Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet - 139: Reviews of Truck Stops

Episode Date: July 28, 2021

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Complete criteria by August 30th, 2024. Visit rbc.com slash student100. Welcome to Beach to Sandy, Water to Wet, a podcast featuring real reviews written by people who just need the world to know what they think. Between you and me, I wanted to like this podcast, but I'd give it zero stars if I could. Hello everybody and welcome to episode 139 of Beach, Sea, Sandy, Water, Too Wet. We are recording this well in advance. Well in, probably the early, is this the earliest we've ever recorded an episode in advance? Maybe, actually, yeah. Because this is not coming out for three weeks.

Yeah, Zanny's going on vacay. Yep. I'm going nowhere. And we are just. But when this comes out. You'll be back, right? Yeah, about. Yeah, I should be back.

Wow. Well, it's been a fun three weeks apart. I assume. I am presuming it was a great time to be across the country from one another. Yes. Well, and actually, it's somewhat relevant because on my way back, I'll probably be stopping at some truck stops. Wow.

What a cool segue that was. I forgot you were driving. Well, I'm flying out and then driving back because I'm getting picked up by our family. I'm having a one-way flight to New York City. Spending time in New York. Sorry, let me write a little quick ditty about that. That sounds like a new day. A one-way flight to New York City.

It sounds like it needs to be a pop song or something. And then 10 days later, getting picked up by my family and they're taking me home. That part's less catchy. It sounds like I failed at what i was trying to do it doesn't work quite out no so i'm going to new york and baltimore and then um just baltimore for a few days after that and then uh getting picked up by the family and we're gonna probably spend a couple days in the areas like east coast somewhere and then drive on back how fun yeah well i hope you have a great time i'll be home okay you have fun thinking about

life yeah thinking about everything what you're missing out on what i'm missing in the world yeah uh and until then we can talk about shark stops uh who do we know who sent this in no i came prepared last week through the magic of pa the pause button which we only recently discovered much to all of your chagrin i was able to find it and uh it is a theme from jay but not really because jay didn't mean for it to be a theme oh i just saw it and you know what they just sent something i think and it said indirectly jay truck stop flying jay is what i call him i don't even know who it is so jay i don't even know if those are your proper pronouns. I apologize.

I just remember that J is the only letter. Wow, you came prepared. I thought I did and then suddenly it unraveled right before my eyes. Do you have the challenge? Do you know what our challenge is today? I did. I have the challenge. I know that.

That's why I didn't come prepared for that okay the challenge was given by you but was it also given by someone else let me pause and we're back and uh fittingly alexander figured it out it was from grace so thank you grace um so and the challenge was to find i said fittingly and then i didn't even say what the challenge was the challenge was to find a review of a place of worship where the reviewer thought it was a different religion so we have that and we have chuck stops what a combo uh do you want to go first you want me to um i'll i'll hop in here all right maybe i should take over for really i thought i was doing really well with Is that okay with you?

We're doing our best. Here is a review. I didn't say that. Okay, geez. I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt because I know I'm doing my best. All right. This is a review of Newell Truck Plaza in Newton, Kansas. This is one star by Tony. Wanted to try the German sausage at the trucker bar.

$9.29. They needed my full half hour break to serve me a plate with a little kind of bratwurst. Nothing German at all about it. Two eggs and some hash browns. And when I wanted to pay, nobody took notice. All in all, horror. End of review. If that's what you call horror, you've had a...

Also, I didn't know... Charmed life. I'm kind of surprised that this person says they got a bratwurst and then said there's nothing German about it. Yeah, I think they did that because it was small. But like, isn't a Vienna sausage also really small? Which I guess isn't... Would that be...

A German thing, but... It would be either Austrian or neither. Yeah. But no no they got a problem they said they got something that's like a bratwurst and they're like that's not german at all but what of course the bratwurst is true i don't understand what did they order on a different page here you and i no i think i get it they ordered quote the german sausage so then they got a bratwurst and we're like what the hell is this yeah they're like this isn't german i thought it was so small and they were like it wasn't even german okay they just said nothing german about it even though also nine well at

first i thought nine dollars for a german sausage sausage two eggs and some hash browns yeah i was like you get a whole meal with it it's not like they just rolled one onto a plate yeah i don't know yeah regardless i don't think you really should be criticizing the sausages at the newell truck plaza newton kansas that was the first sentence that i mean i think i just blurted out because i couldn't contain myself my reaction when you said i wanted to try the sausage at the truck i guess you're i mean if you're driving a truck there are only so many places you can stop to eat with that truck. Yeah, I guess if you're tired of Wendy's or whatever. Yeah, you want to get something.

Wait, yeah, you probably can't stop at Wendy's, huh? Well, you parked your truck. So, yeah, I'm sure. We're going to get a lot of emails in this episode. Yeah, yeah. I apologize. We clearly know so much about truck driving. I do follow some truck drivers on TikTok, which is one of my favorite things to do.

Yes, they're really great. I feel like that would be a cool corner of TikTok to be in. Well, you should look into it. Thank you. I am cool. That's not what I said. So I have an email here from Emily who says, here's some reviews I found about the Iowa 80 truck stop, which is apparently the world's largest truck stop.

Wow. And this person this review sounds stressful oh like if this were like world's largest rocking chair i'd be like oh yay that sounds like a fun visit world's largest truck stop i'm stressed and i want to stay very far away think about how many potential yeah there's just a lot of potential things that could go awry um it's just too many things for me if it's one large thing that's different but at the large truck stop that means more people more showers sure you know more sausages just a lot um so this person has a two greatest fears i guess here i am saying it's just too much stuff and the two things you come up with are sausage and showers he like hisses whenever it's like rabies like whenever

water comes near or meat he's a vegan that's true um that sounds like a fun riddle vegan with rabies is the answer okay this is a three-star review and it's by a reviewer with like a ridiculous texas name so i'm not gonna say it but i'm gonna call them texas gal okay a ridiculous texas name is a name that you just associate with someone from texas no like she put like yeehaw howdy something like that it's like she put some like sass into it and i'm like i'm just gonna call her texas gal so i don't 10 gallon heidi ho howdy last 10 gallon howdy ho instead of heidi i'll get it 10 gallon howdy ho last is actually how did you figure that out that's amazing thank you this is a three-star view by 10 gallon howdy ho last

perfect that's stupid so we had an issue with the shower last night. The hot water surged and literally scalded my husband. He has blisters on his scalp and back and the unprofessional way the situation was handled last night. We came in and spoke to Scott this morning. He was great and he put us in contact with his boss. We were assured that this would be handled and expect it to be. On a second note, we own a small trucking company. We wanted to get two hats made. First off, the girl behind the counter was a rude little beep. It just is a bunch of asterisks. Okay.

I was going to say, since when do we censor ourselves here? I'm not censoring anybody. Okay. I want to make that very clear, haters. I'm not censoring anybody. I'm just saying it says a bunch of stars and I'm assuming it says Biatch, but I'm not sure. Was a rude little beep. We were informed that our company logo could not be printed.

Do you have a... Oh, wait. Let me read the name of it and then you can guess why. The company name is Southern Pits Express LLC. Is it just an armpit? I'm sorry, this is extremely inappropriate, ma'am. We cannot print this on an embroidery machine. So Southern Pits?

