Begin Again with Davina McCall - BONUS Episode: The 5-Minute Daily Routine That Rewires Your Habits with Shahroo Izadi

Episode Date: January 25, 2026

Rewire your habits in just 5 minutes a day 📝✨ This is your invitation to stop fighting impulses and start understanding them. In this Reset Month bonus episode, award-winning psychologist Shahroo Izadi shares a simple daily practice for building impulse control, breaking self-sabotaging patterns, and creating lasting change. No willpower battles. No self-punishment. Just a short morning and evening routine that helps you understand your triggers, plan kinder responses, and gather real data on who you are, not who you think you “should” be. 🌱 This episode is for you if: You keep falling back into the same habits You feel stuck in all-or-nothing thinking You want change that actually lasts You’re tired of beating yourself up when you slip ✨ Shahroo’s method teaches you how to: Identify your daily impulse triggers in minutes Check your emotional “bandwidth” each morning Re-route cravings into healthier reward choices Make conscious decisions instead of automatic reactions Track patterns without shame or failure Over time, you’ll build a personal record of your behaviour — so change becomes predictable, repeatable, and compassionate. 🎁 Don’t miss our RESET giveaway! Sign up for the Begin Again newsletter for exclusive tools and a chance to win over £750 in wellness prizes: http://beginagainshow.com 🎥 This episode is part of our RESET MONTH series, your invitation to simplify, understand yourself, and begin again. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Presents Laura versus Fruit Flies. Swarming your fruit and terrorizing your kitchen, these little freaks multiply at a rate that would make a rabbit say, yo. Chill. But Laura shopped on Amazon and saved on cleaning spray, countertop wipes, and fly traps. Hey, Fruit Flies, your baby boom ends here. Save the Everyday with Amazon. I'm with Sheru Izardy and this is the third extra that you've got for Wellness Month.

It's January. How you doing? Are you doing okay? Sharu is an amazing award-winning psychologist and she is also an award-winning author, best-selling author and speaker. And she has come up with a method that is going to help you stick to your guns. and change the narrative that you have around yourself to change your life, basically. Right, teachers' pets here, look at me.

I'm positioned. I'm very impressed. Eager. I'm very impressed. This exercise is one that I get people to do that reinforces that the version of you that wants to change your habits is the version of you that's really clear on what you want and why you don't want to be where you are now.

Yes. But is a version of you that you will probably not be able to access very frequently. Yes. Other than those moments of desperation. So what you want to do is that every morning, you want to wake up, depending on how you feel, depending on what's going on in your life, you will wake up with a certain amount of bandwidth. Yes. And what you're looking forward to do for the day. Right.

And if impulse control is an issue for you with anything, you know, like whether it's alcohol or is yelling at your boss or whatever else, if impulse control is an issue for you, it can be helpful to think that every day you're waking up with a certain number of steps between you having a bad idea and. following through with an unhelpful action. Yes. And so what it can do, help to do enormously, is to anticipate, based on what's happened in the past and based on your knowledge of yourself. Yes. For five minutes in the morning, I do it by the kettle because it's the first place I go. And I dictate it because I can't be bothered to write it down.

And I literally write down if I had to guess what will make me want to do things quickly, what will make me want to blow things up today? What will make me lose my impulse control? And ultimately, what will move me from behaving from that version of myself? That's the age I am now that knows what I know now on my most confident day. And it will be things like hormones. There'll be things that are unchangeable, but the pattern you notice the more. There'll be things like you notice like other people.

There will be things like you noticing, well, on Wednesdays people tend to bring in cake. So that will be a test. And on Wednesdays, I tend to miss lunch or whatever it is. So you'll have your own ones. Petrol stations are desperate placement. So on a day when you know that you're most likely to eat sugar, why don't we use that as an example? If you're comfortable using that as an example. It's much.

Sugar's my, for sure. So what does a day look like if you had to wake up this morning and identify, what could tempt me based on today, what you've got today, how you feel today and what today looks like? What could tempt me to eat sugar? I would say either like going out for a meal, so like going out for dinner. If I go out for dinner with Michael, I'm going. I will go, stick it off a pudding. Okay. And he'll look at me and he'll go, I've now said, please can you help me?

And he'll go, I don't think we need it. And I'll go, oh, thank you. But if he said yes, I'd go, great. I instigate it. So that's a danger. Going out for dinner is somewhere I'd like to change patterns. And the danger by extension, I would add, would be being enabled. Or being given.

Yes, being given permission. Or somebody going, go on. You deserve it. Okay. So I deserve it thinking. Yes. Is one of the risks that I am going to come up against today. Can I actually write that down?

Go for it. Yeah. Right. Dinner, Michael. Whatever makes sense to you. Dinner, Michael. Stick your toffee pudding. I deserve it.

