Berner Phone - Emily DiDonato: The Dark Side Of Being A Supermodel & Postpartum

Episode Date: December 8, 2022

Emily DiDonato is the first supermodel in hell! She's been the face of Maybelline, Giorgio Armani Perfume, and has worked for major brands such as Victoria's Secret, Miu Miu, Oscar De La Renta, Guess, and many more. She talks about how she got discovered in a mall in Connecticut and started working while still in high school. She opens up about how she was pressured to spend $10k on designer clothes whenever she shopped in Paris from her agencies, losing weight for campaigns, being rejected, and her opinion on "nepo babies" in the modeling industry. She also explains the wild story of how she met her husband on an airplane! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This podcast is supported by the Real Real. Meet Christine. She loves shopping. And this? This is the sound of fashion overload. Too many fabulous things, not enough space. So Christine started selling with the Real Real. I've always loved collecting designer pieces.

Gucci bags, prodded heels. But my style keeps evolving. Selling with the Real? Game changer. I earn more and they do everything. Seriously. Just drop off your items or schedule a pickup. We handle the photos, descriptions,

pricing, even shipping. You just sit back and watch your items sell, fast, to our 38 million members. And I get peace of mind knowing I earn more selling with The Real Real than anywhere else. Exactly. This? That's the sound of your closet working for you. The Real Real. Earn more, save time, sell fast. And right now, you can get an extra $100 site credit when you sell for the first time. Go to therealreel.com to get your extra $100. Thereelreel.com. That's thereelreel.com. Welcome to Burning Hell Oh my goodness We have a supermodel

We're going to supermodel hell I've been wanting to have around for so long Also like I definitely do have a girl crush on you Oh my really? Like I think you're the most beautiful model who's ever did it What? I'm so flattered. Like, for a while. And, like, I don't mean to creep you out right now, but I literally think, like, I'm pretty confident in myself, but, like, I would trade faces with you. Oh, my God. Yeah. Thank you so much. You're welcome. Oh, nice. We're getting off on the right foot. Let's keep going. I mean, like, aesthetically, I'm obsessed with you. I have your Wikipedia. Well, first of all, give it up for Emily D. Donato. Woo. De Donato. Nice Italian girl. Yes. But also Irish. Yes. And a little Native American. That is correct. Yes. Yes. but mostly Italian, mostly Irish.

You know, I'm Italian, a little Jewish. My husband is Irish. So our baby's going to look like you. Yeah. Perfect. Oh, my God. We're going to have a supermodel. I like, you guys think I'm like joking when I say supermodal, but I'm actually not

joking at all. I have your Wikipedia page up because it was just like. I don't even know what that's going to say. I think I'll update that myself. Is that what people do? They update their own Wikipedia because that might not be accurate. Yeah. I mean, some people's Wikipedia.

Yeah. I'm like, that's not right. But you in 2009 were signed as the face of Mabelene. That's right. I mean, that's not a subtle gig. No. So I had been modeling for like six months and I had gotten that contract. So I was like 17 years old. I was still in high school, like fully still in high school. So I found out about that. And that was really, really shocking and changed my entire life. And then I was with the brand for like 12 years. How did you get that gig? Were you? you with an agency? Yes. So I was with an agency and it's funny. I remember that summer I was going to the Jersey Shore for vacation. As one does. Yes. Between my junior and senior year.

Beat up the beat. Yep. It was great times, Long Beach Island. And I got asked to do a shoot for Glamour magazine. They asked me to come back to the city and I was like, guys, are you seriously going to ask me to like shorten my one vacation of the year at the Jersey Shore? Like, this is like my Super Bowl to do the shoot. So glad that I did though, because I did that. that shoot. It came out in Glamour magazine like in 2009 and someone at Mabelene saw it. And I went into the offices and met with everyone. And I did a test shoot as well, which was extremely painful because I literally did not know how to model. But I mean, they signed me shortly after. And then I was like doing TV commercials with like Christy Turlington and Adriana Lima, but had no idea what I was doing.

God bless them for like dealing with me. Because I literally was like, where do I look? Well, yeah, modeling has so many nuances. And like, as someone who's spent like all day. I was bishing about this on my last Gigli Squad podcast. I spent all day for this red carpet. And I like got a spray tan. I got my hair done. I got a stylist. And then I was like, oh my God, this is all for like one Getty photo. Yeah, exactly. And then I panicked. And it literally was a photo of my mouth moving. I was like, and I was like, this is why people get paid to do this. No, it's so knowing your ink. Well, I'm not going to get. I did watch America's not top model, so I know everything about modeling. But I do have to say you,

Also, Backtrack had kind of that, like, story that everyone dreams of. It says that you were scouted at the Danbury Mall in Connecticut when you were 10 years old by a modeling agency. I was not 10. I was, like, 15, 16 years ago, but I was at the Danbury Mall with my mom, and someone came up to us, and there was, like, this modeling competition happening there, and they were, like, you guys can come, and you'll, like, win this trip to New York City. Meanwhile, I was from upstate New York.

That wasn't really, like, the craziest, like, award, but we were like, okay, I remember I was wearing, like, sneakers and, like, jean shorts, like, very casual, and I went up on a stage. It was so weird, but there actually were legitimate, like, agents there from real agencies from, like, IMG and Elite and Next, and I met with all of them, and then shortly after that went to the city and, like, met with all these agencies in person. And then I signed with a really small agency, and I was doing, like, Ralph Lauren. I remember I booked, like, a Ralph Lauren campaign, like, three days later. Like, it happened so fast for me, so I was super grateful and, like, very lucky because so many girls go for, like, one, three years.

Yeah, I'm five, ten. Yeah. And I was always, like, very athletic. And, yeah, it just kind of happened quickly. And, of course, like, has changed and evolved over the years, but the beginning happened pretty quickly. It's so funny. I'm from Parksville, Brooklyn. It's pretty, like, artsy.

And I remember we were all in elementary school playing in the yard, as kids do. And this town scout for Gap was there. And all the kids were, like, freaking out. And I was, of course, you know, like, okay, this is my moment to shine. And my brother is, like, blonde blue eyes and actually really, really cute. And they pick my brother. And my parents lied to me to make me feel better and say that they picked me too. So they literally brought me to this, like, shoot.

And they go, can you just let her take a photo because you think she's in the campaign? Job! So that's why I'm a comedian. That's so cute that your parents were like, no, you need to make her feel. like she's in it too. I think like I was always like a very driven kid and like and my brother also was too young. Like he was running around but I was like waiting in line like this is it for me. And they're like little does she know that we're literally paying them to not kick her out right now. That's an amazing story though. I haven't thought about that dark moment in a long time.

