Bein' Ian With Jordan - Bein' Ian With Jordan Ep114: Big Dawgs W/ Brendan Sagalow and Militarie Gun

Starting point is 00:00:00 Telling jokes and having smokes Riding bikes all through the night It's a wild ride When you're being Ian Coffee ice no matter what Now you know he likes it in the butt It's a wild ride And you're being Ian Being Ian Life is shit, but you're positive Let's find out what it's like to live alive being Ian

Starting point is 00:00:36 Being Ian with Jordan Let's get into it let's get into it let's get into it. Let's get into it. Oh, are we recording? Oh, welcome back to another episode of Be A Deity with Jordan. I am so excited. Jordan is on the road in sunny California. So we have Brendan Sagalow.

Starting point is 00:01:13 Would you forget? I was looking. We have something to say. I was looking. I was going to say male Jordan, but that's not. No, she's Brent. She's female. Me. How about that over? J.K., I am so excited for our guest today. I am such a fan of this band, Ian Shelton and Will Acuna from Military Con. Welcome to being Ian with Ian. Yes

Starting point is 00:01:47 Well You made my name sound Italian. What is it? How do you? Fend it. He's a bad. I mean When you if this is really gonna go sideways now Yes, here take a knife if you need to There's nothing will likes less than Italians How dare you can you come into my neighborhood? How do you say your last name? That's why we don't like playing in New York. He hates it. I love it

Starting point is 00:02:14 He hates it. What do you hate about Italians? I kind of agree, but Find a lot of people agree What's so great about being in hate groups cuz you just go there and go, what do you hate about them? Yeah, yeah. What? You know, what do you like? First of all, how do you say how do you Spanish? It's Mexican. Mexican. I didn't want to be the one to say it.

Starting point is 00:02:40 How do you say your last name? Acuna. Acuna. Acuna. You put the Acuna. You really dig it. ACUNA. Well, if you're putting an enye in there, I'm saying the enye. One of my one of my favorite moments in in woke culture was so I lived in Seattle for a long time. Oh, let's go.

Starting point is 00:02:59 And a guy we know said. He was he just said something like, is there something, he did the Michael Scott, is there something less offensive that you'd like to be called other than Mexican? And you're like, dude, Mexican is not an offensive term. I know. Why is that offensive?

Starting point is 00:03:16 It's starting to become that and true. But in Washington, it makes sense. Like in California, you know Mexicans, but in Seattle, you might be a little bit, you know, you probably only know white people. Yeah, and there's probably no Mexicans in Seattle. There's a lot. There's a lot. There's more Guatemalans, I would say. Whoa, guess who's not going to Seattle now?

Starting point is 00:03:36 I love that every state has their own Spanish people. You know? Huh? Every state has their own. Is that what this show's going to be? Is that what the show's going to be? We're going so far in the race immediately. I say something to you. What? No, I'm trying to get you to extrapolate. Big dog.

Starting point is 00:03:54 Well, New York has where we have easy. Come on. My you know, the migrants. What? No. Seattle has gone sideways so fast. It's fine to be weird about Italians, but now we're talking too far. So wait, what don't you like about Italians and how can I change your mind? We need to go to Spumoni Gardens! And then we're gonna go to Arthur Avenue!

Starting point is 00:04:22 And then we're gonna get to Olive Garden and then... Oh my god! Oh my God. Pinocchio was way too. Yeah, you know, I don't like Mexicans. I had a bad experience. Taco Bell. Yeah. I was going to say the bus. We have a guitar if you want to play. We could just sing for the rest of the bucket. We could do a couple of screwdriver songs. What you would call it.

Starting point is 00:04:53 So wait, what about Italians? He likes Italians. He loves Italians. They're my favorite. Favorite race. Thank you. But he just really doesn't like when people mispronounce his last name. It's very offensive.

Starting point is 00:05:09 You know, people have been mispronouncing my last name for my entire life. Ian finance. Yeah. What do they call you? Well, I dance Roy finance Roy at L.O.L. Comedy Club used to introduce me and go, ladies and gentlemen, he was a flamboyantly gay Dominican man that always wore a Pink boa and he went ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage our favorite Inanfondante That's one guy though, but my name is mispronounced

Starting point is 00:05:44 One guy, though. My name is mispronounced all the fucking time. Fuck you! It's one guy. Your name's Ian Fidey. It's so easy. I just did the version of hearing that one person ate a cat. I'm like, they're eating the cats. They're eating the dogs. Every everything now is like one guy does something. People are saying, dude, people are saying. Well, that's what the Internet is. I'm coming up with a theory about the Internet right now.

Starting point is 00:06:04 Uh-huh This big dog and then whenever it agrees with you they laugh ago And when I bring up something sad it's cuz you're in a big Tonight when I see military gunplay babies, all right, I'm bringing His dad actually my dad my dad did that shut up my dad brought a gun to our show. Yeah, no way That's awesome. He's like, what do you mean? I can't bring a gun. Well, no, okay, so it started It started with him trying to bring a gun in there like you can't have it started with the gun And I believe he called the security pussies and then came back I started with him trying to bring a gun in there like you can't have a gun. Oh it started with the gun. It started with the gun.

Starting point is 00:06:45 And I believe he called the security pussies and then came back. Dude that's awesome. Yeah that's cool. So this is the man who raised me. I met him when I was four years old, not my biological father. Right. He is much bigger than I am. I am a small human.

Starting point is 00:07:01 He is a big human. You're a good sized human. Be careful how you talk. Your brain is listening. Self talk, self talk. Yeah, well, no matter how much I self talk, I can't get taller. It's not going to happen. You know what I mean, brother? You go, I'm tall. I'm tall, I'm tall. I'm not bald.

Starting point is 00:07:17 I'm not bald. My dick works. My dick works. Skinny, skinny, skinny. Not gay, not gay. You didn't eat a pine ice cream and a chopped cheese last night at 4 a.m While watching the new murder doc on HBO So my dad then we start playing and I slowly see him work Working his way through the crowd to the stage with the gun. Now, the gun, the gun. He's walking through this. Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Starting point is 00:07:46 Pardon me. Pardon me. Dad is a singer here. The gun is in the car at this point. But I see what a pussy. I see I see it work. And he's like this. Like he's like trying to get my attention. I'm like, I fucking see you stop.

Starting point is 00:08:01 Like, stop advancing. Stop it. And he's working his way through the crowd and he works his way through the pit. And I'm like, no, because he's a big guy with a big temper. I was like someone stage dives on him and her of course swinging. You know, like I've seen him getting fistfights before.

Starting point is 00:08:18 I know. Yeah. Then he gets all the way to the stage. Just like is looking for my acknowledgement. This is the first song I don't see in the rest of the set and apparently moments later. He got kicked out of the show because He's gotten to some fucking thing with security about him having a cup of ice. I don't know. It was all Trying to call He did not like what was going on.

Starting point is 00:08:48 He did not like what was going on in there. Not a fan of Guatemalans. Yeah. Got tattoos that look like this, but they're all American flags, you know? Dude, yeah. Your dad would love big dogs. Yeah, he always got it. And that'll be the last time I bring this up. Please keep doing it. I love it. Your new name is Big Dog.

Starting point is 00:09:08 We start talking about something said. You just see me get a red rocket. I don't like that. Why? When dogs get hot on? I just don't like any of what's going on here. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Go back to your groundbreaking story. You got a guy got kicked out of a punk show. My dad will bring a gun to this podcast.

Starting point is 00:09:35 I'll tell you that much. I'll bring a knife. Well, come knife is your dad would murder me. Probably your dad. You're fucked. You're fucked with the fist or the gun or the knife. Whatever he's got you. Oh, I love it. I would love to get just murdered by an angry father one day.

Starting point is 00:09:52 We can make that happen. I think we can make that happen for the Patreon. Get murdered by a dad. Patreon.com slash BDM pod. If you're a dad or have one out there and bring them in, have them have them all attempt to murder Ian and he adopt me first. I really would like an alive father.

Starting point is 00:10:12 Oh, I can see a dad beating me to death by me just being like, can you be my real dad? He's like, shut the fuck up. There's nothing that dad's like less than that. Oh, yeah. That's what Dave Grohl's going through right now. Oh, right. Right. Yeah, why did he make that announcement? That was yeah blackmail. Yeah, why would oh there had to she probably Yeah, these treats you're gonna get out in front of she probably was gonna be like I'm gonna tell everyone he was like don't She was like well, yeah, but but now it's like I dare you like who's gonna believe you that's what I would say

Starting point is 00:11:01 Everyone's gonna believe that like the biggest rock star in the world had a Oh, bitch. Everyone's going to believe that, like, the biggest rock star in the world had a child. Yeah, yeah. That's why I'm not like, you know. Especially when it comes out with a goatee and tribal tattoo. Right. Right. The singing voice on this child sounds pretty familiar.

