Bellied Up - Dusty Slay Reinvents the Porta-Potty #149

Episode Date: May 1, 2025

In this episode, we're at Acme Seed & Feed in Nashville ,TN, with comedian Dusty Slay. We talk through Dusty’s long list of past jobs—from Office Depot to Papa John’s—and he shares some stories from the road. Our first caller is an engineering student working in the porta-potty business, and we brainstorm ways to improve the porta john experience. Later, we take a call from a gal dealing with two major issues: her unreliable phone service and her difficult sister.Leave us a Voicemail: 218-303-5095

We now have a voicemail line. We know that it can be frustrating to call in and wait for a long time. We hear you that stinks. So by including the voicemail line, it will allow everyone to get a chance to have their topic heard. We'll listen to the voicemails then line up calls with the ones that we love. This means the more interesting your topic and the more energy that you bring increases your chances of being featured on the show So if you want to be on the show call two one eight 303 five zero nine five you can call in 24 seven and again the number is two one eight 303 five zero nine five if you forget the number it's in the description of the podcast. So don't worry

Cheers. Enjoy the episode. Do you research a number, it's in the description of the podcast. So don't worry. Cheers. Enjoy the episode. Do you research a city before you go into it? Sometimes people try to send me stuff. They're like, if you want to make jokes about the city, here's some stuff, but I don't really want to. Yeah. Unless, you know, I see something that's cool and funny, then I'll do it. But got it. I don't know. I just feel like if I'm picking the things that is is somebody's it's like people are probably already doing this. They're probably all riffing on these things. Yeah, they picked it apart pretty good. And the people who go there see comedy shows. They've heard it all. Yeah. And I don't really like to make fun of the city that I'm doing comedy in. Right. You don't want to roast the city. Yeah, I get it. Yeah. Kind of sets the table in a weird way a little bit, especially if you hit on like one of those things that people are actually, you know, soft on, you know, or sensitive to like miles.

If someone were to go to Fargo and what would be the joke that would piss you off? I mean, we get a lot of there's nothing going on here. Like, why do you guys live here? Oh, yeah. Stuff. But I was really pissed me off. That's boring, though, too, because it's like there is stuff going on in Fargo. That's true. I've been there a couple of times.

It's pretty fun. Yeah. We've had some good times there. That's for sure. It's just when you get right outside of Fargo, that's where we get the rap. Charlie, we were driving in the winter outside of Fargo and Charlie looks at me and just says, are we on the moon? Oh, yeah, just flat from Fargo to

Bismarck that's where nothing's going on. There's roadside attraction. Yeah, there's a big Buffalo statue Yeah, you know The only thing going on is just snow drift like I did a Bismarck Fargo run in January, I think, last year or something. And oh, man, you ever do that in winter that you get those snowdrifts? Yeah, I mean, yeah, I actually went to Devil's Lake, North Dakota. OK, I think I had to fly into Bismarck. Would that make sense? Or Grand Forks, maybe? Yeah, one of the, they had,

I feel like they had kind of like a lot of ATVs in the airport on display. I do think that and but and then the whole ride, I mean, it was snow drifts. Yeah. Yeah. Which are gnarly. I mean, you think that that'll be fine. I can go 70 miles over that thing and then you know, you're fish tailing in a, in an SUV. Yeah. The Bismarck airport, they got the ATVs. That's like the, you know, the handicapped carts that people ride. You just have to hop on the back of a four wheeler and go to the airport. Yeah. Before we get too far along, let me introduce you ladies Ladies and gentlemen, we got comedian Dusty Slay here today joining the Bellied Up podcast.

And it's a pleasure to have you here, man. Thanks for having me. And let's let people know right off the top too, you're gonna be for my Milwaukee people. You're coming to town. Yeah, I got some new dates. This, doing today, I don't know when this comes out, but today is the launch of my second half

of the tour, and I'm in Madison, Wisconsin, on August 15th. For some reason on this poster, it says coming soon, but we're doing the announce today. I don't know why it says that. And then August 16th, I'm in Milwaukee. OK. And then just later on, you know, November 21st, I'm in Wausau. And then November 22nd, I'm in Green Bay. That's going to be awesome, man.

That's a good stretch. Those are all great cities. And you pick the nice months to be there. Yeah, yeah. I love Wisconsin. That's great. Yeah, I've been all over. You should have.

I'm not a big fan of Egg Harbor, but everywhere else I like. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wow. What happened in it? Actually, it's it's fine. But then a funny business had a show at Egg Harbor. I don't know if you ever worked with funny business, but, you know, it's just kind of a resort place.

Yeah. Yeah. And the show was not great. I didn't like it. I was on stage. It was too well lit. I could see the whole audience the whole time. And it just my my feature at the time, Aaron Weber, he was on stage. He was doing pretty good. And I thought, all right, well, this is going is gonna be great and then they just did not like me and I Got off stage and the guy who was paying me had my check in his hand and I took the check and I beat

People from the audience out to the car I never have left so fast like I was getting in my car at the same time people in the show was getting in their car. Well, why was it so bad? It's that is kind of like a ritzy, the ritzy is part of Wisconsin you can go to. It's it's Door County miles. So it's right in the thumb there. And yeah, there's some spendy people.

But but to be fair to Wisconsin, a lot of them come from Illinois. Yeah. So, okay. So, yeah. That makes sense. Did you offend Chicago people early on? I don't think so. I don't know what happened, but nothing bad happened,

but it's just kind of one of those where you're like, all right, that joke didn't really work, but I'll get them on the next one. And then after a while, you're like, all right, this is never gonna kick into gear here. And then you're up there for an hour, and then you go, all right, well, see ya. Thanks, sir.

Thanks for coming out, I guess. You beat them out the door and they think you're their Uber. Oh, yeah. I'm ready to go. I've never been out of a venue so fast. And they weren't giving me a hotel there, so I had to drive to get to the hotel. So I was like, let's just get out of here right now.

