Berner Phone - Jiaoying Summers: Dumpster Baby & Divorce

Episode Date: October 10, 2022

Jiaoying left China to pursue her dream of being an actress. Her journey is sad, hilarious, scary, inspiring, and incredible. Get tickets to my stand up HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Before we go to the dark depths of hell today, I need to let you guys know about my stand-up shows coming up. First dibs for my little devies. So I'm actually in the Midwest and I'm going to be in Rosemont, Illinois. So that's like right by the O'Hare Airport. And we have a couple tickets left this Saturday, October 14th. Then I'm going to Grand Rapids, Michigan for a whole weekend. Shout out, Michigan. And then I have a couple tickets left in Minneapolis on October 28th. And then Paige and I are Giggly Squad, Atlanta, Georgia. And then I just announced, you heard it here first, Huntsville, Alabama and Nashville, Tennessee in January. Check it out, hannah burner.com. Thanks, guys. this is such an exciting episode because i met this woman at the laugh factory i sat down next to her

and immediately we fell in love we did we almost made out we we we almost did it but uh i don't think that people know me they know i'm gay yet so we didn't want to yeah we that wasn't the night to come out with our relationship yeah we did send des some messages in mandarin that were Loving messages. Loving, sexy. Very hot. We have Zhao Ying Summers on. I'm here in New York City.

And you are an incredible comedian, huge on TikTok, and you're famous for taking American names. Roasting American names. Roasting American names. So I want to know, what does Hannah mean in Chinese? Well, your mom is very rude when she was naming you, but she's being very poetic about it. like a hand means stupid but

nah means oh so Hannah means oh stupid Benner Ben means dumb but na means oh

so your name is oh stupid dumb so it's like not stupid dumb like your mom she was trying to

be like poetic about it so my mom name is dumb slut yeah But what were you saying about pretty names versus ugly names? So like in Chinese culture, like the nicknames, the names like the Feng Shre is that if you have ugly names, it means your parents want to protect you from the like evil. Because if your name is perfect, the evil is going to take your luck.

So if you have that dumb, stupid, like, oh dumb, oh stupid. It like tricks the evil spirit. Yeah, yeah, the evil just leave you along. So you get to develop your talent. your beauty and your good career but your name is like like Cassie Cam means successful

see me skinny all Cassies are fat dumb bitches You can't have everything Like if your mom is fucking Chinese They know the name right Like she doesn't know what's going on You have to defeat Feng Shui by having dumb names What's Fang Shui?

Feng Shui is literally just I think is a balance of energy Oh Okay what does Zhao Ying mean That's why I'm losing in life Jiao Ming is brilliant that's why my mom triggered the evil in my life that's why my husband left me

my son is not really bright my daughter is smart but she's slow at speaking so my mom yeah my mom is the blessing of my life she gave me all the materials it's like you know I did the Jada joke everybody was like you're going to get canceled fuck you bitch my mom saw that I was crying the mom people are just going to cancel me look at those comments my mom said nobody

treat my daughter this way so she wrote her comments in chinese then she tries into english she replied that how dare you say this about my daughter she does not have a career you said in your bio that you're a dumpster baby yeah what does that mean well so i was born in china in the 90s you know when i was born my father asked my mom would she live my mom said she will if you just bring her back from the dumpster. Were you born during the one child act? Yeah, one child policy. So normally they would

want a boy. Yeah. You can only have one. If your first girl is first child is a girl, you kind of discard that girl. You cannot. You just, uh... But people would do it. Like, they would get rid of the baby. Wow. Give it away. That's a good case. The bad case is like put it on the train rack or put in the dumpster You're the only child

My mom had one more And it's still a girl So she tried one more time It's the son But she had to give up her job Or a house As a big fine She has to pay

To keep having babies Oh yeah Because they charge you If you want to keep the babies Yeah like your job They take your job And they also take your house It's

Most people don't have the courage To keep having babies Why did she want to She just want to have a son So she can be people can respect her my son

my brother the moron he doesn't talk to me the only time like he communicative to me is when I transmit for money to him he hired a transaction like that's the only time

so how has it affected you growing up were people valued men so much I really don't need to know that I they try to take me to the domicester but my mom kept telling me that She'd make sure I know that

Whenever I have an A minus in school She would be like I did not bring you back from the dumpster for 3 minus I'm like I heard that memory You know how to tell me all the time You have to know it all the time Because you just keep a fucking up shit Do you know what I did for you?