Starting point is 00:11:15 I got another confession to make. Is that Foo Fighters? Yeah, right? Yeah. What song know much about Foo Fighters? The best, the best, the best. I know F I know food fighters that song is a banger. Come on Damn do another one that you think I won't know there goes my man Wasn't that song about kirk obain

Starting point is 00:11:42 No, not it's about the every man, was what he said. My Hero? Yeah, it's about, and so he said he hates when people apply it to specific things. Because it's about normal people. Because I remember when I listened to it in my head, I was like, I bet that's about Kurt. Well, I don't think everybody does.

Starting point is 00:12:00 I don't think everybody confirmed that any songs are about him. I thought it was about Courtney Love. My hero? No, it was called My Hero, not My Murderer of My Best Friend. Clip that up. Yeah, clip that chat. I love Nirvana so much. My all time favorite band. Dave Grohl goes to the beach I used to go to when I was younger.

Starting point is 00:12:22 Never met him, but I heard he's really nice when people stop to take pictures. When we played Coachella, someone was like, do you just see Dave Grohl? And I was like, what? Where? And he went in to watch the Aquabats. No way! Wow, that's awesome. Are you, that's, you know what I can describe that as?

Starting point is 00:12:39 Super rad. Go ahead. And so he, I was like, I gotta go, I'm gonna go stand, I have to go stand next to Dave Grohl. And so I go, and this is why I can't go stand I have to go stand next to the wrong side go And this is why I can't say this right now But why I think Dave girls also cool is I went side stage and try to be like where's Dave girl? Dave girl was not side stage. He was in the crowd. Yes. Whoa, that's awesome. That's the coolest I love that so much. You just they're vibing it is in the Aquabats It's so funny when you're like with someone that's like, I don't know about a hero,

Starting point is 00:13:05 but someone you're like, oh, fuck, that's Dave Grohl. And you're like watching something, but you're really just watching them watch it. You know what I mean? Like I went to this was a couple of years ago when the stand comedy club was on Second Avenue, the first one, Third Avenue. But go ahead. Fuck you. Let's get real local. What were the questions? I go, yeah, the yeah. And everyone who worked their social security numbers were

Starting point is 00:13:28 and I sat at a table with Mac Miller and watched the comedy show hero. He's not my hero, but he just does merch. I don't know what the. But I I watched the whole fucking comedy show. You say no to him. No, but we were having like a thing where we were like laughing But I watched the whole fucking comedy show with Mac Miller. No, but we were having like a thing where we were like laughing with each other, where it's like, ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Starting point is 00:13:51 It was more me going, ha ha ha ha ha. It's a good moment. Yeah, it was cool. Wow. I saw a little Stevie, Stevie Vans Ant walking down the street the other day, sale from Sopranos. I saw him. I did. Dan walking on the street the other day, Sil from Sopranos. I saw him. Dude, he was in the West Village. I did Adam Friedland's show,

Starting point is 00:14:07 and right in front of their fucking studio was him in his Bentley. He had this amazing fucking Bentley with this little King Chevalier dog just running through it, and he was just sitting there. Did you say anything to him? No, no, no.

Starting point is 00:14:22 Did he look like a pirate? He was wearing the fucking pirate thing. Always, always. He was piring it up down West Third and McDougal the other night, and I don't know why I panicked, but I didn't, I went, thank you for everything. Can I have a picture? And he just laughed at me and walked away.

Starting point is 00:14:41 Hell yeah. He went, everything? And I was like, that's so good on you. Good. You should not have acknowledged me. Thank you for everything. God, it's so embarrassing. When I start, he goes, name one thing. Yeah, he goes, everything, huh?

Starting point is 00:14:55 Go ahead. You go sopranos, of course. You went about the first thing. I like I like to what was his thing on serious. It was like little Stevie's garage or whatever I don't know Sirius keeps calling me because I got a car and they're like you have a free trial and they want me to sign up So they won't I'm getting hounded by serious XM currently. Oh every dude you should do it. I did that with my car

Starting point is 00:15:17 It's pretty well, I want to do it, but I'm on I'm not Like I literally was on your trial right? The trial I'm on tour. So I was like, I literally was on the phone. I was like, could I start the trial in three months when I'm home? And they're like, the trial's already started. And I was like, well, I'm never going to listen to SiriusXM then. Right. They should hold off on your trial. That's what I wanted.

Starting point is 00:15:38 And they won't let me. Criminals. I got the guys at Umbridge here. Should we ambush them right now? Who? Paul? Jack? Vaughn. Oh. Listen up, Jack.

Starting point is 00:15:46 Is that the head? Yeah. From SiriusXM? Mm-hmm. I used to have a radio show on there. Oh. During the pandemic, and then it- On Faction Punk?

Starting point is 00:15:55 Got, no, I wish. But I- No one listens to it, so. No, well, no one listened to mine. That's why they got rid of me. They would've done really, you would've done really well on Faction then. Nobody listened at all. What on what on Rawdog?

Starting point is 00:16:07 Yeah. Remember the show I had? Oh, yeah. And playlist. Yeah, I would ask you to give me three bands. And I would. Yes. Did I love that movie? It's a movie and the soundtrack to that movie was is fucking rad. Infinite. That was the point of the show. I would take three bands you like and I would make a mix based on the bands

Starting point is 00:16:27 I think you would like. And then I'd play a song for you at the end that you'd never heard to get your opinion on. And we talk about your three favorite bands. Can you see why I went nowhere? Yeah, it sounds really niche and not like you could consistently hear the same style of music. We all can't start amazing fucking bands called military guns and be like weirdly prolific in like a three year period. As I tried. OK, I'm tried.

Starting point is 00:16:53 Most of us just make a serious show with the first thought they had. Yeah. Take the name from a movie. You go. It was called in. And ask people what their favorite color is. I have you on. I ask you what your favorite color is. I hear you're a blue guy. Every every everyone's like, how do you get into punk music? Yeah, yeah, same thing.

Starting point is 00:17:14 Dude, I that nothing get these little things get stuck in my head. And I will walk around doing your. Oh, oh, hell, yeah. It is the fucking best. And I will walk around doing your. Oh, oh, hell yeah. It is the fucking best. I have that with I have that with certain like stand up comedians, like certain like bits like from specials that are pretty famous that I'll just walk around. I'll just say like Louie had that joke about the dog, like the guy that's walking his dog and he had a phone

Starting point is 00:17:45 and the leash was going like that. And I'll just walk around, I'll be like doing the dishes and go, oh, it's like a dog phone. Like, I'll just say that. I'm gonna fucking kill myself. I'm gonna fucking kill myself. I'm gonna fucking kill myself. I'm gonna fucking kill myself.

Starting point is 00:17:57 Acuna. Acuna. Acuna. I'm still getting mail from someone named Emmanuel Acuna. Really? Yeah. I was just going to say, yeah. Wow. Grady and stick alike. No, I love songs. Do Warren's Yvonne is a big.

Starting point is 00:18:15 I'm going to hold a fucking knife. Like I love. Yeah, yeah. Oh, I love that. The it's what's funny is I don't feel like I have any ownership over the the thing because I just view it as traditional to rock and roll music. Right. Like if you listen to like the Beatles, there's a song on on Let It Be where it is like like

Starting point is 00:18:38 Paul hits an o on the song. Yes. Yes. Yes. On a new new new new. What song is it? I don't remember what song. Fuck. I have it on the tip of my tongue me it's like just like it is Accented sound is

Starting point is 00:18:51 What you have a few personalized it you did it twice. I did it twice. I don't know. It's not yeah Like reality unfolds when on the the demo Justice goes like ohs when on the demo, Justice goes like, ooh! And then on the biggest kiss goodnight, it's like, ah! Yeah. And you do a ooh, ooh!

Starting point is 00:19:15 Yeah. And it's different. Give yourself some credit. Thank you, thanks. It's a different ooh. It is and it isn't, you know? Yeah. Well, it gets stuck up in my head.

Starting point is 00:19:22 If you listen to Death Metal, it's ooh, ooh, ooh. All the time, you know? Oh, yeah. it gets stuck up in my head. If you listen to Death Metal, it's like, ooh, all the time. Ooh, yeah. Like Cookie Monster, kind of like, urr. My grandmom ripped up my Cannibal Corpse vile CD when I was in sixth grade, and she threw out my Howard Cerns private parts and made me go see a priest

Starting point is 00:19:38 because she thought I was being overtaken by the devil. Oh, my God. My parents thought I was gay because at one dinner. They saw your outfit. At one dinner. Did you have something like that? One time you do it. Yeah, that could be that could be your thing.

Starting point is 00:19:56 That'll be my thing. I'm going to do stand up now and I'll you'll know the jokes are over when I hit those. Do it. You go. And that's why my wife is pregnant. Oh, oh, oh, oh. I brought my parents. Oh, hey, hey. One time I brought my parents the chronic and some forty

Starting point is 00:20:12 ones all killer, no filler. Amazing. And my parents were like, I know to the chronic. No to all killer, no filler. But they were not into it. Really? My mom found my no effects war on Errorism CD and just shattered it. Really? Yeah, she opened it up and read the lyrics and we're like, this is bullshit and broken apart.