I don't want to hang around and have someone go, hey, great set. I didn't want to hear it. Yeah. You know, it was kind of like you blow up a public bathroom and you come back to the table and you're like, guys, we got exactly. It's gonna be bad. Well, you just go on out and text your friends. I'm out of I'm in the car. Pay the tab. I'll get you back. So when you like, what's been like your worst bomb as a comedian, if not Egg Harbor? I don't, I wouldn't say that's the worst because that was like, it was a weird one there because it's like, it's going well enough to where you can't like, I don't know, if you're really

bombing you can just break and just go, all right, I don't know, if you're really bombing, you can just break and just go, all right, I'm just going to do new jokes. None of this is working. I'm just going to work on some things. Plan B. But with that Harbor, it was always like, ah, now I'm about to turn a corner here. You know, I don't know. There's been so many bad bombs along the way. I don't bomb anymore, which is nice. I mean, who knows? Maybe tomorrow I do. But I don't bomb anymore, which is nice. But I bomb, I've had some weird corporate events. I did one in Charlotte, North Carolina.

It was like a beer event. Like it was, I forget what company, but Red's Apple Ale was the tent that I was doing. But it was whoever the parent company for Red's Apple Ale is had a big thing and it was in a convention center. So they had all the tents set up for every alcohol that they own. And then they had a different thing going on.

So like next to me was a booth and they had a DJ and then there was my booth. And then the next one was like a dunking booth. And then I was in the middle and I was doing comedy on a high stage behind the bartenders. So there were two girls, servants of Red Zappa L and I was on the behind them on a high stage with a wireless mic. And they wanted me to do three separate 30 minute sets. And I'm just up there. And after you know, five minutes you're like, no one's listening to me. There's no audience. I'm just talking. I'm just trying when people

come up to get a drink, I'm reading their name tag and trying to make jokes. One lady was like, what are you doing up there? So that's probably the worst. It, it's pretty good pay, you know, pretty good pay at the time. But even now, I don't think I would do it for that pay. Yeah, I wouldn't do that gig. Those corporate ones are always very interesting because they're always very well lit, as you said. And then there's a lot of people who are just not comfortable laughing. And so I think one way is you got to find where HR is sitting

and just maybe acknowledge that right off know, right off the bat. That's probably a good idea. Yeah. Yeah. Ask them to leave. Yes. Our leaves to the rest of the company can, you know, let them know. But yeah, I say that. But having done that at several corporate shows, it never really is that big of a hit. You know, it's always show to show. You know, I had one guy, he was the, like, the, the, he hired me, he was the head of the event and he looked like Triple H, the wrestler. And I made a joke about him. I was like, ah, I didn't know Triple H worked here, you know?

They got no laughs. I was like, come on guys, this guy looks just like Triple H. I think they were afraid of him. Yeah. We don't want to make, we don't want to laugh. Yeah. You don't know those intricate, delicate politics. And if you do make fun of the wrong guy, it puts an awkward thing in there. And that was the Oklahoma department of transportation. Oh yeah. You're already. Yeah. Yeah. And they were like they had the list of all their previous guests and it was like they had like George Bush, Peyton Manning. I was like, Oh, it's not going well

this year. No, we just thought we'd try a comedian. Oh, did you? Yeah. No bonuses either. Oh, man, That's good. So you live here in Nashville. Yes. And you, you got like a farm or something, right? Well, I live, you know, I live in a neighborhood, but I do outside of Nashville. I have a little land and I have a little cabin out there and I put planted some, you know, fruit trees and I'm trying to do an orchard but it's an hour and 40 minutes away so I'm never I don't get out there much. Yeah, the trees are on their own. Yeah, right. I get out there

once in a while prune them up, try to make things look nice. But you know, they're on their own. You planted them. So your work's kind of yeah, it's like survival of the fittest out here. You know, if you can make it, you know, then then you're it's like your parents when they leave you at home, they just drop a 20 on the table. Like that's for pizza. Good luck. Yeah. Turnkey trees is what they are. Yeah. Watching a lot of cable.

And then I built I got videos on it on YouTube and I built these like swales for some of them where it's like, you know, the because it's on a hill, the whole thing's an income, but the, you build kind of a, as it comes out, you build a little ditch and then it goes up and then you plant the trees on the ridge. So as the water comes down, it can puddle up in there. So you kind of collect the rain. Yeah. So it soaks in slowly. So that's the plan. And helps with erosion. erosion yes from what I remember

from science class. Yeah and then instead of all your topsoil washing away it washes into the swales and you get this good you know I don't know fertilizer rich soil yeah allegedly I'm impressed I'm very impressed by that do you have like you got a little bobcat that you what kind of toys do you have out there? Well, I just have a four wheeler and a zero turn but I think I would like to you know, I would like to get into a little backhoe stuff like that. Yeah, some kind of thing. I'd like to be able to dig my own holes. You know, like a dabble. Yes. Yeah. I know. Ginger Billy. And he said that's

what he has is something like that. You know, ginger. Yeah, yeah, I do. And he's bought that sort of thing. So he said that's what he does. He just kind of gets to play around and dig holes. Second podcast we've done a row where we've talked about that there's just nothing better than digging a hole. Yeah, it is fun. It's great. Something about moving dirt from point A to point B.

It's just all we need is guys to be happy. I feel like we like if you ever mess with a forklift, the same thing. I'm just moving pallets from one place to another. But it's the best time. It is fun. I used to drive a forklift at Office Depot. It is a good time. Were you a good forklift operator? Were you forklift certified? Now this I was forklift certified but this was you know, this is Office Depot. This is not, you know, a giant warehouse. So it's a battery powered forklift, you know. It's not, you know, it's not a gas powered.

Yeah, you only have a tank in back or anything. But it was still pretty fun. Do you have any forklift accidents? No, and I should have. I mean, I used to, I was high a lot back then, and I would I'd have to go in and I guess I probably knocked over a pallet, but it's you know, it didn't it didn't. It's not like those you see on TV where the guy or on the Internet

where the guy wrecks the whole show. You know, I just tipped one over. But, you know, I would as people would get fired at Office Depot, they would not rehire anybody. So I would just kind of absorb all these positions. So I was the furniture guy and the stocker, but I would sell someone a piece of furniture. I would go in the back.

I would raise the forklift up to where the furniture was at, and then I would climb the shelf, put the furniture on the forklift, climb back down, lower it, put it on a cart and then take them to the register and I would run the register. I could do it all there. That's impressive. Yeah. Did they ever put you on the tax accounts before you getting let go? Oh, I don't know. What do you mean?

