Berner Phone - Childhood Neglect

Episode Date: September 14, 2026

This week, Des decides whether or not the Dialers were neglected as children.   NEXT WEEK'S PROMPT: RELIGIOUS TRAUMA / GOING TO YOUR RELIGIOUS FRIEND'S HOUSE   Call [phone] to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can leave us a voice memo on WhatsApp: [phone]   FOLLOW DES: Tickets: https://punchup.live/desbishop Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desbishop Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/desbishop X: https://x.com/desbishop YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Desbishopcomedy TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@desbishop5   FOLLOW NICOLE: https://www.instagram.com/nicoleclyons/   Produced by Nicole Lyons Productions Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nicolelyonsproductions/ Website: www.nicolelyonsproductions.com

Hi, it's Hannah Burner. And Des Bishop. Thanks for calling the burner phone. If you leave a message after the tone, we may have to make it into a podcast. Hello, our little dials, and welcome back to Burner Phone. It's another episode. I'm very excited about today's episode, Nicole. How are you?

I'm excited too. Happy to be here, as always. Just as we start, did like a car with a really loud radio, just like passed by your window? Hello, everybody. Why can you hear everything? Welcome to Brerner. where we have the passing traffic of an insecure man passing by the window. It's so bad around here.

And we have like an intersection like traffic light directly outside of our apartment. So they get stuck. They're blasting the music for quite some time. But they have passed on at this point. I actually kind of like it. Funnly enough, since this is going to be a nostalgia episode. You know, when I went to Ireland, I, and I, and I, would come back to Queens then when I come back to flushing, I get so nostalgic for like being

able to hear car radios passing the window because it was more common in my Irish life than in boarding school life. The Irish life was just so different. So then the idea of like lying in bed trying to get to sleep and like hearing a car radio coming to the stop sign and then driving on, it was like, oh, back home. So I actually, I like when you can hear a bit of a like a car radio passing to the window. So this is not upsetting to me. It's nostalgic. Speaking of Ireland,

Chris is in Dublin today. So it was sending updates of him on the ferry. He immediately bought like a peekie blinders flat cap. It's funny how that's now Peaky Blinders. You know?

Back in my day. Yeah, back in my day. I fucking literally I know Tommy Shelby since 1995. Of course. Of course. of course, of course. But yeah, and then I told them, you got to go to the winding stair, Per Des.

You got to go get food. Did he book it? Stay tuned for the update. Oh, you think they can't just pull up? They have to make a reservation. I mean, we'll see. He's like very type B. He's kind of just like go with the flow sort of guy.

Well, we'll see what happens. Anyway, they're going to love Dublin. People, you know, other people, another friend of mine just got married. Hannah and I were actually at the wedding and then he texted me a couple days later to say that a couple of days in Ireland was part of their honeymoon and he was looking for like Dublin advice

but it's like it's very hard to give advice on like a city you know Are you like one of the main people Like you know how like Italy is Mateo Greece is Stavi Like are you like the Ireland guy that people are like I'm going to Ireland

Like where should I go? Is it really annoying? No it's not annoying It's just like especially these days, I'm just not as like on it, you know. But I, the entire country of Ireland, like, I will be able to give at least some advice. Totally. Like, I don't even have to put into GPS most places.

Really? Yeah, I just, I've covered, I've covered almost every inch. Like, almost every inch. Anyway, so what happened was we really don't have a lot of dialers with religious trauma. That's what we learned. That can't be true. Well, maybe we weren't clear. So we're going to skip this week of the religious trauma, but I want that prompt to still be alive.

So like, maybe is there a better way to phrase? It's basically just like fun, like religious childhood stories, really. Maybe that's a better way. Because I was like an alter. If you guys start telling me stuff about your religious childhood, like I'll have. So let's make it more like religious nostalgia, but, you know, some of the. like lighthearted trauma you can you can say also maybe we could also bulk in like maybe going to your friend's house like I feel like a lot of people went to their friends house and they had certain like

rituals or routines that were religious that they weren't familiar with or like I have some friends where they had to go to church like they slept over at a friend's house and they're like well we're going to church on Sunday so you have to come to church so maybe maybe that's another avenue where it's like if you directly don't have those experiences but you had to go to somebody's weird house, call in. That's a judgment, by the way. I had a weird house. Let's not forget.

Yeah, okay, that's, so what she said, okay? And, because it was surprisingly, it was surprisingly low. Because like some weeks when you say the prompt on the episode, like, they just start coming in, like hard and fast. Now, our episode did go out on Labor Day, so you're always going to, it's always a slower start when the episode goes out on a holiday, right? But even that aside, they just weren't coming in. And by the way, we're recording later in the week than normal. So, like, there's been plenty of time for the religious trauma stuff to come in. And it just hasn't come in. Now, there was a few,

but I decided to omit them from this episode. Silence them. Because the other, yesterday, Jonathan Haidt, who I quote a lot, you know, he's the guy that wrote The Anxious Generation, he posted a story of this woman in Virginia, I believe, who decided as a mother that her five-year-old son, who she had gone to the pond with numerous times before, in a gated community, this is the thing that's not clear, okay? In a gated community with 24-hour security, she decided that he would be okay to walk in his own because he wanted to collect some goose feathers, right? Obviously something he's into.

And she made a parental decision that at five years old, the type of child that he is, it would be okay for him to go. Now, it was approximately half a mile to the pond. A security guard saw him, called the police. And the mother was arrested and charged, I believe, or even possibly convicted. But listen, you guys can go to the facts. They're not that important because it's just insane. that the police even came.

And so she was charged with like some sort of like lack of diligence and neglect. I can't remember the exact actual charge. But needless to say, it was a misdemeanor, which could potentially give her jail time. Just for that parental decision she made for her own child at five. Now, people will have their opinions. This episode is not really about that, but it inspired me. Because obviously the joke I made on my Instagram was, every parent I knew, in my childhood would be in jail right now.

Like 100% that was accepted. What she has now been arrested for was acceptable parenting back in the day. Now I understand that we evolve with knowledge and things that were acceptable before become unacceptable. But at the same time, I still think that that is outlandish, number one. And I also think, and I am of the opinion of somebody that I just followed yesterday, you know what, I'm going to check their account because there's a free range parenting movement. And I'm of the opinion that neglectful parenting is not allowing your children to have the chance to learn how to age appropriately learn how to deal with things on their own, age appropriately.

I actually think that that's neglectful, right? The fact that this woman is arrested for what she did is insane because it's a gated community. And I get it, you know, the horrible, the McCanns, you know, like their daughter was kidnapped and people like, how could they leave her in the household? I get it. I get it. I understand that on one level you say it's a gated community, but that Portugal situation was also considered a semi-safe thing where the kid was around the corner and they went to dinner. And then that happened and that's horrific. And they've been judged for the rest of their lives on top of people saying that they killed, they actually killed the kids. But again, not going to get it to. But I get it. I 100% understand how. you will think that what this woman did was totally neglectful. I get it, you know, and something could have happened.

