Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet - 164: Revisiting Old Friends

Episode Date: January 19, 2022

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Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Order up for Damien. Hey, how did your doctor's appointment go, by the way? Did you ask about Rebelsis? Actually, I'm seeing my doctor later today. Did you say Rebelsis?

My dad's been talking about Rebelsis. Rebelsis? Really? Yeah, he says it's a pill that... That's right! Did you know it's also covered by most private insurance plans? Well, I'll definitely be asking my doctor if Rebelsis is right for me. Rebelsis. Ask your doctor or visit rebelsis.ca. Order up for Rebelsis. Welcome to Beach to Sandy, Water to Wet. A podcast featuring real reviews written by people who just need the world to know what they think.

Between you and me, I wanted to like this podcast. But I'd give it zero stars if I could. Yeehaw! Welcome! Did I miss the theme? What? What's the theme? Rodeos.

I'm just kidding. Oh, my God. You just gave me a freaking heart attack, Alexander. That's a good idea, though. You scared me. I'm sorry. You should have seen, everybody. You should have seen the fear in my eyes. No, this is our Yelp celebrities or whatever you call them.

I wrote revisiting old friends. Revisiting old friends, yes. The ones I chose, I feel like it's not ones that... They stood out to me for some reason. Okay, great. So it's nothing... I don't know if I did any of the big ones. Oh, that's fine.

Plus I figured you might have gone through that list and I didn't want to step on toes. There was one that I was hoping you would do, but... Oh, no. I'm sure I didn't do it. That's okay. Because Blaze suggested it, and then we were both like, I bet Zandy will do that one. But we were wondering about Monty and his garlic fries. His garlic fries?

Yeah. I'll look that up for next week. Okay. Okay. Because I wasn't sure. I meant to ask you, and then I didn't want to ruin the surprise. No, I didn't do Monty. That to ruin the surprise no i didn't do monty that's a good one i didn't do you won't right remember you might remember the reviews but it's not like anyone a character yeah okay don't worry i brought a lot of characters

okay good good yeah um okay great well oh i wanted to say one thing too which i never got to publicly thank you for which was my christmas gift one of my christmas gifts from you um alexander bought me an ornament it's like which one alexander bought me an ornament from um what's the website called again it was i i don't even remember it it was like custom or ornament designs dot com or something like that the one that i was reading reviews of um with the kid with the broken arm and the review said i wish it were his left arm, not his right arm. Yeah, and we talked about our old friend Carl who fell off a shovel. And broke his arm.

Yeah. And Alexander got me the ornament with that quote on it that we said in the episode, which was something about Carl falling off his shovel. I think it was like, hi, I'm Carl. I fell off my shovel. It was something like that. And I have it on my tree. Well, not anymore. I took the tree down.

Yeah, I've never seen you take your tree down quicker. You know, she puts that ornament on the tree and then boom, the tree's down as soon as possible. It's because the tree died. But now it like just suddenly died. And I was like, oh, okay. That ornament was the last straw. It just ceased to live any longer. So I just wanted to publicly thank you for that present because I was clearing ornaments yesterday and i was just beside myself so goofy um okay so who wants to go first um i'll go ahead

i've got a game at the end okay great it's really stupid and i was cracking up at myself but now uh-oh i'm not sure it's gonna be to be interesting. Can I go first, actually? Actually, yes, please. I know I just asked that if you wanted to go first, but I'm going to go first because I, this, Blaze suggested this too. He said, why don't you go back to the first episode or the first review you ever read? Wow. Do you know which one it was? The first one either of us read? Yeah.

Was it Kitty Clitter in Jungle Gym? So then it was Baron of Cream. Yes, it was Long John Donut. Baron of Cream. And so I went back and listened to that. Then I found the review online. It's still there. And I found the reviewer.

Her name is Rose. And I'm going to read the original review. Yay, okay. And then I did that for all of mine just so we can refresh. Me too. I have the originals ready. Oh, good. So this is the original review of Kroger in Corrieville.

Two stars. Upon purchasing my cream-filled long john donut for 69 cents, I was very ecstatic to devour it after a long day. But much to my dismay, that need was never satisfied. The donut I purchased had about one-eighth cream into it. This is like there's so much packed into like three sentences. I know, it's so funny. Oh my god, it's so weird reliving this. Okay.

Not only that, but for some godforsaken reason, the cream was inserted through the side of the donut, so every other bite was dry and barren of cream the donut did not meet any of my expectations whatsoever everyone like all the new people are like yeah barren is a word like duh no that's spelled b-a-r-o-n yeah this would be a weird episode to listen to as your first since we're kind of doing throwbacks but i guess since we're reading the originals yeah you don't technically need past knowledge prior knowledge and it's kind of fun for people who have listened to all of them to hear old old favorites and maybe not

favorites based on mine i people are going to be like you i don't even remember that one um but yeah that's that's amazing and we've got more from Rose. Oh, yeah. So I found one more. This is a three-star review of McDonald's. I went to McDonald's. Prior to being here, I called to assure myself there was a drive-thru. The lady was very sweet and helped me. But much to my dismay, there was no opening on the inside. We had to go through the drive-thru, which was okay because that's what we wanted. I'm very sad, but it's okay.

What? Okay. First of all, I was getting lost in that because the verbiage and everything, it's exactly... Okay. Maybe I'm... Like predisposed to hearing it a certain way? Just because we just... But I'm wondering if you just read that one and had me guess.

Yeah. There's something about that review that very much relates to that. I completely agree. And I don't know what it is either, but I hear the same cadence of sentences. But yeah, so, okay. So she called McDonald's to assure herself there was a drive-thru. There was. So she showed up.

There was no opening on the inside. Whatever that means. I guess she couldn't go into the store. Yeah, so they had to go through the drive-thru. So we had to go through the drive-thru, which is okay, because that's what we wanted. I'm very sad, but it's okay. What is happening? Listen, she's having, she's almost setting herself up for a sad day.

How many stars was that? Three. What? McDonald's just can't win. She's's like the lady was wonderful and healthy they had the drive-thru but wow i mean the only way this would have made sense as a negative review is if she had shown up and there was no drive-thru yes yeah because then her all of her assurances were for not were for not yeah but would have been baron of assurances and baron of drive-thru wow i like that that's so fun i don't know it's just so much like the first one that's kind of creepy it is weird i don't know

if we're gonna well i'm definitely gonna get that with my my game that i do later you'll see agonizing over that first review the um baron of cream finding the right one yeah because we were only doing one review at the time and i remember reading it and going like this because we'd never done it before obviously and i was like i don't know if this can be funny at all like i had no freaking clue if it was gonna be funny yeah we just tried to juggle not only our humor the problem is we have like a little humor bubble yeah that's true that we definitely things that we definitely find funny that other people might not find funny not that our humor is advanced at all it's literally just like we've known each other my entire life i was about to say our entire lives but okay i had two blissful years without me um but yeah i don't know it's hard to try to find something that we found funny and that we thought

other people would find funny and i still struggle with that like just wait till my game at the end i can't wait for your game weirdly funny but i think it's gonna be hilarious my google doc is 13 pages because i think i have so many reviews crap this is gonna be something this is i feel like this is an anniversary episode and i know like this feels like a special occasion but oh we just relived our first episode so fun this is kind of fun okay for us at least wait i just realized we passed our actual anniversary it was in december yeah december 12th whoops okay so we can pretend this yeah yeah happy just like a month and a half late okay my first review comes from the person who wrote a review of mcginn's pistachio land world's largest pistachio in alma gordo new mexico and does this ring a bell at all probably not i

remember we talked about large nuts. Okay. Or like large. Yeah. That was a thing. Because there was a peanut. Because I had a peanut. There was a peanut one and someone was complaining about how big it was. That it wasn't that big. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The world's largest peanut statue.

But this world's largest peanut statue review is a little different. Okay. So I forget what I named them, but I'm going to name them Ben here. Okay. Here's a two-star review. This is the original review from, this is the world's largest landmarks or whatever episode. We took a tour of their pistachio farm and on the tour, the tour guide, who is a partner

of the main guy who owns the business, proudly revealed to us how whenever they see a rabbit or other creatures on their farm, they load them up into cannons, like the ones you shoot t-shirts out of, and try to hit this metallic roof with them as they are shooting them out of their farm. I understand that unwanted animals in a farm can be detrimental to crops. However, I do believe that there are more humane ways of dealing with them than shooting them up out of a cannon and proudly joking about it, especially when there are kids on the tours. The tour was fine otherwise. You get a nice explanation of how to grow pistachios

and make wine. The pistachios themselves tasted fine. In my opinion, the best ones are just the normal salted and roasted ones. End of review. I fully remember that. And then there was a response. Yes, the response was basically like, we do nothing of the sort.

That was a joke. They said that they would be tough to catch these animals, firstly. Secondly, it would be very difficult to put them in a cannon. They were like, even if we wanted to shoot them out of a cannon, which maybe we do, maybe we don't. And then they said there is a cannon. It's a propane cannon and it's set on a timer to make noise that scares away birds. So there is a cannon there,

but it literally is just a noise cannon or whatever. And they also use owl statues. And also there's just one owner of the farm, so no partner. So not sure what that was about. Oh, right. Somebody just walked in off out of the woods yeah this tour and then at the end they were like and the roasted and salted are certainly still a

best-selling flavor to like they touched on every part of the review um so yeah basically ben was a little gullible so i was like oh maybe there's another gullible one i love this i i don't know if that's exactly what i found here, but here's just a review. This is just, oh, Ben, here we go. This is of Happy Chicks in downtown Austin. This is a one-star review. And this is more about the owner response. Do we need to know what this is?

Happy Chick, oh, it's a restaurant. Oh, okay. Sorry. It sounds like strip club or a restaurant. It says chicken, and then it has a single dollar sign. Take that for what you will. I don't know. Here's what Ben has to say.

One star. Quite possibly the worst meal I've had in a while. There was absolutely nothing to be fond of or return for. The strips were very greasy, too. Whenever we received our food, six of us, we asked which sauces were which, and the guy responded rudely, saying to figure it out. Whack. End of review.

And then the owner responded and said, Ben, this is very unprofessional. You were relieved of your job because of insubordination. Best of luck. End of response. Oh my god. Ben. Okay. Then Ben updated.