I heard that also You keep telling me that You're so stunning and classy And beautiful looking But you said when you were younger They thought you were ugly Yeah my nickname was a kid fighter I didn't understand why they were so mean to me until I saw my baby photos

I was ugly they called me dumpling lips it was my lips were so big that it took half of the face also it's the winter it's very cold like so in China is it considered ugly to have big lips yes they want you have little cherry lips like what you call the baby bird asshole like the tiny little you can't bear it tell it but there's a lip there so the tinier the better but then you come to America and everyone is injecting their lips to have the biggest lips possible yeah in America they asked me do you have the fillers I'm like no I have baby bird asshole tiny lips I'm pretty they're like no no no no honey America big lips sexy I'm like I'm sure are you serious about this so when did you do this so when did you leave China when I was turning

18 years old. Did you know you want to leave at 18? I want to leave ASAP because I think something's confusing there because I'm very ugly because I'm dark and I have big lips. Then I see the Hollywood movies. Harley Berry is the most beautiful girl and we all know she is and all of those gorgeous black ladies, Latinos people with darker skin color, they are gorgeous. I just feel like maybe I'm not ugly.

Maybe the standard of beauty is fucked up and I want to be an actress anyway. So why don't I just go to Hollywood? it well actually does you guys know my husband speaks mandarin and he was showing me he knows right what beautiful is considered in china yeah and how the chinese like for example i heard lucy lou we think is gorgeous but in china they don't yeah they they they call her ugly in china like me and lucy lu we we're dumb and dumber like we would not be the leading ladies in china because they want a babybird asshole lips they don't want freckles they want you to be bleached white like wider than they Co-Kalman's bleached asshole.

Like, they want you to be white. They, like, they have IV treatment to bleach your skin, to remove the amatone from your skin. I was required to do that for Chinese movie, and I quit. Oh, my God. What kind of plastic surgery are they doing in China? Well, remove your bones and jawline to make sure your face is V-shaped, like, as tiny as it gets. Do you know Fan Bing Bing, like the Chinese actress? She has a V-shaped face.

She's a standard beauty. Your nose has to be, like, as tall as skinny as a fucking, I don't know, like American ego. Then you have to have huge eyes like Yes Like American people Like they want you to have big big eyes So so many women go into the knife To look like Bing Bing

Yes Yeah Wow That's the set of beauty I So they don't want you to have a jaw They want me to cover it up Or remove it or they want me also

To bleach my skin Because I was also lose 40 pounds Obviously They want me to be Floating like a ghost Like a fucking chopstick Not a good one Like the cheap one from the

they meet the restaurants. I'm done. I work so hard to come to America, to see the diversity, to learn that I am beautiful, to be okay with my skin. I can't go back to China and bleach my skin to like all the girls who's ugly like me.

I wanted them to know, oh my God, why she had that confident? What's wrong with this ugly girl? Then we're like, oh, I can do that too, you know? I don't want to bleach myself and look like a fun Bing Bing.

No. So you basically, we're like, I'm not the one that needs to change. Yeah, I think I'm going to become a big star in Hollywood and come back and fuck all up your stupid standard. Yeah, so you... And get all the dark girls being sassy and shit. Yeah.

So at 18, you go to Hollywood. I went to Kentucky for college. Oh, which college? University of Kentucky. Oh, my gosh. So Southern. Yeah. What was that culture shock like?

