Berner Phone - Delaney Rowe: Fake Fun & From Idaho

Episode Date: June 25, 2022

Delaney Rowe is an actress and content creator who grew up in Idaho and just hit 1 million followers on TikTok! We have a huge girl crush on her because she is hilarious, smart, and very good looking. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to Burning Hell Welcome to Hell Welcome to hell, you guys. I'm with Delaney Row, who I did discover her on TikTok. Our algorithms really put us together. Like, your shit comes up 24-7. I'm like, I get it. I think she's hilarious.

So good to hear. I just want to say. congrats you hit a million which is like fucking incredible very well timed that it just happened I'm building you up and now we're going to break you down please too welcome to roast me baby but first I want to roast LA for a second you just offered me a liquid death yeah for people don't know it's water in a can um there's why are there's so many liquids in LA because everyone is is like constantly trying to remain hydrated so that you know we look good the skin glows but the thing is and i don't know if you feel this way when you're dehydrated

you kind of got a little skinny yeah like feeling snatched i mean i haven't drank water since 2005 and that's the root of all my issues yeah yeah yeah yeah because of the same water's boring as fuck but the problem is in l.a i wake up what did i have to drink in the morning whatever you get like today get like a coffee then i went somewhere and they're like you want some kombucha cambucha whatever and I was like no thank you and like four other people were like get some kombucha and I'm like no thanks and then I went somewhere and they had like a boba macha latte so I had to try that

sure and then there was like this like coconut latte fizz whatever I took it and then yes then they have these fucking Celsius drinks that are fucking cocaine that's right and then I'm not even hungry because I have so much liquid in my body I can't even enjoy yeah that might be the secret

and why everyone in L.A. is so thin. Yeah. Yeah, how are you feeling right now? You've had a lot of caffeine. It sounds like. But I was so upset. I'm an eater. And I ordered all the drinks everyone wanted.

And then I finally ordered actually a salmon niqua salad. I don't know who I thought I was in that moment. Let's try that pronunciation again. That's how I ordered it. Nisuis. Niquizi? Niswa. Niswa.

Oh my God, that's so funny. I said Niqua to the lady and she just went with it. Of course she did. What? She going to roast you in front of? Who are you with at this lunch? Were you all? I was alone for a reason. Where the hell is your husband? You're married to a very attractive man. Is that okay to say? He's beautiful. That makes me so happy. He's very, very good looking.

Oh, my God. Thank you. And I was just looking at your wedding photos, and it just looked magical. How did you meet this guy? Thank you. How did you do this guy? Um, it was Instagram DM? Okay. Is it, but it was like, because we both are in comedy and we had mutual friends. And he added me. Did he DM you? he added me and i thought he wanted me on his podcast turns out doesn't like my personality he wanted you in i think he thought i was cute which is like whatever yeah right i hate it when that happens i hate it it's like sometimes like can people notice me besides my incredibly good looks yeah i know

it's a burden it's a burden and i've always said that yeah and i've always said that yeah and then during covid he'd be on me because we were quarantining in a similar area in new york yeah where do you live in new york lori side cool Do you like older men? Yeah. I'm like, and no more questions about where I look. I'm just going to go. I do, yeah. Sure.

You like older men? Sure, yeah, I do. I realized, though, that not too old, not to be ages here. I just realized, you know, I think there's a certain point where I'm just like, it's not, it's not vibing for me. I kind of went out with somebody who was kind of at the end of my, I'd say, bracket there, which was give us. the number.

39. Honey. How old's your man? 46. And he's exhausted. Yeah. And I'm obsessed with that. He is so tired.

He will never cheat on me. He has arthritis. He has arthritis. I have a bit right now where I say, if you want to meet an older man, like raise your age range or just go to Walgreens and hang out in the Advil section because their lower backs are killing them. And it's so fucking true. So do you have to do all the work then? Are you? Okay. You know what happened? I think it was him. I don't think it was the age. It was definitely him because 39 is a ripe young buck.

I think the perfect age for me right now is like 33. But so but but but this man. May I ask how old you are? I'm 26. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Okay. When I was 26, I was the oldest guy ever was with was 35 and I thought he was like oldest fuck. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I don't think the first older man. Still okay. But this was, you know, now that let's just talk about it. talking about it was him it was him he this sort of moment happened it definitely wasn't him it definitely wasn't me um well i you know i actually sent maybe the first text of like if this isn't going to work yeah in my life i would i would ghost i'll say it i like i like how many what's the

most dates you would go on that you'd ghost you're like three years i would ghost after two two dates two dates no that's perfect i'm i'm very i'm very into the ghosting because as an empath yeah yeah yeah as an empath no i can see it if you're dating it's it's actually coming your nipples are hard right now you're an empath i feel sweaty that's what i feel right now too if you if you go on five dates a week because you know which i do every which is great for you if you go on a bunch of dates and you don't feel it with the person then you're expected to literally break up with strangers every day. That is emotionally taxing.

It's so taxing. And if I don't respond, that is literally the simplest way of me saying, I don't know you that well, but what I've learned doesn't even... Heard loud and clear. So I'm full, like, to protect your own energy, ghost him. And for people are like, that's bad energy. If a guy doesn't respond to me after two dates... I love that.

I don't want to tell me what he doesn't like about me. I get it. I think I'm getting ghosted as we speak. somewhere somewhere on the east side someone is ghosting me um i i love your instagram bio instagram bios are difficult it's hard they are or tic-tac ones because you're like how do i want to be immediately judged in only like seven characters right and you don't want it to be hacky but you want it to hit you want it to hit you want a little like at least air out of the person's nose that's right you know so yours says

Delaney Roe, she, her actor, actress, what did you say? I like actress, but I don't know what it says on there. Okay, well, we'll get into that. Yeah, that's, um-huh. And, you're like, having so much fake fun. That's right. What does that mean? What does that say about you?

What did you want to express to the world with that? Um, I, you know, I think I ripped it from someone. You know who I ripped it from? Let's talk about, uh, name-dropping Jerry O'Connell. Uh-huh. He's, um, a sort of, like, third-party friend. of mine and he was watching a video of a couple girls dancing on a boat and he goes wow that's exactly what fake fun looks like and I went that's a really really good good Instagram bio and I feel like

I had a period in my early 20s where I was just oh man just balls to the wall with the stories you know like the selfie in the bar mirror you know that kind of thing a lot of boomerangs a lot of that going on and I was like that was my fake fun era I'm entering my real fun era though I think yeah because I'm single now and I'm very rich and famous are you newly single um ish I well I would consider it of course he has a new girlfriend now I would consider it new um January also it's funny do you consider yourself a comedian can you can you like can you please start okay because like I feel like I feel I feel like, like, as a comic, like, you have pure comedy energy.

Pure comedy energy. Thank you so much. And also, let's be honest, you're acting. And I feel like comedy is a sector of acting. Like, every night on stage, I am, like, giving a performance. Yeah, your stand-up is so good. It's so good. Oh, my God. You have to come to my show in L.A.

