Bellied Up - The Weirdest Thing About the Midwest W/ Aaron Weber #151

Episode Date: May 15, 2025

We're at The Red Door Saloon in Nashville, TN. Comedian Aaron Weber joins the pod to talk about his weirdest interaction in the Midwest and what it was like growing up in Alabama. (24:22) Our first caller wants to run for governor of Oklahoma, so we give him some political pointers on how he can win. (46:42) Then, a frightened 11-year-old leaves us a voicemail about his complicated dating situation.Leave us a voicemail: 218-303-5095Aaron Weber's Special

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Bellied Up podcast. I'm here with Miles, the you betcha guy and special guest comedian, Aaron Weber. Aaron, how you doing? I'm great. Thank you guys for having me, man. I'm excited. I've been a fan of your guys' stuff for a while. This is cool to be sitting with you all. Nice, man. I'm a fan of your stuff, too. Are you revealing where we are right now?

Oh, yeah. Let's do it. We're at the Red Door. The Red door saloon. Red. The Reddor Saloon. I knew there was another word. The Reddor Saloon, Nashville. This is an important bar for the the national comedy community. This is kind of the spot that people go to. Oh, it is. Yeah, because there's a big smoking patio.

After after shows, Anees is down the street. Come over here. Spent many nights here. I also used to work at Music Road right around the corner, about two blocks from here. And after work, we'd walk over and have a beer here. And, you know, the company collapsed around us. So we spent many a night sitting at this bar talking about, you know, what we're going to do for work. Commiserating. Yeah.

What was that company? It was a marketing company that we found out years later was never legally registered as a company. Oh, yeah. What was that company? It was a marketing company that we found out years later was never legally registered as a company. Oh, wow. There's a lot of, there are some illegal activities potentially. Whoa. Do you think it was a front? If it was a front, it wasn't a successful one. Yeah. That's the whole point is it's got to be registered. A front stays afloat. Yeah, right. Right. Well, I'm sorry that didn't work out. I quit that and I've been doing comedy.

So what was it? What was like when you guys started realizing something? What was going on? What was the moment when we started getting paid through Venmo? It's usually not a good sign. And it's just like, it's like, this is one third of your paycheck. The last two thirds are coming later. I O use that kind of stuff. Give cards, you know, the whole thing supporting it is just this guy trying to scam people on Facebook. Did

you go to Walmart, get 15 $50 gift card. He shows up to a bank with a napkin and tries to deposit the I OOU and they're like, sure, this isn't gonna work. You know what the weird thing is? I, I still, I kind of like the guy that did it to us. Well, that's the whole thing with these guys. They're very charismatic. Yeah. I'm not as mad at him as I should be, I guess. You still buddies? No, I haven't. He, he went MIA. We haven't seen him.

Oh, heard from him in a while. He owes all of his money. Oh, wow. He's really. Yeah, he's out there with a new name, a new family and a new town. But if he walked in here today, I'd shake his hand and say, how are you doing? How's your family? No, that's not as mad at him as I should be. Yeah. Yeah. A tax guy.

Tell me, he said, I explained the whole situation to him and he goes, hey, this guy is not your friend. And I was like, yeah, but he's kind of, he's a good dude outside of that. So I don't know. I hope he's doing well. Well, is, is getting out of that company, is, is that what like, were you doing comedy at that point too? Well, that was what actually gave me the confidence to quit my job because I wasn't getting paid

for a while there at the end. So you know the thinking is can I survive on just comedy and then I kind of looked up and I was like oh I've been doing that for a while because this job hasn't paid me so I might as well quit and go full-time. That was 2019. Nice. So yeah I've been doing full-time since then. That's awesome and you are from here originally? I moved here in high school. I'm from Alabama originally. Okay. You guys spend a lot of time in the south of the two of you? Not really. I don't. Charlie probably has been there a little more than I have. I've been there doing some shows. I was in Alabama. I was in Birmingham.

Was it as much of a culture shock as you thought it would be or do you think people are pretty much the same? I think people are the same everywhere, but there are distinct differences in the South. I lived in South Carolina for a year and a half and they would say, I appreciate you. Appreciate it all the time. As opposed to I appreciate it. That's what we say up there because to say we appreciate you, that's a different level of emotional intimacy. And we're not ready for that. I mean, that's a lot of commitment.

We appreciate the task you are doing for us. Or we will say it politely, but we do not. We cannot for any reason say we say if I appreciate you for marriage, you know. That was actually my vows. So you never say you appreciate the person. Let's exchange vows. And then I went, appreciate you. And she said, I appreciate you.

And he said, you may kiss the bride. That's how it went. That was the scariest moment of my life. It was a lot of commitment. There is a, there is a lot of the differences, obviously, you know, there's a whole bless your heart thing that's that's kind of been done. And and but what else? You know, you've been around to you've been in the Midwest.

What do you find that's weird up there that you may not do down here in southern places? Well, the first thing that strikes you is the hearing the accents in the wild is crazy when you've never been there and like you've only seen it in movies and stuff. You're telling me. And then like you see a guy at a gas station and you're like, oh, my God, you really talk like it's like that. Eminem's commercial where the Eminem meets Santa like you do exist. They do exist and they both faint at the same time.

I did. I have a big bit about this, but it was the first show I ever did in Wisconsin. It was in a town called Minong, Wisconsin. Have you heard of Minong? Top left hand. See, I love that you do that. People don't like that. Y'all do the hand to Michigan likes to claim it. Michigan can get over it.

The hand would be top left of your pinky. I mean, borderline way up there. Yeah. By past still water yet. Still potentially. Dude, I just I just drove. I haven't looked at a map in a while, but population 528. Wow. Small. We did a show at the Minong City Hall. Five percent of the town was at the show.