Yeah, P-I-T-T-S. I don't know why it's called that. Oh, my next guess was something about a peach pit. No, it doesn't really have to do much with the name. Is it an eagle ripping someone's throat open or something really dramatic not quite um our logo contains a confederate battle flag jesus christ we were also informed that we could not use the mississippi state flag either does that have the confederate used to i think they've recently changed it so she's saying oh

this was a work a loophole i found was to use the Mississippi flag. And then they said no. Okay. So basically, it's not about their actual logo. They really just want to... They don't want to print the Confederate flag. Yeah. Well, and no, but this person, they're upset that they can't use the battle flag specifically

because if they're willing to change their logo by adding a mississippi flag instead of the right good point good point good point that happens wait good point it's not like they've already had this logo like do you trademark or patent a logo i forget i don't ask our lawyer that we paid money to do that i suppose we did we did i think pay someone to do that you trademark i think a patent is more for an idea like an invention. Which you claim to have many patents. So I'm very surprised that you don't have knowledge of the difference if you claim to have many of both of them. Well, you didn't even hear what I just said.

You said something about Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and it's probably disrespectful, so I ignored it. What are they called? Who? The Ruth Bader Ginsburg machine. christina are you serious right now at first i thought you're trying to say funko pop or something like uh you're talking about those machines the rube goldberg machine the ones that rube goldberg that have a bunch of steps to them ruth ginsburg rube goldberg the fact that

ruth peter ginsburg machine oh my gosh so that's what i'm just what i'd be a fan of one of those two thank you to be fair but i patented it you're very wrong rube goldberg was already taken yeah okay so point being you're right clearly they don't have like a set logo already because they're like well we'll change it it's like well okay we'll just slap on the mississippi flag instead yeah we'll like add stuff to it yeah it makes no sense okay got it got it got it here we go we were informed that our company logo cannot be printed the company name which by the way i don't see how that's relevant, is Southern Pits

Express LLC. Our logo contains a Confederate battle flag. We were also informed that we could not use the Mississippi state flag either. I did explain to my husband that due to the fact that we are from the South, representing our state and our heritage makes us dirty racists. The girl did not dispute nor apologize for the fact that they couldn't help us with order. So evidently being from Mississippi and from the South makes us dirty racists and Iowa 80 doesn't want our business. End of review. Like nobody said that. Yeah, exactly. I was about to say they are saying that, but they're telling on themselves right now. Like that's like a, you should like look inward at why you keep using that phrase then nobody ascribed to you except yourself yeah

they say oh we can't use that symbol gosh i told my husband how dirty of a racist he was it's like wait wait wait are we being serious here or yeah probably yeah sounds like you both are uh-huh do you also like that i didn't give their name and then i immediately told the name of the company so like what was the point of that but i have no idea i have no idea that is wild though so at least they are okay i will say this at least they are actually from mississippi um and they're not just are they that's what they said because we're from mississippi so at least that so i see why they would want to use a mississippi flag but um maybe now they can use the new one okay like i looked them up and they definitely don't have like their logo does not seem to have a confederate flag in it so i don't know where they're probably just wanted a

reason to be upset and they probably just wanted a confederate flag hat and couldn't get one any other way yeah okay anyway to resort to reaching out to a truck stop to have them make one for them no those are on amazon you're right i have a feeling there are other ways you can go about getting one of those uh especially if you're from mississippi um i assume that that would be a place where you could buy some i mean i've seen them in downtown nashville yeah so i went to remember that time i got in trouble because i found a snuggie that had a an eagle like carrying a confederate flag and i put that up on instagram i was like i was it was like sarcastically sarcastically clearly sarcastically and then these people were like i can't believe you're sharing the conf and i was like it's a Snuggie I found in a truck stop.

Like, I'm not saying this is my new outfit. Anyway. Anyway. Anyway. Anyway. Let me move on to Montana. Okay. Because we're going to the Town Pump.

Oh, God. Sorry. It's called Town Pump Flying J Truck Stop. And who else would hang out there other than Swamp Girl 69? No. Who has this to say? One stop. Is that really their name?

Yeah. Well, I was wondering if you kind of gave a similar moniker. No, I couldn't change this one. This one was too perfect. No, you couldn't ever. Plus, it's my own. So it's not like I'm revealing anyone's information because this is my review. Oh, right.

Of course. Because I am Swamp Girl 69. That's right. I forgot it. I thought you were Swamp Girl 420, but that's the other one. I've grown. You've evolved. Now that I'm an adult.

Here we go. I'm going to read the first half. It's all caps, and I'll just do the first half. Oh, boy. They are under construction. This place is confusing. No restrooms, and they have portal pots outside end of review portal pots oh god remember last in last week's episode that we recorded an hour ago uh when i

mentioned uh all these typos that i'm including i like how i was like i don't remember whatever you're about to say i'm just saying i i'm trying to embrace the ones where people make clearly make mistakes you mean quickly like quickly and uh guag um and now portal portal portal pots no portal pots portal pots see it's a very very essential uh aspect of these reviews that you keep that you keep that in there yeah because this wouldn't be funny if it said porta potties it might not be funny with portal pots except to me is excellent and i feel if you say it really fast without thinking it sounds almost like an ice cream like a portal pop pot pop no now since i know since i know what you're saying since i know what you're saying i cannot think of it because i know they're talking about a porta potty and i know the words are portal pots so you're right there's no way i can associate

with that that was something that goes in my mouth so you're right you're right you're right okay this is another one of that same place let's see uh the iowa 80 truck stop from emily this is a three-star review by jacob haven't been yet but headed that way for the night reviewing simply to communicate with drivers not driving trucks no pickups and rvs don't count either truck drivers have it bad enough with fighting four-wheelers on the highways but to have to share a truck stop with you is over the top. Then you have the nerve to leave disparaging reviews. We don't have the luxury of whipping into any store or restaurant we see.

We need at least 11 feet wide and 70 foot long parking spaces. Prices are almost always inflated. Guess we can afford it, huh? And then I've got you and your kids on a family road trip in the way literally we only have rest and truck stops available if you have such a problem with truck stop parking give me a break and the high prices guess what stop somewhere else leave crappy reviews on another locale's info page it doesn't make you feel welcome at a truck stop wonder why it's not for you. Don't get me

started on RVs. Parked where a driver who has been driving 11 hours should be parked getting his 10 mandated rest break? Rest areas are for you. This place seems so awesome and to have bad reviews simply because a four-wheeler doesn't get it is a shame. End of review.

How many stars did they give? Three. Why didn't they give five? That pisses me off because I kind of agree with them. They're defending this business complaining about these reviewers that don't understand the purpose of a truck stop. They are being very gatekeep-y

along the way, but of all things the gatekeep is probably the worst. These portal pots are only for me. But why give three stars? What? You're complaining that other people are giving bad reviews. You give a three. You know, that's not a good positive review.

