because the distortion becomes your view of reality. Now, the only way to get out of that is to bring yourself back to presence and out of the pattern. But most people, like I said, are just in pattern all the time. So they don't even know that there's a life outside of pattern. And like you said, I think one of the reasons plant medicines is great is you get a glimpse at a pattern. You get a break. You get a break. You get this pattern interrupt from this freaking thing. And suddenly you're

Starting point is 00:42:55 like, oh my God, life doesn't have to be this way. Now you might not know how to stabilize that energy or that frequency that you saw in there. However, just the fact that you know that it's possible is already a huge upgrade. And then I find that if you know it's possible, you'll be looking for it again where your attention goes, energy flows, and the experiences that will bring that stabilization to you will naturally arise in your experience.

Starting point is 00:43:17 Yeah. Yeah. So talk about subtle there. Causal? Mm-hmm. Causal, I think, is a little bit too esoteric for this conversation um it because i don't i don't quite know how to explain it it just needs to be experienced i would say it's like a it's rest beyond rest like the mind can rest maybe in meditation it's like you're in in a void

Starting point is 00:43:41 space so to speak um when i'm in causal i feel like i'm at the top of everest but there's no wind and there's no noise yeah like imagine just being like at the top of the mountain isolated and like this peacefulness that's there um there's just nothing shaking the system you're just like i think it's why people do things like float tanks and stuff like that is that release allows you to get more into like a causal space so like a like a theta like a theta state in meditation would be about as close as i can point out yeah i try to get in the tank at least once a week yeah definitely doesn't it doesn't happen immediately and it didn't happen the first few times sure tank it was i got in the tank the first dozen

Starting point is 00:44:20 times and i had good experiences i had had experiences that I could tell that there was some type of progress being made. It was something I was learning about myself. I did hit a point, and I want to go back to what you were talking about, is having that feeling in your body and having a story attached to that. I was in a tank maybe a year ago and I had the experience of, I was like, oh, I'm going to just start doing a body scan from my toes all the way up to my head. And of course I, I scanned about two inches when I found some tension and I was like, all right, well, I'm going to be with that tension. So I stayed with the tension. And then I noticed this story pop up and it was this whole story popped up and it, the whole story unw and because in the tank it's it's uh

Starting point is 00:45:07 what i find is i don't stack too much like you were talking about it's like oh i've got this problem now i've got these 10 other problems yeah you can focus on that one thing that that story is attached to i watched that story and then all of a sudden i realized well that story it no longer held any weight it was like the story is like i saw how not true it was well this is not a true story it's just bullshit i attached a lot of meaning here and i went away all of a sudden i could feel the tension in my foot completely dissipate and go oh shit and i worked my way up my entire body and uh yeah that's great practice that was I got out of the tank very relaxed that day and very down regulated I slept like a baby yeah and now that's a regular practice in a tank so let's so let's give some science to what's

Starting point is 00:45:55 happening there so we mentioned the stomach so what I like to do with my students is have them look down the center meridian channel specifically stomach heart and mind so if like i'm talking to a student and they tell me some story i said where is that happening they said i feel tension in my stomach okay i say what are you afraid of stomach indicates fear a deep like young fear like uh life is directly a threat type of fear uh heart if they tell me it's in their heart so what are you sad about you immediately know because this is the how the channel moves if it's up here what are you frustrated about what are you sad about? You immediately know because this is how the channel moves. If it's up here, what are you frustrated about? What are you angry about, right? And

Starting point is 00:46:27 everyone knows you're frustrated. There's so much energy up here. You feel like you're hijacked. You're suddenly like not even in your head. It's kind of this weird experience. So if you think about the body, the body intakes energy in a lot of different ways, okay? So when we don't think of the energy system, we think, okay, well, I'm intaking energy from food. Yes, that's true. But technically, our body is like this, just takes in sunlight energy so to speak right um because like food is whether you're eating a plant or whether you're eating an animal like that animal ate a plant and that was photosynthesis and that's sunlight energy so we're energizing the body we're um putting that in if you put food in what do you want to do you want it to metabolize properly

Starting point is 00:47:02 if it didn't and you were constipated let's's say, and the food can't excrete itself from your body, you're going to have dis-ease or stress on the body, and that's going to be a problem for you, right? So if you think about our energy systems, it's the same thing. We're like walking out in the world, and we're constantly intaking energy information, right? Energy from other people, energy from our environment. This is all good. This is trying to give us feedback, right? But we've learned, don't be angry, don't be sad. And instead of looking at the opportunity that these things provide in terms of feedback in our system, we go, I'm not supposed to be experiencing this. I need to be joyful. And now you're putting even more stress on the system because you're not letting it be. So if you think about taking energy in through the body