But as they were bringing me on stage, they say, hey, by the way, just just don't do any jokes about beef jerky. And I was like, like, that's my whole set. That's my whole set. I go, why did you think I was going to talk about beef jerky? You know, forget why I'm not allowed to. Why did you think this would come up? So I was just so blown away by it.

It's such a bad set. I was thinking, like, why can't I talk about beef jerky? And I get off stage and I finally I asked the woman and she goes, well, this is the the headquarters of Jack Link's beef jerky is in Wisconsin, the whole town works at the factory. Wow. I was saying, Jack Link could have been at the show. I don't know. Mr. Link was there. Good.

Yeah. So they all and then we got like a Jack Link's like gift bag on the way out. But it was such a it really messed with my head. I was like, why can't I talk about beef jerky? But the reason I bring that show up is because that was my first time in Wisconsin. And I remember a woman in the back, anytime somebody would start a joke, she would go, uh-oh, and I lost it, dude.

I've never heard a human being make that noise in real life. Also, the stuff we're saying is not that crazy. It was wild. The terrible part is I know exactly what you're talking about. I've heard it that noise. Yeah, we do that. Don't we?

It's almost like that aunt at the family thing when like the the younger cousin or whatever is about to say a story like almost like they're humoring you a little bit. You know, like you're just taking the piss out of anything. I'm going to say right now. Exactly. So it was a bad show, though, you said. It was as good as it could be for a town of five hundred in the city hall. And you said 20, you said 5% of 500.

I haven't done the math exactly, but there may be 30 people. Okay. That's pretty good. I think that's what I was going to say. But there's a lot of other stuff going on in my long that night, probably. Yeah. I mean, they had the Jack links party, the raffle, meat raffle. You know what I remember else about that, that night I was with dusty sleigh. I was opening for dustyy Slay there. And the next morning we went to some mom and pop restaurant. Dusty was like, I'm gonna get a breakfast sandwich to go and we'll hit the road. Right. So we walk in. It's like a 12 year old

working the cash. He's the cashier. Yeah. No adults in the building. It's just a 12 year old kid. He's also the mayor. So Dusty goes, can I get an egg sandwich and please make sure it's not runny? I'm going to try to eat this in the car. So just like a not runny egg sandwich. And the kid goes, yeah, my dad's working in the kitchen. We're like, OK, great. It's about 20 minutes later. The dad comes out

and he hands dusty and egg sandwich at dusty opens up. It's the most running. I mean, it's spilling all over him and the dad who just cooked the sandwich goes, yeah, it's pretty runny, huh? And I was like, aren't you the guy who made it? He's like, yeah. And then we left. And that's all I remember about that place. So he was trying to, he was trying to big dig in with a running egg or the kid would just thought like, make it as runny as possible. Something got lost in translation there. I mean, it was a game of telephone by the time it went five yards back to the kitchen, something went wrong, but that was my first trip to Wisconsin. Things have gotten better since

I'm glad. Yeah. I'm going to Milwaukee and places like that. Good, trip to Wisconsin. Things have gotten better since. I'm glad. Yeah, I'm going to Milwaukee and places like that. Good, good, good. Yeah, I mean, not that there's anything wrong with my long. I'd love to go back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you?

Maybe I can do the funeral home next time. Was it a corporate gig or was it? Yeah, it was a funny business gig. One of those. Oh, one of those like systems there where they have a thing and send people. So it was a, it was part of a long run of like 40 different shows and ran. We did egg Harbor, Wisconsin. Oh yeah. We were just talking to a dusty yesterday. Didn't he bring up egg Harvard? I think he did. Yeah. Yeah. He wasn't

a fan of egg. It might've been the least fun I? I think he did. Yeah. Yeah. He wasn't a fan of Egg Harbor. Might have been the least fun I've ever seen him have on stage. Yeah, he was fun to watch. Is that the place he said that he got out of there before everyone else got out of there? He got off stage and he goes, meet me at the car. We're going right now. I watched Dusty. He got to the part of his set where he normally would do his merch pitch.

And I watched him. He picked up his t-shirt and he looked at it and he goes, nah. Oh, that was great. That's awesome. So did he, so you guys just walk out the door, grab the rest of the merch and then I had for it. Cause you were staying like a ways away, weren't you? We were, it was at a resort where they didn't get us a room. So I don't even think we had a hotel that night. So we had to drive like another four hours after that show. I'm not

hanging around here for this crowd that hated me. Let's just hit. Yeah. He said, you know what? Sunk costs, leave the merch. I don't even feel like boxing it up. It'll end up going to the goodwill. It's fine. It's a write off at this point. That's cool. So you got any dates coming up in Milwaukee, by the way? I am going to be in Milwaukee, November 13th on my birthday. No, happy birthday to you. Thank you. It's the most Midwest thing you've ever fucking done. You wish someone a happy birthday. Seven months. Yeah.

Well, in case I miss it. I appreciate that. I don't want you to go without a happy birthday on your birthday. I might as well just do it right now. You ever not tell people your birthday and just see how many people actually know it? Yeah, I mean, I don't. You don't have it on your Facebook or anything like that. I probably do. Yeah.

But I haven't logged in to my Facebook in a long time. Like my personal one. God, you probably have so many birthday messages on there. Just happy birthday exclamation point. But I don't know if you're like me. If you take it off of there, you'll be shocked how few people know when your birthday is. I got a text from my mom and my wife said, happy birthday. That was it.

