Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet - 174: Etsy Reviews

Episode Date: March 30, 2022

Listen to the Psychic Psyblings and their ramblings. And don't forget to see them live in Ohio! Tour Tickets: beachtoosandy.com/tour Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon at patreon.com/beachtoosandy! Get your toilet stickers here: https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Logo by Courtney Aventura. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Conditions apply. Welcome to Beach to Sandy, Water to Wet, a podcast featuring real reviews written by people who just need the world to know what they think. Between you and me, I wanted to like this podcast, but I'd give it zero stars if I could. Audacity is also recording. Yay. Hello, everybody. Welcome to Beachy Sandy Water to Wet, the podcast where we read the worst reviews in the most dramatic fashion. And we are on, you heard it here first, breaking news, Instagram reels. Oh yeah, I was like, my eyes went wide. I thought, what the heck? We were once mentioned in the New York Times.

Yes. We did talk about that for an extended period of time. And we're clearly still talking about it. Yeah, the extension is continuing uh up until now but i uh we are sharing now our tiktoks on instagram and i know some people said they weren't on tiktok so you can see them there too now you're so welcome alexander is doing a very good job a fine job fine okay our grandfather would say a fine job editing them gosh he would do you feel validated now i got my chest like hurts clenched when you said like as our grandfather would say i'm like did he i lived with that man for six months and i'm not i i haven't had enough therapy let's just say that

i won't let you forget it and today interestingly that you haven't had enough therapy and i wonder who to blame alexander whoner. Who should we blame? Should we blame, hmm, your therapist? No. Cincinnati Drivers? Yeah, Cincinnati Drivers. I show up to therapy this morning. It was not morning.

It was afternoon. And 10 minutes after checking in, I get called up to the front. Apparently my therapist was in a car accident on his way to see me. Oh my God. Look what you've done. Yeah. So I made a scene. i left a one-star review i said how could you i was scheduled no i um you said how selfish selfish no i was of

course like immediately they said he's okay so he's okay everybody don't worry don't panic uh apparently like that's me i hope they weren't just saying that to he was like he was like being rolled into the icb he's like tell my patients not to worry they're already so troubled that's so sad okay no um so yeah well that's why i haven't been therapized today which means you're getting getting a good episode this is the start of my therapy session i almost canceled i was like oh i don't know if I can do this. You should have canceled based on the reviews I've got for you today. I'm not even kidding.

What? I did not do something that was kind to you. Oh, no. Anyway, Welcome to our podcast. Okay, I have a feeling. We are doing Etsy reviews today. Yes. Because you famously have an Etsy shop.

It's very famous. It has 12 reviews wow so i didn't take anything from there actually if that's what you're because i looked and i was like there are no one stars yet yeah no knock on wood i was i didn't i didn't want to do that uh so yes i do it's called haunted tofu um i'll tell you more about it later okay sounds good oh oh maybe i have a redemption i could i might i maybe do do you i have a lot of positive ones me too you do well sort of like like five stars i have some five stars yeah five stars let's put it we're just all over the place so we're probably not going to do like in order of right like bad to good or are you do but mine are the

opposite excellent why don't you go first okay so i gotta ease you into this one um so i discovered you can buy a lot of things on etsy uh-huh and a lot of inappropriate things uh-huh also i found out that with your reviews you were allowed to post pictures of nudity i saw many penises real in my journey seriously so many and i just opened up is it because it's art no it's like sex toys and things and they want to show off how how they look. I saw a lot of nipples, like a lot of like nipple clamps. You know, you can customize them.

So like, say like, when you said you did something today that brought something that I wouldn't enjoy. I really thought you meant you searched like, and that's why we drink or something. No, no, no,

no. I just did very sexual stuff because i because i found out you could i was like huh i was curious so i started off tame so he never asked if he should no i did not i started off tame with like sex dice because i've brought those before and they've been really funny like goofy whatever but christina i did not expect to see this many penises i'm not i'm i'm many penises. I'm not... I was shocked. I don't know if I have any penis-related ones.

I probably do. But it was wild. So I'm going to go ahead and read my first review. This is of a spanking paddle. And here's a list of things that... So let me just read the description straight out. Some of these words are what's actually written on the paddle. So, like, when you spank, it'll leave spanking paddle daddy yes master bdsm sm ddlg submissive dominant sex

slave valentine's kitten yes sir kinky spank me mature okay i have a question please please ask away so is that so all of that is written on one paddle no some of those words are on paddles so they have a lit a variety i don't remember asking to see a photo a variety i i won't show you the bad photos okay don't worry there's some there's some graphic things i've seen i'm i was surprised so i see you can choose like your choice of like valentine's kitten or mature i actually don't see valentine's kitten as an option so i don't know how this works but i see love so on the paddles love daddy slut slave sir brat and xoxo i feel like love is a little weird like i i yeah like okay i'm just that's that's all my that's my thought goodbye good end to the thought now you can continue here's a five-star review don't worry it's very positive this is by winona

cute little paddle arrived quickly and well made. The first couple tries didn't hurt too badly, but they build. And now backside says, slut, slut, slut, slut, slut, all over it. Recommend second purchase of frozen peas. End of review. Oh, boy. Hey, it's better than Daddy M sexy kitten valentine basically an entire amazon description on your bootay yeah true um which i'm sure some people that's their thing and i'm not judging

you know no not no there's no judgment here harsh anyone's mellow absolutely not um there's judgment with the first one i have this yeah this was sent Yeah, this was sent in by Lauren Sheevey, and it's a review of a 3D Shrek pooping toothpaste topper. All the judgment. Yes. All the judgment. And this is by seller Casual Chicken. Wow, that's something.

I'm assuming this person got a hold of a 3D printer. I guess they're not running as many background checks as they should be on those things. 3D printers. I'm going to show you. This is actually from the seller page. I'm nervous. It's just a little green Shrek. It's a green Shrek.

It's amazing. You put it on your toothpaste top and it looks like Shrek's pooping out your toothpaste. That's hilarious. It's pretty fun i don't i love it there were no as far as i could tell penises in the reviews but i didn't look super closely oh and the thing is with mine i didn't have to look closely first page of reviews there were at least four penises on some of these products

how i'm not gonna ask how okay uh so thank you lauren i'm gonna read a review um actually i have two here's the first one it's a four-star review this is by sam my son loves it but the toothpaste hole gets clogged easily oh gross oh no i'd rather see a penis constipipated. And then here's a four-star review. I'm just going to read the name of this account as it is because it's just worth it. Okay. This is a review by Sacred Transitions. Oh.

Written December 23rd, 2021. It's a four-star review. This arrived ready for action. I paired it with a charcoal toothpaste and gave it to my son. Oh no. However, the toothpaste hardens in between Shrek's butt cheeks

between uses and no more toothpaste can poop out. We solved the issue by keeping a toothpick in there between brushings to keep the toothpaste nice and soft and easy for Shrek to pass. However, it is a little distressing to witness. Based on your description, I would agree. I'm glad we had that first review that basically said Shrek is constipated.

