Bedros Keuilian Podcast Show - 106. THIS is what is killing your goals and dreams!!

Episode Date: October 8, 2024

The average American lives until about 80 years old. If you look at it that way, we don’t have a whole lot of time to waste by not chasing our goals and dreams. The question is, what are you going to do to put yourself and your family in a position that you can have financial freedom? REGISTER FOR THE LEGACY TRIBE Get the Life, Money, Meaning & Impact You Deserve https://bedroskeuilian.com/legacytribe JOIN MY FREE 6-WEEK CHALLENGE: Transform into a Purpose-Driven Man https://bedroskeuilian.com/challenge TruLean Supplements | https://www.trulean.com/pages/bedros Get 50% Off Trulean Subscribe & Save Bundle Use Code: BEDROS Few Will Hunt Apparel | https://fewwillhunt.com/ Get 20% Off Your Entire Order Use Code: BEDROS OPEN A FIT BODY LOCATION A High-Profit, Scalable Gym Franchise Opportunity Driven By Impact https://sales.fbbcfranchise.com/get-started?utm_source=bedros BECOME A MODERN DAY KNIGHT: Join the MDK Project https://www.themdkproject.com/ PODCAST EPISODES: https://bedroskeuilian.com/podcast/ STAY CONNECTED: Website | https://bedroskeuilian.com/ Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/bedroskeuilian/ LinkedIn | https://www.linkedin.com/in/bedroskeuilian Twitter | https://twitter.com/bedroskeuilian

And it's so important for you to understand that your attention is being fought for more than ever. Welcome to the Bedroes-Cooleon Show. Back when Q was rolling with Lorenzo and a Benzo, I was banging with a gang of instrumental. I figured it out. I know exactly the problem, the thing that's causing the death of your goals and dreams. Guys and gals, welcome to the Bedros-Coolean show. My name is Bedros-Culian, and today I've got a great episode for you. And today we're going to talk about the thing that is causing the death of your show.

your goals and dreams. Now more than ever, I'm hearing from people who are telling me that it's hard for them to achieve their goals. It's hard for them to achieve their dreams. It's hard for them to be ambitious and take action, that they're running out of time, that they don't have energy, and I figured out what the problem is. The problem is not the fact that you don't have time. The problem is not that things have gotten more difficult. Yes, I agree with you. inflation is definitely eating away at your bank account if you're on a salary or some kind of hourly pay where you have a job and you only have a fixed income right and not making commissions where you can maybe out hustle everybody else and go make more sales or if you're an entrepreneur

you can just put in more time more effort or create another income stream through your business model or make another offer and end up increasing your revenue i get it inflation interest rates the cost of living has gotten gone through the roof. I get it. There's a lot of uncertainty with the politics out there. People don't know, is it going to be Trump? Is it going to be Kamala? And all of that could be a valid reason, but to a very small degree.

But I know the exact problem, the thing that is causing you to not achieve your goals and dreams on a day-to-day basis, let alone monthly, yearly, and then lifelong. And I don't know if you know it or not, but you only have a fine amount of time, right? You only have a finite amount of time. And I put up a post on Instagram a couple weeks ago and I said, I looked up online. I think the average American is going to live 78 or 79 years, something to that effect. And if you're going to live 78 or 79 years and if you're somewhere in your 30s or in my case, I'm 50 now, there's not a lot of summers left.

If you just think about how many summers are left between now and say 80 years old when the average lifespan is, there's not a lot of summers left. And so what are you going to do to put yourself, your family in a position that you can have financial freedom? What are you going to do to be able to live a life, the rest of your life, where you feel a sense of purpose and significance? Especially you men out there. Like, listen, we thrive off building something that gives us a sense of significance, of purpose, of status, right?

Where you feel like I've accomplished something. And for a man who hasn't accomplished anything, hasn't built anything that gives them a sense of status or significance, that is one of the fastest ways to jettison yourself into depression, into regret in the future. and into basically giving up on life. And I figured out what the freaking problem is. The problem is not a lack of time. The problem is not a lack of energy. The problem is not the politics and the uncertainty and the inflation and the interest rates and all that stuff. There are all those external factors.

