Bedros Keuilian Podcast Show - 087. HOW TO BUILD UNSHAKABLE CONFIDENCE

Episode Date: May 28, 2024

Having a traumatic childhood can easily set you up for mediocrity IF YOU LET IT. That's why in this episode of the Bedros Keuilian Show, I share how to fix your life, get your shit together, and build confidence that is unshakeable. REGISTER FOR THE LEGACY TRIBE Get the Life, Money, Meaning & Impact You Deserve https://bedroskeuilian.com/legacytribe SUBSCRIBE TO DOMINATION DOWNLOAD A Weekly Newsletter to Help You Dominate in Business & Life https://bedroskeuilian.com/ JOIN MY FREE 6-WEEK CHALLENGE: Transform into a Purpose-Driven Man https://bedroskeuilian.com/challenge TruLean Supplements | https://www.trulean.com/pages/bedros Get 50% Off Trulean Subscribe & Save Bundle Use Code: BEDROS Few Will Hunt Apparel | https://fewwillhunt.com/ Get 20% Off Your Entire Order Use Code: BEDROS BECOME A MODERN DAY KNIGHT: Join the MDK Project https://www.themdkproject.com/ PODCAST EPISODES: https://bedroskeuilian.com/podcast/ STAY CONNECTED: Website | https://bedroskeuilian.com/ Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/bedroskeuilian/ LinkedIn | https://www.linkedin.com/in/bedroskeuilian Twitter | https://twitter.com/bedroskeuilian

They don't want you to have that level of confidence. And if you do, then you start questioning them, and that is how we create change. So if we want to change the world, change starts with self. Welcome to the Bedroft's Koolian show. Back when Q was rolling with Lorenzo and a Benzo, I was banging with a gang of instrumental. Listen, I feel like I've lived two lives, the life of mediocrity and now the life of awesomeness. And I want to teach you how you can live a life of awesomeness as well. Guys and gals, welcome to the Bedros Koolian show. I'm Bedros Kulian. And today we're going to talk about how you can fix your life and get over your shit. Because if you are in a place in life right now where you're like, man, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired of constantly losing in life. I'm sick and tired of starting things and then not finishing them. I'm sick and tired of making a promise to myself and then not following through on that promise or even worse, making a promise to others like your kids, your family, and then not following through. Each time you do.

that, you end up eroding your reputation, not only with the people around you, but you end up eroding your reputation with yourself. That is the fastest way, by the way, to lose confidence. And guess what? The system, the opposition, the man is already working to erode your confidence because the system hates you. The opposition hates you. They don't want dudes who are courageous and confident and capable and sovereign because you would be a threat to them. And so they are already doing things to erode masculinity and to help really tweak the identity of men, right? They want men separated. They don't want you to have skill sets.

They don't want you to have confidence. They want you to be isolated. They want to see you on your mama's couch in the basement playing video games, rubbing one out to an only fan's account, and then Cheeto dust all up in your belly button with floppy little tittys that are gelatinous. That's how the man wants you. That's how Biden wants you. So what do we do to counteract that?

Well, you have to be a willing participant in your fucking life. You have to be a willing participant in saving yourself, right? That's why I said how to fix your life and get your shit together. Look, if you can't get your shit together, do you think the man is going to gallop in on a horse and save you? He's not. There is no man on a white horse that's going to gallop in and save your ass. Like, you are it, bro.

You are it. So I'm telling you right now, if you are not willing, to be a willing participant in the saving of your own career, confidence, life, then what are we doing here, right? So let's dive in and talk about this. Like I already said, the opposition does not want to see you win. There's a reason for that. Each time you become more confident, capable, sovereign, you begin to question, where's our money going? Right?

Why are we sending all this money to Ukraine? And why is it that all this money never makes it to the front lines in Ukraine? They don't want people questioning that. They just want you to be a good fat robot, be in debt and keep paying your taxes so that they can send money to Ukraine and majority of it can be laundered back into the pockets. By the way, of both the left and the right, the Republicans and the Democrats, don't for a moment think that I'm in this like, hey, Democrats are bad and Republicans are awesome. I think there's corruption across the entire fucking thing.

And I think that the only person we can trust is self, right? Self and then a tight circle of like dudes that that share our core values that we can relate to and we can get together and make money with and develop like this fucking community that is impenetrable. So if you are smart, sovereign, confident, you know, a free thinker, well, guess what? You're going to question authority every single time, right? Oh, okay, I should take that. I should take that shot again because the first 12 shots didn't help me.