I would love to. In August. It's in August? I'll hook it up. I'm also going to do a New York moment soon, so I'll come, and then we'll show you the real me. I'll show you the real me. 3 a.m. Mr. Purple. But I also think reading that bio of yours made me immediately like you because it's not over,

it's not, it's not, it's really self-aware. It also is empathetic to the people looking in being like, hey, I'm here with you. We know that we're all struggling with like comparing how much fun other people are having with life. And you're just inherently, I don't know why, but I have always like rooted for you. Like you have good energy. I like look at your stuff and even when we met I feel like we've known it we passed life probably um PL yeah yeah this is PL vibe it's giving PL oh my god it's giving serious PL I'll talk to some

people I'll get back to you on like the details of it right um did where was okay where are you from Idaho I'm sorry no no don't apologize don't apologize okay let me just Where are you from? I'm from Brooklyn, New York. Fuck you. Fuck you. No, but this is the thing. I went to college in Wisconsin.

I also just tennis. I got a scholarship. Purely money. Okay, athlete. Okay, Venus Williams. I'm not to brag. I did have a career that I did fail in. But anyway.

But with stand-up and tennis, I traveled to so many random cities in the U.S. And I do have to say, as a snowy New Yorker, you love to be like, New Yorker nowhere. Sure. But I found that every town has, like, a block that is vibey and cool and has cool people. Sure. So I don't judge. Okay. Are you okay?

I'm okay. Growing up in Idaho, what was that like? It was boring. You know, I don't remember. I don't remember. Do you remember high school? I don't. Oh, yeah, very blurry.

Very blurry. I don't remember. I remember, like, getting breakfast once from a. sure yeah yeah from that one spot same actually i remember a breakfast i like food i remember a i remember a cornbread muffin yeah sure sure i it was um it was fine you know it was i i was i think well liked but not popular you know what i mean yeah same yeah yeah we're a little too off color sure to be in the cool cool girls group because you have to actually be boring like the actual cool girl group. No one's, you're not talking about anything out of the ordinary. That's right. And I only, I kind of

realized that when I went to college, I was like, why am I so much happier now? Like, you know, I, I, I, I like LA. I really like LA. It's okay. You don't have to whisper. I know, and I went to USC. I didn't love USC. You know, I like, I loved my program at USC, but I didn't like love USC. Did you study acting? That's right. When did you first get the acting bug in your life? Um, when I saw confessions of a teenage drama clean with Lindsay Lohad? My God. How good is that movie? That was so fucking good.

I do think Lindsay was so relatable. I mean, she's from Long Island, so like girls like me. Like I know tons of girls just like... I mean, Amy Schumer, too, is just like a girl from Long Island. And you're like, this could be me. And I feel like at the end of it when it was always like the perfect ending of her like being like happy and cool and she got the guy, you're always like, that could be me. Yeah.

Have you seen Georgia rule? Yes. That is the... Can we talk about this? I just saw this movie recently. that is the craziest movie released in America it excuse me I'm burping I know it's fine it was I mean I the the plot like it's I saw it a while ago and I remember loving it and like the guy was hot but I feel like that was one of after that I feel like it really went downhill it's the craziest movie you have

to watch it again because it it deserves someone someone needs to talk about it on a podcast and Someone needs to be punished for that film. And why did Jane Fonda do that? Oh, I forgot. It was about her being like slutty? No, the darker. It was kind of like, did or did her stepdad molest her or not? Yeah.

It was like a did he, didn't he film. Oh. Yeah, that shit is fucking crazy. It was crazy. It was a terrible movie. That was, when I was. younger i thought it was like interesting and naughty that was probably her like trying to get out of the like disney type of that's simple vibe but maybe it went it tried too hard to be it tried way too

hard oh my god and that guy now is with emma roberts i think oh yeah garret headland yes garrid headland super cute just you know l a name dropping i see them all right and and by see them um this happened two years ago um emma roberts and garer headland at um cafe stella which is my favorite bar unless i just have you ever been okay i know nothing about l-a this is my fourth time i just went to cafe earth so so that's going to be earth cafe let's just just put that thing down and reverse it i'm so embarrassed uh-huh um yep you should be um i don't really fuck with it it's okay right it's okay it's okay it's okay is this where you got your Nisua salad? Yes. And I got the Boba blended green tea. Okay. Which was a journey for me.

Absolutely. Emotionally and physically. How many caffeinated beverages have you had today? I had two sips of the Celsius water and I'm, I feel like I could knock my head against that wall and I feel like you could Kool-Aid man style bus through that wall. We were just saying before you got here how like crazily designed this room is. It's giving designed by a man, A man who never grew out of his college dorm decor. It's giving design by two men. Like one man did it and was like, bro, is this good? And they were like, absolutely.

We were saying like, it's just missing a California flag or a tapestry. But no, but I don't want to talk that bad about this room. A, because I do know the owner. And B, no, no, it's fine. He'll laugh at it. He's a good sense of humor. But B, because in stand-up, there's green rooms in every club. Yeah.

And it's a male dom. industry. Sure. It is insane how different a green room would be styled if it was a female dominated industry because these rooms are straight up a closet. There's not a mirror. The bathroom is like right there. So if you have to shit and there's four comedians in the room, you're all just shitting together. Perfect. And like not even, there's just nothing, like not even a candle. Yeah. And then God forbid there's like tampons or anything. Like not a vanity. Yeah. And it's literally just a holding cell before you go on and you're laughing like it's literally for swine to be released onto the stage yeah there's like a red cup of milagro tequila and that's about it that not even it's they don't

yeah they don't give a shit but um i actually don't really know a lot of actors which sounds crazy but like i'm in new york so i hang out with comics podcasters and right so you're drunk all the time you're yeah you're drunk all the time i don't drink that much um that i i didn't know i actually asked before you came because i was like last time i was here i brought the girl a bottle of champagne and she was like i'm sober i was like cool cool i'm not sober but i um you smoke a lot of weed no i cry when i smoke weed and i love people all my friends smoke weed like they say i fit in because i'm you love stoners i giggle a lot and i'm always hungry okay so like And stoners love me.

And I'm an ungenjured. I'm an ally. Yes. I'm truly an ally. And they are attracted to me. That makes total sense. I literally just an Uber and the guy's like, I'm high. Do you want to?

Shut up. Like that was the most L.A. shit ever. Are you kidding me? Besides the magician that stopped me in the street, that was very L.A. What has your acting journey been? Oh, nothing. Oh, just a lot of not working. Yeah.

Like, can you actually explain the reality of it? Yeah, of course. Because I hear the, like, L.A. stories, which are either, like, Like, I tried in L.A. and I left, or I tried in L.A., someone saw me in a mall, and then I was on a billboard. Yeah. I feel like they don't talk about the complexity of it. Yeah, it's just, I mean, that's why I started TikTok, because I was just so tired of not getting a job. Did you have an agent?

Mm-hmm. How many auditions were you doing weekly? Weekly, that's cute. Once every six months. Like, it was crazy. And what kind of roles? Like a Nina Dobrev, sort of in the Vampire's kind of thing. Yes.

That thing. And then I was like, I'm not that. I guess I sort of maybe look that way I could do a CW thing yeah but I I'm just not what is your dream my dream like the dream career is like a Jennifer Lawrence Emma's Emma Stone pipeline yeah situation well that's what I see for you thank you because it would be it would be like me doing reality TV yes like you I can do it I can do it but it wasn't the best version of me how really Real is reality TV. Not real. Not real at all? It's meta-reel. Okay.

