Behind the Bastards - Steven Seagal Wrote a Book (We Read It)

Episode Date: July 23, 2021

Robert is joined by Shereen Lani Younes to discuss Steven Seagal's book, The Way of the Shadow Wolves. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Alphabet Boys is a new podcast series that goes inside undercover investigations. In the first season, we're diving into an FBI investigation of the 2020 protests. It involves a cigar-smoking mystery man who drives a silver hearse. And inside his hearse look like a lot of guns. But are federal agents catching bad guys or creating them? He was just waiting for me to set the date, the time, and then for sure he was trying to get it to happen. Listen to Alphabet Boys on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you know Lance Bass is a Russian-trained astronaut?

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Listen to The Last Soviet on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. What's committing sex crimes? My actor who starred in Hard Target? I think Hard Target was a famous at all film. Is Best Besties with me? There's no film called Hard Target. It's Hard to Kill, maybe. Is it Hard to Kill?

I have no idea. I just control F to Wikipedia page for Hard Target and there's no result. No, no, there's Hard Target. Yeah, he's in a final shootout with John Claude Van Damme. Oh, why didn't you show up? No, no, Hard Target. Wait, no, yeah, it's Van Damme and Steven Seagal. I'm just mad.

Yeah, directed by John Woo. Let me double check here. Why isn't this on his filmography? Yeah, John Claude Van Damme is Chance Boudreau. Huh. Wait, no, maybe he's not in this. Okay, Steven Seagal is not in Hard Target. I don't know why it returns that.

Why don't you just trust me? Like, this is the episode, right? Yeah, where we're going. Okay, next time you just trust me into this shit. Aren't his biggest, isn't his biggest film on Deadly Ground? All his titles of his movies are so wild. They're so stupid. His latest movie, Not Rated, was Beyond the Law.

Sick. Well, that is actually a good title for a movie about Steven Seagal. General Commander. Because he both worked as a cop. China salesman. This is so bad. And while he was working as a cop in a questionably legal capacity, he rammed a tank into a guy's chicken farm and maybe killed a puppy, I think that's the allegation.

He's got allegations of sex trafficking against him. Sexual assault. Almost certainly sexually assaulted women. There's certainly allegations of sexual assault. Numerous. Basically every other year. To have been mobbed up. Yeah.

And there's a lot of interesting evidence behind the mobbed up thing. He's connected to Putin. He's connected to Lukashenko, the dictator of Belarus. He's just a bafflingly bad person. Steven Seagal, right, you hear action movies starting, you're like, okay, well, I expect that they've done some shady shit. They've endorsed products that are made through human trafficking or whatever. They've probably sexually harassed people.

Steven Seagal is like a bad person for a male action star from the 90s. Like he's the worst of them and they're all almost all pretty bad. Like he's the worst of them. I guess we'd say Arnold Schwarzenegger is the best of them, even though he also has allegations of sexual harassment against him. But as far as I can tell, never sexually trafficked a human being. He does have pet donkeys, which I appreciate. Or rammed a tank into a guy's house.

I mean, even just his Wikipedia page is so wild. First of all, fun fact, he has an extensive sword collection and a custom made gun made for him once a month, once had this happen for him. And then he also... I don't believe that. Nor do I. We find out Steven Seagal is writing Steven Seagal's own Wikipedia page. But also there are other things that clash completely.

Like he's a Buddhist and apparently he wrote an open letter to Thailand in 2003 that was urging them to enact a law to prevent the torture of baby elephants. And then he was granted a 1999 the PETA Humanitarian Award. So he's like... Yeah, he's gotten some weird awards. He doesn't deserve them. Yeah. At all.

He's a weirdo. The bad at ways look good for sure. He's got an incredibly horny album that includes a song where he says that he wants the punani tonight. We did a two-parter with Sean Baby about Steven Seagal and he's like... He's pretty bad. Wait, he says the word punani? He says the word punani, Shireen.

Can I leave now? If you listen to it, you can't undo the fact. There's certain bridges you can't uncross, right? It's like the first time you see a dead body. Like you're a little different every other day after that. The first time you hear Steven Seagal sing that he wants the punani tonight, nothing is ever the same. It fundamentally changes you.

Even honestly, Robert, hearing you say that twice doesn't make me the same either. Wasn't necessary. Well, you know, it's kind of like a vaccine, Shireen. So because it's going to have an impact on you, but because I've said it, when you hear Steven Seagal say it, it will have less of a toxic impact on you. I do want someone to just take that excerpt out and just have Robert saying whatever you said about the punani. I hate that I've said the word three times now.

Shireen, I don't like when you say it either. Honestly, if we're talking about this, I can't think of a word I hate more than punani. That's one of the worst words that's ever existed. Yeah, it really is. This is true. It's just such a like, if I were like really into somebody and we were about to like, you know, do a thing and they use that word, I think I would stop. I think it would just be like, well, that's weird.

Like I can't. I can't. We can't proceed with this. So are we saying the word punani might be who I hated that I said that word is the, the newest form of birth control. Yeah, I think it might be more effective than an IUD. Yeah. It's funny.

Fun fact though. Simultaneously has all of the hormonal side effects of an IUD. Yeah. Yeah. Do I know a fun fact about the origin? I just looked it up. I don't know. This is off my head.

Of the word or the IUD. Yeah, punani. Of punani. Okay. Don't make me say it more than once, Robert. Okay. You've said it like six times, Shireen. I'm concerned.

Yeah. We need one of those trackers. We're all pot committed with punani now. Yeah. But okay, apparently it was first used in the Kama Sutra and it's a word to describe the female Donitalia, surprise, surprise, but then the Hawaiian slang for vagina or vulva is also that word and it means beautiful flower. So.

Oh, you know, I don't want to be like. You made it less gross. You made it less gross. I know. I feel bad now, but I also just hate it. I hate what a white person says. That's that's fair, right? Yeah.

A white man. I hate when Steven Seagal. Yeah. I'm sure it's a fine word within its original context and the culture that it was birthed, but Steven Seagal has done unmitigated damage to the term. Oh yeah. Recording it on a song, it's done now. There's no more.

There's no coming back for that word. There's no redemption on that. Yeah. I'm sorry to the, the real meaning of it. You don't deserve that. You beautiful flower. Yeah. Because Steven Seagal, I don't even want to talk about Steven Seagal and flowers.

That just, that in and of itself feels gross to me. Shireen, do you like the written word? Sure. Do you like novels, fiction? Yeah. I pretend to read sometimes. You, yeah. Who doesn't love a good, a good piece of just really getting able to like dig in and get,

you know, so to speak, punani deep in, in a, in a real work of fiction. Well, do you want to know that? That's what I love to do. Hated that, Robert. The fiery passion. Do you want to know one of my favorite books? One of my favorite books, actually, it came out a couple years ago. The author is so fascinating.

The author is, I should say, it's called The Way of the Shadow Wolves, The Deep Stay in High Checking of America. Shireen, I have incredible news. Oh, really? That's what we're reading today. My favorite book. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

It's going to be pretty great. So we talked about this during the Ben Shapiro's Unreadable Book episodes about maybe, maybe doing, you know, The Way of the Shadow Wolves with Katie and Cody, but then I got mailed, actually, an antique book from like a century ago that I'm going to read with them. And it just, I, but I still wanted to give people The Way of the Shadow Wolves because this is a special book. So it's written by Stephen Segal and a fellow named Tom Morrissey. Tom Morrissey is a former U.S. Marshal, a businessman, a writer, and a musician.

I'm getting this from the website where he ran for mayor of Payson, Arizona. And he looks like the guy like, okay, born and raised in Brooklyn, New York, Tom started his writing career in the music business as a songwriter and performer. He wrote songs for such greats as Ray Charles, Richie Havens, Brooke Benton, and The Crazy Elephant. I only know who Ray Charles is and I don't know if this is true. He might be lying. He wrote a book with Stephen Segal.

So keep that in mind. He says he spent a lifetime studying martial arts, including a rare form of Chinese internal martial arts known as Xingyi under Grand Master Kenny Gong of Canton, China. I have to assume he's lying about that because, again, Stephen Segal claims to be a martial arts master, but you can find videos of him doing his, his bullshit, throw people martial arts. And it's just people who have been paid to make him feel like a big man. Yeah.

Like he can't. Like martial arts to white men is what yoga is to white women, you know what I mean? Like they shouldn't be there. Yeah. Or like they shouldn't appropriate it so much. I've known some people who get into like, you know, Jiu Jitsu or whatever and like it can be, it's great for your health. It can be useful in a variety of ways.