Oh, I don't know. Just saying you do every job there. It was my attempt at a joke, but I think the woman has passed No, they never know they never even really acknowledged that I could do all these things. Okay, they were very disrespectful to me It's like the guy in a group project that does all the work you were that guy and then everyone else was just getting an A Yeah, and they would get mad at me about other, I'm like, guys, I'm doing it all here. Don't be harassing me about things. There was a guy named Roger, and Roger was the receiving manager,

and the receiving manager position went away. So Roger got moved to a different position, and I took his old job, which wasn't a management position. So now Roger's out on the floor critiquing things. I'm like, I'm doing your old job and my old job and you're just walking around out here I got in trouble with Roger a lot and I Can sense it? Yeah, I got it

They got they had me in the office one time and they said we could write you up for insubordination and I go I don't even know what that means Is that your favorite job that you've done or was your favorite favorite gig? I don't know that I liked any of them that much. Waiting tables was probably the most fun for me. OK. Yeah, you know, because you're hanging out. It's like I was living in Charleston, South Carolina.

So it's like a college city, beach city. So I didn't go to college, but that's kind of like my college experience. I'm working with college age people and we're drinking and partying and it's a great time. Charleston's a beautiful party city and I had a great time. As a waiter, were you the guy, would you write it down or would you try and remember it to impress the whole table?

I always wrote it down. It's not worth the risk to try to impress the table. They're not impressed enough when you pull it off versus when you mess up. And they're like, you should have wrote it down when you pull it off. They're not like impressed. They're actually relieved. Yeah. He did get it. Yeah. Do you wait for people to take their first bite while asking them how the food was?

Or was it not even a restaurant where you would ask how the food was? Oh, I would ask, but I would come back. Yeah. I'd give them a second, then you'd come back. All right, here's your omelet. How are the first bites tasting? Yeah.

You haven't even. I feel like that's a new thing. How are the first bites taking? When I was in the service industry, I never asked that at all. I think that's just because you weren't very good. I could have been not very good. Yeah, I like to go. How is it? I don't want to get into how many bites you've had. Yeah, I like to just go. How's it going?

It looks like you got about 10 bites down. How's 10 bites? Yeah, you've got 10, but you've only got two. You must, you know, it's like, you don't want to. You don't like it. Yeah. That's that I noticed something working at Auntie Anne's as a pretzel roller. I bring that up because it's you know, it's one of my I like to name drop Annie Anne every now and again.

And I don't know a lot of pretzel rollers. Oh, yeah Well, you know, it's it's shown the moves Here we go Charlie's oh, yeah. Wow. Oh, okay. That's dough. Yeah. Oh, yeah Wow, look at that a Mike Kb pretzel. There you go. Yeah.

Be impressed you guys. But with the dough, it's a little bit more seamless. Be more impressed. I've worked with dough. I used to work at Papa John's. So I messed around with dough a little bit. Did you notice in the Papa John setting that if there was no line, nobody would come.

But as soon as a line started, you would just have a line all day. Well, I was a line started, you would just have a line all day. Well, I was a delivery guy. Okay. I was in and out. I was manager for a day. I got hired. I got promoted and then that went, it didn't go as well as they had hoped. One day? Well, look at someone doing one day to lose the promotion. Well, my manager, he wanted to go to a concert and he was like, do you want to be manager? And I was like, yeah, I'll be the manager. And he gave me go to a concert and he was like, do you want to be manager? And I was like, yeah, I'll be the manager.

And he gave me a real crash course and then took off. The shift went well, but I didn't grasp any of the closing paperwork. Yeah. He wanted me to print off all the it was like a Scantron. You know, remember those are the dot matrix. And I was like, this was, you know, early 2000s. And I was like, this is, I don't know what's going on. He's like, you staple this and this and count this. And I was like, I don't know, man, but you get out of here. I'll hold it.

Have fun at the concert. Yeah. Oh, that's great. What do you think miles? Should we take some callers? Yeah, let's do it. It is. This is miles Charlie and the comedian dusty sleigh is on the line with you. All right, Gabe, we're having a good time. Hey, so Gabe, we hear you clean porta potties. Yep. I do. Let's hear about it. What's going on in the porta potty game these days? And I don't know. I don't know how to start this off. I mean, just got into it and, and I get anyone else would say it's a pretty shitty business. Yeah. Nice. Nice. I see what you did there, Gabe. Now listen, I wanna ask you, what inspired you to get into the Porta Pot biz?

Well, long story short, I'm actually going to school for engineering and they always say, well, if you wanna become an engineer, you know, you have to know what's going on in the job site. So I decided to choose this job. Are you looking to engineer porta potties? Oh, yeah, no.

OK, I'm in the buildings behind the porta potties, but. OK, you got to start somewhere, though. Got to start somewhere. Got to get on the job site. Yeah, it's like they're like, you know, start from the bottom, work your way up. You're like, I don't know if you need to start that far in the bottom. Well, let me when you're cleaning them, it's like they're like, you know, start from the bottom, work your way up. You're like, I don't know if you need to start that far in the bottom. Well, let me when you're cleaning them, are you like once they're back at the, you know, the the lot, are you cleaning them or you go in with like a spray bottle and you're wiping down the seat?

I'm just trying to get a gauge of what's going on. Oh, you know, the boss man, he's pretty hard on me when it comes to cleaning. So you got to get in there you got to yeah completely suck them out and make sure they're all cleaned up for the next day and you know get the new toilet paper in and Well, it's a lot of fun. It's underappreciated. I'm sure you don't get enough Thanks about it, but we appreciate it when we're using them and they've been you know fresh Yes, when I used to work concrete construction it was always the buzz of

the job site whenever we found a clean porta potty around the job site. Oh yeah. It wasn't clean for long I'll tell you that. You wanted to find it first you want to be a first one in there. Yeah I mean I don't I I never done construction but I have worked at Home Depot and I know what they're doing to that bathroom in there and those flush. That's true. What would you do? Would you have to remove all of the like markers and stuff that they would write? You know, call this number for a good time. Would you have to remove that or you guys just say, fuck it, we're just going to let it ride and not clean that off?

Oh, man, as much as I'd love to keep those there, because they are a fun time to read. Fun time to call. They are a fun time to call. I think I found your guys' phone number up on one of those. Did you? I had a feeling. That's why he's calling in right now.