Starting point is 00:20:30 Oh, dude, my mom did that with my White Zombie CD, Astro Creep. So you can tell the age gap here. Yeah. Well, she didn't read the lyrics. I lit a match in the house when she wasn't home and I thought I wouldn't get caught. And then she came home.

Starting point is 00:20:44 That was the crime, was just a match. Ian's just sitting there. He's like, yes. He goes, this feels good. All right, well, I'll tell you what I did. I lit a match and then to get rid of the smell, I sprayed mace. Oh my God.

Starting point is 00:20:57 Jesus. And then the- So the story sounded like she could smell the match. She could smell the mace. She smelled a lot of smells coming from her house. She didn't exist. She got maced in her eyes and she's crying. And you're like, mom, don't cry. It was just a match. Yeah. And then, you know, the cat was just on a knife.

Starting point is 00:21:13 I was like, I'm sorry. Sorry. That wasn't funny. Why did I say that? I don't know. I saw the knife and tried to punch it up. Yeah. Welcome to my fucking life. What? Sucking? So I do the next day at school. My mom made me go see the guidance counselor. I'll never forget. He sits me down and goes, so Ian. Lighten matches now, are we? It's a dangerous.

Starting point is 00:21:37 Like, like in New York, matches are like huge problems. Very Delaware. Yes, matches are like in warming to Delaware. it's like, this is terrible, you know? But I just was waiting for an interview, like I've seen it happen before, first thing your line matches and you're blowing the soccer deproxy. You don't want it to happen, stop it now. The match to Oxxie Piper. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:21:59 And then, yeah, she took my White Zombie CD, broke that. Breaking it is so just dramatic. Well, my grandmom also found I had a folder with, oh no, I think it was like Space Jam or something. It was like a Space Jam folder, but on the inside it was printed out lyrics to Korn. So all their lyrics, and they had a song called Cunt. And the lyrics are just like ass itch cunt bitch blah

Starting point is 00:22:25 blah and so my family thought I was like infected by devils and they tried to have an exorcism with me they brought these yeah they brought these Jamaican Baptist women to my grandparents house and they prayed over me and it wasn't working but I felt bad so I just started to be like oh But I felt bad so I just started to be like, oh, no fucking way. So they were like, it's working. Oh, a boy's got a devil in him. Oh, that boy's got some demon tings. Yeah, literally.

Starting point is 00:22:52 They go, it's working, it's working. And they start chanting louder. They're like, I'm done my hee my my. They're doing reggaeton. Dude, religion is sick. It's crazy. It's so crazy. It's crazy.

Starting point is 00:23:03 So sick. We got a boy with a demon. Ding a ding ding. Yeah, that's just me like listening to corn adidas all day long. So yeah, you should have done the the. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that should have been the exorcism sound. I should just be like, twist, twist.

Starting point is 00:23:22 It's so funny, man. Like every time I think I got you pinpointed, you say another fucked up thing that happened to you that I never even knew about. Thank you, thank you. Jesus. Yeah, having those women pray over me was insane. Yeah, man, you're fucked up.

Starting point is 00:23:36 And then we all had like, oxtail for dinner. It was fucking great. Sounds like a great day. Yeah, wait, why'd your dad think you were gay? So it was like dinner. I had the grandparents over and everyone's trying to. Engage me as a youth, talk to me. What what's what music are you like in these days?

Starting point is 00:23:52 And I was like, well, the circle jerks, the buzzcocks. I swear. And it was like just the shit I'd been listening to. But I was like, you're like, huh? Circle jerks really stuck with them as far as like, yeah, yeah. That's a yeah, I like the circle. Jerks are all servers. I love the circle jerks, the Buzzcocks. Every time I have sex with a woman, I think it's a man band.

Starting point is 00:24:17 You know, like limp wrist. Like, at one point, at one point, the gay cover band thing, I really did like. What was that? Like, use it to gay, black fag, like. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Gay Rilla biscuits. Yeah. That's a stretch.

Starting point is 00:24:33 That one was a stretch. They're all real bands. These are all real bands. Yeah, was that, the queers weren't, they were just the band. They were just the band. Yeah. Pansy division was were just the bad guys. Yeah Pansy division great band though. Yes. These were daylighting a dollar short These were like cover bands like they would do covers, but they were yeah, they did a gay

Starting point is 00:24:55 That's a gay version No, no So we're the gay really? You got a big dick You got a big dick. Let me suck it. You got a big dick sucker suck today New gay rection With the trumpet, you know? Hehehehe Fuck you, Civ Whoa, whoa, whoa

Starting point is 00:25:26 I love Civ! He's on the podcast, running the show Hey, joking! He's the best! I love Civ! Okay He's alright, Walter's great too! I love Walter! I love Civ! Hehehe

Starting point is 00:25:42 Dude, I forget who, someone was telling me a story They like, were on tour with, they were on tour with Tenacious D and they were like in the green room and Kyle Gass was like, hey, it's got some grass. You want to smoke? And I can't. We'll smoke a blunt with Kyle Gass. So they all smoke and he leaves. And then they go out to Jack Black. Like, hey, do you want to smoke a joint? He goes, yeah, but do me a favor. Don't give this to Kyle.

Starting point is 00:26:07 We just got out of rehab for weed. Oh, yeah, man. No problem. Oh, my God. It's like our side stage and the like one of the opening bands is Kyle's just dipping his hand in like vegetable and sour cream and just like so highly eating it. They're like, oh no Rest in peace is tenacious D. Yeah, they're gonna get back together jack black sold his boy out, right?

Starting point is 00:26:32 Through him under the bus. Well, we don't know kind of a weirdo to be honest. Yeah black seems like yeah He's that famous man. He's got to like he's got a way But also when you're you got to back your boy you've been in a band Yeah, of course like the past 30 years and when you're that famous you're not gonna lose anything It was a bit of a knee. I think that borderlands flopped because What's that video game movie movie yeah exactly see flopped I didn't know about it Yeah, 150 million dollar, 30 million return. Ooh, wow. That's bad.

Starting point is 00:27:08 Yeah, one of the biggest flops. Oh, my God. What would you do if you and I... Jordan and I have a handshake. We have an agreement. If she goes down, I go down. If I go down, she goes down. Yeah, of course. You go down with your boys. You can't throw your shit. But we also don't know what happened.

Starting point is 00:27:23 Like, we don't know what's going on with them. We don't know, no one really knows what the fuck. Maybe they were like, I don't want to do this anymore. And they're like, ah fuck it, let's just not do it anymore. It canceled the rest of the tour? Yeah. Yeah, I don't really know what I'm talking about.

Starting point is 00:27:38 One of them has a lot less money than the other. More like big dog brain. Come here. This guy is a, Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr the gas leaks get into us. Yeah, I don't know. If you're like that rich, then what do you have really to worry about? I don't know, but I will say Tropic Thunder is one of the greatest movies of all time. I was watching that again the other day.

Starting point is 00:28:13 Dude, when Jack Black is strung up against a tree. And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's like, that is force coming down the pipeline. Yeah. You got a big role for you just on timing. I love when people rediscover Tropic Thunder every couple months and get angry again. Oh dude, they're like, Iron Man is blackface, what is this?

Starting point is 00:28:35 Have you heard, so there's a movie that Jamie Foxx apparently has directed where Robert Downey Jr. plays a Mexican. Really? Oh yeah. But it's just being held. Yeah. Like it's just being held. Yeah. Like it's finished. No way. But they're like, we have to wait

Starting point is 00:28:48 till the right time to release it. So I wonder how much money they spent on that movie, like for it to just be held, but. Wow. They're like, we can't do it again. We're gonna get in trouble. I wonder what the plot of that is. And also, I think they should just take

Starting point is 00:28:59 Robert Downey Jr. through Epcot and just be like, be this country person, be this person. Just spin a reel and make him a wheel. Make him be. Well they kind of just did that with the show, but he plays all white guys in the show, the interpreter or something like that. He plays a bunch of different guys.

Starting point is 00:29:15 The poster's like him is like six different guys. I don't know, but having people find out about that is hilarious the same way when people find out about Eminem. And they're like, this guy's lyrics are really bad. Oh, yeah, they just go to kill you. Well, that was one of those. I was going to mention that during the conversation, but it like passed. But another album that my mom bought for my birthday was the Marshall Mathers LP

Starting point is 00:29:35 censored was listened to it on the ride to my house to when everybody was celebrating my birthday, went back to Best Buy and returned it. Well, you can return an open CD. Back then, if your mom's mad at Long Island enough, it's like brand new. I guess they could be like, can you just, I don't know. I think my bookie is here to say this football season stop being a baby. Play some bets on the game already with my bookie. Couldn't be easier.