Three thumbs up. So people apparently are on board with this. I read plenty of reviews similar to that about truck drivers complaining because they're yeah not getting the truck stop experience that they expect and mainly because of people like me who loves going who love going to truck stops oh how quaint a truck's not quaint they're just the best bathrooms they have the best uh it's really that's why they have the best bathrooms always no i don't use the showers at truck stops don't worry everybody don't worry nothing wrong with that i'd do that no i don't think you're allowed to i think it's just for truckers since you just pay money i thought

oh i thought they were like very clearly you sounded very condescending there no no i meant it i get it now i get it now no no no at the time i was like yikes we might need to edit that one out oh god no i will i don't even shower i haven't showered in five days i just said that earlier I get it now. I get it now. No, no, no. At the time, I was like, yikes, we might need to edit that one out. Oh, God, no. I don't even shower. I haven't showered in five days. I just said that earlier before we recorded. No, what I'm saying is I don't utilize trucker services to my advantage if I have the opportunity

to go to a motel or something. That makes a lot of sense. Sorry, sorry. You're like, don't worry, everybody. My God, I'm going to get like, I don't know. No, no, no. Can you imagine if i got canceled because i said i would wouldn't shower at a truck stop and then i had to go on

like an apology tour and say no i love showering at truck stops and it would just be such a mess anyway oh my god that's not what i'm doing for your youtube channel i was basically talking to jacob here and saying like don't worry i don't invade your space in that way. I don't know all the etiquette. I don't either. The one thing I do know is mom would drive. She would commute from Cincinnati to Dayton to teach. And so I was actually going there at the same time. So we'd drive together some days and we'd stop at the pilot along the way. And she had her Fillmore is her giant coffee mug. She'd bring it in, get it refilled.

But a lot of the truck drivers, how it works is they get tokens. So if they pay enough money, they get free coffee or things like that. Yeah, sure, sure, sure. So they would use their free coffee on mom if they didn't drink coffee or had already had a coffee for the day. So she said almost every time she would stop there on the way to work um there would be a driver who kindly offer her a free coffee because they aren't going to use it well and then she's they saw she was in a prius outside and we're like forget about it give that back no um she also incidentally used to drive a 18 wheeler briefly i believe but she did so we could probably ask her about some of

this stuff i'm not really sure some of the etiquette uh because yeah i don't know it is a it does explain why every time we go to like a truck stop or gas station she starts screaming anyone in an rv or pickup truck she starts screaming like to get out of the way well also used to that trucker life she used to live she's like and then she realizes she's in her tiny priusy um she's like oh never mind i'm not in my truck anymore sorry I get lost in the memories sometimes I have seen cars and pickup trucks what? you said it like I have seen cars and I was like the movie?

I thought you meant the movie fun fact I have never seen the movie Cars are you for real? I saw it in theaters I haven't seen that let's get this out of the way I haven't seen Bee Movie there's so many movies that people have been really upset me for not watching get out i've seen that one okay all right okay but anyway so i've seen cars uh and pickup trucks parked in the the 18 wheeler uh like the long long spots yeah and i can't believe people that's bad that's

really bad there's shit like that i just why that's the kind of commentary i met with the showers like i don't take your space yeah i don't know all the etiquette but that's very clearly something you're not supposed to be doing yeah so anyway but so i get it to a point jacob i mean i i think it's wild that your review you're writing a review on your way like he literally said i'm headed there for the night i'm writing this to communicate with drivers like nobody's gonna communicate with that i don't think i mean who knows but maybe we're spreading the word now they must have just read one too many negative review and they were just so upset they would basically they would love our podcast although

i do disagree with the whole three-star thing perhaps not anymore maybe i don't know this episode might turn them off true true true anyway your turn uh i have another one of the town pump flying j truck stop this is also billings montana uh this is by joanne one star no flag end of review this is what i'm saying i mean this is what happened in that last episode i was talking about bucky's like not being american or something that's when and i said oh i have a review for the next episode like that that's the one do they just drive around looking for flags yes christina this person this is one of two reviews oh not too many but one of two reviews that they left i would say they left another place i believe it was also in montana a completely different

truck stop no it was a truck stop as well for some reason um and yeah no other reviews mentioning flags but they both said no flag and there are two separate locations oh boy oh boy um yeah i guess people it's just weird weird weird weird weird thing cares can you imagine though if they went inside and saw they were serving german sausages they probably have a conniption. No, they'd probably love that shit. That's the thing. It makes no sense.

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Taco Bell, not just late night. Offer available at participating Taco Bell locations or TacoBell.ca. Okay, so I have one more thatily sent in of the same truck stop this i-80 there were some gems i'm telling you so uh let's see this one is from hank it's also a three star okay so uh this kind of is just in response to i guess guess, everything, all of the above. Three stars. It's just a truck stop. Get over it. End of review.

Amen. I guess. I guess, Hank. I'm just kidding. Honestly, I don't get any of these reviews on both ends. It's like when people say, why are you wasting time, blah, blah, blah blah blah it's like you're the one on the internet writing a review about it yeah you took time out of your day to do this like yeah exactly like you're clearly not over it hank if you're on here writing reviews about it exactly

yeah good point um but i don't know but then again the way the way we talk and think about german truck stops we act like they're the most interesting things in the world i mean that's kind of how i talk about buckies too i'm like wow it's amazing and i bet people are like oh my god it's like yeah we get it you know move on i get it i get it i think it was marilyn or d who sent i think it was marilyn who sent um a tiktok and it was making fun of that whole thing and it was the buck is an outrage it was someone going into like a 7-eleven but acting like oh my god look at these fun american things and it was like just really basic stuff so it was that same vibe that i had

when i was in indonesia and i was like wow this stuff is so cool but there it's just like oh this is just our stuff how we drink water and then so someone made um like a satirical version of someone like an american store doing the same thing that pointed out i mean i've seen enough of our cousins and people not our cousins but people do that here and it's actually quite fascinating i do that yeah in germany those truck stops though those truck stops are special still the gas no they are the rest stops i mean the rest stops because they literally you can buy things with your name on them but okay it's the only place francisca can and my mom can find things with their names because they're so wild like they would never be in an american one but they sell i mean like every type of thing with your name it's not just like oh key chains it's like the little prince mugs with your name on it like it's the most random assortment and then all these wild things like they sell kegs there too yeah kegs of alcohol

of course um and then giant bottles of wine just they don't sell german sausages weirdly enough just they definitely sell plenty of those uh yeah and they're fun and they have uh they have uh slot machines yes yes it's always a little sad because people are just they're fun, and they have slot machines. Yes, yes. It's always a little sad because people are just there playing them forever and ever. That sums it up, but they're fun, and I highly recommend them. You do have to pay to use the bathroom, but that's okay. True, and then you get money back that you can spend at the rest stop then. For a little cola.

It's like 75 cent or something for a little cola or a mezzo mix or something mezzo mix yum yum yum yum what whose turn is it your turn okay arrowhead travel plaza this is in pendleton oregon this is a one-star review by katherine sorry to hear that the travel center will no longer carry trump merchandise thought this plaza was a fun place to go turns out it is biased along with agreeing to enforce the world is flat science masks do not prevent covet 19 they actually cause cross-contamination a spit-covered mask you touch and touch anything else is contaminated barf emojis won't be spending my money there anymore end of review why are you touching the

spit covered mask you're wearing yeah why is the spit covered i think the spit would stay on the inside so why are you touching the inside i don't think that's how it does also they don't have trump merchandise must be biased as if they have i know it's painful biden merchandise like anti-trump merchandise i don't know probably not is what i would assume but oh yikes um and i love i was like i thought this was a fun place to go but now that they specifically don't have trump merchandise not fun for me anymore make me plaster my spitty mask to my own face i mean for god's people are sake. People are wild. The spit-covered mask causes cross-contamination. What did they say about flat Earth?