But I also think that we're not really, we're not gaining, because the kid went and came back safely, by the way. But anyway, I just want to, I just want to check these people that I followed. And I also don't have any kids, so I don't have to like, you know, I don't have to live by, it's called Let Grow, Let Grow org, this, this organization making childhood independence easy, normal, and legal. Because when adults step back, kids step up. So anyway, listen, I'm not, I am taking a position, obviously, but I don't want that,

I don't want the podcast to be about that. I decided that the prop should be, what neglect, what neglectful thing do you remember that your parents did to you in your childhood? And of course, obviously, the older you are, the more chance that this is going to rise up. But I've been quite surprised. It was actually like, you know, people growing up in the 2000s that sent, stuff in. So Nicole, you and I, I'm sure we can share some stuff. Let's not share until we let the dial us speak and then we can keep piping in with our various memories that come about. So

dealer's choice, Nicole, whichever one you want. Hey guys. My name's Jamie. I'm calling from Eugene, Oregon. I love both of you. The most neglectful thing my parents did was my dad was on his motorcycle and he went to like Taco Tuesday at a bar and then my mom drove with me there to go hang out and get tacos and they left me in the car reading Harry Potter which I was like

stoked about and it was probably like an hour or less like it wasn't that long but the cops came up to the car and found me and I was like oh my parents are just hanging outside you want me to go find them and they brought me into the bar and you know let them know that I couldn't be left alone in the car

in Tacoma, Washington by myself, reading Harry Potter. But the moment that police officer took me into that dive bar, I was like, this place is sick. And I get it. But my parents took me home, and it was no big deal. But something that today would not slide. Anyway, love you guys. Love the pod.

Think you're both hilarious and excited to see Des in Eugene, Oregon. Awesome. Nice plug. Accidental plug for Desh's show. shows. I'm on tour, by the way. Check out my website, desbishop.net tour dates or punchup live. Punchup.com.com.com slash

Desbishop for all my dates. But there was a lot on my Instagram, because I got a lot of messages on my Instagram from people about this. On my Instagram, there was a lot of my parents leaving us in the car. And 100% I was left in the car

all the time. That, by the way, is now Totally unacceptable. And I 100% accept that it's unacceptable, but I also accept that I never felt weird about it when it was happening with us, me and my brothers. I was the oldest, so my brothers were always younger.

And we were left in the car all the time. It's actually shocking how normal that was. Did you get left in the car? I did get left in the car. I don't think it was ever, I mean, a lot of times I was like I'd rather, like,

staying in there reading Harry Potter, that's goals. I mean, like, getting to stay in there and have a little activity and not have to go into, like, Sam's Club with my mom. But having to, like, there was one time I was in there, no windows down at all. And it was really, really hot. I don't know how old I was, but I was, like, for sure, like, locked. I remember I eventually, I, like, was like, okay, I'm bored. I took a nap.

I woke up. I was still in there. I was really hot. And I was like, okay, what's up? And, but then you get out and then the alarm goes off. and it's humiliating. And then your mom comes out and yells at you. So it's like, what are you supposed to do in that situation?

Just die? Just die. Just die. Because it's happened. That's what's so horrible. That's why I never speak up. It's happened. But I don't think it, it happened.

It happens like infants, you know? Yeah. I'm old enough to have remembered that. So I had to have been like between, I don't know, six and, nine? I'm not really sure. Like at what point are you like not scared to be left in the car? Yeah. I mean, we, yeah. I mean, no, a lot of times it was quick stuff, you know, I would never do that today. But I can totally understand why my parents were like, I'm just running in here for two seconds, like, stay in the car. So, but I'm glad that one has changed, particularly because of the, you know, there's been a couple horrible incidents, which is just,

But that, that, the incidents where people die is, that's like insane. You know, I think a lot of times that has to do with like people's state of minds being, being totally gone. But I think you get to a certain age, though, and you'd be happy to be left in the car reading Harry Potter, but I also get that it's like not safe. But they were, they were in a bar having tacos and drinking. So that's really like, that's, that is proper neglect. That is funny.

Like, I guess there was no babysitter option where it's like, we, really want to go to date night at Taco Tuesday, but you're going to have to stay in the car. But that's even funnier that they did bring her in because it's like, I guess maybe kids could have been allowed to go in. I don't know. But. Yeah, or they weren't. And then they, it's just nickel. It was just because it was cops.

I wonder how many like people between the age of sort of like nine and 14 were babysat by Harry Potter. It's basically like the readers. It's just like here, there's Harry Potter. Just don't move. Read. And then you disappear. How old were you when your parents started like leaving you at home? Um, 10 or 11 maybe?

Yeah, because like. Because I was the older sister. I have one younger brother. So at that point, it was like, Nicole. is the babysitter. Like, how do you feel about that? We had babysitters. I guess my mother went back to work.

I was like 12, head to 13. And like, at that stage then, it was like, we came home from school. I was 13, my brother was 11.

My other brother was 9. Like, we were coming home from school on our own. I was the oldest. No babysitter. Is that normal today? Or is that,

that's probably not, right? I don't really know. I mean, were you taking like a bus home? or how are you guys getting home by yourself too? Oh, man. There's ways to get home. So we won't even talk about that.

Well, because I feel like that's a piece of the puzzle. No, but we were walking to school without adults from a young age. Yeah. Like, I was walking to school with slightly older kids from a young age. But, like, I would have been six. These kids would have been like eight or nine. that's we were walking to school from a young age like that's just the way it was i feel like that's the thing that would maybe be less common like i feel like maybe if you're kind of young some parents

would be okay leaving you home alone but walking to and from school when you're young i feel like that's probably less of a thing uh we were walking we were we were we were walking i mean i walk to school on my own from a pretty young age i can't say the exact age because memory is so unreliable but we were young and we were walking to school. Like all those St. Kevin's kids, so many kids I grew up that have reached out to me recently because some of my bits from my latest special are very like about my childhood in Queens.

You can verify with any of these people. We were walking unaccompanied from a very young age. Like I would say the absolute, like latest was second grade. But I think we were walking from first grade. But, whoa. How far was the walk? Wait, this was in Queens that you were doing this, too? Every story that you will hear from me over the next 45 minutes are Queen's stories.

Whoa, well, that seems like spooky scary because it's the city. I was living in this, although it's really hard to say, like, if it's scarier, your risk of getting snatched is worse in the city or the suburbs. I feel like it would be the suburbs. Yeah, there was a girl, a similar age to me, kidnapped from Whitestone, Queen. in the early 80s. I forgot her name was like an Italian name. She was on the milk cartons and all that.

That was that time, you know. So there was like, that was the beginning of being concerned about being kidnapped. But there was, we were just told to, like, be careful. It wasn't like, you know, it wasn't. Anyway, that's just the way it was. So did they really, like, kind of change, like, your parents change their, like tune on anything when something like that would happen? Well, obviously not because we kept walking.

