Bedros Keuilian Podcast Show - 055. The Mentality You Need To Win In Life (Winners Mindset)

Episode Date: October 17, 2023

In this episode, I’m sharing the DNA of a winner, how to know if you’re naturally a winner, and if you have what it takes to become a winner. So rather than spending years wondering if you have what it takes to win… I’ll show you how anyone can develop it by understanding this one thing. REGISTER FOR THE LEGACY TRIBE https://bedroskeuilian.com/legacytribe JOIN MY FREE 6-WEEK CHALLENGE https://bedroskeuilian.com/challenge TruLean Supplements | https://www.trulean.com/pages/bedros Get 50% Off Trulean Subscribe & Save Bundle Use Code: BEDROS Few Will Hunt Apparel | https://fewwillhunt.com/ Get 15% Off Your Entire Order Use Code: BEDROS

The winners that I know always feel they're behind, that they should have done more than they did that day, that they could have achieved more, they could have made more, they could have added more value. That is a mindset that you can develop. That is not some kind of innate trait that I have or other people have that you don't have. Welcome to the Bedroskulean show. Back when Q was rolling with Lorenzo and a Benzo, I was banging with a gang of instrumental. Hey, what's happening, friends. Welcome to the Bedrose Coolean show.

I'm Bedros Kulian and today we've got a great topic for you. The topic on hand is winning. And tell you guys what, I see a lot of people on social media talking about winning, what it takes to be successful, the mindset of a winner. But more often than not, I don't think they're hitting the nail on the head. So what I want to do today is I want to talk to you guys about what winning really looks like. Now, why do I think I'm qualified to talk about this? I've got a 20-year track record in building businesses across many different industries, supplement company, apparel, fitness franchise, software, brick and mortar gyms. And what's awesome is I've been able to build, scale, sell, and replicate that process again, again. And with that, I've been able to build

winning teams from leaders that are running departments to leaders that are running companies. and when you do that in a very competitive environment, such as the business landscape across many different industries, every single one of them competitive, you realize there's a certain DNA to win. And I want to share that with you. And I've also got the good fortune as a coach and consultant to many of the top experts out there

in terms of New York Times bestselling authors, professional athletes, top entrepreneurs. I've got access to some really high-performing people and I could see what the DNA of a winner is. So not only am I going to tap into my own personal experience, but I'm tapping into the experience that I've seen my coaching clients achieve at the highest level of whether they're in business

or sports or professional war fighters. And I want to share that with you because if you think that winning is a inherent trait that someone has, you're wrong. Believe it or not, winning is something that can be developed within everybody, right? And the reason I share this with you is because you're going to know at the end of this episode, one, if you are naturally a winner, and two, if you have what it takes to become one. Now, if you're not naturally a winner,

because I do believe some people are naturally born more competitive, naturally have leadership skills are naturally more focused and consistent. They are more driven. There are certainly inherent traits that people have that make them a higher, put them in a place to have higher success as winners, right? But that doesn't mean that we're all that way. I know I wasn't. I was born.

I think genetically I'm known to be lazy. I'm known to be, in fact, I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer. for that matter, it takes me a lot longer to get something. I'm always the 10-year overnight success, yet I've won in the category of entrepreneurship many a times, and I continue to win again facing massive competition and massive adversity. And I want to share that with you. But before we go on, guys, I want to let you know that if you're watching this on YouTube, over 72% of you are not subscribed.

And if I'm adding any value to your life with the Bedros Kulian show, if I'm helping you transcend and transform to your 2.0 self, if I'm helping you discover the higher version of yourself, if I'm giving you those aha moments and breakthroughs that are going to help you have more money, more meaning, more greater levels of self-mastery, please do me a favor to help us out and subscribe since more than 72% of you are not subscribed.

And if you'll hit that thumbs up button on this, if you're watching YouTube, it'll really help with that YouTube algorithm, allows to grow the message of really empowering men to grow and become the best versions of themselves, right? So with that said, let's talk about what winning looks like. So I guess I want to start it off with a story because I believe that stories really transfer a message well. Two stories I'm going to share with you, one of myself and one of Kobe Bryant. And I'll talk to you about the Kobe Bryant story first. I think, you know, even if you don't follow sports like me,

you know that Kobe Bryant was one of the goats of basketball. Like, you know, he was the greatest of all, one of the greatest of all times in basketball. And there's a video out there of Kobe Bryant. May he rest in peace. There's a video out there of him talking about, you know, he didn't have the best vertical. Like I think some of the better guys out there in the NBA

