Beantown Podcast - DMV Round 2 (02082025 Beantown Podcast)

Episode Date: February 8, 2025

Quinn comes to you LIVE to breakdown his harrowing DMV experience, discuss potential executive actions, and preview the 8th Annual Pledge Drive Telethon Fundraiser. Speaking of which, here is the link to donate! https://gofund.me/dd8f2c63

Hey, what's going on? It's Quinn David Furness. Welcome to my show. Quinn David Furness presents the Bean Town podcast for Saturday, February 8th, 2025. What's going on? What's happening? How are you? My name is Quinn and this is my show. Quinn David Furness presents the Bean Town podcast. I am the creator, host and and chief chief. That's not really a word chief showrunner of this program Shout out to our good friends in Pakistan Kyder bad who Kyder bad I like that It's like Kyber pass and Hyder bad all at once can see like how focused my brain is right now I did come in with copious notes,

C-O-P-I-O-U-S, but we're not on them yet. We're still listening to the intro music. Gotta have a good intro to get people settled. Pull up a chair, kick up a recliner, grab yourself a nice steaming cup of Joe. That's what I'm working on here. Midday here drinking from, I was going to say, my real housewives of Chicago mug. It's Rachel's. I don't remember where she got it. Maybe a white elephant gift or something. But working through my second cup of French press here. But to finish that thought, Pakistan, thank you for making us the 112th ranked comedy podcast in the great Islamic Republic of Pakistan. Of course, listener discretion advised when you're listening to this program,

number one will occasionally use some language. Number two, this podcast is objectively terrible. You know, it is not objectively terrible. I am reading No Country for Old Men right now. I started two days ago, about 50 pages in. We're just past the scene with Anton Chigurh in the gas station. What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss? And Llewellyn is telling Kelly McDonald or whatever to, you know, go back to Odessa and he's about to take off and go on the run. And then you got Ed Tom. Ed Tom Bell, what a great name. Great three-name character played by name. Great three-name character played by the incomparable three-name actor Tommy Lee Jones. But the

reason I mention it is, so I've never read No Country Full of Men before, Cormac McCarthy. I've seen the movie a million times, one of my favorite films of all time. It's like a, it's one of those films to me that's just a perfect film. There are, there's some films out there that are just perfection. I have no notes, no criticism, a hundred percent rewatchable. To me that is off top of my head. It's like no country for old men. The Fugitive, Empire Strikes Back is a perfect movie. I'm sure there's others. Obviously there are many others, but those are movies you can just turn on.

Superbad is a perfect film to me. I just finished reading Seth Rogen's book. I think we were talking about that last time. But it's crazy. I was telling my parents this last night over dinner. It's crazy how I have to go back and check, you know, exactly. Not that I will, because I don't care quite that much. But a lot of the film script is just taken directly from the novel. I don't know if I've ever come across something like that

before where, and I'm sure it's happened a million times, and I'm sure it's happened without me knowing it, but a film adaptation, literally just taking directly from the pages of the book. I'm pretty sure the majority of the scene at the gas station, you know, what's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss, I was reading it and I was just like, this is exactly the way the movie goes. It's absolutely nuts.

So kudos to Cora McCarthy for writing an awesome novel, and kudos to the Coen brothers for staying true to it. One of my favorite Coen brothers nuggets here is that when, and I don't know if this is 100% accurate, but this seems to be what people on the internet say. So you know it's right. When Bill Murray signed on to do the Garfield movie back in 2007 whatever it was it was directed by a Cohen, but it was co

HEN and he thought it was one of the Cohen brothers. So he said sure. Yeah, I'll do it And then it turned out to be like just an actual regular Movie about Garfield we were talking about Garfield last week because Chris Pratt is the new Garfield. But yeah, Bill Murray back in the back in the old days, 20 years ago, which ended up ended up a good thing. I've never seen Garfield, but it led to one of my favorite movie scenes of all time. Not a perfect movie, but still a great movie. Speaking of Woody Harrelson movies, No Country for Old Men and Zombieland, the Bill Murray scene is one of my favorite scenes of all time. I'll watch that like once or twice a year, just for fun.

Maple's Minute, we are joined today, co-host Maple. She's over here on the couch snoozing. She was very brave this morning. Well, yesterday we hit our new all time alone record, 35 minutes, which was very exciting. And this morning, it wasn't as long, but it was a big step. It was about 28 minutes. The reason why, Rachel's out of town.

And so it's just me and Maple. And I said, I am going to run. I'm going to sprint. I ran one of the fastest 3.3 mile runs I've ever ran before, And so it's just me and Maple and I said, I am going to run. I'm going to sprint. I ran one of the fastest 3.3 mile runs I've ever ran before straight down to diversity and back up. And we're crossing our fingers that she was good the whole time because she was on the couch when I came back.

Alert, but being very brave. Now she's getting a belly rub. So that was only 28 minutes alone today. Not a new record, but dad got to be as far away as a mile and a half away from home. Isn't that crazy, buddy? You're probably, she's looking at me right now saying, what the heck did you just say a mile and a half? That's awfully far. What if I had an emergency? What if I needed kibble?

What if I needed an emergency belly rub? Well, I gave you kibble and a treat when I left and we're giving you a belly rub right now. So that should check all of your boxes. That's, that's Maples minute for the day. I also had written down that every dog needs a hog. Our, our, my in-laws dog Bailey has a big squeaky pig. One of the most, One of the more irritating squeaks you could find inside of a chew toy. And Maple has a plush hedgehog, which doesn't get a ton of action, but he's in the couch rotation now.

