Bellied Up - For The Love of Dairy #126

Episode Date: November 14, 2024

In this episode, we're at Slim's Bar and Grill in Bemidji, MN. Our first caller is from Dallas and is tired of people texting and driving all the time. The next caller is a full-time dairy farmer in Wisconsin, who’s having trouble finding the right gal. Lastly, Bemidji local Jason wants answers to why the coffee at church has changed. Don't have time to call in? Call our Voicemail line and tell us what's on your mind 👇 218-303-5095 Check out our Clips Page 👇 https://www.youtube.com/@BelliedUpClips?app=desktop Get Yourself a "Road Hunting for Ditch Chickens" hat and other merch here 👇 https://ohhyoubetcha.com/products/ditch-chickens-hat Check out Charlie Berens Special "Midwest Goodbye" 👇 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wEzagimGjc Check out Myles' Podcast "You Betcha Radio" 👇 https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQK1ATqc6L9wz4FAiun8kKw

Welcome back to another episode of the bellied up podcast. It is your host miles. You bet you guy here with my lovely buddy, Charlie Barron fired up Barron's Charlie fired up Barron's coming in a hot and ready to kick some ass and take some names today. You are turning over a new leaf. Yeah. Fired up. Why do they say turning over a new leaf? I don't even know if that's the real phrase. I mean, if you think about it, they say turning over a new leaf? I don't even know if that's the real phrase. I mean, if you think about it, if you turn over a new leaf, it probably looks just like the other side of the leaf. Since it's a new leaf, it's not rotted. It just fell off the trees are kind of like snowflakes. Charlie, they they're all different. They're

all different and they run our society today. Snowflakes. Anyways. Nice. Yeah. Did you like that? That was good. That was pretty good. Um, well I'm glad you're fired up. You know, I'm fired up about Charlie being here in Bemidji, Minnesota. Oh, the mid G beautiful this time of year. Some would say the whores, some would say the home of Paul Bunyan. Some would be incorrect because we all know Paul Bunyan is from which we can get into later. Charlie, I will say this Paul Bunyan, no heck of a porn stash. He does. You know, he's got the, uh, isn't this the one here? Does he have a beard? No, he's just got like, just got the pencil. Stash got the pencil. Stash. It's kind of like one

of those things that, you know, like remembering what's the Nelson, the men Nelson Mandela Mandela Mandela effect where you remember things wrong. I guess I didn't know if he had a mustache or a beard when I started thinking about it. Well, and that's cause a lot of Paul Bunyan's have beards, but the one here has got a porn stash total Total porn stash. Oh yeah, look at that. Woo. Yeah, I mean, that fella is, you know. Now I actually think there probably is a corner of the internet that would be

into Paul Bunyan activities. That Paul Bunyan is probably really good in the YMCA community. If you look at that, He looks like a village person You know I Mean that a very good. Okay, bro Bro gay way We don't know which way Paul Bunyan goes. No. Yeah, that's what he looks like though

Look him up and tell me couldn't be in the village people them up and tell me couldn't be in the village people. Anyways, here we are miles. I love this bar at Slim's bar and grill here in Bemidji and the the bar here is a viable. We got here a little early. We had some lunch. I had the special today, which was a loaded potato soup. Was it loaded with potatoes?

It was yes. Very good. Did you have potato chunks in there or was it the survey chunks? Okay. It was loaded heart potatoes. It was. Yes. Very good. Did you have potato chunks in there or was it the sort of a chunks? Okay. It was loaded. Hardy. It was. And, uh, you may think I'm crazy Charlie, but they have some world famous barbecue sauce to grab. I don't think you're crazy. This, if I were to pick a place with a world famous BBQ sauce. It is the black dog. Wait, beers, black dog, barbecue sauce. All the original. Um, it's very good. If you're ever in Bemidji, you got to swing in and get some barbecue sauce. I put it in my potato soup. Did you? It was

pretty good. Did you taste it on its own? Is it really hot? No, it's not hot. Should I do a taste test? Yeah, so taste test of beer's black dog barbecue. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. That is a party on the pallet, Miles. I'll tell you that right now. Yeah. A little sweetness in there. Little hit of spice, but not too much.

We are in Minnesota. You're getting a note of spice. A note of, like there's a little pepper in there, for not too much. We are in Minnesota getting a note of spice, but notice like there. There's a little pepper in there for sure. It's good. Yeah. Taste. It does not taste like a black dog. I can tell you that. It does. I wouldn't have anything to compare to. Oh, you haven't lived miles anyways.

I like that. I can see why that's that's award winning. I love this bar though. I mean, I'm I'm just settling in. I just got here, but already I'm counting like 420 points. A lot of antlers, a lot of taxidermy. I got a beaver, got a bobcat. What else we got? Oh God. Bemidji state hockey jersey. I have one of those miles. Oh do you? Yeah, there's an elk over there. Is that a mountain lion over there? Jake? Where's the elk elk over there? Oh He's hiding There's a moose. Oh, holy smoke great vibes in here. Yeah, and a scary moose

They got it all dialed up for Hallows Eve Wonderful. You guys got a swing on into slims here in Bemidji. It's a great vibe. Merch game is strong. I think by the end of this, I'm going to have a whole new wardrobe when I leave. Oh, you like the merge game. I'm going to, are you getting one of those jeans shirts like my dad used to wear big jean shirt guy? Hang on one second. I'm getting a line from the fella. Say that again. There's a beaver playing piano right up above you. Oh yeah. Oh, we got a piano playing beaver up there.

How did I? A lot of beavers in Bemidji, you know. A lot of beavers in Bemidji. Do you know that, Miles? Oh yeah. Sir, what's your name? Jason. Jason, you're from here?

Yes, yes. What's your favorite thing about Bemidji? The lakes. He likes the lakes? Okay, clever. Lakes guy, yeah. Fisherman. What's yourji? The lakes. He likes the lakes. Clever. Lakes guy. Yeah. Fisherman. What's your fish? Walleye. Oh he's a walleye guy. What's the biggest walleye you ever caught? 31 and a quarter. Say it again. 31 and a quarter. I see his eyes

charting a little. I think he's fibbing a bit. I think it's just 31. It was a Canada does a count. Oh Canada. Geez that's like fishing an aquarium up there. Well they use the metric system up there, so you're confusing inches with centimeters. 2.54 centimeters to an inch. 2.5 centimeters to an inch? Oh, that was a wiener joke, wasn't it, or no? I got several centimeters.