That was the most confusing part. Yeah, I don't really get that. Along with agreeing to enforce, I-N-F-O-R-C-E. Sure, sure, sure. To enforce the world is flat, science, capital M masks do not prevent COVID-19. So I'm not sure. this sounds a little bit dare i say like rambling um you did dare which i'm impressed you dared to go there but so i'm not sure why they're enforcing both that the world is flat are they enforcing that behavior too like is that i don't know and enforcing that behavior too? Like, is that... I don't know. And enforcing...

This truck stop is enforcing science? God forbid. It makes no sense to me. Makes no sense to me. Well, I do love that these people are just, like... First of all, I also, like, at the beginning, I meant to comment, too, that she said, sad to hear that this place will no longer...

Like, is there a newsletter that they're subscribed to? Like, how did they even find this out? They probably went in for their weekly Trump merchandise haul that they're subscribed to? How did they even find this out? They probably went in for their weekly Trump merchandise haul that they wanted, and then there weren't any. And could you imagine the employee at the other end of that having to be asked why the store no longer carries Trump merchandise? Probably over and over by lots of people. And they have to say probably a million times, I have no fucking clue.

I do not make these decisions minimum wage here ma'am oh man stop spitting on me put your manager on jesus stop touching your spitty mask gross lady i'm so annoyed about that like don't make it sound like we're all spitting in our mask weirdo you're the only one doing that this doesn't god i'm so annoyed point and stop touching things like you shouldn't be doing that anyway god okay i don't know why i'm so mad like i didn't think a mask thing could make me mad anymore i know i thought we were yeah i just thought it just got to me i just thought it was kind of goofy that they were so upset about this it was 11 months ago who knows i that's that's why i brought it to the table it doesn't feel very current so i thought it was more funny i mean it's very sad obviously but i don't know

because like don't say don't say i know what you're thinking don't say it i was thinking the same thing from laura don't say this is an email from laura uh who's sent in a review you're not gonna like laura pretty soon but for now you will you know it's weird because i actually like most people who write one-star reviews no laura's the emailer oh oh i'm i'm just okay to be fair i really don't like most of the people who email right to be clear yeah yeah we have very strong opinions um no so laura emailed me and she well she emailed us but um i think this is more directed at me the first we'll just we'll just ease in with a review that she sent and this is a review of porky's truck stop at south of the border which is apparently like a famous place and it's um in south carolina

on i-95 and i guess if you drive down toward, you drive down that highway, people stop at it. So this is a review by Flora and it's a one-star review. Did you say Flora? Yeah. Was it sent in by Laura?

Oh. I literally saw FL in the username. It just went with Flora. I took a moment to think, wait, Laura, wait, Flora. No, I said Flora and I thought, how the hell did she come up with Flora for a name? Oh, Laura. Remember that time when we both had the same reviewer back to back and we accidentally figured it out even though we both made up a name for them and it was just Z?

And it was just Z. Okay, how about Francis? Flora was good. Flora.. And it was just Z. And it was just Z. Okay. How about Francis? Flora was good. Flora. Okay. It's Flora. It's Flora.

I was just curious. You're not going to like Flora soon anyway. Okay. I don't have... Well, okay. One star by Flora. Review of South of the Border. So I got a TripAdvisor account just to rate this place.

That's how bad it is. So this place looks like the abandoned town in the movie Wax Museum. First of all, the signs hype it up. The signs were the best part of the experience. We stopped at the restaurant by the gas station. Dimly lit, smells like mothballs. I immediately question everyone sitting down's sanity. They had the audacity to walk into this outdated trap and actually order? What? Anyway, I had to take a bathroom break. It was the main reason I was there. The gas station attendant told me it was behind the building. Here's a tip.

Pee in a cup in your car. It's a better experience. Trust me. After I hovered the pubic-covered toilet seat and tiptoed through the pee, I went to wash my hands. Two women sitting in folding chairs, folding their arms, were just chilling in the bathroom. No uniforms. I thought they were homeless what is happening anyway i look at the counter and there's a tip jar eureka tips for what which cracks me up because we're just talking about

those german ones where they actually do expect you to tip when they're but but they're very clean like they it's like a job yeah um so i just love i my my dream is that these two ladies just show up and sit down yeah and like put a jar out i mean we should just try that one day it's like not a bad idea i mean it is a bad idea well we'll test out we'll see how much it makes us and might probably zero yeah oh we should at least go somewhere where the bathrooms are clean and it looks like... Oh, true. You know what I mean? Anyway, I look at the counter and there's a tip jar. Eureka!

Tips? For what? I could urinate in a prison and have a better experience. Totally uncalled for. And the tip jar just added to the experience. Really? A tip jar in a bathroom in the middle of nowhere? And a dirty one at that.

Blew my mind. I don't know who owns this joint, but it needs to be cleaned up so uncalled for my boyfriend and i ran to our car after a man warned us to get to safety we ran past the gas station and there was literally feces on the wall this is my first time ever taking the time out to complain and warn people not to go here this place needs to be condemned end of review get to safety i know so that's when i was like oh this is a gross review and then all of a sudden it escalated so quickly to like we ran to our car past feces covered walls a man told us to get to safety i couldn't figure out what happened but i thought wow this really upped the ante here yeah that took a turn especially because it was quite delicately worded earlier

with uh tiptoeing through the the p um hovering i feel like it's like pubic either a script that's been dropped and they lost a page by accident and we like missed yes that might be it or like the drama teacher whoever is like you really need to work on your build-up like this just went like from zero to 60 yeah in five seconds um because i mean the two women were just chilling and then all of a sudden this man lawn chairs right yeah and folding chairs folding oh folding chairs folding their arms too that is that is an image wow get to safety which i'm like what like get out of the bathroom get to safety and you just run and there's feces covered walls like what the man was probably

making fun of you for being so freaked out in that place for like crying in the bathroom or something yeah well I've done that a lot but well I mean you just have to be more subtle about it okay your turn I don't dislike Laura after that that was pretty that Oh, don't worry.

We're not there yet. What? There's more from Laura? Yeah. And it's my turn? Oh, dear God. Sorry. I thought, oh, that wasn't so bad, Laura.

That was a great one. Good job. No, no, no. It was good. Yeah. I wish I had found that myself. That's the only reason I'm unhappy with you. You found a good one, Laura.

Anyway, I hope we don't find anything else out. Nope. My next one is of Jubbets Truck Stop. Sure. Which I thought was a, I Googled it and I think it's the only location in Portland, Oregon. Or it's just a Portland thing. You don't say it's not a chain. Huh?

You don't say it's not a chain called Jubbets. I mean, there's some weird, I don't know. There's some weird ones, but yeah, apparently Jubbets, I think, might only have one location. So this is a one star by Mallory. I cannot believe the experience I just had at the deli from an employee named Jen. She was violent, rude, and a complete gerk. She refused to... Oh, wait.

This can't be happening. It's happening again. You're kidding with me it's g-e-r-k is how they spelled it g-e-r it's a gerk this can't be real there's guag last week we had wickley guag and quickly now we have gerk uh-huh it's a thing i don't know what's going on in the world also when they did employee named jen it was a gen they put through no they put threes in not for every e though so it's m e m p l o y three e and then n a m three d named named yeah what and then j three n n. Named Jen Jubbets. That's why she's so rude.