Then fine, I'll take the 13th shot. You're sending money to Ukraine. Go for it. I'll just work harder and pay more taxes. Oh, the border in Texas is open. And not only do we have illegal immigrants coming in, but we also have potential terrorists that we keep finding that are on the most wanted list. Oh, I want to ask questions.

they don't want you to have that level of confidence. And if you do, then you start questioning them, and that is how we create change. So if we want to change the world, change starts with self, right? And that is what I want to talk to you about today, because they want you dumb, they want you fat, they want you sick, they want you broke. They want you to be in debt. And they, of course, want you to just pay your taxes and not ask questions. We, on the other hand, we're like, hey, you know what, I think I want sovereignty.

I think I want to be confident. I want to be strong. I want to be capable. I want to be courageous. I want to find a chick that, like, shares my core values and loves me and puts me up on a pedestal. And, you know, I put her up on a pedestal. And, you know, we have this awesome life and family together. We make amazing babies and we teach these babies how to be fit and healthy and confident

and take control of their own economy so that they don't have to look at daddy government. Like, that is the kind of man you want to become, right? Well, if that's the kind of man you want to become, it starts with what? Dealing with your shit. Now, you probably know, and I've talked about this before, but if you're brand new to the Bedros-Coolion show, let me catch you up. I'm an immigrant to this country. I'm a foreigner, right?

I come from Armenia. Armenia at the time when I lived there was under Soviet rule. So I come from a communist country. My dad, in fact, was a member of the Communist Party. And what many of you don't know is not only did we escape the Soviet Union when I was six years old in 1980. So that makes me 49 years old now, right? I was six years old in 1980 and we escaped and we came to the United States. And we came as political refugees because my dad did not want to be a part of the Communist Party.

And in fact, he wanted everything that America at the time had to offer freedom, opportunity, the Constitution and its totality. and not how it's being eroded and taken apart now, right? And so he was willing to risk his life to bring his family here. But what many of you don't know is that while I lived in Armenia, between the ages of four and six, I was constantly molested by two older boys. I had to deal with sexual abuse. So the fact that we escaped Armenia and came to the United States

also freed me from constant sexual abuse. But then we come here to the United States. We don't speak the language. We don't understand the culture. We're broke. We're living in Section 8 housing. And all types of gangs are beating us up because you're not going to find, you know, white collar Maggie and Mr.

fucking Smith living in a Section 8 housing complex in the ghettos. And so we were surrounded by people who were broke like us and thugs and gangbangers. And when you have a funny haircut like I did when I was a kid and your mom soes your clothes. and finds clothes that don't even fit you because she found them at like a at a thrift store. Well, guess what? You wear funny clothes. They have a funny haircut. You have a funny accent.

You barely speak the language. And you start getting made fun of and you get beat up. So you can imagine how much trauma I had to deal with, not only sexual abuse, but also getting here and getting physically abused and picked on and bullied. And then getting kicked out from one school after another. I went to three elementary schools, two junior highs and two high schools. I didn't have a lot of friends. And so how in the world am I going to grow up and be a confident, capable, courageous man when I grew up scared and with low self-esteem, no self-worth, feeling like I'm unlovable, I'm broken, I'm shameful?

How many of you are walking around right now in this moment and you haven't dealt with any of your traumas? You haven't done any healing? and you're like, yeah, man, one day I want to be rich. One day I want to be fit. One day I want to be a better dad. I want to be a better husband. Well, when does that one day happen? It happens when you start healing, right?

Like the greatest work you can do is the work of self-mastery. That's why the show, the core pillar of the show is money, meaning, and self-mastery. Because if a man is able to create his own economy, generate your own money, instead of just looking for the man for payment. and the man could be a company that you work for, and they keep passing up on a promotion for you. Or the cost of living raise that they're giving you is not even at a par with the cost of inflation.

So even though you got a 3% raise, inflation being 7, 8, 9, 10%, you actually are still making less money even though you got a shitty little raise, right? Or you're not being respected at work, or you're being looked over for an opportunity. Like, when will you decide to take that idea that you have and create a side project on Friday nights, Saturdays, and Sundays, right?

Like make time. Start carving out time in your life. The times when you are like parting with the homies, when you are drinking and binge eating nachos and watching your sports team, your favorite sports team, my team playing football, basketball, baseball, fucking hockey ball, where the fuck it is? It's not your team. Like you go around knowing the stats. I've talked to you about this before.

