Berner Phone - Ellie Schnitt: Haters & Hilariousness

Episode Date: May 8, 2019

Hannah didn’t like Ellie at first, but the two have come a long way. They discuss whether you have to choose to be funny or hot, how Ellie went viral on Twitter, why everyone hated her during college, how many friends you actually need, what it’s like working for Barstool,  how she writes the perfect tweet, her selfie secrets, and that time she was really depressed.Follow Hannah Berner on Instagram & Twitter: @beingbernzFollow Ellie Schnitt on Twitter: @holy_schnitt--- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/appSupport this podcast: https://anchor.fm/berninginhell/support Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to burning in hell. You guys, I'm really excited to be in hell right now because I have no one other than the Ellie Schmidt. People know her as a just Twitter legend. I mean, you're only 22. You're a literal fetus, but you're already reaching legend status. I'm not going to lie, when I first went on your podcast, Shnit Talk, which is amazing. Also follow her YouTube channel, Schnit Talk. She's just killing the game with all the content. You have like a cult following. Well, on Twitter I do.

Yeah. It's also I'm like, we're not introducing you. I'm just talking about how I'm obsessed with you. No, I'm just kidding. Ellie, welcome to hell. Yeah, I'm so happy to be here. So exciting. I didn't think I would ever say that.

But like, I'm very excited to be in hell right now. Well, you are kind of the human version of Tinkerbell, I would say. Yeah, because if I don't get attention, I'll die. Like, I need that. People are taking some photos of us right now, and we're both complaining about our bad sides because I do have a monster side. I do too. I have a side that's like, oh, swamp monster.

Like, she should not be in that photo. Like, when I see her in the mirror, I'm like, who is she? And why is she trying to ruin my life? How did she get here? I didn't invite her. No. That's why mirrors, especially when there's, like, a weird angle and you see a whole side of your face that you've never even seen before and you didn't even know

that was an angle but you know what burning in hell is about being okay with that with the demons with the swamp monster part of us with the demon of our face but speaking of demons when i was first asked to go on your podcast i was like okay i'll do some research on her she's killing it on twitter and i love twitter i think it's so great i know you like twitter i know you love twitter you're like i've seen your instagram um i love twitter because it's like not just people's assholes yeah in your face and like you're hot like you can do thirst traps all day but you actually have a you're like i fully do um but then you have twitter where you don't even use your pretty blue sparkly eyes the people tell me all the time they're like well you wouldn't do well on twitter

if you weren't like attractive i'm like that's just simply incorrect because no that's just like 100% not true because i could change my picture to a picture of like easy mac and i would still do great because i'm funny like that sounds like that's like a dick thing to say it's also like When I see your tweets, I can hear it from your voice. You've created such a unique voice that's still like millennial young woman, but it's Ellie. But it's me. Yeah.

And I think there's so many people who are trying to compete with like what being the funny voice. And it's like, no, just be you. And also, Twitter is very horny. Like, you literally could put a photo of your thumb and guys would be like, hey, I want that in my asshole. Like they, legitimately. They'd be like, I'm an Indian prince and I will do anything for that thumb.

Every day. every day my life honestly i want to find a man who messages me the way indian princes do one day hannah you will find that man you're so sweet but at first i didn't know if i was going to like you oh because people say that to me a lot well people say that they don't like me at first i don't know maybe because i'm a lot um well i liked you right away i liked you right away but at first it was more like i was doing my research and i was like okay so she's 22 she blew up on 12 she blew up on Twitter and now she's like kind of the next big thing at Barstool and she's a literal fetus give her take a couple years she's 22 so like my natural envy of like weird creating content

being funny girls I was like when I was 22 I was still wondering why I played tennis for 15 years and feeling completely lost and scared yeah but then I met you and I literally just I just wanted to squeeze you and hold you and put you in my little pocket did you feel the same way about me I did I just know the same way about you. I really did. I was like, I just like this girl. I just vibed. Yeah.

Because you're real and there's a reason why you're successful and it's not luck. I would say it's, there's a little luck. Just kidding, it's all luck. Definitely like I shouldn't. I don't is like, every day in my life I wake up, I'm like, I shouldn't be here. Like this is so random. Do you ever get imposter syndrome? Every day.

Really? Yeah, yeah. I ever, there are days that I'm like, no, I'm good at this. I know that I'm good at this, whatever. But then a lot of the time I'm like, but there are so many. girls that are funny and could do this that are smart and whatever like why me like why am i here well i think that's our generation is that there are so many funny girls that are great and you know what there's space for us yeah and the more girls that you inspired be funny the more we bring each other up

and i mean you inspire me i just like that you don't have to um put yourself in a box as like i'm the hot cute girl or i'm the the funny wild girl like you have moments where you're really fucking nerdy. And you have moments where you're just like really hot and thirsty. And like everyone has those multiple sides. Yeah. Like I hate that women are so put in a box just in life in general, but especially in terms of who you can be. Like you are either like the hot girl or you're the funny girl. You know, and if you're funny, that means you're not hot or you're smart. But if you're smart, then you're not hot or funny. Like you're you can only be one thing. Right. Like, but I'm not one thing. And I don't think I would ever want to put myself out there. And you're also evolving. Yeah. I'm

22 you know she's so cute she's my little baby like guys guys get to be everything you know guys get to be like I have multiple interests and hobbies and everyone's like of course you do with women it's like you can't like game of thrones because you're pretty like it's like okay well look at the media when you're cast as a woman you're either cast as like the hot girlfriend yeah the funny best friend who's not as pretty as the main girl god forbid the best friend is prettier because then she'll take the spotlight and then you know there's the mean girl and like men aren't cast that way no way men i mean yeah there's always like the ugly funny best friend but but they still have so many nuances to them and i think it's important for more women to realize like being hot actually just

helps you with all the other shit yeah but being hot is like the lowest on the totem pole yeah like i would rather be all the other things that i am than be attractive also i love that you're like i'm gonna start a podcast that's how hot i am i don't you're like i'm gonna start a podcast that's how hot i am I don't even need to be seen. I don't need to be seen. I have a hot voice. What do people, like, have you gotten any weird reactions to when people, like, hear your voice versus when they just, like, read your Twitter voice? Yeah.

People are either like, oh, my God, your voice is so cute. I had a girl tell me she thought I was British the entire time she was following me. I'm like, in what? How? I take that as a compliment. People are witty. Thank you. But, like, I, you're like, oh, you thought I was highbrow.

Like, I'm not sure to talk. I sounded like a bond villain. And that's the tea. Like, no. That was your British show. That was the shut up. You're just like, tea. Tea.

Well, that's a hard word to say in a British accent. I'm trying to imitate Sophie Turner. But I'm a Midwest girl. Like, you know, like. What kind of negative feedback have you gotten? About my voice. Yeah. Like chirpy woodland creature.