Starting point is 00:47:40 and it's in there and you're uncomfortable. You want that energy to metabolize through the system, but it can't do that if you're not in a restful state. So, you're essentially those contractions that are happening in the system are holding on to that energy and it's activating this survival response, so to speak. So, when you relax like you did and you put your attention on that thing, the energy is just moving through and doing what it wanted to do because your body has this natural intelligence. None of us have to eat food and go, okay, take those proteins and move them over here. Take these carbohydrates and move them over here.

Starting point is 00:48:14 Like the body's doing it. We don't cut our finger and start giving our body advice on how to sew that cup back up or mend that bone. We don't have to do that. But think about how you manage yourself emotionally or how you manage yourself mentally, constantly giving yourself fucking input. Like, you know, better instead of just trusting that your body just knows how to move things through. So now my focus used to be like, Hey, let's do this work so you can feel better. So you can be happier. And I'm like, wow, I was so wrong about that. Cause the work is not

Starting point is 00:48:44 about trying to make you feel better. The work is about getting you better at feeling. That's all it is. Get better at feeling. And we have a world that's devoid of this. So when you get better at feeling, now experiences are coming through. But because I can be in a relaxed state, no matter what experience is coming up, guess what? The energy is metabolizing. That piece in my system is, yeah, it's tense, but I can notice that and I can relax and let it go because it doesn't really matter if I understand the psychology. Is that interesting? For sure. Philosophically interesting, fun to look at, fun to talk about, but the real value is in who gives a fuck what the psychology is behind what that sensation is. That psychology is tied to that sensation. So, if I can release and let that

Starting point is 00:49:24 energy move, of course, the psychology around it, the story around it is tied to that sensation. So if I can release and let that energy move, of course the psychology around it, the story around it is going to disappear and dissipate along with that sensation. And that's the real programming. I find that is a pretty big leap for people. They really want to have the psych. It's like everyone, what I've noticed is,

Starting point is 00:49:42 and maybe it's just because I hang out with people like me, but they want, they need to go through the psychology first. Then I went through the psychology really hard, and then I hit a point where I go, oh, feelings. I got to get into the feelings. I got to the feelings. I go, oh, the feelings are – this is where a lot of things are originating. If I can be with that, the thoughts. Take care of themselves. They just, they wash away.

Starting point is 00:50:11 That's right. Yeah. Because before it was like, yeah, and, you know, totally valid. Before I would be around like my parents or people that overwhelm me or stress me out or something like that. And I would be like managing myself on the inside. There's like this meddler. So what you said, like the story came up, it's what we call the protector. Something is coming up to try to protect you, to try to buffer you from that overwhelm. And this every single time you have overwhelm,

Starting point is 00:50:36 stress, anxiety in the system and stress and anxiety are a part of overwhelm. So just holistically as an overwhelm in the system, your system has developed ways to try to buffer you from that experience. But this is what ends up happening. It's like the pattern is avoiding what's happening and you're bypassing an opportunity to feel it through. Now, what ends up happening is that the things that went in were uncomfortable. Like that doesn't feel good, right? It doesn't mean that it's suffering. It just means I'm not comfortable with that feeling.

Starting point is 00:51:00 Again, you drink ayahuasca, is everything like hunky-dory, beautiful? No, there's like- I've had to have that experience. Yeah, there's some really uncomfortable shit that comes up like physically and what what do people do when they first drink medicine they tighten up they fight against it they don't want to purge right they they're trying to hold on to the energy because that's what you've been taught to do don't talk about it don't deal with it if it's ugly if it's frustration if it's anger don't show those things things because our parents were uncomfortable

Starting point is 00:51:25 with those things and their parents were more uncomfortable with those things. So when we showed anger when we were kids, we were met with love. We were met with, stop doing that. So our system has never seen that you can feel that thing, remain in connection, feel safe, and that unconditional love is present. And if you want to resolve things in your system, those three things have to be present because that's medicine for your system. If you would exude anger one time and the moment somebody was like, and they could just be with it because they've already resolved that in their system, your system starts getting medicine, starts getting a new frequency. And it's just like learning to ride a bike. You don't learn to ride a bike from understanding. It's a feeling

Starting point is 00:52:03 that you get in your system, a frequency of vibration. And then that frequency of vibration teaches you the wisdom of the action. So everyone's trying to understand through the mind so that they can change their actions, so they can change the way that they're being. What I'm offering here is just feel into how you're being. Trust that your body knows how to resolve it.