Well, I was still ugly there. Because, you know, I don't have confidence. I'm just always like a slouching trying to like make myself smaller too and having my big ugly glasses covering my hair and just like hiding in the corner like a dog and I just I was a mask tutor as a part-time job is very not Chinese of me to be a master. I'm so special. I think a black man changed my life. What do you do? Well I was a mass tutor. I did not know anything. I about the basketball team. You know, it was a big deal.

I remember that I started tutoring the basketball guys. Then all my friends start becoming nicer to me because they wanted autographs. Well, the Kentucky guys were like the top team. Yeah. So all of the girls and guys, they want to be nicer to me so they can get autographs from those people. And then the guys who play basketball, I know they are cool. I didn't know how big they are because I didn't follow sports.

I remember that one time that one of the guy, He's a big deal now, I think. And he said that we won, I was allowed to invite you to our after party. I just looked away because there's another girl, the Chinese girl, look like Van Binh Binh. She's a friend of mine. She's hot. I know he's not talking to me. So I just looked away.

Like, remember, like, legally blonde? When Jennifer Hulik, she's like, a... Yeah, when the mailman comes in. She's like... Look at that. I just look away. like that and then he's like what's her number she's like my phone number is eight

he's like no no I'm talking to her I'm like me it's like a rom-com it is I'm like me he's like yeah I'm like I literally I was shaking because no guys want me like Chinese guys hate me and then like I'm like I just start the basketball team wants your number yeah so I was like what I start stuttering I just don't know what to say and then the Chinese Bing Bing girl she's she's so cocky.

I mean, she always verbally abused me. I like her because she's hot. I know she's harder than me. I'm brainwashed, you know. She's like, excuse me. She's not pretty in China.

Her skin's too dark. I'm the pretty one. Are you sure you want her number? To a black man. That's how outrageous those people are. They just think they are hot because they are bleached asshole white

and skinny, like a chopstick. He just losing it. Like the black guy, he just started laughing. So hard, he fell. He sat down the floor. He's not laughing. He's like, damn, bitch, you're jealous.

Shit. I just got up. I'm like, that's my number. And I would look back to Bingby. I'm like, Bing, B, you can be my plus one. I was it. I just went to my hot friends. I'm like, you better get me pretty.

Let's get eye contact lenses. Let's do the hair. Let's put on the makeup. I'm not slouching anymore. I'm going. Like, I'm going to be pretty today. Did you have sex with one of the basketball player? I wish I did.

I was a virgin. too, like I had my first boyfriend because I just, I just didn't think anybody wanted me. It was so sad. But I want people to know, like, you, when people look at you now, you're so full of confidence and you inspire so many women to speak about their family, their sexuality. And you also are a mother now. I have two kids. Two children.

I have two of them. I didn't learn from my mistakes, you know. well you and you just i met you during your divorce yes do you have any advice for people going through a divorce congratulations if you are going through a divorce congratulations it means you're changing for the best i think so if you decided to leave because you know you deserve better and i just feel like i don't want to feel bad for you and you should not feel bad for yourself i think it's for happiness yes yes but it takes bravery It does. It's really hard, especially when you have kids. You have, as a woman, we have that kind of guilt. Oh, I should suck it up and just like make sure the family is together. But it's not healthy. When you are unhappy, the kids are smarter than us. They know. They know you are unhappy. They know you are fighting. And they just very stressed out in that kind of environment. They all are stressed out. They want a happy mom. Yeah, they want a happy mom.

So I was reading about you When did you decide to become a comedian I guess being ugly and being not wanted my whole life I just really dying for affection I want people to like me But it's hard for girls want to be my friend Because I wasn't pretty Hard for boys want to be my friend because I wasn't pretty

Then I just spend all my time reading books And try to be good at school And I was very good at school So I just let them copy my homework They were nice to me then I just try to get attention by being funny and being witty and it works. It just never work as romantically. Like, it doesn't matter how funny you are.

As long as you're ugly, it's just so hard to get guys to like me. I write them love poetry. And they just say, you would, you look pretty for a girl who's very dark, but I just can't date you because I'm very popular. I don't want my friend to make fun of me. It's so bad. I came to Kentucky University and I learned economics and the theater. I like to do acting.