Just just, just walk. Yeah, we were just, it was just normal. Like that was just like, well, come on. Like, at the end of the day, it was a horrible thing. But it was like, you got to realize like, I guess, I guess the mentality back in those days was like this risks being taken every day. You got to understand, like it's a very different mentality back then, you know. So, listen, it was just normal.

like so many of us, so many of us walk to St. Kevin's, you know, and it wasn't that close. Like, we lived on 188th Street and 47th Avenue, and St. Kevin's was like 195th and 45th. So if you can work that out in terms of the amount of blocks and long blocks and short blocks, you know, you had to cross one quite busy street. That was it. Two, I guess. Howliss Court Boulevard and 47th Avenue, the way, it doesn't, I won't bore everybody, but there was two streets that were, like, dangerous-ish to cross,

but we were capable of crossing the road. And you had a group. You weren't by yourself. No, I don't think I started walking by myself until, like, later. But it definitely would have been, like, nine or ten. You know? Yeah, I definitely feel like my dad, like, my grandparents would have sent my dad to the store to get, like, cigarettes or something by himself, like running little errands by himself as a little kid.

I feel like I remember this story being told to me at some point. That's as common as anything for everybody of my generation. Can go get me a pack of Virginia's Simulites 100s? I went to M&R gift shop. It's gone now. I'm not getting anybody in trouble. I went to M&R gift shop at 46th Avenue in Utopia Parkway. And I got cigarettes my mother all the time.

Honestly. I completely forgot. That's like a five-year-old is like asking for cigarettes. I didn't even consider that part of it. All the time. In fact, it was less common to be left in the car for, for the two minutes it would have taken my mother to jump out and buy a pack of cigarettes.

She would stay in the car because she was double parked and I would run in and get cigarettes for my mom. Pack of marble lights for my father, packing Virginia Simm lights 100s for my mother. Both of them died from complications related to lung cancer, by the way. Just to remind people how fucking horrible smoking is.

But anyway, that was so normal. And on my Instagram, I got an inordinate amount. of fucking messages about being asked to go and buy cigarettes for the parents. That was totally normal. But there'll be many more

memories where that came from, so let's take some more. Hi, Des, it's Lenore. As you know, I grew up in the 70s. And I don't think my parents thought they were being neglectful because it was okay back then to just roam

the neighborhood with your friends. And we had dozens of kids, and every day I would go out to play and I wouldn't come back until I heard my father's whistle. And they had no idea what we were doing, like all day long, playing in the woods, playing in people's backyards, going in pools. And I'm talking about like when we were little, like elementary school. So, you know, I guess my generation of parents, you know, just kind of of we're different and, you know, maybe we know what we were doing and maybe think like, oh, my God, I don't want my kids doing that. So we, you know, we protected them more.

Do I think we need to go back to that and not call it neglectful? Probably. Anyhow, good topic. Bye. So that's my mother-in-law, Lenore. Shout out. She's messaged in before. Actually, we speak about this a lot, her and I, you know, just because like, I'm actually like, I'm in between Han and Lenore age-wise, you know? But the crazy thing is that Lenore's parents are both alive. She's talking about her parents.

They're both alive. I'm like, I'm just as friendly with the people she's talking about. It's crazy. I got no parents. She's got fucking Hannesillo's grandparents. I don't even have fucking grandparents, and it's not just an age gap thing. Just my parents died a bit young. But anyway, like, I grew up much more like the Lenore childhood than the childhood that Hannah has,

even though that Hannah would bring up like some stuff that they did. But also, they were in Parksville, Brooklyn, which, you know, times had changed, obviously also by the time she was growing up, but I do feel that it was, it felt more urban, even though it's quite fancy, but it felt more urban, feels more urban than where I grew up Eastern Queens was definitely a bit more suburban. Anyway, it is hard to believe, and I know we talk about this all the time, but I used to make a joke about how,

I think it was harder for my mother to be a woman when I was born in 1975, but it was definitely easier for my mother to be a mother because she wasn't with us, you know? And like, there has to be, there's a lot to be said for, like, I'm not saying it was easy to be a parent, but like it was easier, because we like Lenore is saying there we were outside like I just I just waited to like the

Saturday morning cartoons were over and then we went out and PJ Puma who will probably hear this so I didn't actually know that um Lenore's dad had a had a whistle because there various different neighborhoods have different people that use different things but PJ's mom Emily shout up she had a bell and she was that that house was the only one that had like an item everybody else was like so so the geococcus is because you know you grew up in like like diversity in queens was like different european nations and their immigrant parents you know so the geococcus's parents he was like nico elav oh yani elav oh which means come here like i can speak like i can speak get the fuck home in numerous languages and then but pj's mother had a bell

well. Anyway, and then you would come home, you know? And my mother would shout or like, my mother was more inclined to like send like some other kid, you know, because like the neighbor, we had two alleyways. So like our street was 188, PJ Street was 189. So we were, we didn't have to cross the street to get to each other, but we had two commuter drivers, which we called alleyways, and we played in one or the other. So if we were playing in PJ alleyway, which is also Shannon Dockney's alleyway, if we were playing in that alleyway, then, you know, my mother

wasn't, it was going to be a hard shout. So then she would, one of the younger kids, one of the younger kids that was playing in our alleyway, would become a fucking page. You know? It's like, send, I, say, and then come over like, your mom, your mom's looking for you. And then you'd have to come home.

And you'd like, run home. She's like, dinner's ready. And then you'd fucking, you'd eat that shit as fast as possible because you couldn't wait to get back to the game. Sometimes, like, sometimes you'd like, pause whatever game you were playing. I'm like, y'all, be back in 15 minutes

and fucking the most basic tasteless dinner from a fucking Irish American mom fucking like potatoes, fucking bit of meat and like frozen peas. And you'd like fucking scoff that shit and then you'd run back out. And we had no parents.

But like we weren't totally unsupervised in that like, you know, what is it? It takes a village. There was that village aspect of like all those different parents felt like various adults are checking in on this situation, like, but in an unorganized, like, unstructured way.

And by the way, I just want to point out that it completely worked. Like, nothing bad happened to any of these children. And there were, I'm not going to bore everybody by going through them. But I mean, you're talking like in that, in that little area, there, there was 30, minimum 30 kids between 18 and 2 in that period of time. Minimum, probably more. And I'm talking about not even a lot of houses. All these kids like playing together.

That's a very conservative estimate. And nothing bad happened. Did anybody ever get hurt? And you were like, oh, shit, we got to go get somebody? Yeah, but that can still happen. Like, that still happens. And we were doing crazy shit. Like, we had these roofs.

Sorry, so because it was communal alleyway, right, everybody had a garage. So the roofs of the garages, because it was separate to the houses, right? So it was the opposite side of the back door of my house. So then you could climb up a wall and get on the roof. And we just, we all played on these fucking roofs. And the parents would be like, don't be on the roof. Then we would just get low and we'd just keep low. And we'd fuck around on the roofs.

That was probably so fun, though, when you were like kind of hiding and you knew we weren't supposed to be up there. Yeah. Yeah, so fun. So fucking fun. What would you play up there? To hide. We'd fucking...