Like the assistants in Cinderella. I'm just like, come on Cinderella. Like, it's like my voice. Cinderella, let's go. It's funny because. I don't know why the universe and or God did this to us, but we hear our voices differently in our heads. So when you listen, like, you're going to hate your voice. Oh, yeah. So I feel like it's really tough when people make fun of your voice because you're like, I know. I don't like it

either. There's nothing I can do about it. Tell me my voice is calming, which is surprising because I'm not calm. You're not very calm. Your voice is calming though. If you did like an like an ASMR thing, like I would listen to it. Oh, I did a depression, ASMR and one of, our podcast. I was like, I'm really sad. It got dark. It got weird. But let me, let's go backtrack a little to like one year ago when you were first born. I'm just kidding. I'll stop making those jokes. No, I just love also like you're young and it doesn't mean shit in this day and age because social media is just about creativity. Right. And who comprehends like how people are talking to each other. Yeah. But it's tough though. You know, it's tough being young because I think a lot of

people just automatically don't take you seriously when you're young and you're a girl and you look like I do like I'm like five feet tall I weigh 85 pounds like you're not like you're not looking at this girl and being like she's serious about her career look at this power house like this is not like I am not a power suit girl like how serious are you about your career I'm very serious about my career but then even I'm saying I'm like I'm very serious I'm very serious I'm like L Woods where she's like no I'm very serious about law school like you know like i'm just like people don't don't take me seriously i get it i totally get annoying because it gets in the back of your head even if someone is you're like trying to win them over and compensate so so irritating i'm finally 27 and i think what happens

oh my god now i'm like talking like one of those like old aunts out of party but i i feel like when you're a girl under 25 you get treated so differently but you start like stop giving a shit because you just get disrespected so much that finally you're just like, okay, boys, I don't, okay, think whatever you want to think. I'm busy and we're trying to get shit done. Yeah, I'm getting my life done. And also, like, the numbers are there of your work. I get treated like a little kid, you know.

I really do, but it's okay. You're like, when's your bedtime? Always trying to tell me things what to do. Make sure you bring a snack. Don't forget your snacks. I mean, I'm lucky my coworkers aren't really like that, but I do like in life get treated like a little kid. But you don't let stop you.

No, I don't. So I want to backtrack. So you were born in the suburbs of Chicago? I was, yes. Where? Northbrook. Okay, because I went to Wisconsin, so I've loved friends who were there. Oh, I bet you knew people who went to Glembrook North.

Yes, yes. I mean, some of them were funny. They're like, I'm from Chicago. And then their friend would be like, you're not from Chicago. You're from the suburbs. Which is fun. I mean, it's different. It is just fucking easier to say.

I'm from Chicago. You're not going to know what bum fuck nowhere. I mean, I don't live in bum fuck nowhere, but like there are people, it does annoy when people are like from Streamwood and they're like, I'm from Chicago. I'm like, you're 45 minutes south of the city. like that's not even a thing you know you have to take like two trains and everything is like 20 minutes driving anyway yeah i live 20 minutes out of the city do you miss chicago yeah every day wow you answered that quick you were like i miss chicago i do though you know because i don't know anybody here

like i've only been here for six seven months today so the journey when did you start your twitter i mean i've had twitter since i was 15 like i had to get it for a class when i was 15 and then And I stuck around. Everyone else, like, deleted their Twitters. And I was like, I'm addicted. I like her. You say, there are Twitters. Like, it's like a plural thing.

Yeah. Yeah. They deleted them, but, yeah. But I stuck around. And when did you start kind of being funny on it? Well, first of all, I've always been funny. Day one. Yeah, day one, baby.

She's a day one, bitch. But I think I started seeing it more as, like, a business, like, a career opportunity. When I, oh, God, how old was I? 19, maybe? Like, no, that's wrong. That's incorrect. You're looking at me and I'm like, I don't know right now. It feels like it's been so long, but it's only been like two years maybe.

And I'm just like, it's been so long. I don't even remember. When did it like start popping off? Yeah, I think the end of my junior year of college, so I was 20, yeah. Did a couple just go viral? Yeah, I had like one go viral. And then two months later, like had another one go bigger viral and then bigger. And then I had like 100K one and then it was just like kind of.

Was there talk in your school at all? Oh my God. Everyone hated me. Full on hated me. Really? I mean, obviously not my friends, but everyone else was like, this bitch is so annoying. Like, oh my God, what's she trying to do here? I hate the word annoying because people like to use that word to shit on other people when you're doing something that's annoying them.

But why is it annoying you? Why don't you look at your own past traumas of why it's triggering you? It's annoying maybe because you want that attention and she's getting it so you're annoyed. Because you're not annoying when your shit is making people laugh. Exactly. like that that is the number one thing that I've had to deal with is people being like this bitch is the worst she's so annoying she never shuts the fuck up I'm like you can mute me also you don't have to follow me I'm way louder than you and also not shining the fuck up on Twitter what are you talking about what do you want to do on Twitter be quiet what are people like you posted that for attention what the fuck do you think social media is for I'm sorry like what do you think you're posting for your health you think you're posting if not for attention and I also love how I mean as an outgoing person, your friends are always think you're hilarious with them people who don't like you call it annoying. So it's like, you know what? My friends think I'm annoying, but like,

but we're like the fun annoying. Yeah, like you need us for the party. Well, that's why I tell myself. Me too. As a good sad. Do they even like me? Does anyone like me? This is my depression is smart. Does anyone like me? Um, but have you dealt with bullying with girls before that? Or was this kind of the first round? Yeah, no, I did. And I talked to about this on my podcast, which it's been like very tough, like talking about this stuff because like I don't, I never really talked about it before. But yeah, when I was in college, weirdly, which I always tell people like, yeah, I got bullied in college because I think that sounds funny. Yeah. But that is 100% what happened. But people are always like, college is the best years of your life.

It like wasn't. I mean, it was and it wasn't. Like I think I grew a lot. I think the reason that I am how I am today is because of college. But yeah, my sorority, they were just not very nice to me. I will say a lot of when when girls aren't nice to you a lot of times it stems from insecurity like you know your mom would always be like she's only mean to you because she's jealous and you're like you have to say that because you're my mom

but that's actually true like a lot of times if a girl sees that you are what happened to me was I would be talking like speaking to a guy and whatever girl was like attracted to the guy or wanted the guy or used to date him or whatever would be like she's trying to fuck him and would get mad at me for like being friendly

and it's just like I'm sorry I speak like I'm able to talk I'm not I don't want to fuck your crusty dude like I really don't but it's hard when they're seeing you as like a threat instead of being like oh Ellie like she's harmless she's not trying to do that but it's because they're threatened exactly a different person who's not threatened would just see you talking to a guy and not think twice about it yeah but it's like fucked me up to the point where like I get scared to like flirt with people like I get like nervous all the time where if I know a guy has if if I know my friend even thinks a guy's hot I can't even even being near him like I'll sit there and just be awkward I can't talk to him because I'm so afraid that she's just going to be like don't want to be your friend anymore like don't want to hang out you yeah because you value your friendships obviously more than like some asshole dude and I always have yeah but you don't want to feel like a friendship could so quickly be tarnished just from you talking to someone to a guy I mean they're so not worth anyone's time I've had this thing where it's like if I'm talking a guy and my friends don't think he's hot then I'm like then I'm offended

Yeah, you're like, well, why don't you want to flirt with him? And also, like, I want, yeah, I want Ellie to want to, like, get along with him and think he's charming. Because if my friends think he's fun and cool, then he probably is. He probably is. And if I know that he likes me, I know he likes me. I do think that there's that stereotypical where it's like, oh, you're blonde and you're cute and you're funny. And society can tell you, like, oh, if I'm not that, then I'm not great. And these are their own issues that they have to figure out.