Starting point is 00:52:20 Relax and let that thing come up. Even if it's uncomfortable, it's a momentary lapse. And maybe it'll last a few days, weeks, months. It depends on you and how that's going to go and how your system needs to resolve that. When it does though, it's resolved. And then you'll go be around your parents and you won't have to manage yourself. That response is just gone, period. And you'll be sitting there going, how the fuck did that just happen? Because you'll remember that you used to freak out when your mom said put on a jacket and now you're like i don't feel anything about that i just feel love i've had that experience of having uh well growing a lot

Starting point is 00:52:55 yeah and then going back and visiting family for holidays and it's as if they're completely different people sure it's like they appear different to me. That's right. And it, it, it all of a sudden what was difficult is now easy. So it's like you either get to see the world at a pattern or you get to see the world at a presence. And very few people have practiced and truly being in presence and in presence,

Starting point is 00:53:17 there's really nothing. It's just a void. It's just love. It's connection. It's safety. Um, you know, but most people,

Starting point is 00:53:24 again, they're regretting their past or they're worried about the future in some way and it really is just a fact that their system has these very deep grooves that the energy moves through that makes it difficult but look it takes repetition i read a i read a study that said um for an elite sport athlete to change some kind of mechanics like you know from a, throwing move or whatever to something else, that they need at least 3,000 repetitions to rewire that. And so we're thinking about elite athletes who have so much awareness over their body

Starting point is 00:53:56 and how the toe touches the ground when they run, right? So 3,000 times to repattern. For somebody who doesn't have that level of awareness, 30,000 times to do that same action to repattern. For somebody who doesn't have that level of awareness, 30,000 times to do that same action to repattern it. So if you think about us too, it's like every time you had this response, right? And whatever response you're thinking about right now, that makes you upset. Notice that that's not a new response. Like, yeah, okay, maybe today your spouse was part of that, or yesterday it was your kids, or before that was your mother, but it's the same response that you've had for for decades and decades and decades and every time

Starting point is 00:54:28 you've done that it's like taking a knife and making a groove in a rock and you've just been doing that for like 30 years like it's gonna be a deep groove in that rock and if we pour water on it where's the water go right into the groove right that's where the energy is going to move so when you uh release energy um and new information comes into the system it's like new groove and it's like new groove. And it's like you're scratching it from the beginning. And like anything else that requires repetition on your part, what I find though is, is when you stop tasking the mind with figure out what's going on and you stop meddling in what the body is doing, the body will resolve it very quickly um like now things that used to take me about a year

Starting point is 00:55:06 with a client take me 30 days or less because we don't sit there trying to analyze again it's interesting yeah okay that happened to you and your kid i can see why that traumatized you etc but so what okay now you understand that does that empower you maybe maybe a little bit like okay cool i can do things a little bit different but there's an effort behind that and what i'm talking here it's like it's like an effortless um resolution to what's happening in people's systems yeah that's similar uh one thing that's happened in the retreats that we do is uh when when i started it was a lot of story and we've got no point where it's like not even fucking important not important important. Let's get to the feeling. Some people can get into the feeling of it like gravy.

Starting point is 00:55:50 It's easy. Sure. And some people, it takes them a little bit longer. Like the girl that was the dancer. I'm sure she's in the feel instantaneously. Yeah. She could just get there. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:56:00 I've had people surprise me. Yeah, for sure. I mean, I think more than even feelings or emotions, because the feeling is what the mind is saying about the sensation. Oh, I feel sad. I feel angry. That's already a judgment from the inner critic. So the mind is like inner witness, inner critic, inner praiser.

Starting point is 00:56:18 Most people are just in the inner critic all the time. They think that's who they are. They don't hear a lot of praise up there. The inner witness is the part of the mind that watches without judgment, right? So, like when people meditate, they're essentially developing their inner witness. Now, the inner witness is the piece of you that when an experience is happening, it's like energy is moving through and you're watching it like a bus that's coming by. But most people get on the bus and they go for the ride. When you're an inner witness, the experience still happens, right? Because your body's still responding to that stimulus,

Starting point is 00:56:48 but instead of getting on the bus, you just watch the bus drive by and you don't get on for that ride. And that's what I found over the last three years, why I feel so much more peaceful than I used to is, yeah, my body still responds at times to those things with much less degree, but I just watch it go by. Something that may have taken a month takes a matter of minutes now and I'm through it. It's great. Yeah. What are some practices that out of all the stuff we talked about, practices people could put in place that would help them develop that inner witness you said, meditation is one, but maybe in coping with some of these patterns as well. Yeah. I think we mentioned a few things.