Actually, a good way to mark it way to mark how I met my wife What's what's the weirdest thing that you found in a porta potty when cleaning it out Weirdest thing I found either written on the wall or just left in there some yeah like some trinkets or something I Mean some some of those guys there. They're like some trinkets or something. I mean, some some of those guys, they're they're pretty smart. They put a whole, you know, news articles and and, you know, funny toilet times and all that. What about in the thing, though, do you ever find like an old cell phone or a watch or a ring? Oh, a wig.

Yeah, maybe Superman Oh, in it. A wig. Cocaine. Yeah, maybe Superman's changing in there. Oh, just the usual stuff. You know, soda bottles and those, some of those guys out there, they love drinking their beer while working. So I think I'm on the bed of that. Nothing like chugging a Miller light on the port of John

There was one time though the dude had to have taken every single article of clothing off and threw him in there and Wasn't a great time for me, but Either that or he didn't make it to the point. My kid at the last wedding we went to we got to put him in the nice outfit with a little bow tie. It was so cute and then he shit himself went all over. Yeah so we just had to dump the outfit in the bathroom. Same thing with that guy. Did you get a picture first at least? We got one picture. That was it. was it my wife disappointed I like that you left that for the people cleaning up after the wedding hey we're dumping this we're just telling them we didn't dress our kid up did you at least throw it out or did you just leave it in case no no we

threw it away in the garbage yeah don't yeah you didn't you didn't put that like I would take the bag put in the bag zip it up tight and then put in the wash when you get home that way that was well So we had to do that with the next outfit. Oh, so we didn't bring an extra outfit So then I we had to borrow another outfit from my niece What would Gabe do in this situation? That's true Have you ever found anything valuable you ever find a watch down in the, down in the pooper? No, not yet. I mean, I still got my, you know, my time put in, but yeah, nothing yet. That's too valuable.

Is it as shitty as we think cleaning porta potties is, is it not so bad is like does it get a bad rap? Um Honestly, it's not that bad. I mean the summer heat start very great right now. It's not too bad, but honestly, I don't really touch anything gross and You know some of those guys they look out there and they put the whole hazmat suit and the gloves on but I'm not too worried about that. One time I was doing a gig and I needed to use the bathroom and the bathroom was like, it was a restaurant

and the bathroom was like right there in the restaurant. And I was like, I don't know how this is gonna be. And I'm about to do a gig here. I don't wanna blow this thing up and then go, hey, let's do some comedy. So I went out back. I found a porta potty and pooped in there and it was worth it. I was very happy that I mean, it seemed disgusting.

And I think it would have been worse if people in the restaurant go, is that the comedian out in the porta potty? But I did it. And I think that really shows what kind of guy you are. Yeah. You know, yeah. A stand up guy and showing gave your appreciation for the porta pot business. I think we've all have had a porta pot story where it saved us. Yeah. And you know, another time I was in an Amish part of Tennessee

and I was using the porta potty there and I and then the lock on the porta potty was not good Like I turned it, but I didn't lie. It didn't latch Yeah, and then this Amish lady opened the door on me and I may have ruined her life Wow Yeah, she ran away. She probably never seen anything. I know she ran away and I Still think about it Wow He ran away and I still think about it. Wow. I was imagining like what ruined your life is not that you were shitting and that your pants are down. It's how you were sitting. Yeah. It's one leg up on the side.

Just kind of like, yeah, it's kicking back. And I was reading the magazine. Almost weekly. I mean, you did bring up being a hot shitter before you a guy who takes your shirt off? I've taken my shirt off a few times. Yeah. I mean, when you it's like, hey, get in there. And you're like, this is a work's going to need to be put in here. Take my socks off and my shirt. Yeah. Sometimes like just so I can focus, I'll just set my phone down.

Yeah. You know, it's like on the on the tub side of the tub. You're like, all right, that's going to go there. I got to really focus here. Yeah, sometimes. Yeah, you can feel a lot of pressure inside. And then you take the pants off. You're like, I got to strip down here. I got to I won't be in here for a minute.

Let's get comfortable. It's kind of funny. Get a fan like in marriage. In marriage, my wife now knows when I need to shit. Really off of the way you're walking, how bad my farts are, how I'm walking. Oh, wow. So sometimes you just be like, do you need to do you need to go to the bathroom? So it's again, I'm just like a toddler these days. Yeah. Is there a certain piece of media that really kind of gets you in the mood

to relax and get it going there? Like, is there is there an Instagram account that makes you nervous and that Just allows things to happen. I don't think so. I wish I don't mind I like to watch an old-school wrestling video while I'm while I'm really yeah like a whole yeah Yeah, something like that Rick Flair. I love a old wrestling clip. Do you remember the crusher? No, Oh Milwaukee guy. Okay, the crusher? No. Oh, Milwaukee guy. OK, the crusher. And when you're in Milwaukee, there's a statue to him.

I'll look him up. Next poop. I'll look up the crush. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You'll thank me later. OK. Yeah. Hey, Gabe, is there any way as an engineer that you could revolutionize the porta pot business? You know, have you been thinking about that? Like how do you really change the Porta pot game? Oh, this is kind of why I wanted to call in, you know, I love my ideas, but I want to know

specifically for miles since he, uh, he was in the whole construction business. I want to know from the guys themselves what I can do to make it better. Oh, what a great guy. What a great, I mean, your boss is going to love it, but just better toilet paper would be nice. You know, that's one thing I think you should always spend money on is to what about the days in the porta potty? Wow.

Now we're using rainwater. Yeah. Rainwater bidets and you're not going to get, you're not going to get power out there. So they just put like a pedal in front of you. Like you got to pump it. Yeah. You pump your feet and it just splashes water. Yeah. Yeah. That's like a port of port of idea. You can put a water tower on top of the port of potty, you know, the whole top just catches the rainwater and it goes down and then you pedal and it's That's a great idea. You can put a water tower on top of the porta potty, you know? Yeah, the whole top just catches the rainwater,

and it goes down, and then you pedal, and it splashes on your ass. I mean, this is, we are cooking with gas right now. I feel like we got to patent this thing, Gabe. You're a business partner with us now. Oh, yeah, I might have to talk to my boss up with that. And if he doesn't like it, I'll just go out and start my own company then yeah, exactly

Your disruptor is what that's called it. Oh, yeah and take over the name John, you know, you're like it's a port of Gabe now You've heard of the porta John but now try the Gabe. It's got like a cooler in there. You can is a vending machine or better toilet paper. Yeah. And you should have a guy in there that's, you know, that guy in those high end bathrooms that's like pulling out the paper for you. You should have a guy in your portapots who's just making sure everything's OK. This is what I think. Yeah. You two options.