Yeah, it's like not my issue. But, like, when you're 18, 19 years old and people. people are doing this to you. It's like you don't have the like, I'm trying to say like not foresight, but it's like you don't have the distance from it to think like they have things going on with them. Like that's for me now like empathy is learned. Like people think like you have it or you don't, but it's not true.

Like you learn how to be empathetic. Like I've learned based on how horrible people are to me that like I am never going to, my first instinct is never going to be like that girl is trying to do something bad to me or that guy is trying to be a dick to me. My first instinct is always what's going on with them. what are they thinking did I do something that triggered something in their life like I am always the person that's going to say it's probably not me and also right now with cancel culture yeah the reason the way you overcome it is by communicating if you were to do something that in my head I like make a story about to make me mad at you yeah and then I just get pissed off and make people bully you how does that help the situation at all I mean that happens to be all the time on Twitter even oh yeah there's like a whole subsection of Twitter we call them edge Lord Twitter Oh my God, I love that. So this is like worse than trolls?

Worse than trolls because they're people with like followings. Oh. Yeah. Who hate me. Like think that I am a monster. Like think I am the worst person in the world, which it's like you don't know me. You've never met me. And it's so funny if you actually meet me.

It's so funny. But I also think you, it's hard when you're in it. But I'm like, as a wise older person, when you got haters, girl, you are doing your shit right. No, that's why I don't care about it. I'm like fuck you hate me because guess what all you're doing is saying my name more and more and more and making me more of a thing like you can't cancel me because I don't do anything wrong like name a celebrity that doesn't get hated on none none of them it's and it's funny because I my Instagram had been following the last couple months and in the beginning like I was literally just my

friends being like ha ha ha and then like someone was like your face is so ugly I want to throw up and I was like oh you feeling threatened by this shit right now oh you know you can't even see my face because it's only tweets and you still a threatened bitch but i also think in college there's this idea of popularity and also in high school like why though where it's like i have all these friends and sororities adulthood is realizing that you only need like two to three people in your life i don't mean to sound like a loser but i'm so there with you but i only want i'm the kind of person that like i'll give and be very empathetic and make everyone laugh but then i need like two to three people in my life who I can be my most vulnerable, annoying, anxious self. I don't have to like try to be

anything. And I don't feel like I'm ever going to get judged or talk shit about that I can tell my secrets too. And I think in college, you want everyone to like you. You want to connect amazing with everyone. And when one person doesn't, you're like, what's wrong with me? But as you're older, like even in New York City, the way it feels more, more small is that you find like a couple good girlfriends literally more than four starts drama. I'm You've seen sex in the city. I've seen sex in the city. You're not that young.

You just need three of them. You just need three or less, I would argue. I like to have my mom, one girl, and a dude that I rotate. That's like my sanity. How has it been moving to New York? Because after college, you basically get hit up by barstool? Yeah, pretty much right away. What did they say?

Well, I had been talking to Kevin Clancy, KFC, for. a while he but not about working at barstool that makes it sound like no i mean about career stuff but not like barstool career stuff but he liked you as a talent and your humor he was the first very my like first verified follower he followed me when i had 7000 followers cool yeah like a long is he always like scouting talent yeah he's really good at it i don't think he gets enough credit for how good he is at that yeah you don't hear those stories of like how someone emerged also just side note bar stool females are killing it right now it's funny because they always had chicks in the office that did really well and they just were like yep those are token chicks and you're part of that this like new

tapestry tapestry we're still trying to figure out what chicks is yeah but we'll figure it out and I think everyone's trying to find out who chicks are right now like bigger picture like who women I mean I had this I couldn't fall asleep last night so I was thinking about I was thinking about memes I was thinking about memes I was thinking about memes per usual and I was like what I love about meme culture is it's so like men and women are equal in it yeah do you ever think about that like actually female humor you ever see guys like post memes and female humor like about like oh I want to drink wine all day like because they know it's funny but it's like female humor is because stand-up females still don't have the same no respect which is fucked but memes it's all equal baby hell yeah

hell yeah so you're talking to kfc yeah um for like probably january of 2018 i'm i messaged him Twitter Twitter DM i really

I don't know I had had a couple glasses of wine and I was like he's a verified person maybe I could have a job from this I like your blue check I literally DMed him so like what team should I root for in the super bowl

I wish that that was a joke. It was so not. It was 100% what I said, which, hell, you like. I also love that you weren't like, hey, mom and dad, what should I email this top guy at Barstool? Were you thinking about potentially working for him? I knew that he could help me in some way, but I was just trying to, like, network. But you were also, you were being so on brand, too, because I feel like that's what

you would say to a friend. Yeah, I was like, hmm, like, what do I know about him? Sports. What's going on in sports right now? Super Bowl, okay. And then you're, like, impressed with yourself. You're like, yeah. I was like, that was so good.

I read it over, like, actually the other day I was thinking about it. So I read and read it over. I was like, oh, you. Why? Why did he respond to me? Why did he respond to me? He was just, he gave me, like, he was like, oh, it's the Patriots and the Eagles. And, you know, they're both trash bags, but, like, you should vote for the Eagles, whatever.

And then I was like, ha, cool. And then he was like, yo, but so business. And I was like, I've had a couple classes of wine. He's like, text me in the morning and we'll talk a little about what you want to do, like, if you want to do social media as a career. I was like, okay, all right. And I love you saying that every parent rolls their eye, like, oh, social media as a career. And I'm like, and now all parents do is.

Oh, my mom's so proud of me. Oh, yeah, but all parents do are text me, hey, my friend has a dentist office. Can you teach them how to use Twitter and Instagram? I don't know how to teach someone to use Twitter. I don't know. Do you ever get nervous? you're never going to think of another tweet yeah i go through moments where i'm like i i don't know anything i have no thoughts there's not a single time i always want to ask you that because my friends hated on me

because i started twitter in august and i literally was sitting on a couch and i was like hmm i have thoughts because i knew somewhere else was coming out and i you want to have like a little twitter presence because people talk shit about you so you want them to be able to at least like judge you on twitter um to talk worship and my literally i'm going to say like my fifth tweet went viral and then I was just hooked on Twitter so hard not to be and then people are so into it and I hate posting photos on Instagram and obviously Twitter is where memes start yeah so like no one's shit on me for posting tweets on Instagram I can't take it anymore only a couple people do but it's like where do you think fuck Jerry gets his shit from original creators who post on

Instagram I mean fuck those people though oh your shit gets you said you still see your own tweets from like years ago yeah on like my therapist says and I'm like okay like I know for a fact that you're getting my betches is I'm sorry what pisses me off the most because I'm like I know that you're making money off me they never tag me like they never like act like I'm even like a contributor and it's like bitch I rate half your shit for you like what do you like or they just get inspired by it and like reword it yeah like honey I'm like I come on I mean at the end of the day I think that there's a lot of these companies that are taking advantage of

of the original creators. And I think that's why I moved on to be entrepreneurial because I realized, like, I can make my... Exactly. And, but then I have learned that the internet is a crazy place. You cannot control your content. And it's just about continually being inspired for more. But with Twitter, you can't force tweets.

