Berner Phone - Berner Phone #101: What's Bugging You

Episode Date: July 28, 2025

Who needs therapy when you have Berner Phone? The dialers are getting the things that are bothering them off their chest this week. get tickets to Hannah's tour  get tickets to see Des live

Do you love soft sheets? I know a lot of our burnafone listeners love that sensation of getting into a comfy bed. I certainly know Hannah does. Well, you may have heard me say it before, but I just want to remind you that bowl and branch sheets are the nicest sheets I've ever experienced. Bole and brand signature sheets are made free from toxins with the finest 100% organic cotton. And when I tell you, that when you get in, you're just automatically like, oh, yeah. I mean, it's hard to believe how nice it makes the body feel. Butery soft to start, and they get softer with every wash. It's hard for Hannah to know that because she's not great at doing the laundry,

but when I do the laundry, these sheets come out softer. They come with a 30-night worry-free guarantee, and they're ethically crafted by expert artisans that earn fair wages. but by the way, Hannah and I have this other issue, which is we don't really agree on the temperature of the bedroom because Hannah is a hot sleeper, which is why we also love the percal sheets because they're made free from toxins, just like their signature sheets with 100% organic cotton, they're ultra-crisp with a special cooling weave. So you never sleep hot again.

And they also come with a 30-night worry-free guarantee, and they're ethically crafted by expert artisans. So have you not tried Bowling Branch sheets yet? I can't get enough of them. Get the best savings of the season during Boland Branch's annual summer event. Get 20% off plus free shipping on your first set of sheets at bolandbranch.com slash burn. B-O-L-L-L-Nch.com slash burn, B-E-R-N. That's Bolandbranch.com slash burn to save 20% off and unlock free shipping.

limited time only and exclusions apply hi it's hannah burner and des bishop thanks for calling the burner phone if you leave a message after the tone we may have to make it into a podcast hello my little dialers it's ma and pa mom and poppy mummy

it's mommy and poppy Mommy and Paul Pop Paul It's your mom and your pop We're so excited To be back for another week Of burner phone Ooh I hear wind chimes in the background

It's probably not coming through though It may be coming through If it is coming through Let me explain We as you know We're fostering kittens These ones have gotten very lively Yes

But they stink They absolutely stink so we've had to keep the windows open and Hannah bought some lovely wind chimes outside our door they're literally in like WWE mode I know but we every podcast now there's like

I think we need to focus not keep giving the kittens the space well listen we love the kittens I just don't know if it's translating across audio I just want to say we're just setting the stage for people so they know what we're doing

but also with kittens they don't smell they're just growing so they're eating a lot and pooping a lot listen Hannah has this thing that like dogs smell and cats don't but this room stinks can we just can we just we're in a closed small room with and let's be honest I'm not perfect with doing the litter every time but I've been cleaning litter they stink both we've had this is our second set of three foster kittens

and this room stinks just admit it cats don't smell okay Hannah has let her cat love bias her opinion about how much this room stinks. Look, when you love something, they're perfect. I'm happy to have the room stink. Yes. But the reason why you're hearing wind chimes

is because the windows have to be open. And when the windows are open, they don't smell at all. It's beautiful out. But they also love my Delta headphones, and my Delta headphones are used when we're recording this pod. So they think the Delta headphones are out for them. So they got a little pumped up at the beginning

as we were getting, as we spent, as all our podcasts begin with a 24, minute untangling of the delta headphones because if anybody knows anything about delta headphones it is that they are the easily why the headphones just love getting tangled by the way yeah what is going on they should be you know the way toy story was like the toys when yeah there should be like a short Pixar should make like a short of what headphones do when nobody's looking oh my god that's so funny they're like it's time it's time to fuck with these people who are too cheap to buy good headphones

So they keep taking the Delta headphones. But then I was thinking there must be like an invention. But then I was thinking the big headphone business, they like when headphones get tangled because then people have to buy more headphones. Big headphone. Is that the latest? Alex Jones episode. Big headphones.

I do also think, though, like Delta is keeping headphones in business. These motherfuckers have so many. And they keep offering them. Like, I take them because I don't take them for the flight. I take them because we use them. Yes, I take them because I know that the cats are enjoying them. But I did American Airlines this last week, and not one headphone was offered. Wow.

Whoa, Hannah, are you going after our brand here? Well, no, you know why? It was because there weren't TVs. It was a very short flight. It was a very short flight. I take that back. But no, I'm doing American Airlines now because we had a trip to Japan that we had to cancel. So we have some credits I have to fulfill.

So your girl is changed. She does American now. I was very lost and scared at first I know it feels like visiting another country or something actually we could start off with yeah what's bugging you what is bugging you

the tangling of headphones no I love the art of tangled headphones you don't have to take your shoes off on TSA so do you not feel as special that you're at TSA pre now because now they don't have to take their shoes off either I'm so confused with it all because I was going to Canada and they made me take my laptop out

and I was like in Canada on the Canadian side. I said, what is this torture? Well, you know why it is? Because they haven't upgraded their scanners. Oh. So the more updated scanners, you don't have to take your laptop out. This is my thing when I go about life.

Unless someone says it to my face or there's like a huge blinking light, I don't know ever. But people assume that you should know things, probably because other people more observant than me. So I go up there. So somebody was frustrated that you didn't take it out? Yeah.

Who? The guy. Some, a Canadian? Yeah. A Canadian was aggressive with you? Actually, the Canadian. Excuse me. No, he was like, sorry, sorry.

You have to, sorry. You have to take out your laptop. He, he, um, then also I was, there was no one in line. It was like early and I was walking and this guy was like yelling something. And I was just as a New Yorker ignoring him. And I finally, like, walk up to him. And he's like, hello? And I'm like, well.

And he's like, I've been talking to you the whole time. And I was like, oh, I didn't know you're talking to me. He goes, who else am I be talking to you? And I was like, it's like a sketch? You literally. And I was like, why were you yelling? I'm right here. So what was it?

He was just like being really friendly. And I just assumed he was like, oh, I didn't assume he was being friendly talking to me. Because also it was early in the morning and I'm like, there's no way this guy is trying to like talk to me while I'm walking up in this line. So that's bugging me. All right. That's a fair bug. Right into flying, straight away.

I go right into flying. The only flight of your entire summer. And all hell broke loose. Now, there's nothing, but you know what? I'm going to, stuff as we go along will remind me of what's bugging me. I will say something's bugging me and I don't want to say anything specific. Oh, wow, you're getting into it. When people talk at you for too long.

Oh, right, yeah. I think there has to be like a little alarm clock in people's brains where if If you are talking for more than four minutes and you're not a stand-up comedian, even if you are a stand-up comedian, you got to get some type of call and response in a conversation. Because I've been stuck in a couple conversations recently where I, and I talk a lot. I haven't been able to get a word in for like a long time. Kind of impossible. It's actually like Einstein wouldn't be able to figure out the formula for how Hannah wasn't

able to get a word in. But it's funny. When I'm in those, I like clam up when I realize I'm in. one of those talker aters. Somebody's talker aters. And you know what I think I'm... Well, no, the worst talking at her is somebody that's talking at you about their life and you don't give a fuck. That's the problem. And let's be honest, most of the time you don't. Well, you know, I mean, especially, you know, we don't get to too much. But also I think I have a very responsive face. I care about people's lives and I'll listen to people's stories, but not to the

point where I can't be involved. Well, it's... Or we're not like sharing some. stories well i think also it's sometimes people are lonely and they want someone to listen to them and i do think i have a kind responsive active listening face right which i'm not which for some reason tells certain people a certain type of person to keep going and it's i think some but then sometimes people just have a lack of social Yeah, I think it's the... We're talking about the lack of social awareness. Yeah.

I wouldn't even bring in what you were saying. I was actually trying to change my face to be like, if I change it, will they stop? Like, maybe it's because my face is telling them to talk more. But also, I'm just talking about, like... Yeah, in general. Yeah, we're talking in general. In general. I'm not talking about, like, going to dinner with a friend.

Like, you're allowed to talk to me as long as you want. Yeah, but you can have a talker at her in the friend group. Oh, actually 100%. But then sometimes it's like... It's that person's time. Like, you know, there's someone in the friend group who's having a moment, and it's like, you got to let them vent. Yeah, but that's fine.