He's on the couch with three other lambs. Kind of go between Snuggle Pup and Grinch and Max from Whoville and this Hedgehog. And there's other toys in there too, Maple. You can have more than four in the rotation, but you got to make sure there's room for you to lie down on the couch as well. That's Maple's Minute. We got a lot to get to here, so let's check off another box. My hot take of the week. This isn't that hot, or maybe the take is hot. The intensity level, the spiciness that I'm bringing

to the table, I don't have that much fervor, or passion, F-E-R-V-O-R, fervor, that's a great word. Speaking of interesting words and roots and cognates and all that stuff, I'm gonna come back to this hot take in a second It's not that crazy. I promise I This clicked for me, and I don't think I got there on my own. I think I saw something on the Duolingo reddit Subreddit Duolingo subreddit where I was reading something about Spanish because Duolingo does a really terrible job at Explaining why things are the way they are. I'm on day 402

of my streak, by the way. So you got to go, oftentimes go find external resources. It's crazy. It's quick tangent. It's crazy how bad Duolingo is at explaining things. They put in all these resources. They got 70 languages. You can learn Quechua or Yiddish, whatever you want to do. But they can't, there's no vocabulary or dictionary or anything in there, it seems so terrible. What I realized today when I'm talking Spanish, one of the most common Spanish verbs you could have is gustar, to like, or gustar, say, I don't know, I think it's reflexive, because you're always saying

me gusta, te gusta, se gusta. What clicked in my head was gustar means to like, and we have the English word disgust or disgusting, dis meaning, you know, opposite or negative or bad, and gust meaning like. Now we have the word gust gust but it doesn't mean like it means you know a big a big wind coming through or it's the move that Pidgey starts with in Pokemon Gen 1, gust. But it was crazy to me because in English we've got the opposite of gust or gust to like in Spanish gustar is to like so it all must come from the same place don don't you think, Maple? But we don't have, how did we get like?

Why don't we just have to gust or to disgust? That's Quinn's investigation, idiomatic investigation of the week. Idiomatic investigations, that could be a good segment. Sounds like a lot of work, though. I'd have to use chat GPT for that. Plowing ahead, our hot take of the week. I don't feel this strongly about it, but I'll just go ahead and say it. I'm kind of over Trevor Noah.

I've never 100% loved him. I never 100% hated him. But you know, he was back this week. He was hosting the Grammys last Sunday. I think it was and There's just something about him. I Feel bad saying this because I think deep down he's a good guy I've never read his memoir, but I've heard it's really good, but there's just something you know How there's certain celebrities out there. This is probably how you feel about me when you listen to this podcast

There's just a quick a quick tiny little twinge TWI and GE where you're just like something's off there something doesn't just barely rubs me the wrong way That's kind of how I feel about Trevor Noah sometimes just a little bit too Confident thinks he's way funnier than he is not to the extent of like James Corden. I let me set the record straight I'll take Trevor Noah over plenty of other late night people. We should do an all time ultimate at least 21st century late night host power ranking. Because don't ask me to get in there

with Carson and Alan and Parr and all that stuff. I just, I wasn't around 50 to 70 years ago. I can't have an informed opinion on these guys. But if you give me, excuse me, and we'd have to draw the line somewhere, but off the top of my head, you could have Conan, Jay, Seth Meyers, Fallon, Carson Daly, Letterman, Ferguson, Corden, Colbert, Kimmel, John Oliver, Conan, oh you think we already said Conan. And then there's some of the like midnight, you know, the ones

who came in after Carson Daly, the third shift on NBC. There was the, what's her name? Lily Singh. She's like Canadian absolutely awful just the first youtuber ever to be given a late-night show if you think James Corden is bad this I think her name is Lily Singh she she was like she had a moment for a second there about a little bit before COVID I think when she had her own show in the third slot after Fallon and Myers, but it did not last. And now the slot is for, I think it's Taylor Tomlinson has it, who I think is fine.

Not a huge fan, but I don't have anything in particular I dislike about her. Problem is I'm never awake at 1.30 AM Eastern time to soak it all up. And there's just a million other things I'd rather watch on YouTube than Taylor Tomlinson or Carson Daly. That's a good idea. We'll do some power rankings soon here. Email us, BeanTownPodcast at Yahoo.com. Again, that's BeanTownPodcast at Yahoo.com. What are the top 10 we need to rank? Because I think I probably just listed like 12 or 13. We definitely don't need to rank the Canadian Sing or Taylor

Tomlinson or Carson Daly. so that should help us out a little bit but we got Conan hosting the Oscars which I'm excited about Conan could do no wrong in my eyes every everything he puts out everything he does that's what I like about Conan he's so smart he just gets it so hopefully they get Andy Richter involved a little bit last thought thought on this, isn't it crazy? Love or hate him, and I think most people are kind of somewhere in the middle on Kimmel these days. He's not, you know, he's not on the all-time pantheon of late night show hosts, but he's

a tier below that. But what's crazy is he's the first, and I don't know my history on the broadcast network stuff but I think he's the first guy to ever get an ABC late-night show to rival CBS and NBC and he took over what in 20 or like 2001 something like that 2002 maybe and he's just been going ever since he takes the summers off they do guest hosts but otherwise he just been plowing ahead here. He's been around for 20 plus years. And of course, he was on Ben Stein's show before that. But it's crazy the longevity that Kimmel has had.

ABC absolutely likes him. He brings in enough ratings. People like to talk about Colbert and Fallon and Myers, and they're all good in their own rights, but Kimmel has just got the staying power. He really is the old school kind of archetype. He's never terribly controversial. I mean, he's pretty anti-Trump these days now,

but I think that's the case with almost all late night hosts. Can't speak for Taylor Tomlinson, I'm never awake at that time. On Wednesday, plowing ahead here, I'm gonna do my best to give you the version of the story and make it not last the full three hours that it took in real time. It shouldn't be that hard because what ended up happening was a lot of standing around and waiting. I went to the DMV on Wednesday. Now, we told the story last time I went to the DMV four years ago in Illinois, you renew your license every four years. Excuse me. Last time I did it to briefly summarize because I'm just on an all time hot streak now with DMV appearances. 2022, or excuse me, 2021 would have been the last time. I had to renew it. Ended up doing it on our anniversary, which is 2, 22, I guess it was 21.