Holy shit. And said this. The person responsible for applying to these reviews is indicating that I am a disgruntled former employee. However, this is completely untrue and an attempt to get my review removed. End of review. So there's this drama. The plot thickens. I was excited to find some drama here wow i

i rarely do this but i kind of believe ben here i kind of do too right it seems like a really straight okay because my first thought was like oh wow so if ben really worked there why would that be the review that he left to try and like sabotage the business like like i guess the food is bad but then the thing about the sauces like it just seems very specific why would you so now we're telling giving people tips on how to leave i guess believable reviews um but for someone who was so unable to pick up sarcasm or whatever or get a joke yeah i don't think ben is capable of being a disgruntled employee good point and like leaving a fake review he kind of like sees it for what it is

like he doesn't really read between the lines from that one single review i heard yeah i've already determined this about him but yeah we know everything about ben from these characters right in front of our eyes um yeah i I agree with you that I'm leaning toward Ben being kind of the truthful one here, but what a move by the business to be like, you're a disgruntled former employee. End of story. Now in hindsight, I should have checked all the reviews

and just watched every single person get the same response. I don't know, though. I kind of doubt doubt so that's the thing though is i bet if i looked that would be the only one yeah there'd probably be a lot so that's a very specific like why would you my my guess is maybe there was some someone with the same first name yeah different ben who did get fired and at the right at that time so it was like just kind of suspicious and back yeah so i don't know i'm not saying anyone really had you know anything too sinister they weren't up to anything too sinister maybe

it was just both of them making like one some guy just leaving a one-star review and then the business actually thinking it was someone else yeah so did you um remember like the rabbit canon is that what brought you back or did you just randomly go through old i went through i went through a lot of google docs and a lot of screenshots okay and picked my favorites that i remembered and then i would look them up and half the time i went through so many that did not have further reviews or if they did there weren't any good ones yeah there were some like that for me yeah so it was a little a little tough but well um i'm happy to report that i oh by the way um

this was sent in by natalie i want to add because natalie was very helpful and sent a list of characters to choose from or just like to spark you know ideas and joy also spark joy um it did not spark joy no it didn't do that but uh it did spark ideas and so one of the people i went and looked up was 10 renaissance paintings amazing aka george of las vegas yes i was about to be like oh yeah the guy that blah blah blah and then i realized you're about to read it yes i am okay oh we all buckle up this is a good one this is a classic uh it's a review of family dollar on consumer affairs.com and uh not to be confused with common sense media or common or comments i get all confused. All three of those are just jumbled in our heads. One in the same in my mind.

And so George wrote this review of Family Dollar in 2010, by the way. Wow. That's weird. Okay. I know. Since taking Family Dollar Store's sleep aid containing 100% diphenhydramine on and off for several years, I increased its nightly use because I was getting used to the addictive drug and it did not work as well. Sunrise Hospital, October 28th to October 30th, kept me under medication in an unconscious

state for three days, creating this extremely expensive bill of $60,000. I am not sure if this was actually medically necessary, even though I am 61 years old, but the drug caused seizures, nosebleeds, and spitting up clots of coagulated blood. Two months of fresh pear juice therapy flushed the drug from the lower extremities of my body. From the low, okay. There's so many random details in here that i completely forgot and i don't mean to laugh at this person's a financial hardship or b medical dilemmas but just the pear juice therapy just sends me sends me somewhere every time i mean and also just

lowering it's just the lower part of the lower. What does that mean? Just pooped it all out or something? It's still in his arms, just not in his toes. Oh, got it. Thank goodness. Ask Blaze about Paragys. I will not. This all caused the executor of my mother's estate, my sister Debbie, to doubt and instill her narcissistic temper on me, asking me to leave my father's house because she did not want to be responsible for me.

Now she will not allow me to try to sell our collection of 10 Renaissance pages. I can't. What does it mean? And all of this is on a consumer affairs review. It's so wild. I'm like, go talk to a lawyer. He's at home with like all this pear, so much pear juice. And his sister's like, get out.

And this whole thing is not helping your case, writing this all out. Oh, now she will not allow me to try to sell our collection of 10issance paintings because she does not trust me in this mental state i went and listened to the original episode and at this point you were like i don't think i'd i'd trust him to sell our renaissance paintings either in this mental state i'm pretty sure we were all also like questioning whether they were 10 renaissance paintings for obvious reasons also the ambulance attendant caused damage to my right arm while attempting to restrain me, making it difficult to even write my name. The problem caused by this drug creates a lot of tension in this household for my 89-year-old father and me. I believe this dangerous drug should be taken off the market or at least labeled adhered to the boxes of products containing this drug. the market or at least labels adhered to the boxes of products containing this drug.

The company and the pharmaceutical companies that make products containing diphenhydramine should be sued by anyone who has had these symptoms and have been hospitalized or by the family if the person died. The FDA has been warned and MedWatch said they would look into it, but nothing has happened. The drugs continues to be sold and does not have adequate warning labels. End of review. Wow. And I i'm you know what i he might be right about that that they don't have adequate but what the fuck yeah i mean i mean i don't know what kind of label if should there be a label that says like do not you might

go into a coma sell 10 renaissance paintings while taking this drug do not operate heavy machinery or sell your mom's renaissance paintings. But yeah, it was put into a medical coma for like two days, right? Yeah, for three days, actually. Jesus. And I mean, I remember explaining this in the original, so I won't go into it too much, but diphenhydramine is just Benadryl. It's like antihistamine.

So it's basically like a Z-Quil situation that he was taking. I don't know. Maybe it's like in Breaking Bad when Walter needs an excuse and so he pretends like he was in a fugue state for days. Oh, yeah. Maybe this guy's leaving a trail of things

to be like something to do. I don't know. I don't know what his end goal is you're putting a lot of stock into this consumer affairs i can't believe we still have more get to hear more from him i'm a little nervous so obviously nothing stood up to the 10 renaissance paintings but because i needed to reread the 10 renaissance paintings i found a review of geico by george what year do you know when this was this was uh 2015 okay so five years later still reviewing things and still still alive still kicking uh

yeah and now is actually a verified reviewer oh good yeah oh so look at that he made it that sounds so mean i'm not trying to be mean about that. I'm just like, I don't know. Hopefully he's doing well. I'm sure he's doing great. I just, yeah. I just, all these past people. He dusted himself off. I mean, I just want them to be happy. Okay, well.

Anyway. Save that for after this review. Because this might. Oh, no. I'm just like defending him now. This might dampen your hopes about his well-being. Oh, shit. One star of Geicoico company needs to be

investigated four years after an accident the wife and i are still suffering from our injuries and no settlement do not do business with this company they take your money but never absolutely never pay out too busy suckering people in with the lizard, which is actually... For a split second, I thought this was turning into a lizard person conspiracy theory. And then I remembered the Geico gecko and was like, oh, yeah. No, the Geico lizard. The Geico lizard.

That's what dad calls it. Wait, no, he calls it an alligator. He calls it, look, the alligator on TV. He's like, what is that stupid alligator on TV? Why is the alligator talking again? I think dad's on some diphenhydramine or something in his mental state. Oh, no. Wait, Christina.

What? All of those Renaissance paintings he has. Oh, no. Did he sell all 10 of our Renaissance paintings? I heard his sister wouldn't let him. Oh, shit. Debbie and her narcissistic tendencies that are instilled on him? Oh, no.

Okay. We're going to have to send another ambulance driver to restrain him. Jesus Christ. I'm sorry. Okay. This is so bad. It's really fucked up. None of this is positive.

No, no. It's really fucked up. Okay. it's really fucked up none of this is positive no it's really fucked up okay too busy suckering people in with the lizard which is actually an appropriate mascot cold-blooded and not american oh my god also then i googled are lizards american and it said there are 15 or 8 or 15 species of north american lizard. I think that's my first thought. But then I realized the Geico gecko has an accent. It has a British accent. That's right.

You're right. I'm so stupid. No, it's funny because my first thought was like, what? It's not American. Is Geico an American company, though? I have no idea. I wonder what the choice was, why it was a British. Get people talking.

Where is the Geico gecko born? I bet people... I don't think this is a rabbit hole or a lizard hole we want to go down. Where was the Geico gecko born? In Fort Worth, Texas. Oh my god. That's where the company was founded, I guess. Anyway.

Well... Based in Maryland, though. I am sad to report that in 2015, he was still suffering from injuries from his accident. Yeah. Which happened four years prior, a.k.a. 2011. Oh, so maybe operated heavy machinery. Yep. Potentially. He either operated heavy machinery or tried to sell a painting and things went south.

Oh, no. And he was injured in an accident and geico is maybe geico was insuring those paintings oh my you know yeah as they do as the lizard does as the big alligator does um so anyway cold-blooded cold-blooded is right okay so my next one this is uh from the Salt and Pepper Shaker Museum. This is from the museum episode. I love that episode. It's like strange museums or something.

Obscure. Obscure museums, you're right. This is by Stacy. So this is the original one-star review. So the first thing you see is a sign which reads put... Oh, sorry. I forgot, and I think I talked about this. The cap starts at

the word reads right so the first thing you see is a sign which reads put on your mask now i should have known what was coming the mean grumpy man behind counter blurts out 350 per person oh sorry i did this last time i think this is really like sending me nostalgia like sending me back fuck it up the exact same way doesn't matter how many times I've read it the mean grumpy man behind counter blurts out 350 per person doesn't tell us that the shakers are not for sale then when we get to the end and I showed him what I wanted he was angry because I was unaware they were not for sale so I looked through gift shop and found a pair I wanted, asked him the price, and he shouts, the price is on the tag. In the showcase, mind you.

I just left. Smelled like old dusty attic anyways. If you like being verbally abused, have at it. End of review. I will never. I think about this review sometimes. Yeah, this one was one of my favorites because, yeah, I always think of,

well, yeah, remember that person who tried to buy items in a museum just take them just pick them right up picked them up and brought them to the counter as if they were for sale i mean it just baffles it boggles the mind it does mind-boggling mind-boggling i i i was hoping we'd never get to that point of the podcast it's been years since I did that. Okay. And then here's a one-star review from the same person. What did I call it? Sally's? Stacy, I think.

Stacy. Let's do Stacy. This is a one-star review of Timber's Log Cabin Restaurant in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. I don't know what you're trying to steal. All these logs. I'm just trying to pull them out of the wall. We drove all the way from the other side of Pigeon Forge to eat here because of the good reviews. When we arrived, we saw this very cute welcoming cabin, people on porch and in front under umbrellas.