No, and I try. I have, if you saw my drafts right now, like, I write and write and write and right. Like, all, they're so, they're honestly bad. Because I'm like, this is a good idea. just doesn't sound right right now but then if you try and rework the idea out of the moment it doesn't always work i wanted to title this podcast like the art of the tweet because there is an art to it yeah definitely where like it's but this is why i always get nervous if i can't think of another good tweet because i don't have a system it literally just comes to me or doesn't i don't have like a pattern or

like i can't like teach it i mean obviously like i use metaphors a lot and i it's just it's either comes or it doesn't yeah i i i always say like whatever your first thought is like go to C like don't step stick with a don't go to your next thought go to the thought after that that like what makes it more than what it is like you're so right yeah think if something funny happens then it's like you're not saying hey this funny thing happened you're saying this funny thing happened and it made me think of this which made me think of this and that's the tweet yes yeah you hit the nail on the head but obviously you can give the recipe but it's not going taste the same when other people copy it no and I mean but it's about finding your voice like I know

there are things that I can do that make it sound like me like I use all lowercase like I will I'll use more like acronyms like IDK BC like I'll do things that sound a little more casual I use punctuation in weird ways like there are things that I know that will make it sound like me and so I do those things but I don't think I ever I mean when I when I started out I wasn't doing those things it's just like now it's so like methodical for me yeah but I do stress out sometimes especially like so promo kind of like kills your engagement. Like if you're promoting, you know, whatever, I'm promoting podcasts, YouTube, whatever else the frick I'm doing, it kills your engagement because people are just like, oh, it's a promo

which way, I don't want to look at that. Yeah. So it stresses me out because my engagement is so important to me that like I feel like every day I do my promo in the morning and then at night I focus on getting like three good tweets out and it stresses me out because I'm like, I need them to be good because then I know tomorrow morning I have to do I have to do promo again. and I always have shit to promote. So you think that your engagement on the actual tweets

will be lowered if you have too much promo? Yeah, because that's not what people are necessarily following me for in my opinion. Like, I have to do it because I know that's the best way for people to get eyes on my stuff. Yeah. But it just, like, it kills me. Yeah. Because it's not really a personal account, you know? Yeah, and it's funny because I use Twitter as just, like, my workspace.

And then I see which the best ones are. Then I present it on my Instagram because my Instagram is my primary. following but yours is like your that's my baby that's your fucking baby i raise that from nothing i will literally post tweets and then like the next day be like wow i spelled that word wrong and that punctuation wrong and i'll delete it and repost it to like twitter's just where i have my fun yeah it's just not fun for me it's got it no you're right it gets content it's not fun for me it's like be careful what you wait for because like i know everything i'm saying like if i say something the wrong way it's gonna get picked up by this aspect of Twitter and then they're going to give me hate if I say this like

this then like I'm gonna get quote tweeted by everyone from pick me Twitter being like I'm I'm not like this so you should date me like you know what I mean like and I love tweeting like a crazy girl yeah like that's my favorite joke in the entire world my favorite joke is being like an insane person because just women are just really not like that I mean we're not you're not saying I had a tweet once where I was like it like oh my god so annoying like this guy um has like a real job so he goes to bed at like nine o'clock every night which means he can't pay attention to me during prime like attention hours but you know what that is it's not you've been crazy it's a thought that all women have but we never vocalize it because it's so crazy but we've all thought it before

i know we've all thought it so i tweeted it because i thought it was so funny like the idea that obviously i'm not like it's humor clearly a joke like i'm not saying like because and then i got responded quote treated whatever people being like oh my god this girl is the worst like wow like her man has a real job well he should break up with her because she doesn't and I'm like buddy like it is just not so do you clap back or not no almost never oh you're such a classy little bit well you have to take the high road yeah because if you don't like what you're not going to win like if someone hates you they're going to hate you you're not going to change their mind by being a being root to them like that's it's like if you don't like me you're already not going to like i also think if you give energy to it it just gets

larger I don't give attention to when like the big accounts hate on me like there was recently like a targeted attack on me and I had to delete a tweet because I was just like don't need this in my life right now but you know what that's okay you're protecting your energy yeah whatever but like I just didn't give any attention to it I didn't respond comment uh like sub tweet like I just I just don't because I don't need to punch down and like I just like don't need to give them the attention that they so clearly want since you're making a thread about how much you don't like me and you've never met me. I hate when people are like, oh, my God,

Ellie Schnitz, like, a lot of these girls that get, like, bitter and jealous are, like, she's bad for girls. She, like, is saying this, and this, and she's acting like it's okay to act like this and, like, whatever, like, she should be a role model, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, first of all, I am a role model. Second of all, I'm going to let girls be however they want to be,

and that's what I'm trying to show them. But third, if you took one second to listen to my podcast or anything else that I do, you know that I'm a good person. So what is the real problem? And it's hard because you so badly want, be able to communicate that with them yeah but then it's like it's really not worth it because that's just not what they want they're not trying to understand do they're not trying to get on the same page they're just loving that hate but it's also important to know like what you just said in real life though

like when people are bullying you or there's words being talked about you don't punch down no you're above it and they want your attention and also like it's true when you're in those dark moments you want to try to be grateful and just see the big picture of like i have a career i have people in my life that love me i don't give a fuck what people think also like they're hating on you because they're looking up to you there's something like literally looking up to me it's you can't hate punching down you can't it's uh it's inappropriate to be i don't think it's like i don't know math but like i don't think it's like not physically possible i don't think because then you're just being a bully like i'm not going to bully you and honestly like it's cool to be a nice girl i prefer to be a nice girl

It's boring to be mean It literally just gets boring I was a mean girl when I was in like fifth grade Like I was a mean girl That was probably when you were still like kind of tall Yeah no I was still Oh you were always a little tiny tiny yeah Like I grew this is like tall for me

Like I was really grew But no I was so mean like I was just like a bully And like fifth grade sixth grade seventh grade And then eighth grade I was like I don't know I just was like I want to be a nice girl Like I'd rather be nice Like I don't want to be mean anymore it's boring Eighth grade and people are

still figuring it out. I'm sorry. That's just grow up kind of. Like it's so much more fun to be nice to people. You heard it. Ellie Schmidt. It's like grow the fuck up over there. But it's true. It doesn't matter. I mean, I'm dealing with Summer House where I was 26 and there's like people in the house who are 31 to 36. Yeah. And they throw stuff around being like, oh, the girls aren't mature, whatever. Maturity is literally a mindset. It's not an age thing. It's not an age thing. and yeah just like I also have I read this book about experience and success and they basically said like it doesn't matter how much experience you have in a job like doctors who just graduated from school and earned their second year proved to be higher performing than doctors some doctors who were there for like 40 years because they were more passionate and like refreshed on what they were doing so like fuck experience fuck maturity do you boo let's play our first game very excited about this so it's called instaumosity but we also can talk about your twitter so it's also tweet stomosity um this is our first ever tweet stomosity i'm very excited

i talked to the devil about it he was like yes and he was cool with it we're cool for ellie but like don't make this a thing um do you remember one picture on your instagram where you looked happy but you weren't i don't know i have to look i mean am i allowed to look you're on can look. Are there any... I need to be reminded. Is there ever a time that you felt like shit and you were like, I need to get some attention right now? Yeah, every day. Honestly. Your selfie game is very strong. It's very strong. No, I know that it's strong. No, but like your contour and like your angles. I know my angles. Do you have any advice for it or do you think it's just understanding your own angles? No your face.