That's not what Stephen Segal does. Stephen Segal pretends to throw people in videos where you can hear him wheezing hard enough that he nearly collapses. Every single person both on this podcast and listening to it could take Stephen Segal in a fair fight. I feel incredibly confident of that. Um, like there is not a doubt in my head that no matter who you are listening to this, you could take, and there's like a 12 year old listening and I want you to know, yes,

you too could drop Stephen Segal if you had to and it, it wouldn't be that big a deal for you. I promise you. He's going to like get in where it hurts, like in his knees. Like he's, he's not, he's like an old person now, you know, like I don't, he can't fight back really. I don't mean to, you shouldn't beat up old people, but you should beat up Stephen Segal. You should beat up Stephen Segal.

You should have done that no matter his age, because he physically abused a number of the women he was intimate with, uh, probably all of them based on what we know. Um, again, he's a monster. So Tom Morrissey is his co-author on this because Tom Morrissey is a US Marshal and I believe the character Stephen Segal, Stephen Segal self insert character in the way of the shadow wolves is also a US Marshal. And as you noted, the, the, the sub headline or the subtitle is the deep state and the hijacking of America.

And on the front cover, the front cover of this book is one of the best things I've ever seen in my life. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's Stephen Segal wearing like a 70s leather jacket with like the tassels all down the front, which I think is like, like the fringe. Yeah. And I believe it's, I mean, he claims to have indigenous ancestry, I think.

I don't know how accurate that is because again, he lies about almost everything. I think the jacket is him appropriating native culture. He's got a buckle that I think is a headdress belt buckle and he's wearing a huge, all of this is clearly photoshopped onto his body, a huge turquoise amulet. You can also see him carrying a gun the wrong way in a shoulder holster through a jacket because if you can see, I carry a shoulder holster a lot of the time. If you can see the gun through the split in the jacket when it's open, you're not carrying it properly.

The point is that your gun is not visible because it's a conce, anyway. But like, no, but the way his hand is on the jacket, it's almost like, here it is. Like he, he wants you to see like, oh, he has a gun on him. He wants you to see he's carrying a gun the wrong way because also it's not just that it's visible. It's that the handle is visible right below his sternum in the center of his chest. I don't know how you could wear a shoulder holster in a way that would display the gun in that.

It's, it's, it's wrong. Everything about it is wrong. I mean, I have to know he has a gun. Otherwise he's not a man. Yeah. I mean, I love that. I already thought the cover was ridiculous, but I love that you brought like factual evidence that it is ridiculous.

You know, I would never have looked at that and been like, how do you wear a gun that way? You know what I mean? So thank you. There's some chest rigs. I can't stop looking at it though. It's so bad. There are some, it might, I guess it's theoretically possible he's wearing a chest rig for the

gun. So there's shoulder holsters and then there's rigs where you strap the gun in the middle of your chest and it's meant to be open carried if you're like out in the back country in Alaska and you might encounter a grizzly bear and you want to very quickly be able to access a firearm because you're worried about bears. People carry guns that way for hunting sometimes. People like marshals don't conceal carry gun anyway. I'm going off too much on this guy's carry rig, but it's baffling to me.

It's one of the many things about this book just based off what I've quickly read that it's baffling. What's also funny is the photos used on the back cover. Have you seen that? Sophie, we have a lot to get into here. I'm sorry. It's hilarious. It's like they found one.

What? Sorry. We have to take this one by one, Sophie, otherwise we're not going to get through any of this. Fair enough. The cover outside of the clearly heavily every aspect of the photo of Steven Seagal on the front of the cover is photoshopped. Behind him is a giant wolf that takes up half of the cover with its staring eyes. He's directly in the middle of the wolf's staring eyes.

What gets me is that he probably thought he looked so cool. It's amazing. He thought this. He's got a fucking print of this book cover in his house and it's 12 feet tall. You know he does. This gets him a half chub whenever he walks out into his living room. I don't want to imagine him getting a half chub, but okay. Nor do I.

Yeah. We didn't want to imagine him saying punani, but that's what happened. Robert, god damn it. No more. No more. But I will say. I can't help that he wants the punani tonight. What?

That's the way it goes. Stop it. It was, but this book was self-published. No one wanted to publish it. Yeah. This was, he found a vanity publisher. Who was the, I wonder if it's the same publisher you published, Ben Shapiro's unreadable book. It says it was self-published on Wikipedia, but I wonder if they went through like a distributor

or something. Yeah. I think, I mean, they did to some extent, because Steven Seagal didn't figure out the Kindle layout himself. He didn't figure out how to like print it. They hired someone. It just wasn't probably a publisher did not say, we like this book. Here's money.

You know? Right. Yeah. He paid to have this published. Also, his hand on his jacket. Fifth power publishing LLC. Yeah. It's bad.

He's trying to figure out what, why he has this, he wants you to know he's packing. He's like, look at me. I'm a big shot. Yeah. His hands, his hands are. Wait, are you, I'm not going to jump ahead, but Robert, please tell me you're going to read some of these reviews of this book. Yeah.

We might, we might either start or end with that. I'm looking up his publisher right now, fifth public palace publishing. Well, they have a Facebook. Thank God. Let's see how their Facebook's doing. Um, 364 people like it, 372 people follow it. So, oh, and the most recent post is from 2018 and it's about the way of the shadow wolves. Yeah.

Of course. Of course. Yeah. And it, it says entertaining in the beginning, chilling in the end with a big dot, dot, dots in between both from, and it's credit to Amazon reviewer. Oh my God. Oh my God. That was Steven.

This is so good. Oh my God. It's amazing. So the, I, Shireen, we're having a tangent here because this is the last post. It's three years old, January 19th, 2018 was the last post from fifth palace announcing the publication of way of the shadow wolves. The only commenter on that post, which has 18 shares and 118 likes, one guy named Ron Johnson commented eight times.

All of his comments are in caps and I'm going to read his comments from top to bottom. Okay. Please. And again, these are in all caps. I'm not asking you for his phone number because I know you cannot do that. However, have him call my post one, post two, therefore I truly would appreciate it if you could contact my cousin and ask him to give me a call at my beach house in Smyrna, Florida. My home fun phone number is as fellows.

I think he meant to type follows and then he puts his phone number there. These are from a year ago. Okay. I hope he got help. Jesus. He keeps posting. He's talking. Tom also has a brother named Charles and a sister named Linda.

When I was a teenager, Tom was, what is this about? Oh, so he knows Tom Morrissey, I guess. My name is Ron Thompson. I am a suedo, S U E D O. I don't know what the fuck that means. Can I? Can I just like? This is baffling. Okay.

Yeah. I do want to say I don't, I just really may want to make sure people hear what actual publications said about this book. Like Vulture called it completely batshit insane. The Phoenix New Times called it garbage and breathtakingly bad. Hard to follow who's speaking, fight scenes that were even more boring than the dialogue. These are quotes from actual publications. Amazing.

Love it. So we're in for a real treat. Now I want to cover because I promised Sophie we would the back cover, which is not in my kindle. Oddly enough, where are you seeing the back cover? Cause it's not on my kindle. I will fucking send this to you both. Send that, send that shit into the, into the chat and we'll, we'll dig into this son of

a bitch. By the way, obviously we're doing a book episode because I don't have time to write as much as I would like to. So you can just, what are you going to do? What are you going to complain? You know, no, you're not going to go listen to come town, probably some of you. It's $15 on Amazon. This book that's come town, I only paid $2.99 for the kindle, but I'm just going to ask

to, um, the thing that we always do with these is you get it on kindle and then you immediately request a refund when you're done with the episode and it generally works pretty well. Love that for us. So. Yeah. The back cover is absurd. So, so, so Tom Morrisse's photo on the back crystal, we'll get to Stephen, but Tom Morrisse's photo on the back cover looks like they found a random photo on like a relative's Facebook

page from like a wedding and they were like, it's clearly a photo of him as it, it's clearly him at an event and they've just cropped his face and he doesn't realize he's being photographed. Like the photo of him on the back of this book is the moment of him realizing he's part of a larger photograph and he doesn't look happy about it and this is, this is the best photo they could find for the book that he wrote with Steven Seagal, um, absolutely incredible. So here's, here's, and the Steven Seagal photo is easily 25 years old. Like, yeah. This is the photo for Stephen is from the 90s.