Upon entering, a tattooed lady came in from the back door. I very cheerfully said, hello. Nothing. She looked at me like I had three heads and didn't say one word. So we just left. Can't imagine how you can't do something as simple as say hello.

OMG, what a waste of time. Then she came outside and started closing the umbrellas. So I guess she was getting ready to close. No hours posted and an open door. How one to know ridiculous if they have good food we will never know upon reading other reviews the few that were bad there is a angry response crazy stuff end of review kind of like how they ended it as if it's some weird like conspiracy like i i i thought it was gonna end at like you can't even say hello anymore and that it just kept going yeah kept going and

going and maybe okay i'm not i don't want to make too many assumptions here but the way that this was written was very like trumpy like trump has a way of talking where he'll be like, Oh, he won't like say anything definitively, but he'd be like, Oh, that's pretty crazy. Oh, it's he'll like make a weird point. Try to make a point by just throwing out buzzwords.

I feel like that's what this person's doing. Cause there isn't that much, I don't know, substance. And then they're just throwing out like a tattooed lady. And you're just supposed to make your own judgments. You that you know if you know what i'm saying it's crazy stuff yeah and then saying oh yeah there are these other reviews they're bad ones they're all bad they're all there's there's an angry response there it is there there is an angry response crazy stuff

everybody thinks this way everybody everybody's saying it about this place so yeah but yeah the tattoo this is one of those people who like in many other reviews was always commenting something about the person how is one to know like tattoos piercings whatever that kind of thing so i i also like the i mean i don't think you're going too far out on a limb because in that other review, it literally said, I saw the mask reads or the sign reads put on your mask. And she was like, I should have known what was coming. Yeah, exactly. Like, OK. Yeah.

You must be having a rough couple of years here. Wow. Oh, no, I can't be out of ink. Not now. Mega tank. Why do I do this to myself? Ah, what's that printer that comes with 30 times the ink? Megatank.

Yes, it's a Canon. Megaphone? Megatank. It's a Canon printer. It comes with like two grand worth of ink. Prints me over 7,700 color pages. Megatank. Mega what?

Listen to the voice in your head and get a Canon Megatank printer so you don't have to think about ink for a long, long time. Visit canon.ca slash megatank for details. On April 5th, you must be very careful about it. It's a girl. Witness the birth. Bad things will start to happen. Evil things of evil.

It's all... No, no, don't. The first omen. I believe the girl is to be a mother mother of what is the most terrifying 666 is the mark of the devil movie of the year the first omen only theaters april 5th um okay i'll get her tell me here's the big kahuna foodie news one i got you some foodie news oh i knew it now do you remember anything specifically about foodie news one or is this all kind of a memory jumble to you i i have a feeling once you read it i'll be like wow it was pretty jumbled

but now it's clear. I don't think it'll ever be clear. Really? Okay. Just because he's not really one for clarity. Okay. But as I told you, it was episode 22, which was a very long time ago. And so Foodie News 1, as I said in that episode, put his intentions on Yelp. And you were not having it with that phrase, his intentions on Yelp.

Okay. And his intentions are, in capital letters, secrets to, parentheses, affordable, end parentheses, millionaire dining. Oh my God, I forgot about this. Yeah. So secrets to affordable millionaire dining oh my god i forgot about this yeah so secrets to affordable millionaire dining that is foodie news one's um forte intentions whatever you want to call it um and originally i found this review because we were doing beaches in hawaii okay and he kept talking about the folks experiencing homelessness there and he had a lot of very negative things to say yes which is how i ended up on his profile yeah uh i have a i want to read the there were a couple originals

because remember i went into a like a black hole of his page at the time um and he copy and pasted all so i went on his yelp page like a year ago it was like months after the original one because i remembered and i was like oh i should bookmark this everything was gone empty wow and i panicked at the time thinking did he hear our freaking episode and delete everything i don't think that's what happened but for whatever reason all of the reviews have been copy and pasted to trip advisor okay weird i know so they're now all on trip advisor maybe maybe trip advisor paid and paid him and was like, hey, want to be an exclusive TripAdvisor reviewer? We want those millionaire dining secrets. I mean, it's like with streaming people, all these Twitch streamers, YouTube is like, can I throw money at you to come to our platform?

Facebook did the same thing. Really? And the moment their contract's up, they're like, coming back to Twitch. Oh, man. And then the two main competitors are youtube and facebook it's not pretty yeah it's amazon amazon owns twitch oh amazon oh okay google owns youtube and then fucking facebook meta owns facebook oh trifecta what kind of planet do we live in that's terrifying uh okay so here's a five-star review by foodie news one of applebee's this is the one of the original like a millionaire

yep and this title is secrets to abz oh my god it's all coming back abz you're gonna like you're gonna remember this oh my god more secrets first about servers top three tall beth okay i love this i about peed myself when i found this and I was like, I cannot believe I forgot about this. Top three. Tall Beth. Handlebar mustache Robbie. I can't with this.

And rocking Tiffany. Oh, Tiffany. Oh my God. Where are they now? That's what I want to know. I don't know. You'll see them all walking fast. That's so bad.

Love it. I used to say that. Best long, long legs walking fast around Applebee's. Oh my god, I'm going to cry. You'll see them all walking fast, and anything you ask for, it's there. Bam! They make me feel like i'm mr apple on to food again my fave is two for 25 adding minced garlic to the spinach dip yum

bourbon shrimp and chicks with lemon cream sauce again garlic the sauce caramelizes when it hits the sizzling iron platter every bite is smoking hot next time i will see if they have a balsamic dressing which smells amassing sizzling. My wife went super duper healthy instead of potatoes. She got lots of zucchini and mushrooms. They love doing these things. Make sure you over tip. End of review.

Hey. I forgot it ended on a good message. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. He likes to tip his server. So, I mean, you know, for what it's worth. Handlebar mustache Robbie. Oh, my God. Tall Beth. you know for what it's worth uh handlebar mustache robbie oh my god tall best i wonder what they

what their name for him is oh boy mr apple mr apple also yeah why would it be mr apple i what's why do you drop the bees um mr apple bees like why would, why would someone whose last name is Apple found something called Apple Bees? Like, what is it? Yeah. How does that make sense? Maybe it's someone, Apple, and someone whose last name is Bees. Together, partners, made Apple Bees.

Maybe it's Tall Beth. Probably. ABZ is the other. So, so i was there i wish i could explain it to you but the fact that he calls it abz to begin with doesn't like an airport code doesn't really lend itself to helping me understand the situation um but i have another apple bees review to follow up since since that was the original review. I found another review. Okay.

Of Applebee's. Got it. So Applebee's, sorry, falls under Dine Brands Global Inc., which is on the stock market as DIN. Oh. So I was wondering if ABZ was like, if Applebee's was publicly traded. Oh my God. was like if applebee's was publicly traded oh my god so but it's it falls under dine brands global which owns uh uh i hop twitch it actually owns meta google oh my god and amazon so it's like owned all of it that's that's wow that's next level yeah so that's what it's traded as so

millionaire dining for sure. I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt and say that Applebee's was traded as ABZ on the stock market. Mr. Apple coming through. Okay, so this is a five-star review of Applebee's and it was two years later that he left this review. Oh, this is the new one of a different Applebee's? It's a different...

I believe it's a different Applebee's. But I'm not totally sure. Okay. So, the title is, Don't Be Shy, Customize Your Food Here. JoJo made A, B, Z great again. Oh. Oh, dear God. I didn't hear that until i read it out loud christina

jojo made abz great again wait wait wait d sorry d i assume jojo's like an employee but like d and i had this talk about the different jojos that that exist. Right. Because she was like, oh, JoJo whatever. And I was like, the singer or JoJo Siwa or the Bachelor JoJo? It was the Bachelor JoJo. It's only those three. But those are the three. But then I was like, wait, am I crazy? Did maybe, is there some connection there between JoJo the singer and JoJo? I don't know.

What? Okay, sorry. I didn't know there's a Bachelor contestant named Jojo. Okay. So I was thinking, oh, what if this is a really old episode or thing, and then Jojo was on The Bachelor and then had a singing career. Kind of like a Disney star. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's exactly how I saw it. But I was like, I'm pretty sure that never happened. I feel like I would know. Unrelated. And then Dee was like, yeah, that's... That's nothing. That's nothing. And I was like, yeah, in hindsight,

it's a ridiculous thought. But what did happen is that JoJo went on The Bachelor and then ended up working at Applebee's. That makes more sense to me. And she made it great again. Okay.

Oh, I'm sorry. JoJo seems to be a dude. As I glance at the review one more time. Let me read this and you can decide. Okay, I'm sorry. I'll be quiet. Jojo made ABZ great again.

Last week, I did have a very poor experience with a server and her communication with the kitchen, I guess. Enough said. But last night, I had server Jojo rocked. Tall dude with cool glasses. Actually, he always rocks it. What I asked for, he delivered 100% right from the beginning. The $25 deal with a tad more salsa, my spinach dip, and minced garlic. I casually had my

appetizer, and when I was ready, I had him fire my main meal. Perfect timing. Also, my special caviar to three cheese sauce came right out with my meal, and lot of it as i asked so it covered all my bites not just a tiny dollop the manager also had me try the asian soy sauce wow yummy mixing the two also as it hits the red hot iron plate it sizzles steams yummy goodness into the air foodie aromatherapy on my chicks and shrimp okay i'm glad shrimp. Okay. I'm glad you messed that up. I was like, this is just too much. And you were getting too good at that. I was getting too...

My method of acting was taking over. Oh, my God. Foodie aromatherapy on my chicks... He always spells chicken C-H-I-X. That's why I say it like that. That's terrible. Yeah. Foodie aromatherapy on my chicks and shrimp.

Only do this if you love rich coastal restaurants otherwise just get the kind of bland reg style end of review what rich coastal restaurants is that what abz is now secrets to millionaire dining they that the secret is they all eat at applebee's i feel even more ridiculous for my weird Jojo side rant it just literally happened a couple days ago that's why it was on my mind um so yeah I think Jojo is a dude here yeah it's based on according to tall dude with cool glasses is the description I got he always rocks it he always rocks it yeah incredible incredible um I wonder how many drafts it takes. Zero drafts. You think? Publish.

Type in publish. I think he's having his wife read these. I think he's having his friends read these. I feel like he puts a lot of like, because it's a lot. But don't you think someone would say, hey, what does this mean? What is this? No, because they know how he is. They know his personality.