But as we always talk about on the show, if we blame everything on external locus of control, like if we close the borders down, my life would be better. If, you know, Trump or Kamala gone into office, my life would be better. If the interest rates went down, my life would be better. Okay, all those little factors might make your life a tiny bit better. But the biggest factor are the things that you are doing on a day-to-day basis. And I figured this out because I'm like, fuck, man, we all have the same 24 hours in the day. And let's say you average anywhere from six to seven, maybe eight hours of sleep.

What else is happening in your life that you are not achieving your goals? Now, one might argue, I'm not setting goals. I'm not excited about my dreams. I don't even have any dreams that I've set out for. All right. So for that person who's not even setting goals, doesn't have any personal goals or professional goals in their life, you can stop listening to my show. You can stop watching it on YouTube, right?

If you're not ambitious, you're not driven, you don't want to set, goals, you don't have dreams. The rest of you that are watching and listening to the show, you know the show is about money, meaning, and self-mastery, right? We're here to make money because money gives us options. When you have money, you have options. You can live in a gated community. You can move across the country to a better state. You can buy better quality of food. You can have better experiences with your family. Money gives you options. If God forbid you and your family gets sick, you have options on what kind of health care you can get. You can pay for better health care, better medication, better hospitalization. Money truly is a

vehicle to freedom. Money allows you to be generous and help out the charities and the church and the causes that you believe in. Money allows you to help out family members who are maybe not doing as well as you are. Think about how many people you wish you could help out. You wish you could serve. Like I know that if you're watching or listening to this show, you are a servant leader. Or at least you crave to be a servant leader. And I know it eats away at you when you're like, fuck, man, I'm not making enough money for myself, let alone to be able to be generous for this cause that I believe in. Church, charity, right? Family members, friends, maybe you want to help out. So money is important to make, man. But again, it takes time to do it and you have to be able to stay focused to get it done.

And then meaning, like I said, every single one of us have to have a sense of meaning, purpose, or significance. Male or female, it doesn't matter. The only thing that separates the men and women is that most women are ultimately going to have a child, right? And if you're a woman and you have a child, you can attest to this. And if you're, if you can leave it in the comments, just to back me up on this. Like, once a woman has a child, it's like a built in purpose. Like I know that, you know, Andrew and Chloe, my son and daughter, when they were born, even now at this age, Andrew's Chloe's 17. And like, I feel such a great sense of purpose in leading them, in getting them ready to launch

into life. I could only imagine from a mom's position, right? From mom's position, it's very different. Mom is like mama bear. Mom gets to nurture them from day one. Moms, you guys feel the babies in your tummy and you're like, holy cow, I feel. a baby growing. There's so much significance and purpose for a mom as they have a child. And men don't have that. Men don't have a built-in sense of purpose and significance like women do. And so if you're a

woman and you have a child, you're like, this is my main job, my main concern to make sure this little guy or gal lives, survives, thrives, grows, learns, launches into life. And yeah, on the for all us dads, we were like, okay, I want to be a part of this, but it's never the same connection that mom's going to have with that baby. Never, ever, ever. That's just the reality. We'll never have that same sense of deep purpose and protection and meaning. And trust me, I know some of us dads are savage, like we would die and we would kill for our children. But as men, we have to go out there and develop our purpose. We have to go out there and find insignificance. We have to go out there and do something that is so great, maybe in an industry,

maybe in a space, maybe for the world that gives us a sense of status. It makes us feel like, all right, I've left my fingerprint on the planet, right? And then, of course, self-mastery. The show is about self-mastery. Like, you want to grow, you want to evolve, you want personal development, you want to heal from the wounds that you've had, either from being abused as a kid, being neglected, being told that you can't, whatever it came from. Maybe it came from mom and dad. Maybe it came from someone treating you poorly and beating you and abusing you. Like, I've shared my story, man. I've been abused.

I've been mistreated. But if I didn't heal from it, I wouldn't be able to build the empires that I have. I wouldn't be able to build the businesses that I have. And to be able to use that money for good to help out causes like Shriner's Children's Hospital, Toys for Todd's, have 95, six or seven kids now adopted through Compassion International, right? Like that's the beauty of money, meaning, and self-mastery. But what is stopping you? I'm going to tell you right now.

The thing that is stopping you from achieving your goals and dreams, I don't care if it's business. I don't care if it's creating that side hustle. I don't care if it's from getting your fitness goals. Like how many of you have this goal and dream? I want to get in shape and stay in shape. Yet what happens? You still look the same.