Like it's real for the fake reality that it's created. Totally. Yeah, bro. Yeah, I'll tell you about my time on reality TV. It turned to a cigarette. Do you see that? Yes. Oh, I imagine.

I just saw that. Your mimery. What was your mind work? You're a clown. Incredible. You're like Charlie Chaplin over there. So you are your parents supportive of the actor dream? Yeah, they are.

I'm really, really lucky they're coming in town tomorrow, actually. Oh, that's great. To celebrate one million, they're so supportive to the point where my mom did not even expect for me to go to college. She's like, you're just going to go be an actress. I was like, wow. Can you believe in me a little less? Yeah, that's actually a lot of pressure could come off. Yeah, and also it's not interesting for me to be like, yeah, my parents are supportive.

And then the conversations that are here, you got to be like, she's fucking wants me to be a doctor because I was so smart. You know those people? Yeah. It's hard for them because I'm like, wow, you're that fucking smart that you actually have this option. Yeah. So they were never, I never thought I would do that. And now what I'm thinking about it.

I'm like, what the fuck? Their only hope for me was to be an act? Just didn't want to be myself. Yeah. Just don't be yourself. Yeah, be different. That'll be great. Just go act like other people.

Be different. My mom actually said one of the meanest things that's ever been said to me. Hi, mom. We can laugh about it now. But in high school, she was like, you behave like your life is a movie. and it's not. I was like, all right. I don't remember that forever.

She invented main character energy. Dude, I loved main character. When it came out main character energy, I was like, these people get me. Like every time you look out of a car window, you're just like, listening to break away. Yes, all the time I'm like, like when you're in the Uber,

you envision you're like a celebrity and documentary, just being like, yeah, I'm going to be there soon. I'm coming. I'm just exhausted. I'm exhausted. I am exhausted. I've been on all fucking night, like, practicing. I'm going to be there soon.

Just love fucking pressure. And like, call my agent, tell him to deal with it. Yeah. And, yeah, even just like when you're walking, like, I envision just, yeah, I'm totally the star in my own movie. That's right. Every time I get in, like, have a difficult conversation with somebody or I'm in an argument, I'll just go outside and I'll smoke a cigarette.

I don't even smoke. That is so funny. Yeah. I have a pack because I do videos where the character is often smoking. Yeah. And so I have the pack and I will just, I might went up if I have, like, a weird conversation and I'm just like, this feels so good. It is a form of, you just said it, feeling your feelings.

I'm not good at feeling my feelings because I'm scared of them. Oh my God, neither's my mother. But if you're feeling it, then you like fully embrace it and then you can move on instead of bottling it all up and then one day getting kicked out with Starbucks. Did you? No, but one of my friends did. I was like, I know what happened to you. What do you mean that you are bad at feeling your feelings?

I, well, it's as an athlete and people on the podcast know because I have to bring it up at least four times an episode. Yeah, bring it up again. Your, your, your, what makes you a good athlete is to not look nervous, not look scared, not be tired. You, you have to be a robot. Sure. So, like, you're taught to just suppress all emotions to be, it's like you're a warrior. So you're not supposed to be like, I feel this.

I feel that. Yeah. So then like, when you walked in with your crossbody floral dress, I was like warrior. Warrior. And your diamonds. Women are multidimensional. That's right. Fascid.

Fastid. Yeah. Yes, yes, Sebastian, either or. Dimension, yeah, gosh, either right. You know what? Tomato potato. We'll debate on that later because I feel like that was kind of too close to, anyway. Just immediately, like, coming in.

Yeah, it's actually fascinated. No, both are the exact same word. Yeah, that was. This is a synonym podcast now. It's about synonyms. It's about synonyms. But I do think as an actor, you have to channel emotions. Mm-hmm.

which that might be why as a comedian like we just turn everything into let's make this funny right whether it's pain embarrassment shame um embarrassment you make it shame anger shame embarrassment you make it like comedy is literally just telling embarrassing stories of yourself or just like complaining about stuff yeah um did you know that you were hilarious i still don't feel that way this isn't okay i'm i don't mean to brag but like i've recorded hundreds of episodes of with the best comedians in the world thank you and you are whatever you're about to say no you're you're literally like i feel like i'm talking to one of them that is very very so stop with whatever they're bullshit whatever the other stuff the idaho energy i see you you'll get in through

comedy and eventually you'll do more the serious roles but like jennifer lawrence where like your nuance and part of the movie people might just be like that's fucking hilarious but like it's not this is like a comedy movie yeah yeah that's what i'd like um you know the funny thing about this whole uh tic talk thing like i was like what do i have to offer on it i was like well i can write jokes so i didn't trust that it would work out because of my talents i just trusted that i like i have sort of the the constitution to get up and write jokes every morning like that it was like that's how this will go somewhere because i will be consistent with it but i didn't I wasn't able to, like, trust my talent.

Okay, I love this because you basically were like, regardless, I know I can at least work hard. Yeah. What is, what was your process when you first started off the TikTok? Like, day-to-day in COVID, what are you doing? It was so free back then because I didn't know exactly what worked yet. So I was doing lots of different things. One of my favorite ones that I wrote that is, like, deep, deep, deep, deep in there. Like, maybe my third video, it's like just two girls talking about cauliflower rice.

and I was like that that kind of format was just something that came you know I just thought that was funny like cauliflower rice fucking sucks like let's stop retirement we like it um and then it evolved like I always say there's seasons in the content like in a television show like you can see when I figured something new out and I'm starting to do something different and that's really interesting to go back but it the process is like get up and now it's a bit more structured I will wake up anywhere between 7 a.m. and 11 a.m. Like today, a scotch hung over, as I told you. It was in a horrible mood last night, so I ended up going to dinner and having, and I'm bad at math,

but about 109 glasses of wine. Yeah. And anyways, so I woke up a little later today. And then from 11 to 2 is my time where I make TikToks, write TikToks. And that can also look like just watching TikTok for an hour. that's how I get ideas yeah yeah yeah and then and then you live the rest of your life so you get it over with I get it oh I have to do it and do you really unhealthy I feel like um like constipated in every way if I have not made a video yeah and unless it's my days off which I consider like Friday Saturday Sunday or Saturday Sunday yeah I mean I find with TikTok like you could say constipated but also more like you just I just get a high from it like it's so it's sick

It's truly sick I'm fully addicted I also joke because I was late to TikTok game I was like focusing on my Instagram because my Instagram

was doing well and Instagram it goes crazy I mean now I hate Instagram I mean not Instagram for listening I'm obsessed with you

but you're doing amazing sweetie so like six months ago I was like I got out of a pretty bad depression

and then I was like I just want to start posting, I'm going to post two, three times a day for six months. Crazy. That's a lot. But I do, I'll do like just talking, like I'll think of a funny premise. And I'll just, like, so I'm just doing straight a joke and I'll just like say a concept. And I don't even know what the ending is yet, but I'll go for it. And then like in a month you'll stay on stage. I have like a well thought out bit about it. But I'll use it like to force me to because I don't like sitting down in writing. I also know when things are funnier by saying it aloud. Because you know you naturally,

like I write on stage. Like I'll just say something and then. the pressure to come up with something funny happens where when you're writing it's sometimes it doesn't yeah it doesn't parlay yeah but i mean but but videos like like you do like i feel like it's nice to be written out a lot of the time but it's all like like you probably think a shit also when you're just like yeah recording it and i won't necessarily like you know actually write it but writing for me is also it looks like putting up the camera and then like just saying things yes and then being like oh there's something how good are are you at watching and like knowing if it's actually funny i know pretty much right when i post it

if it'll go yeah and then like from the immediate reaction it well like i mean it's sick like i've got it down to a science now like i'll post a video and within the first five minutes if it's if it's at this ratio i'm like that's gonna hit a million but sometimes ticot will not move it's sneaky and then it starts moving yeah i find that that rarely happens and it is the thing that i hold on so i'm like it'll move I don't go crazy don't worry I'm funny I've had a point um where like TikTok accidentally deleted my account and then like all the data was gone so I kind of had to start the algorithm from the beginning that was recently that sucks dude and they were like oh those are bad it was a bug and I was like okay well hold on no you you owe me compensation no it's because

then then normally like you know you have your basic like number that you hit yeah my basic number basically was like nothing yeah so only so anyway that's my own issues have you ever had a time where the algorithm was tough with you? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. I try not to blame the algorithm. I do. I go, I got shadow banned.

