Berner Phone - Creative Insults & More Things We Believed As Kids

Episode Date: July 6, 2026

Today Des listens to your creative insults and some more things you believed as kids.   Call [phone] to leave us a voicemail! International Dialers can leave us a voice memo on WhatsApp: [phone]   FOLLOW DES: Tickets: https://punchup.live/desbishop Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desbishop Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/desbishop X: https://x.com/desbishop YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Desbishopcomedy TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@desbishop5   FOLLOW NICOLE: https://www.instagram.com/nicoleclyons/   Produced by Nicole Lyons Productions Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nicolelyonsproductions/ Website: www.nicolelyonsproductions.com

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And Des Bishop. Thanks for calling the burner phone. If you leave a message after the tone, we may have to make it into a podcast. Hello, our little dialers, and welcome to the Burner Phone podcast. It's funny that you, Nicole, you started the episode with a gentle clink of ice cubes. which coincidentally not this morning Hannah had like a large ice coffee from Starbucks and as the lower the the lower the coffee itself got the more the ice was crashing to the bottom of the cup and with

every crash of the ice back to the bottom of the cup I realized that this is also something that kills me. The sound of does that bother you the sound of ice crashing back to the bottom of the cup? It doesn't really, but I really apologize. I have, I'm still adapting to your tendencies. No, but actually, no, but the gentle, yours was like a, you, yours was like a, it was almost like the beginning of a speech. It was a, it was like a high pitched, you know, but, um, you know, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, really think we're going to have to do sounds that annoy you episode. In fact, I'm calling it

right now, sounds that annoy you episode for next week, you know? It's a running theme. I'm getting people messaging me. I got a message on WhatsApp about the people that leave the clicking on the text on and how that drives them insane. So I'm going to save that for next week. Next week's episode sounds that really annoy you, you know? I love that idea. Um, but this is the thing about the, it's great. Whatever about whether plastic straws were really the problem or not, which, you know, originally, you know, it was clear that it was like bad for the turtles, but then there was that documentary on Netflix.

You remember that documentary? Um, what was it? I can't remember, but it was basically, the documentary was basically saying that, like, the fishing industry was funding all this, trying to blame us for like plastics in the ocean, when in actual fact, the main contributed to plastics in the ocean is big fishing. Now, I've never gone and tried to look up who's wrong and who's right in this. But basically, after the documentary, everybody was like, we're drinking from, like, paper straws that are not really holding up

because to try to protect the fishing industry. Right. So actually, we were a product of fishing industry propaganda, trying to blame us for the plastics in the ocean. Now, I don't know if the documentary, Netflix was actually propaganda from the plastics. I don't really know. You know, you can't trust anybody these days.

But needless to say, one of the evolutions from the non-plastic straw era was Starbucks and then everybody else, including the fancy coffee shops, started doing the plastic cover with the hole. The sippy cup. Yeah, which I'm actually a fan of the sippy cup. But the problem that the sippy cup is, as you get further down the drink. the ice, it gets a bit crashy. And it annoys me when I hear it, but also because it annoys me when I hear it, when I'm the provider of the noise, when I'm drinking the coffee, I then am really paranoid, you know, that I'm making somebody else unhappy. So this is the, this is the other thing that people don't realize about when you're like annoyed by noises, is it also makes you

paranoid about all the noises you make yourself. Like when I get a message, when I get a message about that like somebody messaged me a couple of months ago saying, when you breathe in on the mic, I can hear your spit. And I was horrified. I mean, like, that's worse than like being canceled for me, you know? It's like that thing you said is the most offensive thing ever. Okay. I, I'm learning and I'm growing. but you breathed in and I could hear the spit in your mouth. I'm horrified that I've done that. So that's also part of the problem with all this noise sound stuff.

But anyway, welcome to the episode. Speaking of wonderful noises, everybody, there's a heat wave in New York City. And so the air conditioners are in full flow. But one of the benefits of this episode is that there's a bird nesting on Nicole's air conditioner. And I don't know if you guys noticed already, but there is a beautiful accompaniment. This is like the Masters.

This episode is like the Masters Golf Tournament because we're piping in. Can you hear them? They're actually quite nice. I always try to cut it out because it happens literally every single time. So if you haven't, maybe it is peaceful. Maybe I should leave it in. Do you all like the bird sounds? Okay.

So now just because you're aware, are you, you're aware? of the lore, the lore of the Merlin Bird app, right? You've been brought into that, right? Yes. Do you have the Merlin Bird app? I don't. I guess I have to get it. Oh, because I need to know right now.

I feel like, I want you, I need you to Merlin it right now. They're those little brown birds, what is it, like a sparrow or something? They're like the little tiny brown birds you see everywhere. Oh, right. Okay. I guess it's a sparrow or Robin? I don't know. It's a sparrow.

Are Robin, I thought Robbins, are they like exclusively, what are they like black with a little chest? I'm just, I'm into, I'm into the singing. Oh, right, of course. Yeah, those little tiny brown birds. Okay. Well, if somebody wants to try with the pod on to Merlin Bird app, the sound effects that we're getting to this episode, it could to know. But we're betting on a sparrow.

if we can get some, what is it, ornithologists, the message in to say what you're here. Well, are you going to download the Merlin Bread up right now? Yes, but I'm also going to show you a picture. I think it is a sparrow because it's just those little, boy, I'll tell you one thing. If we had any Hannah fans left on this pod, they are exiting right now.

Oh, that's what you think is outside? Yeah, I think it's just these little guys. Little sparrow. teeny tiny little brown bird with little teeny tiny feet. Have we ever discussed how unfair the discrimination against pigeons is? Have we ever discussed this? I love pigeons. I love pigeons too. And like, so the fact that you show me this little brown sprout, there's sparrows everywhere

too, but nobody's like fucking sparrows suck, you know, but everyone loves to hate on pigeons and rats, to be honest with you. I love rats too. I had pet rats. Yeah, I'm just like, listen, I don't want, I don't want rats everywhere. Don't get me wrong. I'm not, I'm not, but like, I don't, I just don't think they deserve to hate. They're really lovely.

Like rats that, I mean, that you invite into your home, like pet rats are actually the best ever, and we can save this for another day because I have so many good things to say about them. But if they came into my home uninvited, I definitely would be bummed. I wouldn't like that at all. Yeah, yeah, I want to like, you're like a vampire. You need to be invited into the house. Yes, 100%. But, yeah, I just feel like their own.

fairly maligned. I know that historically they've had some issues around, but like there's just loads of animals that have, you know, cause like dirtiness in our, in our humanity that don't get the hate that rats get, you know? So I, about when it comes to pigeons, someone made fun of me for asking this recently, but I'm just wondering, like, where they go to sleep at night. Do you have any idea about this? These are the, listen, we need our ornithologists to kick in here. Well, Google it. Have you never Googled it? Is that one of the... We're just trying to start conversation here.