For some reason, I thought it was 2022 when this happened, but that's neither here nor there. reason I thought it was 2022 and this happened, but that's neither here nor there. So what ended up happening there, the Chicago downtown loop location, which is probably the most popular one in the state was closed during COVID. Yeah, this must've been 2021. And so I had to, in February, had to go to the Elston location, which you don't, if you don't know is Northwest Chicago, had to go to the Elston location, which you don't if you don't know is Northwest Chicago, like Elston and Foster basically, you got to take buses to get there. There's not even a bus that goes along Elston. So you take some buses and then walk. Essentially, I woke up super early, took a train to a bus, then walked. It was very cold. It's about zero degrees feels like there are no appointments or anything. You just get there as early as possible, trying to do it before work,

and ended up just being in line for about an hour, like 6 a.m. in the dark. It was just very chaotic. You weren't sure if you were in the right line. I was pretty confident I brought the right documents, but it was the first time I was getting a real ID. So it was just a lot of nervous energy. Ended up, it was a situation where once I got in a long wait to physically get inside but things were moving things were progressing positively

Went through the line, you know took the picture Went to the window all the paperwork checked out paid Took the bus back home bus to the train whatever was up getting back home by like 9.30 in the morning. I was probably at the DMV for like 90 minutes. And I'm sure if you go back four years ago, I told the whole story about it. That was nothing compared to this. The pro of that, pro of this time compared to that time

was the transportation. I was already downtown for work. And so I just had to walk to the other end of the loop about 12 minutes. Every other thing, I guess other than having to wait outside was just three times worse this one. So here's the scene. All I need to do, renew my real ID and update my address.

You don't even have to update your address. I think you're supposed to online, but in terms of the physical card you have, physical license in your wallet, it doesn't really matter. I'm sure there's some statute online that says you should, but I didn't do it last time. I think my last license said I was on, I don't even know. It wasn't even updated that time. So I was like, you know what?

I'm just going to do it this time. You just need two documents for proof of residency. So all I have to bring is a print out a utility bill, print out a bank statement, and then bring a passport. I don't even think I needed my social. Cause I think when you, once you already have the real ID, you just need proof of, I think it's citizenship, signature, which comes from your license. And then if you want to update your address, two forms of documentation. So I was on top of that. I got all of that.

I even brought my social, even though I didn't need it, I was just like, this is not going to be the issue. And to be completely, not completely, but that wasn't an issue. It was never an issue with that. So I show up, I had a quick work call in the morning, 9 to 9.30, walk over to the DMV, get there about nine forty five. Walk in, everything seems very normal,

there's a line but it's inside and frankly the line was only twenty people deep that I was standing in. So to set the scene in this downtown location, there's multiple stations, if you will. So first station is just info. That's step one. That's where you go. You say, here's what I need.

They check your documents to make sure you have everything so you don't spend an hour standing in line only to be told you don't have everything. So you tell them what you want. They check everything to make sure you've got what you need. I got through that process. No problem. Took me seven to eight minutes in that line, no issue. You go back to another line, that's the picture line. Also, no problem

there. Probably in line for 10 minutes or so, not a big deal. You take your picture, you know, smile, not smile, whatever you want to do. I don't remember what I did when I took my picture because even though this is when I took my picture, it was not the first time, nor was it the second, or it was the first time, but it would not be the last time, not even the second to last time. More on that in a second.

So you take your picture, then you go to the longest line, it's where it's between the picture and all the kiosks. You know, they have like 10, 10 desks basically. And most of them are staffed, uh, especially at, you know, 10 AM on a Wednesday it's, it's full throttle. Here we go. So you're in that line. It's taken a while, but I'm probably in it for 15 minutes, 20 minutes, nothing crazy. You're just on your phone doing whatever. So get called up to the kiosk or to the next station. So this is where the magic happens. You've already done an initial check of your documents. You've got your photo taken. So now what you do is you actually go up there. You hand them the documents. They scan everything,

and then they process it in the system, and then they print out a completed form, which the end goal is to then take it to the cashier so you can pay for it and check out and leave. This is where the fun begins. And I want to say before I go any further on this story, this from what they announced to us, what happened was a statewide IT error, whatever. It was nothing to do with, as far as I was told, nothing to do with the employees at this physical location being bad at their jobs. So I'm sure it was a hellish day for all the DMV employees across the state.

Certainly was here in Chicago. That doesn't make me any less frustrated by the situation. And I was frustrated. I don't remember, by the time the day ended on Wednesday, and of course I had to work late, I don't remember the last time I felt this just pure anger, frustration, getting pissed off at the most minute details. Everything that happened to me the rest of the day was just absolutely sucked ass. It wasn't a day where I did my run and I felt better after.

I was just charged up the whole time. So I'm at the kiosk and all of a sudden, ladies like, huh, your picture's not showing up. Did you take your picture? And I'm like, definitely. I mean, this place is running like, you know, clockwork. I'm following the lines, everything. No issues up to the, oh, I forgot. I was going to say no issues up to this one.

This was an omen and it ended up having nothing to do with anything else that happened. But when you take your picture at that kiosk, at that stall, you walk up, you're supposed to sign just to confirm that you took your picture. So I sign, it's my normal signature. It's really just like a big cue and then like two or three quick scribbles and then just like a straight line off

left to the right, horizontal. It's been my signature ever since I was probably 16, 17, something like that. It's been that way ever since I was probably 16, 17, something like that. It's been that way for a long time. It's not exciting. It's very basic, probably pretty easy to replicate. So I sign on the e-sign little electric pen and pad sort of thing for the guy after I'm taking my picture,

but before I jump to the long line. And he's like, is that your signature? I'm like, yep. He's like, that your signature? I'm like, yep. He's like, are you sure? I was like, yeah. Like, what are you supposed to say in that instance? Like, oh, shoot, I really messed up my signature. I guess I'm going to do a different one now.

I was like, yeah, that's my signature. Like, what the fuck? And he's like, OK, well, keep your fingers crossed they accept it. And I didn't say anything because I was like at that point you can't be like oh what should my signature look like let me try to do it it's like no I did I gave you my best signature okay and that he wasn't a dick about it but he was just like better hope they better hope that works and I was like already I had a pit in my stomach I'm like oh shoot I'm gonna get

all the way to the end of this and and they're going to send me back. To do something, I don't know. What are you supposed to do? Just keep signing until they like what they see? I don't know. Back to the present. So I get to the line. She's checking my documents.