And then this one went into further detail on how to, well, not only further detail on how constipated and why shrek gets constipated but also how to solve the issue but also a problem solver and there is a photo also of uh this shrek attached to toothpaste with a toothpick deep inside of him okay you've read too many etsy reviews i really have that's all I've got for that. So your turn. Okay. My next review is of a product just titled Come Rag. And it's a towel that says Come Rag on it. That's it.

That's my, that's no, nothing else. That's in her art. Her dad listens to this. I'm just, Christina, I just, it was based on what I found on the internet. I'm just, I am merely an adventurer on Etsy looking through reviews. I just click on what comes up. I couldn't help it. It's a brave new world.

It was, yes. And I am a very, very brave man. Here's a five-star review of the Cumrag. I'm your unwilling cartographer is what i consider myself okay ready five stars my fiancee thought it was the funniest thing came before expected no pun intended and a review i didn't even think it was a pun, which I thought was pretty fun. It gets worse. How?

Just wait. Your turn. I only have two more before emails, so don't worry. You're almost through it all. Okay. This is an email from caitlin she her it's a one-star review of a thin twisted rope stainless steel necklace chain you seem very excited for this you okay the longer i wait to read this like the more time i have to

catch my you know yes true thoughts soul leaving my body just like people love these kinds of reviews that i'm bringing to the table yeah i'm sure they ask for it all the time yeah i'm sure uh this is a one-star review by allison if someone got my chain and i got your black leather i love you beefy bracelet please message me what end of review i love you beefy it's a little mix up oh no she's like i'm just looking for my necklace chain beefy i love you beefy bracelet i love you beefy how tragic that is tragic it was also posted right before christmas oh my gosh and i feel sad that i love beefy that beefy yeah didn't get their bracelet yeah so me too pretty tragic tragedy do you want to hear about another tragedy

i don't but i i i assume i must you must okay so this is an item that no longer exists thank god but here is i'm sorry are you like you don't look i don't know you don't look sorry so this one has a little bit of a mystery to it but the the purchased item is this is not good you already read the word comrade without any hesitation so whatever this is pocket pussy 3d realistic textured powerful suck vagina. It just, like, these products with, like, that Amazon style, like, title just leads to quite beautiful combinations of words. Power texture. 3D realistic textured powerful suck vagina.

Who's giving these people? That's our new merch, everybody. Who's giving these people 3D our new merch everybody who's giving these people 3d printers i'm tired of it someone needs to take a stand i'm gonna create the next uh common sense media for for this kind of behavior for etsy shops um so here's what brad has to. One star. One star. Yep. And there's a mystery too. The quality was good for the first few days.

Then it went downhill. End of review. I don't know what that means. And I don't want to know. But Brad, if you're out there, let us know. No. Keep it to yourself. Keep it to yourself, please. Please. Oh, right. I have to go again. Yeah, keep it to yourself. Keep it to yourself, please.

Please. Oh, right. I have to go again. Yeah, it's your turn. All right. This is an old email that came in a long time ago from Nina. And it's of something I own. I should not say that before I say what the product is.

Yeah, no, no, no. Based on the context of this episode. It's of cicada knobs for like dresser handles and stuff. I should not say that before I say what the product is. Yeah, no, no, no. Based on the context of this episode. It's a cicada knobs for like dresser handles and stuff. Oh, okay. Have you seen my cicadas? Yes. Yeah, okay. Those are cute.

I was so excited because Nina just sent that in and was like, oh, I found this on Etsy, this review. And I was like, I own those, those exact ones. I just want to grab the name of the shop real quick so I go credit. My mom to this day is like why do you have those giant cockroaches and i'm like they're not cockroaches they're cicadas great thank you very much so the seller is da rosa d-a-r-o-s-a and they have some really cool other oh they have little knobs with bats oh cute and rabbits and all sorts so anyway on my nightstand

i have cicada knobs because why not so this is actually a redemption it's a five-star review by ariel these are so great i just can't handle it smiley face cute get it yes i didn't at first okay i wanted to make sure we all got their hand okay the cicada drawer knobs are as beautiful as a giant bowl of steaming hot creamed corn end of review wow and as that was going that's not where i expected i did not expect corn to be the last word of this review i would argue please they're more so more beautiful than that bowl of steaming you think personally i mean yeah i it's a very personal opinion if you're comparing it to other bowls of vegetables i'd say it's one of the more appetizing yeah i guess beautiful it's more beautiful than others i think yellow is a fine color here's a picture not of the corn

that would be something here's a picture of a little cicada it looks just like a cicada isn't he fun yeah it is fun anyway oh i also have I also have a curtain hooks that are honeybees. Those are cute. I like those too. Thank you so much. Yeah. We're just talking about her interior design. I told people on And That's Why We Drink.

Remember that other day when I said, why am I getting so many TikTok followers all of a sudden? It is because I mentioned it on them. Oh, you did? And I was like, maybe I mentioned it on the podcast. And I was like, well, of course, i was like well that of course that's why it's dummy um but i promised people i would do like a little like weird shit in my house tiktok tour yeah i have not done it yeah well not even a little overwhelming there's so much weird shit i'll show you my cicada knobs yeah there you go um this is my i promise this is my i'm sorry everybody i'm sorry everybody hey i just want

to point out um he's not but anyway i am a little bit okay because just a little bit though this is my last one i only brought four that's really nice of me because i were a lot of other ones uh this is of balls and all black locking cock and ball chastity cup set. I didn't know this stuff. I think what was just so fascinating to me was that you can buy all this stuff on Etsy, which is probably cool and good because you buy it from people who like small sellers who make this stuff and I don't know, are in this community and it's not like it's featured on the homepage.

It will be on yours. It is. It literally is. No, I know. I know. It's featured on the homepage. It will be on yours. It is. It literally is. No, I know. I know. It's bad. I guarantee. I was logged in, too.

And I know this because I've once or twice searched something and it suddenly is like, I bet you want 80,000 Shamrocks. Yeah. Shamrock stickers. And I'm like, I don't actually. Thank you. And also, it's April. Why are you sending me these?

But yeah, so I bet you're, I want to say's going to say for you page, whatever it's called. Your homepage is like a disaster. I'm sure. Yeah. I mean, okay. Disaster is a strong word. It's a, it's just something that I need to sift through in order to get back to my normal Etsy-ing habits.

Don't you dare touch my shop. Don't click on it. Don't even link the two, you know? People also look at people ultimately buy this okay so this review i chose because this reminded me of a challenge we once had of um like weird brags yeah yeah you say that almost every week and you love that challenge and i still find ones because they're so almost every week. I love that challenge. I know. And you find one. And I still find ones because they're so good.