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Starting point is 00:30:42 Double your money with code SKA before you even place a bet. My bookie plus is the lock of the century bet on anything, anywhere, anytime and make your season a winning season. Do it. Bye bye. When my mom bought me a devil without a cause by Kid Rock, the uncensored version, which my mom would would bounce between not carrying and carrying depending on where alcoholism was at right at the time and uh we were checking out at the counter and i had the cd so it's like you know like me peeking up i was probably like third grade yeah

Starting point is 00:31:19 and uh i was like peeking up over the thing and they're like she's like all right put put your thing and i like put the kid rock cd on the counter and the person at the counter went Are you sure and my mom's like what the fuck did you just say? like so upset like Yes ready to fight this person for asking if that it was okay to buy Why even do that? That's what a new are fired for that shit What a dick I went away to Camp Tioga sleepaway camp when I was in seventh grade. That's cool and I

Starting point is 00:31:57 Was really homesick. I was like crying all the time and didn't they make a movie about that heavyweight? Cunha. Why do you say his name after that? Gay conversion. Why do you say his name after that? Oh, no. No, no. You know what? Hey, get out of here, you guys. No, but I went to summer camp, and my parents were really big on not giving me the uncensored version, and I was so homesick, and the camp costed like a couple of grand, so they were

Starting point is 00:32:33 like, don't come home. We can't have, please don't come home. And I'm like, the only way I'm not coming home is if you get me Ludacris's word of mouth, and I need it to be uncensored. And they're like, all right. And like you replay it. It is a good play. It is a good play. And the tracks are like move, bitch. And like just it was like they were like, oh, God. And then they sent it to me.

Starting point is 00:32:58 And guess what I did? Still went home. Man, kids are pieces. kids are pieces of shit. I know. Dude, my cousins, I'll never forget, they got me, they weren't blood. They were like, you know when your parents are best friends with someone so they're like your aunt and uncle and then they're kids are your cousins. In the fight you never see them again.

Starting point is 00:33:18 Dude. My life. Yeah, you just have a fractured family. What happened to the what happened to Andy and Dean? Right. We don't see them anymore. Oh, OK. That's not going to affect me. Yeah. Cool. Right. Right. Can't wait for that to really fuck me up. Yeah. Yeah. So I was at their house and I'll never forget. We listened to Flaming Lips, And I'll never forget, we listened to Flaming Lips,

Starting point is 00:33:48 she don't use jelly, it's called Vaseline. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we listened to Vaseline, then we listened to Weezer, and then they go, you gotta hear this. They put on Adam Sandler, What the Hell Happened to Me, and it changed my life. And they put on- Ruined your life. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:34:02 Well, it's the reason I'm here. It's funny, people say it changed my life. Never really- Yeah, I didn't really think of it that way. Yeah, Well, it's the reason I'm here. It's funny. People say it changed my life. I never really. Yeah, I didn't really think it would ruin it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I should have a family. You had a bright future. I shouldn't be in a basement, decorated in the basement. I was clearly molested in. I should have children and a family.

Starting point is 00:34:21 I went to school to be a teacher, but this album changed my life. And I wasn't molested. Anyway, so I know we all were. I listened to They're All Gonna Laugh You, right? And so, you know, did you guys listen to his albums growing up? Is that the one with You Gotta gotta wash the cock and balls? Yes. I only a friend had one CD, but I didn't listen.

Starting point is 00:34:51 I just was a big fan of the movies more than this. They do. It was the best, but they would go like sketch, track, sketch, track, song, sketch, track, sketch, track, song. So he only played the songs for me. So I heard the songs. I was like, this is funny. So I go, mom, can I please get this tape? And she was like, if you do X, Y, Z,

Starting point is 00:35:10 I'll take you to the store and we'll get you a tape. I was like, okay. So she gets me, they're all going to laugh at you. And I didn't know that it had these sketches. And the first sketch is a assistant principals, a big day. And the conceit is that the principal isn't there. So assistant principal is taking over and he's making the announcements. He's like, I am in charge today. And first order of business, the boys gymnastics team shower will be moved to my office.

Starting point is 00:35:39 And I advise you to shower and do not stop even if you look over and see me masturbating. Second order of business. Things used to be so much more low brow. It was like, I need the girls volleyball team to shove a shampoo bottle up my ass. And my mom, dude, we're driving home and she's like, what the fuck is this? And I'm like, I don't know. I don't know.

Starting point is 00:36:03 And she, I'll never forget, she took the tape out and threw it out the truck window. So I had to go back to the store and steal it. Yep. Hell yeah, dude. What do you mean, low brow? That's fucking- Don't take it like that. No, wait, no.

Starting point is 00:36:20 No, take it exactly, no. It's low brow. Yeah, it sucked. No, I mean, take it like that. It's lowbrow. Yeah, it sucked. Right. Right. You guys. If you like that, you're stupid. Guess what? Me, me, me. Dude, that was like, yes. Yeah, sure. Lowbrow. But there were other ones. It was very fun like the excited Southerner

Starting point is 00:36:48 Okay Applies for college and Conan O'Brien's the Dean. I never had the I never had CDs I just would watch call me central presents or just call me central all the time So that was like Santa but Adam Sandler wasn't on now call me central So it was like I, probably didn't even know besides like the Hanukkah song. I probably didn't know that. I was raised on-

Starting point is 00:37:10 I remember hearing a lot of his songs when I was younger. I can't remember him now, but I do, I did hear quite a bit. I was raised on Adam Sandler's songs and sketches, the Jerky Boys and then like Dirty Work. That was, I mean, that was like right in my wheelhouse. And Blink 182. Yeah. So just guys that was like right in my wheelhouse. All right. And Blink 182. Yeah. You know, like those guys that are like balls and shit and fucking cock. Woo. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:37:32 Did you see? Sorry we didn't listen to the bugs. Cock prank. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry we didn't listen to Beethoven's stand up special over here. Come on, don't do that. I got you. I got you. You laugh, you laugh. I'm gonna start sitting like this. I'm gonna say a joke and I'm gonna go, right Ian?

Starting point is 00:37:50 You're the funniest. No one's funnier. Beethoven's stand up special. End on a high note, okay. Did you see Sandler's new special? Yeah, no, I've been waiting to watch it. It's so good, man. I've been waiting to watch it.

Starting point is 00:38:04 He's two for two. His last one was so good yeah yeah the piano yeah yeah yeah this one's supposed to be curious if if like Josh safety would like what the in because it gets interrupted a lot I won't say a lot yeah I wonder what is what he's in on because I feel like as a good piece of directing, I'd be like, just so you know, we're going to do we're going to fuck with you while it's happening. Right. Man, like because it seems very organic and like he actually is on his it feels like he's on his heels for for a little bit of it. Yeah. It makes it that much better.

Starting point is 00:38:41 Yeah. Yeah. Awesome. Like, I wonder if the TV screens are actually supposed to work. Yeah. Or the dog. I wonder if the TV screens are actually supposed to work Yeah, or the dog like maybe they don't know Like Sandman I I defend everything of his I've watched it twice always I Like his Netflix movies even yeah, bro

Starting point is 00:39:04 I saw Jack and Jill in theaters twice Bro. I love everything he does. Howie Halloween, not too bad. Howie Halloween. Howie Halloween. That's amazing. I was like, this is pretty good. I saw Jack and Jill in theaters twice. I was about to ask if Jack was a big Jack and Jill fan. Let me tell you, Jack and Jill, Nobody Believes Me, incredible slapstick comedy. It's a classic slapstick comedy. If you get a chance, re-watch Jack and Jill,

Starting point is 00:39:21 take it from what it is. It's a silly, stupid, It is so funny, so funny. And his movies are so funny and they have these heartfelt moments. It's I think he is such a well rounded example of what like a comic comedian person should. Yeah, should be. I try to do a bit about That's My Boy on stage. Really? Oh, that movie. That's a great movie too.

Starting point is 00:39:47 So good. Because we it's not even fucking great. So but on but but on stage I was like, have you guys seen That's My Boy? And I was like, it's a movie that's like, what if pedophilia was sick? Because that's kind of the conceit of the movie is that like Adam Sandler. That was a great delivery. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, because it is like, yeah, he's like a fucking bro that screws his teacher. And you're like, that's what the movie is the result of.

Starting point is 00:40:13 Totally. And how did everyone take it? No laughs. It was pretty bad. How did you recover from that? Speaking of being on your heels. See, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we that's why you'll really lay into someone if you oh, yeah What we do is I just get to move on I feel bad for my band members because they'll I'll go start making noise. Yeah, I just like I'll really Great DJ no one. Yeah, I start following a thread and I'll talk for a while sometimes it has to be the right night But especially if I'm drinking and I'm like, oh, yeah, And that's why you'll really lay into someone if you. Oh, yeah. Those are like those blink guys have it like down pat where it's like they just say something

Starting point is 00:40:53 and you just have to go like you just have Travis play something. They have a crazy rhythm with it. Yeah, I saw. Fuck. It was one of the worst shows I ever saw. It was Aquabats were there. They were great, but they played for like an hour and 15 minutes. And I was like... Way too much Aquabats. When I turn on Aquabats, I get through three songs and I go, I'm good for another year. At least. Right.

Starting point is 00:41:14 Shark Fighter, Super Rad, and Super Rad Reprise. But I saw them, Les and Jake, and Balling for Soup. And it was rough. God, I love Scott. I'll never turn my back on him. But man, this show, it was... Les and Jake, I think, is the best of the three. Right.

