Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet - 289: Reviews of Pride Parades

Episode Date: June 12, 2024

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Because the Skip app saves you so much time by delivering stuff like your favorite cool treats, groceries, and bevies, you get more time to have the best summer ever. Like riding roller coasters, AHHHHH! learning to water ski, AHHHHH! applying sunscreen to your dad's back. AHHHHH!

Yup, definitely the best summer ever. Squeeze more summer out of summer with Skip. Welcome to Beach to Sandy Tickets at Cirque du Soleil.com. Echo thanks its presenting partner Sunlife. The world is yours to create. Welcome to Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet. A podcast featuring real reviews written by people who just need the world to know what they think. Between you and me, I wanted to like this podcast, but I'd give it zero stars if I could. Hello, little sand monsters. We are here to read reviews to you today of Pride Parades.

Yeah. Pride, Pride. Yeah. We've done some Pride stuff before. I mean, happy Pride, by the way. We've done Pride stuff, but this felt a little different. So. Yeah.

We just narrowed it down to Parades specifically. I think we've done Pride merchandise in the past, which was questionable, but I thought Pride parades, what a fun little twist. I will also say, speaking of which, speaking of something completely irrelevant, I also wanted to throw out there that we are selling tickets to our live show right now.

I know you might've heard a promo earlier, but we already sold out a couple shows and we would love to get the rest move in. So if you go to beachy sandy.com, you can see all the 12 cities we're going to this summer and we would love to see you live as we read one star reviews of your town. And I just want to pitch that one more time, just in case people weren't aware because we're very excited. We are very excited.

Listeners, what you just experienced is something known as rainbow capitalism. We used our Pride episode to sell you tickets to our show. I'd say, speaking of Pride, you should come buy tickets to our show. We're very proud to be coming to your city. We're super proud of our show in Columbus, Ohio. Yes. What a perfect segue, Christine. Hey, we are going to the gayest state, which is Oregon. That was already sold out. So sorry. You missed your chance folks.

The real, the real, the real pride, prideful folks have already bought their tickets for that. So, you know what? The rest of you better step it up is all I'm going to say. Can I start just because, uh, speaking of rainbow capitalism, uh, the first one I have is of LA pride and they're, uh, they're Yelp page. Like the business page says LA pride festival and parade trademark. Oh no, I was going to say sponsored by Chevrolet.

Okay. Well, so it kind of does go in this vein of like, Oh, they're just money hungry. You know? Um, so I just thought I'd read this. I left the trademark symbol in there just, you know, it seems like that's important. Sorry, what's the trademark LA Pride Parade? LA Pride Festival and Parade. TM.

TM. TM. TM. TM. I feel like, what are why, like, what's the point? I don't know, but it seems to be rather important to them. So I just left it. And I do have a one star review by Sarah.

Absolutely so disappointed. What has pride led to? Fraud. They are charging a $3 fee per ticket at LA Pride. I asked, what is it for? Young person at counter said, I don't know why. I am not talking about the typical online charge, just what the girl said, charge just cause.

I could afford my ticket. In fact, I am happy to make over a six figure salary and my household income is more than double that. But what about those that cannot afford it? However, that's not what I'm upset about. I'm mad about the fraud and sneakiness of it all. What is going on with this tactics? I kept asking all of the customer service reps what was the service fee about and they said they

didn't know. A fee just because they wanted more money? I have been coming to these events for many years and they have never had a fee at the entrance on top of the ticket price. When does this stop? Pride started for a very specific purpose. Now the president of the organization wants to make it into his own financial benefit, end of review. Oh dear. Now the organization is called CSW, Christopher Street West. They just put the, put the event on. So a lot of people were referencing the president and I didn't understand,

but I guess the president of this organization is the one that's getting a lot of this flak. But yeah, I just, you know, I thought like, oh. So it is Joe Biden. Are you just ignoring that? It's Joe Biden. You didn't question it, so, or didn't deny it? He knew pride would lead the rainbow road to fraud is where we're all headed. That's a great book title, The Rainbow Road to Fraud.

That feels like a self-published Amazon book waiting to happen. Yeah, I guess I just like the part about what about the people who cannot afford it? Just kidding. I don't care about that. Like immediate, like anyway, that's not what I mean. Look, I've got so much money. Wait, let me tell you again. I actually have twice as much money as you're thinking right now.

Yeah, yeah. You know how much money you thought I had? Double it. But these money hungry assholes want $3. Forget it. Oh man. I will say, I feel like that seems silly to charge for a pride parade. Okay. So I did actually do a little bit. So people were obviously already pissed that there was a charge at all, which is understandable for something like this. I imagine it gets dicey. But I guess one of the issues, speaking of the president of fucking CSW, whatever that is, is it Christopher? Is that his name? I don't know. Maybe it's someone else who's the president, but I guess they originally tried to up the price to $35. Everyone kind of freaked out. So instead they charged their original $30, like they kept it, but then they

added a $3 fee that nobody could figure out. So it was sort of like, wait a minute. So everyone brought $30, like expecting to pay that entrance. And then it ended up being $33. So, you know, I'm not, I'm not casting a Spurgeon's here, Chris, Mr. Christopher, but, uh, I just am saying what I read on Yelp. Got it. Which is actually a great place to get information.

Good resource. Great, it's primary source, if you ask me. Just check my bibliography. My first review is a three-star review. I'd say it's negative though. This is of Chicago Pride, okay? Here we go. Had fun until I got ticket open alcoho.

End of review. Yeah. Well, it seems like somebody needed to check in on you, bud. So I guess they had like a ticket. They got a ticket or a open container laws. laws they spelled alcohol a L C H a O L oh wow that's okay it's worse than i expected yeah i thought maybe they just forgot the H but wow they really butchered that one yeah it was a little butchered uh so yeah i think the alcohol was doing the trick but uh and i'm glad they had fun until that point what's the trick But I'm glad they had fun until that point. What's the trick was as in they were like.

I don't know. They learned how to not spell. I see it did the trick. It got them arrested and just to take it lower. So far a little bit. OK, well, that's not terrible. There's worse things you've gotten. Lowered my IQ quite a bit.

You've lowered your IQ with alcohol to right? I had to get it tested twice a month. It's really important to me that I have a very high IQ. Yeah, they test your vitamin D and your IQ at the same time. Yes, yes. Those two somehow seem linked, actually. I was gonna say, I think they're usually right around the same level, too.

I'm in tons of studies about it, too. Yeah. I think it was like negative two last time because you were like dropped your vitamin D. Yeah, my vitamin D I've forgotten to take it and then I forgot everything else you forgot. Yeah, just forgot You just forgot. So this is a two twofer Well, actually it might be a fourfer. So we'll see four. Four-fur? Yeah, well, we'll see how you feel. I don't even know what a two-fur is, let alone a four-fur.

I don't. I don't know what you're talking about. To be clear, I don't think it's really anything. I think I just made it up. So don't worry. But it's a two-star review followed by an updated review. That's a one-star. So it's two separate reviews by the same reviewer.

This is of the LA Pride Festival and Parade trademark. And the first one is from June 12th, 2009. And it's a two star review. So I'll read that one first and I'll read the update. This is by Peter. Yes, it's this weekend. P-U. I've been five times back in the eights. I was in my 20s still.

Pukarama. So glad I was drunk to forget. The only good thing about the event, Chelsea Handler from Chelsea Lately, why the second star is here, is the grand marshal of the parade. After that, just the usual we-ho clone looking ecstasy in my day, it was MMDA popping bunch. I don't think that's true. I know. I don't think it was.

That's no, he forgot. Remember the apple made him forget. You have perfect experience with this. True. P.U. Pukarama. After that, just the usual we-ho clone looking ecstasy. In my day, MMDA. Popping bunch of twinks along with all of the ridiculous overt displays of demonstrating masculinity crowd from Faultline and the Eagle. Oh yes, and those sooo yesterday sisters of perpetual

indulgence. I would rather attend a stonewall celebration. Now that was an event that deserved the parades. An event that has a sense of purpose and accomplishment. Need more opinion? Read my Long Beach Pride review. This blade finds this all none too appealing as I do all of these events. End of first review. Oh no, I forgot. This was a four. Yeah. So the update, remember what the second star was for by the way, and the Chelsea Handler. Correct. Okay. So this is a one star. No Chelsea. Chelsea. Did you, was it a no show? Uh oh. No. So I don't know why. Well, okay.

This is a one star view and it's two days later, June 14th, 2009. It's over. Thank God for another year. It's over. I saw Chelsea Handler, Grand Marshall on the news, only bright spot of this thing. What an embarrassed ass meant. She didn't look as thrilled to be there as she did a few nights ago on her show talking about it. Let's watch Monday and see. End of review. Oh, are we getting a review after Monday's show? So there was not another update, but I did go find the Long Beach review that he said, you want some information. And I said, I really, really hate to admit this, but I do.

Like, I really wish I didn't want more information or more it says need more opinion. And like, I don't, but I do also. I couldn't help myself. And I just felt like I had to bring this. So do you mind if I also read the Long Beach review? I think people listening are like, of course you're gonna read it.

Like what, as if I'm gonna say no, and then you're just not gonna read it. Obviously I'm gonna read it, but I have to pretend I have some, like a small amount of courtesy still left. Trying to pretend like I have some like agency here. Exactly, offer you a crumb to make you feel like you're. Yeah, it's not even a false agency.

No, just a crumb of it. So this is a review of the Long Beach Lesbian and Gay Pride Parade, and this is a two-star view. And this was written the same year, 2009. And this is a two-star view, and there is an update after this as well. I have and always will avoid the festival parade and the bars during Pride weekend.

However, for the last four years I was working in the bars, so hard to say avoid on that one. Even in my 20s I've never enjoyed these events of which I've attended under protest six times. It's like camping, no pun intended. You either like it or you don't, and I don't. I don't even own a rainbow anything. Wait, maybe the photo of a rainbow from when I went to Cancun counts. Do you think he looked around his house like, oh shit, there is a rainbow in here. A framed photo of a rainbow.