She says, oh, no, my picture's not there. And all of a sudden, you start to notice everyone else, every other worker's having this issue. Because there's like 10 of them all lined up in a row behind a long counter with all the different stalls. And so I'm like, oh, this is frustrating. But you know what it is, what it is. Finally, I was probably only standing there

for about five or six minutes. It's getting to the point of uncomfortable just standing there, but not terrible. Which is like, you know what, I can still process the form, I don't see your picture, but like everything else checks out fine. I'm sure it's just like lagging or something. So I'm like, okay, like whatever, not too concerned.

So then you go from that line to a very short looking line, only room for about 10 people. And that's to get to the cashier, where you basically take your completed form, you give it to them, you pay the 30 bucks or whatever. In an ideal world, you do that, then you go to the final stall, the final kiosk, it's like number 22 or something, wait for them to give you your temporary license, because this is how they do it at this location. They give you a temp license and then they mail you the plastic card, which is a whole other can of worms.

God knows we get like 50% of our mail here. So hopefully I get my license. Maybe I don't. If not, that's going to be great. Probably going to get to go back to the DMV. So excited, excited about that prospect potentially. So I get into the line for the cashier There's only like seven or eight of us in this line, but nothing's moving and I noticed that the people who are still at the previous

Kiosks the big long ones The people that had gone right before me they're still stuck there So the other people had not sent them through to the cashier like Mayan had sent me. So I'm standing there and I'm thinking like, okay, this is kind of a problem, but you know what? We're just gonna wait it out. Here we go, yada, yada, yada. And at this point, as I'm recalling it,

not even clear all exactly what happened, but to summarize, it got taken out of that line in a group, it wasn't me individually, it was all of us who were in that line for the cashier, told you gotta go take your picture. Of course, you're like waiting back now, you're going backwards through a sea of people who've been stuck here for the same amount of time

I've been stuck there, so everyone's getting a little bit ornery, cranky, and you're just kind of worried about losing your place in line, which ended up, to the smallest extent possible, happening. But you go back, you take your pictures, it's chaos, because people are still coming through in the positive direction and you're moving backwards in a negative direction. Get through that.

They're doing their best to stay organized. Feel bad for these poor employees. But end up getting a second picture taken, and then nothing else was moving, you know, towards the front and like the cashier line or anything like that. So my place was still there. We all walked back. I don't think it was the second time. I think it was, yeah, it was the third time, which I will get to in a second here, but I ended up having to help this lady who only spoke Spanish because they wanted they ended up while we were back in the cashier line after taking the picture the second time we ended up taking our picture a third time and I think that actually happened after the cashier but this lady was just like freaking out she's like no like already took it twice in the Espanol

of course so I was able to cobble together some very broken Spanish to say essentially something like, quieren tomar nuestras fotos otra vez porque la sistema es rata or something like that which I think means, and it's not perfect, I apologize to the Spanish speakers listening, but something along the lines of they want to take our photos again because the system is broken. So that was my good deed of the week. I did that. But essentially what happened was finally get, or quick, quick side story that I forgot to mention that didn't really come to fruition. Thank God, because I was, I did not want to get pulled into this. So while I was in the cashier line, I think right after, before or after we took the

photos the second time, there was this white lady in front of me, probably about 60 years old, you know, pretty average looking. And this black gentleman, and then ended up being this like 25 year old white kid, tall and lanky, who apparently from eavesdropping had just moved to Chicago and was updating his license. But this lady was going to an anti-Trump rally later on in the day, I think it was at noon. And this was still, you know, like 11am, something like that. And she was just one of those people who I tended to agree with everything she was saying politically very left-leaning but she was just talking the whole time and would just bounce from oh Trump did this

to oh Musk is doing this now just like have like 90 minutes straight of NPR regurgitation and again not taking any sort of political stance on that stuff but what was scary to me wasn't that like her political views? But just she was roping these people the person behind her into the conversation the person in front of her into the conversation And I'm the next one up. I'm behind this black guy, and I'm just like oh my god Like do not rope me into this conversation. This is not what I want to do at the DMV at 1130 a.m. On a Wednesday This is not what I want to do at the DMV at 1130 a.m. on a Wednesday. Eventually, the three of them, they become great buds and they end up leaving because the system's still down, the line's not moving, so they're talking to one of the supervisors and they're

like, if we leave now but keep the paper, can we come back a different day? And apparently, everything resets at midnight, so you can leave the line and come back and join that place in line, in theory, if you ask for Linda the supervisor And she's still around otherwise you're gonna be you're gonna be fucked frankly But they ended up leaving the line with the intention of coming back later in the day now spoiler alert I did get out of there successfully at the end of the day and the line was wrapped around the block so If they came back they were gonna have to deal with all these people with know, pitchforks trying to crucify them for jumping the line. So good luck to the three of them.

I don't know what ended up happening. I hope you guys had a great fun adventure together at your anti-Trump rally. It was cold. So I'm feeling good. They leave the line. So now I'm only second in line to get to the cashier. Spent a long time standing there, but to keep the story moving, eventually get up to the cashier. It's like some things are coming through.

Some things are not coming through. They still don't have the photo, but they're like, you know what? We know exactly what you need. It's just a real ID renewal. We'll check you out. So they check me out. 30 bucks pay for it. Boom. Get my receipt. They're like, okay, you're all set. Just go to, they say, you know, go to the wall. It's the furthest away, furthest you can get in the DMV, the furthest back. It's the last station. And so I go stand there, and there's, again, not a lot of movement, nothing much is happening.