Use face tune. I mean, like, I think sometimes like, I mean, I'm a makeup person. I'm really not wearing makeup today but like usually I'm a makeup person no you're good at makeup yeah but a lot of times the picture is not going to like do that justice so like make sure you're you know you're putting your best face forward have you ever dealt with depression yes when was the last time you were depressed oh probably right before right when I graduated college it was really bad I like didn't I couldn't like get out of bed like kind of thing like I would go I was crying myself to sleep every night because I just felt so like hopeless. I was like my life is going nowhere. Like I don't know what I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know what I want to do. Was this before barstool? Yeah, this was

because like so I had been talking to Kevin but then it was only like on and off. It was like every couple months. He'd be like, hey, you still doing the social media thing. I'm like yep, still still doing it. He's like you should work on your Instagram. Okay, I would do that. Like, but then we hadn't talked in a while and I just felt like, oh my God, like I'm literally not going to go anywhere. Like I'm not doing anything. I was so depressed. My friends let me take their dog home with me like for a week because I was so depressed they were like worried about me and I cried every night on this dog like so depressing what kind of dog um he's a he's a he's a mom but he's really cute I'll show you pictures later he's the best what jobs were you looking for at

the time I wasn't because I was like nannying um and I hadn't I hadn't finished my degree yet like I still had like a credit so I couldn't really apply for jobs what happened with that credit just like well my advisor I took a class that I thought was like the right credit because my advisor told me to and then it ended up not being the right class like for the credit so you couldn't get your degree i couldn't get my degree i could walk but i couldn't actually physically get my degree so you felt a little helpless and out of control totally by the system i was like well what the fuck am i going to do like i have to now like do this and all my friends are in grad school or already have jobs and like it just was the worst um and then yeah and then how did it affect your content at the

time like were you still tweeting at instagram and one yeah I was trying to. It was hard. If you look at that month, like, I really didn't post much. I didn't post at all on Instagram. I don't think. It's funny. I don't post on Instagram when I'm depressed, but my Twitter game is pretty good when I'm depressed.

My tweet's actually better when I'm depressed. Yeah, because you're like, everything is pissing you off and you realize all these issues. I'm just sad. Like, that's relatable, right? When you're really happy, you just see a lot of like light and you feel light and you're not complaining. And when you're not complaining and when you're not complaining and you don't have a good tweet. You don't have a good tweet. You're like, hey guys, this isn't it.

nice out today and everyone's like go fuck yourself yeah seriously i mean i guess i posted a selfie the other week that i was just like i had like such a bad day they was such a bad day but i just needed the validation so i posted the selfie was the one where i'm in the pink shirt and my hair up it was cute i definitely liked it what made the day so bad oh my god it was one of those days where just like everything was going wrong it was like um found out a guy that i had had really strong feelings for in college was having a baby just i didn't need that um like That's just a human child. Like he's pregnant.

He has ovaries. I didn't know that. I didn't realize that. No, like just so strange. Like he's having a baby. Like it was a human child. That's a Midwest shit. It just seems incorrect, you know.

A bunch of other stuff too that just, I had like a weird. I don't, I don't know if I did that say. But there was like a thing at work that was weird. Yeah. And then another thing at work that was worse and like two or three other things that, oh, it was the one year anniversary of the first time. I hooked up with my, like, X, which came up on my time hop. I was about to say, you should never have known that date.

No, but I knew because it was 420. Like, I was like, I remember it being. Are you single right now? Yes. Okay. I'm all single. You're like, that's my constant. Um, who are you jealous of on Instagram?

I'm jealous of, like, actual Instagram models. When I look at girls, I have these bodies. And it's just like, I know that if I put in like 2% effort, I could probably get myself there, but I just am not that person. I hate working out. But also, you know how much face tune they use. You know, but it's still, it's just like, oh, you like have abs and boobs and a butt. Like, that's not fair. You get to pick one, you know? It's funny because I look at like the psyche of it and I'm just like, oh, why do you feel like you have to post your whole body all the time? Yeah. That's what I think. It's fair. It just makes

me jealous. I'm trying to think of perspective. Because also, like, there's a ton of girls out there who have abs, who have boobs that don't feel the need to, like, show it to the world all the time. Yeah, but I'll tell you if I did. I would just be naked all the time. My mom always tells me, she's like, show your curves. Show your curves. And I'm like, but I want to be comfortable. Oh my God.

When I was in high school, I had like no boobs. Like I have like boobs now, but I did not have anything then. I didn't have boobs until 18. I literally, I swear to God, I had no boobs. And then overnight, I just grew boobs. And everyone was like, are you pregnant? I'm like, no, I don't know what's happening. But yeah, so I didn't have any boobs in, I would always say, like, if I ever had them.

Like, I was so jealous of my friends left, I was like, if I had boobs, I would be, they would be out all the time. I would literally never have them in my shirt. Like, you would always be like, there's Ellie and her cleavage. Like, there would never be a moment they were out. There's cleavage and then Ellie. But now I have boobs and I'm like, I hate them. I like, I want to hide them all the time. You know, life looks better on the other side.

I went to L'A. I went to the Mondrian, which is very sceny. It's like this hotel, and they're known for their pool. but it's like an intimate pool like it's not that big but people go and they just sit around it and these girls sit down and just take their tops off oh and like I'm not offended by nipples at all but it was like a pretty intimate hotel with a restaurant like right there but then I looked and like their boobs were like perfectly sculpted um probably yeah like they probably paid a lot of money and I was like maybe if I paid that's what I'm saying if I'm paying $10,000 for a boob job I will be

topless all the time. Yeah, like it's like if you pay 20 grand for a burkin or whatever, however, I don't even know how much a burkin is. It's like 35. You're going to walk around with it. So that was interesting. Would you date a guy with more followers than you? I wouldn't date someone who, okay, so I'm talking to this guy right now. And I had to do some light stalking to find him on Instagram. I didn't know his last name. Well, that's easy. Right. Like, why would he tell me his last name? No one needs last name's in what situation when i yeah anyways i just need to like get his fingerprint and we're good and we're good yeah so i i found him on instagram after some digging and he has such a trash ratio he has he's

following more people than follow him i'm like what is wrong with you and now i'm like now i'm like i don't know if we i don't know if i don't like guys who follow a lot of people yeah i know because i'm like i bet you're just following insta thoughts and even if it it has to be insid thoughts but even if it's not it's like why are you all up in other people's business it's that and it's also like why you're don't people want to follow you true no that's so true like what's wrong with you it's funny because ratio aesthetically is nice as an influencer you don't want but like it's for a normal person don't be following more people that follow you because it just looks creepy bad and it's not even a don't it's like question yourself and who you are if people do not want

to follow you back maybe you need to talk to your therapist about that and I don't mean that in a bitchy way I mean it in a real way I'm also just not normal on Instagram or like social media anymore where I like don't remember what it was like to have like a normal number of followers so I don't really know like I do you know it's so annoying I have like a pretty wide range of friends so sometimes we'll hang out with this group of people who are all like finance whatever and they go oh the Instagram girls are here and I'm just like what the fuck I don't want to be that I don't want to be that person but then we get there and like we're getting the content and they like it's like your job I hate people don't get that well I just recently got to the number

on Instagram where I can monetize it. But at first, I was like, nice. But they get it when you're like, uh, I need to keep up my engagement because it's paying my rent. Yeah. Like if it's your job. How do you think, ooh, I like this question. I like to compliment myself on my own podcast.