She's the owner's daughter. Jen Jubbets. And then spelled violent. V-I-O-L-A-N-T. Jen Jubbets. Violent. Violent. Violent.

She was violent, rude, and a complete gherk. She refused to give me my complimentary drink after I had spent $200 in her establishment. She cussed and called me out. She then kept my money and refused to give Knit back. My father was a trucker and went to Jubbets since I was a little girl. I've been going for years now. I will never go again. End of review.

Response from owner. Mallory. Jen Jubbets Sr. Jen Jubbets Sr. Mallory. No senior. go again end of review response from owner mallory jen jubbitt senior jen jubbitt's here mallory no senior oh jen jubbitt senior oh my lord jen jubbitt senior jen jubbitt is not here jen jubbitt senior here mallory the oregon lottery requires an id to cash out and we have this policy posted in our video lottery rooms we requested you to leave because of your behavior toward our employees who are enforcing this policy while we try to be accommodating to our customers when we can we are required to follow oregon lottery policies and we do not tolerate behavior that makes our employees feel unsafe thank you and

so i like that standing up for jen but also like what you said literally didn't happen lady like what are you talking oh yeah it's a completely fascinating how they turn these stories into such like no wonder people are able to kind of build their own worldview i mean all of us but like it's amazing how people misremember like create like a whole narrative that's like oh i didn't get my complimentary drink and they're like you were like harassing an employee about the lottery someone someone got into an i got into an art like we talked about this i get into an argument with someone on reddit and they make up this whole story about me um cheating on my wife with a woman in a bar in north carolina and you were like i've never been to north i've never been

married i've never been in north carolina i don't know what the fuck that was about bananas they left a one-star review on the podcast and it's just a weird smear thing i don't know why it's sick so nonsensical and it had nothing to do with the argument i there was just no reason for it it wasn't even a joke for the it was just a one-star review they were like calling me out for something that never actually happened that never did anyway so yeah so that's people are weird i mean also before i knew this was about the lotto i really liked the notion that you could just say oh she wouldn't give me my complimentary drink like i could be like yeah she wouldn't give me my complimentary fritos and they're like they're not complimentary see like she's not giving them to me like I feel like you could call anything complimentary and make that argument yeah but what you spent two

hundred dollars at this gas station allegedly gambling I guess I don't know that's the thing yeah so they they wanted and maybe they want a drink or I don't know like what do you mean after I spent 200 i can't imagine the lottery's like here's a free margarita you won the lottery but i don't what do i know i have no idea how this works jubbets is his own plan what do i know fair fair um so laura's back not to be confused with flora and laura alexander maybe you should get to safety i'm so nervous christina why is there feces on your wall? It just appeared.

Alexander, when did I get into this folding chair? Oh, no. I'm not putting any tips in that filthy jar. Come on. No, no, no. Okay. So Laura says, I also stumbled across the trucker's report. No. So Laura says, I also stumbled across the Truckers Report.

No. I know that Christine loves a good forum. And although it's no cool cruisers, it has a ton of truck stop threads. Hopefully you can get some solid material for the theme. And I was kind of like yesterday, like really tired. I was like, oh, I'll just glance at it. And oh my God, I fell into another rabbit hole. Laura did this to me. I'm nervous for the lingo well we had eek and uh dear husband and dear wife i'm really annoyed we don't dhdw

those don't exist here and it's here's another i'm i'm i'm not trying to be mean to to truckers but when i think of what kind of lingo they'd have they'd have like ol my old lady old lady yeah that's what they were definitely old lady talk here i love some good old lady talk that's a patreon bonus episode actually it's called our old lady segment old lady talk segment so this is the first forum that came up when I clicked on the link. And it's called Truck Stops Going Downhill by Iron Man Wife. Pepper Pots? My Marvel knowledge is limited.

Oh, you mean Portal Pots. Portal Pots! Oh, that's funny. Okay. Here's the first post. Hubby is in truck stop in ohio no breakfast food all the mcdonald's subways don't open till 11 toilets are nasty no paper they can't find people to work soon trucker is gonna stay home too response from jason 2407 yeah why work the feds

have made it more profitable to stay home and smoke dope and fornicate and live on unemployment or welfare. Sad but true. You wish you could just stay home, smoke pot and fornicate, loser. If it were that profitable. Exactly. Everyone wants that. What are you doing, Jason?

Then you're an idiot for continuing to drive a truck if it's so profitable. And also don't look down on other people. Maybe look at your employers for like what that makes no sense there was uh i didn't i'm not gonna obviously not gonna read this whole well not obviously it's something i've been known to do but i'm not gonna read the whole forum like back and forth but there was somebody um who literally said like well um and to be clear like not everybody was on this person's side like there was a varied response to this yeah but um somebody argued back with him and basically said like well i mean employees can't work if like they're not given jobs

or they're not given you know a living wage or whatever and then somebody else some other guy responded like well it's so sad that nowadays money is more important than work ethic and i'm like what are you talking about that makes no sense so i want to go work at mcdonald's for work ethic even though i don't get paid well it's just a bizarre argument so anyway then on the thread of course i found my new friend and his name is flat earth trucker um and i clicked on flat earth trucker and it said you must have an account to check out this person's profile so you created one i created a flat earth trucker to A flat earth trucker? To see flat earth trucker. I needed to see more.

Jesus Christ. So I created an account. I'm not telling you my username. Please tell me your username. No. Christina, we're going to find out eventually. I actually don't remember. I'm pretty sure I just said some random... How could you possibly come to this podcast saying you made an account

on a trucker blog and not tell us the name of the account that you made this is so you know it you're just embarrassed originally i was gonna make it domed earth trucker and then i was like that's too stupid so i think i wrote oh i looked around my office and i said and i saw that um moon crystal shelf and i wrote seeing stars and that's my username i don't know it'll probably blend in because no one's gonna see that and it's generic very doesn't really mean anything i don't have that username for any other platform seeing stars oh my right like it's random enough it is very random so seeing stars went on a little mission a little recon mission and i went to find flat earth trucker and wow does he have a robust profile so flat earth trucker one of the

most recent comments here it's like a gun or a knife trucks don't kill people drivers or other drivers kill people that was an argument he made what i don't know i don't know but i love that the gun talk came right into play and it i mean what does that have anything to do with trucks right now okay i don't know what the original thread was so the original thread i believe was about like something dangerous happening with a truck like um like an accident happened and it's like who's at fault is it, like, is it something faulty with the truck? Is it the driver? And he said, it's like a gun.

And it's like, no, it's not. Nobody brought guns into this except you. That's a very different thing. Like you're the only one who's talking about guns here. Okay. Huh. And so then here's another discussion with someone that Flat Earth Trucker had. He says, well, find water, not in a container that has curvature can't be done no curvature of

the earth visible from any altitude without a fisheye lens water always flows downward yet on the globe earth model rivers would necessarily have to flow upwards on the sides of the globe end of comment what that makes no sense you You don't say. What the fuck? Wait, the... What? Okay. Wait, wait, wait, wait. So they're saying there's no curvature in a body of water that you look at. Yes, unless it's in a container.

