Beantown Podcast - Psycho Shower Scene but For Real (05202022 Beantown)

Episode Date: May 20, 2022

Quinn comes to you LIVE with 11 days left on the lease to detail the ever-worsening apartment conditions

What's going on? It's Quinnie and his furnace. Welcome to my, that wasn't planned. I literally got a tickle of in my throat and took a sip of water and then had to cough it out. What's going on? My name is Quinn DeVe Fernis. Welcome to my show, Quinn DeVe Fernis presents

the Bean Town podcast for Friday, May 20th, 2022. If you're looking at the Big Gound Town Clock, it's 11 days until we move out of this absolute hellhole of an apartment. We'll chat about that in a second here. What's happening? my name's Quinn. This is my show, I'm the key grip. I'm the chief catering officer

and the assistant wardrobe manager here on this show. Tell you what, easy job today, throw on some boxers, throw on some shorts, you're good to go. It's toasty outside in Chicago. But not, you know, it's about 745 in the morning right now. It's not too bad.

It's 68 degrees. Here's a crazy thing. My apartment right now is like perfect. It's like completely comfortable. I can wear shorts and a t-shirt, you know, no socks, anything like that. It's very straightforward.

But the reason I mentioned it is because if it gets any cooler outside in Chicago, my apartment gets really cold and the crazy thing is You know, it was in the 80s estuary. I think it's gonna be the 80s today But I'm sitting here on the couch this morning preparing for the show Which consisted of me sitting on my couch in silence for 10 minutes thinking about God, what can I talk about? And I didn't come up with anything. But the air conditioner above me, the unit above me is using their air conditioner, which is just wild to me. I don't think I'm that crazy with not using the AC.

It's absolutely not hot in here right now. I use the AC and you hear like once or twice last summer, but I just got this beautiful tower fan that just blows anything else away when you're sitting next to it, literally inf figuratively. So, I don't know. I just can't imagine the people above me sleep with the AC on when it's in the 60s, but that's that's their preference. I guess I respect their Fifth Amendment rights, whichever amendment that is Speaking of amendment, right? What's the one with the warrant? Is that the fourth amendment or even better?

What's the one where it says that the troops can't come in and use your your quarters Q, U, A, R, T, E, R, S as their residency. That's the one I need to start exercising because, and I'll mention this before we go any further, listen to discretion, is advised when when you listen to being sound podcast number one, we'll cage you some language number two's podcast, subjectly terrible. We chatted last week about people coming to see my apartment and my lease is up in 11 days and landlord's trying to get someone in here in June 1st

and I totally get that, I totally respect that. But Chicago has pretty straight forward, pretty standard kind of lease terminology or language regarding when your apartment can be shown. So your landlord cannot show it until there's 60 days or less remaining in your lease. Okay, so that's fine. But the big thing is you have to receive a tenant to have to receive 48 hours notice from the landlord before someone comes to see your apartment. And I think we chatted about this slightly last week, but I'm happy to do that.

Look, if I'm not around, yeah, I'm at work or something, you can come see my apartment. It's going to honestly, going to take you 20 seconds to walk in, check out the bathroom, the kitchen, the living room or one space bedroom, closet. It's going to take you 20, 30 seconds tops. But here's the thing, last weekend, it all kind of came to a head. I think we were chatting about this slightly because I recorded last Sunday morning. But basically,

though like the final note to that story or the final chapter, if you will, I think I had mentioned that they were, you know, planning to or saying my landlord was basically saying or at leasting agent from the service, my landlord uses had texted me Saturday night. Be in like, hey, can we be, can we get in there on Monday afternoon to show the unit? And I was like, sure, yeah, that's fine. Hey, and I didn't say this, but like technically that's under 48 hours, but whatever. But then he texted back and was like, Hey, can we also come Sunday, which was tomorrow, which was the day I record at 5.30 p.m. I think. And at that point, I was like, you know what? No, I'm probably gonna be home. Cooking dinner, watching TV, watching, you know,

buck Celtics, game seven or something, just like, not so much, because I think I'm a pretty like flexible and accommodating, and I have been a very flexible and accommodating person because not only have they been coming into my apartment with less than 48 hours, but they've also been coming in unannounced. Like I've had days not so much this week, but last week where I am a way of, you know, normal work day, I'm in my office and I come back home when they've been in my apartment with and no one had told me they were coming in the apartment, which is totally not okay.