I like, yes, yes, you're killing it. I do too. How do you think your real identity is different from your Instagram identity? I mean, specifically Instagram or just social media identity. Let's do social media because Twitter is a huge facet of your life. I try to be as close to me as I can be because I think authenticity is what's sustainable. I think if you're pretending to be someone you're not, it's not going to be sustainable. Like you have to try to stay authentic.

I will say it's like me on steroids though. It's like me at the most like out there version of myself. And especially like. Yeah, even your crazy version on Twitter is the realist like that's really like my That's the shit that you would suppress in person, but then you need to write about it because you know everyone else has thought it. Yeah, it's like I'm trying to make it okay for you to be crazy. Also, let's be honest, Twitter is your thoughts. It's not shit that you're telling people.

It's literally how your mind is working. For me, people do read it like, oh, this is what you're telling girls like you should be doing. And I'm like, they can interpret it like that if they want. She looked at her nails. As she said that, she's like, whatever. It's, yeah, people can interpret however they want. And that's because we make art. Yeah.

That's art. I am art. I love your work. Danny DeVita. I love your work. It's time to play The Seven Deadly Sins. I'm excited about this. Seven Deadly Sins.

Sorry if I keep scratching myself. There are mosquitoes living in my apartment. I don't want to talk. I don't know why. This is fame, guys. This is fame. This is Twitter fame. 22-year-old-person apartment.

And so we have mosquitoes that come out of the drain and eat us in our sleep. That's my literal nightmare. I would go at least I would do it in Puerto Rico. Like if I'm getting mosquitoes, I need to be in Puerto Rico at a beach. What? It's on my face. I'm like, at the point, I lit a citronella candle last night. So I was just like, please don't bite me.

My face is important. Do you live above a Chinese restaurant or something? No. They come up through the drains. They live in the cell, like the sewers. That literally makes me so nauseous. And anyone who thought about moving to New York City, is now like noted like you can get the city has to is going to come exterminate them because it's like

their problem yeah that is their problem yeah i lived above a chinese restaurant in college and cockroaches became my pet luckily i have no none of those yeah knock on one because they're smarter than us i'm probably going to take over the world soon okay what are you greedy about i can be really greedy with food sometimes oh i love that like i will never give someone the last piece like that's mine like if i see that there's good snacks in the kitchen like i'll hoard them like i'm i can be greedy with that um I think it's funny because people wouldn't assume that you'd be the one that's like finishing the pizza. So you probably get away with it.

And I was in third grade. My third grade teacher called me greedy because I ate a piece of gum. Like she gave us all sticks of gum. It was like that green apple gum, you know, that everyone's obsessed with it. Oh my God. You know what I'm talking about. Yeah. And then it would in like two seconds.

Be gone. No flavor. Yeah, no flavor. But she gave us all stick of gum. And I didn't wait for her to say, okay, you can eat it now. I just like ate it because I gave it to me. I want to eat it. And in front of the whole class, she was like, you're greedy, Ellie.

And that really stuck. with me i have never forgotten that no those things stick with you because she came at your character yeah my character and in front of everybody too and then i had to go to speech to work on my asses and i cried in the speech room you know what those things shape us and um whatever her name is she can go fuck herself i think she's dead i don't think she's old yeah i like how this got dark rest in peace mrs fruity mrs frady maybe shouldn't talk shit she didn't talk shit also how you like me now swallowing the gum was an interesting choice but i'm not going to judge you by that um um Who are you envious of in general besides Instagram thoughts?

I'm really, I'm jealous of people who can, that don't like have anxiety and don't overthink everything. Like, I can't imagine what it would be like to exist in the world and not be constantly thinking, everyone hates me, I'm doing something wrong, what I just said was stupid. Like, I can't, like, I can't imagine what it would be like to just be like, yeah, I'm going to dance, I'm going to get drunk tonight, I'm going to have fun, and not wake up in the morning and be like,

I want to jump off a bridge. It's so funny because your anxiety is like obviously your downfall sometimes, but it's also what makes you so good at what you do. Yeah. Like I joke with Twitter. The reason I like is because I have so many thoughts and a lot of them are just crappy, shitty, bad thoughts, like OCD obsessing. But then occasionally there's a funny fart joke that I get a lot of retweets and I'm like,

yes. But it's like it's our thoughts that we have to learn to control. Or at least not even, you can't control your thoughts, but learn how to react to them. Yeah. learn what to give energy to. That's what I work on a lot, but it's just, it would be nice. But it's also great, like, what do I do? It's great that you're 22 and you said you're going to therapy.

Oh, I've been in therapy, yeah. That's amazing. I mean, like, yeah, you should be in therapy. Everyone I know should be in therapy. I've never met someone who shouldn't be in therapy. It's like going to the gym. You go to the gym, go the gym for your mind too. Work out your brain.

Was there something that happened that made you think I should go to therapy? No, it's just my anxiety has always been really bad. And like, it got worse, like senior year. and then I was like, I can't live like this. Does it run in your family, exactly? Yeah, it does. That anxiety of like wanting to always be like a people pleaser, like whatever. Like I have it and I have friends that aren't like that.

They'd never assume that people don't like them. They never assume that something's gone wrong. I'm just, I'm fascinated. I'm fascinated by like different high performing people. Yeah. And that's what I started this podcast about to get people that people looked up to in different forms. But you'd be so surprised how consistent that like type A anxiety is within this.

kind of person that wants to be high performing. It's kind of like we have like this constant dread. Inner monologue of you're not good enough. You suck. You're the worst. So it's like we we constantly. So I almost think that you know, you getting a tweet that blows up to a person. It calms it. Yeah. But to a person who doesn't have anxiety, they probably just need like to see someone they like and they get a smile. So like we need a little more to like shut the voices up. And I need it from my friends like my friends don't do this my friends from home do because they know me well enough now but my friends like here like they don't know that I need to be constantly told hey I don't hate you I'm not mad at you I love you like I need that like every day it's funny I have a friend like that too that like

if I don't tell her like I literally love you so much today she's like hey are you mad at me no I'm like but I kind of love our constant love and like openness where I have some friends they're like hey what's up fuck tard and I'm like hey you little slut right but like what I've noticed about East Coast people is they're not they're not really like I love you like we're good you're okay you know I like you if I make fun of you as then I literally walked in and was immediately just shitting on you and that means I'm comfortable and I like like like your energy but it's just so different for me because I'm not used to that when I moved here I moved here I was like everyone's a fucking asshole out here I tell my friends I'm like they don't do um small talk they have no social

responsibility like so funny it's very we either do no talk or deep talk like we're very transactional with certain things. It's so weird to me. Like I'll be walking to coffee with someone and just silence and I'm like, are you mad at me? Like, why aren't we talking? And then I'll like say something and it'll be like, but then in the Midwest, I never know if anyone's mad at me because they're so good at just being like, hey, how are you? You'll never know if I'm mad at you, ever. So we'll never act like I'm mad at you. That's fucking dangerous. And also I remembered after our podcast on Shint Talk, you guys should listen to it if you haven't. Literally right after, you feel connected after a podcast, but I looked at you and I'm like, how's New York?