had like a 44, 46 inch vertical. He had like a 39, 40 inch vertical. He had big hands, but didn't have some of the biggest hands where he could easily palm the ball. he had certainly had height, but he didn't have the greatest amount of strength, which means he also didn't have a lot of stamina in his legs. And so he had a lot of shortcomings. In other words, he didn't have a lot of talent as a ball player. What he did have is what we're going to share with you and what it takes to be a winner. And see, oftentimes the people in your life want to really look down on you

when you decide that to flip the switch and become a winner in life. And it doesn't matter if it's in business, if it's in sports, if it's in a relationship, the people in your life start getting afraid. They have this fear of loss, that they're going to lose the version of you that they know that they're comfortable with. However, that version of you that they know and they're comfortable with is average. And we all know that average is the enemy. And if you want to transcend to the higher level of,

version, again, in business, in life, in sports. It doesn't really matter. Hell, those professional warfighters, right? I've had a good fortune to coach and consult, you know, Navy SEALs and Army Rangers and Marine Raiders who have come out from the military, from special operations, and have become entrepreneurs. Every single one of these guys have elevated to the tier one category of their units, right? And every single one of these guys, when I talked to them, weren't like specially talented in all the different areas that you needed to be talented in to be a professional warfighter. But they did what we're about to talk about here. So what did Kobe Bryant do? Well, Kobe Bryant decided that he's going to spend more time

in the gym strengthening his legs because he realized that playing as many games as he needed to play in the NBA required him to be stronger, have more muscle capacity, have more speed and stamina over a longer period of time and not just over a longer period of time as in one game, but over a longer period of time as in one season because they play so many games in his season. He also realized that because his hands weren't as big as all the other ballplayers, that he need to develop the muscles in his hands so that he could palm a ball the way he needed to to be able to shoot it and dunk it.

He also realized because he didn't have the natural ability to jump 44, 45, 46 inches. He was averaging it around 40 inches and that's a big deal. That's not that impressive for the NBA, apparently. He started working on those skills, all while also working on all the other skills he needed to do, running, passing, block. shooting, right, setting up picks and all these other things that he needed to do to become a great ball player. So what did he do? He took his passion and he made it his obsession and that's the thing you have to understand about winners. The moment you are passionate about something, everybody wants to support you.

Everyone's got your back. They're like, yeah, man, go follow your passion. I believe in you. You can do this because when someone is passionate about something, it's not threatening. They still spend time with you. They're still the somewhat the old version of themselves. But the moment you get obsessed about something, you are a very different motherfucker. The moment you are obsessed about something, everyone else in your life dies. That's just a reality, right? And so I'm going to give you an example of some winning mindsets in just a moment. But that example of Kobe Bryant where he wasn't the best runner, he wasn't the best jumper,

he didn't have the most stamina, his hands weren't big enough to naturally palm the ball, so he had to build the strength. He did that by spending extra time in the gym. There's a video of him out there on YouTube talking about how he just woke up earlier. He'd be at the gym. In fact, Tim Grover, a dear friend of mine who wrote the book, Relentless, his first book, Relentless,

his second book winning. He was the personal trainer for Michael Jordan, Charles Barkley, Kobe Bryant, and many other top athletes. And he talks about how Kobe would show up at 4 a.m. to the gym. And he'd call, he'd call Tim and he would say, hey, man, can you open up the gym? I'm here early.

I want to get a workout in because he would get two or three workouts in a day. He would work out super early. Do everything he needed to. Go home, eat, sleep, recover, come back again in the afternoon. Repeat the process. Workout, train, get his reps in, both in the gym. And on the court, go back. sleep, recover, come back again in the evening, repeat the cycle one more time because he knew

he needed to time collapse to be able to bring out the greatness. That is a high level of obsession that is required. Do you think that Kobe Bryant made time for old friends when he's training three days a week and then focused on recovery when he's not training, not sorry, said three days a week? I should have said training three times a day, right? And that's what we tend to forget is when you're passionate about something, people are supportive of you. They believe in you. They want to see you win because you're still the same version of yourself. But the moment you get obsessed about something, they are threatened by you because there's a new version of you. They see the fire in your eyes. They see the chip on your shoulder. They see that this is a man

who's locked on to his goals. And that man is very threatening to them. Because when you're obsessed, when you're determined, you're a very different version of yourself. In fact, In the process of building fit body boot camp, my dear friend Chanta, who I've talked about here many of times, I've known him for 25 years now. We started off working at Disneyland back when we were 19, 20 years old. We were working at Disneyland together as Buzz Boys. When I started building Fit Body Boot Camp years later after I quit Disneyland, there was an eight-year period where Chantan and I didn't speak. Not because we had a fallout, not because of any other reason other than I had to obsess on building this giant fitness franchise because I committed to being debt free and self-funded.