But I'm talking about somebody who's a consistent talk or at her. Yes. And it's almost like the minute they're finished talking, they tune out, they're just waiting for the next thing that they're going to say. I'm talking about when you go to, like, a place and you don't really know the person that well, and they, for some reason, think it's their time to give you a long speech about something. Yeah. Well, said, Hannah.

I think we need more back and forth. Yeah. There should be, you know what, there should be like a time. I also think if anyone's confused about it, it's when you're talking, get aware of their responses and give them opportunities to get out if they want. Yeah, and also like notice when people glaze over, you know? When they start going, that's crazy. I'll think of mine as we go along. I think everything's bothering you all the time. No, that's just like, that's how I present, but it's actually not true. I just give off that energy. I do try to explain

to people like Des will be playing volleyball and he is a very intense face. This is a story of from the past, I can assure you. From the past. Thanks for bringing it up. And I look over I'm like, you see Des right now, he's having the most fun of his life. Like, this is the best moment of his day right now. And you look and you look so intense and miserable. It's my concentration face. And I'm like, he's having the time of his life. Literally when I was on Dance with the Stars in Ireland, I had like, I got critiqued over like my facial expressions. Well, you're like me. You have an expressive face too. I'm an expressive face. All right. Well, you know what? I wasn't going to start with this, but in celebration of your experience at TSA in Canada, let's begin with this one.

Yeah. What's bugging me is Canadian bacon. It's a fucking lie. It's just ham. That's not bacon. Fuck off. that was a guy showing off in front of his girlfriend or his wife because I just read them I didn't even know it was a guy we don't know the gender when we pick we don't know the guys on this one by the way well because men are angry only because like but but you know what I'm starting to I got to worry I think three of these might be the same guy but he's like going off well because the other two if we get to them the other two are him saying uh my girlfriend's a big fan, but I have a funny feeling that the three guys are him making his

girlfriend laugh, who's clearly think it's hilarious. And by the way, I think, I think a comedian, I think, I think a comedian has done a bit about that. But also, I have always, so in, in, in the UK and Ireland, I think they call it gammon, gammon, ham. Oh, you're talking about ham. Well, because it's about Canadian bacon. Well, it's like, If you ordered French fries in France and they just... Oh, it's freets. If you order French fries in France and they just gave you potatoes. Yeah.

That's what he's saying with Canadian bacon. Yeah, but here's the thing. In Ireland, you know, first of all, corned beef. Did you know that in Ireland, corned beef and cabbage is not a thing? Did you know that? I never thought about it. Well, it's an Irish American thing because people always joke about corned beef and cabbage. Yeah.

And growing up, I was like corned beef and cabbage is Irish, but it's not. Yeah. So what's Irish is bacon and cabbage. But bacon is ham. It's boiled ham. Oh. Because that was the dish. Everything was, you know, boiled. Everything was boiled over the fire. I do have a kink for breakfast in other cultures. And I've done the Canadian breakfast. And you know what? I like to see how people start their mornings. I like Canadian bacon, by the way. And I like it for what it is. Some people would say American bacon is too crispy. Crispy or salty. But I also. So I love when it's so crispy, it's just melt in your mouth. I like them all for what they are. I don't have a problem. Canadian bacon is, in Canada, you order Canadian bacon. You clearly know what you're getting, you know, in, in, particularly in the north of Ireland, I feel like I've often got the gammon, you know, which is essentially Canadian bacon.

But then in Ireland, we don't say bacon for what we know is bacon. We say rashers. Well, also, you guys do the black pudding, which is so funny, because if I didn't know, I wouldn't know that I was eating innards. and I think I was just eating, like, a grain pudding. Yeah, it's blood pudding, basically. The official term should be blood pudding. But, you know, at the end of the day, different cultures say different things.

A racher, actually, an Irish racher, which is, I'm not going to say it's superior to American bacon. It's just different, you know? An Irish racher is really halfway between American bacon and Canadian bacon. I do think this is really the halfway point. This was a perfect message because it's something that it's not. It's not, it's just bugging you a little. It's funny though. Great delivery. I love the laugh track in the background.

Great delivery. Look, we, I have to be honest, there's a lot of couples that listen to Burnerphone. They, they find a safe space for both genders. And listen, I'm going to, I'm going to space out the ones that I think might be from the same gang. Okay. But they may be, and I'll be very happy to be wrong. We don't want to be colonized by this man. Here's another, another odd one that, you know, this is one of the, you know, this is one of the,

these things that's like why is this bugging you so much um hi hannah and devs not a long time listener to be honest i haven't listened that long but love it um now i want to do prompts so you got me um something that really bugs me i don't know what should but it really does is people using scissors to eat lobsters i think it's so unnecessary i think it's like the same energy as people that like eat the skin on kiwi and then like tell people that they eat the skin on kiwi like you're just eating a lobster with scissors to show me that you're eating a lobster to make a big cracking noise. I don't know. I don't like it though. I think it's really unnecessary. I don't know why it bugs me so much. It's something I think about a lot. Like even chefs do it. Why do we do it? Who decided

lobsters equal scissors? I don't know. Shouldn't bug me, but he does. Wait, when she says lobster scissors, she doesn't mean like the nutcracker thing. I kind of feel like she does, but maybe I'm wrong. She was like, eat it with your teeth, you pussy. Yeah, that's what I don't understand is like, What sections of it? She's like, I'm a mermaid, and I just down it. What's wrong with, you know, jumping out of the ocean for air and then going back under to find your lobster? Let's be honest. When you're at a seafood restaurant, the lobster is the fajita on the menu where you want to make a scene, you know?

That's a funny line. Have you said that line before? No, when would I ever have? No, but the fajita, the sizzling fajita arriving, that is a great. metaphor for peacocking. We say like when you order a seafood tower, that's also like a fajita on the menu. Like, look, you're having a main character moment. But look, it's Leo season.

I told you, I never lived it down. My dad ordered a lobster and I ordered flounder when I was like six. And I looked at him and I was like, I want that. And he traded with me and he never let me live it down. Like to this day, he'll be like, remember when I give you my lobster for your little thin ass flounder. And I'm like, dad, I was six. So here's my hot take.

Lobster is so fucking overrated. Oh yeah, you are not a lobster guy. Listen, I like it and I like a lobster tail, but like I don't get why people love lobster so much. And here's a further take. King crab legs are tastier than lobster. What's harder to eat, though? I think they're both equally hard to eat.

And I feel that I like lobster. I'll eat in the lobster roll. I'm not anti-lobster. But there is no way that lobster is worth the hassle. As a fast, as a fast. In my opinion, by the way, I totally understand that some people love lobster, but not worth the hassle. Definitely not worth the price. Look, this is going to be a divisive episode.

Not worth the price. I think that mental health moment. Lobsters are like diamonds. Lobsters are like, we just decided that it was like a fancier food. True. But it is, if you don't have lobster a lot and once a year you have a lobster, it's like a fun experience. But it's the kind of thing where like if you have it, you don't have it a lot because it's actually not like worth it. I had this, I went to this crab shack once with my dad. I think it was like

Maryland and we were like so excited. And the amount of effort it took to eat this crab with my ADHD, like I remember, I felt like I was at war with myself. And I was, I was struggling. I was hungry. I was working, I was burning calories while I was trying to eat. And it, it was very frustrating for me. Honestly, for me, all the dinners that where they bring you over like, like a clean your hands bowl. Yeah. Not worth it. Here's something really controversial, which you probably know about me. That's why I can't, I don't fuck with chicken wings.

You don't. Yeah, because it's a pain in the ass. Well, also. It's fucking messy. Can I call you out, though? What? You don't eat it the right way. What do you mean I don't eat it the right way?

Like, I eat a chicken wing like it's the last thing. No. That's in, like, you eat a chicken ring and you like leave meat on it. Like I eat the bones. Because it's fucking, I don't want the hassle. It's too much hassle. See, look, you're going to get some. some, um, what's it called the stuff that's in your nose?

Cardilage. You're going to get some cartilage. No, I don't care. But you just got to take it. It's, it's the mess. It's the mess. It's the mess. And the hassle. This is coming from the guy.