On the roof? Like, where is there to go? In the... This is like, this is true. Never mind. No, but like, there was like a gap between the 188th Street garages and the 189 street garages, which was like, at times quite cavernous. So you could like climb down one of the electricity poles and get down there.

And like sometimes you'd find like an old playboy and shit. You know, there's like a lot of just that type of stuff, you know. Totally. And then when I got older, God, we're getting way too much into the nostalgia. This is terrible. I'm admitting something bad here. But when I got older in my drinking days, but, you know, I stopped drinking at 19, so I wasn't that old. I was probably like 17.

I remember I got drunk in Woodside Queens. Woodside Queens, you could get, you could get fucking served at a bar like 16, you know. So I got drunk in Woodside Queens. and I got a taxi knowing well that I was going to fucking run on it. So I got the taxi to leave me off by the back entrance to one of the alleyways, knowing that I could run into the alleyway, hop a fence, get onto the roof, come out the other side. Like, it's just not a chance.

If you're not familiar with the neighborhood, you would know. So the innocent childhood fun then became more sinister, adolescent frivolity. So anyway, but all that happened. with the parents not watching us. And it was like, it was so fun. So I don't know. Oh, needless to say, we played a lot of sports on the street. That's another thing I feel like has to be gone, playing sports on the street.

Because who made fun of that? The car. What was that? What movie was that? Was that Wayne's World car? Oh, yeah, when they're playing hockey. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

That was very normal for us. Two-hand touch on. So we used to play two-hand touch on the street. street, but we used to play like self-hit, which was basically with a tennis ball in the, in the alley. But for some reason, two-hand touch football had to be on the street. So you had to keep walking, you know, you had to keep stepping to the side when cars were coming. But that was totally normal. And by the way, also unsupervised, just the way it was. Yeah.

So let's take another. Go ahead. Ask me a question. Well, I was going to ask if you ever came back after your curfew and got in trouble. Oh, well, yeah, in the drinking days? Forget about it. What about your, what about when you were not drinking? Like, I started drinking I was 12. Eight, eight, like, I don't know. Well, you know, because you only like the curfew.

When you were in middle school. The curfew only really started like when you were, like, wanted to start hanging out a bit more, you know. So I honestly didn't get in trouble until I was already drinking because I started drinking too young. I started drinking when I was 12. So that's, that was part of the problem. associate breaking curfew with drinking. When we started like hanging out a bit later and like had a curfew, we were like playing Ringelario, which is a great, there's a great like New York law about Ringelario and different neighborhoods had different rules and different ways to say it. But

Ringelario was basically like teenager hide and seek, broader area and it had like a, you get jailed and you could you could break people out of jail. But to get caught, that person had to grab you, and different neighborhoods at different things but you either had to say Ring a Larry or Runga Lario 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3 1, 1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, or like,

but you couldn't just get caught. You wouldn't just like, I got you. You had to be grabbed and you had to say whatever the sentence of your neighborhood was and then you were caught and then you were in jail. But somebody who hadn't been caught

who decides to come out of their hiding spot could try to break you guys out of jail. It was quite a serious, take ages. And then the oldest kid, obviously, always had some sick hiding spot you can never find. Did you have to run to a safe zone or something?

Like, how do you win? You just don't get found? Yeah, you just don't get found, basically. There was really no proper ending because eventually you'd just be like, yeah, well, eventually it's just like, okay, we can't find you. That's you funny. I never thought about that. I'm bored.

We're not going to find Des. I'm bored. I'm going home. Yeah, well, basically, like, once everybody's in jail, there's only one person left, just like, listen, everyone's in jail. Come on. Let's go. So anyway, so that, I never really broke curfew until my drinking days. And then, and then I broke curfew numerous times.

And I got caught for the first time when I was 14 when my parents went to a wedding. And I went to Joe Lane's basement, got inebriated. Because I knew they wouldn't be back to late. So I knew that I could get home before they got back. But I got so drunk, I blacked out. one of them whoever like carried me home one of the my my partners in crime but unfortunately i never made it up to the bed i passed out on the kitchen table and when my parents came home i was outlying on the table and my own puke and my father was someone denied my mother was like he's drunk my dad was

like no he's not his tummy hurts yeah that was mother's day eve 1990 just to give a sense of time and place and i still got up the next day and read at mass I did the reading at Mass Hulled over I had to walk This is 100% true I had to walk off the altar After the first reading

But before the prayers of the faithful I had to walk off the altar And puke and it came back out Is that like the worst place To be hung over A hundred percent I remember Mrs. Lala came up to me Mrs. Lala was my Filipino nurse

Or Filipino teacher from fifth grade She came up to me after she was like You read really well And I was like I wonder can she smell A fucking disaster that I am right now My shirt was so wrinkled, too, because my parents weren't there when I woke up. I woke up at 11.30.

It was 12 o'clock mass. I woke up at 11.30. I had to fucking jet. And you were an altar boy? No, I was a reader then. Oh, okay. Because I was going to say, like, altar boy outfit, probably worst outfit to throw up in church. No, altar boy, I couldn't do because during the, the bit where people kneel at mass, you know, the basically the consecration of the bread and the wine, it's the most important part of the mass.

It's in heavens we didn't have a kneeler for the altar boys You had to stand for that entire section quite long So I wouldn't I wouldn't survive the standing At that stage But I can still visualize having to walk off mid-mass and fucking puke And then come back out Where was the bathroom Like our church the bathroom is right in the front

So if you had to go everybody saw you go to the bathroom No so are you sneaky about it Well no because there's a there's a bathroom in the sacristy Yeah So there was a, there was a, there was doors on either side of the altar. And so the actual bathroom, I just snuck right out through the sacristy. You wouldn't have been that, it wouldn't have been, the VIP bathroom.

Wouldn't have been that noticed. Yeah. It's funny, I can still visualize like every fucking inch of that church. It's hilarious. So, uh, anyway, let's take some more. When we were kids, summer meant freedom. Literally the theme of this episode, no homework, no teachers, no school. And as adults, summer still means,

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I'm saying that younger millennials, so those around Canada's age, in my age, me recall our parents allowing us to do is just having unsettered access to the internet and social media right when it was really blowing up. So I recall my friends and I having, I guess, sleepovers, play dates, hanging out when we were preteens and doing chat roulette where you quite literally just went on a video. chat and ended up with some ramifications from anywhere across the world and could chat with them. Things such as humbler, Sanga, of course, MySpace, and then Facebook. There was even this one website, I think it was called Four and to Three, but don't quote me on that,

where people could anonymously submit essentially bullying comments about you. So you were openly asking people in your class or your social circle to make any sort of comments anonymously. It was wild. It was the wild west. And we were doing all of this in our little, you know, den. family room on the dial-up internet and Lord knows that our parents were doing

but as long as we were out of their hair they did not care yeah I mean that era was really before parents understood the power of the internet so they were probably thinking

oh this is great they're distracted with this new contraption having no idea But like being young and being in chat roulette, very dangerous. I actually never went on chat roulette, but I have a relation who went through like a chat roulette era. But it was in the context of like, they found it quite exciting because like random odd, like people would be looking to have like a quick sort of sexual titillation situation. and, you know, it just, like, it just couldn't have been healthy.