I chose not to raise money. I chose not to take on debt, which meant I had to max out credit cards. I had to pull money out of my home. I had to empty bank accounts. And that meant that I had to obsess because it was a do-or-die moment for me. Now, I'm not asking you to go do that on your obsession. That's up to you. what I am telling you though is for eight years one of my closest friends and I we just didn't speak

we didn't hang out we may have sent some text messages or a call here and there to each other but that was the extent of it I made no time to hang out with any friends and the one friend that I didn't lose Chanta was totally okay with it all my other friends I lost because when you go on that mission to upgrade yourself to become the 2.0 version of yourself, to become the next highest version of the man that you're meant to be, that is threatening, that is scary to the people around you. For two reasons. One, they don't know this version of you anymore. They can't relate to you. Number two, they see their shortcomings. They know that they should be transcending to the 2.0 version. And they are threatened by you

because they know that they ought to be leveling up. They ought to be trying harder. They ought to be doing more. But they're not. They choose to still work their 9 to 5s. They choose to still stay fat. They choose to still stay broke. They choose to still stay emotional.

They choose to wear another man's name on their jersey on the weekends, to wear it on their back and root for a sports team that they don't own, that they don't have equity in, that they don't get profits from? Because that is the average man's journey in life, right? And remember, the average man inspires no one. Listen, I stopped taking all of those, and I started taking this, the Trulian Wellness Shot. In fact, I created this because I was sick and tired of every morning taking 11 different supplements like turmeric, ginger, cayenne pepper, black pepper, vitamin B12, echinacea, vitamin C, zinc, right?

Think about this. If you want to improve your immune system, if you want to fight off inflammation in your body so that you have better gut health, you have more energy, your joints don't hurt, then you're going to want to take all those supplements. And I was taking it twice a day every day. And so when we created the truly wellness shot, we cut no corners and we spared no expense. And so in this, you've got something that's going to not only help boost your immune system, but also fight off inflammation. Because if you're a high performer and if you want to get more done, if you want to stay more focused, if you want to stay more focused, if you want to want to make sure that you don't get sick as frequently, then you have to care about your immune system and you have to fight off inflammation, especially if you're an entrepreneur and you're high performing and you have a stressful workday from time to time, right? And so here's what I want you to do. You're going to click on the link in the description box or go to truleen.com and you're going to use the code word bedros. And when you use my name, Bedros, you'll get 50% off your first subscribe and save bundle. For whatever reason, you don't like to truly. a wellness shot, which I have yet to meet anyone who doesn't, then let us know in your first 30

days will give you full refund, part ways as friends. Fair enough, go check it out. Use the code word bed rose, get 50% off. Peace. But the obsessed man, he's dangerous. He's a weapon. And people are threatened by him. And so what do you need to know? You need to know this. That if you're the type of person who wants to win in life, odds are you're not doing enough. Like the best, the winners that I know in the world do more than they ever thought they needed to do. In other words, they bring a nuclear bomb to a gunfight when in reality, average people, they expect to have a winner's outcome, but they bring a water pistol to a gunfight.

Do you understand the difference? I would rather bring a nuclear bomb to a gunfight than a water pistol to a gunfight. So you're not doing enough. Like the winners that I know always feel that they're behind. The winners that I know always feel like they should have done more at the end of the day. Even though they worked harder than everyone else around them, the winners that I know always feel they're behind, that they should have done more than they did that day, that they could have achieved more. They could have added more value. Right.

And that's, that is a mindset that you can develop. That is not some kind of innate trait that I have or other people have that you don't have. You can develop that by setting higher standards for yourself. The problem is that your mom and dad and school teachers and everybody around you has conditioned you and indoctrinated you in becoming average and accepting average and just doing what the Joneses do, what the neighbors do to keep up with the Joneses. So they have two cars, you have two cars. They have a little shit box of a house.

You have a shit box of a house. They're always in debt and they're two paychecks away from going broke. So you're always in debt, two paychecks away from going broke. That's the extent of it. Like that is what you're encouraged to do by mom and dad and grandparents, aunts, uncle, school teachers. They don't want you to change. They don't want you to transcend. They don't want you to become the best version of yourself.