Like every week. And it's always so fitting. This is one of my favorites. And we did say we should make this a running challenge. Not about that one. I thought it was. No, that was. Weird flex.

No, no, no. I really thought that's what it was. No, we just said that about a running challenge. And it was one that I couldn't come up with good ones for. I don't know. But anyway, this is a weird flex one. So this would have fit that challenge. This is a new running challenge and it was one that i couldn't come up with good ones for i don't know but anyway this is a weird flex one so this would have fit this is a new running challenge um yes so this is very important i had to bring this this is by harry two stars it would be nice if it wasn't so tiny it would fit a twink with tiny balls but certainly not most men i know and never feel sinner what on earth are you doing i just liked that they were like i don't know any men that this would fit it made me chuckle i like theoretically

i bet there is somebody out there but not anyone i'm exactly that's what it was so goofy it was like what to mingle with like i don't run in these circles where people would be able to fit this on their penises um oh my god anyway it's terrible that's my last one i also knew that you were editing this one fully so that's part of my thought process i wrote that what what's the thought process that it would be funny to like make you edit this one what if i just accidentally edited out all of that people would probably be better off for it i promise that's the last one that i brought i'm bringing to the table the last last gross one or graphic graphic one i shouldn't say gross i'm i guess i guess like i'm super happy for all the people that have the experience i bet you there are listeners of ours who buy stuff and

i'm like listen not there's no shaming no kink shaming here nothing or any we are just clearly not the intended what i'm saying is and we're siblings must i have to listen to my brother talk describe it to me describe what to you a ball and chain for your balls i don't know i don't remember what it's called they call that a wife oh my oh my god a textured 3d vagina like must i listen to that and i must yes exactly that's that's the problem for you. That's kind of what I'm saying is like, I'm so happy for everybody enjoying these wonderful products or, you know, not enjoying them for whatever reason.

But I don't love the context in which I'm learning about them. The comedy here is not in the products themselves. It's in the situation that has arisen when a brother reads reviews of them to his sister. I just felt everybody's brow furrow and go, comedy? Where? Okay, this is from Carly, who sent an email that said, good vibes only at Sea Reviews. Oh, that's a little different. I think Carly meant impeccable vibes only.

Oh, yeah, like my shirt like your shirt but that's okay um to think i did this brought this to the table for you after all of that i guess carly did but i'm taking credit it's a mug that reads i just really really really love lighthouses okay oh my god it's perfect here it's perfect for me too yeah so me too you're welcome don't deserve it but the seller is two funny moms all one word and this is a five-star review by hannah my mother obsessed with lighthouses, adores this mug. However, she did say it needs a few more reallys. End of review. Oh, reallys.

I was like, what are reallys? I agree. For my, for Condi's sake, I wish it had been a four star review and that she literally gave it four stars because it didn't have more words when it already has. How many reallys does it have? It has three. Three reallys. Yeah. That doesn't have as three three release yeah

that doesn't quite sum up my feelings about lighthouses but i get it i get that some people just don't feel as strongly it's only three release strong yeah mine's like at least five yeah so um i feel like that's a very informative review you and uh hannah's mom have something in common i wonder if she's single the mom anyway it was a joke yeah i know it was really funny okay i have an email now okay so you can't be mean or unhappy with me just this person um this person who i'm going to call l as in the letter this person who I'm going to call L, as in the letter. L thinks that we are, quote, a hoot and a holler. What? Thanks.

Yep. And here is... I'm going to read a couple, and by a couple I mean three, of these products called Balls for Crocs. Oh. They're like, you know, truck nuts. They're like truck nuts, but for your crocs. So they're like literal, they look like a ball sack, and you clip them to the but for your crocs so they're like literal like they're like they look like a ball sack and you clip them to the back of your crocs that thing that goes you know how you

can go into sport mode by moving that thing i i don't own crocs but i'm just familiar with the culture should i own crocs should you i don't see why not i i mean is that a thing like should i own them or a little sister owns crocs so yeah but i feel like she doesn't wear them anymore and i don't know if it's like it's not yeah i think she does is it cool still i mean i think they're just really comfortable are crocs cool i know but so are sketchers don't ask google if crocs are cool that's not gonna help anybody okay so bloomingdales has balenciaga crocs with a heel yeah oh you haven't seen those like seriously yeah in your closet i did

no no they they have like crocs i think are still technically kind of cool to some people i remember when uh jenna marbles was like tie-dying her crocs and i was like damn i guess they're cool because when i was little like the like if you wore crocs in front of anyone like you were gonna be socially suddenly an outcast um no they've gotten they've been cool for a little bit i mean i wore pilgrim shoes and those never became cool i'm still waiting yeah because they i don't know they had a buckle and they were probably weren't nearly as comfortable they were good for my back and you couldn't customize them quite as much like you can with balls for Crocs. You could probably hang the balls on the little pill.

I don't know, Christina. I don't know. I'm not sure about that. Tell me if I need Crocs, everybody. Okay. Tell her if she needs Crocs. So here are the reviews of balls for Crocs, okay? balls for crocs okay uh this is by uh this the person who makes them is palmenes palmenes industries p-a-l-m-e-n-e-z industries just google balls for crocs or don't or do if you want them

or do but or don't here's a five-star review okay if you ain't shit, get out the pit. A-yeet! My boyfriend was very impressed with these. End of review. What? My next one's another five-star review. What does it mean? Crocking balls. It couldn't get better than that. Make it stop.

And here's a third review. Five stars. A great gift that I bought for my little sister. She's 15. I'm sure she will love them and wear them all the time. End of review. She's 15! francisco wore those over to my house i'd be like get that out no no no no no no no um you know i have an email here from olivia she her and the title is Nuts for Crocs. And I hadn't read it. Oh.

But I remembered seeing it. And I thought, that must be the same product, right? And indeed. I just clicked on it. And I actually now have a three-star review. Amazing. Let's see. So Olivia says, I was browsing Etsy for charms.

I want to get tiny matching charms for myself my boyfriend and dog and cute and came across this interesting i guess the dog is crocs i don't know where you put i guess i think dogs they have dog crocs hold on a second this is i'm learning so oh my god alexander did you know leona has Crocs? No. Renee got them. Oh, cute. Those blue ones. And you were wondering if they're cool? That's clear that means that they're cool.

What? I know. Oh, ridiculous. Okay. Okay. Here is a review of a dissatisfied user. This is a three-star review by Ian. user this is a three star review by ian this item is supposed to be flesh colored and they look pink like a light salmon color i previously owned a black pair and was happy with their color and

quality end of review not fleshy enough and like looking at the pictures that i have in front of me there's some fleshy ones. Like they look fleshy to me. That is very fleshy. I would say. The one on the right. I would say. Yeah.

And they have different skin tones. Like they have 16 different colors. My oh my, that's a lot of colors. So you can match your Crocs. You can match your actual skin tone. Please leave your dog out of it though. Or don't. I don't know.