I came to Hollywood. I started with Howard Fine, like a serious, serious acting. It was, I think I'm getting auditions, I getting callbacks, but my accent is just what stopping me. It's really just. When did you learn English? I learned something in high school, but I can say, how are you?

I'm good. Thank you. And you, I'm good, too. Thank you very much. I'm fine. So that's the good thing I have. Where's the bathroom? Yeah.

Where's the WC? Because we learned from British English. The WC. Oh, it's British. And with Kentucky, I got lost in the airport in O'Hare in Chicago. I couldn't find where should I transfer? I don't, I just realized nobody understands my English. Yeah.

They still don't understand my English. I go, what did you say? But you go to Hollywood with an accent and you want to be an actress. I do. Yes. I still want to. Yes. Hi, CAA.

I still want to be an actress. I do. I'm very, I remember. that one time I was auditioning for this I sent in a tape I had a callback for John Singleton's movie No, not a movie, it's a TV series called The Rebel It's about this African-American girl

She's a cop and her set kick Is this Asian American girl who They are both from San Francisco So the Chinese girl I auditioned for her Her name is Karma They liked me I remember I forgot one line I started improvising

And everybody's laughing their ass off John Singleton just walked across table with his phone playing Ali wants stand-up clip he's like you should do stand-up this is what you'd be doing this is you're going to be a star if you do stand-up I was like oh my god do I have the role he said no

he goes no go do an open mic bitch you can't be my TV show bitch but he he asked my phone number he said I want to check in with you in a few months to make sure you did an open mic it will be very important for you to try this so you did it I didn't do it.

I was defeated. I didn't know the idea of stand. I didn't have the culture of stand-up. I didn't know George Cullen and any Bruce, Joan Rivers. I didn't know the great. I just saw the, oh, oh, no. I failed in acting. I can't, like, oh, my God.

So I know a lot about acting. You know, I know the actress, who's good, the history, everything. I just felt very defeated. I remember I got a gig to go to Shanghai Film Festival to host this event. And then I met Richard. guy and then we just got married. I was like, oh, I'm just going to have kids, I guess. And then all my friends are just like their careers are taking off. They move with moral strips. They are with CIA, Myanmar's endeavor. And I'm just sitting there getting fed and the postpartum

depression and realized that I'm so unhappy without a career. So I got a phone message from John Singleton. Do you have your first open bag yet? I see because we follow each other on Instagram. Oh, you are married. You have kids now. It's been like six months, seven months. I'm like, no. He's like, you should do it. You better be doing it. So I went to one and it was bad.

I'm fucking bombed. It was so bad. I don't remember what I said. I do remember I was walking down the stage. Somebody was like, oh shit, somebody should not be doing comedy. I went to the bar. I had three vodka shots. I went to the car and cry.

You know when you're breasting, you can't cry. The milk is shooting out. My shirt is wet now. I can't come back. for another mic what do i do oh i have a little bottle i should catch the milk for my son to you know and then i'm like no this is vodka in there he can't drink this then i'm gonna dump it i'm like wait i don't want dump this i can drink this is a white russian i'm like that's a good joke that's a good joke so i wrote it down crying with my breast milk

puking everywhere crying right it down on my notebook and i try that joke it kind of got me a laugh and I'm like I'm doing this next day I just search the five open mics I drive all over the town pumping my milk

doing open mic and then I realize there's not enough time for me I should buy my own club see that's what happens when you don't marry for love well yeah

tell me about this club I just feel like I'm a hardworking communist like I'm not a communist I'm American now but like if I don't I'm not smart I'm not pretty

but I know if I want something I'm just going to put the hard work like one day they'll notice this bitch who's just been doing this forever just keep doing it so I heard the 10,000 hours rule and I was calculating because I'm so good at calculating I'm so good at calculating

I'm Chinese that's why Zach McEberg had a yeah yeah Mark Zachberg has a Chinese wife like who else is capable of counting all his money right so I know how to count my things