Starting point is 00:57:26 So I do think like body scanning, that's what Vipassana teaches too. Really great. You know, number one thing is like get into the subtle energy system. So again, if you want to just do a really quick practice is just sit here and just put some awareness on your hands. See if you can notice increased sensation on your hands

Starting point is 00:57:41 and then just move it around your body. Like move it down to your left foot, move it to your right foot, move it to to your knee it doesn't have to be that quick you could sit there for 30 seconds a minute see how you feel and then like move it to places like your stomach your heart i did this with my dad maybe like six months ago he's like this is the first time i've ever felt my heart i'm like i know and he was like radically altered for like two straight weeks like just because he put some attention on his heart it was like a different man um so what i find now is um how much awareness could you leave in the body how much because we've talked about this on the show before but when the typhoon hit in indonesia

Starting point is 00:58:16 and that giant wave was there there's reports of people just standing on the shoreline just watching this 300 foot wave coming why because there's no programming in the brain that says 300 foot wave run you idiot right so all these people died but no animals died because the animals where are they they're in the subtle energy body system if you've ever tried to sneak up on the cat you see it cat doesn't need to turn around to know that you're coming it feels the shift in the energy that's coming towards it and it feels something happen in its system and knows energy's moving i gotta go right again it feels something happen in its system and knows energy is moving. I got to go. Right.

Starting point is 00:58:47 Again, it's super quick. So it's like, there's another intelligence in the body. And even in the most scientific ways today, they say the gut is your second brain. Yeah. I believe that your gut is actually your first brain.

Starting point is 00:58:58 They're looking at the vagus nerve. Right. And that's the nerve that ties the brain and the gut together. And 90% of the information that's being transmitted is going from the gut to the brain. That's right. And only 10% from the brain to the gut. So it's... Took the words out of my mouth.

Starting point is 00:59:12 Yeah. There you go. I was going to say, for every one signal the brain's sending down to the gut, the gut sends nine signals back up to the brain. And this makes sense because you walk into a room and you don't think, I'm not safe here. But you have an intuitive hit in your gut that's like, I shouldn't be in this room. I shouldn't be working with that person. I shouldn't be in this relationship. But we've learned, justify that with your brain. Give it evidence. And faith and spirituality doesn't require evidence. Like, you know, however you choose

Starting point is 00:59:38 to live is how you choose to live. If something inside of you says, I shouldn't be in this relationship, you don't need to go and interview 50 of your friends to find out that you shouldn't be in that relationship anymore. Trust that your body has an intelligence. It's giving you the right feedback. And if you have the courage to live that, you're going to find yourself living a life that most people can only dream of personally. I really think it's like pretty much that simple. But to your question about what can you do, I find there's three things that you really want to focus on with your energy. Number one is find your core. Because the first thing you do when you're overwhelmed is you abandon your core. And that's like abandoning your child. So if you think about the core,

Starting point is 01:00:12 this is the youngest part of you, right? Like this is your child. And all the trauma happened really young. So all most of your trauma that is you're really dealing with is gut based a lot of it, right? And then there's like the heartbreak came later, because when you're a little kid, you don't realize heartbreak, it's not doesn't occur to you so you have all this stuff happening here in your gut so if you think about the adult that you are i call this like the false adult the false adult was the person because the child believes that it's doing things wrong like if two parents get divorced what's the first thing we say to a kid it's not your fault because we know instinctively the child's going to blame themselves.

Starting point is 01:00:49 So think about every traumatic event. Not only did it happen to you, but you blamed yourself as the culprit of why it happened. So if you're in an identity that everything you're doing is wrong, do you want to hang on to that identity? Or are you like, I got to get out of this fucking thing. So here comes the adult. The adult comes online, the false adult. And what is the false adult? The false adult is the one that turns away from the kid. It hides it. It puts it away. It says, don't look at this, which is why everybody's the exact opposite of how they feel inside. Because now this whole identity is about compensating for what you thought was messed up. And then we try to go out into the world. We travel, we find a spouse, we buy things, going, I need to find myself. Trying to attach all these things to our identity so we can find ourselves. And we still feel like con men or con women to ourselves because what do we do we already turned

Starting point is 01:01:30 away from what we are so the the truth is is like we want to turn back towards that child and we actually want to become for ourselves the parent that we never had we want to start like parenting our inside the way that you wished you got parented when you were a kid. Cause look, even right now, if you resolve everything with your parents in the present and you have a great relationship with your parents, awesome.