His personality comes through in the review, for better or for worse. And these are people that love him that he's asking about. Don't you think they say, that's not how you spell appetizer? Christina, I don't think anyone's going to question him in his circle. You know what I mean? I guess you're right. I feel like he feels like he knows what he's doing so much that no one can tell him otherwise. Got it.

All right. That's my first update. Thank you for the foodie news update. You're so welcome. I've got an update on someone that I don't even know what name I use. I'm going to use Frank. This is a review of Prestige Cleaners and Tailor in Stamford, Connecticut. This one is from episode 131

which was I think we did the Gaylord Opryland and but my challenge was from Jaron was to review where the reviewer was denied service for being too messy yes oh my gosh so this one is of prestige cleaners and tailor in Stanford Connecticut

is by Frank one star this business ruined a pair of pants and shirt of mine when I confronted the owner she Taylor in Stanford, Connecticut is by Frank, one star. This business ruined a pair of pants and shirt of mine. When I confronted the owner, she called me a mess and told me I must play with bleach all day. Refused to refund or remedy the situation. I run a small business in the neighborhood and she said

I hope your business fails as I walked out of the door. End of review. Classic, classic. No holds barred. Just wow. Yeah. Leaving it all out there. Leaving it all out there.

And this person had a history. And I read a review, a one star review that he had left. That said, I don't think I've ever posted a one star review. Oh, my God. And it was like his seventh one-star review like people can't check that yeah and so this guy is like and he's he's very aggressive do you know what business it is no i couldn't figure that out i tried i was curious because i thought maybe it's like i mean i don't want to name the business yeah yeah no i was

curious too but i didn't see anything here's a review that he left of Croce's Transmission Specialists. Oh, boy. Also, there was a weird thing where a lot of these businesses he reviewed closed or like no longer open. Well, they said they would shout at him, I hope your business fails. And he's like, oh, yeah? Just wait. Watch this.

Just wait. Maybe he owns like a metaphysical shop. He's hexing everyone. Oh, true. Or a match company. Uh-oh. Arson anybody? Arizona Matchbook Company.

That's a Palomino. It's called Frank's Arizona Matchbook Company. Oh, true. It makes a lot of sense now, doesn't it? It's all clicking. Okay, here's a one-star review. Croce's Transmission Specialists. I spoke with the owner of the shop. all it's all clicking okay here's a one-star review croach's transmission specialists i spoke with the owner of the shop he quoted me three times as much money to repair than every

other shop i had spoken to when i asked him how much he told me my transmission needs a computer alignment reprogram so the gears mesh i asked a friend who works at a dealership who told me he had never in his 10 years heard of such a thing and it was complete BS. He then tried to scare me, saying he was the only mechanic qualified in the area to do such a job. And what a monumental task it would be to do the work. This guy is a ripoff artist. He is scum and will try and take advantage of you. Do not waste your money.

End of review. Oh, my God. And, uh... Did you Google it? Tony responded. Oh, good. Okay. Here not waste your money. End of review. Oh my God. And, uh, did you Google it? Tony responded. Oh, good. Okay.

Here's the owner. You mean scum? Scum responded. That's a horrible thing to say. That's so bad, right? I didn't even like saying it as a joke. Yeah,

it's, it's, it's not good, but here's, there's a lot. There's a lot, but it was very positive. So here's what Tony has to say.

Frank, thank you for calling me after I'd responded to your review i for the record i don't see what's an original review and what's not like the original response so i assume he just said hey call me and we'll talk and then this is his response after they spoke thank you for calling me after i'd responded to your review i'm glad we spoke since i was confused by your post. From our conversation, I realized you were now considering a different repair option, and of course different pricing from the option you had originally chosen with us. When talking to multiple shops, it can sometimes get confusing.

And that term you had mentioned, computer alignment reprogram, so the gears mesh, was not part of our conversation. I understand that just the thought of a major auto repair can be overwhelming many can be confused by the differences between a transmission repair replacement rebuild remanufactured and used transmission here is a link that may help and they linked like the site that's like wikihow.com it's about like transmission repairs oh my god things to know and then he goes into like our goal is always to help as much as we can and then yeah and said i wish you well at the end so um i just think that frank is the kind of guy who goes around leaving one-star reviews and blows up at people and then like these people are like what is this

was it really that bad is this croce's place still open no see see he even tried he said i hope you do well in life and frank was like oh no no you're you're off wiping you off the map wiping you off the map with my matches and i'm pretty sure that original that original one in stanford might also be closed the one that i read oh no oh no okay no they're they're still open thank goodness that's the cleaner that's the cleaner maybe that's the key you have to stand up to him and he's too scared to retaliate true true um wow okay so a computer i like that phrase though you know that know that TikTok where people call their dad or stepdad and say like, oh, they charged me $50 for a premium air in my tires to record their reaction?

I feel like you could do this with this phrase, like computer gear enmeshment or whatever the fuck you say. Computer alignment reprogram so the gears mesh. It sounds so ridiculous, but I don't know anything. So if someone brought that up to me i'd be like uh-huh uh-huh oh i need that i believe it here is my credit card yeah i feel like that would be fun um okay so we're back at foodie news one oh thank god thank god uh now this is the review that i remembered that's kind of the the the the face of Foodie News 1 that most people

recall when they think of him. The title is okay, it's of Lucky Dog Cafe, LDC. Wait. Is that? Is that what? The calamari place?

And the title is Calamari Thin as a Hair. Oh, my God. Are you? Okay. You're reading an old one. Oh, I'm sorry. Old one.

I see. Okay. This is the original. Because I thought that was a Foodie News one as well. This is the one that people think of when they think of Foodie News one. Oh, my God. Okay. Okay.

The original. Because I forgot about that other one. But this one I thought of and then I was doubting myself. I was like, oh, maybe Foodie News wasn't that guy. Same guy. Oh, good. So we're gonna hear you sing again when in doubt it's food it is foodie news one okay it was him he was there

calamari thin as a hair question mark question mark oh god you're going oh she's getting ready why did i do this um two stars oh where oh where has my calamari gone oh where oh where can he be Oh where, oh where can he be? With his ears cut short and his tail pounded long He's as thin as a leaf on a tree I last saw him at Lazy Dog Cafe Breaded with fat running around But I just can't see him there anymore

he just can't seem to be found perhaps the man over there will know he may have seen him go by who knows where he might have decided to go but i know he's in the deep fry why oh why does lazy dog don't care that their calamari's thin as a hair oh my god this is also in paragraph form now so it's uh the breading is that of 95 fat i think that's the only line that actually has that sounds pretty good syllables that match the breading is that of 95% fat. I think that's the only line that actually has syllables that match. The breading is that of 95% fat. And they don't care it's not fair.

Okay, that's the end of the song. Amazing. Well done. You've been practicing that the past two years. I clearly have not. Remember that time when I listened to the song? Yeah. We were at home in LA and my Spotify started playing

where's my little dog what is that I was like what is she doing why is she listening to that that's so right I forgot about that I've been writing LDC now for a year or more about the amount of seafood thickness of the calamari is pathetically thin so the general public is really getting ripped off yes i even did the math from their own website compared to regular seafood websites and it's interesting in my opinion it appears that ldc only uses a finger size amount for 20 pieces covered in fat breading they might sell a lot because i agree it tastes pretty good but that would just be the breading and sauce i don't think ldc could care less and the update is as follows they listened and improved the calamari oh my gosh is that was that in the last one nope wow really it's a totally different review

lazy dogs listened to me and improved the calamari issue thanks they don't super bread the calamari but now only dust it with cornstarch this cuts down the ff fat factor a lot you actually see the seafood much more now they still could be thicker but it's good enough manager gabriel is awesome one of the most personable leaders i've ever come across at lazy dog cafe end of review um i'm just realizing sorry it says ldc i should have specified but one of the most personable leaders at ldc a very specific compliment um there was more but it's all about the flavors that carrots so i just skipped it but i love how he says ff and then has to explain what that is like what's the point of abbreviating it if

you're gonna say the full words in the same sentence yeah ff fat factor fat yeah it's this is all like kevin from the office when he like tries to shorten his language and then it just takes more time because no one knows what the hell he's talking about yes the ff fat factor ff fat factor you gotta cut down the FF, you know. Yeah. So that's that. That's a great update, though. I feel like that's...

That's an update update. We've all been wondering. Yeah. No, that's a big deal. That's amazing. The song. It was a song that did it. I don't have anything that amazing.

And I'm on to my last reviewer. Okay. Which makes up probably like 10 of pages. Wow. Wait, this review makes up 10 pages? Yeah. I have so many reviews just from this one person. Oh my God.

Okay. And that's where the game comes in. Okay. So on my Google Doc, I have at the top, it just says in bold, I wrote out, make this a weird game. And then I have pages of this guy's reviews. I'm glad you bolded it for yourself. Yeah.

Just so it stands out. So I don't forget and just start reading these. These are all in the same vein. And I'll read the first one. This was the original one. This is of Nick's Fish House in Baltimore, Maryland. So this is when we did like crab cakes in Maryland or crab houses. Crab houses in Maryland.

Crab homes. Crab homes. So this is of nick's fish house in baltimore one star review um what's this person's name gonna be uh let's do craig craig wow why can't we do carl let's do carl uh one star review max a million or whatever the name was yeah well we didn't do max did we we'll do we'll do carl okay one star of nick's fish house i don't know where nick's fish house is end of review okay oh no christina this guy's oh no i we're gonna play a game oh carl i'm gonna read a location. Oh, God. And you're going to have to try to tell me what he had to say.

Because it's all in that same vein. Okay. Okay. So Latrobe Park. Latrobe Park in Baltimore, Maryland. He must have gotten an email notification about this park that he should leave a review. What did he have to say? What do you think?

I don't know where Latrobe Park is. You think it's the exact same okay that's fair guess okay he repeats himself quite a bit so that's not a bad guess here's here's what it is one star i do not go to this park please stop asking me about it and review that was my second guess um okay i get it i get it okay and then let's see man so so many of these are so similar that I'm like I don't want to um okay how about this one PetSmart one star PetSmart in Bel Air Maryland how about he says PetSmart one star by Carl I don't own a pet I have no reason to go to PetSmart one star by Carl I don't own a pet I have no reason

to go to PetSmart stop asking me okay very very good guess here's the review one star no I don't even have a pet okay Carl I'm starting to get you Carl I see where you're coming from here

how about of the Green Turtle Sports Bar and Grill in Bel Air Maryland one star to get you yeah i see where you're coming from here how about of the green turtle sports bar and grill in bel-air maryland one star i'll tell you that this was in response same with that one how he's like no i don't even have a long time what on earth is he who's he talking maybe it's like have you been there and it's like no not for a long time one star who is he talking ever he must just be like so frustrated obviously he can't do anything on his phone because he thinks he has to keep talking to this google robot like what is it it is sad um here is one of uh towson place in towson maryland i believe it's like a shopping center okay what do you think one star i think i've been there

you have no me sorry not carl and towson maryland certainly didn't say that where is towson maryland that sounds so familiar. I have no... Why are you even in Maryland? When I was in DC, I once went to a mall in Maryland and I had to walk down the highway. No, you definitely weren't here. Okay. Well, you know I have DTD. It's like north of Baltimore.