Thinking is brilliant. Yeah. And by the way, you do, everyone's definition is different. Maybe you do deserve it. But what you don't deserve is to beat yourself up for five days afterwards and spiral and eat 10 times more. Yeah. So that's where the kind choice is very personal.

So if I. think, so essentially what you can do is associate it with what gives me the kind of using thoughts like I've done it now, I've blown it. What else today could do that for you? Well, just having one of something would give me that I've blown it. I'm just going to. What about the setup to even have the one? What would increase the likelihood of you having one today? I'll tell you the worst thing for me isn't even I deserve it. It's just pushing the fuck it button. There's something in me that's naughty where I go, oh, fuck it. And I think, sorry, you're going to have to beep a lot here. But I make it sound or feel fun. Okay.

Do you know what to mean? Yes. So when you, and so you would say when I'm not, reframing cravings as mischief. For example, if I start hearing that voice, then for you, it would be the equivalent of hearing that I can just have one. Yes. Right? Yeah. So you want to start as early as possible. That's why they say, you know, relapse doesn't come out of nowhere.

Yes. When you start doing this exercise for five minutes every day, what you start doing is you start isolating the periods of the day that you actually need to worry about and they are brief. Like if, for example, this evening, you're at dinner, you have a lovely evening and then you decide not to have the sticky toffee pudding. For example. I feel so good about myself. But how long would you, how long would it be difficult for? I don't think it would be difficult for long at all.

say no and then it's gone. Because today we've had, and hopefully it would also be because you go, oh, now I'm going to want the city tough putting you, then I'm going to do, da, da, da, da, da, the same way you have with using. Like if something bad happened, if something, God forbid, you know, I'm sure you've had this example recently where you think, this is the sort of state I would be in an ordinarily use. Yes.

And so I want you to understand that if the fucket switch ends you in places you don't want to be. Yes. Then what you want to recognize is not when the fuck it switch has already been done because the train has left the station by then, right? What you want to identify is the most subtle way and usually it comes from thinking. Usually it's when someone's criticized you or something's taken you back to that place of feeling like a piece of shit basically and taking you back to that narrative. So what will make you think, oh, I can just have one. Nothing will happen. Those are the things you want to listen out for. And then you don't have to worry about sticky toffee pudding 7pm. you can just listen out for

when I decide to be a rebel with no cause and I forget that I'm the age that I am and start behaving as though I can't have one of something, it's not about this, something else is going on. But what's really interesting about what you've just done for me now is I've had to really think about what are the triggers. It hasn't been obvious to me. That's quite interesting.

You would think that I would know what the triggers are, but I've had to think about these two. I deserve it thinking and reframing mischief for me. I'm suddenly like, oh my God, I do this all the time. And then if you write that down every day, you are thinking about it and more aware of it. So then you can do something about something you're more aware of. And it's a need.

This isn't remedial. This is also identifying, I'm a mischievous person. Yes. I would like it not to be channeled this way. Yes. So I shall be challenging it this way. Yeah. You're acknowledging your needs throughout the day.

You're not saying, I'm just going to hold everything down and might not call it. And it's not going to not be mischievous. No, I'm just going to pick the way. These guys that think it again would really miss it if I stopped. Would you? None of us should be. Mischief is the one. But what you want to find out is what you want to assume is that you're going to want to do the things that you've always done.

Yeah. Right? And you're going to be swimming against the current. Yes. The other thing that's fantastic about this exercise is it in three or four weeks, it will become so predictable. You will become so predictable to yourself. Yes. And you'll realize that every time was like, well, yeah, but not this stick off with, not this one.

because I'm, today is important because it's Thursday, so I should have a sticky point. And it becomes just like AA where you're like, yes and no. Yes. But the only difference is that you might decide because you can, that under these circumstances that's a yes and under these circumstances, it's a no. So for me, my criteria has become, I consume my substances that I feel less empowered around because of my leg, you know, my history with them, not disempowered anymore, but less empowered.

I consume them when I'm getting into it, not getting out of it. Yes. That's my criteria. If something's great, then I know that I can, I'm going to bounce. back after one and I'm going to enjoy it. If my life isn't going well and I consume something like that quickly before I can even notice myself. Yeah. And you don't enjoy it or nothing. That is not going to return. That's not going to return in countless ways for days. And so it's not worth it for me. And I just cut to the end with that. And that's the maturity and the self-finance.

So here where you would write like, okay, sticky toffee pudding. Initially what this will do from a behavioral change perspective is in the morning if you anticipate what will come up, there's, you know, the sort of smoggery. comes with knowing like, oh, I guess this, I know myself, it will interrupt the pattern in terms of automatic action. But what it will also do is that over time, it will teach you more broadly that every day you're waking up with a certain amount of bandwidth. And regardless of the habit that you find most difficult, ultimately, it's all the same.

