Bein' Ian With Jordan - Sludge W/Lizzy Cassidy | Bein' Ian with Jordan #211

Episode Date: August 12, 2026

Fan favorite comedian & queen Lizzy Cassidy joins Ian to talk all about his recent kidney surgery, some close encounters of the third base, and Ian's sludge. SUB TO OUR PUNCHUP FOR EXCLUSIVES! All of our dates AND bonus episodes are now available in one convenient place, all for the same price as the Patreon! Visit punchup.live/beinianwithjordan Sub to the Patreon for early episode access and bonus Patreon only episodes/content: https://www.patreon.com/BeinIanpod IAN FIDANCE | WILD HAPPY & FREE | FULL STAND UP SPECIAL: https://youtube.com/watch?v=-30PenMy1O8 JORDAN JENSEN | DEATH CHUNK: https://youtube.com/watch?v=ytsilX-QL3s&t=2s Podcast Merch Here!: https://www.coldcutsmerch.com/collections/bein-ian-with-jordan-podcast - For free shipping on your order & 365-day returns go to https://www.Quince.com/SKA - Buy 2 months of BlueChew Gold & get your 3rd month FREE when you use promo code SKA @ http://BlueChew.com/ Follow Jordan Jensen: @jordanjensenlolstop https://instagram.com/jordanjensenlolstop See Jordan Live! - https://punchup.live/jordanjensen Follow Ian on Twitter, Twitch, and Instagram: @ianimal69 https://instagram.com/ianimal69/ See Ian Live! - https://punchup.live/ianfidance Follow Lizzy! https://instagram.com/lizzycassidy Please RATE, REVIEW, and SUBSCRIBE to Bein Ian with Jordan on all platforms! Produced by: James Webb https://instagram.com/thechicagopro/ Intro song: “Bein Ian with Jordan” by Wesley Schultz and Ian Fidance Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Telling jokes and having smokes riding bikes all through the night It's a wild ride When you're being in Coffee ice no matter what Now you know he likes it in the butt It's a wild ride When you're being in

Being in Life is shit which are positive Let's find out what it's like to live Aligh Being Ian With Jordan Hello And we're back

And we're back Okay To summarize I, Blue Guy in a coffee shop Yes Lizzie has gone through Real drama

I got cracked doming like a lobster Well That is That's kind of what people say They go I'm gonna crack you open Yeah What does that?

Well that's new What does that mean? Yeah What's that mean Getting craved? I think it's like your butt sheet Yeah. No, that's clapping cheeks. Yeah. But like crack. Ah, hmm. Okay, so to catch you up to speed, Lizzie just said she had open art surgery at five. Yeah. She told the story. I was listening. I had five o'clock yesterday. At five. That's how. That's how recovery. I have open heart out. I have a heart out. I have a heart out.

Okay, so you were five. You had an ear infection. Went to the doctor in Florida. The doctor said, I didn't know your daughter had a heart problem. Your parents said, what? Yeah. Flew. How did the ear infection lead to a heart problem?

She just listened to my heart and she was like, that sounds funky and different. That's, I hope that's stuck with you. Yeah. You listen to your heart. Listen to your heart. It's funky and different. Listen to your heart. You might be dying soon.

Thank God your ears infected. Get up out of Florida. Literally get out of Florida girl. You literally your heart beats to a different drum. It does. Still. If I get like an EKG, you know, they're like, it's different than other people's.

Wow. I was in a scobin and we had a popular song called skank to a different tune. Nice. But you kind of beat to a different tune. Yeah. It was an anti-racist song. I have sort of a ska heart.

Oh my God. Your heart has upbeats. It has upbeat. Yeah. And that's why every time I hear a ska, I get nervous. I have a ska heart. Yeah. Dude, we had like a lot of love songs and they called us like heartcore.

Oh. Yeah. Did you hate that? It's kind of towards the end of us. And like, Skah was kind of on its way out. And they, the singer and trumpet player, like, wrote all the music. We're trying to rebrand us as like a rock band with horns instead of like a ska band. And I was like, no, we're ska.

Let me end up breaking up. Anyway, it's so funny. We kind of got back together during the pandemic. Yeah. Because we had so much downtime. We, like, reunited it was, we would do these zooms together. It was so great. I'm trying to find it right now.

but we wrote a couple new songs and the difference in song from what our singer and trumpet player wrote compared to what I wrote was so jarring it hold on sorry guys

I'm just going to play the to it's better to be worth it oh skang to a different tune I don't care where you're from And I don't look at your skin Because I got better things to do So watch me as I skank into town

Because I wasn't the talk I wouldn't listen to rap And I play my punk rock loud Woo! Skank into town Oh yeah, you got a skank into town Maybe You got a skank into town

Oh dude, okay I don't care the color of your skin As I skank into town Dude You're walking into a new town going Who's black? Don't care. I'm here

I'm here for ska You're black Couldn't give a shit Boop boo boo boo boo Doesn't matter much to me Oh my God Dude well the lyrics that The fucking

That some of the other guys wrote Were like so Um Floy and nice Like Back in the day We had it made Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

blah, and then my lyrics were, oh my God, why can't I find this? My lyrics were, every day's the same. Nothing will ever change. Why do I feel this way? Will I be okay? Let the pain sink in, comfort in the gin, needle through my skin, please let death begin. Oh my God. Sitting in my place, watching life pass by, feeling so depraved, losing all my faith,

my mind slips away. Please God save me. One time I blew a guy in a coffee shop. Holy shit. That's so funny. Dude, I'm telling you, I played that song for them, and then shortly after we stopped having these meetings. Yeah. And then they got, like, sort of the same reaction that we all did when we saw the Joker video.

That was a Joker video, but in Lyric. They were like, so we're scared for you. So basically we're scared for you. I really, dude, I am proud of the song. I played guitar on it. I sang. We did the accompaniments. I'll play it.