Oh, is that what Carl said? I have DTD. I don't know if I was ever here. Yeah, maybe. Let's see. Let me guess. Is that your guess? No, no, no.

My guess is... No, maybe, no. My guess is... No. Maybe my wife went. Oh, okay. That's my guess. Interesting guess. Here's what he said. Was never there.

I don't know why just because I drive by a place you think I am there. End of review. So he's aware of what's going on. But he still feels the need to respond. Yeah. Instead of like turning off the notifications. Wow.

And then I think this one. This must haunt him. These stupid. Right, right. Anywhere he goes, it's just like pinging him left and right. To be fair, Carl, I never went there either, but I thought I did. So that's different. Here's.

So for a couple. So Homestead Flower Gardens, Inc. and Boomy Boomy B-O-U-M-I Shriners. He left the same thing. One star. Shriners. I don't know. OK.

He said. Where even is this place? No. Kind of ish. OK. at one star never heard of it okay end of review attitude i guess and then how about a masonville cove uh which i think is a trail oh it's like no it's a cove okay so it's like an outdoor like area okay okay it's a co- Okay, so it's like an outdoor-like area. Okay, okay. It's an urban wildlife- Okay. That's so stupid.

This game is so stupid. There's no structure. I'm so bad at it. No, you got that one, the pet one. That was pretty good. I was pretty proud of that one. This place has shitty trails. I don't know.

Did he actually go to this one? That's my guess. He actually did go to this one that's my guess he actually did go to this one it's one star where is that what is that i've never reviewed poor guy he's getting so and no one's responding he is just instead of responding they're like okay thank you how was the mall he's like i don't know like'm going to give you just a quick, there's going to be another game, but like, there's so many. Were there any where he went to actually? Like very few.

I didn't bring any to the table, but very few. There were so many of these. I have like, I don't know, at least 20 here. Oh my God. Of where he was just, that's what, and I was kind of just going through them. But so many said, never been there. Never heard of it um here's a mcdonald's one one star of a mcdonald's don't remember oh that's all he said so they were like

have you been here he's like slightly doubtful on that one he's like yeah you know better than i do he's like he's starting to question his own sanity um and he said like didn't go didn't go didn't go to so many places like a furniture store must be so frustrated bank uh for starbucks at one point he said drive by only like he wasn't even there uh for a shell station he said not sure where that is oh my gosh this poor guy he like walked by so many places and just left the review walked by oh one star and one star for all of these and then for one it was an amazon hub locker and he just said where yeah that's it he's like wait wait wait mcdonald's i can understand what is an amazon hub locker oh my god i actually lied there

is one there is one that i have that he did go to oh okay white marsh mall you can you can relate to this one oh he got lost um no okay it's about the generally like the type that the demographic you might see at the mall hot topic sorry sorry all right okay get getting there okay you just read it before i okay screw this up even more one star review of the white marsh mall in baltimore maryland too many young people for me to feel safe and to review oh no so sure those young people feel the same way about you old people yeah once he's finally ventured out of his he's like so scared to go anywhere because his damn phone never turns off. And then he goes to the mall and he can't even enjoy it. So sad.

Okay, I have one more. One more. I forgot all these young people. This one is one he was not at, but this is of Shabby Button LLC in Kingsville, Maryland. Am I supposed to guess? If you want, yeah. Okay, Shabby Button? Yeah.

What kind of name is shabby button he says you're pretty close see you're not that bad at this one star he says it's not comforting to me he says shabby who i was never there i barely know her should have guessed that okay that's the end of all everything i have today shabby oh my god carl i just had so much fun i going through those that guys guys like really i cannot that is a whole character now he's a character on the show because he simply does not go anywhere and yet he writes more reviews than most of us and they were like all within the same year all like two years ago like it just kept happening so he asked his grandchild to like turn off the notifications and that's why he stopped i'll teach him how gosh carl if you're listening you're probably really

upset because you don't know why we're talking through your phone but i feel like that's someone you can easily scam because clearly they're responding to everything they're getting and they feel like they're like obligated to actually answer these questions. It's like when Amazon sends like, do you know the answer? And people are like, I don't know the answer. It's like you don't have to tell them you don't know the answer. Yeah. In today's economy, saving money is like an extreme sport.

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The HappyStack, only at Kudo. Conditions apply. So more, spend less. The Happy Stack. Only at CUDO. Conditions apply. So let's be clear. When it comes to shipping internationally, can I provide trade documents electronically? Mm-hmm. The answer is FedEx. Okay. But what about estimating duties and taxes on my shipments? How do I find all the... Also FedEx. Impressive. Is there a regulatory specialist I can ask about? FedEx. Oh. But let's say that... FedEx. What? FedEx. Impressive. Is there a regulatory specialist I can ask about? FedEx. Oh, but let's say that.

FedEx. What? FedEx. Thanks. No more questions. Always your answer for international shipping. FedEx, where now meets next. Wow, Alex Zinner.

I'm overwhelmed about this. Well, good. I'm done. So now I get to relax. Excellent, because I have more for you. And Natalie sent a follow-up email. Natalie's the one who suggested this theme and sent some Foodie News 1 updates that I also had read on TripAdvisor, but just picked out some top, some favorites.

And this is another calamari review from a different place. I can't wait to see how it stacks up to LDC. Well, it's a three-star review. Is it of ABZ? It's of Blue Ocean Robata and Sushi Bar. He loves sushi. B-O-R-A-S-B? B-O-R, yeah.

Borasp. Borasp. With a Z somewhere, because Applebee's also doesn't have a z but you know it adds to it um so zushi the title is a tad better than average but and here's the review the good the sad and the muggly what the muggly i don't know what does that mean it doesn't it doesn't clarify i what it says m-u-g-l-e-y i don't even know what that's even worse i don't even know wait wait i know boras but there's not even an m in the place's name no there's not muggly like maybe you figured like we'll see if we figure it out yeah you're it's gonna be really obvious

the good the sad and the muggly the calamari was more like cal i'm sorry oh no i hope you've left your expectations at the door like the ones where you said we'll figure out what it means yeah i take it back yeah like just leave those behind. Abandon all hope. The calamari was more like, Cal, I'm sorry. Not tender at all. Small bits. Also had a gummy weird breading. Uncreative dipping sausage.

Red was okay, but the white needs work. Seemed mostly like mayo. A caper mint aioli might be better. Tempura veggies and shrimp were okay. And the extra $4 for one shrimp? And that was a typical stretched out smallish shrimp. At first I thought they forgot the shrimp, but it was hiding under a green bean. The Robata flat iron steak skewer was surprisingly boring. Not sure if it was even choice or

even marinated. I had to cover it with salt and pep. It even needed ketchup. Also, super small portion seemed like about one and a half ounces. Even local casinos give four ounces for the same price. Drinks were small and boring, especially for the dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign. On a small note, Blue Ocean's social media skills are non-existent. Four months ago, I signed up on their email club, but no response. Signed up again a month ago. Zzzzz. Even wrote them on FB.

Zzzzz. So now the good. The rainbow roll is good. Large fillings and rice. The toppings were fresh. Very popular place. Very cool modern decor. I'm sure they have sushi items that are spectacular, of course, at a dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign.

Always makes me wonder if the five-star reviews were from the ones who didn't pay. items that are spectacular of course at a dollar sign dollar sign dollar sign dollar sign always makes me wonder if the five-star reviews were from the ones who didn't pay overall the happy our menu needs some rolls and it's a tad pricey maybe we ordered the wrong stuff end of review i mean you didn't get sushi at a sushi bar um just calamari. Not that I would, but like. He got rainbow roll. He said it was good. I feel like he's trying to be like a, an actual food critic. Yes. But isn't, not that I know much about food criticism as a hobby or career, but shouldn't

you be getting their staple items and what they're meant to be like known for um probably like gordon ramsey when he does bar rescue gets like he gets what they recommend and then he picks some random ones off the menu he gets like that's i think the favorite like the most popular dish too he gets like a whole array yeah um so that's my only reference and i kind of sort of have a suspicion that foodie news one likens himself to a sort of gordon ramsay figure like a tough like i feel like maybe like a tough but fair critic tough tough but fair yes exactly yeah um with but yet he's reviewing applebees and stuff which there's a place for that sure but like the problem is okay i don't know about this place but i don't know if you're if you're bringing

that energy to a place like a giant corporate chain like applebee's yeah like that's not really that i don't know useful no it's not um but ldc know, maybe he's just riding that wave of Lucky Dog Cafe. The Lucky Dogs. And they listen to him. Yeah. They change their calamari. So maybe he does have some pull, I guess, locally. Maybe he does.

You know what? Why am I judging that? Foodie News 1 is in the house. That's a no. Where? Oh, shit. Oh, no. Oh, shit.

Please. Help. Get Leona out of here. We're not safe. Oh, my gosh. oh my gosh geo attack why aren't you barking at him um yeah i uh interesting this is this is like a very fitting update though yeah i figured it's very like exactly what you expect but you also don't know what to expect right he's full of surprises exactly speaking of which there's one more from him oh thank goodness natalie sent in and i just want to warn you

that natalie apologized as part of this is he still going um no recently the most recent ones i saw were like 2017 2018 so bummer i know well maybe not a bummer we'll see we'll see if he crops back up in the coming years yeah uh i feel like this next review is gonna make or break him in my mind aha so and based on the fact it starts with an apology i think it's gonna break him in my mind okay so yeah maybe not that i have a great opinion of him to begin with. This is a review of Bamboo. I'm assuming this is another sushi place. And not like a plant? No, no.