You got several centimeters. Good for you. I liked that vibes are right here today. Miles vibes are right. They are. And Charlie's you got a nice shirt on. Oh yeah. He's speaking of the merch game. You know, you're getting all horned up

about the merch game in here. We get up at your merch right now. We got new bellied up shirts, folks. Bellied up. This is a bellied up logo on the front. And hang on, hang on. And on the back it says, if you can read this, I'm bellied up to the bar.

How about that? Isn't that sick? You know what's funny though? It should say, if you can read this, there's not a back to my bar stool. Ah, that'd be good. Yeah. For there is and you can still read it.

Oh, you can. You guys are smart about that. Yeah. And then Charlie, we also, the classic road hunt for ditch chickens. We now got it in a shirt. Why it took us this long to put it on a shirt. I don't know. I do pure laziness, pure unadulterated laziness. And just when you thought that. So guys go to, Oh, you bet you dot com to check out the new merchandise bellied up shirt we also have a road hunt for ditch chickens blaze orange sweatshirt for hunt season on the do we have that coming out oh yeah dang is it out now yeah we got one over there we can on another episode oh i want to wear that so guys you got to go to all you bet you dot com. Check it all out. Oh, H.H.

You bet you dot com. The belly dot merch is on there. And one final merch comment, Charlie. Yes, they also have a shirt here at Slim's that says home of the friendly beavers and an occasional cougar. Oh, see. You see what they did there, Miles. Play on words. You got beavers and cougars. I that's a shirt I'm going to see what they did there. My play on words. You got Beavers and Cougars.

I that's a shirt I'm going to see if I can't see if they got any of my size. You know, Excel, I'm a large I'm working on the Excel, trying to beef up. I'm working on the large. We're going the opposite. We're an Excel today. Trying to get into a larger trying to beef up being Excel. Trying. I'm trying to just eat three salad meals a day. Are you trying to eat one solid meal a day? Are you? Yeah. Well, before you know it, we'll be fighting each other.

We should fight each other. We should like, like one of those Jake Paul people. Who does he fight? Yeah. Like play up an actual boxing match. You mean? Yeah. Juicy Jake Paul recently. No, he's got like a big old stomach. I saw it on a, on a, on a, on a, on a, on a, on a, on a,. Juicy Jake Paul recently. No, he's got like a big old stomach

I saw it on a I don't know some way. It's steroid belly could be yeah. Is that a thing you get steroid? Oh, so I imagine if you and I did a boxing match Yeah, like a third of the way through the first round we would be gassed totally Dude, by the end it would just be a third of the way through the first round, we would be gassed. Totally. Yeah, I do. By the end, it would just be. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're doing half a handmaker.

I actually box like in my spare time a little bit off. No, I'm get out of here. What can I not talk about my hobbies? You have no spare time. When are you boxing? I work out and sometimes my workout is going to the box. Let's see it here. I'll hold your mic. Let's see if let's see a one, two, three move here. That was a four move miles.

I'm a little slow, admittedly. So I was waiting for like a I the exhale. I didn't want to draw too much of a scene here. You know, I didn't want people to see, you wouldn't want to draw too much of a scene at a bar. That would be way too much. Broke up a fight last night. Did you use the one tube there? No, I didn't. It was at a concert and this guy was being a wanker and he was getting after it with another fella. I just stepped right in. I was like, hey, hey, hey, let's enjoy the show.

Let's enjoy the show. I was way bigger than this. This was like a little Napoleon fight. You know, he was just a bull barking dog. And I was like, come on, hey, come on, let me take you for a walk, pal. So that felt good. You just held your hand on his forehead and he couldn't swing and hit you. I just stepped in that the step between the two. They were, you know, there was about to be a punch thrown down. So anyways, while you're doing good, keep vibes good at the concert.

Keep vibes good. Why? Why are we getting into these fights? And you know what they taught me in Taekwondo Charlie? Oh, hang on. There's a flex right there. Miles did Taekwondo. Yeah. From age five to nine. What Taekwondo did they teach you? You only use it in self-defense. So I'm proud of you for not throwing the swing first punch.

I never wanted to throw a first punch. I don't. It's stupid to fight. Let me just say it because here's this. Let's say you're good at fighting. Okay. Solid. Chances are a person you're fighting, not going to find you connect with them. Gets knocked out falls on the pavement. Now you got a man's slaughter charge. Not worth it. Not worth the jail time guys. So Charlie, should we do some callers? Yeah, let's do it. Good. We need you to stay fired up. I got to stay fired up and focused. That's right.

That's a big, big deal here. Maybe we'll do a coffee review again. Good. All right. College do it. Why don't you belly up to the bar with us and tell us what you want to get off your chest? Well, the one big grant I have, I drive about 45 minutes to and from work every day. I'm a work for a general contractor, the superintendent. So I'm on the road quite a bit.

And it's all these dang slow drivers that just don't pay attention anywhere. They're going like 35 in a 55, going 20 in a 40. Oh, and causing wrecks everywhere. Now you're saying they're causing wrecks, but how many wrecks have you seen it cause? That's a good question. I saw one earlier this week, actually. Somebody wasn't paying attention and pulled out going really slow and got rear-ended by the person in oncoming traffic.

And what did you say as you went by? Probably some explosives followed by an idiot or something like that. Yeah, that'll happen. Well, what would you recommend drivers do? You think that that person should have waited or should have done that right out of the chute? I mean, me personally, I would have gone there right out of the chute. But the smart thing to do would be to wait, I would say. Are you one of those guys that if someone's driving in a way you deem not appropriate

that you do the thing where you drive up past them and you look at them, do the stair down possibly if they're going really slow, maybe the drive by stair down DBSD. Listen, Hey, we know it'd be funny if someone was doing the drive by stair down or in, I call it, giving them the chin, give them the chin. Oh, give them the give them the chin. Well, they're doing that and they're doing the stare down. They rear ended someone in front of them. That would be the ultimate karma. That was what we call bad karma. Why do you think all these people are driving so?