Just like a Polaroid from Cancun. When I finally became honest with myself on that note, it was so easy to say, no, I didn't go because I would rather gargle with glass and then look at the bottom of my shoe and then look up and then look up back at the pissy bitches. Sorry, I just can't. I don't know. I don't know. Gargled glass. I feel like that's a new one. Gargle glass is good. I have to admit that's pretty damn good. I have not heard that one either. And I thought that was, that was evocative

as I like to say. Happy pride. Well, I only say Merry Christmas, happy birthday. And that is it. The parade is the only time I see the mayor. And first of all, sorry, that just got me. The parade is the only time I see the mayor. Okay. The parade is the only time I see the mayor. Okay.

The parade is the only... Hi Juniper. The parade is the only time I see the mayor and elected officials actually doing anything. To each his own, live and let live. We all have our enjoyment levels and I'm glad I'm not alone in my opinion. And that fellow Yelpers is this exactly my opinion,

just not this Long Beach Blade scene. End of review. JAY Who is forcing this person to go to pride? Just stop. STACEY They said under protest. I mean, that's so dramatic. And like, this person lives here in Long Beach, or at least in the area, so I feel like the amount that they seem to be involved, it's like they don't wanna admit how engrossed they are in this scene. Like they know all, they watch Chelsea Handler

on the news talk about it. They're all excited about it. I mean, it might be like their normal hot kind of thing. And then that one time a year they're like, pride comes through. Yeah, they have to like go into hiding. I can't go to my normal places or whatever. I can't do my normal thing.

That's a fair point. I imagine especially like like have you gone to WeHo Pride in LA? I've never been to a pride parade in my life. Really? I've never, the last, and this is, it's not a pride specific thing. It's about time you get canceled for something.

The last parade, this is gonna make it worse. I think the last parade I went to was a July 4th parade with you and dad and Nelsie, like when we were little. In like, and I rode in the car, a car. And I was like, oh my God, I get to ride in a car. I rode in a car. Like there was some classic car that was going and I got to sit in the back seat. I don't think I've been to someone might correct me, but I doubt it.

I parades. Uh-uh. Have you did you see what happened to JFK in that one parade? They're scary. Oh, God, let me tell you. I'll tell you after. Look it up y'all if you don't know about this. But yeah, no parade. A lot of people already negative outside another negative negative outside another negative. Bad. Summer time, hot, hot, warm weather, another negative. And you stand there. Standing the whole time. You stand there.

Vying for a spot anywhere. Okay. Here's my thought. Anywhere where you have to go early to get a good spot. I don't want to be there. Oh my God. So true. I'd rather just show up somewhere and I already have my spot set. Ideally with the chair. I don't want to go there. Oh my God, so true. And I'd rather just show up somewhere and I already have my spot set. Ideally with the chair. I don't want to go hours or ideally to sit. I love when a movie theater is like

specific seating now. Like I feel like a lot of them are now are like specific seats. Cause then I go and I sit in that seat. And that's why when you said that people are paying $33 or whatever for this pride parade, I'm like, uh-uh, I'm not paying to stand around. Some people bought it and then they were like,

heard it into like a three hour line that went straight to the exit. It was overfilled. It's actually hilarious. Which is like the most absurd thing I've ever heard. We were live for three hours and then we finally reached the end and it was the exit. Look, I will say I get like making it limited space because fuck like,

especially like we hoe, I assume is like one of the, I don't know. I just, whatever you said happened to JFK, like I'm sure they don't want a repeat. True, true. That could be an issue. Um, but I think that's the only reason places in Texas don't do pride parades. If they don't, that's probably the only reason. Um, but no, they're itching to do them. You know, they no, they really are. But no, I think of, no, I know of any parade, there are two types of parades

that I would willingly go to. It is a pride parade of people. Someone ever asked me to join them or something, or if it was convenient, or if I'm like, okay. Or if it was convenient and, or if it was convenient or if I'm like okay or if it was convenient and or if it was the other side of me is that the straight side of me says which is most of it all of it I'm sorry what am I saying the straight part I accidentally said that wrong and then was like uh-huh let me try to walk this back and I then I think I kept walking forwards

instead of walking backwards by accident. All of me is straight, okay guys? Don't worry everybody. No homo, okay? No. Jesus Christ, I don't know what's wrong with me. What's the other grade you'd attend? If the Bengals win the Super Bowl

or the Reds win the World Series. That would be fun. Like a sports related, my team winning. So basically sports or the Reds win the World Series. That would be fun. Like a sports related my team winning. So basically sports are gay. Sports are gay. Sports or gay. Yeah. I love that.

I mean, what about like Welcome to the Black Parade or like May Day Parade? There's a few parades that are pretty emo. Okay, that's true. No, I'm okay. I went to one emo night and I wouldn't say it was fun, but I was like, I don't know any of these songs. I feel like I'm not actually in that, you know, scene. It was I get that.

I feel like I always am like not as not as up on my Emo as I as I think I am. Yeah. Anyway, like Sunny Day Real Estate the whole time for me. That's that would have been great. What the hell is that? What are you trying to like plug how how like deep cut your Emo? OK, totally. This I mean, I just, is it my turn or yet? Or are you still reading this? This is the up bullshit. Yeah, this is the update. It's two stars, two stars.

And this is from a year later now of the Long Beach parade. And it's actually a quote went up from one to two stars. No, it went from two to two. Went from two to two. Okay. The other one went from two to one. And this one went to, got it, got it. Cause Chelsea Handler didn't look very happy. So, here is a two-star view from 2010 of the Long Beach Lesbian and Gay Pride Parade. And it's a quote, by the way. I've lived long enough to have many regrets. Most of them involve words, usually harsh criticisms, that despite my good intention never helped anyone Chelsea or L. Oh

Himself oh Yeah, I don't know and there's also a YouTube link right below it but I don't I clicked in it Defunct. Oh dead link. Okay. Yeah, so I don't, I clicked in, it's defunct. Oh, dead link. Okay. Yeah. So I don't know what it is. I'm both relieved and disappointed at the same time, weirdly. Yeah. I like, I like braced myself and then kind of was relieved when nothing happened, but then was like, oh, but I am a little curious, you know? So that's that. And Alex, no, please don't be mad. There's one more thing I want to say.

So it's a five for., please don't be mad. There's one more thing I want to say. So it's a five for maybe a five or six for six or six for. Okay. Okay. What happened is then of course I was on his profile because this came up right after it and it was so dramatic that I couldn't figure it out. And this is where things go really off the rails, okay? And I feel like we learn a lot about this guy, Peter L. who quotes himself in his Yelp reviews. Here's a one-star view. Now, I'd see, this is again, I'm so confused.

This is, I don't understand what this is a review of. What I can sort of sense is that somebody had his Long Beach Pride Parade review removed. Oh. Okay, so I know that that happened because he quoted it, quoted an email from Yelp saying, you've broken the content guidelines and it's not relevant to consumer experience

and they deleted his review. I have a bit of a point there. I don't know what the fuck, how it was relevant. His quote about himself. And then he wrote about it on a page called the Meanie Mafia on Yelp. But I don't know, like it's not anything that I could click on. But I don't know, like it's not anything that I could click on. Like that's the- Fuck. I know and I clicked on it and it says it doesn't exist. So I don't know if this is like a complaints page on Yelp where you can like vent or something.

But here is the review. I think this is the one that got removed originally. Okay. One star. one that got removed originally. Okay. One star. As I begin to grasp what this review is all about, triggers from my bullied past, grades one through 12, yeah, throwing rocks at me during graduation rehearsal, are resurfacing.

Why? I was too good looking. Too sensitive. Jeez. Jesus. Oh, that's not what I expected to hear. I was like, oh, and I was like, oh, wait. Oh my God. Yesterday I was at the library with Leona

and this little girl walks up and she goes, I'm the nicest girl at my school. And I was like, oh, good for you. That's great. And she goes, actually, I think I would be perfect for any school. And I was like, okay. Confident and nice.

Oh my God. I love that. And then she proceeded to tell Leona she was making their fake cookies all wrong. So I was like, well, okay. Oh, and a good cook. Maybe work on that. A good baker.

Okay, look, this is sorry that Leona had to deal with a triple threat. I guess so. Leona was put in her place, rightfully so. Okay, let's get back to this. Why? I was too good looking, too sensitive, too caring, kind, I dressed well, I was articulate, I was well spoken, and I like both boys and girls for two different reasons, Bohemian and cosmopolitan. I imagine an eighth grader like talking like this. I love it. I imagine an 8th grader talking like this. This gets me. I love it.

I'm sad that someone threw rocks at this 8th grader. Well he has something to say. Well step back you bitches. Because I have watched enough Dynasty, the Colby's, I've knocked out five abusive boyfriends in my lifetime, put gang members in the hospital, even slapped a few catty gay queens makeup off their faces, and Jersey Shore douchebags that if they had grandchildren they would stutter! Also can muster back up all my gang cred from 1971-74 from the south side Gardendale-Kaye

Flacco, gents take out my beer can curlers, use my razor blades to stick them in your mouth and punch in dew to your face so you won't talk smack for months too. So go back to the belly of a washed up on the beach Jaws victim and stay off Yelp. So be gone. You have no power here before somebody drops a house on you. And then another YouTube link that is also defunct. Oh no. Yeah. Um, I'm gonna say what I always say and I don't think I've been wrong about this.

They have a way with words. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. We, that was too much. Yeah. And so I'm not the update basically to that was just like, who got my review flagged and why, and, um, just shouted a lot.

So you can imagine, I mean, I'm going to just leave it as a five for not a six for, cause I think you can use your Imagination to fill in the blanks. Oh darn. Yeah, but so that was my big my big rant for the day. Oh, okay Well, thanks for listening everyone. We'll talk to you next time. I know that would be nice to be like, okay part two Wait that sounds like a great plan we should do less work Why have we never thought about that before? Oh, I have. Here, why do you think I only bring five reviews every single time?

Okay. It's not because of less work. It's like, Oh, I get it. Yeah, no, I feel like it makes sense to be consistent. I don't know. It makes sense in my brain to do it that way. That's why I bring 16 and some of them are five long So yeah, exactly. That's just how it goes

Here's that. Oh, here's my This is my second review of the day. I was like am I there's no way I'm only on this second one Oopsie here is my the review of the Kansas City Pride Fest This is a two-star review Two stars because the drag queens were the only redeeming quality of this entire festival. Not enough food trucks or drink tents. The lines were insane. It's like a straight white man put this event together.