Yes. Okay. And the bio is very funny. Yeah. I'm going to just read. I have to read the bios. You have to. Steven Seagal is an actor, producer, screenwriter, director, alleged rapist and human sex trafficker,

martial artist, sheriff, musician and international businessman, born in the USA with Mohawk heritage. He is passionate about restoring the constitution as the foundation for a republic and a return to responsible stewardship of Mother Earth such as practiced by the Native Americans. Tom Morrissey is a retired Chief Deputy US Marshal, martial artist, veteran of the US Army, musician, author, political leader and activist. He was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York to a blue collar family in a culturally diverse community. He can tell a good story about his dream of the return of his country's founding principles

with power back to the people. And there is a blurb on the back that's like a huge paragraph from Louis McKinney, former director of the US Marshal Service, the guys who've been assassinating people lately. Both that dude Winston Smith in Minneapolis and Michael Reinhold in Portland, the guys who, I don't know, probably tear gas me. I mean, I think I only got gassed by the Marshalls like a dozen times and shot with some musicians. Garrison got gassed by them more often.

There was a fun moment where they were shooting specifically at Garrison and he didn't realize it because he was so busy filming. Okay, as director of the US Marshal Service, I fully understood the challenges which face all law enforcement officers in their day to day activities. This is the story of a tribal police officer who stumbles onto one of the most notorious cases of all time in the Arizona desert. Although it is fiction, the story could have come from today's headlines. I know both of the authors and I know their law enforcement experience, which is evident

as they weave a tale of adventure, mystery, action, and betrayal. Steven Zagall is not only a master martial artist and film star, he's neither, but also is an experienced police officer. He is not. Tom Morrissey is a retired chief deputy US Marshal from Arizona who has intimate knowledge of the work in the local area. Together, they have written a book which had me feeling like I was back on the street protecting the citizens of this great nation.

So I have to, again, he was legally a law enforcement officer because he was deputized by Sheriff Joe Arpaio. Arizona Sheriff's. Who wrote the foreword. Who wrote the foreword. Yeah. Yeah. One of the things that has been done for years is Arizona Sheriff's will deputize any rich

person, like especially in rural Arizona, any rich person who's willing to spend like a week and or two a year pretending to be a sheriff's deputy. Is that like England nighting people? No, there's a real benefit to it, unlike being a nighting. If you are, if you are, if you basically get a sheriff's deputy to deputize you, even if you only do it once a year and you don't live in Arizona, you can then carry a concealed gun basically everywhere because cops can. Wow.

So that's why like rich dudes will do it is you get this, you basically get law enforcement rights to carry a gun any fucking place. So that's the kind of cop that Joe Arpaio or that, well, that Steven Zagala. So God, this has been quite quite the introduction to the way of the shadow wolves and the deep state and the hijacking of America. I want to read the dedication first so we can start after the break with Joe Arpaio. We dedicate this book to the Native Americans who are victims of genocide by the early invaders from Europe, to the tribal police who combine the old ways in the new to defend our border

with intelligence and integrity, to the US Marshals, most of whom represent the ideal of the Texas Rangers, who massacred indigenous people, whose, whose, whose job was to kill Native Americans. Yeah. That's amazing that you start with like, we, we recognize the Native American genocide. Also, you know, who's rad, the guys who did it. That's absurd. How does no one-

Fucking awesome. Oh, Steven. How are they that oblivious? It's, I don't know, man. Because they, they, their knowledge of history is based on four episodes of Walker, Texas Ranger and a statue of a guy with a cowboy hat. That's, that's their knowledge of history. Of course.

Of course. But you know who does understand history, Shireen. Raytheon? Oh, Shireen. You know, I think it was our friend of the pod, Benito Mussolini, who said that blood alone moves the wheels of history. And if anyone understands that, it's our sponsors at Raytheon and because the wheels of history need to keep moving, they make sure the blood keeps flowing.

That's the Raytheon guarantee, never an end to the bloodshed. So celebrate death with Raytheon. During the summer of 2020, some Americans suspected that the FBI had secretly infiltrated the racial justice demonstrations. And you know what? They were right. I'm Trevor Aronson and I'm hosting a new podcast series, Alphabet Boys. As the FBI sometimes, you gotta grab the little guy to go after the big guy.

Each season will take you inside an undercover investigation. In the first season of Alphabet Boys, we're revealing how the FBI spied on protesters in Denver. At the center of this story is a raspy-voiced, cigar-smoking man who drives a silver hearse. And inside his hearse was like a lot of guns. He's a shark. And not in the good and bad-ass way, he's a nasty shark. He was just waiting for me to set the date, the time, and then for sure he was trying

to get it to happen. Listen to Alphabet Boys on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Lance Bass and you may know me from a little band called InSync. What you may not know is that when I was 23, I traveled to Moscow to train to become the youngest person to go to space. And when I was there, as you can imagine, I heard some pretty wild stories. But there was this one that really stuck with me about a Soviet astronaut who found himself

stuck in space with no country to bring him down. It's 1991 and that man, Sergei Krekalev, is floating in orbit when he gets a message that down on Earth, his beloved country, the Soviet Union, is falling apart. And now he's left defending the Union's last outpost. This is the crazy story of the 313 days he spent in space, 313 days that changed the world. Listen to the last Soviet on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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Join me as we put forensic science on trial to discover what happens when a match isn't a match and when there's no science in CSI. How many people have to be wrongly convicted before they realize that this stuff's all bogus? It's all made up. Listen to CSI on trial on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Oh, we're back.

Unfortunately, yeah, celebrating death. Oh God. So after the forward where he says, remember the genocide of the natives and also the cool dudes who did it. There's this disclaimer. This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental. But always remember that the truth comes in many forms. Oh my gosh.

Oh man, I'm so on board. All right. Beforeward by Sheriff Joe Arpaio, who's police, who's sheriff's deputies in their prison, which committed a number of crimes against humanity, led women to have miscarriages by locking them in intolerable conditions without air conditioning, who beat and restrained mentally handicapped people, who then died in summer heat waves. Fucking hell. Like fucking concentrate.

He ran a concentration camp. Oh my God. Yeah. Real bad. We'll get to Joe Arpaio. Like I've been promising that for a while, but we really do need to. But anyway, here's the forward to his book. I strongly identify with this book because in many ways I lived with his portrait on

its pages. During my over 26 career in the DEA, I worked as a young agent in the mountains of Turkey, often on my own, chasing illegal drug merchants as part of the war on drugs. How'd that go, Joe? You guys win? Oh no, it was drugs. It was drugs that beat your ass, sorry. I had to work side by side with individuals who were actually sabotaging my efforts and

even putting my life in danger. Dude, if fucking people in the mountains of Turkey had wanted you dead, you wouldn't be alive. You weren't worth the trouble. Anyway, this was because they were on the payroll of the illicit drug underground. I was promoted to regional director of the DEA office in Mexico and Latin America. What I experienced during that time brought me an understanding of the mindset and customs of the drug cartels, which drive those organizations to this very day.

As the longest serving elected sheriff in Maricopa County, Arizona history, I brought my experience to that organization. Arizona today is, and has been, ground zero concerning illegal immigration and drug running. The deserts of this great state contain the hidden highways used by drug cartels as they pour across our unsecured borders. Wasn't your job to secure the border anyway? That flow has slowed under President Donald Trump, however there are powers known today as the deep state working against his efforts.

The activities of the deep state operatives are a grave danger to our country because they are working against the effort to secure our borders. It is my belief that books, such as this, bring a better understanding through fiction. This will help to bring it awakening, which has been smothered by the entrenched leftist mindset that dominates the creative media in this country today. I know and have worked with Steven Seagal, who is a law enforcement officer. You have to keep saying that because he's not. Along with being an international movie star, also not what Steven Seagal is.

He has an unusual understanding of the world in which this story takes place. During his time with my office, he proved his skills as a fugitive hunter when he arrested one of our top fugitives within 48 hours after beginning the search for him. He didn't really say anything in these things. He brought us a really effective way of getting the job done. You really can. I first met Tom Morrissey when he was a Chief U.S. Deputy U.S. Marshal for the Federal District of Arizona.

We came to be close allies and united our agencies as we fought the good fight against the evolving threat of illegal drugs that were moving through Arizona. Both of these men bring their experiences to life on the pages of this book. It is my hope that you have not only enjoyed the storyline of The Way of the Shadow Wolves, but you will also think about the message portrayed here. It is less than a hair's breadth from the frightening truth of what is actually happening today in America. Wow.

It's just like a Fox News wet dream. It really, really is. Here's the thing. I kind of suspect it might be a better book than Ben Shapiro's. There's not a zero chance possibility. Low bar. Yeah, low bar. It's literally the lowest bar possible.

If they don't cut randomly between viewpoint characters without telling you and make it clear like the basics of the passage of time, this will be a better book than true allegiance. I think that might be possible because what I will say, Ben Shapiro has never done anything but been Ben Shapiro. Both of these authors have gone out into the world and lived life. They've been terrible lives and they've left huge amounts of human shrapnel in their wake. But Stephen Segal has been out in the world. You can't take that from Stephen.

