Bein' Ian With Jordan - Ab*rtion Party W/ Underoath & Lizzy Cassidy | Bein' Ian with Jordan Episode #165

Episode Date: September 24, 2025

In another BANGER ep, hardcore's favorite boy & fan fave Lizzy Cassidy are joined by the legendary Grant Brandell & Aaron Gillespie of UNDEROATH! The gang talks favorite moments in emo/metal/ska history, Ian's Naughty List, & the band learns what a goon sesh is. Plus, one of the best ad reads in the history of the show. Sub to the Patreon for early episode access and bonus Patreon only episodes/content: https://www.patreon.com/BeinIanpod IAN FIDANCE | WILD HAPPY & FREE | FULL STAND UP SPECIAL: https://youtube.com/watch?v=-30PenMy1O8 JORDAN JENSEN | DEATH CHUNK: https://youtube.com/watch?v=ytsilX-QL3s&t=2s Podcast Merch Here!: https://www.coldcutsmerch.com/collections/bein-ian-with-jordan-podcast -Support the show and shop SKIMS Mens at https://www.skims.com/ian #skimspartner -Support the show and get 10 FREE MEALS from Hello Fresh! Go to HelloFresh.com/SKA10FM -Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/jy7kvwno #CashAppPod As a Cash App partner, I may earn a commission when you sign up for a Cash App account. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Visit https://www.cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. #CashAppPartner Follow Jordan Jensen: @jordanjensenlolstop https://instagram.com/jordanjensenlolstop See Jordan Live! - https://punchup.live/jordanjensen Follow Ian on Twitter, Twitch, and Instagram: @ianimal69 https://instagram.com/ianimal69/ See Ian Live! - https://punchup.live/ianfidance Follow UNDEROATH here: https://www.instagram.com/underoathband/ Buy UNDEROATH's new album The Place After This One here: https://underoath777.com/ See UNDEROATH on tour! - https://underoath777.com/pages/tour Please RATE, REVIEW, and SUBSCRIBE to Bein Ian with Jordan on all platforms! Produced by: James Webb https://instagram.com/thechicagopro/ Intro song: “Bein Ian with Jordan” by Wesley Schultz and Ian Fidance Outro song: Title Holder “It Doesn’t Matter” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Telling jokes and having smokes Riding bikes all through the night It's a wild ride When you're being in Coffee ice no matter what Now you know he likes it in the butt It's a wild ride When you're being in

Being in Life is shit with you're positive Let's find out what it's like to live Alive Being in Being Ian With Jordan Hey

That's for you, Patrick Stump Welcome back to another episode of Where did you get Where did you get tasers? Did you buy that? Ohio Yeah You almost burned her fucking hair off

Oh, if I wanted to, I would have. It's fake. It's all fake hair. Burn it off. It's a wig? No, it's like the bottom's fake. Extensions. Oh, it's extension. Really?

Yeah. Looks great. Thank you so much. The gluens. The gluens. Thank you for asking. Yeah, that's great. You'll see you.

She starts patting her hand. Yeah, I do. I sure do. I sleep in a bonnet and everything. Dude, before I knew about black hair when I was teaching years and years ago, which is my favorite way to start any sense. I was teaching and there was a girl that had a weave, and she was patting her head to scratch it

And I thought she was having a mental health crisis And I was like is everything all right Or she had like That was her response I'm black motherfucker That's my favorite response She didn't say my head itches She just I'm black

Oh Totally sorry And I was like yeah What are you a taking back Sunday album Because you're louder now Dude Anyway so you guys I can't believe I said Patrick some kiss my ass.

I don't mean it that way. No. No, no, no, no. But you, you ribbed me, and so I had to rib someone back, and I had nothing yet to rib you back about. And he got astray. When you think of a barb for me. You caught me with both dicks in my hands.

Let me know. I think he's good. He's on his pile of Disney, Spidey, Spider-Man Money. Yeah. He's good. He's looking down all of us right now. He's up there, fucking. He's up there fucking.

What do you do? You got Disney cash. What do you do? I mean, like, what's a Wednesday morning, look like for Patrick Stump. Turn your house into the palace from Aladdin. Billowy Pits. Billowy pants.

He buys the blank check house. That's what he needs. Dude, I rewatch that recently. You did. Is that weird? I rewatch a blank check. By yourself? Yeah.

Who's the, no, I wasn't by myself. Is Sinbad in that? No. Who's the comedian in that? The old guy, the older comedian in there. yeah there's a guy in there's in black blank check yeah it's in bed house guest black check why are you doing that why are you doing that it's a black check motherfucker um what no maybe there

there wasn't a comic no you're thinking of house guest was simbad everybody thinks it's all in shazam but that was fake that was an alternate reality oh yeah that's the uh what they call Yeah. Yeah. Whatever happened? We're somebody at today. He's, like, very ill. Really?

Is he actually? Oh, really? No joke. Yeah, yeah. It's the saddest thing ever. He's one of the greatest comedians of all times. So funny. Yeah.

He was, like, hospital ill, like he's dying? Yeah. Damn. Welcome back to another episode of Beating with Jordan, everybody. Jordan is out of town. She is on the road promoting her special. Take me with you on Netflix out now. But I've got the dream.

team here with me, the very funny Lizzie Cassidy, and it is an honor, and I am so excited to have the absolute, absolute legend, the absolute legends in the house, Aaron and Grant from Underroth. Thanks for having us. Thank you for coming, guys. So excited to be here, dude. Yeah? I'm fucking pumped.

I'm excited you guys are here. Yeah. We got coffee. We had a neighborhood hang. We did. And we learned a little thing about Granny poo. You have cats and you hate it. A cat.

A cat. Explain. You have a cat and you hate it. Explain. Came with a marriage, man. He's one of those things. You just got to have a step cat. Yeah, step cat, sure.

Let's back it up, though. Grant, can you do some favor and back that ass up? Let's go. The wife doesn't even like the fucking cat. Why don't you explain the whole thing? You inherited a step cat that she's allergic to and you're allergic to. We also, so I had a dog, the Boston Terrier, and she had the cat. So we got married, and I found out,

bit so i kind of had to like bring my game she brought hers squared off we're good found out she's allergic which she's just been taking allergy pills for her life forever i was like okay that's your deal allergic to the cat allergic to the cat which i am as well i did cat when i was little it was an outdoor cat right which i don't know if you were having of those they bring like rats and stuff to your house it's kind of weird um their presence yes exactly sure they love you straight up they bring you like a dead ass bird or a squirrel yeah yeah that one here's that squirrel Dude, my little guys upstairs, they have these toys, and I'll play with them, and they'll put it in their mouth, and then they'll trot to my room, and they leave them on my bed.

That's for you. It's so cute. I don't want to offend you, but I despise cats. Like, I do not like them. All of them, everyone? Yes. Toronto, JFL Toronto, September 26th, 27th, comedy bar, me. Let's sell it out.