Which, what? Okay. That makes no sense. And they're like, unless it's from a fisheye lens. So that's not true, though. I mean, obviously. I'm sorry. It bothers me. I'm just... Well, I think he's saying if you're looking out at the ocean, it's not true though i mean obviously i'm sorry i it bothers me i'm just well i think he's saying if you're looking out at the ocean it's not round which is like what well but it is okay i'm sorry like i don't know what to tell you how do you explain a ship coming up in its

mass like like that was the original view of a ship coming from a distance and you see it coming over the horizon over the horizon have you even heard about all the shit nasa makes up unfortunately that's part of it probably i've heard lots i've heard lots of shit i think maybe that's part of it so what if this person goes into a hot air balloon and okay i don't know if a hot air balloon is a good example but you know or those weather balloons put your own camera that's not a fisheye lens and throw it up in a weather balloon. They do that, and they still say it's not. No, I know, but this person would probably say, oh, they must be using a fisheye lens. So this person should do their own. No, but I feel like flat earthers do that, and then they're like, see?

And they like have some... Weird explanation. Yeah. Yes, no, it's true. I've seen, there's a flat earth documentary that I enjoy. Yes, that's the one I watched. And yeah, at the end, they literally proved the the flat earthers proved the earth is not flat in their own demonstration they prove there's curvature because they use those lasers and they did a whole thing

and they made an excuse for why and then they said oh but that's blah blah blah that's yeah exactly it's explained away by a new total move shift of the goal and a lot of times it's because the government and nasa are lying which is like well you can't really argue against or so also water flows downward yet on the globe earth model okay uh rivers would necessarily have to flow upwards okay like what are you talking about so then here's another forum not a for another form another thread you're right i hate this i don't know sorry this is i mean i'm not sorry but like i'm sorry that laura did this i'm blaming laura so sandy ego wrote that's funny i know wrote this forum is

full of horrible people every time someone makes topic, there are multiple people who respond just to insult or argue with the OP. Original poster. If you have something you are mad about, resolve the problem. If you can't resolve the problem, find a healthy outlet for your anger. Arguing and insulting people is not a healthy outlet. I'm posing this as a formal complaint. This forum is rancid. Please clean it up.

Okay, so that's the end of the start of the thread. You can imagine how well this went. So this is a response from RB Boomer. A-R-B-Y? No! Like the chain? RB's Boomer? No.

Just, I changed the letters around. It was like L-G Boomer. I don't know, something. RB Boomer. It is just truck people get used to it you should hear what they're saying about you on the cb and oh my god that's so they're literally on these forums while talking to each other gossiping oh my this is wild i mean i think that's gotta be a joke right or do you think they're actually talking i don't know i don't know i thought that was a joke like it might be that's hilarious which either way is very funny

now cowboy tim responded well now aren't you just a bright ray of sunshine let me offer you a nice cool refreshing glass of cherry kool-aid with it like an r registered oh trademark or whatever that r stands for yeah so that's odd that was odd what kind of what does that mean idea no clue and then flat earth trucker responded i want your cherry kool-aid plenty of ice please what is that, that at least seemed somewhat innocent. It seemed condescending, but... It seemed innocent and very sinister at the same time.

Yeah, exactly. And I can't decide which it is. Like, I... Is it a Jim... Jim Jones reference? They didn't say Flavor Aid. Now, if they said Flavor Aid,

there would clearly be a reference. We're going to massacre you? Like, I don't know. Yeah, they want to poison this person. I mean, the Flat Earth earth trucker they're like yeah i want some of the kool-aid like yeah yeah i don't know so then uh here's a response from that same thread by no exit you know what they say go ahead and scream like a woman hitchhiker

what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck did you report this to the police i got on my cb radio and i said i have a formal complaint to make no that's why seeing stars made a thread and said i have a formal complaint and i'm making it right here on this forum this is how oh my god and also no exit that's their username and then their photo is like a sign that says no exit so it's like very alarming already um you know what they say go ahead and scream like a woman hitchhiking to new orleans for marty gron disappears forever this is so scary this is so so so terrifying there's more no there's not christina this is terrifying they shouldn't be allowed

it's terrifying like like a woman hitchhiking to new orleans for marty grand disappears forever go ahead and scream no one will hear you parentheses bad humor i'm i'm relieved a little a little a tad bit relieved i think that's like a liability thing like he's like just for the my future court date that i know is coming i have to say this is a joke maybe but i feel like if you're truly like psychopath a true psychopath you wouldn't even bother putting that um oh my god at least they admitted it's bad humor um like nobody that is wild like it went on for several more pages not one person acknowledged that comment um so that's a very scary thought so flat earth trucker also commented on this thread again after

the kool-aid thing and wrote this site isn't rancid it's just right and then posted a meme of jack nicholson you can't handle the truth so there's the picture yeah it says people think i go out of my way to piss them off trust me it's not out of my way at all oh my god so that is the end of the forum digging that i did i'm glad the scary thing is i i it's so clear that you very barely scratched the surface like literally went through maybe two threads and then was like this is enough for today this is um it's alarming yeah it's alarming i mean just the whole marty girl thing is so bad oh that's so scary why would your brain work that way i don't know yikes okay i wonder what they're saying about him on the cb radio i'm curious about that well laura i don't know just go away um Go away. Thanks, Laura. I have another one from Jubbits.

Oh, God. This is a one-star review by Booger. I did not make that up. Rude as hell. My wife got thrown out of ladies' restroom for washing out a few dishes we had from cooking on our truck. And turkey-legged woman confronts the wife, says, you can't be doing dishes

here i guess you want us to just be nasty and destroy the truck lot like your personality destroyed your life and you're working at a fuel stop good job turkey legs end of review oh my god this is one of the wildest ones i've ever heard turkey legs i was laughing so hard because i'm like what what are you specific like chicken leg like i've heard like calling someone like chicken legs but it's turkey is that a thing no it seemed very at first i thought they were saying like we were cleaning turkey wings out of our dishes like i literally thought that had to be do with oh no a turkey-legged woman confronts his confronts the wife you can't do dishes in here what have what are you doing doing dishes in the bathroom i mean i don't know where else you would

do them i don't really know how it works why do you have dishes what okay because an rv typically has like something like a like a sink right they're in a truck i assume yeah i don't know if they're in a truck an rv or what but they and they specifically said uh i guess you want us to just be nasty and destroy the truck lot so what i assume is most people wash out their dishes in the lot with a hose or something or if they have water attachment on their i don't know i'm making all this up as i go along but i assume most people would would not use the bathroom to wash their dishes normally. But also, like, if you're washing dishes off, like, you know how those bathroom sinks in a public bathroom have, like, little holes and then you're putting food in there? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, I think those are clearly not meant for washing dishes. Or whoever, turkey leg or chicken leg or whoever is going to have to scoop out, like, your gross bits of food out of the sink. It's disgusting. No, I agree. Oh, God. to have to scoop out like your gross you know bits of food out of the sink it's disgusting no i agree um and then it says like your personality destroyed your life like it's so unnecessarily your personality and your turkey legs if i'm confronted for doing anything i say okay i will never do this again you're right wow absolutely i i don't know you break their rules and it's their rule i don't know i you're and you got caught doing something you weren't