Anyways, so I've been very just like chill, very flexible, very accommodating, cause I know like, hey, nothing I really do is gonna like change anything for me. I just want to get out of here on May 31st, which is what's going to happen. I'm going to start packing for your God. I hate moving. But the not the final straw, but just a really who knows

it's the final star. if it's the final straw. Hopefully it's the final straw. I don't know. I don't want there to be any more straws left after this. The thing is, I was showering Sunday afternoon, maybe like three, four o'clock, something like that. And I had to, well, so basically I told them like, when they texted asking if they could come in, you know, at 5.30 on Sunday, I was like, you know, normally, and I think you guys know this,

I'm very accommodating, very kind, but like I'm gonna exercise my tenant rights here and say, you know, not this one, because I think I'll be at home. And at the time, that's what I thought was gonna be. Well, you know, I thought it was gonna be at home, and I was just like, eh, I don't wanna put a shirt on. I don't, you know, whatever, It's my Sunday like you blew it.

You could have texted me on Friday morning and requesting and I would have had to do it and that would have been your right, but now it's my right. What I was doing is not so much being like, oh, I'm standing up for myself. I just, and I don't know if it's gonna make any difference. My landlord is this nine year old Greek lady,

but I just wanted her to know like, hey, you know, I'm sure she knows this. I'm sure she's just taking advantage of people, but it's like, hey, you know, your tenants have this right specifically outlined in the lease. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna make a slight stand about it, a slight fuss about it, and you're gonna just have to decide what you want to do one way or another. And it was hilarious. I basically texted her that Sunday morning, and she called in lots of voicemails Sunday, like midday I was at the lake after recording the show, just hanging out drinking a nice coffee. Actually a nice latte, I was feeling real bougie and it was one of those things where all the milk is at the bottom and I tried my damnedest to mix it up but it just wasn't working so by the time I got to like a quarter left of my latte I couldn't drink it anymore

it was just like milk basically. Anyways she left me a voicemail and I haven't gone back and listened to it because it upset me so much But basically saying like yes, we're gonna be coming around later today Just be nice. That was that was the one phrase that stuck out to me. She told me to be nice This like nine-year-old Greek lady leaving a voicemail on my phone and I was just like, well, F that, I went back home and I was feeling really just like, let God last Sunday sucked.

For a variety of reasons, one, I was feeling so anxious about everything that was going on with that. Cause I just hate it when people come into my home unannounced and even just knocking on my doorbell and stuff. I could get a knock on my door, bringing my doorbell. I get a lot of anxiety about that. For better or for worse. But it was also the first day I started getting sick.

And we can talk about that in a second, although there's really not that much to tell. I'll tell you right now, basically I thought it was allergies at first, sore throat. And then I took a COVID test. I'm Monday, it was negative, but this whole week I've had basically cold symptoms. From what I've read about the latest strain of COVID, it kind of sounds like that, where it like imitates allergies symptoms. So I'm not, I guess it's just a common cold.

I'm not quite sure guess it's just a common cold. I'm not quite sure, basically nothing crazy. It's just sore throat, which isn't so bad these days. It was pretty rough on Monday and Tuesday. Congestion, pretty bad runny nose. And voice is a little just like down in the dumps here. I definitely couldn't couldn't do any good songs for you all and I also in case you're in case you only listen to this show now starting the last month just for right on

Q segment we're we're taking a break today we'll be back shortly I promise it's a hot new segment I updated the website and everything so you know it's not going away. It just takes me an extra 30 seconds before the start of the show to record that segment and I just couldn't bring myself to do it today. So it's not COVID. I've tested negative for COVID. So I think this is a cold, honestly. I haven't had a common cold in, I don't know, a long time. And so it's really not the end of the world. I haven't had any sort of fever at any point. I really haven't felt that fatigued, to be honest,

which I know was like a signature symptom of COVID. And, yeah, so mostly it's just been like, dealing with the sore throat. And then the last two or three days has been a lot of just like nasal congestion, running nose, blowing my nose, a shit ton, like a ridiculous amount. And of course me, who gets bloody noses

at the drop of a hat, you constantly have to navigate like how hard do I blow? I don't want to start bleeding, you know, all that stuff. It's a lot of fun. So this week, that's pretty much all I've been thinking about. I haven't had time to cultivate the comedy classics that you all come to expect out of this show. And I'll tell you right now, it's going to be a short episode. It's not going to be that funny. And I mean, hey, that's that covers 90% of our episodes so far, but there's still time to bring up the rear. Change that ratio. Okay, so to finish this story last Sunday was hell. After I received the voicemail telling me to be nice because they're coming in, lock, stock, and barrel.