Starting point is 00:41:36 They just phoned it in. It was just like... Imagine having to play those songs for 20 years. Yeah, of course. Imagine keeping dreads for that long. Yeah. Yeah. And your name's Roger. I'm seeing Bowling for Soup on Sunday. Really? Where at? Irving Plaza I think. Who are they playing with? I don't know. Are they headlining? Yeah they're headlining. Good for them.

Starting point is 00:41:55 Dude, good for them. It was so funny though because they had like a joke off and they were like the worst like long-winded street jokes but But I was laughing so hard imagining like, okay, Matt, what's your joke? And he's like, a black, a Jew, and a priest. Walk into it, and everyone's like, no! You know, because all the other ones were like, what does a girl say to a boo-boo? And everyone's like, hey.

Starting point is 00:42:22 They were just doing like bar jokes? Yeah, they were like simple like kid jokes. These are the Aquabats? No, no, no, this is Bowling for jokes. Yeah, they were like simple, like kid. This is the Aquabats. No, no, no. This is bowling for Sue. But I just thought it'd be so funny for one of them to just mask off. I feel like it's the most offensive joke. Three N words walking to a Jew place.

Starting point is 00:42:35 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which band does has that bit where he starts to tell an offensive joke in the guitar? Oh, 1975. 1975. Yeah. Oh, really? Oh, that's great. He goes, he'll just start it and then they'll start like the songs shout out Matty Fan of the show he is yeah, I fucking love the 1975. They're fucking great. I'm not if you're watching this him yet. Yeah Let's go hit Ian Yeah, this is being Ian with Ian. Thank you

Starting point is 00:43:01 Thank you for being a fan of the show 1975 shout out I with Ian. Thank you for watching. Thank you for being a fan of the show. It's a show that we're going here. 1975. Shout out. I. I'm trying to think of any band whose banter made me be like, yeah, so the fence family. So Patrick Kinlan, Patrick's great. He was well, drug church.

Starting point is 00:43:24 He does like this like weird hype man like that's really fake for him thing that I don't enjoy. Self defense, he's like a human being on stage and it's awesome. What was the Hitler bit? Friendly Show 2, shout out Patrick. So I played drums for self defense family for a while and he, like every night I never knew if we'd be in trouble the next day. Oh, you know, like that.

Starting point is 00:43:47 It was really fun to be a part of because everything was so boring at the time. And it just was like, yeah, I don't know. Pack and really like we can make news tomorrow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Pat pissing someone off. And yeah, we literally we were in Germany for a long time. And he none of his speeches went well because Language barrier right and Germans suck and they just don't get come and all then I get do Germans don't get music either

Starting point is 00:44:15 They don't they don't they're not very smart They so so we get to the UK and Pat is like elated because people speak English and do comedy there. And is relieving. Yeah. When you cross back into the UK, you're like, oh, thank God. Human beings always almost get to the border. They're like, can I tell you a joke?

Starting point is 00:44:37 Oh, thank God. More animatronic asses. And literally, Pat does a Hitler impression on stage. He's like, he's like, you guys want to see my Michael Caine? And then and then he does a terrible Michael Caine. It's not even close. And then he goes, what about this one? And he starts speaking like fake German really loud and stomping,

Starting point is 00:44:56 but not doing any stuff. And and I was like, wow, I am standing right behind it. I'm sitting right behind a man doing a Hitler impression right now. Leaving Germany like he was inspired. Yeah. You could help and just do a rim shot after everything. Yeah. Jokes, but I'm pissed. But I'm pissed. But then your participant, you know. I know. Right.

Starting point is 00:45:17 But it was. Yeah, Patrick. So I I did not like self-defense family. And then I went to see them live. And part of it, the appeal was it was before I knew him or anything else and I Became a huge fan because of him. Like he was the appeal of the band. So that's one of the rare He's such a fun guy to talk to. Yeah, he's like so interesting and he was also like an amazing comic book Writer and everything. It's really cool

Starting point is 00:45:43 It's the best I drug church did. Well, they didn't do, but they were kind enough to give me a licensing to my Opik their song for the end of the special. Oh, that's awesome. Really cool. Yeah. And King nine too. Let me use a art of war to come up to you. That's so cool. Yeah. Yeah. It was really cool. You even have to license it for YouTube. You have to get like permission and have like, you have to go back and forth like the label

Starting point is 00:46:06 and there are like these things you have to go through when you're putting it out that says it's okay from XYZ. We like have dealt with that with like skate videos to some degree, but I never know what, like what, cause you could just put it, the people just upload songs with stuff on it. You're like, that's so- So fucked up how quickly you can get demonetized

Starting point is 00:46:24 and your shit can get taken down. Yeah, that's the fucked up thing. They'll take your fucking money away. We keep getting, we're not getting demonetized, but we're getting kind of like limited ads. Limited. Yeah. And they don't tell you why.

Starting point is 00:46:39 They don't give you a reason. And there's almost a vibe. If you ask, they're going to, they'll be like, they'll punish you for that. They'll take it away. They'll punish you for reason. And there's almost a vibe. If you ask, they're going to, they'll be like, they'll punish you for that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Apparently you're not supposed to like cuss or mention certain first minutes. Yeah. Yeah. But it's like, I, we, we actually tried to do, we had Patrick and Eric from worst possible timeline his podcast. We had them on the podcast and we had just found this out. And that was

Starting point is 00:47:04 the episode that we were like, all right, we have to like not cuss for the first 10 minutes. And all of us were like, but why don't hold me back? This is China's fault. And because they are taking over, you can only censor it. Yeah. But no, we're not a censored. We, we, but you know what? I do that, but we don't act like, don actually you can't you can't have both What are you my fucking manager that I say this to every day and he says I don't I don't think there is that that Problem with censoring your podcast in the way that you're looking at it. It's also not like there's deep thoughts here It's not this is not censorship in the way that matters. You just go look for the first 10 minutes.

Starting point is 00:47:48 No, no, no. Listen, you lowbrow fucking dick. OK, all right. Sorry, I didn't know you wanted to come on here and talk policy. All right. I have concepts. Well, you know, this whole thing is we've got a few concepts. But people, yeah, people get this. I think it's really frustrating because a part of speaking freely is if you cuss or if you say something that in this moment is funny, but someone can deem as wrong later

Starting point is 00:48:18 or whatever, to penalize that is I think horse shit because this is a comedy podcast. Everything we're saying is for the goal of humor and laughter. So all we're talking about is profanity. It's like it's like little kid words. Yeah, that's the thing. And that shouldn't we shouldn't be penalized for when there's legitimate videos all over YouTube of girls like showing their pussies or like on YouTube. Yes, yes.

Starting point is 00:48:45 What do you get off? There is there is there is there is there's a whole fucking pedophile way. Yeah, that that they they do they find videos. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, but if okay, I don't know shit about what you're talking Are not monetized You are looking for money They're monetized there's home videos Time with these videos that you know that they're monetized. I have done extensive research.

Starting point is 00:49:27 He goes, ah, these fucking ads, man. I have spent a lot of time. No, there's, on Instagram even, there is, you sound like my dad. Like, it is like, yeah, and your dad brought a gun to a show and he sounds pretty fucking cool. Trust me, trust me, Sharia Law is coming. That's, I wouldn't say that. That's what you, that's what you sound like right now. Okay, but that's not funny because it's already here.

Starting point is 00:49:49 So. I think you guys. Which, if you talk to these fucking yapping hands, it might be a good thing. Okay? This is so off the rails. This turns into a different person. What? Bring up your discrepancy. It's saying like shit

Starting point is 00:50:11 and piss is not worth like for 10 minutes is not. Well, you don't have to censor piss. Yeah, I think you guys are both right in the sense that it sucks that we have to live in this world that's so safe for children all of a sudden because we can't say fucking balls. Well, it's not your ride because what we can't say fucking ball. Like, you know, who gives a shit? We're not saying anything. I'm going to be honest. I'm going to be honest. I kind of forgot what we're talking about. I did too. Let's just move on. What I'm saying is there's a secret cabal, okay, and they want blood.

Starting point is 00:50:46 A YouTube cabal. A YouTube cabal. Well, no, no. It's a cabal of YouTubers. What pisses me off is it was Dr. Disrespect, he was there. I don't know that guy. Who's that guy? You don't know Dr. Disrespect?

Starting point is 00:51:00 No. John Monopoly was there. Who's that guy? Is that a real person? Yeah, these are all guys that I know. I know Dr. Disrespect, but I don't know any of these other guys. They're all YouTubers this respect now. John Monopoly was there. Is that a real person? Yeah, these are all guys I don't doctor disrespect, but I don't know Yeah, I'm not the Monopoly guy

Starting point is 00:51:12 The Monopoly guy the little guy the little guy with the board his name's John Monopoly I want to do his own Park place Who's John Monopoly? Don't be is he asking the wrong questions. You gotta follow the money. Wow. This is spooky. I like this. Yeah. Okay, let's follow the money.