This is coming from the guy that like, God forbid if, like, cream cheese touches the wrong thing, he, like, loses mine. Listen, some people are going to disagree. But there's going to be some people out that are like, yeah, fucking, they're not worth the hassle. me. But I do have to say, I love lobster, but whenever you order, like, a lobster pasta and it's like super expensive or even a lobster roll, after the first couple bites, it's a little too much. And also, I'd argue, lobster's so good because of the butter. Yeah. You just dip it in butter. It's all about the butter. Hot take. Hot take. If you haven't had, um, what's it called when you

like boil the clams? Steamers. Steamers dipped in butter are so much cheaper and taste. case really fucking good. I love a steamer. You've never had it with me. I haven't. I love steamers. What was the other thing she said? Because there was something she said

right in the middle of she was like a throwaway comment. I was like, ooh, that was a good one too. What was it? Do we have to go back and listen again? It was like halfway through the message. She was like, it's like when somebody does this. What was it? I got to listen again because I was like, that was good too.

Yeah. People that eat the skin on Kiwi and then tell you they eat the skin on Kiwi? That is so funny. Because that's like one of those things. like, you know that most of the vitamin C is on the Kiwi skin. Antriarchones. That's where most of the vitamin C is. Well, like, why are you even eating?

Like, there's no, there's no nutrition in the Kiwi. By the way, Hannah's left. You're probably going, why is Hannah laughing so hard? This is not that funny. It's because while I was saying that, and I'm kind of contradick myself, because now I'm talking about the cat, but I need to verify why you're laughing so hard.

The cat was trying to jump all over the computer that we are using. about cats they're obsessed with laptops it's like a known thing people will buy their cats many laptops so they can sit on it i think it's like it was funny what i was saying it was very funny just wasn't as funny as your reaction i do think it's funny though when you have um people that like to brag about but i'm like what are other good things like that like skin on the kiwi well i was going to say like i eat the shrimp tail but i do it i don't tell people like i'm embarrassed that are you doing because you're just lazy well you don't want to spit it out because someone told me like you can eat it, so then I eat it.

Like, when I get coconut shrimp to the face, like, I'm not... I'm the opposite. I'm like, I don't need that last... I saw you yesterday. The last quarter of meat, I don't give a fuck. Do you know what bugs me that you do sometimes? What? We'll be, like, eating a meal, and you always love to leave, like, a little bit of it at the end.

Only in recent times, though. If you actually pay attention, that's only in recent times. It's a recent thing. Yeah, because it's like, you know what? I'm full. But it's, like, not that much. It's like one bite. I know, but I'm like...

like, you know what? I probably didn't even lead the last two bites. We were eating like cheeseburgers or something. I saw you left like the last bite of the cheeseburger and I was like, that's insane behavior. I was done. When you're done, you're done. I almost ate it for you. I didn't need the 30 calories. It was upsetting. I didn't need the last bite. I just thought it was about something that bugs me that people do. What? When they go, I just can't nap.

Some people can't nap. I just got a nap. I just can't nap. Oh, I'm so jealous. You can nap? I just can't. I just have so much energy all the time. Oh my God, you can nap. You have depression? Ew. Hey, listen, I can nap,

but I can only nap for like 15 minutes. I wish that I could fucking nap like you, which is essentially a whole other night's sleep in the middle of the day. When I nap, if I don't set an alarm, like, the day's gone. The day's gone. And some people are like, I don't like to nap because I feel worse afterwards. Well, I feel worse before, too.

So pick your poison. Yeah, I think I get that I feel worse afterwards, but like for me, it's like, yeah. for a short period of time but long term throughout the rest of the day that nap is going to serve you well I also sometimes have no other choice but to nap like my body shuts down

like if I'm sitting down I'm falling asleep I was kind of distracted by trying to think of other things like the kiwi skin but anyway guys hey message in funny things like that people think they're better than everybody else because they do

all right let's let's crack it on that's a good prompt though what makes you think you're better than other people. Oh, yes. Good prompt. It's a good one. Our episodes are just us thinking of other prompts. All right.

This is something that we care about. Okay, so this is actually my second submission. But I had to show, this is another one that gets me. You guys talked about it on one of your most recent pods, dogs that bark. I live on the first floor closest to the front door of my apartment building. I have a cat. She's sweet. She meows.

She talks to me. me she's not loud page you know just because when you had said just because you're the loudest the room doesn't mean you're right these neighbors of mine have two dogs that bark from sun up to sundown to the point where i'm not i've had the most terrible thoughts like let me bake some like dog treats and put a little bit of gabapentin in it or something it this is supposed to be summertime this is supposed to be stress free time i'm breaking out from the amount of headaches I'm getting, I want to, like, I'll train them. I just can't. I can't. So, so frustrating, had to share. So we had a, I don't think so. Okay. So we had a clip on Giggly

squad where I basically said barking, if you think about a barking's like insane. Like barking is just yelling. Yes. And it's like dogs just think they could yell at any moment. And like, by the way, guys, I do love dogs. No, we, listen. And I, I'm, you know that I'm, you know that I'm a dog guy. Yeah. But we have a neighbor in our apartment building and the fucking dog barks all day. All day, all day long. And I feel bad for it.

But I was just thinking of the concept. But I haven't been able to bring myself to write the, because I went down and I was like, what do I do? And they're like, you're going to make an official complaint. And I haven't been able to bring myself to make the official complaint. But at the same time, listen, I love dogs. But like, they don't know. This is the thing.

A lot of times people don't know. That their dog is barking all day. Yeah. Well, just the concept of barking. is funny to me, like that dogs, that's their yell, and that all day they'll just be like, I'm going to yell right now. But you're not sure if they're yelling, though. You're assuming they're yelling.

But it comes out as a yell. Yes, to us. To us, it comes to humans. It's perceived as a yell. They think they're whispering? I don't know if they know the concept of whispering. Or they're just like, yo, yo, yo, yo, I don't know if dogs know that they could whisper. I don't know if dogs could be like, hey.

No, but you know what? I'd rather not be on my own all day. No, dogs do have a whisper. You know, when someone's like coming at the door and they go, who you know they make that who yeah that's that's a dog whisper that's a dog going what's that what's that

who's that that's fine I think that's funny the concept and I'm just saying the cats yes cats do have like meows when they're hungry that could be like really loud sometimes but yeah the concept of barking is just so funny to me but I do have to say little dogs some little dogs are

yappy yeah yappy yapps and how it's just so funny when someone owns a dog they get kind of used to it but if you like walk into someone's house the whole time they're telling the dog to shut up and their dogs just yelling back at them and I'm like are you guys in a fight like do you want to work this out all right let me phrase it another way dogs you know dog's perception of what's going on is obviously different to ours and they they're interrupting my conversation they may think that they've been abandoned so if you were like

stranded somewhere you would be like all day help me oh my god this guy that looks after me I don't think he's ever coming back. No, yeah. That's like when they see something that's like scary, like they see a bird and they're like, what the hell is that thing? Yes. And they're yelling.

But I'm just saying there's a lot of yelling going on. No, but I'm agreeing with this person that like it's torture. Because here's the thing. I love dogs. And I'm going to play another dog prompt immediately after this to keep the theme going. I love dogs. But as I've gotten older throughout my now nearly 50 years of life, life the sort of the tolerance for dogs which I love has in some situations gone too far in that

you know dogs humans are horrible okay I'm not saying we're great and we've domesticated dogs for our own satisfaction but you are sharing the world with other humans and other humans are not really responsible for the negative aspects of you owning a dog it's not our job so I think some people have gone a little too far with sort of like us just accepting their dogs into our world. Yeah. Well, I... And I'm talking about that as a responsible dog. Like cats and dogs, I think some dogs are assholes, some dogs are great, some cats are assholes, some cats are great. There's a lot of dog propaganda, I think, of like, all dogs being man's best friend, where families are like, we have to get a dog, and then they don't properly train it. And then

the dog is a pain in the ass the whole time but they almost like are fine with it because they're like we have a dog but then you go to their house and the dog's jumping on you and eating food and smells like shit and you're just like

no thank you yeah because you're not in denial about that fucking dog smelling like shit because I have to watch my hands afterwards I have to wash my hand after these kittens because I'm allergic anyway let me play you this you guys were going to get a divorce because of this kid by the way

Des was the one who wanted to foster no I'm just I first of all I'm joking But Hannah, Hannah doesn't accept that I'm allergic to cats, which is another issue. I'm just going to play this. Hi, Des. Hi, Hannah. Big fan here and Giggler. But what's bugging me is that I live in Los Angeles.