Vanilla. End of review. Christopher West, was this you, Mr. President? Now that is, uh, ooh, that cuts. That's gotta be the worst insult. A straight white man put this together. Look, I would know if you put me in charge of putting a pride, ooh, that cuts. That's gotta be the worst insult. A straight white man put this together. I would know if you put me in charge of putting a pride, look, I would do my best.

It would be shitty as fuck. It would just be sports, I think, everywhere. It would be the Cincinnati Reds would just be walking down the street celebrating their fake World Series win. Yeah, no. That's rough. That review, I was like, yeah, I can picture it even.

I can picture it. I don't know. It's not good. It's really nothing. I mean, not to be the most boring, least interesting person ever, but it's nothing I hate more than a line. A line?

Yeah. Like a queue. Like a long line. Like a queue. Oh. Yeah. I don't ever want to stand in a line again. Good.

Okay, that's a good way to live your life. I don't know if it's possible. Like to not want one. It's not, probably. That's why, you know, never mind. Just send Blaze into the line. That's what I do. I just send D.

Send someone else in? Yeah. Go stand in that line for me. It's fine. Except, no, no, sorry. D stands into the line. That's what I do. I just sent D. Send someone else in. Yeah. Go stand on that line for me. Except no, no, sorry. D stands on the line. Oh, that's what they say over there. Weird, man. Well, actually, I get it wrong. I don't there's like, like you're standing online. But like, there's a way you say it where you're like, you still say in line, like I'm either I'm in line. But you would say you're standing online.

There's some peculiar things out here that I'm still learning about. I'm trying. I think you're in the line, but you're online. Yeah, that's probably it. That sounds right. But I don't know. I just say the normal way. Yeah, the normal way. Yeah. Yeah. This is from Stephanie. and it is a review sort of. It's from Reddit, which now I did not know about this subreddit. It's called rdogfree. Do you know about this? I assume it's like rchildfree, like the idea of like, but with dogs, with

dogs, people, anti dogs in public spaces. So I knew all about childfree, right? Like I know about that community, but I do not know about Dogfree. I've never heard of it. No idea that this was such a hot topic, but I guess somebody wrote a review called Dogs at Pride, a review of sorts, and they posted this to the dog free subreddit. And I just like I took a little gander at the dog free homepage and there were a quite a few just I mean very aggressive comments about people having dogs. So you know just kind of what you would expect. So just to give you an idea and this is a review that somebody posted here. So here we go.

Went to a pride parade today. I know it's May, but who cares? Was looking out for dogs and how they behaved. So I'll share the experience. Firstly, the number of dogs was as expected. I was one person, so I couldn't have seen all the dogs, but I saw about four. Okay. By the way, for somebody who's like clearly dog free, they think about

dogs seemingly a lot more than I do. I will say, yeah, that's where it kind of, it kind of tends to go that way, I think with these communities where it becomes like that becomes your obsession and you cannot stop looking out for- Yes, it's almost like you're more strongly opinionated about it because you're like, yes, exactly. And because, I mean, I will say I have lots of issues with like people, not the dogs themselves, I will say the dog owners in public areas, like when not on leashes and bringing them

into inappropriate places and... Well, maybe you should join this group because you sound like one of these... Hey, I bet that if you sprinkle a little nuance, there are some good points in there. Oh boy. I think so. All right, let me finish this review first before you make any like grand statements. Sprinkle a little nuance. There are some good points in there. Oh boy. I think so. All right, let me finish this review first before you make any grand standing over there. You know what I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna make you the grand marshal of the dog free parade. This is gonna be me and a bunch of cats walking down the street. We're gonna have the best time. I fucking love cats. No dogs allowed. It'll just be cats. Oh, that'd be fun. Now you're like, you were joking at first. Now you're like on board.

Now I actually really love it. And guess what I'm going to do? I'm going to bring my dog. Even Gio. No, he's going to be so scared of all the cats. So he'll be fine. He would probably try. He would probably get eaten.

So they're looking out for dogs, so they're going to pride and actively seeking out dogs. All they can think of are the four dogs that are in the area. Which is like, well, my child does, but for other reasons, like, because she's a toddler, so it's just very odd. Anyway, firstly, the number of dogs was as expected. I was one person, so I couldn't have seen all of them, but I saw about four. Not bad! Should have been zero, with the exception of service dogs, of course, as the event was very not dog-friendly, with loud music, confetti, and all that, but I guess I'll take it. Second, behavior of dogs, mostly with no incidents. One notable was when one of them saw another,

barked a bit, but they calmed down pretty fast. Also notable was that, as said before, the event was not dog-friendly, and the dogs clearly felt it. Some looked a bit scared. And finally, the owners. Not all that great. While not anything horrifying, but they still kept their dogs at way too loose leashes. Nothing of note, but the issues stayed persistent. Overall, the event wasn't ruined by dogs, They were simply mildly annoying. Nothing more, nothing less. As an entire event, a good eight out of 10 had tons of fun. But in the dogs perspective, five out of 10, I've seen worse but could have been better. Always. End of review.

So like, they will not rest until the world is eradicated speaking for dogs. No, like, but like the way they were talking, they're like these poor like it seemed like they felt bad for these dogs. No, like, but like the way they were talking, they're like these poor, like, it seemed like they felt bad for these dogs more than anything. I agree. But then I think it sort of skews more into the territory of like, why do these humans, I mean, which I don't think they particularly care for dogs. But you're right that like, also if the dogs are not enjoying it, yes, I agree with that.

That probably should not be at the loud music and fireworks, et cetera. But yeah, if you read the comments and stuff, everyone's like, yeah, these people think they can just bring their dog, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So I'll see you at the cat parade. Yeah, I can't wait. Yeah, no, it is always silly

because they like explained every, they made made a whole post explain all this stuff to say nothing happened. To say it was no more no less. Yeah, then average. I get it if you're like, oh, like, I'm so frustrated. I, I want to A pride parade, which like it's not even like giving anyone any insight into like an area or like a place to avoid. Yeah, I just thought that was odd. Like how, how very focused on dogs they are. Despite like. Yeah, it's like they came full circle. And everyone else was like,

oh, I guess there were dogs there. Like, you know, everyone's like. You know, right. Like I wouldn't think about it. Yeah. Yeah.. Yeah, so anyway, that's my new foray into Reddit this week. I already regret it. Well, I have a foray into Facebook from Stephanie. God, that's so much worse. I take it back, I take it back. This is a post about the Utah Pride Festival from 2017. post about the Utah Pride Festival? From 2017. Our family, four teens, eight-year-old, and myself, had a wonderful time in the parade. The people directing traffic at the end of the parade separated our group, though, so

my eight-year-old riding in the truck was sent down a different street than the walkers of the group. This meant I got to spend the next 45 minutes, along with three other parents of young children, trying to call and track down our children. The streets were still all blocked, so not possible for the truck to swing back around, and then trying to coordinate a place to meet where we could easily meet. All while also trying to help young kids not be freaked out that they were in total chaos and not with their parents. And if you were wondering, the police and the Pride organizers were zero help in helping to figure out what direction the truck was sent in or how we could track it down. One cop's exact quote, good luck with that, so what was a really amazing experience? Super thankful for the free water, was overshadowed

by terror for close to an hour. This could have been so easily avoided by simply not separating groups. We love pride, been going for years. We'll most likely go again, but we'll unfortunately not be letting my youngest participate again. And the review. That poor thing. Oh my God. It's so scary.

Oh my God. I'd be freaked the fuck out if that 4th of July card just like took off. I'd be like, where the fuck are you taking me? Mommy! Yeah. I just, I sort of be like, where the fuck are you taking me? Mommy. Yeah, I just, I sort of feel like this is the most level-headed reviewer I've ever heard. Who's like, you know what?

I was so thankful for the free water, but I did lose my child for a full hour. And I watched a lot of SVU and a lot of terrible thoughts were going through my head and the police didn't. And the police was as helpful as always. Not Mariska. I just, the fact that they're like, oh, well anyway, could be better,

but I guess we won't bring our child next time so that he doesn't get abducted in the streets. I mean, wow. That's alarming. I don't- Good luck with that. Good luck with that. So stupid. I mean, has anyone seen SVU?

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The ScoreBet app here with trusted stats and real-time sports news. Yeah, hey, who should I take in the Boston game? Well, statistically speaking. Nah, no more statistically speaking. I want hot takes. I want knee-jerk reactions. That's not really what I do.

Is that because you don't have any knees or? Ah. The ScoreBet, trusted sports content content seamless sports betting download today. 19 plus Ontario only. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or the gambling of someone close to you, please go to Connix Ontario.ca. Here is a redemption. This is from Stephanie and it's a Buzzfeed article about people's first pride parade experiences. So this is a kind of a random, I'm just going to say it's positive, a redemption. And this is from that Buzzfeed listicle. My friends and I spent the day before tie-dyeing white clothes since we couldn't afford or even find Pride clothing. We were using food coloring

dyes and I read online that if you mixed it with vinegar, the color would be more vibrant. However, the next day we realized they hadn't dried, and they still smelled heavily of vinegar. But we didn't have anything else to wear. So we wore those vinegar food coloring dyed clothes in the parade. At the end of the day, we were like, oh hey, this doesn't really smell like vinegar anymore. Turns out, it had all just seeped into our skin. So our clothes were fine, but our bodies smelled like pickles. End of review. So, you know, Xenar, you're missing out.

I love pickles. We need your review of your first Pride parade. Now I'm curious. Yeah. Something exciting might happen. You might get on a truck and get diverted into your totally different lane and I'll have to come find you through terror. Maybe there's someone somewhere on our tour where there's a pride parade nearby.

Like, you know, like I don't know this June is so busy. I'm like, I feel like I fear that I won't be able to find a time to see a pride parade, but also I just, the idea of going to a parade sounds terrible. I'm going to a cricket match this weekend that's completely unrelated. Wow. But gonna see some cricket. Why? I mean where? Well on Long Island not in Long Island. On Long Island. So are you gonna stand it online in online in Long Island in a long line?

Online. In a long line on Long Island. In a long line. I'm standing online. In a long line. In a long line on Long Island. Yeah, that's what I said. Yeah, yeah, I needed to go through it myself,

just to make sure that was right. Yeah, I need to go to a Pride parade. I know I want to kind of. I just don't want to go to a parade. You know, I want to go to a Pride parade. I love. Why don't we just go to a Pride festival? Yeah, I don't really know what that is.