Starting point is 01:01:51 But that child didn't have that parent. Yeah. They still, they're still traumatized, stuck in time over there. So you want to learn how to soothe your system the way that you imagined, like the ideal parent would soothe that system. So again,

Starting point is 01:02:03 in your, you want to put attention and keep as much as awareness in your core and hold it there all the time. And notice that when you're upset, overwhelmed, you've abandoned your core. So slide the energy back down here. So that's number one. Number two is we want to find the ground because the ground energy is what stabilizes us, right? So the core is like the base, the stabilization, but now we need something to hold on to down here. So then we want to keep our attention on ground. So like on your feet, your feet touching the ground, energy there. And then lastly, you have like an energy field around you, like a cell membrane, so to speak.

Starting point is 01:02:37 And if you think about the function of cell membranes, it's to keep energy out here and choose what comes in and what comes out but when you've stopped paying attention to this everything goes in this is why empaths are always like i'm so overwhelmed so overwhelmed yeah because you have no felt sense of this membrane that you have that actually manages what energy moves in and out so um and that's like uh three legs of a stool it can't stand without it or a gps you need three points to find the center to get those coordinates i feel the same thing like these are like the three points that are really pivotal and the more you develop awareness on these three things the more stability i find that you get in the system boom boom love it and so yeah again i just wanted to remind you guys stomach fear

Starting point is 01:03:20 heart sadness mind angry so if you're feeling if you're going through something and you just put awareness, okay, where is it? In my stomach, in my heart, my mind, that should give you insight right away, oh, I'm sad about something. And you can say, okay, well, what am I sad about? Well, I'm sad my wife said that thing and made me feel like I'm not enough of something. Cool. Right. Well, where is that happening? Don't deal with your wife. Don't deal with it out here. Nothing changes when you deal with things out here. And just like Michael pointed to, it's like the more he does the inner work, he goes to see his family. It's like, who are these people? You know, they've shifted because you've shifted. Your reality will show up to reflect the energy that's

Starting point is 01:03:57 in your body. And if you wake up in the morning and you're pissed off and you're disappointed, you don't get on the road and you're like, hi, everybody, this is awesome. Everyone's driving at the perfect speed. And I get to where I want to get going. Oh, look at all this love. You're like, everyone's driving so fucking slow today. What's causing that? And this is what we want to start paying attention to is that reality is showing up to reflect your energy. And if you want to have an amazing life that's full of synchronicity, love and connection, you don't need to start developing anything out here at all because that will automatically shift as you shift.

Starting point is 01:04:28 So it's like just start paying attention to your own body. 100% agree. Yeah. This has been amazing. Yeah. Mic drop. Mic drop. Where can people find you?

Starting point is 01:04:40 Yeah, so my brother and I are partners in an organization called Satori Prime. Um, right now, like the easiest way to check us out is either head to SatoriPrime.com. Um, but I recommend checking out our collective, which is our, um, uh, community. Um, it's a really low resistance way to come start working with us. So, uh, SatoriPrime.com backslash collective, check out the page. And if you have any questions, then it's easy to reach out to myself and my brother from there. Dope.

Starting point is 01:05:07 Thanks for coming on the show today. My pleasure. Thanks for having me. Thanks for making it through the show with us. I know you're now much more enlightened. I want to remind you, we have a live event coming up June 15 in Venice, California.

Starting point is 01:05:23 We're doing Breath and Ice with my favorite breath dude on the planet. I've traveled the world doing all sorts of cool stuff and he's top notch. So we're bringing him all the way from Virginia to Venice to do breath work. And we're going to hold a little party afterwards. So go to enlifted.com slash shrug get on the newsletter list and what we'll do is we'll email you the info for the registration there's only 20 spots available for that and additionally if you're a coach

Starting point is 01:05:53 we've got three more weeks before the next strong coach program begins take that action get in there and also remember the sponsor is Organifi.com slash shrug to save 20 on your greens drink and if you want to heat yourself up in a box go to sunlight and.com use the code shrug collective you save 200 bucks get free shipping thanks guys

Barbell Shrugged - The Bledsoe Show #128

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