Well, I feel like it would be triggering if the dog were neutered. Oh, true. Or maybe it's kind of symbolic. Like, I don't have these on my body, on my belly, but I have them on my Crocs. Look out. Look out, world. Yeah, world. Yes.

And walking through like this. Like how dogs walk when they have shoes on oh it's so it's so great yeah especially with the balls dangling especially oh boy so here is one of those situations i think i think it's it's able to be explained this is an an old email. This is from Maya, who sent in an Etsy product and wanted us to read the description because it's wild. It's one of those that I'm wondering if it's just like they pulled keywords or something. You know how those t-shirt things? That was a scary website.

No, it's creepy. So this is an etsy one though uh let me read the um the product is shimmer deeper red copper neck ties men ties metallic tie red groomsman wedding satin rose gold copper orange metallic wedding so they're tied it's a shiny wedding shiny wedding ties uh three different colors um in like kind of this like may tap metallic metallic oh they pose it next to one of those um moscow mule copper copper mugs yes um because it's similar color so it's those colors metallic-y like kind of like like a just like a copper a rust it's like a copper love it very autumnal but yes quite quite so oh no i just looked up what i thought i would do some sly online shopping while we recorded what did you find i googled crops crops instead of crocs you're gonna go buy crocs and you

bought you went to crops i was looking up at you copper crops and all of a sudden national geographic society and there's a big picture of a cornfield um oh creamed corn in a bowl it's all coming together and so and so i think that's the universe saying please pay attention and don't don't google crocs what you're yes trying to do a show listen to this beautiful now that i'm you if you had been doing this for my first four reviews i would understand but come on this one is not even that bad i wrote buy crops, you did not. Yes. That's terrible. Okay.

Okay, so I've decided also to read these in a very, I mean, dramatically is kind of just what we're supposed to be doing. So, but like this one has some energy, I think. So, needs some energy. Excellent. Just what I need. And the numbers are like, they have, each tie has a different like number assigned to it. So, when I say like, it starts with number 246. So the color, basically. Yeah, it's like the different shade.

So here we go. Number 246, deep copper as original. We thought it's the deepest shade of copper we could find at that time. Very first beginning of our rose gold copper necktie similar to data or information considered as raw undigested and innocent of a certain purity and naive in all pieces of information

that have deeper layers so if the customer perceived from name deep copper as a dark shade then it isn't but if need indeed deep deep shade, number 431, 432 would be delegated for your preferences from dark to light, respectively.

So all depends on what to compare with. Number 246 seems to be the closest when compared with the mule copper mug. That's the first paragraph paragraph that's one paragraph that reminds me of when somehow i got placed in a philosophy uh course like a special honors course when i started college and you just bullshitted your whole way through absolutely and they were like here's some texts by kant and i was like I don't understand any of this. That's kind of how I would like read it at late at night because I procrastinate and it'd be like two in the morning. And I'm like, you know, when you read the same sentence over and over and it still doesn't make sense. That's kind of what you analysis of kafka's metamorphosis that i thought i did much better on but in hindsight i was like i'm like yeah you know it probably sounded a lot like this

just a lot of nonsense you did this for fun you did this for class sorry i didn't it was a class philosophy class i see yeah why did we do that why it was because college required me to take that class what do you mean what i don't know i'm just you think i was doing that for fun i did yeah he said why um well because i had to i don't know um that does sound like me though okay um do you want another so and also i brought up those t-shirts, but with this, it feels more like a Google Translate issue, which makes it amazing. But partially because it seems relevant. It doesn't just flow into something completely unrelated. It keeps coming back to the same keywords.

It keeps coming back to the same keywords, but it sounds like somebody translated this to English, then to Greek, then to, I don't know, Hebrew, and then back to English, and then to Simlish, and then back to English. Because none of this really makes much sense to me. Yeah. I'm going to... This one's good. Um, it starts out slow, but it's worth it. Okay, ready? Number 431.2, copper orange as balance, yet seems less orange for some or too orange for others.

That is so not helpful! Isn't this amazing? That much I know was probably translated at least somewhat correctly, and it's still... Now that I know what it means... This is originally bullshit. It also means nothing you know as it seems to sit in between number 246 and number 432 as shown in under natural sunlight and artificial led light box though seems like proper equilibrium at a specific point if the balance is considered as neutral in almost every way like generalization for many don't take either side could be assessed as forsaken, may be satisfied yet stern and lukewarm in a certain context, without firm foundation from the root source, hardly bear the fruit in the long run. anywhere as it wishes without anchor though may float on the water yet still could go any direction as the wind blows so as understanding and knowledge from facts or theories that can be altered along

with supporting documentation as evidence with some experience is that supposed to mean whatever floats your boat and they just literally i think so that's what's so wild is or they're using in their native language some sort of saying idiom an idiom that doesn't translate well into english which we've heard a million times with parents german parents who say these idioms and you stare at them and think what the hell are you trying to say right now i always say that they say it's between 234 and 436 if your boat floats with the wind in a certain direction. And I'm like, dad, that again, I don't understand. So that one, that one was pretty good.

Oh my God. I'm going to do one more. This is like the last part. Okay. Most of the customers understood well, yet still due to misunderstanding from reviews or convos of color name and perception of the color shown on the screen with different lighting conditions of our ties, we just want to clarify how these ties are inspired from many things in our definition and experience. Oh, I'm glad they're clarifying. Yes, you're finally getting some answers.

My first comment was going to be they can get the word convos, but they can't really get anything else somehow. And I'm glad to hear that's what they're doing instead of clarifying. I wasn't positive. Here comes the rest of the clarification. For many things, I'm just like, I can't sum up what I've said. You can't. So here we go. things in our definition and experience which is subjective along with preferences but applied from iso-iso-iec-17025 testing and calibration laboratories and in the context of when the

source is equivalent to truth doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter end of description wait that's the end yeah out of nowhere it's like doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter that's what you think it's out of nowhere but in reality it actually makes a whole lot of sense true uh at least to the person writing it yeah that's a bible quote by the way it is james 3 11 oh i think they meant to do the other one doth the fountain send forth from the same opening sweet water and bitter i know but isn't john 3 oh 3 16 i was wondering wait what is james 3 11 i think maybe they got them i see that all over the forever 21 bags um we should probably throw that in somewhere kind of the wrong like what

were they thinking there what were they thinking i mean what what does that have anything to do with this i kind of take back what i said earlier about the philosophy because now it really is all out the window like eventually i could usually get a hang of that but this sounds more like i listen to a lot of weird podcasts but this reminds me of when you get some sort of alien communication and it's like could it mean something yeah i feel like it sounds like something kind of smart but then you're like but no but it doesn't make any sense like it's sort of like how we talk big words yeah i'd say like some erudite yeah um and you think the aliens are communicating through these ties on no alexander i didn't say that although now i know i know i kind of do

yeah it's uh do you know what i mean like it sounds like as if something's trying to communicate with us using our language yeah perhaps an alien a legal alien who immigrated alien no and and a damn it a legal i was trying to imply that when i said alien i meant a foreigner someone who doesn't an immigrant right an illegal one no why do they have to be illegal i thought that's what you said no i said a legal alien oh gosh anyway we're not supposed to call people legal or illegal anyway because it's ridiculous i know i was just trying to i literally have a sign in my ear that says that so before anybody comes at me and goes you you shouldn't say that. I was just trying to. I was trying to provide context to my joke.