I'm like this is not going to add up like you do the lottery mic you spend so many hours you don't barely get on this I can't I can't compete with people I need to be sneaky about this shit I'll buy my club I do 10 hours a day 10 hours open mic today so that's what I did I went I drove around I saw this place on Marrose as closing store they are leasing they are losing money so I just bought that store and I just had my um contractor coming in spend one week turning into a black box theater

And it took me one week to renovate it. I was sitting there all day doing it. And then after done, I just opened up and it becomes the hardest underground comedies in LA. Every day is packed. You have to sign up a day or two days before. What's it called? The Hollywood comedy.

I bought another one in Pasadena when I bought a house over there. But I got off it later because my touring gets so busy and I have no energy for that. So the Hollywood one is like there. The main one. And it's very important because I have all shows, like a black girl magic, all Asian female lead, Asian male lead, like an LGBT show.

They are all shows that normal club would be like, this is not going to sell. Well, yeah, for people who don't know comedy, there's a lot of gatekeepers, a lot of white dudes. I know, all white guys. Or white women who are doing the booking. And for you to have your own club is huge to just change the power dynamic. Yeah, I just, I'm on stage every minute. When I'm not on stage, I'm on TikTok trying out new jokes. How much?

Yes, that's what I tell people. I said, use TikTok to try your jokes. To write. Exactly. Even just a premise and see what you come up with. Because I do seven or six, when I just started with my 10 hours, oh, Mike, I do six or five jokes on TikTok and which one blow up, I would drop that one. That's what I do.

That one goes, one million views. So I'm going to be writing. So in a typical day, what does your day look like right now? wake up in the morning, I, uh, I open my phone so I can look at all those skinny, pretty bitches and feel bad about myself. And then I, I hate on them secretly. Then I, um, post my stand-up clips and hope it's going to go viral and try to ask the La Factory to do collaboration. And they see in as E and they saw it, but they ignore me. I say, but one of my clip went to 12 million views. It's a thing. Heart, unsend. And then I'm like, I'll post this one on TikTok, on

Instagram. I mean, like everywhere. My assistant, I have a beautiful Jewish New Yorker girl who is my assistant. So she worked for me six hours a day. She would do all the posting. She edits and stuff. I have an editor, a team editor, a group editor. They work for me. They are in the Philippines, you know. Yeah, they do it fast. They are fast and they are a little cheaper. Yeah. You outsource. And they listen. They don't get defensive.

They just want to take the money. Like an American editor, they got their feelings hurt. I'm like, you don't have feelings, honey. You're an editor. You listen to me. I pay you. Like, you don't, like, how many photos do you have on TikTok? Two people, you want to tell me where the punchline is going to cut?

So how often do you write? Every day. I would write, like, last night. I told you I was like Gaffir's podcast. Jeffrey's podcast and I they have free coffee and that's my weakness like I don't like coffee at all it's disgusting but it's free so I drink the three cups and then I woke up at two I had a nightmare that my face looked like John Rivers but without her talent so I was shit so I wrote something I started writing things anything for my for my one hour tonight

so I wrote some new stuff I love that I I'm such a big fan of yours like I'm obsessed with in so many ways and I loved you the moment I met you I love you I was like oh my god we're sisters

in a past life we're just like I know you are famous but seeing you in person it just I was hoping you are a cunt

but because I don't want you have everything I don't want to be successful beautiful and also a nice person because that means you're going to be

a huge huge huge star if you're a county she's like yeah yeah but she's difficult to work with you know like Catherine Heggos

yeah so go far until she burns bridges with everyone yeah yeah yeah but then you were nice i'm like oh god no i love you also i read that like you started doing comedy how did that affect your marriage uh i think that ended my marriage and also saved me from depression yeah and it helped me find who i am oh i got chills yeah it did because you said you had some postpartum depression it was very bad that uh i actually i had a therapist before I got married to my ex-husband, he's a Chinese man. Summers is not his name.