You still feel the same. Lethargic, fat, out of shape. unmotivated, well, it's not a lack of time. We all have the same amount of time. Like I said, you sleep six to eight hours a day. Okay, got it. Maybe you work another eight hours a day, you know, add some commute time here and there.

You got some family time. But you know what's taking you away from your goals and dreams, right? Because if we all have the same time, the thing that's taking you away is a lack of attention, is a lack of focus and, of course, a lack of impulse control.

And that's the thing I want to talk to you about today, fellas. Guys, quick interruption to the show. Let me tell you all about the Truline Wellness Shot. If you're like me and you care about your health, hydration, and building a strong immune system so you can stay active and you can get after it in life, then you want to try the Trulian Wellness Shot. I used to take 11 different supplements in the morning. Things like vitamin C, vitamin D, vitamin B12, echinacea, ginger, and a whole bunch more. Now it's all included in the Trulian Wellness Shot. I want to send you a 30-day supply for 50% off.

Just go to truleen.com, use the code word bedros. My name to get 50% off. You'll also get free shipping. You get a 30-day unconditional money-back guarantee. And $1 of every order goes to Shriner's Children's Hospital. And when you use the code word bedros and do the subscribe and save, which is a Trulene Tribe program, every month you'll get a fresh supply of Trulian Wellness shots for an additional 20% off and free shipping.

And $1 of every monthly order will go to Shriner's Children's Hospital. So go to truene. com, use code word bedros and take advantage of this amazing offer. Now back to the show. And it's so important for you to understand that your attention is being fought for more than ever. Everyone starts DMing me these days and tells me I've got ADD and I've got ADHD. Well, okay, let's assume that you've got ADD and ADHD. First of all, 99% of you that are messaging me that, you're just self-diagnosing, right? And the social media platforms that you're spending an average of three hours a day on aren't helping because they've gotten so good at getting you to swipe,

swipe, swipe for those quick dopamine hits that if you actually did clinically have ADD or ADHD, the way that social media is feeding you content and looking for those quick dopamine hits and they're giving you short bits of content, I mean, look at what YouTube has done now, right? YouTube, when you open up your YouTube app, they're now serving. serving up shorts instead of long form. You have to go and find a long form. At the very top of your YouTube app are the shorts. How come? Because they realized they can create addiction faster by shortening your attention span. There is a war against you and your attention span. And you are allowing YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, and all the other social media platforms to win this

battle against you. The more that you sit there and doom scroll, the more you start losing your ability to pay attention for a prolonged period of time. And if you want to achieve anything in life, you have to be able to make a time commitment that is longer than 30 seconds or 60 seconds. Yet you will watch 30 seconds and 60 second videos over the day that, accumulates to an average of three hours a day. That is what the average American right now is consuming of three hours of social media content per day. Now, you give me an additional three hours a day, just five days a week, that's 15 hours a week. I can create a whole new business that generates at least five to $10 million a year at the end of 12 months. I promise

you that. Why? Because I know how to create businesses. I know how to get attention. I know how to buy attention. I know how to convert attention into money. And I know how to retain clients and customers by giving them the results that they paid for. And I know how to ask for referrals. And I know how to create systems and processes. And I know how to bring in people into my organization and lead them to produce the outcome. I could do all of that with an additional three hours a day. The time that you are spending on social media, the time that you are spending chasing down information about politics, the time that you are spending worrying about P. Diddy and who he's fucked and who he's about to out next is time that you could be spending on your fitness goals.

It's time that you could be spending on building a business goals. It's time that you could be spending on building another business or creating a side income stream that could get you and your family out of debt. They can create a whole new lifestyle for you and your family. They can create whole new opportunities and experiences for your family. They can give you and your family more options in terms of quality food, time together, a better place to live, money to put away for the future. Because uncertainty for the future is so high. right now, yet the average person doesn't have more than a thousand dollars sitting in their

bank account. That is heartbreaking. Yet you have three hours a day on average to dedicate to social media. And it's costing you your fitness. It's costing you your family. Because think about this. If you're like, well, you know what? Dude, I work a lot and I don't want to create another business. Okay. I dare say that extra three hours could go towards your fitness and your family. Forget about money. You work a lot, you're happy with the money you're making, you're not spending a lot of money, you're actually living in a very frugal way, you're investing some of that money for the future, you've got a 401k or some kind of pension plan building up, all right, cool.