We're almost there. Buy the tickets. Eiffonfinance.com. And then I'm going on the road with Bert Kreisher for the, permission to party tour doing red rocks that's cool umaha tulsa houston edmonton new comedy festival skank fest dc dc minneapolis vancouver end of the year in san diego and get tickets for 2026 for denver connecticut uh emo's not dead crews baltimore maryland add in dates all the time emfinance dot com i'll see you out there on the road watch jordan's special take me with you

on netflix punchup dot live slash jordan jens for her dates bye bye i think it's just a uh of here comes get that ass so my my when i was like younger my cat was my sister's cat you i love cats they're the best thank you have you ever done it to yourself uh-huh we'll do that at the end you can do it at the end really no no i'm not doing that come off no i'll do it right now it's the morning dude yeah i know i totally just wake up this is what i do coffee taste so i come down in a robe and i'm like How bad is it hurt? Be honest.

It's really not that bad. You want me to do it? Is it weird or? No, I don't want you to do it. I don't want you to do it a tour of somebody? Dude, let's all. That was me. Trust fall exercise.

I'm not doing the taser. Let's all tasers. I'm not teasing. I'm not doing the teaser. Why? I don't know if I can do it to my. I don't know if my brain would let me do it to myself. Oh, your brain will let you.

Trust me. Oh, yeah. It's good. It's good. It's good. it's good it's good that's like the smelling salt the juice is flowing it's the smelling sauce thing that all the everybody in austin's doing in austin you got to smell salt it's horrible and down here you got to taste yourself and also say slurs i'll go first dude it's awful the smelling sauce

they got them before all the comedians were on them and we had them on the road yeah i play hockey so it's like that's really yeah oh yeah on the bench you just are you a bruiser Is that what they're called? A bruiser? What are they talking about? I think it works. Are you a goon? A goon?

You're just saying words. I don't know what you're saying. I'm a nice guy. Is it goon jerk off now? What are you talking about? Goon. It doesn't mean, yes. Thank you.

Gooning means you jerk. Not again. Not again. In hockey, a goon is like a big guy. Enforcer. Can we rewind for a second? Gooning, you jerk off for a while? What does that mean?

I think a gooner is a guy who jerks off too much. What did you say a while? No, a goon sesh is Oh, I understand. You take like four or five hours And you just like rip it And you take your Auto Blow

What's hanging Helps you goon It was just a cat toy Hanging from the mouth of an auto blow Have you used this? No What's happening in this house? Glenn

Wait, can I ask why that Wait, I do like cats Well, why are the cat toys attached to the auto blow? Well, I needed somewhere to hold them. Have you used that thing before? Like a vase. Everyone's so amazed. I've never used it. I've never used it.

Everyone's so amazed. Famous pervert never used the auto. Wait, did you pay for that or is it a deal? It's a deal. They gave it to us. And you plugged it? Oh, it's lips. But they no longer, I don't think they sponsored the pot anymore.

Oh, no way. I'd rather Absolutely not Absolutely not Would rather get the taser thrown at me Than the auto blow It's good right It's got to wait to it

Yeah She's got a voice Oh she's singing Let her speak Yeah So my favorite part about this Is you just When you finish

You open the top And just put it in the fucking dishwasher What do you do? My favorite part of it is When you finish It doesn't talk Oh hey Now for real

Are you Are you supposed to clean this? Huh? Are you supposed to clean it? Of course. Yeah. You can't not clean it. It's full of come.

Yeah. What do you think you just leave your cum in there, Aaron? No, there's a... It's not even closed, though. It just drips out the bottom. For easier clean-up? Does that go all the way through? Yes.

That goes on to another man's mouth. Another man's... So, anyway, they caught the killer, Charlie Kirk. Can you imagine? We figured it out This is how people find out This is what people see when I'm on podcast Jesus Christ

Actually that fake hair looks pretty good right now You can have some if you need it I do Do you have a backup? I got some backup yeah So gooning is a long Sesh where you have like a mantra Almost

Yeah Like TM jerk off Transcendental Gunes TM jerk off. TMJ. TMG. TMG.

TMG. TMG. Yeah. So people gooon. They use that. I've never been a gooner. Four or five hours is what you led with, which is what. You're going to wear a hole in that thing.

You're going to wear a hole in that dick. Yeah. Especially if you go no loo. You ever had a boner for four hours? Brother. From the pill. Bluechu. Brother.

Let me tell you. It doesn't give you a bono for four hours, but it gives you the ability to have it. Is Scott really the promo code? Oh, is that great? Yeah. Skaw people don't have sex. Come on. What?

Whoa. Hey. I'm a ska guy. You know this. Yes, you are a ska guy. Tell me your ska story. That's how I started music. I was in a sky.

I played saxophone. No way. For like 10 years. What bands were you in? Oh, nothing you would know. Like shitty little bands. Try me. No.

Trust me. You would not. I will say, I will say my first like real show. we opened up for mustard plug in MU 330, which was so sick. I love. I was like 16. So much. Jeez, rocket fuel.

Oh, yeah. Now I'm rich. I was that the other day. What's that? I listened to that album the other day. Really? It's so good.

Chops on Parade is an amazing album. I hate this. Press. Oh, my God. You listen to the other day? Who's your love? Who's your love? Shout out Dan Potthas and MU330, one of my favorite scotters.

You know they're on a first name basis with these? people? Yes, I am, Aaron. You're like the ambassador of Ska. I have a ring that says Ska. They're sick. Super good guys, man. For being like 16, come to a show, they were so night. Oh, I bet. Just for me, because I can't remember.

What was the name of your band? Point blank was the name of our name. Yeah. We had one unreleased demo. What if he ran upstairs and had a shirt? I mean, they had a 7-inch and also a record. I'd be so. Oh, sick, dude.

Dick jokes. Awesome, dude. Fucking heavy dick joking. Come on. That's great. So how long did you play in a ska band? Through high school, pretty much. I literally went from ska to creed rock to under oath.

What was the creed rock? Morning son. No. No. Morning son. M-O-U-R. Very Christian. That rules.

Yes. That's great. I was also on the Christian scene, so it was hard. I was into Christian punk rock. and Christian Scott Christian Scott Five Iron Frenzy Supertones

So good What was the weird one That you are the devil And the devil is bad Hey you are the devil And the devil is bad Oh that's The WU's

You ever heard that shit Yeah Dude you're blowing my mind Right now I want to listen to them I know more about Skah Than you dude Fuck off

Don't you dare You're Take it back Oh he's ready to go You are Scott Lord Thank you No there was this band called the Ws

And I saw them Everyone thought it was They were more like swing. They were. That gave a swing vibe. Yeah. You all. Yeah.

That was when like Brian Sessor was blowing up. What was the really weird swing band that had like cherry pop and daddy's? Oh, that's the weird. The videos were weird name for a band. For sure. Back then people got away with murder. Yeah, literally it was easier to get away with murder. Yeah.

Dude, we were reading. I do this thing's called reading sometimes where I dramatically read. radically read like a menu or a lyric. Oh, I thought you were joking about reading. I was like, I need to get back into that. I do these things called reading sometimes. I like, Aaron, do it reading. And it'll be like a steakhouse.