Yeah. That didn't land. I thought it was pretty funny. And I was actually thinking of the song by, is it Genesis? Nevermind. Okay. Oh, they're called gibbets. The things that you put on Crocs?

Mm-hmm. Okay. Not on Crocs. Not on Crocs. Christina, it's your turn. You could put those little ball ones on i'm gonna shop for crocs while you give me a review oh they have a cute like rain yellow rain boot they have one called thick filet what thick filet that's so stupid i know

okay i'm gonna get you this one. Not really, because you're vegan, but... Oh, I don't know why I sent you the link I meant to send you. Yeah, she also has a big Chick-fil-A sign in her yard, too. That's weird. She, like... Well, she plays both sides of most issues. Oh, my God.

It's literally just a... Where is that? Is that on... Oh, that's on Etsy? Mm-hmm. It's literally just a where's that is that on oh that's on etsy it's literally just a chicken wing i'm sorry if you go to it there's like 12 different types of food you could order no thank you wait i'm waiting i'm gonna read you the title i've been waiting clog charms chicken wing shrimp salmon abalone sausage dumplings egg clog charm accessories for women girl adult gift wow that's Clog Charms Chicken Wing Shrimp Salmon Abalone Sausage Dumplings Egg Clog Charm Accessories for Women Girl Adult Gift. Wow, that's quite the mashup.

Yeah, so if you want anything... Are you reading a review from this or are you just browsing? I thought about it, but there aren't any good ones so far. Here is a review of Brown cowboy cat hat for cats brown cowboy cat hat for cats yeah by arista cat hats wow um and i believe this was also sent in by carly it's a five-star review by madison and you'll be pleased to know has an accompanying picture. I'm so pleased already. So you know how when you're leaving a review on Etsy or when somebody leaves a review, it has an option where it says like style and then you can. Yeah.

So that the readers know which version they picked. So the option here is add bolo tie question mark. And this person purchased hat and bolo tie. Oh, okay. That's so cute. By the way, it is. It is. This was perfect. My cat is now the rootinest tootinest cowboy in the West.

Thanks to Aristocat hats. My cat even has an accent now. He says meowdy instead of meow. This product is 100% worth it. it yes please get one for your cat how fun is that juniper would claw my eyes out yeah marco would not be pleased i feel like i want to get him one that would not end well for me but if your cat is one to wear stylish clothing and oh it is adorable stop it that is so cute i know it's like even better than i imagined the bolo tie a little bolo tie that's so cute very sweet what the heck i want it do these hat

cats wear hats because i feel like that could be a really fun um well i watched one of them scratchy last week so maybe not i was so excited to see him too he was excited to see me that's why you scratched and bit me, I swear. That's what Dee said. Ollie loves me. At least in front of you. Shout out Ollie and Casper. Do I have another one?

I don't think so. Sorry. I read all my crock nuts ones, so I'm good. Oh, that's okay. I only have two more in there. Nice. Redemptions. I'm so relieved yours are over, Oxnard.

I can't even begin to tell you what a weight off my chest that is. I'm so glad. Okay. So this is from Elon. He uses they, them pronouns. And it's a product called Chicken Daddy's Wall Calendar 2022. Who is this Chicken Daddy? Chicken Daddy's.

Multiple daddies. Sorry. So I thought it was possessive. Oh, Chicken Daddy and his calendar. calendar so i thought it was possessive oh chicken daddy and his gal yeah i thought it was chicken daddy released his calendar you'll be pleased to know it's multiple chicken daddies it's plural augsner are they chickens that are not being exploited well i appreciate their daddies oh surrounded by chickens oh okay here i'll send you a photo since our text sheet is already screwed up man i was hoping we'd end on that that picture of the kitty with the cowboy hat yeah you don't have to look past whatever this what in the world is this

you really should have known better okay this looks amazing actually isn't it fun it does look fun okay i'm sending you one more and this is i love how in this one they've posed the calendar with amazing like a beautiful bunch of lavender uh in a sort of kind of okay this is incredible cabin chic this is aesthetic um just really stylish i'm sorry for being so... It's a star seller out there. So yeah, I would be nice. And also this is a bestseller item. And the seller is called Chicken Daddies.

One word. Okay, I was hoping that Chicken Daddies were selling their own calendar. Yeah, there's also... I've just found one called Chicken Mamas. Oh! I feel like Chicken Daddies is kind of like chicken how am i gonna pick chicken it's just women in gowns holding chickens yeah and these daddies are dressed like it this seems very like this is amazing it's so fun this just is fun exactly oh my god wait oh i love it they

have their names down there okay this is really is really fun. Anyway, so Chicken Daddies. When you first said daddies, I was like, uh-oh. But then I'm looking at it. I mean, it seems very wholesome. It's very wholesome. Just so you all know, this is all very wholesome. It's not like Alexander's Reviews. I was on a different side of Etsy.

No, this is amazing. And so I'm going to read you kind of, here's the collections that this gift is featured in. Funny gifts, gag gifts birthday gifts weird gifts chicken gifts so if that's something you're looking for is that gifts for chickens or gifts that are you know i think that's kind of up to you to decide oh okay uh either or maybe this is a five-star review by leslie i gave this to my stepfather for his birthday he loves it and hangs it in his office at work he also applied to be in the 2023 calendar that's how much he loves it quick

shipping and good quality end of review amazing and elon said in their email uh that so many reviews were like oh i want to get my insert yeah male relative or uh acquaintance to apply for this oh my god wow people have a lot of chicken daddies in their lives this would be i mean this is incredible i would be it would be an honor to be featured so i know i hope i hope some of those people succeed in getting their um relatives in there that also would be perfect for that one challenge of uh a review of where someone knew somebody oh my goodness oh well my whatever was in this in the chicken daddy's calendar and also like photo on the wall i mean literally in a calendar wow y'all go check out chicken daddies i'm obsessed with it and i'm sad that it's already almost april because i feel like i would have had if i get this calendar i have to skip oops

i have to skip a few months they also sell um posters okay so if you just want to be around something yes one chicken daddy stands out to you exactly exactly and you can apply yeah for the next calendar how fun you got one more for us? Yeah, this is from Jessica Sheher. It's of a keychain. And I don't know what the keychain is because they have a lot of different ones. But the title of the product is Colorful Rainbow Character Items Keychain. And the shop is called Wooden Button Boutique. And this is a five-star review by leanne i love this keychain it is