And honestly, I'm tired of dogs being everywhere. I went thrift shopping today and I'm like tripping over people's dogs in the thrift store. There's no need. They're not service animals. I get service animals 100%. I'm talking about people who just bring their pets everywhere. stores aren't that big here I'm tripping over dogs in the grocery store

stepping I'm not stepping on them but I'm tripping over them when I go shopping literally everywhere you go there's always so many dogs and I know LA is a pet friendly city but I'm kind of over it it's really bugging me that there's just always dogs everywhere you fucking go yeah so this is one of these things

because I'm actually I like the fact that we have more dogs everywhere because I love dogs but I do this is really just an extension of what I was saying, which is that, like, I feel like some people love their dogs so much that they don't understand that, like, not everybody loves their dog. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Especially people that, like, listen, this is not directed at anybody in our life. This is throughout a long life. But when people have to bring their dog to your house and they don't respect the rules that you put down for your house, that's fucked up. You know? And I get it. You need to bring your dog

because for whatever reason. Well, some people's dogs and cats can control their life. Like, I know people who are like, I can't go because of my dog. Yes. Or like, my dog's ruining my marriage. Or like, my dog is just like

really making my life very difficult. My dog's ruining my marriage really feels like a daily mail headline. But anyway, sorry. But also, devil's advocate, as an animal lover, there's nothing better than like you're going through your boring day

and then you see a fucking an adorable dog walking on the street. I love it. I love it. It lights you up. But then there's also the weird like, are you allowed to pet it? I know. Because I'm always like, I'm always down to pet. And then sometimes it's like your dog came up to me.

And sometimes they're weird about it. But that whole dog culture I'm pretty unfamiliar with, but I know that in New York City, because it's such small quarters, there's a whole dog social system of walking that I'm not. Guessing breeds. Yeah. And then like you let them sniff.

That's what I love having foster pit bulls and like, oh, what kind of dog is that? It's like, well, it's a mixed breed, but his father used to kill other dogs for money in Alabama. I also, dogs in the elevator. I do, New York City. It's awkward with humans on the elevator, whatever about dogs. No, then you have a killer pit bull in elevator and you're like, no, that's why. That's why I couldn't foster the dogs in the city.

But this is why also we're speaking from a New York City perspective too in this. this woman in L.A., dogs in the city is a different type of challenge. That's why growing up, I always had cats because in Brooklyn, which is more favorable to dogs than Manhattan, it's still like they wouldn't have had a big backyard. Like, you have to literally take them on a walk and shit on a sidewalk in front of someone. And there's poop everywhere. We have fights because dogs have to pee in front of our apartment complex.

Sorry, go ahead. Yeah, and how the dogs, clearly they go outside and they go, I want to pee, but then the apartment complex is like, don't let them pee right there. Make sure they pee on the corner. Yeah, because we have like a long pathway from the door to the actual sidewalk. Yeah. So the dogs are peeing there and people are getting mad. Yeah. And that never bothered me by the way. Never bothers me either. But you know that it's bothering some people. Bothering someone. Someone's on it. Somebody doesn't want to walk over piss. Yeah. And then I have this kind of, I've been working on this new stand-up routine based purely on the fact that, dogs love sniffing my pussy and it's very embarrassing for me but now i've kind of leaned in to be like i think dogs like smithing they like sniffing all pussies yeah so like it's not your pussy in particular but it's like it's funny like i get into it is the humor that that you're worried your pussy stinks or is it humor that will i lean in that's like my pussy doesn't stink

it's i have a peanut butter pussy and like that kind of thing and they use me for they use me for missing dogs stop using peanut butter vagusil Yeah. They use me for missing dog searches and I'm not going to get all into it. I have to do meet and greet when I see a dog walker. Oh yeah. I have a whole bit about dogs putting their snout up my pussy. But I'll literally, I hate it when I'm like in the elevator and you're trying to be nice. And the dog's snout is like up my canal. And I have to be like, ooh, sorry. Oh, God. Stay away from greyhounds. Get right in there. The target dog.

No, you know, greyhounds. I know, but do you know the target dog? What is the target dog? It's the white one with a really long girthy snout. Oh, right. I'm like, no, it can't fit. You got to loop it up. Actually, it's a good sex toy line. You know, because people love dogs.

By the way, I think a great reality TV show would be the dog park. Should I not have said that out loud? No, maybe. Dog park dating show? Dog park dating. The dogs have to get along. Oh, my God. It's like, how do you meet?

clearly likes Calvin, but is... Her dog only likes large males. Her dog only likes large males. Her dogs doesn't get along with other dogs. What are they going to do? That's what I love about... So I interrupted you, though. What were you going to say?

Oh, I was going to say, yeah, like a dating game with the dog park. I was going to say, too, like if you're single, having a dog is good. Oh, definitely. It's like smoking. It's funny because I never smoked, but it's true. It's true, yeah. But I heard with smoking, you also... attract some like

smokers you're like I don't want to date an addict they're just interesting characters that you I love that South Hattenham Bishelt is like as you good with other dogs

yeah it's good with large males that are not intact she doesn't get along with other female dogs I'm like imagine they could just say that with humans like hi but it's a fucking fact

my mother was like that. She should have had that. She should have came with a fucking warning. This is Jessica. She likes long walks and hates other women. Hates other women. She's threatened by them. But she loves six, four men. Yeah. Just basically, I think whoever created the Bravo Network probably worked in dog training before. All right, here we go. I love telling you guys about Hewell. Did I have a Hewell for lunch yesterday you were damn right i did i had a cookies and cream but i really want to tell you guys about the huel black edition powder because you can get huel today with this exclusive offer for new customers are 15% off with code burner b-n-r-n-r at huel huel dot com slash burner

their black edition is a complete meal so you feel full focused and ready for your day little prep so you can grab and go huell's already sold 500 million meals around the world so Check it out for 50% off of Hewold.com with the code burner. I mean, honestly, I like all their shakes. So, you know, check out the powder, which is awesome. Check out all the Hewell products. I've literally since January been Hewling the hell out of it. I am head over heels for Hewel.

It's just so, honestly, it's just like so convenient and so tasty. And I particularly like it. you can get one of these hule shakers you know the hule shake makers and i crack it up with quite a lot of ice and i shake the crap out of it and it's just so cold and it's it's really like a nutritious dessert so much protein it's insane 40 grams when you use the black addition powder 40 grams of protein of protein plus 27 vitamins and minerals vitamins and minerals for the irish so start saving time in money without compromising your nutrition today with the exclusive offer for new customers, 50% with code burner at huel.com slash burner, h-u-e-el.com.

Hannah and I love our helix mattress. In fact, we like it so much that we got it in both our places, which sounds like an ostentatious claim. But the reality was that I had a helix mattress in one and not in the other. And the difference was just too much for me to bear. So we're a double helix. Oh, dear. is that a pun oh dear dear dear anyway i've told you guys before and i'm quite happy to tell you again

that if you've not tried out a helix mattress then you don't know what you're missing you know sometimes there was a time in my life where i when people have gone about you know the importance of mattresses i i really thought that it was just bluster blarney as we say in ireland but once you get into an amazing mattress like a helix mattress well it changes everything Plus, you know, you can track your sleep on your Apple Watch. There's just so much cool stuff about having Helix mattress. Check it out. Hannah and I really value our sleep.

And the good news is that there is a deal for burn and phone listeners starting on August 1st. Actually, what's today's date? This is pretty important, actually. It's only the 27th. So check this out, guys. The 4th of July sale is still going. 27% off-site-wide, exclusive for listeners of Brunafront until July 31st, okay? But then they have Labor Day early access sale, 20% off-site-wide from August 1st to the 14th.

So, act quick. You've got a couple of days left to get their 4th of July sale, 27% off-site-wide. HelixSleep.com slash burn, okay? Make sure to enter the code, helix sleep.com slash burn, 27% off-site wide until the 31st. But then you got a little chance to get 20% off sitewide. August 1st or August 14th, act fast. Get yourself a deal. You will not be disappointed.