I've never heard that as a thing. I've seen it through these reviews, but I've only known of like Pride parades, not of the festivals. I mean, usually the festival has a parade as part of it yeah and then there's like a block party type thing. I also don't go to festivals anymore though so maybe like music festivals at least. I'll I want to I want to. Just trust that we'll figure it out. When it's meant to happen it'll happen. True true it's just hard to get out of my

When it's meant to happen, it'll happen. True, true. It's just hard to get out of my place, my area, my bubble. Maybe we'll just, maybe I'll just book us a hotel right in the midst of a pride parade. That would be easy. We can just walk outside and experience it or just look out our window. We don't even have to walk outside.

Hell yeah, I'm in. Just open a window. That's my dream. Okay, my next one was sent in by Kristen. This is a very special one and it begins with a musical number. Oh, okay. So just quick clarification for everyone. I'm assuming Zandy didn't want that part in but Zandy did just ask our editor to not put music under whatever he's about to sing. Yeah. So like- Because we can't afford the rights to this actual song. Understood. Or the karaoke version probably even. Yeah, probably. So I don like, because we can't afford the rights to this actual song. Understood. Or the karaoke version, probably even. Yeah, probably.

So I don't know what we're about to hear, but it's about to be very uncomfortable for everyone. So I thought I would throw that out. So we're all prepared for the record, especially me. I feel like I need to do some penance here. I have been a mess talking through this episode. So sing for me, Paolo. So here we go. Here is a five star review. This is of Chicago, uh, pride fest.

Um, and this beginning, do you want me to tell you what song it's in the tune of that I don't know if it would help you, but might help other people? I'm sure. It is pride parentheses in the name of love, by U2. Okay. Okay. Wait, like, wait, that's the name of the song. The song is Pride, parentheses in the name of love, and it's by U2. That's a real song.

Oh, I don't know the song. You do know that song. I promise you, you know it. In the name of love. I promise you, you know it. In the name of love. I, okay. I just, I'm gonna trust you on that. Okay, here we go. Oh, oh, oh, I know this one.

I know you do. Here we go. Early morning, April 4th, parentheses, or actually July, gay guys sing out in the Chicago land sky. Equal at last, it took all our lives, but they could not take our pride. Forget how the song goes. In the name of love, parade in the name of love.

That's the end of the musical number. Thank you. I'd listened to the song before and I completely forgot how it went Sounded right to me. I forgot how good that fucking song is like you too, especially with their like social themes like that Okay, that part of the song is about Martin Luther King getting shot So it's kind of a choice to use it But who do you think wrote this review and made that choice to use that part of the song? Oh my God.

I even thought to myself like, wow, this has such Fox vibes. It is a Fox review. It didn't even occur to me that it was. It's a Fox review. And you know what, when you said, oh, and there's social justice song, and I went, wow, that sounds like you're talking about Fox and his social justice music.

Hell yeah. Oh my gosh. Of course he would listen to you two. Of course he parodies you two. That makes so much sense. I used to listen to you two. And I U2 when I was in high school or something. Yeah, because all our iPod Nanos got fucking hacked by Apple. No, I never listened to that album.

But fun fact about the song, so early morning April 4, Martin Luther King was shot in the evening, not in the morning. Wow, that is fun. Bono regrets that line because he messed that up and he's like, I fucked up. But anyway, it's a great song actually. I listened to it again and I was like, dang, this is a great song. Here we go. I'm going to read the rest of the review now. Sorry. Being in Chicago for the Pride Parade was a real experience. It messes with traffic and messes with homophobic people, of which there are plenty,

especially in the rich suburbs of Chicagoland. But I'll tell you what, this is one of the best pride festivals and parades that you'll ever see. Some of the cops were making questionable statements about some of the people marching, which wasn't much fun to listen to. The whole area of town where the march is a very LGBTQ friendly area to begin with, and one of the coolest parts of town. It's a place where I hang out a lot anyway when I'm in Chicago. The third great city of the US makes a real effort, and the buildings downtown are adorned

with the rainbow flags. And even though the already awful traffic of the weekend is made more awful, it's well worth coming in and checking it out for yourself. We loved every second. I didn't like that all the gay clubs around here closed really early or were not even open on the night of the parade. And as I said, some of the cops that were hanging around after the parade was over were making unfortunate remarks and being a little bit stereotypical. Bose is pretty stereotypical too, but in a good way. End of review. Stereotypical too, but in a good way end of review

Sign-off hey Hey stereo, you know what that makes me think? I've got to sing that in the tune of You too song fuck. Oh shit. Yeah Yeah, he's like, huh that reminds me of sharper image I better go write of Sharper Image. Maybe that's how he just gets these thousands of reviews done. Yeah, almost 17,000 now. Holy crap. He's an icon. Icon, icon, icon.

And if this review doesn't prove it, I don't know what does. You know, at this point, if you're not agreeing with us, that Fox is an icon. You're not on the Fox train. Well, we're leaving. We're leaving, leaving without you. Choo-choo. Choo-choo. I hate that for us. OK. train? Well, we're leaving, we're leaving, leaving without you. I hate that for us. Okay. Here is another review. This is sent in by Stephanie. She, they, uh, it's actually from cruise critic.com of course.

And this is a redemption. I have a cool cruiser here who even has a cool little cruise boat icon, like next to their photo and that same tag that says rare. Do you remember that? Yeah I do remember that. And it this one this person has 28,000 comments on here so I don't know if that means like Jesus they're like high echelon tier of posters. I kind of hope so if they're doing that many they better be. I know but it's like rare makes it sound like they're rarely seen. And then I see 28,000 of those. I'm like, they don't seem very rare. I did not take it that way. I see. Yeah, I don't know. I think I just miss, I'm misinterpreting the,

but I will say that their photo is hilarious. It's two older men with like gray hair and beards in white tuxes leaning back to back almost Charlie's angels. I love it. Yeah, and I'm pretty sure that they're a couple because well, let me read you. So Jim, he talks about his experiences and this one is about a pride parade.

So here we go. Sunday, April 7th. We had a lazy morning, sipping coffee and tea, usually staying in an Airbnb. We do a bit of shopping and pick up staples, bread, cheese, milk, mayo, cereal, lunch meats, and wine. We usually have breakfast and lunch and go out for nice dinners. We wanted to explore favorite areas. Let's go back in time, about 38 years. I just came to terms with being and came out. My best friend also paralleled

my life and had just come out. I was in Sydney on business, which coincided with Sydney Gay Pride. I ended dressed as Captain Cook riding on a float in the Gay Pride Parade. So today we are off to explore Oxford Street in Darlington, but I needed lunch first, so I made brie and ham sandwiches. End of post. And then there's a large picture of a brie and ham sandwich. Oh, good. I was like gonna say, only thing I want to see from, no, this is sandwich. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Very, very visual. That feels like the proper meal. I don't know what about it, but. It feels what? Like the proper meal for this kind of.. Yeah, like like a ham and brie It sounds just like standard enough, but just different enough. Yeah, like a slightly elevated Slightly elevated exactly like if you're if you're gonna be going to let me scroll up Oxford Street in Darlington See it just you can't be eating just like a string cheese. No, you gotta add some brie

You can't be eating just like a string cheese. No, you got to add some brie. Gosh string cheese and baloney. Uh-uh. Oh, forget it. That's brie and ham. Look at that white tux he's wearing. You think he's string cheese? Come on.

Let's be real. I mean, if you keep them in your pockets of your white tux, like they won't stain because they're the same color. That is true. I have learned that. Just an idea. Yeah. The hard way.

Well, I guess the easy way. Nevermind. So this is, uh, oh wait, do you have any more? Yeah, I've got like a redemption. It's okay. I don't know. Okay. I only have one left So if you and it's a redemption, so if you want to go I was feeling weirdly emotional when I was doing this And I read this and I was like, it's so positive and I just felt it's not even that it's nice It's a nice review just a nice positive thing afterward just to kind of do a palette-trimzer. Palette-destroyer.

This is just a positive review of the Love Unites Parade and Festival in Reading, in England. And... I don't know. It's just... It's not even... I don't know. I like it. Five stars. Here we go. I have been bringing my children to Reading Pride since they were a few years old. It is a free event with a fantastic atmosphere for all ages. Everyone is friendly, welcoming, and inclusive, and we always have a great time. Many people dress up or wear clothing that they feel most comfortable in, or most like their true selves in. There is no judgement. My kids are now 16, 18, and 20, and they still come with me most years.

There is plenty of entertainment, acts on the main stage, a headline act, a smaller stage area, a circus skill tent, craft, games, sporting area, fairgrounds, stalls selling a variety of items, information stalls, and plenty more. Kind of sounds like a roller coaster tycoon, like menu, you know? I was like trying not to interrupt, but like a circus. Wait, can you tell me the circus act? Oh yeah, you get it. There's a circus skill tent craft game.

I assume people juggling or something in there. I don't know. Like you get to watch like circus performers, I assume. Um, yeah, I know. This doesn't sound great. We usually wander around the two fields then decide what we want for lunch from a huge variety of food stands. This year there was an amazing vegan burger barbecue which I hope is booked again next year. Then we eat lunch near the main stage and stay and watch the acts.

Everyone is happy singing and dancing or just sat chatting. I always buy a wristband and make a donation to help keep the festival free. I would definitely recommend Reading Pride, usually the first Saturday in September. End of review. Aww. And I read this review and I'm like, I want to go to the fucking Reading Pride. Can't we just go that one? That sounds great.

Yeah, and um. It's July 21st. It's July 21st? Oh, they said usually the first Saturday in September. Well, they're liars. So. Okay. So well, they said usually July 21st.

Well, that's after our Cincinnati show. So I'll probably still be in Cincinnati at that point. Shoot. All right. Maybe we just fly together quick for the day. Skip poppin' a jump. Yeah. Over the heading.

Good plan. Good plan. I loved, I clicked on their page and it's like, they're all, I'm trying to find the circus tent, right? But all the photos are like via Flickr. And so it's very, it's not the most user friendly situation. I tried to open it was like Flickr is loading. And I was like, that is still a thing. Okay. I feel like Flickr is loading and I was like that is still a thing. Okay.