Okay. See, I try not to do that because being like, I'm shadow banned, it's just like, nah, I wasn't funny for that three week period. My friends and I are like shadow banned again. Right, right. Ten videos in a row shadow band. It's fucked up. Right, right.

This guy's shadow batting me, this guy that I just mentioned. No, I will say, like, there have been times where I just think I wasn't in touch with what was working and my writing wasn't working. Yeah. And maybe I was pandering. And whenever you pander, I think people, people can smell it. Can you define what you mean by pandering? By pandering.

I mean, you are creating content, hoping that people will like it. Yes. You know what I mean? But sometimes it's like when I, so I started as a comedy video producer at Betches like six, seven years ago. And I was the first, I was the seventh hire, the first person. But we didn't know how it was going to go. Like they were like, make funny video. And I just learned, like, if you don't hook people in the first five to seven seconds.

Yeah. And by hook, that's also nuanced. Like, a hook means, like, it's funny, but also makes people want to listen more. Like, you can't just have the joke hit too hard in the beginning. And then it has to have the wrap at the end. So sometimes your video could actually be really good. But, like, the beginning wasn't, like, like, hot enough for people to be like, ooh. Totally.

It's so crazy when I'll see, like, a really amazing video with maybe, like, a thousand views. And I'm like, oh, this is so slept on. And it's because, yeah, something wasn't marketed the right way. Yes. What kind of creative opportunities has TikTok brought you outside of the app? Um, uh, gosh, outside of the app. Well, you know, it hooked me up with my agents, you know, with UTA now. And it hooked me up with our publicist, Jade.

Yes, Jade. Jade. Hey, girl. Um, Jade has the sickest apartment. Have you ever been to our apartment? I've only seen it in a video. No, I've not, and she has two really cute dogs. Yeah, they were humping each other on our first call.

Don't love that, brother-sister. I loved it. What do you mean? Why don't you love that? Why don't you love that? Have you ever humped? I'm not going to judge a good dry hump or judge Jade as a mother. I'm not going to mother shame her, but...

Say dry hump again. I'm single. I just envisioned, like, a Justin Timberlake scene when he, like, dry hump. you know what I was like that never mind what there's a scene where Justin Timberlake is dry humping someone in like some corny movie oh and um in uh yep I have it hold on here it is it's called friends with benefits yes yes yes hence of benefits and also the dry humping in Don Don was it Juan Don Don John John John and Joseph Gordon Levitt my celebrity look like pain pain and I do him and Vladimir Putin

I see Vlad more Okay Okay Okay Would it taken Would it taken Jogo Your Vlad meets

Who's the girl You said You get Did I say The CW girl? Oh no I don't look like Nina Debris No you're Nina

Neera means I saw her the other night At Sunset Tower Your Nina and Vlad Had a baby That's good You know what You realize people

Not in L.A. When you name a celebrity No one has a story about them Everyone in LA would be like, oh, yeah, she's get me in line when I gave coffee at Earth Cafe. I just had to come in. Yeah, no, mm-mm, no. Earth's Cafe.

Yeah, faceted. This pod is fast-ed. By Earth. Yeah, I saw her and Sean White at Sunset Tower just over here. Have you been to sunset tower? That's a really wonderful. Dude, I haven't been anywhere. I have to, when I come back, I'll hit you up. I'm basically the mayor, I feel like, of Los Angeles at this point, the nightlife situation, because I go out constantly.

I didn't know that you're a party girly. Yeah, big time. How long have you been a party girlie? I mean, you're Midwest, you know what to drink. I've been a party girl, uh, no, I don't, no, it's, um, it's west. It's weist. Is it west? It's west.

Mountain West. Because I did the game in Colorado and they did not know where they were. I'm not great with geography. I've realized. Like, I don't know, um, oftentimes if a place is a city or a country. What's Tokyo? It's a city. Why are you putting me on the spot right now?

But right, but right, don't you have to think about it for a second? Like it just, it's a little scary. but I'm like New Yorkers are no okay that's a country I almost said I almost said you know when you see those TikToks where they go up to like random girls and they're like who's the vice president and they don't know and people like do so fucking stupid okay I do not judge those people because I'm that bitch that will blank out if you're like tell me the alphabet

I'll be like I don't and I'm also that bitch who would join a cult so I just don't judge people if you don't have done it absolutely She don't walk of their shoes. Yeah, so I've been a party girlie. I would say since high school. No, not since high school. I was pretty chill in high school. I would say college, college for sure.

What is the nightlife scene? What do you like about it in L.A.? It's this thing of like, and I'm just going to get a little poetic here. It's like, care to dance. Go to dance. I'm going to say this thing. It's like when you have, when you're out and you're with your. girls and you're at a place that you love and then you have a sip of alcohol you know a couple

drinks and then things just start happening you know like you're just like how did i end up here with these people and like i love that i love um like the free fall of the nightlife in los angeles like it's very do you have a good do you have a good party group absolutely see that to me is like the core is like if you have that group that's down to do anything yeah my friends are the most fun people I know are they college girls do I hang out with college girls yeah I go out with a bunch of 20 year old and that's my like everyone get your fakes ready and everyone thinks I'm fucking cool but I remember back in the day um literally but did you meet them in college um some of them yeah so you hang out with other actors yeah it sucks

It's terrible. Everyone's so competitive. What do you guys talk about? Ourselves? We talk about ourselves. Okay, so the traditional, like, the comics versus actors, the comics make fun of actors because they say that actors, like, believe in themselves. Oh, it's so sick.

