Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet - 106: MLMs in Utah

Episode Date: December 9, 2020

If you can get past our weird improv, you'll get to hear all about a great opportunity. Get in on the ground floor of our new oat milk multilevel marketing company! We'll even let you be a CEO! Boss babes only. Get your Karma Back To You pin before they sell out! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon at patreon.com/beachtoosandy! Subscribe to Christine's YouTube channel to watch her read creepy stories! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCb-gAs8Evw3ht70wTk1TiMA Listen to Alex's newest podcast, Human Seeking Human: https://linktr.ee/humanseekingpod Logo by Courtney Aventura. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Welcome to Beach to Sandy Water to Wet, a podcast featuring real reviews written by people who just need the world to know what they think. need the world to know what they think. Between you and me, I wanted to like this podcast, but I'd give it zero stars if I could. Hey, Alex Inner. Yeah, what's up? I know we haven't talked since high school, but girl, I have an opportunity for you. Oh, great.

Because I am a single mom and I am really easily exploited by terrible people. So that's great to hear what you got for me. Because as another person being exploited by a terrible person, I'd like to extend that opportunity to start your own small business at home while you craft DIY projects. Okay. The thing is... For your front door.

I have this thing where when i i told myself if i started a new job i'd only start at the ceo level oh fantastic you're just the gal i've been looking for emoji emoji emoji emoji you won't believe it brain exploding emoji you can be your own CEO. Oh my gosh. Just look at this Subaru I bought. Subaru. Wow. Finger. Finger paint. Finger.

What's it called? Fingernail polish. Emoji. Also, I've got finger paint on the brain because of my children that I totally have. Yeah, that you're always crafting with. It's not because I'm a man who is just awkwardly trying to pretend to be a woman on a podcast. Well, I can tell that you have some anxiety, and I think my new blend of essential oils will also really ease all of your woes. will also really ease all of your woes.

Put it on your feet, and then you won't get coronavirus, and also you won't be anxious, and you will be the most beautiful lady in all the land. The stuff I put on my feet, can I also put it in my food to season it? Actually, I recommend it only works if you do both. Oh, wow. That's fantastic. You also should put it in your children's eyes oh like your husband's while he's sleeping anywhere that you can really find um an orifice ex-husband is that to kill him or put that put that i'm done with that yeah put that in any

orifice you can find anyway welcome to our show is so dumb. We're two improv graduates hosting a podcast called Beach TC and New Water Tuet where we read the worst reviews in the most dramatic fashion. My name is Christine. My name is Alex. This is not an improv show. No. Don't worry. You found that out five seconds in when we weren't really doing improv um this is this week's episode is about mlms uh lovely lovely lovely corporations called mlms multi-level marketing schemes pyramid schemes whatever you want to call them as alexander said just don't call them a small business yeah then they're changing it up like network they're like network marketing which you know all this it sounds so like on paper sounds not too bad you're like network marketing yeah it's like just buzzwords

to get you into uh into their web to their web they're weaving yeah so i would like to start off by saying um i am not a fan of mlms i know several people who have been. I don't think anyone's wondering that after that intro. I would like to start off by saying that I know several people who have been taken advantage of and have lost life savings, have lost friendships, have lost relationships, have really suffered at the hands of MLMs. So I am not apologizing for my dislike of them. I am also I want to make the caveat that I am not trying to insult people who work within the confines of an MLM because that's the whole point about Zinnerset is that they target people and exploit people exactly. So before anyone yells at me I'm not saying you're a bad person if you you know are selling jam berry nail

wraps or whatever the hell but um you know don't sell to me and also uh watch out please don't tell us why what you do is not an mlm we're not coming for if if you're like oh they're coming for me no we're not we don't we're not if that's what you're thinking right now we're not unless you're like the ceo of like lula world and we're not talking a ceo um oh sorry yes the real ceo the one who actually doesn't drive a super but drives like four lexuses and uh doesn't give a shit about the employees yeah exactly so shall we i'll get started i found doterra on glassdoor oh so be clear too we're doing utah because utah is like a hotbed for these companies there's a lot of articles online if you're interested in reading about that but um we stuck to i think we did right like yeah except for my last one which was a little different anyway it's not okay yeah you'll see but my last one is not the rest of them are utah based so the first

one is doTERRA they sell essential oils if you don't know but i went on glassdoor and it was not good well mainly because if you go on glassdoor it's not the employees as in you don't generally see the people who are actually on the bottom level selling the doTERRA. You see like and you don't see corporate people. You see call center people. You see people who are shipping. Yes. Shipping call center people who are working at a physical location for the company. So they most likely actually receive.

I learned that when I saw, oh, my benefits. And I went, benefits? That's definitely not a distributor. Oh, it's like shipping. Still, they might mean the fact that they get some $200 worth of oils each month or something. Yikes. They also get those as a benefit. Yikes.

And $200 worth of oils is what two oils or something apparently they're super expensive i don't know anyway let's read a glass door review of doterra mlm scam pros nothing about this was a pro this company is fraudulent you will not make any money you'll alienate your friends and family and you will find yourself selling snake oil. Cons. No money to be made. Scamming your friends and loved ones. Advice to management.