We'll Google it then. No, but do you ever end up in these situations where you're like in a conversation and you're like, oh, I must Google that? And then later in the day, you're like, what did I say I wanted to Google? And you can't remember. Yeah. And then that can go on for like ages. Ages and ages.

But it says they sleep on elevated, sheltered structures, like building ledges, rooftops, bridges and trees. Do you ever see them, though? Like, where do they go at night? They kind of, I definitely can, I think I have seen, like, areas where there's. At night? I have to say, I haven't been paying attention either, you know? I haven't been like.

Well, now, now one night I'm going to be walking and I'm going to be like, what was I supposed to do? Oh, yeah. Try to find all these pigeons. Yeah, I mean, I've definitely heard them all, like, bunched up, like, cooing, you know? That's what pigeons do, right? They coo? Why is that funny? I'm just laughing at bunched up, I guess.

They do bunch up. They bunch up and they coo. They do. Yeah. They coo more than an unstable African nation. What? Is that too political? No, I like that.

Hannah hates a pun, as we all know. So, anyway, here we are. So today's prompt was going to be just like creative insults because Hannah had actually sent me a picture of a TikTok of, hey, just send me creative insults. I'm looking to expand my vocabulary, which I thought was quite funny. So I posted it yesterday. But, you know, I, you know what it is? I feel like the dialers are like, they're quite positive. You know, I don't know if they, I don't know if they embraced it.

But what I did find was we got so many things from last week after the episode about things that you believed as a kid that were basically going to have a follow-on of things that you believed as a kid plus some insults that came in. And I'm pretty sure now I'm starting to notice a pattern. I'm pretty sure we're going to get a lot of insults in for next week, which I like. But also, don't forget, if you want to call you. And it's 9-1-17-5-1-2-17-8-6-4-6-4-2-3-0-2-0-2-0-2. Plus 1, that is, plus 1-6-4-6-4-2-3-0-2. If you're messaging from outside the United States, you can hit us up on the WhatsApp.

So, anyway, let's start with a follow-up about the car batteries. Remember we mentioned the car battery? And I was very haphazard with my discussion. We've had somebody message in about it. Hey, does. just calling in because I have a pretty funny car battery guy story. When you started talking about, you know, idling the car, draining the battery, kind of reminded me of one time I was talking to this guy and he picked me up.

We grabbed coffee and we ended up just like chilling in his car like in the parking lot of the coffee shop, just like talking and whatever. And I guess he had left his car on. I think like the music was playing. I don't know. The car wasn't, like, running, but, like, the lights were on, the radio was on or whatever it was. I was there for a few hours, and then, you know, when he was ready to, like, go and he wanted to literally take me home, his car just, like, wouldn't start. And I felt really, really bad because I could tell, like, he just, like, didn't know what to do.

To say the least, I don't think he was as much of a car guy, so he had no idea what happened. he ended up calling one of his best friends to come jumpstart the car and like it like worked but it like kind of messed up his car it was like really bad so that his friend like drove me home like he waited with the car it was yeah it was it was pretty funny i felt really really bad because it was like a little embarrassing for him but yeah it was definitely like a fun story and we laughed about it after but yeah so yeah do you do you do you do you do you do not leave your car running with the radio lights on whatever for more than like an hour or two because yeah it it will die but you know when i was saying it last week i was saying it in the

sense of like i have immediate anxiety about it like 10 minutes and i'm going to screw my battery but this is so funny because like i just go back to like the mind of the young man and you're like trying to hang out in the car with some girl and you're like fuck my battery like i don't care how long this takes like hopefully i can seal the deal here he's like he's probably like being shy in the car afraid to make his move and he was he he didn't make his move fast enough and he fucking ran out of battery in his car what would have really been an amazing end to that story is if she was like and now i'm married to the guy that picked me up i'm married to the guy that jumpstarted the car by the way i'm 50 years old

and i've i have had to jump my car or i've had to like give my friend a jump in my life. But no matter how many times I do it and YouTube videos that I've watched, every time I do it, I think I'm going to blow. I think I'm going to electrocute myself. I don't know why I consider it to be like one of the scariest things of all time. And I feel like that's something that was put into my head when I was younger. Something was put into my head when I was younger that you can really fuck up when you're jumping the car. And it's one of the things I'm afraid of the most jump-starting the car. Have you ever had to jump a car?

Well, one time my boyfriend used to live in Boston, and I was visiting him, and I think we were going to maybe drive to go see his family in New Hampshire, something, and the car was dead. He had a Nissan Ultima that was so old that would constantly die unprompted. And one of the neighbors came over to help jump the car. And the way he was hooking it up. was, I think, the way that you would get electrocuted. Like, it was back, something was backwards. Like, I think you're not supposed to connect certain ones and that's the.

Yes. And Chris, my boyfriend was like, hey, like, I think it's like maybe supposed to go the other way. And the guy said, everybody different. And that was his response was everybody different. And we were like, I don't think so. Like, I don't think of this particular thing, everybody different. And thankfully, he didn't get electrocuted. But we were like, and it was like an old man.

Like we're like, this guy's going to die in front of us. But he saved us. I think we still had to call AAA, though. What I envy is his relaxation around the process. I know. No, I've never done it without. I mean, I definitely had to jump a car before the internet in my life. But in my adult life, I have never not consulted the internet, double-checked,

before jumping the car, you know, unless I end up in one of those situations where, my battery's fucked for like a short period of time you've had to do it numerous times then you're like then you're like a pro but then it doesn't happen for like five years and then you've totally forgotten and i know it's to do with the plus and the minus but either way the ground the ground electricians love talk about finding a ground i'm like still to this i'm having a fucking clue like so i you know that that'd be another it's not a good prompt because i don't think it's broad enough but like what of the what are the things still to this day that you're like irrationally afraid of, you know?

Yeah. Like, I feel like we just talked about this recently too. Did we talk about things that were like irrationally like. No, like this came up between you and I. I'm trying to think like you were saying you were afraid of something. Yeah. I mean, I'm still like when we were in the mini all the pool club when we were kids,

if there was, if there was lightning obviously you had to get out of the pool. But then there was like, it was like you had to wait like a half out. There was like an amount of time you had to wait before you guys could get back in the pool. Whereas in my adulthood, I haven't been as afraid of lightning, I have to say. I haven't held on to that as much. I'm trying to think. I'll come up with some.

That's not the prompt for next week, but if you think of one, you know, that you never let go of. I know that I have other ones. I just can't think of them. Well, when we were just on vacation, my boyfriend was very adamant about if we, like, eight that we couldn't go swimming for like 30 minutes or something. That's debunked, bro. Yeah, I was like, we're going to be okay. Like, we're adults.