Starting point is 00:51:33 Not right now. That they're not giving us. I have a feeling he's a horrible because you're not smart enough to handle ten minutes of not saying bad words. Oh, I'm fucking smart enough. I just don't want to do it because when I'm down here it because I okay yeah I have an actual thought. On profanity. I hear myself use profanity on podcasts and I'm like I sound so stupid and I'm trying so hard to not c I say I'm failing I've said a lot of profanities on this very podcast And I'll regret them later. Hmm No regrets yeah, Wilson will he reads you've said three things I

Starting point is 00:52:20 Say we treat this like an oasis song and we don't look back in anger say it and Like like a like a turkey cooker you sell at midnight on late night TV set it and many at it too many Too many guys named Ron Papel Whatever anyway, I just think it's ridiculous that there you're penalized for certain things Especially with the algorithm in terms of like, well, completely fucking die. If you mentioned a certain topic, you say a certain thing in your standup clip. So you then have to say you have to caption

Starting point is 00:52:56 the like, you can't say sex, you have to spell it. S E G G S or say like, on a live on a lot. It's like this is clearly like, I know I'm going to sound like a fucking hack, but it's clearly 1984, like double speak crazy that we all just go along with this at the same time. Cut to people who have actual problems and like, that literally can't say anything. I'm not saying it's a huge, I'm just saying it's, it's an eye roll and it's annoying and it's stupid. And for anyone to go like, well, there's, we have freedom of speech. It's like, no, we don't and it's stupid. And for anyone to go like, well, we have freedom of speech. It's like, no, we don't.

Starting point is 00:53:27 It's annoying, but it's only the problem when you're looking to get paid. That's my only thing. It's annoying when you want to get money. Right. And guess what? I made this choice. I chose to get involved in this line of work. I didn't know it was going to turn out to be like this. So I shouldn't complain. I'm not like, woe is me. But I am saying it is for us.

Starting point is 00:53:46 This is how what do you sponsors for the podcast? Yeah. You do ad read ad. Dr. Disrespect. They don't care if we can't monopoly my bookie dot com. Hello fresh, by the way. Do you guys you guys travel and it's probably hard to cook. You guys should get a deliver to each hotel. No, it's just frustrating to see how things have gone in terms of censorship and it all serves these big corporations. And at the same time, we are all like kind of slowly just turn it like I tried to do these clips on Instagram where it looked like like nineties, like skate videos,

Starting point is 00:54:22 like VHS and Instagram, the algorithm like completely ding me. It's low quality. It's isn't that. So it's any time you try to go outside these like weird little guidelines, it's like, no, no, no. Just be more like the same of everything else. And that's what's frustrating. That's what I find frustrating. And then also, like you do that and you're like, okay, can't beat him. I'll join him kind of thing. And then you get fucking people in the comments being like, why are you censoring the word white man or something like that? Yeah. But then it's like you you then play the game and you still don't win. And you're like, well, I should have never done it anyway. It's just frustrating. Yeah, I feel like I've gone through that with like feeling really demoralized

Starting point is 00:54:59 by trying really hard on stuff and then being like, yeah, we got like, barely anything out of it. But at the end of the day, it's self-elected. So I just say like self-elected things I just try not to complain about in ways where I'm like, oh yeah, I made a fool's errand for myself. It's no one else's fault that I made the fool's errand. I chose all of this and so I am aware that these are my choices and I've got to navigate and change with the

Starting point is 00:55:30 times and I am. I can find myself complaining sometimes, but you know, it's like, what's the point? But it is also like with YouTube, like we, when people put out specials, it was like, this is a place where a network isn't going to tell you what to do. You're going to get your thing out, say whatever you want. And then now it's like, well, you're not going to get boosted in the algorithm because you said this part in your set that was this. And it's like, well, I'm doing standup to say what I want. I'm putting it on your platform. And so that's what's frustrating. I think we're in a moment of change. I will say this as well.

Starting point is 00:56:05 I think too much content is about content creation now, so I try to like, fuck that. Let's keep it invisible from the audience as best as we can. Well, I also think trying to make so much content won't make you content. And guys, that's kind of the lesson that we take. Okay.

Starting point is 00:56:22 Okay. That's kind of the lesson that we Know but at the end of the day everything's amazing everything is wonderful. Everything's terrible, but at the end of the day, everything's amazing. Everything is wonderful. Everything's terrible, but everything's getting better and worse. I mean, everything sucks and we're all gonna die, but in a way that's like wonderful. So you mean, why is it wonderful? Because if you know you're gonna die, then why would you leave anything on the table?

Starting point is 00:56:59 Why wouldn't you just do everything you wanna do and fucking live? The irony of saying, why would you leave anything on the table with the messiest table in the world? They can't see the table, asshole. Wait, this isn't set decoration? That's not even in the shot?

Starting point is 00:57:13 It's in the shot. Some of it is. It's in the shot. Oh my god, that's unfortunate. That's just a damn bitch you live like this? No, I don't live down here. And live upstairs. He just gets molested down here No, how fucking white my legs are

Starting point is 00:57:29 That's because i've never seen you in shorts Yeah, you gotta say things into the mic you just started wearing shorts, right? Yes, throw a curse word in there No, don't do it Don't do it well. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo to the Laugh Factory and the Comedy Store with him. Oh dude, that's the best. Chappelle's the fucking best, man. I love him so much. That must have been so fun. It was, yeah. We went to Swingers beforehand. That's the spot. We always go to Swingers. We did the whole West Hollywood night.

Starting point is 00:58:16 Yes, yes. Yeah, come. We'll go to Baby's All Right. You guys will be done in what time? We're done by 10. Amazing. I go on at 11. Yeah, I looked at the lineup. Okay, cool We'll be able to get there and then hang we'll eat upstairs and what room are you in? McDougal nice. Yeah, you want come what are you doing? I got a spot at New York Comedy Club on the Upper West Side at 830, but I can come by after all right Yeah, I'm hang yeah. Yeah, that'll be really fun. Yeah, it'd be great Do you get to do shit like that like well usually usually it we're incredibly anti-social Yeah, yeah, we don't really hang out the bands. We tour with like we are I

Starting point is 00:58:56 Don't know what's wrong with us. We just I Listen to headphones almost the entire day like so when we got off stage, I'll put headphones back on. Yeah. Will is really anti-social. He doesn't even talk to us usually. And yeah, I don't know. We just like we did this tour with the story so far and we didn't really hang out with them until the last day of the tour.

Starting point is 00:59:22 We're like, this was awesome. Why don't we do this every night? And then we're like, well, see you never again. So do you, uh, what are you going to tour with regional justice center or what's going to happen? It's going to be like a weekend model. God, I see it. Cause that one's just like, we all, we're all very busy.

Starting point is 00:59:40 So yeah. Yeah. The record comes out next Friday. The new record. Yeah. Freedom, freedom, freedom. What's it called? Freedom, sweet freedom. Must not be about shows on YouTube. It's about how the only freedom is in death.

Starting point is 00:59:55 Yes. And that's what makes things wonderful. Yeah. Right. I don't know. No. I think it makes things bad. You think? I don't know. I wish there were more freedom. I have no answer. My whole thing is I don't got an answer. I don't think it makes things bad. You think? I don't know. I wish there were more freedom. I have no answer. My whole thing is I don't got an answer.

Starting point is 01:00:08 I don't have an answer. I think it makes things neutral. Yeah. Just embrace the ways you're not free and fucking move on. And I said a cuss word again. Yeah. Who's the fucking lowbrow moron now? I know.

Starting point is 01:00:22 I'm trying. I do. I think I sound lowbrow when I use profanities. You don't. I sound cool? Yeah, you do sound cool. You do sound cool. It sounds very cool.

Starting point is 01:00:32 Can I get a cig? Let's get him a cigarette. Oh, do you smoke down here? Yeah, you want one? Can we all just light up a cig? Yeah, you want one? Where the hell'd they go? I'm just gonna smoke a cigarette

Starting point is 01:00:41 and be coughing like crazy. You want one? Yeah, let's have one. Yeah, and then we'll wrap up after we smoke cigs and be coughing like crazy. Do you want one? Yeah, let's have one. Yeah, and then we'll wrap up after we smoke six sags. I'll take one. Yes! The boys are back in town and in now man. Can you catch it in your mouth?

Starting point is 01:00:54 Aren't you one of the... I can't do it. All right. That looks cool. You acting like a walrus. Which really... Whoa! All right, if I do this, this is the cool time in the basement. Oh, such. Acting like a walrus looks really

Starting point is 01:01:12 Cool time in the basement. Oh, yeah that that happened exactly as I thought it was my cool I'm at that metal one. Yeah, yes. God. I'm so happy right now. What should we call it? Look at this. All right. Looks natural. You can be honest. You look like a natural cool guy. Don't put it in your ear. You're a liar. Oh, my God. You're going to light yourself on fire. That would be a natural cool guy thing to do, though. Put it in your ear on fire! Oh my god, you're gonna light yourself on fire!