I went home and I was like, shit, I, again, I just don't wanna experience this because they're gonna do what they wanna do. If you're curious to like legal ramifications, basically you have to like file and injunction all this paperwork and then you could potentially receive like rent back for one month But I have to go like find an attorney and all that stuff and I was just like and I still feel in this way

Like I'm not gonna do that When I got freaking 11 days left that my lease here although last week it was 16 days whatever And my landlord knows that she knows how much of a pain in the ass, I'm sure. It is to go through all those steps as a tenant. So that's why she's so willy-nilly taking advantage of people, I'm sure. Anyways, so and if you're curious, because I think this popped up last week of the show as well, the like leasing agent who had been texting me was like, oh yeah, Mike told me it's okay. I had no idea who Mike was. I eventually learned from the leasing agent who had been texting me was like, oh yeah, Mike told me it's okay. I had no idea who Mike was. I eventually learned from the leasing agent. Mike is my landlord's son, who I've never met. I don't know anything about him. Whatever, apparently he's taken over

the family business succession style. So I get back home. It's like three o'clock in the afternoon, two o'clock, two thirty maybe. And I'm like, I just got to get out of here. I don't want to be around for any of this because it's like, what would happen? It's 5.30am here on the couch, they ring the doorbell. They'll come in because clearly they are happy to let themselves in. And then I'll just be like holding my lease up in front of them, being like, no, I have this right. And then what are they going to do? Be like, well, we'll just be like 15, 20 seconds. And obviously, I'm not going to physically obstruct them. I mean,

this is all this is all way too way too silly, right? To just try to enforce my, my legal rights. So I'm like, let me just hop in the shower. let me clean up, I'm going to grab my stuff, I'm going to go sleep at Rachel's tonight. Which thank God, 12 days, literally 12 days, you're going to listen to this episode, you're going to listen to one more episode, and the next thing you know, like, all of this will never be a problem again. And when I say it, problem again, I mean, like, pack it, my stuff to go sleep at Rachel's, which I love to do, but it'll be so nice when Rachel's is also mine.

So, like, I hop in the shower and it all comes to a head because next thing I know, there are people in my apartment viewing the place and it's just like, you gotta be kidding me. Not only, so you're gonna just let yourself in, viewing the place and it's just like you gotta be kidding me. Not only, so you're gonna just let yourself in because I told them I was gonna be home, so they knew I was home.

They must have knocked, I don't know, I didn't hear it, my shower was running, or maybe they didn't knock, I don't know, I don't know what they're up to. I have had and I haven't shared all the horror stories of this apartment because it I really don't feel much like joy. Thinking about it or even like sharing my grievances with with you all the listeners. People I've had certain people come into this apartment unannounced. No knock just unlock the door and come in and that's really freaky. Especially in this apartment because it's so small, my living room, the front door leads directly into the living room. There's no separate space or hallway or doorway or anything like that.

It's just you open the door, boom, you're in the living room, where another couch could be basically. So anyways, they come in while I'm in the shower and at this point my heart is just racing. It's well over 75 beats per minute. And I'm just like, I turn off the water. I can't, I just can't imagine opening the door to someone's apartment and you see or hear that they're in the shower and you're like, oh yeah, let's just keep going. Like, wouldn't you just

Leave and try again 10 minutes. I don't know It doesn't make sense to me None of this feels very rational or legal So I turn off the shower I grab my towel. I'm like hey, can I help you? And they're like oh yeah, we're just seeing the apartment I was like you you really shouldn't come in here. I'm in the shower and like, hey, can I help you? And they're like, oh yeah, we're just seeing the apartment. I was like, you really shouldn't come in here. I'm in the shower and like, oh, just be quick. And they were. And I just felt so bad for the physical person who

is seeing the apartment, because they just look mortified. And I was like, yeah, I'm mortified too. You know, like this is pretty shitty. So that's pretty much all I got to say about it. I assume they came in on Monday as well. I don't know. I was at work, but I haven't gotten any texts from anyone, which doesn't really mean much about whether they wanted to see the apartment,

or come into the apartment this week, because they just come in regardless. But anyways, it's 12, 11 days. It's the actual date. We've had many moving shows already here on the podcast. We've had, gosh, we even did one where I wasn't even the one moving or farewell the far well when my old grad school roommates moved out of our Rouders Park apartment a four-bedroom

apartment 1620 west far well I think was the address or no 1520 no no no 1320 16 would be west of Ashton 1320 west far well apartment one. It was a four bed. They lived there from what, like, 20, 16 to 2018. And I think the rent was 1600 flat, or maybe 1700. It was a hell of a place. Nothing fancy, a lot of bugs, a lot of mice, but I think I paid, I paid basically 400 bucks a month

for that place when I was in grad school. And then of course, when I moved out of Baltimore, it's a classic experience, definitely tough, after a year, one of the show to pack up shop and leave, or I guess a year and a half of the show. And then of course, leaving Rodgers Park for me this time last year. I have officially abandon this apartment for over a year. I think I moved in last like, or no, maybe not.