Even if you get a cramp or something, it's like, we're going to be all right. Yeah. So it's funny that he's still, yeah, because that's like one of those ones that you learn in your 20s was total bullshit. And he was like a lifeguard and stuff too. So I, I like tend to trust his opinion with this sort of thing, but I'm like, come on, man. Yeah.

Well, you know what didn't come up last week. And again, this week is we're going to talk about some kids' stuff again. The pool turning orange when you pee, which I thought that would have came up. And that's come up on Burnaphone in the past. I honestly believed that for like way longer than I should have. Yeah. I honestly, I don't pee in the pool, man. Other former co-hosts of this podcast have openly talked about the fact that they pee in the pool.

I do not pee in the pool. It's not my thing. I guess you're just better than the rest of us. Oh, no, you're a fucking pool peeer, man? Yeah. Oh, my God. It really depends. I mean, I have a small bladder.

Something about the water really triggers me, you know. I pee in the ocean. Yeah. But I just, I won't pee in the pool, man. I respect that. I really do. I mean, I can't help it sometimes. But it's different.

It's like different. Like it's so easy for you to go pee. Like you can just get out of the pool. You're wearing shorts. I understand that part. You're wearing like a one piece bathing suit. You have to get out. I can't go just like stand on the side of the pool and pee in a bush or something.

Yes. I appreciate that. I'm not doing it to be disrespectful. I'm doing it out of convenience. All those years in Manila Pool Club, when we were children going there. That was like our childhood. You know, we're from Queens.

But back then you were allowed to pay to be a member. of this community pool, Manil pool club. I never peed in the pool, not once. And I guess everybody was peeing in that fucking thing. I was swimming in a pool of piss

and, like, this is the problem with society, you know? I was an upstanding member of society thinking that my piss was going to turn red if I peed. And I get no credit for that. This is the thing.

This is why, This is one of the great sort of problems with humanity is that you get no reward really for being a good person, actually. Believe it as a kid. That's very impressive. I'm not saying you're a bad person, by the way. No, I am. I'm using this as a metaphor. You get no reward, you know.

Nobody knows whether you're like, you know, nobody knows whether you're really separating your garbage. Nobody really knows, you know. nobody knows like nobody's really paying attention to like if you're water like today they put out a thing about like you know try to go easy on water in your lawn like nobody really knows if you're doing it or not you know and it's particularly a problem in america because there's just much more individualism like Europeans in general tend to be more like that just because they feel like that's the right thing to do not everybody's doing it but more right less in the united States, but this is the thing is who's right and who's wrong because there's no fucking,

there's no punishment and there's no reward for being good. Yeah. I have this kind of energy with the picking up dog poop situation because I always, always, always pick up dog poop. Always. You got to pick up? And nobody in my neighborhood cares. They don't pick up?

No. Really? They're leaving it all over the place. Yeah. It's crazy. I can't even put myself in the position of doing, like if I, if I, ran out of bags or forgot bags, that would be one time.

But doing it constantly, just letting your dog poop and walking away is crazy. Well, are there still curb your dog signs around? Yeah, there's a ton. Oh, there are still. Okay, because, like, I feel like in the 80s, there was, like, a big campaign about curbing your dog and picking up your dog poop.

And, you know, I just think that we might need another round of that. We have signs that, like, curb your dog with fines on them. But how do you even enforce that? Like, who's watching to see if your dog's pooping and you're leaving it behind? Like, you get written a ticket? Like, how do they even enforce that? Well, if this is becoming more and more common, I say this is a way to, like, raise some civic money.

I think the non-curbers need to be punished, man. You know, and you know what I think it is too, though? Like part of the problem is that like dog culture, I'm a dog guy, but like dog culture is getting so out of hand. And like human spaces are getting less and less respect in terms of like not everybody loves dogs. I love dogs. I love the fact that people are bringing their dogs to almost every situation. Like I actually love that. But I also know that not everybody's into that.

And I feel like people are respecting less and less some humans desire not to be around dogs. And they're also respecting less and less just like dog shit and stuff like that. They're all starting to think like, oh, it's not a big deal. But it is. Yeah. There's also, I have a huge problem with like people that are willy-nilly off leash with their dogs. Oh, there's my favorite topic. There's someone in my neighborhood who has like four.

little crusty white dogs. They all walk together at once, no leash. Four of them, zero out of four leashes. And I came walking with my beautiful pit bull raspberry outside of my door, on a leash, as always. And the lady started freaking out. And she was like, oh my God, a pit bull. I'm like, none of your dogs are on. My dog did nothing.

She barked at your dogs. But there's four dogs with no leash and you're scared of my dog who is standing there on our porch with a leash. Like, I don't know, man. I got into a TikTok algorithm of a guy, in fairness, it was some English guy that clearly wanted agro. The not friendly guy? Is it screaming not friendly? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I've seen like this come up where someone will use that audio, but it'll be like them with their cat on like a leash outside or something. Or a rabbit. I think it's him, but I've definitely seen that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just get a lot of them where people are complaining, you know, but he's on leash. But then I get another guy whose dog is off leash, but like is like perfectly trained. Anyway, whatever.

I have a lot of thoughts about all this. I think we could do a whole episode on this. So I, I, the off leash thing, I'm not a fan, 100%. I do understand that some dogs are insanely well trained. Like, who's that comedian? Justin Silver. Justin Silver, like, he has his dog so well trained. He trained our dog.

Yeah, so for somebody who's that adept at keeping their dog in control, I 100% get it. But for the majority of people, your dog is not well enough to be off leash, like in the public. Like in a dog park, fine or in like a big open space, fine. But like if there's any time where your dog is not under your control, then your dog shouldn't be off leash. yeah especially because i feel like so many of them they might just get excited and go check out another dog because they yes they don't understand that like they automatically assume like this dog might be my friend and they run straight up to their face and it's like yes to my dog it would on alive your dog like and this is the thing about to say because you know we're pity we love pities here but i really i i am actually

I have a firm belief that you should have to do just like a dog responsibility training course to get a pit bull. Now, I know that you're a responsible pit bull owner, and I was a responsible pit bull owner. But I just, there's some people that are naive, you know, in that like a pit bull is just a stronger dog, you know? It just requires more responsibility. Like when you foster from Southampton Animal Shelter, you are one. 100% not allowed to bring your foster to the dog park, like 100% against the rules, right? Because they know that you can't control every situation.

In fact, Southampton, Annamar shelter is very anti-dog park, actually, because there's just so much lack of understanding of different dogs' personalities and like all the things that can go wrong. So I love pits. I think it's great that more people have pits, but I just don't think enough people understand

the responsibility that comes to owning any, not just pits, any of the larger, stronger breeds. And some people are just, I honestly, I see fucking German Shepherd's off leash. I see some dogs off leash. I'm like, yo, this is like a recipe for disaster. Yeah. I do feel like with the big dogs, there's slightly more pressure to train your dog versus with a small dog, like so many people, for whatever reason, don't train them.