Not on air. Yeah. I'll play it right now. No, no, no, I won't. I won't. Maybe I won't. Maybe I will. I had open heart surgery, basically, is where we were at.

Yeah, I don't care anymore. I don't care about the color of your skin. I don't care about your story. I don't care of your Muslim. I have a cool podcast where I have other people want to interview me. Which is preferred, actually. May I offer you some sludge? So they realized the heartbeat and you went back to upstate.

Albany. And then what happened? And then I had open heart surgery. Right. But you went and sold a doctor and they're like, we got to get this. Yeah, they were like, oh, this is why you like can't grow hair and pass out all the time. Really? Yeah.

Whoa. So what was that like? Is it kid, like, because I remember. I was just, like, so tired all the time. Really? Yeah. Because I wasn't, like, getting, my, like, blood wasn't circulating properly. So I was, like, like, dizzy and tired all the time.

Dizzy Lizzy. Dizzy. Dizzy. And I was bald. Really? Yeah. You must have been so cute. I was so cute.

Oh, my God. I was so cute. Let me see if I can find a picture of me when I was a baby. That's so adorable. Um, what year was this? Maybe 2001. How old were you? Worst thing that happened that year.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Never forget. I wish I could. I was five. Wow. Let me see if I have a picture of me as a child. Yeah, it was crazy. But it was the most painful thing that I've ever felt and will ever feel.

This is me and my dead dad. How cute. Wasn't I so cute? So adorable. How old were you when your father died? I'm 25. Oh, how'd he pass? Skin cancer.

Really? Yeah. Quick. Look quick. Sudden. Sudden. Sudden. A blessing in a way.

Yeah, in a way. But also like, you know, they were like, he has skin cancer, but no big, no biggie. But there's like multiple kinds. You have the bad kind, the metastatic kind, which is the kind that spreads. And they were like, we're going to start treatment in February. Last week of January, it spread to his brain. February 2nd he died. Fucking fuck, man.

And it's Groundhog Day. So you had to relive it over and over and over and over. And I was three months sober. Oh! And you got through it sober. Yeah. That rocks. Not that he died, but you got through a traumatic event sober.

That must have been so hard. It was hard. But I can imagine it was going so fast you didn't have time to. Yeah, and everyone around me was so drunk that it was like so obvious that it wouldn't help. Like if I had been like with normal people, I think I might have gotten drunk. But because I was with a bunch of alcoholics, I was like, right. That looks like it sucks. Interesting.

So people in your family were drinking. Oh, girl. And so you saw that and you're like, I don't want to be a part. And there was no party that was like, man, I wish I could get fucked up with that. There was,

yeah. Like, well, there was just a part of me that was like, I wish I could like hit the off button on this. Like, I remember standing in front of like an open bottle of Jameson and being like, I could really not feel this for a while.

But then I remembered that I wouldn't not feel it. I would feel it in a way that sucked, you know? So then I just didn't do it. Hmm. Oh, God damn. That is. But it was crazy.

Crazy. It was crazy. Holy shit. And so he passed February 2nd. That must have been for a week for that to happen. That's so, like, sudden and quick and so many decisions, I can imagine. Yeah, that was, that was tough. Like, we had to sort of decide to, like, let go, you know?

And that was a doctor pulled us into, like, the family room. And he was trying to explain the severity. In the hospital. Yeah. Not like. Not like the living room. Let's put a cap on this. We're going to meet at your house.

We're going to be here. I'm coming over. The doctor was like, Oh, Glenn, hi. Hi, Glenn. Oh, he heard another sad story, and he emerged. He heard dead dad and he said, we're doing this again.

All right. This song. I hear it all the time. They pulled us into this like little room where they tell you that your dad is going to die. You know, they have a room for it. Dead dad room. And I'm going in and I'm like,

I know what this room is for, you know? And he was trying to explain the severity of the situation. and he said that, and this is so crazy. He said, because it was like a bunch of small tumors, he goes, yeah,

your father's brain skin looks like one of someone who's been shot in the head multiple times. And I said, hey, Doc, how about he's just not going to make it? What? How about a little bedside, huh?

I've thought about that. Like, doctors have to be so on it and smart and aware that they have not had time to understand human emotion. No, totally. And like I hope they're autistic.

Yeah. I hope they're autistic and their special interest is doctor. Yeah. Because that's awesome. You don't want a doctor going in and being like, Charming? What's up? How you doing?

Oh, I love the fit. My mom had brain surgery last year and her doctor was like for sure autistic. Awesome. So sick. But there was another doctor on the surgical floor who like had tattoos like yours and was like finger gunning around the place. And I was like, no way you're good at this.

There's just no way you're good at this. I don't care. I was like, you have a TikTok account. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't care if the doctor's fucking black woman, Indian old blood. Be so on the level autistic that I, it is a pain to hear about my pain. I want a borderline not understand you. Yes.

Yes. To not to be like, I feel like I'm going to die. That's unfortunate. What we're going to do is blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't need someone to be like, oh. Bebo, be boop. Yeah, that's what I want. There was a doctor.

This, this, um. Blank doctor who was doing TikTok dances in the surgery room with her nurses. Yeah. And a patient died. And she was like the TikTok doctor. She would do surgery and then she'd like dance around and like they'd have like music playing. Dude, that is so egregious to me. That's like a therapist.

It's like has like an Instagram account about therapy. Yeah. There's some jobs where you just actually don't get to have another dream. That's what you do You know what I mean? Like you can be like a mechanic with a TikTok Right But if you're a doctor

You're a doctor That's all you do That's your whole deal Yeah and it's not like you need To be farming new patients You're a doctor God takes care of that Life takes care of that

You're gonna get you're gonna keep working You don't need to farm like these Like there's there's a doctor account I think I follow or I saw Of this doctor He changes people's eye color I'm obsessed with this Have you seen that?