Shut down. End of review. I don't even know if that was a real employee who wrote that. Did it say their job title? No. Interesting. Just current employee but this was the only one that i could find that even mentioned it being an mlm all of the other complaints everything else that i read was very much focused on management issues um which there

appear to be a lot of but well i wonder if that's because it's the people the people writing glass door employee reviews are the people who are in the actual offices no exactly yeah that's what i'm saying so i don't know if this is do you think this person lost a bunch of friends and stuff that has nothing to do with the mlm it's just she lost a bunch of friends because she her hours at the warehouse were so bad yes that's what it is that's totally what it is. And they're like, well, now, even though I've been working there for so long,

I'll complain about it being an MLM, even though I knew, but just going in, I was like, eh, whatever. Yeah, a lot of these were depressing. Oh, yeah. It was just not fun at times. The Glassdoor ones especially. The Glassdoor ones always bum me out

on any theme we do. So what I did is I went to, well, first I started at Consumer Affairs, which are usually customer complaints. Okay. And then I went to Amazon. So I'm going to read first a Consumer Affairs review by Teresa, one star, of Younique. Now let me read you. That's Y-O-U.

Younique is an American multi-level marketing company that markets beauty products. So they do makeup and that kind of thing. One star by Teresa. I joined Younique August 4th, 2018. For one, make sure you get a good sponsor. Yes, that's right. My sponsor was Lindsay Burke. She wrote something on my group page to make me look bad so i asked her if she needed to say something send it to me in a message so i didn't respond to her rude message so the next morning she blows my messages up so i got off unique because of her then i wanted to join another girl that i should have joined in the first place and unique wants another 99 to get a new sponsor this isn't fair end of review okay the amount of people who are so close to the point i thought this was a disgruntled

customer or disgruntled like person who was selling this stuff um or buying this i i was because of it being a terrible predatory company and uh business model but then they're like oh i'm just annoyed that the system that you've built up to exploit people is working against me that britney's such a bitch that's all i really care about it has nothing to do with the system it's ridiculous you're so close i guess i should i know just just maybe one more one more she'll join you know heather's company and then she'll finally realize what's going on um okay so i just want to clarify real quick i know that like alexander and i know a lot about mlms just because i don't know i find them fascinating and i guess not everyone especially maybe if you're not in the u.s might not even know what the hell we're talking about so maybe i'll read a little uh can i read a little like blip about what this is because

i'm realizing now like if i were listening and i didn't know i'd be so fucking confused um so multi-level marketing or mlm um sometimes called pyramid schemes uh it's a controversial marketing strategy for the sale of products or services where the revenue of the company is derived from a non-salaried workforce selling the company's products or services where the revenue of the company is derived from a non-salaried workforce selling the company's products or services while the earnings of the participants are derived okay this is getting confusing uh so basically if you sign up to sell a product for this uni for makeup so you're selling makeup for this company you buy the makeup from the company you're not being salaried but then you have to hire other people underneath you

to sell makeup as well and then you get a portion of their revenue and then they need to hire people under them in order to make any sort of money and they get a portion of their money am i does that make any sense any yes what i'm saying you're describing a pyramid which is right like if you can like everyone if you can visualize that you can see why this doesn't work so only the very tippy top of the pyramid ends up making money in the long run like or at least a livable wage because they're getting money from every quote-unquote downstream down the lines of the pyramid but then the people at the bottom are being exploited and since you have to buy your own product to sell it you're a lot of times losing money and

you're also forced to you know recruit a certain number of people sell a certain product and if you don't if you don't sell enough then you have to buy it um out of your own pocket so it's just ends up being very predatory and um it's doomed to fail basically in the end um and so a lot of times this just becomes like you know the success of the very very tippy top uh and then it kind of tends to ruin friendships relationships and livelihoods so uh it's not great and as it turns out most of the products aren't even that good right so that's the other thing it really doesn't yeah yeah yeah not that that would make it better i'm just saying that's another part

about it right right a lot of times people only buy them to support their friends or cousins or partner whomever rather than actually like being a huge fan of the product and then you know it ends up being reliant on relationships and yada yada yada and you'd probably be surprised at a lot of uh mlms i i have been when i've learned certain things are mlms so like tupperware for example tupperware like those tupperware parties parties yeah yeah that's because it's people will get their friends and family together to try to sell them on tupperware pure romance pure romance yep that was the other one i was gonna say cutco knives uh amway which was traditionally marketed toward men quote unquote

mary k which is mary k i mean that's a classic mlM that's like the OG basically that and Amway right Amway yeah yeah those are like the old school ones yeah so um anyway and there's a lot of ones that keep popping up a lot of them are makeup um there's a lot of essential oils and a lot of times they're harmful like I watched this Netflix series called Unwell and it have you watched that yep it's very interesting the uh essential oil one is very cool because they provide both sides of it as far as like, yes, essential oils can be beneficial and helpful to relieve stress, anxiety, especially with people and people with autism. A lot of times it's really beneficial for them sensory wise, but, you know, people are telling you to put this stuff in your food and like they're not regulated and so