Um, I feel like Flickr is still a thing, especially with photographers, because you can like high quality stuff. But like, yeah, I feel like it doesn't make sense to advertise your business with those embedded wise. It's not the most user friendly. But you know, it actually works pretty fine once it loads, but I can't find any pictures of this damn circus tent, which maybe that's Inside or trade secret. I'm not allowed to know about but I know that's probably so true. That's probably it's probably an insider's trade secret Probably I think you're right. I just love that review and I love that you get to sit and I love that You get to wear what you want. No, and like that sounds like my ideal type of day. It sounds great

No, it sounds really nice Did I tell you when I went to the Appalachian Fest for Mother's Day? Blaze took me to Blazon Leona took me to the Appalachian Festival. Where's that? What? Where's that again at Coney Island? Really? Yeah, I was really No, I don't nothing about this to be clear the Coney Island in Cincinnati, correct? Yes to be clear which by the way, which is my Coney Island don't get me wrong Which is getting like raised I think at the end of the year. So it's about time. I'm just kidding. Yeah, right They're fucking fucking high-rises buildings. But anyways, well, so there's some housing I guess but no they're fucking giant pool

They're like, no, there's no housing. I'm pretty sure it's literally just Event space any more sick. no housing. I'm pretty sure it's literally just a vent space. And you know, sick. Yeah, sick. I know. I went there for the Appalachian Fest though. And it was so cool. Cause I bought a handmade broom from a child

who called his father, grand grandfather. And I thought, wow, that is the real deal. What? Okay. What are And then, okay, there was this 16 year old kid. He's like clearly like 15, 16, and he's dressed like in full on like, I don't know. He looks like a colonial boy. I don't really know the terminology.

Appalachian wear. And then his grandfather who has these little spectacles and like makes these homemade brooms walks up and he goes, grandfather, how much does this one cost? And I'm like, that 16 year old just called his grandpa grandfather. That's how I know like these two are legit. Like they're not just making up.

They're not putting on a costume and like going out, you know, to open a booth. Like they're, they're, it was, it was pretty cool. So then- You made a real Appalachian. What? You made a real Appalachian. I did. I felt super excited. And then they had a Navajo like flute performance. And I sat there for probably an hour and a half and was so mesmerized by the flute music. I started to cry. This is not a joke. I started to get really emotional. It was

so beautiful. And the guy talked about how he had first heard the Navajo flute when he was growing up and how he had first heard the Navajo flute when he was growing up and how he had learned from his mentor how to make them himself. Anyway, it was very cool. I went home and now at night, I listened to Navajo flute music to fall asleep. I don't recall.

I got thrown off when you said it was at Coney Island. Cause I was like, why the fuck was it at Coney Island? It was so cool. Cause it's huge. I guess, but like in the pool. Oh, no. On the ride that spins and you're like, your G-force like pushes you back.

Oh, they've covered the pool with like a stage. No, we were all floating. Oh. No, it was pretty cool. It was free. Anyway, if you get a chance to go next year, everybody should totally come. It was awesome. I literally don't remember why I talked go next year, everybody should totally come. It was awesome.

I literally don't remember why I talked about this. And I feel like there must've been a reason, but perhaps not. Well, I guess related, I would love to learn more about Appalachia. I feel like I don't know enough. Oh, I learned a lot. But I sometimes watch that,

there's a video online of like about Appalachian slang and I've made like all my friends watch it. Oh yes, you've quoted that so many times. It's so good. It's so good, it's so interesting. A boo, a bal, wait. What are you thinking, a boomer? That's like a chipmunk.

No, a ballet, no. Ball hooten. Ball hooten, that's one. Ball hooten, that's like going really fast. Yeah. Yeah, ball hooten. A poke, it's like a paper bag. A poke, yeah, you have a coke and a poke. A dope, dope and a poke.

A dope and a poke. A dope is like, a soda pop. Soda. Is another one, soda pop. Dope and a poke. Remember when Miss Spencer made us watch that documentary about how people in Appalachia drink Mountain Dew, and I was like, this seems really offensive.

Yeah. So here is- What? drink Mountain Dew and I was like, this seems really offensive. Um, yeah. So here is, she literally made us watch a documentary about like dentistry and Appalachia because of Mountain Dew. And I was like, this seems like something you made up that you invented. That reminds me of the time that she, uh, brought up a, uh, a gay student who had recently come out, but not to everybody, I think, and put them in front of the entire class and made them... I think, if I remember correctly, I might get corrected by somebody, but she was like saying like, you're my brother or something like was being like way too was like, it was too much. It was awful.

Like, I just want to just hyper religious Catholic school. And she was our religion teacher, religious teacher, religion teacher, religious teacher. Yeah, that was a time. Anyway, yeah, yeah. Let's wait till after the episode. Cause I also have some memories. Um, we've got so many to keep going. I'm Peter L and I'm going to, uh, all these memories are rising to the

surface of my childhood. It was just like, cause I was too good for everyone. So true. As you said, I like boys and girls cause I was too good for everyone. So true. As you said, I liked boys and girls cause they were both cosmopolitan and bohemian. For different reasons. Yeah, cosmopolitan, bohemian. Yeah, you said that all the time.

I did, I did. And I said, Ms. Spencer, it's not a phase, okay? Pfft. Just kidding, there were no gay people in my class, wink. That's what we were told. Isn't that crazy? It feels like... Now all my friends from back then, I'm like,

oh, they're all gay. Got it. When you look at the numbers of like, I was like, oh yeah, we only had so many gay people. But then the previous classes had fewer, and then the future class probably had more. And it's the same shit with people who are, people get all like, oh, like, oh, like, now they're all being told they're gay or whatever.

It's like, no, they're more comfortable coming out. Like they're more- Yeah, it's like, where were all the trans folks 50 years ago? Well, I fucking wonder. Yeah, probably not feeling like they're gonna tell you. And the example that I've seen was at like left-handedness. Right.

So there was a huge spike in left handedness in like a survey and no one's looking at that being like, oh my God, like someone's like converting these people to become left handed. It's like, no, it was no longer stigmatized as much. Very true. Left handedness. And it used to be such a like a negative thing and you were taught you have to be right-handed. That's so true. And so like all of a sudden there was a spike and it's not because left-handed people didn't exist

beforehand. It's that they were told that they couldn't exist as a left-handed person and anyway so obviously very different struggle. But they're ambidextrous. What? Oh yes. Even more powerful. So true. All along they were just endangering us all. Wait, ambidextrous.

Oh my God. Ambidextrous? It's all coming together. It's all coming together. I'm gonna start a new campaign. It's called By Erasure. And we're gonna erase ambidextrously. Fuck God.

I was like, uh-uh. We? I am not part of this we. I'm not, uh-uh. I've said enough. I like just caught, I lifted my arm and caught a peek at my fucking sweat stains because of this episode so far. I'm sorry.

Okay, I have a redemption of LA Pride. TM, TM, TM, TM, okay. TM, TM. So this is a five star review by Sharon. Of this $33 experience. Of this $30 experience with a $3 surcharge for unknown reasons. Mysterious surcharge. Mysterious CSW related surcharges.

I think that's the plus in LGBTQ plus. Oh, plus three dollars. It's plus three dollars. That must be what it is. Oh gosh, who knew? Remember that time when I said that the A in LGBTQIA stood for allies and I got fucking. Christina, no, why would you say that? Cause it was like, it was, well,

I don't have a good excuse. 2017, like the first month of the, and that's why we're doing, to be fair, well, I don't have a good excuse. 2017, like the first month of the, of, and that's why we drink. To be fair, M who's a couple of those letters sent to me. Yeah, you're right. It is allies. So you know what? At the time we were both fucking roasted. Yeah, it's really bad. Oh my God. I still, I think I was sort of joking, like at the time I was like, oh yeah. And I'll be a for ally, but like, I wasn't, I don't think I was like of joking. Like at the time I was like, oh yeah, and I'll be A for ally, but like I wasn't, I don't think I was like genuinely saying this is part of the, that I think people were like,

did you just say that I'm A? And I was like, okay, no, like I know, okay. Okay, yes, I said it. I mean, yes I did. Come on people, have a sense of humor. Come on. Okay. I'm an ally, can't you tell?

Oh no, I can't. Yeah, I can't either. Okay. So this is a five star review of LA Pride. Here we go. Welcome to West Hollywood Pride out in West Hollywood, California. In this video, I am marching with the Beth Chaim Harashim Synagogue. And what a long walk it was, but it came with great exercise. In my second, parentheses second video, I am still came with great exercise. In my second, parenthesis second, video, I am still marching with the synagogue, and we are just about done with the very long march today, but it was quite enjoyable, as you can see. In my third, parenthesis third, video, I am on the Ferris wheel,

and I am very surprised that they were not charging for tickets to ride it. You can definitely see behind me of the following areas, which include Beverly Hills, Century City, Westwood, West Hollywood Hills, and even the Pacific Design Center. I want to personally thank the staff from the synagogue for inviting me to participate in their march for the first, parentheses first, to, parentheses two, videos back on Sunday, June 4th, 2023. Sincerely yours, Howard. Oh, so I don't know why I said, oh, it was posted on a woman's account, but this is by actually by Howard. Got it. Okay. And then Howard left. I mean, that is very binary of me. I don't know whose account it is, but it's a different name than the person who signed it, which is, I'm not going to

say his whole name, but Howard and then put of middle and last name. And then this is the, there's a whole signature here. Okay. So I can change the name a little bit. Sincerely yours, Howard Peter Smith, executive volunteer writer and promoter for Google maps and TripAdvisor websites enter West Hollywood Pride Participant-HPS. So he signed his initials also. I love that in the signature is like, hello, now I am a Pride participant. I get to add that to my resume. That is a resume worthy item. And you know what?

It just made my heart soar. No, it's cute. It's really cute. In this video I'm marching in the second video I'm still walking. Yeah like well you're still going like wow. But you can tell I'm having a great time and then there are these all these YouTube links unfortunately tragically travesty all gone all gone. No. And this was only written last year, so I don't know where they went. This is not a relief. The last one was partial relief.

This one is not a relief. The last one felt like I just was watching, like I couldn't get out of a bat. Like I was just wrapped up in something I knew better. I knew better. And the universe spared me. This one, I really feel like we're missing out. I agree with you. Oh, please subscribe.