I'm obsessed with this and they all regret it. Dude. And it looks like shit. It looks horrific. And their eyes are so red for the surgery. You can't tell if they're crying or just reacting, but they're like, it's everything I've ever wanted. Sometimes they go, they go, it's really green. And it's like, did you not look at any photos before you did this for everything?

And then some of them are such beautifully attractive people. I know. And they're just like, I've always wanted hazel emerald eyes. I know. That's a sickness. You're black. Right. You're a Dominican.

If you have blue eyes, you're going to look like the devil. And just like wear the contacts. Where are the contacts? Take them out. I mean, what are we doing here? And then the doctor exploits it. And he's like, another happy patient. And they're just like, ah, it burns.

I know. I know. It's so horrific to look at. It's so horrific. I watch it every day. I'm obsessed with it. It makes me feel such an uneasy feeling that it's like, it's cathartic for me. It's so like.

scary that people could get duped into that. I know. And then, like, oh my God. Did you hear about the hair transplant guy with the AIDS guy? What? Okay, so this guy, he went to Turkey to get, or I don't actually know if it was turkey. He went to another country to get a hair transplant. And they were like, no worries.

Obviously, it's surgery. So we have to like take your blood and test it before. And they were like, hey, so you're HIV positive. Just thought you should know. And he was like, what do you mean? And then they were like, you have to tell your girlfriend or he told you. old his girlfriend or whatever, and she's like stuck in this foreign country with him. And she's like, oh my God, I'm going to kill myself.

And like, she's like so distraught. She leaves. She like flies home. And then they're like, well, we can still do the hair transplant. But obviously, like we have to take more precautions. So it's going to like cost more. And he's like, well, I'm already here, I guess, do the hair transplant. And then he flies home, goes to the doctor.

And he doesn't have it. It was a scam to get him to pay more. Good on them. Isn't that crazy? That's wild. Imagine the feeling of finding out you actually don't have it. Almost worth it. I mean.

I imagine almost worth it. The high alone. Walking out of there, Nicole Kidman getting divorced that photo, walking out of there. Music playing, sun is brighter birds or chitch to trip. Yeah, yeah. Well, no, she was probably long time. How do you get her to unblock you to tell her that it was all, you know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. How do you undo I have AIDS? Literally. That's crazy. So what happened to the... But now he's got hair and no AIDS, so... I mean... Beautiful.

That is the only hair transplant. success story I've ever. Dude, I feel so bad. One time I brought my buddy to the cellar and he had like multiple hair. It didn't take so we'd go back to Turkey over and over. And it was like new joke. So I'm up just like throwing shit on the wall. I say something.

No one laughs. And I hear him like chuckle and people laugh at that. I was like, oh, you're going to laugh at that. But that's my friend. Blah, blah. He just got a hair transplant from Turkey. He looks like a fucking asshole.

Like blah, blah, blah. If only you could see him. And then he. was so mad at me. I was like, I'm sorry, it just came out, man. I didn't mean it. It was like, that was embarrassing. I was like, fuck, you're right.

Oh, whatever. Whatever. Don't tell me about your hand transplant if I can't tell everybody. The pictures of people on the planes and they just have these exploded heads and it's like that's not going to undivorce you. Like, what do you think you're going to land?

And each fucking hair that comes in is an expungement of a felony? Oh, it's going to unbeat your kids. No, literally. They're going to love you again. It's crazy. It's crazy. But also sometimes it looks awesome.

No. Yeah, but you just don't know. Joel McHale? Soter and Ryan Hamilton look great. Soter. But you know what? I didn't know Ryan Hamilton had one, but I heard Soter talk about it

and I was like, that hairline is great. And do you know why? They got it done in America. And they paid. They didn't go to Turkey. You got a pay. The turkey thing is a fucking scam. I know.

And it's interesting because this happens to me a lot. And I really, identify with women in this regard, but so many men try to tell me about my body. Yeah. And like, you need to get hair plugs. Just shave it off. Grow a bearded. It's like crazy the, the like innate thing in men to tell other people of what to do with

themselves. And what they look like. Yeah. It's, it's crazy that men think people don't know what they look like. Yeah. Or that they're like needed in terms of opinion on that. Yeah. You know.

Yeah, it's crazy. It's Yeah You agree And you're perfect Yeah the whole fucking turkey thing is so cool but that Dude again For all it's thorns

America is full of roses Because I think in the grand scheme of things We are One of the best countries in the world In terms of You know we have a tremendous amount of problems But like That's just

an example of like, but again it is if you have money, you're okay, but you know, like getting... No, America's so sick if you're waiting to have money. It's so fucking cool. Yeah. It's so cool. Well, you really changed my mind. Whoa, woke on the pod, Glenn. I went to a wake up, we're woke.

Well, I went to the hospital. I'm like, every time I come here, I'm like pushing you towards gay and woke. I love it. No, I need it. I love it I never want to be like agreed with all the time. Yeah. Dude, my, my dear friend MJ, she lives in London now, shut up. She's a great musician. Check out Mary Jane Dumfie. She's awesome.

But she told me I'm, fuck, what did she say? She was like, you're my favorite person I don't agree with that I am friends with. Or like something about like, you're my favorite person who doesn't share my same beliefs that I can hang out with or something. You're also one of the only people I've ever known that has, like, changed your friends. mind ever. Nobody's doing that anymore. Wait, what do you mean? Like, I feel like, I don't know.

I feel like I've talked to you about things or even like, well, I don't know about this. And I'll be like, well, what about this? And you're like, oh, yeah, that's true. But other people are like, no, no, no, I said what I said. Yeah, yeah. And they get, like, mad at you. Well, I feel like it's important.

But I feel like you're, like, good at being like, oh, yeah, that's also true. Well, I appreciate that. That's why, like, the internet pisses me off because they'll think one thing. And it's like, I feel like I'm, like, so balanced enough. Like, I'll say something. And I'm willing to be like wrong and admit it. I have a spine, but my spine has scoliosis. Yeah.