You mean like you think it's a restaurant? It's definitely a restaurant. Okay, good. The title is Rubber Ducky, Rubber Ducky. What? Okay, I'm glad you don't know where we're going yet. No. Should I? This one. Two stars. Parentheses. what okay i'm glad you don't know where we're going no should i this one two stars parentheses as sung by muppet ernie oh i love this song i i i know you absolutely love this song

rubber ducky you're the one okay shush what hi editing zandy here uh as punishment for shushing me while i was trying to sing my lovely tune my sister will not be receiving any background music during this review have a great day rubber ducky where are you frozen too long at bamboo third time it's happened so it's not new nine chopped pieces too tough to chew he doesn't really get wow this is not happening skinniest skinniest duck skinniest duck i've ever did see 16 bucks i don't care if it's free rubber ducky i thought you're the one guess next time i have to order chow fun. Okay, okay, ha ha ha. Maybe the half ducks are cut different, but the duck and rice duck is all bones. He didn't even like resolve the tune.

No, he didn't. What a terrible way to end. And why, oh why, do they serve the spinach cold and so plain? Is plain spinach a tradition? Or are they just totally clueless? On a good note, dang, I love the imperial rolls. Crispy yumminess and a good deal too. Anyways, what the blank?

Fix the duck. Or is it just that I don't understand duck? Oh, also, the servers are great, although it worries me that non-asian bussers don't get promoted to servers what what end of review did he just come up with that he just kind of decided i guess is that oh my here's the thing tall beth is just bussing and bussing you know and he's like wow nobody's promoting Talbeth despite my glowing review. I'm pretty sure the person not getting promoted is Handlebar Mustache Randy.

Robbie. Robbie, sorry. Randy makes more sense for that descriptor. Sorry, Robbie. That was out of left field. That completely changed the path of my mind was going when it came to this i was like oh this is so annoying whatever and then that i'm like what the fuck like sprinkle a little like weird sesame street

no at the end how we just like sprinkled in this like conspiracy theory. Oh, about, I see. About like non-Asian employees. About being racist against white people. Right. Okay. To clarify. Yeah, I assume that's what he's saying.

Well. But I don't know. Can I update you? I have another thing here. A last note from Nataliealie um who by the way called this a confusing slash demeaning by the way when he said is this just a cultural thing that they make their oh the spinach yeah that was pretty yeah well he was like oh yeah yeah he was no he was very tradition yeah so or are they just clueless y Is that what he said? Yikes. Yeah. Jesus. So Natalie wrote, it's another confusing slash demeaning slash syllabically challenged parody.

And said, I want to bring you something better than foodie news one's bullshit, though. So here we go. Beach to Sandy, you're the one. You make Wednesdays lots of fun. Beach to Sandy, I'm awfully fond of you. Oh, wait. I think that part goes awfully fond of. No.

I don't know. Hope y'all like my crazy theme. Hope the research won't make you scream. Beachy Sandy, I know you can bring this. But I do not expect you to see and i do not but i do not expect you to sing this beach to sandy i'm awfully fond of you you do me do natalie oh that was so sweet thank you natalie oh my goodness okay what a trip that was that made me feel better though i need a drink i have such a headache now good thing you have the challenge and not me sorry that i cut you off singing your rubber ducky song i just wanted

to um i don't know prove that you knew it yourself no sing the the his version yeah you prefer his version you're like don't ruin it with the real thing i don't have a good explanation why i cut you off um i just kind of wanted to get it out and get it over that makes no that's a good enough explanation um so i believe it was my challenge yes it was after the rodeos thing you really threw me for a loop i know i know i got really that was rude uh so my challenge was to find reviews mentioning ghost shows awesome okay you look how'd it go blankly um so easy yeah i figured yeah but so fun no yeah this is more of like uh i loved it because it's like it wasn't like wait because

especially with that first theme or with the theme i was like so deep in people like all these what did i call it earlier lizard hole all these lizard holes crawling into lizard holes that the challenge was like a nice like breath of fresh air yeah um so i found a few here the first i'll put that challenge who sent that in i thought you did because i listened to it and i don't think you credited anybody oh me i thought i did but i'm pretty sure maybe you did Okay, so I was wrong. It was sent in by Raven. Yes, thank you, Raven. Thank you, Zandy, for remembering that, because clearly I wasn't paying enough attention. So, Raven, thank you for sending that in.

Why don't I just read the one that Raven sent in? Let's, yeah. Because. I don't think I read his. I don't know. Okay, let me see. The title is, Didn't Even Get to Meet Zach. And this is a review of

did you write this well i thought it is a review of zach's haunted museum um and just to clarify his name is pronounced zach bagans but i'm like still in denial about that and i still say bagans me too i know and i sometimes people correct me and i i like know that it's wrong but like i instinctively say bagans because that's what I always thought it was. Yeah, like Bilbo. And then one day Em was like, that's not how you say his name. Oh, Bilbo. Maybe that's why.

I don't know. Wow, what a nerd I am. Is that what it is? I don't know. The Hobbit. Okay, so this is a one-star view of Zach Baggins' haunted museum. That does not sound right. I'm telling you.

But that's what he says in the show. Maybe it's a, what's the thing called when a Mandela effect. Of all people to actually have a Mandela effect about them, it would be Zach Bagans. To be fair, though, if someone was like pronouncing our last name like shiffer constantly and then like and ragging on us or shifer or something and being mean and then we're they're like yeah it shouldn't be pronounced shiefer i'd be kind of annoyed at them i know and i'm not even saying he's wrong i'm just saying i am i'm saying i say it automatically so i like forget to correct myself sometimes you're not sitting here like i'm gonna say it automatically, so I forget to correct myself sometimes.

You're not sitting here like, I'm going to say it wrong intentionally. Right. No, no, no. So it just throws me every time I try to say it the right way. I'll try to be good, too. Zach. Zach Bagans, Haunted Museum. And so here's a one-star review by BP.

We showed up with our reservations because right now they're only letting people in by appointment. We didn't end up getting to go inside and we demand a refund. Also, my friend is an empath, parentheses, Scorpio, and did not pick up any energies from the place at all, which makes me believe that like many things in Vegas, this place is all hype and no substance. End of review. Wait, what? Empath, parentheses, Scorpio. Okay, okay. many things in vegas this place is all hype and no substance end of review wait what empath parentheses scorpio okay okay there's so much here um first of all so the whole empath thing i didn't even want to get into it because i have my views on that but um

my understanding is not that if you're an empath you have like paranormal powers and can like gather even if that's like a true thing whatever i my understanding of an empath is just someone who is very empathetic which i feel like should be the bare minimum but i don't know um i feel like people use it as like empath is this is what Emma and I have discussed before. Okay. Okay. My understanding of an empath, it's at least a theory that I think is interesting, is that it comes from a trauma.

It's a trauma response to being able to read other people or read a room or read energy really well because you've been like you've, do you know what I mean? Like some psychologists think that's what like being an empath is it's just like a response to your and you're like hyper aware and hyper vigilant of your surroundings and that's quote unquote an empath okay but then again i also believe in energy healing and all that bullshit so i'm not the person to ask about this kind of thing um but that is one theory that's like not that's like more scientific and less like woo woo because it's not that okay i feel like the my only negative feelings about empath is just that i have found it seems like a certain type of person will consider themselves an empath

and will use it as an excuse to act a certain way and to honestly not respect how other people are feeling and make it about themselves. There's sort of like that running meme about people who claim to be empaths. And it's like that kind of, to me, negates you being an empath. If you're like, I'm an empath, so I know. And it's like, well, you're not acting like one. Using that as if it's like a special title that you'm an empath so i know and it's like well you're not acting like using that as if it's like a special title that you hold i don't know that's when it has gotten me like no i agree um so in this case when they're like well my friend empath parentheses scorpio yes

exactly the type of thing where i'm like roll my eyes like you're really gonna like tell everyone oh i'm an empath i didn't feel this place is bullshit and my theory about the psychology behind it is not that person it's like the people who actually have that hyper because what you said i was like oh interesting but it's never been presented to me in that way no and not like this it's more just for people who actually feel like they have that hyper awareness but yeah so clearly um maybe it's just empath parentheses scorpio that's the person that's the type yeah you can really like that's the wildest shit can you imagine if it said empath parentheses capricorn i don't know i'm like what what are you doing what are you talking about

yeah i'm so i i don't know i feel like can you imagine trying to get a refund too like no my what you don't understand is I'm an empath. And what you don't understand is this is all fake. This suit's all fake. So, anyway, Raven sent that in along with his suggestion of the challenge. So, thank you, Raven. I apologize that I missed... I apologize that I didn't...

I'm glad that got right in the end. ...give you credit at first. So, that's a fun one. So, these are the ones I found. This is of Ghosts and Gravestones Ghost Hunt at the Old Jail of St. Augustine, Florida. Oh, there's a good lighty there. Good what? A lighty.

It's a light home. D1 took lots of pictures for me and I was very jealous, but I was so glad she got to see it. The St. Augustine Lighthouse. Yeah. What a beautiful memory. I don't know why I was so glad she got to see it the St. Augustine lighthouse yeah what a beautiful memory I don't know why I said it like she died but I made her FaceTime me and then like she pointed the screen at the um at the lighthouse and I had a 15 minute talk with the lighthouse okay did you make her plug her ears yeah so do you count it as she did not FaceTime me while there I was just kidding oh i just made that whole thing up but did she actually send pictures of it yeah yeah no she went she saw

pictures because she took plenty of pictures um in case i want to use them for like a video or something my next question was like do you claim that you went there now no god no no she facetimed you but okay she didn't facetime you okay and i wouldn't have either. Like I need to see, for it to count and be in my passport, I need a stamp. And to get on my spreadsheet, I need to actually physically go. Right, right, right, right, right. But she gave me lots of info. And there was some great info. And like really random like signs about like there was a cat that jumped off.