imperfect but that's okay because i started taking zoloft this year and little things like that don't bug me anymore oh end of review amazing and if i have ever related to one review, it's this one. It's this one. I'm like, God, I get it, girl. Yeah. And that realization after you start a medication or make a breakthrough in some way. And then you have this realization like, wow, X amount of time, like a month ago, have tilted me into exist like non-existence non-existence thank you no 100 i i had that moment where everyone's like oh no here they go again

yeah but i had that moment where i was getting on an interview or a call and it was such a minor thing but i used to always just get like fully like i would have to sit up here for 10 minutes and just like breathe beforehand because I'd get so nervous and it was like just a meeting with people that I already knew it was you know it wasn't anything high stakes let's put it that way um and then one day I ran upstairs grabbed my water sat down did the meeting and halfway through the call I was like oh my god I haven't like had to tell myself to like count to 10 while i'm breathing yet it just happened and then i totally chill yeah so anyway i love that review if you're

considering um you know going to seek help for anything let this be your sign from the universe yeah oh i i lied i do have one more kind of it's just a review of a little shop called a little shop of horrors called haunted tofu oh wow i hear great things about it yes thank you 12 people really enjoy it uh destiny i just checked to see what was going on there were 12 ratings and this is the one review that was there with a photo oh i'm so pleased that's so amazing oh i'm so pleased destiny posted her yeti cup with uh and had had you had bought the design please don't pet my peeves sticker and put it on their yeti big yeti mug i love that and it was so nice and i i just was like so pleased that makes me happy good so anyway that's all i got that's

lovely what a great end. For once. Yeah, right? Actually, though. So before we get into your challenge, it's your challenge, but we received an email regarding last week's challenge for me. And it was... What was it again? I'm like trying to remember the exact one. Where were we when we did it?

I mean, I know where we were. We were here, as always. But were we... Is this before we traveled or after? I have no idea. Okay. I'm just kidding. After. Because it was right after we got home.

Oh, yeah. Em was downstairs. This one is about the Johnny Damon book. So it was where someone. Oh, my God. The baseball. Yes. So what was the actual challenge?

My brain is not working today. It was that they said they were there. Like a fish concert. Oh, yeah, yeah. Where they were at an event. No, Pearl Jam concert. god the baseball yes so what was the actual challenge my brain is not working today it was that they said they were there like oh yeah yeah where they were at no pearl jam concert yes exactly so in this case the reviewer left a review of johnny damon's book yeah saying hey you're wrong like this you didn't hit a home run here you hit uh um i think it was a ground rule double or something. I don't know. Something. And we said, hey, if that one person who. Whose stepdad likes baseball. Yeah. Interests like align.

The unlikely Venn diagram. Yeah. And then here we go. We got an email from Mike. Mike says, hello, she for siblings. I've been a listener from the beginning and a longtime listener of atwwd uh found atwwd through the crossover with wine and crime actually what what a journey mike and his wife were able to meet you and m at one of your live shows do you know when where la la yeah oh cool so yeah

and mike says apparently i'm the one fan who crosses over between great comedy oh and baseball history i happen to have the johnny damon book on my bookshelf no he's not a red sox fan but he does have several books about their history in my library moment though where he was like wait wait what and we what? And we're like, do you have that book? And he's like, I'm looking at it. Yeah, isn't that great? How cool. And then this is my favorite part. I'm sure you've already received hundreds of emails from fans on

this, but just in case I wanted to send this along, Mike, I promise you I searched our email. This is the only one I could find was yours. Mike, it's just you. And I've been watching the emails come in. and so the moment i saw yours i threw it in my folder i read it through my folder i'm like yes and i haven't seen one since you know what's so funny what is that so many times yeah no we love getting emails

always send them keep sending them don't ever like hesitate but like sometimes when there's like a meme or something that we get 8 000 times and you know, you know, you do see the people who write in like, you've probably seen this many times. And it's like, oh, that's fun. They like clearly know. This is not one of those times. No, this is not one of those times. So long story short, the reviewer was correct.

It was, in fact, it was a walk-off double and not a home run. Wow. And he included baseballreference.com saying that the full game, like the play is available on there. And you can see the full game replay actually on YouTube of that game. He says, to be honest, the errors on play by play and game by game recollections in most baseball memoirs are spotty at best and have been for as long as they've existed. And some more information because Idiot was the name of the book was like called Idiot. I was like, why are you saying that to me?

Beating the curse and enjoying the game of life. Apparently, it was a reference to the 2004 team nickname. Red Sox had heard for decades about the curse of Babe Ruth and the year before lost a really awful playoff series to the Yankees. The Red Sox lost the first three games to the Yankees in the 2004 playoff series and everyone started talking about the curse so Johnny Damon said something like we don't know about all those other teams we're just a bunch of idiots and so then it became his thing I guess what a fun thing yeah right to acquire and then he says anyways this is way too long already but I could talk baseball all day which made me so happy and excited you realize how dumb i am because you really could call me the idiot here because obviously blaze would know this or at least have some sort of context not know this specifically but like blaze's brothers and

father are like massive baseball fans but i didn't bring it up to him because he's a Yankees fan. He is a Yankees fan. But I do love that Mike specified that he's not a Red Sox fan. Yeah, I feel like Blaze and Mike could really hang out. Yes. Like just the crossover here alone. I think Blaze and Mike are in the Venn diagram. Yes, they're in the same.

Yes, you're so right. There's nobody else. I like baseball. I follow the Redss i love the reds no i know but like the venn diagram of our listeners who oh yeah i don't listen to our podcast no you don't so yeah okay never mind i'm not in this i'm only in the baseball side not the fan of beach to sandy's but who have like these kind of random statistics and stuff like yeah his dad worked at espn like they probably own this book if it's at least

somewhat well known you know yeah i could totally see that but yeah and then said hopefully this was helpful and said if not i at least made you read a really long boring email as punishment for your bangles beating my titans in the playoffs that's what this was all about it was all about that mike appreciate you thank you so much this was one of my favorite emails ever because yeah like so specific so niche and literally the only one so far I had some other people might write in but like so far this is the first time and it just made me so happy like knew about it wasn't just like oh I found this on my dad's show and included a picture of the book and the page wow so thank you Mike seriously so helpful yeah I just feel like um even demographically we don't

i feel like sports fans aren't a huge crossover topic with our listeners necessarily yeah it just isn't like i mean it's not just you know um and so it's just kind of cool to like we made the call and within a week right it was like a couple days it was like so soon after too oh i'm so so shout out mike thank you so much shout out mike's wife as well hello and they live in la i'm assuming i don't know titan's fan went to a live show in la mike is an enigma mike is an enigma listens to and that's why we drink yeah we don't have sports fans listening to that either he must have liked blaze's episode because it was all about sports and that's what i'm saying