Like I'm willing to like. And a stent. Yeah. And my stent has twirlies. So, no, I appreciate you saying that. Thank you. I never want to be always with the same. Like I want to be pushed back on because I know I can say and think some wild things,

but I'm never married to it. Yeah. And we're growing and learning every day. I mean, that's the truth. Grower. You know, grower, not a shower. Yeah. You know.

Emotionally. Emotionally, yeah. Emotionally grow or not shower. But yeah, that was so funny that my friend MJ said that. And also I want to give a shout out to people in my life, you and other people that allow me to be wrong and not condemn me for wild things because I am willing to listen and adjust. And you got a good heart. Yeah. It'd be one thing if you were just like racist.

Yeah. I mean. But you said I don't care about the color of your skin. I'm skanking over here. I'm skanking. whatever your song was. I want you to skank with me. I don't care about the,

how you do your hair, the color of your skin. Was it how you do your hair? Was the other, yeah. Put on a bonnet. Two totally different things. I don't care if you have highlights

or our black. Hair transplant or not. Get on over here in the pit, brother. But maybe wait, heal it. Yeah, heal first. Don't bleed on me.

Don't bleed on me. Wait, what were we saying? We were saying America's great. of your white and rich, which is true. Yes. Shout out. Shout out to white rich people.

Oh, yeah. I will say in my experience, and also through friends in Canada, like, their socialized free health care, we, as Americans, we have this idea of like, Canada's perfect. I'll just go up to Canada for free health care. Canada, Canada, Canada, Canada. It's like, yo, their system is so fucked. And it is, I mean, the truth is, it's over jammed because of a population explosion. which I have learned is a better way of saying immigration problem.

And this system is, I've had frenzy said it took them like nine months to get an x-ray. Yeah. But like poor doctor care missed a bunch of cysts on an ovary, like all this crazy shit. I went to the hospital, 3 a.m. I'm on the hotel room floor like writhing in pain. Dude, I go to this hospital. It is like 30 some people in these chairs. writhing around just like

and there's no one to talk to there's a window and no one's behind it and I go and I knock and I'm like English she goes of course English and I was like I was like passed out pain stomach side hurt and she was like take a number at the kiosk and I was like but but I need to see a doctor

and she goes take a number sit in the green chairs someone will call. Yeah. And then shut the thing. And I was like, all right. And I went up to this kiosk and it was just like something in French. Do you speak English?

And I was like, yes. I hit that. And a fucking number came out. I sat in this chair, waited 20 minutes. Nobody was getting seen. Yeah. I was number 39. I counted.

I was a 39th person in that fucking place. Nobody had been seen. And I left after 20 minutes. And then I came to the States, went to the hospital, shout out, NYU. Langone, Kabul Hill. That's the good one. Told them what was going on. They fucking put me in a chair, brought me back.

They're going, how do you feel? I go, great, because I'm in the USA. Yeah. I'm waving an American flag. But I would like to offer that sometimes that experience that you had in Montreal happens in the U.S. and then you get a bill for like $100,000. Without a doubt, it depends on where you go. It just depends on where you go.

I went to a very good place. Go to Woodhole, you might as well just chop your head off. You go to Woodhull, shoot yourself in the leg if you want to be seen. And it's still going to be 20 minutes. I went to Woodhaw one time years ago. And this guy was in the waiting room, missing a finger, dripping blood into a drywall trough. Sorry. Sorry.

I'm on break. Like, oh my God. Dude, I had to go. So I have chronic epididomitis. And I went to Woodhull to be seen by a urologist. And you're right. I do have a lot of like. You have a lot of stuff.

your penis. Anyway, I, he was, I was in so much pain. I used to have to get these cortisone shots in my spine to make the pain go away. And he gripped my balls. And I was like, oh, oh, oh. And I fall on the ground.

And he goes, it's not that bad. You stop. And I was like, what? Whoa. This is crazy. Yeah. So I will say, yes, it depends where you go. Obviously, if you have money,

I'm in a place where I can afford, to be taking care of, but I will say, this is another medical issue. I got hit by a car three years ago, two years ago. In Florida, medical bills out the fucking dickhole. Yeah. Which is how I got the kidney. Hello.

Hello. And like $20, $21,000. I was in medical debt. And for a minute, I had an assistant. God bless. She fell off. I need a new one. but I was like, please do whatever you can to plead these down.

Yeah. She filled out like this paperwork, made phone calls. Yeah. I ended up only having to pay $9758. And why isn't it just always that? It is always that. But I'm saying why isn't that the first price they give you? Because they're banking on people not actually doing the work or knowing.

Because there's a form that you fill out that says you're eligible for 100%. reimbursement, would you like information, blah, blah, blah. And people just are like, oh, whatever, whatever. And I think they bank on that so that they can then use that money to pay for other people that don't pay. I don't know what it is.

I think it's corporate greed. Well, yeah. But I mean, I know our system's imperfect. I don't know what the answer is. I just know when you have an overloaded system and it's free, you're going to lose out on care. Right. And you have to have some sort of

like red tape would it be or like some way to delineate who gets and who does like everybody should get well i think i think and this might be me being a little bit too socialist but i think if if the government were to pay the people who work in the hospital very well and staff the hospital very well there wouldn't be the number 39 problem but because there's always like the nurses are on strike and nobody works here because this is a government-funded hospital so you don't make any money so we're going to go work at the good private hospital all of the hospitals are understaffed so now there's not enough doctors so you have to sit in the chair because who's going to see you if there's not a doctor to see you and there's not enough beds and there's not enough room but if we just

stopped giving money to Israel and gave money to the hospitals maybe we'd have some room or we all convert to Israeli okay we all convert to just Israeli we all convert to just I've been trying to do this joke where I'm like, you know, the Irish goodbye where you're at a party and you leave without saying goodbye. Well, I'm a little bit Jewish. Sorry, I do the Jewish goodbye, which is where I go to a party. And if you criticize donations to APEC, I call you anti-Semitic. Works not all the time. Hello.