So I mean kind of the obvious question is do you enjoy modeling? You know, I think it was like painful at moments. There's, like, pros and cons to it like any other job. Yeah. Like, when I was younger and I started, I think it seemed very cool and very glamorous. I traveled a lot, but I did miss out on, like, some core pieces, I feel like of young adulthood, like going to college and just being stupid and silly. Like I mentioned, like you mentioned, I got signed with Mabelian very early on, and I felt

like I was kind of, like, thrown into it quickly, and I didn't feel like I could go party or do things that people do in college. I didn't go to college. So I felt like I missed out on a couple of things. And of course, thrown into an industry where, like, right away, they're, like, kind of analyzing you and what you look like and you're trying to fit into a very specific mold. So that was painful. What I will say now as an adult, and obviously this is, like, 12 years later, what I am grateful for was, like, I was able to become financially independent at a very young age. I didn't grow up with, like, wealthy parents or anything like that.

My dad was a New York City firefighter. My mom was a stay-at-home mom. So, like, by the time I was, like, 19 years old, I, like, bought my own apartment in New York City and was like... Oh, my God. God. I don't say that to be like flex. I say it to be like it was real financial independence for me and something that I really invested like time and energy into. And I'm so grateful looking back that I did that. And it allowed me to learn to work with lots of different people, sometimes very difficult people, people from all parts of the world, people who don't speak English and you do and you're trying to figure it out. And I like working with creative people. And I like being a part of like a bigger project and a bigger vision. Now I can say that as an adult. But when I was younger, there were many painful like moments. but like your 20s are painful no matter what you're doing. Oh my God.

Your 20s are horrible. Horrible. People need to stop saying it's the best time of your life because you're so confused. But it's interesting because with modeling, they kind of chose you. But it sounds like you also like wanted to be a model. Because some people will be like, I didn't really like it. It wasn't really my thing. But I'm just like so beautiful.

Like whatever. But it sounds like you really were like, I'm going to crush this industry. Yeah. I mean, I think because I had made that hard decision like to not go to college, I felt a lot of pressure that I was like, I need to make this work. I felt very determined. I grew up playing sports. I know you did too.

I was kind of like, no, like this, I'm going to make this work and I'm going to be good at it and be successful. And I was like willing to do whatever it took to me to happen. I played basketball, soccer and lacrosse. Oh, my God. Yes, all the way up, I mean, until end of high school senior year. So, yeah, I think I was committed to it in that sense. Like, I wanted to do a good job really badly. And I was like, what am I going to do if this doesn't work out?

like go to college five years later, I don't know, which I kind of ended up doing. But regardless, that's how I felt about it. How is your relationship with your body in the beginning? I mean, in the beginning, I... Because when you're young, I feel like you don't even know. Yeah, like I look back now what I looked like and I was getting critiqued very early on. It was very athletic. Yes, it's a muscle tone. Yes, very muscular. And I look back at that body and I'm like, I looked so good. I can't believe anyone told me that I, there was something wrong with that. Like, I was so sporty and just so muscular. And now I, like, lift weights all the time to try to look like that.

It's not happening. Anyway, but I think, yeah, it was tough because people were like, I never fit the clothes when I would go to set. Meanwhile, I was, like, a size 4, 6. And at the time, that was, like, wild for fashion. At that time in 2008, 2009, all models looked the same. Like, they really did. They were all, like, blonde hair, blue eyes, often Eastern European, very tall, very thin.

Cheekbones. Like, there was, like, nothing else. which is like now you really can look back and be like, wow, it has changed significantly because you see so many different shapes and sizes, colors, and that's amazing. But me coming in like a brunette, a size four, it was like, whoa, this girl is like out of left field. Which is like so disturbing. Yeah, like, so I would get the feedback a lot that I needed to lose weight, try not to be so muscular, which like, how do you even do that? I tried. And it made me hate my body a lot when I was younger. Well, it's crazy because you are a high performing person, like you want to do well. And they're basically saying, like, have a calorie deficit to do well. Right. And as a woman who's like, it's a disastrous situation if you don't take care of your mental health, I feel like. And you're alone from your parents. Yeah. Well, my parents were like an hour and a half away, luckily. So they came to visit all the time. But I was like, basically, I was told to lose weight. And I was like, okay. And I did whatever it took to do that. And I lost so much weight. I probably like almost 30 pounds more than that, like just to get to to be like the right size for the industry. But it was hilarious because once I lost all that weight, a lot of the clients that I had been working with consistently were like, yeah, you looked better before. This doesn't really like work for you. And there I am like so skinny,

like cheekbones. Like, what do you mean? Like I work so hard to get like this. It's like, oh, you actually look better the way your body wants to be naturally. Right. And it didn't look horrible on me and totally unnatural. So I had to take a lot of time to like heal that relationship and figure that out. And it took a long time. And I'm so proud of you for it. And also I feel like when I think of you, I think of just like the close up shot. Like you're so good at like like you have your cheeks and your teeth and your eyes and that like pops. And like it's so not related to like, oh, like how skinny is she? It's just like your energy comes through the screen. Yeah, thank you. Just for the girlies who, to get some tips from a supermodel, I'm like, I fuck up so many photos

because I'm chatting during it, you know, I'm like putting P signs up. Do you have any advice for like looking your best in a photo? I know that's a little question. Yeah, I mean, I do. I have a video on YouTube actually. It's like my most watched video, how to look good in every photo. So you guys can go watch that. But I think in general, always try to like elongate your body as much as you can.

So being hunched over with your limbs close to your body, never good. Always good to show off the way. So if you can kind of show that off in some way, just don't have everything close to your body. Also, put your tongue on the roof of your mouth just to kind of skulk. I really was trying. Your face just crack me up. Sorry. And she's a model.

I'd be a model if people didn't last. at me when I tried to pose. But when you do do that, it kind of sculpts like your jawline flat on the roof of your mouth. Oh, I did it. Mm-hmm. Because when you don't, then it kind of like, you're less defined in that area. And also just making yourself look a little alive in the eye area.

It's never good to like look into the camera like dead hand. Yeah. But if you're shooting for like 20 minutes, I would lose it in the eye. Yeah. Yeah, it's hard. I don't have to go to a different space. Or like when you have to smile, like, yeah. Do you have to do muscle exercises to keep the smile?

No. You're like, I can smile for 12 hours straight. But there are definitely by the end of the day, like you're deceased because you're just like having to put on like an act all day long. And also because you're like quiet, obviously on set, like your brain is like in a totally different place. Yeah. You know, it's like an outer body experience. Wow. Yeah.

It's really fascinating. But I'm so proud of you for like at an early age finding what brings you joy, making that shmoney. But it also, to go from someone who, like, probably, like, didn't even have a credit card to suddenly having, like, some wealth, people don't tell you, like, how to even, like, have wealth. Yeah. And you actually just went viral on TikTok for... What did I? I know. I saw, like, an article pop up, but basically we were talking about Paris.