It lived. Oh, thank God. Smokey the cat, actually. My dead cat's name. Did you have actually um my dead cat's name um did you have to say my dead cat's name yeah i do that a lot cool whenever i was streaming spasmophobia there was like graffiti in like the asylum level and it said smoky and i was always like oh it's my dead cat's name is it because you're an empath parentheses libra we get here okay i'm sorry this is a five star review um and it's a what the jail of the ghost hunt at the jail yes and it's a five star

so it's a redemption and it's by donnie terrifying i was looking forward to doing my first ghost investigation after watching ghost hunters and ghost adventures for so many years till I got to the old jail and the paranormal seekers began their presentation outside the jail. I laughed at some of the jokes and learned about the history of the jail, but the more they talked, the more I began to wonder if I were really ready for this. Well, they gave us equipment like you see on TV and took us into the jail to begin our investigation. I was very uncomfortable being left alone in the dark with my group in maximum security, but we all began to follow the advice of the paranormal guides and started to take pictures and do our own investigation. The first half of the tour was not bad, and I began to be comfortable in the jail, and very little activity was taking place. The paranormal seekers then took us outside for a walk around the jail to the gallows and gave us very little activity was taking place. The paranormal seekers

then took us outside for a walk around the jail to the gallows and gave us some more history about the place. The second half of the hunt then began and my group was taken upstairs to general population in the sheriff's bedrooms where the other group who had been upstairs while we were downstairs had said a little girl named Rebecca had interacted with them. That's where we started but nothing was happening so we went over to general population. By that time, I was starting to think that maybe the ghosts were quiet that night and not interested in us when from nowhere... The listener just gripped the sides of his seat.

That made me laugh. Okay. When from nowhere, we suddenly heard a loud footstep followed by a bang we knew it had come from the upper part of the general population cells so we ran to the doorway to look up and see what was causing the noise i don't know how to describe the thing we saw okay this actually kind of freaks me out was the was it nosferatu flipping the lights nosferatu this honestly is something em and i would read on the show on the podcast oh like like i got actually kind of freaked out crossover crossover i don't know how to describe the thing we saw but suddenly from next to the sheriff statue a transparent crawling thing about maybe four feet tall and walking on all fours

crawled from behind the sheriff statue heading to the cell block and disappeared before it got there. It must have lasted only four or five seconds, but all of us saw it and were absolutely terrified by it. The thing was definitely human, but I have never heard of ghost hunters or ghost adventures encountering something like this. We spoke to Scott, one of the paranormal seekers, and he said of the 17 or so known ghosts to them, this one is number 18. Which doesn't quite make sense. Yeah, I'm like, I feel like that's really intense, but I'm like, but it makes no sense. But what does it really mean? Like when you think about it, it's like sounds like a big deal, but then you're like, wait.

New ghost unlocked. It's a new one. Level 18 unlocked. New playable character. And he said of the 17 or so known ghosts to them, this one is number 18 and the one they know the least about, but have nicknamed him Gollum. He also said the never talk about him on the tour since his appearances are not very frequent. I don't know how to even describe or even forget this thing and even though the final part of the tour ended

with everyone in general population with a lot of interaction from a ghost named eugene and another named harold i couldn't stop thinking about what i saw earlier eugene harold and gollum i guess now baggins makes more sense it's all coming together holy shit you're right i recommend this tour highly but be prepared for the unexpected and truly terrifying that that would be unexpected to see that sounds scary i think m actually covered this jail yeah uh i think it was when we were in florida at a live show and talked about the crawling thing on all fours wow and now there's a review about it yeah and told the story of that thing because i will never forget the description of this like like transparent it's like a humanoid thing like

translucent i guess yeah it like crawls on all fours and toward you or whatever no i don't like it um yeah you don't you'd think i would yeah but certainly i don't yeah it. Yeah, you don't? You'd think I would. Yeah. But certainly I don't. Yeah, there's a big crawly boy right there, little Geo. Stop it. He's not transparent, though. That would be weird. That would be something else. Well, here's a review of the Crescent Hotel.

These are all places Em has covered. That's so funny. The Crescent Hotel Ghost Tour. This is a one-star review by Vicky. Where is this? I think it is in arizona eureka springs arkansas that's what i meant arizona arkansas okay it's all the same so sue me um okay springs yes so this place is this one of the earliest ones i'm ever covered well this is a one-star review by Heather of Crescent Hotel Ghost Tour.

And the title is, Don't Waste Your Money, It's a Scam. My husband and I used to live in Eureka Springs, and we decided to go on the ghost tour because it claimed to be scary and the fact we saw it on Ghost Hunters. Should have realized then it was fake because that show is fake. Do not waste your money to go on this stupid tour. They only take you through the hotel and tell you the history. Our tour guide was a wacko telling people ghosts followed him home. We didn't see anything. If you want to go on a really good ghost tour that has a guarantee that you will see something

or your money back, go to Branson, Missouri Night Ghost Tour. You will see something there. It is in writing. Don't waste money in Eureka Springs. End of review. That is... If someone someone literally it's another level of insanity said i guarantee you will see a ghost tonight it's like i wouldn't believe that and then i'd be very suspicious if i did see something of course not that doesn't make any sense also she's like our tour is a wacko talking about ghosts that That's what I'm saying.

Wait, hold on. Isn't that why you're there? Being so rude about this person talking about their experience with ghosts and then complaining that you don't see ghosts, but you see ghosts in somewhere else. And then being like this wacko. Like what? I don't know. I want it in writing that I will see a ghost. What a dumb, dumb thing to think.

I'm sorry. It's just like well you understand oh yeah no we're i'm with you here um i love how they just like threw ghost adventures under the bus though ghost hunters sorry ghost hunters it wasn't good oh not ghost adventures okay ghost hunters i don't know the difference uh ghost adventures is zach yeah zach bagans yeah um ghost hunters is that on and or something what's that on a travel channel that's travel channel then what's ghost hunters on like history channel probably oh that's that's the one on andy yes um and ghost adventures is travel channel got it got. Now I have a review of the Clown Motel in Tenopa, Nevada.

Wow. That's terrifying. Yeah. So this, I've actually seen the episode of Ghost Adventures. Okay. It's creepy. Was M in it? No, M was not in it.

Maybe, actually. It's a pretty good crossover. This place is creepy. You don't have to tell me that you're right i don't but i will and also there's a cemetery next door i don't think it's mentioned in this um but there's a cemetery next door that where there was a mining accident like a long time ago and 12 people died and so they're buried in the cemetery so even that's like adds to it it's not just the clowns it's like also right on a cemetery it's very creepy um also like the cemetery is not like a clown cemetery no no it's not i really thought it was like the most famous clowns get

buried at the cemetery you're a minor and you're like being remembered and honored in next to the clown motel like what a fucking you know i can't imagine that just try harder my life is not going in that direction right now at least so this is a we can only hope this is a three-star review by sandy of the clown motel total fun we heard of this motel through word of mouth then sought on ghost adventures so we had to go we made diy clown shirts and bought a little ceramic clown to give as a gift for their collection the motel is run down and not even three stars but if it was upgraded it wouldn't be as scary there's a cemetery next door and of course it was raining and windy which helped create the scary mood my sons both felt activity

which kept one of them up all night he He felt little bites. Oh dear God. Those are bed bugs, right? Like you're in a motel. Holy shit. He felt little bites, shivers, and we both felt something sitting on the bed. Somehow our key disappeared and then reappeared in the car under a bag. Odd. I heard a child's voice, so I thought it was my son and he was already asleep. So I told the spirits to leave me alone and I slept like a baby. If you want a crazy adventure, go, but don't expect fine linen and sparkling clean rooms. Then there's a picture of the son's arm with, not bites, but like goosebumps. And then there's a picture of them all dressed as clowns.

I love the energy of like, I told those spirits, leave me alone. And I got a good night's sleep. My poor sons were traumatized, but I slept like a baby. Just like, I know what's here. I can handle this. They've got nothing on me. So my next one is of the Myrtles Plantation in Louisiana. And this one is also a haunted spot. But this is a one-star review by Teresa.

This is a three-part stay. My girlfriends love watching movies like Taps and Ghost Hunting. Okay. Okay. Not movies. Also, Ghost Hunting, not anything. What's Taps?

Taps is one of the paranormal team investigation teams. Taps is the team that does ghost hunters. Got it. I just want to make sure I got that right. But yes, TAPS. So they want to prove that they're a real fan. I guess, even though they called it a movie. They called it a movie.

And also they said my friends are big fans. So it stands for the Atlantic Paranormal Society. Based in Warwick, Rhode Island. And they're the ones that do ghost hunters. So, take, listen, you do with that whatever you want. I think they should be based in the Bermuda Triangle. Who should be? The Atlantic Paranormal Society. That's where the most Atlantic paranormal activity happens.

Is it? You seem to be pretty confident about that fact yep this is a three-part stay my girlfriends love watching movies like taps and ghost hunting so they wanted to go stay at merle tiles that's how she spelled it what m r m r l t y l e s merle tiles it's spelled m y r tR-T-L-E-S. She just added a couple extra L's and R's. Oh, okay. They wanted to stay at the Myrtles in Louisiana.

I'm sorry. I can't take this seriously. Okay. My friend called the hotel directly. Okay. Did she? Because I think you guys are confused. And you'll see why this is all just...

It's a mess. Okay, sorry. This is a review of a plantation in South Carolina? No, in Louisiana. Oh, in Louisiana. Okay, I was confused. Sorry, that was my fault. I thought it was a South Carolina person. The one that they're discussing in the review right now

is the one they are reviewing. Yes, correct. I thought it was a separate one. I accidentally said earlier South Carolina. I probably cut that part out but yes louisiana i also was like let me pee so i made her stop that was on and then i was like i took a break and then forgot everything we talked we really it was kind of a mess my friend called the hotel directly and made reservations directly we were so excited so we took off work and made the two and a half hour trip there once we arrived we were told that we were not on the books we

asked them to check again and later found out that we canceled the room i can assure you we did not cancel the room a ghost did it oh no they got the full experience oh shit that's amazing. The Taps movie was right all along. We argued with the Hester and another black gentleman about it, but they would not back down. Finally, discouraged, we left to find other accommodations. As we were leaving, there was a group of young girls arriving. They knew the people there and they heard us griping about not having canceled the room. When we asked them, did they have reservations? They said, yes. We told them, that was our room. And they said, oh, that was you.

Sucks for you. Also, what do you mean? Yeah, what? So another person has a- As if they forgot your room? They stole your room, is what she's saying. Like, how would they know that? How would you know that, and how would they know that?

Yeah. And yeah, truly truly though sucks sucks for you what are you gonna what are they gonna do about it it was like they knew they had taken our room so basically they're like oh man that really sucks and in their mind they're like wow they're saying sucks sucks for you teenagers yeah we emailed the general manager and he was nice enough to give us a comped room three or four months later we did take him up on it we stayed in the cottage behind the myrtles the room was nice considering the outside looked like a shack there was no tv or phone but we were

there to find a ghost we did not take the tour but did walk around at night to take pictures of the ghost nothing happened breakfast was good but the front desk help was horrible customer service. Most of the time they acted like we were not there. Oh my god, wait, maybe they were the ghosts. We had a good time, but we wanted to stay in the main house, so around July we all decided to make another reservations to stay in the General Bradford suite in another room in the house. We had these reservations since July. Finally, the weekend came. I had brought with me my camera recording device,

some earrings, and other things to ghost hunt. Okay, this is... What? She does not know what she... Dude, what is happening? Some earrings. Oh, girl. All over the place.