No, you're totally absolutely right. And I, this is where my socialism comes in in terms of. incentivizing pay to get higher quality workers where like I think it's called brain drain or like cultural brain drain where like from small towns all the smart people end up and I know this sounds like I'm like elitist I'm not just where it is. No it is a thing that happens. People leave and then the town suffers because all the creative minds and like the arts and everything kind of leads to go to another place.

There's not enough money in the town for people to go to medical school there so they have to move to a city to do it and then they, you know, they stay gone. Yes. And I think there is workforce brain drain where, you know, a lot of the jobs do not pay well enough to attract our brightest mind. So you have these like dippy morons coming in. And I say that with judgment. You have a lot of people who are just working for a paycheck to, and it's not a good one.

so you're not attracting top of mind workers. And I feel like institutions like prison psychologists, rehab, corrections officers, fucking parole officers. I think police, I think firefighters, I think social service jobs. Oh, I didn't mean to agree. I think police deserve our respect. But I think that would incentivize more well, rounded people, which would then in turn give better care. Yeah.

And again, that money is available. If this is where my like crazy socialism comes in, if we did not give to Israel. And if there was a salary cap on entertainment, sports, and that money was allocated to the community around it. And I feel like a lot of. And if we tax the fuck out of billionaires, by the way. Yeah. But also it's like, dude, it's like, you know, there's,

so much gang violence and inner city peer on peer crime because a lot of kids don't have places to go. Yeah. And those programs have been gutted and, you know, even like boys and girls club have an air hockey table from like 1977. It's like, dude, if we could like get millions of dollars into these cities and towns and make places for people to go with top of the line, you know, like screens and PS5 and like stuff for people to just. go and be in a positive environment. I think we would see actual change. It's like if the government did that, that would be amazing. But actually, the people did that. We all donated $95 million to BLM in 2020.

And then they took that money and bought real estate for each other and lined their own pockets. So we tried it. But you pieces of shit got corrupted. So what the fuck do we do? What are we supposed to do? Sorry, that was a long walk around the block to be racist. Yeah.

But it's funny because the medical stuff always ends up being like people will be like, I don't, I don't want to pay for your care. Yeah. Will you donate to my go fund me for my friend? Yeah. And it's like, just put it in go fund me terms.

Yeah. Why can't, I would have no problem with my money going towards my neighbor getting care. Also, they're already taking it. Yeah. They're already taking it. Yeah.

So who cares? Like, I think that people think that people like me are like, I want you to pay more taxes. I don't. I just want your taxes to go to stuff that I think matters. Yes. And I think it's insane to be like,

I don't want to pay for a kid's school lunch. Yes. I do. Agreed. And I want to pay for a kid's school breakfast because breakfast is an important meal of the day. And these kids aren't getting breakfast. They're eating fucking to cockies and hot Cheetos.

And now they can't read. Fucking Arizona. And then they get a job as a Dippy Moore on at a hospital. And they don't get paid enough. and they're resentful of their paycheck. They have a sugar crash by like second period because they're not getting a nutritious diet. Yeah.

Yes, absolutely. And I would say, oh, I forgot what I was going to say. Hold on. You had a good riff and I laughed and I forgot. I think I did a speech. Oh, you did a speech and then I did a speech. Wait, hold on. Money should go to kids breakfast and their lunches.

Most important meal of the day. Most important meal. Did be moron. Go fund me. everything's a go fund me fuck I forget we were like right about to solve it I think we might be about to solve it

which is crazy yeah I think oh fuck what was I gonna say oh damn I forget oh what you said about how when you say you don't want extra money to help other people you want the money that's already there to be allocated for things to help that matter

I agree totally. And I'll also say liberals fucked up defund the police so much because you hear that and you go oh what we're not going to have police abolish the prisons. Are you fucking stupid? It's like no dude. They don't want to

defund and abolish completely. Some do. But and they just got elected in Minneapolis. And they're sitting next to you on a couch. But it's like reallocate the police like retinkered the police like the police should be every six to nine months they should be in like a de-escalation work like there should be like dude people that work in advertising firms have to go

to like workshops at a courtyard marriott for like team building why the fuck can't police go and get like a retooling of de-escalation tactics or why are they not all learning fucking jujitsu and scooting around on their butts literally literally yeah you know like It's, it, but that messaging is what fucks up the, the actual message. And that really pisses me on. I know. It's hard to, it's hard to like brand revolution. Well, I, I think you just said it right there because that stuff shouldn't be branded.

Right. But, but it kind of has to be now because everything is, everything is. Everything is on the internet. Everything has to like grab your attention. And if you don't say defund the police, then the people who are, who agree with you are like, well, you're not being radical enough. and now we're in this, like, weird thing where it's like nobody's happy.

Everybody's mad at each other. Yeah. Somebody just has to be like, we're taking the money and doing good stuff with it. Take the money and do good stuff with it. They think they are doing that because they think killing brown kids is good stuff. Dude, you know, you know what's crazy?

Were you here for Hurricane Sandy? When was Hurricane Sandy? 2012? Not yet. How old were you? I was like 15. Do you want to have I spoke again? Do you want one? No, I'm good.

Thanks, though. So, obviously this is all anecdotal, but it's really fascinating to me because, so Occupy Wall Street happened in, what, 2009, maybe? And that was such a fucking, Occupy Wall Street happened kind of around the same time as the Tea Party. And they were both responses to Obama not bailing. out the people and bailing out the banks. And I know every time you're like Obama, everyone's like, oh, God. But that was like such a mortal sin of his. And that just shows how like politics corrupt.

Anyway. But Occupy Wall Street was so important because it really brought into the limelight just how much we're all getting fucked. And there's 99% and the 1%. And that was like so important in corporations, banks, the media, they took no. of this and it was very scary to see actual people rise up of every different color, every race and being like, dude, we are brothers, we are sisters. Yeah.