Yes, yes, yes. Yes. Oh, my gosh. Yes. I was talking about that with one of my best friends just the other day, who's also a model, like, how much money they would make. you spend on clothes, which I framed it obviously in a way to make it go viral. Yeah, the title was you were forced to spend $10,000 a day on all black clothes. Yeah, 100%. In Paris, because they wanted you to look more chic. Yes, correct. And I was very into this article. Yes. So that is exactly what happened. Like basically, and my girlfriend, who's a model also confirmed, she was like, that is what would happen. My mom would be there too. And I would go to my agencies overseas and they would be like, you know, I would be wearing whatever, like, Forever 21 and not cute clothes, but I didn't know how to dress. I was like a teenager. I didn't know how to dress like a model, put it that

way. Yeah. But yeah, they would be like, you know, this doesn't work. And on one hand, I give them credit. They were like, you're about to go meet Carl Lagerfeld. Like you can't wear Forever 21. And I was kind of like, oh, okay, like, no worries. But then we would go to like all the fashion spots in Paris. And they would be like, here's like your Valenciaga shoes and like your Lonvon pants and like this blouse and this. And they'd be like perfect. Like go check out. like this is your new like all black model wardrobe and it would be like 10 grand and me and my mom would be there like oh my god i get money anxiety i would throw up I would throw up in right there but also if you think about it from business perspective if you're going to make a hundred grand on a dior campaign right because you invested 10k into your outfit right but if you don't get these campaigns you that is pressure yes totally you're eating croissants like one croissant a day you can't afford to eat at a restaurant in Paris.

Yeah. And it was funny because in that video, everyone was like, well, everyone was like, show us what you still have. And I, like, did not have anything because I, like, had gotten rid of all of those clothes, probably because they were all trigger warnings. But, like, I was literally like, I can't look at these, like, size 24 pans. I remember Tyra Banks in America's, like, top model would talk about their, like, personal style when they were getting judged.

Like, what is this? And I was kind of like, okay, give these girls a fucking break. They're not taking a photo right now. Yes. But I guess it's like your brand that you exude. Also, I hope nowadays because of social media that women are getting stuff sent to them. Probably. But like back then, we didn't have.

That wasn't a thing. Like what, Facebook? You weren't like going viral on Facebook? No, definitely not. You would never get anything for free like 10 years ago in a million years. So you had to like invest in your wardrobe and model street style was very much a thing. Was your mom into fashion? No, no, no, no.

My mom is like the biggest tomboy ever. She has, like, short hair and wears Lulu Lemon 24-7. Like, she is obsessed with her. Yeah. Because I didn't know anything about fashion. So when people were telling me, like, the cost of things. And I'm like, but it looks just like that. Right.

But that's jeans. Yeah, jeans I would never spend, like, a lot of money. Or, like, I still don't understand the Birken. Like, I still can't understand. No, no, no, no. And TikTok has made the Birken like something, a different beast, I feel. Yeah, I can't do it. You have so many amazing stories.

The way you met your husband is the most incredible story. ever heard again like your life is a literal rom-com that part of my life is okay you get discovered in a mall then tell me how you met your husband because this is straight up a rom-com yes so i met my husband kyle flying from new york to denver colorado i was going to shoot the cover of vogue australia and veil and then he was going for like a work ski boondoggle thing and we sat next to each other and we started talking. I slept the first half of the flight. Honestly, I was like, hard to get. Yeah. Yeah. Like Kyle was like, yeah, she couldn't get enough of me. Like love at first side. I'm like, I'm like, I'm pretty sure I slept like the first three hours. You're like, can me your elbow, sir? Your elbows

on my chair. Um, but then we started talking and we had a lot in common. We were both from upstate New York. We had friends in common. Was this like during the flight you were talking? Okay, that's intense. Yes. And it was funny because at all of his coworkers and people he knew were sitting around us. So everyone was, like, witnessing this happen. So everyone was kind of like, what's going on up there? This makes me laugh because there's that joke that you have sexual tension with literally anyone relatively close to your age in airport. It's like an airport crush where, like, he could be so ugly, but he's like 32 and I'll be

like, we're going to fuck. Yeah. But you met your husband. Yeah. And, you know, at the time when we were talking, he was so nice and he was so polite. And I did not get the vibe that he was hitting on me, which probably worked in his favor. to anyone out there. Like, he was just being very nice, just curious.

Yeah, you don't feel creeped on in, like, a closed environment. No, that would have been awful. But he was very persistent and called and called and called. And I remember I was traveling for work, like, booked, busy. And I was like, why is this guy that I met on the airplane keep calling me? Like, what does he want? And he was like, I'm trying to, like, get you to hang out. And I was like, oh, well, I'll be back from Paris in, like, three weeks.

I'll let you know. I came back, and then we got together. And then we kind of started dating after that. I'm going to cry. Yeah. Wait, how was your dating situation before you met, Kyle? I mean, I feel like I had dated some male models and, yeah, that was, don't recommend that phase for anyone. I guess it fulfilled like a certain. Yeah, you want to be like, oh, I could get this guy who has like perfect ratio of bone structure and then you realize that they're human too. Yeah, unfortunately. Unfortunately. Yeah. I'm like, good looking people can be assholes. Damn it. Yeah, but unfortunately when you're a model, like you kind of only meet other models or other people like in entertainment. whether it's at events or shoots or photographers, photographers, assistants. So that's kind of like the pool you're working from, which is not the best pool, in my opinion. I wouldn't revisit it if I was single today. That's for sure. So for girls who their dream is to be with a male model, what would you say? I would say that is, you know, it's interesting because with male models, sure, they're attractive, but actually in the modeling industry, it is the only industry I feel, except maybe porn, where women make more than men. So male models tend to be broke.

You're like they're literally just like a prop on the set with me. No, unfortunately they are. And it makes them so upset. I'm so sorry if you're a male model watching this. But they make like a quarter of what would female models make. So you don't want that. Not that it's about money, but like he may be hot, but you're going to be smart with his finances. Yeah.