Do you think it's on their phone or did they just legalize the weed in your town? I think both of that because I'm near near Austin. So we get quite quite a bit of that. And then you drive up next to them and they're texting away on their phone. So it's a phone thing. I see. Yeah. But how do you know they were on their phone? Maybe they were just going school. Maybe it was a student driver. You know, how can we be so sure?

Well, I, I've seen a lot of people cause if they're going so I'll go around them and they're sitting there looking down at their phone with one in their head and one on the wheel. It's ridiculous. Yeah, that is ridiculous. People got to put, well, here's the question. I don't think any of them are going to be getting off their phone anytime soon. You know, we can, we can put all the signs on the side of the road that say, don't text and drive. And then we all feel better about it. We fixed it. No sign, but the, but the problem is, is all the people it's intended

for never see the sign cause they're looking at their phone and not the road. That's true. It's kind of just an echo chamber of people who don't text and drive. We are not serious. Very true. We just as a society are not serious about not texting and driving because all those dumb driving apps are like, was there a police there? You know, they marks off a police. Was there a police there? Confirm yes or no. It's like, I'm not supposed to be touching you. Just give me the direction.

Then it puts up an ad while I'm driving. I'm like, who the hell is doing that? That's my big question, man. That's that big tech lobby, man. They're over there giving H.J.s to our fellows in Congress just to let this shit fly, you know, it's crazy. It's crazy. The bribery in government, man. Just call it lobbying. It's not bribing anymore.

Hang on, say I get off my soapbox. Sorry, Miles. There's fun up there for a little bit. Glad you're back. Yeah. Sorry. You are fired up this episode. I'm fired up. Fired up. So where I was going with that though is would you rather, because they're clearly not going to stop texting and driving, would you rather have a someone texting and driving going slow like you were complaining or going really fast? What's worse? What's better? I guess probably slows better. I mean, if they're all going slow and I can pass them and I'm not texting, I guess that's better. Probably better. But the injuries going slower than faster.

I see it. I'm sorry, Miles, I just see it all as a grand conspiracy. I see it all as a grand conspiracy. Think about it, think about it. We continue to get in these accidents because these phones are a distraction. Then what happens? They're like, well, driverless cars are safer than humans.

Yeah, you are, that's a great conspiracy. And that's just the beginning. Now I just saw there's this thing about the AirPods can be hearing aids. Well, why are the AirPods hearing aids? Why do we need all these hearing aids? Because people have AirPods in the volumes up past 50%. Now your hearing is getting damaged. There are studies about that.

And now more people got to buy AirPods and their ears are even getting more damaged. So they have to keep buying, buying them. And they are just turning us into these robots. Why are they turning? So we have more sympathy when the robot overlords take over. And I will be the first to be killed because I have not been kind. Well, I yeah, you are. You kind of are the number one.

I am. They are like, we got to get rid of that loud mouth. I think we could even maybe throw out the title that you're the number one. I am there like we got to get rid of that loud. I think we could even maybe throw out the title that you're the number one robot hating podcaster in the world. I don't think I don't think I don't. It's not that I hate the robots. Okay. I in fact I'm so nice to Siri. I've said that before, but I am like doing all series work, but I just, I wonder man, Siri knows that you're talking shit behind her back. No, I think she's not listening right now. So even if you're nice to her face, it's actually worse because then she knows you're talking shit behind her back.

I am so in deep on this. You guys enjoy this podcast while it lasts, because soon enough, Miles, it's just going to be talking with a Charlie avatar You know Well, it'll be Charlie AI. It'll be a deep take charlie Charlie exactly and lie is the key word in that char lie. Okay, cuz it won't be true. I'll be dead anyways Let's ask some one more question about this. Diving deeper.

What do you propose we should do about all the textures and drivers going slow? Maybe somebody, if there's like a driver reeducation or something, it's even like on the highways, especially around here, you got your big three, four laners. There's people camped out in the left lane on their phone when there's zero cars on the road yeah you can just go around them but I think what the flow of traffic and everything I think what we should do Charlie this is experimental here okay I can tell this is a hear me out you're not saying hear me out but I every your body language just says hear

me out so you know how they got the Express Carpool Lane thing on the far left side? Yeah. Why don't we flip those and have an opposite of Express Lane, a slow lane for anyone who just wants to text and drive and just keep them away from all the other drivers? Well, that's not a bad idea, Miles. You know, it's like, hey, we can't stop them. Let's just put them in a little kennel off to the side and let them all run into each other.

And then maybe they'll figure it out themselves. The problem is, here's the problem with that, Miles. I hate to poke holes in your argument so early on in it, but that's all right by the merge lane. So in order to get in, you have to break through the death trap of the phone people. The merge lane. So in order to get in, you have to break through the death trap of the phone people. The phone lane. Well, no, the on ramps, they fork.

So you don't have to cut across anywhere. They fork? Yes, there's this separate little highway on the side. Where are we gonna get the money for this, Miles? You gotta go give HJs to our our fellows in Congress. Now you got to be dry riding them stick shift. You know what I mean? True. Anyways, it's a complicated one, but I agree. The problem is the same. I do like, I do like the thought there miles. We just got to find a financial way to make it happen. Maybe we should, uh, uh, like my

mom used to do when I was a kid, cause I was always wanting to do exactly opposite of what she told me to do. Yeah. Let's just start telling people to text and drive. Then they won't want to. I think it's kind of a thrill for them. You know, Hey, I'm not supposed to be texting and driving, but I am. And there's an adrenaline rush in that. Interesting. Let's tell them to text and drive and they'll get bored with it. Cause there's no adrenaline. Isn't that crazy? Like the most boring thing you can do is kind of like be on your phone and you get to ride this friggin like a death trap at 70 miles an hour. People die in these things all the time and we're like, ah, I'm bored. You know, dude, you're going 70 miles

an hour. Like be in the moment, you know, yeah two and a half hour It's 100 miles or so it would take me like two days on horseback back in the day to get here We should that's really the solution. We should start riding horses again. Let's bring back horses bring back horses. That's it I knew we'd find a solution here. Yeah, the economy would crash, but that's all right. You know what economy would crash, but you wouldn't. We could do robot horses that are run by gasoline, so we can still have the. Oh, yeah. And let's make their eyes laser beams.