people get horrible skin diseases from it and reactions and rashes and people are eating it i mean it's just like yeah i'm very much not anti um essential oils but no i don't you it's it's hard to buy any without buying it from an mlm because it was so prevalent like the essential oil field anyway essential oil field oh man all right honey i'll be back i just gotta go to work in the essential oil field let me boot up my laptop and ask if monique needs any more doterra scroll through all the facebook groups that i'm in okay excuse me wow it's been a rough day oil field okay glad i could give everyone that visual i love it um okay it's your turn now right because we talked about how bitchy lindsey oh i also love in that review by the way that she says yes that's right my sponsor was lindsey burke as if there aren't like 20 000 more sponsors oh yeah and i was listening to this i'm like no one like not even the person

probably like one up your upline gives a shit about it it's like no one's gonna help you unfortunately they're not there to help you these people are there to take advantage of you um so this next review is a glass door review of perfectly posh they sell quote pampering products oh well that clarifies it yes um so just basically just like diaper ointment um here i was like what a strange mlm and very specific so this is my last of the glass door reviews i've read way too many glass doors i started on glass door and i couldn't do it it was such a bummer yeah it's a bummer y'all it's a bummer and people ask for us to do glass door it's a bummer it's like by the way is if you're also not familiar is like where employees rate their place of employment like they rate their work and you know benefits and corporate management etc here is a review by a current employee pros i love the products i love what

they stand for cons the management doesn't care about those under them in the pyramid. They bring out new products. I can't with this. Alexander, also, I literally, my jaw dropped because when you said, I love what they stand for, and then you said cons, I was like, wait a second. I know. I thought you meant they understood. Me too. That's why I'm so crazy.

I'm like, wait a second. Cons. Cons. Yeah. The management doesn't care about those under them in the pyramid. They bring out new products constantly and discontinue favorites. You have to buy these products and by the time you're able to catch up, so you think, then you have to buy new products and the ones you have are discontinued. Samples are expensive.

The constant change to the catalogs is expensive because have are discontinued. Samples are expensive. The constant change to the catalogs is expensive because we are given nothing. I do not feel valued or cared for at all. I am leaving the company. End of review. Wow. This is your big moment. I'm leaving. I hope so for you. I don't get it though. I don't get it. How can you love what they stand for? That's what I don't get it though i don't get it how can you love what they stand for that's what i don't get it's like i love the product is one thing but i love what they stand for you know it's probably their whatever made up mission statement they have claiming to like want women to feel their best you know that you see all those for like like lula roe and like it's they claim to be all about inclusiveness, independence, inclusiveness, body positivity, etc. All things that are great.

And yet they're taking complete advantage of these employees. So I shouldn't even call them employees. Some of these people, the CEOs that they're taking advantage of. So, yeah. So that must mean be what they mean when they say they love what they stand for because a lot of these companies they claim to stand for one thing while they're actually just harming their workforce yeah um when there tends to be a lot of men at the top who are taking advantage of um vulnerable people without uh you know, the funds to really keep up with a scheme that's going to,

you know, potentially impoverish them. Anyway, I now went to Amazon because Amazon apparently sells certain products of these, such as doTERRA. So I found a doTERRA, I think it's called Peace, doTERRA Peace blend on Amazon. And this is a two-star review by Marcy. This smell confuses me more than it calms me down. This oil gives me a lot of nightmares. End of review. Oh, no. Take that and run.

Like, take those thoughts and just run away like just recognize what that probably means yeah your nostrils are telling you something the comment there was a comment on it there was a comment on every comment the response on every comment that said like well not in my shop go to this link and you can buy directly from me i guarantee that you won't feel nightmares from my peppermint oil doTERRA oh my gosh shop the langston people will go i mean they have to in order to sell there they that's the problem is they have to and you shouldn't have to do that so you see all these posts i worked hours and hours and hours and hours just for this new like to get this new

person on board. It's like you shouldn't, it shouldn't be that way. You shouldn't have to be like hounding people. Yeah, like pestering your high school bully to like, you know, buy really shitty lipstick off of you. Except usually it's the other way around where it's the high school bully now pestering these people again. You're right. It's like, why would I ever buy products from you? Okay.

That's so sad oh no i did the same thing as you by the way i did go to amazon amazon um to see what perfectly posh has to sell oh they sell some cackles spackle detoxifying face mask don't get me started on the detoxifying stuff that they have yikes um here we go wait here's someone mailed me that once to the to awkward uh a mailbox the pod my old podcast mailbox i was like why does cackle spackle sound so familiar well well it's it's one of those i had never heard of it so i wouldn't be surprised if it's one of those things where you don't you don't know that it's necessarily no it's an mlm especially if you buy it off amazon anyway here's a do you see how detoxified my face is i yeah it's yep looks like you cackled spackled all over it i do cackle a lot yeah um here's a one star review

christina after you telling me that you you have this stuff here we go that shit burnt my face off i have to take it off as soon as i put it on my face my skin is never sensitive to anything end of review oh no wait actually i think that was home depot spackle they put on their face the complaints about the burning sensation that's literally literally they will complain about how it burns and people in response will say that's how you know it's working yes that's how you know it's working that means that it's quote detoxifying oh my god the toxins in your skin it's like no it's literally just like burning a layer of your skin okay with the oxidator with the you mentioned lip scents or senogens or whatever i remember i was in like an anti-mlm group on facebook i actually still am and i it's so much fun um but there is an entire sounds like mlm but okay yeah sounds like sounds like an mlm