And I'm like, Onion Tower, whatever. But the other day, we're on tour with Risenk, and a band, they opened for, a band open for the band, a band,

I don't give a shit. I just can't remember. Like one of the but 90s butt rock bands. Cowboy mouth. No, that's what. Oh, there was, oh, uh,

God. It wasn't track because he were making fun of the track. Not trapped. Cether. No. No.

Saliva. Three days. You're right around it. Three doors down. You're right around it. I almost shit my pants. No, anyway,

the lyrics of this song were... You literally looks like you were... So I stood up. I stood up and did a reading of this song. And Tim from Rized against was like, I couldn't believe this band. Like in the shit they were saying. It just was cool.

Like, their biggest song, This band's biggest song I swear I would drop it I just can't remember the name was the second verse starts with I hate when a girl's underage and you can't tell Like

Who are these I got to think of these profits If you're into that What do you want to be able to tell? Yes Yes Okay well Why did you know that off the bat

Oh you looked it up How did you Google it that fast though? But he just said the word Do you have your phone? Can I have your phone? I want to do a reading of this list. Yeah, could you do one of our readings? Yeah.

One of your famous readings? This band hasn't been canceled for this. Well, I don't think band should be canceled for the lyrics. I want to read this too. Here goes our tour. Okay. How is this? If this was written right now,

there's just no world. I mean, we would never write lyrics. Can I be honest? Whoa, you got, we have some pre-me lyrics that are wild. So sick of the hobos. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Let me set it up. I don't know what you're talking about.

If you could, like, do a reading of these lyrics. I think I get a better understanding. You need a clip. Yeah. Oh. Can you stand, though? I'd like to say that I don't endorse these lyrics. Can you use, hold on.

Let me fix this microphone for you. I can't do both. So sick of the hobos always begging for change. I don't like how I got to work. And they just sit around and get paid. Oh, man. I hate all the people. who can't drive their cars.

Bitch, you better get out of the way before I start falling apart. I hate how my wife is always up my ass. All right. She always wants to buy new things, but I don't have the cash. That's verse one. Yeah, but that also makes sense.

Chorus one. I hate my job, all of my rich friends. Relatable. I hate everyone to the bitter end. True. Nothing turns out right. There's no end in sight. I hate my life.

How come I never get. late. Nice guys always lose. Fair enough. Okay. How could she have a little odd? This is my favorite part. How could she have another headache? That's always some kind of excuse. Awesome. I mean, these sound like they were written on a bullet. I still hate

I still hate my job. My boss is a dick. I don't get paid nearly enough to put up with all your shit in the final stanza. I hate that I can't tell when a girl's underage. You know, I tell her she's a nice piece of ass.

Then her daddy punches me in the face. I mean, there's no excuse ever for violence. So if you're pissed like me, bitches, here's what you got to do. Please let us know. Put your middle fingers up in the air. Go on and say, fuck you. Wow. Wow.

Those are lyrics I wish I had on my senior quote in high school. How was it? That really changed my mind about a lot of stuff. Guess when this song was written and released? 2023. 2008. Really? That's makes sense.

Who is this band? Theory of a dead man. Exactly. Right. Who gives this shit? Dude, that was a huge song apparently. Was it? Yeah, what?

Did you read the chorus? You know the chorus, you hear it. How does the chorus go? I don't know the tune. How does the chorus go? Can we get like a, can we just get like a, it'll probably take it down. Yeah, they'll probably take it down.

Yeah. A better time. Wow. What's this? Oh, that's this. Those are the spoons. Dude, no one's listening to this. Fuck off.

This was a huge band. This was huge. When did this come out? 2008. I was in rehab. So maybe they didn't get to me. I was safe from now. I wasn't in rehab until 2009.

Nice guys always lose song like that is so bone-chillingly, not hot. Oh, yeah, yeah. Nice guys always lose. My life story there. Like with a handbone. Nice guys always lose. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just in my room, belting it.

I bought you dinner and now you won't touch it. You fucking bitch. Like, what a loser. Good music. Yeah. It's crazy. It's my favorite song, but it's crazy. Now, you guys should cover that.

Scott. Have you ever thought about doing an under. wrote ska because that would be dude doom scah hard ska scah scah core scah hard scah explain didn't i text you i'm just reading my bank pass record and say we should put like a tuba in a song or something like that like can we make that cool somehow all jokes aside i think like a distorted saxophone in like a bridge of a song would be sick yeah i'm not fucking around yeah yeah yeah like like who's done it like the 1975 has sacks and stuff like that like but that's not scah we got to get the up the updates

The upbees are what I hate the most about Scott. What? Why? Five Iron Frenzy, Upeats and Beatdowns. Go ahead. I saw a video. One of my favorite albums, by the way. Incredible.

I did see a video the other day of, uh, d-dun, dun, dun, dun dun dun da da, da, Supertoe strike back to blubber. Music harder.

And I, and I woke up the next morning. I don't I, I don't I, I woke up the next morning and saw you on my schedule. I was like, Oh, we'll talk about that. Oh, of course.

Yeah. Yeah. It's a beautiful morning. Dude, I, there was a class in high school called Christian Scriptures. Shout out, Mrs. Weber. You come to my shows and I'm in Nashville. I love you and your family. You're in Nashville?

No, when I play Nashville, that's where she lives now. From Delaware, 302 through and through. But, uh... It's short and it rhymes. Keep going. Thank you. I love that no one's stopping my finger. I would bring Christian Skobans and play their songs as prayer

And print out the sheets and make everyone read the lyrics in my Christian scripture class Every New Day by Five Iron Frenzy Big Time prayer for me Were other kids mean to you? Huh? That's crazy to do in high school So when I was in high school playing saxophone I was like, I do like all state, you know, all county, whatever competitions.

And I had a, I had a private instructor. Can you talk real quick? What is, what is this? You were in a competition for sacks? Yeah, like I was in band in school. Oh, okay, sorry. So you have like, all counties, solos and I envisioned it was like two, two people on stage and you got,

and the other guy goes, do, whoa, and you're like. Like a jacked like the jabberwockies, but of music. So anyways, this lady, she was, I forget her name. This is forever ago, but she used to play for Aretha Franklin. She was, your teacher, a teacher used to play with Aretha Franklin. She was like, top, top tier. I'm in high school. I'm at like 16.

No, I mean now. Now, I'm 43, 44 this month. I am, by the way. I took a deferral. I wanted this day. Anyways, I would bring. I'd bring, we'd go to lessons and I have like classical stuff and whatever. And then I'd bring like 500 frenzy songs.

And I was like, can you help me learn this? This scoff art. And she must have been so bummed. Like, this is, like, the most generic stuff ever to what I play. Oh, because she plays a classic, like jazz. Yeah. Where's Kenny G. I right now.

That motherfucker in his hair. He's with Patrick Stove. They're both in a mansion together. Kenny G. And Patrick Stubb are in a Disney mansion. Suck my balls, Patrick Stubb and Kenny G. Fuck you. You heard it here first.