That's great. Well, Walker, we appreciate you calling in today. This is great. Thanks for listening to the podcast for so long. We really appreciate it. And hey, drive safe out there, my guy. And watch for deer. Well, thank you. Thank you. We'll see ya. Wow. Miles. Yes. We got shots delivered here. You know, I tell you, man, that that just grinds my gears. You know, of course we're all guilty of the phone thing. We're all guilty of it.

Me, Charlie. Yeah, not you. I've never, never. But it's just, I mean, I, you know, did you, my dad always growing up, because we didn't have phones right when I was really young. Yeah. My dad, both though, like we go through a, like McDonald's drive through or something. We get a burger. He was the classic king of driving with his knee. I knew your dad used to do that. The knee, the knee driving, eating the sandwich while driving with the knee. I always, I was like, God, that's so impressive.

My dad is the coolest dad. He can drive with his knee. Oh, no, we hit a deer. Did you frequent the knee drive? The knee driving? Yeah. My my dad would kind of like mess with us a little bit. Well, you know, like get a Charlie horse in there. Or like he'd say, give me your hand.

You know? You got to do it this way because he's driving. And then he'd do this thing where you go, just roll the knuckles like that. Yeah. You get a screaming in the front seat. You know? Just whatever keeps the blood flowing

while you're driving. That keeps you focused. That'll keep you focused. This thing distracts you. It's true. Get back to messing around with your kids a little bit. You know, it's true. I like that. Yeah. So we take another caller. Yeah, let's do it. We got a bar dog coming in. I'm going in right there. Puppy.

We'll call that bar dog. Bar dog. None. Dennis. What a great, great name for that little fella. Oh my gosh. Bring Dennis over here. Is this a, what, who is, yeah, I want to pet the puppy. Oh, what's up? Oh.

I was gonna tell you about that puppy. Freshly shampooed. I got a little slobber on my mouth there. You get to pet him. I got to, but you didn't get to pet him. No, no, that's this is the saddest I've ever seen. And he's very fluffy. Oh, my God. Are you you're a golden retriever guy?

Yeah, I just want to pet the puppy. Yeah, we'll do that. I'll do it later. Yeah, you you pet your puppy. Get him a beer. That'd be nice. Thank you. This is why you got what bet your probably get him a beer. That'd be nice. Thank you. This is why you got. What is your name, sir? Fred Zuppel.

What's that? Fred. Fred comes over, he drops me off a check. It just says Goldpackers and fuck the Bears. I love that. And then it says a Jan. What does it say at the bottom? What's that? Oh, you're a fan. That's a fan. Got it. Ah, cursive. A lost art form. A lost art form. Well, thank you very much. I'm a fan of yours now. Fred, you said, right?

Are you a Packer fan amongst the Viking country here in Bemidji, Minnesota? Yes, I am. Good. Hey, what'd you think about that game on Sunday? Well, our quarterback through, I think two I and INTs that led to 14 points. Yeah. And our kicker missed two field goals. Yeah. You make one field goal, you win the game. You win the game.

The defense stops one of those touchdowns and you win the game. I don't think we lost or I don't think the Vikings won. I think we lost. I think that one's on us. You know, when you let up 28 points in the first half, it's just not a good thing Not a good thing, but we had a great comeback got got my blood flowing at the end I actually took the dogs for a walk on the second half and I missed most of the comeback. Did you really? I had to it was 28 to 7. Yeah, there's only so much the body can take of that. That's why they're like this

Yeah, it's gorgeous weather. Yeah. I was at the game. You were at the game. Oh, yeah. I was at the game. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, no one left, though. No, I didn't see anyone leave. Vikings fans may be there like that. No one no one leaves. And you got to witness the big comeback.

So it had to be fun in the second. It was very, very fun. Lucky to be there. Well, thank you, Fred. And cheers to you. and thank you for this. I'm going to put this on my wall. I've seen your routines a lot, and I know that's your little catch line. Oh, yeah. Catch a lot with that, you know? It's like the old familiar suggestion.

That's beautiful. Thank you very much. Hi, you got Kyle from Appleton, Wisconsin Kyle from Appleton. All right, Kyle belly up to the bar. What's on your mind my guy? All right, so I got a fucking doozy for you All right, Kyle, let's hear the do's I'm dairy farmer. Yeah full-time dairy farmer. Yeah. Full-time dairy farmer, right? Well, me and my girlfriend of four years just broke up, right? You know, sad state of affairs, yada, yada, yada. Yeah.

So how you get back into like the dating game? I don't, I'm a dairy farmer and I live with my grandparents. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing here. I mean, you're just rolling dice here. You know, do your grandparents have friends start there work your way back down to your demographic. That's what I would say All right, so then this is round two of this doozy and this is where you guys I'm real need your help Oh, that does custom home built I just acquired a new house and

Custom home built. I just acquired a new house and we're working on He's gonna do the flooring in the house. Is that like gonna be weird or do I just continue with it? Wait, wait, wait back up father and oh your old father-in-law is to first of all I like how you say you just acquired a new home. How do you acquire? Did you kill the person who was living there? Did you purchase it? Well, unfortunately Time got the best of great grandma. So. Oh, well, may she rest in peace. But regardless, regardless, you've got your ex-girlfriend, right? It was girlfriend, not wife. OK, your ex-girlfriend, your ex-girlfriend's dad is now doing the flooring in this

house. Right because me and him are still real cool you know we text each other about the brewers pretty much every day and make jokes with each other and basically if she was a little bit more like her dad I think we'd still be together. Hey hey you know hey maybe you've been barking up the wrong trees. My guy, when she broke up with you, did you go, can I still go fishing with your dad? Throw back beers on that can am. Do I have to give him back his craftsman toolbox and leather man? Don't want to lose my heart in.