supposed to do so why do you have to lash out this aggressively when someone just yeah if you said like i was it's so weird trying to wash my hands okay but like yeah you know that you know you're not supposed to do that you know that good job turkey legs i was laughing so hard i don't know it was just such a bizarre i've never oh my god it was so bizarre one of the best ones you've ever brought to the table thank you thank you uh wow turkey legs i like how you know by the way that they call her that forever now yeah remember turkey legs so true like that poor lady whatever that forever now yeah remember that's so true like that poor lady whatever that even means i don't know but they're gonna call her that forever

and ever this poor woman oh no oh my god your personality ruined your life wow that is harsh right i know i'm just like really necessary yeah oh my god well i don't have any more because i ended up the forum so good well guess what i've got a couple redemptions oh great uh so my first redemption this is of uh 74 fuel stop in harrison ohio uh this is by matthew five stars nice little gas station with more than meets the eye end of review no no no no i don't know what it means but i don't want to know and if i saw that i'd be like what's the next stop on the highway let's get this one i read that and i was talking i was like doing research and talking to my friend steven um and i read it and

i was laughing so hard for some reason and then i asked him and i was like is this even funny i just read this because he doesn't listen so i wouldn't know and i was like is this even funny i just read this because he doesn't listen so i wouldn't know and i was like is this funny he was like it sounds sexual and i'm like okay that's good enough oh i thought it did too yeah and i was like that if that's how people take it then they'll they'll enjoy it and so i mean that's why that's sort of like secretive like hints at something sounds like maybe there's a wink face at the end of it well like speaking of which here is a review of pilot travel center in walton kentucky i would not be surprised if i have been there um this is a five-star review uh by bob this place has more

than just gas i hear truckers love the showers and all. I just like the convenience to stretch and get more than just gas. End of review. What on earth? I don't know what's going on. Also, the tone I'm reading it is very purposeful. Yeah, but if I read that, I'd be like, excuse me? You're getting what now?

If my friend or somebody was like oh i'm going to get gas and more i'd be like what the hell are you talking about well it's like the the the convenience store come and go you can oh god come and go you get a little bit of everything oh my god have you seen come and go's uh tiktok official tiktok that's pretty great it is it's literally just they are clearly an employee but they don't act they act as if they're just someone who like they have tiktoks that were like oh i hacked the come and go thing and they make all these like come jokes it's it's bizarre oh my god but it's official and it's really fun but it's official it is official that's how you know um wow that was Those were really uncomfortable.

Thank you for that. Yikes. Okay. Christina, you literally just read from the Trekkers form. And talk about uncomfortable. It was about kidnapping and hinting at the murder of hitchhikers. And you're like, thanks for this stuff that made us uncomfortable that didn't even say anything bad. Yours was flat out terrible.

Flat. You're giving me shit. Earth. Terrible. Yeah. Okay, so this is my challenge. It was to find a review of a place of worship where the reviewer thought it was a different religion. And this is from Grace.

And this was extreme well it it was really difficult only because i don't know i had a hard time searching for this it's fine this is a review of the episcopal church of saint mary the virgin and i hope i got did completed the challenge and this is in the philippines there's a four-star review by okay you went all like you ventured in the philippines to be more specific and this is a four-star review by... Jeez, okay. You went all, like, you ventured for this. It's in Poblacion in the Philippines, to be more specific. And this is a four-star review by Erica. Very serene. I thought it was a Catholic church, but it is still the house of our Lord.

Well, when we went there, it was closed, so we just took pictures. End of review. And I read that, and I'm going to read this next one because they have a similar air to them and I don't know if you're going to notice it. This is a review of the Virgin Mary Ethiopian Orthodox Tiwahedo Cathedral. And this

I didn't write down where this was but this is a review by Alan. They both have virgin in them. It's all I've noticed here. Yeah, Mary the Virgin, like Jane the Virgin sort of yeah is that the is that the same thing the show in the virgin's about i don't really know it's a soap uh yeah a soap opera about jesus um or wait no no mary the virgin is a soap opera oh got it got it got it so virgin mary ethiopian orthodox tiwahito cathedral and this is a review by alan four stars

it's a nice church but i thought it was a Christian church, but it was not. So we just head down to the Pentecost church. But the people who go there are very polite. A little distance, but polite. End of review. A little distance. Like, what are you doing here? So both of these to me were like, they had a similar air to me, which is basically like,

technically, they're still children of god still counts i guess like i guess i'll give them a pass a little bit of respect for them but not my full respect god said it's okay don't get mad you went in the wrong church don't worry like they're trying to defend yeah or something. We went, it was still the house of our Lord was the first one, even though it was not Catholic. And then the second one was, we thought it was Christian. Everyone was polite, but like pretty distant,

but still I guess polite. So now this one's my favorite. This is pretty wild. And this is actually my last one, but it's really long. So this is of Kirtland Temple in Kirtland, Ohio. Oh, okay. Temple.

Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. I'm excited. Do you have a guess as to what religion this would be? Well, when I hear Kirtland, so Kirtland is... I don't know what that is. It's a city, I assume, because it's in Kirtland, Ohio.

Oh, no, I know. Sorry. So when you first said Kirtland Temple, I thought, what the hell is a Kirtland? Where I thought, what is that? I thinkirtland? I was like, what is that? I think of Kirkland like Costco brand. Oh, yeah, yeah. True, true, true. Because it's spelled K-I-R-T-L-A-N-D.

Oh, weird. So it's, okay. Kirtland. So when I think temple, I think Buddhist. Okay. That wasn't even a nice. Hindu temple. We went to catholic school our our religion knowledge isn't super expansive but it is shintoism shintoism no but uh i find shinto okay we'll

talk about that another day uh let me tell you what i think of shintoism um no uh lds oh latter-day saints they're called temples okay i didn't know that so this is a mormon temple yep huh how did i not know that i don't know i feel stupid oh well did you ever watch that netflix special nope oh well maybe that maybe that will teach you that netflix special so okay good you don't know what you're talking no no it's a mormon temple but it's called we neither of us know what we're talking we do i do but it's called the church of jesus christ of latter-day saints like is like the religion so maybe that's why you're saying you thought it was not a temple but a church yeah but it is a temple okay but no i believe you i'm

not saying you're wrong i'm just surprised i just didn't realize you don't know what documentary i'm talking about it's called murder among the mormons nope what i have no idea it's so good okay whatever so four stars by sam of kirtland temple in kirtland ohio worth a visit even for gentiles full disclosure i am not lds and am in fact ordained in another denomination however i have always been interested in the history of the Mormon movement. Really quick. Even for Gentiles? Doesn't Gentile just mean not Jewish?

So what does that have? What does that have anything to do with the Church of Latter-day Saints? I don't know. I'm sorry for stopping us here. This is this is turned into a religious and like it filled in mormon for me because i just googled really temple i'm learning so much this is good members regard themselves as israelites and gentile is used to denote any person who is not of the house of israel oh house of oh through blood descent or adoption by means

of baptism into the lds church. Well, you know why? Do you know why? Yes, I do know why. Let's not talk about it. It's a song. Oh, that's not what I thought. What do you think? Oh, I know what you're thinking. No, I know what you're thinking.

That one's we're not going. No, no, no, no, no. I'm thinking of that song. Gentile or Jew. Yes. No. Well, one million percent. Mark Friedman sang that in chapel.