You have you have the free port porta potty that everybody can use. And then you have a porta potty that costs five bucks. But that one has some luxury to it. Yeah, it's kind of like a, like a, the Delta sky lounge in the airport. That's what I'm saying. You could get a monthly pass. If you're on the construction site,

you get your little key fob. You're paying monthly for that's the port of Gabe. Yeah. Patted seats. It's got gold bond the port of Gabe. Yeah, padded seats. It's got gold bond in there. Yeah. A little chafe and going on on the work site. Yeah, that's a good idea. I like your guys better.

He's more more than what I was thinking. Yeah, it sounds crazy to have a subscription service to a porta potty, but there are so many people that would sign up. I would pay for that just in the city. Any city you're in, there should be a thing, an you know, like a pay bathroom in here. So it's like you're out here walking around. You got to pee. You can't find any place.

You got to go into a bar, pretend like you're going to buy a drink just to use the bathroom. Yeah. Give us just paid toilets out here. Give us the option. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of people do have some extra cash to pay for that luxury Yeah, you think about all the other things we're spending money on five dollars on a coffee these days You're buying a coffee just to poop. I'll just spend the money Yeah

That would save coffee. Yeah, that would send the price of coffee back down for everyone Yeah, and it's on Google Maps, you know, you just type it in. Where are the bathrooms? It pops up the port of Gabes. Yeah. What a game. Or there's an app for port of Gabe. And then think about all that data you collect. Well, so yeah, so now you're thinking, yeah, we came up with an app for port of bodies when I was working construction. Cause again, it's like, you never know where a good one is. And it was a porta potty app where you would drop a pin if there was a porta potty there, and then you would rate it. So then the other construction workers be like, this one's got a two star. I don't want to go shit there. If I go two blocks over, there's one that's got four stars.

I'll probably go to that one. Only for long, though. Yeah. And the ratings change drastically quick. Yeah. And then it's like you link it up with the Porta Gabes and then they can come service something that's really out of commission. Smart. Very smart. And then the whole motto was drop a poo, drop a pin. Because that's the real problem going on out here, right? Is like we all know that we we gotta pee and poop out here. Everybody, we all gotta do it.

But yet there are some of these cities are like holding us hostage on it. They're like, oh no, we don't have any public restrooms. And it's like, why not though? You know I gotta do it. I don't wanna do it. I'm not out here going, I hope I gotta pee. You know, it just happens.

It does happen. And then you wanna give me a ticket if I'm peeing on the playground. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean. Yeah.

We've had a lot of issues with people just pissing outside our building. It's like, well, let them go to the bathroom in the building. Yeah. You know? It's not. It's a pretty easy resolve here. I think we're on to something.

And some places now, they let you go to the bathroom, but they make it so hard. You got to go talk to a specific person that is the holder of the key to get into the bathroom. Oh, yeah. Oh, the key thing. And there's a code and then an eye scanner, retina scanner, just to get you into the bathroom.

Yeah. We need key fobs. Anytime you're getting a key that's attached to a big spoon or something or a ruler, you know? Yeah. You know that you're probably in for a questionable situation. Oh, yeah. The people holding the bathroom the most hostage are the worst ones.

Yeah, they're the ones who have not cleaned that bathroom for at least a week. Yeah, they hold the key just so the Department of Health can't get it. the key just so the Department of Health can't get it. Well, back to the border bodies, the premium ones, everyone that pays for it should get their own keys so they'll never have to deal with that or other people breaking into it that don't have the subscription and yeah. Yeah. If you get caught, death penalty. If you get caught using it and you're not paying for it, death penalty.

It's that simple. Yeah. That would suck. So bad. It's running down your leg and you're like, if I do this, I'll die. Yeah. So I just have to do it right here outside.

Or pay $5 a month. Yeah. Death or five bucks a month. You're like doing the little like dance of like, I gotta go. And you're like trying to plug in your credit card It's like get into trying to park, you know Every time you park you got to fill out a new app for those. Yeah, that's annoying You got to make it easy an easy add-on. Well, Gabe, I feel like we got a good business cooking man

Anything else you want to say about the gay Gabe? Cooking man anything else you want to say about the gay Gabe? Gave's yeah I'll give you guys 20% Oh Well, we'll take nothing less than 60 Well, we gotta have 20 is three hosts here. We got 20 20 each is what he said Yeah, it's good so worry you'll still be majority owner. We'll put up some funding, right guys. All right, Gabe. Well, we appreciate you calling in today and stay safe out there and good luck getting your engineering degree. Oh, thank you. Appreciate you guys. Of you guys. All right. Love you. Have a good one. Oh, thank you. Appreciate you guys.

Love you guys, all right? Love you, man. You too, have a good one. I gotta tell you, Miles, you remember a couple years ago when I bought that hog, that Harley Davidson, that 1998 Sportster? Yep. 1200 CC Dynamite.

Well, I gotta tell you, it's scary to ride a motorcycle these days because everyone's out there on their phones. They're missing your blinkers and everything. You know, you can be riding perfectly on that motor hog, but other people may not be driving, may not be seen, may not be paying attention to you. Well, what do you do if you get a hit? I call Nikolai, call Nikolai right away. Cause Nikolay will get you taken care of. They'll get you that money that you deserve from the insurance companies you need. And listen, always wear your helmet. Okay. Cause

you don't have a head. Can't call Nicolay. Don't lose your head. Don't lose your head. Call Nicolay now. Hi, is this Stacy? It is. Yeah. Stacyacey, you got miles, Charlie and dusty sleigh on the line from the bellied up podcast. I hear that you don't want to go to your sister's wedding. Can you tell us what's going on there? Absolutely not. I not want to go. Hold on Stacey. Hold on. One sec. Hello. Okay. Your sister hacked into the lawn. Yeah. She's not happy about this. You have good service over there. Is that us? Not really. I'm in a power audit area that we haven't had power for a long time. Well, tell your sister you didn't get the invitation. Right. There we go. Yeah. You call her right

now. She'll only get half of it. Yeah. I can't cheer wedding. Listen. E-vite. Right. Yeah. I'd love to. I'd love to have that excuse. Sorry. You can't come. Is this a little bit better or not? Yeah, it is. Yeah. Okay. So why don't you want to go to your sister's wedding? I mean, the long and the short, she's just a bitch and I just really don't want to go. It's one of those things moved away from home and just moved to the big city and just kind of this became a bitch to put it as bluntly as can be. Big city of what? It's just like my.