Starting point is 01:01:45 That would be a natural cool guy thing to do though. Smoke it! Have you ever smoked with warmth? You ever have one of- You went drunk. You ever have one of these before? Yeah man. You know how to use one of these?

Starting point is 01:01:56 How's it going? Great. You like it? Everything's a nightmare. No, it's better than it was. You know what I mean? Like, would you say it gets better? Of course. But it's like, it works if you work it.

Starting point is 01:02:21 But you got to K-I-S-S. Keep it simple, stupid. Keep it simple, stupid. Keep it simple, stupid. I get to this place in sobriety where I am not complacent, but it's been, you know, it's been over nine and a half years since my last drink and the drinking wasn't the issue. The issue is me and the things that I would do and behave to lead me to a drink. And so I can see myself getting towards those things. I'm not going to pick up a drink, but I can see those old behaviors come back. And that's what the struggle is instead of being like, I don't drink. Everything's great. It's like, that's how it is for a little, but then you gotta do some fucking work. And

Starting point is 01:02:56 that work is tough to do when part of your brain is like, yeah, but you haven't drank and the stuff's going gonna bring you a drink. You're not gonna drink again, so don't do the work, so it's this constant whatever. But I did go, I was in Delaware and I went back to the place where I went to my first meeting ever when I got out of rehab. And I went to that spot, it was this meeting in the city,

Starting point is 01:03:20 I went there the other day and it was like, it's pretty cool to look at the passage of time and be like, whoa, I went there the other day, and it was like, it's pretty cool to look at the passage of time and be like, whoa, like, this is, I never thought I would be sitting in a chair in this room and not feeling the way I felt when I was sitting in that chair in that room, you know, 12 years ago, you know what I mean? So like, that was a very nice thing that I had to go and see

Starting point is 01:03:41 and so that was really, really neat. And, you know, it's like, dude, life, life is hell no matter what way you look at it. But it's pretty fucking metal to go through without leaning on anything. Yeah. But I'm also a hypocrite because I'm on SSRIs. So what is that? I got by with a little help from my friend Zoloft. McDool effects are.

Starting point is 01:04:03 Yeah. But Zoloft isn't like going to make you, you know, sleep outside. Yeah, I'm not going to like take my Zoloft and then like get someone pregnant by accident, you know, like, I took my Lamictal, I woke up in the trash. You know, so are you not drinking now? Yeah, I'm trying, trying. I'm not that far off. How are you finding it? Well, I'm trying. Trying. I'm not that far off. How are you finding it?

Starting point is 01:04:26 Well, I'm so this is weird. I was really miserable on the tour that we just did. So I wanted to drink all the time. And now our shows are like I'm like my voice is sounding the way I want. We're doing and I'm just not unhappy. So I don't care about drinking at all. Right. It's not in my brain at all.

Starting point is 01:04:45 So it's a really weird thing. But then I'm like, oh, well maybe I'll try and drink to like reassess. You know, your brain goes through a lot of problems. But then maybe that's just it trying to creep back in. But I'm like, oh. But you're like, yeah, I don't know. It's interesting.

Starting point is 01:05:02 I mean, the thing is like, we live a life of where we're given alcohol for free every day. It's hard to wake up and drink. Yeah. So do we. Like I remember on our headliner we all were like, we're not going to drink for a week. I think him and Waylon actually did. But then I get to, it'd be like load in would happen and Then it'd be like, oh, we got like four hours and nothing.

Starting point is 01:05:27 I think I'm gonna start drinking. Yeah. And, but that's how you end up like drunk every day for three months. And I'm like, okay, I don't, definitely don't wanna do that anymore. But I don't know. And you guys are like blowing up,

Starting point is 01:05:38 like things are going really well. Like a lot of wonderful feels. I feel terrible on the inside. That's how it feels for us too. Yeah, it always it's you hear these things. You're like, what world are you living in? But you just got to act as if and keep moving. Right. People come up and they're like, I love what you're doing.

Starting point is 01:05:54 This is you're you're blowing up. This is great. And you're like, I don't. I hate Wendy's at 1 a.m. last night. I cried. Yeah, one point we had McDonald's three times in one day. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, we're doing great. It's like, you know, like the only time like people say you're doing was like when you're in an interview and you're like, yeah, I mean, and we are. It's like we realistically have not much to complain about besides the fact that we signed our our own selves up, which I say ourselves. the fact that we signed our own selves up, which when I say our selves, I signed us up

Starting point is 01:06:26 for more than we humanly should be doing. And so our manager actually texted me the other day and he's like, yeah, my friend listened to a podcast and he said that you said I was trying to kill you. And I was like, did I say that? And he goes, you signed off on all of this. And I was like, did I say that? And he goes, you signed off on all of this. And I was like, I know that I did. But but yeah, you know, like it just I go to Europe.

Starting point is 01:06:52 I don't sleep. I like I'll do one day acclimated. And then the next day I'm back on US time. And like my it's just all shot. And it's like, again, self- self-elected stupid like whatever my fault but you're like dude i want to just relax yeah it turned to like oh i'm only going to drink on tour and then that's all we do all the time yeah right so you're non-stop yeah right and especially with like we guys drive and take buses so we don't know we don't take buses we are still vans too small for way too small for a bus

Starting point is 01:07:26 Yeah passenger van we wanted to give away all the money that we could make we could maybe be in a bandwagon But I think we'd still be broke. Yeah Well art art we fly everywhere and it's like, you know Drinking on a flight for me was always like drinking on a flight airports to one time I Drinking on a flight for me was always like, drinking on a flight is so fun. Airports for me were a huge thing. Dude, one time I fucking went to the wrong airport. I went to LAX instead of, my flight was out of Burbank. And I was able, I was so pumped, it was 6 a.m.

Starting point is 01:08:00 I went to the wrong airport, still made it to Burbank in enough time to smash two double Bloody Marys at 7 a.m. to get on my flight. Yes. And I was like, this is normal. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's so fun. Because for a flight, you're like, this is dead time.

Starting point is 01:08:13 Yeah. This is like nothing. What else am I going to do? There's nothing else to do. Also, there's nothing entertaining about being at an airport. I think everybody dreads even being there. Yeah, but you change a time zone and you're like, oh, I've added time. I can drink more. Yeah. So like, drinking doesn't matter. So like, drinking there is you're like, oh, I've added time, I can drink more.

Starting point is 01:08:25 Yeah, so like drinking there is like, drinking always makes. I don't know what it's like if you go west. Yeah, yeah. You're an alcoholic. I think I'm gonna have more time. Yeah, dude. Losing the hours anyway.

Starting point is 01:08:36 And then being on a flight and being like, can I get three of those little fucking liquor bottles and get blackout before we get to the bottom? We got some funny photos of the sheer amount of alcohol we've On flights. Well the last time I kind of scared myself. I accidentally took three Xanax accidentally fucking asshole, dude What were they in now? He thought it was tic-tacs Well, there was like three large men sitting next to me barefoot and I was extremely uncomfortable.

Starting point is 01:09:09 On a European flight. I was sitting like this, I had nine hours to go. I'm like, all right, take one Xanax. Like, let me get a couple of wines. I was like, I'm gonna take another Xanax and then the third Xanax I just- Oh, he just, yeah, he probably forgot about the first two. You're like me, but with- you're like hell I am, but with blue chews. probably forgot about the first two. You're like me. You're like hell I am. But with blue shoes, gas station, boner bills and like

Starting point is 01:09:27 one for you, one for me. Go cheese. There's a barefoot guy next to me. I got to take my blue shoes. Well, I mean, I just woke up when we landed. Don't remember the flights. Time travel. One of our friends that we just toured with,

Starting point is 01:09:39 though, was like, yeah, we did a flight and he drank too much with his annex and they couldn't get him up when he. Oh, God. Oh, yeah, he did a flight and he drank too much with his annex and they couldn't get him up when he landed. Oh, God. Oh, yeah, he was a rookie. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, it sucks because I don't drink anymore, but I still smoke weed.

Starting point is 01:09:53 And I do not like being high on a flight. I love being drunk. That's the only time I'm scared. Yeah, it really is. Like, if I get too high and I'm like, the chair gets too small and then I think about if somebody trips and falls and the whole plane goes down, you know what I mean?

Starting point is 01:10:08 That's not how it works. But it could. If somebody if someone big enough couldn't, if somebody. No, but it couldn't. All right. Fine. Fine. When you guys are in a flight and someone trips and falls and the whole fucking thing goes down, I hope you're thinking of me before you make peace with your god.

Starting point is 01:10:24 Look out for this new bow Boeing whistleblower Yeah, the flights actually got up the planes got a problem if you fall down It's very fragile the whole flight is very fragile smoking weed is interesting because I thought I Thought I needed it. Mm-hmm. And then one day I just never, I just haven't done it. I just didn't sense, I used to think I needed to sleep. And then I just stopped doing it one day. I'm thinking about quitting TBH.