I feel like that's not really, not my thing. I feel like I supported my maybe ex-boyfriends more than I would have liked who are male models. You're such a sugar mama. I love it. You're like, yeah, I'm paying some child support to the mom. models. They have no children, but I'm paying. They are my children, my ex-model boyfriends. So Kyle is like finance bro. Yes. Finance bro. I know. I feel like on TikTok, when people rip on like dating finance guys or how horrible they are, I'm sure you've even talked about it. Oh, for sure. And it's like,

it's hilarious because certain things you're like, it's totally true. And every now they get in like a conversation about crypto that you're like, I'll mall my eyes out. No. Yeah. We like, I listen to all of his work conversations and like know what's going on. But aside from that, I'm like, it's fine. But yeah, he works in private equity and he was an investment banker before that. So such different industry. Like, it's wild. But he still helps me with like certain work aspects and business things. But for the most part, like so different in that sense. How did you realize he was the one? You know, I felt like I was never confused with Kyle. Like he was just so straightforward and so persistent. And so just like,

like, I love you. I care about you. No games. No, zero. No, no, no, no, no, no games. And still to this day, no games. I'm never confused with him. I always know his intentions, which are always good and always caring. And he was just a good person through and through. And we had so much fun together. And I felt like I learned so much with him and from being around him. And I could see us building a life together. But I think the main thing was like respected him emotionally. Yes. I very much respected him emotionally. And I loved the way he like prioritized us and our relationship and like the growth of it, it was just clear. Like I never was like tortured by it or like it was just easy. As someone who also travels for work, how did you guys handle like, yeah,

like you having to go to Japan for four weeks or that kind of stuff? In the beginning, that was really, really hard. Like I would be gone for weeks at a time. And I think for him he was very confused by that because he was like, so when are you coming back? And sometimes I would be going from like Paris to Russia to Milan to London. He would be like, when are you coming back? And with modeling, you find out sometimes about your jobs, like, three or four days before. Or you're like being on hold? Right. You're on hold or you're like, oh, can you please just go to Paris after you go here so you can do this job? And you're like, I guess so I'm already in Europe. It sounds so glamorous. I know a lot of it's not, but you're like, oh, I'm just going to Paris. Like, I'm not. But again. No, I know it sounds like that. I totally

get why it probably sounds like that. Probably sounds obnoxious. Where do you travel now, though, to like, because as a tennis player, I used to play a lot in Florida. And there was a long time where everyone's like, I's got to Florida. And I was like, I can't even look at a palm tree. I'm triggered. So where do you go? So that's how I felt about Paris, actually. The one time we had a wedding in Paris, I cried hysterically before we went because I so badly didn't want to go because I was so triggered by that place. And he was like, Paris is amazing. Actually, when I could go and like eat and enjoy and like have fun, I was like, what a great city. But the way I had experienced it prior was not great. Where do I go now? Gosh, I don't know. Since I had a

baby. I don't go anywhere. I love that for you. What a great segue, though, because I'm in a situation where I just got married. And something happens. Like, I never, I was wanted kids. I never, like, had a distinct plan. But we got married. And that night, we went to bed. And I was like, I want you to have my babies. I want to do it. Like, there's something that comes over you. But then I'm, like, you're traveling around, doing stand-up and stuff. And it's not, and everyone's like, you can't have it all. You can't have it all. How have you navigated your career, popping out the kids, you're pregnant currently. Yes, yes. Um, how have I navigated it? Am I navigating it? Is that what it looks like? It's the word that I came up with. I'm like, um, I feel like,

because you could be a pregnancy model. Yeah. Oh my gosh, never. I'm not going to be on my feet for 12 hours. Like, and also I'm not one of those pregnant people and I'm not saying this to fish for compliments. Like who's like a cute pregnant person? Like I get pregnant all over when I was like, I was, no, I'm not a pregnant model. I'm a regular model, not a maternity model. Anyway, in managing my career, first all, with having kids, I will say, I don't think you're ever ready. Like, even if you think you're ready, you're not ready. Like, I feel like that's cliche advice, but it's true because what hits you on the other end, you're like, didn't foresee any of this. No one told me any of this, like, or how I was going to feel in this role or how I was going to take it. That's a combination,

I'm sure, of, like, hormones and all of that. But in terms of my career, I mean, obviously it halts kind of the modeling side of things. But then I also have a combination. I also have a kind of like my influencer career call it or content creator career. And then I also have a skincare brand called Covey. So that keeps me super busy, thank God, because I think if it all just fell flat after having children, like that would be really hard. Definitely as an entrepreneur, it's smart to not have all your eggs in one basket. I love multiple sources of revenue. I know what's going to happen. But Covey, you sent to me early on. And as someone who I get very overwhelmed with like too many products. Yeah. And I was always like, what

goes first. And then I would buy all these different things. And I'd get scared that if you combine certain things, it's not meant. So you came out with this like really easy, peasy, like, three steps that I, I, like, loved. I'm still using the moisturizer. I think I ran out of one thing. Is there anything about Covey that you want to tell me? No, I mean, I think you hit the nail on the head or whatever. The term is, but I think I've been a model for so long, came from the school of thought that more was more when it came to skincare and beauty. My skin would suffer and be flaking and like falling off my face burning and itching because I would put everything on my face

that was ever recommended to me. My dermatologist was like less is actually more with skin care. You know, if you're using the right products in the right order that are meant to be used together, so myself and my business partner started it and we wanted to create a clean, simple, effective routine that was designed to be used together to take the guesswork and the complication out of it.

It's really gentle but effective and totally clean. So that was our thinking behind it. And I'm just so proud of it because especially even now as a mom, like I don't have time to be, when I think about like my previous self-care routines and what I would do, your time just whittles away. So now I'm like, gosh, Covey is like so relevant to me because it's like so easy and so quick. And then like, of course, my skin is still important for me in my life.

And I love it so much because I'm like, if Emily does it, I can do it. I'm like, this is supermodel approved. Yes. It's also, do you feel like your life has really, really, really changed having kids? Yeah, I do. I feel like your brain gets so altered. Like, I just feel like no one talks about how different you feel and you kind of can't go back to who you were. That's how I feel. Maybe that's my depression talking. Go shit, let me go my therapist. But I feel like it could be dark or really light. Yeah. Like, I just feel like you change so much as a person. And I also think what was hard for me also was like my whole life and spirit and energy was altered so much. And then you look at your partner and for men it's just so different like their lives don't change as much as you do and that's a lot of hormones too right and they can't even relate to like so many parts of it they don't even know how certain things feel yes like I remember when I was postpartum and I was like in a diaper and like not sleeping at all because you're like still bleeding and like so much going on and your breastfeeding or feeding and like there's just like liquids leaking everywhere and I just see my husband who's just like about to go do like a peloton class and I'm like this is so messed up like

what how did what the but yeah i do feel like it it alters you significantly but also in amazing ways like you become so much stronger than you ever imagined like for me actually pregnancy and childbirth and being a mom makes me look at men like they're so one dimensional in a way because as a woman i look at myself and my friends and how much we do and think about and the emotional intelligence it requires but also juggling their careers and a million things i'm like women like even though it's like kind of painful do it all and it's wild yeah for sure not given enough credit like ever in a million years did you have some postpartum depression i did i actually more so had postpartum anxiety which is different so a lot of people warn you about the baby blues postpartum depression and i was so

like ready for that and terrified like had therapist on speed dial um but i got like someone called postpartum anxiety like postpartum depression's evil bitchy sister which it is um so i had basically like I could never sleep even when the baby was sleeping and I would stay up all night and I was obsessed with time and counting like almost like this obsessive compulsive coming out like a sense of one in control trying to but you can't with a newborn and then also extremely intrusive thoughts like you just picture yourself falling down the stairs like holding your newborn or that you're accidentally going to like fall on top of a knife somehow like truly final destination thoughts yeah but what's so crazy is I remember talking to other moms and they're like oh my god Honey, is toy normal? I had that too. And I'm like, uh, no one. No one talks about it. Told me that. I was going to have the most like murderous final destination thoughts of my life. It's super disturbing too. Because the way motherhood is displayed is so like, yeah, like they're overalls and they're holding the baby while like painting the baby room. No. So, and I think I couldn't, I could not leave the house. That was super hard for me.