I never said suck my balls. Oh. Oh, no, I thought it died. What? I never meant that bad. I feel bad about Patrick Stumpkin. Wait, so wait, how old are you? I'll be 44 this month.

Really? Yep. And you're 42. Yeah. So I graduated. You just turned. Congrats. Thank you.

Yeah, I was in a Skoban and two. What? A weird thing. You made it. Congrats on being like old and shitty. No, you just turned 40. That's a thing. Congrats.

Is that what people say? Is that what people say? Yeah, it's all shit from here, brother. Is that not a thing to say when someone says I just turned an age? I think it's okay. No, it's like, if you turn 21, congrats. 18, congrats. 40, congrats.

But like 42, you made it. You're still, you're still breathing. Stopping your sleep. Good job. Truck on, brother. Truck on. Yeah, yeah, keep trucking, brother. You have to swallow a handful of something you shouldn't.

Good job. I meant pills, by the way. What else could you have meant? I've done both. What's the other thing? I'll do it. We know you. Just let me know and I'll do it.

I too can help. What you're going to call it? So, wait, so how'd you go from being in a ska band to being in a butt rock band? It wasn't that butt rock. Yeah, it wasn't that bad. But when I was in my Christian Scott man, our bass player, so we found out he's selling weed. No, no, no, no.

Not Christian. I didn't know this. This is sickest fuck. So he got the boot. And I was like, kicked him out for smoking weed? For selling weed, yeah. Because that goes against God.

I'm sure he smoked too, yeah. Right? Of course, yeah. Of course. It's not in the Bible. Oh, dude, it's fine to smoke fucking weed. You can sell weed. This is, uh,

1998 so yeah um yeah anyways so i was like i'll play bass and i just picked up a base got one for christmas and taught myself and you've known each other for 25 years i didn't know this story now i'm the same level i was then we're still going dude don't speak tomorrow i catch it out what was the conversation like when you kicked out like your boy for selling drugs because it wasn't my boy he was just a guy i knew for like three months and i was like yeah dude no we're good yeah we were all raised pretty fucking and sheltered. Really?

Not like. Did you all grow up together? No. No. No, we didn't meet until we were like 18. How'd you all link up? Local scene. Local, like the local Tampa, like where we're from Tampa St. Petersburg.

Right. That area. The scene back then was for, at least where we grew up, was very interesting because it would be like a show. It would be like a shoe glaze, scoban, black metal, punk band, all in the same show. Yeah, yeah. And everybody knew everybody. Yeah.

And it was like all pretty. much Christian, like one management company. There was a place in St. Petersburg called The Refuge. It was a homeless shelter. Uh-huh. And on the weekends, they would do shows. Yeah. And everyone, like, everyone has played there.

Yeah. Like, straight up, like. Green Day, blink. Like, like. I'm talking about a place of size of your apartment. Yeah. Like, not. So everyone, and there was.

Beautiful place. There was. Your apartment made. I love you. Your apartment makes it look like Kenny G's house. Thank you. I mean, the other way around. Hold on.

Shit. That place made your apartment look like Kenny Jesus No, so it just mixed bag of bands all the time That's how we all got connected I love mixed bills shows They don't happen now They don't happen anymore We're on tour with Papa Roach and Rise Against right now

And we're like the odd man out And we can feel it Really? Yes Like with a crowd you can feel it You used to not be it back when we were coming up It wasn't like that Yeah And no disrespect to either band

They're the best people ever But like their crowd it does not Really no But dude that was what was so cool That's why we're on the tour We need a new crowd At the at the Mix Bill show was like, we would have hardcore kids like going off for our ska band

and then like ska kids like skacking in the pits. That's how it was. And it was like crazy and fun. And like sometimes there'd be fights and stuff. But it's like, you know, like at squash or whatever. But I felt like those shows were the most fun. It's like with comedy. You don't want like everyone saying the same fucking thing on the show.

You want like, you know, like I love when bands bring out different acts. to open for them so you get kind of a variety. That's, you know. We try to do that when we, because our band is heavy. Yeah. And we're putting together a tour for next year right now. And the bands that are all getting pitched are heavy bands.

And we keep saying like, dog, like you need a break. Yeah. You just want to hit these people over the head for three fucking hours. Yeah. You know what I mean? There's also the weird thing of like,

there's certain bands that are just hard to open for. Like we opened for corn right before the, um, and we were two or four in the bill before, uh, pandemic. And their crowd just, isn't interested.

Yeah. Like there's like, I don't know, like Slayer. People, I've never toured Slayer. People, like, you can't tour Slayer. Like, no one gives a shit. Right. Like, if you slip, yeah. Yeah.

Is there comics like that? Like, if you open for Joe Rogan, is no one give a shit about you? Or is it like, like, I mean, it's, I don't think any, it all depends on the comic. It all depends on the crowd that they've kind of cultivate. That's exactly what I'm saying, you know? I've opened for people who, like, their crowd comes from the internet and they just haven't been to a comedy show before.

So when I come out, they don't know that their guy is next. Oh, yeah. that's a good point so sometimes like the person they're there to see yeah oh wow sometimes the person they're here to see like they'll go out first and they'll be like this is my friend she's going to be here for 50 minutes and then I'll come back and they're way better I agree with you though like the cultivation like I think a lot is with the atmosphere of the room yeah like if the people know are like open to things like that like if a band's done that before or a comedian they're more open to it and they just want to go there to have a good time

I think a lot of times now Like I feel the same way Like we see like a bill And it's like it feels like you're seeing the same band Five times in a row It's like dude I need a break You know a lot of the bands in our genre right now It's like it's kind of rinse with me

Yeah all sort of sound the same Well dude coming up like Some of the most dangerous shows Were the were like seeing the get up kids At the Trocadero Because it was like Yes dude because all the fucking Hardcore kids would come out and dance

To the get up kids Four minute mile and shit another like there was like a pop punk this this amazing band called little league that had to change her name to kill verona they would like be on the bill and all their friends would come out to see them and then they'd stay for it so you had like these these like different types of people coming out to see these bills that just made it so interesting and fun and then now like i feel like i mean like i love going to fest and i love going to shows but you know it's it's kind of easier to walk out and take a smoke break if everything is in like like the same genre. He was speaking a smoke break. I was talking about this at dinner last night. Oh, it's skim. Dude, I legit love skims.

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Banking service is provided by Cash Apps, bank partners, prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank member FDIC. Instant discounts provided by Cash App, a block, ink brand. Visit Cashap.com. cash dot app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures smoke break i just get in there buddy i've been trying to stop smoking and zippix has been helping me yeah so much to not smoke all the time on planes rental cars yeah i have one in my hand right now they have cinnamon sweetwood my personal favorite mocha which i couldn't find this morning interesting yeah mocha's delicious why don't you why don't you have one with me well you know i was thinking about having one and i don't want to open my pouch just

yet, so I'm going to use my container that they sent me. Tube. That can hold in your pocket so you don't get stabbed. A Zube. Safety first. It's a Zube. I made that up. I don't know.