I think I moved in like the 21st or 22nd. Either way, we'll be out of here very soon. I just had to take a break to blow my nose, sip on some more water here. But yeah, it's been a hell of a ride. I guess we'll save next week for a final send off to this hellhole of an apartment. But the newest thing, and this is just like, this is so terrible. Basically, I don't fully want to get into the whole geography of my apartment building here, but I'm on the ground floor.

Right behind me is the long wall of my apartment, and there's a big bay window looking out. Basically, it's the side. You walk along the side, get from the back concrete parking slab to most of the other apartments. And up until two weeks ago, actually, or maybe just last week, I'm not sure, there was no like gate or anything to go from the back up into just the general like apartment building area where there's like 12 units, something like that. There were gates in the front if you're walking from diversity back into the complex, but no gates in the back. So they installed a gate I guess my landlords people did

Last week and it's the worst thing ever and here's why every single time That the gate it's one of those you know opens, you know, has the spring so that it automatically closes. But, you know, people understandably just open it up, thing it wide open, walk through and then, you know, keep going along with your day as anyone should. When the gate closes, it makes a noise that you wouldn't, if you were to stand in outside and the gate closed, you wouldn't think twice about it's like a regular noise. But it has something to do with the fact that it's like, because the gate is like connected to my apartment, every single time it closes, which for some reason seems to be happening so much in the 6 a.m. hour lately.

I didn't know people in this, in these apartment units left the house at you know 6.30 a.m. So much I that's a hell of a commute. I feel bad for those guys anyways when it closes whether I'm in my bedroom Because my bedroom where my head rests on my pillow is literally Right on the other side of the wall of where that gate closes or even here in my living room, which is just about Where I'm sitting right now in the couch, maybe just 11, 12 feet down from there. It just rattles this whole apartment. It makes such a pain in the ass sound. And it's probably one of those things where if it was always here, I would have gotten used to it. But man, since it's so fresh, since it's so new, I am definitely

not used to it. And this just makes me, I was thinking about this. I wish there was like a better website or something or like way to leave a review for, for, for new tenants for people who are looking at your apartment, right? Don't you think this would be a great business idea? When someone comes in, they're touring my apartment. I'm sitting here on the couch. I wish I could send them the ESP through my mind waves or hand them a letter of being like,

hey, here are all the things that I love about this apartment. Good location. It stays cool, which in the summer is really nice and the winter is painting the ass for your heating bill. In unit laundry, here's all the things I hate about the apartment. This goddamn gate, the ant infestation, and no, they don't just come from outside, they come from behind the bathroom mirror as well. The smoke smell that I've been fighting for 12 months, the fact that it wasn't cleaned when I moved in. And I'll do my best to give it a clean before you move in, I promise. So you don't have to suffer the same fate. In yada, yada, yada, go through all the items.

Oh, people casually come into your apartment without knocking or ringing the doorbell. So, you know, I wish you could like, because there are some like apartment review websites out there. But as you can imagine, these are for, you know, the big, you know, big apartment buildings and, you know, like ownership groups and that sort of thing, it's not for the little guy, like my little 90-year-old Greek landlord.

So yeah, I just wish, because I feel so bad, the person is coming in. They're going to get sucker just like I did. Although I'll tell you what, this smoke smell will not be as egregious. You pretty much don't even notice anymore. I can't even begin. I should go back and listen to an old show

from when I moved in and see exactly what my reaction was like. It was so bad. And I've determined through some significant surarthricone and oil, what's his name? Sherlock Holmes detective work. Basically what happened, I figured this out over the last couple of months. The people who live in the apartment above me

used to live in this apartment. And I've learned that the apartment above me is the only two-bedroom apartment in this entire complex. Everything else is one-beds or studios. So I guess what happened is the person who used to live here moved upstairs when they got in your roommate. And oh, they're terrible too, not only the smoke stuff, but just like there, I don't know

if it's like Palestinian music or something, but it's just it blayers, man. And they got a dog that usually isn't too noisy, but sometimes can be, which is great. But basically, what I believe happened is that person is a huge smoker. They lived here, they moved up stairs, they continue their smoking. So when I came in here, I purified the shit out of this place, had my ozone generator,

all that stuff, which I still have. I really know what to do with it now, but I still have it. And so I've mostly like gotten the smoke out, but still around some of the events when you walk around, you can still smell it. So it's from them upstairs. And the reason I know this with like 100% certainty is because I've continued to get mail for someone, you know, my apartment number. It's not me. It's mostly a city of Chicago, like, fines and stuff from double parking and running red lights, all that stuff. So this guy sounds like a great character.