but okay that's exactly right and um they talk about lip sense and the whole joke of it is like apparently it hurts like hell because it's just full of chemicals and shit and you put it on your mouth and it like burns the crap and they're always like no that's how you know it's just full of chemicals and shit and you put it on your mouth and it like burns the crap and they're always like no that's how you know it's penetrating the dead skin layers and it's horrifying and people are like but it hurts so much and they're like yes that means it's working and i'm like no moisturizing product is supposed to be like extremely painful on any orifice of your face. Could you imagine every day putting something on you that hurts and thinking this is good for me? I mean, if that's what but that's the thing is if you're being fed those lies and being told that and you think, wow, like, yeah, like it like it can make sense.

I mean, I used to do that with bras. Like, why am I putting this on every day? And it hurts. There you go. Good point. The lies have been fed. You know, fed so many lies. I will say so. I mean I used to do that with bras like why am I putting this on every day and it hurts there you go good point the lies have been fed you know fed so many lies I will say so to say that like show that I'm not coming from a place of judgment of the people uh I for a long time kept drinking this specific brand of oat milk every day and I felt so sick to my stomach like I'd have it with my coffee every morning I felt so sick sick to my stomach for a long ass time.

It took like a month before I was like, oh, oh, it's because I'm drinking this every day. And then I stopped it and I wasn't feeling pain anymore. Oh. But anyway, the point is I could see how someone could think, oh, this is good. This is fine. Sure. Even though they're getting. This is fine. Sure. Even though they're getting, feeling pain every day. Yeah.

No, I can see how that would like, quote unquote, make sense, especially if they use like all these scientific terms to explain it and, you know, wackadoo health terms, quote unquote. I thought you were, sorry, I thought this was going where you were going to say that oat milk was an MLM company. And I was like, what the hell are you talking about? We should start that. Okay. Just like a super healthy vegan MLM brand.

And then nobody will know. If only we had a base that we could start with. A platform? Like a platform. And we could get a bunch of people who listen to us to help us out with this. And by help us, I mean that we could exploit. You know, they could get in on the bottom floor. They could, though.

Actually, yeah, the first people who sign up will actually maybe make some money. Yeah. What if we did a podcast MLM? It'll be in the.001%. A podcast MLM. Everyone listening has to make a podcast about us, and then everyone listening to them has to make a podcast about them. And then in the end, every single podcast on the planet is about us.

I think it'll work. I think it'll work. Whoa. Yeah. That's literally my dream, is that every podcast in the world is about me. Oh, my God. Wouldn't that be an exciting place? Yeah, until the FTC comes after us.

Okay. We're getting so lost in this episode i know that's okay i feel like the topic is surprisingly heavy for it's weird this feels heavier than uh funeral homes or whatever it does because i feel like there's a lot of like explanation needed and like yeah like tiptoe not tiptoeing but like being cautious with my words because i don't want to you know i'd like i hope anyone who's actually like in an mlm isn't listening by now so maybe we can be a little less or they can understand where we're coming from at the very least yes all right so i have a two-star review by Lorna, and this is also of that same doTERRA peace blend on Amazon. I developed a rash on the bottom of my foot. In fairness, I applied way too much, according to my doctor. End of review.

I'm so glad they at least went to a doctor. Me too. Oh, my gosh. Because that happens with essential oils. That was in the Unwell doc where she said she was getting these horrible hives and they kept telling her, oh, well, you need to put peppermint oil on that to fix it. And you need to put this calming oil on it. But it was the oils that were causing it.

So she kept layering it with more and more oils until a doctor was like, you're poisoning yourself, you know? anyway geez i love when people blame the product and then they're like however i was using it completely wrong yeah that's true though too like why are you like basically soaking your foot in it in all fairness stuff's expensive how do you use i know i keep saying that but how do you even use too much like you gotta if it's that expensive they tell you to eat it they tell you to put it on your baby's head they tell you to put it on your feet to detoxify they tell you to put it behind your ears and in your nose i don't know that one might be wrong but the rest of it for sure okay speaking of lip sense so it turns out it's not actually utah based i misread something so uh but i have a lip sense review for

us great this is a from actually from makeup alley.com so it's it's where they people review makeup yes i know that website actually okay so it's it's a one-star review here of a lip sense product i have used similar products of a different brand with no problems this product burnt my lips after two days of use so badly my lips peeled and i'm left with a mouth full of ulcers i've had to limit seeing my patients as it is too sore to speak. Just warning you. End of review. What if she's like an oral surgeon?