is when he said i could talk about baseball day i'm like yeah we had to do you know we had to cut we i mean eva and our and that's why i drink had to cut like two hours of blaze just talking about sports what i'm not making that up the episode was like four and a half hours long initially holy fuck yes yeah so um i know you like baseball but like i feel like blaze and mike need to be put away i can listen to baseball i definitely can't talk about it that much listen about yeah yeah i mean it was a lot shall i do my challenge yes it's your challenge now what was it again callie sent the challenge uh callie uses she your pronouns thank you callie and it's to find reviews of flasks or hidden alcohol containers where the person is upset

that their alcohol was caught how did that go uh it was good it was fun i honestly had a good time with it so this is interestingly had like the same products for that like i looked at a ton of products but it seemed to be the same ones that kept causing problems oh okay this could be a fun game. I love games. Out of picture on Amazon, you type in like fake flask, fake item flask to like bring into a live event. What item do you think? Can you think of any ideas of what there might be, I guess? Because you obviously, you know, Hennessy and sunscreen. Yeah, I know putting Hennessy in a sunscreen bottle. Right.

I know about wine brasy in a sunscreen bottle. Right. The classic. I know about wine bras. Wine bras. Sure. You know about my tampon flask I used to have? Okay, I saw at some awards show, I think it was like Guillermo from, is it Jimmy Kimmel? Yeah. Had, I think it was him, had a microphone that had a flask in it, which was funny and would like give it to like, these like celebrities would come up and then he'd like. I feel like I saw that. Yeah, it was him had a microphone that had a flask in it um which was funny and would like

give it to like these like celebrities would come up and then he'd like i feel like i saw that yeah yeah um i'm trying to think what else like what you would bring into a venue kind of thing like a a pocket knife which would probably get confiscated um but like a self fake cell phone that's a little extra like that's probably too much. Like it's some sort of key chain thing. Let me tell you, first off, why don't you guess what occasion people are trying to sneak booze into the most, at least based on the reviews I found, the most popular occasion situation that people are trying to sneak their booze into movie theaters is it music concerts like festivals weddings no that's fun though wow i'm into like a bar like some

place where you alcohol is expensive a sporting event you were onto something sporting event not sporting event place where alcohol is expensive yes huh so so sporting event? You were onto something. Sporting event? Not a sporting event. A place where alcohol is expensive. Yes. Huh. So a sporting event? But I mean, yes, all these, sure, but not the main one. Where's alcohol expensive? It runs rampant.

What? I know. I can't even think of something. Like to the point that there are brand names of these items based specifically on. Am I going to feel really stupid when you say no you're gonna be like god damn it like cruise cruises no fucking way yep i was trying to avoid it i had in my head i'm like i don't want it to be cruises uh are you shitting me i'm not there's literally like entire brands dedicated to sneaking booze onto cruise ships i mean yeah that makes sense

because i assume that the alcohol is really expensive and where else are you going to get it i guess when you dock somewhere you can try to but and some of the products product descriptions even said did you know that on a cruise they will not deliver cocktails to your room you need to go out and get them apparently like they don't bring alcohol to your room and so that's another reason people want to sneak on booze so they can drink in their rooms um man i've been on tiktok i've been on like random i'll get random cruise tiktoks and everyone i see makes it seem so much fun so much fun okay but like and then like i hear stories and i think that doesn't sound fun but

yeah this person on tiktok made it seem no i have that same thought and like sometimes i tell myself what if we did a cruise but it was just like we didn't go and like what if we you know what we should do what okay y'all buy tickets to our live shows because then we can market ourselves to a cruise line right and do a live show because they need performers. We can have a comedy show on a cruise line. Yeah, but that's, again, that is just the whole thing all over again of now we're on a cruise and probably the toilets won't work and maybe we'll all get ill. Yeah, no, it's probably not.

But we'll probably get paid, so I'd hope. We'd get paid, but I feel like as someone who lived in LA and had a lot of friends who did cruise performances, you don't really get paid that much. But, you know, Jim Harreld does the Paranormal Cruise. We could do like- What? Yeah, every year. Let's do that. I don't know what to do, but let's do it.

I don't do- That sounds interesting. We're the psychic siblings. Oh my gosh, we can just do Mind Meld all day. We could do Mind Meld. Actually, I was going to ask if you wanted to do that let's do it i don't do that sounds interesting we're the psychic siblings oh my gosh we can just do mind meld all day we could do mind meld actually i was gonna ask if you wanted to do that on tiktok yeah let's do it okay also psychic siblings is spelled p-s-i-b-l-i-n-g-s people gonna be like siblings what is this it's psychic siblings psychic siblings and then they're like oh is that your last name And then they're like, oh, is that your last name?

And then we're like, oh, this? This is just my conditioner and it does not have tequila in it. I was like, where is she going with it? She's like holding her hair. This is my conditioner. I'm like, what the fuck? Oh, is that a common thing to put it in? That was the product.

Conditioner and shampoo. And that's why I realized you weren't guessing it because you were looking at, you were thinking of sporting events. Where you wouldn't bring conditioner. Right. And so, but the big one for cruises is shampoo conditioner. Because like everyone's packing. Yeah, makes sense. Everyone's packing, you know.

And so here's one, for example. Fake. Here's a product on Amazon. Fake shampoo and conditioner bottles by Cruise Runners. That's the name of this. It's sort of like Rum Runner. Yeah. That's fun.

Which is a different brand. Don't get it twisted. Fake shampoo and conditioner bottles by Cruise Runners. Hidden liquor, sneak smuggle, alcohol, flask kit for cruise booze bags rum runners okay so basically i just wanted to read to you some of these shampoo bottles this one's called essential organics it actually does look relatively realistic like i wouldn't know right off the bat i'll send you a picture of it uh so they just send me you just sent me chicken daddies again like is this she's joking now you sent me chicken daddy's link that's different

why was that copied huh i sent you that earlier no you didn't send me the link you sent me photos how did that happen i don't know oh wow okay this is this is a christina what this is something right this is a whole kit yes holy shit did you not hear me say you said a lot of words there it's a sneak smuggle alcohol flask kit like forgive me for not hearing the word this is intense essential organics essential organics hydrating shampoo intense hydration protein-free conditioner for verse versatile hair styling uh it has a coconut and some kiwis on the front and a palm leaf for a frond it even has those stickers yeah well that's a very important part the seals on the shampoo like that when you open the bottle yep wow so sometimes they they send you the seal so that you can

make it look like it's never been opened uh that's so wild which is pretty wild so this is the kind of thing that was extremely popular online i actually see a really cool one here um that's one of these like ice packs for a cooler oh wow fill that with oh my god that's pretty ingenious if you ask me this is wild um so anyway let me read to you some reviews so this one is of this one's called hidden flask shampoo and conditioner set includes two 16 ounce bottles funnel 10 seals and one free 32 ounce cruise flask wow so this one's called smart organics professional hair care herbs and vitamins shampoo doesn't look quite as real i don't know that looks that looks really real to me you could find at costco

i feel like um it says herbs and vitamins shampoo and herbs and vitamins conditioner uh 16 fluid ounces so uh this is a one-star view and and not all of these i did i did succeed at the challenge but this first one is a little different. Okay. One star by Amazon customer verified purchase. The title is, I was sad to see it used on a YouTube video where a man decided not to use it. Excuse me? I was sad to see it on a video where the person didn't use it.