I've returned it to USPS saying, hey, it doesn't live here anymore. They continue to send it. I continue to send it back. It's been this way for a year. It's a pain in the ass. They really want their money, but they're not getting it from me. But I've also seen Amazon packages delivered

to the door next to me, which is the door that leads to the unit above mine. And that's the same name as the mail that's been delivered to my apartment, which is how I've come to this conclusion. So there you go, there's Quinn's Sherlock Holmes detective mystery solve of the week. I don't know if that segment is gonna catch on

as much as Quinn's medical minute or right on cue, I guess we'll find out. Anyways, so all of this is to say, I don't even remember how we got here. Oh, yeah, I wish I could tell perspective tenants You know this sort of thing because they're gonna come in here They're gonna be dealing with the Palestinian music the smoke smell coming from the vents the ant problem This god damn gate that closes

It's just they're gonna have fun with it. Oh, the moldy shower too. The shower was always moldy. And I've tried it variety different ways to kind of scrub it out and fix it. And I can't. So at this point, I've got 11 days left and I'm just saying, signing are a shower. That's been rough too, to never feel comfortable

in your shower. Man, they got it, they really ought to just tear this whole place out. We ended up spending 26, 27 minutes just talking about my apartment. And it worked out because I really came in with nothing. I'm really, I'm feeling okay to be honest. Like, I'm not like, oh my gosh, I'm super under the weather. Like, I got no energy. I can't speak. But it is tough to speak for this long of a time when you sort of throw. It's not a big deal now, but just like when you're congested, you can't breathe

through your nose properly. It makes speaking that much more challenging. So this was a semi-herculing effort on my part to get you a show this week. Cause I I'm going to go visit a friend this weekend and out of state should be a good time. But yeah, I mean, hey, if this was a live show in front of a live studio audience, we would have had to pull a Kimmel

and get some guest hosts on here. Jim and Kimmel, bless us all, test positive for COVID for the second time in three weeks. So he's back to guest hosts. Anyways, um, yeah, I mean, I, I'm not, I'm not ruling out the chance of a guest host. It's some point in the run of the bean town podcasts, especially if we go for another 60 years. But it's going to be because I like have throat surgery or something or get my tonsils out and I physically can't talk. I guess the next step would be to like

have Siri run the show. Just like have her write a script that's 30 minutes long and have her read it. I don't know how listable that would be, but hey with AI man and the future technology, anything's possible with the bean-town podcast. I want to thank everyone for listening. You can always email us Bean Town Podcast at Yahoo.com unless we get told you to go to our website Bean Town Podcast Yahoo.com which was embarrassing. Podcasts is Bean Town Podcast dot com or our email is Bean Town Podcast at Yahoo.com. You can find our show on Twitter at Bean Town Cast. You can find me personally on Twitter at White Buns with the Z or an Instagram at q.cleanD. on Twitter at beantowncast, you can find me personally on Twitter at white buns with a z

or an Instagram at q.qnd. I want to thank our sponsors Home Pride Oregon. We need to save certified home inspection done in Central Oregon. Call Steve, he's a guy you can trust and he's got a brand new car and it's going to blow you away, especially when he paints those flames on the side. 541-410-0316, to HomePrideOrgan.com. You can also thank our friends at the SAMHSA Q2U series. They give you crisp, clean audio quality

even when I'm feeling sick. Thank you, SAMHSA. When God speaks, He uses a SAMHSA. And of course, our good friends at Cuts by Q, when you need to fresh do something snappy and new, call the experts at Cuts by Q. I want to thank everyone for listening, for bearing with me,

and for, you know, just hearing about shitty apartment woes. I think we've all got our stories, and these are just some of mine. Okay, I've got 11 days left here. By the time you listen to this, I might already be out, who knows. Thanks everyone. Hope you're staying safe, staying sane, and we'll queue up our outro music so that I can check in on you next time. Bye everyone! I'm just going to sit there. nd nd