I don't think I left the house with my daughter Teddy until she was like six weeks old because I would think about letting go of the stroller. someone coming over. And in the moment, like, I just remember who's drenched in sweat at all times, like just thinking about the most horrible case scenarios at all times. It was not great. But now you're like, let's do it again. Well, yeah. I mean, Mother Nature does you so dirty because you forget. You're asking me right now. You're like, did you have a postpart impression? I'm like, hold on. Let me think about that. It was a year ago. So, yeah, I had that other thing. And you do forget, which is also probably why when you ask other moms about things, they're like, oh yeah i remember that we blocked it out yes like yes it's also you've had such a successful career

in your 20s you're now 31 yes and it has me thinking like i talked to my therapist about it she's like what do you define a success when is enough yeah and it's kind of like you've conquered the modeling world in so many ways now that you're taking on becoming a mother how do you assess your career differently or like are there still a lot of goals you want to do in the modeling world you know I feel like it's it hurts in a way because it's like it's just ever evolving and changing and there are some days where I'm like I want to start a podcast and I want to do this and I want to do this and then there are other days where I'm like I actually don't want to do any of that I just want to like be at home with my daughter and wipe myself from the internet if that was even possible I think it's like I'm

still figuring out what my identity is like after having a baby and I I think it frustrates me not knowing because I was a very goal-orientated person. If there was something hanging in front me, I'd be like, I'm going to go get that. But sometimes you're like, I want to make all this money. And then you're like, for what? So that you can afford to maybe like live in the suburbs and like have kids and not work. But then you're like, but all I know is work. So yeah, I think I'm going to have trouble with that too. Yeah. Like, because there's no end game. We like the journey of like the work. Totally. And it's really hard. You do have to reassess and reevaluate like what fulfills you and why is that fulfilling you? It's like, why do you want that? Are you trying to prove something to

someone? Totally. Yeah. So that's complicated. I don't have a great answer for that. I guess the answer is no, I haven't figured it out. I'm figuring it out. I love that. I also want to, I watched the Victoria's Secret documentary. Oh, wow. Yeah. Were you an angel? No, no, I was never an angel. I went to all, like, a lot of the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show castings. I was actually going to do TikTok about this because I still have the emails of like the casting requirements and what they would ask you do and wear. But no, I was never an angel. I just did the catalog here and there, but that never quite like, like, loves the catalog growing up. I love the catalog. Same. Oh my gosh. The clothes were great. The clothes were gray. And like I wore V.S. Pink. I was all over. Yes. I loved it. And I

totally wanted to do it. I mean, it totally messed with my head as like a younger adult. But I did Sports Illustrated swimsuit, which was like different and like a little more like accepting of like different sizes. Why do you think you weren't chosen? Because I was too fat for sure at the time. that's what like it was I was too curvy for sure I always got the feedback that I was too curvy or too athletic and oh I hate that they say too athletic yes that was a big thing then but like also Victoria's Secret models when you look back had such a specific figure because actually in like the 2000 2010s they were athletic but had like six pack abs but like super skinny legs and I never had quite that proportion remember six back abs were trending that was the most toxic should I've ever seen. Yeah. And then with like the BBLs, like girls would have a six pack with a fat ass. And I'm like, girl, you can't have a fat ass without a little protection on the ovary.

So true. Right? Yeah. No. But it was like, I mean, they went through their own phases of like what the ideal body was and told us what it was. But yeah, it just never worked out for me. I don't know. Maybe it wasn't because I was too fat.

Maybe they just hated me. But either way I didn't get your personality. They're like, actually it wasn't your body. Like you're going to help. Also, have you had pressure to. to get plastic surgery? No, I have never gotten... Have I?

Wait, hold on. You're like, my entire face is something else. Let me think about that. No, no, no, no. I never have. Because you've probably done like intense dermatology type stuff or skin. No, actually, not a lot of that either, because I feel like I was young and all that. No.

No, no one's ever asked me to do plastic surgery. How about like Botox and stuff? No, not that either. because for me, I was the face of Mabelian. If my face was, like, frozen or looking crazy when you came in, like, you couldn't even dye your hair without asking. Like, you can't walk in with your face looking different. So no.

Yeah. It's wild. Yes. One other question. This is more for me. I am always bloated in some capacity. Yeah. And I remember on my wedding day, the only thing I was like, please just don't be bloated.

And I, like, purposely was, like, trying not to eat to, like, I was, like, snacking. And right before I was supposed to. to go down the aisle, I was like, I'm starving. And there was just like a turkey wrap right there and I just shoved it in my face of my mom. I did that too before my wedding. I ate a cheeseburger like right before I walked down the aisle. Because you're crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I know like I've done some like sports type shoots like 10 shoots. And I just remember thinking like you just have to make sure because your body looks so different at different times of the day. Yeah. Based on like smelling a cheeseburger I could bloat. Yes. What was your way of kind of making sure your body was like.

leveled and balanced. Yeah. I mean, a small tactical tip, like for feeling less bloated. A trainer gave me this advice and it does work eating asparagus before a shoot because it's a natural diuretic, but it doesn't make you feel awful and it's obviously like a natural way. But in general, to feel balanced for me, I always feel the best when I'm lifting really heavy weights and I'm eating mostly protein vegetables and like, like on carbs. People don't want to hear it, but that's what it is. What's the craziest thing you ever did to like get ready for a shoot? Oh my gosh. I remember one time I went to this like dungeon spa in New York. I swear if it's still like this. There's actually so many of them. I know. And that's actually like not even crazy. Yeah. Dungeon spa and did like some sort of weird diuretic seaweed scrub wrap and I was being whipped with like leaves and stuff. Like maybe it wasn't even a spa. It was probably like a sex dungeon. I don't know what was happening. But, um, In the goal to, like, I don't know, lose a few pounds.

You're like, scared the weight out of me. Yeah. I just remember for that specific one, I had a really, really big shoot. Call it in, like, five days. And they were like, you are looking so great, but you just need to lose three or four more pounds before the big day, which was like five days away. And you're like, for sure. Like a wrestler. Yeah, like a wrestler.