Like, actors are like, I'm going to be a star. Yeah, that's right. And they just, like, have so much belief that they're the greatest. But comics, we all think we're the worst. Like, I'll kill on stage and walk off, and someone would be like a good job. And I'm like, it's not like that guy in front. fucking hated me and it just like we all hate each other but i mean not hate we we root each other on but we hate ourselves um but it's both competitive but yet actors have this like i know it's it's a bummer

it's almost toxic positivity pretty and i know they say it's hard but like it's a toxic positivity that like i don't want to be around i have a friend who's so fucking toxicly positive and i have to call her out and i'm like enough of that enough let me believe that i'm going to fail let me i have to believe that because like I don't know how you feel about being someone who's on the internet but I think you feel like you're constantly trying to like tamper your ego because you spend all day thinking about your life you know because you're writing well you think about yourself because yourself is your business exactly and that's that gets to you after a while and then yeah you know so it's something that I'm always like trying to be aware of like how can I think outside of the

little world that I've created in my apartment all day long when I go out and I'm with my friends like you know to like just get the focus off myself a little bit but it's yeah it's sorry that might be my little flaw yeah god I'm basically mother dreams so I'm basically my Nobel prizes in the mail getting darker yeah please since I've been psychoanalyzing you the whole time yes through sarcastic comments absolutely I've realized we've decided you're very funny so what the fuck happened to you when you were younger that was so dark that you realized you needed to laugh yeah i can't say that on the internet i i can't say that um but uh beyond that um i i i i don't know we moved around a lot and i um i don't know maybe it was

the not being super popular i think that it's like Obviously, it's not the most important thing, but it does make you feel a little bit like, what's wrong? Like, am I? Well, also, I don't know what Idaho schools are like, but I know that in New York, everyone was very different. And, like, you're kind of cool if you're different. And sometimes in, like, middle America, could I, are you guys middle America? Okay, you're west. So we went over this.

Brazil, go. Brazil. But sometimes in these places, I feel like everyone is alike. And if you're not like. Yeah. If, like, someone just has, like, big tits, then it makes them. Right. Yes. I was just so chronically unique in high school that it was really hard for me. It was really hard. Gosh, no, that's such a boring answer. Do you have anxiety or depression? Yeah, both. Mostly depression, though. Mostly depression. Last night, I was really like, I was like, it's coming on. What happened? Um, so I hit a million. Wait, I love this because this is reality. Yeah. Yeah. This is reality. So I hit a million. You cried. I said, um, I did cry. I honestly

forced those out. That was a very, I was about to say this very actor video of you. See, no comic, whoever hits a million would ever do that. Embrace it. Yeah. That was very actor of you. And I'm not saying in a good or bad way. I'm just observing. You know what those tears are it was like, you know, when the bride's walking down the aisle and it's sad. The husband's like, I have to cry. I have to fucking cry or else it's not going to be good. It was like that. You know what that is? When my fiance proposed because I was like if I don't cry like the moment and I literally I push that shit out like oh no yeah I like farted I sharded and it wasn't like it was for me it was for me yes I started coming I go okay let's FaceTime people

and I was like mom and dad are you okay that is so funny are you okay that is so funny I was like these years are for the fans like shut up you probably could have like not even flinched But I was like, no, I need to let them know my gratitude. My gratitude. But anyway, so I, yes, I kind of, the million hit. And then the next day I woke up and someone who I really wanted to have heard from about it didn't reach out. And I was like, someone's jelly. I guess maybe, maybe.

Someone is protecting their own shit onto you. Perhaps, perhaps. But that is. I also, though, remember when I was dating back in the day. Yes, yes. Dinosaurs were around. Yeah. Old made.

I remember the volatile early relationship emotions where you don't really know the person, but like you obviously want them to be great. So you'll like believe that they're great until they show you not. And then it always fucking hurts. And it's a very druggy dopamine thing. Yeah. But also like, I'm telling you. don't waste time like oh well should i've said the right thing or should i say do this or i should

trick them or whatever like with the right person you're you could literally burp an entire podcast and they'll be like that girl's great yes yeah no and um that's the thing about dating man it's so um i have a hard time with it because ultimately everything must like conclude right whether it's you're giving them the decency to to send it to text like I did the other day, cringe, or ghost, or you date, or you get married, or they die. Honestly, a successful relationship is one of them dies because that means... Or one of them ends up chopped up in your basement fridge. That's right. That's right. One of them ends up as your lampshade. One of us is going to come a lampshade, so let's fucking see where it goes. Right, right, right. Ods are

him. He's giving... What's your type? Beautiful skin. Tall, but like a funny tall. Yes. Yeah, not like a serious tall. No, a goof, goofing, tall goofing. Side note, I'm upset at you. Why? Because I...

You have great skin. Thank you. And I even looked and it was an article on the cut that was like your skin routine. And then I'm like, you're fucking 26. Yeah. You've only been the sun for like three days. That's right. I hate the sun.

I don't like the sun. Well, that's probably why you're skin. I'm so good. But like, can... Yes. Yeah. Can we stop promoting skin care routines of girls under 27? That's a really good point.

And I'm not trying to tag to you. This feels like it's about Haley Bieber. Is it? Actually, how old is that bitch? 25. Oh, I'm done. I'm fucking done. Oh, I'm going to rant about this for months now.

The thing is I really do like Haley Bieber. I like her too. It really is incredible. Her skin is incredible and I just got her stuff. But is it or is she just 25? That's a good point. This seems like this could be a special, a Netflix special. You just say, if she's hot or is she just 25?

Exactly. And then like the whole glow smoothie, I drank it. I'm like, I'm still sad. And also, this is coming from someone with amazing skin. I have amazing skin. I'm part of time. I'm going to be great. Don't worry about me.

I'm just saying in general. How old do you think I am? Well, you thought 26 was young. So you're 31? 30. You're 30. But I'm turning 31 in August. Okay.

That was good. this that was good but I'm also I'm trying to normalize like not trying to be like younger it's like why can't we just like look just yeah just be our age because you're going to get to a point in your early 20s you don't want people to think you're younger because you're young and then you're going to hit a year where suddenly you go oh you thought I was younger yeah and that'll happen in about two years how just so fucking weird the thing is as I'm getting older I'm finding it like such a like a relief oh I love getting older it's really nice but you know why i like it because i actually i'm a bad partier ah i'm in my head me more about

that yeah i'm in my head as a partier like i'm i've always been very like result-oriented person that i've worked on i'm getting better at but i'll like go out and if like if the guy i like isn't there or like the friend group isn't like what i feel is right the energy's not there what i have to do tomorrow is bugging me like i will overthink anything to be like why i shouldn't be there but this happened at a young age at like 17 i'd call my mom and be like i shouldn't I'm not allowed to go to this party, right? Like, I never wanted to go to parties. I also have social anxiety in large groups.

I love a one-on-one. I love a one-on-two. Maybe one-on-three, thrurop a moment. Yeah. But, like, party, that gets me immediate anxiety. Crazy. And I also don't drink a lot. Yeah.

Well, maybe that's why I don't have as much because I drink a lot. I have very bad social anxiety. So, yeah, I'm, like, definitely having a glass of wine before the date. Yeah. Yeah. I am pretty much the opposite. Like, I'm, I'm, I'm giving myself reasons, like, you know, why I should go out. I'm like, I'm going to have a podcast tomorrow.

You got to tape an audition in the morning. You got to do a TikTok. Go out. Absolutely go out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's so funny because I will literally come up with, I'm like, it's windy.

I can't go out. It's windy. I'm wearing my Marilyn Monroe dress. And it'll blow it up. I can't. Oh my God. It's so fucking funny. But I'm similar to you, though, where.

I actually, I'm like full on both anxious and depressed. Uh-huh. So, yeah, it's truly a dynamic duo. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel very attached to my depression. Do you feel that way? She is, she's like, I feel ashamed of her because I like her. Yeah, I, exactly.