Summers is, I hate when people, like, they have show business. They have their, like, an actor name, you know, comedian name. My name wasn't Zhao Ying Liang. It's just Zhaoing Summers. No, it's, I give myself Summers. Why Summers? Because my ex-husband's name is Sha, X-I-A. Sha.

I can't be Zhao-Jing. Shia. Like, Sha means summer. So he's Chinese. So when I was naturalized, I was having the opportunity to rename myself. I'm like, I need to be, my name need to flow. Zhao Ying Liang doesn't flow.

Zhao Ying Xia sounds like I sell them song by the subway. I mean, I don't make fun of them. They make more money than me. But I think Sha, summer. It means summer, summer. I love summer. You know, I love Los Angeles. I love summer.

I think I love sunshine. fine. But Jiao Ying summer doesn't run, you know, like a donut summer it rams. But like Jiaoian summer just doesn't work. I'm like, summers. So it's like, it flows. It flows better. Yeah, flows. So you dealt with depression before kids. It's bad. Depression before kids. Yes, because I, I'm just like extremely ambitious, but without the talent. And just that when you are super, super ambitious, you don't have the talent. Did your parents talk about mental health at all growing? No, they think if you are depressed, you are weak. So mental health is it talked about in China?

It is. It's like if you want to kill yourself, you should do it because there's more room and parking for other people. Did you say parking? That's what mom says. Go ahead. You don't die too young. You are 30 years overdue. 30 years beyond goodbye.

So how did you get the balls to go to therapy? I got so depressed I started writing a lot I'm a poet I studied classical Chinese literature So I do calligraphy and poetry In classical Chinese literature I read like a collection of poetry

Like 800 poems my whole life When I was younger in China I loved to write It helps me so much But then I came to America I don't speak English well And I don't I can't read in English I just been

I really want to become so great at something acting wasn't working out for me my accent is stopping me from everything literally they won't give me a call back and then they discussed we're like no you are not somehow you're not you're not you know they just don't take a risk on you it just you know it doesn't work and it's I'm so depressed I don't know what should I do and then I just feel like I should talk to somebody I start doing therapy it helps me so much with my depression but after I got married my ex-husband was very against therapy. He's very traditional. It's very Chinese. So after the baby, I think I'm

very depressed. I was really upset. And he's like, because you are so selfish. It's not about you. It's about the baby. If you are sad about the baby, you don't, you are a bad mom. You are a bad mom. I want to go to my therapy. He's like, you should not go there, they are. It should not do that. You don't have to be so weak. It got so bad. We started argue a lot because I started doing the open mic. He said, what kind of woman come home? 11 p.m. with the makeup and look like this, only the horrors. I'm like, how would you, why would you say that to me?

Obviously, I'm not a whore. The horrors make more money than I go there to pay, to buy a drink to get a lottery on the mic. Like, I don't make any money. It was so bad, so bad. But you. Fight every day. Every day I cry and then my depression got worse and I just, one day there's a big fight

and that's the first time I was suicidal, first time in my life. And then it was really bad. I literally, I almost tried to kill myself. But I didn't die. I called my ex. I had two husband. My first husband, my college sweetheart. Really?

Yeah. Yeah, I called him. I feel like before I die, I'll call two persons. My ex-husband, because he was the best thing ever happened to me, I didn't really understand what I needed in my life. He was a scientist. He's amazing, caring, two years younger than me. But he's a scientist.

He's very good at what he do. and he just think I'm the most beautiful girl smart as charming he's Russian-American yeah charming smart everything I do

he's approved whenever I don't get an audition he'll be like fuck those people they are so fucking stupid they have missing out more than I don't do an audition

my ex-husband like the Chinese guy would be like you should not be doing this because he's being rejected like 500 times you should just give up because you just don't have it

so it's just I you know I want to tell him I'm sorry for not understanding what I had and everything. He, no, I'm a bitch. He's like, something's wrong.