Again, been out in the world as a human sex trafficker, but been out in the world. I just think it's, sorry, I was kind of glossing over a few things on his Wikipedia page and I just have to mention this. I don't know if you mentioned it the first time, but he's had a lot of, along the lines of him being some good fighter or saving the fucking city or state of Arizona or anything, but he's had a lot of altercations and criticism of the stunt people he works with. In one instance, I have to read this out loud, in one instance- Oh, the guy who made him crap his pants?

Yes! Oh my God! Yeah, we did a two-parter on Stephen that we talked about this, but yeah. I'm glad that was part of it. I cannot, this guy has like a literal pile of shit on him. I can't believe this one person has all this shit. Yeah, he was a stuntman who was like an expert martial artist and Stephen was like, well, it's impossible to choke me out because of my Aikido skills and the guy was like, it's

not impossible to choke anyone out. Literally anyone can be choked out if you have a neck and Stephen was like, not me man, and then the guy choked him out and he shat his pants. Well, because Seagal said, literally, he said go and then so he choked him unconscious and then he lost control of his bowels. Like, what? Well, it's just such an unhinged joke. It's an unhinged thing to say because like anyone can be choked out if you have a throat.

Like I've done a fair amount of grappling. He says he was immune. Yeah, he said he claimed he was immune. Like who do you think you are? No one is immune. You have a throat. I mean, he does have a thick ass neck. So maybe he thought that was saying you're immune to bullets.

Like, you know what? Alex Jones might be immune to getting choked out because his neck is about as wide around as like a human torso. But Jesus Christ, not Stephen May ball. You said it man, not me. Yeah. He's got a massive neck. It's bizarre.

Anyway, I'm just I'm glad that you mentioned that in the last one. I just cannot get over all of these things like his, I don't know. Oh, yeah. You got to check out our two parter on Stephen Seagal, but we have to move in to the preface which is I think is just starting with it. It's it appears to be a multi pay. Well, it's a page and a half long rant about the deep state. What if the deep state is not as some strive to suggest unelected government officials

generally in the secret intelligence community in the military who run a muck outside the rule of law? What if abusive elements of the federal government are very much a part of the deep state, but they should be seen as the best of the servant class, not the masters? That's not a sentence. What if abusive evidence? The government very much, I have to diagram this sentence to you. We're doing this again.

Sorry. What if abusive elements of the federal government are very much a part of the deep state comma, but they should be seen as the best of the servant class dash, not the masters? Question mark. What is that saying? What's not a sentence? It's also the whole paragraph is nonsensical because he's saying, well, people say the deep state is unelected government officials acting outside of the rule of law.

But what if the deep state is really elements of the federal government being abusive? It's like, well, yeah, you're saying what if the deep state isn't government officials abusing the law, but it's instead government officials abusing the law? Yeah. Exactly. What? What a cyclical weird point to make. What do you think?

You know, Shireen, I'm a man who can admit when he's wrong, unlike Steven Seagal. I started this by saying this might be a better book than true allegiance. I no longer believe that. Wow. That's very big of you. Very big of you. I think I was just impressed by the writing quality that Joe Arpaio represented, which is leaps and bounds above this first paragraph of the preface.

I apologize. This is terrible. I mean, both of them have truly terrible front covers. Both of them have the most absurd front covers. Not sure which one is worse, the font on Ben Shapiro's? What is that? Yeah. What I'll give Ben Shapiro's, I think, is like competent bad airline fiction.

As in, if I didn't know who Ben Shapiro was, if I was just walking through an airport bookstore and I saw that cover alongside 20 other like James Patterson and whatever, it wouldn't stand out. I wouldn't be like, well, that's a particularly bad cover. I would be like, well, this looks like the kind of book you buy in an airport because your Kindle broke. I think the way of the shadow wolves, I would be like, the fuck is going on with this piece of shit.

Yeah. Well, Robert, how is his punctuation? Is he overusing the comma like Ben or what's the deal? So far, we're two sentences in and neither of them are legally sentences. So not great. Not great at all. Not great. What if the deep state was the deep state?

I am walking away impressed with Joe Arpaio's writing quality because he at least wrote proper sentences, broadly speaking. So second paragraph, what if the deep state begins with one of the world's largest churches and one of the world's most powerful families who control London Wall Street as well as the central bay? Okay. So we're getting Vatican and Rothschild conspiracies, I'm pretty sure. I wonder how much anti-cinematism in this because when you talk about the most powerful

families who control London and Wall Street and the central banks, you're talking about the Jews. That's like, not that they do, but that's what you are. If you're writing right wing fiction and you talk about the family that controls all of the banks, you're doing it. You're doing a racism. Even if you don't say the Jews, you're doing a racism. What if Governor's failed?

Sorry. Yeah. Just to go back to our hearty says last name, Arpaio, Joe Arpaio. So in the Phoenix New Times, they wrote a piece in 2018 that was like the nine most insane parts of Steven Seagal's novel, but part of it is that Joe Arpaio admitted he hasn't read it. Of course not. But in his forward, he made it seem like he did.

I love that. In his forward, he said, I can tell you as America's longest running sheriff that this book is absolutely accurate. And then he goes on. Why would I read this? Yeah. In this article, he goes on to say he's very busy. He's got a lot on his plate and it quotes, I've been busy doing a lot of things.

Things. I mean, I will say this. One of those things was apparently basic proofreading because Jesus Christ. I just had to mention that. I just think it's so crazy that someone not only like this, I would admit that multiple times. So here's the second part of the second paragraph. What if governments failed to nationalize the central banks, leaving the deep state

to be controlled by one of the world's largest churches and one of its most powerful families with their personally appointed agents throughout the world of finance? What if the greatest crimes against humanity occur at the banking level, where bankers are able to manipulate interest rates and foreign exchange rates, create billions in digital cash without backing, manufacture derivatives they sell to unwitting investors, and start wars to impact the price of oil and other commodities? What if beneath the bankers are political parties, generally two parties per country that conspire to exclude all other political parties and independence from power?

What if in the United States, one party controls 17% of the other of eligible voters and the other party controls 13% of eligible voters? What if another... Okay. So this is like sovereign citizen shit was like, yeah, I mean, fuck banks, but you're clearly saying bankers are controlling world government in like a racism way. And also your issue was not so much stuff like, I don't know, the IMF pushing austerity on countries that like primarily damages the global south and cuts support systems out

from under large numbers of poor people who have had resources stolen from them for decades by the West. You're talking about like they're not backed by the gold standard. That's your issue. Is that like, the Fed doesn't use the gold standard. You have no issue with like any of the actual fucked up shit that the international finance, whatever you want to call it does. Okay, so what if the mainstream media is a complicit partner with the banking, political

and intelligence communities? I wonder if Joe Arpaio said anything about, I don't know, when a bunch of journalists revealed the Panama Papers and how rich people were hiding trillions in wealth and then some of those journalists. One of them was killed with a car bomb. Not a word on that. It's just fake news colluding with the banks, which plenty of journalists are like establishment guys.

But like journalists died to reveal the kind of crimes that you clearly have no issue with because you're angry that we're not on the gold standard. You fucking weirdos. I do have one more tangent whenever you're ready for me to go into it, but I would love for you to continue. I just, okay. Oh wait. I can't.

Okay. I have to read this next paragraph first. Okay, please, please, please. The universities are also complicit in the deep state narrative. What if most history taught us a lie? What if few realized that the Pulitzer Prize was created to honor the man who invented yellow journalism, the original fake news in which massive lies were told in order to justify wars?

What if universities have refused for decades to actually study and publicize the true cost of specific policies, products and behaviors because they've been incentivized by commercial interest to overlook the fact that most of what the West produces is both wasteful and harmful to human health and the environment? Cool. Wow. Impressive reading, first of all. That was very impressive.

Yeah, yeah. And it's always like, again, what makes this, I guess, potential, I don't think this was effective propaganda. There's elements of truth in that, but also like, this is a guy who clearly thinks when he talks about universities not treating real history, he wants them to teach that Thomas Jefferson never repeatedly raped a child slave. Like, it's not that he wants them to teach, I don't know, about how the U.S. repeatedly intervened in Guatemala and backed death squads that resulted in the genocide of a quarter

of a million Maya and other indigenous people. It's not that he wants them to talk more about the Trail of Tears or talk more about the bombing of Cambodia. It's that history doesn't talk about how fucking rad Andrew Jackson was. Right. Right. Yeah. I mean, he's right about Pulitzer, who was kind of trash.