Like you're embarrassed that you go, I have my cat. Do you have a cat? No, but everyone just told me not to get one because I have a small, apartment and that it would smell and it would be sort of a sort of a I know who everyone is but delete them as friends unfollow mute um cats are the cleanest animals in the world they clean themselves every day and you get a nice litter box that's like very modern nowadays and it won't smell like yeah you'll smell the cat food when you open it up and then they eat it yeah you also start to associate the cat food with like love and your cat and happiness so do you have a cat then

yeah couple yes yes yeah I have one. My mom has four. But, like, they were mine. What, oh, five. Oh. Yeah. No, four, but, like, five together.

All right. Long so short, you need a cat. It's really good for your mental health. But the problem is cat's love depression. Shut up. As then, like, you lie down on the couch and you turn the TV and your cat is like, girl! Girl, we're out here in these streets.

And she will cuddle up. And, but they help you because instead of feeling alone and really sad, she will purr, like, my cat knows my anxiety and she'll go on my chest. purr. That's really sweet. But then you're not going anywhere because you're in like a full like love embrace. Not me. I'd be like get off bitch. I got to go to cafe Stella. And also, but they say petting a cat lowers your anxiety and like it also gives you that moment to get out of your own head. But and also it is good for your TikTok content. You'll have like so many more like little cute moments. I get a content cat? Yes. Every like hawkerel on the east side, which is like what we

called like Silver Lake area has a cat yeah and dresses like a grandfather and is like the hottest bitch alive that is is yeah that's what I want yeah I'm like that's what I want to attain um really good vibes um that's yeah I guess that's kind of what I want but I feel like most podcast turns into me like trying to convince people to get cats could get a cat and that's not healthy for anyone I'm like a cat missionary my cat my best friend I'm a pusher I push her I push people my best friend page it's taken me four years and she broke like she literally was like I don't know why but um I think I want a cat yeah because I do it I put I'm settled then I'm not settled I'm subtle it's a whole thing you want a baby soon I never wanted a baby but now that I'm married I'm like I've I basically

you know like before you get married you're like we're just snorting plan B and now I'm like is that look down sure um I did take plan B the night after my wedding Are you kidding me? Yeah, because I just like... Are you not on a... I'm on birth control, but I'm chaotic with it. Perfect. And the week of the wedding, I...

How are you going to remember take a birth control? You're getting married that week. Um, I just... Things were like crazy. Whatever. Lots of admin. I literally was spotting and I was like, why the fuck am I spotting in the morning? And I was like, no, I should not be having my period right now.

Did he drive you to CVS? That was our honeymoon. That was our honeymoon? But we had a moment. I said, if you want a baby, like this is... This is it. Like, I'm like, I'm like, I'd look, check. the app it was like the circle it's like you are an ovulator good for him i can't imagine having sex

on my wedding night i've always like it wouldn't be happening he like weirdly had a goal for it i'm like like he took me off the bar i was dancing the bar i'm so much from my friends just decentering men from my life and he was like we're coming home with me yeah yeah yeah we'd be fucking and he's also sober so i'm like drunk okay and enjoying life amazing that's why he looks so lovely because he's sober yeah yeah but he was fun at 18 he was he was fun you knew him when he was 18 no but I saw photos I was in kindergarten yeah yeah yeah yeah that actually I do just say I think I said it on the pod but I we both gave speeches and were both comics and he was like killing his speech like murdering laughs for a minute crazy and I'm right after him and he even joked because I was

looking at my phone like I was trying to take it in but I also realized I had to follow him and I was not about to bomb following him sure and he's like she's like she's like she's like she's like she's looking at her phone because she's getting ready for her speech and everyone's laughing so then I get up and like it was kind of starting slow but I did on our purpose you got to get the mood back down that's right for a play make them think for a play that get some tension is she is she going to bomb she can bomb that's right and then I was like I'm so sad that I didn't get to experience a lot of things in life with him that he's experienced but it made him who he is today and like I sometimes I do wish I met him in college but then I would have been in kindergarten

and it was a mic drop moment but it was I mean it was longing for let's be honest Yeah, absolutely. We're going to wrap it up. It's a game. Hell yeah. A joke game. It's actually not a joke game. Is it a rapid fire thing?

No. Okay. Honestly, it's just questions. But I like to... Weird rebranding. She's going to love this. Let's call it a joke. She'll eat that shit up.

It's called The Seven Deadly Sins. Great. Seven Deadly Sins. What are you greedy about? where i go out that is so funny yeah but are you also that person that'll have a random month that you're like i don't go out anymore no okay yeah um i i mean location wise like what's my friend i will not go to the west side i hate it so much can you give me three places i have to go out cafe stella this podcast is sponsored by cafe cella tenants of the trees and lolo what's your vibe

right now for the place. I wanted to feel like I'm in someone's really well-designed living room, dimly lit, real candles, a bartender who's like a little mean. Yeah. Every median age 35. Okay. Um, uh, you would love going out in New York. I'm sure of it and I do. And I do. And I do. And we'll go out and you'll see. What's your drink of choice right now? Um, orange wine or tequila soda. Please don't roast me. I've never even tasted orange. wine. It tastes like everything you would ever imagine. Do you like wine in general?

Yeah, I do. I just brought you two bottles of wine. Yes, you did. I want, I could see you starting an alcohol line. Yeah, I would be open to it. Or the silly girlies. Silly girlie. Yes.

Yeah. And you would just do like tons of funny videos promoting it. This is what I'm. Yeah. I'm manifesting it for you. Kendall Jenner. Yeah. You're just on a horse and like.

Oh boy. Was that brutal? God bless her, but that was wrong. I'm like, do you have a feather in your hair? That was crazy. I'm like, but they always recover from it. Like, I think the company's doing great. Yeah, it's good tequila.

I have to say it's very tasty. Yeah, they say it's one like wine taste test and stuff. I want to do a TikTok. I haven't like thought it out yet, but about girls who just like about how liking sweet wine is so down upon. Like everyone is cool, drinks dry wine. But like I want to drink grape juice. Like I want Manashevitz.

Okay. well then you would like orange wine or like this whole natural wine thing because it is very like apple juicy kind of thing yeah yeah i know it sounds like such a dick thing to say but it's so good i love i used to like love hating la culture and now i love like embracing yeah you ever go out in brooklyn it's all natural wine yeah yeah yeah okay williamsberg yeah um who are you envious of who am I envious of and it could be a type of person too I'm gonna go

someone just like ran through my mind and then disappeared maybe Kaya Gerber that's a horrible answer she's just dating the hottest guys right now she was right now she's with Austin Butler and before that she was with Jacob Alorti and yeah but let me change that answer