Helixleep.com slash burn. All right, let me, let's find out if it's the same guy. Did you know this one? Breaking news. People that put their fucking feet on the dash in the passenger seat. get your nasty asses out I don't know what you're in but get the fuck out

I'm obsessed with it my wife's a big fan thank you for your time I knew it I'm obsessed with him even though I was reading them I knew it I'm obsessed with them and they weren't even like one after the other no I'm obsessed with him

by the way this is an issue for us Hannah likes actually I don't mind I actually don't mind bare feet on the dashboard at all. But what I don't like is when the shoes get on the dashboard and then there's like dust on the dashboard. Now let me preface this by saying I'm not putting my straight up my feet on the dashboard.

I'm not a fucking like. You like to cross your legs and then you like to keep your seat forward and then your front foot is like kicking off the dashboard. So my front, I'll cross my leg and I like to stretch out my hip because I have some lower back pain and then the edge of my shoe rests against the dashboard and you. and does not like it. But here's what's annoying about it. I say, Hannah, you know, the seat goes back

and then you're like, no, I don't want to put it back. Because I'm stretching my leg. So if I go back, then I don't get as good of a stretch. Well, you can by just literally pushing yourself forward with your body weight. Yeah, but I don't want to push myself forward. Okay, well, then you can use, you know, there's another button on the seat

where you can use the seat to push you forward, whereas the bottom part of the seat is further back, but the other bit goes more upright. True, but you know what, babe, now I have my driver's license. so I don't have to be in the passenger seat ever again. And now you're going to see all the things that would bug me. You know, like... I have a feeling that...

No, because there's certain things when you're a driver that you realize is that, like, when passengers start, like, fiddling with the radio and just doing certain things, it can be distracting while you're driving. A hundred percent. It was funny because in one of my driving tests, Greg... You've had four? Actually, no. One of my driving lessons in the beginning, Greg was, like, getting comfortable with me

because he knew I was getting confidence and he was asking me questions and I immediately was like I actually can't answer this question right now I have to focus like I couldn't talk Yeah but I think that's normal actually That's not that's fine

You know when you're in that hyper concentration mode Of early driving I think it's good Okay This is a kind of It's not political per se But it's definitely There's a feminist slant on this But I think it's worth saying

Because it's an issue Sort of close to your heart Hi Hannah Andes, I just have, you know, a lot of anger right now for NBA young boy and Nick Cannon. Now, like, I just don't understand how there are male celebrities out there that can just have, you know, like, eight, nine, ten different baby mamas, 14 different kids. And, like, barely anybody really says anything. like everyone goes whoa that's crazy but like that's it the only woman with even like somewhat close to the same amount is kate winslet who has three kids with three fathers not even close to the same amount but she gets shit on all the time same with erika baddo like it makes me so mad how women get constantly called whores and sluts yet men are the whores and sluts at every man are the whores and sluts at every she ran out of time yeah you concur I concur yeah I mean on this point 100% how could you how could

you argue it well the sometimes the men there is a double standard with that stuff oh a thousand percent and it's almost like it's the woman's job to have like this perfect home but if the man has a chaotic home people just assume like well he's just doing his thing you know yeah I mean I don't have that much to add to it but it was interesting but i actually didn't realize i i didn't know that kate wins it and erika baddue got a lot of shit for having like different dads i didn't know they they had it either i just know that like the nick hannah stuff like people definitely make fun of him but yeah but i don't i don't listen i don't mind if he's providing which i do think he is yeah so i i don't think there's i mean what like whatever it's not i i i don't get it for some reason

my brain went to politics like you ever heard condoms like i i i i understand the the con you like this guy just needs to use birth control. I don't get it. But I was, I went, my head went to politicians where I feel like there's a lot of politicians with a lot of baby mamas. Really? Well, obviously our president. Our president. I was thinking about our president. Yes. Three. Yeah. And how I don't think a woman could ever be elected president if she had like. Fucking Kamala was getting shit for the fact that her children were her stepchildren and that she wasn't actually like a real mother. But there is a, there is a double standard. There is for sure, a double standard. There's a, there's a

sort of a purity, a relative purity expected of women. Definitely in Hollywood, I've noticed there's a lot of women who are like on their second or their third husband. And I feel like it's honestly, it gets normalized once you're financially independent. It's kind of like you don't have to stay in marriages. Yeah, but here's what I don't understand. Why are these people getting fucking married? That's what I don't get.

Because I think they have everyone in their head wants, has a, traditional thing that maybe they at one point in their life thought they should do. And they're trying to make it work. No, but when you're on your second and third marriage in Hollywood in a world where everyone's breaking up after getting married, just don't get married. They want to throw a party. They want the photos. I think it's because of the publicity.

For sure. I think because of this like the industry really champions like the publicity of marriage photos and all that stuff. Yeah, and romance isn't dead. People want that love story. Yeah. But it's funny, I, you never talk about like women having

multiple marriages when you're younger and now that I'm older I realize it's a thing like you could joke like this people be like this is my first marriage and this is whatever and it makes things less scary when you commit to something because you're like life

can go in any different way. Yeah I just think that like I just don't understand people wanting to be married as much as they do. Especially when you're on like if you've had two marriages that haven't worked out it's like hey I'm just not going to get married the next time. Like, what's the fucking point?

There are a lot of stories that I love of people who are, like, in their 70s, been together for 10 years. They're dating. Yeah, but that's fine, but one of their ex is probably dead. Yeah, but or also they've had a bunch of relationships and they're just like, I don't care to get paperwork involved in this. Oh, yeah, no, that's sorry, I thought you were saying you're married again. Yeah, no, fuck that. Yeah, they just want to stay dating. Let's normalize not getting married.

I know we got married, but it's our first marriage. I know. Our only marriage. meant to say. A first and last, because you only have a couple of years. Only a couple of years left. All right. Oh, this is a biggie with me.

You know what bugs me? It's the amount of time people spend on their phones. Like the phone addiction. Phones. I feel like a boomer when I say this. I'm 22, by the way. But like I understand, sometimes we want to let our brain rot and just scroll on social media. Cool. I don't care. There's a time and place for that. But there's not a time and place for that

when, for example, I'm meeting some friends or family that I haven't seen in forever. And then we're sitting at the table, eating, drinking coffee, talking, I don't know. And someone is in the habit of like picking up their phone every minute and scrolling a random post, not even anything important, something random and then putting it down again. I'm like, I can tell your attention is not like in with me or in the moment. So why are we even here? Do you know what I mean? Like, it really fucking bugs me.

And I've put so much effort into getting better with my screen time. And I just wish it upon everyone else. It's great. It's almost like we need to be parents to ourselves. Do you know the way parents are always like, oh, no, they don't get any screen time? Like, not giving your kid's screen time is like the boast of a good parent these days. Well, you know how they've started the warnings for kids? like if your kid is on screens too much before this age,

they're going to be not okay. A successful influencer. They're going to make a lot of money, but be insufferable. I think in a couple years, there will be like clear warnings for adults where it'll be like minimize your screen time to four hours. It'll start three hours.

I, because it's technically, as I put in air quotes, my job. And I remember when I was off social media for a bit and I was recording Gigli Squad, I was like nervous because I was like I haven't been on TikTok in two weeks. I have no fucking clue what to talk about. Like I literally felt like I was not existing because I didn't know what was going on in the world

because we talk about pop culture. And then I realized how peaceful my life was when I was off social media and that it's a choice that you want to have all these like random energies and you take for granted that every time you go on your phone you see something that elicits some kind of response to you. And I don't think,

you, it's so unnatural and I'm actually, as I'm getting older, realizing how addicted I am to my phone. Because in your head, you're like, I'm not doing anything wrong, I'm just scrolling. Yeah, but it is quite rude. And we all do it, by the way. This wasn't targeted at you. No, this is targeted towards everyone.