They're not giving out any of the attempts yet. And they call my name from back there and they're like, you're you're you're picking you sure you took a picture? I'm like, Yeah, I took it twice. Yada yada yada myself and one or two other folks get to go back to the photo line. It's even more disorganized this time because now they're they're they're bulking in the elderly's. And so you're just like, I don't know if I should be like cutting in front of the elderly if I should be hanging back But I don't want to lose my place in line back by the cashier Very confusing frankly not a lot of direction

Eventually get my picture taken the third time Then this was the fucking worst I go back. I let them know like yep got my picture taken at this point It's probably 11, 11.45, let's say. So it's already like, okay, this took me, I was expecting based off of the Google reviews I read, cuz I hadn't been to a downtown DMV since I was in college when I was at the Thompson Center. I was expecting it to take me anywhere from 20 to 45 minutes based off of what they suggested online with reviews. This place is known as being the very fast, very quick express one. So I, now

you're, you're, you're at the very last place you can go. It's the window titled supervisor. I think it's like 24 or something like that. You're just standing against the wall. There's like three people in front of me. It's not completely clear what needs to be happening for me at that point. They just told me to wait and wait for my name. I'm like, okay, cool, got it. To essentially break down what happened in the most simple terms, when I checked out, you have this form. It's got all the details of everything that needs to happen, what you need to accomplish at the end of the day. The cashier, what I learned is the cashier is supposed to take it, process it, and then they just give you, they call your name, it takes a second for the state to recognize it, they print it out, print out your temp, they hand it to you and you leave leave and then you're good to go. But what slowly dawned upon me, and this was myself and two other people as well, in kind

of my pod, I checked out the cashier. She gave me the form back. And I don't know if she was supposed to do that. I don't know if it was because the system was down. I don't fully understand what happened. This was the biggest mystery of the day. So you're standing there, technically in a line, but the line is not moving, there's no one at, you know,

the supervisor window who is assisting anyone. So you're in a line to nowhere essentially. And I have my form and what I'm realizing, because at this point now, the system is coming back. So the system is working, things are moving again. I'm not kidding, this was one of the most frustrating experiences I've ever had. Not only the entire DMV process, but this last portion was just the absolute goddamn worst.

Everyone coming behind me is going to the cashier, checking out, they're taking their forms, and they're taking their forms and they're getting their their temps printed they're calling their names this went on for about an hour and so all these people behind me were getting their temps in and out they they had still been stuck in line for a long time they've been waiting it's not like these people just strode in off the street like they paid their dues most of them too but I had paid so many more dues than these people had paid and I'm realizing and there were like two other people Around me. There is a

Latino gentleman, I think his name was Rolando or Marcelo something like that So he's two people in front of me and then there's this black guy different from the black guy who was in the anti Trump pod in front of me and then there's this black guy different from the black guy who was in the anti-trump pod this you know for lack of a better for lack of being pc extremely homeless looking man with a looney toons jacket sprawled out on the floor wasn't speaking very coherently but like that's my pod it's me marcello and and black homeless looney toons man who is i'm not joking sprawled out completely on the floor potentially potentially intoxicated, I don't know. But he's got his form. Me, Marcelo, and Blackman, we all have our forms. And we're just in this line to nowhere and slowly dawning upon the three of us.

I don't know, I can't speak for Marcelo and Blackman, but certainly dawning upon me. And I see Marcelo getting visibly agitated as well They're like all these people behind us are just cruising right through no issues And we're just standing there like dummies with our forms in our hands the form needs to be on the other side of the counter here And of course there's no one at this supervisor desk we're in this line to nowhere What ends up having to happen is like every 15-20 minutes there's this this poor over extremely overworked lady who is processing all of or who is like getting all of the temps printed out calling people's names handing them she's got to go

through a little spiel like your real your your ID is going to arrive in the mail in two weeks if it doesn't come call call XYZ, whatever, dot, dot, dot. So she's got to do that spiel for each person. And there's quite literally been over a hundred people who have come in behind the three of us. We need like a band name or something. This trio of Marcelo, me and Black, let's call them Looney Tunes. He was kind of loony. I mean, he was not all there mentally. We're just getting boned getting bone. So finally Marcelo in between this lady calling out names from people behind us He's able to kind of shoulder his way up to the front and get his application to her. They end up processing it so then I'm behind Looney Tune Marcelo finally gets his stuff he's good to go and

Now I'm in kind of a bind because I want to push towards the front. I've seen that Marcelo can do it. And so I know what needs to happen. But you just gotta wait for the absolute perfect window because we are, this was what made me the maddest. We were not prioritized in any way. We were deprioritized compared to all these people behind us who just came in and cruised right through. I don't understand that. It wasn't like we were deprioritized compared to all these people behind us who just came in and cruised right through.

I don't understand that. It wasn't like we were hidden in a corner. They couldn't see us and they forgot about us. They were watching us and it's like, what do you think we're trying to do? What do you think happened with us? We were here way before them. Why won't you process our stuff? Eventually they call Looney Tune. I legitimately have to give this guy a hand, help him up off the floor.

He did not smell particularly wonderful, but they get him and to yada yada yada the rest of this, finally able to give them my form. You know, takes literally two minutes after handing them my form for them to print out my temp, to me and I'm out at that point. Three hours, almost on the nose. I think it was like three hours and two minutes, something like that. It takes me from start to finish. And so my takeaway is that, again, I don't hold this against, 95% of this, I don't hold this against any of the employees at the DMV. It was a system-wide, statewide error from what they shared. But what did piss me off is that that final step where I was for over an hour, like, why wouldn't they just, you had these people in front,

you just needed to process us. Me, Marcelo, and Looney Tune were just boned for like a full hour. Man, that pissed me off. So that was, what, 20 minutes we spent on that, but that was the DMV story and the actual thing lasted six, nine times as long as that. My God, I want to mention something that is not stressful, something that won't take three hours, something that is quick and efficient. It's getting your home inspected by our good friends

at Home Pride Oregon. When you need your home inspected in Central Oregon, go with an expert, someone safe, certified, someone that you can trust. Call my dad Steve at 540-410- I think that's what it is, 540-410-0316. That sounds right. Or email homeprideoregon.gmail.com. Home Pride Oregon inspection perfection. Of course, your good friends at the Samson q2u series Maybe I should have brought Samson in a in an amp to the DMV to say hey you haven't processed my form yet That would have been crisp that would have been clear Could been my own little sermon on the mount Samson when God speaks he uses a Samson Getting fired up just thinking about Wednesday And of course a good friends at cuts by Cuban keeping a clean shaven face. Last couple weeks here wanted to look fresh for the DMV.