I feel like they don't have to. And then they're just yappy and misbehaved. Yes. And they're like provoking the problems a lot of the time. Yeah, Jack Russell's Chihuahua's fucking any little yippy yappy terrier. They're like the, they're like the short guy who was friends with the bully that won't like shut up. You know? Yeah.

You know, and then, you know, French bulldogs sitting there like they're not a fucking mini pit with a funny head sitting there like I can go to coffee shops. Why can't you? It's like, bro. I check your genetics. We're not that far away from me. other on fucking ancestry dot, dot bark. Whatever the, you know, whatever the fucking canine, you know, whatever fake canine DNA shit that they do.

Anyway, you got to pick up your dog shit, all right? And you got to keep your dog on leash. Now, I love when a pit finds a friend that they're comfortable playing with. and the way that they play is so intense. But then, like, people that aren't in the know are like, oh, that's dangerous. And it's like, it's actually not. But, you know, what are you going to do? There's a pit bull attack there.

There's an ambulance on the way to. Yeah, it's tough. Like, we really have to, like, I'm totally with you on the, um, there needs to be some type of course because in the proper situations, like, she does really well. Like, even at first, when we first got her, she was weird with people. too. Like she was only comfortable with me and Chris. And if anyone else came in, it was really like a gamble. But now, like, we know exactly how to like introduce her properly to people. And she's like so easy and comfy with people now. It gets comfy with them right away. So it definitely takes time. But we don't put her in situations that could, you know, not be so good for her. We don't even give her the opportunity. So. Yeah. And I was that way with all these fosters. Actually caused me loads of stress. Because. every time we had one of these fosters in the city, the elevated situations are like so stressful. Yeah.

Yeah, it's tough. But we do our best and we love her and she's very happy here as an only child. I would love to have more dogs. But when we first applied to foster her, they were thrilled that there was like a household with two adults, no kids, no pets. And I didn't even realize that was in such high demand. High demand. That's why we were such popular fosters. You know?

But what I will say is from my time doing stuff at South Antinanan Animal Shelter, I just had no idea how much I didn't know about dogs and their personalities and the positives and the negatives and just like shocked to me just the different situations that you could put a dog into. Like one dog

you could just throw into any situation and another dog is like so limited with what they could do. And I never we had dogs all our lives. Nobody ever told us that. We never knew. And we had some dogs that were terrible. We had a mistress, like a mutt, border collie type thing. She was really actually a terrible dog when you think about it.

But we never, you know, she would jump over the fence all the time, get out. You know, she'd be like bark at people, nip at people. We're just like, oh, she's, that's the way. Like, I just can't believe how irresponsible we were really when I think about it. So anyway, curb your dog. That's the message. I guess we should get into some messages. We've only had one message in a half an hour.

Do you want to You know what? Play the insult that came. I think I listed it as undescended. Hey, Jess. Hey, Nicole. Hey, guest. Hey, whoever's there.

What's up? I love your podcast. This is my second time sending in a voice now and you actually played one of them before for me. It's a, what is it? Creative comments. That was the prompt. I actually have a great one that my dad said insults.

Like apologies this, offends anybody, but you're like going to understand a testicle. You arrive late and you're useless when you get here. Like, fucking genius. Love it. You heard that before, Nicole? No, I was just nodding with approval. So creative. Very creative.

And as a testicular cancer, if I was, I don't take offense to that. Although apparently, guys that had to understand the testicle are higher risk of testicular cancer. But that's funny. You're like, for those that can't understand the Irish accent, you're like an undersed testicle. What is it? You're late to arrive and then useless when you get here.

Is that what it was? Something to that effect. Very funny. Honestly, though, like the dialers are too nice. Like most of the insults, they just like, they weren't like, they weren't like harsh enough. So what I'll do is I'm going to hold off on the insults until we can add them to next week, along with like, annoying sounds. And let's go back. Let's revisit some of the stuff from kids because there was some, I listed them.

I gave them a kids thing. I'm trying to be more organized with our prompts. Guys, we love quince here on Burnaphone. Now, I'm going to talk to you about great stuff that they have for women. But I have to tell you that the quince stuff for men is also amazing. You know it's summertime. So it's time for you to rethink what you're reaching for every day. Lighter fabrics, better materials, pieces that just feel good,

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it to the police, they would believe that I did it and I would go to prison forever. and I had such anxiety about finding this dead body that I would be blamed for. And that is probably very telling about my childhood. But yeah, so that is hilarious. And I hope you enjoy. I tell you why I like this one particularly because I think, oh yeah, I think I had a lot of anxiety all my life about being arrested for murder. did you have that too yes but i have oCD so my first question for this dialer was did you later in life find out you have oCD because i feel like that's one of those things that latches onto

because i still saying you thought you'd go to prison for murder like wrongfully or like randomly like what were the circumstances around yeah i can't even think of the various different scenarios but just like i just i would think that that could happen so much so that still to this day I have, every now and then, I have a recurring dream where in the dream, I remember, oh, yeah, you, you forgot about the murder. That you killed somebody? Yeah, like, yeah, like, in the, it's like a recurring dream where like, it's like, oh, shit, that's right. I forgot that I'm like, I'm, I'm, they're still trying to find me.

And in the dream, like, there's like a bunch of people that are like still, that, that know it's me. Wow. So in the dream, you're actually guilty of the murder? Yeah. But I can't, I can't, I can't really remember, like, why I, like, I can't, the situation of why I ended up killing somebody is so vague. So it's not like a person that you knew. It's like something from years ago that they haven't found you for yet.

Yeah, but it's also, like, not real. No, but I'm interested in that because in my, like, when I have dreams about this, I'm so concerned about being framed. Like, I haven't actually committed the murder. Right. Yeah. I think, I think, I think, I think, I think men are probably more inclined to think that they probably did. Well, there's something in your past that we, that we're unlocking. We need a dream expert. Yeah. I mean, uh, I, I, I, I definitely think I, I don't know if I had as much anxiety about being framed, but I've definitely had a lot of dreams about ending up in prison. and often for like, I don't know why.

Have you ever had the prison anxiety dream of like, you're like, how am I going to survive this? And like, you know. I don't think I ever actually end up in prison in the dream, but it is a fear throughout the dream or that I've like killed someone or stolen a car. Like it's very much about being framed and that I'm going to go to jail. But I never make it to the jail in the dream. It's always evading.