Really? Which I kind of like. I'm not a huge birthday guy. It makes me uncomfortable. I'm fine with that. I'm with you because how much of your birthday do you want to spend replying to texts? It's like you got to go to work. Yeah. Every, every few hours, people you barely know. That's why you just take the birthday off. And then it's only people you actually love will reach out to you. Yeah. And every few hours, people you barely know. That's why you just take the birthday off. And then it's only people you actually love will reach out to you. Yeah, that's the way I do it.

There's also the people who will text you twice a year. Once on Thanksgiving, once on Christmas. Happy Thanksgiving exclamation point or Merry Christmas. That's it. Like I get like two people in my life will do that twice a year. Those are usually people that still have like a signature at the end of the text. You see those probably a realtor. Yeah, exactly. My dentist will text me Thanksgiving.

It is nice that Dennis do that though. It is. Yeah. You got to go in for a checkup. You got to get reminded. But don't you think this will sound bad? Don't you think birthdays are for women? Yeah, they're definitely. OK. You got to get reminded, but don't you think this will sound bad. Don't you think birthdays are for women? Yeah, they're definitely okay.

They're for moms specifically because they should be the only ones being wished a happy birthday. They did all the birthday, you know, you just went on a little slip and slide, you know, birthdays are a great way for women to keep score, right? Who put up an Instagram story wishing me a happy birthday? You know, who reached out, wanted to go for brunch, you know, all that stuff. Then they can keep the mental checklist in their head of who's keeping up with them.

You gotta do a story, tag them, and then you gotta share all of them. Yeah, it's a whole performative thing now. Correct. When did that start? Like, when did we start doing, I see people do a story of their friend with like five different pictures Like how do you find those in your phone first of all? And then second of all you're going through the effort to make it a whole Instagram story collage

Then you gotta think of all the friends you don't do it for exactly, but I think that's what the gift is is the effort Oh Really? It's such a nice gesture. The guy went out of my way to type out this meaningless thing. Happy birthday. It is also very funny, like the caption will say, be like the strongest woman I know. And then the next friend has a birthday and they're like the strong and it's like the girl is just like a teacher at a middle school.

Yeah. Just like never has any trials or tribulations in their life. Go to example of a weak woman. I would say that middle school teacher. No, you clearly haven't been to a middle school, dude. It's a war zone in there. War zone. These kids are meant that she just doesn't have anything bad really going on in her life.

The entire school situation. It's like the woman posts that then she's just a nurse at a NICU. Yeah, I'm going to catch some flack there. That's fine. That's all right. That's fine. It's fine. I get what you're saying.

I get what you're saying. They're right in like- But then you go, Oh, she's just a stay at home mom. And then you have all the people coming at you. Like, that's a job. You're saying they're writing about her like she was in Fallujah or something. Like she fought in a war. Yeah. Yeah. I get that. Yeah. It was really progressive. What you said after further review after further review, mild sexist stance has been overturned much more pro military than anti-woman. So yeah, I think it's just people aren't thinking about

marketing guy. Weren't you? I can spend something around. I can spend things. Oh man. That's good. So what else is going on? Not a whole lot, man. I had a, had a baby, got a six month old baby and that's awesome. It's fun. The in-laws are here helping out. In-laws are great. My mom will come spend a week now. They're here for a week. Just, you know, you just want to put that you just want to put the kid somewhere.

That's the value of it. I'm not following. What do you mean? Because I want to do stuff. And you're like, I love the, I love my child, but I just want to put her somewhere for a minute. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, a hundred percent. Yeah. That was not great out. I just want to stick her in a corner somewhere. I just want to leave her in the car when I go in places. But I'll crack a window.

Miles is trying to one up his phrase before, you know, just, just, just throw a bunch of mud on this interview. So none of it'll stick. Yeah. Good tactic. But my wife and I like last night, my wife and I were both out at the same time. That just hasn't happened in forever. It's had to be one or the other would. Yeah. Yeah. I had a, I got a nine and almost 10 month old. So I'm, I'm in the same stage that you're in. So yeah, I get it. Yeah, it's like we there's a sweet spot, though, where it's like right away. Yes, they like can't do anything, but you can just like lay them there and they don't move.

So you can't go do other stuff. Yeah. Where as soon as they start crawling around, you're like, you're constantly thinking about what they're doing. Even early on, they can just fall asleep on your chest or whatever. Now she can't do, I gotta do stuff with her. I got a jingle chain or something. Were you a skin to skin contact dad? Yeah. To the point where it made people uncomfortable. I'm just kidding. The doctor was like, Aaron, you don't have to be shirtless during the C-section. I walked in the room like Bert Kreischer. They're like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Yo, they emphasize skin to skin.

Well, so I was telling my dad about this and he's a, you know, he's a boomer. So there was, that didn't exist back then. I don't even know it myself. I got nothing. Yeah. So basically I was like, yeah, dad, like apparently they do skin to skin contact, whatever. And he's like, kind of like, that's just dumb. Yeah.

That doesn't make any sense. So they've learned it's pretty recent, but they've learned there's all these benefits to literally just putting the baby skin against your skin, not with the shirt in between or anything, but skin to skin contact. It's like a connection between and all of that. So immediately after birth, they're like, put that baby on the mother skin and just like. So the first thing they do when they come out is just skin to skin. Wow. There's like

immediate actual health benefits to it. Yeah, it's a great thing. Um, and so I explained this to my dad and I was like, dad, I didn't get it. Like, should we try it now? We pop that top off. We got a lot of catching up and that made him pretty uncomfortable. So well, isn't it wild just raising a kid now? Like the differences between how, how you were raised, we're probably around the same age where you're 30s 32. Yeah. Yeah. We're the same age. So like I was raised, I slept on my stomach in the crib. They threw all kinds of crap in there, stuffed animals. I had a blanket on it.