Because if you do, that is threatening to them. That is scary to them. So what else do you need to know? Well, you could either do the work today to become your highest version tomorrow or tomorrow you can feel a lifelong of regret. That's a given. The people who know that they were meant for more and didn't go for more end up with a lifelong state of regret.

And the reason for that is, is because they didn't want to hurt the people around them. Didn't want to hurt family members. They didn't want to feel like they're missing out on birthdays and weddings and funerals. But instead, they gave in to the life of average just so they can blend in and not stand out. And years later, they regret not doing the things that they could have done to become a winner. Make no mistake about it, guys. There's a price to pay to be a winner.

There's an absolute price to pay to be a winner. Let me talk to you about that. I told you I'd share some stories about me. As I'm filming this right now, tomorrow is my mother's funeral. In here in the studio, I'm filming three episodes. Do you think that today I want to be in here filming three episodes knowing that tomorrow morning is my mother's funeral? Now, I know what you're thinking.

Damn, B, why don't you take the day off? Why don't you clear your head? why don't you mourn your mom's loss? Why don't you grief? How's that going to help? I've done the grieving. I've done the crying for the last week and a half. I've mourned.

My mom's not coming back. I have a duty and an obligation. I have a calling. I meant for more. I'm a walking, talking example to my son and daughter, Andrew and Chloe, of doing the work even when you don't feel. like it, even when circumstances are not in your favor, even when your mom dies.

And so you have to be willing to have that mindset that you can compartmentalize what is happening in your life so that you can do what a winner needs to do to win in life or in your fitness, or in your business, or in your sport. See, this is something that's not taught. It's not encouraged. And in fact, it's not looked down upon. You might even leave a comment if you're watching. this on YouTube and go, damn, man, that's cutthroat, that's ruthless. Is it? Is it? Or is life for the

living? Life is for the living. My mom is dead. Tomorrow is her funeral. I loved that woman. She was my best friend when we came to this country. As a little kid, a six-year-old, I had no one else to hang out with. It was just my mom. Well, my dad and my older brother and older sister worked. But I saw her through her dementia over the last seven years. I was by her bedside when she died a week and a half ago. Tomorrow's her funeral and today I'm here. This is what it takes. It's easy to want to text Joan, my assistant, and say, you know what?

Cancel the shoot. We're not filming today. It's easy to say, guys, we're just going to do one episode because one episode is what we need to carry us into the next week. We're not going to batch process like we normally do. We're not going to do three episodes like we normally do. That's easy. And average people, losers choose easy. The winners will do what needs to get done to produce the outcome that is required of them,

no matter the scenario at hand. I'll give you another example. Ten years ago, ten years ago, I tore my right bicept. I was working out in the gym and then I was climbing the rope. You climb the rope, you ring the bell, you slide back down, right? as I was climbing back down, my right bicep popped and it tore and like a Venetian blind, it just rolled right up into my shoulder. As I fell down, I rolled up my sleeve and I realized, holy crap, I've torn my bicep.

Guess what? I had a whole family trip planned the following week. I'm talking about my brother's family, sister's family, my family, my mom and dad, twice a year I would take them on a nice, lavish vacation. And this vacation was going to be in Lake Tahoe. I rented a massive mansion, and we were going to have a good time. But I tore my bicep. It would be wise of the average person to go, well, something limiting happened that was

unplanned, and therefore I have to cancel the trip. Instead, I went and got the surgery two days later, had my bicep reattached with my arm in the sling the next day, flew with my family to Lake Tahoe. Got the rental car, drove up the mountain, went to the Costco, got all the food we needed for the big families to come the next day, loaded up the mansion with food. And when the families came, they saw me in a cast and they're like, holy shit, what happened? Like nothing. Tore my bicep a couple days ago. Got the surgery yesterday and here I am today. In fact, that very next day when my family came, my two, older nephews,

Armin and Michael, three of us went and worked out. Two days after my bicep surgery, I'm in the gym working out with them because we had planned on it. Nothing changes in the winner's mind. Do you understand that? You have to be obsessed.

You have to be mission focused. You have to be driven by something greater than what average people are driven by, which is eating ho-hoes, ding-dongs, and Cheetos. Average people want to watch TV and drink fucking Kool-Lade

in soda pop. They want to gossip over bullshit stuff standing by the, by the water fountain at work. They want to watch the news and handring about all the shit that they can't control while they don't make any effort about controlling all the controllables in their life. That is what average people do. But winners go far beyond that. They go far beyond that. They want to prove people wrong. My family was like, why did you not call us? We could have canceled the trip. We could have rescheduled it. Why? Why would I do that? That is accepting mediocrity. That is accepting a very different life.