Did you ever use chat roulette? Yeah, for sure. I mean, it, like, it was, I think only one time me and my best friend from high school went on, and we made actual friends that we kept in touch with. Every other time, it's like, dick, click, dick, click. See a guy for one second, oh, the dick's not out, dick comes out, click. Like, it's, you think that you finally get a, click. away from it and then it's always like

this like put down the camera and then you're like fuck the dick was out the whole time and I couldn't even see it so yeah and we were children seeing that so you know that is illegal but I wonder if there was like a I can't remember but I wonder

if at the time there was like a you must be 18 type thing to get on here but you would just click yes or no you know what I mean? I don't even know if they had that. Yeah yeah I mean I'm, by the way, for the record, I am all for banning social media for anybody under 16.

I am like 100% behind that. Call me an old fogy, but this shit is just too powerful. Like, it's literally probably destroying humanity. So God knows, like, teenagers can't handle it. Like, it's too powerful. Yeah, and that the one thing she brought up Form Spring, that probably never came across your desk, but that one was like crazy fucked up because it was completely anonymous. you would have like a little account and then people would comment

what they thought about you and they would just say like terrible things because they could because it was anonymous but I'm 30 so like I'm the very last leg of millennials but so if dialer if you relate to this let me know but people would text in very specific styles so like certain people might do like

hey with two whys or like they would do like little cutesy things when they were typing where you're like oh I know my friend friend talks like this or my other friend talks like this. So you could kind of sniff out like, oh, I know that's my friend who's shitting on me. Yeah. So it was like, it was really crazy.

And I think like seeing that as a little kid, that's like, that was, I think, when I was in middle school when we were seeing that stuff. So that's, that's where the sleuthers come from. Mm-hmm. That's why the internet has become a bunch of people who think they're fucking private detectives. And we read into text so heavily where it's like, oh, you did a period. You hate me. Like, we really read into stuff like that. you know what I mean.

And then rate my teacher. That would cause a load of drama. Rate my teacher. Yeah, that was bad. Like that was, rate my teacher, people were writing crazy shit on there,

not thinking of like any, well, we also like prank called our teachers. Like we did crazy shit to our teachers where it's like, there's like actual consequences to, I mean, rate my teacher, people were not writing anything school related.

I don't know what your experience was. Well, I didn't, I, rate my teacher was, all, Honestly, all this stuff, I didn't have an email until I finished college. It's really for the best.

It's truly for the best. My first email was after college. I got a hot mail after college. And I didn't type a report for college until my dissertation, for my finding in dissertation in history. Everything else I hand wrote. Didn't have a computer. It didn't get a laptop until like a year or two out of college. Like just wasn't from that age.

But in fairness, we did have a computer at home. So, like, I was on the AOL chat rooms before I had an email. AIM. AIM. Yeah. No, well, that was, in semester. No, but what was the forums? Like, wasn't there?

What was it? I was on, like, some sort of AOL forum. I'm not familiar with the forums. That was before I had an email, though. That was like. You were chatting with randoms online? or what were you doing? Chatting with randoms online.

Just, yeah, chatting with, like, I remember, like, talking to some girl from California for, like, ages. But the best part is you just don't even know if it's a girl. That's kind of, like, the magical part. It's a magical part of the Internet. Yeah, but there was no, like, the skepticism that we have today just wasn't there. Of course. You know, it was just all trust.

Yeah, it was magical. Yeah, that was early forums. But, yeah, I just, that was funny because I would be on the Internet when I went home, but not at college, just because we had it in the house in Queens. And you had the family computer, like you didn't have your own

computer, yeah. Yeah, it was just the same. We were all using the same computer. But I guess, I'm saying that, I guess I had an AOL login. You know, it's funny, I have to figure that out about how I was getting into that. You know, because it was my mother's AOL, and I guess

I don't know, I guess I created, I guess I created an account on the forms. Or maybe I'm wrong on the timing. Maybe it was actually after I got an email, but I'm, like, you know, the, it was my mother's AOL account. By the way, my mother died with that fucking AOL email, just for the record. Like, her AOL email was in the fucking urn. It's like, she, she kept that AOL forever. There's still some AOLs out there, man. You know? Yeah, my grandma had was like, ride or die AOL email. Oh, yeah. Like, that's like, that's the internet. baby. I mean, do you remember when AOL bought?

Like, there was a period of time where like AOL bought some big company and I was like, wow, AOLs and then it all just fell apart. Shit, sure one out for the early pioneers of the internet. AOL, Yahoo, fucking whoever else. Yeah, but AOL was the one with all the great sounds, right? Like you've got mail and stuff. You've got mail. I mean, literally, fucking becomes one of the bigger rom-coms of the number. 90s. You've got mail. I used to love all those noises, but then it just became a spam fest. Yeah. Early internet, baby. Anyway, let's take some more.

Hey, Des. Hey, Nicole. Huge giggler, first time dialer. The calling in on the prompt of neglectful things, my parents let me do as a kid. I'm not sure this neglectful, but when I look back, it might have been dangerous. We grew up on five acres, and we had a pole barn where my mother as a semi-quarter, I would classify her. they saved everything, like every baby sled I had. Like I'm talking like you'd pull like a infant in. Any of my old like kid cars, things like that. So when we were in middle school, my girlfriends would come over and I had a four-wheeler

and we would tie anything we could find to the back of this four-wheeler and just rip it around the property. I mean, until the wheels fell off, until the bottom just gave out of anything. It was the most fun thing ever, and we started doing it in the snow and then realized we just loved it all the time, so we would do it in the fall, maybe even in the summer, who knows, but there was even a time I was driving the four-wheeler, ripping my girlfriend around on a sled, and I took this turn knowing it was going to be catastrophic, and I turned laughing as I turned, look back, and my girlfriend just barrel rolls across the lawn, and we are now 35 years old, and she still has a shoulder issue from that very incident.

So great times. Loved growing up in the 90s, early 2000s, and wouldn't take it back for anything. And so happy I didn't have helicopter parents. So love you guys. Can't wait to listen to the next episode. All right. Bye-bye.

Yeah, I mean, I loved all the risk-taking stuff. The thing is that actually a golf swing coach once quizzed me, and he said, when you're water skiing, when do you think you're going fastest? And, of course, I couldn't figure it out. Any idea? Nicole? When you're going fastest? Yeah, just, just that ain't curious.

I don't know. I'm not like a big water skier. I'm assuming this has something to do with you falling or something. No, it's to do with turning. So like it's when the boat is turning. So like he was basically making the point that like if you're looking for power and your swing, realize that you're the boat, you know, the end of the club face is the water skier. So all you have to do is turn and actually like physics will look after the rest.