What do you apologize to me? What's wrong with you? Are you okay? I said, yeah, I'm good. I'm just wanted to tell you this before I go somewhere. He's like, no, no, listen, I don't know what's going on, but you have to understand that you are very special, you are beautiful, you are smart, you are brilliant, people love you, you make people laugh,

and you are very successful, you are going to become very successful. You become a big star. I just stick my hands in my throat and they got all the pills out, that vomited everything out. Really? And I'm like, I'm not dying. Fuck this shit.

Wow. And then, I mean, he didn't want me back because I broke his heart, but anyway. I love you. I left my heart in Denver. Oh, Denver? He left California for Denver to, stay away from my toxic energy.

Wait, so, so you, you avoid, like, being stuck in a horrible marriage. You find your new joy. You're now single. I'm single. Guys, I'm single. I'm single. Also, like, the problem with me is that I cannot use sex toys. That's your problem.

Yeah, it's very bad. I can't use a vibrator. I've never used a vibrator because it's, I'm a Chinese woman. plus he's Chinese, like, it knows when it's impossible burger. Like, it's impossible, beyond burger. Beyond burger, whatever. I don't want, it's beyond me that it's not real meat. Like, I can not deal with it.

It's not. Whatever, I try to put a vibrator. It's like a priest to try to tell what devil, like, the power of press, the power of Christ compels you. Then, like, the fucking vibrator just fly to the sitting like a cross. It just doesn't work. I just. It doesn't work.

I wish it works so, you know, I'm not, like, so lonely. Yeah. But you've, because you've dated, you've been married twice, you've learned a lot about relationships. I do, but I'm always in this long-ass relationship. I never had, like, my slut, I'm slutty. But I never had this, like, the slut girl's college days. Because when you were ugly in college, like, you don't get to have it.

Yeah. And then I found I was pretty, after all the makeup and the Botox and the, you know. ching implants and everything but then it's like I got married yes and then then I married again and I'm just like you know it's a long-term runnerships like I just and I don't use like that's why I don't use vibrator but now you are single you're like oh shit it's like a female committee to catch a dick it's like if you don't use it you lose it I know I can't I I just I'm really upset like I tried to use a rabbit it just it doesn't work I just I don't know it just it flies away but you also still have two kids what's it like navigating being a touring a touring stand-up

it's like the beauty about not giving a fuck about them is like really good for you i'm kidding i'm just so lucky my mother she's making up making up to me yes for being here full-time she moved to america to help me with my babies full-time after my husband left me i left him by the way i left him yes i left him yes my mother is full-time helping me me. I have a full-time nanny. Yes. And she's also a maid. She makes food. She's a Chinese woman. She's very abusive towards me too, but she's great. I remember my husband left one month later. I said, I want to have steak. She's like, I went to the market, bought the fish. The fish was like flopping around. You're going to eat this fish. You're fat bitch. Because you have to, the best revenge is to look hot to make your husband angry. Be stronger. Look at this fish. Eat this fish. She's like that My mom's like her I said mom she called me fed

My mom's like she's the keeper Oh my gosh Okay We're gonna play a game Called the Seven Deadly Sins I mean you're already deep in hell I am yeah Seven Deadly Sins

What are you greedy about Fame Do you feel like when you were younger you knew you were going to be famous? Yeah. I never, I think I would, I had my period when I was 15. So I wasn't mature early and I never had sex until I was older. But like when I was watching TV and then Madonna, she was talking to her,

I think somebody was asking her, like, you are so famous Madonna. Like, how do you think about fame? She said, as long as I'm not as famous as Jesus. says, I won't be happy. And when I heard that, I was wet. Who are you envious of? Envious of. I guess Angela Jolie.

Angela Jolie. I just don't get it why she didn't go to China and take me from the dumpster. So I can fuck a bra pit. Oh, Daddy. Sweeney has nothing on me. Oh, my God. What are you glutton this about? So what's your, like, guilty pleasure?