I was like, why would you have to limit seeing her patients? Oh, right. Talking. Talking. Yeah. Could be. I don't know. They didn't clarify or talk about what their job was because

i guess it wasn't too relevant but yeah to have a mouthful of ulcers i mean and this person used it for two days two days recognized oh my gosh this is a product i'm gonna leave a review of warning for other people and stop using it so i can get back to my life but a lot of people you know are so ingrained in not only like the products but like the culture around these like it's so scary especially if they're selling it and then they're like well shit like i need to keep you know attempting to make money and make a living so it's hard to just kind of bail yeah or if like your friends are really involved i mean it's just that's it yeah it's hard to get out definitely yeah that's something that i recognize it's not it's not an easy thing to just give it up especially when you put so much money and time into something like that and like

your mouth is full of ulcers and they're like what are you trying to say and you're like and they're like oh you want to stay in lip sense longer and you're like and you just can't find your way out that's part of the once they kind of get a sense that you are thinking of leaving they're like okay give her the good stuff and then they just okay i'm sorry none of that is real please don't sue me okay but if it were that would be a great true crime podcast just saying um okay so this is actually my last one uh but there's a response so this is of doterra cinnamon bark essential oil on amazon and this is a one-star review by Diana. Does not prevent Ebola.

No, what? Is this something that you were lied to about? Yes. Oh, my God. Oh, Xenor, it's bad. The number of people who were like, people are saying this prevents coronavirus. I'm like, oh, shit. Someone was like, yeah, this pet store owner in my neighborhood was telling a bunch of little children that this oil prevented coronavirus i was like this is so dangerous

exploitative you know yeah oh my god okay does not prevent ebola i would never ever buy this after a doterra rep was selling it as an ebola cure that was about the lowest thing i've ever seen anyone do except maybe me writing this post about it okay and a review of that one oh my god there's a response you said that there's a response from amazon girl oh no please tell me that oh no you know i just played on me so you're giving this one star because you think it doesn't prevent ebola so what it has no other uses there's no profit for mainstream medicine with cinnamon bark oil so of course it'll be attacked i've benefited from many homeopathic cures that have been called quacks by the FDA. End of response. Okay.

Okay. I like that she says, because you think it doesn't prevent Ebola. It's like, oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dear. Who is using that as like a sales tactic? Like who nowadays is like, you know, I wasn't going to buy a cinnamon bark oil, but now that you tell me, I might prevent Ebola now.

Well, there was an Ebola scare a few years ago. Okay, well, then that makes more sense. Wasn't there? I have no idea. Ten years ago, maybe by now. But there was like an outbreak in West Africa. I think there were one or two cases in the U.S. One or two.

Okay, so I'm like, can't you find something else to to this prevents cold sores i don't know some herpes virus like anything claiming that it was gonna destroy the u.s and wait but also you know what actually i changed my mind because if you say it cures ebola yeah and then they're like well i didn't get ebola you can be like well cinnamon bark oil you see how effective it is? So I changed my mind, actually. I find that to be a great sales tactic. This prevents typhoid, actually. This podcast prevents typhoid.

This podcast. So if you listen to it, I can almost guarantee you that you won't get typhoid. Almost. Almost. Almost. Did you call the lawyer? almost almost did you talk call the lawyer um no because he said he wasn't interested in talking to me about this particular subject oh yeah you tried this with your other podcast that's right i tried this with my other lawyer too and i keep getting left behind none of my none of my past

lawyers have been interested in talking about this so unfortunately nobody if you're out there and you have legal experience you're probably like blackballed in like the lawyer circles then like i would be zero percent surprised if that were the typhoid woman um so this is my last one this is a more positive one kind of um it's a review of a book the book is amway motivational organizations behind the smoke and mirrors oh it's by ruth carter i have no i haven't read it but it is about uh the dangerous practices of amway and like a history of amway i think talking about you'll see let me just read this review it's a five-star review believe her this lady has done a great job of exposing the organization and the lies behind it i did amway for four years i was single an immigrant who knew next to nothing about life

in the states other than what my relatives told me and and yeah, I followed them into Amway thinking it was my dream too. I lost nearly $4,000 and the goodwill of many friends and relatives in the process, but I learned many valuable lessons. What Amway teaches is social engineering, not networking or making friends. They teach you to use people to your own benefit, to make every extra buck possible at their cost and pretend you know what is good for them. They teach you to use people to your own benefit, to make every extra buck possible at their cost, and pretend you know what is good for them. They teach you to evaluate your life purely in terms of money. Watch those videos again. The voices will seem psychologically and spiritually empty. The business, as those brainwashed idiots fondly call it, takes over their life completely,

dictates their food, what they watch on TV, how they use the internet, their spiritual life, and their relationships. People who run their own businesses do not live that way. They have normal outside lives, and the business is just what they do to make money. What scares me is the number of immigrants I used to see at every meeting, who swallow whole the story and end up burning their hard-earned dollars you lose what you made and you lose conceptually what this country really is about a place where you can be who you are despite all odds find your talents and make it trust me talents are not about selling soap don't let anyone get you into this and stay clear about what you need from life from this country.