I never spend any time in the jail, but I've definitely been processed numerous times. my dream. Deposed. No, just I, not as much. I, I, I don't do, the judicial system actually plays no part in my, in my, uh, in my, uh, in my, um, you know, my dreams. But I definitely have like, I've done the walking in and had people like saying shit to me, you know, whoa. And by the way, I've been in real jails. I've, I've run like drug and alcohol things in real jails. So it's not like I'm just basing it on shit I've seen on TV. Like, I know the feeling of, like, being in a jail. So it's not just, like, typical, like, hey, motherfucker, okay, we get that ass. You know, like, it's not like stupid shit you see on TV. But, you know, anyway, I've been, I've been

processed. I've been in the jail. And, and I, the fear, like, I'm feeling real fear. Like, I'm feeling real, like, horror of I can't believe I'm in this situation. And I, I've, that's a recurring. That's crazy. But actually, I've never. But actually, I've never. never been in jail for the murderer that I did. Right. I've only ever been like, oh, shit. Well, I've not gotten away with it, though. It's ongoing.

They're on to you. They're trying to get me. Yeah. Some fucking French private investigator that won't let it go. You know, it's just like this. Wow. But I'm me, though. I'm me, though, because I'm always aware that, like, I'm always aware that, like,

people are going to be like, oh, that comedian did, you know? That is funny. Yeah, those like real life things kind of latch in where it's like, you know, I'm going to lose all my spots. Like now my Hulu special is tainted. No, I don't think that. I think like I'm going to have to like hide in a small country, you know. I always think I'll end up in a small village in China where I could just speak Chinese. And then 10 years later like, you know, some expose I'll be like, and this is where he's living now.

He's in a cave. You know, he's like he became an English teacher. in a small Chinese village in Hunan province. They have no idea that he's evading capture for a fake murder in his dreams. That's so scary. Do you wake up with so much anxiety? I wake up, I wake up like being like,

takes me like a minute to be like, oh, that's right. I never, I haven't done that. Or have I? Well, you know, this is the thing, you know. So anyway, who knows? But I also feel like with this prompt, it makes sense that you were so afraid of finding a dead body because I feel like this was in so many movies and shows.

Yes. Or like Stephen King's stuff where the kids find a body. Like, this is just kind of pushed on you as a child. Stand by me. You guys want to see a dead body? I mean, my generation, that movie's imprinted in our minds. And a sadness because a lot of, lot of the people in that movie didn't do well.

You know, either they're dead or they have serious mental health issues or like that other dude that ends up on watch what happens lives all the time, just like a very sort of strange career that he had. That other dude. Jerry O'Connell. Yes. Yes. So you just, it was an odd journey for the standby me people.

So let's, oh, you know what? I know I'm avoiding the prompts to that. but this came up on my Instagram and I thought it was very interesting. Couples are now getting airport divorced for the sake of their sanity. So like you get to the airport and you do your own thing until it's time to board the flight. I actually think that that's that's some good. Now Hannah and I haven't had much of that, but every now and then we have a thing where she wants to go to Starbucks and I just want to go to the lounge. and like in the early days

I would go like okay fine and then we'd be on the line and Starbucks for like a half an hour I'm like why are we waiting a half an hour for like shitty coffee and we actually kind of we sort of did get airport divorce

and it's like I'm going to go to the lounge but I didn't know that that was a thing for couples but I guess it is yeah I saw this too and that in part is to avoid like bickering yeah bickering oh you actually saw the same thing I saw yeah but I don't feel like

Chris and I are really bickering that much. Like I don't like, I like traveling together. I don't feel like we're bickering a whole lot when we're going through stuff, unless like we have different ideas of what the day looks like, but I don't think that we're bickering enough to get airport divorced. Yeah, we definitely don't have the bickering either.

So I think it's more for just like when one of, you know, you know the way some couples just have that thing where they're just like at each other all the time. And like, every time the other person makes a mistake, you're like, oh, here we go again with this. And then the other person's like, what, what? You know, like that energy.

You see that, particularly with older couples, you know? Have you ever seen, like, an older couple? It's just like everything they do, you know, like the guy's trying to put up the bag, and she's like, no, the other way, the other way, oh, God. And it's just like, you know, or he's like, what are you doing? What are you doing?

It's just like, oh, I always worry that that's like, that's the fate of a successful relationship. Yeah. Is great bickering at the end? Some of it is really endearing. Like if it's an older couple for sure, it's like, they love each other so much. Yeah. Yeah.

Like if you don't have misophonia and you've been together for 60 years, then there's something wrong with you. That's what I said. You put your lipstick on the way I hate it again, honey. You don't need lipstick anymore. Anyway, good advice, though, for the bickering couple. All right, let's take whatever you choose. You can choose.

Well, so we still have a lot of kids stuff. Yeah, we might as well get. Let's get through it. Hey, Des, love the special. I was just listening to the funny things that, you know, we thought as kids. And it reminded me when I was in elementary school, somebody said that it's you ate the paper from your little fortune from your fortune cookie, that it would come true. And I told this to my brother offhandedly and found out years later that he had been eating the fortune from his fortune cookie.

I totally forgot about it, but he was really hoping those would come true. Anyways, they never did. and my dad thought that I had this diabolical prank just trying to ruin his life. And it was just something I said that he thought was true. Anyways, love the pot. Thanks. I had never heard that, had you? No. Hannah thinks I'm like an evil spirit because I don't, I don't even read the fortune.

That's so sad. You like, pull it out, crumple it up, and get rid of it? Yeah, I just, I like fortune cookies. Yeah, but, okay, so you do have to break it open and remove the food. No, I eat, I, I take the one bite where I, you know, I take the first bite, then I get rid of the paper and I eat the second bite. You don't even look? I don't even look.

What's the point? To me, to me, to me, to me, to me, it's like, no, Hannah always reads it, you know? Yours? If I'm, if she's there, she'll read mine. No, she'd be like, you have to read it. And then I'll be like, okay, you know, I think I got that one in 85 too. You know, like, like, no, I mean, I honestly, I just like fortune cookies. The fortune part of it is, did we have a Google what the, did we have a Google what the actual history of the origin of the cookie?

Yeah. Yeah, it was controversial. I think it was a Chinese American thing, I thought. Yeah, but wasn't it like, it had also Japan like tied into it somehow. So we did we did we did look this up oh god we're repeating ourselves in the in the Nicole era that's a bad sign that means it's recent Jesus Christ this is a bad sign okay

sorry guys sorry for our fortune cookie obsession here wait but you like the fortune cookie enough you remember that it originated in Japan wow I'm confused that you like that cookie so much with that like the fortune is what makes it otherwise it's like a pretty mid cookie okay i'll tell you why i like a fortune cookie because chinese restaurants notoriously not great for dessert right it's not like their speciality i like the donuts where do you get those you know like the little sugary fried ball oh yeah okay yeah but it's like so anyway but i also don't want to eat like a big dessert

because, you know, I feel like a fatty. So a fortune cookie is just like a nice gentle amount of sweetness to just like, you know, scratch that itch. So for those that didn't listen to that episode, or me who probably read this out and fucking didn't pay any attention,

they actually originated in Japan. They evolved from a 19th century Japanese savory cacto called Sujura Senbei. I'm not Japanese, not my thing. Brought to California and Hawaii by Japanese immigrants in the early 1900s.