And now they're like absolutely nothing in the crib. And the baby has to be on its back. Because it's a suffocation situation. Yeah, because kids kept dying. So they're like, all right, we got to switch something up. Yeah. So now you got to sleep on your back. But just the fact that I as a child, I slept on my stomach. That's how my mom would just lay down on them. We're survivors. You know, we made it through with a lucky one. That's why I'm as strong, I slept on my stomach. That's how my mom would just lay down.

We're survivors. You know, we made it through with a lucky one. That's why I'm as strong as I am now, I think. Yeah, I had a teddy bear in the crib with. Hey, you're the strongest guy. I think I'm going to put down my Instagram story. I'm just a teacher. That is true.

You know, as far as my mom, my mom's a middle school teacher. She's retired now and she would jump around different grade levels. But she taught me algebra one in middle school. My dad was the high school principal. My mom was my middle school math teacher. I'm one of four kids. There was a year where all six of us got ready for school. We all got in the car and went to the same place. And then we all went home after.

Isn't that crazy? It's only a year because at a certain point, you know, kids were in high school or whatever. But yeah, too. So a lot of teachers in my family and I love I love trash. So that was about the worst thing I could say. No, I loved it. I get it. My mother didn't work hard. Just kidding. Worked very hard. What do you think parenting is going to be like in like 20 more years? You know, if that if this is how far we've come from

like, well, luckily we'll be kind of done with it by that. I'll just be starting probably. So I'll let you guys know, you know? Yeah, they'll probably make you have to sleep. They have to suspend the baby by its ankles. Yeah. And that's how it sleeps. Vampire style. Yeah. To prevent scoliosis or something. There'll be a study that comes out.

You ever do one of those where you hang those machines, where you hang from your feet? I haven't, but I know what you're talking about. Doesn't it look awesome? It does. Yeah. Have you? I haven't, but I know what you're talking about. Doesn't it look awesome? It does. Yeah. Have you done it? No, but I want to so bad, but there's a weight limit on a lot of the second podcast in a row or weight limits give up.

Because I used to be 60 pounds heavier than now. So, yeah, I was last podcast. It said Charlie did that. He doesn't have the struggle of having to look at weight limits. There's stuff you can't do. Correct. You couldn't have gone skydiving. And we could talk about skydiving. You'd have to pay a hundred bucks extra. That's crazy. For the extra bearish.

Yeah. It's like buying a five XL shirt. It costs twice as much. You know, you were five. Oh, my God. Five. How do you not fix things at four? And I've been up to a four. I'm not trying to knock people that are. The one thing about being overweight is like, um,

you're on an elevator and like it makes a weird noise and then everyone's looking at you, you know? Yeah. Like you were the guy who brought it over the limit. They start doing the math and it says a 3,500 pound weight capacity. I mean, I'm not the only guy to blame here. So you 10% of that farts too. You get blamed. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. And it is you most of the time. I get it. Yeah. Well, what do you think miles? So we take some collars.

Charlie, what's up miles? I don't know about you, Well, what do you think, Miles? So we take some callers. Let's do it. Charlie, what's up, Miles? I don't know about you, but you I graduated high school. Oh, no, I did that. OK, OK. Yeah, I didn't know. You had a graduation party. Yeah, actually, I did. It was really nice. My band played. You had a band. Yeah, I had a band. Pretty good. Called Your Project.

Y.O.R. R E Music of Your. OK, yeah. Yeah, that means yesterday like music. We were a cover band, but mostly Grateful Dead covers. That's a few old folk tunes. Nice. Yeah. I don't know about your dad, but my dad had a lot of work to do to get ready for that grad party. I don't know if my dad did a whole lot. He had to clean the garage.

He had to put a tarp up in the garage to hide all of our shit so he could put the tables in the garage. Oh, yeah. Now that you mention it. Yeah. And it's a stressful time for parents. So if you're a parent out there preparing for a graduation party and you get all frazzled and you're worried about people coming over and you happen to end up in a car accident because you're distracted. Oh, the frazzled accident. Yeah. The frazzled

accident. The frazzled accident. Yeah. If you end up in a frazzled accident, you got to call Nicolet Law. They're going to help you out. They're going to make sure that the insurance companies are staying in line and then you can enjoy the graduation party with the peace of mind that you called Nikolai. I'd like to give a peace of mind to you Miles but I won't I'll call Nikolai instead. Yeah. I'll let the insurance companies settle this one actually no I'll let him settle it with the insurance companies. So guys give Nikolai a call. Hello Hello. Is this James? That's right. Jane. Not much. You got the belly to podcast here with Charlie and special guest comedian, Aaron Weber on the line as well.

How's it going, man? Oh hell yeah. It's going great. So a word on the street is you want to run for a little governorship, huh? That's right. You guys are talking to the future governor of Oklahoma. I love it. Spoken like a true politician. I can't wait to tell you guys a whole bunch of promises and then not follow through on any of them.

You have step one in the bag. I like where this is going. I can hear the bolo tie on you now. Yeah, well, hey, actually, that's funny. I don't know how to tie a tie, so I only wear bolo ties. I know. I can hear it. Well, in your ad campaigns, make sure you don't wear a tie

and have your sleeves rolled up so people know you get to work. Just below the elbow. That's right. That's right. So can I ask you, James, what's the elevator pitch? Let's say I'm a voter in Oklahoma. I'm literally on an elevator with you. You've got 10 seconds to tell me what your campaign's about.

What are we saying? Hey man, you know that pothole in the road that you hit on the way here that probably throughout your alignment? Yeah. Let's get that puppy fixed. Well, who's going to pay for it? probably throughout your alignment. Yeah. Let's get that puppy fixed. Who's going to pay for it? You are good, sir.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Have a good day. See you at the polls. I respect the honesty.