So now, when I notice myself on social media a lot, usually those would have been the times when I was eating. So you become very aware this is not about one habit. you need a temperature of how you feel every day, not least before everything's coming in ready to distract you and take you away. It's a little agreement that you make with yourself to say, I know, based on what's always happened, what's likely to happen today. I acknowledge my vulnerability to it.

And actually, when I reduce it to that, you've got about 10 minutes of decision to make and you're in the clear. Whereas if you think are thinking all day, oh, I hope I don't give into the sticky stuff you're putting. I hope I don't give into it. And that's ours. Make your decision. Even if you decided to have it, that's a different thing.

because then your mission isn't to white-knuckle it and wonder which version of Vivina will be there. Although not to hate yourself when you do it, if you decide to do it, you have made a conscious decision knowing that tomorrow you're not going to feel guilty about it. You're going to go, okay, that was yesterday, but today I'm going to restart again and I'm going to avoid my deserve it thinking

and I'm going to reframe my mischievous streak. Absolutely. All I will say, though, is it's that most people won't enjoy it at first. they will try but I don't want them to become disillusioned what will happen is that you will go into a panic

if it was as easy as that unfortunately I forgive myself it's okay the diet industry has made it for example with food where you are going to go into a panic because you've done something

objectively bad no one's ever recommended if you want to be healthy and lose weight have a sticky toffee pudding right? No. So that isn't even a complicated one

I've been bad exactly yum but I've ruined it now right and so what you want to do is even if you feel that way

which you should expect to for a while, because we're not asking you to turn on a dime, you know, but we're asking you to gather data. So you should go through the motions as though you haven't messed up. You know? Yeah. It's like when people gain weight, and what they do is, rather than the logical thing,

which would be, I've gained weight, so I might eat less. They think, I've gained weight, which means my diet isn't working, so I'm going to eat a lot more for a week, and then I'm going to eat nothing and I'll lose it. Yeah. It makes no sense, aside from anything else. So what you want to do in the morning, essentially,

is to identify what the version of you that is your calmest, wisest, most empowered version would do when met with the challenges that you will invariably be met with today. Yes. Based on what's going on in your day. I'm going to a restaurant. The challenges I'll be faced with are this. And then it'll become more and more nuanced, the self-awareness exercise because you'll notice,

for example, that when you've given yourself permission to do something because you've planned it and preempted it and decided it's okay, you might choose not to. Because that feeling of it's going to get taken away, I have to, starts to lose its grip. And in the meantime, you're building data. And these become reminders, because as you know, you don't know what you don't know. You don't wake up every day, right, going so bad, I'm not anxious. I had to think about it. And also, if you put it in a book, I mean, I quite like the idea of you dictating it into a phone.

I do. I tend to write it down as a ritual when I can be bothered because I like seeing the difference. And I like seeing how many things I'm just not even thinking about anymore. Because if you dictate it into notes on your phone, it would still be there. That's what I do. You'd be able to refer back to it. And the things that you... So for people...

that really don't want to write. Yeah, dictated. That's actually quite a good idea, isn't it? Yeah. And do it like on the loo, do it further kettle. I always used to think that if I ever got into like a wellness industry, I would be basically, I have to live like ashram life. You know, I'd have to get up in the morning and journal.

No. Oh my God, no. You have to design for your own brain. I'm going to coffee. Number one, I'm going to coffee in the morning. I'm going to be there for three minutes. Me too. I'll do it then. Oh God. That is really helpful. I'll just do it then. And then what are you asking yourself in the evening then?

What did I find difficult that I didn't anticipate? Oh, okay. Until eventually you've got a collection of literally who you are. Yes. Not who you wish you were. So if you do this in the morning, this is probably how you're going to feel. Yeah. So you'll see action and outcome.

And you'll notice what you managed to do, what you didn't manage to do. And what will happen eventually is that you'll get so excited. If you are an all or nothing perfectionist person, you'll be like, well, I want the PM to be fantastic. so I shan't be having that because I've already made it to 9pm. So it hacks your sort of all or nothing, gamifies your all or nothing thinking. Yes. And assumes that you're going to be perfectionist about it. And that tonight, if you don't manage to do what you said you were going to do,

it'll be annoying. It'll be annoying to you. And if you wanted to change that, you'd have to sit in that annoyance and discomfort. Go through the motions tomorrow as though you had had a miso suit for dessert and start to gather data and associations with that food should you wish to do that heavy lifting. But other people, I think, should be allowed to say, this damage has been done too... I used to get so annoyed when people would say to me,

don't restrict. It's really unhealthy. But it's because they didn't realise I had an eating disorder because I was already overweight. But restricting for me meant not gaining massive amounts of weight. That's like saying, oh, Davina, just enjoy a glass of wine. Just enjoy it. Why don't even just enjoy it?