Wow. Miles is getting some feeling in this, you know. What's the next line? God, I don't know. Want to lose my heart in. Please take more time to think about it, Miles. I'll think of the rest of it. I'll think of the rest of it. I'll do another rendition. Sorry. Yeah, we can't, we can't Google and talk to you. I mean, that was like, you were really hitting

some pet. There was passion. You were off key, but there was passion. And of course I've never been on a key in my entire life. Everybody's on some key, but anyways, I'm not even like a broken clock Even right twice a day when it comes to sing Yeah, well, thank you we love you too now I do have a little question on the relationship here. Why'd you guys break up? Well, basically we were both going down two different paths in our lives. At this point, she started working at Pierce manufacturing and well,

she works really weird hours and maybe in a dairy farm. I'm pretty much working 24 hours. And so we lived together for three years out of our four year relationship damn near and you know it just time kind of brought us you know together and time brought us apart so it wasn't like a messy breakup or anything like that but and just you know people coming home angry and yeah you know life gets on. It does. Now who broke up with who was it a mutual breakup or Yeah, it was it was mutual. Okay. Okay, and then how long has it been real quick?

Like a month or two, okay, so it's about time to get out there get the boards going I assume you've made your farmers only profile. Oh no, I don't even know how to do that. I don't have a computer all I got for damn telephone and I don't know how to use the thing. Well, you used it right actually cause you are going to make your bellied up dating profile and you are gonna find your next three and a half to four year relationship on this podcast.

So let's start it off. Give us your name, your age and your height. Cause women love hearing about the height. And if you're not six foot, lie about it. Okay. And goal. Well, I'm Kyle Banker. I'm a full-time dairy farmer at Whitman Family Farms, family owned for four generations now.

We're a century farms. We're over a 100 years old. Congratulations. I am six foot one. I love how he's treating this like a job interview. He's doing a plug right there. It's like this is dating profile, like she's gonna wanna know

if that it's a four generation owned 100 year old farm. Well, he's also smart cause he just got his family farm in the podcast. That is true. He's a businessman, he's a businessman. He's a businessman. All right. So how tall are you? I am six foot one, six foot two is both. He is a dairy.

That's a good point, because, you know, like you get measured without shoes on. But when am I ever in public without shoes on unless I'm at the beach? Yeah. And then by the time they find out your real height, well, you're you're already in bed. Yeah. You're already, uh, horizontal. So there you go. Well, like miles says, you, you gotta fuck on the first date. I said that. Is that something you've said? I mean, I, I'm not going to put it past me. Like it sounds like something I could have said, but I have so many podcasts out there. I'm guessing you probably said that.

I think we calculated it's like 600 hours of me talking at some point. And so we're having, I'm having a tough time sometimes being like, okay, what was my stance on this? I know we talked about this before. What did I say? I tried to remember. It was tough. It is tough. So you probably said that.

All right. Yeah, that sounds like me, I guess. All right. Well, give us some more details. And did you say how do you say how old he is? How old are you? I'm 20. You're 20. You're 20 years old. And you lived with a girl for three years. Let me ask you. Not adding up. You sound like you're 45, first of all. I'm 20 years old and you lived with a girl for three years You sound like you're 45 first of all

Second of all, you know if you saw me, let me paint a picture for you. So what you know step one I got scoliosis already Scoliosis. I have a full goatee go I have a full goatee and beard going on right now and I'm 20 years old okay well hold on isn't scoliosis a girl disease no no no it's a back thing no that's a back disease yeah but it was only the girls in in middle school that got checked for scoliosis not the dudes well girls you remember that yeah no you were an exercise scientist. I was never checked for it. I was never checked for it. I, uh, I got up out of bed one day to go to work and my legs were numb and I had

to have my mom bring me to the hospital to get a x-rays and yeah, they said I got a curvy spine, I guess. Curvy spine hunched like a question, Mark. So what do they do to fix? This by the way, what do they do? Honestly, there is there is no fix for it The only thing I have found that has worked because I did physical therapy have done dry needling I've done a lot of different things. The only thing that fixes is a good tire practice a Good tire what? Oh a good chiropractor

Yeah A good tire what? Chiropractor. Oh, a good chiropractor. Chiropractor. Yeah, I mean, you are a chiropractor's dream. They are licking their chops at you. Yeah, you are spending a lot of that. You are fucking right. Dude, that's what you need to find in a girlfriend. You need to find a chiropractor girlfriend. Then you can save a lot of money.

That is a good idea. Think long-term on this one. You got a lifelong situation going on with your spine. Think smart, be Midwest cheap, find a chiropractor. Do you guys know that chiropractors were invented in Iowa? I just I have no way to prove that wrong, but that doesn't sound right. No, it is right. I'll tell you more details.

His name was Daniel David Palmer. All right. He worked at a medical healing place or a Magnetic healing place, you know where you hang someone on the fridge and you're like, ah, you're healed But he saw this janitor janitor was blind and he said or gender was deaf And he said hey, I see you got a crook in your back Can I fix it and the janitor didn't say anything so he got up there and he you know, and he said, Hey, I see you got a crook in your back. Can I fix it? And the gender didn't say anything. So he got up there and he, you know, and he did it. And um, guy felt better. Guy felt better. Yeah. And that's how you know that chiropractic

care is real, real science. A guy just walked up to another guy and cranked on them and that's how it was born. Some dude in Iowa, everyone thinks it's like an Eastern thing. No, Iowa, Davenport, Iowa. Also what was invented in Iowa, the trampoline, the chiropractor and the trampoline. I like that. Yeah, that sounds like it. And the foam finger.

And the foam finger. Wow. I mean, the innovation in the Midwest is just stellar all right so you're looking for in a woman let's go the other end which one you swiping right on well first off I don't want crazy because that's just too much to deal with I deal with 280 crazy women every day twice a day and I'm about sick of that so I don't need to make it 281 Talking about I know what he's talking

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, he's funny folks. He's coming loaded up full of full of bullshit, too I like it Yeah Maybe another thing is someone that also has farm background because it's really hard to get, you know, your average city girl to not understand why we work 24 seven or, you know, someone that doesn't drink milk, you know, and it's just kind of a pussy. Man, you are a catch. I gotta tell you.

All right. So you're looking for a girl who drinks milk. What else? A girl who produces milk is my way. Well, we wait for that. What did you say? What were you about to say? You're a white. I'm also a bush light drinker. So she drinks more light. That'll work. Okay. That'll do. What else? What do you want? Let's talk looks. You've gotten all the other stuff out of the way. What do you want her to look like blonde hair, five foot two double D tits, giant ass. Wow. Dude, I think if you want all of this with your general attitude, you should find

a time machine. Go back to 1968. Let's go further. 1952. I think you'd be able to find what you're looking for. He just doesn't mean words. That would be kind of nice. I'm just an old soul lost in a new world or something like that. I don't know. I suppose.