The treats were later popularized by Chinese American restaurants. So it's really just a Chinese American thing. So, there you go. There's no, there's not even like, there's not a connection to any deity.

There's a connection to nothing. You know? This is the whole thing of like, I was like, you got to read your force. It's like, why? It's just nonsense. You know? Am I too cynical? Maybe, I don't know, I like the whimsy of a fortune, but I'm also someone who'd be like, it's the same thing with like your zodiac sign or whatever, like reading that stuff where either I'm like, whoa, this exactly applies to me or it doesn't apply to me at all and I don't believe in it. And there's nothing in the middle. It's either one or the other. But you're kind of forcing to make it fit your life in a way. Yeah. I mean, I know this is not a popular take amongst the general populace of. the dialers.

But I think that all that stuff is total nonsense. I'm just going to out my- total nonsense. Whoa. From start to finish. You know? Now you've really lost all the Hannah fans. I know, I know, but this is the yin-yang, you know?

This is like, it's just total boulder dash, you know? Hogwash, as far as I'm concerned. What's your sign? the scorpio okay and what hannah would say is that this is a very scorpio take dialers in the spotify comments we need to convince daz to believe in this so if you feel like he's a true scorpio you know more about this than me leave comments yeah or WhatsApp or hit us up on the uh on the phone to give him a reading. 9-1-7-5-1-2-1-7-8,

64-6-4-2-3-7-0-2-0. By the way, numerous people messaged in to say that the number one doesn't actually have letters on a phone. So our whole, like, trying to get a number thing was a bit of a failure. And, you know, did we ever play the song the other day? We actually played it, right? Did we...

Oh, I played it when I was on my album. Yeah, yeah. So we appreciate some people making the effort there. But give us a call. let us know. Yeah, I don't believe in any of it. Do you believe in mediums? Nope.

Like psychic mediums? This is flooding my algorithm recently. Okay, so this is how much I don't believe in psychic mediums. In like the year, I'm going to say 2002, maybe. In Ireland, there was a TV show. I can't even remember the exact name of the TV show, but they wanted to do a thing about mediums. So they asked me to play this like snake oil salesman character. But they gave me like all this stuff about how to cold read.

Right. And I looked up all stuff about John Edwards was the big medium at the time. And I looked up all stuff about cold reading and the tricks that you can use just for real cold reads. Not even like some of the really sneaky tricks that some of these events have. You know? So I looked up all the tricks about cold reading and just like, you know, how you can. make better educated guesses by like narrowing things down and you know like certain things that you can just assume about people so and then we're filming it with hidden cameras i went on to graft

the street in dublin and luckily very early on i can't even remember if it was like literally the first person uh i got an american tourists now this is not a slight on americans i consider myself americans but they're more naive when it comes to this shit you know i Irish people are just naturally more cynical, right? So I get this woman, and I'm using all the techniques, which I can't even really remember now. But I put a lot of effort into, like, the techniques. So very quickly, I say something, and she's like, yeah, we're here to spread my grandfather's ashes, right? like I'm like everything I said I nailed with this woman just pure luck right so she's like I'm

I'm here to spread my grandfather's ashes and I was like oh yeah I'm seeing water and she's like he wants us to spread them in the iris sea in county Wicklow I really started to feel guilty and I said everything I said everything I said it was fucking bang on and this was like heavy jelly man And like, this woman was like literally thought that I was like channeling her grandfather, who she's like feeling connected to anyway because they're there to spread his fucking ashes. And she was so into it that like I just was like under no circumstances. Am I telling this woman? I'm full of shit.

I just said he just. Oh, I said he says this isn't a sad occasion. It's a happy occasion. And she said, yeah, he had a great life. And I was like, yes. and I just like like was like okay you know he he he's happy that you're honoring his wishes and I just left and I felt terrible yeah no about this woman not this woman thought is this woman give you a good person award yeah I'm having dreams about murdering somebody I've having dreams

about murdering somebody since he's haunting you this is the this is the core memory that's causing these murder dreams it might be yeah and like sometimes and then I was doing that all day Sometimes I was like kind of half getting it. Sometimes like people were like, this guy's full of shit. But then it's funny. One time, these,

uh, it was like five like 17, 18 year old boys. And they were all like Irish standards. They were like posh. Like you could tell by their accents. You know, they were like kind of like the upper crust of like Dublin.

You know, higher, higher level schools and shit. So I was like, I'm seeing, I'm seeing, uh, you're from the south side.

So the south side, would be the posher neighborhood, right? So then he goes, no, Northside. And then, because then he goes Northside, right? So now he's accidentally given me, even though I'm wrong, he's given me like, not only has he shut down 50%, but the Northside is the more working class part. So there's only like five fucking posh parts in all of the Northside.

So I go, Castle Knock, and they all go, oh, my God. Oh, my God. They all think I'm fucking psychic because I, I have, had a 20% chance of getting it right. And they were like, they were freaking out. They were freaking out. So it's all bullshit.

Hannah thinks I'm psychic, by the way, but I'm not. I'm just not a cold read. You're just really good at crowdwork. Yeah, it's literally crowdwork, man. All these guys, they're all Charlottons. That's what's so crazy, man. They're all fucking charlatans, bro. And I'm on like, I'm on like biblical study TikTok,

Dan McClellan. I've talked about it before. but like just all these people talking about like, you know, shit from the Bible, like acting like it's like true. And it's just so many people believing in nonsense. But I actually think I really, I'm starting to think that I'm the idiot, that like life is just so much easier if you just give in to the nonsense. That's actually what I'm starting to think. I'm the fucking idiot that's sitting out here. You know, just like being cynical and just being aware that 80% of human knowledge is bullshit.

And we're all like carrying on like with more superstitions than can possibly be that can be possible based on the amount of actual information we have and we're still holding on superstitions. And I'm the fucking idiot. You know? That's why I'm having anxiety dreams all the time. I should just give in and be like, yeah, I'm a Scorpio. I have all the traits. I have all the traits of a Scorpio. And Hannah's sign, which I don't even know, is a perfect match, you know,

because we're, you know, because she's a whatever rising. And I should just give in to all this shit, you know, and think that people are fucking, you know, telling my future and, you know, like all that. I should just give in. It's a happier life, you know? having something to believe in. Yeah. The problem is that it's not really believing in something

when you're like, all right, fine, fuck it. I'll fake it. Anyway, let's take a couple more. We love Rula on the Burn of Phone podcast. We love people being open about their mental health. And we certainly love people having a place to go when they think they need to talk to somebody. God knows I wish it was around when I was struggling

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That's hungarroot.com slash burner code burner to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life. Hi, guys. I was just responding to last week. episode of things that we believed as kids. And for whatever reason, well, I came from a very calm, non-violent, not crazy household, but for whatever reason, my mom, my aunts, my grandma, they all convinced me, my brother, and my cousins that if we ever hit anybody that our arms would turn into sticks,

and so it's something that I still have nightmares about today. And yeah, my fiance is safe as kitten. So I thought you'd find something funny about that. Okay. Love the pod. Keep doing your thing. Okay, bye. It's funny.