Cedar Rapids. What's that? What are we talking? What's the big city? Unfortunately, Charlie, it's Milwaukee. Oh, wow. The big city of Milwaukee. Big time.

Geez, Louise. I have absolutely nothing against Milwaukee. I promise. Okay. Well, what city are you in? Well, I am up in northern Michigan. Upper peninsula? About 40 miles. No, north. Okay. So I'm about 40 miles.

Sounds like it. Yes. Yes, it does. All right. So what kind of she's also she's also pastor and she's always doing this. Oh, my life is so hard. I'm a pastor, but whatever. And it's like, okay. Oh yeah. And she keeps doing this. So go ahead. Yeah. Just the classic pastor, you know, classic sister. But when I think of pastor, that's what I think of is, oh, my life is so hard. Right. Nothing.

I mean, nothing. I mean, it's also I'm also an 80. A conversation, so well, just tell her women aren't supposed to be pastors. Oh, simple, simple that there is not going to be a damn thing about this thing. That's going to be simple. Yeah. Glorified family picnic. Simple or simple.

What's that simple or sinful? I don't know what you're saying. Simple. OK. I mean, what kind of low key, what kind of bitchy behavior are we talking about? It's a poor, I can't afford this then make changes do something. Yeah. And I have nothing against the guy she's marrying. I have only met

him once when she brought him to my wedding. You know, nothing against me, but it's just kind of like, I don't know. She's just a she came to your wedding, though. You got to go to hers. Yeah. Yeah. Unfortunately, I was going to tell you just to start not go and then stop even talking to her. That's what I would do. But she can. I would love to do that. I do it right.

Yeah. And my family just in general, just they drive me that shit banana to begin with. And it's just, my dad doesn't want to go there. And it's like, my mom is the only one who was excited about this thing. And like my mom never even offered to let me any kind of bridal shower and this whole hoopla for her. Okay, here we go. We're starting to see the layers. We found it out. You're the daddy's girl She's the mama's girl and you're both jealous of each other now when she was going jealous. Oh, right. No Definitely not jealous at all When she was going to your wedding

Do you think she was calling in a podcast saying how much of a bitch you are? Or do you think that this is a, I don't know. Okay. That's that she can do whatever she wants. She's an adult. Sounds like a maybe also could be all these suggestions, total judgy glorified pic that we had. It's one and seven today she wants to have. But do you think maybe when you guys are having phone calls, you're just getting lost in a miscommunication here? Maybe you're just, you're not communicating well because your signal's bad. Yeah, sorry. I'm really sorry.

Uh, don't be sorry. We just, we just wonder if there's a beautiful relationship budding underneath, you know, the resentment. Yeah. Yeah. Right. We used to be close. We I mean, get each other. But I mean, we I mean, once you move away from home and all that big, all that stuff. And but it's just like, I don't even know

who she is anymore. And I just like, I don't want to go to this thing. I got my husband out of it, but I, I mean, she, I have to stand up over there and do the bridesmaid thing. And I mean, it was kind of, I'm deaf. She definitely asked me only out of, and it's like, I, whatever. I think this is what I think. I think you go have a few drinks when the bridesmaids are giving the speeches You take the mic let all this out at the wedding on the mic be like this bitch Moved away to the big city and we're all sick of it Just do a stand-up set like a dream come true. Yeah, you turn it into an episode of Jerry Springer

Yeah, you know film it put it on the internet if you're come true. Yeah. You turn it into an episode of Jerry Springer. Yeah. You know, film it, put it on the internet. If you're going there. Yeah, that's a solid move and we'll help you write it. We'll spitball it with you, too. Wonderful. What's her name? I just the first day. Teresa. Teresa. Yeah. Teresa, the pastor, Mother Teresa.

Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Here we go. Yeah, Teresa the pastor mother Teresa Here we go always I mean what was me and Just always Centered and just like good heaven what she says. Oh, what she say is hard. What's hard about being the pastor? Oh You know, I just tune it out. I don't even know maybe having to like talk to people You know, I just tune it out. I don't even know. Maybe having to like talk to people. Oh, it's just so hard to write sermons. Sounds like neither one of you like really talking to people.

I mean, it's a Midwest. We can talk about our feelings. You're like, she's a bitch, but I don't know. I never listen to her. It sounds like every like 45 year old guy has given up on life talking about his wife. She's a bitch. Stop listening to her. Yeah. Is there any, I'm trying to figure out a way to like for like duck out and go to a bar somewhere and just like ignore you. But yeah, I think you should definitely make the whole day about

you. I think you should definitely tip out early and get everyone pissed off and totally hijacked today. That's always a good plan. Just take an edible before you go. Does everyone notice? Take a really potent edible and then just go. And then that way you'll be so paranoid about yourself.

You'll actually start to enjoy your sister. There we go. Oh my God way you'll be so paranoid about yourself. You'll actually start to enjoy your sister. There we go. Oh my God. I actually love her. Yeah. You know, do ecstasy. Maybe then you will. Now we're talking. Yeah. Is there any silver lining you see? Any family members that you're excited to reconnect with at this wedding? That's a good question. Um, I saw them all, uh, probably. Um, I mean all the ones that I would, it's not a bit, we are a big family. Um, and all the ones that, I mean, I guess I would be, I saw a couple of weeks that are, um, bridal shower and like, I only see them like once or twice

a year anyway. Like I'm good for a year. So no one. No, not really. I think we're seeing that maybe you might be the problem of the family. I don't know. Is that, you think that can be accurate?

And that's okay. Okay, okay. Sure could be. All right. Well, I like that you're upfront about it though. Yeah. You seem to have a good self-awareness on this situation. So what did her bridal shower have that yours didn't that you're so upset about? It existed. It happened.