And today, when I look back, could you imagine if I had canceled that trip? Remember, I said this was 10 years ago when I tore my biceps. Seven years ago, we found out my mom has dementia, Alzheimer's. She started losing her memory. That Tahoe trip is a memory that I have, an experience that I have with my mom, that I'll never forget. Such a great time when her memory was still intact. She was laughing. She was having a good time telling stories.

of the old country. And imagine if because of a torn bicep and a surgery that I had the day before, I took the little bitch way out, I would have missed out on that awesome experience with my mom. And so I'm here to tell you that you must obsess and you cannot give two fucks about the people in your life who don't understand why you're obsessed, why you're not going to weddings, why you're not going to birthday parties, why you're not available on weekends at the bar to hang out on the couch to watch TV like you on the fucking team when they don't. Rooting for another fucking man instead of rooting for yourself. And I got to tell you something else about winners, man.

Winners have a special DNA. And that DNA is we just feel like we're always behind. We're always behind. We're always behind. And I put up a post on social media about that today. I said 80% of the time you feel like you're failing. 15% of the time you feel like you're just treading water. 4% of the time, you feel like you're just treading water.

4% of the time you feel like it's over. This is it. The ship's going down. And then 1% of the time you feel like winning. That is the winner's life. Like I constantly feel like I'm failing. I'm not doing things right. I'm not doing enough.

And then, you know, that's 80%. 15% of the time I feel like I'm fucking trading water. 4% of the time I feel like this is it. It's going down. It's over. Now 1% of the time I feel like I'm actually winning. And you know what a winner does? He just takes that 1% and stacks them on top.

of each other, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year. And that is how you build an empire. That is how you build a legacy. That is how you build a brand. That is how you build millions in money or help millions of people through impact or serve your family at the highest level because you have the means to do it. Every family deserves to have a winner. I think it should be you.

But you also have to disconnect. Unplug your ambilical cord from the belly button of average. And plug yourself into the mindset of a winner, which is a winner does more than expected every single time, no matter how they feel, no matter the circumstances. A winner shows up 10x times more than the average person. A winner has these unreasonable expectations of himself. A winner knows that he's destined for greatness.

And no matter how many people around him tell him to slow down, be careful, watch out, that's too risky. You don't have the genetics, the DNA, the money, the mind, the brain power for that. A winner locks onto their fucking goals and keeps going. That's what the winner does. And throughout that process of going, whether you're building a business or building a family, you're building your body, or whatever it is that you're doing. I'm telling you right now, man, as a winner, 80% of the time you're going to feel like you're failing. 15% of the time, you're going to feel like you're just treading water.

You just got your nose above the water line. 4% of the time you feel like it's fucking over. This is it. I'm about to tap out. But you don't because that 1% of the time, my friend, that 1% of the time is when you know you're winning. And you go, I'm going to take these 1%. I'm going to stack them and stack them and stack them. And you know what happens when you stack winning over a year?

years and decades, you become a fucking formidable force to be reckoned with. And that's what I want for you. I want you to be a formidable force to be reckoned with. But that means going from average to figuring out what you want to do as a passion and then bypassing your passion and making it your obsession, where everybody around you thinks you're crazy. But then when you meet people like me and all the other people that I hang out with, you're going to go, holy fuck, I'm wired just like them.

We're not so crazy after all. They're the crazy ones. They're the losers. They're average. They're in debt. They're broke. They have a negative mindset. They are emotionally irrational, absolutely mentally distressed.

One paycheck, two paychecks away from being broke. A horrible example of what a man should be. A horrible example of a husband, of a father, of a leader. That's what average people are. That's what the average man is. a walking cautionary tale, but a winner, a winner is obsessed on his goals and he'll do whatever it takes no matter the circumstances. Guys, do me a favor.

If you are watching this on YouTube, please subscribe, give us a thumbs up so that the algorithms work in our favor. Like I said, 72% of you on YouTube are not subscribed and you're watching this and I appreciate that and I value that. Those of you on Spotify and iTunes, thank you so much for listening. and I guess on Spotify watching this show as well. Guys, we are now on year two of the BK show. We have officially kicked off year two of the Bedros-Colian show,

and it's because of you that this show continues on. So thank you so much for the support for sharing this content. And above all, remember this, that average is the enemy, that success is your responsibility, and change can take place in an instant when you decide to flip the switch. I'll see you guys next time. difference between me and you back when cue was rolling with Lorenzo and a Benzo I was banging with a gang of instrumental