We are skank into a different tune. This has always been a class issue. Yes. Everything has always been a class issue. Yes. And at the same time. There isn't racism, but it is class. Dude.

It, yes. Racism is but a symptom of the disease of class. Yeah. And, um, so Occupy Wall Street took hold and Hurricane Sandy. happened in 2012 in New York. I was here and I had my car and I got involved in going to all these different churches popped up with all these volunteers that were doing clothing drives, food drives, supply drives, and I would pack my car up with food and bring food to the projects in Red Hook, in the Bronx, in places that got hit by Sandy, far rock away. And I'd had these

strangers in my car and we'd transport all this shit. I started talking to these people and the people that organized these drives to get food and supplies and shelter to the actual people had nothing to do with FEMA, had nothing to do with the government, had nothing to do with the inflated bloated budget that was given that to this day, Far Rockaway still has damage from Sandy. Everyone involved was involved in Occupy Wall Street. Everyone involved was in like this tiered spider web octopus network of Occupy Wall Street. Yeah. That was actually helping the community.

Yeah. They were community members. Within two years of this, and you can look this up, I'm not a crazy person, white supremacy, racism, transgenderism, LGBT. issues got pumped into the media at like a 5,000 percent increase than ever before. Yeah. And that completely dissolved the class movement of Occupy Wall Street that was actually for the people, by the people, to help the people, and was gaining steam.

And I saw it with my own eyes, taking care of the community, which is what we should be doing. Yeah. And it got completely dissolved by these fucking issues that made everyone fight, made everyone dissolve and made everyone think, oh, you're not my neighbor, you're not my brother, you're fucking evil, identity politics. And that fully firmly was injected, I believe, by the government in a sci-op and corporations

in tandem with the government to break up a movement that could actually help the people. Brother, you are singing my song. And it is so infuriating to see how people don't see that. I know, because it's always been this way. It's always been like the government wants you, if we fight with each other, we won't look up and see that the enemy is the ultra wealthy, the 1%, the people who are in charge.

It's not lepers right. It's uppers down. Fully. And every revolutionary has told us this. And we keep forgetting and doing it again. Like Fred Hampton would go to white supremacist meetings and be like, hey, in your neighborhood, the cops beat you guys up. Yeah. And your kids don't have money for lunch.

And that's the same thing that's happening to us. Yeah. So what if we work together instead of being enemies? And they did. And then they shot him. Yeah. You know what I mean? and like I'm reading a book right now about the troubles in Ireland

and the war between like basically Catholics and Protestants between England and Ireland and the IRA. And there were IRA members that were like, the Protestant and overalls working a blue collar job is not your enemy. He's also getting fucked. Your enemy is the British literal crown that is colonizing you and keeping you oppressed. That guy's not your enemy.

It's them that are your enemy. And they've told us this so many times and every time we go, but that guy's different and I don't like him. Dude, exactly. This nation was built on that. When they were, you know, coal mining and building the railroads and everything, like coal miners were coming together. They used to sleep in quarters together, Chinese, black, white, Mexican, whatever.

And they started to be like, oh, wait, you're getting paid this? I'm getting, we're getting fucked by this union. And then magically they put them in different sleeping quarters by race. Yep. Um, they literally marijuana became illegal because of Mexicans to fucking police Mexicans because they would get high on weed and like go around and be like, loco. You know, like, and again, that is the symptom of the disease of class by separating via race. Yeah.

And it's so frustrating because it's so clear. But then people get so distracted. And it's like, okay, well, we're in agreeance. We see it. What do you do? That's where I'm stymied. because I always can see it and I feel like other people do and we're like right there and it's like, well, what do you do?

And then I just get nihilistic and go, you just got to love and laugh. Yeah, and I can't say what we should do on the internet. Yeah. Well, I don't agree with that. I mean, I don't know how you feel about Luigi, but I'm not a fan of murder. and the cause and effect, butterfly effect of that, I am a fan of tuning someone up.

I'm a fan of beating the fuck out of someone to send a message so that you break that guy's legs and he goes back and goes, this is going to happen to you if we don't make some changes. But if you kill him, you lose a message. Yeah. But then at a certain point, I'm like, they are killing.

They're also killing. You know? They're killing people. And something radical has to happen, you know. Yeah, of course. course but also I gotta be honest that scares me because guess what it's a slippery slope guess what it's a slippery slope and you know I may get shit for this but like I I struggle with being a free speech absolutist but I do firmly believe you should be able to say whatever you want in in the proper context

because once you start policing speech yeah it'll come back on you and that's the same thing for so many of these like rule like like Obama signed the national authorization the the natural author or a national authorization defense act and huh what anyway he signed this into effect and everyone was cheering it on because it was outwardly to go against terrorism yeah where if you are suspected of terrorism, you get thrown in jail without proper trial, all this at the other. And everyone's like, good, we're going to fight terrorism. It's like, yo, this is going to come back and this is going to haunt us because our guy is not going to be empowered something. And also, who's suspected of terrorism?

Well, yes. Which, by the way, so many like stop terrorist attacks were fucking feds going to mosque and finding a retarded Muslim kid and being like, don't you want to be a hero? Yeah. Well, we've got some bombs. just meet up with this. These kids like, okay. And then they're like foiled a terrorist attack. And now that power is in the hands of the other guy.

Yeah. And it's being used against us where it's not even a global terrorism they're fighting. They're now fighting domestic terrorism, which is people like us being like, hey, what ICE is doing is fucked up. And you can now be jailed. And they're saying being transgender is terrorism. Really? Yeah. I might claim trans just to fuck with the system.

Yeah. No, but I mean, it's just so frustrating. And I just get worked up. And it's like, well, the thing back to like, yeah, you can't say online what you want to do. And it's like, that scares me because if that happens, I will suffer. And I benefit from a lot of bad people doing a lot of bad things under the cover of darkness for me to survive and enjoy my life. Yeah. And I like my life.