Very similar. So I was just like, oh, my gosh, like, what am I going to do? So I did a million things to try to live it. How do you deal with, like, that level of hunger? I was just so cranky cranky I would like faint I get like jittery it was so cranky and I was so miserable and like even when you do get to like that quote unquote goal weight you're so miserable yeah like life there's no joy and so you're saying that like nothing tastes as good as skinny feels that's not true I disagree with that so fucking much because also anytime I'm super thin too I'm usually like mildly depressed I also might in some reason or another I'm really skinny my head looks like is kind of big. That's what I told me. Everyone does.

Like, bobblehead effect. Yeah. I have a weird phobia of being hungry. Like, before I go on stage, I'm like, someone get me some hummus. Like, where most people I, I just would rather not be hungry. Yes. Then feel like a little bit bloated on stage.

Yeah. Because then you can't think clearly you're not yourself. I'm the same exact way. I would be on set and be like, I don't want to get bloated or this or that. But then you're expected to like be on your feet all day long and like performing and you're like, you can't do both or I couldn't. Yeah. Yeah.

Have you ever had? any editing phopas or like seeing yourself in the campaign and being like, who's in? Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's been like so many times where I'm so excited for a shoot to come out. I remember one time in specific and I was like, wait, is that me? I'll never forget it. They like photoshopped my face, my eyes to someone else's like nose and mouth and lips. And I was so sad because I was like, that is me, but it's like not me. And yes, I've watched myself be photoshopped in front of my eyes multiple times. And that when I was younger was so painful. And I would just like watch them like elongating my legs and like cinching the waist.

I mean like face tuning you in front of your eyes and you're just like, oh, wow, that's so painful. And you're like, they're basically like, thanks for the raw footage. Like we can work off of this. Also, I remember always being like, why did I even bother trying to like lose way for this shoot? If you're going to do that, let me be. Yeah. Yeah. Have you ever had like a cover or something big and like not like the photo?

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. many of times. Like especially like sports illustrated and specific just because like I remember many times the issue would come out. No hate on them. It's just like a different genre of modeling. So sometimes when the pictures would come out, I would just be so unhappy. It's not editorial. Yeah. Like I would just be like, oh, I wish I wasn't wearing that G string bikini. I usually wear one piece is. Well, shit. So. Yeah. You didn't feel like it aligned with you sometimes. Yeah. Like you're just like, yeah. I also in the shoots that I've done, they'll always like I recently did an express shoot. which I love like I did a holiday campaign with I was like channel your Emily's yeah but I always wear my hair down the middle because I have a lot of weird like calic yeah so they look at me and they're like we're putting your hair to the side and they're like are you okay with that and I'm like I mean I don't love it but I also like would let anyone do anything to me and I'm like thank you I looked like Donald Trump

I'm like the whole shoe my hair at the side and you also don't feel confident with your hair Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I mean, it ended up, I ended up kind of pulling it off. But I just remember looking at Payne and be like, is my hair insane right now? Yeah, no. You can totally say, like, I don't like that. They'll do crazy things that I've never had done before. Because I also like, I don't look at myself in different ways so much. Like, you're probably so used to all this kind of makeup. Where I'm like, I know the makeup. I like and know the hair I like. And I go on set and they'll do like the crazy, put my hair in some insane bun. Yeah. You should have told them. Actually, a lot of models do have preferences about like the way their hair is parted, the way their hair is parted, the way they're makeup is done. Some of them prefer to do certain aspects of it themselves. I guess I was assume that they know better than me, but then it's kind of like, do they? No, because you know what you want to look like. Yeah, and how you carry yourself. Yeah. I'm, I mean, I could ask you like a Brazilian questions, but it's, we don't have time. One final question, though. So you're in the suburbs now. Yes, I am. Why? Why? Yeah. Yeah. I can't answer that yet. No, I, I,

I grew up in upstate New York. I always pictured, like, raising my children, like, with a yard and that type of thing. Your apartment in New York City was gorgeous. Yes, and I loved New York, and I loved being here. But, like, it was, you know, no matter how big your apartment is with children, it's hard here. But anyway, I always picture the suburbs. I'm there. It's super strange and it's very isolating.

And I definitely miss, like, a lot of elements of being here. But I am trying it on for size. And I think I will eventually, like, get used to it. but it is a totally, like, out-of-body experience so far. Wow. It's just so quiet. Like, when I'm there and it's just me and my daughter, I'm like, hello? Is anyone there?

I'm like, no, it's just me. The call's coming from inside the house. It's funny because Des and I have, like, a shack in West Hampton. And when we're there, I'm like, do we raise our kids in West Hampton? Yeah, I know. Like, it's very tempting. Well, that's, like, your motherhood brain, like, going on like that. It's like protecting. I could see them doing all these outdoor activities.

But then I'm also like, if our kids are in New York, like if they grew up on the Lower East Side, they're going to be doing like acid when they're 11. Totally. They're going to be cooler than me at three years old. But, you know, I do like the schools. I know. There are so many pros and cons. And I definitely miss being able to just like step outside so easily and like grab coffee, see a friend. Like do so much.

Because you have to factor like other people in your decision though. Like it's not just you anymore. Yeah. Which is like rude. I know. You really, I know. That's like being a mom. You're like, oh, my gosh, I have to think of, like, you and what's best for you and, like, the life you're going to have.

So still TBD on how I feel about it. It's only been, like, a month. Yeah. So I feel so strange every day. You are fresh. It's so fresh. Like, even coming back here for this, when I texted you, I'm on my way. I know, she said on her way at, like, 11, and I was like, girl, like, are you on a city bike?

What's going on? Yeah. So, you know what? I'm adjusting. If anyone has any words of advice of how to adjust better or faster, please let me know. I love it. Yeah. It's exciting.

I really think there's no right or wrong, like, decision. It's just, like, checking in all the time. Yeah. And, yeah, you're making a change. Yeah. But I'm kind of glad you're doing it all at once, like, really quick. Yeah. Pop them out.

Move to the suburbs. I'm condensing it, for sure. But being pregnant, suburbs, like, all of that. I have a one-year-old. I'm kind of like, who am I? You have a dog, too, right? I do, yes. We love.

Yeah. Okay, it's time to play the seven deadly sins. Seven Deadly Sins. What are you greedy about? Greedy about. What are you greedy about? You go first so I can think. Oh, look at her putting it back on me.

I always get nervous. What am I greedy about? I'm greedy about making people laugh. Like, it's like kind of an addiction. It never gets old. I want to get as many laughs all the time. Food. It's so weird.

I'm not even saying this to like make myself. I'm such a good sharer. Like, I am. Like, with everything, my husband's a horrible share. Like, I, I don't know if I'm Greek. Did you have siblings? I have a brother and a sister of I'm the youngest. But I think also because I'm like a Pisces.