That additional three hours a day that they're fighting for your attention. Could you spend it towards your fitness? Could you spend it towards your family to build better connections, to raise kids who are going to be an asset to humanity and not a live? who are going to be athletic and not fat, who are going to understand to be free thinkers and not robots, who are going to feel a connection from mom and dad instead of being connected to their device because they see you connected to your device. And so it doesn't matter how much you tell them to not spend time on their device,

monkey see, monkey do. And so I'm telling you right now, guys, there is a massive fight for your own. attention. There's a massive fight for your focus. And each time you give in to doom scrolling, social scrolling, screen sucking. And I know you might justify it by, look, man, I'm just gathering content. I'm gathering good information. Trust me, there's not that much information. Three hours a day, like you can get a fucking PhD after four years with three hours a day. And so the reality is you are now partitioning your attention and putting yourself in, in a position where anything valuable that you dream about, goals, dreams, ambitions,

takes time, takes focus, and takes impulse control. And if you've got your notifications turned on on your device, on your iPad, on your MacBook, on your iPhone, or you goofballs that run the Androids and have that green text message, shout out to project instructor Steve Eckhart with his Android. green text message. We've got an operation black site group text with all the instructors. And we had to leave him out of that group text because if we send a video to that group text and he's part of that group text, the video comes out all fucked up.

So we literally had to leave him out of that group. And I'm like, Steve, you got to get a fucking iPhone. But he's like, no, man, I'm not getting an iPhone. But that's neither here nor there. The point of this is you got those notifications turned. None. Guess what those notifications are doing? Every time you get a ping, a notification ping, it is eating away at your ability to control your impulses. It is getting you to become more impulsive. So if you're wondering, hey, man, I just can't focus. I think I have ADD. I think I have

ADHD. I've got these goals. I got these dreams, but I can't get anything done. I can't pay attention long enough. Well, you can't pay attention because everything that is being pumped to you in terms of content is short clips. I mean, think about movies. There was a time when movies that go watch any quality Quentin Tarantino movie, whether from the 90s or even the newer ones today, Quentin Tarantino is probably the only one that still has prolonged dialogue. Every other movie that you watch, they do some kind of a cut. Every two to four seconds, there's a cut. They can't have prolonged dialogue where the camera's just facing, one actor for a prolonged period of time because they figured out by doing focus groups that

your ass ain't paying attention. You're not paying attention because you have been conditioned by Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, YouTube shorts to just consume tiny bits of information at a time, to just have enough attention for 10 seconds, 20 seconds, 30 seconds, maybe 60 seconds if you're lucky, and then swipe for another dopamine hit. Swipe for another dopamine hit. Look at the next batch of shorts or reels that you watch. Watch how quickly, all the popular ones in a 50 or 60 second video, every two to three seconds, there's cuts and different angles.

Those are designed to keep your attention because your attention span has shrunk so much. So you're spending three hours a day on average on social media. Some of you even longer and you know it. You can deny it all you want, but you're sitting in your fucking car screen sucking. You're sitting in the bathroom on the shitter, screen sucking. You're at work, screen sucking. At night, in bed, your screen sucking. On the couch while watching television, screen sucking.

You're double screen sucking. Double screen sucking. Imagine how much of your attention starts to erode. And then when you leave those notifications on, when you try and stay focused, you can't because a notification instantly hits that dopamine. separate and goes, uh-oh, someone posted something that you follow. You might want to check it out. You go, fuck, I should. And so you start getting conditioned to have less focus. So now, short attention span, compounded by less focus, compounded by lack of impulse control, leads to someone

barely scraping by in life, being fat, dumb, dopey, disconnected from the people that you love, like mentally and emotionally. Like, you'll be around each other. You will this afternoon, tonight when you're around your family. Watch how you'll be there in the same room, but you're all on your fucking devices. No one's connecting. No one's connecting. There's really no intimacy. There is no meaningful conversation anymore because you have put greater value on content created by people.

that don't add value to your life. Look, I have no problem if you're watching content like this or listening to content like this that's going to enrich your life, make your life better, and then you're going to go take action on it. But most of the shit you're watching out there is just gossip and drama-based, fear-based, things that create doubt and uncertainty,

politics, ditty, or whatever the current new cycle is delivering. Things that have nothing. do with your life, all things that are external locus of control. Yet I know you have an ambition to be fit, to be a better dad, to be a better mom, to make more money, all those things you can do with an extra three hours a day. You don't have ADD. You don't have ADHD. 99% of you don't. There's probably a small percent of you out there that are clinically suffering from ADD or ADHD. And I say that's a superpower anyway. Because people that have

ADD and ADHD have a lot of energy. They're very creative. So go work out first thing in the morning. Put that energy to use. Find something that you're so passionate about that you could lock in and focus on because people that have ADD and ADHD know how to get into flow state. Turn off those fucking notifications. Start focusing more.