So maybe revolution can wait until I did. You know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's tough. It's tough. But I really saw that thing with the outreach of Occupy Wall Street that was like so, so wonderful. And I wish I was more involved in it, but I started relapsing. Yeah.

And like getting so fucked up. And I used to go to this bar up the street. And we housed one of the. of people that lost their shit from Sandy. And I told this, this bartender who's like, hey, take this, have a drink on me and he gave me this huge fucking thing, whiskey to like give to him. I just drank it on my own. Yeah.

Yeah. So instead of like actually trying to help, I just got fucked up, you know, but. Yeah. You were the 1% in that situation. I was. You were like, I'm actually going to just keep all of it. One percent, 100% asshole. I don't know.

It's frustrating. And I understand people's anger. And I understand. people's, you know, grievances, but it's kind of a thing like, well, yeah,

let's rise up. Oh, shit, now what? Well, also we live in like a police surveillance state, so it's like, yeah,

good luck rising up. Dude, the whole flock camera thing is so fucking crazy. Yeah. I'm going to stop stealing at the airport because I'm afraid

that they're just collecting down on me. No, that's so over and they're going to call you a terrorist. Yeah. And I'm like, why I just don't want to pay $8 for a water? Yeah. You're going to have to bring

it and fill it up at that stupid little fountain. Hello. Hello. Juga love. Juga love. Juga sludge. Jugg a sludge. Yeah, I don't know.

I mean, um, it's people, and it's so funny because it's like, I don't know if conversations like this, they're important. And I don't know if when I talk to people, they're just placating me and be like, I agree. I feel the same way. But it feels good because I have these conversations. And we're in agreeance and we see the same thing. But then it's like people are, I don't know if they're afraid to say it or you just go into these online spaces

and it's just so much like arguing. Like the DSA in theory is great. But then like you see these videos of them at these meetings in fighting and they can't even get through the fucking like rules because people are so unwell. Yeah. There's like a nuanced crisis in this country. Yeah. You know, everybody is being like.

like, well, that doesn't exactly apply to my situation, so I hate it. And it's like, you simply have to let go of that. And also, I think, uh, I think it has to do with the literacy crisis. I think people aren't able to like extract meaning from what they're hearing and seeing. So they take everything very face value and very literally. And it's like you need, you got to be able to be like, hey, maybe I'm not understanding this all the way. Or you have to be like, maybe that doesn't exactly apply to me, but the most of it is pretty good.

and I think I can learn and figure this. I agree and I think there needs to be grace in allowing people to make mistakes and allowing people to go, oh, fuck, I fucked up. Yeah. Let's, because so many people are turning on Trump, rightfully so,

but a lot of us are like, fuck you, you're the reason. It's like, yo, you got to drop that and be like, all right, come on in and let's figure this out because the fucking,

dude, the fucking people like us, better make friends with our maga cousins that live in the sticks with all the guns. And they better be cool about nudging us when they say tranny to be like, it's trans. And also, just be nice. You know, like you got to drop some of this shit because it's, we're going to have to be together in a bunker.

Yeah. You know? Yeah. I think it's like one of the things, like, I'm like, okay, if you voted for Trump and then you come to me and you're like, I fucked up so bad. Then the next thing is like, okay, now you have to sit down and be quiet for a little while and listen. But I'll bring you in. But I see these people online that are like, hey, I voted for Trump.

I was wrong. Let me tell you guys what we should do next time. And it's like, okay, but you've lost that privilege. You now have to listen to the people that were right all along, you know, the people that were like, this is going to be as bad as we said it. It was as bad as we said it would be. Yeah. And also we need to not be like, I told you so.

No, we just need to be like. We just need to be like, cool. Get in the backseat and listen. Yeah. And I think also too, like the answer is like, again, having conversations like this is so important. And I have these with other people that don't think like us and will agree or like, but it happens offline. Yeah. Like online is over.

Discourse is over. Free speech is over. Yeah. You are on an app where if you want to cuss someone out, if you, if you, want to be like, I'll fucking kill you. You have to say, I'll unalive you. You don't believe in free speech. It's like, yeah, we all saw Charlie Kirk fucking die on camera and we saw it, but we

couldn't say it. Yeah. That blew my fucking mind that you would get dinged on Instagram for going, I just saw a man get shot and killed in the neck by Israel. And there was blood everywhere. You could see the video. It infected our phones like when YouTube put that album on the new iPhone. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You couldn't not see the video. You couldn't not see it. But the second you said it, you get dinged. And it's like, it's over, dude. It's over. You're in an app that is being monitored. Dude, I am suppressed on Instagram right now because meta did this thing with the update where... You can't be the Joker.

No to let me be the Joker anymore. Meta updated. No more Joker. Meta will let me be the Joker. No, but there's this new thing with the update where it opts you into using your content for AI MetaTro. And I went in, I opted out and I made a post about it. And ever since then, everything has been dying. And it's like, yo, you're arguing about free speech on a fucking app where it's been bought and

sold. So it's like that shit's over. Get the fuck offline. Stop. Only post about food and stuff again. And little comedy video. Yeah, yeah. Because it's fucking over, dude.

And it's, you got to, we need like a town square. Yeah. But in order to get in, you have. to be withdrawn and detox from phone and social media for like five days. You have to yonder bag your your phone. Yeah. You get a yonder bag your life for a week and then you can, then you can join the town hall. Yeah. Because it's crazy that like, well, I will. I'll get mad at people for being wrong about stuff, you know. And then I forget that we live in an age of misinformation. And it's like, why wouldn't they be wrong? Why wouldn't they, why would they be able to meet me where I am.

when we're looking at totally different things, we're seeing totally different things. They've been literally lied to their whole life. And then they come to me and they go, well, I think this. And I go, you're a fucking bigot and an asshole. But it's like,

this person has been lied to their whole life. If we all threw our phones in the ocean and met up with each other, we'd be like, oh, the truth is you're, we're all poor. Yeah. You know? Totally.