So again, so far it is more reasonable than Ben Shapiro's book. I will give it that. That's a lot to say after everything I've heard. Yeah. It just is ranting about like clearly stuff that like the way he frames it, you could interpret this in a way that's like not entirely wrong, but also it's clear by some of the things he says that number one, he's ranting about the Rothschilds largely. And number two, he's angry at the deep state for not for and like angry at the colleges

for talking about, you know, U.S. crimes against humanity and shit. Like it's it's it's nonsense stuff. It ends on the paragraph. What if this book is dedicated to the Constitution and the Republic with the answers to the proceeding be in some ways answered? No. Nothing that you've like you this is just a bunch of like weird you're he's repeating the same question over and over again.

He's not actually making any real statements and I guarantee you this book will not answer any of these questions. It's going to be about Steven Seagal shooting people to death now before we get into chapter one. Hit me. Okay. This is the same Phoenix New Times thing. So I read in the Wikipedia this is about like how jihadists were being like brought into

the state or whatever. So apparently one of the the the plan or like this the plot behind this is that Sharia law is apparently already here in the U.S. and the plan is that Obama is a secret Muslim. And then I have to read this one passage where they're fighting like the protests. Protagonist gets into a knife fight. Oh, fuck yeah. And he dips his blade at it. He dips his blade in pigs blood and then he sticks it in this Muslim bad guy and it says

how does that pig blood feel asshole is it starting to course through your veins. Maybe even my profit. Maybe even pissing off the profit. Oh my God. And then it continues. It says I have a special delivery from you from the profit. He laughs and then he does a deep stab into the Persians throat. This is a quote from the book killing him instantly.

He drops to the ground on his way to meet Allah. Oh my God. It's worse than I thought. Yeah. Calling him the Persian is really of course. Wow. This is amazing. There's so much in like I skipped over a lot of stuff but there is a lot of disgusting

things that he says about Muslims and I don't know. I didn't think it was this gross. It's amazing because like it's this it's based on like a really a base very basic misunderstanding of Islam which is that like because something is Haram it's like kryptonite to Muslims when in actuality the Prophet said you can if you're going to starve it's okay to eat pork to save your life or your family's life like I'm not we're not out of our mind it's like with Ramadan you can eat during Ramadan during the day if you're like fighting in a war and you need to in order to keep like if you're sick like it's not

an unre it's not like again he treats like a thing that's like hey it's best to avoid this which every religion has shit like that including whatever religion he follows and treats it like Muslims will explode if you touch them with pigs like I mean they all do it. Yeah. So coming up I had that reaction too just with like my peers like I'd go to a party and there'd be like alcohol there and even though I've had alcohol before they'd be like oh don't show this to Shari and are like there was pepperoni pizza or something it's

like oh this is Haram it's not halal it's just like because like that trickles down to people I think they're being funny. The second time I went to Iraq I smuggled a bunch of cooked bacon packages because my fixer my best friend over in Iraq really wanted to try bacon and hadn't had a chance to and like had no issues smuggling and also the drunkest I have ever been on a plane in my life has been Air Emirates and the guy pouring the drinks was a Muslim man who I don't believe had ever drank because of how he mixed the drinks but they were strong as fuck which is why I got why I vomited on an aircraft several times but I made it to the bank.

Wow. It was fine. It was fine. I guess you're in the mile high club now in a different way. The amazing thing about Air Emirates is you can just ask them for four double screwdrivers and they'll bring you all four at once they have they don't give a shit. It's amazing. Hey if you're paying that's all they care about.

Yeah that is all they give a shit about. It's fucking rad. Anyway I just love that like right wing thing where it's like yeah you know you guys as Christians there's shit in the Bible you do that the Bible says don't do it but we're seeing it even now though. Yeah. Like there are members of Congress and people like politicians saying terrible things about Muslims still to this current day like Elhan.

One of the megachurches I went to a megachurch as a kid that had an ATM which I'm pretty sure is money changing in a temple. I think in Jesus's eyes it would have been like well yeah that's you shouldn't be doing that in the fucking church. Wow. I mean the only time I assaulted people was over this. Wow. Anyway.

Anyway sorry I just needed to mention that. Right wingers. It's horrid and terrible and I just can't believe that's in a published book. I mean I can't believe that people are trash. Believe it. Yeah they sell bullets that have at least touched pig blood. Yeah. Wow.

Wow. From G-Vogue defensive ammunition piece through pork though it's not available anymore it was at some point this is looks like 2013. It's so weird to me because also Jewish people also can't eat pork. There's pig in the paint so they yeah Jewish people can't well anyone who buys these bullets would be happy shooting a Jewish person too. I guess that's fair to say. With G-Hog ammo you don't just kill an Islamist terrorist you also send him to hell.

That should give would be martyrs something to think about before they launch an attack. No that's not in the religion at all. That's not how it works bro. It's like you should avoid eating pork he didn't say if pig blood touches you you go to hell. Yeah. That would be I don't think Islam would exist as a religion if Mohammed had been like by the way if a pig touches you you go to you go to you go to the hell immediately.

God. Like people would be like okay this is kind of like what yeah sorry to go on this tangent I just yeah again. No but it's it's oh also it says that they might have plans for a sequel according to Morrissey. Fingers crossed fingers crossed the only way it could be better is if they brought in the musician Morrissey who might actually work with them on this and it's the musician Morrissey teaming up with Steven Seagal to fight that fall from grace.

Probably Antifa probably Antifa yeah probably Antifa probably Antifa yeah okay so chapter zero one we start with chapter zero one which in and of itself is kind of baffling actually you know we're going to start with before we get into chapter zero one Shirin. I'm not going to say Raytheon again I already did that joke but no no we already did Raytheon but there's other things that advertise on us you know it could be dick pills it could be dick pills machetes dangerous dietary supplements oh really it could be stuff that's basically speed because thanks to the state of Utah dietary supplements are effectively unregulated in the United States there's a lot of discount code for that yeah just

discount code your heart will explode because this is just uncut afedra okay let me write that down hold on yeah yeah your heart will explode because this is just uncut afedra um that's that's our discount code for 20% off what is effectively speed but it has a guy with muscles on the bottle so it's a you can trust it it's a yeah it's unregulated America America Joe Joe Arpaio's America during the summer of 2020 some Americans suspected that the FBI had secretly infiltrated the racial justice demonstrations and you know what they were right I'm Trevor Aronson and I'm hosting a new podcast series alphabet boys as the FBI sometimes you got to grab the little guy to go after the big guy each

season will take you inside an undercover investigation in the first season of alphabet boys we're revealing how the FBI spied on protesters in Denver at the center of this story is a raspy voiced cigar smoking man who drives a silver hearse and inside his hearts with like a lot of guns he's a shark and on the gun badass way and nasty sharks he was just waiting for me to set the date the time and then for sure he was trying to get it to heaven listen to alphabet boys on the iHeart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts I'm Lance Bass and you may know me from a little band called in sync what you may not know is that when I was 23 I traveled to Moscow to train to

become the youngest person to go to space and when I was there as you can imagine I heard some pretty wild stories but there was this one that really stuck with me about a Soviet astronaut who found himself stuck in space with no country to bring him down it's 1991 and that man Sergei Krekalev is floating in orbit when he gets a message that down on earth his beloved country the Soviet Union is falling apart and now he's left offending the Union's last outpost this is the crazy story of the 313 days he spent in space 313 days that changed the world listen to the last Soviet on the iHeart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts what if I told you that much of the forensic

science you see on shows like CSI isn't based on actual science the problem with forensic science in the criminal legal system today is that it's an awful lot of forensic and not an awful lot of science and the wrongly convicted pay a horrific price to death sentences in a life without parole my youngest I was incarcerated two days after her first birthday I'm Molly Herman join me as we put forensic science on trial to discover what happens when a match isn't a match and when there's no science in CSI how many people have to be wrongly convicted before they realize that this stuff's all bogus it's all made up listen to CSI on trial on the iHeart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts

all right so we're back and we're talking about the way of the shadow wolves chapter 01 tribal police America's frontline in the desert it starts in italics with the paragraph that's setting the scene so she means close your eyes close your eyes I want you to embody this world I want you to taste it and smell it and all all okay my eyes are closed okay my eyes okay okay this is my meditation for the day too I skipped meditation this morning in a darkened Arizona movie theater a somber male voice provides commentary over the native american chanting and drumming that plays in the background of a documentary film perhaps the great greatest morality play in american history is what occurred in the struggle between