Start thinking about delayed gratification instead of instant gratification. Every time you respond to a notification, every time you respond to a text message, Someone texts you immediately you're responding to it. You are eroding your ability to stay focused. You are killing your impulse control. You're becoming more impulsive, less focused, and eroding your attention span. And then you go, I'm pretty certain. I have ADD and ADHD.

And on top of that, I ain't got no time anyway. So I guess I have to be a fat fuck who's disconnected from my loved ones and who's always broke. Yet, I see it. When I'm out there going through Starbucks, I see people in their cars like fucking zombies facing their screens. I just want to like punch the glass and be like, yo, yo, there's a whole fucking life out here. Live it. Why are you trying to live vicaracy through someone's bullshit stories to the gossips that

they're sharing, the drama that they have in their life? God damn. And all you have to do is turn off the notifications. Condition yourself to delay gratification a little bit at a time. Go out and work out. You want dopamine? Go get the best dopamine ever. Accomplish goals.

Small little goals. Get an exercise in for the day. Eat your meals that are designed to help you stay lean and jacked instead of fat and floppy with gelatinous titties that I can milk. Guys, I want to see you win. But with three hours a day going out there, Screen sucking, taking away your attention, your focus, and your ability to maintain impulse control. It's impacting your health, man, mentally too, by the way, you know it.

Because when a man does not achieve their fitness goals, their family goals, you feel like I didn't love up my family right. I wasn't really there for them. Financially, I'm not able to provide what they want. I'm always stressed. Yet I'm going to distract myself. I believe now, like social media, screen sucking, fucking video games, all that stuff. You name the screen, it is an attention eater. And by the way, just three hours a day is social media.

It's not like the fucking video games and the TV. I'll be conservative and I add another hour because it's probably more like two hours a day on top of that shit, television and video games. Let's just add another hour. So that's four hours a day going towards other shit that should go to use your fitness, your mental health, your financial, social. sovereignty, your financial freedom, the connection for your family, loving them up. Remember, man, if you have 80 years to live, do the math, how many summers are left?

I was talking to my son about it. He goes, dad, on top of that, the first 10 years don't really matter. The last 10 years don't matter. He's not wrong. So if you got 60 years, right, of actually doing something that matters in life, achieving your goals, your dream, setting yourself up to be. be financially secure and not eating fucking canned dog food and working at Walmart as a door greeter telling a story about my wife left me and divorced me because I couldn't provide for the family

and my kids don't want to hang out with me because they're damaged and they realized I was never emotionally and mentally and physically there for them anyway that was a poor example of a fucking human and I never saved up enough money invested enough money created multiple income streams to put myself in a position to retire well or to be able to add value to humanity. And here I am today eating fucking dog food and working at Walmart as a door greeter. I'm not saying that that's going to happen to you. I am saying that a version of that story exists in your life, in the future. And currently, you struggle and you suffer because you know you're not accomplishing your goals and dreams, yet you're letting them win the battle of taking your attention three to four hours

a day, every single day, seven days a week. And so if there's any one wish that I have for you guys, it is for you to start developing focus, impulse control, and taking back your attention. Put your attention where it matters. Put your attention on the things that actually produce a positive outcome. And if you can do that, you'll see that in the next 12 months, your life physically, financially, and relationally is very different. Guys and gals, thank you so much for watching and listening to this episode of The Bedros Coolion Show.

If you got any value from this episode, please do me a favor if you're on YouTube and subscribe, like and comments so that the algorithms work in our favor. And we can share this with more people and help them win back their financial freedom, their sovereignty, their mental well-being, their health and fitness, their relationships. And of course, if you're on the podcast platforms, do us a favor. Leave us a review and a thumbs up. And above all, remember this, that average is the enemy, that success is your responsibility and change can take place in an instant if you are willing to flip the switch.

I'll see you next time. What's the difference between me and you? Back when Q was rolling with Lorenzo and a Benzo. I was banging with a gang and instrumental.