You know the stats of every fucking player on your favorite sports team as though you own the goddamn team. You don't. Yet you won't make time to start that side business. You won't make time to start healing and reading books on how to heal through your pain or trauma, the adversities you faced, right? You don't know how to forgive and forget. You don't know how to move on from that pain. And so what do you do? You isolate yourself and you escape using alcohol, drugs, vape pens, fucking food.

Food is a source of escape. How much shitty food do you eat to create that dopamine spike so that you can avoid the realities of your life? Television is an escape, video games, social media. There's so many escapes that you are using because you are doing everything you can to ignore your conscience. And you're like, dude, but how am I going to start working on myself? How am I going to start working on that side business that you want me to start when I'm

always anxious and depressed? motherfucker, do you know why you're anxious and depressed? Hey guys, quick interruption to the Bedrose Cooleyan show. I want to tell you about the newly reformulated truly wellness shot. Now, I wanted to create a supplement that was zero compromise that would boost your immune system, fight off inflammation in your gut, joint, and body so that you can keep getting after your goals and dreams in life. And now the new reformulated truly wellness shot is boosted with electrolytes to help keep you hydrated as well.

Truly wellness shots are packed with these amazing ingredients, vitamin C, vitamin D, B12, zinc, turmeric, echinacea, ginger, estrugulus, and now with electrolytes to help keep you hydrated. And if you're anything like me, then you're going to want to get these truly wellness shots because you want to stay healthy, hydrated, and inflammation free so that you can keep chasing your goals and dreams and light. Now, just like the godfather, Don Corleone, I'm going to make you an offer that you can't refuse. When you go to truleen.com and use my name bedroes during checkout and you join the Trulene tribe subscription. Club, you will not only get 50% off your 30-day supply, but you'll also get free shipping.

And it comes with a 30-day unconditional money-back guarantee. So for any reason, you don't like the Truling Wellness Shots, and we have yet to meet anyone who doesn't like these awesome products, then just let us know and we'll give you a full refund and part ways as friend. Go to truene.com, check out the wellness shot. Use my name, Bedros, and get 50% off when you join the Truling Tribe. You get free shipping, 30-day money-back guarantee, and I promise you you're going to love this product and you're going to tell all your friends about it. Now back to the show. Let me unveil this

for you. The reason you're anxious and depressed more often than not is because your conscience is trying to tell you through the feeling of anxiety and depression that you are not living congruently to the man that you want to be. The fit man, the confident man, the courageous and capable man, the husband, the father that you want to be, the entrepreneur that you want to be, And when you are living incongruently, the only way your conscience, your higher self is going to be able to get your attention and be like, bro, get your shit together. It's time to stop fucking around. It's time to fix yourself and get your shit together. The only way that happens is through like your body is like, hey, how about this anxiety?

How about a little depression? How about some overwhelm? Why don't you stay in bed longer? If you actually got up and just started working out, eating right. sending out gratitude text messages, right? One of the easiest things I do to give myself a checkup from the neck up, every morning I send out three gratitude text messages to three random people in my life that I'm grateful for. People that have done a solid for me, people that have mentored me, people that have looked out for me,

people that have given me guidance, people that have shown me the way. And when I send out a gratitude text message of, hey, thank you, Bob, thank you Jim Franco, thank you, Mary. that puts me in a state of gratitude. I remind myself that there are people in my life who have helped me, who want to support me. And guess what? Sometime throughout the day,

all three of those people text back and they go, man, you're such a good person. Thank you for that text message you sent. I needed to hear that. And then you realize like, holy fuck, man, I did good for others.

I actually served others. And surprise, surprise, motherfucker, guess what? One of the greatest things you can do in the process of healing is not only work with a therapist, get fit and start eating right and start reading books on on healing through your pain like you want a

great book to read there's a great book called do the work i forget the author's name if those of you on youtube uh do the work i forget the author's name so just on youtube write the name in the comment section of do the work uh the author's name and maybe i'll want to drop the link to amazon for do the work also another great book if you want to start healing how about the body keeps the score by dr van Beasel or some shit, right? The body keeps the score. Like literally, the title should scare you. The body keeps the score. Yeah, because if you've dealt with physical, emotional, mental, sexual trauma, it shows up in your body by way of anxiety, depression, overwhelm, addiction, dependency, obesity, laziness, constant fatigue. Your body, headaches, gut issues. Your body will keep the score