I don't know. Like, I don't get like that, like, possessiveness about, like, anything. How about, like, money? No. Definitely not. Very, like, fluid about that, too. Like, I guess I'm greedy about, like, time with my daughter. Like, I don't know anyone else to hang out with her or something or just me or I don't know.

Maybe that. Like, or I get annoyed when other people. People are like having to come out with her, like stuff like that. I got to think on it. That's not a good answer. No, no, no. That's actually a really good answer, time with your daughter. Yeah.

I like that a lot. Who are you envious of? I feel like it's more of a motherhood thing, but I am definitely envious of like mommy bloggers. Like I turn into a literal troll on the internet when I see like moms who are like so picture perfect. And like everything just seems so put together and like easy and they don't share. any of, like, the struggles or realness of motherhood. And I'm just, like, I just, like, want to comment mean things, like, a literal troll. But I am definitely, like, because I'm envious, though, because I'm like, wait, was it actually

like that for you? So you didn't think about, like, falling on a set of knives with your newborn like I was. So I envy that. You're like, I want to leave disturbing hate comments. I do. Like, when you think, like, why do people leave mean comments is because they're hurting or they're triggered. Like, that's me.

But it also, like, could be constructive to be like, I mean, not to say anything, but for them to be a little, that's, but that's their job. They're trying to be aspirational. Exactly. And it's so fucking annoying. And I don't, I'm not, I'm not inspired. I get, like, super triggered. Yeah.

But because I envy them and what it appears to be for them. I also ranted about this on a different episode, but like the mommy bloggers who like their whole career is based off of their kids. Yeah, that's weird. It's, especially someone who was a model at a young age, like, I don't think the kids are consenting. I also think it's not fun. Like, I don't want my childhood to be remembering, like, hold this and say this to the camera when you don't want to. Like, I could see my kid doing funny things and me wanting to post it possibly, but not having my, like, career based on, like,

if, you know, little Johnny wakes up and, like, does this ad. Yeah, like, getting them to perform, that's, like, their children. Like, how do you do that? No, that's definitely not part of my brand for sure. I mean, I think my daughter is beautiful and the cutest thing ever. Duh, I'm her mom. But, like, I'm biased first of all and I just think it doesn't benefit them in the end I also even think your brand overall as a model you always like really let people in yeah where I think models could be so aspirational it's kind of like you don't understand my life and like I won't make eye contact with you and like you yeah just get away that's like the energy I got from some videos where with yours you were like this is the day in the life of like me being a model New York City and it all it

wasn't like it was so honest and like your friend talking to a friend at brunch. So I feel like even if you start making some mom content of like what you make for lunch for your kids or like how you navigate certain parts of it, it'll still be fun and relatable. Yes, definitely. But it's never picture perfect because it just isn't. I can't lie about that. No. I mean, even people who vlog, I'm like, where is the nap? Yeah. Or like your messy closet. Like I'm always like, this place It's a mess. I think it's messy and like looks insane. Do you find it's harder now that you have more space to manage it? Yes. There's just mess as ever. I'm so disorganized. It's horrible. That's how I am. I say I'm a creative. Yeah, same. When was last time you experienced extreme wrath or anger? Oh, my gosh, all the time. Really? Well, that's actually a weird postpartum thing too. Sorry for your listeners if no one's pregnant or had children. I, especially this pregnancy, I'm pregnant with a boy. So my first pregnancy I was pregnant with a girl. I felt very like weepy and sad. This pregnancy, I'm straight race. And I wonder if it's like the testosterone. Like I get so mad about things I can't even sleep.

Like what like and there's so many things like I can't even like I was so irritated before I came here because I didn't have the right socks for these shoes and my foot would flip in and I literally threw it across the room in my closet like a psycho. So I feel a lot of rage. People probably would not expect that though. And I guess it's like how you deal with anxiety where you have to be like this isn't me. This is like so. any chemicals going on in my body and brain right now. Yeah. I kind of love angry. I know. I know. It's my husband's like, what is with you? And I'm like, I don't know what I'm like so mad. I can't wait to be pregnant and just do insane things really. Sorry I'm pregnant.

Yeah. You don't want to be that stereotype. Just rob a bank and you're like, I'm pregnant. I was like raging last night and eating a bowl of ice cream for dinner. And I'm like, this is the most pregnant thing I've like ever done. I'm like here. Have you had weird cravings? No, but I still. to like eat whatever and like live my life well yeah do you feel pressure to keep your weight a certain way oh yeah i felt like with my first pregnancy i really fought it like i worked out every day and like tried to eat so healthy i still gained like 35 pounds like which is normal but like yeah but like this pregnancy i just felt like i was kind of fighting it and like without success because i still like my body did what it needed to do so i feel like with this pregnancy i'm like it's gonna do what it

needs to do. And then postpartum, I'll figure it out like I did last time. Like, I'm not fighting at this time. It's too exhausting. I love that. Yeah. I love hearing moms talk about their second kid versus their first guest. The second kid, you're like, he's in the car somewhere. I don't know where he is, but he's there. When was the last time you were a sloth, so, like, super lazy. Oh, my gosh. All these questions. I'm pregnant. Like, all the time. Like, literally, my husband and she's a mom, too. I know. Well, the thing is, when you have young children, my daughter goes to bed at, like, 6.30 at night. Oh, cool. So then I, like, crawl in. to bed immediately and put on like my heated blanket and watch TikTok for like eight hours.

Amazing. So like every night. So like every night. So every night. I love that so much. When was the last time you let your ego get in the way of something? It gets in the way, in the sense that like I, with my career, I guess, because I can't think of a specific time, but I definitely at times like look at what other models are doing or like achieving. and then I compare myself and I and then I it gets in the way because I kind of shut down I like don't get inspired I just go like everyone's so much better than me and like I used to be like something now I'm not and then I just shut down yeah did you get bullied when you were younger no not really yeah well you're kind of tall

you just that wasn't like you could take yeah I totally good I used to beat the shit out of my because like you like found success at a very early age yeah which I do say that does fuck you up with what you just said being like, okay, I had this. Right. And then like life goes on. Yeah. Sometimes people when they're young and get huge success, it could really fuck them up because they feel like less than. But it's really just like you're on your own journey and like popping at different times. Yeah. And also some would argue like what is your definition of success? You're going to have a beautiful boy and a girl. Right. And a beautiful home. Yeah. I guess it kind of gets in the way with it doesn't get in the way of motherhood, but it's like the ego of like wanting to be successful, which sometimes for us means views, likes, like visibility, being relevant.

True. Sometimes the numbers, you're like, you feel like they don't lie and they're telling you something. Right. So then that sometimes I'm like, I need more of that. Like, I need to focus on that. But then I'm like, well, I actually like, don't. That's not the most important thing. And also some people will do social media so they could one day get a Mabelene campaign.