It says PS. Oh, okay. Well, first of all, it says PS, please check out my YouTube video. PS, please check out my YouTube video. And then like links, well, PS, please check out my YouTube video. PS, please subscribe to my YouTube channel under,

and then what's his full name. So, I mean, maybe it's like now on a different account. I don't know, but the links themselves did not really. But yeah, that was that. I just've that one just made my made my heart happy you know me too and you know what if you want to watch some video people go to the beach to sandy you know we're not done with our rainbow washing we are rainbow capitalism or pride washing so much more to offer we have so much more of that so go to beach to sandy Water to wet YouTube page.

Clips from our episodes are on there, including this one. Including this one. Hopefully, unless we get banned. I don't know. I was going to say, that might be a problem. No, that was really cute. I did like that. I like that they have a ferris wheel.

Where the fuck is this? I have no idea. Like where in West Hollywood? Like this is in West Hollywood, right? Oh, the West Hollywood one, yes. I've been to that one. Do they just like close down West Hollywood, which would make a lot of sense.

Yes, and that's, have you ever been to Halloween in West Hollywood? Christina, look. It's the same vibe. You know me. I don't like crowds. I don't like being in places. I don't either, and I do this to myself, but. I would only go if someone made me go,

not made me, but if someone was like, let's go. Like most of the places I go to, I'd follow you around. I'd be like, oh sure. It was 2017 and I went with Alexis. So that's why I was there. Got it. Cause she made me do fun things and got me out of the house.

That, no, true. I feel like, like that time we went to that, Davey Waynes, right? Is that what it was called? The like, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would never normally go there. Do you know that I really thought you were going to talk

about the Glass Animals concert I won tickets to? Oh, that's different. And I thought you were saying Wavy Davey. So it's like, oh, wait, wait, sorry. I literally said Davey Wayne. I'm like, wait, was that the Glass Animals thing? No, no, no, I said it right. I literally had that same thought.

Folks, I'm sorry, this is a deep cut of how our brains work. I apologize. Anyway, yes, Davey Wayne's the bar. I was making sure I didn't mess that up, specifically those two two weird. Oh, maybe Davey Davey Waynes. Yes. Yeah. But yeah, no, it was a play. We went there because of Alexis and I

would never go back. It was like one of those things of like, it's like a night out in West Hollywood. Like, that's not a thing that I did unless somebody dragged me out of the house. And I was so uncomfortable. But I'm glad I did it because I was like, I left the house today. Now we can say. Now I can say I went somewhere. Oh my God.

I remember what I was going to say earlier is that when we're talking about left handed people, did you know that I once won tickets on Q102 on the radio because they asked what is something that I think it was like, I forget what percentage of presidents or like an inordinate number of presidents, I suppose, are left-handed and nobody could fucking guess it. And I kept calling, I was like, I know what this is. And then I got, I won. Tickets to the Appalachia.

The free tickets to the free event. No, I don't remember what I, some concert, but anyway, the left-handed thing, sorry. That's all. That's a fun fact. I thought you were bringing us back to Appalachia, like why you brought that up. Did we ever figure that out?

It's probably very obvious to people listening to the episode. It's probably not. I really hope it is, but like, I probably didn't make it very clear of a segue. I think they're used to this shit by now. Yeah. I was like, I remember what I was going to say 25 minutes ago about something that's also not relevant.

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["Beech Two Sandy"] Um, anyway, is it my turn for my challenge? down.com slash beach to Sandy. See you there. Anyway, is it my turn for my challenge? I think it's challenge time. Is it my turn to talk? That's your turn to only your turn to talk. I can just shut up if you want. Great. Even know what you're, oh, I do know what your challenges. I remember.

Well, it was from Brad and it was reviews that feature the phrase. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Ooh, now we're doing a Vegas show. That'd be fun. I know. I love Vegas. That is fun. That is my one that thing that makes no sense. I fucking love Vegas. So many people, so many lights, so much noise, so much constant shit.

Three things. I love it. Two, two things, three things. One, weed. Yeah. Two. No things, three things. One, weed. Yeah. Two. Your hair. No, you're done. That's all you need. Okay, two.

No, no, I don't think so. Air conditioning. True. Three, staying up very late. True. Four, dopamine rush of gambling. I mean, of course you love it. They're basically playing video games. Of course you love it. Like all day. And of course I love it. And so of course, if we go together, it's just all we playing video games. Of course you love it. And of course I love it.

And so of course, if we go together, it's just all we wanna do. Yeah. All I wanna do is smoke some weed, play some slots and lose all my money. Well, that was pretty good. Thank you. So this is a redemption.

No, it's not. I put redemption in the wrong spot. This is a one-star view of Boulder Station Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. The title is, What Happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas, NOT. Okay. Unfortunately, that was not my experience when I stayed at the Bed Bug Boulder Station on January 3rd to January 7th. I came home with welts on my back, face, arms, and hands. I called the hotel and was transferred to security who told me an independent company would check out my room on the 14th floor and that they would report back to me. So far I have heard nothing. It's now been 18 days since I returned home and I still have sores and

scabs on my body that did not stay in Vegas as the motto promises. I have stayed at the bed- well you need to read the fine print. The insects are not part of that umbrella term. Imagine if that's like how the phrase started. Don't worry the bedbugs stay in Vegas. Yeah all those dirty scabies that you picked up are gonna stay right here. Oh, scabies? I don't know, he wrote scabs and it grossed me out. I still have sores and scabs on my body that did not stay in Vegas, as the motto promises. I have stayed at the Bedbug Boulder station many times over the past few decades, but this Bedbug episode was my first. I expected that hotel management would see fit not to charge me for my stay, but so far,

that has not been offered. Because the hotel has daily maid service, I would have expected any infestation would have been caught when the bed was made and the room was cleaned up, but clearly that did not happen. Hopefully the hotel followed through and sprayed the room I stayed in so that future occupants are not subjected to the same pain and discomfort I was subjected to. If I don't get a timely response to my complaint and my bill isn't adjusted, I will no longer stay at any station, hotel, and casino property. If you decide to stay at one of their properties, I highly recommend that you strip the bed or beds in your room and examine the sheets before climbing into bed. By the way, I offered to send photos of my welts and sores to hotel security with whom I registered my complaint, but my offer was declined.

I wonder why. Like with the security, not even like customer service. Like, hey, security, you want to see my wealth? He also named him. Like I didn't include the name, but I'm like this poor guy, like poor Paul, he doesn't want to fucking see. Trying to go above and beyond, trying to like, you know, he wants your complaint to be heard.

Being here, you know, like being here. And then like, hey, this is, you want to see a picture of my wealthy back? Oh, I thought you were saying that. I was like, no, but okay, I see. You're saying, yeah, in this. Yeah, no, I think I can imagine it. You know, it's like, you want to see my scabs?

No, I believe you. I trust you and I believe you. it's like, you want to see my scabs? No, I believe you. I trust you and I believe you. It's like that thing I do with people where I say like, oh my God, this is disgusting, try it. And like, people get so upset about that, but I just want them to understand. Yeah, I get, I see, but I feel that way about talking to people I know.

You know, like if I'm texting somebody that I know or like D or like you, like, hey, you want to see this nasty thing? Like me, when I cut my finger open, hey, you want to see this nasty like hole in my finger? Yeah. But not to a random security guard or the like, let's say the Lyft driver that tried

to take me to the urgent care and then turns out it was closed so I just stood on this dark empty sidewalk until a new Lyft driver came to bring me to another urgent care. While Blaze and I were like FaceTiming you and watching Emperor's new groove in the background and being like what the fuck is he doing? Just me with a washcloth holding my finger. I think about that all the time. Yeah, it was really gnarly. That's anyway, so that's one of those things where I'm like,

oh, it was really gross. It hurt. It was scary. Blah, blah, blah. I got all these stitches. You want to see? But not to that Lyft driver. I'm not going to be like, hey, you want to see why you're driving me.

Not, no, no, no, no, no. I actually went to the doctor on my birthday and I said, I have a photo of my rash. And then I said, I'm so sorry. I know you probably hear that all the time, but I had to say it. And she goes, no, I love it. And I go, no, you don't. No, you don't. Let's be real.

Well, okay. But that's different than like, if you're like talking to a friend or family member who's like a medical professional. Like if I'm just constantly texting Blaze pictures of like rashes that I have, you'd be like, hey, Blaze. Well, Blaze gets that all the time. People would be like, can you show Blaze's picture? I'm like, no, why do I have to see it also?

Yeah, wait. I do fans DM you on Instagram. Oh, honestly, I don't check. I bet they would. I hope not. I really hope not. Um, because I have not helped them clearly. Uh, so I'm really excited actually about this next thing that I brought. This is a book I discovered on Amazon and it's called what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas until now. Oh, yeah. Oh yeah. Intrigue. Now this is listed under books, literature and

fiction, dramas and plays, which I don't necessarily think is the right genre. But let me read you. So this is by Michael Sidney. It came out in paperback March 3rd, 2023. And I would just like to read the synopsis on the Amazon page. Okay. Here's what the author says. I was inspired by an interracial couple. What? What years? Three? Yeah. Okay, here we go. Also, like, it just doesn't end up being relevant at all. What a start. Yeah, okay. I was inspired by an interracial couple. They approached me when I was monitoring the crowd in the casino where I worked as a security officer. The couple said, I bet you see a lot of things. And I said, yes. The

couple suggested that I should write a memoir. I thought about it and I did. It's titled What Happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas Until Now. Why does it sound so familiar? Okay does it remind you because it reminds me of that Santa Claus guy who's a mall Santa and wrote a book about being a mall Santa because people said you must meet a lot of people. Because I almost was like have we done this before? Because of a similar situation where someone approached them was like, Oh, you should write a book. And they're like, so I did. So I did. Yeah. And I'm like, so far, this little blurb. They're

already the first man is bringing up the fact that they're an interracial couple as literally the first thing you mentioned about your book that you wrote like It's come on real rough and I will also say that he doesn't even make him sit house sound clever in the rewriting of the event I bet you see a lot of things and I said Yes Like that's your you can't even if for the sake of, Zsuzsvk, get up like, could stick to the story. We wasn't allowed to maybe, yeah, true. You can't be like, and I said, you bet.

You know, like literally anything else, but I said yes. I thought about it and I did. It sounds like Eeyore to me. Like it's titled, This Book. I would read a book written by Eeyore, so. Me too. Me too. And so they say Eeyore was also inspired

by an interracial couple. What is wrong with people? Like who's, okay. So here's what I will say. I have a five star review. This is how I found this book. I have a five star review of the book. Of course, there are only five stars reviews

of this book, four of them. And I just want you to tell me if you find this review a little fishy, okay? Cause I read it and I went, who's writing this? I don't know. Okay. This is called awesome Vegas book. It's a verified purchase by Kelly.