Everybody does that. But it's very, do you know what's so funny? You don't even know you're doing it. No. You're so in the habit. Somebody could be like mid-sentence and suddenly you're on your phone and then they're like, are you listening to me? But what's also annoying is when I've taken time to be like I'm going to leave my phone in my room

and I'm going to go do something when I come back I always feel like rude that I like missed a call or that I didn't text my friends back within the hour and so you also but that's again just a thing that's evolved into having to be available at the time because of our phones like

I forget when back then it's like if you're not with me like you might not be able to contact me. Exactly leave a message should we bring back answering machine the pressure of being accessible like even nowadays like someone will text me and I don't know the answer to something and it'll weigh on me all day that I haven't responded yet and it's like no one had to deal with that in the fucking 1600s you could have gone a little you could have gone back 25 years 1960s BC no one had to deal with that also what was her accent I knew you're going to ask that I'm going to I think it's South African I was going to say but I think it's South African But I would also understand if she was like Australian that lived in London for a long time.

But I'm pretty sure it's South Africa. Because I had some moments, I was like, that's Aussie. And then I was like, that's British. And then I was like, that's South African. I think it's South Africa. I think so. But hey, um, our listeners are just so. But it was quite, it was quite deep and meaningful.

Yes. It was beautiful and important. Love that. Hey, listen, I have the whole routine about mindful. I mean, this is, I really, I don't want to be alarmist, but I am really of the opinion that humanity is not going to survive. This is what's bugging does. And this is what.

he wakes me up telling me in the morning. Literally. The world is over. No, I don't say the world is over. I say the world is not going to be able to survive the way that we communicate. We haven't caught up with the technology. So the point I was making this morning, just to give you an insight into our morning conversations. Our light, fun morning conversations. Well, because I've been up for three hours by the time how it gets up. I've fully consumed. I've read the New York time. I've read the Washington Post. When I wake up, he's revved up on the state of our nation. have my points that need to be made.

I don't even know where I am when I wake up and does is like, this is... Actually, I had read an interesting article in the Washington Post. But anyway, I'm not going to talk about the article, but I am going to say that the point I was making was that society has had this incredible technological revolution, but we did not put in anything close to the level of regulation that was necessary for this amount of societal change. and that it's too rapid of a change for us to be able to handle

and we can already see what it's doing to humanity and that I don't, and I think that we keep thinking we're going to be able to figure it out but it seems to me to only be getting worse so I'm pretty sure that it's going to cause probably not the end of humanity but the end of humanity as we know it. I do just say the chat GPT therapy is worrying me.

You're really against the chat GPT therapy. Just if you, it's like, like all you do. That's your therapy is talk to chat GPT. Yeah, it's like a thing. Yeah. And some people are like, I go to therapy. I do chat gb.

Also I say chat gbt. Yeah, it's gpt. I say gpt and no one corrects me. Paige and I got into it. She was like, it's PT. And I was like, how do you know that? And she's like, that's like, that's three letters that you can read very easily. I say chat g, it's GBT better.

Okay. I also like, I loved the movie I robot. with Will Smith. Yeah, I never saw it. I mean, it's one of these classic, you know, the robots take over. Yes. But it's like...

It's happening. It's happening. But actually, I, everyone's so worried about AI. I'm actually not worried, like, I'm not as worried about AI as I just included

in what I'm already worried about, which is the, this sort of hypercommunication, which is just for, you know, because there's just no regulation of misinformation. Denzel Washington actually said,

of all the people, Denzel Washington, a quote, like five or six years ago, said that, we thought that all this access to information was going to make us more informed. All it did was make us more misinformed. We're just incredibly misinformed. Because the

information is still coming from humans who are biased and dumb. Full of agendas. Full of agendas. Full of agendas. But it is kind of crazy when you think of our parents and their parents and their parents, there's never been such a surge of

technological advancement than there is now. Well, this has been the most. And we still haven't figured out how to keep... And I get it. They said the same thing about the TV and the radio and it didn't happen. They still haven't figured out how to keep our headphones untangled. Yeah.

But I'm glad that... Well, they did. They made Bluetooth headphones, but you got to be organized. Yeah, they made tic-tacks. You stick up your brain. So I'm sitting in the gym and suddenly it's like, you need to recharge.

I'm like, oh, well, what the fuck am I going to do now? Why do you have an Irish accent? What am I going to... Because my phone is set to Irish. Wow. Just so you know. Wow. Recalculating route.

So I have a question, because this came up on the Bishop Exchange. How do you say, the word R-O-U-T-E. Rout. You say route? Yeah. Some people say root.

Yeah, some people say root. I'm going to take a different... Oh, no, I don't know. Wait. Okay, what's the route? I don't say that word. Well, you say get your kicks on Route 66. Yeah, you say Route 66.

But like, if you were listening to the GPS back in the day, like the old school... Route 32. Recalculating route. You wouldn't say recalculating route. savory cock than him? No. I also just, I don't like that word. Okay. I love telling you guys about Hero Bread because I am such a huge fan, especially now that I'm on my health kick since January. But I love bread and I love butter and jam. So, and by the way, it's summertime. And I love hot dogs. Did you know that their hot dog buns have zero net carbs, zero grams of sugar, 11 grams of protein,

and 22 grams of fiber. So enjoy all that hamburger buns too, by the way. Absolutely awesome way to enjoy your summer snacks by feeling a little bit better about the bread intake. But, you know, if I'm going to be true to my hero bread promotion, I got to tell you that I'm a butter and jam guy. I got through boarding school in Ireland by surviving on butter and jam. So if I can load up on a nice,

bit of toast with some carriegold butter and some jam. I'm going with Hero Bread. I'm trying to get a little extra out of my slice. Yes, you know, I love making breakfast wraps, and I absolutely adore their breakfast bagel. Sometimes I put butter and jam on that too. Sometimes I throw some egg and cheese on that bad boy. But needless to say, I'm a fan of Hero Bread.

Head to Hero Bread, because they are offering 10% off your order. Go to Hero.com. code burner at checkout. That's burner, B-E-R-N-E-R at hero.C-O. Very important. That's C-O, okay? Hero-H-E-R-O-O-O-C-O. Use code burner and you will not be disappointed. I'm going to be so honest with you guys, I don't know anything about wines. And my favorite thing when I go to a friend's house or I'm going to dinner party is to bring a good bottle of wine. And that's why I love our next sponsor, naked wines. There's nothing that screams somewhere like a good bottle of chilled rosé. Problem is I don't really know what rosé is good. And that's why naked wine is the perfect wine club

connecting you to the world's best independent winemakers. So you get world class wine delivered straight to your door. This pod is sponsored by naked wines and use our code burn for the code and password at nakedwines.com and get six bottles for just 3999. I know you're thinking, how that's way too affordable for good wine. Well, naked wine brings you amazing wine straight from the winery at up to 60% less than what you would pay in store. By cutting out all the extra costs like middlemen markups, winemakers, you get the savings without skimping on quality. My mom really loves white wine, so now whenever I go visit, I bring her one of the white naked wines, and it's perfect. And this company's been around for over 15 years and backs over 90

independent winemakers around the world to make the wine you love to drink. And and I just love supporting independent businesses. Now is the time to join the Naked Wines community. Head to Nakedwines.com slash burn. Click enter Voucher, put in my code BERN for both the code and password for six bottles of wine for just $39.99 with shipping included. That's $100 off your first six bottles at Nakedwines.com slash burn and the code and password burn for six bottles of wine for $39.99. Hi Hannah, hi Dez, huge fan, big giggler. What's bugging me?

So, like, six months ago, my husband accidentally slash secretly started taking a GLP1. And, like, of course, because he's the man, he lost 20 pounds in like 30 seconds. but literally six months dropping off and while I just feel like GLP1s need so much more research I'm kind of annoyed that he decided to have a hot girl summer and I'm over here doing Pilates like my life depends on it and I gain three pounds so he's skinny I'm fat he's probably going to leave me for his other family love you bye The funniest thing ever, because this is so fucking true. Any man I know that took GOP.

Hey, by the way, I'm on the record as taking Manjaro, so you don't have to, I don't know if you were about to sort of hide it. No bumps, in general, all the men will lose 40 pounds in like a month. I lost 40 pounds in eight weeks, which is insane. And I have friends who are on it, who it's working well. But I am doing Pilates every day, and I think I did gain three pounds. Now, you, that's muscle. it was a muscle

that was muscle no it is honestly as someone who's been in you know the fitness world men and women are so different hormonally

how our bodies move and there's a lot of times where you're just put under like the men's expectations and it's very frustrating or you're compared to what the men are doing yeah but

but also the fact she said that he he did under down low yeah he decided to have a hot girl summer and didn't tell her that's fucked up also in a relationship I feel like, do it together. That's like bonding.