That's one I never heard of. It's a cute one, though, because immediately it's a funny image in your head of, like, ending up with stick arms. I don't get it. I mean, like, what, like, what is the, is it kind of? kind of like connected to sticks and stones in a way? I don't know. I think it's just you can say anything to a kid and they'll believe it. And it might actually stop their behavior, you know?

Like I didn't play in puddles as a kid because my mother told me I was going to get polio. Oh my God. She failed to let me know that I had been vaccinated against polio and that it wasn't really a threat anymore. You know? She just didn't want you to get dirty. Yeah, she didn't want us playing a poll. It worked. All of us.

We all said to each other, you're going to get polio if you're going to the, Like, you don't understand. I grew up an abject fear of polio, a disease that I'd been inoculated against and had basically disappeared as a threat to American children by the 1980s. I feared polio. Yeah. I mean, you might need to bring that fear back. But another thing from the fucking people that believe in nonsense.

No, you know what I mean? Like, when I see J.D. Van, like, J.D. Vance, a fucking convert to Catholicism. late in his life. And he's talking to all this religious mumbo, Joe. I'm like, dude, you don't believe a fucking ounce of this shit. You fucking charlatan, bro. It drives me crazy. And then Trump last week, Trump last week was, he said some shit about like, you know, some bringing God more into our stuff. I'm like, this guy doesn't fucking believe in God. One fucking bit, he believes he is God. He literally believes he is God. It's crazy.

The amount of people that are just pretending to believe in nonsense. It's so scary, actually. It's so scary. I apologize that people might think I'm coming for horoscopes, but that's not really my concern. It's not really my concern. There's bigger fish to fry. There's bigger fish to fry out there, man, you know? So let's take one more before we wrap it up here in a hot heat wave northeast

summer. Hello. Okay. So my misconception as a child or whatever was I thought in fast food restaurants, the soda machine, I thought the way it operated was there were a bunch of two liters in there. And when you put your cup on the lever, it would tilt the two liter to pour it out of machine and into your cup. And I don't know why. I think I just thought that two liters were. like the biggest possible mode of delivery for soda. But yeah, that was my little misconception. I like this one only because it reminded me of there was a time where free refills was not like a thing.

And the fear that I had of going back up to the soda machine. Still to this day, I think I still have a bit of it. even though I know it's not a big deal, I still think that somebody's going to be like, hey, this is your second cup, you know? It was really like,

because that all came, like that suddenly became a thing, like the soda machine being out. And there was a time where you couldn't go back up. So I can appreciate how as a kid, you know, the soda machine brings you,

and if all you've ever known as a two leader, it's a very, very rational thing to think. One of the great things about adulthood, is you don't have to buy two liters anymore. I actually hate the two liter bottles. You know, as an adult, you can be like,

I run my own life. I'm just going to drink cans. You know, I'm going to have cans in my fridge. And it's very liberating. Because unless you have a family, you're not getting to the bottom of a two liter before it's flat. Right?

Yeah, it's a really good point. Do you buy two liters? No, I don't really like drink a ton of soda. I definitely love Diet Coke, but... Yeah. Yeah, if we're getting anything, it would be cans for sure. Yeah, we can't beat it. Freezing cold can of Diet Coke.

You know? This question also made me want to ask you if you are someone who would get, like, ask for a cup of water, but then steal soda. Ooh, this is a biggie. So, because I have fear of even going for a second class, I'm sure you know that I not do that. But I have friends, though, that just like

all their lives, they just get such joy out of these little gamings of the system, you know? Stealing at self-checkout. Stuff like that. They just love little,

and they just, they can't help themselves. And so I've been with plenty of guys that do that. But no, I am not inclined to do that at all. I don't see the point.

In fact, I'm not even inclined to order a small, even if I'm staying in, because I know I can keep going up and getting more. I'll still get the big one because I'll be like, I don't need to be getting up. What's your feeling on some, I prefer a can of Coke, obviously, but there are some fountains where I actually think I prefer the Diet Coke from the fountain, but not all. It's very, very. McDonald's. So you think that that's the premium. Diet Coke?

100%. I think that's like universally agreed upon. Is McDonald's Diet Coke? Why do you have another fountain that you think? Well, you're one of the truth? I'm very rarely. I'm a Diet Coke guy, but I'm very rarely in McDonald's. That's part of the problem. Not a McDonald's guy. My mother, I don't know why.

My mother was anti-McDontal's growing up. So was mine, but that made me like have a problem with McDonald's today. in the sense that I get to like McDonald's all the time. My mother was a big Burger King. I think my mother was just always like a fan of the underdog. No, it's true. We're met fans. We went to Burger King.

You know, she hated NBC, for example. Like, you know? She, like, my mother, just anything that was like a top dog, my mother was like, they don't deserve that. So we always went to Burger King. and she loved Roy Rogers. Are you old enough to remember Roy Rogers? Well,

Roy Rogers is currently only at like, like truck stops, basically. Is it still there? Yeah, like, does it exist anywhere else? I don't know, because it's gone, but they used to have the fixin's bar.

I'm really, this is real Gen X shit. I feel like there has to be like a TikTok going about like, are you Gen X, the Fixins bar? You know, like, the Fixens bar? Do you know about that Fixens Bar?

No. So one of Roy Rogers' like selling points was you just got the burger or the cheeseburger, but then you put the lettuce, tomato, pickle,

sauce, you did it yourself at the Fixens bar. But you could really, you could soup up a fucking burger at the Fixens bar. And I don't know.

I guess my mother felt like Roy Rogers was like healthier or something. I feel like that was like the thought. I'm not sure. But yeah, my mother was Burger King

and Roy Rogers. That was our, and then when Taco Bell opened in our neighborhood, there was literally like a line around the corner. It was such a huge moment. Because Taco Bell wasn't big in New York City for a long time. You know, New York is now that they take for granted that there's Taco Bells everywhere. We didn't happen for years. Taco Bell was like, you're deep, deep, deep in the suburb.