I'm jealous of probably like yeah maybe Jennifer Lawrence she's got kind of all of it going on right now I do think like to be so successful that you don't have social media is like the ultimate flex it's so that's like oh you're so famous that you have peace yeah yeah really you know and she just had a baby and she's got her man's now I think it's totally hot um yeah she's I jealous in like a really um non-toxic way though like I would just really I just admire her so I guess I didn't answer the question you would lampshader no that was a good answer and also like jealousy has sort of a negative connotation I do also say I want to say though like with the like jealous of girls with the hot guys thing and jealousism like oh like I aspire

yeah like go off yeah it's like a lot of these dudes especially the famous ones and you probably know this it is intolerable to actually like date them but like aesthetically it looks cool and it's like good for your career i've never dated a hot monsters never dated a hot guy who i who i felt like respect for um yeah no i was i was gonna say there wasn't some like blaring blaring like hole or something missing like you know um good people you know like all my exes are good people but yeah i didn't realize that like because i would get distracted by tall very handsome men like i'm oh yeah very shallow with men i like to collect them like like i think it's feminist to be like have like male models and athletes around you um i get a more i literally try to be like i'm pretend

i'm like a pimp that's awesome but then like you're a feminist i'm a feminist icon yeah but then you don't realize like that they're boring because you're like so buzzed by like the high that they're hot and successful and maybe like rich or famous and then you're like it takes so long for that buzz to go down and then you are empty yeah yeah what are we gonna truly what are we gonna talk about in the back of this uber for the next 20 minutes oh shit you know it's literally been in uber rides that i've been like that you realize you have to be you have to be out of the mind like you have to be away from your friends because you i i get off on the um the gaze like knowing that like how we look and it's fun and then you're fucking just stuck listening to their thoughts it's

always in the back of the back of an uber is for realizing you hate someone and for secret crying a silent cry a silent cry late at night yes yeah yeah yeah yeah well what was the question what what are you what do you gluttonous about what are you overindulgent that's a great question um oh maybe uh social media media right now do you give yourself a little bit breaks or no um i'm really good about not being on my phone when i'm with people and on the weekend i'm really good about that but um i feel like the week is yeah like a binge do you post your your ticot reels on your instagram some of them some okay this is so sick but i'm just like you know You know, Instagram, it's so integral in dating that I get self-conscious about posting, like, my really, where I look really shitty.

Some of them in my TikTok videos, like, the ugliest I ever look is on TikTok. I don't know why. Do you know what's crazy? Where are you more loved? TikTok. Because you're, like, being authentic. Yeah. People get your energy.

They don't, if a guy does not want to fuck you because you have a weird angle in a video, he's not your man. That's so true. I mean, did my husband message me the other day and be like, let's work on our lightings, lighting and angles? Because I posted it. Well, he's also the vain one. Well, he, yeah. And I was, I purposely, like, being relatable is really important to me. Yeah.

Be really, like a relatable queen. Yeah. As you can tell. Yeah, we're dripping in diamonds. Oh, I'm literally dripping sweat right now. Yeah. But, um, this is sweating diamonds. But, like, I'd, I purposely, yeah, I just think the guy that's going to fall in love with you is not going to pick you because he's like, she.

her face is so fucking symmetrical he's like oh my god everything about this girl's magical everything it's true that's the second time you've reiterated this to me what are you saying I well you know but I do think when you're you're in L.A. you're younger you're partying it's so easy to be like I need to be so fucking hot to get a hot guy when with you you are fucking hot and you know it's even hotter when you're not always like scared to look ugly yes yes because that is the ultimate confidence you brought that up because I like I say this all the time that with the TikTok journey like I've never been more aware of my flaws physically than I have being on the internet because people point them out and at the same time I've never had better self-esteem yeah um because I always you're yourself

yeah and also it's like what's inside my mind and my jokes that's that is it stays the same if I saw your Instagram why would I follow you you know but you've literally become a best friend in my head of the way you yeah the way your mind works and I think with people there's a certain type of person that's successful on instagram there's a certain type of person that's successful on tic-tok you don't see a lot of people do both unless if they're literally posting their all their reels on it which i haven't done yet because i feel like my instagram following is like different yeah i yeah sometimes it looks a little cloudy yeah i'm like it's just not like i'm like a great aesthetic anyway when was the last time you experienced extreme wrath or anger

this weekend oh yeah you're like give me more orange wine you angry bartender um let's not tell that story let's not tell that story

best not to you know drag these people um no I um extreme wrath or anger incredible and I feel like that's not my go-to you know what I had a situation where I felt extreme wrath or anger

And I swear to God Just stomping down the street Like listen into bad blood Someone took some information Some very personal information And shared it with a very popular internet Or an Instagram Gossip page

Oh no And I was like okay Did you know who it was? I don't know who it is I have a suspicion now And I was like How dare you Because you know how upsetting

This situation was for me and you just, you just shared it. That was really. I mean, that's called, you're done. Yeah. Like, that is so scary and, like, you feel so vulnerable. Yeah. And, like, that other person is literally just doing it for clout, which is so disgusting.

But the thing is, what cloud are they getting? It's anonymous. So it's to take you down. Yeah. This person does not, this person wants the worst for me. And it's always the ones who are closest to you. Yeah. And I was like, okay.

You, you know what you just did is you just ruined it for everyone. because now I don't know who I can tell information to if it's going to be like this. You're going to calm out? I'm not certain of who it is, so I can't. I will probably never know. And that is scary. Because you don't think they would own up to it. Of course not.

Oh, yeah, not. Of course not. Dude, the anonymity of these things are so horrible and toxic, and then no one is held accountable when they're lying. Because, like, someone recently came out that Des and I broke up, because I hadn't been posting him on my Instagram because the whole reason was because I actually just don't

I don't like people in our business I just kind of want to protect him a little bit and my social media is not for me to show off is for me to like sell comedy tickets absolutely so like the fact I hadn't posted him in a while and he hadn't posted me was like a deliberate thing that we decided it's not like we we started hating each other right

and then like everyone like my fucking friend at the gym texted me like oh my God I'm sorry you broke up with your husband and I'm like I'm on a ski treat with him you're like I'm having sex with him literally his dick is inside me right now anyway um what was last time you were a sloth what I want to being laid what's the last time you just climbed a tree um I want to say for you specifically what's your hangover cure just being 26 or what's the deal no I get brutal hangovers brutal what do you do was it for famous people um yeah for for athletes

do you follow sports at all yeah you're like look at my address do I follow can you tell me any um yeah DeAngelo Russell yeah um um um uh Romeo aquara Detroit Lions um would okay football guys did you have to eat have like a ton of food yeah oh yeah oh yeah yeah they were eating like 3,000 calories a day kind of thing I mean I get it depends on the position high fat high protein this is a sports podcast yeah absolutely I mean if it's a line man who and it's funny it's such a sick joke that I was that because like can you imagine a person like more ill-suited to be a private chef to young athletes like I mean just think about it I love how that was what you your niche yeah what are some of your favorite things to make right now for yourself um I like meat I like to cook like like a slow like a braise a braised meat

that you shred Turned on right now Put that in a little taco And then dip that And some of sauce Sour cream Absolutely Sour cream

Sour cream Sour cream Sour cream Sour cream Or cream Yeah I like meat I like cooking meat

I don't know There's something Something sexy about that What's your nationality? I'm a white girl I'm just a white girl I'm Italian Oh okay

I'm Italian and Irish Born and alcoholic Yeah You're Italian, they have Italian Irish people in Idaho? Um, so, I guess so. I guess so. I wasn't, I wasn't born in Idaho though. Where were you born? Baltimore, Maryland. Okay, that makes more sense. Yeah. Um, I'm have Italian and then like European mutt and Des is Irish. You have a great joke. Hold on about it. You're like, I'm Italian and I am Irish. I go, I'm Italian and I'm Jewish. And I'm Jewish. Some people call my pizza bagel and other people call me a slut. I literally, that is like, but it's like, but it's like, but it's like, but it's like, I'm Jewish. I'm Jewish. I'm Jewish. I'm Jewish. I'm a horse. I'm Jewish. I'm Jewish. I'm a and other people call me a slut. I literally, that is like,

but it's not that it's like hacky, but it was like, it's very New York. Like pizza bagel, it's like very common. And I literally just like, I was going to say some people call me annoying and I was like slut. The video blew up, but not in a way where you could see it because people were just duetting it being like,