End of review. Oh, wow. I know. And they're like, join me as I tell you more about my motivational. Literally, though. Here's a pamphlet. And if you sell my pamphlet and find other people to sell my pamphlet. It costs a low, low price of $2,500 to learn how you can get away from companies like Amway. No, I thought that

review, I had goosebumps when I read it. I know, I gotta say. Yeah, I was, I was blown away by it. It's just a one-off, like just a Amazon review on a product that has 28 reviews, but I was glad that person found a platform where they could express that because damn damn and that's just such another level of like exploitation of you know i was an immigrant and of course you trust your family and of course you know your family's not trying to steer you astray it's just this like overseeing organization that's got its little talons in you tendrils tendrils oh that's so fucked up yep that's so fucked up is uh sums up mlms pretty well so yeah yeah one thing i wanted to say before we move over to my challenge which is actually really fun so stick around for that i'm excited for it there are sites online that

give you plenty of resources whether you're trying to get out of an MLM or learn more or looking for resources actually to help someone else get out of an MLM, because that's not easy. Because you might know somebody who's being taken advantage of and you want to help them get out. Especially if they don't see it themselves, you know. Yeah, exactly. There's one site called mlmtruth.org. And if you go to mlmtruth.org slash resources, it has a bunch of resources. So it has books, documentaries, articles, podcasts. Well, and don't get me wrong.

I know that pretty much any website with the word truth.org in it sounds like it's written by a flat earther. But I'm pretty sure this one's actually on the right side of history so for once the only one truth mlm truth.org i know it sounds it sounds like the opposite you're right you're right um but what i like though is mainly that they have a list of great resources so outside of their own site so it's not just um from them so yeah time for my challenge it's a good one this was from ashlyn to find a review where someone got what they asked for but they're still unhappy oh yeah so actually i'm gonna be honest i mean i did i completed the challenge but most of them were positive. And you'll see why. They were still unhappy.

Okay, you'll see. So here is the first one. This is actually a one-star review, though. This is of a Chipotle in Milpitas, California. Probably not that. I said Milpitas because that's how it would be pronounced in, like, Ohio. But anyway, whatever it is, I didn't look it up. One star review of a Chipotle is what's important.

What the actual. Just a bunch of letters. Can you spell that? Oh, actually, I can. F-H-A-M-D-L-A-L-Q-B-D-O-A-N-X-X-Z-K-D-L-A-U. Found a quibble box. Thank you. In.

They don't have any cilantro in their rice. It was so bland. I'm actually not expecting the usual dehydration that accompanies a normal Chipotle meal. The proportions are really weird. I got more salsa than meat or rice, and I asked this one worker for a little less sour cream, and she just jacks and pollocked my bowl. I know I asked for less, but not so I find occasional specks of sour cream in my bowl. That one worker really ruined it for me.

All of your coworkers are smiling and kind. Why you gotta be so rude? If you hate working there so much much quit and stop handling my food with attitude i didn't ask for that end of review oh my god oh my head i i didn't really understand why they called it jackson pollock to my bowl because i was like wait did they get what they wanted or not they said they asked for less yeah sour cream but then the person jackson pollocked my bowl so i thought that meant they like smothered it like they like threw a bunch in there like it sounds like that but i think they meant they like speckled it exactly

and then they continued and so that's why i included it because they continued and said oh it wasn't enough sour cream like wait what i know it's exactly what i requested literally maybe i would have been happy if she smiled a little more i can't with people just say also you see them do it in front of you that's the other thing that really gets me they you saw them put the meat in the rice in the salsa and you saw them put everything in you could have said hey i want more rice even at the end you can do that and they'll say like okay and they just do it you could have said jackson pollock my burrito please actually actually try that because i'm curious what happens they probably did which

is probably why they got an attitude why they're like really uncomfortable and want you to leave yeah okay i've got three more this next one is of a ramen place in vancouver canada Why they're like really uncomfortable and want you to leave. Yeah. Okay. I've got three more. This next one is of a ramen place in Vancouver, Canada. This is a four star review. It was a cold, snowy evening. So my husband and our friend decided to have ramen. We decided to check out Gojiro together. Gohiro?

I don't know. Gohiro. They were packed when we got in, but we waited less than five minutes to be seated. We ordered spicy and basic ramen with fried chicken and marinated pork. We ordered mild spicy and rich broth and a side of marinated boiled egg. The portions were generous. The food was delicious, but the broth was a little too rich for me. the food was delicious but the broth was a little too rich for me i know i ordered a rich broth duh i loved how their noodles were al dente and the dish came with lots of bean sprouts their fried chicken is so good the portion was too much for me i barely finished half

i am a big eater great customer s the total bill for two of us was $30, including tax and tips. End of review. Aw. So, yeah. Okay. It's a fine review. Nothing bad. It's, like, fine. But they complained. I guess probably Dr. Star because it was too rich.