Right. So you're kind of like working in reverse, which is really funny. Yeah, because I like, yeah, it's weird. Did that answer the question? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.

That was good. Okay. Obviously, we're obsessed with Kyle. But when was the last time you lusted over someone like celebrity? Do you have like a celebrity crush? Oh my gosh. Celebrity crush. I'm so bad with that because like I think I'm bad with that because I have met enough celebrities in my career that like they're always so disappointed.

I'm sure you feel the same way. A thousand percent. You're always like, so then the crushes stop because you're like I know you're going to be so much more insecure and shorter than I ever imagine. that or like you realize that there's a reason why they try to be so famous and it's because they're like intolerable to be around and they take up all the air in the room lost it over celebrity my god like i can't even think of you like i actually hate them yeah i actually kind of do yeah i do i love that like whenever i'm in the same room as any of them i'm like why are you the worst like i've literally had oh my gosh yeah they've and they're so rude to be around too sometimes yeah

I know I know exactly you're like you don't need to do this and then but then I do feel like some celebrities they'll do like the tiniest thing like say thank you to a waiter and everyone's like I know they are so down to earth and I'm like they said thank you for the appetizer yeah no they're never down to earth oh my god I'm a celebrity hater you heard it here first but it's so funny because I feel like you're like so recognizable I guess like as in like they should suck up to you if they're clout chasing yeah I never felt that, I just always felt like any time I was like, yeah, I do feel like, I guess I don't like that energy of, like, people fawning over, I also don't like it in return either. I don't like when people, I feel like people are fawning over you for a certain reason. I hate it as a model because it's always like fake and phony anyway. But I also, it's uncomfortable, like, human to human. It's not the sense of us to be an interaction. Just be normal. You're like, you're making this up on your head. I'm literally existing in front of you. So I think celebrities expect that energy and I'm always like, but you're the worst. Why would I do that?

that that's literally so iconic because it's coming from experience you're like I researched it and here's my hypothesis I'd rather not yeah also what are the murmurs in the modeling community you know now that we have they call them like a nepo babies oh my gosh can we have your kind of two cents on it all I mean I feel like I agree I feel like the opinion has shifted slightly like I feel like over the last couple of weeks I've seen a lot of conversations about it like when people are like nepo babies work as hard as other models, like, that's not true. Because Nepo Baby's, like, the minute they walk on to set, they are already are a celebrity. When you walk on as a nobody, you are not respected. People sometimes treat models absolutely horribly. You're like a human clothing hanger. Yeah. Like, I just remember being on a set once with a Nepo Baby, and she took a nap. I've never taken a nap on set in my life, like for any reason. And I've been like on set with the flu, not on purpose. But anyway, like, they're treated completely. differently. They are treated like celebrities because they kind of are already celebrities. Like,

they already are. So, like, they do get a level of respect that I think other people on set, whether you're a model or not, don't. So they definitely have a leg up and they definitely have an advantage. And I don't know how you could ever argue otherwise, actually. Yeah. And no one's arguing that, like, they're not beautiful or, like, they're not good at their job. It's more just understanding that there's certain privileges that come with, like, you're 5'5 and walking in a Chanel show right or like you walked into the room and everyone already knew who you're who you were what your name was and you were respected and that's just like people models models fight for like respect and recognition i mean especially prior to social media for years i mean you walk into

castings and you meet the same casting directors over and over again they still don't know your name and they still don't know who you are where you came from and don't care so like as a nepo baby you have that respect already and it doesn't mean that they don't work hard once they're doing what they're doing but they've got a leg up no doubt yeah Yeah. And I know I'm trying to, like, put myself in their shoes. Yeah. Trying to be a little nepo baby. It's so funny how we got nepo babies. You just imagine all these little babies running around. But also, like, I don't think it's a, everything, everyone has advantages in different areas.

Yeah. I don't think that, I think nepo babies get themselves in trouble when they're like, no, I didn't have an advantage. And it's like, it's okay. You did. Yeah, like, I started comedy with a following. And that meant that, like, I was able to sell tickets before I was, like, where I wanted to be in comedy. And so it's like I had an advantage, but like just had a different way of getting to like similar places. Yeah, like already having a platform or a foundation to work off of. Exactly. But I don't like hate nepo babies or anything. Yeah, like I hate celebrities. They're different.

Just to clarify. This is not an anti-Nepo baby pod. We are pro-nepo babies. We just want them to understand their advantage. That's okay. Beautiful. Very well said. So to wrap this up, I always ask the same question at the end.

What advice would you give people when they're in their hell, when they're in their darkness, when life is really hard? How do you cope with that darkness? Oh my gosh, the darkness. I think that recognizing the darkness is the first and foremost most important. Sometimes I don't even recognize my own darkness that I'm like in it. And then you're like, oh, I'm like not in a good place. Therapy. It's like the only thing I feel like that really, but you have to recognize that you need the help first and that you need to like talk to someone, a third party, have someone kind of let you know, like it's okay.

You're going to get through this and have that support. I know that's a luxury, but for me, that's how I deal with my darkness. Yeah, I feel like I agree because I don't know I'm depressed sometimes until I'm out of it. And you're like, oh my God, I have like a monkey off my back. Yeah. I was actually feeling it recently because I was like, gosh, like doing these daily tasks are like so hard right now. And all I want to do is like lay down and watch TikTok. And I don't want to see anyone. And I tend to like withdraw from like friends and people. I was like, I don't know what is up with me. And then I was like, oh, I'm in it. I'm in the dark. I got there. I'm in the dark place. You're in the not as enjoyable D. Yeah. Hell, but I'm like in the murky like borderline. Yes. And I think once as you get older, you kind of know those red flags. Like I'm like brushing my. My teeth seems like so exhaust. Right.

And then you're able to be like, okay, let's do some things. Like, at the end of the I feel like we are plants where it's like, let's drink some water. Let's go for a little walk. Yeah. And then let's reassess. You've been on TikTok for seven weeks straight. Mm-hmm. Even though it's fun and we're researching.

Yes. So true. Is that your excuse? Yeah. I'm like, I'm literally researching. I'm working. I'm working. Hard work.

So, Emily, where can people follow you, watch you? Like, give me all the tea. Yeah, you can find me at Emily Diedonado on Instagram, D-D-D-D-D-N-O-E-N-O-E-N-O-E-N-O-E-Y, and my skincare is Covee, just at Covey on Instagram. Yes, C-O-V-E-Y. I highly recommend. Don't you have a new product out? Or you just sent some new stuff?

We just launched a body lotion. Yes, which I think you'll be getting. Yes, I should be getting seen. I'm so excited. Thank you for coming to hell with me. We'll talk to you guys later. Bye. Bye.

Thank you.