indian tribes and those in the u.s. government who were hell bent on civilizing them throughout history the conquering of the land that once belonged to native american tribes which were actually nations in their own right by those who migrated here from other parts of the world was a legacy of cruelty and bloodshed so far he's not wrong he's not wrong I'm just expecting the other foot to shoot it right because again we know he thinks the texas rangers who helped to do this were rad as hell so yeah he talks about you know the forced relocations of 250 different tribes the trail of tears the bureau my eyes are still close by the way okay yes the government encouraged the creation of tribal constitutions

that of which came the tribal police departments within these departments was the genesis of the great trackers many of whom were shadow wolves I have to know before we make fun of this if this is a thing he's invented or if it's a real concept he's just butchering I really hope it's just some fiction bullshit because I can't oh no no this is a real emigrations and customs enforcement tactical patrol tactical unit it's part of ice they track smugglers through a to hono odum nation territory so it's an ice thing it's not like some native american no it's an ice it's an ice unit they're the first federal law enforcement agents allowed to operate on to hono land they are part of an a treaty with the to hono where

the u.s. government agreed that officers of this unit would have at least one fourth native american ancestry there's only like 15 of these dudes but this is a real thing I guess okay that's an actual this is an actual thing does that mean I can't make fun of it no I think we can make fun of Steven Seagal's coverage of it also okay 2020 the sonic the hedgehog film dr. Robotnik remarks that he learned his tracking skills from shadow wolves so there you go charene well famed famous shadow wolves dr. Robotnik and Steven Seagal this is a real thing it's a part of ice which makes me inherently suspicious but it's also the result of native americans getting a treaty with the government where they agreed if you'll

let feds on to your land will make sure they have indigenous ancestry so I don't know I'm not gonna that sounds like it's not my call it all but make so there you go yeah of course yeah it's a thing that happened yeah that happened yeah or is that exists the closing moments of the film arrive and the credit start to roll as the narrator continues native americans have an innate and powerful spiritual connection with the earth and its creatures and understanding of the true nature of all that is on this planet and how it works in the perfect balance of cause and effect an elite group within the native american communities known as shadow wolves are part of this perfect balance and are the best of the best with the ability

to see what can't be seen with the eyes they know without having to be taught they blend in easily with the night right from wrong is ingrained in their souls which makes them able to stand against evil no matter the cost so yeah that's what we're yeah that's what we're being led to believe I'm sure they're good at tracking you know and of course but like a long history of indigenous people tracking for the US and sometimes against like that there would be Apache trackers that would help the US government hunt down Apache bands because they probably had no other choice yeah I'm not I mean obviously that's too complex of history for us to just like that's true that happened there's certainly criticisms

of those guys absolutely but it happened and then there were native american code talkers Navajo code talkers in particular who helped during world war two because nobody in the axis understood what they were saying which I think is less problematic because you know the fucking nazis right so yeah whatever it's like this ice unit is part of a long tradition you could say a man sits alone quietly watching the film in the back of the darkened theater he stirs in his seat and comments to himself it's about time John Goad rises slowly from his seat so we're writing all this in present tense which is baffling a weird call to make he stirs and continues viewing as he backs up slowly making his way out of the theater

so he gets up from watching a movie and backs up out of walks backwards out of the movie theater yes they specifically let us know that he walks back out of the movie theater that's the end of chapter one wow this guy who is a John Goad is his his self insert shadow wolf character who is watching alone in a movie theater a movie about the thing that he is and then he then walks backwards out of the theater so he can watch the credits that's a baffling opening yeah really paints an image chapter two deep state in the desert oh god the arizona desert sky was full of color as the sunset and the spirit of the night began to stir the clouds a brilliant orange were hanging on the horizon with sun weight rays

lighting them from the bottom up as the daylight crept behind them oh my god what a sentence we have to diagram again I'm sorry the clouds comma a brilliant orange comma we're hanging on the horizon with sun rays lighting them from the bottom up as the daylight crept behind the mountains comma often the distance but not too far from where a man named to John Goad was standing period wow wow we're reaching Shapiro levels already I am well I'm very impressed so far can you remind me the protagonist's name one more time are they gonna always call him by his two names yes he has a longer name yeah there's a dust devil yet he out of this tall lean man who in the approaching darkness could easily have been a confused with this

saguaro cactus spent a lot of time in the arizona desert at night I've never confused a man for a saguaro but maybe at a great distance I guess I do want to say I just looked it up yeah the last name goad the origin is it's a name for a person who has performed good deeds in acts of kindness so definitely not Steven Segal human trafficker he's also tall and lean which Steven Segal certainly is not a lean man anyway yeah he's projecting aware is here yeah this is his self-insert for sure is that this is the ideal man he's going to be an ubermensch for sure he was fully aware of a man standing behind him about 80 feet away in the desert foliage at first that man seemed to be taking photos of the evening

desert that lay some 30 miles south of phoenix in less than 10 miles 10 seconds from Washington DC what at first that man seemed to be voting taking photos of the evening desert that lay for 30 miles south of phoenix in less than 10 seconds from DC how what that doesn't make any sense anyway the native maybe I guess he threw the internet or something like a smartphone I guess yeah sure the Native American John Nan Tan goad had classic chiseled features and was born and raised on the reservation which Steven Segal was not leaving it at age 18 and grad after graduating high school to join the United States Marines which Steven Segal also didn't do it was clear even in boot camp that he had something unique going

on that had its genesis in the words of his grandfather who had taught him the old ways starting when he was 13 years old I can't diagram all these sentences I just need you the listener to know none of them are legal sentences this book is a crime against grammar in a way that has already surpassed been Shapiro well again I couldn't have been more wrong when I said this might be better I was just shocked by the quality of Joe Arpaio's writing it takes it takes a very big person to admit they were wrong about two very horrible things I will say this Joe Arpaio hired someone who knew how to broadly speaking craft a sentence and Steven Segal and this Morrissey guy did not his spirit was totally connected to the

land he knew that when he walked this desert he was just stepping where many brave bold and sometimes naive men who preceded him once walked he could feel their energy and since their spirit with the ways things were playing out in their culture how they had been led down a path of total dependence on an elite group of politicians who were concerned only with absolute power nothing more nothing less he's thinking about a lot of weird shit he can hear what sounded like clicking behind him as the sound rode the desert air to his animal like ears what oh my god we get a real legless what do your elf eyes see moment yeah yeah there were others who had joined the man but there was no conversation accompanying

their arrival the one with the camera device used hand signals to it's just a camera you can just call it a kid we know what a camera it's not a okay used hand signals to communicate with them about 20 feet from where John was standing was a rise in the land he proceeded with what he was doing despite the action behind him moving slowly through it while shaking his fist in the air this was his grandfather's old ways method of bidding the son a good night and asking it to return in the morning as he was ceremonially dancing and chanting towards the rise he suddenly dropped to his knees there he began his shaman natured ritual celebrating the spirit of the wolf the dominant creature of the night as he chanted a shadowy

wolf slowly approached him out of the encroaching darkness kissed his forehead and stood there for a moment watching him I don't believe this is authentic in any way was that even a question man no no no I just I have to I have to state this because it one sec let's let's there's a question we have to ask Google because I do not come across this I want to know if Steven Seagal has any native ancestors I looked it up I looked it up and a lot of people just say he's claimed it and he's like he's definitely claimed it his petal grand parents were like yeah yeah he'd like made well he has Russian nation his paternal parents were Russian Jewish immigrants yeah his grandparents were Russian Jewish immigrants his mother had

English German and Irish and Dutch ancestry I don't think he's actually single evidence that he is Native American he's really tried to like sell it though there are multiple articles where like he has taken a reporter to like meet with the elders of the Mohawk tribe and like he's really trying to convince people there like he says like he's sweet he's a spiritual connection he's like the Rachel Dolezal of yeah I this is full of shit and I want to make it clear that I don't number one I would be surprised if any of these are actual indigenous rituals but even if they are we're not mocking indigenous rituals we're mocking Steven Seagal who is culturally appropriating something that is yes nothing

to do with him which is obviously if you're writing fiction you can write in indigenous characters and stuff like that like obviously you're not limited to just writing people who are in your ethnic group or religious group or whatever this is a bit different than that because he is this character is Steven Seagal doing indigenous magic that he claims he can do because he lies and says that this is actually him so again that's what's wrong here not wrong as an author to write about cultures other than your own and in fact but also like white washing shit yeah but like let's just say even if he does have some claim to that ancestry even if he even if this is bad right yeah but like he's purporting or like explaining

all these rituals and like his grandmother taught him this grandfather taught him that like that's definitely not true you know what I mean so everything he's saying to me is bullshit and his grandparents are Russian Jewish immigrants yeah exactly there's no way he understands that upbringing well and I have to this like he does this ritual and a wolf kisses him and it's like you know one of my favorite documentaries is a is grizzly man which is about this this white dude who like went to live with grizzly bears for years in the Alaskan wilderness and eventually they killed him and one of the things that Verner Herzog does that's very good as he talks to indigenous Alaskans about what do they think