And that's what this woman and her friends. injured shoulder learned is that when she went to turn, she was just creating an unbelievable amount of force. And God knows we used to love doing that shit when we were kids. We, did you guys skitch when it snowed? What's that? Grabbing onto the back of vehicles. Skitch? That's what we called it. This is a new one for me. No, um, I'm sure some people did with like a skateboard or something like that. But yeah, like Marty McFly and back to the future. Yeah. No, Yeah. And we didn't really do that. Yeah. So when it snowed in Queens, you know, you would go near like a stop sign or a red light.

And then like certain cars were particularly good for it. And you'd grab onto the back of the car and like slide until you had to let go. But you had to be careful like how busy the road was. But obviously people, the cars behind would see you. And they'd know that eventually there's going to be some kid fucking rolling out front of you. What was the good car criteria? Oh, like a UPS truck is the fucking ultimate. You know, like like like like a like a like a like a. pickup truck, like stuff like that was like fucking amazing. Um, you just needed something to grab onto, honestly. And like, so like, carwood hit stops on like three or four of you, but like some kids just wouldn't make it, you know, and you just try to hold on as long as possible. And it was the funnest shit ever.

But then I remember like an adulthood, like in my 20s, this is fucking embarrassing. In my 20s. Uh, not going to mention any names, but my first. cousin and his friend who his friend was like already in the construction game and he had a like a proper like Ford F150 or one of these like amazing four-wheel drive pickups we tied a rope to his pickup and we put on skis and we like skied through Queens during a blizzard so if anyone knows the neighbor I grew up in Orbondale Queens you know it's part of flushing over by the golf court over by casino park golf course and all the side streets around there,

we were literally fucking skiing around the neighbor, taking turns, and it was the most fucking, insanely dangerous stuff, and I'm an adult, by the way. But you see, you don't lose the lessons that you learn as a kid. Like,

it was so fucking fun. And it was like pure powder because this was like, this was like a real dump, you know? And there's no cars on the road because we could only drive on the road because it was a Ford F-150. And like,

was anybody shouting at us being like, hey, you guys are crazy? No, they were like, fucking go, bro! Oh, yo. It's fucking amazing. Anyway, happy memories there. Never forget it.

It's so fucking dangerous, though. When I think about it, like, God knows what we could have hit. When I think about it now with the injuries that I have, I don't know what we were thinking. But at the time, I thought it was the fucking, the most amazing thing ever. Well, skiing alone is a big trigger for you. Yeah. It's really scary to think about. Oh, God, that was so fun.

But, yeah, skitching was fun. So, you know, all the stuff, we did. So, funnily enough, to that golf course, when it snowed, there's a hill on that golf course. which in our neighborhood we would call suicide hill. So, like, here's, this is a perfect example of parenting in the 80s. Mom, I'm going, I'm going out my friends. Where are you going? Suicide Hill.

They're like, okay. Suicide Hill should have been a trigger word of like, I don't want you going there. Completely. Suicide Hill. So every, after a snowstorm, like whenever schools open back up again, there would always be a couple of kids in casts or like you know there was always injuries from suicide help because the older kids did insane shit and one of the insane things that anybody from my neighborhood will tell you about i'm sure there's other people that have done this in their neighborhoods they would be like the like the

the the the hood of a car somebody would have just the hood of a car like somehow and they would fucking slide that like people were sliding down on insane contraptions but it was so fucking fun, man. It was so fun. And like big massive tubes. And you had to get out of the way. So you're climbing back up and like all these people are fucking pumping down. It was so fun. The chaos of childhood. Like I just feel like kids don't experience that anymore. And yes, it was dangerous. But like the danger was worth it. That's what I think. That's the big question to the dialers today. Was it worth it? I mean, I, you know, because I made a joke in my previous special about like, like for all the happiness that's experienced.

there obviously I am aware that this level of haphazard upbringing some people got hurt like like probably some people got seriously hurt like to the point where you can't joke about it but it's like all that happiness and that it's like it's one of those odd questions that you have to ask and by the way I'm not saying that I know the answer to that but what I am saying is just like risk reward in this life because we do that with cars it's funny like we're very judgmental about risk reward in certain situations but not in others because we are taking that risk every day we get in our car like like it's quite a risk like I would you know so here's a question I who's an actuary out there who's like good with numbers who can say if over the last 40 years like the amount of like risk taking that children took in their childhood in terms of like like fun but risky fun the amount of injuries versus the amount of car trips that were taken and the and the injuries

that have happened there i i got to think you're going to have some pretty simple pretty pretty pretty comparable numbers to be honest with you so then the next question is what do we gain what do children gain from the risk taking and i'm not just talking about the fun i'm talking about problem solving, risk assessment, friendship, you know, just like, just so many things I think that you learn when you play with your friends unattended. What are you gained versus what are your risk? And by the way, again, I'm not saying I know the answer, but what I'm saying is that, you know, it's not as simple an answer as people think. And I get it. If you're a parent, you're not going to take the risk. I understand. I 100% understand. And I know that we don't do that anymore. And I'm not going to

take those risks. If Hannah and I have a kid, we're not going to take those risks. But what nobody wants to talk about is what's lost en masse. And that's the big question. I think that's with that company that I mentioned at the beginning talks about. What have we lost? And I think we've lost a lot. That's the truth. You know, I think we've lost a lot in terms of like our development as humans. Because this is the first generation that's been like that. Well, the last 30 years, particularly, like, that was the beginning of a massive change. As Jonathan Haidt likes to say, oversupervised outside, undersupervised online. I think the undersupervised online has been rectified, but I think your generation, Nicole.

You were of the generation where you were too young to be online and you were. Yeah, totally. I mean, the amount of my friends where it's like, yeah, we saw, like, beheading videos, just like things that you saw as a guy. kid where it's like, why were we seeing that? And like, it's stuff that you couldn't, as a parent, I'm sure you couldn't even imagine, especially if you're not like super tapped in with the internet. You wouldn't even know it would be possible for your kid to see that. Um, yeah, so, yeah, we were seeing, and even just in the sense of like, people were like, yeah, the internet is forever, but we still were kind of like, whatever, you know, like, I think that, so we were still

kind of like, you know, you could just make an account on anything of anyone. There's no verification process. You completely, like, make a fake profile or talk to certain people online. Like, there was a bunch of shit you could do and shit you could post that was like, yeah, whatever. Who cares? But lots of bad stuff out there, for sure. Let's take one or two more. I've done a lot of time.

I guess this is going to be a two-week episode because we have so many of these, and I think we've done like three. But I want to point out this is my favorite topic. Like, literally my favorite topic. Literally? Really? Hi, Dave. Hi, Nicole. The most Nicole X-well thing I think my parents did to me as a child was just literally let

me eat whatever I want. Like, thank God I didn't end up getting fat because they had no, and maybe that's why, they had no care for what I ate, when I wait, ate, how much I ate, just didn't lie. Yeah, I guess that's it. Part of me feels like that was a fake accent. What do you think? I mean, it was a pretty good one. So I don't want to offend you if it's 100% your accent.