Oh, the last thing I wanted to mention. I didn't even I didn't even go full, you know, full measure with updating this stuff. I updated my address, but then they asked you, do you want to keep your height, weight and eye color the same? And jokes on them. I've been doing dry January for the last 40 days now. I've clocked in under 200 pounds, which we'll talk about in a second here, which is a, it's nice to see the one 99 on the scale, but my license says I'm two 10. And so I really should have said, no, update it. But at that point, I was already just like, this is taking a little bit too long.

I don't want to mess anything up. And then the whole signature thing from the first time I took the photo where the guy was like, cross your fingers that they take it, never came back into play. So it was a bad omen, but nothing actually happened related to that. So I don't know what the deal was with the signature. It's just, it's my regular signature. It's what's on my license. It's what I signed right now.

It's what's on my new license, presumably. I don't know. When you need a fresh do something snappy or new, just call the experts at cuts by Q. Okay. Speaking of BMI, not BMI, but my weight, body mass index. I shared this with Rachel the other day, but I, so I, I've been aware of BMI, you know, they've got underweight, normal weight, overweight and obese. Basically they take your height and weight and then there's just a very simple chart. And if you're,'re well I don't have to explain BMI to you but it's pretty antiquated I feel

like when I weighed in at 199 the other day out of curiosity I was just like huh I don't place any stock in what BMI tells me but out of curiosity I'm like no I've been I've been eating pretty well haven't had a drink in 40 days or so like how's my BMI looking it's 199 for somebody who's 6'1 I feel like you know hey I'm not I'm not a marathon runner I'm not you know Chipotle or whatever his name is can show gay from Kenya But I'm feeling and I still got weight to lose for sure, but I'm feeling good about myself So how do I how do I rate on this BMI scale? I'm still firmly in the

Overweight category. I think I have to get down to like 180 something to be normal weight That's the top end of normal weight. It's like 184 or something like that Which isn't it's not egregious I wouldn't consider like 180 to not be normal weight, but the crazy thing is the under end other end of this spectrum the bottom end So this isn't even our trivia question of the day, but we can do trivia question part one What for someone who is 6 1 my height? What is the cutoff or the transition point to go from underweight to normal weight per the BMI

scale I guess I'd seen this before because I've been 6'1 for a while but I hadn't looked at a BMI chart for years the number oh oh yeah, there it is. It's a flat number, 140 pounds. If I'm 140 pounds, 6'1", I'm considered normal weight. Now one pound less, you go from normal weight to like concentration camp, underweight. But I told this to Rachel, I can't imagine what I would look like if I was 140. I mean, that would be physically impossible, I can't imagine what I would look like if I was 140. I mean, that would be like physically impossible,

I feel like. And BMI is out here saying, oh no, yeah, 140. Oh, that's normal, no problem. I had to go back into my memory and recall, when I did 2020, when I did a whole year off drinking and intermittent fasting, eating one meal a day, all that stuff. I was really into running and going long runs. My normal Saturday routine was like a 16 to 20 mile run. So I was going all out.

The lightest I ever clocked in at was after like a 20 mile run. So you have no like hydration left in your body. You know, This was in the middle of summer. I was at my Nader from a weight loss perspective. Low point. Nader is more like something is bad, I think. So this is just a low point. It was good. My Zenith. Apex. A-P-E-X. Great word. Where does that one come from? Apex. I don't know. I weighed in, and again, mind you, this is after a 20 mile run, so there's like no water in my body. And I hadn't eaten that day. I weighed in, I hit the 169 mark, which is just like, it's crazy that my adult body ever

touched 160. I don't figure it ever will again. I don't ever want to go on anything that extreme before, or ever again. With like not drinking and eating one meal a day and running 20 miles on a Saturday. Not really something that is interesting to me in the near future. At that point, with no water in my body, I still could have shed 29 more pounds

and BMI would have said, you know what, you're good. You're normal. And I have the pictures. I took like a before and after series, but I would do one picture every month, the start of every month, a front picture and a side picture. And some of those June through August ones,

because I kind of started to eat a little bit more around August, September. I still didn't drink, but I took my foot off the gas pad a little bit with the intermittent fasting, because I was just bored with it. But look, I'm far from a skeleton in those pictures, but you can't show me that picture from like August 1st, which is probably around when I weighed in at 169

and tell me, yeah, you're looking healthy, but you still got 29 pounds you could lose to still be healthy. And I know this is an exaggeration. I know 140 for 6'1 is the absolute bottom and before you're considered underweight malnourished and you don't want to be there. But I think BMI needs some updating. Not just like the hey yeah we're Americans we drink plus size everything. Big gulp, 64 ounces. I'm not going that far. I'm just saying like you show me someone who's my height who weighs you know as of two days ago 59 pounds less than me. You just not only can you not have any fat you can't have any muscle. So and I guess that's fine you could really bulk up and be like

175 and you're still normal weight so I get it, but I don't know 140 doesn't seem normal or healthy to me be am I I Think Trump should use an executive action frankly to update the BMI's I don't know what the jurisdiction is but considering Elon Musk is just out here with no real, I mean, he's the head of government efficiency, which is like kind of a cabinet department. I think Trump just decided it was going to be. So he has some sort of semi-official leadership position, but now, now Elon just getting rid of education. So maybe he could at least upscale the BMI scale. Other things Trump should use a executive action on. You know what? Here's the first thing I

thought of. Bring back Downton Abbey. Because I feel I've never seen Downton Abbey before and I think Dame Maggie Smith was part of it and I think she's dead now. I don't think you could you we could have to do a refresh or a revival. But I just feel like the country was a lot more healed and unified when we had Downton Abbey once a week and everyone just freaked out about it and it was the biggest show on television or on public broadcast television at least. And we could all just talk about it. Life seemed so much more simple back then when we had Downton Abbey.

Again, I've never seen it, but I feel like it really brought us together. I always, for the longest time I thought it was Downtown Abbey, which made me think, well, if we have Bean Town podcast, maybe we could have the Bean Town podcast. It's like Bean Town podcast, but it's British. And I know we've had some tea lately here on the show for Dry January. It's always tea. We could have a crumpet break.