I also love the idea that the governor is handling potholes. Yeah. I mean, yeah, dude. I'm a man of the people. That's right. We're going to dig in and handle these things at a local level. Let's get the governor in. I like that he's kind of just running his campaign off of mild inconveniences that he has personally. Right. Yeah. That's actually

a genius. You get out there, start fixing those potholes right now and make that like your campaign thing. Like, what's your name again? James. James. James, what's your last name? Davini. James Davini. Wow. That's going to be an uphill battle in Oklahoma with a name like that.

I think. Yeah, a lot of letters. You're going to have to distance yourself from your Italian roots. I think. Yeah, yeah yeah for sure. You know right now the current governor's only got five letters in his last letter. Easy to spell. We don't have the best education system over here right now.

Well that's one of the things they're going to work on right? Now let me ask you this James, I think a lot of people are frustrated with the state of American politics right now. People say it's too negative right? We talk down to each other, we don't try to find common ground. Is that the kind of campaign you're going to run? Are you going to run a lot of negative ads, negative messages against your opponents? No, I'm not that kind of guy. You know, I don't really like to be hateful.

I'm actually very polite most of the time, unless I don't like somebody. But but then it's not, you know, I'm not rude. I kind of I kind of, you know, know how to do that politician thing where, where maybe you're telling somebody to go to hell, but they kind of think they're going to enjoy this trip. That was actually quite nice this time of year. Prepared to Oklahoma. Yeah.

Oh, that's awesome, man. I love this. Now, are you worried about, I think a lot of good people are afraid to get into politics because they know all of a sudden people are digging through your closet, they're trying to find skeletons, right? Ooh, yeah.

Have you prepared yourself for this kind of vicious attack from other politicians? Well, now this is actually a very real concern I have because, and I'll tell you, my wife is actually more concerned about it than I am because she is not an American citizen. She's from Germany and she could be a German spy. I don't know.

Wow. Wow. I don't think she's a spy, but this is smart. Get ahead of it. Yeah. I would try to firm up a stance on this before things get rolling. Yeah. As a marketing guy, how would you firm this up? I would go decide definitively whether your wife is a German spy. That's probably step number one, but she says she's not a spy, but that's exactly what a spy would say. That is true. This could be part of a master plan. I don't know. Well, they say keep your enemies close or your friends closer. Your enemies closer. I would maybe not use the term master plan,

but your German wife, no, no, I don't. I don't think she's a spy. I don't. That's good. You know, I don't know what the press is going to say. Right. Especially after this phone call, they might be like, you know, James DeVittie is the wife of the German spy. Always driving around in a Volkswagen. We know what that means. So he gives the weirdest high fives. So, so James, what, what aside for the potholes, what's another element to your campaign platform here? Well, yeah. So, so like I said, you know, I'm a, well, I said it in my voice now, so I'm a road builder. So roads are very, very important to me.

That's a definitely a firm stance on the old campaign. I work in the asphalt business, so we've got a lot of guys that are in shape and doing things, not necessarily healthy, but in shape. To have us in shape. To have us in a shape. Yeah, yeah.

Well, it's so hot out there, you kinda get unfatted real quick whenever you're on a nap. Right, right. So we're going to, you know, we're going to make the state a little healthier. Oh, wow. A lot of people driving around. Yeah. Yeah. We got a mohawk. We're pretty far behind on that. You know, there's a lot of people that that drive trucks, but it's not because

they need a truck necessarily to work. It's just that that's the only thing that won't bottom out. And that's causing all the potholes right there. That's right. Yeah. So you're just an asphalt guy that's got a that wants to make change around here. It's like you're not actually in politics. You you work on the on the tarmac. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're working on the, on the hot stuff. Um, you know, I am a, I'll say, I mean, I'm involved on some levels, uh, politically. Uh, you know, I do, uh, um, kind of, uh, go to some of those events and stuff where those people are around and

that's kind of beating stuff. So well connected. Yeah. And as a fault man with a dream, he's like, I had to go to city council meeting once to pay my to fight my parking ticket. I'm involved in politics. Yeah. No, no, actually I went to lunch with a congressman congressman the other day. Wow. So it was it was interesting. Yeah. So you're building alliances already. Let me ask you this. Have you thought about what's your team going to look like? Do you have a transition team in place?

Have you already talked to other friends, other asphalt guys, maybe bring in, you know, a concrete mixture to run, you know, the economy, things like that. The cabinet, what's your cabinet going to look like? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, it might be tough to get a concrete guy in there. Concrete guys and asphalt guys don't always get along. You know, a cabinet guy though, finished carpenter. That could be good. So for my cabinet, I just have cabinet guys. I got an Amish guy to do all the woodwork. Well, it's funny to say that one of my friends owns a cabinet company. There you go. Look at

that. So, and she's Asian. So it's an Asian woman who runs a cabinet company. And I already told her, you're my DEI pick. OK, there you go. There you go. I love it. Good. So, yeah, I mean, what what? Like aside for the roads, though, I'm just trying to suss out a few more things that's going wrong with Oklahoma right now in your mind.

Yeah, well, you know, as I mentioned, education is not exactly on par, you know, not not necessarily that teachers are doing a bad job. Look at them walking the line already. Yeah, the teachers union has been doing good work, but blame it on the kids. They can't vote. You know, well, it's not the teachers are doing a bad job. It's just, uh, they're basically paid the wages of an indentured servant.

Right. So, uh, you know, you know, maybe we, maybe we got to, maybe we got to help them out. Maybe, um, raise that pay a little bit, maybe attract a little better talent in some areas. Right. Right. So cut the pay of the firefighters and the policeman, give it to the teachers. I like that. I don't know. Where does Oklahoma rank? Where does Oklahoma rank in education? You know, I, I grew, I'm from Alabama. We're proudly, we hover around 49 50.