Yeah. Have a Mangaro moment. Yeah. Whatever GLP won you guys are on. Like, take a hit. Because like, yeah, like when you're the only one eating. Sorry, by the way, we're joking. We're not offering any unsafe health advice.

No, unsafe health advice. But like when you're eating and he's not eating, like, it's actually like the worst feeling in the world. You're like, I'm just this gluttonous beast and my husband's daintily eating, you know, a cauliflower. For the record, that's why I stopped finishing my meal. But also, now that I am not taking it anymore, I have tried to sustain that type of eating. Well, you realize how much emotional eating you end up doing.

Yeah, because you just, here's the thing, right? For those that don't know, I took Manjaro for like eight weeks and I took like a couple of like micro doses afterwards. And you, when you're on it, you obviously eat a lot less, but you cannot fucking believe how much food you used to eat. right and it's not that it makes you a lot of people think like what are you just not hungry but that's not the case but you're particularly full very fast

right but then after which you're like holy shit like I was eating an insane amount of calories you also were very diligent with like eating healthy foods as well like it's not like you were like oh I just had because I didn't want to waste the couch you know yeah you were eating really healthy protein

whatever people are obsessed with protein right now and a lot of it has to do at GLP1s there was actually an article in the New York Times about protein bar wars And it's getting dark. Really? Yeah, because this company, I can't remember the name of the bar, but he found a way to get as much Dave bar. Yeah.

He found a way to get as much protein into a bar with the least amount of calories using a particular sort of like manufactured enzyme or something. And he discovered, because he found out about this from eating low calorie ice cream in Sweden, he found out what the enzyme was. And he bought the only company that makes it because they have a. patent. So he bought the company. And now he no longer provides that to his competitors. So that is some fucking dark business shit. Well, so he's, so he's taking over the market. Yeah, but he's, he's fucking with other companies that already had market share by taking, because the company he bought has a patent on this particular type of whatever it is. That's above my pay grade, but I have heard about these Dave bars. Yeah, 28 grams or the 110 calories.

Also, Chloe Kardashian came out with a protein popcorn. Are we losing our listeners? No. Protein popcorn. But it's funny because it's kind of the thing where it's like antioxidants where you could kind of just, I don't know, I actually haven't had the popcorn. It looks cute. But a lot of people can just say things and it's like, is it really enough that it's

helping people in a way? Yeah, protein popcorn. So what is the protein on that? I don't know. But the protein is a hot, a hot. right now. It's amazing how much when you're eating one of those things, you think like, wow, this tastes like candy, but it's good for me.

Well, I've always loved bars. Yes, you've always been a big fan. I've been a bar person for a long time. All right, well, we're going to go for one more to wrap it up. I'll give you an option. Okay, how about that? Mm-hmm. Or do we want to go for the third one that I think is the same guy?

Yeah, he's funny. He's on a roll. He's on a roll. Like, we hardly have any men on this, and now we're going to have three men. Same guy. He's two for two. We paid this guy. I don't know if I agree with him on this one, by the way.

Hi, this is Andrew. My wife, Jordan, listens to you guys a lot. That's our son. He's very vocal. Back into the issue at hand here. Bugging me, you say? Oh, let me tell you, if I'm driving on the interstate and I just happen to be in the left lane, not going slowly, I'm doing 85 miles an hour. and you pass me on the right side,

you're the problem. It's you. Pull over. Think about your life decisions. Thank you for listening, big fan. Who's passing people going 85 from the right side? Well, here's the thing is he's actually wrong in this situation. I understand he's right in that the person passing clearly wants to drive too fast.

However, he's wrong in that. the left lane is meant to be for passing and the fact that you're in it and somebody has to pass you on the inside means that you shouldn't have been in it because you weren't passing because if he can pass you on the inside it means that you didn't need to be over there

but he's saying I'm going fast enough that no one should want to pass me 100% that wait so you're saying people in the left lane you should just be there to pass people officially yes that is actually the way you're meant to drive to go right back into the right lane yeah like if you're for example like if you're on a two lane highway you can actually see the signs on the highway off it you know drive on the right pass in a left in america right i'm so confused i need

to restate we take my test because that's like i thought you just drive in either lane no no that's that's actually not the case so everyone that's how most people that's how most people do it everyone should be on the right lane is what you're saying well on a two lane highway you should be in the right on a three lane highway you're really supposed to be in the left when you're passing. Now, nobody uses that, right, which is totally fine. And what he's saying, on a moral level, he is correct. Yes. That nobody should want to pass him when he's doing 85. But actually, if somebody is trying to pass him when he's doing 85, he should, he should have actually gone into the middle lane. But the other guy is passing in the middle lane because there's

room for him to pass. So the other guy is thinking, why are you here? You should be over there. because I'm choosing to drive it 90 miles an hour. You know? So what I'm saying is that, of course he's correct, that the person that's passing him in the middle lane is insane. He is actually incorrect because he doesn't know that he shouldn't really be in the left lane. What stresses me out is all the people you see on the internet

are also on the road. Wow. You're sharing the road with trolls. You're sharing the road with this asshole. If you look at the chaos of the internet and you're like, well, that person's fucking stupid. because they are and then you're like

that's the same person that's like making decisions on the highway yeah well here's my problem with the internet in general

is that the top comment we talked about this before right the top comment on kind of everything is always the troll comment

which is something deliberate what do they call it rage bait rage bait post they're still after all the years of figuring out

that rewarding trolldom has caused abject pain in society. They are still rewarding the outrage stuff, the rage bait. They keep rewarding this shit. It's like so

deadly. And when you say they it's us. No, it's Facebook. It's no because they fucking allow it to go to the top. Oh, the algorithm yeah. They allow it to go to the top. They should be doing the opposite. They should see. The algorithm needs to pick up oh, this is rage bait and fucking put it right at the bottom. No, because they They want an engagement. They want money.

I know. Yeah. But what I'm saying is they shouldn't be allowed to do that. Yeah. Society's demise shouldn't be a thing that was caused by their desire for profit. But, period. By the way, I do have to disagree with what I said. I do think incels are probably good at driving cars because they, like, play video games a lot.

So I take back what I said. Yeah, but it's not just incels, though. It's a lot of Karens. It's a lot of people that just love complaining. Yeah. And they are, they, you know, back in the early Disney internet, you know, internet forums when I get sort of some success in Ireland and suddenly I saw these people talk a shit about me. And I was like, holy shit, what the fuck is this? It was. It was before people used to use the word trolls. They actually used to call them wind up merchants back in Ireland. Wums. Right. That's how early this was. And like, I always just thought that people would know that, you know, these people are dicks. But actually, they won. They won. Go on Twitter. Like all the tops ex-cic, I know that Elon Musk is rewarding them, but all the top X accounts, are all just like trolls, man. Like the trolls rule the internet.

Where to fucking... You know, if this was like a J... This is like a token novel. You know? Like, Frodo would lose. Frodo would fucking lose. I don't want to sound like an insult bringing up The Hobbit.

You did. All the girls... I know it's Lord of the Rings. Frodo's Lord of the Rings. Frodo's Lord of the Rings, right? Oh, yeah, Bilbo Baggins is The Hobbit. All the girls are lost. sorry. What's a good example

of a... Oh, give me a Harry Potter example. If this was Harry Potter, Harry would have lost. Voldemort would fucking have the most followers on X. Okay, this is an evolution of fashion that, like, has now just like

accepted, which I just don't get. I don't know when it happened, then I think it's Justin Bieber's fault. Oh. Hey, Hannah andaz. I tried to leave another voicemail. I'm not sure if you got it, but... Something that's booking me is that men think that they can go in public with their toes out because it's summer. No, men's toes are only a lot in public if it's like out of body of water.