What kind of earrings are these? They must... Maybe they're little, little like megaphones. Oh, yeah. The ghost can project through, you know? Yeah, true. Upon arriving, we had an immediate sense that something was wrong. Christina, I cannot.

When we gave them our name, they said they could not find it. We said, oh, no, not again. We told them to recheck, and they did not have our name down. I told the young black man that we were not going through this again, that we drove all this way and we wanted a room in the house. He held his hand up in my face and said, I don't have to be nice to you. I looked at my friends like, what in the heck did he just say? Then Hester, the manager, came over and told me that I had to be nice. She explained that whoever booked the room booked in October, but it was not us. There was scratched out stuff all over the book. I demanded to talk to the general manager. After waiting for about 30 minutes, he finally asked us to his office. After we were back there,

he asked what he could do about it. We did not have reservations and there was nothing he could do. I told him this is the second time this has happened. He later said that he thought we were scamming him to get a free room. Then I asked him what he was going to do and he said he would give us a free room for some garden room that was not in the house and I told him I did not want anything but he could give my friends the free room. I told him I did not want it and I was going to tell everyone what they have done. He then told me to my face, get this, that I was a liar, that I was lying about the whole thing. I asked him how he thought I was lying since he had already said this happens more often and it happened to us twice. I was so distraught I walked out before I got too mad. When I walked out, he told my friends that all offers was off the table because I threatened

him. This was not a threat. I just don't want anyone else to have to go through this. Not only did he tell us this happens all the time, we have a friend that works at a local hotel and she says guests come from there all the time because their reservation has either been canceled or not there i don't know what to tell you to do but we want to stay in the house but with horrible service and no caring by the management is it really worth the 230 a night that people pay no i think that the people there think since they are on tv they can do or say whatever they want do the owners know their employees are treating guests this way? I don't know, but I do know that it ruined our girls weekend away.

And once again, we left disappointed. Just my opinion is I think if a guest really wants to stay there, just offer more money and they will take whoever is staying off. I don't know. Just a thought. I hope the owners will contact me. The one time we did stay was fun, but the bad outweighs the good. End of review

jesus christ such a headache there's a lot of weight on that freaking review there's so heavy no punctuation it's like there's also a response from story oh gosh surprise surprise it didn't quite go as she said wow oh my god we're gonna get an explanation actually i'm glad because i was reading listening to this like this is look before I hear this. I just want to say if you're in a situation where someone else feels the need to tell you multiple people, two people feel the need to tell you to be nice. Yeah. And that you have to be nice to service like workers, employees, then you're probably not. Maybe you're in the wrong yeah potentially

if they're saying they feel threatened by you also also we say this all the time and these reviews are it's always a red flag in these reviews if you bring up the race of somebody you're speaking to repeatedly it's not a good it's not it's not good it's not why is that relevant it's not it yeah it's literally not yeah. Yeah, it's just, you're right. It's a red flag. So this is the response from the general manager. You know, the one who was in the office. Not Hester.

Not Hester. Above Hester. He called them back into the office. We opened our reservations book for 2008 in September 2007. Remember, she said we booked it in July. So like he's literally saying you couldn't have because we didn't open reservations till September. Again, though, I think maybe she's calling my little rules. We're my little not my little true.

We opened our reservations book for 2008 in September 2007. All of our reservations are taken personally and by hand. Reservations are taken personally and by hand. As anyone who has ever held a valid reservation with us knows, we give our guests a confirmation number at the time of the booking and follow up with an email that includes a confirmation number. We have requested from this group their confirmation numbers and have searched for any follow-up email. We have not to date received the confirmation numbers,

nor did we find an email. This group had not been charged for the rooms and the guests who held the valid reservations and had confirmation numbers had been most importantly our paying guests held reservations that had been made after the book had been opened for 2008 we do not use words like liar and scamming as this was the second attempt to secure a room at no cost by this group we have determined that it is in our best interest and the best interest of our paying guests not to honor their demands to, quote, throw out our guests holding valid reservations,

pay for their travel, reimburse them for babysitters, or give them yet another complimentary stay. Oh my God, I love it. So they already got a free night there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They got their little scam or whatever they're doing or their incompetence like i mean i was gonna say like most likely what it is it's right like i assume that

like something happened where they just didn't properly book it yeah yeah because if they don't have a confirmation number they never got a thing yeah they're not on the books again maybe calling the wrong place i don't know yeah i and the thing is like i don't know i it just seems it just always goes to some sort of conspiracy where if it doesn't work out perfectly in your favor or something doesn't work out you're automatically like wow they're just giving it to the higher paying ones and kicking us out yeah like give us an example of that ever actually happening at a place like this or evidence besides they said sucks for you and that means they stole our room. Yeah.

I don't know. It's just, that was ridiculous. Well, I have an email here from Becky. She heard. I forgot about the whole point of the challenge to begin with. That got. It got weird, huh? Yeah, it got weird.

So, Becky says, hey, Chrissy and Zandy. I had to send you this when i heard about this upcoming challenge m on atwwd thank you for clarifying who uh which m you never know you never know recently like james bond m you know it could it could be but like it couldn't be because this is our podcast um i have a feeling that wouldn't come up naturally. Not yet. Not yet. M on ATWWD recently spoke about the Glen Tavern Inn in Santa Paula, California, and it made me nostalgic for my wedding there. I actually knew about the venue because of the Ghost Adventures episode. I did not want my husband to know that fact, as he is not as amused by bagel bites as I am, but he was able to overlook it and agreed to marry me at the inn. We had a lovely wedding.

I was possibly touched by a ghost on my lower back as I peed in the lobby bathroom. Cool. I thought it was going to be as I took my vows. A little less romantic than that. And we enjoyed a great stay in the Houdini suite. Also somehow less weird. I know it happened in the bathroom,

but also like if you're about to get married and you feel like a ghost is touching you like are you cursed now is it a sign is probably not happy that it's happening if you're peeing it's probably just a pervy ghost yes exactly that's the end of it yeah instead of some a ghost that has something to say about your wedding you know some sort of like message or vendetta so this is a three-star view so becky sent this in it's a three-star view by jess of this place the uh with the pervy ghost yeah with the pervy ghost right three stars by jess we checked in around 10 p.m and had to call the front desk to unlock the entrance by the parking lot we were thinking this building is beautiful but creepy as hell they lock all the doors at night.

As we were checking in, I was browsing the guestbook. Holy cow, what the hell did we get ourselves into? Things like, you couldn't scare me, and definitely haunted, and traveled all this way to meet the ghosts, but none paid us a visit last night, were written in this book. A lot of the guests of the inn were from all over the world. What were they doing visiting this little inn in Santa Paula? It then occurred to me. I picked a haunted inn.

I'm like, it occurred to you then? Now? Yeah, it took you a while. The 30th thing in the book? It then occurred to me. I picked a haunted inn. My luck! I then make the mistake of googling the inn and its long history as I'm laying there in bed.

Big mistake. Apparently ghost adventures did an episode on this place. I felt like I didn't sleep all night. I literally had my heart beating out of my chest and any little noise I heard scared the crap out of me. I felt so eerie in there. I was totally expecting some ghost to wake me up in the middle of the night. I know I did this to myself. Such weird energy. I survived and thankfully no spirits showed up that night. The best part of our stay is one of my most cherished memories. I will remember this forever.

We're walking out of our room and we see two little kids playing in the hallway. They're wearing some old fashioned clothes like from the early 1900s. Hair done and all. My fiance and I stopped dead in our tracks, look at each other, and asked quietly, are we seeing ghosts? Did we just hit the jackpot? My fiancé asked them, are you guys ghosts? Then they smiled and said no and continued on with their business. They said no, but we didn't want to believe it. I was intrigued. We began to walk behind them down the hall on our way to the stairs my heart beating like it did the night before we were still not

convinced we needed more evidence they're literally following children around the hotel what are you gonna do like like punch them and see if your hand goes through them like like poke some children like don't touch them they reach the lobby and they find their adult two other people acknowledge them so now i know they're real frown face apparently they were there for a photo shoot dressed in costume that's hilarious though for that one minute we thought we were following ghosts it was such a rush loved every moment i wish i still had the photo we took of them playing in the lobby yeah y, yikes. Okay, that's a little weird.

I swear they looked straight out of those scary black and white photos of kids in the early 1900s. Would definitely stay again, maybe in the most haunted room, number 307. End of review. Okay, I'm glad that they, like, how it started, I was a little nervous. Yeah. I'm glad they had a good, and they could blame themselves for that yes and it's a cherished memory not like something yeah worth getting upset over okay good between this person and the person who was like yeah i told those spirits leave me alone and i got a good sleep

i think that those are the two like different levels yeah of like good and both three stars yeah it's like average you know that first one i feel like was that chaotic good who's just like leave me alone spirits and then and literally put a put a picture of them dressed as a clown so yeah definitely like proved that it was chaotic and this is more of like i don't know if it's neutral or lawful good it's maybe it's chaotic neutral i don't know wow because they have their own energy that's like very negative but like they at least had a positive feeling so yeah they had a good time they're just not and it's honestly kind of a funny story yeah i think it is kind of funny i think it's kind of weird they took a picture um i mean i guess if they were in costume and you thought it was a ghost i mean fair i i

bet those kids still tell that story of they this these two people were terrified and they asked us if we were ghosts and we said no they probably loved that yeah and they followed us down the hallway like yeah that's true I think seeing it from the other that's kind of cute that's a good outlook I like that funny too um so yeah that's all I have oh what a nice ending ghost hunter shows mentioned in reviews and there are so many thank you raven and becky yeah oh wow that was nice oh i have a headache um we're not announcing a theme today are we i don't think so i think we did that last time so we get it we get a week off phew we don't have to look frantically digging to look at our phone for five minutes and find something.

But we'll be back at you next week with something. I don't know. I don't remember what it was, but I think we have some good things. I need to bring wine next time because this one, this really gave me a headache. Yeah, I brought coffee. It didn't help. It didn't? No, it's, no.

I'll just leave it at that. Okay, I'll bring out Phil.