I know Michael Sidney has written a great book about Las Vegas. I own it. I have read it twice. Description, right? Like what? The way he said earlier, I thought about it. And I did. I wrote a book. Yeah. When Amazon asked me if I should write a review, I said, yes.

I thought about it. I said, yes. I own it. I have read it twice. His description of live events that happened are great stories for him to share. okay that's the vaguest thing that's ever happened. his description of events are great stories for him to share. can't wait for his next book. kelly flannery parentheses fan. oh. so i mean i don't know i'm not saying it's him but like I feel like it's either someone who knows him or like How many reviews does this book have total for? Okay. Yeah five stars look maybe to someone who's just has the same writing style and likes this kind of you know

So right. You're like I just Works for me. Yeah, I mean they're verified So, and it says it's in paperback. So, you know, it's not like, I mean, I don't know what that means. It's not like what? What does that mean? It's not like, I don't know. It's not like you don't know.

You're right. It's not like it's just a PDF somewhere. Like he actually had this thing printed. So. Yeah. Published. Anyway. Nice. So that's that. And then what else do I have? Oh, this is from Stephanie again, she, they, So yeah, published. Anyway. Nice. So that's that.

And then what else do I have? Oh, this is from Stephanie again, she, they, this is another cruise critic link. And I just like, it's sort of a review. It's a reflection. How's that? It's a reflection. I don't know.

I don't know how that is until after. Okay. So let's see. This is by cool cruiser T. Ellis. Oh no. Why do you think I keep coming back? I can mind my own business with a big smile on my face in lovely weather and do whatever I want. It's almost like that in Fort Lauderdale. Miss 411, you've heard that crock of total BS saying what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas? That's the biggest cockamamie crock of BS I've ever heard in my life. I don't do Vegas, my buddies do.

They go to Vegas, every single thing they have including themselves stays in Vegas, in jail, they're not broke their bankrupt because they left everything in Vegas. Now what happens in the islands definitely stays in the islands especially on st. Thomas. I don't blend in but there are so many other cool cruisers it don't matter. Always wear a hat and sunglasses, tilt my head, nobody knows me, sun gloss emoji, smile emoji, sun gloss emoji, chill, have cocktails all day long, whatever wherever I'm going, I can smoke a blunt walking around anywhere. Nobody cares in an atmosphere and environment like St.

Thomas. Got any better ideas? Fire away in the meantime. See you soon. What the fuck? So that's the reflection. And then that here's three weeks later, a response. Reflection is accurate as fuck. I'm glad you said reflection. You're so right. I felt like that was the most fitting word. Here's just a brief response from three weeks later posted three weeks later by middle-ager. Okay.

Cool cruiser. How much does the open-air safari bus cost from cruise pier to Koki Beach per person? Thanks. And then T Ellis responded like I think it was about $25 So like they wrote this whole thing the person's like well, how much was that tour and he's like that's hilarious I didn't I was like did they even mention that it was like an earlier somebody it was somewhere in there Yeah, so he didn't really get the kind of it sounds like they were searching that phrase in the form Maybe to like get info and they just wanted to find someone who skipped all the emojis, skipped all the... Yeah, there wasn't even an eek in there, but that's okay. That's true. Yeah, that would have pushed me over the edge.

I think that it was okay. I was teetering. I was teetering. Yeah, you were. I felt it. So they were like, it's a crock of shit or whatever, cockamamie something, that everything stays in Vegas, whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. But then was like, all of, everyone is staying in Vegas because they're in jail. So they kind of were like proving the point of the phrase.

I think, well, I think in a more technical literal sense, but I think since the phrase, considering the phrase means you don't share your stories outside and he's like, oh, let me tell you, we all know what happened in Vegas. It's not a secret. That might be more what he's referring to. Although it sounds like he's ready to blow the whistle on himself for smoking a blunt in public.

So I guess he's not really that concerned about his staying in the islands. What islands? St. Thomas, he said. St. Thomas Aquinas concerned about his staying in the islands. What islands? St. Thomas, he said. St. Thomas Aquinas? Yeah, that's the only, that's the only St. Share, share to your timeline. You won't.

Share to your Facebook wall. If St. Thomas, the only St. Thomas you know is St. Thomas Aquinas. Share with seven people. Where God doesn't love you. Jesus is crying, don't you see? This watercolor. Oh man.

Okay, so here is- The worst AI watercolor Jesus has ever seen in your life. They spelled like Jesus with two E's by accident. He has like four hands. Just like an extra pinky finger. Okay, so this- somebody make that please. Is there a XT shirt? Jesus crying with four hands. Okay.

Oh my God. Oh boy. This is from Stephanie. She, they, it's another redemption and it's from, get this rate. My professor. Wow. That's fun. Yeah. So this is a review of a professor. And LV a what UNLV professor. I don't know. It's the only school in Vegas. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. University of Nevada, Las Vegas. Not even close. It's actually of... Fort Lauderdale. Montclair University. Montclair St. University. In Montclair. In Montclair. Yeah. I know where that is. New Jersey.

Yes, totally. You do know where that is? Okay. I literally thought. Oh, I thought you were lying. You were. Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Thanks. Cool. It's chill. Here's a five star. Well, okay. It's right my professors. So, and this is a professor named Fernando and he has a 4.9 out of five based on 35 ratings. 100% would take again. Out of five level of difficulty is 1.8 on average. So I wonder why. I might explain it.

Yeah, so here's some clarification. This is by a student written in 20. Mont clarification. Some Mont clarification. that's pretty good. It was not, Chris. We got too excited about that. Now I don't know what course this is, but it says C-U-R-R, so maybe like current events,

305, something like that, I don't know. Curry maybe? Oh, curry cooking. That would be not so, I don't think that would be an easy class though. I think that would be a lot of work. So this is, so quality of this review, they gave him five stars on quality.

One star on difficulty, which I never really understood if that's supposed to be like, okay, it just means it's easy. It's easy, but like, it's not a bad course. It's not like a rating system. It's like an enjoyable course, but it's easy. Doesn't tell you that. So here's the review, five stars. Wow.

I honestly cannot believe how amazing Fernando is. He refers to the class as Vegas. So what happens in Vegas? Stays in Vegas. That's what he always says. Smiley face. He has this loud, funny laugh that just makes you laugh with him.

It takes 30 minutes to take attendance because he just loves to mingle with all of his students. Honestly, take this class, you won't regret it. It's super easy. End of review. Oh, okay. That's weird. That makes me feel a little uneasy.

Red flag a little bit. Right? The way they put it. I just think the phrasing is a little like, uh, uh. And I will say this was written in 2010. And the tone with which you read it didn't help at all. Like, no, I know. And I will say, this was written in 2010. Didn't help at all.

Like, no, I know. And I obviously did that intentionally. But this was written 14 years ago also. And I'm like, OK, I just I wonder if like, maybe the verbiage would have changed by now. I don't know. Yeah. But like. I just think I was like, so shocked that this existed 14 years ago. And I was like, oh, wait, that's only 2010.

That's not even like that crazy. That's what's so scary, yeah. Oh boy. Like I was in college taking a curry class as this was being hosted. True. Yeah, but that was a five difficulty. It was, I actually put, but voted it a six. It wasn't even an option, but that's what it was.

You gave it the spicy chili pepper, but not because the professor was hot. Yeah, it was so hot. That curry was spicy. That's why they had to disable that. It got too confusing. So sorry, everyone. I got too excitable and I unplugged my literal microphone

from the mic. It was chaos. It was like so chaotic. I apologize. I'm back. Poor Zandy. I was like, I swear I have one review left and I just totally derailed. So- Well, I had to put my foot up onto my like computer tower and so I

thought I did something like at that time I was like that I like panicked and then you disappeared for a sec and I was like okay good it's not me oh yeah you thought I thought you you were gonna think you just like deleted me off the screen oh no cuz if I knew I could do that I'd do it a lot more often one time in high school I was at my friend's house and she was making something on Photoshop and we had spent like hours just like watching her do it. And then I accidentally crossed my leg over

and I hit on her computer tower. You hit on her computer? I hit on her computer. That's fucking weird, man. It was very cosmopolitan and Bohemian. You don't understand. No, I bumped the power button and I turned the fucking computer off and it hadn't saved. And I still feel guilty about it.

You should. It was ours. It was ours. Brutal. To be fair, she had to learn to share her files. I mean, save her files. Yeah, true. It was a life lesson. It was a life lesson I was willing to give her. Yeah, good job. Thank you. So anyway. I don't know what the fuck we were talking about. We were talking about rape my professor and how the spicy level is you. Yeah, good job. Thank you. So, anyway. I don't know what the fuck we were talking about. We were talking about rape my professor and how the spicy level is. Oh, the chili pepper, this curry. The chili pepper, we had to disable it.

And then everything broke down. And then I just unplugged myself from the conversation. So this is my last one, I swear. Okay, it's from Jamie Heathay and it's of Caesar's Palace. I thought I'd end on a positive, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Five out of five stars of Caesar's palace. And I can't wait for you to try and remember

all of these amazing hashtags. Oh no. Okay. I've been looking for some new ones though. Good, Alexander. I can't actually, what I can't wait is to hear your favorite. Can you pick your favorite out of these? No. Yes, I'll try. Then is to hear your favorite. Can you pick your favorite out of these?

No, yes, I'll try. Then I'll pick your favorite. I'll try. I'll pick the one that most applies to you. Okay. So this is a review by Joe and it's listed as a vacation. Five stars. Hey, listen up my friends.

So I just had the pleasure of staying at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas. And let me tell you, it's like the Colosseum of casinos. I felt like Caesar myself walking through those. What? The Colosseum of casinos. Do they not know what happened in the Colosseum? Well no, because they also don't appear to know what happened to Julius Caesar. Oh, true. Yeah. The amount that he says he feels like him. I'm like, you should be careful. Yeah.

You're making me nervous the way you're just jauntily walking down the hallway without a care. Yeah. So similar to why I don't go to parades. I also don't go to Senate meeting. I don't know where the fuck that happened. Right? Yeah, you never go to a Senate meeting because that- Is that what it was? Yeah. You never go.