Well, I think you and I are fighting for that same spot. Oh, how about that? All right, little competition there. A little toilet bowl between the two of us. But this sounds like this whole campaign is rooted in a deep and abiding love of your home state, Oklahoma. Talk a little bit about, just tell me the love story that you have for the state of Oklahoma and get me

excited about it. Yeah. So I'm born and raised in Oklahoma and it's a great place. You know, it really is. You know, it's a, it's a well-kept secret that's kind of been getting out lately. I have heard that. Yeah. I have heard, I have heard, I heard whispers of that. It's been some murmurs on, on our slash Oklahoma.

Yeah. So all the kids, you know, everybody left Oklahoma during the dust bowl and the twenties and with California. Right. And now I think due to a current political States there, they're all, they're all moving back. Yeah. That's your whole campaign. Come on home. Come home. Come home. Yes. Come home. Come home. Trying to get the Beverly hillbillies back, you know, come on back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So they're all, they're all coming back and you know, it's it's been a little interesting there But yeah, it's a great place, you know, it's you can actually afford to live here, which is awesome You know buy some houses and that kind of stuff and and live a decent life without having to make a dumb amount of money

So affordable. I love that rate and you don't have the arrogance that a Dallas or a Houston or an Austin has, right? Oh, absolutely not, no. Yeah, I respect that. You guys got a big feud with Texas though, don't you? Yeah, yeah, it's, you know, I don't know that Texas has a feud with Oklahoma so much as Oklahoma has a feud with Texas. You know, people from Oklahoma really hate Texas and people from Texas. I don't even think, you know, that there are any other states. Yeah, that's for sure.

I love. Well, I'm getting fired up about this campaign, man. And I know, you know, you've never heard of me. I'm just a lowly comedian out here in National Tennessee. But if you if you if you need someone to get a super PAC started, anything like that, I'm happy to chip in and serve your campaign in any way that I can. This has been great.

Thank you. See, I already have an offer to send in money from out of state. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's touch base. I'll send you my Venmo. The whole campaign is financed through Cash App. This is not good. Yeah. Cash App and failed crypto. Yeah. But you know, that's what we need is some comedians on the campaign.

Because I think all these politicians are taking things too serious. I mean, you know, Trump's got Kid Rock. I think that's a good choice politically. I think kid rock, the great, a great, a great, um, political, uh, uh, influencer leader. Yeah. Our Lord and savior, Bobby, uh, kid rock. So, uh, you know, we need some comedians on our side. Uh, I think it's,'s, you know, I mean, I don't know, kid rocks. All right. But but I'd rather make people laugh. I think actually it's kind of onto something because I do feel like comedians see the world clear, clearer than everyone else.

Yeah, because you're trying to make fun of everything. So then you look at everything, how it should be looked at. Yeah, yeah. I'm on board. I like that you don't talk like a politician. You don't think like one I get things figured out with your spy wife Yeah, and I think we're ready to just campaign it. What's the timetable here? Is there an election coming up in Oklahoma? Yeah, well there is one coming up next year. I'm probably like 20 25 30 years out

I was ready to get the grassroots out. You know, so it's a longterm play. I was ready to get the grassroots going, dude. I was getting a street team together over here. Well, you know, first I have to become independently wealthy cause I think anymore at the run for governor, you've got to have at least like $10 million to make that campaign work. You got to be T. Boone Pickens' grandson or something. Yeah. That's right. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm not, um, I went to Oklahoma state. I've been to Boone Pickens stadium. I, uh, go don't, don't have any relationships to that family. Otherwise. Well, it's a

good start. What's your slogan going to be? Hmm. I think that's a good question. I guess I haven't quite figured that part out. Come Oklahoma. Come on. I mean, it was going to be something lame, like, you know, you know, for the people or something like that. How about we, the people, we, the people kicking asphalt or something. You know? Yeah. Lean into that. I think you should just run this year and see what happens, you know, cause you'll get headlines. Yeah. You'll get headlines being the youngest one, you know? And yeah, you know, because you'll get a headline. Yeah, you'll get headlines being the youngest one, you know. And yeah, you know, I think in Tennessee, I don't know what the exact rules

are in Oklahoma, but in Tennessee, to get on the ballot, all you need is a thousand signatures. Oh, I think we can drum up a thousand signatures here in Oklahoma. And we could have that done by nightfall. Yeah, I'll send you four just for me. You know, let's get this going. Yeah, yeah, I'll send you guys. I'll send you guys a mail in deal and then for mail in deals.

And if I could get a thousand back, that'd be great. Well, you'll make that happen. I love it, man. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we appreciate you calling in today, man. We're excited for your political journey. You're embarking on. We'll see you in 30 years at the top. Good luck. Pave in that red dirt road. Yeah. Like that. That's what you got to do. You got to pave the way type of slogan. I think the way paving that. Yeah, we can do that. Yeah, we'll find it. We got 30 years. Yeah, we got 30

years to workshop this. And so I've got 30 years to become independently wealthy in Washington. It's time to put Oklahoma in the HOV lane. It's time to teach Oklahomans where we are on the map. Okay. It's a little clumsy, the wording, but I like the idea. The high schools had state testing today and I'm a little concerned about what's going on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, those numbers are going to play into this election, you know.

So this was great. Yeah, we'll look out for this, okay? Do kind of get to the bottom of this stuff with your wife though. That's going to come up to bite you in the ass, all right? So when she gets home from work tonight, should I just like have a lie detector test. Like in interrogator. Yeah. And one of them, it's all nine or how do you say? No, I say no. Okay. Nine. Nine. What's yes in German? I think it's just yaw. Yeah. You can't have that answer that quick. It starts to get suspicious. You need to fumble with a little.