I suppose. What is your actual town of residence? I'm going to try to hold this interview together because Miles has lost it. What's your actual town of residence? You got your computer thing up. We do have a computer. I'll give you something. I'll give you something to type in. Okay. Murder and Jackie's M E R the and sign and Jackie that'll bring you one mile away from my home Okay, I

Can't believe you're giving out your full location on this sucker, but that is oh, yeah Somebody good what somebody gonna do I guess that's true. I mean come steal one of your 200 I'm not gonna lie. I got an AR with a night vision scope on it You know what that that doesn't surprise me at all. But then on the list of stuff that's not shocking. Yeah. So you just you're about an hour north, though, like the top of Lake Winnebago there. Huh? Yeah.

So if you're like right zoomed in on that blue building, the supper club there, yeah. Zoom out just a little bit. You can see the dairy farm. Oh, okay. Oh yeah. Which is really cool that you guys should come visit because we got all automatic robots that milk our cows. We've had people from all across the world here. There's, we got a map with pins on it. This was going so well until he brought that up.

Well, no, I mean, you know, if you want a robot, that's what robots probably should be. I mean, honestly, probably, you know, it's tough to kick a robot. Yeah. So you got what do the robots look like that are milk in your cows? Well, you got to look up Lely Lely for robots. Let me see this thing. It's not just a machine is an actual humanoid robot or is it a machine? Let me see that.

I don't know how to describe it. It's a big thing with an arm on it that goes underneath the column. Yeah, that's fascinating. How much to one of those things run? You want to know what we just got for putting into a new one? Yeah. 100,000 a piece. You got 100,000 a piece. What do you mean? No, that's that's what we paid. Oh, you paid all the dollars each robot. Holy smokes. I mean, save some money on labor. After a few years, it pays for itself.

Pays for itself. So I mean, hey, listen, here's the good news. Yeah, you get these robots doing all your work. Now you got more time to get out there and find yourself a nice gal. Yeah, what are you doing for 24 hours if you're not milking the cow? Yeah, the robot's doing their whole thing. Seriously, had a robot. That's the seriously here.

That's the huge, like the biggest disconnect between state. Because you guys aren't farmers. The biggest disconnect is right there in itself. Well, you got robots to milk your cows. You don't need to see them. You don't spend as much time working on the cow physically, putting the milk on, you know, checking them over. You spend more time with your animals know, checking them over. You

spend more time with your animals. You watch your herd, you see them grow, you know, that way. Okay. I like that. That makes sense. So it's more quality time. Yeah. Yeah.

You know, you do a... Yeah, that's about what it is. So if you spend more quality time with your cows, do they produce more milk? Absolutely. The better care you take of your cows, do they produce more milk? Absolutely. The better care you take of your animals, the better care they will take of you. A happy cow, Charlie means more tippy cow for the rest of us. That is true. That is very true. I do wonder though, what do the cows feel for the, uh, about the robot? Like do, do the cows just,

that's an interesting, that's interesting too. So when they first start coming in, right after they have their first calf and they become a mother, they're a little bit timid to it. You know, they kind of kick the fuck out of it. Break some shit. I would tell you, but after, after two weeks time, they go through and on, on their own, we don't have to mess with them and they they do what they're supposed to go Wow, that's crazy. That is wild man I you know the kind of stuff we can sit down in a bar and talk about that's what we're doing right? Yeah, yeah, we are through the robots of the computer. You are with us at this, but we should know what's what's kind of funny

Charlie I saw an article was saying that like our generation is spending like 31 percent more time with their children than the dads previous. Really? They're spending more time with their kids. It doesn't just stop there. Now, the farmer dads are also spending 30 percent more time with the cows. Well, that's a win. Yeah. You know, I've given a lot of crap to robots. You know, they say the number one most important thing about being a dairy farmer

is just showing up for the cows, just showing up. Yeah, just being there. Yeah, listening to them. Listening to them. Yeah. Well, that if we mic'd you up when you were hanging out with the cows, would we hear some weird shit? Do you talk to the talk to them? A lot of what? What in the fuck are you even doing? So by quality time, you know, it's good to know. Yes, he's spending more time with them, but it's kind of like when our dads would spend quality time with us, Charlie and make us do manual labor and yell at us. So it's not as quality as we thought.

That said, I do appreciate that in retrospect. I feel like, I feel like more kids should do some home renovations. Um, all right. Well, listen, yeah, go ahead. Well, that's a lot of it too. Is, you know, living with my grandpa and that you get to see a lot of the appreciation of his eyes from, you know, starting in a stanchion barn when he was basically at sense because as long as he remembered to doing this now, you know, it's really cool. Yeah. Sorry. We got a note. Yeah. It's a great heartfelt note. It is a really nice to go. No. Yeah. Fred had to go say that last thing again, though. Sorry. We were saying goodbye to someone.

Oh yeah. Like I was saying with my grandpa, you know, cause he, this was his family farm just growing up, seeing it from when they were milking physically in the stanchion barn all the way to where we are today. Knowing my great grandma when she was alive yet, she got to see all of it too. And it's really cool hearing all the stories about it. Like the quality time with the animals is actually there. You know, someone has a,

someone like me has a greater appreciation for a glass of milk, or a glass of tippy cowdum what it is. Yeah, I 100% agree. No doubt. That's awesome. Well listen, we thank you for raising the cows that provide our tippy cow, and we thank your entire family, four generations.

Thank you for calling in. Listen. If you're ever in the Green Bay or Appleton area and you want to actually get a tour, shoot me a DM on Instagram. Yeah. What's your Instagram? At Kyle Banker 1219. Kyle Banker 1219. All right. Oh, and also if you're listening and you are a blonde woman who's five, two with double Ds and a big old

booty hit him up on his Instagram. Kyle banker one two one nine. Is that what you said? Yep. All right. So ladies, you can you can give them a follow right there at Kyle banker one two one nine is your birthday December 19th by chance. No, it is not. It is January 10th. Okay. Well, yeah, had me fooled. Well, we hope you find yourself that gal

and best of luck to you, okay? All right, well, thank you guys for the advice and all that. It was really nice talking to you. You betcha, my guy. really nice talking to you. You betcha my god We will talk to you soon Wanna lose my land the big old buck on our trail king Wow My heart and land, the big old buck on our trail came. Wow. We'll live to see another day.