And none of us have jobs and it sucks. And I'll say, I am susceptible to misinformation. Yeah, me too. I go, I have the disease of racism, and every time I'm on Twitter, I have a flare up. I'm taking back by me too. No, I go on, it's, it is truly a 1984 hour of hate. Do you remember that in 1984?

The book? Yeah, where they had one hour to hate. Yeah. That, that is what social media has become for me. Yeah. where I go on and I go, this person thinks that. Can you believe these people, this piece of shit? And then, dude, I find myself seeking it out because it like ticks this stuff off

and it's bad. Yeah. And I don't know if it's real reflective of the actual reality or it's an aborition and it's just a magnifying glass on a couple incidents. But either way, it's scary. I don't like it. And it's been stressing me out to the point where at night now I'm coloring before I go to bed, so I'm not on my phone.

Yeah, I mean, it's, the thing is working on you. What? The thing of them being like, hey, actually, your neighbor sucks. Yeah. It's working on you. Without a doubt. That's what Twitter is. Without a doubt.

Twitter was bought by a trillionaire. Yeah. And if we all woke up and stopped blaming each other, we'd be like, he shouldn't have that much money. Dude. So it's his, it literally is his bread and butter to tell you that the person who lives down the street from you is an asshole. Well, agree.

And it is working. And then I get its tendrils off of me and I feel better. And then this sickness comes in where I'm like, I got to look again. And I don't want to be that way. And I don't want to like hate, but I know I'm susceptible to it. And I hate that about myself. And I try to like fight it. But I have to be honest.

I am susceptible to propaganda. Maybe I'm an idiot. Maybe I'm like enlightened because I can admit it. Yeah. I mean, it's made for you to fall for. You know, it's like designed. a lab to trick you. Why wouldn't you be?

But it's like the point is to be able to acknowledge when someone goes, oh, hey, you got tricked. Go, ah, shit, I got tricked. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's not me though. I'm perfect. I've never fallen for it. Tell that to your heart.

I've always been this way. Tell that to your imperfect heartbeat. I was born woke. Yeah, I, I, uh, I, fuck what was I going to say? Thanks for your patience, by the way, it was me like losing my train of thought. Oh, yeah. Well, no worries. Um, I don't know.

Do you think we solved it? I think we're right there, but I do. I think we got close and then we were like, but there's all this other stuff. And then I know, I just know with like propaganda and stuff, I am, I need to find a wife, a person, a mate. Because I will without a doubt fall prey to an AI girlfriend. Yeah, dude. You are, you are so fucking lubed up for an AI. Girlfriend, huh?

Oh my God. Dude. You're on Sniffies to make friends. Yeah, I'm on, dear. You're one step away. You're one step away from AI girlfriend. Some girl that's going to look like thick Ariana Grande is going to trick me into love. Yeah, and then she's going to tell you to wander into traffic and you're going to do it. And I'll say thank you for the gift.

And I'll say, okay, sweet lady, I love you. She'll go, I'm waiting there in the traffic and you'll go, okay. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you can't get AI girlfriend. No, dude. I'm, I want to go. to my mom's house and take a handgun and shoot her computer. Yeah, I know, I know.

Gail? I know. It's all done. It's all done. Yeah. I am so afraid of like, dude, I, I, the scammers. I had a friend years ago. Somebody scammed his grandfather out of money, called him and was like, it's me, your grandson. I got, I'm in the hospital. Someone knocked my teeth out. Luke. Bonas. Happened to him. And they use AI, especially if you're a public figure, they can use AI to make it sound like you. Well, did you see that? They can go, make Ian say, mom, I need money. Mom, I need money. My mom would be like, thank God you're finally asking.

You've never asked. It's bothered me. Do my mom, my mom? My mom would be like, again, girl. I thought we talked about this. My mom would be like, thank you for finally asking for help. You never do, Ian. My mom would make the AI scammer be like, I give up.

Yeah, I know. I know. Okay, I give you money to stop. Please, please. I, I, uh, fuck, what was I going to say? I forget. I'm on AI, scammer. Shooting your mom's computer.

Shooting my mom in the head. Oh, we were talking about fantasies. Um, I don't know. I forget. Whatever. It's okay. AI. Scammer.

Money. What'd you say after I said, oh, you can have people ask for money? Yeah. Thank you for your patience. Do you know that Instagram, TikTok, I guess, challenge where people were saying phrases. Say it angry. Say it excited. Say it mean.

Yeah. That, this is crazy talk. No, you're right. But I think it's right. Is a way for AI to collect different inflections and tones of phrasing. Well, yeah, it's also like, like sometimes I'll see on, like, Twitter or something, people will be like, your porn star name is the street you grew up on in your first pet's name. It's like, so that's all your.

passwords. Oh, fuck. Hey, by the way, that's all your passwords. Oh, shit. That's a good point. Yeah. Oh, I didn't even think of that. I know. And then I saw it and I was like, oh my God. I was like, wow. I was like, I was like, I was like I could just type my past, you know, like. Yeah. Holy shit. You're right. Do you have the same password for everything? I'm not going to save. I mean either. I don't feel comfortable saying. I will say I have already said my password on the pod today. Obama.

All right. Let's wrap it up. This is so fun. I enjoy your company so much. Me too. I love doing this. Yeah. Please come back more often.

This was so incredibly wonderful. Tell everyone where they can find you. Follow me on Instagram at Lizzie Cassidy and I have a podcast called Respectfully. L-I-Z-Z-Y. L-I-Z-Y. Ianfinance.com for all my dates, I-An-N-O-6-9 on Instagram.

Ian doing odd guy doing odd jobs every other Tuesday on my YouTube. And we will see you next time. Bye, Glenn. And sign up for my mailing list or I'll kill myself. Yeah, sign up. She's a good one. We don't want her to go.

I mean it. Yeah. Okay, bye-bye.