Begin Again with Davina McCall - How To Date Again (Without Losing Yourself): Begin Again Moments

Episode Date: February 15, 2026

What happens when you have to re-enter the dating world after years in a relationship? Paloma Faith reveals the unexpected emotional challenges of dating in her 40s, from feeling out of place on apps to redefining what she truly wants. Instead of seeing it as a setback, she chose to see it as a chance to Begin Again. Alongside her, Paul C. Brunson shares the practical roadmap for midlife dating, how to approach it differently, how to protect your confidence, and how to turn fear into possibility. Dating again isn’t about going backwards. It’s about stepping into a new chapter, with more wisdom, clarity and courage than ever before. These golden nugget moments are taken from Begin Again with Davina McCall, the full episode with Paloma & Paul are available now. Follow us for more and your chance to Begin Again.💚✨ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What I'm interested in is like dating in midlife is really, really hard, I think. Yeah. Because men don't stay single, are they? They're single for about three minutes. They're really good ones like you think, oh my God, where have they all gone? Whereas women are so happy to stay on their own for ages. And also as someone famous, how do you do that? How do you date?

I try to not worry about being famous just in life in general because I don't think it's that healthy. No, but like, isn't it, can you go on dating apps? I did. Did you? Yeah, I don't like them. I've written an article about it if anyone's more interested in the deep of thoughts. But I, I, yeah, with the fame thing, I just, it's not good for me or healthy for anyone if I get worried about it or become paranoid or whatever. Like, I can't do that.

I think it's good for my kids or anything. So I just sort of go, everyone else who's worried about it, that's their thing, but I'm not. So I just carry on. I get on my bus sometimes. Oh yeah, I do that. I go on the supermarket, whatever. I do all of that. I'm not bothered.

But I was thinking dating. And saying I went on the dating app as me. It makes you quite vulnerable. Yeah, I mean, that's amazing. But I don't really, I didn't look at anyone's messages that directly message me. I just looked at people that I'd like, so it was a match. I didn't like read anything appeals. Right. Because they all start it with, I'm a big fan of your music.

What? Definitely don't want to date someone who's a fan of my music. I only like people who think it's rubbish. But, yeah, so I did that. And I don't think my experience of dating apps is much different to anybody else's because I'm famous. But I think it's a melting pot of damaged and unresolved people. And I also think that a lot of men on there go on there for like an ego boost and use it like a really free way to get sex without attachment. So you've got to be careful on there.

And I think maybe I was a bit naive when I did it at first. And also how long ago did you do it? Well, I've done it a couple of times gone on and off like people I go love-hate relationship with it. It started when I was just feeling like I was in that baby jail face. Because when I broke up my ex, the baby was quite young. So when they were about one, I went on it because you're always at home with the baby and they're putting them to bed and sitting next to the cot and all of that stuff. And you're just like, what am I going to do?

Yes, okay, like just growing up. Ironically, I'd done that in the music video before I'd even. broke up with my ex. I did a scene with a baby sat next to me. Oh, my God. And it was like a prophecy. Oh, my God. It was a kind of joke at the time,

and then I was like, the jokes become real. Jokes on me. Yeah. But yeah, I just did it as kind of to feel the time waiting for the kids to go to sleep sort of thing. But I didn't do it in a serious way. But then I met some people, and everyone's really damaged, and I don't know.

I don't have any answers. I don't think I would go on it again. I have deleted them all. I don't think they're of interest to me. I think that I've got too much depth for the people I met on there. I do have this feeling to sort of be beginning again. But like I have this feeling that now I'm having another lie. And I've started it.

And that's scary and all those things. But what I love about the person I am today that wasn't when I was 21 starting adulthood is that I know what I like, I know how to say no to things I don't like, and I'm really kind of empowered by it. Like, I feel sexier than I ever was. I feel like, you know, more silly. I feel more immature almost, like, in a, but then I've got all the important, practical things covered in a really mature way.

Like, you know, the house is in order. The kids are dropped at the right time. They're albeit a bit late sometimes. But like, yeah, I, you know, I feel that's all taken care of. But now it's the beginning of the new life. Need a vehicle that isn't afraid to make a splash? That's the Volkswagen Touse. Capable and confident.

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Typically in our 20s and 30s, we have a lower priority list because you're trying to work things out. As we go up to our 40s, kind of mid-40s, at this point, we begin to have the highest check. Right, the longest. The longest checklist. Yeah. Okay. But then as we get older, the checklist goes down and down and down. So you said something earlier about guys looking for somebody half their age plus seven and

women looking for somebody older. How are we ever going to meet each other in our 50s if that's the case? Our 40s, 40s, 50s in midlife. Yeah. Well, one is that's the old, slowly going away. Has it gone away? No. But that's one.

Yeah. That's one. Secondly, is on an upside is there are more people in the 50 plus dating market looking for partners than ever before, ever before. I mean, half of me is quite sad about that, but half of me is quite happy because for the 50 and 40 year olds, like, well done. Yes, yes. And the reason why I feel so happy, I'm more happy because, all right, I'm connected to research. Yeah, yeah. So Eli Finkel out of New York is. He's done some research around the satisfaction rate in relationships, in marriages. He found that 80% of marriages today are not, they don't feel satisfied with their partner. 80%.

80%. Oh my God. 80%. That's sad. 80%. Whereas 20% feel as satisfied or more satisfied than ever. Now, what does that mean and how do I relate that to being happy with the 50 plus market? So to me, that means, okay, the 20%, this is great.

And they're probably so happy because they have so many tools today, so many great podcasts, et cetera, to listen to. This is good. The 80% are not satisfied, but they're staying in the relationship anyway. So when I see people break away from that relationship, typically I'm happy. What I'm really sad about are those that stay. You know, it's one thing to be alone, but it's another. thing to be in a relationship and still feel alone. That is just incredibly sad.

So if you are 50 plus single sexy out here, I'm like, okay, yes, you go get yours now. You go get yours. And the beauty is you could get yours any way you want it. You don't have to get married. You can have a committed relationship. You can choose to have a polyamorous relationship. You could choose to have whatever formation you want, but you now have the availability to do it. And because they're more 50 plus than ever before, the pool is larger.

There's more tools now to connect. So from that standpoint, I'm optimistic about that. The other thing is when you look at the ages in which people are getting married, you still have the, I think mid-30s is the number one age range. for marriage, but number two is right around 50. So you have a lot of people who have reentered the dating market for whatever reason, empty nest, et cetera, and they're deciding and they're finding partners. And they're finding partners and they're entering relationships that are much stronger than any relationship they've ever had.

And to me, that is beautiful. So I'm happy about those things.