And I'm always like, Alexander, it's so important for you to attend these and get some FaceTime with all the senators. Shake some hands. Shake some hands, kiss some babies. Kiss some baby. I'm not kissing any babies. Okay.

I felt like Caesar myself walking through those opulent halls, hashtag living large. First off, the decor is straight out of the Roman Empire. First of all, doubtful. I know we all know that, but it just felt like it needed to be said. First off, the decor is straight out of the Roman Empire, like I stepped into ancient history. The marble statues and grandiose architecture got me feeling like I'm in a high stakes game of power and intrigue. Hashtag emperor vibes. The rooms? Forget about it. They're fit for

a kingpin. What, you know what scares me is you mentioned how many hashtags and we've only had one. So that makes me think this review is very long. No, we've had two now. What's the first one? Hashtag live in large. Oh, I missed that one.

Emperor life or whatever. Hashtag emperor vibes. Emperor vibes, man, I'm already forgetting them. We're coming up on number three. They're forgettable. So, so far nothing worth saying is number one for me. This one you might like. They're fit for a kingpin. Plush beds, marble bathrooms, and a view that'll make you think you're sitting on a throne.

Hashtag luxury goals. Now the casino floor is where the real action is. It's as vibrant as a mob meeting with slot machines, jinklin like cash registers. I feel like this person has seen one movie in their life and I don't know which one, but it feels like their only understanding of the world is from this one film. Like a Brendan Fraser film. It's like Bill and film. Excellent adventure. They just like go through so many different, this is something.

Yeah. I think they don't get it. Like a mob meeting. What are you talking about? They're as vibrant as a mob meeting? With like cash registers chinging. Like, where are you going for a mob meeting? I don't think that's what happens in those.

Oh my God. Look, I'm on season two of the Sopranos. So you would know better than anyone. I have not seen any cash registers. I don't think that's what happens in those. Oh my God. Look, I'm on season two of the Sopranos. So you would know better than anyone. I have not seen any cash registers. That's probably not even true. You do keep texting me, hashtag high roller life, which is the next hashtag. Oh, I was like, that's a new one.

That's a new one. Mob living vibes or something. Yeah, mobster. It's as vibrant as a mob meeting with slot machines jingling like cash registers and poker tables hotter than a Vegas summer. It's as vibrant as a mob meeting with slot machines jingling like cash registers and poker tables hotter than a Vegas summer. I threw some dice like I was rolling in my own made man fortune.

Hashtag high roller life. That's pretty good. This is an AI trying to be a person. Are we all on the same page? I don't know. A made man fortune? Wait, it made sense to me. the same page. I don't know. A made man fortune. Like, may it made sense to me. They're trying to say manmade fortune. That doesn't even make sense.

But they said it like self made, like they're a self made man. Yeah. Yes. Yes. Yes. I think is what they're saying. Yeah. I threw some dice like I was rolling in my own made man for. Oh, maybe they mean mad man. No, no, no, no. What they mean, OK, it says maid dash man. I don't know why I'm trying to understand.

Made man, like they're made, they're made, but that doesn't mean like. They're made. Doesn't mean you're taken care of. No, that's a kept woman. It's like the male equivalent, there's kept woman and made man. No, like doesn't that mean like you've been found out?

Like you're a rat or something. Oh yes, like I've been made. you've been found out like you're a wrap or something? Oh yes, like I've been made. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So it feels like there's nothing that really correlates to this. Which is why I just get this kind of uncanny valley. Watching one movie. Yeah, it feels like an AI sort of tried to understand what Las Vegas is and like doesn't. Hotter than a Vegas summer. I mean, come on. Okay. I threw some dice like I

was rolling in my own made man fortune hashtag high roller life and don't even get me started on the food. The restaurants are like a culinary crew serving up dishes that even make my ma proud. that even make my ma proud. From prime rib to pasta, every bite's a taste of the good life. Hashtag feast mode. Oh my god, I'm feast man. That jumped up to the top. Hashtag feast mode. I did, I did, I did. I mean, at least it's clever. I think, I will say close behind though is uh, Emperor Vibes. Emperor Vib though is uh emperor vibes emperor vibes is so good that one is really good I had to hear it twice to remember it but it's still really good well there's some there's a really good one I think that okay hey well I'll let I'll be the judge of that but let me tell you this place ain't just about the gaming and grubb the entertainment, what are you gonna do? They got shows that'll blow your mind

from epic concerts to mind boggling magic acts. Hashtag mind boggling, mind boggling. Amen. That's the only time I'll ever accept that. And now- Was that actually what it says, hashtag mind boggling? No, it does not. I just knew that you need to, but I will say it just says,

there's a lot of N apostrophe also, like most words. It's hard to probably tell, but sit in on a throne, rolin, apostrophe, sirlin. Mine, bogglin. Mine, bogglin, it has an apostrophe. Is it mine? It's actually mind, with a D, and then bogglin. Bogglin, I don't like bogglin.

Bogglin, bogglin. It's not like a nevermind. That's a game. What Peggy plays in King of the Hill. Boggle? Yeah. That's not what I was thinking. I was not thinking. I was thinking of Boglin, which is a series of toy puppets distributed by Mattel.

B-O-G-L-I-N, like goblin, but with a B. But like you're dyslexic because of goblin, bobblin. True. Yeah. Yeah, oh yeah, not goblin with a B, goblin with a G and B flipped, you're right, because it's not gobblin. That would be weird.

That would be. Or wait, bobblin, I mean. Just keep going. It's sort of like a made man fortune. You'll never really, like you'll feel like you understand, and then you'll be like, just keep going. Hashtag Boblin. It's sort of like a main man fortune. You'll never really, like, you'll feel like you understand and then you'll be like, wait a minute. Wait a minute. And it'll slip right out of your grasp.

Yeah, hashtag Boblin. Hashtag Boblin. Boblin the Boblin. Hashtag Boblin. I can't. What did you say? Boblin. Oh, Boblin.

Hashtag Boblin. You're Boblin the Boblin. It's like being front row at a big mafia shindig. Okay, first of all. This person is obsessed with the mafia. And also who gets, okay. Front row. You're like getting tickets.

Okay, whatever. So first of all, they just did it mind boggling magic acts. It's just like being front row at a mafia shindig. Well, there was an episode of The Super Ams where they all got together and watched a Penn and Teller show, they just sat. Is that for real? No.

Oh, I was like, Alexander. Hey, not yet. Alexander, oh my God, you're only on season two. I have, still early. It's plenty of time. They haven't gotten into their magic phase yet. Okay. So it says, mind boggling magic acts.

It's like being front row at a big mafia shindig. Hashtag entertainment royalty. Now I got to give a shout out to the staff. They treat y'all like family, making sure every need is met. It's like having your own personal crew watching your back. Hashtag hospitality goals. That's pretty good. That was a rare. Yeah. That might be my hospitality goals. That's pretty good. That was a, yeah.

That might be my new favorite. That's really good. Hospitality goals. So my final say, if you're looking for a taste of the high life, Caesar's Palace is where it's at. It's like stepping into a world of luxury, entertainment and excitement that'll make you feel like the boss of all bosses.

Just remember what happens in Vegas. Well, you know the rest. Hashtag Vegas vibes. Hashtag all hail Caesar. End of review. That's why I tell you, I don't think he really knows how that story ended. Yeah. And I hope no one tells him. I mean, you could say that same about Caesar's palace, about the place being

named after the guy, you know, I guess it's named after Augustus Caesar. That's the only please share this on your Facebook wall if the only Caesar you know is the Augustus one. What kind of loser gets stabbed by his best friend? Am I right? So true. How did Augustus Caesar die? Right. So true. How did Augustus Caesar die? I don't think he's dead yet. Oh, he's not? No.

Oh my God. I'm so embarrassed. I'm so embarrassed. I thought he died. Oh, that's so embarrassing. Oh, fuck. So offensive. I'm sorry, Augustus, if you're listening.

I bet you're a big fan. He is. Yeah. Not anymore. Not anymore. Oh no. You. Not anymore. Not anymore. Oh no. You killed him off. Hashtag emperor vibes are gone because her emperor is gone.

I'm going to do hashtag emperor vibes only again. You're going to do that. What does that mean? You're going to do it. I'm just going to do it now. Oh, you're just going to do it. It's just me. I want you to do it.

Yeah. Cause I watched emperor's new groove on my birthday. And yeah, so I'm just feeling like Ember vibes is like, that's, that's, that's for me. Okay, I'm not gonna yucky or yum, I guess. Thank you as much as I might want to. Well, good job. That was quite the challenge. That was fun. Lots of good ones. Oh, well, good job. That was quite the challenge. That was fun. Lots of good ones. Now what?

I don't know. Thanks for listening, everyone. Happy Pride. Happy Pride. I hope you all have a very happy pride. You know, I hope it's great. Me too, Alexander. I hope you have the happiest pride of them all.

You know what? I hope that's not true. Yeah, me too. I hope not. I do hope that my Pride month is happy, of course, but I'd hope it's not the happiest. I don't think I deserve that. I hope that someday I get to drag you to a Pride party soon.

Drag? Key, that's fun. Oh my gosh, I met a drag queen recently. I don't know if I told you about her. Her name was Esther Marie Marie Flonase. You What? You have told me about Esther Marie Flonase at least three times. I forgot I forgot it. I am very happy to hear a fourth time about Esther Marie Flonase.

I forgot that you have been part of this conversation many times. But yeah, I did meet Esther Marie Flonase and I said, oh like the nasal spray and she's like nobody ever gets that and I was Like, okay. Well, I have chronic sinusitis. So I guess I'm finally your niche audience Well, it's funny because I said the same thing. She's like no one's ever gotten that All right, anyway, thank you everyone for listening We love you so much And if you want to see what our next themes are and submit reviews, you can go to our Patreon,

patreon.com slash Beach Two Sandy. If you want to see us live, go to beach2sandy.com. Can't wait to see you. And otherwise we'll just see you next week. Yeah, see you then. Bye y'all. Beach Two Sandy, Water Too Wet is a Forever Dog Production. Hosted and produced by Zandy and Christine Schieffer.

Edited by Marco Padilla. Cover art by Courtney Aventura. Edited by Marco Padilla, cover art by Courtney Aventura, theme music by Mavis White, executive produced by Zoe Applebaum. Forever Dog Productions is Joe Zilio, Alex Ramsey, and Brett Bowham.