Yeah, on a YouTube. So it was like a negative. I assume so. Maybe they were like, oh, I would never use this. That's what I'm assuming. What a very niche YouTube channel. i bet it's a cruise one it's probably not even niche exactly it's probably like okay we should get in on that on the ground floor i don't think it's the ground floor anymore on 33rd floor yes wherever it is okay here's the review itself it was on youtube so now the cruise people will know when it comes through. End of review.

So this person clearly thinks... That's good. They're mad that it's getting exposure. It's on YouTube. So now... It's blowing up. It's been blown wide open, this whole case. And now the cruise people will know.

People are so funny. Oh my God. And this is a another review three stars by ace title is didn't work for us verified purchase unfortunately did not work for carnival cruise frown face alcohol got confiscated they knew right away when they saw the bottles i recommend going with a different brand as this one is now detectable by Carnival Cruise Lines. At least it is out of Long Beach, California. 44 people found this helpful. So they are getting... That's really got to be hit or miss.

I mean, you might just get that one security person who either doesn't care or has no idea. Yeah. Man, you just got to get lucky, I bet. I bet you do. And also, I think the big problem and like one problem. So when I famously drank Hennessy out of a sunscreen bottle. Famously. They talked about the people who did it talked about this isn't the first time they've done something like that.

But it's been confiscated before because when you like shake the bottle it's it's clearly liquid in there and not sunscreen um so one thing i read was to fill it all yeah you gotta do it right and i think they did it right because if you fill it all the way and you shake it there's no air bubble exactly yeah so it it doesn't feel as liquidy yeah okay this one is of that other thing i read to you earlier okay of the other conditioner and shampoo title is was detected immediately one star review by adam verified purchase i bought these for a cruise and it was immediately detected in the metal detectors and confiscated lost 40 worth of whiskey and had an embarrassing experience i followed the instructions exactly i think

technology has caught up with this product and scans can now detect alcohol do not use these for cruise ships and i don't think that's how it works. It's not the metal detector didn't detect alcohol. The metal detector is like, alcohol, alcohol. Like, no. Beep, beep, red flag. No, I don't think that's what it was. Oh, my God. I really don't. I meant to look up a gun flask because I thought maybe that's something, but I didn't.

I'm just so sad to think that it's probably easier to get a gun into some places than it is to get alcohol. They're like, oh, is this alcohol? No, it's probably easier to get a gun into some places than it is to get they're like oh oh is this is this alcohol no it's just a gun oh my mistake sir please come on through my metal detector thought it was detecting alcohol but it's just a giant steel gun is that what is that what guns are made of you know i don't know this could be a really fun crossover because i i just ended up on i'm not get past that yet i just ended up on etsy pistol flasks it's pistol flasks okay you know that's so wild on etsy you can literally like i said you can buy anything oh i found a flask here that says gun control means using both hands

anyway so here's a review this is my last one and this is of binoculars oh yes that's a good one i i knew about that one i think because everybody okay people who's carrying around fake looking binoculars it's the same people going on cruises when we went to that bengals game there's a an old guy in front of us with binoculars he was a real jerk he what was his deal wasn't he behind us oh wait behind us yes that guy the the rude guy he kept telling us to sit down we were like and we were not front row so no there was no i wasn't gonna see anything and we are very much not those kinds of people who are going to be the first to stand up because we don't want to bother people we're afraid of uh confrontation so we stood up when

we couldn't see it unless we stood up next level anyway sorry that used to bring binoculars to football games oh my god shit yep those were filled with alcohol you were not following me with my you just kept saying yep and i was like i'm saying he was drinking yeah our dad doesn't drink alcohol so oh it was filled with iced tea i see that would see that would make with extra that would have made me laugh christina with extra lemon yeah one one of the eye holes had lemons had lemons in it and the other had iced tea this is a three-star review by sebastian and the title is music festival security are getting smarter uh-oh verified purchase so it's a great idea and it worked when I went to a music festival two years ago,

but this year, the security knew exactly how to open it and confiscated it immediately. Just beware. Musical festival security are getting smarter. I would also maybe invest in a leather or at least more legit-looking strap and carry it around your neck when walking in so it looks real, and fill it all the way up so there are no air bubbles end of review can you imagine and somebody else said like i can't even put this on my neck to make it look real so i don't know what's up with this binocular but apparently it looks real fucking fake uh i'm that is not

surprising at all no like something that you can have a generic version of like say sunscreen or shampoo that all have a similar design like right but i feel like i don't know unless you're hollowing out an actual pair of binoculars yeah it's like probably obvious that's what that's what adam says they're getting smarter smarter every day. That's so sad. So sad. It's honestly frightening. Getting so smart to the point where they can tell that you put a bunch of alcohol in your binoculars. Because it's sloshing around your neck. Yeah.

I like this one. It's an umbrella. But like most places don't let you bring an umbrella anyway. At least festivals and stuff. Yeah, I guess. I don't know. Yeah. So, all right. That's all I got. that was great you completed that that's funny i had no idea i would never have well i did guess

it eventually but without enough prodding me neither i i am very surprised by the cruise facts yeah it's a big deal it makes now that i know it does make a lot of sense apparently one of the classics is to uh mouthwash pour your alcohol in it and dye it green wow that's like a very and apparently they get confiscated all the time wow i mean that makes sense though because that's the one of the few things you can bring in that's sloshy like sloshy yes that's liquid right exactly wow great well we have a couple bonuses to record now that's right so we're recording our uh between you and us and our patreon bonus uh which is saint patrick's day you better be excited patrons i have some things to bring to the table so uh patreon.com slash beach to sandy if you'd like to listen to that

um we also might have some merch coming out soon so look out for that we'll of course announce it um and then our live shows y'all have been so great i'm so excited people are buying our tickets uh in june june 8th and 9th cincinnati and columbus ohio beach to sandy.com slash tour to get tickets uh better act fast because they might sell out hopefully question mark let's hope if they do then we might come to a city near you or a port or a port oh man we gotta we gotta get on that giant cruise ship there's one like the largest in the world i have no interest it has like literally like a they call it central park and it's just a giant park zero percent interest in that just i'm gonna send you a tiktok only one she for

sybil sybling will be there sybling a sybling a signing out i'm still unsure so i'll wave to you bye everyone I'm still on shore, so I'll wave to you from here. Bye, everyone.