I think we need to copyright it right now. Pay me. I'm going to use my Zubb. A Zipix tube. There's an eye. There's a clip right there. Keep going. Oh, God.

Zippix. Good to the last chew. Good to the last chew. What if you swallowed one of those? Pay me. Speaking of smoke bake. I was a dinner. These legit.

They're awesome. I chew these on planes all the time because you're stuck in the airport for like hours and you can't smoke and it's a nightmare. And they've just enough fucking nicotine. Just enough. The cinnamon's the one I use because I, I, you know the trick is with these is, it's, you get all the nicotine and flavor off one side and you have a whole ass other side. Just flip it. Oh, yeah. Dude.

And the trick is, too, because I use these on stage. and I'm toothpick guy I go oh yeah fuck you and then I throw it and then I take out another one right in the eye right the eye yeah yeah

me and a toothpick guy is cool yeah I know like you might have come from a mob family maybe yeah you might have been a boxing coach at some point there's some shit you might not be good at brushing your teeth you know what I'm saying you might have some fucking chomper

speaking of smoke break though I was talking last night and you were there so we can talk about this a few weeks ago We were all at Keltony. You were on the panel. Yes. And you smoked a whole,

I think you smoked a whole pack of cigarettes on stage. I literally looked. I looked over at Tim and I was like, still got it. It's just in it tonight. Yes. And now that leads me to say Marlboro cigarettes. These are my favorite cigarettes.

Are you sponsored by Marlboro? Nothing hits me. Yeah. Wow. No. Could you imagine? I wish, you stupid mother. What if you were the new Marlboro man?

I should be the new Marlboro man, dude. I'm the only one keeping these fucking things of business. They don't sell cigarettes in the city anymore. I went to six different delis the other day. None of them sold cigarettes. I got a guy. You go to Jersey? No, I got a guy.

Shout out, Ali. I'll stop gourmet. But listen, I don't think you watches. It's like probably a lot really against his religion. Everything about my life. But I still support those guys. These guys need to sponsor me. How much are they in the city?

Bro, 20 bucks a pack. How much are these? I'll never tell my little secret. Are you two packs a day? Brother. We can talk about better things. Three packs a day? I wish.

Anyway. So what happened? Who was the guy? I was smoking on stage and we were talking about Kill Tony last night, eating dinner and catering. And somebody that has never been to Kill Tony, that huge fan brought up that fucking Mitch Headberg, motherfucker that was there that night. Who was that guy? Do we know his name? Some guy named Keegan?

Dude, did you see it? Didn't he, he said he wasn't doing Headberg? Is that what happened? I know how this conversation came up. Who's the band that is? It sounds just like, they sound just like, um,

Led Zeppelin, but they say they've never, Wolf Mother, no, no, Wolf Mother's cool kind of. No, who's, come on,

Greta Van Fleet. Greta Van Fleet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw this interview where he was like, no, we never listened to Led Zeppelin. I'm like,

and this dude that night. Also embarrassing to admit, even if you don't sound like them. But, yeah. Thank you. We've never listened to Led Zeppelin. I know.

What are you an idiot? I mean, They're just so, they're so pure. Yeah. If you remember that night, though. Just keep ramble on. If you remember that night, they killed Tony, that the guy's doing the whole thing.

Hey, hey, hey, I'm not done. Hey, if I die, I hope I take a stairway to have. Come on. You have no kids. Fuck ice immigrants on. That, that was like a weird fucking thing. One hit on him that I leaned, I should have just fucking blurted it out, but I wanted to call him Mitch Get No, Headberg.

Did you say that? No, I wanted to, but I... So he was just like, I didn't... No, you have to watch it. So we were talking about that band last night, though, and how they've never heard Zeppelin. And then that night came up, and I was like, oh, we'll see Ian tomorrow. I've got to ask him about it.

And he literally was like, the manorisms, like the Mitch coked up fucking weird thing. Yeah. I hate the delivery, the cadence. And we're such consumers of comedy Like more than music and honest I'm just like I'm so much more

I don't listen to comedy We're on the other end of you guys So we only listen to comedy and podcast basically So I'm sitting there going Right And here's the problem with it though Is it was kind of good Dude that's the thing

Well Headberg's good No but his jokes Yeah No no no but not Hetberg's great know his bits tell her that his bits were decent yeah that you even said it yes i said it i like giving like good feedback on the show i try to it unless they're like complete shithead fucking losers like a couple of those guys that night that are like irredeemable yeah but um the the one that that guy's jokes were like good if he had just been like yeah man i i love headberg and i'm a

newer comic and when we're new we all try to emulate someone you know yeah and uh i don't know My real question is, like, so that band that sounds just like Led Zeppelin is huge. Bradavan flirt, Fleet, whatever. Yeah, they play arenas. Yeah. Is that, is that, is that is, is that is that is that is that is that. Patrick Stump, Brett a band fleet and who's the other guy we hate? The other one was yours.

Who's my guy I hate? Uh, how are you forgot? Kenny G. Kenny G. Kenny G. You're, we got eyes on you. Is this kid, does this kid, this kid. Getting softer on it.

time. We're watching how you're up to. Kenny G. And this kid, you guys are just, you know. Not our favorite. Not our favorite.

You love him. Life is a precious thing. And this kid get big, though. Can he become a headliner? No. I don't think so. So why is that existing?

Oh, you definitely can. No, I think you could. No, you can't say that. You don't know their business. If the band can do it. That's what I'm asking.

Musicians can do shit. We can't. Like, you guys can play the same set over and over and people fucking go. What I'm saying is, there's enough of an audience. jokes to the same audience or else they're like what this we heard this yeah you know

that guy's fuck totally different that's it that's it you can pull out a guitar at a funeral and unite everyone in in a nice moment if i start telling jokes at someone's funeral i'm gonna get kicked out okay it's different i like the idea unless they're really good yeah actually black fun you get a pass you can do a joke those are the most fun if you ever get a chance go to a black Also, comedian's funeral, the funniest anyone's ever been in their life. Oh, my God. Have you been to one?

I've been to a couple, yeah. What happens? Can you slow out? I mean, people are so fun. I went to a friend's funeral that, like, was a comedy festival, and everybody was so fucked up and funny. It was like. Oh, I thought you meant your friend was a comedy festival.

That died the way you played. My friend was a dead comedy festival. Yeah, yeah, my friend. What was that one in Portland and everyone wanted to go to forever? Bridge Town. Yeah. Yeah, that's, like I said, black funerals. I was watching this show last night where, like,

oddly enough called black funeral. No, historically, like in New Orleans, they do that. There's a term for it. It's called the Noland. No, they all walk down the street, though. Oh, that's what, that's what Mark wants. He told me that last week. It's the coolest shit I've ever seen.

My father-in-law, Long Island Jew, great guy. Shout out. Has a place in New Orleans. He was a black funeral. He wants the New Orleans. He wants the walk. He wants. the ban, he wants to walk.

What I'd really like when I die. That's what it's called. The second line. The second line. And they don't play like, you have to be a resident. It's boat. I know it.