How are you feeling? And you're like, it's really tough. I'm scared. I was like, you're going to be okay. You're so strong. And I was like, we were like in a bathroom at the club. I was like, you're fucking beautiful. You're so pretty.

Like we had just met. And then like we literally just, we started DMing about murder documentaries. Yeah. That's when I started to like get some like feelings. Feelings for me. I was like, I'm having feelings. But that was nice. Okay, what are we?

I'm like, I don't even know where we are right now. envy we just said envy oh yeah you're smart when you were saying like you need validation from friends i don't need any validation from anyone except for like the three people that i depend all my emotions on i'm learning about myself well i'm like that too but i need my but you need it and i started seeing this guy and it's like if i tell you like something that i kind of fucked up with yeah it's not for you to be like yeah you fucked up it's because i it's because i need you to say it's going to be okay And we got in the stupidest fight because I was like, hey, like I said this and like so-and-so got kind of mad at me, but I didn't mean it. And he was like, he goes, yeah, you shouldn't have said that. And then I like, that's not what I need to hear. He was like kind of being funny. But then like, and I was, it was too late for me to start a fight. But then I kind of in my head was like repeating it. And then the next day when he was on the phone with me, I have this new thing where like I never, I will hold shit in unless I say it. Like it's therapeutic for me to say it to people. So I literally just like, hey, in that moment, I'm not. saying it to you just to like gossip I was saying it because I just wanted you to comfort me

and he was like okay this is my guy voice I talked that's really good but honestly I was kind of more proud of myself for noticing that instead of internalizing it and breaking up with him four months later for no reason no I've been really working on like the communication thing because no one teaches you how to communicate no one teaches you about sex or communication which are the two main parts yesterday I got a DM from someone who was like I've never been more sure of anything in my life than the fact that you don't know how to fuck I was like what I mean that's a bold assumption you're not incorrect but like it's bold but also I was just last episode um or a couple episodes ago I was talking to Sydney Washington

who's a lesbian and she was like fucking is so easy when you're a woman with a dude like he literally can masturbate with your vagina and if he's like obsessed with you you literally don't have to do shit anything so it's like that sounds like maybe he has his own issues And your vagina's on a pedestal, and he's mad that he will never touch it. But, no, yeah, I get weird shit all the time. So, I can't even imagine. So next question is, what do you gluttonous about besides food in terms of, like, that you will overindulge? Oh.

And it could not be a physical thing. Honestly, it's like tragedy porn for me. Like, I'm so, like, crying and, like, being upset and, like, feeling things. Like, I will, I mean, that's like my main thing in life. Can you define tragedy porn for the listeners? Right. So it's like, you're like, I've been waiting for this moment. It's like when you just want to feel something, so you intentionally watch a sad movie

or listen to a song that you know reminds you of your ex or like look at old pictures from when you were happy and skinny. Okay. I have a phobia of that. Really? Like when I go through a breakup, I will not listen to music for like two months because I don't want to be triggered by anything. And I don't think it's healthy.

No, because I get unhealthy with music. Like, if I am just talking to a guy, I have just met him. Yeah. And I listen to Taylor Swift at any point in, like, the two weeks period of, like, meeting him. It's over. I'm fucked. I'm done because I've already created the love story in my head. Like, that's...

Well, I do, like, if I meet a crush and then just playing tons of music about, like, how your life's amazing. And, like, how you've met the person and you're like, I keep thinking about you. Oh, no. No, no. But then if something sad happens, I cannot. I cannot. I need it because I need the release. Like I need the release too.

I need to talk to my therapist about this. Yeah. Because it helps me to like. I'm like if I don't feel it, it's not there. But for me, I need to feel it or I go crazy. Well, I go crazy. If I feel nothing, I'm like, something's wrong. Like something is very, very wrong.

I'm broken. How often do you cry? A lot. I cry like three times a week. I cry like once every three months. It's weird. I need, no, it's not weird. It's good.

I have friends who cry. And while I'm supposed to be making them feel better, I'm like, you're being so emotional and open right now. Yeah, it's healthy. It's so healthy to like feel something and let yourself react. It's almost like self-love to feel free. It's just because I was like raised in sports where people are like, no crying. No crying in baseball.

No crying in sports. You're weak-ass bitch, but it's not weak. And I think men should, I think it's hot when men cry. I tell the guys in the office every day, like, you need to cry more because they're all stunted, like, emotionally stunted and somewhat physically stunted. But, like, they need, like to cry more and talk about their feelings. But I'm doing, like I said, I'm doing the new thing where I just talk about my feelings. And it's super weird. But it feels good, too.

I want to get to the point where I don't apologize for crying. Like, you're ever, like, with someone and you start tearing up. I'm sorry. I'm feeling. I'm sorry I'm doing something in my body. I want to just be like, yeah, bitch, I'm crying. Like, look at this. Look at what you did to me.

I'm losing hydration. When was the last time you experienced extreme wrath, which I've been waiting to ask you this because you're literally so adorable. You being angry is probably the cutest thing I've ever seen. I don't get mad very often. It takes a lot, a lot to make me mad. The last time I was mad actually was pretty recently, though. Which is funny because I hadn't been mad before that for like a year.

I literally don't get mad. Well, anger is a bad emotion. I'm more of a sad. Yeah, much more of a sad. I'll more blame myself. it I'll get, but mad takes a lot. Yeah, because people who get mad a lot, I think, are people who like to blame people for shit. And they keep stuff kind of internalized.

Yeah, or they'll be a situation will happen. They'll be like, fuck that person where I'll be like, I was stupid. I should have done it differently. I'll be mad for like a second and then it'll pass. When was the last time you were a sloth? Because you are a hard worker. Well, yeah, sort of. I'm very lazy, actually.

I'm like extremely lazy. how you're lazy like my favorite activity is laying in my bed like I would rather be in my bed than anywhere else I was talking I work in bed yeah well I can't I have like an office in my bed like I have a queen size so I have like my snacks I can't because I know if I work in bed I won't be able to sleep but a guy came up once he's like why do you have like a full on cassidia in your bed right now and I was like come I was having lunch obviously um no I'm so lazy I was talking to this guy for a little bit and he was like, oh, I was doing shit. Like he would, I'd be like, what are you doing?

I'm like, watching a movie in bed. And he'd be like, oh, I'm hiking. I'm like, oh, this is not going to work out if you're not the kind of person that wants to like just be in bed with me all day. Also, I hate when people are like, what are you doing? I'm like, you know I'm not doing shit. Why are you putting me on the spot? That's my own issues.