But it just, it was just towards the end. I was like, I think she might be putting on an English accent. But it could be wrong. Would be hilarious. It also reminded me that, it also reminded me that I didn't check the WhatsApp. I tell you what we're going to do. Mystery WhatsApp. In a minute, not right now.

In a minute, we're going to do the. Mystery WhatsApp. We're going to do mystery WhatsApp. We haven't even checked because I don't get a transcript. Mystery WhatsApp coming up. Stay tuned to the end of the episode. It's about yesteryear. So anyway, I love this because I'm actually trying to work on some stand-up in my show about how we ate whatever the fuck we want and we didn't get fat. You know? Because I'm trying to write a joke about how. Do you know what Big League Chew is? Mm-hmm. Do you remember Big League Chee? Does it still exist? It does.

Does it? I actually just saw they, I think they might have made a new one with Aaron Judge. So they're like making Big League Chew with new players. Because like, so the funny thing about Big League Chew is it was created to simulate chewing tobacco. It's like, I want to be like these guys that are putting cancer in their mouths. Like a whole generation of these fucking baseball players have fucking oral cancer, right? from fucking chewing tobacco.

But we were like, one day, I'm going to be like that. But for now I'm putting bigly chewed. But like, so the whole thing was like, you put a whole fucking bag in your mouth. We would put a whole bag of the shit in our mouth. It was so good. And Lucky Char. And we just ate so much shit. And we never got fat.

And then people say, like some nutritionists argue that it's not, it's very easy to blame the sedentary lifestyle for why we have an obesity crisis. But it's more than that. But it's just like, it's hard. And I get it. People are going to say, oh, it's ultra-processing. Like, all that, people are going to say what it is. Everyone's got their opinion on what it is, right? But some of it has to be the sedentary lifestyle because none of us got fat.

None of us. Yes. And I think that, like, my house food was much more controlled. And we had, like, everything in the closet or the pantry was, like, fat-free, sugar-free. Like, I was aware of that from a very young age. and like we weren't eating fast food very often. So I think that it gave me more food problems rather than being just allowed to eat whatever I wanted as a kid. Because now I feel like those things have kind of like stuck with me.

And now I'm like eating McDonald's all the time because now I'm an adult. So I'm like, well, I can just eat McDonald's again today. But, you know, not having that as a kid, I feel like that kind of, it went the opposite direction where now I have like weird control problems. with food. Like, I think it's kind of the move to let your kid eat whatever they want. Right. It's hard to know because it's so personal, right? I think I said this before, but we were a Burger King family. Did I tell you that? My mother just, my mother, like, for some reason, she had like a thing with McDonald's. My mother had this. My mother loved the underdog in every situation. Oh, we have talked about this. Anyway, but we, we ate,

we ate a reasonable amount of fast food. I would say the amount of fast food that we ate was like in conjunction with today's beliefs. and the amount of fast food you should have. Like it was definitely more like a treat. Wasn't that common. But like we ate so much ice cream. Like there was always ice cream in the house. We ate it every morning like because morning.

Yeah, because still to this day. Oh, you snuck the ice cream. No, because we woke up early. We're early risers. Yeah, people would always be like, that's because you're old. I'm like, no, because it was in the fucking 80s because I was eating fucking turkey hill. Or to me as well, bombs, fucking no frills ice cream. And I told you about the bottom of the,

I've ever told you about the bottom of the ice cream? I don't know. So, like, myself, my two brothers, we'd wake up early and it was like, we'd be sneaking ice cream because we weren't supposed to eat it, right? So we'd be sneaking ice cream. But if one of my brothers went to the bottom, I'd be like, bro, you fuck it. Now they're going to know.

You couldn't. So I would like, I would try to like cover the hole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. Of course my mother always knew, but what are you going to do? We ate the ice cream every morning. They didn't want to wake up early enough to stop us eating the ice cream. my dad eats ice cream even out of the gallon like totally flat like flatt me too he yeah so that my dad childhood so my brother was like one time ate a shit ton of ice cream but like tried to frame my dad by

flattening the top because that's just the way that my dad eats it and my mom was like jimmy like you ate all that ice cream he was like no i did and it wasn't me and then eventually got exposed that it was my brother but he was like i know this my dad leaves it like this so i'm I'm going to make it flat. A little sneaky trick. So that's funny that you've just reminded me that I do that still to this day because of the way we had to eat it in the morning. I bet you your dad is the same reason.

Sneaking the ice cream. Yeah, because you just learn that like you want to keep it flat and like not make it obvious. Yeah, it seems like less has been eaten that way for some reason, like when you're eating it flat versus getting a big divot out of part of it. I got to say something and maybe you guys. correct me on this, but I feel like it used to be a lot easier to get

vanilla fudge swirl in this life. I feel like vanilla fudge swirl as a flavor has like gone down in popularity. Is that your favorite? No, but there was just like, sometimes I'm in the mood for just that. I was a chocolate guy growing up, you know? A much broader flavor palette these days.

But like sometimes I used to really like, because vanilla fudge swore was always a pot luck, right? sometimes get a really good section and sometimes it would basically be vanilla, right? But every now and then you'd hit that mother load like a big ass fucking fudge section. You'd be like, yeah, bro. You ever get the Ben and Jerry's core pints? I feel like you'd be into that because they have a whole middle section. That's all like fudge or some type of flavor.

So you always get the mother. Right. Yeah, I'm a big, in adulthood, I became a big fan of that. Cherry Garcia, actually. Yeah. I wasn't into that as a kid. I wasn't into like the cherry. But anyway, let's not get, I could do a whole episode on an ice cream. I even recently had like ice cream with like spice in it.

Spice? Yeah, it was like a chocolate. It was like a chocolate. Like chili? Yeah, but what's the word? What's the word for that like Mexican, but like I feel it more like like Southwest American spice? The fuck. The name has just gone out of my head

But it was that It was that It was hot But it was chocolate So you'd bite it That's nice And then all of a sudden You get like

Hello But it was fun It was an interesting sensation All right I'm very open-minded About ice cream flavors these days But sometimes I feel like They fuck with them too much

It's like there's a reason why The basic flavors are popular Yeah That sounds pretty heavily fucked with Spicy ice cream Yeah It was good though Yeah.

Anyway, let's let's not get bogged down in that. Because it's time for mystery WhatsApp. Mystery WhatsApp. Because I forgot. I just was there because when I heard the accent, I was like, fuck, I never checked the WhatsApp because I didn't. So it's a lot of, it's a big risk here. What do we think?

Hey, before we check the mystery WhatsApp, can you check what country code is plus, plus five, four? Not going to read out the number, but plus five, four. What's the country code for the mystery WhatsApp? It's Argentina. Okay, great. Well, we're getting a mystery. What's that from Argentina, potentially?