Oh, I didn't even I didn't I didn't have. Sounds like the problem's your mom, though. I mean, I'll be honest with you. Your mom's causing division. She's causing division here. Yes. I mean,. I mean, I'll be honest with you. Your mom's causing division. She's causing division here. Yeah. I mean, she, I mean, yeah, it's not right that your mom did that to you though. She didn't do a bridal shower for you, but she did one for your sister.

That's not right. That's not right. I think you should bring it up on the wedding day. Uh, perhaps during the speech. Yeah, absolutely. I don't think that they're like doing speeches. I don't know. I haven't think that they're like doing speeches. I don't know. I haven't asked to do one. Thank God. I can't imagine why.

Right. Exactly. Well, the thing about a wedding is if there's a microphone there, no one's going to stop you from taking that microphone. So I think you've got to take what's yours and you just got to get it off your chest as dusty said and maybe Maybe take it maybe even take it the other way though, right? You take the mic and you just get real delusional with it and you talk about how close you and your sister and how

everything Yeah, just say it's been really nice over the last few years. I love that. You've moved to Milwaukee I get to come and visit you in the big city. We go to the Fawn statue together and Yeah, just say it's been really nice over the last few years. I love that you've moved to Milwaukee I get to come and visit you in the big city. We go to the Fawn statue together and Right. I love your your messages on Sunday mornings. So great. You're a good Yeah, I'm even thinking of not being an atheist based on your sermons Yeah, you should definitely bring up your atheism at her wedding. That would be a good move. Yeah. It's not even something that like my

family knows. It's like that. But don't be an atheist just because of your sister. No, I know like that. This is not something I don't know if Emily knows that, like that, that you believe in, you know, on. I wonder if you trade more, if you might have better cell phone service. Yeah. You know, you should try asking the good Lord for some of them. You got like cricket wireless or what's going on? No, I'm just in the middle of F and nowhere. We haven't had power for 11 days.

The cell service, the power keeps collapsing up on the hill and it's the whole situation. Sounds like you need to move to Milwaukee, man. Great service. There we go, we may have better cell phone coverage. Yeah, the thing about big cities is you can hear every word you say. Yeah.

Right. Yeah. That would be great. Yeah. I don't know that we solved anything on this phone call, but I think we all understand each other better You know, I like that you just agree with us. You're like there you go. Yeah, and You're very agreeable for someone that hates their sister and the Lord And the Lord, right? Yeah. When was the last time you, did you grow up in the church?

Was that your head? Oh, you did. Okay. So you're the one rebelling. She's the one embracing. Right. Got it. You guys went polar opposite ways there.

Holy smoke. Yeah. What? I mean, I'm not a fan of the four, four is a week, four months straight pretty much. And now working at a camp is not easy. So. Oh, you work at a camp. I do. Yeah, I work at a camp and retreat center, instant housekeeping and all that kind of stuff. Everything in between.

Oh, camps are basically a form of religion anyway, if you think about it. And you seem a little woe is me about it. I think you and your sister are a lot alike. Are you twins? I'd like to get her on the phone. I'd like to get Teresa on the phone here. Well, that's what we talked about.

We talked to a lot of these people. We got to get the other side of the story. Yeah. But we would be bartending. Right. Do that podcast. So it's rather right. Our you got Teresa's number. Can we give her a call? See if we can work this out. I mean, come on. Don't you have it?

I don't know. I got to go to the places where there are pastors. I'm Catholic. So we we. Oh, OK. We call them priests, you know. And certainly your sister wouldn't fly. Yeah, not quite. Right. Give it a few decades. Yeah.

He could be a nun though. If she was. Yeah, but it kind of just sounds like you're going through your angsty teenager phase, you know, like fuck you, mom, you know, rebel against everything. I hate everyone. All of that. I think get out of town, you everyone, all of that. I think get out of town, you know, get some space. Maybe you get out of town, get some space. You'll be like, Oh, you know what?

Teresa's sawn to something here. You got to get away from this family. Do you have a good therapist or bartender that you see on a regular basis? Bartender, absolutely. Bartender. Nice. That's all you need. Yeah. Well, we gave you a good starting point here, and I think you take what, you know, reflect on what we've said here, take that to your bartender and just do weekly checkups on where

you're at, you know? Yeah, this conversation has gone belly up, I're at. You know? Yeah. This conversation has gone belly up. I think. I think so. Yeah. That was like when we named the podcast, we didn't make sure it's a lead up. Otherwise it's just belly up.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But if you do get better service, call us back because we may have missed heard some of the stuff that you said, but we do hope that you and your sister at the end of the day, find the peace and the love that you both so deserve. I'm going to hold my breath. Well, don't do it too long. Thank you for the right. Arn, but thanks for the advice. Yeah. Just do some drugs.

I can go. Oh, I recommend a can't go at ecstasy or LSD before the wedding and just let it all hang out and then let them go. I forgot your name, but let them go has fallen apart. Yeah. Yeah. Smart. Whatever you do is hijack the whole wedding from your sister. That's actually the right way to get back at her. Yeah. There we go. Well, thanks for calling in today. Appreciate it. Absolutely. Watch cell phone coverage. I hope you guys have a great rest until you're focused and high and watch out for you watch out for deer too. That I caught. Oh dear. We'll see you soon. Yeah. Nice, nice gal. Yeah. You know, yeah. On the surface. And that was like our head was on straight.

Yeah. It's typical family dynamic stuff here, you know you know, and girls especially, they need that relationship with their mother or else you can become an atheist with bad service. You know? Yeah, I mean, it does seem like she has had a falling out with her mom. And then her mom has put her energy into Teresa. And then Teresa moved to Milwaukee and is doing well. It just, yeah, kind of a glow up phase for Teresa. And then this other lady that I forgot her name is just bitter, Stacey is just bitter about it.

And Stacey has got a husband. She said she got her husband out of going to the wedding. I don't know how she did that. It's tough to explore anything with the phone signal. The phone signal. Yeah. I wish my wife would get me out of that stuff. Yeah, I know. We did have to give her props for that. You know, we forgot.

But had the service been better, I wanted to know. And I don't think we're going to get a readable story. But where did the split happen? You know, does this go back to childhood? Did it, did it happen recently? Cause I think we could have really gotten a little bit more, but yeah, it might be that this has been happening her whole life.