It was like, oh shit, Taco Bell, cool. You know, came late to New York. What are your thoughts on Arby's? Oh, this is a very good question. Very good question. so many so first of all arby's just shows up in the most like arbitrary place like it's just it's pretty random arby's right i recently was charging my car somewhere and arby's was my only option so i went you know there was a time where i got an arby's and i was like you know what this sandwich is nice

but i i have not held on to that love of arby's in fact i've kind of gone off them i feel like they're on the way out, though. What's your feeling? Arby's is getting a lot of hate right now. Is it? Like, people are like Arby's is like, I saw a video recently where it was not like a dentist office or something like the staff there was like going around taking a video, just messing with their co-workers being like, hey, we're going to go to Arby's. Do you want anything? And everyone would be like, Arby's, like their reaction to the fact that they were getting Arby's so negative. But it is true. It's like. Because I would only go to Arby's if it's like the only option or like sometimes I used to go to Arby's because at exit 25 on the LIE it has a drive-through and it would be like I'd be coming back late from the cellar and I would be like you know what this is an option you know but it's always a bit dry I feel.

Yeah. I mean I like I like their tendies and curly fries situation but getting like a roast beef Sammy I'm like not really I have in the past and it did kind of like. hit the spot at the time, but I do understand why people are like, this is nasty. Yeah. The truth is, man, when it comes to drive-thru, and you know, you guys want to judge me on this, my number one option is Taco Bell for drive-thru. What's your order? I'm very varied with Taco Bell.

I like to, I let the big images on the screen, you know, get me. I'm like, oh, a Dorito Gordita, yes, whatever. You know, I don't even know what a gordita is. I don't think Mexican people know what a Gordita is. Mexican pizza. Whatever, you know. No, I just kind of, I don't have like a specific thing that I love. I like changing it up.

But I've never lost the fact that even though crispy tacos are not really like, I guess a toastata is a thing. But whatever the fuck a Taco Bell, crispy taco is, is not really like a thing. I, as a kid, you know, my younger, when Taco Bell first opened in Flushing, I just thought that the crispy tacos were like the best thing ever. And I've never been able to lose my love for eating too many of them. You know? Like I just love just like nonstop beef, crispy tacos. But I also like other stuff.

And it's not practical with the drive-ter. So with the drive-to, I tend to go for something soft. But that Dorito era that they went through, which I'm not even sure if it's still going. Unhealthy, yes, but quite tasty. Yeah, the Doritos Locos Taco is definitely hard to eat. Right. Oh, sorry. I didn't realize how in the...

There's a fellow fan here. Okay. I'm not like a huge Taco Bowl person, but I do really like those. They also used to have these like floutas or tequitos or something that were so good and they don't have them anymore. That was my go-to. They go through stuff. Yeah. And I just...

They have no loyalty to their fans. Yeah, exactly. Maybe it'll come back. So yeah, I'm very not inclined at all to go to McDonald's drive-thru. Burger King, I feel like Burger King just like, they need like a new PR. Like Burger King to me every time I go in, it just feels like everyone's given up. That's what I feel like. I feel like they've given.

I feel like they've given up, you know? Well, they tried to do something. Like remember when that video came out of the McDonald's CEO eating the big arch? Do you remember this? No. This was very recent, but there was a video of the CEO eating one of their new men. menu items, which was a big arch, which was basically like, I think it was similar to a Big Mac, but it had like crispy onions or something on it. And he was eating it and looked like he was going

to throw up, like disgusted. He was like, mm, like, can't we eat to eat the big arch and looked like he was going to vomit. So everyone made fun of him and they're like, you clearly, oh, and he kept referring to it as product. Like he wouldn't call it a sandwich. So everyone was making fun of him for that. And then the Burger King CEO came out with him like being in the kitchen at Burger King. Like being cool in the kitchen at Burger King. and being like, let me eat the Whopper. And so they tried to, like, dunk on the CEO of McDonald's. Pretty cool move by Burger King.

Good, good move. They have, like, up their Twitter game or something. But I still feel, as far as the burgers go for the fast foods, that I do think that the Whopper is the superior fast food burger. You're not going to agree? I don't really ever go for the burger, so I can't really weigh in. Right. Like, I'm always, like, McChicken or, like, crispy chicken sandwich, McNuggets.

And if I go to McDonald's, like... So I get the chicken fries at Burger King. Oh, I don't even know those. The chicken fries? Yeah, I don't even know what they are. Tap in. They're really good. Oh, God.

I didn't realize just your fast food expert. I think we need to do a fast food. We have to. If I gained, like, 20 to 30 pounds after my surgery, I'm fueled by McDonald's. I said, man, hit the needle, bro. I might shoot up. Jabbarama, yo. I might.

Stay tuned. Anyway, don't be afraid to message us with your favorite fast food stuff. And, oh, just for the record, I 100% prefer authentic Mexican tacos. I'm not under any circumstance. This is like 2 o'clock in Long Island, you know, like, you know, I'm not saying that this is my go-to thing. I'm just saying, like, when I go for the drive-thru. So, all right, guys, thanks so much. And do check out my special on who.

It'll be out. It was actually, I think I said July 10th, but July 12th, it'll be on YouTube. For those that haven't been able to see it. And send us in some messages, might as well say the number. One more time, 9-1-7-5-1-2-17-8 plus 1-6-46, 42370-20. Save that number in your phone. So that when I post the prompt, you know, because it is hard to get it off the story. save that number in your phones.

I post the prompt. You can send it in. And we better play out a couple at the end. I had a complaint from somebody saying, I miss when you play out things. That's a telephone call on the landline. There's a landline. Did you hear that?

I'm in a hotel. That was a landline. What the hell is this? Hello? Anyway, thanks, Nicole. We'll talk to you next week. I love to tell a man to stop being a masy pad. It's kind of like saying, you know, oh, stop being a girl about it.

But being a girl makes no sense. Girls are amazing. Girls are strong. Girls are powerful. Okay. All of those things makes no sense that's outdated. But being a massive pad, they don't like that. They don't want to be a nasty pad.

But it's funny so everybody laugh. It's a great insult to get everyone laughing to embarrass that guy just in a that he's not going to have a reaction other than laughter. You just get away with it in a way that just feels good. It feels good. I've even told a manager at work in front of his whole team, I said, stop being a maxy pad. It went over great.

No HR violations, or at least HR never found out. So you can use it. You heard it here. people go forth with maxi pad in corporate America. My favorite creative insult to call people is a pussy fart. It's better than pussy as if someone's being lame or a loser. It's a little spunkier than just calling someone a pussy fart. So I say pussy fart.

Okay, the first thing that came to my mind when I saw this prompt was that growing up, my brother, my brother who, like, bullied me incessantly, he had no app whatsoever. So we, for years and years and years and sometimes still now, he used to call him tailbone because that's all that there was to hold his ass up, or hold his pants up. But I guess you really have to know they kind of junk in someone's trunk to use that insult. But I'd say ones like that are pretty good. Hey, Des. Hey, Nicole. Hey, special guest. My favorite insult that I like to do use when people suggest to do something that I just don't want to do is using hyperbole to say all the other things that I'd rather do.

Like, I'd rather throw open my shoes and walk around than them, or I'd rather chop my left arm off. I think it's just a fun creative way to express yourself and say how much you don't want to do something. Okay, thanks. Bye.