That's cool. That's what it should be. It's cool as shit. It should be a party. It should be a fucking party. Yeah. I want my pie in the sky idea is to have a party at my house and I go on the next room and I kill myself and everyone's there for it and they have to bond and clean up and

laugh and emotionally navigate that situation. And haunt them forever because they would return my calls in life. So in the past life they will fucking know me. The macaw party thing is a thing. People have divorce parties. Divorce parties are fun. I think there should be more divorce parties than weddings. Abortion party. I've been doing abortion party. That's fun. Have you really?

Yeah, of course. Look at me. Look at my bangs. Tell the Christian band. Let's take that backwards. Yeah, let's I'm out. I'm out. I'm out before that would you ask? Go ahead. Let's walk that back. I want to hear Where's the taser? Wait a minute. Don't tell me you've been to an abortion party and you sell pot. No, I don't sell pot anymore.

That's my two strikes. How does it work? One of your friends gets an abortion and then everyone has a party. Is there like anything? And then one of your real morose friends has a seance to talk to the kid. But is there like a cake or anything? There's a cake. There's a cake.

There's like booze because that, you know. But the cake's the only thing you bring to term. That makes no sense. You bring a cake to turn. Well, you bring it out after it's done cooking. You don't take it out to you. Oh, you take it out of the oven. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's wild. I've never heard of it. It's kind of like bachelor at party vibes, but cooler and more fun. It's all female people. Or like, cool guys. Are there any guys who are nice or gay? I was waiting for you to say that point. Yeah.

Are there any guys there that are like, you know. You want to go again? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You want to take this from the top? See, we do another one? Yeah, dude. Redo. Hey, this is a good reminder.

I'll pull out. Say it. Pull out party. First one was a demo. Let's get the real thing going. Say it, say it. I just said, first one was a demo. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

I thought you bet the rift. We're good. You should have aborted it. Anyway, now does that make you uncomfortable? The abortion party? Hell, I just never heard of it. I've never heard of it either. I think it's just some people want to have a party, man.

How did it? at work if you have like a friend that's a parent at a party like that would be weird to me. You don't bring a parent. I don't think they're... She said a bachelor right. Do you think girls that are having

abortion parties have friends that are parents? Yeah, you kind of stop texting that girl once she gets the parent, once she gets trained men. Fair enough. Can I just say, I don't know how it happened, but subconsciously have been doing this. The whole abortion. Oh, you know how that happened.

I've seen it four or five times and I've just sort of sat here with my Zippix, toothpick, and sweet wood flavor and just watched. Hey, actually Dinner on show Zippics Flip that, Zippix Zippics

Lady in the Tramp Speaking of Tramps How many of these abortion parties You've been to? Which is more than one Same girl, kind of Kind of love. No, same friend group

I have two kids And I feel like my wife, if invited, would go Yeah, cool Cool moms can come Well, can I say I don't think it's so Like an abortion is a massively Tragic experience to go through

No matter how you want to shake it I mean Huh I don't know I think sometimes it's like It sucks but it's not that tragic I well I'm not a woman I can only imagine

Getting something sucked out of you It was like You've had something sucked out of you Yeah but I didn't have it in my belly for a while And my balls for a little Brother You know what I mean Just south of there.

What if I had an abortion party every time I got sucked off? Oh my God. Let's running back, guys. Happened again. See what I mean? You can have fun with it. I need to leave now.

But what I was, that's a good point. What I'm saying, though, is like, at its base, whether you, it is an experience, it's not ideal. It's not ideal. It's not what you want it.

But having a party, I think, is almost like a coping mechanism. Absolutely. to deal with the severity of what's going on rather than celebrating. Like, I just fucking killed. Yeah, yeah, totally. That's what it actually is.

People would hear that term and go, it's a minimization of it. It's not bad. I think it's like, more like a... That's the point I wanted to get across. That's the divorce party too. In a way, I think it is like almost like a coping thing. And it's not like, let's celebrate this thing that happened, but like let's kind of make it okay to feel better and get past it.

Yeah, and also abortions are expensive. And it's a thing where all your friends bring food to your house. Really? You know what I mean? It's like a potluck? Kind of, yeah, because everybody knows that you just spent way too much money on something you weren't expected. Would you want your suck-off party potluck? Suck-off party rules.

Suck-off party pot-luck-off party pot-luck. It's about time for a suck-off party at my house. Wouldn't be the same without you. No, not at all. Oh, the M-X-P-P-S-P tattoos. I love it. Yes. SPP-P is your new to S-Dix tattoos.

Suck-off party pot-luck. Are we getting those tattoos now? I'll do it if you do it. I will do it. I will do that. What's your, what's the food? Seems like a mac and cheese guy. Your party's got mac and cheese for sure.

Oh, yeah, mac and pineapple, too, so I taste good for the next one. It can't taste. Can you please stop eating asparagus? I ate some asparagus here the night. It keeps on giving. It's still going on. Dude, the minute you pee. I kind of like one of my pee smells.

Me too. Makes you feel alive. I'll say it. Makes you feel alive. We're all animals. You know, what do you say? You know when your pee smells and you're like, wow, we're all animals. Dude, I think that a lot.

Like, dude, it's pretty wild that we all shit. Yeah. And food passes through us. And no matter what decorum we want to have, we sit on something and just go, fucking cool. It's just got a pool. So you guys are celebrating the 20th anniversary. It was last year.

Groundbreaking album. That was last year. Oh, shit. It came out in 2004. Yeah. It's 25. So we did like, we toured the world last year

on the chasing safety. So then this big tour you're going out is to support the new album. Yeah, we have a record came out in March. It's called a place after this

and we're on tour with Pavarroach right now and Rise Against. Yes. We're opening, which we haven't done in 20 years. We're opening. How do you like it?

How do you? Oh, I think it's fucking awesome. Dude, opening rules. You know why? I mean, opening is so fun. We still, catering is still open when we finish.

We haven't, I mean, we have it not headlined or been at least direct support in 20 years. We were second to four on that corn thing we're talking about here.

Yeah. Do you like it? I like every part except the show. What? The show is just, I mean, the first leg,

which was awesome, is his arena, so there's still like a, kind of a club vibe because it's, I know, it's obviously massive, but the lights are down.

You can tell he's had some success. An arena is a club to him. Keep going. No, I'm just saying, like, it's like there's an atmosphere. A close-off atmosphere. That butt rock band must really went places, on there, Grant? Well, you know. But now we're playing, like, the daylight in the amphitheater, and it's just, you're

the beer hot dog band. It's hard. Right. It's more of a work. So you like everything but playing when you open, but when you guys are headlining, you like playing. Oh, yeah. It's because you eat dinner at fucking 1230 at night or whatever.

Like, yeah. Nothing is open. It's, I mean, it's, it's very similar. Like nothing is open, you get done, you're tired, but you're still, like, amped. You're not going to go lay down. You have to walk through an empty mall alone. I don't, I don't not like it. It's just, it's, it's the most work it feels like when you're playing.