Yeah. You'd be like, I don't think you understand what's about to go down, right? Yeah. I always say to people, I will be naked, dancing on the table. quickly. Yeah. Yeah. Like you've got a design for yourself. Yes. I kept trying to sit cross-legged and like not be naughty and I just thought, no, just find other ways to be naughty. Yes. You know? And I have done. I have found other ways. I mean, I also drink, but I was never my drug of choice. And also I just, I found other ways to be naughty. To be with other naughty

people who want to have naughty conversations and like meet random people and find out their stories. and yes you know when I work with young women a lot of the time they've had to cut out entire parts of their lives that would have had nothing to do with using just to stay safe and it is nice it is important to say look you've got mischief in you

let's find a way to make that yeah yeah like I for example and you can find that feeling for example I like I get that mischievous feeling when I open a door and I don't know what's behind it if I go to like a club or something that's like or anything a restaurant a prep

Yeah. If I go down, I'm like, I don't know what's behind this door. Ah, I could just feel it. I could feel like I might go to the loo. I'm just telling you the story. If that part of me was taken away, I would be bummed out to use a clinical term. I love that. I need mischief.

But if I don't decide where it's going to go, I either need to completely eradicate it. Yes. Or it's going to go somewhere naughty. Yeah. So. Can you now, sorry. So we've, we're now journaling. Five minutes.

Sue, I would like to ask you about paper clips because normally you would use paper clips and we're going to explain why we've got some marbles here because it's easier to see. But normally you would say to people have paper clips maybe in your pocket or something. What would they signify? This is an early doors exercise to bring to people's opinion, the degree to which they are not sabotaging themselves because of low self-worth and things that they don't understand, but literally stopping themselves from making the next best choice and gaining a mastery because of how frequently they speak to. themselves in unkind ways. So they treat a blip like a catastrophe.

Right. So what I tell people to do is to put a bunch of paper clips in your pocket at the beginning of the day. And every time you do something you're not delighted with, any time, listen in on what you say to yourself. And what kind of things has that been? Everything from I'm hopeless. I'm not worth it.

Usually the messages that you didn't give yourself and that you never used to other people. We were talking off camera. I'm stupid. You've said to yourself, I'm not funny. Everyone's worked out that I'm all these things. So I would go like, I'm not that smart. At home, if you've got this at home, this is like a visualization. It's a sweet thing to do with partners and kids and stuff too.

And just be like, look, I would never think that about you. Where did that come from? Because what it does this is when you look at it, you're like, hold on. Okay, so I'm saying these horrible things to myself. On the one hand, if you're on board with thinking, this isn't the mentality that's going to get hard things done. Yes. Right.

And I can appeal to people even with the lowest of self-esteem by saying what would you literally say to someone else? Yes. Right. But the other thing

that it helps you to do is to really keep reinforcing that we are all already having a conversation with ourselves. We're not blank. And when you do this, rather than thinking,

oh my God, I'm so horrible to myself, how will this end? Usually people are pleasantly surprised because they're like, I don't speak that way. Where do that come from? That's not even true anymore. Yeah. So people usually get worried

or overwhelmed because they think, well, I can't change that. I can't go around saying I'm wonderful all day. And I'm like, listen, I'm just asking you to update the information. You're still going around saying that you're the same stuff you were when you were nine. Yes. I still go around saying I'm unfit. I exercise like every day and have done for years. So sometimes it's very pleasantly surprising to realize that it's just an update process

and there's nothing in society that has us go, hey, what program am I running, by the way? Do I want to live exactly the same way my parents did? And it's not a blame game. It's just like I have absorbed a way of doing things. And now I have a bunch of choices. And unless I decide, and unfortunately, unless the shit hits the fan in my life. Yes.

That's ridiculous. We're waiting until people have no resources. So I have to decide to keep doing every year. We should be sat down and be like, right, how am I speaking to myself? Yes. What is new? And it's not woo-woo stuff. It's literal data.

I used to say I was shit at this. And then I demonstrated that I wasn't. And I seemed to keep telling myself that I am. Let's update that. It's a personal inventory. Personal. It is an inventory. and an audit and you know one of the things that's great about writing these things down and making

them quick and easy is that after time as you well know these things become automatic yes as does by extension gratitude and things like that where you think this is where I'm at today this is my responsibility to myself and this is how I'm going to show up and at some times it's going to be harder than others but I know what to do and when I hear these things yeah a I should assume that they are alerts that I can listen to, that give me insight. They're not commands I have to obey. No. And B, if I didn't choose them, they chose me.

I have tools to unlearn them. Thanks, Cherie. My pleasure. So, good. Thank you.