If I ain't in that deer stand. If really breaking up all I really got. Can I still go fishing with your dad? Oh, that is so sweet, Miles. That is. hey, I take back what I said about your voice. All I need is a track of more of a karaoke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nice little bass. You can find it, though. Yeah, you can find it. That was really good.

That was sweet. That was touching. Well, that goes out to you, Kyle Banker. That was actually a song that me and Fillmore wrote that we never released. So really little debut here on the podcast. Oh, I like that. I did. You guys should release that, dude. We talked about it.

Well, you just released it. So I like that. I like we got new music out on this belly up podcast, folks. Yeah, that's great. Perfect. I like that. By the way, that guy, uh, I mean, we see the issue.

Also, we just glazed over the fact he said he's lived with a girl for three years and he's 20. So he moved in with her when he was 17. No, he said they dated for a year and then moved in together. He said they live three to 18 moved out to move in with a girl at 18. I mean, that's the guy that would do it. I guess I kind of did move into a dorm room with girls down the hall. It's kind of like, yeah, I just did. They moved to the farm. You're right. We left a little meat on that bone right there. All right. There was a lot going on. Oh man. We have to talk to Kyle. I want to talk to Kyle's father-in-law set him straight, you know Charlie's days are getting darker and colder. Oh

Yes, they are and when that happens you go can only think about the good old days You know what the good old days are summer summer and sunshine Yes, as it gets darker and colder and you maybe slip into a fog, brain fog of darkness and sadness. Yeah. You gotta find some sunshine in the winter time. Wow. This is so poetic, Miles. You're waxing poetic over here. And the only way to do that, Charlie,

is to tip on back a glass of Tippy Cow, as we like to do here on this podcast. Cheers to that. Guys, if you want a little summer, a little delicious, creamy treat as the days get shorter, the darkness grows longer. Make sure you pick up some tippy cow. Make it feel good all winter long. You're like a real thorough.

You know that? I don't know what that means. He wrote books. OK, yeah. A He wrote books. Okay. Yeah a Real Emerson. Yeah a real Emerson Lake and Palmer prepared more to Hemingway, but that'll be fine Have you okay? We're all busy getting ready for Thanksgiving, you, cleaning, maybe even a little bit too much time on them slippery sidewalks.

I just gotta tell you, if light throws you a curve ball and you end up going ass over teakettle, hurting yourself, do not worry, because Nikolay Law is here to handle all that insurance nonsense while you can just focus on healing and enjoying the festivities. And I tell you what, Miles,

that'll happen this time of year. There's a lot of- Yeah, maybe for non-athletes. Oh, okay. So for all you non-athletes out there getting injured, Miles wants to let you know that you're not as good at him in life. And no, no, no, just not as athletic. Just nice. Well, even athletes get hurt sometimes. I've seen

the NFL. I can talk too soon. You never know what could happen. It can happen to any of us. So if you get injured, call Nicolay. Well, Miles, we've got a live one, a patron of the bar, as I would say. Yeah. Bellion up to the bar. Tell everyone your name and what's on your mind. Oh, my name is Jason. I'm local guy from Bemidji here. And I know your guys's stories. I mean, I've seen you both and senior stuff.

And it's very Midwestern right yeah um I want to talk about church coffee church coffee now before I can't get this out of my head before we get into that has anyone ever told you look exactly like Zach Galifianakis well no I was gonna say the guy who plays Ron Swanson oh Nick Offerman, oh, Nick Offerman. I heard that one. Yeah, you're Nick Offerman to me. I get Zach Alfanaq is a lot.

Well, that was when I was fatter. Sam, dude, I used to get that, too. You guys, what was your workout routine? You know, what did you do? Mine's high stress and just drinking instead of eating. Oh, there you go. Yeah. The liquid, liquid lunch. Yeah. Mine would be high stress and the opus Zempik. So heavy beer to light beer. Oh, that's funny. Is that a video? Did you do that yet? No, we talked about it on a previous episode. I'm reusing jokes, Charlie. I like it. I like

it. Yeah. Oh, Sam, babies. Recycle them. It's all about that. That's all we do. So you want to talk church coffee. Church coffee. What kind of church are we talking? Because I grew up Catholic. So did Miles. We had wine in church. Didn't have a lot of coffee. So I grew up Presbyterian. Oh, the Presbytian. And what does that mean? Well, it's like a. S sideshow of a Lutheran, probably.

Lutheran sideshow. Presbyterian. Are there more rules or less rules? Is this Lutheran like? Because Lutheran is Catholic light. And so are you like? Probably even maybe lighter. Oh wow. So you're like a hot water. He's Catholic zero sugar is what he is.

Okay, alright. You like that? We did same same church, different people on that joke there. I like that. Yeah. All right. So yeah, this is what is this one of those churches that like the pastor where it's converse and like a like a quarter zip or like how that's non-denominating. How churchy are we getting? No, they've got the the robes. OK, all right.

It's not that I did. I know that late. It's not like off a highway somewhere, some huge warehouse that they, you know, built for Jesus somewhere. No, no, I don't think so. OK, you're going to a church is what you're saying. Right. OK, I grew up in a town of 400 people. There was the Lutheran Church and the Presbyterian Church.

We didn't have a Catholic Church in my hometown. So I married and I married a Catholic woman. Did you? Where'd you find her? At a bar. At a bar. That was a long thought process to get to. I would like to know the real story. Yeah. What's going on?

There is a long story, but let's make it easy and call it a bar. OK. OK. Kind of one of the long story. Yeah. What's the long story? Oh, boy. So she went to school in Mankato. I'm a Bemidji. Yeah. I get a move in with some guys and she was dating my roommate.

Oh, wow. She moves in for the summer job. Yeah. Hanging out here for a summer internship. They break up. We live together for about a year, year and a half. There's a party at our house. We have some beers and we're hanging out in a corner and I'm like, I like you. And she says, I like you. And then we made up and was, was it's roommate there now we've got no, well they, yeah, he'd moved out. Oh, he moved out. Okay. Okay. All right. We were roommates. John's a good man. He still lives down in New Almond. Did it, was he at the wedding?