of the physical, mental, and emotional traumas that you've experienced until you process and heal through it, man. I'm telling you this because I'm 49 now. At the age of 38, I finally decided to work with the therapist and to get over my shit. And if you ever read my book, Man Up, you know the whole story. I had a massive panic attack 11 years ago. I thought I was having a heart attack. And that panic attack led me to the doctor, which led me to a therapist, a psychologist,

and Dr. Kevin Downing in Brea, California, worked with me for over a year every week to help me process through the sexual abuse, that physical abuse, the self-worth issues, the self-sabotaging behaviors. And all of a sudden, guess what? More confidence.

I'm able to keep my promises. I become even leaner, more athletic. Why? Because I don't hate myself anymore. Subconsciously, you hate yourself. If you want to know the truth, like why your life sucks right now and you're like my life sucks how do i fix my life is because you hate yourself like why are people that have the same amount of time as you do they're at the same

age you have the same level of education why are they doing so much better than you odds are they have a higher level of love and respect for themselves and if you love and respect yourself you take better care of yourself right i mean if you're a dad you know this if you love and respect your kids you take better care of them but if you're a shipbag dad you probably don't Love and respect your kids. And so your kids are constantly a menace to humanity. That's just how it works. All right.

So in addition to those three books that I've already referred to you, right? The Body Keeps the Score, How to Do the Work, My Book, Man Up. I also want you to read Outwitting the Devil by Napoleon Hill. Like this book will change and transform your life because you're like, holy crap, I see how things like alcohol, pornography, food, television, big media. is impacting the way I think and process and feel about the world. And that's a pretty scary thing. And before you know it, you're living in what the state that he calls, Napoleon Hill calls,

drifting through life, as in you have no definitive purpose. And if you've got no definitive purpose in life and you have no sense of meaning, which is purpose in life, why are you going to get out of bed? So as you can see, it makes sense that this entire podcast focuses on money, meaning and self-mastery, because if you can focus on self-mastery and start healing through your shit, you then become the kind of person that can serve humanity, which then, once you've healed and worked through your shit, you're a better father, you're a better husband, you're a better friend, you're a better entrepreneur, you're healthy, you like look in the mirror and you're like,

man, I'm fucking jacked and I love myself and I love this fucking body that I have and I love the capacity in which this body can move and work and lift and run and sprint. Like, holy fuck, guys, I'm turning 50 years old this. summer and like I'm on the mats doing jujitsu I'm one-wheeling I'm surfing I'm lifting I get to do so many fucking cool things because I finally have fallen in love with myself and over the last 11 years I have done more self work in healing than I've ever done before so I know it's scary but you got to address the shit that is literally dimming your inner light your radiance right If you're wondering where we're going with all this,

like when you start healing through your traumas, physical, mental, sexual abuse, whatever it showed up, maybe your parents did you wrong. Like, fuck my parents. My parents did me wrong. Okay. Motherfucker, you're an adult now.

Now what? Are you going to move on or you're going to keep blaming your parents? Or that bitch cheated on me and I had to divorce her. And she took half the month, okay. So you're going to be broke the next 30 years that you have ahead of you, 40 years? Come on, man. While this person dumped me, okay.

I got fired. Okay, fine. Now what? You're going to be fucking living on your mom's couch in the basement? Like at some point you have to take the locus of control and bring it internal and say, I control everything in my life, right? Absolutely. There's external fucking issues that happen. Like, I didn't ask to be molested.

I didn't ask to get bullied. I didn't ask for those things. Those things happened to me. Right? Those were absolutely external things. But if I continue to hold on to the trauma and the, the pain and the limiting beliefs that those things have created in my life. How is that serving me and my family?

How's that serving me and the show? How's it serving my company and my employees? It's not. How's it helping my customers and clients worldwide? It's not. And therefore, I would start suffering with anxiety and depression and overwhelmed because I'm not living a meaningful,

purpose-driven life. So self-mastery leads to finding and developing your meaning and purpose, which leads to money, motherfucker, money. And when you have money, you have options. Money solves the problem of not having money, and that's a damn good problem to solve and you know it, right? So listen, I know I've been talking to like men mostly on this particular episode,

but ladies, this applies to you as well. Turns out we're all human. And if we're all human, then we all have the same problem. We've got to heal through our traumas, get past our shit, learn to forgive the people that did you wrong, like your parents or siblings, school teachers who might have just given you bad advice and guidance, who said that you're stupid, you're dumb, you're retarded, you're incapable, you're not tall enough, pretty enough, smart enough. Okay, got it. Prove them wrong. Let's success be your best revenge, bro.