Guilty pleasure is, like... Not sex toys. Not sex toy, but, like, looking at beautiful men wanting to fuck them, but, like, I know they are not going to answer my DMs, so just like, looking at them, imagine fucking them. Like a brat pit. Yeah, I'm very horny. I just don't use sex toy. And also, like, I don't want to fuck guys who can't afford me because I can't afford me.

True. It's not worth it. True. So I... You're protecting them. Yeah, I just, I just imagine fucking Brad Pitt. He's single. He might be seeing Emily Radha, but like, whatever.

When's the last time you experienced extreme anger? In the morning? What happened? When I saw this female comedian who's getting in the festivals that I should be getting than me and she is prettier than me and she has better outfits and she's getting fucked well. Skin looks good. I, it was, I'm not happy.

When was the last time you were lazy, a sloth? Right after I curbed out from the dumpster. I took a little nap. Before, I got, I have to keep my eyes open because they always try to be taking me back to the dumpster. So I have to like keep one eye open, even if I'm sleeping. But you don't drink coffee. You just naturally have a lot of energy. I have a lot of energy.

I drink coffee when it's free. Yes, free coffee. I don't pay for it. Free coffee. When was the last time you let your ego get in the way of something? how's your ego yeah it was it's it's not good my ego can be can be big and i i i think like i i think i saw that my ex-husband is going to get on his knees and beg me for the convenience but he's like oh get the fuck out bitch i just i was studying there i'm like and and get the fuck out

i'm like oh shit but you held your own oh yeah and you did not Fold. No, I didn't fold. For something that you didn't think was right for you. He wasn't right for me. No. He's right for some bleached asshole Bing Bing, Skinny Bitches. Not this thick bitch.

Who's your celebrity crush? Propped. I'm single and I don't want to brag. After I had the baby, my pussy snap back. Bam. It's tighter than ever. Bing. I try to put it rabbit before I was having the baby.

I mean, before I was married, before I had babies, it's too big for me. After babies, after all my, I kego and everything, I try to put back, it's still too big. But I'm happy, I like a Michael B. Jordan. Good. You manifested. Yeah, I just like, like his lips, all lip. Michael, Michael B. Jordan, we can make, we can really make some serious, beautiful, blasian babies. Hashtag tiger woods, you know, tiger woods. We can make tiger woods.

literally manifesting I'm like beautiful babies imagine belatian babies like oh my god you want more babies if it's Michael be Jordan yeah oh my god his lips

yes beautiful okay calm down breathe keep it in your pants final question what advice would you give to the listeners on how to cope with your hell when you're going through it when it's when it's the toughest time.

How do you survive? I think going through hell is like you are just a mud of copper, whatever bullshit that is like in shitty shape. You don't know what's going on. But going through hell is going to make you come out as a trophy. That's the shape. You have to go through heartbreaks, loneliness,

betrayals, sinus, sinless, suicidal souls to mold yourself into the person you want to be. So going through hell is a process I think is good. If you are going through hell, it means that you are going to become someone you want to be. If you are comfortable, just, but don't like it, I don't think it's better than going through hell. I just feel like you can be, you can be anything you want. You decide who you can be. You define yourself. Nobody can tell you, you can't do it. You can do it. Fuck them. Fuck all of them. I love that so much. You can make me cry.

Yeah, fuck all of them. Fuck all of those motherfuckers. Yeah. Jiao Ying, where can people follow you, watch you? Give me all the tea. Follow me on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube at Jiao Ying Summers. J-I-A-O-Y-I-N-G-U-M-M-E-R-S. The Summers was the hard part.

Just make sure you get that one. Zhao Ying, I already can see it. It's like Beyonce. No, it's not. It's a Beyonce wannabe. website at jawingisowers.com I tour buy my tickets

if you are not cheap buster if you are crazy rich Asian buy tickets for all your family if you are broke just come I'll get you in come yes yes

you guys need to follow her you need to see her live I'll probably be on shows with you in Hollywood when you say soon I love you so much I love you so much thanks for coming to hell

you guys bye bye bye Thank you.