He was not at the wedding. Okay, yeah. I figured that was maybe touchy, but yeah. So yeah, 17, 18 years later, whatever it is, we are married with two kids and two dogs. Dennis, who you met earlier. That was your dog? Yeah, that's mine. I didn't even get to pet him. I petted him.

She had a doctor appointment, so I had to run to the resort she works at. Hun dog. Well, we'll try it. OK. But he's mostly cuddling and petting and. Yeah. Laptop emotional support. Yes. Right. Right. OK. So church coffee. Yeah. Let's get to the point of this church coffee. And I don't have very much experience with Catholic church

or Catholic church coffee. But when I went to church growing up and when I've gone lately, you go downstairs after church and you have coffee and usually the gals have made some bars or they've made some cookies or something and you have coffee. But you can see through the coffee. Like I can see the bottom of the cup. And I don't know how you guys like your coffee, but that is not how I like mine. Well, I'm wondering if this is this thing. I mean, I've been to multiple churches and I've seen this and I've experienced.

I think what you're experiencing is the results of a low economy right now. It's like even churches are not they uh, they're, they're getting affected as well. It's like the dra great Jack Kennedy once said, ask not what the church can do for your coffee. Ask what you can do for the church coffee. How much were you putting in the little basket as it went around? Exactly. No, how much, how much do you donate?

Yeah, seriously. Are you tithing or no? Oh, well, I put some in the offering cup during the service, a little obviously less for the coffee downstairs. And good point. Yeah. Probably need to put more in. It's an offering cup. Well, that's where the church is going wrong right there. You got to have a basket. Catholic churches have like three people on payroll just to ask people for money. And all you guys got is a little cup. You need to up the game. You gotta get a pole.

Go ahead and get an old cane pole and then put a basket at the end of that thing. Get it out there in the aisles and look at people as they're putting in, you know, and tell them you want to go to purgatory, put a $20 bill in. Find the judgiest person in the whole congregation and put them on the duty of collecting the money.

Yeah. I want some good Colombian coffee. Well, if you want a pot of coffee, Colombian, don't just grow on trees. That comes from money. So I think what's the name of the church? Saint who now that I grew up going to? Yeah. First Presbyterian Church of Ashby.

Oh, first Presbyterian. Are you guys the ones with the pointy things on the top of your church? No, we don't have any point. You just have a normal cross up there. I mean, heck, we didn't even have that. Oh, you didn't? Well, she's the Catholic zero sugar. Yeah, I guess that's they can't even afford good coffee.

They also probably don't want you guys getting all hopped up on the caffeine and spending out like an extra hour down there chit chatting, you know. And I think part of it, too, is it's you know, you sit down there and it's a lot of older women. Let's be honest. I think those women just that's their drink of choice. Yeah. Yeah.

Get a little weaker is what you're saying, because they're going to drink it all day. That's true. Where I'm switching to you. You want not a church and go into the watch a football game and switch into beer. Yeah, that's their their full day thing. I mean, they're not that'd be like you ordering your first beer and get one of those like IPA is 28% alcohol. You know, they have that when I'm only having one. But I write, that's the same thing.

Same deal here. You know, that's why I drink light beer, because you can drink all of it all day. Well, yep. And that's what they're doing with their coffee. So I think we solved it right there. And I think we all learned a lesson today. Main lesson. Give some money to church.

Give your church some money. So we can have good coffee. But you have to earmark it. This is for caffeine. Or booze if you wanna get wild. The Catholics, they throw those fundraisers and you can get lit up like a Christmas bush. They don't skimp on that.

Well, can you sneak in a little shot of the tippy cow? You know, I B-Y-O-B for the J.C., baby. You know, I mean, you didn't hear that here, but. Yeah, I did not promote drinking at church, that's for sure. Well, I am Catholic, that's part of the deal. So, yeah. Well, yeah, well, thank you for bellying up with us. I hope that we, you know, I think we showed some solution, but I get your point. Yeah, I get your

point. Stronger coffee at the church. Bring it up with the gals. Next time that collection basket comes through, put in a 20 stapled to a piece of paper that says stronger coffee, and then you're good to go. All right. I'll see what happens. We know anything about churches, Charlie. Bribing goes a long way.

Oh, it sure does. Sure does. Church and everywhere else. Yeah. It's true. Yup. That's how it's. Sorry, it's not bribing, it's lobbying, Charlie.

Yeah, it's lobbying. Lobby for stronger coffee. Lobbying, that's it. Yeah, bribing is probably a bad word with church. Yeah, it's lobbying. Lobby for stronger coffee. Lobbying, that's it. Yeah, bribing is probably a bad word with church. Yeah, it is. Yeah, there's no thou shall not lobby rule. Thou shall not bribe? That's not a Ten Commandment.

Pretty much. Yeah. Steal. You can't steal unless it's stealing people's votes with your money. Then it's called a super pack. So anyways, yeah. Well, thank you for coming on. I appreciate you having me on and I appreciate you guys coming to Bimiji.

Hell yeah. Good time. Keep that beard up. That's a good beard. All right. Yeah, thank you. Don't shave that sucker. My children have never seen me without one.

Well, hopefully they never do. My father, I never, my mom never even saw him without facial hair and my grandma before she died Want him to shave it and he did it and it was a nightmare So don't do it unless you want to scare your children. No, I did shave it for oh my god I don't want to call my chins Charlie the reason why you keep a long beard when you're a big guy is you can hide all the chins That's smart smart women should get beards, you know I'm just saying cuz women are like hide all their chins

No, but I'm saying some some women are like shoot the camera up here. They talk about the Multi-room chins give them beards like it's not fair only guys get beards. Yeah, I don't know if. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. with double D's and huge ass. So you're doing alright. Oh, yeah Yeah, we've set the bar very high here on the bellied up podcast. Well, thanks for coming on man Yeah, watch for deer miles that about does are here for Bellied up podcast. Yes, and guys remember to go check out the, you bet. Our, oh, you bet you.com.

The bellyed up merchandise is on there. Charlie's got that. I got the road on for ditch chicken shirts. We got other colors in the ditch chickens. Check it out. Thanks for tuning in today. Charlie was fired up all podcasts. Fired up.

Don't forget to tip your bartenders. See you in the next one. Love you guys. Love you back.