Because you're trying to win over people that literally don't know you or don't get up. The genre we've had all our success in, and we've been so fucking lucky and fortunate, like, isn't the butt rock radio genre. And I love, I love Papa Roach and Rise Against, but they are the radio rock thing. And those fans. Is Rise Against Radio Rock? Oh, yeah. They've got some hits. They're a punk band.

They're like a political punk band. Yes. That's what I thought. But I never, I never pictured them as like, I'll get in on the rooftop ready to. I mean, that was a huge hit.

Swing life away. Swing life away. Huge hit. I remember that. I remember swing, swing from the motor side. My heart. My bones. What is that?

Rejects. Can you help me find a life? Yeah. But anyway. I just. Harmonized with Eric. It's a really weird, like, we're, we're, 23 years into touring, we're earning a crowd.

Yeah. And we, and I'll say this for us, by the end, it works. By the end of the set, but we get 30 minutes. So I like it for that reason, because 30 minutes is child's play. Yeah. Like, we, we typically play 90 to 100 minutes. That's wild. Horrible.

So long. Wild. I do an hour. And then the meet and greet sometimes will be so long. that I the second show starts and I'm still doing the meet and greet and then I sit for 10 minutes and then do another hour to meet and greet you're back to back but I can't imagine 90 minutes being on stage for 90 minutes yeah yuck yeah I can't imagine being on stage with nothing but a microphone for an oh that sounds terrifying yeah yeah seeing the faces as I see at these shows and in the

front row they're just like brother see too yeah it's just at least I have music to hide behind Never played the funny bone in Hartford, Connecticut. Man there, dude. And then by the end, and here's the thing, they just don't know you. Yeah. And I think there's a little bit of pride where, like, we do really well. And we sell a lot of tickets, but not to those people. This is a different sect of humans.

So we get up there and you're like, oh. Like, have there been any nights where it's just, like, painfully obvious? Shortly into the set that there is no. shot of this being a success? No. Wow. The people love rock me. Because I lied to myself.

No, I'm just kidding. I jerk off with my own tears. I'm a delusional narcissism. No, honestly, like, me too, brother. The people love music. So they're there to fuck. Like, you just have to like,

it's like, people know comedy. I heard there to fuck and then wrestling over here and I got nervous. I heard shorts wrestling. And I got a little scared. If you do a set of the mothership and you're good, you'll be fine. Yeah, yeah.

If you suck, you're fucked. If you suck, you're fucked. If you suck, you're fucked. If you do a set at the mothership and you're good, you're fine. That's not certainly true. Is that not true? I mean, I haven't been. If you go and you don't suck, people there know what they're getting.

They're getting comedy. Yeah, but it's like some of them are there to, like, really, like, get a certain type of comedy. Yeah. And if you're not giving them that, then they are going to not. like it yeah you know about that like they want to hear you fucking explain talk about immigrants and how trans people are bad and everything and then when you're on the pro side of that they do not like that they're not really interested and then you go into graphic detail about gay male anal sex while making eye contact with a moment in the front row to make her uncomfortable because she

oh so you're a fan you've heard him do gay male anal sex Like in the next room? I think you perfectly walk the line of that, though. Oh, you, you crushed it. I tried to. Oh, I appreciate that. But you perfectly walk the line. Yeah, I tried to.

Because I know what side you stand on, but you also will fuck around and, of course. Talk about black funerals. Yeah. So, do you know what I mean? Like, that's interesting. Well, that's a, I think is the most fun is the dance. And then, but if I sniff out that you're like laughing for the wrong reason, like, I don't fucking play with that, you know.

I've also seen clips of you doing that. Yeah. Which I think is dope. Like, I stand for what you stand for. for sure like i like jokes like i love jokes and silly and like anyone can get it as long as it's with a wink and you know that it's there's no like teeth behind it but when you're like saying shit with teeth and you're actually believing the things you say i do not get down with it yes that's scary on either side of the aisle man totally like totally super scary i mean

dude it happens with musicians too of like taking lyrics the wrong way you know like Because once you make something, people can take it however they want. Have you ever had anyone take something the wrong way? And you've had to be like, yo, that's not what this fucking is. We just did a feature for Bring Me the Horizon. And was the lyric about how you hate when a girl's underage and her dad punches you in the face. I get it, brother. No, so obviously our history, we were a Christian band until 2010.

Yeah. Nine? Also, sure. Right there. But then I'm sure people have asked, but I'd love to know what that's like breaking. We get a little serious unpack if you want. But Spencer and I didn't write the lyrics of this Bring Me song.

It was delivered to us. Ollie FaceTime's us. We're in my studio in Nashville. And I didn't have to sing this. So I was like, whatever. But the line was... You're going to hell if you're queer. I didn't write it. I'm par with that.

The line was if Jesus Christ comes back, we'll kill that fucker twice. What? Yeah. Yeah. How could you kill something that wasn't even real? Oh, Jesus. Christ. We'll kill you if you come back. No, I mean, that's a heavy...

I hate you, I'm sorry. That's a really weird, heavy thing to say. Because I still have a lot of beliefs. Yeah. And Ollie explained it to us, like, it's this post-apocalyptic thing. We're kind of poking fun. Like, and it wasn't about literally... But our fans went through the roof over that.

I mean, it was bad. Like, I had shit in my... My DMs for, like, six months were, like, fucking i just didn't open them yeah it was very very christian response well it's always very very forgiving it's all like to kill you no it was i mean that lyric i love jesus and i'll kill you and i would never i would never write that down even if i'm talking about some post-apocalyptic world like fantasy you know bring me saying is very like anime fantasy lands that they build and yeah talent pure talent i love those guys but i just was like i would never write that down

But Spencer didn't have an issue singing it Because he knew the backstory on it People shit their pants I mean it was fucking Did you address it publicly or anything? No good That's not our thing We're not gonna we don't do stuff like that

Yeah we don't do stuff like that Yeah that's awesome That must have been like do you even play that song Alive anymore? No it wasn't ours It was a Bring Me the Rise and song Spencer's actually flying I don't know if you even know this I do There's a huge festival there headlining called

Louder Than Life is that the one Yep it is It is yeah it's huge It's like 80,000 people, and their flying pins are out to sing it. Oh, wow. So there might be another wave. Speaking of shows and flying, we are on a fun thing together. Gross.

Are you announced? Not yet. Are you going to announce yourself? This comes out in two weeks. Will the announcement be made? It will if you say it. I mean, this is your fucking podcast. Is this late breaking news?

I, here first. I am doing the email. is not dead cruise you are playing bass and under oath so let me you heard it I'm playing can I play the wooden spoons Let me

Let's loud as fuck Let me formally ask you I do a show At the end of the week Shut up Go ahead I do a show at the end of the week Called Aaron and Friends

And it's like a It's in the big theater On the cruise And everyone comes and plays You have to come do something Dude absolutely Cut Shaw last year Crowdsurfed

And sang a song with us. I will do that in a heartbeat. You have to play. You have to come and do something. We play sellout by Real Big Fish. I already play that at my high school talent show. So if you want to, how do you know it? Only if you bring the same crowd, brother. No, I, so I'm formally asking you, I need, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I need a, I'm some lyrics for you, actually. You could do a poem? Dude, I'll do a poem.