Like, how long are you going to hold on to that shit? And the moment you can start building a brotherhood or a sisterhood, the moment you start getting lean and jacked and taking care of your body, you start making money, you start keeping the promises to yourself and no longer being a promise breaker. because the biggest thing with breaking promises to yourself is that you begin to erode your reputation with yourself. Your reputation with yourself is confidence. And a person that's constantly eroding the reputation with themselves is literally tearing down their own confidence.

And if you keep tearing down your own confidence, guess what happens next? You start seeing yourself as a fucking loser. You start seeing yourself as an inferior person. You begin to do what Napoleon Hill talks in his book, outwitting the devil. You begin to drift through life. looking for things to escape, right? Looking for drugs, alcohol, weed,

vape pen, food, television, social media, only fans. What are the fuck it is that you're going to do to escape? But the reality is you can't escape from it because at night, right before you go to bed, before you close your eyes, before you doze off to sleep, your conscience talks to you and goes, pst, motherfucker,

you live the life of incongruency again. There's no respect for, a man who lives a life of incongruency. That man is a hypocrite, right? A man who cannot live a congruent life to what he visualizes in his head. He's a hypocrite. And so then you go to bed, what, feeling anxious and depressed. Surprise, surprise, motherfucker, you wake up anxious and depressed because of that. And here's what I can tell you about the type of men that I respect, the type of women that I respect. Those that have healed through their shit, those that serve others, those that treat their body like a temple, those that keep their promises

to not only themselves but others. I respect the type of person who makes money and does a lot of good with it. I respect the type of person who's not a liability to their family, to their community, but instead they're an asset. I respect the type of person who's driven by purpose and meaning. I respect the type of person who has done the self-work because people like us, my friend, that have dealt with a lot of trauma, that have dealt with a lot of adversity. When we heal, we become weapons of good.

I promise you that. Healing is a scary thing to start doing, but when you do, you become this undeniable weapon of good because you have felt pain, loneliness, sadness, rejection. And when you heal from that, you are this anti-fragile, strong motherfucker that has this willpower to persevere through anything, which means you can do a lot more good for the world than the

average person who hasn't dealt with any of these traumas, adversities, and setbacks of life. And by the way, if you haven't dealt with any of that shit, I'm happy for you. Good for you. good for you. You ought to be out there doing your own hard shit, right? Like some of us, like life has given us hard shit to deal with over and over and over again. And we continue to do hard shit. But those of you, if you've never done anything, you've never experienced any hardship, any suffering, any adversity, any trauma, well, maybe start doing some hard things, right? Build

yourself into an anti-fragile, resilient human. And when you do, you make more money, you have more meaning and you develop a higher level of self-mastery. Guys, one place you can start with this is with my six-week marathon challenge. I want you to go to bedroseculein.com forward slash challenge or somewhere in the description of this episode, you can find the marathon challenge. It's absolutely free. And you can download the entire training program, nutrition program, motivational audio and video programs for me for the entire six weeks.

And guess what? It cost you nothing. because if you don't want to go sign up for a marathon, you know, six weeks before that marathon and then start training using that protocol that I built, that's okay. You can simply drive your car 13.1 miles and then drive it back to your house, 13.1 miles. And there's their 26.2 miles, a marathon.

So you will use that training protocol, train for six weeks, run that marathon, challenge yourself. It'll be difficult. It will be painful. But man, what a feeling of, confidence and fucking badassery that you feel when you cross that finish line and you realize I did something very difficult in six weeks and was able to move my body 26.2 miles. I'm a fucking bad motherfucker like Jules would say from Pulp Fiction.

And with that in mind, I want to let you guys know that I love you to pieces. And if I'm hard on you, it's because I love you. And I wish more people were hard on each other in a brutally truthful. meaningful, authentic way so that we can all elevate together to that better place. Finally, remember this,

that averages the enemy, that success is your responsibility, and change can take place in an instant if you are willing to flip the switch. I'll see you next time. What's the difference between me and you? Back when Q was rolling with Lorenzo

and a Benzo, I was banging with a gang of instrumental.