I'm Mexican and this and some people call me this. And so you don't even know that the duets are happening, but everyone saw the video. It's so fucking weird. Yeah, it sucks when when somebody, like it gets more successful than you on your off of your but they also they cut my my joke and put their own so it looks like i'm just a dumb ass being like young people come me a piece of bagel but we're over it we're like totally over it's over it um how's your ego when was this time you let your pride get in the way of something uh wow amazing question um you know i i think uh with dating

but you know maybe that's just a healthy thing because i um i i think I am finally realizing my worth and having a little bit of an ego is helpful with that, a healthy ego, being like, you know, oh, I'm not actually going to accept this behavior. I don't have to. I really don't have to. 26 is a really good age. Yeah. Well, I mean, everyone pops at different times, but I, when I was 26 was when I first started my career in comedy.

Like, I was in marketing. 26 is when you start really figuring out what brings you joy. and then I also like started to understand dating more where everything wasn't this new crazy thing and you start to be like okay I guess I get the process I see the red flags a little more not that I listen to the red flags but things aren't making sense and I just think 20s you don't understand anything and it's like just try everything because by the time you're in your 30s you want to have the right people around you and know what brings you joy absolutely yeah yeah because you're not supposed to know what brings you joy in your early 20s who's your celebrity crush marissa tome

i'm obsessed with that yeah do you love my cousin viny i do i do i really do um and i love you know i loved her in uh what men want did you see or what women want yes it's what women the remake was what men want yes but she was great yeah so marissa tome she's still poppin yeah charlie's their own um and then men let's see uh andrew garfield right now I've got a thing for And Somebody big Oh you know

Nobody knows this guy But I'm going to speak his name So that maybe he watches this Yeah Okay His name is Luke Bracey Do you know this guy

Is he the relationship guy? He was in Holladate Oh no Did you watch Hollidates? Absolutely not Okay He was in the new Elvis He's in that

What's his name? Luke Bracey Look him up right now I just want to see What you think Okay And I want to blow up This guy's spot

because maybe also he's Australian we're just talking about this Australian guys are just like feral love bugs he's so hot yeah he's stupid hot yeah he's on my crush list right now which I believe in I have you know people on my crushes that I intend on dating yeah he's one of them this will be really funny if we do end up dating and we can sort of like oldish clip back okay I manifest he's like a little like he knows he's good looking though which I don't like love um in that photo he knows oh yeah in this photo he has a for himself right there yeah like he I don't yeah I like like fuck him but then just like it's a little smug

don't talk that way about my memory don't talk I'm retroactively so that we can we can show that I was always loyal always loyal you go oh yeah I think I defended you really hard someone was trying to take you down holiday that's right that's right

holiday oh my god oh he did date Isaac Gonzalez that's right who's now with like who she's with someone she dated Timothy Shalame as well. Did she go for her.

She's now with like someone pretty big, I think. Brad Pitt? You're kidding. No, oh no, she's with Jason Mamoa. Shit. That sucks. That sucks. That sucks.

I really believed in him and Lisa Bonnet. That sucks. That makes me upset. You know, when like really epic couples part. But this is my thing. I hate when couples break up and people like, I don't believe in. love and I'm like we actually don't know anything about them you're right do you want to be with

someone else in the industry a little I know it's sick it's like I'm with a comic even though I tell myself I was a little I think that you have a language and an understanding with each other that a lot of people don't like I've tried no I'm going to take that back I have not tried to date anyone else with someone in the industry let just let that be known I have never ever tried but also like the industry is like maybe you go for more like rich producer versus like the guy who's like Yeah I could I could pull a Gwyneth

She's now with I'm a very successful Showrunner I like that I know because Yeah you sometimes Don't want to be in the same part of your career Right you want to be in the same party yeah Exactly like you don't want to Look at him and see the same issues you're dealing with all the time

And you both can't like I don't know Yeah yeah yeah final question Okay That's how I psych way I cut to when I said is this a speed round or is this rapid fire no actually the opposite I let it go in any journey I like that too I really yeah I did a podcast where a host was like really like oh I hate that keeping up in the lines I get nervy I get nervy because I feel like he's actually like listening to all my answers yeah I'm also not being funny then no the funniness comes from a like a third tier riff yes that is like lifted off from a story we were telling 10 minutes ago You can't do callbacks under a speed round.

We're in one right now. I'll ask you a question. You start slow where I'm like, this can go so sarcastic or so deep and I don't know where she's going to go. That's what I've been doing? Yeah. That's fun for me though. Okay. Final fucking question in hell.

Yeah. For the little devils, our listeners. Sure. When you're in the dark, dark is part of hell. What advice would you give to people on how to cope? Coping mechanisms. um really good question i said that to every fucking question even though i forgot to ask you what you did before becoming an actor

don't worry i brought it right up i'm not going to be able to sleep tonight but whatever it's fine um advice for coping in the darkest of time um sleep just sleep a lot of sleep and rest i think is good um for me anyways um not forcing yourself to uh muscles through. I don't believe in that. Sleep. Yeah, people are like, get up and run! And I'm like, absolutely not. You don't want to work out. No, rules. You know, don't work out. You don't want

to do the dishes. Don't. Just rest. And you'll feel it. You'll feel better eventually. Like, you know, I really hate that. Like, again, it's the toxic positivity. Like, yeah, just do something for yourself today. Go for for a while. No. I'm going to postmate and I'm going to stay in bed and I'm not

going to work and I'm going to watch the summer I turned pretty. Yeah. Like everyone is I'm, I'm, I'm, when everyone's watching something, I like to wait, I like to wait. You would. And I want to see if I'm, it's so fucking me, right? It's so fucking you. Sometimes if things are too popular, I get afraid that I, like, I won't like it. Yeah.

Or I don't want to like it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I still never watched Bridgeton. I haven't. I went to the premiere and I didn't watch it. I have blown up in an interview. They were like, who's your favorite character? And I was like, well, you're my favorite guy.

I was like, I had five drinks before I even got here. It was bad. You're like, someone who's British, I don't know. Yeah, I'm like, you sound like you're all from London. Okay, on that note, thank you guys for coming to hell. Delaney, where can people follow you, listen to you, watch you, give me the goods. I'm at Cafe Stella every night of the week.

You have to come out with an orange wine. Okay, I will. Okay, I will. No, just my arm. You can find me at at Delaney says hello on TikTok and at Delaney Row on Instagram. So amazing. You're hilarious.

Talk to you guys later. Oh, I'll also go to Haniburrne.com for my tour dates. I'm obsessed with you guys. Bye. Bye. Bye. and expectations. For example, our most recent episode, I talked to a woman who survived a murder attempt by her own son. But just the week before that, we just talked to the whole

time about Star Trek. We've had other recent episodes about sexting in languages that are not your first language or what it's like to get weight loss surgery. It's unpredictable. It's real. It's honest. It's raw. Get Beautiful Anonymous wherever you listen to podcasts.