Like her parents forgot to throw her birthday party. And then her sister got this one with a bouncy castle and like the whole thing. And it's just been going on and on. Yeah. I think she should, you know, abandon her family a little bit. I think just give some space, make your family come to you. Yeah. Play a little hardball. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Don't go. Yeah. If you're at a bar, you don't go hit on a girl. You hang back and have her come to you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And get a job, you know, don't just work at a camp. All good. Thanks. All good starting points. Well, now I know it's a real job. I'm sure it is. Yeah, it's a job for sure.

Well, I have a lot of hope for her. Alright kids, get the round. We're all just doing a bit here. This is comedy and you know, everybody's great. What was her name again? Stacey Stacey. Stacey's mom's kind of a bitch. Yeah, I've heard she's got it going on.

Yeah, I wonder. I wonder if that might have started it. You know, she sounded of the age when Stacey's mom had come out and she had to deal with that. Yeah. And Teresa didn't because there's no Teresa's mom. True. Yeah. It's too many syllables.

Sounds like Stacey and her dad hate their mom and her poor mom just has Teresa. Yeah. So she's like, let me try to hang on to my one daughter. Yeah. And that's pissing off the daughter. She's already lost. One thing that's just crazy is how weddings can just bring out the worst in families. Yeah. Weddings and lake houses.

Yeah. If someone leaves you a lake house, leaves the family a lake house, people will, I got a buddy. It happened. And then now the family is torn apart because someone just didn't sell off the lake house. Yeah. Keep pulling my mic cord. That'll be I like to think that Teresa being a pastor is going to officiate her own wedding. I was wondering that that's the kind of person she is. Yeah, yeah. She literally goes from the whatever the what do you call it?

Mediator. Oh, no, that's when they get divorced. Efficient and then steps over to the thing. Yeah, you know, I see her being a little control free. That's what I think too Yeah, she's a big control and then Stacy's standing there drunk Where's my husband? Yeah Yeah, and all the other club drugs. Now, Stacey seems fun. She agreed with everything we said and she did, didn't she? She does. Well, there you go.

We've kind of found that a lot of people take our shitty advice very well on this podcast. Is there you go in northern Michigan expression, you think? Well, there you go. There you have it. Yeah, there you go. I think so.

I never thought about that. You hear it up there. You get up to the UP a lot? Well, I you go. I think so. You hear it up there. You get up to the UP a lot? Well, I used to. I used to do. There's a lot of not good comedy gigs up there. I like the UP. It's very beautiful, but there's no good comedy gigs.

Yeah, but I did go up there. I saw an eagle up there. Did you? Bald eagle? Yeah, bald eagle. They got a lot of them up there. Yeah, it was beautiful. Yeah.

And I will raise you up on eagle's wings. We grew up Catholic. I feel like I'm being serenaded here. Yeah, yeah, we're trying to convert you right now. Yeah. You know? Yeah. It'll come.

If we got you to the final verse, you know, beg you to shine like the sun. And we've lost all our listeners. Well, all our Christian. You know what I mean? So I'm in. You know, yeah, I'm in already. That's like if you go to a Catholic mass, it's like that's how everyone just sings. They don't actually sing. They just move their mouth and hum a little. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They just give that a lot. They don't even they sometimes to add. Yeah, they've been going back to that. I don a little bit. Yeah, yeah. They just give that a go. In Latin, they don't even.

They sometimes Latin. Yeah, they've been going back to that, I don't know why. Yeah. Yeah. They change the script too. So then if you go with your parents, you say the wrong words and they know. Well, that was like kind of,

there was a couple of years there when they changed all of the responses in the service. You knew who was not going to church or not because people were blurting out the old responses. And you're like, yeah, you haven't been to church in the service. You knew who was not going to church and not because people were blurting out all the responses. And I'm like, yeah, you haven't been to church in a year. It's like going to see the red hot chili peppers, but you haven't heard an album since Californication.

Yeah. Yeah. One of those. Hey, what happens? Yeah. It's a bummer. You're like, give it away. Give it. Oh, I know. This song sounds kind of the same, but not that yeah damn you Anthony Kittis oh Man well, dude. This was a very fun. I had a great time I drank a coffee and wore a corduroy shirt, and I'm getting hot sweat are ya well if you gotta use a portapot We know what's gonna happen with that corduroy shirt. Yeah, it's gonna get messed up. It's gonna be off

Hopefully there's a hook in there to hang there. That's what we should have told Gabe Yeah, a little bit of a closet maybe a lot of clothes hangers and that would be nice It'd be nice to have some hangers dry iron Have a little window where there's a guy go, can you hang on to this while I'm in here? Yeah Coach yeah Can you hang on to this while I'm in here? Code check. Yeah Yes

Be good. We're really on to some with that. What a game Well dusty before we let you go man wound let people know where you're playing again where they can find well Dusty slay comm is where you get tickets. Sometimes people will go I wanted to come to your show but the tickets are $450 I'm like well you're looking at the wrong place. Don't be, yeah, don't be deceived. DustySlay.com. But just for Wisconsin people, I mean, in August 15th, I'll be in Madison. August 16th, I'll be in Milwaukee with Teresa.

November 21st and 22nd, I'm in Wausau, Wisconsin, and Green Bay, Wisconsin. But my announcement has come out today, as of April 8th, for my second half of my tour. So a lot of dates on DustySlay.com. Wonderful. It'd be funny if you got the other side of the story from Teresa.

Like she came up to you after the show, was like, that bitch. I hope Teresa's a listener. I have a feeling that maybe she is because I feel like Stacey would do some kind of petty stuff like this. Like implanted in the podcast she listens to. I think so. Yeah. There'll be a roundabout way to get uninvited.

I hope Teresa listens and doubles down on the invitation. Yeah, she doesn't let her out of promotes her to the maid of honor. Yeah. Ask for a speech. Yeah, that's what I hope. That's what the Lord would want. Yeah. Situations turn the other cheek. Yes. No. Uh huh. Well, does he? Thanks for coming on, man.

This is great. I appreciate you guys. Appreciate you guys. Thanks for tuning in to another episode of the Bellied Up podcast. Remember to tip your bartender. We'll see you the next one.