It's inspiring how well you've embraced your wife's heritage. You don't know how to say yes or no. I know how to say butter, please. There you go. There you go. All right. Yeah. Well, man, we appreciate calling in. Have a good one. Yeah. You're the man. Good luck, buddy. That guy was great. Yeah. I'm voting for him. He was funny. He was you actually felt for him, Charlie. Yeah. In Oklahoma. Sure. Have any plans to move to Oklahoma? No, I just was mail in one from Wisconsin. You might though never say never, you know? Yeah, I guess you could live anywhere. I've been to Oklahoma before.

You know, I never have. Yeah, I can't believe they have an NBA team in Oklahoma. I know. Yeah. I think about that. Iowa doesn't even have one. You know, I would have a shit. Oklahoma is way bigger than Iowa. Right.

Is it? I mean, space wise, I'm met by a factor of three in population. I would have to have shit. Oklahoma's way bigger than Iowa. Right. Is it? I mean, I bet by a space why I met by a factor of three in population. Really? Oh, that's my guess. I always got Cedar Rapids, though. And the view to view you see that import Cedar Falls, the way to wrap the city. I thought you said you met like a water park.

No, I got six flags. You're sitting at like a water park. You got six flags. Yeah. That sounds like me trying to pitch North Dakota. We have interpretive centers. Interpret that how you want. Continental divides in North Dakota. That's big time.

Yeah. I drove across. I saw the sign. Yeah. I was just out there in Fargo. Yeah. That's big time. Yeah. I drove across. I saw the sign. Yeah, I was just out there. Fargo. Yeah, that's where I live. I'm a friend of Sioux Falls. Mm hmm. It's a good track. Different state. But it may get to East Fargo at all. What is the East Fargo?

I think I was just in the middle. Morehead, Morehead. It's just a bad joke because there's no East Fargo. Oh, there's a small. No, it's right next to Minnesota. It's a it's a geography joke. Oh, you's a small. No, it's right next to Minnesota. It's a geography joke. Oh, you know, it's OK. Not a lot of people get it.

I don't look up all that part of the map that often. Yeah, it's kind of keep it in the middle. What do you think of Fargo when you're there? Great people. I had a what's the food that everybody tells you to get. I had a OK. So I was at some diner in Fargo. Kroll's Diner. I can't remember what it was. It didn't feel like it wasn't like I looked up the place to be.

It was just the diner. And I was there in the server. It goes, oh, man, you got to try. It's the signature food of Fargo. Nefla soup, sour cream and raisin pie. Sour cream. You've never heard of it. I raise you heard of that. She was like, we cannot keep sour cream and raisin pie. Sour cream. You never heard of it? Raisin pie. You heard of that? She was like we cannot keep sour cream and raisin pie.

I didn't. I've never on the on the shelf. We can't keep it really. And then she went back to the kitchen. She came back. She goes. I'm about to make your year. I found a piece of sour cream and raisin pie back there and we ate it. It was alright.

But she made it sound like you haven't been to Fargo unless you've had the sour cream and raisin. I've never even heard of that. What's your food? What's your thing? Oh, you know, pizza. There's a diner. So the diner I brought up. Yeah. New York style pizza. Domino's. It's this place. Yeah. I mean, you're right. If you're asking about food and Fargo, you're asking the wrong question. That's true. You're there for the wrong reason. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It's way better places to go. If you're looking for food, you know, we do a lot of lefts around the holidays. You know what? Left says, no, basically just flattened potatoes.

That kind of looks like a tortilla Norwegian stuff. It's like, Oh yeah. It's like, uh, it's like a tortilla, but with potatoes and not a potato pancake though. No, not like a crepe. Okay. It's like this whole process. It takes a long time. Do you eat it? You eat it once. Yes. So you put butter on it and then I usually put some sugar in there as well. It's pretty good. Sweet. That does sound good. That sounds good. I'm hungry for some lefse right now. Fargo is a huge money laundering place. Too. For whom? I read it on the internet once.

It's like the Cayman Islands and North Dakota. There's a lot of shell companies that they put there. Just because it's hard to get out there. I don't know. To investigate there. I don't know. Investigate. I don't know what it is. I think you guys have some laws that are favorable, favorable to shell companies somehow. I mean, someone can double check that with the Google machine, but or not. I mean, it is interesting.

A lot of cities in the Midwest are a mob run. People don't like to talk about it. Yeah, but a lot of them out there, Northern Indiana, Illinois, and yeah, I even think Iowa's got some mob members. Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah. I mean, we, we, in Wisconsin, all the gangsters went on vacation in Northern Wisconsin, Al Capone. Really? Yeah. Yeah. And they still have their hideouts out there. Yeah. John Dillinger, okay. Um, you know, Bugs Moran, they would all just head up to Wisconsin.

They had tunnel systems to run their booze up there. A lot of bars and homes have tunnels underneath them. Wow. Yeah. From the from the gangsters. So I like how like after the fact now, we're like, oh, that's so cool. But it's like, you're like what these guys have done to society. Oh, yeah, they're horrible. Yeah, it takes a while. Takes a while to like embrace. But it's like you're like what these guys have done to society. Oh, yeah, there are horrible Takes a while takes a while. They're like embrace. Yeah, I ate at G time. That's right. Yeah.

Killed more people on the planet than anybody else ever. I think it's like one out of every six people has his DNA. Yeah, he was a big pillage. He would pillage. Yeah. Not a not a thing you want to think about. But you know, he did populate a lot of the deal and now we have grills named after me. I mean, at what point are people going to start making grills after other bad people?