I'm going to say this. Like, Dad, don't take any offense, but it's something I feel like Dad would do where he would, like, tell me all about an Amazon purchase. And then the moral of the story is, yeah, it's pretty much exactly what i was expecting nothing more nothing less it's like the exact water filter i needed for my refrigerator i don't know about water filter for refrigerator when i think dad and gadgets i think of that like that uh sealer that he gets for his bread he buys all that bread and then and has one of those things that seals the vacuum sealer and then keeps the bread in his freezer do you know what

he bought he bought like what looks like a bottle warmer like for baby bottles and i was like what is this and apparently i don't know what he told me what it's for. I forget, but I guess he puts like yogurt in it or something to like warm it up. It looks like a bottle warmer for babies. And he like puts these little jars of like yogurt in it. And it like shakes them or warms them. I don't know. Are you sure this isn't like a paint spinner thing? I think I'm confusing it with the paint thing, but I'm pretty sure it warms them what are you sure this isn't like a paint spinner thing i think i'm confusing it with the paint thing but i'm pretty sure it warms them up he's gonna call me and

explain it again so i regret saying this but i remember blaze and i were like wait what is it for yogurt um he also got this ridiculous gadget oh my god it's called a cricket um alexander keep your mouth shut keep your mouth my mouth just talk about that not if you're mocking me i'm kidding i think it's a wonderful thing listen i'm into crafting right now everyone she bought a cricket and it's and she loves it and she's actually made some amazing things with it thank you sandy no i've i've enjoyed seeing the progress and i regretted buying it at first it's first. It's like a vinyl cutting machine. And I told Alexander and his eyes were glazed over like, I don't know what any of that means. Well, because you just said you bought a Cricut.

And I'm like, what? Like, I thought it was a white noise machine that made Cricut sounds. You thought it was, yeah, Cricut. I 100% thought that because I was like, that's exactly what you would buy. But then you explained it to me and I still didn't know what it was because I don't know what you would need to cut vinyl for. And then you finally showed me some crafts that you made and I was impressed and convinced that I need one now. I love it. I've made a lot of Christmas gifts already.

So I'm because at first I was like, why did I waste so much money on this thing? It's not cheap. But then I made a bunch of Christmas gifts and I was like, well, OK, I guess it's worth it. Yeah, it's it's paying for itself just by that. sure i sound like dad oh no yeah i'm just that's why i brought it up because you're just uh you know i originally bought it to cut vinyl but now i store my yogurt in it that's where you'll he'll he'll warm it up and you'll label it with the vinyl oh boy this is not a paint stir or a bottle warmer it's for yogurt only is what the vinyl will say this is next review is a five-star review of uh the hair salon so that's something ashlyn said ashlyn works at a hair salon so brought up specifically people who aren't So that's something Ashlyn said. Ashlyn works at a hair salon. So brought up specifically people who aren't. Oh, that's right.

Yeah. And guess what? My last two are exactly what Ashlyn wanted. But probably I bet Ashlyn has to deal with the one star sometimes too. Like real life scenario. Like assholes is what I'm trying to say. But yeah, here's a five star review. Okay.

Of Etude Lounge in Los Angeles. I rarely write reviews in general. I think this is my first one on Yelp, but this experience deserves being shared about. So this is actually my second time going for a haircut. Scroll down to the end of the review if you don't want to read the whole thing and just want a summary. No hard feelings. My first visit to give some background context i was referred to by my aunt's co-worker who is korean and very stylish as my aunt describes her

they both work in fashion she's a regular and she referred me to her stylist or steam who is the head director of this salon yep that sounds all right my experience was all right they weren't able to communicate too well since her English was limited and I can't speak Korean, other than those few signature phrases you learn from watching K-dramas, haha. AKA, not useful. So her assistant was there to translate for us. She was also busy. It was a Saturday afternoon, so she cut my hair in what felt like 15 minutes.

Even though I'd asked for a simple cut slash trim because I was growing out my hair at the time, I felt like she didn't give me full attention as she was switching between clients. My haircut wasn't bad. It was exactly what I asked for. But the overall experience was nothing spectacular or worth it for the drive out and paying the $50 plus tip. End of review. Okay. I will say, though, that is not the end of the full review i cut it short there oh thank god

the rest is extremely glowing and like very positive so i want to give this reviewer a lot of credit and say hey it's a very it's a five-star review so before we bash this person um but yeah i thought it was very fitting that they were like yeah you know what it wasn't bad it was literally exactly what i asked for sometimes you don't know, yeah, you know what? It wasn't bad. It was literally exactly what I asked for. Sometimes you don't know what you want. You know what I mean? I feel like this happens to me a lot when I go to a hair salon. I'm like, I want my hair, I think, to look like this.

And then they do exactly that. And I'm like, I guess maybe I didn't want it to look. Or I'm like, maybe I thought I would look better in this. I don't know. Well, it's funny you bring that up because I have a review of b salon chicago illinois this is the last one this will i think end our day wonderfully here we go oh okay i am not one to usually yelp but this salon has changed me from a total salon whore trying a stylist out for a time or two then moving on to blissful hair okay sorry i think i worded uh like my intonation or whatever was bad what if it doesn't say whore

and you just accidentally says oh shoot wait no it what that was just you had that yeah god no okay i'm not one to usually yell but this salon has changed me from a total salon whore trying a stylist out for a time or two then moving on to blissful hair monogamy for the past two years becky does my cuts and color and is amazing i have red undertones and she took me to a beautiful blonde for my wedding two months prior not room for error, to an auburn to now a chestnut brunette. Never had anyone able to work with my red undertones across a variety of hair colors before. The girl works miracles. Secondly, they run a great business. I once was feeling daring and brought in a picture of a hair color that I wanted to try. Becky gave me exactly