You came out and just did a reading, it would be nuts. Dude, no, I would love to do that. Also, I would love if we could play, like, a song together, that would be so fun. Everyone, dude, it's a mess. That would be incredible. We should do, like, a cover song of something. I've done it twice now.

They bill me now. It was a pop-up thing at first, and it became a big show on the cruise. It's a variety show, and it's ridiculous. Dude, what cover song could we play? Dude, we've done. I'll get like a wig and dress up like Stephen Tyler. Tim's daughter is playing one of her own songs.

Really? She's 15. Can we do, me and the band, can we do a ska song? Yes. You can do whatever you want. Are you a lead singer for that song? I'm a screamer. So no, but if I give you the microphone, if I give you the microphone though and me and the... Dude, I sing, I sang vocals on a hardcore track for a band called Going Off in Manchester, United Kingdom.

of that band. And they're great. Shout out. And songs about Bound by Blood. And I actually have a track coming out. It already came out by the time this episode came out with this band spent. They're a Salt Lake City hardcore band. They have me come and sing a feature track on their new album.

So you're going to come. We'll do a Scott track. We'll figure it out. We can figure it out. Sure. Let's be the change we want to see in the world. Let's make a hardcore scoff mashup. Do you still listen to Scott?

And Lizzie will play the two. Are you coming on a- Why do I have to play the tuba? Are you coming on the cruise, too? That felt like you were calling me fat. No, no. Oh, my God. Jesus projection.

You can play the obo, you skinny little thing. Thank you. What is Wade? What is Wade has to do with tuba? Picture the tuba guy in the marching band. You're picturing a little guy? You got to be big. Yeah.

Is he fat? Yeah, he's fat. Really? No. He's big. Pop off in the chat. Our tuba player's fat. Of course.

I never You just blew my mind with that I've never heard of that Well it was a reference to him saying Tuba earlier Do you often listen to Skah? Yes Do you?

I listen to the classics I grew up with You know often You know who I've been Listened to a lot lately The Impossibles Remember them? Hey were the Impossibles

From Austin Texas But the recording is great too It has a feeling This probably sounds like My son recorded it What Just those old records It sounds so bad.

Oh, dude, I listened to Op Ivy the other day, that record sounds. Dude, Op Ivy, we could use a little unity right now. There you go. Come on, buddy. Because we're living in a bad town. And a lot of us have a healthy body, but a sick mind. Bring it. And there's a lot of bad crowds out there.

And I'm tired of people yelling in my ear. And, you know, all I know is that I don't know. All I know is that I don't know nothing. We're just going to have a little more knowledge. You don't know that? I knew Apavi is, but I've never heard. heard that in my life. It's really beautiful, actually. And poignant for now. Thank you. I was just

using their different song names in my autistic memory. I love a reading. Tell a story. You're going to do a reading at my show on the cruise. I'll do whatever you want, Papa. Yeah, that'd be great. It would be fun. I'm excited. Are you going to? No. Gatter. Come on. Okay. Bring the tuba. I'll go. I'll learn tuba. And I'll get really fat.

She'll go on a, she'll go on a liquefite ice cream diet for six weeks before. I'm bulking for my tuba for tuba. You just sit in a bodega grabbing fuck loads of ice cream. What are you doing? Boking for tuba. Tuba.

I'm playing the tuba on a cruise. Everyone gets there. By the time she gets there, she can't breathe, getting up the stairs. They won't let her on the boat. That was a, that was Jordan on the cruise.

It was good ice cream. He had a bowl every time I saw him on one of the cruises. I'm allergic to milk, so I've never been on a cruise before. And I am. This is not the way to do your first crew. Let me explain why.

Because you'll be up. It's so. nice and you have all the perks because Am I going to be able to smoke? Cigarettes? Yes. I will. Up in our area. But I should also bring my Zipix. Sweetwood and or cinnamon. When you can't smoke, but you still want to

Rip, you can zip. That was good. I'm a writer. That was good. And I'm a comical genius. When you want to smoke and you can't when you zip. You can't rip so you can still zip. You can't rip so you can still zip.

You can't rip so you can till still zip. Punched it down. You ruined it. You put a toothpick in your lip. When you still want to smoke, but you can't rip. Can you not sigh?

Okay. Can you not audibly sigh? All right? I mean, they heard that in Bayonne. I got it. Are you ready? Are you ready?

When you still want to smoke. All right. When you still want to smoke. Clip this. When you still want to smoke, but you can't rip. You can still zip. Put a toothpick in your lip.

Get your fix with zipicks. Ladies and gentlemen, that's the podcast. That's the podcast. That is the podcast. Punch it up, punch it down, motherfucker. Punch it up, punch it down, punch it all around, and you can see us in any town. Any town.

I'm a stroke. Podcast. On my tour dates. He's been spoken for a long time. Let's get a bluff. pressure cop in this bitch. Dude, guys, that was so fun. Thank you so much for coming on.

That was a really, really fun. Please tell everyone out there what you want them to get eyes on, where they can check you out, what they can do. You want to do your dates first. You go first. Lady haircuts first. The place after this one out now, we're on tour with Papa Roach until October 4th. October 4th. Cool.

Yeah. Awesome. It's all East Coast. Where can they get the album? Under oath, 777.com. Old email. Napster. Limeware? Anywhere you want?

Caza. Caza? Oh, yeah. AP3.com. Pure volume. Play it on Winamp. Um, but whatever you stream. You're awesome.

And you guys are going on a huge tour next year, too. It's not announced. Oh, well, stick around. We will tour next year in some capacity. Love you all. And they're going to be headlining the Emo's Not Dead crews. With the Used, us and the Co-Hadline with the Used. Co-headlining with the Used.

story so far and your and yourself now you start your dates on yourself yes eifidance.com for all my dates you can see me uh jfl toronto september 26 27th toronto Ontario Canada um and then

I'm going to be in Houston Omaha dates for 2011 26 are coming down now Denver comedy works datings Nashville um uh I'm going everywhere.

San Diego, California, December 31st, two shows, New Year's Eve, my birthday, come on out, eInfidance.com. Ian do an odd guy doing odd jobs. YouTube.com slash Ianfinance comedy for my travel show and all my stand-up. Check out Jordan Special. Take me with you out on Netflix now. Punchup.org slash Jordan Jensen for all her dates.

Lizzie. Follow me on Instagram at Lizzie Cassidy. I have two podcasts. One's called Respectfully and One is called Close Calls. And September 26th and 27th, I'm headlining, Don't Tell Comedy, Chicago. Get out of here. Oh, that's so fun.

Yeah. Are you going to crush it? Follow Lizzie. You guys loved her on the last episode, and you love her now. So follow her. Check her out. Support her. Support these guys.

Support us. And support yourselves. We appreciate you tune in. When did your tube album drop? Do you have that date for that? I can't say. I'm not allowed to say right now. Understood.

Come back on the pond and announce it. We'll be right back. Doesn't matter, doesn't matter what you say anymore.