Hi, does it, Nicole. I'm calling in about the most neglectful thing that our parents let us do. And mine is that my parents would let us go play in a field full of power lines and towers, essentially. So I lived in like a dead end street. And if you crawled through the bushes at the end of the street, you entered this huge field full of electricity towers and everything. was like gated off things like that and as kids we used to just crawl through the bushes and play in that field all day like all by the towers and all the whole generators and whatever else is in that fields and I feel like that's insane imagine nowadays like cops would come up and be like hey what are

you kids doing playing by these power lines my parents would fully go to jail but here I am still alive was never electrocuted. So that is pretty crazy when you think about it besides all the other things, letting us run around. Like, my sister was shot by a BB gun from some random kids, because we're all just running around, doing

nothing all day. So anyway, good times. By the way, I just realized that on the WhatsApp, it literally says phone number from Argentina. So, duh. So that was our mystery WhatsApp of the day. By the way, our WhatsApp number is actually a mint mobile number.

number. So Mint Mobile, common sponsor the podcast. Anyway, um, so, uh, yeah, it's interesting because like, I remember the moment where suddenly people were like power lines are dangerous. You know, there was like, I, I, I, we never worried about power lines. And then suddenly it was like, being near power lines is bad. You know? Yeah. I didn't really like encounter a whole lot. Like, we definitely played in the woods all, like all the time. But we weren't really encountering power lines. Well, there was one area behind Minnaol the pool club where you would hop the fence and then go down into this like ditch area. And there was like some quite big power lines there. But I just remember there was a time

where suddenly people were like, oh, it emits, you know, like it's not good for your, your body. Oh, really? I don't think I ever heard that. So it's not like touching it and getting electrocuted. It's like you're absorbing 5G or something like that. Yeah, something like that. Interesting. But I feel like they weren't actually. I think playing their parallel is actually not dangerous. I don't actually think it's dangerous. Is it? No, I mean, the shooting with the BB gun really was more of the red flag in the story.

That was so normal for us. I remember, I don't think he listens, but because I saw him last year and he were reminiscing about the fact that this friend of mine, funny enough, we're on a roof, right? On a roof. I had no shirt on because it was like the summer in Queens. It seems quite uncouth now, but it was just totally normal. us savages and he shot me almost point blank with a paint gun oh oh it was so sore i had such a welt like an insane welt but then did you think it was like cool as a kid that you had

that no i was pissed off man fucking sore man oh my god it was so sure you in the chest the back in the back oh you weren't even looking i wasn't even looking yeah it was that was fucking sore i have to say in his defense I don't think he understood how powerful those things are you know but can I say I have another friend who listens to this podcast who like don't ask me why just like joking around one day I like held a lighter up to a um a wire hanger you know for like a while you're like brand him I put it on his skin I had no idea I had no idea the level of like burn and pain this would cause. And by the way, he can show you that mark to this day.

Like, it's so fucked up really. Yeah. Kids are so stupid, man. Did you let him do it back to you? No, fuck. No, that's just life, bro. This kid gave me so many, he was a year older than me. I scored this man for his entire life.

He's a year older than me. He gave me so many beat dads later in life. Sorry, earlier in life that like, it's my one tiny bit of revenge. Anyway, he'll get a kick out of it. They keep being mentioned. So, anyway, that was our mystery WhatsApp. I think we should do another week of this. Let us know in the Spotify comments or, you know, send us in more.

We'll do another week of this or some religious stuff like we mentioned. We've got a lot. Let's build it up. Let's build up a tank of stuff. This is like my favorite topic. There was so many more still to go. So many more topics to discuss. Also, your opinions on if you think it was right that this woman was arrested.

you know, just all your opinions on these things. You know, don't be afraid to disagree, you know? I'm not saying I'm right. Just giving my thoughts. And what else do we have? We got a rumor related to last week. Did you want to hear that? Oh, yeah, let's finish.

Let's, it's, it's kind of, it's kind of last week related. We might as well. But don't forget, it's 9-17-5-1-2-17-8. And on the, if you want to be a mystery WhatsApp, It's 6464-2-3-3-0-200. That's a plus 1. 64-6-4-2-3-0-2-0-0 or 9-1-17-5-8. And for some reason, Nicole always finds it funny when I read out the number.

He just locks in so aggressively. 9-1-175-1-2-17-8 because it's like the job I always thought I was going to have. It's just not enough radio. So, all right, let's finish it off. Long episode. Let's finish it off with... something that was related to last week. I can't exactly remember what.

Hi, Des. Hi, Nicole. I'm listening to this week's episode, and I just had to call in because I feel like it ties in so perfectly with like the high school rumors and like celebrity rumors stuff. And I talk about this often now in my adult age. But I don't know what it was, that there was always a rumor and always a girl every grade

that like got spread about something involving the girl, peanut butter. the dog and I'll just leave it at that and it's like every grade like schools in the surrounding area like this was like just such a common rumor that happened like every year to like one victim and like obviously not true and I just don't understand how that happened or like why that happened and um yeah the poor the poor have gave peanut butter to her dogs so weird all right thanks love the pod Love you guys. Bye.

Such a good observation. That was like, even in Ireland, there's always the peanut butter, dog, you know, licking story. It was always girls, though? That's so sad. I feel like there was, I definitely think there was some guy ones, too. We had a guy fuck a dog. And vacuum, vacuum blowjob rumors. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

rumor, but it was like, to the point where people like, oh, I have like a video of it. I'm like, I'm good. I don't want to see. I don't want to see Kyle. Fuck his dog. But thanks. Now I have to go to my sixth grade gym class. Is Kyle your like, your generic name for this, these stories?

No. It's actually a Kyle. Boy, Kyle just got outed. Yeah, but I'm from upstate New York. So 50% of our class was Kyle. So no worries. Or Corey. Cody.

Brendan. Well, Brendan is an Irish name. So Brendan, I can. But to me, Corey, Kyle, and Cody are like very American names. Brendan, though, to me is very Irish. What about Brandon? Brandon is American to me. Brandon, but Brendan is Irish.

Brendan is Irish. St. Brendan. You know, some Irish believe St. Brendan discovered America. I haven't heard of saying Oh, Jesus, you're Listen, you don't know the fucking saints

That's the fucking part of the problem Do you know about St. Maliki, do you? Whoa. Can you say it without an accent? There's a St. Maliki's up in the Bronx Just for the record. Just so you know. What?

It's a church, a school. I'm unfamiliar. And a G-A-18. So, anyway, let's get out of here. It's a great episode. fun great episode don't forget spread the word about the pod um as we head into the autumn as we head into the the beginning of the year as far as i'm concerned you know the the academic year is really the beginning of the year i don't know why we're trying to pretend that january 1st is the beginning

of the year after labor day is when the year begins everybody uh so new academic year new time to spread the word about the pod we're all settled into our new format um will uh We'll see you in the Spotify comments. We'll see you in the Google voice number. We'll see you on the WhatsApp. Or if you're an Apple podcast listener, don't be afraid to like, subscribe, review, all that stuff. I don't look at the Apple reviews,

but I'm sure there was some negativity during the changeover period. So, you know, freshing up some reviews with people that are here in the modern era. And we'll talk to you guys next week. so much.