Crumpet break is what I'm trying to say. Could have every once a month, it could be high tea. It could be a high tea episode. I could have English breakfast, which is bangers and a grapefruit and an English muffin, I think. I don't know. I had an English breakfast once or twice in Africa, but that was like eight years ago. So nine years ago, almost a decade. Mercy. Other things Trump should use his executive power for. Bring back waffle crisp.

It was a post cereal. It was waffle crisp. It tasted like maple syrup essentially, but in waffle form. They were tiny little waffles. They were like round or square. It was kind of like honeycomb but way better. And I was researching this a couple days ago. Waffle crisp completely gone from shelves now. But it wasn't like a staple. I think I probably had it five times as a kid growing up. Every single time I had waffle crisp it was like I had been spiritually transformed. Just an absolute delight. So post, if you're listening to this, please bring back Waffle Crisp. Next thing Trump should do, ban influencers.

Just across the board, executive action. Every time I go to the right page in Snapchat, or it's like the fourth page, it's one to the right of the camera i think there's another one beyond that called spotlight or something was just this its own cesspool so far as i can tell but these influencers are so boring sometimes i click through i'm just kinda

like keeping my finger on the pulse just like i was listening to kendrick lamar for the first time this morning to prepare for the super bowl i'm not even gonna make an official Super Bowl pick because I don't care about it to that extreme. Um, but it's just like, it's so boring. 90% of these influencers, though, her, their whole thing is just like, Oh, get ready with me. And they're just like doing makeup, trying on a hall from

Sheen, um, driving in the car, talking, you know, they're, they set up their camera when they're at the gym and they're just like, I don't know, doing squats around the stair master. And it's like, who, I know I'm, I understand and I fully recognize I'm not the target audience, but are the the nation's 16 through 22 year olds really so starved for Content that they just sit there and and these influencers will post You know, they'll have one video but it gets broken up into the 15 second segments or whatever But it'll be like 10 segments of just them talking at the camera

Like putting on their makeup and it's like you're, I was going to say, you're not that interesting. It's basically what the Bean Tom podcast is, but I only do this once a week and you don't have to look at me. You can, you can throw me on and you know, go run a five K while your dog's doing separation anxiety training, whatever you want to do. We just got to get rid of the whole influencers thing. You can't convince me that all these people are getting all these product and sponsorship deals. They're all funded by wealthy parents or selling, you know, feet pics online and just this whole

influencer economy. I don't want to be part of this world anymore, frankly. Next up, Trump needs to, this should be right up his alley. He needs to force McDonald's to bring back the dollar menu. I Resist the whole idea of oh costs have gone up so much that You know this McChicken was a dollar ten 10 years ago and now it's three dollars. That's not how this works. They are, they're using the whole tariffs and inflation. When I say they, I mean big fast food. They're using this as an excuse to say, we can, we can, we can charge up the wazoo kudos

to places like Chili's and Applebee's they're running like they're you know bottomless french fries soft drinks and an entree for like 10 11 bucks now plus tax and tip I mean that what comes out to about 15 16 bucks if you want to go have like a let's say and I never order this way, but if you want to go have, let's say a regular meal at McDonald's, a sandwich, a burger of some kind, medium fries, medium to large drink. That in most markets, certainly here in Chicago, that's going to run you about nine or ten bucks after tax. And you don't even get bottomless fries when I see, I think both Applebee's and

Chili's, but at least one of them, you see the ads and it's like, yeah, bottomless fries when I see I think it's I think both Applebee's and Chili's but at least one of them You see the ads and it's like yeah bottomless drinks and fries So you can go to McDonald's spend nine ten bucks and be Partially satisfied, but frankly if I was like fully hungry for dinner, and I was like let me have McDonald's I Wouldn't be fully satisfied from a drink, fries, and a sandwich. I mean, back in the good old days, I would get like four sandwiches from the dollar menu and that would fill me up. But the fries just kind of go right through you.

Whereas you go to Chili's or Applebee's, whomever it is, TGI Fridays, you can fill up on the soft drinks and the fries and you enjoy your burger and it's great. You leave full and you only spent $ dollars more and the food was way better so I Don't know McDonald's we got a we got to bring this back down here other things Trump could do speaking of fast food bring back the the legitimate Duncan offers Dude the glory days of the Duncan app three four years ago Not not only regardless of app, here in Chicago most summers for a long time

you could get two dollar iced coffee from three to six p.m. Now that's gone. That was a great deal. I would get that all the time. But the Dunkin' app for a while had great offers, you know, something similar to that, you know, two dollar iced coffee or $3 latte or, you know, order on Wednesday for $2 off, something like that. Just good quality American made offers. And now you go to the Dunkin' App and it's literally just like, it's all bulk, right? Spend $10 and more, get 100 extra bonus points. You need like 500 for free coffee coffee It's not the absolute worst thing in the world, but it's not great I'm not trying to spend more than $10 at Duncan. Okay, trying to spend like two bucks on a coffee Or you get the you know after 12 p.m. Right now is their best one and this is the best one

They've had in a while frankly, but it's after 12 p.m. Only get a Sabrina Carpenter But it's after 12 p.m. only get a Sabrina Carpenter Expresso drink for only three dollars plus tax It's like yeah, I guess that's that's better than nothing I mean I might do that one time, but I almost never drink coffee after 12 p.m. Anymore, so Trump's got to get on the get on get around the horn get on the horn with McDonald's and Duncan and take care of this last couple things here Needs to shorten the gap. This is more personal shorten the gap between valentine's day and my anniversary The 14th and the 22nd so that there's no awkward pressure to potentially do two gifts

If we could just do them all on the same day, that'd be great This one's come up recently permanent daylight savings time This whole conversation is gathering some steam, but it's gathering steam in the wrong way. People are saying, abolish daylight savings time. No, we need to go the other way. We need to make it permanent. I don't really care about the extra light in the morning.

Give it to me late in the day. I would like an official investigation into the chiefs and refs. That's been fun, because this is something I've been banging the table about for years and I felt being fixed to a certain extent. Not all out fixed, but some things they've massaged. And finally, this time around, it's finally getting national attention. People are questioning Goodell about it. People asked Mahomes which refs are his favorite to play for.