of this guy they're like he was really reckless you don't we know you don't fuck with those animals they're number one very dangerous predators but number two by directly interacting with them you're endangering them because if they kill a person the government's going to want to kill that bear or whatever like all of this seems wrong to me is what I'm saying yeah yeah great documentary though yes great documentary after a moment the animal turned and looked at the men who had stopped dead in their tracks as they approached from behind the mysterious wolf's fierce eyes glared at them as they froze in place he then slowly turned his glance back to the need of kneeling native american kissing his forehead again

before disappearing back into the shadows to four kisses to forehead gave him two gives him two this wolf loves Steven Seagal John heard movement coming from what sounded like three men he got back to his feet and continued dancing his way into the darkness he went behind the rise where he was able to observe them but they could not see him he was a ghost warrior known as a shadow wolf third time we've had the shadow wolves explained to us here ghost warrior you need to three times explain a very basic point one you could easily blink with the night and then this is just a whole sentence disappeared to the darkness at will lacking a couple of things to make it actually a sentence wait when you already dance into

the darkness though yeah he keeps doing it he's dancing into the darkness he's also being so they're going after cartel guys it looks like here yeah and they're like apparently smuggling jihadists that's like the plot is that like yeah yeah but in this scene they're going after cartel supply lines and he's singing which I think actual indigenous trackers probably wouldn't sing while potentially going into dangerous territory with people who wanted to kill them that they were tracking they probably be like very quiet because it's silent anyway yeah I think in general if you track and hunt dangerous things you don't sing because it's you have to remind the people though that they're Native American characters with all these

rituals you just have yes how would we know they were if they weren't chanting yes okay so Jesus Christ as suddenly as so yeah he's he sees these these people who are I guess tracking John and he's tracking them and then they disappear when the wolf sees them he pulls a gun but they're already gone I thought that we had gotten them all but maybe I was wrong never underestimate the deep state was John's lingering thought we don't know actually who these guys are or what they're doing but apparently they're the deep state we learned right like it was unclear up to this point if they were part of his shadow wolf unit that he was moving through the desert with I don't know okay so a few days earlier things that started to

get strange when he began hearing from a confidential informant that there were black SUVs doing a lot of driving in the night out where nobody was then who reported it he mentioned that a young tribal member who might be of some help to him for a price John made it his business to find that person so he can get an idea of what he knew about the going Jesus Christ the big law man tracked him down at the casino where he worked part time as a gopher errand boy he quickly engaged the errand boy in Congress so we're just really more than we need to be explained here so he starts talking with this guy who saw the weird people John didn't have so okay come on man before you go acting like you don't believe me you want me to show

you where it's at you'll see what I'm talking about the range young Indian was ganglion of average height dark complexion with long black hair in a constant slightly hopeful smile he wore a black Billy jack style flat top cowboy hat in his early twenties he didn't light up the sky with his brilliance John didn't have to think much before taking him away he didn't light up the sky he made a point he's dumb he's dumb okay yeah okay so the tall man drives with him to the campsite where this kid saw some shit it was early afternoon when they got to the campsite John found an assortment of tire tracks indicating there was more than a little traffic running through there this was a remote area loaded

with snakes and scorpions despite sweet tooth that's the kid's nicknames claim of wanting to be alone it made no sense for him to be out there in the middle of the night alone but it made a lot of sense for the vehicles to be there it was simple maybe the cartel had a new corridor so this kid suspicious yada yada yada okay Jesus Christ John so okay so John asked the kid you know was he out here to find himself John asked not looking his way as he studied the tracks in the direction they were moving well he in while he spoke this was a common occurrence in the Arizona desert between the Mexican border in Phoenix something he thought extremely dangerous and if left unchecked could go Jesus Christ this

sentence this was a common occurrence in the Arizona desert between the Mexican border in Phoenix period something comma he thought comma extremely dangerous and comma if left unchecked comma could cause the eventual destruction of the United States not a sentence the deep state within the mainstream media kept the eyes of the country on the flood of illegals that were coming across the border they painted them as simple people in need of a better life it was a cunning distraction to take the eyes off the drugs that billionaire drug lords were pumping into the US John knew why it was working and saw it as collusion between the paid off media and the drug lords his sense was that that the then presidential

administration in Washington was using the media as their potent tool for forwarding their open borders agenda he felt that they were poisoning the minds of the many who drank up what they were spewing like thirsty nomads in a desert oasis what troubled John even more was that the country was asleep when it came to the otm's or other than Mexicans coming across a virtually open southern border into the country yeah trying to so other than Mexicans are coming into a symbol of jihadi caliphate that's what he calls it his spirit that they were already spread throughout the country yeah you remember when all of those jihadis came in through Mexico right yeah I remember that the thing that happened the thing we've

been warned about happening for fucking years we did it we should have built that wall you know yeah it's they've been warning like the right has been warning about a jihadi caliphate for fucking ever and like it just never nothing like it ever happened I mean it's just like one of those tactics that makes everyone fear every Muslim person they see like their Muslim neighbors and anything that'd be like oh they're part they're I mean I okay I don't know if I've ever said this on this podcast but I was working like two years ago in a production office and this boss I had that I had worked with the entire year she knew me very well she knew I was Syrian she knew I was raised Muslim we were we got into an argument about

Scarlett Johansson playing an Asian person and goes in the shell and her argument was all about like how you're an actor you can transform it to everything basically I was like my face was a little disgruntled and she was right across from me at the table and I was on my computer and she looks at me and sees my resting face which is I guess mad and yeah she's like oh oh she reads about to go jihad on us and the entire my god the entire last and I'm like this is not a stranger this is someone who knows me very well and I couldn't I didn't know what to say I was just like the only thing I can utter was that wasn't appropriate and then I was silent and I just kept laughing at being like you're

so PC or whatever um no that's not like a what the fuck I know I know and I couldn't really wow a lot of my income because I'm freelance was coming from this one person so I regret to have I never reported it because I was like I need yeah right now that's often how it works right is anyway my whole point is that everyone thinks every Muslim person is part of the jihad caliphate yeah for sure or they're like one step away from blowing up physically yeah yeah yeah it's um it's a good it's a good country shireen we're doing great anyway that's my little tangent he starts to build a connection with this kid who's into something sketchy and seems to be like he's young and he's dumb and he's on a bad path

and john nantan gode thinks about his own upbringing with his grandfather who taught him the ancient ways always in quotation marks when he says old ways are ancient ways it's always in quotation marks and he does it like every page uh he thought about the way he was guided and kept on the path by two people who cared about him and the way his life should be did sweet tooth have anything like that in his life my name is john gode john nantan gode he answered with a trace of sensitivity cool I like that you're this quiet guy who moves around like no one I have ever seen you are a res man and yet you ain't he had a curious expression on his face but he seemed sincere in a crude way how does a dude get himself

into a job like you got a dude gets himself a high school diploma for starters you got one of those so okay he's asking about how to be a cop the dialogue is just the worst um yeah so he and this kid he's he's he's he's mentoring this kid and then they talk he talks about a crime he saw it's probably the deep state black bagging somebody um okay there was a feeling about this place that disturbed john but he couldn't put his finger on what that feeling was it stirred something in his memory that made him feel uneasy though he couldn't quite get where it all came together it seemed to take him back to things his grandfather had warned him about when he was spending time learning from the old man again every page

or a minor that he learned things from his grandfather right um yeah he remembered being told the spirit of the snake in his bloodline and gave and that gave him power over some people and many snakes um okay I don't think that's how it works either um yeah so he has power over some people and most snakes it sounds like so that's good um that's a fun power to have uh okay so this just goes on and on and on um they have an encounter with a guy with a gun uh it looks like it's yeah okay here we go all right so um so he meets a uh okay he finds a uh a guy out in the desert uh with a gun and they have a little stand off um and then he finds the body of a Caucasian woman um her face was totally covered with

caked bloody dirt dirt and her teeth were all missing he realized that he most likely had them in his pocket um what what what wait how is that uh uh it must have missed a lot oh okay he finds teeth on the ground and he puts them in his pocket which is not a normal thing to do investigating a crime scene right you would want to leave yeah evidence but he puts them in his pocket then he finds a dead white woman who's been horribly brutalized uh and yeah he decides to keep this a secret until he's run a DNA test and dental records which again not great law enforcement stuff um so yeah he reports that he's found this body in the desert i'm gonna guess she was murdered by the deep state or the jihadists