Starting point is 01:10:56 Yeah, do it man. I don't know. I really don't. I need it to live. I try not to be judgmental, but I really don't like weed. And it's just from my experience of like how it would make me and how I like would see. Some people just doesn't get along with. I like the ways in which that other people don't like where I have a working problem.

Starting point is 01:11:20 Like I will work through the entire night. Like my brain kicks on when I through the entire night, like my brain kicks on when I'm like, I shouldn't. Yeah, I'm I mean, your head hits the pillow. And that's when we'd. What I have is I'm scared of what I have to of what my day to day life is. So I'm so scared that I can't look at my phone.

Starting point is 01:11:41 Yeah, you know, and I'm like, oh, there's someone wants something from me or there's going to be an email there. So I'm like, oh, so one time I could put my phone down is when I'm high and be like, I feel that way. Like if I if I'm too high or if I'm high looking at the phone, I'm like, I feel this energy of I can't I don't want to look at that. I had to be on TikTok. That's like where I was scrolling. And then I got really into like meat cooking videos. Oh, I love that.

Starting point is 01:12:09 You know, you find really neat and people living in their cars. Yeah, that's my niche. They cook a slab of meat on like a stump. And then it'd be like a KC Rocket clip in the middle. KC Rocket is so fucking funny. Oh, yeah. The first time I saw KC Rocket, I was like, this is the stupidest thing I've ever seen.

Starting point is 01:12:23 And then as it was going on, I was like, no way the stupidest thing I've ever seen and then as it was going I was like no wait, it's genius About the podcast Fuck you Also, I do think Casey rocket is funny, but I thought you meant Casey fray, you know that guy. Oh, I love Casey He's really funny. Casey Rock is very funny. But I was thinking about Casey Frey. I'll rewatch those. He put up something recently where he's like, he did the Jamaican accent or something.

Starting point is 01:12:52 He's like, we're going to talk about a lot of stuff in the world. And then he just did this reggaeton thing. It was so funny, man. I watched it so many times. I've been in a rabbit hole with this guy, Joey Bro. I don't know. B-R-E-A-U-X. He's a truck driver from like Tennessee who sings karaoke in his living room

Starting point is 01:13:13 and he's always off beat and he has a terrible voice but every time someone calls him out on him he's like, you're just jealous. And so it's, dude he has like perfectly coiffed hair and it's just and then he makes these like hater response videos of him like eating hard boiled eggs and like flexing. And it's so bad. And dude, he like covered ZZ Top and it's like the worst thing I've ever seen. But I can't stop watching him think he's great.

Starting point is 01:13:42 And it's I I'm like obsessed with him. He's like. That's what's fun about the internet right now. We're critiqued it. The fun thing is all these things that have found audiences that make no sense. Like there is a subculture of people showing off the interior of their trucks as truck drivers.

Starting point is 01:14:01 Yeah, which is awesome. And it's a huge, it's a culture, you know, like, yeah, I never even knew that about truck drivers that like, I thought they were just in truck. I got my, I got my PS5 and yeah, they got my TV hanging up. Yeah. Yeah. The greatest truck driver video I ever saw. And then we'll wrap up is a truck driver filming himself going, I don't know how he got in here, but he a guy to get out and it was a turkey and he goes go get it and he throws it out and then the next cut is someone's dashcam of a turkey flying through their windshield and then the next cut is a guy covered in blood in turkey feathers and he goes well that just happened that is awesome dude i i was a truck

Starting point is 01:14:46 driver for two years shut up and i that's great uh i worked for my friend's dad's company it was the most illegitimate thing like we would have to do our version of a long haul was like close to a 24 hour a day it would just be like going to oregon or or idaho or eastern washington we had to go in the middle of the night so that the scales would be closed because we'd always be overweight. Right. I was driving air brakes, which was illegal as I was 18 years old, not even eligible to get a CDL. What you need to drive that. And one time I got in an accident and I was driving in Seattle and I really needed to pee. I was like really distracted and I just learned stick shift. I was taught stick shift for 30 minutes and then told like,

Starting point is 01:15:33 Good luck. Yeah, dude. And so I was like crying at intersections like stalling it out like so so scared all the time. Yeah like so so scared all the time. Yeah. So I go and I forget about clearances, but I need to pee really bad. So I'm really distracted. I have my pants undone to like, yeah, alleviate the pressure on my bladder. And I go to cut through an Arco parking lot. And I hit the overhang.

Starting point is 01:16:03 Oh, dude. And I get stuck. I get wedged under the awning. And I thought I stalled it. I was so confused. Oh, so you keep... So I was like, what the fuck? And then there's a dude outside of the truck just screaming at me. Oh, the owner of the gas station. He was so scary.

Starting point is 01:16:20 And and I'm like, just so confused because I thought I stalled it. But I'm like, wait, the truck's running stalled it but I'm like wait the trucks running There's a guy yelling at me. I can't move the truck. The truck is stuck Yeah, I get out I forget my pants are undone. Oh my god and and so I'm like and I look and there's a like a Barista stand at the corner of the parking lot and there's a girl filming and I was like and I'm just getting screamed at by this dude I had to let the air out of the tires Jesus to get the truck to go lower to back out and then I get out and is and that

Starting point is 01:16:54 You know give the insurance information the owner writes up a whole statement for me he's like I Admit that I fucked up basically. He's like, I'm a dumb little boy. Yeah, yeah. And I was like, I'm not signing that. Yeah, that's crazy.

Starting point is 01:17:13 I come from a family of criminals. I know not to admit anything. And he's like, all right, fine, I'm calling the cops. I was like, all right, cool. And then I'm like buying Starburst and like waiting for the cops to show up and then filling my tires back up in the parking lot like just waiting for the cops cops come and just let me go but it was probably the

Starting point is 01:17:32 Stepping out with undone pants as I'm wedged under an awning Was probably the most humiliating moment. Did you did you have to pee that entire time? Yeah I did I ended up going into the guy I used the... I was like, can I go to the bathroom? Did you get a hold of the girl? Did you see the footage? No, I wish. I wish I would have asked for it. Wouldn't that be great if that was on Earth? It would be. Like you guys should like NPR's tiny desk for them the next day.

Starting point is 01:17:58 Well, that's the type of shit like if ever we can do Nardwar, he'll be like, so I have this video. Oh, dude. Nardwar will he'll be like so I have this video Nardwar will find the girl that worked in you doing Nardwar and him showing you the clip of you like It would be so awesome to unearth that would be well, let's work in I hit a lot of stuff at that job I was I was 18. I should not have been a truck driver. Oh my god Well, let's fucking ended there with a dude dude loot, dude Shout out in our noir. I thank you guys so much for coming on the pod Ian and will this is great

Starting point is 01:18:36 Tell everyone what you want them to get eyes on regional just Center freedom sweet freedom out September 20th and We're on tour with Knocked Loose, The Garden, Drain, and Danny Brown on a few dates next month. Oh, that's awesome. We dropped a song called Thought You Were Waving. Incredible song. Amazing song. That's like my entry point right now to get people into you guys. I send them that. I love that song. And I send them Do It Faster and a couple others.

Starting point is 01:19:08 Just the hits. We don't want them to listen to the rest of the stuff. Well, you know, I mean, let's be honest, you know, what you put out in 2020, we'll kind of hide that, but, you know. That was the pro-Trump material. Yeah, we'll be in your town. Yeah, I love it. And where can they get tickets? Military gun dot com slash tour. Cool. Heck yeah. I got a special out on YouTube right now called thin lips. Please check that out. My own podcast called Sad Daddy to Pod. And I will be in Seattle November 1st and 2nd.

Starting point is 01:19:44 and I will be in Seattle November 1st and 2nd. Hell yeah. I am coming all over, PunchUp.com, PunchUp.live, Ian Fydance. I am- Stole that from Tom Segura? What? Wasn't what his tour was called? It's a website that comedians use.

Starting point is 01:20:01 Yeah, it's like to get all your tour dates, you just sign up for like a mailing list. Come in Everywhere is what it's called? Oh no. Oh, that was just me letting people know. Coming Everywhere dot com. Yeah, it's this weird sexual. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Makes comics do some weird shit.

Starting point is 01:20:16 I'm not on it. I'm not on it. No, no. My tour is jizzing all over. I'll be jizzing in your town. You like jizz? I'm coming to Houston, Texas, Nashville. Oh, fuck. Greenville, South Carolina, Detroit, PunchUp.live slash Ian Fidesz. I got dates all through 2025. Wild, happy and free is a special on the podcast YouTube page, Patreon.com slash B&E and pod. Check Jordan out on the road. Her tickets just went on sale to the Gramercy Theater, Wilbur Theater,

Starting point is 01:20:49 uh, punchup.live slash Jordan Jensen. And, uh, thank you as always for watching. We love you guys. This is great. Thank you so much. Shout out to my friends, Kevin and Miranda, who definitely will be watching this. Yeah. Hey, see you later. Kevin and Miranda. Bye

Bein' Ian With Jordan - Bein' Ian With Jordan Ep114: Big Dawgs W/ Brendan Sagalow and Militarie Gun

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