So nothing's gonna happen but I do feel slightly vindicated because I've been calling this for years and then finally no more filing your own taxes remember the good old days of Paul Ryan and the GOP and he said we want your taxes to be so simple you can just put it on a postcard now that was done to try to like Squirm your way out of paying taxes. I Don't really care so much about paying taxes. I just don't want you to make me go through all these hoops to pay them You know What I earned and you know what I paid you know what I owe. So why don't you just send me an email?

Saying hey Quinn. Hope you're doing great. This is Dan from the IRS. Here's how much you owe. Here's how you can pay. I hope you're doing great. This is Dan from the IRS Here's how much you owe. Here's how you can pay. I hope you have a great day instead of all the Looking I'm not naive. I understand why this isn't a thing. It's a turbo tax and Tax slayer and HR H&R block and line their pockets and lobby But I'm on year what like four or five of free tax USA, free federal, $15 for state.

I'll take it. Just finished this morning. And I just want to tout this accomplishment. It's one of my better bets. It's not a bet, but just projections I've ever made in my life. So quick story or quick summary of my income situation I've got my regular job my w-2, but then I've got a couple 1099 as well some consulting and some Software application testing more or less

What this means and I've been doing it this way for about five years What this means is on my w-4 and my primary job, you check a box that says I've got multiple jobs. Here's how much I want you to withhold extra per paycheck for both federal and state. And every year it's just a toss up. You know, there's a couple of ways you can do this. You can do, if you don't do extra withholding, you're supposed to, if you have any self-employment income, you're supposed to do what's called quarterly tax payments, which is, you know, once every, every three months you send the government a check, you know, just kind of estimating what you're going to make in the year divided by four, or you can do extra withholding, which is

what I've done. Cause then I don't have to do any extra work. I just tell my primary employer, here's how much extra you should take out and send to the state of Illinois, send to the federal government. So every year, it's kind of all over the place, because it's dependent on how much I make from these side jobs I have. And you just kind of have to guess. And usually, I'm pretty conservative I

Have more taxes taken out than need be which usually leads to a pretty healthy federal refund Which I know everyone's always like oh, yeah, I got money back from the for my taxes. That's awesome. Well, Matthew Feeler is a longtime champion of this Philosophy which makes perfect sense where it's like that just means the government's been holding your money interest free for 12 months basically. I will say it's still fun when like a thousand dollars comes out of nowhere and hits your bank account in March or April, but that's neither here nor there. Every cause every so my, my income could be a lot higher than I expected. It could be a lot lower than I expected. The point of this story, I finished my, both my federal and state this morning, submitted

them. They were approved and nearly record time, which is exciting. Four dollars is my, my refund. I ended up owing the feds 34 and Illinois owed me 38 So the balance of all that four dollars now ended up coming eleven dollars behind because I had to pay fifteen dollars to pay the state to file but or pay free tax USA to file but I do that's that's just

Like winning a game of darts on your first round of throws, if that's possible. Maybe it's two rounds you got to do, I don't know. Or you just like hit all the triple 20s. $4, pretty proud of that. For context, usually I get like $1,000 refunds and something like that. At first I was a little bit bummed. I was like, why is my refund so low this year?

In fact, I had to owe to the feds, which almost never happens. But then I realized like, I just kicked ass with software testing. And so I ended up earning more than I expected. So get it within $4. That's your, that's your bean town podcast clutch moment of the week. We got to finish up with trivia here as we hit the hour mark. We'll keep it very simple. We talked a lot about executive actions at the end of the show here So here is my trivia question of the week for you here

This US president holds the record to the most executive orders ever issued Okay And so before I get into any clues here Take a second to pause and guess more if you'd like. But the clues I can give, I mean there are obvious clues and then there's more subtle ones. To start more subtly I would say, if you know anything about this president and what he accomplished and what he did while he was in office, it makes 100% that he is the answer.

It also makes sense that he's the answer based off of just the time he had to get stuff done. Let's just put it this way, this guy was not William Henry Harrison, okay? He was in office for slightly longer than a month, slightly longer than one term, and I could go down that rabbit hole and give the answer away. If you're not picking up what I'm putting down so far, I guess the last things I can say is 21st century, one of the presidents who died well in office and a president that has the same last name as other another president. If you haven't figured it out yet, yes, the answer is FDR. His record is 3,721.

I believe he was in office for 12 years. And yeah, between the New Deal and all the wartime stuff, depression, a lot of executive actions coming out of FDR's desk. Rest in peace, big fella. Guys, that's what I got for you today. Thanks for listening to this program. Quinn David furnace presents the being Tom podcast. Thanks for supporting our show. Oh, last thing, speaking of supporting

the show, I'll keep this brief. We'll dig into this more next time. I did write it down. February is pledge drive month. The go fund me is open. It's live. I'll post about it so you can find it. I'll get around to that as soon as I'm able to we do have all new donor tier prizes this year it's very exciting and No, I have not completely confirmed the date of the telethon But I think we're targeting like Friday the 28th, maybe at night that could be some fun We will Publish it when we know for sure, but of course you can call in,

you can play games, it'll be a whole bunch of fun. But you can donate now to Quinn David Furnace Presents Bean Town Podcast, eighth annual pledge drive month. Again, that covers costs of the show, our audio hosting and our website hosting. And then as always, we turn it around, one for one donor match to a local charity, typically the United Way of Metro Chicago. And we'll be doing that again this year. So be on the lookout. The website, the GoFundMe is live, Google it, 8th annual Bean Town podcast, Pledge Out of Telethon fundraiser, and we'll see you there.

Guys, that's what I got for you. Thank you so much for listening to my program. Quinn David Furnace presents the Bean Town podcast.. You have any DMV horror stories, email us or post at us on blue sky and maybe we'll read it live on air. Probably. We love listener engagement. That's all I got for you. A lot of talking. I got to go refill my water. My name is Quinn. Everyone stay safe, stay sane because I'll check in on you guys next time. Bye everyone. is so yeah I'm going to be a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a

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