Like you can maybe wear a flip flop or burgundy stock if you're like at the beach or at the lake or maybe like playing sand volleyball. Honestly, at the pool, that's probably it. Like at the bar, nope. Like absolutely not. You should not have your toes out, whether it's a sandal, whether it's a brink. can stock, whatever the case may be, you should be putting your toes away at all costs unless you're littered at a bodywother. Other than, yeah, toes can be out. But I'm tired to seeing men's toes out at the bar. Like, just because it's hot in Texas does not mean it gives

you the okay to wear fucking thong sandals to the bar. Okay, Jimmy, like, absolutely the fuck not. Like, please put on tennis shoe. Three things. One, not to defend Justin Bieber, but he's known for crooks and socks. and sandals. He doesn't show his toes. Well, that's what I mean. It used to actually be a faux pot to have socks and sandals on. But she's not mad about socks and sandals. She's not mad about

socks and sandals. She's mad about dogs out. Toes. I know. But what I'm saying is it used to be the opposite. It used to be like a weird dad joke if you wore socks and sandals. When I was in my 20s, if you wore socks and sandals or socks and slides, as they're called now, like you would be ridiculed. Now it's the opposite.

opposite. Now there's all this shame about men having their toes out. And the crazy thing is in Australia, it's really normal to wear, what do they call it? What are they called? Oh, tongs. They call flip-flops tongs. To wear tongs and jeans. It's like very normal. Yeah, it's all cultural. Maybe that's changed too. I wonder what this girl feels because she mentioned Texas. Would you rather guys at the barbu wearing cowboy boots? Well, she said wear a tennis shoe. Okay. I know, but I wonder would she prefer cowboy boots or dogs out? Where's all this thing with the, like, where did these things of like men's toes come from?

Like, where, because I see now it's become like a thing. I think it's... Because like, nobody's complaining about women having their toes out. People complain about me, having my dogs out in New York City before. Really? There's a, toes is a very controversial topic. Interesting.

And I guess people take it as like, it's too relaxed. I personally, I'll be honest, don't notice men's feet. Yeah. Never met a guy. Also, because, yeah, I just don't care about men's feet. It's not part of my day. Don't process it.

I mean, me. What's next? We have to wear gloves? What's next that people are going to be like, keep your finger. Why are your fingers out? What's next? Actually, I love that. Men aren't allowed to show their hands or feet.

Or actually, no, show me where your hands are at all times. Men need to. Men need to wear like high-vis gloves. Yeah, men need to just be, what's it called? What police put your hand behind your back? what arrested what what you talking about what's it called handcuffs yeah when they leave the house wait that's so funny what then you forgot handcuffs well i always forget words but men if they have to leave the house up to put their hands in handcuffs until they're proven like they're good that's great

Did you know there was some toe drama on my Instagram last week? Really? I posted a photo of me and you and you were wearing sandals and I forgot to cut them out. Sandals? It was when we were outside and you were wearing sandals with the outfit on July 4th weekend. Oh, if I posted it, I would have cut it out. I forgot to. Not really forgot.

I thought it was funny that I covered my feet and I didn't cover yours. I put like a blurring on my feet and not yours. And everyone had funny opinions about it. like some people were like why are you covering your feet and then some people were like why wouldn't you cover his feet? Yeah.

And it became a whole thing and you know what? But you know why? Do you know why? Because it was rage bait. I posted rage bait. Hannah. But also, first of all you know I'm not a fan of getting those posted in the first place

but I'm in my I was in my, on my deck. On my own deck. Yes. So. Yes. That was intrusive of me. I apologize.

No, but no, but I don't mean about the. intrusive part. I just mean like, I'm on my deck. I'm literally wearing fucking slippers. Babe, I have to say, you got nice toes. No, no, I need to cut them now. Some guys, I think, do have really fugly feet. No, I've always, my feet, let's face it, I got good legs and feet, you know? If I was, if I was like in the drag world, I would get a lot of jealousy from the other drag acts.

I'm not, but if I was, they'd be like, oh, God. Wish I had those legs. Guys wearing cowboy boots gives drag to me. Does it? What's what you're focused on cowboy boots? I'm sorry, have you ever gone to Texas and the men are just like wearing, pretending their cowboys, or they are cowboys, but it looks like they're pretending their cowboys. They have heels on.

Their, cowboy boots are healed. Yeah. And they have a pointed toe. Like that is trending right now for women. Oh, I never. And leather and a pattern. Like, it's fully like girls love cowgirl boots and then men are just wearing it. but they're like really, really, like, manly.

Fun fact about me. I don't like boots. I've tried to get boots before. You don't like boots. You don't like watches. You don't like jeans? You know, I don't like boots? Because it's just hard to get into and out of.

Well, as a, not to brag, as a wide calf girly, some boots, I'm just like, it's not happening. It's not happening. Or if I'm a little sweaty, I, like, can't get the boot up. And it takes, like, four people to get me into it. I don't want anything that's, like, hassle to get on and off. That's why I love Crocks. Yeah.

Shout out, Cross. which, by the way, every toddler is wearing, like, whenever I see a toddler, I go, I'm wearing Crocs, too. And this toddler yesterday was like, do you have gibbets? Yeah, I didn't know gibbets was a thing. And I was like, oh, I don't have gibbets on mine. They were like, making fun of me because I didn't have gibbets on mine. Yeah, loser. They were like, you don't have gibbets. Ew. Ew.

Oh, all right. Well, let's go. Wow, we went long. We always do. Well, thank you guys. Great, great prompts. We'll chuck a couple extra on. and, well, what do we got? Oh, West Hampton I got, August 14th. You got West Hampton. West Hampton sold out for me. The weekend before.

What else do we got? I added Carnegie Hall in New York, get your tickets, and check out. I added a bunch of additional shows, and I will be adding new places, but go to Hennepard.com to see if I'm coming to you. Are you going to Washington State? Soon.

Seattle or Tacoma? I haven't announced it yet. But it is coming? Everything is coming. it came in. It is coming. Don't worry, guys. It's coming. And I'm in Nashville. Speaking of Cowboys, I guess. I'm in Nashville in, uh, sometime in September or October maybe. I haven't actually, I got to put that up on my website, but it is on sale. Nashtown. Yeah, I'm, I'm in, wear your cowgirl boots. Yes. I'm in San Francisco, actually in September. That's the one.

I'm in San Francisco in September. Nashville and October. Full weekend in San Francisco. Vegas for a week at the end of Jan. Or at the, no, at the end of September. And, uh, I still think of, do you want to know that that's a clash between my old mind and my young mind? Because in my mind, the beginning of the year is September still because I still think in like academic years. Yeah. But I

was thinking at the beginning of the year and I said January. So that was the clash of the actual date versus the academic year clashing in my aging mind. And anyway, oh, and I'm back in Ireland in November. I haven't put them on my website yet because of

pure laziness, but they are on sale, Tala, Trim County Meath, and Balbriggan, County Dublin. Okay, everybody, like and subscribe, leave some Spotify comments. Thanks, bye. I'm a giggler and saw Hannah and Paige at Radio City. It was so good. Icons killing it, loving it. Okay.

What's bugging me is unsurprisingly, the men. I'm a single girl 29 in New York. So obviously the men are bugging me, but specifically the men are bugging me because on these freaking dating apps that are torture devices, the men get on here and they just want your phone number right away. And then you're like, okay, finally, twist my arm enough. I'm going to give you my phone number.

Maybe you want to ask me out. Maybe you want to make a plan. No. No, no. You end up on a Saturday night with these men texting you crazy shit. Like, I'm sad. Or pictures of their fucking calamari at dinner with their mom. Like, what the fuck do you want me to do with that?

I don't know you, Mike. Hi, Hannah and Des. So what's bugging me is? is men thinking that it's okay to approach women at a gym. Why do they think that's normal? We don't like that. We want to go in, work out, go out without talking to anyone. But why can't men respect that?

Well, I guess that's it. Thank you. Hey, Anna, this is Brianna. Something that's been really bothering me lately is I'm a target. worker um i have my bachelor degree in psychology so already i'm annoyed to be working there but recently we had to take time like on top of everything else we already do in the day to cut off the price tags of every single clothing item from underwear to boys shorts to women's dresses every single fucking item in our target you want to know why because of the president that we have

and tariffs and taxes and price changes. Disgusting that a million dollar company has to do that. But yeah, what are your thoughts on that? I know me as a customer, even walking through Walmart or anywhere else. If I don't see the fucking price tag, I'm most likely going to put it down. Also, I'm not prepared for people to be like, oh, so it's free? Like, shut up. Everything and everyone.

Thank you.