I just don't get it. Like, I'm like, well, why wouldn't you? I want to be with someone who would pick staying in with me over doing anything else any day. Honey, you're preaching to the choir. But it's so hard to find guys like that because guys are so like, my friends want to go to whiskey town so uh we have to think it's guys guys in their 20s like just love alcohol i know but this so do i but like i want to that's why i'm trying to date old guys right now oh my god i totally see you with like a 30 a 34 i see you with a 34 sorry i'm a psychic i she

has her hand over her face right now everyone i'm a psychic i'm revealing this right now 34 is a great age i've been thinking 34 is a great age you've been manifesting 34 really been I dated 33 when I was 26 and I liked it. It was good. I just feel like I need someone who's like not so manic all the time. Yeah, well, they don't know what they're doing and we don't know what we're doing. We're all so confused all the time. Also, like you are successful and I wonder how guys, guys in their 20s I could see either

putting you on this weird pedestal of like, I am dating this girl, she has all these followers and they're not like seeing you for you. We're like an older dude I don't think cares about that bullshit. social status where I feel like young guys love the bragging to their friends about pussy when like it's like guys in their 30s are like oh I just want to find a nice chick yeah I just want to settle down on a couch with the nice girl like this girl kills it on Twitter look at her oh I'm gonna get her pants off I mean like no it's fine that's why I don't fuck like I literally never I it's like it's like girls fuck I don't fuck I don't but girls fuck

like I don't because I'm just I don't want to deal with it no I hate 20 year old guys I really do also I don't want my name in your mouth no Nope, at all. I don't. Unless I want your dick in me, I don't want my name in your mouth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I, like, just slept with this guy, actually, this weekend. And I'm, like, nervous about it.

Because I'm like, what if he, like, tells people? And, like, it's a whole thing. But also, but he's 27. So I feel like he's, like, kind of an adult. Actually, this one of my friends was, like, how do you know so and so? And I was like, oh, we went on a date once. And it was, like, in between two relationships. And it was a one-night stand that I did regret because he may or may not have given me

my first SCD, Climedia. which you just have to take a pill everyone has it but like this one dude the one time i had this like wild hook up he played lacrosse everyone stay away from lacrosse players so she goes how do know this guy and i was like yeah we went on a date and she goes he told me he slept with you i'm like you're on a dating app bragging to someone who knows me saying that you slept with me weird weird behavior like so weird but then part of me was also like if that's what made your day bragging about you slept with me then whatever You just have to kind of own up to it and whatever.

Yeah. Fuck dudes make money. When was the last time you let your pride get in the way of something? Like how is this transition from like girl who was bullied in college to now like girl in the big city making money doing your thing? How has it affected your ego? I mean, I don't really have much of an ego because I get knocked down to earth every single minute of every day. Like I'm not allowed. I don't like get a minute to be like I'm.

good like i never get a chance to just be like i'm killing it every once in a while i'll i will like if i know i've done a really good job on something but i don't like people are so mean to me all day every day i think you're also this is a blessing because if you just like get all this success you're going to be fucked this is part of your story yeah because you've so much more to go like i love bragging that like when i started with betches they were paying me literal pennies as a freelancer yeah rejecting all my shit like all my shit like all my shit shit and during it it sucked but now I'm like oh that's part of my story yeah and now I get I'm such a story girl like my friends make a lot of makes fun of me for do it for the story

that I'm just I'm such a story girl where I'll just be like okay well yes this didn't work out but here's why it works in the tapestry of things I learned this X Y Z like I do like the fact that like getting bullied really badly in college I get to talk about it on my podcast and just be like yeah and fuck this person in particular like I get to do that that makes you feel good you're like I love revenge. But if you... I'm very spiteful. It's healthy.

If you just like get what you want, especially with content, like if you just do... It's like a tweet. The first tweet that you think of is not the best one. No. The first content you're now doing with Bartstool, let's be honest, it's only going to get better. Yeah. Like this is so... This is you training.

Like you literally, this is your first job. This is just your boot camp. Yeah. Like we don't even know what's to come for you. Back to sex. When was the last time you lusted over someone? this is the final question and I want some good answers

she's looking around I'm trying to think about there's no men around us right now I'm trying to think about what I can say that's truthful but doesn't get me in trouble you're like the guy who writes this blog on Barstall I'm just kidding I haven't really seen any hot ones

no I will be so I hadn't had before I hooked up with this guy last weekend I hadn't hooked up with anyone for six months like since I moved here so I forgot were you like scared of New York men totally well I'm not gonna go to fucking fight I to go to your like teeny apart like no like so he got a trial run where we just made out and then he when we hooked up I love a trial run there's nothing hotter than a trial I need to make sure like you're respectful and he was respectful yeah you can tell by a kiss

how respectful well you can tell if they're like immediately trying to put their hand on your pants if they're respectful he didn't even try once there is something so hot about a guy who lets you be at your own pace. Yeah, and doesn't act like he's never seen a tit before. Yeah, who's just like, I know I'm going to see your boobs eventually. I've seen a boob before. Men, if you're listening, like, you don't have to go straight forward. It actually make us want you to touch our tit.

I want to be begging you to touch my tit. Hannah, yes. Every time I'm like, oh, it's okay. Like, I'll take my shirt off, I guess. But it's like, I want to be so, like, turned on that I'm like, I don't even care. Just do it. Also, the sex is better when we're fucking emotionally ready. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because, like, physically won't feel as good. I'm just saying. It doesn't. It never does. But, yeah, no, I, so I forgot how much I like sex. I forgot. I was like, oh, yeah, I like doing this. So now I'm going to go on a rampage.

So I haven't been able to, like, focus at work. I'll be, like, sitting at work. And then I'll just be, like, thinking about it. And, like, it's. Physical touch is really important for your sanity. It's crazy how much I, like, wasn't getting that and realized it. But it's even to the point where, like, someone at work was wearing gray sweatpants yesterday and I swear to God

Hannah I like was at my laptop I'm writing this blog by the way about hot hockey players because horny all the time apparently but I'm like writing this blog I look over and just see the gray sweatpants I looked like directly at his dick and then just kind of went but he was asking for it by wearing gray sweatpants pants that's what I said that's what they do

you survive the game I did I want to wrap this all up with one final question I always ask I love I feel like I'm like it is like boot camp I'm like we're playing this game in hell I want you to give advice to my listeners for how to cope with their hell at the end of the day. When you're in the dark place, how do you cope with your hell? The end of the day, the only person that you are going to be with for your entire life is you.

So if people don't like you or if people are rude to you or whatever is going on in your life is hard for you, just know that you are on your side. And like if you love yourself and you're comfortable and confident in you. yourself, you can take comfort in that every day, just knowing like, I know I'm not perfect, but I'm pretty cute and I'm nice to people. And the only thing that can really get in your way ultimately is you. So just be nice to yourself, take care of yourself, because you are your own best friend. You should be anyways. You are such a wise cherry blossom. Yes, yes I am. I've never called someone that before, but that just came to me. It felt right. I love you so much.

you too everyone follow ellie schnett on instagram twitter is it ellie underscore schnett on instagram and then holy underscore schnett on twitter i need to change that and can you spell schnett s c h n i t yeah sometimes i fuck it out two t is yeah she's just okay um and she has the most amazing podcast schnit talk it's like evolving it's cool it's rad i was on it so you were on it you were a great guess thank you um so you guys have to listen to that and if you've been loving burning in hell leave me a review say something funny DM me whatever hi goodbye um thank you for coming to hell with me bye guys bye