Yeah, there you go. Pol Pot. Fill in the blank there. That's a mad lib. That's for you guys to figure out so you get in trouble. Mouth muffins. All right, boys. We got a voicemail on deck here. Here we go

My name's Aries, I'm 11 And I'm dating this girl I'm dating this other girl And they actually met each other And they started talking about me and then she said we're gonna have a long talk But I'm kind of scared now, but I'm gonna sleep so. Oh my God, that's that's the best voicemail we've ever gotten.

That's incredible. Eleven years old, eleven years old, date a girl, date another girl they met in class in the same class must be a different school. It must be. Yeah, that's true. And now she said we got to have a long talk. He like just got the Snapchat from her saying we need to have a long talk. And this is where he turned. It's so interesting that these 11 year olds are able to. I wasn't texting people at 11. I would have just had to show up at school and have a long talk.

No, you first got a note in your locker. That's true. We need to talk at, you know, see it kickball. Wow. 11 years old. The kid flew too close to the sun. Yeah, that's that's unfortunate. You know, at 11 years old, you got to be kind of you got to be playing, you know, the field a little bit. You can't be out there like committing yourself.

You're 11. It's never going to work. You know, why are you bringing sand to the seashore? You're in school, dude. Just enjoy it. What's the earliest couple that you know of? Were like the earliest they started dating. I know a few that, uh, like started dating in like middle school and now they're married. It works for me. Did that really? Yeah. So this kid's not far off from finding his wife. One of these two women could be as well bear his children. That's kind of beautiful. When you think about it.

Really? And this will be part of the story he tells his grandkids. And it's nice. They're getting it out of the way right away. Right. In fourth grade, I cheated on your mom and now it's kind of a sweet story. By the time the other guys running for governor, this will all have been smoothed over. Yeah. Oh my God. I can't believe that we got 11 year olds listening to us. I'm kind of rethinking some things now. Where would you go at 11 to like hang out? I'm just imagining an 11 year old date. Where do you go?

Trampoline park. Were y'all big mall? Trampoline park. I didn't. Now they would do that. They got trampoline parks. I don't know if I'd heard of that as a kid. No, we didn't have them.

That's a new thing. That's a new deal. That's a post 9-11 thing. I think I feel I mean, unrelated to 9-11, but post 9-11, there was a there's a bunch of murmurs about like who did 9-11. And so to distract us, they invented trampoline. It's all a smokescreen.

I know that falls flags and trampolines. But were you big mall people was like the mall, the move. I, I never, I worked at the mall that was about it, but that wasn't until I was like 15. Okay. You know, at 11 years old, I think I was out on my bike. Yeah. You know, a hundred percent just around the neighborhood. Yeah. Then my mom would stick her head out, just yell my name and I come running between things. Depending on the tone. You know, yeah, I'll let her call again. See if this one's an important deal. Yeah. But then if dad starts calling, then you run your ass home.

You know, that's how that goes. But yeah, 11 years old. No, just messing around. And you know, there's this one me and my buddy. We would go find the used cigarettes outside the church and go take them to the woods, smoke them, you know, just the butt. Well, a little bit of nicotine. Yeah, you know, and his he stole his dad's Winston lighter and we had to put that thing to use. Wow. So that was 11 for me.

Good times. Yeah. Yeah. Eleven probably on there. And then, like, as I got older, we just hang out the Dairy Queen. The DQ. What a spot. Yeah. Yeah. 11 probably not on there, but then like, as I got a little older, we just hang out the dairy queen, the DQ. What a spot. Yeah. We were doing this. This kid's in a love triangle and having real problems with it. And he sounded scared there. These kids are growing up faster, man. But it's also something beautiful about a kid's first long talk with a girl, you know, just something so pure about that. Yeah. He's about to learn so much about how the world works. I got to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.

It would be pretty probably put me in jail actually, you know. Why are you in the closet? This kid's bedroom. Who's that guy behind the ski ball machine? But I think my advice, dude, man to man, I think, look, I think you've been caught. I think you I think you own up to it. And I think you move on. I mean, you're 11 by the time you're 12, you know, things are going to look different. The world's going to look different. You'll be a different man. You will. And I know you seem scared and things are overwhelming right now.

I can promise you there will be a time in your life when you reflect back on what you're going through now and you'll laugh or you'll just. He could go the other route, just start gaslighting both of the girls. It's like, isn't that funny? You think like there's 11 year olds out there that are just going to be the worst gas lighters when they get older. I wasn't talking to her. I can know who she is.

Yeah, it's a fake account. But I think you're going to have to pick one even to do that. You got to pick one. Yeah. Right. So flip a coin and the truth will set you free. That's right. Truth will set you free. God bless America. Amen. Well, man, we appreciate you coming on the. Yeah, this is great. Super. Thank you guys. Thank you all for having me. Y'all enjoy your time in Nashville and let me know when you're back. Yeah, I'm sure. And what

sounds great? Where can people get tickets to come see on the road and Weber comedy.com is my MySpace page. Check it out. I got all it is MySpace page. Check it out. I got all my dates and everything on there. I have a special out on YouTube. Nate Barghetti produced it. It's on his YouTube channel. Let's go. It's called Signature Dish. 30 minutes. It's easy.

Put it on while you mow the lawn or whatever. And thank you guys for having me. This was great. Dude, thank you. Yep, 100%. Well guys, thanks for tuning in to another episode of Belly.Up Podcast. Tip your bartender. Tip your bartender.

There you go. And we'll see you in the next one. Okay, hope you guys in the next one. Okay, hope you guys have a good one. Goodbye now.