With his guitar. Yeah,man sang that in chapel. With his guitar. Yeah. I had no idea that it was a little broader than just someone of the Jewish faith or not of the Jewish faith. Yep. It's broader apparently. So he says I'm so sorry for derailing this.

Listen I'm glad we have Google because it could have ended much more poorly and I'm sure we'll still get descriptions of how I'm wrong, but whatever. However, I have always been interested in the history of the Mormon movement. Now, I'd like to add that they spelled Mormon M-O-R-M-A-N, which I'm like, you can't have been that interested. Mormon and Barnacle Boy. Mormon and Barnacle Boy.

Stop. Okay. I've always wanted to see the Kirtland Temple. I didn't realize that it was no longer owned by the main LDS church, but by the Community of Christ, a splinter group led by Joseph Smith's son. So that's where it was like,

I didn't realize it was not a... Joseph Smith's the dude who found the plate. Was it a plate? I thought it was a plate. Alexander, stop it. You're gonna... I don't want to Google anymore. You should watch the documentary.

Our tweets, our ads are going to be fucking wild. It's going to be bad. And I'm going to come back from my trip like, what the fuck did we talk about in that episode three weeks ago? I don't know, for real, in three weeks we're going to be so confused when all of a sudden everyone's like, actually, Joseph Smith. And we're like, what the hell are you telling me about Joseph Smith? Okay.

A splinter group led by Joseph Smith's son. It is amazing that it is still standing at all after all this time and that it is so well preserved one would think that if the townspeople hated the mormons so badly they would have destroyed their precious temple as soon as they passed the county line on their way west i also have serious issues with the ironic and melchizedek priesthoods oh you and me both, friend. That's a joke because I have no idea what we're talking about. Not ironic, like A-A-R-O-N, like Aaron. A-A-R-O-N? Ironic and Melchizedek.

Melchizedek, priesthoods, and the Book of Mormon, and the Pearl of Great Price. Be that as it may, the temple is a beautiful building and cost a great deal of expense and effort to construct. a beautiful building and cost a great deal of expense and effort to construct. One important historical note is that a certain Brigham Young joined the church in Kirtland and constructed the windows for the temple as well as doing a lot of the wood carving. Our guide was practically drooling over an old window on display on the third floor which was mainly used as a school. He said when they scraped the old paint off they found the initials BY on the frame. I looked, looked again, and just saw random scratches. However, I also don't buy the story that Joseph Smith and Newell saw an angel come through the window and consecrate the temple. It was quite fascinating

to sit in Joseph Smith's office and see the cubbyhole where he kept some Egyptian mummies he had bought. Did he know they would soon have to leave the beautiful building family and friends behind to move on to missouri and illinois and that he himself would be pulled from a jail cell and lynched like no sam i don't think he knew that he did well supposedly jesus knew what was going to happen to him so why not well supposedly you're right like he probably knew more than most of us do about our fate if If, if what they say is true. So maybe, maybe he did know.

Do you like that? He said what they say, if what they say is true. Wow. That's the most sweeping statement. That's why I laughed right there. That was, that was,

you sound ridiculous. I'm trying to be as broad. Okay. Yeah. Broad strokes. So, uh, all these people don't hate us.

This is fascinating. I'm actually enjoying this review quite a bit. I know. So all these people don't hate us. This is fascinating. I'm actually enjoying this review quite a bit. I know. I think this person seems like a scholar and like slightly funny because he's just like, I looked and looked and looked and like, it's literally just scratches. There's no initials. Like Brigham Young didn't really sign this when I'm like, but I, and I do like they have, they have a skepticism, not a flat out disbelief.

It's more of a skepticism about things like an angel coming through the window to consecrate the building it seems like this person yeah this person is trying to be very respectful while also laying out some facts that's interesting did he know okay i'm not gonna read that whole sentence again but basically did he know he would have to leave his family behind move to illinois and pulled from a jail cell and lynched the stucco that used to cover the building so it gleamed in the sun is gone now but the building is still impressive many of the mormons in our tour group were moved to tears or prayer as the tour ended by singing a mormon hymn facing the famous window end of review oh well that's that's that would be my cue to leave i'm sorry he's over there like taking pictures of like the mummy

cubby and they're like all crying if shit like that's free i'd hop in i'd be like cool let me see what you gotta say this seems fun i would i would love to see it architecture sounds kind of interesting i suppose uh but the moment people start singing i'm out of there uh yeah because we've had enough singing religious singing for a lifetime time um i can go to church for free any day of the week i don't i don't i don't need that in my life allison and i went to the um san diego mormon battalion site in in san diego have you been there nope it is so cool um it was a little wild because it is like definitely run by the LDS church, but it's so fascinating. They tell the story of like how they moved West.

It's like definitely a religious tone for obvious reasons, but like even for quote unquote Gentiles, it was very interesting. You two have talked about that a lot. Yes, it's fascinating. And we got some great little touristy photos. Cool, cool. We got to watch a little animated movie about it.

To be fair, what I think is one of the coolest colored buildings in LA is run by the Church of Scientology. I know, I knew you were going to say that. Giant purple color. I love the purple. And everything else about it I dislike. That's how they get you. That's how they all...

I walked in there, stumbled in like, man, I love like man i love this place purple got through all the security there's so many people and i didn't know what's going on they all were dressed the same oh i said oh you love the color purple here they said we don't know hand over your zoloft you're one of us now and then i said oh i can't handle him without that please give it back just kidding um so that's all i have for uh i thought the church was run by someone different or a different religion that's that was good i actually really really enjoyed that last one oh good because i had fun with that last one too and i was like wow this is educational and entertaining all at the same time when you started he said this one's my favorite and i said why why is she putting the favorite just in the

middle and then you said and my last one i was like oh okay good it's the pinnacle best for last okay um and yeah you did i loved that that was really fun thank you well thank you to grace um for that and thank you uh to who did we say did the why did i do this jay jay who didn't actually give the theme so no one did so jay you can't be mad at us it was me all along yeah it was it was you and i didn't actually give the theme. So no one did. So Jay, you can't be mad at us. It was me all along. Yeah, it was. It was you. And I didn't even read a Bucky's one. So because Bucky Bucky's isn't a truck stop.

It is. It's like a convenience store gas station. I think they have truck parking. Really? I don't know. OK, don't. Maybe. I've never been to one.

You guys, I'm going to look it up in four seconds. Please don't tweet about it. Three weeks from now, it's going to be bucky's truck forums and joseph smith i'm not ready for it right now and i certainly will be less ready for it in three weeks but uh still you can find us on twitter at beach to sandy but we still want to hear from you yeah so um anyway thank you all, we might be still accepting, uh, reviews for the, uh, theme and challenge for the next couple episodes. So, uh, check that out on Twitter. We'll have our, um, due date deadline.

You can email those at beachyousandy at gmail.com. They do not allow 18 wheelers. They do not on Buc-ee's. Okay. So don't add us and don't bring your 18 wheeler to, uh, Buc-ee's. I will know that you didn't finish the episode and I will not be happy if you tweet me. You're going to get called out. And then, yeah, beach2sandy at gmail.com is our email.

And then you can find us on Instagram and Twitter, beach2sandy. And we love you and we'll talk to you soon. We'll talk to you when Zany gets back home from his long venture. Did he know he would have to leave his family and all the stucco behind let's hope that's the end of this i hope that's the last thing that happens okay Bye.