what I asked for. But after getting home and living with it for 24 hours, I didn't like it on me. I called, explained that despite her doing what I asked, I just didn't like it. Becky was out of town. They immediately worked me in with several other staff members and never made me feel like I was inconveniencing anyone or that it was annoying that I changed my mind etc they also deeply discounted the removal slash reprocessing service and i left with a great color that i was more comfortable with for the below reviews where you got home and weren't digging their work give them a call and let them fix it you'll be happy you did can't recommend this place enough no one else

touches my hair these days end of review wow who is this beyonce geez i called and said i wasn't into it and they moved everything aside and several people got me in and fixed my hair wow that's life that's probably once you once you're monogamous and you have two years under your belt and you're yeah committed to them and they have to commit to you that's right that's how that works that's how it works yeah yeah i mean if i get a hair color i don't like um even if it's not my fault i'm just like i love it thanks and then i go home and just live with live with it me too i am i am and if if i want something changed, I will usually go somewhere else. Me too. I'm like, oh, don't worry about it. Except a couple haircuts ago, I got a haircut and I went home and I was dating Allie at the time.

And she was like, holy shit, this is so bad and crooked. And I'm like, what? And it was so it was one of those things where it wasn't a taste thing. She took pictures of the back of my head it was at a slant 100 and i'm are you talking about the bowl cut she was like whoever did this needs to pay i literally thought you were making a long joke about how i cut your hair yeah no christina it was not when you cut my hair into a bowl i was like yeah everyone knew it looked terrible no it was just a normal haircut but they, it was not when you cut my hair into a bowl cut. I was like, yeah, everyone knew it looked terrible. No, it was just a normal haircut.

But it was completely slanted in the back. It actually looked terrible. And I'm like, how did that happen? So I called them and told them, guess what? They worked me in. They're like, so sorry about that. We'll get you and we'll fix it. And it was kind of awkward because I went in and the person who did it wasn't there.

And so someone else did it. And were like who did this and i'm like uh i don't remember of course i remember but i didn't want to like tell on them it was bizarre it was it was like but they were great so i did go back there uh multiple times to that person specifically and the other one was across the salon just like eyeing you no that happened i literally saw the person in there and i was like please don't recognize me please don't recognize me oh no they're like i don't recognize him without that beautiful haircut i gave him back in the day oh my gosh anyway well thank you everybody for listening that was a weird one it felt weird it did feel really weird i kind of i sorry if we

like bummed you all out i feel like kind of bummed out and that's why i'm glad that i could end on more of a positive note i guess thank god you found some good ones actually thank god for me thank god for me thank god for you and your beautiful hair thank you um wow anyway uh you know what y'all can't complain because we just released a between you and us episode a couple days ago so if you haven't listened to it um that's where we read uh reviews that you send in to us via email uh that you find on the internet so go listen to that between you and us is out we started doing it again yes we did for now i just don't want to you know put boxes into a corner uh oh no we're we're not making any promises anymore on the show no we have fun with it it was it was good so we'll

we'll we'll release you know i just realized what when this episode comes out our anniversary is like a few days later oh shit yeah i texted you about that then i forgot again oh yeah whoops whoopsies well all right i have a theme for you xandy and this is fitting i i clicked on a random one and this actually goes back to last week's episode and i'm going to suggest the theme of driving schools. Oh, yes. Oh, my God. Of course. Alexander, this person, Aiden, sent an entire email about their experience with a driving school scam. And I'm going to save this story for next week. Okay. I'm excited. Because it is batshit.

Let me just put it that way. And I'm, like, already so inspired by the story of how to find good reviews. So driving schools. Sweet. Okay. I'm looking forward to that. My challenge comes from Sophie. She, her.

And I want to add a little note. It says under the pronouns, it says, when you guys first started reading the pronouns, she, her, I thought you were saying she, for every single time. And I was confused as to why you had so many siblings.ie she for i mean she her um i never thought of that but sophie said you guys are my top podcast for spotify wrapped and you are all that i listen to my sister has now blocked me out whenever i say the words once in my podcast i feel like that's so my That's in my vocabulary too. Yeah. You say that all the time to me.

You're like, oh, in this one podcast, blah, blah, blah. Here is a challenge. Find a review of a movie based solely on the looks of an actor in the movie. Oh. And it says, this came to me as I am kind of obsessed with one. If you guys would like to know, it's Soda Pop Curtis from The Outsiders. Okay. Whoever that is.

So, I haven't watched The Outsiders. I'm sorry. Me neither. Oh, it's Rob Lowe. Oh. It is Rob Lowe. Wow. He's hunky back then, man.

It says, if you have not yet found this gorgeous human being, please search him up, but maybe don't send the picture to one another or else it will probably spook christine by flashing onto her screen in the middle of the podcast again if rob lowe appears on my screen in the dark i'm not gonna feel good about it uh it doesn't have to be it could be tv too uh okay something like where it's based on the looks i'm excited for that um most of them will probably be about tim allen and or jude law just warning you because they're all your own reviews got it yes oh okay well thanks everybody for listening um we will see you next week for hopefully a less like aggressively whatever that was yes episode weird episode i don't even know the right adjective but um we'll see you next week and uh please

please don't eat any essential oils