because it's a white woman so it has to have been the jihadists um yeah of course yeah so that's good um yeah that seems to be uh where this god this is a long chapter and it's mostly just these repeated unnecessary conversations between this kid who we're supposed to see as the the the the guy he's mentoring um and uh and Steven Seagal's self-insert character um he does call csi and uh he does actually report the dead woman eventually so so that's good um i don't know he eventually does his job you mean he eventually does his job so that's the end of chapter one he thinks it has something to do with the deep state even though he's just found a dead woman in the desert but he's certain this is this has

something to do with the deep state um he couldn't shake the notion this could have something to do with the international deep state the hidden actors who played hard with the truth and understood the real game and its dark rules so that's the end of chapter two um if we ever come back to this chapter three star the title of chapter three is hot girl bad boys so you could be excited for that charene we're gonna miss that part okay yeah yeah i mean we're at an hour and 14 minutes we've talked about steven seagal for too much uh uh too long i mean it was fun i had a good time it was okay i mean fun is a stretch robert but yeah fun is a stretch tolerable is a stretch not me wanting to uh go off into the desert

and kiss a wolf uh is a stretch forehead kiss robert forehead kiss two forehead kisses that's amazing forehead kisses he just he wrote that right into a book and thought like this is gonna people are gonna this is gonna kill you know this is gonna be look at this cover i look like a badass yeah yeah people love it when i steven seagal totally real native american uh kiss get kissed by wolves because i'm just so in tune with nature and the wolves saved me from the deep state um anyway even even you saying that it's just funny to me it's it's nonsense like i said we may or may not come back to this we'll see how people like it it's i think worth at least getting into the bones of this nightmare story charene

i do want to say i apologize i didn't know we were talking about steven to seagal today until right when we were recording so i didn't listen to the other ones so if i repeated myself i apologize please don't come for me on reddit i'm afraid of all of you um people could always use a refresher on steven seagal and well um you know it's one of those things i think it was worth kind of covering everything around this book how it was marketed the forward i don't want to go through this chapter by chapter like we did with bin chapiro because for one thing it's super long and just interminable but we might if we come back we might do like a greatest hits where we actually go through those like most horrible points and you know

find articles about some good quotes you know and read the actual text of the very worst parts yeah that makes sense we could we could do a follow-up that way excerpt that i that i picked apart with the pig's blood thing as outrageous yeah so yeah so well well well figure something out um but right now i'm going to get a refund on this piece of shit because i don't want steven seagal and tom morrisey or whatever his fucking name is to get three dollars no please that's that is too much money for to be in either of their pockets i wish we knew like the profitability like a split between the two like how much how much goes to morrisey this book is not made a lot of money because like morrisey

didn't even get like a real headshot he got a cropped photo for facebook they were hoping this would do well and it did not because it's it's unreadable it's terrible it's it's one of the worst things i've ever read in my life uh it they love commas too it it compares poorly to true allegiance i mean i i didn't know you went through that whole book chapter by chapter that sounds like we did it was not it was a nightmare it took a really long time it was one of the worst things that ever happened to me and i had people try to kill me robert you know this is your show right like you can do whatever you want you just choose to hurt yourself you know what it's better than though is writing another five

thousand words which i just sometimes you need a motherfucker to chill out you just need to chill out sometimes that's not do everything in the world um and anyway so we talked about steven segal today and yeah i don't know about you but i am not in love with him i mean i definitely learned a lot about him today i wasn't aware just how fucked up he was as a human being so he's a monster he's one of the worst people who's ever who's ever lived uh for sure definitely one of the worst evens out there maybe the worst of the stevens yeah i would say so i don't know if there's other i'm sure there's a steven or two who helped do some genocides um yeah oh for sure yeah it's very colonizer's name i'm kidding sorry

to all stevens out there please i'm afraid of all of you um no this is anti-steven action now i'm kidding i'm kidding um but yeah thanks for having me on this um this this ride um i have nothing to say do you have any do you have do you have plugs do you have plugs fresh oh yeah yeah yeah so i'm shireen i'm sure you either hate me or love me if you're listening right now but uh i'm on twitter at shiro hero 666 and instagram at just shiro hero i co-host ethnically ambiguous body blah if you want to follow if you don't fine love that all right follow shiro hero you can find i have a fucking i have a fucking novel it's free so you don't have to pay anybody for it um and uh i don't know i forgot about that i it's definitely better than

the way of the shadow wolves i mean i forgot to congratulate you that you did that so congrats that's pretty cool man oh yeah i mean i did it a minute ago um but yeah it's out now you can find the uh the ebook it's being released you sequentially like sick i don't know a bunch of chapters will be out by the time you do this are you gonna do an audiobook yeah we have one out right now as a podcast if you go to after the revolution wherever you find podcasts you can also go to atrbook.com and get the e-pub it's free there's no ads go find it yeah just go nice there you go it's it's my book check it out uh tell me uh that i am the steven segal of fiction when all i've really wanted to be is the joe arpaio of fiction wouldn't that be such a hilarious uh discovery if people realize

that you like wrote like steven segal and you loved commas and stuff like that was the big i just love that was that was his big secret that was his big secret that Robert can't write i've been i've been the ghost writer for steven segal and then Shapiro all along um absolutely anyway this has been an episode of a podcast where we read a book uh next week we'll come back and we'll do another normal episode so chill out it's fine we don't do this every week but my god i'm do you get hate when you do these things no no actually people really like them most people there's always literally everything we do some subset of people will be like this was terrible and if you keep doing this i'm not going to watch it but traffic keeps going up so it's like well

whatever like you can't please everybody all the time especially when you're talking about we have like we're closing in on five million downloads a month here so um some people are not it's like it's whatever it's free you know next week there will be another two-parter and it's one of those things some people don't like episodes where we do talk about a doctor some people don't like the episodes where we talk about nazis some people are just like i'm here for the day it's like whatever tune in when we do the episodes you like or tune in every week it's all good i don't know everyone will always have an opinion you're not paying for the podcast so just enjoy it or not yeah same thing with guests people are like every single guest we have multiple people will say this is the

best person you should make them your permanent host and other people will say i would harm this person if i got the chance so yeah yeah yeah um what do they say opinions are like assholes everyone has three or something yeah exactly everyone has three assholes yeah famous thing that every single ass person every single person has but the book episodes seem to do really really well and like people like them so yeah i think they're a good like reprieve you know like a little light-hearted stuff i don't know i hope this is light-hearted i mean at the very least you could imagine steven seagull getting a fucking forehead kiss from a wolf twice like he sure did he sure did and what the the thing that is really heartbreaking about this is um

there would have there was a chance that if this had done well we would have gotten away of the shadow wolves movie where steven seagull had to play a tall live native american tracker getting kissed in the forehead by a wolf and and fighting the funniest thing in the world because yeah it really barely move now he can barely move you watch him in his action movies he just sort of stumbles in holding a gun and just stands there because again he can barely move um it's amazing i mean so if he brought up a good point that oh wait was it someone i don't remember who said this but like he was already old when he started his acting career you know action star he was he was not a good action star yeah so he's mobbed up is why people think he got

a career in the first place right is that it was like a running laundry thing um but i would love what i actually would would want most is for steven seagull to play brett hawthorne in the movie about true allegiance been sure you're a self-insert character but everyone else to be like his wife to be a young woman like she's described in the book all the terrorists to be like these these terrifying like tactical operators and stuff and just steven seagull having to fight his way through them pretending to be the youngest general in u.s. histories he wheezes his way through action scenes wheezes i want that so bad crossover of a century really like fox news would love it do it do it you cowards all right well thanks for having me and the episode is over bloody cloth

alphabet boys is a new podcast series that goes inside undercover investigations in the first season we're diving into an fbi investigation of the 2020 protests it involves a cigar smoking mystery man who drives a silver hearse and inside his hearse was like a lot of guns but our federal agents catching bad guys or creating them he was just waiting for me to set the date the time and then for sure he was trying to get it to happen listen to alphabet boys on the i heart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast what if i told you that much of the forensic science you see on shows like csi isn't based on actual science and the wrongly convicted pay a horrific price two death sentences and a life without parole my youngest i was incarcerated two

days after her first birthday listen to csi on trial on the i heart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts did you know lance bass is a russian trained astronaut that he went through training in a secret facility outside moscow hoping to become the youngest person to go to space well i ought to know because i'm lance bass and i'm hosting a new podcast that tells my crazy story and an even crazier story about a russian astronaut who found himself stuck in space with no country to bring him down with the soviet union collapsing around him he orbited the earth for 313 days that changed the world listen to the last soviet on the i heart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts